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Previously in the Service...
Me, a secret agent?
VERY TOP SECRET
This operation is top secret.
No need to tell Calot.
He'll feel hurt to have been left out.
No half-measures with barbarity!
He's mad at us.
-You have friends, Calot? -No.
If you're training to identify and eliminate
presumed terrorists,
Algiers is paradise.
- Training-wise... - Don't ask me.
Mission unstamped, mission unchecked.
I did eliminate.
Mission failed.
APPROVED
Cheating on me?
Where was your suit made?
Algiers.
- How about a movie Saturday? - Sure.
- See you then. - Perfect.
WHEREVER NECESSITY KNOWS NO LAW
Hello?
Who is this?
Hello?
Shake the plum tree. Something will always fall.
A VERY SECRET SERVICE
Tomorrow?
Yes, tomorrow.
It's all set?
You just need to sign.
Marie-Jo...
It feels odd.
It's procedure.
There are always people behind procedure, Mr. Lechiot.
Do you remember
the induction ceremony for C-level officers
as stated in promotion procedure?
Gathering, congratulations, drinks.
And basket.
Basket? For C-level?
Basket.
LOGISTICAL SUPPORT MANAGEMENT
Please check the suitability of the material.
Suitable.
Material collected.
You first.
I have nothing on me.
I hate to break a hundred.
I'll get change.
I'm counting on you.
"Priviet".
"Priviet".
The temperature here can fall to minus 30.
Even minus 40.
It's a microthermal climate, so it's sunny.
I don't quite understand what happened at the phone booth.
Cold invigorates man.
It energizes him for the collective production effort.
The Soviet people
are much healthier
than our self-centered capitalist nations.
If I follow you,
you said Vladimir Kosloff works for the CIA.
But it's not true?
So why did you say it?
Psychological destabilization of the enemy.
Don't ever forget.
Shake the plum tree.
I'm cold. It must be minus 20.
Think we're bugged?
Good reflexes.
But we're safe here.
No, I'm really cold.
Excellent.
I like you, Merlaux.
That's African currency.
You know Africa...
Divide by 50 to get a franc.
Just like with their work.
GENERAL GOVERNMENT OF ALGERIA
Fill in the name.
Felt slippers, reference CH768A.
Two pairs.
Two pairs of pajamas, reference PM412V.
Your chapkas weren't recorded.
How do you know what they are?
I run Supplies. It's my job.
Why weren't they recorded?
They're a gift I bought.
It's forbidden to bring unreferenced items to Supplies.
I'm sorry. I didn't know.
I'll put them in my desk.
It's forbidden to leave Supplies with unreferenced items.
They're just a gift. For a friend.
It's mine. Give me an X3 exception form.
Sign the X3.
Thank you for covering for me.
Let it be a lesson.
The plum tree...
The CIA is here. Join them.
The CIA?
An unplanned friendly visit.
Sorry, I have a mission report to file.
Mr. Calot, come on! The CIA, the Americans...
The CIA... Kids compared to the KGB.
Be a dear. Get me a J475 and a tape recorder.
All right.
- You go. It's more your age. - Come.
The CIA...
Merlaux...
Our friends from the CIA.
They're here on a friendly visit.
As friends.
Merlaux is our latest recruit.
On trial.
You speak English?
We're all thrilled with our collaboration.
It's lasted since our triumph over barbarity.
A triumph that our friends contributed to.
Otherwise, how do your presidential elections look?
Good. Richard Nixon will be elected.
Kennedy's too young. He looks like a kid.
People need mature men, men with experience.
Like de Gaulle.
Or Petain.
He may not be mature, but Kennedy is charming.
In any case, we have ways to decredit him.
Discredit.
Really? How?
He likes women.
Yes...
He likes women a lot.
Yes...
But to discredit Kennedy, do you know his flaws?
Women.
Yes, and?
He sleeps around a lot.
Not good for a politician.
Why not?
Calot...
My report is on your desk.
Fine.
Now that we're all here, let's have lunch.
We have a big problem to settle.
What problem?
Him.
Sorry? What does he want?
You. You we want.
We want you.
He outed our best KGB double agent.
Vladimir Kosloff?
He was your agent?
The best.
We didn't know. Which proves that our agents
didn't out him.
A cheap fake. Nothing new.
The Soviets did it first.
Here we go.
If you're not pro-American, you're a commie: QED.
Your agent betrayed us.
We want to take him to the USA
for interrogation by professionals.
This is France! You're not at home!
You wouldn't be at home either if we wasn't saved you.
In 1944.
Come now, let's not get carried away.
We're friends.
Let's talk after lunch.
Yes, it's Wednesday. Tripe special at Le Moderne.
"If we wasn't saved..." The mistakes they make!
I'm waiting.
You're the world's top agents.
You have no ideas at all?
A diamond?
That's absurd.
For a C-level promotion.
So don't make her happy.
We have four hours left.
Find a present for Marie-Jo.
Now, this CIA business.
Did you make that call?
It's an attempt at psychological destabilization.
By claiming Calot outed their agent, the Americans
want us to think Calot knew Kosloff was a double agent.
But how could he know, without being inside the KGB,
that is, without being a KGB agent himself?
It's a classic. Spread the rumor Calot's a double agent
and see how we react. Shake the plum tree. QED.
It's ironclad.
Ironclad.
Brouleaux?
Merlaux.
The Americans are friends. They'll calm down.
No doubt, but sort out this gift problem!
You're all so lacking in initiative!
And the basket?
It's being passed around.
Just like I said.
Shake a plum tree and you can fall from it.
Learn that lesson.
I'd say we were already under the tree.
Someone shook it before us.
Four, five, eight units all gang up together.
What now?
No idea.
The promotion party is in four hours.
I mean about the CIA.
- Will they drop it? - Don't mix everything up!
I wanted...
to mark the occasion.
Personally.
But with this plum tree thing...
If it helps, take one of the chapkas I brought back.
You have them anyway.
Great reflexes.
You're a good guy.
I owe you one.
Not at all. You teach me so much.
Why did you buy two chapkas for one friend?
I don't know her size.
So I bought two. At the GUM, very inexpensive.
You don't know your friend's size, yet she's your friend?
This was your plan.
- What plan? - Don't lie to me.
What exactly is your relationship with Marie-Jo?
Yes?
Knock-knock!
You took back 110 francs.
You're right.
Sorry.
Basket mission accomplished.
May I?
Thank you.
My dear Marie-Jo...
You are hereby named administrative secretary first-class.
The bureau without you, my dear Marie-Jo,
would be like a world without women.
Overly serious.
Messy... with no frills.
A world...
without a drinks trolley.
To mark your promotion, allow us to offer you this.
You're crazy...
A food mixer!
She mixes food... and he gets stewed!
You're like family to me.
88 francs...
Don't say a word.
Close your eyes.
Can I open them, Mr. Calot?
Mr. Calot?
What's wrong, Marie-Jo?
You don't like your mixer?
I'm worried about Mr. Calot.
Don't fret.
He just wanted to shake the plum tree.
Upstairs, they think he staged his own kidnapping.
Like that attack on Mitterrand last year.
If he ends up like him, thanks a lot!
They don't want me.
What shall we see?
"Le Bossu"?
No, swashbucklers are so boring!
"On guard, sire!" Who can watch that stuff?
At least we know what to expect. The other one...
But that's what's fun.
What did he say?
He said, "You make me want to puke."
What does "puke" mean?
THE END
Wasn't that amazing, Andrรฉ?
I've never seen a film like that.
Me neither.
Let's stay for the next show.
Don't you want a hot dog?
After.
It's starting again. Let's stay.
I'm glad to have shown Americans don't make the law in France.
It was obvious they were bluffing.
Their so-called agent
was returned by the KGB in exchange for nothing.
Nothing.
Which proves he was of no value at all.
QED.
But I must admit I'd never imagined
that shaking the plum tree would cause the whole CIA to fall.
Yes?
How was "Le Bossu"?
Any good?
I saw another film instead.
"Breathless".
Never heard of it.
Very modern, shot on the street.
It feels real, not like a movie.
People talk like in real life.
Why see in a theater what you can see on the street?
What?
All right, sleep well.
Goodnight, Dad.
Subtitles: Andrew Litvack
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