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It seems today that all you see
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00:00:04,984 --> 00:00:08,278
Is violence in movies and sex on TV
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00:00:08,288 --> 00:00:11,848
But where are those
good old-fashioned values
4
00:00:11,858 --> 00:00:14,851
On which we used to rely?
5
00:00:14,861 --> 00:00:18,354
Lucky there's a family guy
6
00:00:18,364 --> 00:00:21,658
Lucky there's a man
who positively can do
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All the things that make us
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Laugh and cry
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He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy!
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- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
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00:00:35,014 --> 00:00:38,107
Mr. and Mrs. Griffin, thanks
for coming in to see me today.
12
00:00:38,117 --> 00:00:39,375
Is this about Chris?
13
00:00:39,385 --> 00:00:41,478
We know he's been struggling lately.
14
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Well, let me put it this way.
15
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Parents of a failing student say what?
16
00:00:45,458 --> 00:00:46,683
- What?
- No, Peter, wait.
17
00:00:46,693 --> 00:00:49,452
Nope, too late; he said it.
I'm marking it.
18
00:00:49,462 --> 00:00:52,255
Didn't get the Woos;
they're very smart. Asian.
19
00:00:52,265 --> 00:00:54,457
Maybe they didn't understand me.
I don't know.
20
00:00:54,467 --> 00:00:56,693
The point is,
Chris's grades aren't improving,
21
00:00:56,703 --> 00:00:59,162
and just yesterday,
he caused a little ruckus
22
00:00:59,172 --> 00:01:00,597
in his history class.
23
00:01:00,607 --> 00:01:03,166
Alexander Hamilton was white
24
00:01:03,176 --> 00:01:06,336
I just can't understand
why he's doing so poorly.
25
00:01:06,346 --> 00:01:07,971
We here feel that the best solution
26
00:01:07,981 --> 00:01:11,975
is for Chris to attend something
called vocational school.
27
00:01:11,985 --> 00:01:13,943
Yeah, you know what?
Chris deserves a vocation.
28
00:01:13,953 --> 00:01:16,012
He's been working hard,
he's doing great in school...
29
00:01:16,022 --> 00:01:18,047
No, vocational school is where
30
00:01:18,057 --> 00:01:21,384
less academically capable
students learn a trade.
31
00:01:21,394 --> 00:01:24,053
Don't you have to be Italian
to go to one of those schools?
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Uhp, there will be plenty of those jokes
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00:01:25,865 --> 00:01:26,890
later in the episode.
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00:01:26,900 --> 00:01:28,558
Now, won't vocational school
35
00:01:28,568 --> 00:01:30,493
limit Chris's options down the road?
36
00:01:30,503 --> 00:01:31,728
Oh, hardly.
37
00:01:31,738 --> 00:01:34,097
He'll have a wide range
of career options,
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00:01:34,107 --> 00:01:35,265
such as the following:
39
00:02:02,902 --> 00:02:04,494
Those are three terrible options.
40
00:02:04,504 --> 00:02:06,362
Parents who are okay with this say what?
41
00:02:06,372 --> 00:02:07,430
- What?
- Gotcha.
42
00:02:07,440 --> 00:02:09,040
That one's on you, Lois.
43
00:02:13,046 --> 00:02:15,572
Why, Meg, don't you look pretty today.
44
00:02:15,582 --> 00:02:16,706
Thanks, Mom.
45
00:02:16,716 --> 00:02:18,207
She's going to ask you for something.
46
00:02:18,217 --> 00:02:20,043
So, listen, I was wondering.
47
00:02:20,053 --> 00:02:21,377
Do you think you could take Stewie
48
00:02:21,387 --> 00:02:22,979
to a birthday party today?
49
00:02:22,989 --> 00:02:24,581
The birthday boy was premature,
50
00:02:24,591 --> 00:02:27,016
so he looks like
a 12-inch-tall Rachel Dratch.
51
00:02:27,026 --> 00:02:28,518
Why can't you do it, Mom?
52
00:02:28,528 --> 00:02:30,086
I can't take another party
53
00:02:30,096 --> 00:02:32,797
with that trio of judgy sitcom moms.
54
00:02:33,967 --> 00:02:35,625
Oh, hi, Lois.
55
00:02:35,635 --> 00:02:38,995
Gosh, I just love how you
always look so comfortable.
56
00:02:39,005 --> 00:02:41,364
I know. Are those pajamas?
57
00:02:41,374 --> 00:02:44,342
And I'm the black one
for unrealistic diversity.
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00:02:49,949 --> 00:02:52,775
I can't believe I have to go
to vocational school.
59
00:02:52,785 --> 00:02:54,477
Does this mean I'm a failure?
60
00:02:54,487 --> 00:02:57,180
No, sweetie.
It means that we're failures.
61
00:02:57,190 --> 00:02:59,882
You know, I'm always at a loss
for words in these moments.
62
00:02:59,892 --> 00:03:01,818
Fred Sanford, you want to do the honors?
63
00:03:01,828 --> 00:03:03,853
Go get 'em, you big dummy.
64
00:03:03,863 --> 00:03:06,556
Um, your show went off the air
40 years ago,
65
00:03:06,566 --> 00:03:08,758
and you died 30 years ago,
66
00:03:08,768 --> 00:03:12,629
so that phrase means very little to me.
67
00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:15,231
I know it's a big step,
honey, but you can do it.
68
00:03:15,241 --> 00:03:17,734
That's right, Chris.
This family's never shied away
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00:03:17,744 --> 00:03:19,902
from a new challenge,
like when I was the spokesman
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00:03:19,912 --> 00:03:22,805
for that perfume, Deschanel Number Five.
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00:03:22,815 --> 00:03:25,041
Precious. Annoying.
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Twee.
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00:03:27,086 --> 00:03:29,854
Hot, but not worth it.
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00:03:30,923 --> 00:03:34,517
Probably a nightmare in person.
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00:03:34,527 --> 00:03:37,186
Deschanel.
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00:03:37,196 --> 00:03:38,888
The fragrance for when you want to smell
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00:03:38,898 --> 00:03:41,691
like a 40-year-old toddler.
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00:03:41,701 --> 00:03:43,459
Can I help you?
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00:03:43,469 --> 00:03:46,763
Yes, I'm here for my first day
of vocational school.
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00:03:46,773 --> 00:03:48,498
Right this way.
81
00:04:19,305 --> 00:04:22,432
This notepad and pencil
is from Mr. Tony over there.
82
00:04:25,244 --> 00:04:27,870
All right, settle down, you yucks.
83
00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:29,972
We got a new student, Chris Griffin.
84
00:04:29,982 --> 00:04:32,141
So everybody give him an "ayy."
85
00:04:32,151 --> 00:04:33,743
Ayy.
86
00:04:33,753 --> 00:04:37,313
Look at that, your first day,
and you got all A's.
87
00:04:37,323 --> 00:04:38,981
Come here, let me pinch your cheek.
88
00:04:38,991 --> 00:04:40,383
Got all A's.
89
00:04:40,393 --> 00:04:43,686
You're expressing
affection and dominance.
90
00:04:43,696 --> 00:04:46,756
Griffin? Where's the "Ucci"
or "Squalotta" at the end?
91
00:04:46,766 --> 00:04:48,057
- You Jewish?
- No.
92
00:04:48,067 --> 00:04:49,258
It true, if you're Jewish,
93
00:04:49,268 --> 00:04:51,060
they cut your dong off with an ax?
94
00:04:51,070 --> 00:04:53,329
My uncle's Jewish.
Friggin' mess, that guy.
95
00:04:53,339 --> 00:04:56,841
Hey, chip-chop, it's 9:30.
Let's start thinking lunch.
96
00:05:00,446 --> 00:05:02,338
We do a nice sit-down thing here.
97
00:05:02,348 --> 00:05:04,107
Little piccata, little veal.
98
00:05:04,117 --> 00:05:06,242
Rocco here learned to cook in the joint.
99
00:05:06,252 --> 00:05:08,911
Okay, everybody dirty up
your hands, we'll eat in ten.
100
00:05:08,921 --> 00:05:12,248
Wow. This is way better than
that barber school I went to
101
00:05:12,258 --> 00:05:14,550
where I couldn't stop pumping the chair.
102
00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:17,386
Just a bit off the top
and shorter on the sides.
103
00:05:17,396 --> 00:05:21,090
We're just gonna be pumping today.
104
00:05:23,236 --> 00:05:25,294
Did you bring the cups?!
105
00:05:25,304 --> 00:05:26,996
Um, uh, no.
106
00:05:27,006 --> 00:05:29,065
My mom didn't say anything about cups.
107
00:05:34,747 --> 00:05:37,573
All right, snack table.
Now, what do we got?
108
00:05:37,583 --> 00:05:40,109
Loose Cheerios, Goldfish crackers,
109
00:05:40,119 --> 00:05:41,911
pretzel sticks, and... ooh.
110
00:05:41,921 --> 00:05:45,181
The siren's song of the
unattended: whole grapes.
111
00:05:45,191 --> 00:05:47,150
Come and eat us
112
00:05:47,160 --> 00:05:48,785
We won't choke you
113
00:05:48,795 --> 00:05:52,655
Put us in your cheeks.
114
00:05:52,665 --> 00:05:54,657
Oh, okay. These grapes seem nice enough.
115
00:05:54,667 --> 00:05:57,093
They said they won't choke me.
116
00:06:01,340 --> 00:06:02,765
You should have sliced us
117
00:06:02,775 --> 00:06:05,468
Skinned us, cut us, now you have no air
118
00:06:05,478 --> 00:06:06,769
Ha-ha-ha.
119
00:06:06,779 --> 00:06:08,671
Oh, my God, Stewie!
120
00:06:08,681 --> 00:06:10,673
You're choking!
121
00:06:10,683 --> 00:06:14,076
Soaring through the air.
122
00:06:16,255 --> 00:06:18,714
Meg. You saved me.
123
00:06:18,724 --> 00:06:21,384
You're... you're my hero.
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00:06:21,394 --> 00:06:23,594
I am not letting you
out of my sight again.
125
00:06:28,968 --> 00:06:30,827
Here I lie
126
00:06:30,837 --> 00:06:32,962
On the ground
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00:06:32,972 --> 00:06:36,199
What of me now?
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00:06:36,209 --> 00:06:39,802
No bowl, no bunch
129
00:06:39,812 --> 00:06:41,370
No stems
130
00:06:41,380 --> 00:06:45,583
But is here where I begin again?
131
00:06:49,355 --> 00:06:55,177
Today I begin the life
that I've dreamed...
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00:06:55,187 --> 00:06:56,953
Uhp, there's a foot.
133
00:07:03,361 --> 00:07:05,120
Coming this fall, from the
134
00:07:05,130 --> 00:07:08,231
makers of Paranormal Activity
comes Normal Activity.
135
00:07:34,092 --> 00:07:35,884
Did you wash your hands?
136
00:07:35,894 --> 00:07:37,919
Yeah.
137
00:07:37,929 --> 00:07:40,488
Meg Griffin, you saved
your brother's life,
138
00:07:40,498 --> 00:07:42,691
so here's your showcase of prizes.
139
00:07:42,701 --> 00:07:45,860
You'll be the talk of the town
with your new macaroni necklace.
140
00:07:45,870 --> 00:07:48,063
That's right, you'll be
strutting down Spooner Street
141
00:07:48,073 --> 00:07:49,898
in this dental floss macaroni necklace
142
00:07:49,908 --> 00:07:52,634
made with Oral-B dental floss
and Pasta Barilla.
143
00:07:52,644 --> 00:07:55,370
Pasta Barilla: a taste of Italy
right in your home.
144
00:07:55,380 --> 00:07:57,339
All right, time for Bethenny Frankel,
145
00:07:57,349 --> 00:08:00,475
America's favorite
chattering pirate skeleton.
146
00:08:00,485 --> 00:08:02,711
Dad! Dad, get off me!
147
00:08:02,721 --> 00:08:04,145
Get off me, Dad!
148
00:08:04,155 --> 00:08:06,047
Hey, hey! Get off my sister!
149
00:08:06,057 --> 00:08:08,450
- Go fly a kite, bub.
- Ouch.
150
00:08:08,460 --> 00:08:10,318
Wow, that book really worked.
151
00:08:10,328 --> 00:08:14,155
His hat's flying off cause
he's been given a what for.
152
00:08:14,165 --> 00:08:16,091
Peter, leave the baby alone.
153
00:08:16,101 --> 00:08:17,959
Why don't you pick on
someone your own size,
154
00:08:17,969 --> 00:08:20,028
like William Howard Taft?
155
00:08:21,439 --> 00:08:23,298
Wow, you're further
in the book than I am.
156
00:08:23,308 --> 00:08:25,934
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'll just go retrieve my hat.
157
00:08:30,081 --> 00:08:31,740
And, Meg, why are you on the couch?
158
00:08:31,750 --> 00:08:33,983
You know you're not
supposed to be on the furniture.
159
00:08:36,154 --> 00:08:39,180
Look at her. She just
sits there and takes it.
160
00:08:39,190 --> 00:08:41,483
She deserves a better life
than this, Brian.
161
00:08:41,493 --> 00:08:43,985
And you know what?
I'm going to give it to her.
162
00:08:43,995 --> 00:08:45,320
How you gonna do that?
163
00:08:45,330 --> 00:08:47,422
I don't know, but it's
going to be a challenge,
164
00:08:47,432 --> 00:08:50,299
like trying to seem sad
while you're wearing flip-flops.
165
00:08:51,670 --> 00:08:54,295
I'm sorry for your loss.
166
00:08:54,305 --> 00:08:55,772
Sorry for your loss.
167
00:08:56,841 --> 00:08:58,767
Sorry for your loss.
168
00:08:58,777 --> 00:09:00,769
Very sorry.
169
00:09:00,779 --> 00:09:02,804
Let me know if you need anything.
170
00:09:02,814 --> 00:09:04,906
- Very sorry.
- Excuse me.
171
00:09:04,916 --> 00:09:06,608
The owner of a Geo Tracker
172
00:09:06,618 --> 00:09:08,677
with the license plate "FLP FLP,"
173
00:09:08,687 --> 00:09:10,712
you're blocking the funeral procession.
174
00:09:10,722 --> 00:09:12,889
Oh.
175
00:09:17,762 --> 00:09:19,220
All right, Chris.
176
00:09:19,230 --> 00:09:22,123
A big part of being a mechanic
is being completely shocked
177
00:09:22,133 --> 00:09:24,359
when somebody hasn't had
a particular item
178
00:09:24,369 --> 00:09:26,394
- on a restaurant menu.
- Hey, Chrissie.
179
00:09:26,404 --> 00:09:27,929
We're thinking about
going over to Pete's.
180
00:09:27,939 --> 00:09:29,497
You want a bread sandwich?
181
00:09:29,507 --> 00:09:31,499
- What's a bread sandwich?
- What?
182
00:09:31,509 --> 00:09:33,535
You never had
a bread sandwich from Pete's?
183
00:09:33,545 --> 00:09:36,404
Everyone who's not currently
in the room, get over here.
184
00:09:36,414 --> 00:09:38,673
Griffin's never had
a Pete's bread sandwich.
185
00:09:38,683 --> 00:09:41,810
Whoa, whoa, what? You never had
a bread sandwich from Pete's?
186
00:09:41,820 --> 00:09:44,179
We've covered this.
Somebody tell me what it is.
187
00:09:44,189 --> 00:09:46,581
What do you think it is?
It's three pieces of bread.
188
00:09:46,591 --> 00:09:48,917
Me, I like a piece of sourdough on top,
189
00:09:48,927 --> 00:09:50,552
piece of sourdough on bottom,
190
00:09:50,562 --> 00:09:53,054
and a nice piece of wheat in the middle.
191
00:09:53,064 --> 00:09:55,557
I like to go rye, rye, rye.
192
00:09:55,567 --> 00:09:56,791
I'm a rye guy.
193
00:09:56,801 --> 00:09:58,226
Hey, you guys going to Pete's?
194
00:09:58,236 --> 00:09:59,961
Someone get me a bread sandwich.
195
00:09:59,971 --> 00:10:01,930
- Griffin's never had one.
- What?
196
00:10:01,940 --> 00:10:03,431
- What?
- Guys.
197
00:10:03,441 --> 00:10:05,800
I just called Pete's.
They're closed forever.
198
00:10:05,810 --> 00:10:07,635
What?
199
00:10:07,645 --> 00:10:09,512
Who answered the phone?
200
00:10:14,185 --> 00:10:16,311
All right, Stewie,
how do we make Meg popular?
201
00:10:16,321 --> 00:10:17,712
I've got it all figured out.
202
00:10:17,722 --> 00:10:19,981
They're posting the cast list
for the school play.
203
00:10:19,991 --> 00:10:21,983
I'll just give Meg all the parts.
204
00:10:21,993 --> 00:10:24,753
That way, she'll be
the most popular girl in school.
205
00:10:24,763 --> 00:10:27,455
Good night, good night.
206
00:10:27,465 --> 00:10:29,858
As sweet repose and rest.
207
00:10:29,868 --> 00:10:33,202
Come to thy heart
as that within my breast.
208
00:10:36,207 --> 00:10:40,235
O, wilt thou leave me so unsatisfied?
209
00:10:43,948 --> 00:10:45,907
What satisfaction
210
00:10:45,917 --> 00:10:48,810
canst thou have tonight?
211
00:10:48,820 --> 00:10:51,346
That son of a bitch.
212
00:10:53,224 --> 00:10:55,617
Th' exchange of thy love's
213
00:10:55,627 --> 00:10:57,952
faithful vow for mine.
214
00:10:57,962 --> 00:10:59,254
'Ello, 'ello, 'ello.
215
00:10:59,264 --> 00:11:00,371
What's all this, then?
216
00:11:06,971 --> 00:11:08,930
- Well, that didn't work.
- Don't worry, Brian.
217
00:11:08,940 --> 00:11:10,965
We've still got the spring musical.
218
00:11:12,844 --> 00:11:14,702
One man likes to push a plow
219
00:11:14,712 --> 00:11:16,638
The other likes to chase a cow
220
00:11:16,648 --> 00:11:19,315
But that's no reason
why they can't be friends
221
00:11:20,652 --> 00:11:22,544
Territory folks should stick together
222
00:11:22,554 --> 00:11:24,412
Territory folks should all be pals
223
00:11:24,422 --> 00:11:26,447
Cowboys dance with farmers' daughters
224
00:11:26,457 --> 00:11:28,391
Farmers dance with the ranchers' gals.
225
00:11:30,929 --> 00:11:32,287
'Ello, 'ello, 'ello.
226
00:11:32,297 --> 00:11:34,389
What's all this, then?
227
00:11:42,207 --> 00:11:43,806
She can't be helped.
228
00:11:47,412 --> 00:11:50,438
Mr. and Mrs. G, thanks so much
for having us over for dinner.
229
00:11:50,448 --> 00:11:51,773
Oh, it's our pleasure.
230
00:11:51,783 --> 00:11:54,142
Chris has said
so many nice things about you.
231
00:11:54,152 --> 00:11:56,010
Ah, maybe one or two of 'em are true.
232
00:11:58,289 --> 00:12:00,648
Chris, tell your mom and dad
about the story you wrote.
233
00:12:00,658 --> 00:12:04,285
- Oh, I don't know.
- Chris, come on, don't be shy.
234
00:12:04,295 --> 00:12:06,788
Okay. It's called "The Black Duck."
235
00:12:06,798 --> 00:12:09,524
"The Black Duck."
You ever seen a black duck?
236
00:12:09,534 --> 00:12:11,392
I seen a brown duck, a yellow duck,
237
00:12:11,402 --> 00:12:12,894
a white duck with a green head.
238
00:12:12,904 --> 00:12:16,164
Hey, there's all kinds of ducks.
This kid thinks of a black one.
239
00:12:16,174 --> 00:12:18,366
Come on, it's just a stupid story, guys.
240
00:12:18,376 --> 00:12:20,535
Hey! If it was such a "stupid story,"
241
00:12:20,545 --> 00:12:23,037
why would it have such
a well-rounded protagonist?
242
00:12:23,047 --> 00:12:25,139
Remember what I told you
behind the garage?
243
00:12:25,149 --> 00:12:26,341
That you might be gay?
244
00:12:26,351 --> 00:12:28,343
Wh-What? No, no, I didn't say that!
245
00:12:28,353 --> 00:12:30,078
The-the imagination on this one.
246
00:12:30,088 --> 00:12:32,113
Black ducks, I'm gay, what's next?
247
00:12:32,123 --> 00:12:34,682
M-Martians?
L-Little green Martian people?
248
00:12:34,692 --> 00:12:38,319
Oh, Chris, I'm so happy you have
so many wonderful new friends.
249
00:12:38,329 --> 00:12:40,722
He was very unpopular in high school.
250
00:12:40,732 --> 00:12:42,190
Oh, yeah, you know, he's strong, too.
251
00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:44,192
He takes care of a lot of stuff for us.
252
00:12:44,202 --> 00:12:45,493
"Stuff"?
253
00:12:45,503 --> 00:12:47,896
Yeah, he-he took care
of one of our competitors.
254
00:12:47,906 --> 00:12:50,331
Mr. Firestone says hello.
255
00:12:50,341 --> 00:12:52,300
Ow. Ow. Ow.
256
00:12:52,310 --> 00:12:54,535
Stop it. Stop it.
257
00:12:54,545 --> 00:12:56,371
Oh, my God, Chris!
258
00:12:56,381 --> 00:12:58,439
That's silly, but it's still murder!
259
00:12:58,449 --> 00:13:00,742
Relax. That Michelin Man had no family.
260
00:13:00,752 --> 00:13:03,386
He came from tires, Ma!
261
00:13:07,158 --> 00:13:09,117
All right, if we can't make Meg popular,
262
00:13:09,127 --> 00:13:11,719
we can at least find her a boyfriend.
263
00:13:11,729 --> 00:13:14,455
Neil, can you come out?
We need to talk to you.
264
00:13:14,465 --> 00:13:17,025
I can't open the door. It's the Sabbath.
265
00:13:17,035 --> 00:13:19,193
You can come around the back entrance.
266
00:13:22,941 --> 00:13:24,732
Why are all the lights off?
267
00:13:24,742 --> 00:13:27,135
I can't turn them on myself.
It's the Sabbath.
268
00:13:27,145 --> 00:13:29,404
Get the lights for me, will you?
269
00:13:29,414 --> 00:13:32,140
Also, can you pick up the phone
and order me a pizza?
270
00:13:32,150 --> 00:13:34,575
I can't do it. It's the Sabbath.
271
00:13:34,585 --> 00:13:36,911
Listen, Neil, we really
wanted to talk about Meg.
272
00:13:36,921 --> 00:13:39,113
That can wait.
I've just looked at some porn,
273
00:13:39,123 --> 00:13:42,150
and I need you guys
to give me some assisted relief.
274
00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:44,986
I can't do it myself. It's the Sabbath.
275
00:13:44,996 --> 00:13:47,555
Okay, this-this is starting
to sound a little weird.
276
00:13:47,565 --> 00:13:49,732
It's not weird. It's Jewish.
277
00:13:52,737 --> 00:13:55,863
I can't believe we did all that
and he still turned us down.
278
00:13:55,873 --> 00:13:59,141
I know, and Al-also, Brian,
it's Thursday.
279
00:14:01,746 --> 00:14:03,838
Well, I am officially out of ideas.
280
00:14:03,848 --> 00:14:05,707
Yes, there's literally no one in town
281
00:14:05,717 --> 00:14:08,209
sad and desperate enough
to date my sister.
282
00:14:08,219 --> 00:14:11,079
Hey, guys, can you hold my phone
and point it over this way?
283
00:14:11,089 --> 00:14:13,014
I want to live-stream my suicide.
284
00:14:13,024 --> 00:14:14,315
Yeah, sure, Kevin.
285
00:14:14,325 --> 00:14:16,417
You know what it is, Stewie?
It's a selfishness
286
00:14:16,427 --> 00:14:18,052
It's an inability to look out
287
00:14:18,062 --> 00:14:19,954
and see someone who needs someone.
288
00:14:19,964 --> 00:14:21,389
It's-it's just...
it's a lack of empathy.
289
00:14:21,399 --> 00:14:23,124
Can you make sure
I'm totally in the frame?
290
00:14:23,134 --> 00:14:24,993
Yeah, I'm not a pro.
You get what you get.
291
00:14:25,003 --> 00:14:26,761
Anyway, what is wrong
with people that they're
292
00:14:26,771 --> 00:14:29,931
so myopic and just preoccupied
with their own little lives?
293
00:14:29,941 --> 00:14:31,300
- Is it on?
- It's whatever
294
00:14:31,310 --> 00:14:32,642
it was when you handed it to me.
295
00:14:32,643 --> 00:14:34,736
The point is, there's someone
out there for everyone
296
00:14:34,746 --> 00:14:37,105
if they're just willing
to open their eyes and look.
297
00:14:37,115 --> 00:14:39,607
Wait a second! Don't you see, Brian?
298
00:14:39,617 --> 00:14:41,576
Oh, my God, you're right!
299
00:14:41,586 --> 00:14:43,811
Kevin, before you go through with this,
300
00:14:43,821 --> 00:14:46,014
would you consider
taking Meg out for a date?
301
00:14:46,024 --> 00:14:47,782
Meg? Why?
302
00:14:47,792 --> 00:14:49,617
Look, we know you've had a hard road
303
00:14:49,627 --> 00:14:51,352
ever since you came home from Iraq.
304
00:14:51,362 --> 00:14:53,788
Well, this could be a chance
for you to help someone else
305
00:14:53,798 --> 00:14:55,898
who maybe feels as bad inside as you do.
306
00:14:57,902 --> 00:14:59,827
Okay. I'll ask her out.
307
00:14:59,837 --> 00:15:01,462
Great. Call her tomorrow.
308
00:15:01,472 --> 00:15:02,964
Tonight she's doing the fall play.
309
00:15:02,974 --> 00:15:05,366
It's a one-woman performance of Hair.
310
00:15:07,412 --> 00:15:11,372
Let the sunshine
311
00:15:11,382 --> 00:15:14,909
Let the sunshine in
312
00:15:14,919 --> 00:15:19,480
Let the sun... shine in.
313
00:15:19,490 --> 00:15:21,524
Should've called it Too Much Hair.
314
00:15:22,971 --> 00:15:24,900
I finished the book.
315
00:15:32,441 --> 00:15:33,899
All right, Brian. Here comes Meg.
316
00:15:33,909 --> 00:15:35,835
Now, don't let on
that we had anything to do
317
00:15:35,845 --> 00:15:37,069
with Kevin asking her out.
318
00:15:37,079 --> 00:15:38,771
Relax. I know how to keep my cool.
319
00:15:38,781 --> 00:15:39,972
You guys!
320
00:15:39,982 --> 00:15:42,074
I'm going out with Kevin Swanson!
321
00:15:42,084 --> 00:15:44,043
Get out of here!
322
00:15:44,053 --> 00:15:46,011
Brian, why are your hands on your hips?
323
00:15:46,021 --> 00:15:47,246
Turn it down a notch.
324
00:15:47,256 --> 00:15:50,449
Yeah, he asked me out.
Totally out of the blue.
325
00:15:50,459 --> 00:15:52,218
Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle.
326
00:15:52,228 --> 00:15:54,628
Get your hand off your cheek, you mess.
327
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:00,226
Principal Shepherd, we came to ask
328
00:16:00,236 --> 00:16:03,462
if there's anything we can do
to get Chris back in the school.
329
00:16:03,472 --> 00:16:06,298
Mr. and Mrs. Griffin,
I-I'm afraid we can't do that.
330
00:16:06,308 --> 00:16:08,601
Oh, I think you can.
331
00:16:08,611 --> 00:16:11,411
I think you can do that
and a whole lot more.
332
00:16:12,481 --> 00:16:13,973
Oh, my God.
333
00:16:13,983 --> 00:16:16,675
That is not what a testicle
is supposed to look like.
334
00:16:16,685 --> 00:16:18,043
Has a doctor seen this?
335
00:16:18,053 --> 00:16:20,713
What are you gonna do,
charge me with smoking?
336
00:16:20,723 --> 00:16:23,282
Mr. Griffin, I'm afraid
you have testicular cancer.
337
00:16:23,292 --> 00:16:25,084
I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do.
338
00:16:25,094 --> 00:16:27,461
Oh, I think maybe there is.
339
00:16:28,797 --> 00:16:31,098
If you keep doing that,
you're gonna pop it.
340
00:16:34,270 --> 00:16:36,829
Stewie, I still don't understand
why we have to pretend
341
00:16:36,839 --> 00:16:38,063
to work at the restaurant.
342
00:16:38,073 --> 00:16:39,632
It's all part of the plan, Brian.
343
00:16:39,642 --> 00:16:41,934
Meg and Kevin need to have
the perfect date.
344
00:16:41,944 --> 00:16:44,470
That's why I gave the rest
of the staff the night off.
345
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,672
We have to be in total control
of the evening.
346
00:16:46,682 --> 00:16:48,174
Two for Swanson.
347
00:16:48,184 --> 00:16:50,576
I'm sorry,
we have nothing under that name,
348
00:16:50,586 --> 00:16:52,511
- and we're all full.
- Oh, I...
349
00:16:52,521 --> 00:16:54,480
Uh, actually, I think
a table just opened up.
350
00:16:54,490 --> 00:16:56,089
Right this way.
351
00:16:57,126 --> 00:16:59,552
- What the hell?
- Sorry, I choked.
352
00:16:59,562 --> 00:17:01,887
Hi. We're the Hollender
rehearsal dinner.
353
00:17:01,897 --> 00:17:03,989
There are 46 of us.
354
00:17:03,999 --> 00:17:06,358
Uh, Stewie, before you gave
the staff the night off,
355
00:17:06,368 --> 00:17:07,860
did you check the reservation book?
356
00:17:07,870 --> 00:17:09,128
I did not.
357
00:17:09,138 --> 00:17:11,997
And to remind you,
24 of us selected the salmon,
358
00:17:12,007 --> 00:17:14,700
16 the filet, and six vegetarian.
359
00:17:14,710 --> 00:17:15,968
One vegan.
360
00:17:15,978 --> 00:17:18,604
Five vegetarian, one vegan.
361
00:17:18,614 --> 00:17:20,472
- What do we do?
- Just keep giving them crayons
362
00:17:20,482 --> 00:17:22,107
until we figure it out.
363
00:17:22,117 --> 00:17:23,542
More appetizer?
364
00:17:23,552 --> 00:17:25,044
No, thanks.
365
00:17:25,054 --> 00:17:27,688
Cauliflower gives me the scoots.
366
00:17:31,060 --> 00:17:33,285
Chris, there's something
your father and I
367
00:17:33,295 --> 00:17:35,221
want to talk to you about.
368
00:17:35,231 --> 00:17:37,723
Uh, Chris? Ch-Chris?
369
00:17:37,733 --> 00:17:40,326
Sorry, I only answer to "Chrissie" now.
370
00:17:40,336 --> 00:17:43,095
- Fine. Chrissie?
- Yeah, Ma?
371
00:17:43,105 --> 00:17:47,233
Can you stop lifting your rusty
weights while we talk to you?
372
00:17:47,243 --> 00:17:50,135
Chris, we're worried
about you and your new friends.
373
00:17:50,145 --> 00:17:52,571
Pa, don't worry about it.
374
00:17:52,581 --> 00:17:54,840
"Don't worry about it."
375
00:17:54,850 --> 00:17:57,576
- Okay.
- No, Peter, it's not okay.
376
00:17:57,586 --> 00:18:00,813
Chris, we don't want you in the Mafia.
377
00:18:00,823 --> 00:18:03,549
Hey, I'm in waste management.
378
00:18:03,559 --> 00:18:06,719
Chris, you need to be back in
high school where you belong.
379
00:18:06,729 --> 00:18:08,787
But Principal Shepherd
won't let you back in,
380
00:18:08,797 --> 00:18:10,656
and we don't know what to do.
381
00:18:10,666 --> 00:18:13,993
What do I need school for?
Tony Danza never went to school,
382
00:18:14,003 --> 00:18:17,830
and he played a guy named Tony
on four different TV shows.
383
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:19,031
Lois, let me handle this.
384
00:18:19,041 --> 00:18:20,766
Chris, I'm gonna say this in a way
385
00:18:20,776 --> 00:18:23,369
an Italian mechanic would understand.
386
00:18:23,379 --> 00:18:25,104
You're breaking your mother's heart!
387
00:18:25,114 --> 00:18:28,140
Ma! Why didn't you say so, Ma?!
388
00:18:28,150 --> 00:18:30,350
I'll take care of it.
389
00:19:21,170 --> 00:19:22,428
What have you got there?
390
00:19:22,438 --> 00:19:24,430
A guy letting me back
into school says what?
391
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:27,641
- What? Damn it!
- Okay, see you on Monday.
392
00:19:34,083 --> 00:19:35,941
- Oh, God.
- What? What is it?
393
00:19:35,951 --> 00:19:38,711
The Hollender rehearsal dinner
review on Yelp.
394
00:19:38,721 --> 00:19:41,080
"Undercooked and underwhelmed.
395
00:19:41,090 --> 00:19:42,715
Argumentative staff."
396
00:19:42,725 --> 00:19:45,951
I thought chicken sushi
was wildly inventive.
397
00:19:45,961 --> 00:19:48,520
So, Meg, how was your night out
with your boyfriend?
398
00:19:48,530 --> 00:19:51,123
- Actually, we broke up.
- Aw.
399
00:19:51,133 --> 00:19:52,825
Aw, Meg, I'm so sorry.
400
00:19:52,835 --> 00:19:54,560
Well, I guess some people are just
401
00:19:54,570 --> 00:19:56,028
meant to be alone, you know?
402
00:19:56,038 --> 00:19:57,996
They're so broken inside.
403
00:19:58,006 --> 00:20:00,332
They're just not worth it.
404
00:20:00,342 --> 00:20:02,634
Don't say that, Meg.
You're totally worth it.
405
00:20:02,644 --> 00:20:05,637
I'm not talking about me.
I'm talking about Kevin.
406
00:20:05,647 --> 00:20:08,040
He's a psycho. I dumped his ass.
407
00:20:08,050 --> 00:20:10,142
So... you're okay with it?
408
00:20:10,152 --> 00:20:14,012
Yeah, it actually felt great
to be empowered for once.
409
00:20:14,022 --> 00:20:16,248
Good night, guys.
410
00:20:16,258 --> 00:20:18,350
You know what, Brian, we actually did
411
00:20:18,360 --> 00:20:20,652
make Meg's life a little bit better.
412
00:20:20,662 --> 00:20:22,054
She got to dump someone.
413
00:20:22,064 --> 00:20:24,289
Well, you know what
the real lesson is here, Stewie.
414
00:20:24,299 --> 00:20:26,392
Brian, I'm being told
the show is running long.
415
00:20:26,402 --> 00:20:28,127
- We've got to speed this up.
- Oh, that's okay.
416
00:20:28,137 --> 00:20:30,295
I'm sure they can fix it
in editing. What I was saying...
417
00:20:30,305 --> 00:20:32,197
Because it's all about family and...
418
00:20:32,207 --> 00:20:34,032
In love. You see, the thing is...
419
00:20:34,042 --> 00:20:36,821
- Love you, Brian.
- Tractor guy now! Who wants a ri...
420
00:20:42,017 --> 00:20:44,610
So, Chris, how was
your first day back at school?
421
00:20:44,620 --> 00:20:47,980
It was fine. I'll miss the guys
at vocational school,
422
00:20:47,990 --> 00:20:50,616
but it is nice
to be back where I belong.
423
00:20:50,626 --> 00:20:52,492
I'll get it.
424
00:20:53,562 --> 00:20:54,753
That's him.
425
00:20:54,763 --> 00:20:56,322
That's the one who popped me.
426
00:20:56,332 --> 00:20:58,991
- Are you sure?
- Yes, I'm sure.
427
00:20:59,001 --> 00:21:01,193
Did I not sound sure?
428
00:21:01,203 --> 00:21:04,224
- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
-- www.addic7ed.com --
32395
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