All language subtitles for Nothing.Compares.2022.1080p.SHO.WEB-DL.DD5.1.H.264-SMOLDOC

- All right.
- I gotta tell you,

I'm real proud to introduce
this next artist

whose name's become synonymous

with courage and integrity.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Sin�ad O'Connor.

Thank you.

I didn't mean to be strong.

I wasn't thinking to myself,
I must be strong.

I didn't know I was strong.

I did suffer through a lot
because everybody felt

it was okay to kick
the shit out of me.

I regret that I was
so sad because of it.

I regret that I spent
so many years

very lonely and isolated,
really.

Ran down And the lady said it

Got torn down
And the priest just said it

Got burned down, ooh

They give me five years
Ooh, five years

It's my turn

Oh, oh, Jerusalem

Oh, oh, Jerusalem

There was no therapy
when I was growing up.

So the reason I got into
music group was therapy,

which is why it was
such a shock for me

to become a pop star,
it's not what I wanted.

I just wanted to scream.

Everybody in music has a story
in terms of their upbringing

or where they came from
or what they went through.

There's something they need
to get off their chest,

and perhaps we all need
a bit of love and affection

that we didn't get anywhere else

but we get by making music.

Come on over there and sit down.

They're all, they're all
looking at you, Sin�ad,

out there in television land.

They're saying "Mother of God,

what did she do with her head?

Isn't that a disgrace?

I hope my daughter
wouldn't turn out like that."

- Isn't that what you're saying?
- Yes, you are.

- Already, you are.
- How are you then?

- I'm fine, thank you. How are you?
- Well done so far.

Now from Glenageary,
you were a difficult child,

Sin�ad O'Connor,
you were difficult growing up.

You went through a lot
of schools, did you not?

I think quite a few,
at the expense of my father.

How many schools
did you go through and why?

Um... I think, I don't know
how many, Dad? About five.

Five or six.

How many schools
did she go through?

- I'd say no more than five or six.
- - Five or six.

That's a bit
exaggerated actually.

That's in one year, of course.

And for me

Some scarlet ribbons

Scarlet ribbons

For my hair...

My very first musical memory

is my father singing to me,
"Scarlet Ribbons".

I just remember
being blown away.

Like I remember like yesterday
I was lying on my pillow

and my dad would
sing the song to me

and I was like, "Oh, my God."

The angels came in the window.

...all the streets were dark.

When I'm 11, my brother comes
home with " Slow Train Coming,"

which completely changes my life

and makes me want
to be a musician,

and makes me
want to be an artist,

and makes me know what
kind of artist I want to be

because of the song
"Gotta Serve Somebody."

And I was obsessed
with Bob Dylan from then on.

My mother had this
fantastic record collection

which she would spread out
on the dining room table

every morning
like a deck of cards.

Her musical tastes
ranged from John Lennon

right through awful kind of
HMS Pinafore, Light Opera,

right through to, like,
Porgy and Bess.

And also in those days,
musicals were huge.

That was all that
was ever on telly,

was these just high class
musicals, you know.

My mother always had
the soundtracks to them.

My father was into cello,

which I used to find just too
sad, given our circumstances.

My parents separated
when I was quite young,

and my mother
was a very violent woman,

not a healthy woman
mentally at all.

And she was physically

and verbally
and psychologically,

spiritually and
emotionally abusive.

My mother was a beast,

and I was able to soothe her
with my voice,

I was able to use my voice
to make the devil fall asleep.

My father is the type
of man that didn't want

anyone talking
about what happened,

and that's what
was wrong with me.

It wasn't talked about,
even in the family.

The cause of my own abuse
was the church's effect

on this country,
which had produced my mother.

I spent my entire childhood
being beaten up

because of the social conditions

under which my mother grew up

and under which
her mother grew up

and under which her mother
and her mother grew up.

I would compare Ireland
to an abused child.

I'd a terrible

Broken heart

I'd a terrible

Broken heart...

I began studying scriptures

when I was very small,

because I wanted to see
what was in this book

that they were using
to oppress my people.

Why were my grandparents
so miserable

that they couldn't have a kiss

without feeling like they
were going to burn in hell?

The church
influenced everything.

If it was a sin, then it was
against the law of the state.

So divorce, contraception,

and anything that
didn't agree entirely

with a very narrow view
of the Catholic church,

it was simply not allowed.

It affected
every level of society.

It was a mortal sin,
for example,

to go to a dance
in some diocese,

that didn't end at midnight.

It was a mortal sin
to eat meat on a Friday.

You could go to hell for
eating a sausage on a Friday.

Everything was gathered around

the power of the church
over its people.

I had loved the Catholic church,

and I had grown up so religious,

like stupidly religious.

I made my holy communion
and I took it seriously.

That was a contract
with the holy spirit I made,

and I believed it all,
and I was trying to live it.

I went into care when I was 14,

into care home for want
of a better description.

I was a bit messed up.

And it wasn't acknowledged

what had happened to me
in my mother's house.

I was unmanageable, really,
so they didn't want me at home.

The place was called "An Grianan",
which means "The Sunrise."

An Grianan was
a residential training centre

run by a religious order,
by sisters.

The girls came
from mixed backgrounds.

Some had come from
other children's homes,

have been in care
all their lives.

Others had come from
insecure family settings

and they needed somewhere
where there was structure

and safety for a few years.

They got a guitar teacher in

who was the loveliest
woman alive,

who I still know and
I still talk to now and then.

She's bloody lovely.

If not for her, I wouldn't have
made it through that place.

The first night, I was there

doing music with the girls,

I asked her, would she like
to sing a song for us.

And I won't forget it
as long as I live,

because we were just stunned.

We needed to encourage her
in this wonderful talent.

Ooh, I'm freezing!

When we decided to get married,

I asked Sin�ad then
to do the solo.

And she sang "Evergreen,"
which was my favourite song.

One love

Ageless and ever

Evergreen

The emotion of the song

almost brought people to tears.

- It was stunning.
- It was absolutely stunning.

In the congregation
was her brother, Paul Byrne,

and then he was forming
this band called In Tua Nua.

We were searching for a singer.

So when I heard this voice,
it stopped me in my tracks.

After chatting with Sin�ad
on the steps of the church,

I'd arranged to go up
and see her at An Grianan.

We gave her a tape
and she phoned the next day.

She had the lyrics
and the melody done.

So we went back up the
next night and she sang it to us,

and it was spectacular.

We had to book a couple of
hours on a Wednesday afternoon

because Sin�ad got a half day
from school on a Wednesday.

Picked her up, did two hours
of vocals with her,

and then had her back before
the nuns noticed she was missing.

So the first song that I wrote,

which became their first single,
was called "Take My Hand."

It was a result
of the punishment

the nun meted out to me one day,

the nun, she could
be terribly kind,

but she could also be
terribly cruel as well.

Where I was, was attached
to a Magdalene Laundry.

She sent me to sleep in the
hospice part of the laundry

as punishment a couple of times,

to remind me that
if I didn't behave myself,

I was going to end up
like these women.

When I went up, there was
no staff there with the ladies.

There was never
any nuns or nurses.

And the poor ancient ladies
who were the Magdalene girls

were lying in their beds
calling out for nurses all night

that never came, it was awful.

I didn't know what to do,
and obviously, I was terrified.

Take my hand

These women,

we're now talking
about the early '80s,

some of them have been
there from the 1920s.

These women, who through
no fault of their own,

had just been put in
by the courts and by men.

Very often the cases were
they had been raped

by maybe the local priest,
the doctor, the father,

or some pillar of society.

They had to pay the price

and were locked away
for their whole lives.

The whole of Ireland
talks about these ladies,

but I met them, I met them
at their most vulnerable.

These people convinced my
father that they could help me

with whatever
behavioural issues I had

as a result of what had
happened to me growing up.

But they didn't, they just
shut the door in his face

when he dropped me there,
they took his money.

The problems were compounded.

We all were walking around
thinking we were terrible people

that didn't deserve to live.

My father, I'm sure
the world would acknowledge,

deserves a refund.

Young woman
With a drink in her hand

She liked to listen
To rock and roll

She moves with the music

'Cause it never gets old

Sin�ad and I met when we were

both around 18 years old.

We were very close
for a number of years

until life kind of took us
in different directions.

She really wanted
to be doing her music.

I think she really knew
what she wanted to do,

but I don't quite know
if she knew

what path it would take her on.

I put an ad
in Hot Press magazine

that I was a singer and
I wanted to find a band to join.

And I remember going
into these suburban houses,

doing auditions for these
various different bands.

Eventually I ended up meeting
this dude called Colm Farrelly

who was
putting together this band.

Ton Ton Macoute, so I became
the singer in that band.

I had a job at the Bad Ass Cafe
on Crown Alley,

and we used to rehearse
right across the road from it.

We did nothing
but rehearse live,

which is why I love
live performing.

And every rehearsal
was like a gig.

Nigel Grainge and Chris Hill
came over to Dublin

to see us, Ton Ton Macoute.

About six months later,
my mother unfortunately died,

very selfishly.

Months after that, I get a
phone call from Chris and Nigel.

He said, "Well,
why don't you come to London

and do some demos?"

For five long years

I thought you were my man

But I found out

I'm just a link
In your chain

You got me
Where you want me

I ain't nothin'
But your fool

You treated me mean

Oh, you treated me cruel

I worked with Sin�ad
from her arrival in London

through to the development
of and the recording

of her first album,
"Lion and the Cobra."

Our job as a sort of group
of musicians from the outset

was to help her
to find her feet.

She'd already found her voice,

but she wanted to find
the sort of musical clothing

that she wanted to wrap
around that amazing voice.

What's it called?

Um, we haven't got
a name for it yet.

So we went into
a rehearsal studio in Putney

and started to routine the songs

and get used to the dynamics
and arrangements.

It makes a big difference
if you can go in

and rehearse for a long time.

Nigel Grange was the head
of Ensign at the time.

He was quite used to putting
people into a position

of being able to work
for long periods.

So he's a kind of nurturer.

I'm just as guilty as you

I'm just as ashamed as you

The first time
I heard Sin�ad's voice,

it's just unbelievable.

It was jumping octaves

and going from whisper
to scream in half a second.

I mean, it was just amazing,

a young kid from Dublin,
you know.

And

I'm just as guilty as you

You often hear artists saying

that they're
channelling something.

I think actually
you're channelling yourself.

Your subconscious
is talking to you.

I just had these songs inside me

that had to come out.

They were very, very personal

and they were
sort of cathartic, really.

There were kind of songs
to help her, to heal her.

In some respects,
I think the band that we were,

the band of musicians
who were around her,

were something of
a family for her.

We were safe.

Fachtna O'Ceallaigh had been
Boomtown Rats' manager

and had run U2's label.

He came over to London
and became Sin�ad's manager.

I had a great time
hanging out with Fachtna,

and Fachtna used to bring me
to Portobello Road on Saturdays,

where he had
his friend Lepkey, and Leroy.

He used to have
the Dread Broadcasting Company

and they had the open mics.

Bearing in mind I'm Irish

and I've come
from the theocracy,

and these guys were coming along

roaring about the Pope
is the devil,

and fucking burn the Vatican
and all this stuff,

so that was like,
"Oh, my God, I'm home."

I couldn't believe it.

I fell in love with
Rasta at that point.

Love to everyone. You're back
in tune to The Rankin' Miss P,

on DBC, the Dread
Broadcasting Corporation,

103.8 every Friday.

We're electric, y'all.

She was really shy

and she was living down
in east London with her auntie.

She didn't know anyone,
and so we just hung out.

We did a lot of driving
around London, you know,

with the stereo on, just having
a great time actually,

just being kids, to be honest.

Ensign wanted Sin�ad
to be a musical commodity.

They wanted me
to grow the hair long

and wear short skirts
and high heels,

makeup and the whole works,

write songs that wouldn't
challenge anything.

But then I come
from a country where

there used to be riots
in the streets over plays.

That's what art is for.

That led to her deciding
to shave off all her hair.

At the time, I was
her closest female friend.

I think... I went
to see some friends,

and when I got back to her flat,

she wouldn't open the door.

She just said,
"I can't, I can't.

You got to look
through the letter box,

I've done something
and you're going to kill me."

I looked through the letterbox
and there she was

with a completely shaved head.

The label were
trying to brand Sin�ad

with those really obvious
generic female labels.

Obviously she was having
absolutely none of it.

You just looked at
somebody and went,

"We know now what
we're dealing with."

It's a powerful statement
for a woman because she says,

"Don't fuck with me."

Me and John
were friends for a year

before, you know, we ever
went out with each other.

We were both going out with
different people and everything.

And then we just kind
of drifted into it,

and then within a month
I was pregnant.

The record companies in
those days had their own doctors

that they sent you to.

The doctor announces that
the record company have spent

a hundred thousand pounds
making your record,

you owe it to them
not to have this baby.

Ensign tried to dissuade her

from carrying on the pregnancy
and giving birth to Jake,

and thankfully, she
obviously stood her ground,

but they did put pressure on
her to terminate the pregnancy.

That was the final straw for me.

I was sick of the
fuckin' record anyway.

I hated the fuckin' record.

There was a big fallout.

Fachtna O'Ceallaigh
was working very hard

to persuade the label
to just give her scope,

to just change tack.

Basically they said,
"Have a go."

In my part,
it was a response to them

telling me I owe it to them
to not have my baby.

And I was like,
"well, it ain't worth it

for a shit fuckin' record."

I just knew that I didn't
want any man telling me

who I could be or what I could
be or what to sound like.

I came from
a patriarchal country

where I'm being told
everything I can and can't do

because I'm a girl.

I figured, well, if I didn't
take it from the system

and I didn't take
it from my daddy,

I ain't taking it
from anybody else.

Can I do two?

The whole of
"The Lion and the Cobra"

was completely scrapped
and we started again.

That was a really important
turning point in that record.

The second version was fresher,
younger, and spontaneous.

Put your hands on me

Put 'em on, put 'em on
Put 'em on me

Hands, gimme love

Hands, gimme those

I want your

Gimme, yes

Gimme this

When we got
the first album cover,

I was frozen like a rabbit
in the headlights

getting my picture taken.

Put on the album and got me
to scream along with the album.

So that's why
there's the picture of me

looks like I'm screaming,

which they wouldn't
use in America

because it was too
aggressive-looking

as far as they were concerned.

I didn't realize
that they'd have to do

a different one for America.

It was only when it came out
and I thought,

"Yeah, of course
they couldn't have

a picture of her screaming."

You know, that would
scare too many people.

I had to photograph
her for the cover

from the shoulders up

because the record company
didn't want to see her pregnant.

Once we had got the pictures

that we knew
the record company needed,

we just did what we wanted.

It was, you know,
a joy to photograph

this little girl with her
bald head and her big belly,

amazing looking.

I think her image
screamed more than feminism,

beyond feminism at the time.

I think it was just
like non-binary,

incredible intersectional
feminist attitude.

Her fashion sense was like
35 years ahead of the time.

People found it
problematic just because

they read the language of
skinhead into the shaved head.

It suggested some
kind of aggression,

but actually the beauty
of her features,

the quality of her eyes,

it created a fantastic
contradiction.

As a filmmaker, gave me
a very graphic, powerful image

from the get-go.

Anytime I worked
with John Maybury,

it was amazing 'cos he came with

a whole gang of glorious queens.

The set makers, stylists,
the makeup people, you know,

and they like
genuinely adored me.

I felt so safe and looked after.

I felt like I had like
a hundred daddies.

You do

Something to me

She recognized
in us kind of a sense of

some kind of kindred spirit,
but there was no judgement.

There was no critiquing
in any kind of personal terms.

And she was free to be who
she wanted to be within that

because everyone else was free
to be who they wanted to be.

I had never, until I went
to London, seen gay people.

They were so inspiring
and still are to me,

especially the ones that
were dressing like women.

You couldn't do that in Ireland.

You'd have the shit kicked
out of you, you know?

Let me live 'neath your spell

Do do that voodoo

That you do so well

For you do

Something to me

That nobody else

Can do

That nobody else

Can do

Why I like performing
and why I like singing loud

and stuff like that is because

I am quietly spoken
and quite withdrawn...

and into myself, and in
my, sort of, normal life,

so it's quite a release to climb
on the stage and scream for an hour.

At the end of my day

Nothing would

Nothing would
Please me better

Than I find that you're there
When I wake

Just like you
Said it would be

Just like you
Said it would be

Just like you
Said it would be

Just like you
Said it would be

Will you be my lover?

Will you be my mama?

I said will you my my mama?

There are a lot
of songs that I've written

about my mother's death
or in response to her death.

And " Troy," I think
was the first one.

It's also the first song
I've wrote

where I'm telling anybody
about anything that's happened.

I'll remember it

Dublin in a rainstorm

And sitting
In the long grass in summer

Keeping warm...

One of the very traumatic things

that happened to me growing up,

was that my mother
had me living in the garden.

So once when I was
eight-and-a-half,

I lived in the garden
24/7 for a week or two.

I'm talking in that song
about that experience,

the whole thing of sitting
in the long grass in summer

trying to keep warm.

So I'm out in the garden
in the fucking dark

and when it's coming to dusk
and I still hate dusk

to this day, I don't mind
if it's day or night,

but dusk, I don't like.

And I'd be looking up
at the only window

at the side of the house
where she'd have a light on

and I'd be screaming,
begging her to let me in.

And she wouldn't let me in,
the light would go off,

the house go dark.

Every other song I'm writing
is about somebody else

or from the point of view
of somebody else.

"Troy" is the first song
I've written about me.

It's not a song,
it's a fucking testament.

And you should've
Left the light on

You should've
Left the light on

Then I wouldn't have tried
You'd never have known

And I wouldn't have
Pulled you tighter

No, I wouldn't have
Pulled you close

I wouldn't have screamed

No, I can't let you go

If the door wasn't closed

No, I wouldn't have
Pulled you to me

No, I wouldn't have kissed
Your face

You wouldn't have
Begged me to hold you

If we hadn't been there
In the first place

Oh, but I know you
Wanted me to be there

Oh, oh

Every look
That you threw told me so

"Troy" is not safe.

I don't need
to dig that up again.

It's like trauma therapy.

There would've been
no point writing

and/or going around
the world screaming "Troy"

into microphones, if there
wasn't going to come a day,

one day that I didn't
need to do that anymore.

Make no difference
What you say

You're still a liar

You're still a liar

You're still a liar

Sin�ad was pregnant
all through the making

of "The Lion and the Cobra"

And I think in many
ways, actually,

it was quite grounding
to have a baby very young.

In some way, I think it
probably kept us sane.

There's nothing more deep
and real than a baby.

And there's nothing more
fake and unimportant

than fame, really.

Dana Dane making her first
appearance on Top of the Pops.

Here's another lady making
her first appearance.

She's got an excellent
new album out at the moment

called "The Lion and the Cobra",

and a single Mandinka
at 22 in the charts.

This is Sin�ad O'Connor.

I remember watching

Sin�ad on Top of the Pops.

It's just seemed quite
surreal to be honest,

because she was just my friend,

but she was this other person
in other people's eyes.

I'm dancing the seven veils

Want you to pick up
My scarf

See how
The black moon fades

Soon I can give you
My heart

I don't know no shame

I feel no pain

I can't see the flame

But I do know Mandinka

I do know Mandinka

I do know Mandinka

I do

When "Mandinka" was released,

it just jumps out of the
radio, it was one of those songs.

Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh

I do, oh, oh, oh

I said I do

I swear I do...

You know, it was almost
like she had always been there

once she came on the scene
because you really

couldn't imagine your life
without her at that point.

I do Mandinka...

I heard "Mandinka"
at a club in Boulder, Colorado.

I just remember hearing
the voice and it's nothing

other than something
that stops you in your tracks.

Soon I can give
You my heart...

I hear that voice
and I feel comforted.

And that first album, like,

the entire thing
was just stunning.

Telling me he'd be home

Sailed the seas
For a hundred years

Leaving me all alone

"The Lion and the Cobra"
was an amazing album

just because there
was no filler on it.

So as a critic, you know,
that was one of the first things

that drew me to it.

She also has a very
singular voice and perspective

and very strong
personality-wise.

To me, it was like
the whole package.

I remember the day
The young man came

He said, "Your Jackie's gone
We got lost in the rain"

And I ran to the beach

And laid me down...

The thing about
"The Lion and the Cobra" is,

you don't get that as
a debut album every day.

Those things come
like once in a lifetime.

Like the back of his hand

He'll be back sometime

Laughing at you...

And many times
in your performances,

there's an intensity, almost
a rage burning inside of you.

Where does that come from?

You're a small, demure,
quiet sort of person.

I don't know.

Perhaps there's something
twisted about me

that I haven't realized yet.

You've also said that
non-traditional Irish musicians

seem to have to leave
Ireland to make it.

If you're a woman
in particular, and unless

you're very sort of timid
and you want to make

nice Irish music,
which I respect and everything,

life can be very difficult
for you because people

can't actually handle a woman
doing anything different.

When I leave Ireland,
it's virtually unheard of

for a woman to be
making her own living

and independent of men.

The Irish fucking constitution
still contains the wording

that a woman's place
is in the home.

So I was very lucky, from 1985
I was making my own living.

So many people in this country,
women in particular,

had to say no when they wanted
to say yes to themselves,

or be open about their anger.

At that time in Ireland, women
weren't allowed to be angry.

And I think that might've
been hard for some of them

because, you know,
they had spent their whole life

saying no to themselves.

Tonight, the Grammy
awards are presenting

best rock vocal
performance female.

Our first performer
is 21 years old,

comes from Ireland
and with her very first album,

"The Lion and the Cobra",
she has served notice

that this is no ordinary talent.

Ladies and gentlemen,
please meet Sin�ad O'Connor.

I'm dancing the seven veils

Want you to pick up
My scarf

See how
The black moon fades

Soon I can
Give you my heart...

I remember talking to
her the next day and she said,

"Oh, my God, I went
on stage and Stevie Wonder

was sitting in the front row."

And we were
Stevie Wonder freaks.

So this was quite a leap,
you know.

I don't know no shame

I feel no pain

I can't see the flame

But I do know Man-din-ka

You know,
you're there and you're looking

at all these people that
you've watched on the television

and there's people like
Quincy Jones and Stevie Wonder

and I was just like...

I do know Mandinka...

As I sang Mandinka,
I had "Jake's baby girl"

on the back of my pants and
I had Public Enemy logo painted

into the side of my head.

They decided they
wouldn't go to the Grammy's

quite rightly because
they were protesting.

I protested the Grammy's in 1989

because they refused
to recognize

rap music and hip-hop

as a legitimate
musical category.

I thought it was like admirable

when she put the Public
Enemy logo on her head.

With Sin�ad O'Connor,
you didn't get the sense

that she was
just being pretentious,

that she was fake.

It was like, yeah,

she seriously
has issues with this.

This is what's going
to drive her artistry,

she's committed to that.

It was a brilliant performance.

At that point, she was
the darling of everyone.

In one way, I loved it.

Obviously I was
a very young woman

and you kind of fantasize
about being famous.

In another way,
I was frightened by it.

What maybe was difficult
for me was the timing

of the success thing,
it meant that I suddenly had

this identity and I didn't
feel like it was really me.

To be honest, I also had
very little self-esteem.

I couldn't understand why
anyone liked my records.

Let me tell you
how stupid I am. Um...

Okay.

We were sitting here
doing this interview

and I had accepted the fact
that your head was shaved

and didn't even think
about it very much.

Well, that's good, that means
we don't have to talk about it.

I know, but I see,
everybody else in America

is looking at me saying,

"Why doesn't that idiot ask her
why her head is shaved?"

So now I'm doing it.

I just cut my hair because
I wanted to cut my hair, you know?

It's like, you know,
I wear red knickers one day

because I want to wear
red knickers, you know?

And then black another day.

We wouldn't call those
knickers though, we'd call it...

No.

We got married at the
spiritualist centre in Sloane Square

and we'd been going to
the spiritualist centre a lot

because obviously,
Sin�ad lost her mom,

I'd lost my dad and a sister.

And we were kind
of trying to make

some kind of spiritual
connections if we could.

It was a sort of
a therapy for us in a way.

We had an amazing time there,
so we got married there.

It was brilliant,
it was a great day.

In 1989, we filmed
Hush-a-Bye Baby in Derry.

And it was in that
film Hush-a-Bye Baby

that Sin�ad made
her acting debut.

She came over with John.

She was fairly newly married,
I think.

She brought
her little son, Jake,

who was just a toddler
at that stage.

Of course, I only have
eyes for Lecce Loves.

Jesus Christ, Nigella.

We'll be barred
and it'll be your fault.

Sloppy tit, going on
about what's his face.

We were trying
to contribute to the debate

that was raging in Ireland at
the time about abortion rights

and women's sexuality and
how women were being treated.

And I think she had
exactly the same feelings

like so many thousands
of other women,

especially young women.

It's about a 15-year-old
school girl who gets pregnant

and about the obvious
trauma and awfulness

that she goes through
because of the fact

that she's pregnant and the
fact that teenage pregnancy

is just the worst thing
that could possibly happen

and people aren't very
supportive about it in general.

And girls are made
to feel as if they're sluts

and they're some sort
of whore, you know,

for sleeping with somebody
and things like that.

And because of things
like the church

and the contraceptive laws
and all that sort of thing

and the abortion laws.

In the 80s and 90s and
obviously the decades before that,

women were treated
abominably in Ireland.

Women's lives were patrolled
and investigated and surveilled

and tampered with
every minute of their lives.

It was appalling.

There was
a sense of being in this

little backward place, you know,

where the light wasn't
really shining brightly

and you couldn't
get contraception,

you couldn't get condoms,
so this was a big issue.

You didn't talk about sex and you
certainly didn't talk about abortion.

It's quite a similar story
to your own, isn't it?

No.

You had a baby
when you were very young.

Last time you told me that there
were certain attitudes in Ireland.

Yeah, except I had
a baby when I was 20

and I was living in London
and I had enough money

to get a nanny and I had a
boyfriend who was living with me

and I wasn't in school.

And I was in a society that
doesn't look down on pregnancy

as much as Ireland does.

So I don't think you can compare
that to a 15-year-old girl

who has no money
and no boyfriend and no support

from anybody,
you know what I mean?

- I think I was in very...
- nice circumstances

compared to those girls.

It seems years
Since you held the baby...

When you put
your first album out,

you don't really expect
anything to happen.

You don't have any expectations
in you when you do that.

You're not aware
of the whole world

of goodies and baddies

to be discovered.

And I remember I was quite
taken aback by the whole thing,

amused at the idea of me
sitting and doing press conferences

and things like that
because it was just

like completely ludicrous.

You know, at the time
that I had my baby

and put my album out I was 20,

which was extremely young.

And now I'm 23 which
is still extremely young

and I'm still developing my
"personality", in inverted commas.

And I'm still discovering
things about myself

and about the world, you know?

So naturally,
I'm not going to be the same

as I was when I was 20.

When the album "I Do Not
Want What I Haven't Got",

was finished, we took it
into Nigel Grange in Ensign

and he said, "This is like
reading somebody's diaries.

I'm not putting it out."

Sin�ad just said,
"Well, that's it,"

you know, end of story.

Didn't compromise it in any way.

Well, I am far more
proud of this album

than I was of the last one.

I feel that it's much
more truly reflective

of me than the last one was.

And I've had much
more involvement in it

than I had in the last one.

The way she grew in confidence

was something else.

She's a powerful, sexual being.

I think she was enjoying
playing with the gender roles,

the kind of toughness
of the leather jacket

and the toughness of denim
or the Dr. Martin boots

or whatever it was that she
was bringing at the time.

There's always
still this beautiful woman,

beautiful girl inside of that.

So she was playing
with gender herself.

She came to understand
the nature of what we were doing

with pop videos and also,
obviously, at a certain point

with a certain video, we came
to understand just how much

the videos could change
the perception of the music

and her as a musician.

"The Nothing
Compares To You" video,

she came back with all
the rushes on a VHS

and we've stuck it into the
video machine, I was watching it.

And that's when I thought,
"Wow, this is really,

really special."

The video was shot
both in studio and it was shot

in the Parc Saint-Cloud,
which is this beautiful

18th-century park
just outside of Paris.

The extraordinary close-up
work that John did

with the lighting camerawoman,
Dominique Le Rigoleur,

who we chose particularly
because we wanted a female

to create a relationship
between Sin�ad and the camera.

In between takes,

Sin�ad would click on some
really heavy duty dub reggae

and light up a spliff, and
be bopping around the studio.

We weren't in a kind of
particularly sombre mood.

Looking into my monitor,
looking down that lens,

I saw right there, this
connection coming down the camera...

It was like, "Oh, okay,

this is really something else.

It's not my direction,
it's not the cinematography,

it's entirely her."

If you don't

identify emotionally
with a song, you can't sing it.

I didn't know I was
gonna cry singing it.

I didn't cry in the studio,

it was just because
of the big eye on me

in the form of a camera.

Every time I sing the song,
I think of my mother.

I never stopped crying
for my mother for, Jesus,

I couldn't face being
in Ireland for 13 years.

I never even called home,
I just cut myself off entirely

but it took me, I would say,
25 years to stop crying.

So yeah, I was thinking of her
and I suppose my subconscious

was thinking of that little
girl that sat in the garden.

I think it's funny that
the world fell in love with me

because of crying and a tear.

I went and did a lot of crying

and everybody was like,
"Oh, you crazy bitch,"

but actually, hold on.

You fell in love with
that tear, that was a mirror.

Sit yourself down, well done.

- The hair is growing!
- Just a little bit.

Just a little bit, a wee bit.

How are you then?

I'm grand, I'm a bit tired,
but I'm fine.

- A little bit tired, yeah.
- So we're told.

Good to see you. Will you
be number one on Monday?

I don't know, you know.

You're all very kind.

I don't want to
count my chickens.

You know what I mean?

Half of me sorta says,
oh, well, you know,

it doesn't really
make a difference,

but then the other
half is sort of going,

oh, please, God, please.-

It would be nice, wouldn't it?

We shouldn't even be
thinking about this.

Shouldn't even be
thinking about it, okay.

When will you know?

Ten to three
on Sunday afternoon.

But I've got to try
not to think about it.

The song went number one,

everywhere in the world
pretty much.

Then everything
changed overnight.

- And the winner is...
- Sin�ad O'Connor.

- Sin�ad O'Connor.
- Sin�ad O'Connor.

I don't really know what to say,

except thank you very much.

You know, peace.

It's Sin�ad O'Connor.

Sin�ad,
"Nothing Compares To You."

The level of when
"Nothing Compares To You"

became a hit was extraordinary.

It really was off the scale.

She was the biggest thing.

I mean you think of artists
like Billie Eilish now

or Amy Winehouse,

you know that level of
intensity that's on you.

And also if you're incredibly
iconic in your look

and your style and your passion,

then there's a lot
of focus on you.

I didn't realize how huge
the single and the album were.

I really didn't.

And I looked in some
magazine the other day

and it said that
the record had been

something like the fourth
biggest record in America,

I nearly dropped dead.

I didn't have
the slightest idea.

The single
went to number one in America.

She was suddenly a major act.

Hello!

The tour got bigger and bigger
instead of theatres,

we got into arenas and stadiums.

It seems like years
Since you held the baby

While I wrecked the bedroom

You said it was
Dangerous after Sunday

And I knew you loved me...

She seemed
to take it all in her stride.

There were some days
when she was sort of like,

"Oh, this is a bit much," most of
the time she seemed to enjoy it.

There was obviously
a feeling of like,

"Oh, well, this is
going to be great."

It was going to be good anyway,

but this is going
to be really good.

I am stretched
On your grave

And will lie there forever

If your hands were in mine

I'd be sure we'd not sever

My apple tree
My brightness

It's time we were together

For I smell of the earth

And am worn
By the weather...

About halfway
through the tour,

we did a place in New Jersey.

It was an open air venue.

For some reason,

they always played the National
Anthem before the main act.

Sin�ad got to hear
about it, and said

"There's no way.

I'm not going on stage if
you play the National Anthem."

So there was a bit of an
argument between management

and management of the venue,

but in the end, the
venue relented, they said,

- "Alright, alright.
- If you don't want it played,

we won't play it."

And I thought, "Oh, this is
going to be everywhere tomorrow."

Going down to breakfast,
you hear the immortal words.

"Oh, God, have you
seen the papers?"

First, the explosion,
then the fallout.

Hi, 95.5 PLJ, it's Fast Jimmy,

and you will hear no Sin�ad
O'Connor on this radio station.

Sin�ad O'Connor is being shaved

from the airwaves because
of a recent refusal

to perform in concert if the
National Anthem was played.

With American soldiers
on foreign soil

poised for conflict,

patriotism is running
at fever pitch.

We decided Monday morning,
that since we played

the National Anthem
on our station

to support the troops
over in the Middle East,

that she probably
wouldn't welcome

being played on
our station either.

The wrong time, the wrong place

and the wrong way
to throw a tantrum.

Someone should just
have said to her,

within her own management,

"Sin�ad, shut up."

You don't like America,
then get the hell out.

My opinion is she
should go back to Ireland

or wherever the
hell she is from.

Don't tell my country, you
can't play the National Anthem.

I didn't put the marine green on to
listen to some bald-headed Irish girl

tell me I can't hear
my National Anthem.

She wants the money,
the fame and the glorification.

But she's going to have to
be sensitive to some issues.

One extreme
patriot is Frank Sinatra,

who said he would
like to kick her ass.

"At his age, he couldn't
lift his leg high enough

to kick her ass", says
Sin�ad's father, John O'Connor.

As soon as someone highlighted

that it had to be played,
she would say,

- "- Well, you can't censor me.
- This is my show

and why are you
telling me what to do?"

America is the land of free
speech, and they're telling her

she's not allowed
to have her free speech.

- Issue number 3, the bald chick.
- What's with her head?

- Let's start with the chick.
- What gives, Cue ball?

I'm looking at you. I'm thinking
14 in the side pocket.

I can't believe you're talking

about my hair with all
the bloody starvation

and the suffering in
the world right now.

- Come on, swing baby, you're platinum.
- Forget the head.

Put a bag over it
and do your business.

I think that,
certainly, the industry

can be extremely patronizing
towards women.

You're supposed to have
long hair wear push-up bras

and lip gloss, you know,
and shut up and sing.

Maybe if I was a man, there
wouldn't be such a fuss about it

you know what I mean?

It's just not expected
of women, I don't know.

But then nothing about me,
particularly, in people's minds,

conforms to what a woman
should conform to.

But I don't know if it's
so much a conscious problem

that they have
because I'm a woman.

I think it's because I'm not
a conformist on any level.

You know what I mean?

Tell me about this row
about the National Anthem,

were you right to get into that?

I don't think it was a situation
being wrong or right.

It was a situation of,
I acted at the time

in the way that I felt
would be most true to myself.

I didn't mean to offend anybody.

I did it because
I have a huge problem

with the censorship movement

that's happening
in America at the moment.

It has terrible implications.

The idea that artists, you know,

painters, photographers,
musicians, poets,

and people like that

are being told what
they may and may not say

and what they may
or may not write about.

- Where is that happening?
- -In America,

in particular among the
Black community it's happening.

So, I have two problems with it.

First of all, that I don't
think censorship should happen

at all to anybody.

But secondly, I think
that a lot of the time

there's a lot of White artists

who are very offensive as well,

and they don't get censored.

So it leaves me
thinking that it's

a slightly racist
problem as well.

So, you know,
if it happened now,

I might've reacted
in a different way,

I didn't realize that people
would take such offence to it.

- Because I didn't mean offence.
- You know what I mean?

The problem is that
a lot of people would say,

well, you didn't
not take the money.

You know, if they
asked me for the money,

I would gladly
have given it to them.

- You would, you would.
- All the money?

- Absolutely.
- All the money, Sin�ad?

Can't go through life
giving back the money.

I don't perform or make
records or do anything

in order to make money.

It's not the thing that I hold

most important in my life.

Well, I heard that she
doesn't like Ireland

and she doesn't like the USA.

So they're going to be
handing out American flags.

So we're going to wave it at her
and see what she does.

Controversy surrounds
her wherever she is.

Why do you think that is?

Just because of who she is.

- I don't think she gets a fair...
- because of the way she looks,

I don't think people
treat her fairly.

It's a very patriotic country.

And a lot of people
have been told

that I have some sort of
anti-American feeling,

which is very irresponsible
on behalf of the media,

because that does
put a person in a situation

where literally
their life could be at risk.

You know what I mean?

When the press
started to attack her

that was really difficult.

They arrived at the door
in London and Jake was with me

and he was only very young

and they started
to fire questions,

you know, while
Jake was next to me.

- And I just, I just was...
- I was absolutely furious.

Margaret Thatcher on TV

Shocked by the deaths
That took place in Beijing...

She's always championed justice.

You know,
if something wasn't right,

she would step in and try
and do something about it.

Listen, this song that I heard,

"Black Boys on Mopeds"

about the treatment
of Black people in England.

Very political, Sin�ad.

Well you can't really
talk about racism

without being political.

Yes. True, true.

England's not
The mythical land

Of Madame George and roses

It's the home of police

Who kill Black boys
On mopeds

And I love my boy

And that's why I'm leaving

I don't want him
To be aware that there's

Any such thing as grieving

Young mother
Down at Smithfield

5:00 a.m., looking for food
For her kids...

We were
living in Stoke Newington

when she wrote that song,
you know, it was around us,

you know, that kind of police
versus the Black community.

It was ugly at that point,

particularly in
that part of London.

The police
are picking on children!

I write songs about things

that I feel strongly about.

It's not consciously
to write a political song

or consciously to make
a statement about anything.

And I think that that's
what every person's duty

to themselves is, is to act
on their feelings and to say,

when they think
something's wrong.

It doesn't matter whether they're, you
know, a singer, or whatever they are.

Yes, and take the consequences.

I imagine so.

I'm an Irish artist,

and there's a tradition
among Irish artists

of being agitators
and activists.

You know, whether
they're playwrights or poets.

An artists job
is sometimes to create

the difficult conversations
that need to be had.

And it's none of my business,

what anyone thinks of me
when I do that.

The right to choose an abortion,

the right to information
on where to obtain one.

In Dublin's O'Connell street,
singer Sin�ad O'Connor

speaks out against her
country's stringent abortion laws.

Abortion will be legalized
in this country very soon.

Let's have another referendum

when only women
of childbearing age vote

for the right to choose
their own destiny.

What I believe is that
you cannot take away

a person's right to choose.

It is not a pro-abortion
or an anti-abortion issue.

The issue is
the right to choose.

The church deliberately
distract us from that,

by making it into
an either anti or for,

- you know what I mean?
- But it's not that.

It's the right to choose
your own destiny.

And it's none of
anybody else's business,

not your mother or your father
or anybody else.

Or your priest.

I never felt
that Sin�ad would cave

to any pressure. Ever.

Then she just seemed to become
really controversial about everything.

Two weeks before the Grammys,

O'Connor threw down
the gauntlet to her peers

announcing she would not
attend the ceremonies

because the music industry
was driven by greed

and artists
were not speaking out

against the war in the Gulf.

It is the creative community
that are driven by greed.

That's why none of them
are saying anything

because
they're afraid their careers

are going to be in jeopardy.

It's why nobody has said
anything about the war.

When Sin�ad refused
to perform at the Grammys,

I was under a lot of pressure
to change her mind.

As if that were even possible.

It wasn't like
threatening-threatening,

but I felt that my career
could certainly be in jeopardy,

and Sin�ad's as well.

These were powerful people
in the industry.

I didn't think that the
powers that be were ready for her.

Where she's from,

artists had always
stepped forward and said things,

but maybe in different genres,

and not so much
as a pop superstar.

And Sin�ad O'Connor, well,
she was becoming a pop superstar.

Okay, so this is my favourite
place in the universe,

which is St. Mark's place.

All the Rastas live there,

and all the Irish people
live here, which is why I like it,

because Rastas and Irish
people should live together,

since they're both the same.

And this is Sin�.

The object of my game coming
into the music business was

I really saw it as something
like a bit of a chess game.

Could I get from one side
of the board to the other

and still be myself
and still be true to my reasons

for being in the music business?

And also, I suppose,
spiritually true to myself,

do you know what I mean?

The music business can be
a bit of a vampiric arena.

That's Charlie.

The first one's Charlie,
and that's Charlton.

- Say hello to Jake.
- Hi, Jake.

Gary.

- Yes?
- Say hello to Jake.

- Him Jake.
- That's Gary.

Maybe we'll get
to see you, Jake.

He's really mad.

Hi, Jake, how're you doing?

- Say hello to Jake.
- Jake. How are you?

You can go around
trying to please everyone

as if you're in
a popularity contest,

and yeah, that might get
you lots and lots of money,

but that's not necessarily
going to be keeping the contract

that you made with yourself.

That was the last one,
wasn't it?

That was the very last one.

Okay, can we go on
from a bit before?

- Yes.
- - I didn't want to fall into that trap then

of you know, the follow up
album to the number one, single.

And so I was kind of buying
myself some time really,

creatively speaking.

Because you've had
that hit record,

all of a sudden
you could go in there

and tell them you want
to make a record of farts,

and they'll say,
"Yeah, sure. Okay."

Let's listen back and make
sure we love this arrangement.

- Okay?
- - I think there's a huge pressure from labels

when an artist has
a worldwide number one.

And I think with the,
"Am I Not Your Girl" album,

this was a great antidote,
really to what happened.

And it had the most amazing
team of arrangers, musicians,

and of course, legendary
Phil Ramone producing.

It was just such
a joy that record.

We used to go out walking

Hand in hand

You told me all
The big things

You had planned...

I did love the record,
and I loved making it.

It was just astonishing
being in a room

with that band every day.
It was just like, "Oh, my God."

I was quite
intimidated actually.

I was quite scared
to open my mouth

because the band were just
so ridiculously brilliant

and I couldn't see myself
as being anyway good.

Am I not your girl?

Am I not your girl?

Am I not your girl?

Am I not.

There were things
going on in my own life.

Things I was discovering
that my mother had done

that I didn't know about.

And then I had come across
an article about families

who had been trying
to lodge complaints

against the church
for sexual abuse

and were being silenced.

Basically fucking everything I
had been raised to believe was a lie.

You know, that everything about
the Catholic church was a lie.

Ave, ave, ave Maria

At the end of the line
of bishops, walked the Pope.

And as the crowd noticed him,
they broke into cheering and clapping.

I took two things
out of my mother's house.

One was her cookery book,

and the next was
a picture of the Pope,

which had been
on her bedroom wall.

Young people of Ireland,

I love you.

He didn't fucking love me.

And I could fuckin' cry
right now saying it.

You know, it was such a lie.

Now we know what a lie that was.

He was so involved
in covering up

what happened to everybody.

And I had a right
to fight that evil

because I loved the church.

I'm going to go on
Saturday Night Live

and I've got fuck all to lose

because no one could
do jack shit to me

that hasn't been done already.

I had booked her
on Saturday Night Live.

Now this was for
her third record,

which was,
"Am I Not Your Girl."

It's a great booking,
the record was just coming out,

and this would really help it.

Ladies and gentlemen,
Sin�ad O'Connor.

Until the philosophy

Which holds one
Race superior

And another

Inferior

Is finally

And permanently

Discredited...

The song is also very important.

You know, it's a Rastafari song.

It's a speech that
the Emperor Haile Selassie

had made at the United Nations,
and then Bob Marley

turned it into a song.

First class and second class
Citizens of any nation

Until the colour Of a man's skin

Is of no more significance

Than the colour of his eyes

I've got to say war...

...war

War in the east

War in the west

War up north

War down south

There's war

And rumours of war

Until that day

There is no continent
Which will know peace

Children, children

Fight

We find it necessary

We know we will win

We have confidence

In the victory

Of good

Over evil

Fight the real enemy.

Nobody knows what to do.

My blood has run cold.

She blows a candle out,
she goes off stage,

she goes into her dressing room
and she's so happy.

You know,
she had pulled this off.

And I had gone into
the dressing room after her,

and I said, "You know,
I can't get you out of this."

- And she said, "You know what?
- I don't want you to."

What effect do you think

this is gonna have on
your career, Sin�ad?

I don't know.

Do you care?

Um, well, it depends on
what you mean by...

- I don't know.
- You'd have to say what you meant.

Do you think what you have done

will make you more popular
with your fans?

Less popular with your fans?

Or will it just be something
that Sin�ad O'Connor did

in a rash moment?

- Well, I can't really say.
- I don't know.

Are you prepared
to accept the consequences,

which you said don't seem
to be negative, right?

Of what you're doing?

What consequences?

Well, look at the alternative.

Sin�ad O'Connor
is no stranger to controversy.

A master of the shock tactics.

But this time some are
questioning whether she went too far.

No response yet from the Pope,

but church spokesmen say
that he will no doubt

forgive Sin�ad O'Connor
for her bout of Vatican bashing

on NBC's Saturday Night Live.

The controversy for singer
Sin�ad O'Connor

as she strikes a sour
note with Catholics.

NBC has been at pains to stress

it doesn't condone what she did.

The network says O'Connor's
tirade caught them off guard.

NBC logged a thousand
complaint calls...

Her actions Saturday
night were spontaneous,

certainly unauthorized by NBC,

and NBC was offended
by what she did.

The Catholic league
for religious and civil rights

is pressuring record stores
to stop selling recordings

by O'Connor
and her record company.

During the lunch hour,
they passed out leaflets,

urging customers
to join their boycott.

Some didn't need
any encouragement.

I thought it was repulsive.

Anyone that sends
us in their tapes,

we're going to chop
up these tapes.

Actually, we were just
going to send them to her.

Someone said,
don't send the tapes new.

Break them up,
'cause she'll sell them again.

So we're going to break them up

and put them in a trunk,

and have someone
deliver them to her

in Ireland
or wherever she may be.

I would've grabbed her
by her eyebrows.

Sin�ad O'Connor...,
you know and so on.

Or you just don't like that she
tore up a picture of the Pope.

Oh, no, Sin�ad O'Connor
is completely a robot brain.

- She has messages...
- She's like Victorian,

she has messages where she
slaps onto art like labels.

But I'll tell you one thing,
she was very lucky

it wasn't my show.

'Cause if it was my show,
I would've gave her such a smack.

Sin�ad O'Conner, who's
big theme is child abuse...

- All right?
- It all comes from child abuse.

In the case of Sin�ad O'Conner,
child abuse was justified.

I got a little bit worried,

you know when things were
going really badly in the press for her.

It was a terrible time for us.

And just created this hatred.

It was unbelievable.

I had fan letters
with death threats to myself,

death threats to Sin�ad,

and one day I took in
a sack load of letters

that were directly
threatening either to her

or to me, or any of our team.

I was watching it with
some friends as it happened.

And we were all applauding
and cheering and were like,

"Feminist performance art,
on TV.

When does that ever happen?"

I can't sit here and tell
you that I was all like,

- "- Oh, no, Sin�ad O'Connor is an icon.
- She's ahead of her time."

I don't think I was
saying that then.

I think I probably was joining in,
"Oh, God, what's she doing now?"

There was this idea that
she was a bit of a joke.

Fight the real enemy.

When she does
a concert in New York city,

if she has the guts
to ever do a concert

in New York City again,

after one of her songs,

I'm going to jump up on stage

and tear up a photo
of Uncle Fester.

Do you enjoy shocking people?

No, but I enjoy a good debate.

Did you realize
the consequences at the time?

I don't think it's a good idea
to talk about it here, tonight.

So you don't want
to talk about it at all.

Some other time,
I'll talk to you about it.

But obviously
you don't have any regrets.

No, absolutely not.

I'm real proud...

to introduce this next artist

whose name's become
synonymous with courage,

and integrity.

Ladies and gentleman,
Sin�ad O'Connor.

Thank you.

I'm on stage and the
audience start making this

mad noise where half
of them are booing

and half of them are cheering.

And it's the fucking
weirdest noise

- I've ever heard in my life.
- And it makes me want to puke.

My song that I was
supposed to sing

at Madison Square Garden
was "I Believe in You."

This song was to be
sung in a whisper,

and I knew that I couldn't

because I wouldn't be heard,

I would have been drowned out
and I couldn't have that.

"Are you going to stand by me"

was almost what I felt
God was saying to me.

"Are you going to
fucking stand by me,

or are you going
to pussy out here

and walk off stage."

Okay, turn this up.

Until the philosophy

Which holds one
Race superior

And another inferior

Is finally

And permanently discredited

And abandoned

Everywhere is war

Until there's no longer

First class or
Second class citizens

Of any nation

Until the colour
Of a man's skin

Is of no more significance

Than the colour of his eyes

I've got to say war

Until, the basic Human rights

Are equally
Guaranteed to all

Without regard to race

I say war

And until

The ignoble
And unhappy regime

Which holds all
Of us through

Child abuse, yeah

Child abuse, yeah

Subhuman bondage

Has been toppled

Utterly destroyed

Everywhere is war

Everything kind of
coalesced into that moment.

Someone who grew up
in a household

of abuse and rejection,

then being rejected,

by what probably felt like
the whole entire world,

re-traumatizing her
in front of the world,

it made me feel demoralized,
as a woman.

People that would boo
Sin�ad O'Connor,

what were they doing
at a Bob Dylan concert?

She's taken quite a beating,
in the world,

because, the world
does not take kindly,

to having its
program interrupted.

The smooth flow of entertainment
must not be interrupted.

"My name is Sin�ad O'Connor,

and I'm learning to love myself.

I am deserving,

I deserve to be
treated with respect,

I deserve not to be
treated like dirt,

I deserve to be listened to.

My name is Sin�ad O'Connor,

I am a woman,
I have something to offer,

I am and have always been
carrying a lot of grief,

from my lost childhood,

and for the effects of its
horror and violence on my life.

I find it hard to be myself,

to show my feelings.

To get to the joy,

I need to release the pain,
which is blocking me.

If I do not do this,
I will not survive.

I was angry before,
because I was frightened,

but I know that if you
could really listen,

you'd see that we do not
know what we are doing,

when we mock the expression
of human feeling.

When we scoff at the sound
of our children's keening,

there's a mirror into
which we are not looking.

There's no way
I'm going to shut my mouth,

I am a battered child,

and the whole bloody world
is gonna know about it,

the same as they are gonna know
about every other battered child.

They are not going to
be able to shut us up,

just because they don't
want to hear about it.

We all have,
mental health issues,

you know, on one level,

and it's very important
for us to recognize that,

and I think that's something
that Sin�ad O'Connor

did way before anybody else.

I was always being
crazied by the media,

made out to be crazy.

I don't blame anybody,
for thinking I was crazy,

or for hating me for it,
or whatever,

'cause they didn't know,
I mean, it was a crazy idea,

I mean, this bitch
is saying that,

priests are raping children,

I mean, Jesus Christ,

of course it seemed
crazy to them.

Sin�ad was put into isolation.

She, was still
making great music,

still making great records,

but we didn't hear them
and we didn't see them.

In those days, if the press
weren't talking about you,

if you weren't on the radio,
if you weren't on TV screens,

you might as well
have not existed.

Which is what
happened with Sin�ad,

she just disappears.

I have about a ten-year period

I don't remember much,

because it suddenly
became a free for all

for everybody around me,

personally and publicly to
treat me like shit basically.

They didn't like what
they saw on the mirror,

I understand that now,

but when I was younger,
I was just hurt.

The
willingness to tell her story,

to share her personal pain,
her struggles,

to share them, with Ireland
and with the world,

I think has given people,
the courage to do the same.

On behalf of this state,

the government and our citizens,

deeply regret,
and apologize unreservedly,

to all those women,

for the hurt
that was done to them,

for the, any stigma
they have suffered,

as a result
of the time they spent,

in the Magdalene Laundries.

Today, we live in
a very different country,

with a very different
consciousness,

and a very different awareness.

An Ireland where we have
more compassion,

more empathy,
more insight, more heart.

We do, because at last, we are
learning those terrible lessons.

We do, because at last
we're giving up our secrets.

In Ireland, it's being
called a quiet revolution,

and a victory for women.

The once
conservative nation, voted yes

to repeal a constitutional
ban on abortion.

Yeah,
I'm proud to be Irish today.

I think Ireland's coming so far,

in the last ten years,
and I think it's really showing

that we're not so influenced

by the church as much anymore.

Wherever there's
that righteous anger

of a woman now,
who is making a difference,

who's changing things,

who's standing up
and being courageous.

That is where the little
sparks of Sin�ad are.

We are seeing the rights that
people fought for being pulled back,

being diminished,

and... to look at the power
of speaking out,

and she is the absolute epitome
of what that power is.

We need to keep showing
how effective it is,

and how important it is.

Women's bodies are under attack!

- What do we do?
- Stand up, fight back!

There's a lot
of artists that came afterward,

that were able to say
and speak their mind,

and spill their soul.

She broke the ice
for a whole decade

or two decades
of artists after her.

A government inquiry last year

found some Irish bishops

put their church's reputation

before the interests
of their flock,

actively covering up clerical
child abuse for 30 years.

But the scandals
go far beyond Ireland,

and touch the Vatican directly.

Last week, it was alleged
that Pope Benedict,

then known as
Cardinal Ratzinger,

had prevented the church trial,

of an American paedophile
priest, in the 1990s.

The church in Ireland,
must acknowledge before the Lord

and others,
the serious sins committed

against defenceless children.

Sin�ad O'Connor as an artist,
forged her own path

in a world that just
was not ready for her.

This young upstart,

with the most beautiful voice
you can imagine,

showed up, and just rocked
the shit out of the horse cart.

I don't want to see
her as a martyr,

because she's a
three-dimensional human being.

She makes mistakes,
she's a weirdo, she's great,

she's a lot of different things.

She did not deserve
what she got.

I regret that people
treated me like shit,

and I regret that I was
so wounded already

that that really,
really killed me and hurt me.

You know?

They all thought that I should
be made a mockery of

for throwing
my career down the drain.

I never set out
to be a pop star,

it didn't suit me
being a pop star.

So I didn't throw away any
fucking career that I wanted.

Didn't change my attitude.

I wasn't sorry,
I didn't regret it,

it was the proudest thing
I've ever done as an artist.

They broke my heart and
they killed me, but I didn't die.

They tried to bury me,

they didn't realize
I was a seed.

Thank you for hearing me

Thank you for hearing me

Thank you for hearing me

Thank you for hearing me

Thank you for loving me

Thank you for loving me

Thank you for loving me

Thank you for loving me

Which means forsaking me

Thank you for seeing me

Thank you for seeing me

Thank you for seeing me

And for not leaving me

And for not leaving me

And for not leaving me

And for not leaving me

Thank you
For staying with me

Thank you
For staying with me

Thank you
For staying with me

Thank you
For staying with me

Thanks for not hurting me

Thanks for not hurting me

Thanks for not hurting me

Thanks for not hurting me

You are gentle with me

You are gentle with me

You are gentle with me

You are gentle with me

Thanks for silence with me

Thanks for silence with me

Thanks for silence with me

Thanks for silence with me

Thank you for holding me

And saying I could be

Thank you
For saying, "Baby"

Thank you for holding me

Thank you for helping me

Thank you for helping me

Thank you for helping me

Thank you

Thank you for helping me

Thank you
For breaking my heart

Thank you
For tearing me apart

Now I've a strong

Strong heart

Thank you

For breaking my heart