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[Applause]
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joe
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joe
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joe you let us out of here right now
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[ __ ] now
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this is the saddest story in america
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the motor city was once capitalism's
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greatest achievement but now
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now it's become this
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and since 2000 the population here has
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shrunk by a third
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response time to a 9-1-1 call can top
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two hours
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the city can't keep the street lights on
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and if it snows you're stuck
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because they don't clear the roads
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anymore
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atlantis
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troy
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pompe
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we can now add detroit to that list
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and yet
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here
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in the midst of this wasteland i think
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we may have found a real gem
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[Applause]
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8989 redstone lane
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you've seen shows where people flip
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houses by painting walls make things
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look pretty
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anybody can do that
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i'm the guy who handles the real jobs
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i handle the disasters
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i'm the guy
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who goes where others fear to tread
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this is my daughter rebecca
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now one day she's gonna have to keep my
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business going
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and i know she's gonna do me proud
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i'm daryl masters and there isn't a
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property on this earth that i can't get
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back up on its feet and sell for a
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problem
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i call it
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mastering disaster
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and that's how we do that
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[Music]
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the house is over a hundred years old
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but it's got wear and tear on it for
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five
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and yeah
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she looks haunted but that's only
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because the whole city is one big
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haunted house
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luckily i believe in resurrections and
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she is ripe for one
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come on check this out
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[Music]
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[Music]
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what's that
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that [ __ ]
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and that
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yes
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so it looks like your apartment
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see that
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see that
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turn in the century craftsman banisters
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these are going to clean up grant
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hello
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crazy
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[Music]
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oh
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looking good looking good turn that [ __ ]
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off oh come on we know you're not shy
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give us a little sexy
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producer's gone
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[Music]
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turn it off i'll erase it later come on
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that's what they all say
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oh okay
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that's my
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it's phone
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it's never good when you call this early
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what
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daryl that's absurd we can't just
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no of course we can't
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hello
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hey hunga
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what's he won he wanted to take next
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week off for a book signing it's the
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middle of the
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so i season him that if he ever hung up
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on me again i would not pick up his call
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for 48 hours
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[ __ ] up
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[Music]
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who's
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here god i love the first morning of a
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new job
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feels like a million bucks you know like
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nothing can go wrong
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honey where's your camera hat
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not wearing that looks stupid
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hey
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honey
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do you have to wear that
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i have a migraine
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this is wet almost since we got here
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please stop hassling me honey i need the
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guys checking out the house not checking
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out you
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honey dad grow up
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yeah
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grow up darryl cut any time guys
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these hardwood floors are amazing and if
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we're lucky we can save most of them all
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we'll need to do is sand stain and
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urethane they'll be as good as new and
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we're going to tear out this old
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wallpaper redo the electric paint the
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walls a nice neutral coat
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okay okay
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and then then we're gonna track down
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that draft and we're gonna take care of
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that
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okay no
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how was that
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okay
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next room all right
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let's go
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oh my god
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i got it i got perfect hair did you see
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that
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play it back that's hilarious
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hey holy [ __ ] take a look at this
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get a shot of this i got you you got me
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all right
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look at this you don't see this anywhere
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this is the kind of detail work that is
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gonna sell this house and put more money
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in our pockets
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okay we good good all right let's go to
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the kitchen
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looking good
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yes
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keep up
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[Music]
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okay
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one two three four five
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and there's your problem with these old
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houses they make all these bedrooms the
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size of tiny little closets and to make
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matters worse
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they only allow one bathroom per floor
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so what are we gonna do about it we're
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gonna knock down some walls
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we're gonna make three bedrooms out of
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five we're gonna redo one bathroom and
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we're gonna add another
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the attic needs to be redone top to
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bottom and we're gonna need to add
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insulation
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this is christ
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you okay get me stuck on anything
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easy easy
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god
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damn
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oh okay
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in some old properties like this
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there is always some bone-headed attempt
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to try and add something
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usually by clowns who have no idea what
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the hell they're doing
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look at this
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oh you've got to be kidding me
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that's got to be like the thinnest
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closet in the world
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that's
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totally useless
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this closet will be
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going okay
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you'll soon see that the basement is
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really spacious but it needs to be
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completely refinished
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geez i can't even see you you know it
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would be nice if we had some goddamn
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lights yes they're in a horse gash down
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here oh come on
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hey
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i've heard worse
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calm down [ __ ] are you serious
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shouldn't you have lights strung up here
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all right decaf bro just relax god
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remember your heart you have to calm
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down i know honey i'm fine
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all right i'm fine my heart is fine okay
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everybody okay
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holy [ __ ] [ __ ] it's like a goddamn
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minefield in this house
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well [ __ ] me that was a good take i
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guess we got to do that again oh it's
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darker than a cave in here
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you got that right
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greg
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penny for your thoughts
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come on mine are worth a lot more than
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that
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so you mean to tell me that rebecca was
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right about you that you're just a
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cranky old crunchin
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must be rage
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[ __ ] off
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damn laser measure doesn't work
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makes the inside's bigger than the
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outside well maybe some uh good
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old-fashioned measuring tape is called
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for
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maybe
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[Music]
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this bad one
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not yet but it's gonna be
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have you
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ever thought of maybe oh honey no
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no look
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you can't worry about that okay
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look you may have gotten the gene for
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your mom's migraines but that's all you
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have in common with her
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i suppose
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honey
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headaches and hallucinations they are
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two wildly different things
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it's not like i've seen things that
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weren't there before
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[Music]
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you call me
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yeah i'm [ __ ] calling you
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the hell man i'm over here i'm cleaning
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stuff up and you're not getting it i'm
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sorry
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do it again and i'll shoot it what [ __ ]
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you're the director now god
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water
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god damn it pull it together you
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understand how this works i know how
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this works do you
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look we both need this show
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but you need it man way more than i do
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[ __ ]
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cute we are all here to make a show okay
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the editors cannot cut what we don't
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shoot i know
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it's what i'm trying to tell this
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[ __ ] well you picking up a [ __ ]
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twig isn't what anyone wants to see
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that's all part of what we do [ __ ]
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daryl put your shirt again you know what
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[ __ ] you [ __ ] you [ __ ] you would kiss my
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ass
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dad
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[Music]
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down here [ __ ] fire fire god damn it
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call 911
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so
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uh
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[Music]
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[Music]
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what the [ __ ]
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[Music]
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what the [ __ ]
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[Music]
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[Music]
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not we're okay
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the fire department doesn't know what
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caused the fire but the suspicion is
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faulty wiring now the good news it's
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only damaged a small area upstairs the
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bad news it's gonna add to our cost
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probably about 10 grand ah what the hell
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is this
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oh god damn it redneck get the first aid
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kit
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gamma go find joey
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anywhere but here what's going on
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grandma's hurt you know what i'm gonna
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pull this out on the count of three okay
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all right hope you had your shots
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what up daddy
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where's the first aid kit
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uh
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where's rebecca
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rebecca
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watch after rama rebecca
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[Music]
295
00:16:20,880 --> 00:16:23,839
i don't hear anything
296
00:16:29,839 --> 00:16:31,360
where is she
297
00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:34,000
the hell was making all that noise oh
298
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:37,000
darling
299
00:16:38,639 --> 00:16:41,360
oh my god
300
00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:43,600
honey
301
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,560
you can't you can't scare me like that
302
00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:49,839
okay you can't as long as you don't
303
00:16:49,839 --> 00:16:51,360
i'm your dad
304
00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,519
that's my job
305
00:16:53,519 --> 00:16:56,079
holy [ __ ]
306
00:16:56,079 --> 00:16:58,480
my wife died
307
00:16:58,480 --> 00:17:03,079
in an institution a couple of years ago
308
00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:05,919
it just
309
00:17:05,919 --> 00:17:08,720
it just broke my heart
310
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:10,400
you know she had a
311
00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:12,160
had a couple of bad years there near the
312
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:14,640
end and
313
00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:18,720
you know
314
00:17:18,720 --> 00:17:20,880
rebecca she's she's all i got left in
315
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:23,520
that marriage
316
00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,039
okay
317
00:17:27,039 --> 00:17:29,679
all right you know what let's uh
318
00:17:29,679 --> 00:17:31,440
shoot a rap after this fuck-up of the
319
00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:33,840
day
320
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:36,320
okay
321
00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:39,520
okay
322
00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:41,360
we took ramen to the clinic
323
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,520
he's gonna be just fine and we got the
324
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:45,120
boy sweeping the house for nails so that
325
00:17:45,120 --> 00:17:48,400
we don't have a reoccurrence
326
00:17:52,960 --> 00:17:54,640
you know what gamet
327
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:57,520
don't you wonder about this [ __ ]
328
00:17:57,520 --> 00:17:59,679
i mean the nail and the
329
00:17:59,679 --> 00:18:01,280
fire and the
330
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:02,480
doesn't that just seem like a bit too
331
00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:03,760
much
332
00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:06,480
what are you saying
333
00:18:08,080 --> 00:18:09,919
i'm saying i think we got a producer
334
00:18:09,919 --> 00:18:14,039
that likes to stir [ __ ] up
335
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:18,880
daryl
336
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:20,480
just looking for you
337
00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:23,600
what now where'd you send everybody
338
00:18:23,600 --> 00:18:24,799
what are you talking about but there's
339
00:18:24,799 --> 00:18:26,640
nobody in the house
340
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,120
what
341
00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:31,039
where the hell is everybody
342
00:18:31,039 --> 00:18:33,200
god damn it
343
00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:35,120
[Music]
344
00:18:35,120 --> 00:18:38,000
here we go again
345
00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:40,080
greg
346
00:18:40,080 --> 00:18:41,760
greg
347
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:44,000
god damn it
348
00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:45,180
honey you see greg
349
00:18:45,180 --> 00:18:47,360
[Music]
350
00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:50,400
anybody see them leave i saw gregory you
351
00:18:50,400 --> 00:18:52,080
did you saw him leave yes you saw him
352
00:18:52,080 --> 00:18:53,440
leave did you ask where he was going oh
353
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:54,960
he was moving too fast for me to catch
354
00:18:54,960 --> 00:18:57,919
him [ __ ] me you didn't no unbelievable
355
00:18:57,919 --> 00:18:59,840
unbelievable great
356
00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:03,520
[ __ ] good job man good [ __ ] job
357
00:19:03,520 --> 00:19:05,039
son of a [ __ ]
358
00:19:05,039 --> 00:19:06,720
where the hell did they go that's what
359
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,840
i'm asking you oh shut
360
00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:11,200
up there
361
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:15,200
greg it's daryl where the [ __ ] are you
362
00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:17,840
man this is a bad time to take a break
363
00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:20,990
clock is ticking call me
364
00:19:20,990 --> 00:19:24,029
[Music]
365
00:19:24,559 --> 00:19:26,080
six [ __ ] years i've known that guy
366
00:19:26,080 --> 00:19:28,160
he's never done this to me one time
367
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:30,160
today
368
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:32,240
what the [ __ ] are we gonna do
369
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:33,600
what the [ __ ] are we gonna do we're
370
00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:35,600
gonna [ __ ] google people we're gonna
371
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:37,840
google people nice way to produce
372
00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:40,559
producer of the [ __ ] year
373
00:19:40,559 --> 00:19:43,200
i've lost my [ __ ] crew and you're
374
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:45,919
gonna google daryl shut up go google
375
00:19:45,919 --> 00:19:50,200
google go ahead google
376
00:19:56,799 --> 00:19:58,640
is daryl okay
377
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,039
seems like he's been at like an 11 every
378
00:20:01,039 --> 00:20:04,000
day this month he hasn't been that bad
379
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:05,760
are you kidding have you already
380
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,679
forgotten moline
381
00:20:07,679 --> 00:20:09,919
that wasn't 11. no i barely remember
382
00:20:09,919 --> 00:20:10,799
molly
383
00:20:10,799 --> 00:20:13,919
that was two months ago pi
384
00:20:13,919 --> 00:20:18,200
it feels like a thousand years ago
385
00:20:24,490 --> 00:20:27,549
[Music]
386
00:20:31,039 --> 00:20:34,280
first rebecca
387
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:36,720
you hooked up with joe and moline didn't
388
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,720
you what
389
00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:39,760
no
390
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:41,600
no way gross
391
00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:44,000
you're a good liar
392
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:46,559
you're just trying to change the subject
393
00:20:46,559 --> 00:20:49,280
gamma says he did of course he did
394
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:52,080
he's just trying to get in your pants oh
395
00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:54,880
gamma is trying to get into my van
396
00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:56,880
believe me there's nothing between joe
397
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:57,760
and i
398
00:20:57,760 --> 00:20:59,520
joe looks at you like she's marking her
399
00:20:59,520 --> 00:21:03,039
territory and she looks at me like
400
00:21:03,039 --> 00:21:05,679
i'm five she's like 40.
401
00:21:05,679 --> 00:21:08,080
okay guys like what are women take it
402
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:09,919
from me that is not true
403
00:21:09,919 --> 00:21:11,520
now it's time for me to ask you a
404
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:12,640
question
405
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:14,159
shoot
406
00:21:14,159 --> 00:21:16,320
you never talk about your mom that's
407
00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:17,840
right
408
00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:19,360
i don't
409
00:21:19,360 --> 00:21:20,960
it's a bad chapter in my life and it
410
00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:23,200
ruins any day when i have to talk about
411
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:24,960
it i'm sorry
412
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:28,000
i shouldn't have brought it up
413
00:21:29,039 --> 00:21:31,440
look
414
00:21:31,440 --> 00:21:33,440
my mom died
415
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:35,600
right when i was getting to know her
416
00:21:35,600 --> 00:21:37,730
right when we were becoming friends
417
00:21:37,730 --> 00:21:40,320
[Music]
418
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:42,799
then one day we were taking a walk and
419
00:21:42,799 --> 00:21:44,559
she coughed
420
00:21:44,559 --> 00:21:48,159
one cough and another and another and
421
00:21:48,159 --> 00:21:49,840
when we got home dad and cooked for us
422
00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:51,679
but
423
00:21:51,679 --> 00:21:53,440
she was sick
424
00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:57,880
and gray and had no appetite
425
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:02,570
three months after that she was gone
426
00:22:02,570 --> 00:22:05,520
[Music]
427
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:07,520
i am so sorry
428
00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:09,440
i didn't know
429
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:13,000
let me show you something
430
00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:25,280
that is a piece of the bread dad baked
431
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:28,320
the day i just told you about
432
00:22:28,320 --> 00:22:32,320
the day i first saw the fear in her face
433
00:22:34,880 --> 00:22:37,760
that day was the end of my old life
434
00:22:37,760 --> 00:22:41,840
and i saved this bread because
435
00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:44,320
somehow i knew it right away
436
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:46,799
i shouldn't have brought it up
437
00:22:46,799 --> 00:22:48,000
i'm sorry
438
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:50,159
no i'm glad you did
439
00:22:50,159 --> 00:22:52,799
means you care
440
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:56,080
but i know you have one question on your
441
00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:57,120
mind
442
00:22:57,120 --> 00:22:58,159
no
443
00:22:58,159 --> 00:23:01,840
well just my dad can make bread
444
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,159
believe it or not the man can cook and
445
00:23:04,159 --> 00:23:07,679
bake like a champ i can't believe that
446
00:23:07,679 --> 00:23:09,039
since we're talking i'll tell you
447
00:23:09,039 --> 00:23:10,640
something else
448
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,919
something i haven't told a school yet um
449
00:23:13,919 --> 00:23:15,360
i'm all ears
450
00:23:15,360 --> 00:23:17,280
i'm quitting mastering disaster as soon
451
00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:19,600
as we're done finishing this season
452
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:21,600
i'm gonna go back to school
453
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:23,679
and get a degree and i'm gonna move on
454
00:23:23,679 --> 00:23:25,200
with my life
455
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,360
does daryl know no
456
00:23:27,360 --> 00:23:31,360
absolutely not he would kill me but
457
00:23:31,360 --> 00:23:33,120
i can't keep doing this
458
00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:35,760
mastering disaster is his dream
459
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,240
i need to find mine i'll get over it
460
00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:39,440
eventually
461
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:41,919
maybe
462
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:44,320
but he won't understand me not being in
463
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:47,039
the hotel room when he's back so
464
00:23:47,039 --> 00:23:50,080
right and how can you share a room with
465
00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:51,280
him
466
00:23:51,280 --> 00:23:53,840
the men's noise like a freight train i
467
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,520
can hear him through the walls
468
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:57,120
how do you know that isn't me
469
00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:58,480
that can't be you
470
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:01,280
well you'll never know
471
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:03,440
that can't be you
472
00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:05,840
it's not you
473
00:24:09,200 --> 00:24:25,120
[Music]
474
00:24:25,120 --> 00:24:27,679
i checked on rama at the clinic
475
00:24:27,679 --> 00:24:28,960
and he split
476
00:24:28,960 --> 00:24:31,120
do i don't know where and then i paid
477
00:24:31,120 --> 00:24:32,400
his bill
478
00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:34,400
sorry my life
479
00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:37,039
greg bailed
480
00:24:37,039 --> 00:24:39,039
and i'm gonna miss him yeah you're doing
481
00:24:39,039 --> 00:24:39,919
it
482
00:24:39,919 --> 00:24:41,360
he's the only one that can talk daryl
483
00:24:41,360 --> 00:24:43,440
off a [ __ ] roof
484
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:45,840
and i am [ __ ] counting the seconds
485
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:48,559
until they can leave this dump
486
00:24:48,559 --> 00:24:50,720
i'm in this business because i saw
487
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:54,080
titanic when i was 15.
488
00:24:54,159 --> 00:24:55,840
now that's comedy
489
00:24:55,840 --> 00:24:58,080
let's go meet the new crew
490
00:24:58,080 --> 00:24:59,279
hey
491
00:24:59,279 --> 00:25:01,840
how are you daryl masters your uh buddha
492
00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:04,000
right yeah yeah how are you doing this
493
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:07,120
my daughter rebecca
494
00:25:07,120 --> 00:25:08,559
why the hell is the mexican called
495
00:25:08,559 --> 00:25:10,159
buddha
496
00:25:10,159 --> 00:25:11,679
is it because he's fat
497
00:25:11,679 --> 00:25:13,760
that's
498
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,799
it's not racist is that racist fattest
499
00:25:16,799 --> 00:25:18,640
maybe but not racist there you go and
500
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:20,640
she thinks everything i say is racist
501
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:22,080
they uh
502
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:24,080
told you it's a television show right
503
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:26,000
cameras just relax you'll be great
504
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:28,080
you're uh jose
505
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:30,390
and you are
506
00:25:30,390 --> 00:25:32,880
[Music]
507
00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:35,440
it's ridiculous i can't remember that
508
00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:36,320
um
509
00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:39,200
you know what you're you're jose right
510
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:40,720
you can be hos b
511
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:43,520
that was definitely racist no that that
512
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:45,760
one that one was that one was i'll give
513
00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:47,360
you i'll give you that one i'll give you
514
00:25:47,360 --> 00:25:48,559
that
515
00:25:48,559 --> 00:25:50,960
don't be that way dad well
516
00:25:50,960 --> 00:25:53,840
honey i'm not being any way look uh all
517
00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:55,520
i care about is whether or not he can do
518
00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:56,559
the job
519
00:25:56,559 --> 00:25:58,559
okay i know and
520
00:25:58,559 --> 00:26:00,640
if i can pronounce his name correctly on
521
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:03,039
national television for christ's sake
522
00:26:03,039 --> 00:26:05,200
why are you on my ass
523
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:08,480
about this holy [ __ ] you know what there
524
00:26:08,480 --> 00:26:11,039
there are some i i i i swear to god
525
00:26:11,039 --> 00:26:13,440
honey sometimes i close my eyes and i
526
00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:17,360
hear your mother you know what
527
00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:22,320
tell me about that locket
528
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:26,799
uh it was my mother's
529
00:26:27,360 --> 00:26:28,799
i don't like to talk about it all right
530
00:26:28,799 --> 00:26:31,360
you know what i
531
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,039
i don't mean you're just like her
532
00:26:35,039 --> 00:26:38,679
that's not what i meant
533
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:44,960
it's cool never never mind
534
00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:48,000
hello
535
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:50,559
who's that i don't know but it looks
536
00:26:50,559 --> 00:26:53,679
like he's trying to get our attention
537
00:26:53,679 --> 00:26:57,200
yo y'all about this place
538
00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,840
moving in
539
00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:00,720
yes
540
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:03,840
and no uh fixing it up south
541
00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:05,440
not saying
542
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:06,400
no sir
543
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:08,559
you from around here
544
00:27:08,559 --> 00:27:10,159
what do you say
545
00:27:10,159 --> 00:27:12,799
he asked if you're from around here no
546
00:27:12,799 --> 00:27:16,799
no no i'm from i'm from here
547
00:27:16,799 --> 00:27:19,760
lived here all my life i i've known i've
548
00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:21,039
known
549
00:27:21,039 --> 00:27:23,840
everybody that ever lived at 89.89
550
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:27,440
redstone lane that's so
551
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:28,799
what do you say
552
00:27:28,799 --> 00:27:31,440
you've known everybody who's lived here
553
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:34,480
yeah that's right
554
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:34,830
one
555
00:27:34,830 --> 00:27:37,760
[Laughter]
556
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:40,960
way only one person lived here yeah yeah
557
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:43,039
abner works
558
00:27:43,039 --> 00:27:46,799
he built this place he was an architect
559
00:27:46,799 --> 00:27:50,000
i know the whole neighborhood
560
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:51,679
whole life here
561
00:27:51,679 --> 00:27:53,200
in detroit
562
00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:55,600
hand to god it's true and to god it's
563
00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:58,600
true
564
00:27:59,450 --> 00:28:02,640
[Music]
565
00:28:03,679 --> 00:28:05,679
today's house is like an advent calendar
566
00:28:05,679 --> 00:28:07,360
every door is surprised
567
00:28:07,360 --> 00:28:09,440
all right so i love this fireplace but
568
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:11,360
not that tile so we'll pull the tile out
569
00:28:11,360 --> 00:28:14,559
yeah yeah maybe some brick yeah yeah
570
00:28:14,559 --> 00:28:16,399
yeah yeah yeah
571
00:28:16,399 --> 00:28:17,440
okay
572
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:21,200
uh all right and then we head into this
573
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:24,399
room here oh my god
574
00:28:24,399 --> 00:28:27,679
so obviously wallpaper is ripped down
575
00:28:27,679 --> 00:28:30,240
yeah yeah and then uh more work on the
576
00:28:30,240 --> 00:28:31,360
floor
577
00:28:31,360 --> 00:28:33,919
yeah yeah pull the window
578
00:28:33,919 --> 00:28:37,200
yeah yeah yeah you're mad a few words aj
579
00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:39,279
yeah yeah
580
00:28:39,279 --> 00:28:40,960
buddha
581
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:42,320
you're kind of scaring the crap out of
582
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:44,799
me right now man
583
00:28:44,799 --> 00:28:47,120
you do speak english right
584
00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:48,799
i mean please tell me you're not just
585
00:28:48,799 --> 00:28:50,559
looking at me and nodding your head and
586
00:28:50,559 --> 00:28:52,240
saying yeah because you don't understand
587
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:55,600
what i'm saying i only speak english man
588
00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:59,919
okay thank god there we go so we're on
589
00:28:59,919 --> 00:29:01,919
the same page yeah and don't say yet
590
00:29:01,919 --> 00:29:04,720
don't don't say yeah just say something
591
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:06,880
else say anything else if only for my
592
00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:08,480
peace of mind
593
00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:10,720
okay
594
00:29:11,600 --> 00:29:13,600
who in the hell put that door there
595
00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:16,559
hey there we go right yeah
596
00:29:16,559 --> 00:29:19,760
piece of crap door to nowhere hey
597
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:22,399
my man knows crap when he sees it love
598
00:29:22,399 --> 00:29:24,240
this guy you know what for that you get
599
00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:26,880
a little kiss no no oh come on just a
600
00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:29,039
little one kiss her men are gilda whoa
601
00:29:29,039 --> 00:29:31,279
who
602
00:29:31,919 --> 00:29:35,919
smells bad yeah it's a stale air
603
00:29:35,919 --> 00:29:38,000
there's no circulation down here uh
604
00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:41,840
maybe more than that mold maybe
605
00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:44,320
god damn it
606
00:29:44,320 --> 00:29:46,480
drafts in this house
607
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:47,919
all right let's do a
608
00:29:47,919 --> 00:29:51,600
you got me yes sir okay
609
00:29:52,320 --> 00:29:53,600
believe it or not
610
00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:54,799
we're gonna do some of our most
611
00:29:54,799 --> 00:29:56,480
important work down here we're gonna
612
00:29:56,480 --> 00:29:59,039
turn this into a wine cellar that's the
613
00:29:59,039 --> 00:30:00,640
kind of feature that attracts those big
614
00:30:00,640 --> 00:30:02,559
money buyers that we like
615
00:30:02,559 --> 00:30:06,559
oh hey boss yeah check this
616
00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:09,279
out oh
617
00:30:09,279 --> 00:30:10,720
oh jesus christ
618
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:11,919
[Music]
619
00:30:11,919 --> 00:30:15,440
is that dead rats disgusting
620
00:30:16,799 --> 00:30:18,240
[ __ ] what they do
621
00:30:18,240 --> 00:30:21,120
trying to leave a sinking ship
622
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:23,600
oh are the big money buyers gonna like
623
00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,840
this
624
00:30:25,919 --> 00:30:27,760
i'm getting a full-blown migraine i bet
625
00:30:27,760 --> 00:30:29,120
i'm getting a headache too all right
626
00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:30,399
let's get the hell out of here until we
627
00:30:30,399 --> 00:30:32,480
can get some lights up get some fans in
628
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:34,000
here
629
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:37,840
jesus let's go before we all get sick
630
00:30:41,810 --> 00:30:44,950
[Applause]
631
00:31:04,500 --> 00:31:08,049
[Music]
632
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:11,440
man time flies when you're having fun we
633
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:12,799
must have been in that basement a whole
634
00:31:12,799 --> 00:31:14,720
lot longer than i thought
635
00:31:14,720 --> 00:31:16,880
hey you know what just sit in the sit in
636
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:19,120
the passenger seat here okay
637
00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:20,960
just take her easy all right i got some
638
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:22,399
ibuprofen in the
639
00:31:22,399 --> 00:31:25,520
glove compartment there just
640
00:31:25,520 --> 00:31:28,080
close your eyes and
641
00:31:28,080 --> 00:31:32,279
hopefully that headache could go away
642
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:35,279
greg it's daryl
643
00:31:35,279 --> 00:31:37,039
call me
644
00:31:37,039 --> 00:31:38,720
all right
645
00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:40,399
okay
646
00:31:40,399 --> 00:31:42,320
well it's been a long day but things are
647
00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:44,240
finally moving ahead the biggest part of
648
00:31:44,240 --> 00:31:45,760
this job is going to be electric and
649
00:31:45,760 --> 00:31:47,840
luckily i've got the best man for the
650
00:31:47,840 --> 00:31:48,940
job
651
00:31:48,940 --> 00:31:50,720
[Music]
652
00:31:50,720 --> 00:31:53,440
call me bastard
653
00:31:53,440 --> 00:31:56,090
you ready to work yes
654
00:31:56,090 --> 00:31:59,480
[Music]
655
00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:04,279
lied about size of job
656
00:32:05,660 --> 00:32:09,079
[Music]
657
00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:16,989
[Music]
658
00:32:23,560 --> 00:32:27,460
[Music]
659
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:32,320
i'm surprised you're still here why is
660
00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:33,200
that
661
00:32:33,200 --> 00:32:36,799
you must know by now house is all wrong
662
00:32:36,799 --> 00:32:40,440
all kinds are broken
663
00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:44,720
see
664
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:48,480
there he is i i told you i knew him
665
00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,080
you knew this man
666
00:32:50,080 --> 00:32:52,080
that's abner wurtz
667
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:54,399
built your house
668
00:32:54,399 --> 00:32:56,720
he could do anything he set his mind to
669
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:59,279
he was a genius
670
00:32:59,279 --> 00:33:02,480
you said he was an architect no no
671
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:05,200
he was an architect he paid me to stay
672
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:06,000
away
673
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:06,720
that
674
00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:08,960
that was the last time i saw him
675
00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:10,559
before he disappeared
676
00:33:10,559 --> 00:33:13,440
you know he was an architect you know
677
00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:14,799
that's great
678
00:33:14,799 --> 00:33:17,279
nice picture no no you you keep it you
679
00:33:17,279 --> 00:33:19,120
keep it pretty lady
680
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,039
can i give you some advice sweetie
681
00:33:21,039 --> 00:33:24,279
what's that
682
00:33:24,559 --> 00:33:27,519
get out of town
683
00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:31,799
get away from 89.89
684
00:33:41,919 --> 00:33:45,200
what the hell was that i have no idea
685
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:47,440
it's a little uh
686
00:33:47,440 --> 00:33:49,919
it's a lot worse in the daylight yeah
687
00:33:49,919 --> 00:33:53,840
all right this is uh this is it
688
00:33:55,919 --> 00:33:58,240
this is like 75
689
00:33:58,240 --> 00:34:00,480
more
690
00:34:01,120 --> 00:34:03,919
whole house has to be rewired
691
00:34:03,919 --> 00:34:06,240
everything miracle display snow burn
692
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:07,760
down
693
00:34:07,760 --> 00:34:10,239
there's a lot of electrical disturbance
694
00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:13,398
in here
695
00:34:23,679 --> 00:34:25,199
so i'm guessing that's not a compliment
696
00:34:25,199 --> 00:34:28,479
to the previous electrician
697
00:34:31,639 --> 00:34:33,599
[Music]
698
00:34:33,599 --> 00:34:34,879
and this
699
00:34:34,879 --> 00:34:36,800
is my
700
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,560
favorite part of the day
701
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:39,440
oh
702
00:34:39,440 --> 00:34:40,879
ah
703
00:34:40,879 --> 00:34:42,480
okay all right all right all right i got
704
00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:45,040
a question okay get serious here okay
705
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:47,040
serious
706
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:49,119
so you're not into this
707
00:34:49,119 --> 00:34:50,800
house whipping stuff what are you
708
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:52,879
interested in then well i've been taking
709
00:34:52,879 --> 00:34:54,480
cooking classes
710
00:34:54,480 --> 00:34:56,480
cooking yes
711
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:58,160
all right roll with me here
712
00:34:58,160 --> 00:35:02,960
how is cooking like flipping a house
713
00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:04,560
well
714
00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:06,800
my teacher says
715
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:10,480
if you have the wrong ingredients
716
00:35:10,480 --> 00:35:13,599
you can't bake a good cake
717
00:35:13,599 --> 00:35:15,359
this house
718
00:35:15,359 --> 00:35:16,960
long ingredients
719
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:20,560
bad cake that is cute
720
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:22,240
do i look [ __ ] cute to you you
721
00:35:22,240 --> 00:35:24,400
[ __ ] look cute to me
722
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:25,839
but i can't say that not with your dad
723
00:35:25,839 --> 00:35:27,760
around jesus
724
00:35:27,760 --> 00:35:31,680
that dog is all a bark
725
00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:32,880
really
726
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:34,800
remember that
727
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:37,200
hey where you been
728
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:38,160
outside
729
00:35:38,160 --> 00:35:40,320
uh-huh shooting good stuff for the show
730
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:43,440
yeah really yes really hey listen what's
731
00:35:43,440 --> 00:35:45,119
that over here
732
00:35:45,119 --> 00:35:47,440
oh [ __ ]
733
00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:49,359
sorry pommel
734
00:35:49,359 --> 00:35:51,760
who gave you an air horn this is mine
735
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:53,680
and it's a reminder that i got eyes in
736
00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:55,839
the back of my head i do not want you
737
00:35:55,839 --> 00:35:57,839
anywhere near my daughter you hear me
738
00:35:57,839 --> 00:36:00,000
you [ __ ] hear me i swear to god you
739
00:36:00,000 --> 00:36:03,440
forget that i'm gonna remind you again
740
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:04,880
sorry
741
00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:06,720
are we on the same page
742
00:36:06,720 --> 00:36:10,240
no no i mean no yes yes
743
00:36:10,240 --> 00:36:11,440
yes
744
00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:12,560
yes
745
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:15,200
don't be an [ __ ] keep your paws to
746
00:36:15,200 --> 00:36:18,800
yourself god can you relax
747
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:21,119
[ __ ]
748
00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:24,560
jesus buddha and his guys are fast that
749
00:36:24,560 --> 00:36:27,839
door's gone already
750
00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:30,800
the [ __ ] is wrong with you
751
00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:33,920
oh dude you said jesus
752
00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:36,880
and buddha yeah so
753
00:36:36,880 --> 00:36:38,960
jesus and buddha
754
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:40,880
are you high
755
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:43,680
or are you just like this all the time
756
00:36:43,680 --> 00:36:45,359
the latter let me guess you're probably
757
00:36:45,359 --> 00:36:47,119
hungry now too
758
00:36:47,119 --> 00:36:50,079
well yeah yeah what a surprise i'm
759
00:36:50,079 --> 00:36:52,560
hungry all right jesus christ all right
760
00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:54,320
let's get some pizza in the pothead and
761
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:55,680
maybe he'll
762
00:36:55,680 --> 00:36:56,960
shut up
763
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:59,040
oh oh you know what else we hey hey hey
764
00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:01,200
hey maybe we can get jesus to turn water
765
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:02,320
into wine
766
00:37:02,320 --> 00:37:04,560
there we go you are out of your [ __ ]
767
00:37:04,560 --> 00:37:06,839
mind you know that
768
00:37:06,839 --> 00:37:08,800
hey
769
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:11,760
hey look at that look at that good
770
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:13,680
russian handiwork
771
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:16,960
hey pavel you magnificent son of a [ __ ]
772
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:19,200
good
773
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:21,040
captioning not job
774
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:36,960
with one big push we're gonna be able to
775
00:37:36,960 --> 00:37:39,440
make up the time that greg cost us and
776
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:41,839
like my favorite president used to say
777
00:37:41,839 --> 00:37:45,440
you gotta stay the course
778
00:37:49,359 --> 00:37:52,320
get some food in you please laughing boy
779
00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:55,359
hey sweetie how you doing
780
00:37:55,359 --> 00:37:56,400
oh
781
00:37:56,400 --> 00:37:58,560
your headache gun not yet
782
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,480
all right well you know what you need a
783
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:01,839
little bit of food a little bit of
784
00:38:01,839 --> 00:38:04,640
protein yeah darryl where's pavel he's
785
00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:06,400
gonna get cold pizza
786
00:38:06,400 --> 00:38:08,480
ah pavel's still working he likes to
787
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:09,839
plow through
788
00:38:09,839 --> 00:38:12,320
love a man that plows through i know
789
00:38:12,320 --> 00:38:15,960
i've been to your website
790
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,560
you know what awesome job on that door
791
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:23,520
man awesome job that's all right
792
00:38:23,520 --> 00:38:24,640
well you know what these guys were
793
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:27,390
saying that we were in the basement
794
00:38:27,390 --> 00:38:29,119
[Music]
795
00:38:29,119 --> 00:38:33,160
oh like yeah like eight minutes
796
00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:35,520
wait
797
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:38,079
what dorm
798
00:38:38,090 --> 00:38:41,249
[Music]
799
00:38:43,359 --> 00:38:46,480
god damn it hold on to this
800
00:38:46,480 --> 00:38:48,960
bobbo
801
00:38:51,599 --> 00:38:54,880
dammit it smells bad up here
802
00:38:56,240 --> 00:39:00,359
can't see [ __ ] in here
803
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:05,040
oh jesus christ jesus christ problem
804
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:07,359
once his life god damn it back up back
805
00:39:07,359 --> 00:39:09,440
up good god [ __ ]
806
00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:10,160
pablo you
807
00:39:10,160 --> 00:39:13,280
[Applause]
808
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:14,400
my okay
809
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:16,720
god damn it okay we got to get him up
810
00:39:16,720 --> 00:39:18,800
can you feel your legs
811
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:21,119
can you get up yes
812
00:39:21,119 --> 00:39:23,119
joe help kravitz grab his arm hold him
813
00:39:23,119 --> 00:39:24,640
up he's lying
814
00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:26,240
i'm gonna try and stand you up all right
815
00:39:26,240 --> 00:39:27,280
buddy
816
00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:30,720
okay hang on it's gonna be fine
817
00:39:31,359 --> 00:39:34,839
jesus christ
818
00:39:56,079 --> 00:39:58,800
you know what i don't believe in luck
819
00:39:58,800 --> 00:40:01,200
good or bad
820
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:02,800
but i got no explanation for what's
821
00:40:02,800 --> 00:40:05,200
going on
822
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:07,359
is pablo going to be okay
823
00:40:07,359 --> 00:40:09,440
i don't know
824
00:40:09,440 --> 00:40:10,640
probably doesn't help took the
825
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:14,079
paramedics an hour to get here
826
00:40:15,490 --> 00:40:19,040
[Applause]
827
00:40:19,040 --> 00:40:23,560
and that is how we do that
828
00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:29,320
oh
829
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:37,449
[Music]
830
00:40:40,630 --> 00:40:44,159
[Music]
831
00:40:51,920 --> 00:40:54,240
ah [ __ ]
832
00:40:54,240 --> 00:40:56,560
oh
833
00:40:57,520 --> 00:40:59,359
why the hell didn't you lock up last
834
00:40:59,359 --> 00:41:01,920
night we did lock up obviously you
835
00:41:01,920 --> 00:41:03,280
didn't
836
00:41:03,280 --> 00:41:05,200
don't piss on my head and tell me it's
837
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:07,280
raining hey man i don't let anybody piss
838
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:10,400
on my work [ __ ] up my show dad god
839
00:41:10,400 --> 00:41:12,079
damn it all right
840
00:41:12,079 --> 00:41:14,319
okay
841
00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:17,359
all right we just
842
00:41:17,359 --> 00:41:18,960
we'll have to get some security cameras
843
00:41:18,960 --> 00:41:21,839
up in here
844
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:27,040
dude you are gonna give everyone a heart
845
00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:28,800
attack i warned you dick face didn't i
846
00:41:28,800 --> 00:41:31,200
warn you [ __ ] i got eyes you mind
847
00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:32,960
yours dad
848
00:41:32,960 --> 00:41:36,079
it's okay and what is with the fog horn
849
00:41:36,079 --> 00:41:37,599
you know what what's what what's with
850
00:41:37,599 --> 00:41:38,800
this
851
00:41:38,800 --> 00:41:40,480
you know what y you mind your p's and
852
00:41:40,480 --> 00:41:42,720
q's i don't even know what that means
853
00:41:42,720 --> 00:41:46,079
guys guys in here
854
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:48,240
hey thor be sure you get this in focus
855
00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:50,160
okay
856
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:53,520
you got that really mature dad
857
00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:57,520
oh god damn it what more of this [ __ ]
858
00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:59,440
god
859
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,079
could be satanists yeah except satanists
860
00:42:02,079 --> 00:42:04,319
don't exist
861
00:42:04,319 --> 00:42:06,079
only in the movies man
862
00:42:06,079 --> 00:42:08,800
no i'm pretty sure satanists do exist in
863
00:42:08,800 --> 00:42:10,000
real life
864
00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:12,000
so what you want to you want to get a
865
00:42:12,000 --> 00:42:14,720
monk yeah i think that'd be a good idea
866
00:42:14,720 --> 00:42:16,400
got you mexican
867
00:42:16,400 --> 00:42:18,319
how about a priest do an exorcism you
868
00:42:18,319 --> 00:42:20,000
know some kind of catholic [ __ ] like
869
00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:23,040
that i'm not mexican or catholic i'm a
870
00:42:23,040 --> 00:42:24,880
buddhist why'd you think they call me
871
00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:26,240
buddha
872
00:42:26,240 --> 00:42:28,079
look i think everyone would be a lot
873
00:42:28,079 --> 00:42:30,480
happier if we did this too okay
874
00:42:30,480 --> 00:42:32,240
make everyone feel better about working
875
00:42:32,240 --> 00:42:34,960
here except we don't have time for this
876
00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:36,720
[ __ ]
877
00:42:36,720 --> 00:42:38,400
especially since this is just kids
878
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:40,079
screwing around
879
00:42:40,079 --> 00:42:42,240
you need to rally the troops boss okay
880
00:42:42,240 --> 00:42:43,599
make sure everyone sees this thing
881
00:42:43,599 --> 00:42:46,319
through fine fine all right you got one
882
00:42:46,319 --> 00:42:47,200
hour
883
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:49,119
one hour for your voodoo why don't you
884
00:42:49,119 --> 00:42:51,200
get a little more animated are you
885
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:52,960
[ __ ] kidding me yeah you want this
886
00:42:52,960 --> 00:42:54,640
more animated uh-huh we want to portray
887
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:56,640
you like an angry freak railing on your
888
00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:58,960
minority workers that's what america
889
00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:01,599
loves to see
890
00:43:04,400 --> 00:43:05,839
all right you know what
891
00:43:05,839 --> 00:43:08,240
i'm gonna go call the cops
892
00:43:08,240 --> 00:43:10,000
you can animate yourself in my [ __ ]
893
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:13,000
poll
894
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:15,280
well
895
00:43:15,280 --> 00:43:16,800
the house still looks like the set of
896
00:43:16,800 --> 00:43:18,960
the rocky horror picture show but we're
897
00:43:18,960 --> 00:43:20,720
gonna turn this around
898
00:43:20,720 --> 00:43:23,359
yeah what hey
899
00:43:23,359 --> 00:43:26,480
cavalry's here all right good to see you
900
00:43:26,480 --> 00:43:28,720
all right daryl masters thank you so
901
00:43:28,720 --> 00:43:30,640
much look at this look at this they hit
902
00:43:30,640 --> 00:43:33,440
us in here right all through here and
903
00:43:33,440 --> 00:43:35,119
then of course you know we got we got
904
00:43:35,119 --> 00:43:36,160
this
905
00:43:36,160 --> 00:43:38,079
that's it that's it
906
00:43:38,079 --> 00:43:39,839
well they can spell at least right
907
00:43:39,839 --> 00:43:41,119
that's typical yeah the the english
908
00:43:41,119 --> 00:43:43,200
majors call me out here for some spray
909
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,040
paint
910
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:46,800
yeah yeah it's it's kids
911
00:43:46,800 --> 00:43:48,240
they like to break
912
00:43:48,240 --> 00:43:49,599
it's vandalism you call me if something
913
00:43:49,599 --> 00:43:50,880
real happens
914
00:43:50,880 --> 00:43:54,560
okay thank you whoa excuse me that
915
00:43:54,560 --> 00:43:55,599
that's it
916
00:43:55,599 --> 00:43:57,520
so if they come back and they they they
917
00:43:57,520 --> 00:43:59,599
trash my place again i can
918
00:43:59,599 --> 00:44:01,200
what you can put in a complaint if
919
00:44:01,200 --> 00:44:02,480
something serious happens somebody gets
920
00:44:02,480 --> 00:44:03,839
hurt somebody gets maimed something is
921
00:44:03,839 --> 00:44:06,079
stolen you call me this is detroit we
922
00:44:06,079 --> 00:44:07,520
don't have time to run around messing
923
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:09,200
around with spray paint and some broken
924
00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:11,119
windows no that's that's great thank you
925
00:44:11,119 --> 00:44:13,599
for making me wait six hours for that
926
00:44:13,599 --> 00:44:16,480
fine investigative work matlock
927
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:18,319
[ __ ] me they don't show that on cops do
928
00:44:18,319 --> 00:44:19,370
they
929
00:44:19,370 --> 00:44:20,960
[Music]
930
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:22,560
we didn't do a halloween episode last
931
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:24,240
year they didn't air new programming in
932
00:44:24,240 --> 00:44:26,319
october last year channels with
933
00:44:26,319 --> 00:44:28,720
halloween programming do great sci-fi
934
00:44:28,720 --> 00:44:30,560
clean up was drawing
935
00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:33,359
sharknado
936
00:44:33,599 --> 00:44:35,680
love that movie
937
00:44:35,680 --> 00:44:37,920
well they gained a million eyeballs a
938
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:41,440
million eyeballs one million one million
939
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:42,880
well
940
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:44,880
[ __ ] a let's do a goddamn halloween
941
00:44:44,880 --> 00:44:45,920
episode
942
00:44:45,920 --> 00:44:47,760
all right i get more money for that
943
00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:49,040
right
944
00:44:49,040 --> 00:44:49,760
no
945
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:51,680
what but you get to spend the night in
946
00:44:51,680 --> 00:44:52,720
the house
947
00:44:52,720 --> 00:44:54,720
in case the vet doesn't come back
948
00:44:54,720 --> 00:44:56,000
um
949
00:44:56,000 --> 00:44:57,839
[ __ ] that
950
00:44:57,839 --> 00:45:01,680
[ __ ] mother [ __ ]
951
00:45:02,240 --> 00:45:04,800
jesus christ
952
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:07,680
look you and buddha are gonna guard the
953
00:45:07,680 --> 00:45:11,040
house all night it will be so great the
954
00:45:11,040 --> 00:45:12,319
[ __ ] we got to spend the night in the
955
00:45:12,319 --> 00:45:14,160
house for did we just spend an ass load
956
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:15,920
of money put security cameras everywhere
957
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:17,920
yeah that sounds like a scintillating
958
00:45:17,920 --> 00:45:20,800
show tune in to mastering disaster to
959
00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:23,200
see freaking shitty security
960
00:45:23,200 --> 00:45:24,960
all right fine
961
00:45:24,960 --> 00:45:27,359
fine
962
00:45:29,599 --> 00:45:31,040
what this means
963
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:32,560
is that buddha and i are gonna have to
964
00:45:32,560 --> 00:45:34,240
stay here every night and keep an eye on
965
00:45:34,240 --> 00:45:35,280
the place
966
00:45:35,280 --> 00:45:37,040
can't have anybody else coming in here
967
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:39,359
and messing us up again guys
968
00:45:39,359 --> 00:45:41,680
you're here oh fantastic okay okay okay
969
00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:43,440
listen now when they say there's nothing
970
00:45:43,440 --> 00:45:44,480
wrong with the place that means
971
00:45:44,480 --> 00:45:46,160
everybody shuts up we go right back to
972
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:49,680
work right sure boss
973
00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:52,400
i'm gonna remind you of that next time
974
00:45:52,400 --> 00:45:56,920
somebody [ __ ] about a slam door
975
00:45:58,210 --> 00:46:02,070
[Music]
976
00:46:02,070 --> 00:46:02,850
[Applause]
977
00:46:02,850 --> 00:46:05,200
[Music]
978
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:08,160
i never thought i'd live to see this
979
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:09,760
daryl doesn't even move from the theory
980
00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:12,920
of gravity
981
00:46:17,630 --> 00:46:21,079
[Music]
982
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:24,240
is there a problem
983
00:46:24,240 --> 00:46:25,920
this place
984
00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:28,640
it's like it's not even here
985
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:30,800
what
986
00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:32,880
this is ridiculous this is [ __ ]
987
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:34,640
awesome getting coverage of every second
988
00:46:34,640 --> 00:46:36,800
of them
989
00:46:37,599 --> 00:46:39,200
no echoes
990
00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:41,440
i don't know why or how
991
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:43,520
there is something wrong
992
00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:45,440
you know what honey don't pay any
993
00:46:45,440 --> 00:46:47,280
attention to anything these jokers are
994
00:46:47,280 --> 00:46:48,480
saying
995
00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:50,880
please a little respect
996
00:46:50,880 --> 00:46:53,040
please please try once more please help
997
00:46:53,040 --> 00:46:55,599
us for your own sakes
998
00:46:55,599 --> 00:46:58,480
leave this house
999
00:47:00,880 --> 00:47:05,359
this is the best day of my entire career
1000
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:07,599
what
1001
00:47:07,599 --> 00:47:09,119
the hell
1002
00:47:09,119 --> 00:47:11,839
was that
1003
00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:15,920
they didn't want to stay here
1004
00:47:15,920 --> 00:47:17,920
no [ __ ]
1005
00:47:17,920 --> 00:47:20,319
this is how you rally the troops this
1006
00:47:20,319 --> 00:47:22,240
isn't good man they didn't like the
1007
00:47:22,240 --> 00:47:25,839
house that's not good
1008
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:28,880
this is a [ __ ] joke
1009
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:30,560
i got a business to run we can't be
1010
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:34,160
wasting time on superstitious [ __ ]
1011
00:47:34,160 --> 00:47:36,560
get the [ __ ] out of my way whoa whoa
1012
00:47:36,560 --> 00:47:38,079
whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa don't do that
1013
00:47:38,079 --> 00:47:40,240
oh see
1014
00:47:40,240 --> 00:47:42,720
and don't tell me what i can't god damn
1015
00:47:42,720 --> 00:47:43,599
it
1016
00:47:43,599 --> 00:47:46,640
boss they're monks they know stuff [ __ ]
1017
00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:48,800
god talks to them we should listen i'm
1018
00:47:48,800 --> 00:47:50,160
talking now
1019
00:47:50,160 --> 00:47:51,599
and you know what i want to talk to
1020
00:47:51,599 --> 00:47:54,000
everybody get everybody in here we're
1021
00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:55,440
here
1022
00:47:55,440 --> 00:47:58,720
i have had it up to here with this crap
1023
00:47:58,720 --> 00:48:02,079
we have got a job to do and we are gonna
1024
00:48:02,079 --> 00:48:03,280
do it
1025
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:05,359
evil spirits are not
1026
00:48:05,359 --> 00:48:08,640
if i have to personally kick each and
1027
00:48:08,640 --> 00:48:12,920
every one of you in the ass
1028
00:48:20,960 --> 00:48:22,880
so no
1029
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:24,240
i'm not thrilled with the way things
1030
00:48:24,240 --> 00:48:26,079
went down with those
1031
00:48:26,079 --> 00:48:28,079
monks
1032
00:48:28,079 --> 00:48:29,760
those
1033
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:31,359
[ __ ] monks
1034
00:48:31,359 --> 00:48:33,440
putting ideas in my guys heads you know
1035
00:48:33,440 --> 00:48:34,720
what
1036
00:48:34,720 --> 00:48:37,040
seriously you you shave your head you
1037
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:39,359
put on a robe and
1038
00:48:39,359 --> 00:48:40,800
what suddenly you're supposed to know
1039
00:48:40,800 --> 00:48:41,839
something
1040
00:48:41,839 --> 00:48:43,599
any idiot can shave his head and put on
1041
00:48:43,599 --> 00:48:45,520
a robe uh
1042
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:46,480
gandhi
1043
00:48:46,480 --> 00:48:49,440
had a shaved head and wore rope uh and
1044
00:48:49,440 --> 00:48:52,480
the dalai lama and your point is
1045
00:48:52,480 --> 00:48:54,160
and by the way how many houses have they
1046
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:56,559
flipped and oh my god could you be any
1047
00:48:56,559 --> 00:48:59,599
more in my shot you need to see rebecca
1048
00:48:59,599 --> 00:49:01,040
she's acting
1049
00:49:01,040 --> 00:49:02,800
weird
1050
00:49:02,800 --> 00:49:06,079
wait a minute what are you talking about
1051
00:49:08,559 --> 00:49:13,410
yo daryl like she's just standing here
1052
00:49:13,410 --> 00:49:16,550
[Music]
1053
00:49:16,960 --> 00:49:20,480
honey what's the matter
1054
00:49:21,440 --> 00:49:23,599
rebecca
1055
00:49:23,599 --> 00:49:24,960
hey
1056
00:49:24,960 --> 00:49:26,400
hey honey
1057
00:49:26,400 --> 00:49:28,160
honey come on you got to pull it
1058
00:49:28,160 --> 00:49:29,920
together here you can't scare me hey hey
1059
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:32,079
hey hey i just i
1060
00:49:32,079 --> 00:49:35,920
rebecca please are you okay are you
1061
00:49:35,920 --> 00:49:37,040
i'm
1062
00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:40,160
what are you staring at honey
1063
00:49:40,319 --> 00:49:42,400
the hell is this
1064
00:49:42,400 --> 00:49:44,319
i didn't notice this before me neither
1065
00:49:44,319 --> 00:49:46,800
oh would you stop [ __ ] around stop
1066
00:49:46,800 --> 00:49:48,400
what this looks just like the closet
1067
00:49:48,400 --> 00:49:49,760
door you pulled out of the front room
1068
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:51,119
downstairs
1069
00:49:51,119 --> 00:49:54,800
boss we haven't touched that door
1070
00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:59,119
and it's locked what kind of idiot puts
1071
00:49:59,119 --> 00:50:02,480
useless doors all around the house
1072
00:50:02,480 --> 00:50:05,760
honey honey honey jesus honey honey oh
1073
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:08,319
my god oh my god honey put your head
1074
00:50:08,319 --> 00:50:12,960
back put your head back okay god okay
1075
00:50:20,960 --> 00:50:23,920
oh [ __ ]
1076
00:50:24,400 --> 00:50:26,640
look don't tell them but i i can't blame
1077
00:50:26,640 --> 00:50:28,720
them for not wanting to work here
1078
00:50:28,720 --> 00:50:30,240
i mean this place is starting to make my
1079
00:50:30,240 --> 00:50:32,880
skin crawl
1080
00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:34,880
god damn it i'm good i'm going to go
1081
00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:36,559
bankrupt and i'm going to lose my
1082
00:50:36,559 --> 00:50:40,680
[ __ ] show all in one week
1083
00:50:42,410 --> 00:50:43,760
[Music]
1084
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:46,480
are you gonna take her to prom
1085
00:50:46,480 --> 00:50:49,119
way not cool
1086
00:50:49,280 --> 00:50:51,359
i guess i got two more trail
1087
00:50:51,359 --> 00:50:52,839
that's not
1088
00:50:52,839 --> 00:50:56,160
fair you know
1089
00:50:56,160 --> 00:50:58,400
she was institutionalized for a year
1090
00:50:58,400 --> 00:51:00,960
after her mom died
1091
00:51:00,960 --> 00:51:02,400
daryl watches her like a hot because
1092
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:03,920
he's afraid that it's just a matter of
1093
00:51:03,920 --> 00:51:05,440
time before she goes off the deep end
1094
00:51:05,440 --> 00:51:07,680
too
1095
00:51:07,760 --> 00:51:10,160
wow
1096
00:51:10,240 --> 00:51:11,680
and how long have you been waiting to
1097
00:51:11,680 --> 00:51:13,280
drop that on me
1098
00:51:13,280 --> 00:51:15,200
um
1099
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:18,200
weeks
1100
00:51:20,230 --> 00:51:23,470
[Music]
1101
00:51:23,470 --> 00:51:26,610
[Applause]
1102
00:51:26,880 --> 00:51:30,130
[Music]
1103
00:51:34,640 --> 00:51:38,480
hey hey lady what you doing
1104
00:51:39,599 --> 00:51:41,520
have you looked at this mirror
1105
00:51:41,520 --> 00:51:42,640
sure
1106
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:44,480
it's one of your dad's favorite selling
1107
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:46,559
points
1108
00:51:46,559 --> 00:51:49,040
notice anything about it um that you're
1109
00:51:49,040 --> 00:51:50,880
just as beautiful in the reflection as
1110
00:51:50,880 --> 00:51:53,520
you are in real life
1111
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:55,760
i'm being serious
1112
00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:57,650
what are you getting at
1113
00:51:57,650 --> 00:52:00,319
[Music]
1114
00:52:00,319 --> 00:52:01,680
nothing
1115
00:52:01,680 --> 00:52:05,480
never mind everybody
1116
00:52:07,700 --> 00:52:10,770
[Music]
1117
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:27,000
um
1118
00:52:29,220 --> 00:52:33,550
[Applause]
1119
00:52:37,520 --> 00:52:40,520
um
1120
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:47,670
[Applause]
1121
00:52:52,260 --> 00:52:56,929
[Music]
1122
00:53:04,940 --> 00:53:05,800
[Music]
1123
00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:09,389
[Applause]
1124
00:53:16,760 --> 00:53:19,810
[Music]
1125
00:53:19,810 --> 00:53:22,980
[Applause]
1126
00:53:24,700 --> 00:53:27,760
[Music]
1127
00:53:27,760 --> 00:53:30,240
i don't think i should pull over
1128
00:53:30,240 --> 00:53:33,040
with a strange man a strange man that
1129
00:53:33,040 --> 00:53:35,040
you have worked with for a year and a
1130
00:53:35,040 --> 00:53:37,920
half on the world's most dysfunctional
1131
00:53:37,920 --> 00:53:41,720
reality tv show
1132
00:53:42,079 --> 00:53:44,480
this week on mastering disaster we'll be
1133
00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:46,720
turning a landfill into
1134
00:53:46,720 --> 00:53:49,359
a prize-winning guest house
1135
00:53:49,359 --> 00:53:51,280
and that's how we do that
1136
00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:54,880
and to save money i'll pay my crew and
1137
00:53:54,880 --> 00:53:58,960
pizza and that's how we got
1138
00:54:00,720 --> 00:54:01,839
okay
1139
00:54:01,839 --> 00:54:04,240
i pulled over
1140
00:54:04,240 --> 00:54:05,440
what are you gonna show me that's gonna
1141
00:54:05,440 --> 00:54:06,720
make today
1142
00:54:06,720 --> 00:54:18,500
[Music]
1143
00:54:21,390 --> 00:54:34,810
[Music]
1144
00:54:40,590 --> 00:54:43,639
[Music]
1145
00:54:48,559 --> 00:54:51,880
don't talk about
1146
00:54:57,440 --> 00:55:00,440
so
1147
00:55:00,990 --> 00:55:05,599
[Music]
1148
00:55:06,160 --> 00:55:07,660
um
1149
00:55:07,660 --> 00:55:19,579
[Music]
1150
00:55:30,520 --> 00:55:32,160
[Music]
1151
00:55:32,160 --> 00:55:34,880
i'm daryl masters and
1152
00:55:34,880 --> 00:55:36,960
why the [ __ ] am i spending the night
1153
00:55:36,960 --> 00:55:39,440
with you guys
1154
00:55:39,440 --> 00:55:43,040
ah with cold coffee all right
1155
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:44,800
on me
1156
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:46,319
buddha and i are gonna split the night
1157
00:55:46,319 --> 00:55:48,640
into shifts just to make sure nobody
1158
00:55:48,640 --> 00:55:51,760
comes back to vandalize the house oh
1159
00:55:51,760 --> 00:55:53,839
and here's what's uh waiting for anyone
1160
00:55:53,839 --> 00:55:57,280
who thinks they can sneak back in here
1161
00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:59,119
cubans are amongst the greatest baseball
1162
00:55:59,119 --> 00:56:01,200
players in history
1163
00:56:01,200 --> 00:56:03,119
well except you're mexican i'm not
1164
00:56:03,119 --> 00:56:04,880
mexican
1165
00:56:04,880 --> 00:56:06,400
you're not no
1166
00:56:06,400 --> 00:56:09,359
i was born in camaguey man
1167
00:56:09,359 --> 00:56:10,960
where the hell is that
1168
00:56:10,960 --> 00:56:11,920
cuba
1169
00:56:11,920 --> 00:56:13,280
it's cuba
1170
00:56:13,280 --> 00:56:15,680
since when are cubans buddhists
1171
00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:16,799
oh
1172
00:56:16,799 --> 00:56:19,359
just [ __ ] with me now
1173
00:56:19,359 --> 00:56:21,040
hey you know what you're really
1174
00:56:21,040 --> 00:56:23,760
different in person
1175
00:56:23,760 --> 00:56:25,040
now is that something a buddhist would
1176
00:56:25,040 --> 00:56:27,040
say
1177
00:56:27,040 --> 00:56:29,040
just being honest kind of insulted
1178
00:56:29,040 --> 00:56:31,920
buddhism is honesty
1179
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:34,160
well then i got a little buddhism to lay
1180
00:56:34,160 --> 00:56:36,559
on you pal we got a long night ahead all
1181
00:56:36,559 --> 00:56:38,960
right don't [ __ ] with me
1182
00:56:38,960 --> 00:56:40,880
yep we're gonna catch the guys
1183
00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:42,330
come on
1184
00:56:42,330 --> 00:57:05,250
[Music]
1185
00:57:05,250 --> 00:57:07,359
[Applause]
1186
00:57:07,359 --> 00:57:09,119
i guess we gave it about another hour
1187
00:57:09,119 --> 00:57:11,040
yeah
1188
00:57:11,040 --> 00:57:14,319
wake boot up for a shift
1189
00:57:15,760 --> 00:57:19,040
[Applause]
1190
00:57:19,040 --> 00:57:21,520
hear that yeah
1191
00:57:21,520 --> 00:57:23,200
i love that sound man
1192
00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:25,359
i love that sound
1193
00:57:25,359 --> 00:57:28,160
it's the sound of an old house
1194
00:57:28,160 --> 00:57:32,400
my friend it's like a galleon at sea
1195
00:57:32,400 --> 00:57:34,880
creaks and it groans as the house shifts
1196
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:37,119
on its foundation
1197
00:57:37,119 --> 00:57:39,040
you know they're made to do that
1198
00:57:39,040 --> 00:57:41,040
the reed that bends with the wind
1199
00:57:41,040 --> 00:57:43,760
doesn't break
1200
00:57:44,160 --> 00:57:47,119
the [ __ ] is that supposed to be
1201
00:57:47,119 --> 00:57:50,880
who's that what was that i don't know
1202
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:53,119
i
1203
00:57:53,440 --> 00:57:55,520
don't know but i think we need to go
1204
00:57:55,520 --> 00:57:58,160
find out
1205
00:58:01,920 --> 00:58:03,920
come on man can you be a little quieter
1206
00:58:03,920 --> 00:58:08,359
it's like a [ __ ] herd of elephants
1207
00:58:10,880 --> 00:58:12,240
okay so
1208
00:58:12,240 --> 00:58:13,839
we think we may have heard something out
1209
00:58:13,839 --> 00:58:15,839
here so we're gonna try and scare
1210
00:58:15,839 --> 00:58:17,839
whoever it is off
1211
00:58:17,839 --> 00:58:21,680
oh jesus christ really i'm sorry i guess
1212
00:58:21,680 --> 00:58:23,839
buddhas aren't ninjas huh
1213
00:58:23,839 --> 00:58:26,480
there's someone over there [ __ ] get go
1214
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:30,760
around the back of the house cut him off
1215
00:58:31,460 --> 00:58:34,599
[Music]
1216
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:36,830
there he is
1217
00:58:36,830 --> 00:58:39,920
[Music]
1218
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:41,430
[ __ ]
1219
00:58:41,430 --> 00:58:45,140
[Music]
1220
00:58:47,570 --> 00:58:50,679
[Music]
1221
00:58:54,790 --> 00:58:57,969
[Applause]
1222
00:59:02,640 --> 00:59:05,359
what is the matter with you oh sorry
1223
00:59:05,359 --> 00:59:07,359
i could have killed you man son of a
1224
00:59:07,359 --> 00:59:10,240
[ __ ] what are you doing out here
1225
00:59:10,240 --> 00:59:13,040
ah don't tell me let me guess was it joe
1226
00:59:13,040 --> 00:59:13,839
uh
1227
00:59:13,839 --> 00:59:16,000
[ __ ] was it joe
1228
00:59:16,000 --> 00:59:17,599
[ __ ] man
1229
00:59:17,599 --> 00:59:18,559
yeah
1230
00:59:18,559 --> 00:59:20,079
was it
1231
00:59:20,079 --> 00:59:22,480
[ __ ] yeah dude she thought it would be
1232
00:59:22,480 --> 00:59:24,240
good for the [ __ ] halloween episode
1233
00:59:24,240 --> 00:59:28,720
man god damn it god damn it god damn it
1234
00:59:28,720 --> 00:59:31,839
stupid son of a [ __ ] hey she's a girl
1235
00:59:31,839 --> 00:59:34,480
i'm sorry i meant [ __ ] hey
1236
00:59:34,480 --> 00:59:37,280
uh hey hey daryl
1237
00:59:37,280 --> 00:59:38,559
you know um
1238
00:59:38,559 --> 00:59:39,920
we're gonna need some kind of footage to
1239
00:59:39,920 --> 00:59:42,640
put a cap on this thing man
1240
00:59:42,640 --> 00:59:44,480
don't be an [ __ ]
1241
00:59:44,480 --> 00:59:47,839
hey i'm just trying to do my job
1242
00:59:48,079 --> 00:59:49,680
yeah i tell you what should i knock the
1243
00:59:49,680 --> 00:59:51,599
part out of that [ __ ] perfect head of
1244
00:59:51,599 --> 00:59:52,720
hair is
1245
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:56,400
are you rolling i'm real okay
1246
00:59:56,880 --> 00:59:57,680
well
1247
00:59:57,680 --> 00:59:59,200
we didn't end up seeing anyone in the
1248
00:59:59,200 --> 01:00:02,000
backyard but i think we may have scared
1249
01:00:02,000 --> 01:00:05,440
off a blonde weasel very rare in detroit
1250
01:00:05,440 --> 01:00:07,280
very rare
1251
01:00:07,280 --> 01:00:09,599
in any case if anyone decides to come
1252
01:00:09,599 --> 01:00:11,680
back we're ready for
1253
01:00:11,680 --> 01:00:15,240
that right
1254
01:00:22,260 --> 01:00:25,389
[Music]
1255
01:00:34,240 --> 01:00:36,880
[ __ ] house
1256
01:00:36,880 --> 01:00:38,720
i swear to god feel like i've invested
1257
01:00:38,720 --> 01:00:41,599
in the [ __ ] titanic dad
1258
01:00:41,599 --> 01:00:43,359
breathe
1259
01:00:43,359 --> 01:00:45,760
you shouldn't be smoking anyways
1260
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:47,839
you want me to quit fine i don't need to
1261
01:00:47,839 --> 01:00:49,119
smoke
1262
01:00:49,119 --> 01:00:50,319
done
1263
01:00:50,319 --> 01:00:52,640
gone
1264
01:00:54,839 --> 01:00:58,720
what i just had a flashback of uh
1265
01:00:58,720 --> 01:01:01,520
you me and mom at baskin-robbins
1266
01:01:01,520 --> 01:01:03,040
you were desperately trying to quit
1267
01:01:03,040 --> 01:01:06,079
smoking and she caught you sneaking one
1268
01:01:06,079 --> 01:01:08,960
and was pissed
1269
01:01:08,960 --> 01:01:10,319
you asked the kid behind the counter if
1270
01:01:10,319 --> 01:01:12,480
they had cigarette flavored ice cream
1271
01:01:12,480 --> 01:01:15,599
and she thought that was funny
1272
01:01:15,599 --> 01:01:16,770
remember that
1273
01:01:16,770 --> 01:01:20,000
[Laughter]
1274
01:01:20,000 --> 01:01:20,720
no
1275
01:01:20,720 --> 01:01:22,319
no i
1276
01:01:22,319 --> 01:01:25,359
i remember that it wasn't even funny but
1277
01:01:25,359 --> 01:01:27,520
she laughed and i laughed and that made
1278
01:01:27,520 --> 01:01:30,000
you laugh
1279
01:01:31,340 --> 01:01:37,680
[Music]
1280
01:01:37,680 --> 01:01:39,680
you did that on purpose
1281
01:01:39,680 --> 01:01:43,599
did what you know what
1282
01:01:43,680 --> 01:01:46,480
making me laugh
1283
01:01:46,480 --> 01:01:48,559
distracting me with some dumb story
1284
01:01:48,559 --> 01:01:52,040
about your mom
1285
01:01:53,119 --> 01:01:55,920
those are great days yeah
1286
01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:57,599
soon we'll be laughing about this place
1287
01:01:57,599 --> 01:01:59,760
too
1288
01:02:00,880 --> 01:02:05,240
i hope you're right about that
1289
01:02:06,880 --> 01:02:08,640
what what's up
1290
01:02:08,640 --> 01:02:11,280
you have a map
1291
01:02:13,640 --> 01:02:16,720
[Music]
1292
01:02:16,720 --> 01:02:19,720
amigo
1293
01:02:20,079 --> 01:02:22,799
gonna be mad at you
1294
01:02:22,799 --> 01:02:24,319
this is his favorite part of the house
1295
01:02:24,319 --> 01:02:24,930
man
1296
01:02:24,930 --> 01:02:28,559
[Music]
1297
01:02:28,559 --> 01:02:29,839
you on break
1298
01:02:29,839 --> 01:02:33,200
no i got you boss go shoot television
1299
01:02:33,200 --> 01:02:35,040
what
1300
01:02:35,040 --> 01:02:37,520
oh [ __ ] off
1301
01:02:37,520 --> 01:02:39,359
are you kidding me
1302
01:02:39,359 --> 01:02:41,839
which one of you two broke this nobody
1303
01:02:41,839 --> 01:02:45,760
nobody i think somebody god damn it
1304
01:02:45,760 --> 01:02:46,839
i show
1305
01:02:46,839 --> 01:02:48,640
you
1306
01:02:48,640 --> 01:02:50,319
oh my god
1307
01:02:50,319 --> 01:02:52,720
let me know
1308
01:02:53,920 --> 01:02:55,520
this is a bad time for me to say that i
1309
01:02:55,520 --> 01:02:57,200
don't like this mirror either
1310
01:02:57,200 --> 01:03:01,880
[ __ ] me i thought you were the smart one
1311
01:03:05,359 --> 01:03:08,000
looks good right
1312
01:03:08,000 --> 01:03:10,000
yeah
1313
01:03:10,000 --> 01:03:12,480
would you say it's secure
1314
01:03:12,480 --> 01:03:13,920
yes
1315
01:03:13,920 --> 01:03:15,119
do you ever think someone's trying to
1316
01:03:15,119 --> 01:03:16,400
tell us something
1317
01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:18,720
maybe i hired the wrong people
1318
01:03:18,720 --> 01:03:21,680
oh i swear to god if if we're like
1319
01:03:21,680 --> 01:03:23,440
waiting for the virgin of guadalupe to
1320
01:03:23,440 --> 01:03:24,799
appear i'm gonna punch you in the
1321
01:03:24,799 --> 01:03:28,200
[ __ ] head
1322
01:03:30,820 --> 01:03:33,989
[Music]
1323
01:03:37,839 --> 01:03:38,640
whoa
1324
01:03:38,640 --> 01:03:40,720
i am telling you that is not a normal
1325
01:03:40,720 --> 01:03:41,599
mirror
1326
01:03:41,599 --> 01:03:42,640
shut up
1327
01:03:42,640 --> 01:03:44,480
kind of the wall is warped or the
1328
01:03:44,480 --> 01:03:46,960
foundation's failing or or it's a
1329
01:03:46,960 --> 01:03:49,760
[ __ ] ghost
1330
01:03:50,400 --> 01:03:51,920
[ __ ]
1331
01:03:51,920 --> 01:03:53,599
all right take the
1332
01:03:53,599 --> 01:03:55,119
take the [ __ ] mirror outside see if
1333
01:03:55,119 --> 01:03:58,810
you can salvage it
1334
01:03:58,810 --> 01:04:06,480
[Music]
1335
01:04:06,480 --> 01:04:09,359
well we've had another setback
1336
01:04:09,359 --> 01:04:11,119
uh one of the big selling points of our
1337
01:04:11,119 --> 01:04:13,440
house here had a little accident but i
1338
01:04:13,440 --> 01:04:15,440
think with a little bit there's buddha
1339
01:04:15,440 --> 01:04:17,440
buddha he went in the door oh he took
1340
01:04:17,440 --> 01:04:19,440
him i'm not sure what door the door the
1341
01:04:19,440 --> 01:04:21,520
stupid door that goes nowhere and the
1342
01:04:21,520 --> 01:04:24,880
hindu says he's in it who posed
1343
01:04:24,880 --> 01:04:26,960
all right hang on just
1344
01:04:26,960 --> 01:04:29,520
honey you stay here blondie what no [ __ ]
1345
01:04:29,520 --> 01:04:31,920
that you're with me you stay here with
1346
01:04:31,920 --> 01:04:34,160
her
1347
01:04:34,160 --> 01:04:37,160
go
1348
01:04:51,680 --> 01:04:53,680
why the hell did he go through that door
1349
01:04:53,680 --> 01:04:55,119
he doesn't know
1350
01:04:55,119 --> 01:04:56,559
what that turned around are you going in
1351
01:04:56,559 --> 01:04:57,920
to look dizzy or something i don't know
1352
01:04:57,920 --> 01:04:58,720
oh
1353
01:04:58,720 --> 01:05:01,839
now you speak english son of a [ __ ] god
1354
01:05:01,839 --> 01:05:03,680
damn it this better not be any more of
1355
01:05:03,680 --> 01:05:05,680
joe's [ __ ] guys he sounds like he's
1356
01:05:05,680 --> 01:05:08,000
being tortured all right get some tools
1357
01:05:08,000 --> 01:05:09,839
get some tools we'll take the door off
1358
01:05:09,839 --> 01:05:12,000
the hinges
1359
01:05:12,000 --> 01:05:13,920
stop [ __ ] around with that door
1360
01:05:13,920 --> 01:05:17,720
nobody touch it
1361
01:05:25,200 --> 01:05:26,799
all right we gotta get out of here we're
1362
01:05:26,799 --> 01:05:28,640
no good to boot either
1363
01:05:28,640 --> 01:05:30,319
what are we gonna do i don't [ __ ]
1364
01:05:30,319 --> 01:05:35,079
know hang on let me let me think
1365
01:05:45,119 --> 01:05:48,280
right now
1366
01:05:57,520 --> 01:05:59,440
how'd you get the door open i didn't
1367
01:05:59,440 --> 01:06:04,280
[ __ ] you gotta get him out of here
1368
01:06:07,039 --> 01:06:10,270
what the [ __ ]
1369
01:06:10,270 --> 01:06:14,539
[Applause]
1370
01:06:27,359 --> 01:06:30,680
call 911
1371
01:06:35,520 --> 01:06:38,680
the [ __ ]
1372
01:06:46,799 --> 01:06:48,400
go go
1373
01:06:48,400 --> 01:06:52,039
call me from the hospital
1374
01:06:58,580 --> 01:07:00,720
[Music]
1375
01:07:00,720 --> 01:07:04,720
it's a [ __ ] television show
1376
01:07:05,119 --> 01:07:08,240
never had anybody leave my job ever
1377
01:07:08,240 --> 01:07:10,079
in an ambulance twice on this [ __ ]
1378
01:07:10,079 --> 01:07:12,839
what happened what what
1379
01:07:12,839 --> 01:07:15,920
happened where the [ __ ] were you you
1380
01:07:15,920 --> 01:07:17,440
missed the war
1381
01:07:17,440 --> 01:07:20,240
dee dee dee call me calm it down i swear
1382
01:07:20,240 --> 01:07:21,920
to god this is none of your business
1383
01:07:21,920 --> 01:07:23,599
where the [ __ ] were you okay whoa you
1384
01:07:23,599 --> 01:07:25,440
covering your tracks what the [ __ ] is
1385
01:07:25,440 --> 01:07:28,480
going on you've been staging this crap
1386
01:07:28,480 --> 01:07:30,880
you conceded [ __ ] you've been [ __ ]
1387
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:33,119
with me [ __ ] it with my livelihood all
1388
01:07:33,119 --> 01:07:35,359
for your goddamn halloween episode well
1389
01:07:35,359 --> 01:07:37,039
you know what your damn near got
1390
01:07:37,039 --> 01:07:38,480
somebody killed
1391
01:07:38,480 --> 01:07:39,920
did you see him
1392
01:07:39,920 --> 01:07:41,760
did you see what you did
1393
01:07:41,760 --> 01:07:44,160
son of a [ __ ] was torn apart that's on
1394
01:07:44,160 --> 01:07:47,119
your head not satanists not some vandal
1395
01:07:47,119 --> 01:07:49,440
kids that's on your [ __ ] head i don't
1396
01:07:49,440 --> 01:07:51,039
know what the [ __ ] you're talking about
1397
01:07:51,039 --> 01:07:53,520
you psycho i just [ __ ] got here joe
1398
01:07:53,520 --> 01:07:55,200
did not do that you mind your own
1399
01:07:55,200 --> 01:07:57,200
goddamn business i swear to god do your
1400
01:07:57,200 --> 01:07:59,200
job do your [ __ ] job look i don't
1401
01:07:59,200 --> 01:08:01,119
know what the [ __ ] is going on but you
1402
01:08:01,119 --> 01:08:02,720
need to stop right now before you say
1403
01:08:02,720 --> 01:08:04,319
something that you regret i don't say
1404
01:08:04,319 --> 01:08:07,730
anything i regret you [ __ ] [ __ ]
1405
01:08:07,730 --> 01:08:11,039
[Music]
1406
01:08:15,450 --> 01:08:17,120
[Music]
1407
01:08:17,120 --> 01:08:18,880
you can see that little [ __ ] are you
1408
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:20,560
denying you put up aaron to run around
1409
01:08:20,560 --> 01:08:21,170
the house
1410
01:08:21,170 --> 01:08:23,279
[Music]
1411
01:08:23,279 --> 01:08:27,198
yeah all right i did that you did that
1412
01:08:27,198 --> 01:08:29,198
i did it for the show for the [ __ ]
1413
01:08:29,198 --> 01:08:31,040
show
1414
01:08:31,040 --> 01:08:34,080
what about the graffiti
1415
01:08:34,080 --> 01:08:36,560
yeah i did that too really
1416
01:08:36,560 --> 01:08:38,560
really something's going on with rebecca
1417
01:08:38,560 --> 01:08:40,158
you get this on tape there's something
1418
01:08:40,158 --> 01:08:41,109
wrong with that
1419
01:08:41,109 --> 01:08:44,000
[Music]
1420
01:08:44,000 --> 01:08:45,920
how'd you do the goddamn mirror
1421
01:08:45,920 --> 01:08:47,359
how'd you do that how'd you do that
1422
01:08:47,359 --> 01:08:50,760
[ __ ] moving club
1423
01:08:50,760 --> 01:08:58,238
[Music]
1424
01:08:58,238 --> 01:09:00,479
it's my job to make you look [ __ ]
1425
01:09:00,479 --> 01:09:02,319
interesting okay
1426
01:09:02,319 --> 01:09:04,158
that [ __ ] ain't [ __ ] all right then
1427
01:09:04,158 --> 01:09:05,359
you know what you don't have to [ __ ]
1428
01:09:05,359 --> 01:09:08,560
worry about it anymore cause i'm done
1429
01:09:08,560 --> 01:09:10,238
where the [ __ ] are you going i'm [ __ ]
1430
01:09:10,238 --> 01:09:11,759
out of here rebecca and i are leaving
1431
01:09:11,759 --> 01:09:13,679
the house we're leaving the show we're
1432
01:09:13,679 --> 01:09:14,960
leaving you you're gonna break a
1433
01:09:14,960 --> 01:09:17,040
contract you can't do that you know what
1434
01:09:17,040 --> 01:09:19,759
[ __ ] you and [ __ ] your contract
1435
01:09:19,759 --> 01:09:21,759
rebecca come on go back rebecca don't
1436
01:09:21,759 --> 01:09:22,799
worry
1437
01:09:22,799 --> 01:09:24,719
come on we're going we're gonna hear you
1438
01:09:24,719 --> 01:09:26,238
dee
1439
01:09:26,238 --> 01:09:28,000
[ __ ] daryl something get away from her
1440
01:09:28,000 --> 01:09:30,799
rebecca we gotta go
1441
01:09:30,799 --> 01:09:34,199
i got rebecca
1442
01:09:35,520 --> 01:09:37,600
get the [ __ ] off me
1443
01:09:37,600 --> 01:09:38,880
rebecca
1444
01:09:38,880 --> 01:09:39,759
honey
1445
01:09:39,759 --> 01:09:42,399
honey hey hey hey sweetie
1446
01:09:42,399 --> 01:09:43,759
you got to pull it together right now
1447
01:09:43,759 --> 01:09:46,479
okay you can't do this come on
1448
01:09:46,479 --> 01:09:49,718
come on
1449
01:09:54,480 --> 01:09:57,360
he never left ooh honey who never left
1450
01:09:57,360 --> 01:09:59,840
he couldn't
1451
01:09:59,840 --> 01:10:02,400
i have to set him free you have to sit
1452
01:10:02,400 --> 01:10:05,280
who are you looking at
1453
01:10:05,679 --> 01:10:09,600
oh my god oh come on my god oh my god
1454
01:10:09,600 --> 01:10:12,080
oh my god
1455
01:10:12,080 --> 01:10:14,000
get the first aid kit get the first aid
1456
01:10:14,000 --> 01:10:14,880
kit
1457
01:10:14,880 --> 01:10:17,760
somebody help me a second
1458
01:10:17,760 --> 01:10:18,880
daryl
1459
01:10:18,880 --> 01:10:21,120
god damn it rebecca
1460
01:10:21,120 --> 01:10:23,120
the hell's you let her go for
1461
01:10:23,120 --> 01:10:25,840
rebecca
1462
01:10:26,320 --> 01:10:28,560
we're back out rebecca
1463
01:10:28,560 --> 01:10:31,560
rebecca
1464
01:10:40,560 --> 01:10:43,560
man
1465
01:10:52,400 --> 01:10:55,640
my god
1466
01:11:45,040 --> 01:11:48,440
look at the door
1467
01:11:57,600 --> 01:12:00,600
wow
1468
01:12:21,280 --> 01:12:23,840
oh
1469
01:12:24,260 --> 01:12:46,880
[Music]
1470
01:12:47,199 --> 01:12:50,199
ah
1471
01:12:53,410 --> 01:13:00,619
[Music]
1472
01:13:03,090 --> 01:13:12,820
[Music]
1473
01:13:17,160 --> 01:13:41,369
[Music]
1474
01:13:46,860 --> 01:14:13,199
[Music]
1475
01:14:13,199 --> 01:14:14,940
i'm so sorry
1476
01:14:14,940 --> 01:14:24,359
[Music]
1477
01:14:29,679 --> 01:14:31,020
wait wait wait
1478
01:14:31,020 --> 01:14:34,159
[Music]
1479
01:14:34,159 --> 01:14:37,159
hey
1480
01:14:39,720 --> 01:14:52,800
[Music]
1481
01:14:52,800 --> 01:14:55,470
beer
1482
01:14:55,470 --> 01:14:58,080
[Music]
1483
01:14:58,080 --> 01:14:59,370
foreign
1484
01:14:59,370 --> 01:15:18,060
[Music]
1485
01:15:20,260 --> 01:15:23,329
[Music]
1486
01:15:23,760 --> 01:15:25,760
you may swear
1487
01:15:25,760 --> 01:15:29,159
be dead
1488
01:15:29,860 --> 01:15:33,840
[Music]
1489
01:15:33,840 --> 01:15:36,640
if outside
1490
01:15:36,640 --> 01:15:38,980
your
1491
01:15:38,980 --> 01:15:44,159
[Music]
1492
01:15:44,159 --> 01:15:45,600
i
1493
01:15:45,600 --> 01:15:46,480
will
1494
01:15:46,480 --> 01:15:47,920
call
1495
01:15:47,920 --> 01:15:51,320
your name
1496
01:15:54,159 --> 01:15:55,520
yeah i'm good
1497
01:15:55,520 --> 01:15:57,760
i tackle the disasters
1498
01:15:57,760 --> 01:16:01,440
i'm the guy who goes work others
1499
01:16:01,440 --> 01:16:03,120
here's the thread
1500
01:16:03,120 --> 01:16:05,760
that's why we rehearse i i felt like i
1501
01:16:05,760 --> 01:16:08,960
was touching someone's boob
1502
01:16:08,960 --> 01:16:11,600
touch it like it's your lover
1503
01:16:11,600 --> 01:16:14,480
your lover's boob
1504
01:16:14,719 --> 01:16:16,400
[ __ ] me
1505
01:16:16,400 --> 01:16:17,440
daryl
1506
01:16:17,440 --> 01:16:18,840
no you're not
1507
01:16:18,840 --> 01:16:22,080
daryl i'm daryl
1508
01:16:22,080 --> 01:16:24,080
i'm daryl
1509
01:16:24,080 --> 01:16:25,920
but how's it going
1510
01:16:25,920 --> 01:16:27,360
you're killing me no we're shooting that
1511
01:16:27,360 --> 01:16:28,239
we're shooting and we're shooting the
1512
01:16:28,239 --> 01:16:29,040
scene
1513
01:16:29,040 --> 01:16:30,080
yeah
1514
01:16:30,080 --> 01:16:31,760
no it's not now it's not going very well
1515
01:16:31,760 --> 01:16:33,679
at all
1516
01:16:33,679 --> 01:16:35,520
let's do it [ __ ]
1517
01:16:35,520 --> 01:16:39,480
show me um
1518
01:16:39,680 --> 01:16:43,029
[Applause]
1519
01:16:48,170 --> 01:16:51,220
[Music]
1520
01:16:51,920 --> 01:16:55,159
i'm funky
1521
01:16:55,160 --> 01:16:59,610
[Music]
1522
01:16:59,610 --> 01:17:05,620
[Laughter]
1523
01:17:05,620 --> 01:17:07,090
[Music]
1524
01:17:07,090 --> 01:17:08,210
[Applause]
1525
01:17:08,210 --> 01:17:11,199
[Music]
1526
01:17:11,199 --> 01:17:12,960
you're paying for it i'm not [ __ ]
1527
01:17:12,960 --> 01:17:14,880
paying for [ __ ] you're paying for it and
1528
01:17:14,880 --> 01:17:19,199
dinner and a happy ending [ __ ] prick
1529
01:17:19,199 --> 01:17:20,239
crazy
1530
01:17:20,239 --> 01:17:21,920
i know you've had a [ __ ] boundary
1531
01:17:21,920 --> 01:17:24,560
around that now for the past 10 years oh
1532
01:17:24,560 --> 01:17:26,400
darryl don't be mad that you can't lick
1533
01:17:26,400 --> 01:17:27,600
me
1534
01:17:27,600 --> 01:17:31,860
[Laughter]
1535
01:17:41,600 --> 01:17:42,840
you out of
1536
01:17:42,840 --> 01:17:47,040
here okay believe it or not we're okay
1537
01:17:47,040 --> 01:17:48,719
the fire
1538
01:17:48,719 --> 01:17:49,600
i'm
1539
01:17:49,600 --> 01:17:52,230
[ __ ] believable let's do that again
1540
01:17:52,230 --> 01:17:55,840
[Laughter]
1541
01:17:55,840 --> 01:17:56,840
it tastes like
1542
01:17:56,840 --> 01:18:00,880
chicken just a little twerk
1543
01:18:01,800 --> 01:18:03,030
[Music]
1544
01:18:03,030 --> 01:18:05,040
[Applause]
1545
01:18:05,040 --> 01:18:07,580
big twerk
1546
01:18:07,580 --> 01:18:12,000
[Laughter]
1547
01:18:12,000 --> 01:18:14,640
did you just drink that we put water in
1548
01:18:14,640 --> 01:18:16,560
it it sliced it i'm just kidding it did
1549
01:18:16,560 --> 01:18:18,239
not spin doesn't it taste like mussel
1550
01:18:18,239 --> 01:18:20,480
milk for the bottom
1551
01:18:20,480 --> 01:18:24,600
this is what eps really do
1552
01:18:26,400 --> 01:18:29,400
bye
92532
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