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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,135 --> 00:00:13,055 [soft eerie music] 2 00:00:13,055 --> 00:00:20,055 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:20,062 --> 00:00:22,442 - I had been, in total hon-- 4 00:00:22,439 --> 00:00:23,769 called to the office a couple times 5 00:00:23,774 --> 00:00:26,154 over "relationships with students." 6 00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:27,861 And-- - For what specifically? 7 00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,401 - No, just the classic. 8 00:00:29,404 --> 00:00:30,664 It was the, you know, 9 00:00:30,656 --> 00:00:32,816 "girl hanging out in your room," meal time, 10 00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:34,744 That kind of stuff. 11 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:36,873 You know, and I'm just like, "If you wanna investigate me, 12 00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:39,460 investigate me. Please." 13 00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:46,376 ♪ ♪ 14 00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:54,887 - Okay. 15 00:00:59,434 --> 00:01:03,694 What's public information is he's under investigation 16 00:01:03,689 --> 00:01:08,489 on the TEA website for misconduct with a student. 17 00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:10,395 We don't know what happened, 18 00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,574 and I don't know when we will know what happened. 19 00:01:12,573 --> 00:01:15,243 - He sat down with us. 20 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:17,792 He's been talking to us about this. 21 00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:21,116 You told him, and we've had conversations 22 00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:23,133 about grooming, inappropriate relationships, 23 00:01:23,125 --> 00:01:24,745 all of this stuff for... - Yeah. 24 00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:26,131 - A long time. 25 00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:27,918 For me, it's pretty simple. 26 00:01:27,921 --> 00:01:31,381 Are these-- is all this stuff true? 27 00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:33,303 Like the--are these real? 28 00:01:33,302 --> 00:01:36,682 Are these real text messages between you and this student? 29 00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,056 And what were you thinking? 30 00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:46,059 - I'm just tying myself into knots about this. 31 00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:48,284 - I can't help but think about 32 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:51,235 the girl on the other end of these allegations... 33 00:01:51,236 --> 00:01:53,696 ♪ ♪ 34 00:01:53,697 --> 00:01:56,737 Given the whole process that we've gone through. 35 00:01:56,742 --> 00:01:59,332 Everybody who we've met along this journey who's had-- 36 00:01:59,328 --> 00:02:00,828 who's been in her shoes. 37 00:02:00,829 --> 00:02:01,959 I'm thinking about you. 38 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,035 I'm thinking about Heaven. 39 00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,670 I'm thinking about Alisson. 40 00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:08,458 Yeah, personally, I would not feel good 41 00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:10,052 if we didn't do our due diligence around this 42 00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:13,677 just because of knowing how this cycle continues 43 00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:17,215 is by people not getting to the bottom of it 44 00:02:17,220 --> 00:02:18,720 and not exposing it. - Yep. 45 00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:20,642 - And I'm not gonna contribute to that. 46 00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:22,851 And that's, like, what I keep coming back to 47 00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:25,311 with this Tom thing. 48 00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:26,312 You know? 49 00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:28,153 - [sighs] 50 00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:32,568 ♪ ♪ 51 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:41,698 - I made the stupid-ass decision of actually caring. 52 00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:45,123 Kids knew that they were safe, 53 00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,713 that they could come and talk to me about anything. 54 00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:49,799 It was all done with doors open 55 00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:53,005 and they told me that I was being insubordinate 56 00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:56,796 by not following procedures, which I don't quite understand. 57 00:02:56,802 --> 00:03:01,182 But I just felt like I was used an example 58 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,351 all of a sudden. Done. 59 00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:06,900 Districts have become over reactionary 60 00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:10,395 and the fact that I'm being singled out 61 00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:11,939 is kind of painful. 62 00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:18,242 For me, grooming is a willful intention 63 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:23,200 to drag the student into a more intimate relationship. 64 00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,753 You know, "Can I see you?" 65 00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:27,617 It could be sending an image. 66 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:30,254 It could be, you know, an inappropriate text, 67 00:03:30,252 --> 00:03:33,462 if you try to instigate private meetings, 68 00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:36,553 "Send me a picture of you," 69 00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,390 "Oh, my God, that looks hot," 70 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:40,715 wanting to talk off-hours-- 71 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:42,600 that kind of stuff. 72 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:43,967 To me, that would be an instance 73 00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:46,274 of definite grooming. 74 00:03:46,268 --> 00:03:50,398 ♪ ♪ 75 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:53,857 - So we saw some posts on social media about 76 00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:57,199 purported to be texts between you and a student. 77 00:03:57,195 --> 00:03:58,315 - Mm-hmm. - I don't know 78 00:03:58,321 --> 00:04:00,491 if those were accurate, 79 00:04:00,490 --> 00:04:02,740 if they were those texts or if they were-- 80 00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:04,162 what context they were given in. 81 00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:06,251 Do you have-- have you seen those? 82 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:07,656 - Yes, I have. 83 00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:08,834 - Were those texts that were between 84 00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,542 you and a student? 85 00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:11,592 - Yes, they were. 86 00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:14,495 ♪ ♪ 87 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,554 I think that what the main problem they had with it 88 00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:19,589 is they don't understand the way 89 00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,263 that the Spanish language works. 90 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:24,141 There is two different ways to say, you know-- 91 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:27,769 you know, "Love you, have a great day, fantastic." 92 00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:30,978 You know, there's te quiero, which is basically used 93 00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:33,269 in front of family and friends. 94 00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:36,533 You know, I say that to all my former students. 95 00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,316 Te quiero. And there's the te amo, 96 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:43,370 which is--that's a bit serious, and you don't want to do that, 97 00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:46,156 um, in any way, shape, or form. 98 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:49,961 So for me, all those texts that I had--that I'd sent 99 00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:52,496 this particular student, 100 00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,341 were basically support. 101 00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:55,746 "Hey, nice hair. 102 00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:58,514 Love the change of hair. Fantastic." 103 00:04:58,507 --> 00:05:01,337 In retrospect, yeah, probably shouldn't have sent them. 104 00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:03,473 But at the same time, any kind of support 105 00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:06,060 I would've be able to give them, 106 00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:07,516 I don't regret that. 107 00:05:07,516 --> 00:05:09,726 ♪ ♪ 108 00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:12,146 - If my daughter was getting those text messages 109 00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,225 from a teacher, 110 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:16,981 I would be at the school that same day. 111 00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,113 Period. 112 00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:19,859 End of story. 113 00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,861 Yeah, no, I don't believe him. 114 00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,703 I don't believe him. 115 00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:25,488 I can't believe him. 116 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:29,752 The story with Tom has this greater kind of arc 117 00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:33,456 of not understanding where the line is 118 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:36,288 and kind of placing the blame on everybody else 119 00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:37,924 because he's not being able to teach 120 00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:40,221 in the way that he wants to teach. 121 00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:43,255 ♪ ♪ 122 00:05:58,733 --> 00:06:00,863 [light clattering] [beep] 123 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:04,865 [clattering] 124 00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:08,906 - We've been together for 4 1/2 years now. 125 00:06:08,910 --> 00:06:10,750 I already know, like, that is my life partner. 126 00:06:10,745 --> 00:06:13,325 You know, we are married in our heads, 127 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:16,421 even though it hasn't happened in life yet. 128 00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:21,758 Heaven is the sweetest person I know. 129 00:06:21,756 --> 00:06:23,336 You know, she's often described as, you know, 130 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,471 like a ray of sunshine and I feel like 131 00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:27,178 that is the true Heaven. 132 00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:30,098 At her core she is just so sweet and loving. 133 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:33,808 But then no one sees the hours she spends in bed 134 00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:36,060 just, like, crying because there is so much-- 135 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,322 or she feels like everything is on her 136 00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:39,895 and she is constantly double-checking 137 00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:42,360 and second-guessing every move that she makes. 138 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,410 She doesn't expect to be believed. 139 00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:48,445 She comes prepared with every single thing 140 00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:52,620 I need to explain to make sure that you are going to trust me 141 00:06:52,621 --> 00:06:54,291 because that is what everyone else showed her 142 00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:55,789 she needed to do. 143 00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:57,460 It feels like it would be chaos 144 00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,629 to be in Heaven's head. 145 00:06:59,628 --> 00:07:04,048 [soft sentimental music] 146 00:07:04,049 --> 00:07:05,469 - The teachers had-- 147 00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:07,757 [inhales, exhales] 148 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,931 ♪ ♪ 149 00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:13,179 The teachers and the administration 150 00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:16,143 at my high school really made me feel like it was my fault, 151 00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:18,104 and they played a role 152 00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:21,824 in, like, that psychological, like-- 153 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:24,146 where you can't trust yourself 154 00:07:24,152 --> 00:07:26,452 because you're like, "Did I do something wrong?" 155 00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,776 Like, it took me years to understand 156 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:33,372 that the stuff he had said to me to... 157 00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:35,500 make me trust him, 158 00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:37,747 the "advice" that he was giving me, 159 00:07:37,749 --> 00:07:41,129 was to have me under his wing so that I would trust him, 160 00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,127 so that... 161 00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:44,918 ♪ ♪ 162 00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:48,183 He could get to know what he needed to know about me 163 00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:50,966 to manipulate me, to groom me. 164 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:55,480 ♪ ♪ 165 00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:58,095 There were just-- there were just a few things 166 00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:00,523 that I feel like now looking back on it, 167 00:08:00,522 --> 00:08:02,442 it was right in my face. 168 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,690 With what I know now, I just think 169 00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:07,284 he had a motive 170 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:12,198 and he was willing to do what it took to get his way. 171 00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:34,972 [soft foreboding music] 172 00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:36,983 - The first comment that I can remember 173 00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:39,095 that was, like, off was-- 174 00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:40,562 I was leaving one day 175 00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:43,692 and he kind of, like, leaned back in his chair 176 00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,280 and was just kind of, like, looking at me 177 00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:47,145 and was like, "I really like you." 178 00:08:47,152 --> 00:08:48,952 And I was like, "Thanks." 179 00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:51,945 Like, "I like you too. Like, cool. 180 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,988 This class is awesome." 181 00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:56,792 And he said, "No, I'm serious. I mean, I like-like you." 182 00:08:56,786 --> 00:09:02,666 ♪ ♪ 183 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,207 And so I didn't really think anything of it. 184 00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,880 I just kept going on. 185 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,299 And then there was another time 186 00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:10,007 where he'd said, you know, 187 00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:12,218 "I don't know if I've told you this before, 188 00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,388 but I struggle with insomnia." 189 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:15,557 And he said, "And you know, 190 00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:16,805 "when the school year starts again, 191 00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:19,016 "that sometimes can ramp up, 192 00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,977 "and I have, like, a problem with my insomnia, 193 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,557 "but I haven't been feeling that way 194 00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:26,823 since we started working together." 195 00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:29,862 - Something about the admiration in his eyes 196 00:09:29,861 --> 00:09:32,571 as I was childlike seemed comforting. 197 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,322 Rarely was I rewarded with kindness 198 00:09:34,324 --> 00:09:36,794 in moments of childlike behavior. 199 00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,865 I remember being conditioned to grow up 200 00:09:38,870 --> 00:09:41,580 before I knew what growing up meant. 201 00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,041 It made us closer. 202 00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,592 He coached me through some of this pain, 203 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:48,336 opened portal to poetry 204 00:09:48,338 --> 00:09:52,758 that allowed me to make friends with pen and page. 205 00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:57,139 I felt he was mentoring me by sharing common experiences 206 00:09:57,138 --> 00:09:58,848 or giving me advice of, like, 207 00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:00,138 "This won't hurt you for so long. 208 00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:02,351 "You'll be able to move away and go to college 209 00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:04,902 "and, like, you'll start to shape your life and these-- 210 00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:06,896 "you know, the stress that you're feeling right now 211 00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:09,358 won't be forever," and so I felt like 212 00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,489 I was getting a benefit in that. 213 00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:16,446 ♪ ♪ 214 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:17,739 He said, "Bring me everything you've written 215 00:10:17,742 --> 00:10:19,292 in the last year." 216 00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:22,745 And a lot of it was, like, gushy and emotional 217 00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:26,917 and, like, very embarrassing if I had to read it now. 218 00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:29,708 He said, "You know, your work, it's really immature." 219 00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:33,422 And I was surprised and a little disappointed. 220 00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:37,854 I went from being good enough that you invited me in 221 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,766 to now I'm immature. 222 00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:43,265 So I kind of, like, put that on myself 223 00:10:43,268 --> 00:10:46,648 of, like, what can I do to be better? 224 00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:49,186 I had been writing a poem where I felt like 225 00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:52,070 a boy I had a crush on didn't like me back. 226 00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:55,108 He's like, "So you're feeling disconnected from this person 227 00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:57,743 "that you're trying to connect with, 228 00:10:57,740 --> 00:11:01,290 "and sex is like a really intimate thing, 229 00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,446 and, like, can we maybe write about that?" 230 00:11:03,454 --> 00:11:05,964 I did not write about those kinds of things. 231 00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:08,287 I didn't really talk about those kinds of things. 232 00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:10,633 ♪ ♪ 233 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:14,628 And so he gives me this example. 234 00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,892 And he says, you know, "I wrote this last night. 235 00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:18,675 I was thinking about you." 236 00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:23,058 And he'd written a line about lips to lips 237 00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:25,057 creating like a double entendre 238 00:11:25,059 --> 00:11:27,729 of lips on your face 239 00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:29,859 and lips on... 240 00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:35,026 ♪ ♪ 241 00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:37,198 One day he was like, "You can come sit over here 242 00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:39,947 by my desk," and he was like, "You can sit closer." 243 00:11:39,949 --> 00:11:42,289 I was standing and he stood up 244 00:11:42,285 --> 00:11:44,945 and he put his hands on my face. 245 00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:49,334 And, you know, I said no. 246 00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:53,764 Um, not very loudly, 247 00:11:53,755 --> 00:11:56,215 but I was uncomfortable. 248 00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,756 ♪ ♪ 249 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,720 And he kissed me. 250 00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:05,431 And that's kind of what started, like, 251 00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:09,403 a slew of other inappropriate 252 00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:15,145 and very manipulative and exploitive behavior. 253 00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:22,161 ♪ ♪ 254 00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:24,738 I did things 255 00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:28,214 that I did not feel comfortable doing. 256 00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:31,206 The reason why I didn't scream or run 257 00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:36,379 or tell someone immediately is because... 258 00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:41,801 when he would ask, you know, "Can you go down on me?"... 259 00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:44,183 ♪ ♪ 260 00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:47,180 It was after an argument 261 00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:51,193 where he had said that I was ungrateful, 262 00:12:51,187 --> 00:12:54,977 that I didn't value the time and effort 263 00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:58,443 and... 264 00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:02,374 energy that he put into helping me. 265 00:13:02,365 --> 00:13:05,365 [sniffs] You know, I was scared that if I said something, 266 00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:07,448 I was going to ruin someone's life 267 00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:09,543 who maybe cared about me, 268 00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:12,079 and at that time, I was certain that he cared. 269 00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:14,957 His cold hands. 270 00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:17,011 The sharpness in his voice. 271 00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:19,665 My isolation. 272 00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:23,224 And during that time, I just didn't know what to do. 273 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:29,559 Like, way too much for a 17-year-old to carry. 274 00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:35,819 The anxiety, like, really started to kick in. 275 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,985 I was having trouble keeping food down. 276 00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:42,025 I really wasn't eating very much, 277 00:13:42,030 --> 00:13:44,370 not sleeping very much. 278 00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:48,655 He had told me, you know, "Nobody can know," 279 00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:51,541 and so I was pushing my friends away. 280 00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:55,999 And so this world that I had worked so hard to create, 281 00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:59,092 where I had had friends 282 00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:02,258 and things I was interested in doing... 283 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:04,428 all of those things went away 284 00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:08,057 because of the pressure and the guilt 285 00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:14,726 and the restrictions that he made me feel like 286 00:14:14,729 --> 00:14:16,939 would benefit me if I did them. 287 00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:21,069 If--if you don't tell, then, like... 288 00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,069 things are gonna be okay. 289 00:14:24,572 --> 00:14:26,162 And so I just went along. 290 00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:29,237 I tried to follow the rules as best as I could. 291 00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:34,753 But once he was gone, after we'd been physical, 292 00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:37,339 he was everywhere, lingering inside of me 293 00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:40,915 and I wanted to itch him off my skin. 294 00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:43,882 [eerie music] 295 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,933 ♪ ♪ 296 00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,968 - Where can you go? 297 00:14:48,971 --> 00:14:50,721 Those are the people you're around 298 00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,603 eight hours a day. 299 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,890 Everybody condones this authority 300 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,734 that these men have over you, right? 301 00:14:56,729 --> 00:15:00,729 I'm being told by everybody that these men 302 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,493 who are my teachers 303 00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:04,445 are the ones who are in charge of me. 304 00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:07,615 That power dynamic, in a way, is almost ultimate 305 00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:10,195 because everyone around you is telling you 306 00:15:10,201 --> 00:15:12,161 to trust these people. 307 00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:16,421 I was sort of bred to be this person. 308 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,455 - So if you took sort of the culture of Texas 309 00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:22,459 and you sort of concentrated it down to something, 310 00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:24,423 it was Little Elm. Very small. 311 00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:27,303 I think there were 2,500 people when I graduated high school 312 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:31,601 in the town. It was run by white men. 313 00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:35,267 Having your education guided by white men 314 00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:41,148 and predominantly taught by white men, 315 00:15:41,149 --> 00:15:44,859 having women's sports teams run by white men, 316 00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:49,661 definitely gave the impression and the idea 317 00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:51,527 that white men were superior. 318 00:15:51,534 --> 00:15:55,964 And when you have a society culture 319 00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:59,375 where white men are sort of ruling and in charge, 320 00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:01,495 it creates an environment 321 00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:03,342 that's not safe for anyone else, 322 00:16:03,337 --> 00:16:05,837 certainly not safe for women and girls, 323 00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:07,760 certainly not safe for people of color, 324 00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:10,048 certainly not safe for people who are different. 325 00:16:28,571 --> 00:16:30,161 [soft melancholic music] 326 00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:35,156 - I had told my friend that things were going on 327 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:39,291 and she had said, "This makes me really uncomfortable. 328 00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:44,050 Do what you wanna do, but, like, I can't handle this." 329 00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:46,005 And my best friend at the time, 330 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:49,045 her mom decided to call the police. 331 00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:53,430 And so I was pulled out of my fifth period. 332 00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:56,469 And the police walk in and I'm sitting there thinking like, 333 00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:58,524 "Oh, my God, I know what that is." 334 00:16:58,517 --> 00:17:01,937 And so the police, you know, they bring me upstairs 335 00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:04,518 into their resource officer room 336 00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:08,243 and they start asking me questions 337 00:17:08,236 --> 00:17:11,356 and I denied it, um, 338 00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,454 until they said, "This is happening 339 00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:16,369 to other people, and we know it." 340 00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:19,459 And, like, a switch went off. 341 00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:21,915 There were so many other people 342 00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:25,336 that felt that Mr. Meyers had been inappropriate with them. 343 00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:27,796 You know, some of my close friends 344 00:17:27,797 --> 00:17:31,547 that had said he had abused them as well 345 00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:36,891 and I'm thinking, "How was he abusing the both of us 346 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:42,139 and we're sitting diagonal from one another in class?" 347 00:17:42,144 --> 00:17:45,024 And then I was faced with watching the news media 348 00:17:45,022 --> 00:17:47,322 broadcast the arrest and seeing his picture 349 00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:50,606 and my story in such a public way. 350 00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:53,071 - 40-year-old Jason Meyers has been arrested. 351 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:55,162 - Palmetto High School teacher is behind bars. 352 00:17:55,157 --> 00:17:57,407 Jason Meyers is charged with sexual battery. 353 00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:59,500 - Meyers accused of having sex with a student. 354 00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:02,245 - A teacher who is accused of sex crimes. 355 00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,168 - I was also very upset 356 00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:06,086 when I saw they said my initials. 357 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:07,545 - Okay, so he's, uh... 358 00:18:07,545 --> 00:18:09,205 [indistinct chatter] 359 00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:11,263 Alleged to have committed a sexual battery 360 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:12,627 on a minor by an adult. 361 00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:14,013 Let me take a look at this. 362 00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:16,140 The minor has initials H. R. 363 00:18:16,137 --> 00:18:18,507 - Following his arrest, 364 00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:23,024 reporters showed up at my house... 365 00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:28,569 followed my dad on his route to work. 366 00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:30,936 You know, and they come and they bang on the door, 367 00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:32,323 and you don't know what's going on. 368 00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:35,070 You open it and people are just screaming questions 369 00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:38,742 at you and I remember crying. 370 00:18:38,743 --> 00:18:40,333 By the time I was back at school, 371 00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:41,908 everyone knew that it was me. 372 00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:46,422 My world was falling apart, and... 373 00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:48,247 I have to go back to school 374 00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:50,462 because I still need to get into college 375 00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,263 and life needs to have some sense of normalcy. 376 00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:57,137 ♪ ♪ 377 00:18:57,136 --> 00:19:01,716 And I have my teacher, and I sit down 378 00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:03,604 and she starts talking about 379 00:19:03,601 --> 00:19:07,441 "The girls involved with this are lying." 380 00:19:07,438 --> 00:19:10,478 Jason Meyers is a great teacher. 381 00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:13,363 He's a great man. 382 00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:17,321 Very, very quickly it was this culture of, like, 383 00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:19,833 he's with us 384 00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:23,405 and you're not. 385 00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:26,292 [exhales] 386 00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,998 [dark unsettling music] 387 00:19:30,002 --> 00:19:33,342 - Nobody knows why there's such a huge protection 388 00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:35,219 with Jason Meyers. 389 00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,386 Once a teacher gets arrested, 390 00:19:37,385 --> 00:19:40,965 it has to go to the Department of Education in Tallahassee 391 00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:42,771 for a licensure investigation, 392 00:19:42,765 --> 00:19:45,555 and nothing was done in Tallahassee 393 00:19:45,559 --> 00:19:46,559 with Jason Meyers. 394 00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:47,850 I don't know why. 395 00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:51,323 In 2016, '17, '18, '19, and '20, 396 00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:53,355 his license wasn't even touched. 397 00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,989 ♪ ♪ 398 00:19:55,986 --> 00:19:58,526 Parents have come out to the school board meetings 399 00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,121 to talk about the school district's penchant 400 00:20:01,117 --> 00:20:03,237 for not caring. 401 00:20:03,244 --> 00:20:07,084 - There have been teachers who have committed sexual crimes 402 00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:08,871 on our children, and I want to know why 403 00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:11,094 these teachers are being protected 404 00:20:11,085 --> 00:20:13,415 and not being held accountable. 405 00:20:13,421 --> 00:20:15,801 - This is a real issue. 406 00:20:15,798 --> 00:20:18,428 You have kids who are out of the system, 407 00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:19,926 and five years later, they're waiting 408 00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:22,557 to see their abuser in court. 409 00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,845 You guys allow this. 410 00:20:24,849 --> 00:20:26,809 You should be ashamed of yourself. 411 00:20:26,809 --> 00:20:33,689 ♪ ♪ 412 00:20:35,609 --> 00:20:38,699 - It's unacceptable, and it's gotta change. 413 00:20:38,696 --> 00:20:41,236 So we filed a lawsuit under Title IX 414 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,330 to hold the school board accountable 415 00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:47,286 for failing to do its job. 416 00:20:47,288 --> 00:20:48,958 It wasn't to just chase the money, 417 00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:50,366 just get the quick settlement, 418 00:20:50,374 --> 00:20:52,384 and let them sweep it under the rug. 419 00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:57,296 It was to get the point across that the system is broken. 420 00:20:57,298 --> 00:20:59,088 I don't think the school board ever thought 421 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,841 we would see it through. 422 00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:03,894 I think they thought that they could throw money 423 00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:05,428 at the problem and it would go away. 424 00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,870 [somber music] 425 00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:31,459 - The civil case happened in fall of 2021. 426 00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:34,377 - The news media followed the case considerably. 427 00:21:35,878 --> 00:21:37,668 - It's a teacher sex case. 428 00:21:37,671 --> 00:21:40,971 - What did Miami-Dade school district leaders know? 429 00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,926 - The school got a warning about Meyers 430 00:21:42,927 --> 00:21:44,887 years before his arrest. 431 00:21:44,887 --> 00:21:46,257 - Meyers' former student 432 00:21:46,263 --> 00:21:47,723 has already filed a lawsuit. 433 00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:49,233 - The student has filed suit. 434 00:21:49,225 --> 00:21:51,845 - She is Jane Doe in a lawsuit 435 00:21:51,852 --> 00:21:54,192 filed against the Miami-Dade school board. 436 00:21:54,188 --> 00:21:56,068 - Suing the school board was really difficult 437 00:21:56,065 --> 00:21:59,235 because it was me versus them. 438 00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:03,065 It wasn't the state versus Meyers. 439 00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:06,122 And so they were going to attack me, 440 00:22:06,116 --> 00:22:07,946 and they did. 441 00:22:07,952 --> 00:22:10,002 They victim blame. 442 00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:12,285 They say, "Well, here are all of the other things 443 00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:13,959 "that were wrong. 444 00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:15,668 Wasn't us." 445 00:22:15,668 --> 00:22:18,958 - They would go to any length to avoid accountability, 446 00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:21,423 and so they threw money at the problem 447 00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:24,433 by hiring so-called experts 448 00:22:24,426 --> 00:22:28,056 to support their theory of defense. 449 00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:31,925 They also had a psychologist, Dr. Shelia Rapa, 450 00:22:31,934 --> 00:22:34,904 who evaluated Heaven. 451 00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:39,475 Dr. Rapa was adamant that she was not traumatized 452 00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:41,783 in any way and did not suffer 453 00:22:41,777 --> 00:22:44,447 from any sort of mental health disorder. 454 00:22:44,446 --> 00:22:47,366 The other attack they're making 455 00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:50,116 is social media posts. 456 00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:53,119 They thought that would support their theory 457 00:22:53,122 --> 00:22:55,712 that she's doing fine, that she's not damaged, 458 00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:58,498 just like their experts said. 459 00:22:58,502 --> 00:23:01,302 - It was just a really ridiculous, comical thing, 460 00:23:01,297 --> 00:23:03,837 honestly, to us, because they just tried so hard 461 00:23:03,841 --> 00:23:08,011 to paint that narrative using social media. 462 00:23:08,012 --> 00:23:10,562 - We are in the misogynist culture 463 00:23:10,556 --> 00:23:13,726 where women, if they're not believed, 464 00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:17,096 then, you know, why would you believe a teenager, especially? 465 00:23:17,104 --> 00:23:19,024 You know, there's something ageist about this too 466 00:23:19,023 --> 00:23:20,903 that they couldn't know what's happening 467 00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,320 or what did they do to contribute 468 00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:23,358 to that situation? 469 00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:27,070 ♪ ♪ 470 00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:30,332 - People were victim blaming me. 471 00:23:30,326 --> 00:23:31,736 There's been a lot of that. 472 00:23:31,744 --> 00:23:34,584 But I think I was the number one perpetrator 473 00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:36,920 of the victim blaming. 474 00:23:36,916 --> 00:23:39,706 I was the person who did wrong, 475 00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:41,920 and then I was the person that could take responsibility 476 00:23:41,921 --> 00:23:43,461 for it, and so in a way, 477 00:23:43,464 --> 00:23:46,094 I was taking responsibility for everybody 478 00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:48,181 so that I could make it okay. 479 00:23:48,177 --> 00:23:51,137 - It's just so sad, honestly, 480 00:23:51,138 --> 00:23:55,728 and it just ruins so many girls' confidence 481 00:23:55,726 --> 00:24:00,056 and it's a lot of unlearning for a lot of people. 482 00:24:00,064 --> 00:24:02,654 You start that guilt cycle so early. 483 00:24:02,650 --> 00:24:04,610 It's really hard as an adult to come out of that. 484 00:24:04,610 --> 00:24:06,320 No matter how much therapy you get, 485 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,860 sometimes that guilt and shame just lives inside you. 486 00:24:08,864 --> 00:24:15,754 ♪ ♪ 487 00:24:23,462 --> 00:24:26,172 - It's hard for me to talk about... 488 00:24:26,173 --> 00:24:30,143 ♪ ♪ 489 00:24:30,135 --> 00:24:34,425 The sex...that happened. 490 00:24:34,431 --> 00:24:39,521 ♪ ♪ 491 00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:44,780 I feel a lot of, like, shame and guilt around that. 492 00:24:44,775 --> 00:24:48,485 And the defense team has kind of, like, 493 00:24:48,487 --> 00:24:51,697 really pushed to reinforce this, like, 494 00:24:51,699 --> 00:24:53,529 "Well, you could've screamed. 495 00:24:53,534 --> 00:24:55,454 "You could've ran away. 496 00:24:55,452 --> 00:24:58,292 You could have told someone immediately." 497 00:24:58,288 --> 00:25:02,078 - He gradually progressed the sexual activity. 498 00:25:02,084 --> 00:25:05,254 There were instances of fellatio, 499 00:25:05,254 --> 00:25:08,764 cunnilingus, and sexual intercourse 500 00:25:08,757 --> 00:25:13,297 inside the classroom, behind the closed door, 501 00:25:13,303 --> 00:25:15,433 right under the school board's noses. 502 00:25:15,431 --> 00:25:18,231 - I remember kicking my legs, 503 00:25:18,225 --> 00:25:22,645 right, left, right, my feet unable to reach the ground. 504 00:25:22,646 --> 00:25:24,356 I turned to him, embarrassed, 505 00:25:24,356 --> 00:25:27,066 like a child who suddenly became self-aware 506 00:25:27,067 --> 00:25:30,447 of the space they took, noise they created. 507 00:25:30,446 --> 00:25:33,616 He met my doe eyes with eagerness-- 508 00:25:33,615 --> 00:25:37,995 calculated, studious, ready to pounce. 509 00:25:37,995 --> 00:25:40,285 I was a kid. 510 00:25:40,289 --> 00:25:42,169 [sniffles] 511 00:25:42,166 --> 00:25:45,126 [moody music] 512 00:25:45,127 --> 00:25:48,297 ♪ ♪ 513 00:25:48,297 --> 00:25:51,127 - She had other dreams. She had other passions. 514 00:25:51,133 --> 00:25:53,183 And they took that from her 515 00:25:53,177 --> 00:25:55,097 because they didn't do their jobs. 516 00:25:57,556 --> 00:25:59,926 - They really came after my character 517 00:25:59,933 --> 00:26:03,353 and my family in that, 518 00:26:03,353 --> 00:26:07,443 and so it's turned into something more 519 00:26:07,441 --> 00:26:09,151 than just what happened to me. 520 00:26:09,151 --> 00:26:11,281 ♪ ♪ 521 00:26:11,278 --> 00:26:13,568 And it has strained relationships 522 00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:17,202 with people in my immediate family. 523 00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:20,451 And now I'm living with the aftermath of that... 524 00:26:20,454 --> 00:26:24,544 ♪ ♪ 525 00:26:24,541 --> 00:26:27,711 And I don't know where some of the people in my family fall 526 00:26:27,711 --> 00:26:30,551 in my life since that. 527 00:26:32,466 --> 00:26:35,546 - She kind of sacrificed her family by doing this 528 00:26:35,552 --> 00:26:38,012 not knowingly that she was sacrificing her family, 529 00:26:38,013 --> 00:26:39,773 but her family didn't want her 530 00:26:39,765 --> 00:26:42,265 to go through with the civil lawsuit. 531 00:26:42,267 --> 00:26:45,727 And I think in a lot of ways, Heaven is alone right now. 532 00:26:45,729 --> 00:26:48,109 - This stuff is so heavy. 533 00:26:48,107 --> 00:26:50,437 It's, like, hard for me to, like, make friends 534 00:26:50,442 --> 00:26:53,452 or be myself around people 535 00:26:53,445 --> 00:26:55,815 because this is my life right now. 536 00:26:55,823 --> 00:26:57,033 If this wouldn't have happened, 537 00:26:57,032 --> 00:26:59,542 my life would have been very different. 538 00:26:59,535 --> 00:27:02,285 I don't know that I would necessarily wish 539 00:27:02,287 --> 00:27:05,867 for it to be different because I do feel like 540 00:27:05,874 --> 00:27:08,594 a strong sense of purpose with what I'm doing 541 00:27:08,585 --> 00:27:11,415 because I think it will make a difference, 542 00:27:11,421 --> 00:27:14,551 so I'm happy to do it. 543 00:27:14,550 --> 00:27:17,050 ♪ ♪ 544 00:27:33,193 --> 00:27:35,953 - Once trial is over, we sit down at a restaurant 545 00:27:35,946 --> 00:27:38,116 and we're waiting for the verdict. 546 00:27:38,115 --> 00:27:40,025 And the second we sit down, Mark is calling me 547 00:27:40,033 --> 00:27:41,333 and he says, "We have a verdict." 548 00:27:41,326 --> 00:27:42,906 We ran into the courtroom 549 00:27:42,911 --> 00:27:44,291 and I'm sitting there and it's, like, 550 00:27:44,288 --> 00:27:49,168 very, very, very quiet, and the jury comes out. 551 00:27:49,167 --> 00:27:51,297 The jury says yes, 552 00:27:51,295 --> 00:27:53,545 we found Miami-Dade County Public Schools 553 00:27:53,547 --> 00:27:55,257 to be deliberately indifferent. 554 00:27:55,257 --> 00:27:57,507 It's, like, super reassuring 555 00:27:57,509 --> 00:27:59,599 'cause you're hearing one by one the people 556 00:27:59,595 --> 00:28:02,215 that have watched it from that outside perspective. 557 00:28:02,222 --> 00:28:05,232 They read the verdict, and it was a $6-million verdict. 558 00:28:05,225 --> 00:28:07,635 [upbeat music] 559 00:28:07,644 --> 00:28:09,774 - And honestly, at that point, 560 00:28:09,771 --> 00:28:12,521 I could feel Heaven sitting next to me 561 00:28:12,524 --> 00:28:15,244 have this cathartic moment. 562 00:28:15,235 --> 00:28:18,905 I, myself, was just overwhelmed 563 00:28:18,906 --> 00:28:23,236 with pride and hope. 564 00:28:23,243 --> 00:28:25,913 ♪ ♪ 565 00:28:25,913 --> 00:28:28,623 - And when we walked outside, it was-- 566 00:28:28,624 --> 00:28:31,044 it was like the skies had just opened up 567 00:28:31,043 --> 00:28:33,253 and it just started to pour. 568 00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:36,260 And I started crying, 569 00:28:36,256 --> 00:28:39,796 and I felt like it was my grandmother. 570 00:28:39,801 --> 00:28:41,681 The streets were flooded. 571 00:28:41,678 --> 00:28:45,178 It was raining so hard and it was so windy. 572 00:28:45,182 --> 00:28:46,932 And I just... 573 00:28:46,934 --> 00:28:49,854 [soft sentimental music] 574 00:28:49,853 --> 00:28:51,863 ♪ ♪ 575 00:28:51,855 --> 00:28:55,105 In a weird way, I felt like it was her saying, like, 576 00:28:55,108 --> 00:28:58,528 "Good job. You saw it through." 577 00:28:58,528 --> 00:29:02,818 - We're inspired that we won in the civil case, 578 00:29:02,824 --> 00:29:07,044 but we are discouraged that it's been almost six years 579 00:29:07,037 --> 00:29:12,037 and yet the criminal trial still has not occurred. 580 00:29:12,042 --> 00:29:16,632 Mr. Meyers was arrested in February 2016. 581 00:29:16,630 --> 00:29:19,930 Criminal charges were filed thereafter. 582 00:29:19,925 --> 00:29:23,465 He's being criminally prosecuted as he should. 583 00:29:23,470 --> 00:29:26,140 And here we are in 2022, 584 00:29:26,139 --> 00:29:30,189 and he has yet to face justice. 585 00:29:30,185 --> 00:29:32,555 They're hoping that they will exhaust Heaven, 586 00:29:32,562 --> 00:29:35,192 that she will lose the will to fight, 587 00:29:35,190 --> 00:29:37,990 that she will lose the courage to come back to court 588 00:29:37,985 --> 00:29:43,155 and tell her story again to try to get a criminal prosecution, 589 00:29:43,156 --> 00:29:47,406 but that's not-- that's not the girl I know. 590 00:29:59,548 --> 00:30:00,668 - Do you think you'll want a whole one of these rolls 591 00:30:00,674 --> 00:30:01,934 or just, like, half? 592 00:30:01,925 --> 00:30:04,085 - Um, just a half, please. - Okay. 593 00:30:04,094 --> 00:30:06,144 - Thank you. 594 00:30:06,138 --> 00:30:08,928 I wish you could come with me to Miami. 595 00:30:08,932 --> 00:30:10,602 - I know, baby. When is that? 596 00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:12,140 A couple weeks? 597 00:30:12,144 --> 00:30:13,694 - Yeah, I am-- 598 00:30:13,687 --> 00:30:18,857 I have a hearing in two weeks 599 00:30:18,859 --> 00:30:21,489 to see if it's actually gonna go to trial. 600 00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:22,986 - Okay. Yeah, I was gonna ask you 601 00:30:22,988 --> 00:30:26,738 how confident you are that it actually does happen 602 00:30:26,742 --> 00:30:29,832 as it's planned. 603 00:30:29,828 --> 00:30:32,788 - [sighs] Yeah, that's, um, that's the question, right? 604 00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:34,539 [soft music] 605 00:30:34,541 --> 00:30:35,751 - I'm definitely afraid 606 00:30:35,751 --> 00:30:38,381 that they decide he's innocent, 607 00:30:38,378 --> 00:30:41,258 that it just becomes the antithesis 608 00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:44,836 to what happened with the other trial 609 00:30:44,843 --> 00:30:46,223 because I don't know what kind of effect 610 00:30:46,219 --> 00:30:48,719 that would have on Heaven. 611 00:30:48,722 --> 00:30:51,022 You could argue this is a more significant case 612 00:30:51,016 --> 00:30:52,726 than the other one 'cause this is the actual person 613 00:30:52,726 --> 00:30:55,306 who did this to you, this was the personal connection, 614 00:30:55,312 --> 00:30:56,562 the person that built the trust 615 00:30:56,563 --> 00:30:58,153 and then ripped that away 616 00:30:58,148 --> 00:31:00,728 and was doing this to so many other people. 617 00:31:00,734 --> 00:31:05,074 I'm really afraid of that somehow going wrong, 618 00:31:05,072 --> 00:31:07,782 of somehow they find him innocent. 619 00:31:07,783 --> 00:31:09,913 Our whole relationship I have wanted 620 00:31:09,910 --> 00:31:12,120 these court cases to happen. 621 00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:14,870 They have been the biggest, darkest cloud 622 00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,963 hanging over Heaven 623 00:31:16,958 --> 00:31:19,338 for the entire time I've known her, 624 00:31:19,336 --> 00:31:22,256 and it has felt like that is holding her back 625 00:31:22,255 --> 00:31:27,135 from being able to see a future, 626 00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:30,215 to be able to look forward to anything ahead of us. 627 00:31:30,222 --> 00:31:33,732 Like, we talk about a life together, but you can tell 628 00:31:33,725 --> 00:31:37,015 that it doesn't feel real to her. 629 00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:40,110 - Your partner's almost as important as your friends 630 00:31:40,107 --> 00:31:43,527 and--or your therapist or your parents or whatever 631 00:31:43,527 --> 00:31:46,277 and that they're kind of going through this with you. 632 00:31:46,279 --> 00:31:48,619 - When Cheryl told me she was thinking about 633 00:31:48,615 --> 00:31:52,655 doing something, I thought maybe it would be a play. 634 00:31:52,661 --> 00:31:56,621 My first reaction was I wanted to protect her from it. 635 00:31:56,623 --> 00:32:00,173 It seems scary to me to put it all out there. 636 00:32:00,168 --> 00:32:02,878 But then once she started sort of digging into it 637 00:32:02,879 --> 00:32:07,719 and I could see it was a release for her, 638 00:32:07,717 --> 00:32:09,797 it never leaves you. 639 00:32:09,803 --> 00:32:14,183 That kind of violation of who you are, 640 00:32:14,182 --> 00:32:16,182 she'll never be able to forget it. 641 00:32:16,184 --> 00:32:18,444 It'll never leave her, but I'm hoping 642 00:32:18,436 --> 00:32:20,266 she can find some peace. 643 00:32:27,237 --> 00:32:29,487 - The reason why I like to go through these 644 00:32:29,489 --> 00:32:33,289 is because it gives me a good frame of reference 645 00:32:33,285 --> 00:32:35,445 for what's gonna be asked of me again 646 00:32:35,453 --> 00:32:37,503 when I go to trial. 647 00:32:37,497 --> 00:32:43,337 So something that I think the defense will try to do 648 00:32:43,336 --> 00:32:46,716 during the case is try to ask me really specific questions 649 00:32:46,715 --> 00:32:49,005 to have the jury hear me say, "I don't know" 650 00:32:49,009 --> 00:32:50,469 as many times as possible 651 00:32:50,468 --> 00:32:53,428 because if I'm, like, the lead witness on a case 652 00:32:53,430 --> 00:32:54,930 and I don't know, 653 00:32:54,931 --> 00:32:56,771 "She doesn't remember anything," like, 654 00:32:56,766 --> 00:33:00,096 that's like their best shot at saying he's not guilty. 655 00:33:00,103 --> 00:33:03,523 Beyond a reasonable doubt is a hard thing to prove. 656 00:33:03,523 --> 00:33:05,613 I'm the only one that the judge has approved 657 00:33:05,609 --> 00:33:07,489 to testify. 658 00:33:07,485 --> 00:33:11,355 Like, it's on me to carry that through. 659 00:33:11,364 --> 00:33:13,744 And it's a lot. 660 00:33:13,742 --> 00:33:16,662 [melancholic piano music] 661 00:33:16,661 --> 00:33:22,081 ♪ ♪ 662 00:33:22,083 --> 00:33:23,133 - Good morning, Judge. Jessie Freeman 663 00:33:23,126 --> 00:33:24,536 on behalf of the state. 664 00:33:24,544 --> 00:33:25,884 - We have sounding on Thursday. 665 00:33:25,879 --> 00:33:26,839 You wanna go ahead and let me know 666 00:33:26,838 --> 00:33:28,418 what the status is now? 667 00:33:28,423 --> 00:33:30,303 - Yes, Your Honor. State's ready. 668 00:33:30,300 --> 00:33:33,890 And I do have Heaven, the victim on the case. 669 00:33:33,887 --> 00:33:35,927 She is present on the Zoom as well as my trial partner. 670 00:33:35,931 --> 00:33:37,471 That date does work. 671 00:33:37,474 --> 00:33:39,774 We were looking forward to going to trial now. 672 00:33:39,768 --> 00:33:41,058 - Defense is ready as well. 673 00:33:41,061 --> 00:33:42,901 That said, there are issues 674 00:33:42,896 --> 00:33:46,316 with the practicality of it going on March 14th. 675 00:33:46,316 --> 00:33:53,236 ♪ ♪ 676 00:33:55,909 --> 00:33:58,039 - Okay, good morning. 677 00:33:58,036 --> 00:34:00,286 - Good morning. - Morning. 678 00:34:00,288 --> 00:34:03,248 - Judge, state's ready to begin trial on 4/25. 679 00:34:03,250 --> 00:34:05,210 The lead detective, Detective Web, 680 00:34:05,210 --> 00:34:10,630 is in a--about a month-long training in Alabama. 681 00:34:10,632 --> 00:34:13,012 What I discussed with Mr. Horenstein 682 00:34:13,009 --> 00:34:16,179 was possibly picking a jury the week of 4/25 683 00:34:16,179 --> 00:34:19,099 and then starting testimony on the week of 5/2 684 00:34:19,099 --> 00:34:21,729 or in the alternative, having Detective Web testify 685 00:34:21,726 --> 00:34:24,846 via Zoom at the trial during the week of 4/25. 686 00:34:24,854 --> 00:34:27,364 - Defense, what's your preference? 687 00:34:27,357 --> 00:34:28,857 - Your Honor, I'll object to both. 688 00:34:28,858 --> 00:34:30,608 - Okay. 689 00:34:30,610 --> 00:34:32,450 - Having the detective-- the lead detective on the case 690 00:34:32,445 --> 00:34:34,445 via Zoom is not going to work. 691 00:34:34,447 --> 00:34:35,447 - I'm gonna be honest with you. 692 00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:38,658 We start Monday. 693 00:34:38,660 --> 00:34:41,080 I don't know that we'd be able to pick a jury in a day. 694 00:34:41,079 --> 00:34:43,079 - Okay. - Tuesday I have to finish 695 00:34:43,081 --> 00:34:46,131 no later than 4:00. - Okay. 696 00:34:46,126 --> 00:34:48,296 - We're all gonna make our best efforts, 697 00:34:48,295 --> 00:34:50,375 but I can't promise you when it's gonna be done. 698 00:34:50,380 --> 00:34:53,470 - The State chose to wait six years 699 00:34:53,466 --> 00:34:54,926 to decide that they wanted the trial 700 00:34:54,926 --> 00:34:56,386 and waited until-- - Right. 701 00:34:56,386 --> 00:34:57,886 I understand what you're saying. 702 00:34:57,887 --> 00:34:59,347 You know, it's last-minute. 703 00:34:59,347 --> 00:35:02,307 I 100% agree, but they're still timely, 704 00:35:02,309 --> 00:35:04,559 so I don't think that I should impose the most 705 00:35:04,561 --> 00:35:07,231 onerous sanction and have her stricken. 706 00:35:07,230 --> 00:35:12,650 ♪ ♪ 707 00:35:14,321 --> 00:35:17,281 [soft tense music] 708 00:35:17,282 --> 00:35:18,872 ♪ ♪ 709 00:35:18,867 --> 00:35:20,697 If we're not gonna be in trial, 710 00:35:20,702 --> 00:35:24,002 I already have another trial set second, waiting to go. 711 00:35:23,997 --> 00:35:25,537 [laughs] - Yeah. 712 00:35:25,540 --> 00:35:28,750 - Thank you, Mr. Meyers and... 713 00:35:28,752 --> 00:35:32,962 the rest of the people that are on the Zoom. 714 00:35:32,964 --> 00:35:39,974 ♪ ♪ 715 00:35:39,971 --> 00:35:42,391 - It's just hard. It's just really hard 716 00:35:42,390 --> 00:35:44,350 on my emotions and... 717 00:35:44,351 --> 00:35:47,351 [cries] 718 00:35:47,354 --> 00:35:54,364 ♪ ♪ 719 00:35:56,863 --> 00:35:59,123 That's, like, the reality of being victim. 720 00:35:59,115 --> 00:36:01,825 It's... 721 00:36:01,826 --> 00:36:05,366 extensive, unreasonable delays, 722 00:36:05,372 --> 00:36:08,792 lots of back and forth. 723 00:36:08,792 --> 00:36:10,712 Does waiting six years for trial, 724 00:36:10,710 --> 00:36:12,630 is that "speedy"? 725 00:36:12,629 --> 00:36:19,549 ♪ ♪ 726 00:36:36,444 --> 00:36:40,034 - I think too often we... 727 00:36:40,031 --> 00:36:44,041 we put pressure on the victims to explain to us 728 00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,495 their trauma, their experience 729 00:36:46,496 --> 00:36:52,416 to teach us and educate us about what they've gone through 730 00:36:52,419 --> 00:36:54,999 so that we have a better understanding of it. 731 00:36:55,004 --> 00:36:59,094 And that's putting too much of the onus on the victims 732 00:36:59,092 --> 00:37:02,602 to take responsibility for what was, in fact, 733 00:37:02,595 --> 00:37:06,425 done to them by somebody else. 734 00:37:08,852 --> 00:37:11,522 We don't spend enough time pointing the finger 735 00:37:11,521 --> 00:37:13,941 at the perpetrator of the crime. 736 00:37:13,940 --> 00:37:15,190 We need to talk about 737 00:37:15,191 --> 00:37:17,901 how the perpetrators need to change, 738 00:37:17,902 --> 00:37:22,452 not how we need to avoid being victimized. 739 00:37:26,286 --> 00:37:29,616 [moody music] 740 00:37:29,622 --> 00:37:32,582 ♪ ♪ 741 00:37:32,584 --> 00:37:35,174 You know, people keep asking me 742 00:37:35,170 --> 00:37:40,510 if I feel like I've found resolution 743 00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:43,848 or if I feel healed in any way. 744 00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:48,639 And I look at the different ways 745 00:37:48,641 --> 00:37:52,851 that Heaven and Alisson and I 746 00:37:52,854 --> 00:37:56,234 have all processed through our trauma. 747 00:37:56,232 --> 00:37:58,402 And for Alisson, 748 00:37:58,401 --> 00:38:04,031 she sat in a room and spent time with her journals 749 00:38:04,032 --> 00:38:06,452 and then she wrote a memoir. 750 00:38:06,451 --> 00:38:13,001 And for Heaven, she decided that the legal system 751 00:38:12,999 --> 00:38:15,539 was the way that she was going to process through her trauma. 752 00:38:15,543 --> 00:38:18,423 ♪ ♪ 753 00:38:18,421 --> 00:38:21,261 For me, I decided to make a documentary 754 00:38:21,257 --> 00:38:23,797 because that was the way that I processed 755 00:38:23,802 --> 00:38:26,012 through my pain, and I'm a filmmaker, 756 00:38:26,012 --> 00:38:28,852 and so that's how I wanted to process my trauma. 757 00:38:28,848 --> 00:38:33,518 ♪ ♪ 758 00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:39,070 I think in looking at our three very different experiences, 759 00:38:39,067 --> 00:38:41,857 what I've realized is, 760 00:38:41,861 --> 00:38:46,121 at the end of that road... 761 00:38:46,115 --> 00:38:48,695 in a way, there is no resolution 762 00:38:48,701 --> 00:38:54,751 because there is no way to tie this experience up in a bow 763 00:38:54,749 --> 00:38:58,669 and, you know, put it away on a shelf. 764 00:38:58,670 --> 00:38:59,960 [Daniel Farrant's "Who's Gonna Fix It"] 765 00:38:59,963 --> 00:39:01,383 - ♪ Don't you know that you gotta ♪ 766 00:39:01,381 --> 00:39:03,971 ♪ Take some of the blame ♪ 767 00:39:05,927 --> 00:39:09,557 ♪ You said those unkind words 'cause you think it's a game ♪ 768 00:39:09,556 --> 00:39:11,056 ♪ Well, it's not ♪ 769 00:39:11,057 --> 00:39:15,647 ♪ And it's got real serious ♪ 770 00:39:15,645 --> 00:39:16,935 ♪ Who's gonna fix it? ♪ 771 00:39:16,938 --> 00:39:18,108 ♪ Time to give it up ♪ 772 00:39:18,106 --> 00:39:19,646 ♪ Look around, get found ♪ 773 00:39:19,649 --> 00:39:21,899 ♪ But it don't make a new sound ♪ 774 00:39:21,901 --> 00:39:24,611 ♪ No joke 'cause it's broke ♪ 775 00:39:24,612 --> 00:39:27,452 ♪ Who's gonna fix it? ♪ 776 00:39:27,448 --> 00:39:29,778 ♪ Who's gonna fix it? ♪ 777 00:39:29,784 --> 00:39:36,714 ♪ ♪ 778 00:39:52,932 --> 00:39:56,232 - This is what we've been living with forever, 779 00:39:56,227 --> 00:39:59,857 so it would have to take something enormous 780 00:39:59,856 --> 00:40:01,646 to change here. 781 00:40:01,649 --> 00:40:06,319 When you think about teaching children about consent, 782 00:40:06,321 --> 00:40:08,991 that's actually a huge thing, 783 00:40:08,990 --> 00:40:11,120 but it's something small that we can do 784 00:40:11,117 --> 00:40:13,037 in our everyday lives 785 00:40:13,036 --> 00:40:16,246 that is radically different from my experience. 786 00:40:16,247 --> 00:40:18,627 ♪ ♪ 787 00:40:18,625 --> 00:40:20,915 - I think it is incredibly important 788 00:40:20,919 --> 00:40:24,379 for parents, for teachers, for administrators, 789 00:40:24,380 --> 00:40:28,380 for adults to understand how this happens, 790 00:40:28,384 --> 00:40:30,434 to be able to identify the stages of grooming 791 00:40:30,428 --> 00:40:34,098 and to feel confident and empowered 792 00:40:34,098 --> 00:40:36,018 to say something. 793 00:40:38,770 --> 00:40:42,270 - I don't really know what's next after this either, 794 00:40:42,273 --> 00:40:44,983 but I don't feel like I'm done yet. 795 00:40:44,984 --> 00:40:47,744 It's not really what I want to do with my life, 796 00:40:47,737 --> 00:40:48,857 but... 797 00:40:50,657 --> 00:40:53,117 To feel fulfilled within myself, 798 00:40:53,117 --> 00:40:56,117 like, I can't put it down. 799 00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:59,210 I feel like there's still so much more to do. 800 00:40:59,207 --> 00:41:01,667 ♪ ♪ 801 00:41:01,668 --> 00:41:04,338 - Hopefully, by telling your story, 802 00:41:04,337 --> 00:41:06,547 you can inspire other girls, 803 00:41:06,547 --> 00:41:08,127 you can raise awareness, 804 00:41:08,132 --> 00:41:10,132 you can create a vocabulary. 805 00:41:10,134 --> 00:41:12,724 You might even be able to change some laws. 806 00:41:12,720 --> 00:41:14,760 No matter how you come forward, 807 00:41:14,764 --> 00:41:20,024 it's a difficult, painful, ugly, messy process. 808 00:41:20,019 --> 00:41:23,899 It...it stays with you for your whole life. 809 00:41:23,898 --> 00:41:30,818 ♪ ♪ 56977

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