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[soft eerie music]
2
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♪ ♪
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- I had been, in total hon--
4
00:00:22,439 --> 00:00:23,769
called to the office
a couple times
5
00:00:23,774 --> 00:00:26,154
over "relationships
with students."
6
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And--
- For what specifically?
7
00:00:27,861 --> 00:00:29,401
- No, just the classic.
8
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It was the, you know,
9
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"girl hanging out
in your room," meal time,
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That kind of stuff.
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You know, and I'm just like,
"If you wanna investigate me,
12
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investigate me. Please."
13
00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:46,376
♪ ♪
14
00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:54,887
- Okay.
15
00:00:59,434 --> 00:01:03,694
What's public information
is he's under investigation
16
00:01:03,689 --> 00:01:08,489
on the TEA website
for misconduct with a student.
17
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:10,395
We don't know what happened,
18
00:01:10,404 --> 00:01:12,574
and I don't know when we will
know what happened.
19
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- He sat down with us.
20
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He's been talking to us
about this.
21
00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:21,116
You told him,
and we've had conversations
22
00:01:21,123 --> 00:01:23,133
about grooming,
inappropriate relationships,
23
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all of this stuff for...
- Yeah.
24
00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:26,131
- A long time.
25
00:01:26,128 --> 00:01:27,918
For me, it's pretty simple.
26
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Are these--
is all this stuff true?
27
00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:33,303
Like the--are these real?
28
00:01:33,302 --> 00:01:36,682
Are these real text messages
between you and this student?
29
00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,056
And what were you thinking?
30
00:01:42,519 --> 00:01:46,059
- I'm just tying myself
into knots about this.
31
00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:48,284
- I can't help but think about
32
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:51,235
the girl on the other end
of these allegations...
33
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♪ ♪
34
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Given the whole process
that we've gone through.
35
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Everybody who we've met along
this journey who's had--
36
00:01:59,328 --> 00:02:00,828
who's been in her shoes.
37
00:02:00,829 --> 00:02:01,959
I'm thinking about you.
38
00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,035
I'm thinking about Heaven.
39
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,670
I'm thinking about Alisson.
40
00:02:06,668 --> 00:02:08,458
Yeah, personally,
I would not feel good
41
00:02:08,462 --> 00:02:10,052
if we didn't do
our due diligence around this
42
00:02:10,047 --> 00:02:13,677
just because of knowing
how this cycle continues
43
00:02:13,675 --> 00:02:17,215
is by people not getting
to the bottom of it
44
00:02:17,220 --> 00:02:18,720
and not exposing it.
- Yep.
45
00:02:18,722 --> 00:02:20,642
- And I'm not gonna contribute
to that.
46
00:02:20,641 --> 00:02:22,851
And that's, like,
what I keep coming back to
47
00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:25,311
with this Tom thing.
48
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:26,312
You know?
49
00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:28,153
- [sighs]
50
00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:32,568
♪ ♪
51
00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:41,698
- I made the stupid-ass
decision of actually caring.
52
00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:45,123
Kids knew that they were safe,
53
00:02:45,123 --> 00:02:47,713
that they could come
and talk to me about anything.
54
00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:49,799
It was all done
with doors open
55
00:02:49,795 --> 00:02:53,005
and they told me
that I was being insubordinate
56
00:02:53,006 --> 00:02:56,796
by not following procedures,
which I don't quite understand.
57
00:02:56,802 --> 00:03:01,182
But I just felt like
I was used an example
58
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:03,351
all of a sudden. Done.
59
00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:06,900
Districts have become
over reactionary
60
00:03:06,895 --> 00:03:10,395
and the fact
that I'm being singled out
61
00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:11,939
is kind of painful.
62
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:18,242
For me, grooming
is a willful intention
63
00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:23,200
to drag the student into
a more intimate relationship.
64
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:25,753
You know, "Can I see you?"
65
00:03:25,747 --> 00:03:27,617
It could be sending an image.
66
00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:30,254
It could be, you know,
an inappropriate text,
67
00:03:30,252 --> 00:03:33,462
if you try to instigate
private meetings,
68
00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:36,553
"Send me a picture of you,"
69
00:03:36,550 --> 00:03:38,390
"Oh, my God, that looks hot,"
70
00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:40,715
wanting to talk off-hours--
71
00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:42,600
that kind of stuff.
72
00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:43,967
To me,
that would be an instance
73
00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:46,274
of definite grooming.
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♪ ♪
75
00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:53,857
- So we saw some posts
on social media about
76
00:03:53,859 --> 00:03:57,199
purported to be texts
between you and a student.
77
00:03:57,195 --> 00:03:58,315
- Mm-hmm.
- I don't know
78
00:03:58,321 --> 00:04:00,491
if those were accurate,
79
00:04:00,490 --> 00:04:02,740
if they were those texts
or if they were--
80
00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:04,162
what context
they were given in.
81
00:04:04,161 --> 00:04:06,251
Do you have--
have you seen those?
82
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:07,656
- Yes, I have.
83
00:04:07,664 --> 00:04:08,834
- Were those texts
that were between
84
00:04:08,832 --> 00:04:10,542
you and a student?
85
00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:11,592
- Yes, they were.
86
00:04:11,585 --> 00:04:14,495
♪ ♪
87
00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:17,554
I think that what the main
problem they had with it
88
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:19,589
is they don't understand
the way
89
00:04:19,593 --> 00:04:21,263
that the Spanish language
works.
90
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:24,141
There is two different ways
to say, you know--
91
00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:27,769
you know, "Love you,
have a great day, fantastic."
92
00:04:27,768 --> 00:04:30,978
You know, there's te quiero,
which is basically used
93
00:04:30,979 --> 00:04:33,269
in front of family
and friends.
94
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:36,533
You know, I say that
to all my former students.
95
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:38,316
Te quiero.
And there's the te amo,
96
00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:43,370
which is--that's a bit serious,
and you don't want to do that,
97
00:04:43,366 --> 00:04:46,156
um, in any way, shape, or form.
98
00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:49,961
So for me, all those texts
that I had--that I'd sent
99
00:04:49,956 --> 00:04:52,496
this particular student,
100
00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,341
were basically support.
101
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:55,746
"Hey, nice hair.
102
00:04:55,754 --> 00:04:58,514
Love the change of hair.
Fantastic."
103
00:04:58,507 --> 00:05:01,337
In retrospect, yeah, probably
shouldn't have sent them.
104
00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:03,473
But at the same time,
any kind of support
105
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:06,060
I would've be able
to give them,
106
00:05:06,056 --> 00:05:07,516
I don't regret that.
107
00:05:07,516 --> 00:05:09,726
♪ ♪
108
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:12,146
- If my daughter was getting
those text messages
109
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,225
from a teacher,
110
00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:16,981
I would be at the school
that same day.
111
00:05:16,983 --> 00:05:18,113
Period.
112
00:05:18,109 --> 00:05:19,859
End of story.
113
00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,861
Yeah, no, I don't believe him.
114
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:23,703
I don't believe him.
115
00:05:23,698 --> 00:05:25,488
I can't believe him.
116
00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:29,752
The story with Tom
has this greater kind of arc
117
00:05:29,746 --> 00:05:33,456
of not understanding
where the line is
118
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:36,288
and kind of placing the blame
on everybody else
119
00:05:36,294 --> 00:05:37,924
because he's not being able
to teach
120
00:05:37,921 --> 00:05:40,221
in the way that he wants
to teach.
121
00:05:40,215 --> 00:05:43,255
♪ ♪
122
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[light clattering]
[beep]
123
00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:04,865
[clattering]
124
00:06:06,366 --> 00:06:08,906
- We've been together
for 4 1/2 years now.
125
00:06:08,910 --> 00:06:10,750
I already know, like,
that is my life partner.
126
00:06:10,745 --> 00:06:13,325
You know, we are married
in our heads,
127
00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:16,421
even though it hasn't happened
in life yet.
128
00:06:16,418 --> 00:06:21,758
Heaven is the sweetest person
I know.
129
00:06:21,756 --> 00:06:23,336
You know, she's often described
as, you know,
130
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,471
like a ray of sunshine
and I feel like
131
00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:27,178
that is the true Heaven.
132
00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:30,098
At her core she is just
so sweet and loving.
133
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:33,808
But then no one sees
the hours she spends in bed
134
00:06:33,810 --> 00:06:36,060
just, like, crying
because there is so much--
135
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:38,322
or she feels like everything
is on her
136
00:06:38,315 --> 00:06:39,895
and she is constantly
double-checking
137
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:42,360
and second-guessing
every move that she makes.
138
00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,410
She doesn't expect
to be believed.
139
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:48,445
She comes prepared
with every single thing
140
00:06:48,450 --> 00:06:52,620
I need to explain to make sure
that you are going to trust me
141
00:06:52,621 --> 00:06:54,291
because that is what everyone
else showed her
142
00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:55,789
she needed to do.
143
00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:57,460
It feels like
it would be chaos
144
00:06:57,459 --> 00:06:59,629
to be in Heaven's head.
145
00:06:59,628 --> 00:07:04,048
[soft sentimental music]
146
00:07:04,049 --> 00:07:05,469
- The teachers had--
147
00:07:05,467 --> 00:07:07,757
[inhales, exhales]
148
00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:09,931
♪ ♪
149
00:07:09,929 --> 00:07:13,179
The teachers
and the administration
150
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:16,143
at my high school really made
me feel like it was my fault,
151
00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:18,104
and they played a role
152
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:21,824
in, like, that psychological,
like--
153
00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:24,146
where you can't trust yourself
154
00:07:24,152 --> 00:07:26,452
because you're like,
"Did I do something wrong?"
155
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:28,776
Like, it took me years
to understand
156
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:33,372
that the stuff he had said
to me to...
157
00:07:33,370 --> 00:07:35,500
make me trust him,
158
00:07:35,497 --> 00:07:37,747
the "advice"
that he was giving me,
159
00:07:37,749 --> 00:07:41,129
was to have me under his wing
so that I would trust him,
160
00:07:41,127 --> 00:07:42,127
so that...
161
00:07:42,128 --> 00:07:44,918
♪ ♪
162
00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:48,183
He could get to know
what he needed to know about me
163
00:07:48,176 --> 00:07:50,966
to manipulate me, to groom me.
164
00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:55,480
♪ ♪
165
00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:58,095
There were just--
there were just a few things
166
00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:00,523
that I feel like
now looking back on it,
167
00:08:00,522 --> 00:08:02,442
it was right in my face.
168
00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:05,690
With what I know now,
I just think
169
00:08:05,694 --> 00:08:07,284
he had a motive
170
00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:12,198
and he was willing to do
what it took to get his way.
171
00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:34,972
[soft foreboding music]
172
00:08:34,973 --> 00:08:36,983
- The first comment
that I can remember
173
00:08:36,975 --> 00:08:39,095
that was, like, off was--
174
00:08:39,102 --> 00:08:40,562
I was leaving one day
175
00:08:40,562 --> 00:08:43,692
and he kind of, like,
leaned back in his chair
176
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,280
and was just kind of, like,
looking at me
177
00:08:45,275 --> 00:08:47,145
and was like,
"I really like you."
178
00:08:47,152 --> 00:08:48,952
And I was like, "Thanks."
179
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:51,945
Like, "I like you too.
Like, cool.
180
00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,988
This class is awesome."
181
00:08:53,992 --> 00:08:56,792
And he said, "No, I'm serious.
I mean, I like-like you."
182
00:08:56,786 --> 00:09:02,666
♪ ♪
183
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,207
And so I didn't really think
anything of it.
184
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,880
I just kept going on.
185
00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:07,299
And then
there was another time
186
00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:10,007
where he'd said, you know,
187
00:09:10,008 --> 00:09:12,218
"I don't know
if I've told you this before,
188
00:09:12,218 --> 00:09:14,388
but I struggle with insomnia."
189
00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:15,557
And he said, "And you know,
190
00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:16,805
"when the school year
starts again,
191
00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:19,016
"that sometimes can ramp up,
192
00:09:19,017 --> 00:09:20,977
"and I have, like, a problem
with my insomnia,
193
00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:23,557
"but I haven't been feeling
that way
194
00:09:23,563 --> 00:09:26,823
since we started working
together."
195
00:09:27,692 --> 00:09:29,862
- Something about the
admiration in his eyes
196
00:09:29,861 --> 00:09:32,571
as I was childlike
seemed comforting.
197
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,322
Rarely was I rewarded
with kindness
198
00:09:34,324 --> 00:09:36,794
in moments of childlike
behavior.
199
00:09:36,785 --> 00:09:38,865
I remember being conditioned
to grow up
200
00:09:38,870 --> 00:09:41,580
before I knew
what growing up meant.
201
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:43,041
It made us closer.
202
00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,592
He coached me through
some of this pain,
203
00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:48,336
opened portal to poetry
204
00:09:48,338 --> 00:09:52,758
that allowed me to make
friends with pen and page.
205
00:09:52,759 --> 00:09:57,139
I felt he was mentoring me
by sharing common experiences
206
00:09:57,138 --> 00:09:58,848
or giving me advice of, like,
207
00:09:58,848 --> 00:10:00,138
"This won't hurt you
for so long.
208
00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:02,351
"You'll be able to move away
and go to college
209
00:10:02,352 --> 00:10:04,902
"and, like, you'll start
to shape your life and these--
210
00:10:04,896 --> 00:10:06,896
"you know, the stress
that you're feeling right now
211
00:10:06,898 --> 00:10:09,358
won't be forever,"
and so I felt like
212
00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:11,489
I was getting a benefit
in that.
213
00:10:11,486 --> 00:10:16,446
♪ ♪
214
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:17,739
He said, "Bring me everything
you've written
215
00:10:17,742 --> 00:10:19,292
in the last year."
216
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:22,745
And a lot of it was, like,
gushy and emotional
217
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:26,917
and, like, very embarrassing
if I had to read it now.
218
00:10:26,918 --> 00:10:29,708
He said, "You know, your work,
it's really immature."
219
00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:33,422
And I was surprised
and a little disappointed.
220
00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:37,854
I went from being good enough
that you invited me in
221
00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,766
to now I'm immature.
222
00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:43,265
So I kind of, like,
put that on myself
223
00:10:43,268 --> 00:10:46,648
of, like, what can I do
to be better?
224
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:49,186
I had been writing a poem
where I felt like
225
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:52,070
a boy I had a crush on
didn't like me back.
226
00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:55,108
He's like, "So you're feeling
disconnected from this person
227
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:57,743
"that you're trying
to connect with,
228
00:10:57,740 --> 00:11:01,290
"and sex is like
a really intimate thing,
229
00:11:01,286 --> 00:11:03,446
and, like, can we maybe write
about that?"
230
00:11:03,454 --> 00:11:05,964
I did not write about
those kinds of things.
231
00:11:05,957 --> 00:11:08,287
I didn't really talk about
those kinds of things.
232
00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:10,633
♪ ♪
233
00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:14,628
And so he gives me
this example.
234
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:16,892
And he says, you know,
"I wrote this last night.
235
00:11:16,885 --> 00:11:18,675
I was thinking about you."
236
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:23,058
And he'd written a line
about lips to lips
237
00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:25,057
creating
like a double entendre
238
00:11:25,059 --> 00:11:27,729
of lips on your face
239
00:11:27,729 --> 00:11:29,859
and lips on...
240
00:11:29,856 --> 00:11:35,026
♪ ♪
241
00:11:35,028 --> 00:11:37,198
One day he was like,
"You can come sit over here
242
00:11:37,197 --> 00:11:39,947
by my desk," and he was like,
"You can sit closer."
243
00:11:39,949 --> 00:11:42,289
I was standing and he stood up
244
00:11:42,285 --> 00:11:44,945
and he put his hands
on my face.
245
00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:49,334
And, you know, I said no.
246
00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:53,764
Um, not very loudly,
247
00:11:53,755 --> 00:11:56,215
but I was uncomfortable.
248
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,756
♪ ♪
249
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,720
And he kissed me.
250
00:12:01,721 --> 00:12:05,431
And that's kind of what
started, like,
251
00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:09,403
a slew of other inappropriate
252
00:12:09,395 --> 00:12:15,145
and very manipulative
and exploitive behavior.
253
00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:22,161
♪ ♪
254
00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:24,738
I did things
255
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:28,214
that I did not feel
comfortable doing.
256
00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:31,206
The reason why
I didn't scream or run
257
00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:36,379
or tell someone immediately
is because...
258
00:12:36,381 --> 00:12:41,801
when he would ask, you know,
"Can you go down on me?"...
259
00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:44,183
♪ ♪
260
00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:47,180
It was after an argument
261
00:12:47,183 --> 00:12:51,193
where he had said
that I was ungrateful,
262
00:12:51,187 --> 00:12:54,977
that I didn't value
the time and effort
263
00:12:54,983 --> 00:12:58,443
and...
264
00:12:58,444 --> 00:13:02,374
energy that he put
into helping me.
265
00:13:02,365 --> 00:13:05,365
[sniffs] You know, I was scared
that if I said something,
266
00:13:05,368 --> 00:13:07,448
I was going
to ruin someone's life
267
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:09,543
who maybe cared about me,
268
00:13:09,539 --> 00:13:12,079
and at that time,
I was certain that he cared.
269
00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:14,957
His cold hands.
270
00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:17,011
The sharpness in his voice.
271
00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:19,665
My isolation.
272
00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:23,224
And during that time,
I just didn't know what to do.
273
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:29,559
Like, way too much
for a 17-year-old to carry.
274
00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:35,819
The anxiety, like,
really started to kick in.
275
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,985
I was having trouble
keeping food down.
276
00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:42,025
I really wasn't eating
very much,
277
00:13:42,030 --> 00:13:44,370
not sleeping very much.
278
00:13:44,365 --> 00:13:48,655
He had told me, you know,
"Nobody can know,"
279
00:13:48,661 --> 00:13:51,541
and so I was pushing
my friends away.
280
00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:55,999
And so this world that I had
worked so hard to create,
281
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:59,092
where I had had friends
282
00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:02,258
and things I was
interested in doing...
283
00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:04,428
all of those things went away
284
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:08,057
because of the pressure
and the guilt
285
00:14:08,056 --> 00:14:14,726
and the restrictions
that he made me feel like
286
00:14:14,729 --> 00:14:16,939
would benefit me if I did them.
287
00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:21,069
If--if you don't tell,
then, like...
288
00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:23,069
things are gonna be okay.
289
00:14:24,572 --> 00:14:26,162
And so I just went along.
290
00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:29,237
I tried to follow the rules
as best as I could.
291
00:14:32,163 --> 00:14:34,753
But once he was gone,
after we'd been physical,
292
00:14:34,749 --> 00:14:37,339
he was everywhere,
lingering inside of me
293
00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:40,915
and I wanted to itch him
off my skin.
294
00:14:40,922 --> 00:14:43,882
[eerie music]
295
00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,933
♪ ♪
296
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,968
- Where can you go?
297
00:14:48,971 --> 00:14:50,721
Those are the people
you're around
298
00:14:50,723 --> 00:14:52,603
eight hours a day.
299
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,890
Everybody condones
this authority
300
00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,734
that these men have over you,
right?
301
00:14:56,729 --> 00:15:00,729
I'm being told by everybody
that these men
302
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,493
who are my teachers
303
00:15:02,485 --> 00:15:04,445
are the ones who are in charge
of me.
304
00:15:04,445 --> 00:15:07,615
That power dynamic, in a way,
is almost ultimate
305
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:10,195
because everyone around you
is telling you
306
00:15:10,201 --> 00:15:12,161
to trust these people.
307
00:15:12,161 --> 00:15:16,421
I was sort of bred
to be this person.
308
00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,455
- So if you took
sort of the culture of Texas
309
00:15:18,459 --> 00:15:22,459
and you sort of concentrated
it down to something,
310
00:15:22,463 --> 00:15:24,423
it was Little Elm. Very small.
311
00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:27,303
I think there were 2,500 people
when I graduated high school
312
00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:31,601
in the town.
It was run by white men.
313
00:15:31,597 --> 00:15:35,267
Having your education guided
by white men
314
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:41,148
and predominantly taught
by white men,
315
00:15:41,149 --> 00:15:44,859
having women's sports teams
run by white men,
316
00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:49,661
definitely gave the impression
and the idea
317
00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:51,527
that white men were superior.
318
00:15:51,534 --> 00:15:55,964
And when you have
a society culture
319
00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:59,375
where white men are
sort of ruling and in charge,
320
00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:01,495
it creates an environment
321
00:16:01,502 --> 00:16:03,342
that's not safe
for anyone else,
322
00:16:03,337 --> 00:16:05,837
certainly not safe for women
and girls,
323
00:16:05,840 --> 00:16:07,760
certainly not safe
for people of color,
324
00:16:07,758 --> 00:16:10,048
certainly not safe
for people who are different.
325
00:16:28,571 --> 00:16:30,161
[soft melancholic music]
326
00:16:30,156 --> 00:16:35,156
- I had told my friend
that things were going on
327
00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:39,291
and she had said, "This makes
me really uncomfortable.
328
00:16:39,290 --> 00:16:44,050
Do what you wanna do, but,
like, I can't handle this."
329
00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:46,005
And my best friend at the time,
330
00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:49,045
her mom decided
to call the police.
331
00:16:49,050 --> 00:16:53,430
And so I was pulled out
of my fifth period.
332
00:16:53,429 --> 00:16:56,469
And the police walk in and I'm
sitting there thinking like,
333
00:16:56,474 --> 00:16:58,524
"Oh, my God,
I know what that is."
334
00:16:58,517 --> 00:17:01,937
And so the police, you know,
they bring me upstairs
335
00:17:01,938 --> 00:17:04,518
into their resource officer
room
336
00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:08,243
and they start asking me
questions
337
00:17:08,236 --> 00:17:11,356
and I denied it, um,
338
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:13,454
until they said,
"This is happening
339
00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:16,369
to other people,
and we know it."
340
00:17:16,369 --> 00:17:19,459
And, like, a switch went off.
341
00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:21,915
There were so many other people
342
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:25,336
that felt that Mr. Meyers had
been inappropriate with them.
343
00:17:25,336 --> 00:17:27,796
You know,
some of my close friends
344
00:17:27,797 --> 00:17:31,547
that had said
he had abused them as well
345
00:17:31,551 --> 00:17:36,891
and I'm thinking, "How was he
abusing the both of us
346
00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:42,139
and we're sitting diagonal
from one another in class?"
347
00:17:42,144 --> 00:17:45,024
And then I was faced
with watching the news media
348
00:17:45,022 --> 00:17:47,322
broadcast the arrest
and seeing his picture
349
00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:50,606
and my story
in such a public way.
350
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:53,071
- 40-year-old Jason Meyers
has been arrested.
351
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:55,162
- Palmetto High School teacher
is behind bars.
352
00:17:55,157 --> 00:17:57,407
Jason Meyers is charged
with sexual battery.
353
00:17:57,410 --> 00:17:59,500
- Meyers accused
of having sex with a student.
354
00:17:59,495 --> 00:18:02,245
- A teacher who is accused
of sex crimes.
355
00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,168
- I was also very upset
356
00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:06,086
when I saw
they said my initials.
357
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:07,545
- Okay, so he's, uh...
358
00:18:07,545 --> 00:18:09,205
[indistinct chatter]
359
00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:11,263
Alleged to have committed
a sexual battery
360
00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:12,627
on a minor by an adult.
361
00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:14,013
Let me take a look at this.
362
00:18:14,010 --> 00:18:16,140
The minor has initials H. R.
363
00:18:16,137 --> 00:18:18,507
- Following his arrest,
364
00:18:18,514 --> 00:18:23,024
reporters showed up
at my house...
365
00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:28,569
followed my dad
on his route to work.
366
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:30,936
You know, and they come
and they bang on the door,
367
00:18:30,943 --> 00:18:32,323
and you don't know
what's going on.
368
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:35,070
You open it and people
are just screaming questions
369
00:18:35,072 --> 00:18:38,742
at you and I remember crying.
370
00:18:38,743 --> 00:18:40,333
By the time
I was back at school,
371
00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:41,908
everyone knew that it was me.
372
00:18:41,912 --> 00:18:46,422
My world was falling apart,
and...
373
00:18:46,417 --> 00:18:48,247
I have to go back to school
374
00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:50,462
because I still need to get
into college
375
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,263
and life needs to have
some sense of normalcy.
376
00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:57,137
♪ ♪
377
00:18:57,136 --> 00:19:01,716
And I have my teacher,
and I sit down
378
00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:03,604
and she starts talking about
379
00:19:03,601 --> 00:19:07,441
"The girls involved
with this are lying."
380
00:19:07,438 --> 00:19:10,478
Jason Meyers
is a great teacher.
381
00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:13,363
He's a great man.
382
00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:17,321
Very, very quickly
it was this culture of, like,
383
00:19:17,323 --> 00:19:19,833
he's with us
384
00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:23,405
and you're not.
385
00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:26,292
[exhales]
386
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,998
[dark unsettling music]
387
00:19:30,002 --> 00:19:33,342
- Nobody knows why
there's such a huge protection
388
00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:35,219
with Jason Meyers.
389
00:19:35,216 --> 00:19:37,386
Once a teacher gets arrested,
390
00:19:37,385 --> 00:19:40,965
it has to go to the Department
of Education in Tallahassee
391
00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:42,771
for a licensure investigation,
392
00:19:42,765 --> 00:19:45,555
and nothing was done
in Tallahassee
393
00:19:45,559 --> 00:19:46,559
with Jason Meyers.
394
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:47,850
I don't know why.
395
00:19:47,853 --> 00:19:51,323
In 2016,
'17, '18, '19, and '20,
396
00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:53,355
his license
wasn't even touched.
397
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,989
♪ ♪
398
00:19:55,986 --> 00:19:58,526
Parents have come out
to the school board meetings
399
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,121
to talk about
the school district's penchant
400
00:20:01,117 --> 00:20:03,237
for not caring.
401
00:20:03,244 --> 00:20:07,084
- There have been teachers who
have committed sexual crimes
402
00:20:07,081 --> 00:20:08,871
on our children,
and I want to know why
403
00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:11,094
these teachers
are being protected
404
00:20:11,085 --> 00:20:13,415
and not being held accountable.
405
00:20:13,421 --> 00:20:15,801
- This is a real issue.
406
00:20:15,798 --> 00:20:18,428
You have kids
who are out of the system,
407
00:20:18,426 --> 00:20:19,926
and five years later,
they're waiting
408
00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:22,557
to see their abuser in court.
409
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:24,845
You guys allow this.
410
00:20:24,849 --> 00:20:26,809
You should be ashamed
of yourself.
411
00:20:26,809 --> 00:20:33,689
♪ ♪
412
00:20:35,609 --> 00:20:38,699
- It's unacceptable,
and it's gotta change.
413
00:20:38,696 --> 00:20:41,236
So we filed a lawsuit
under Title IX
414
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,330
to hold the school board
accountable
415
00:20:44,326 --> 00:20:47,286
for failing to do its job.
416
00:20:47,288 --> 00:20:48,958
It wasn't
to just chase the money,
417
00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:50,366
just get the quick settlement,
418
00:20:50,374 --> 00:20:52,384
and let them sweep it
under the rug.
419
00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:57,296
It was to get the point across
that the system is broken.
420
00:20:57,298 --> 00:20:59,088
I don't think
the school board ever thought
421
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,841
we would see it through.
422
00:21:01,844 --> 00:21:03,894
I think they thought
that they could throw money
423
00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:05,428
at the problem
and it would go away.
424
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,870
[somber music]
425
00:21:26,869 --> 00:21:31,459
- The civil case happened
in fall of 2021.
426
00:21:31,457 --> 00:21:34,377
- The news media followed
the case considerably.
427
00:21:35,878 --> 00:21:37,668
- It's a teacher sex case.
428
00:21:37,671 --> 00:21:40,971
- What did Miami-Dade
school district leaders know?
429
00:21:40,966 --> 00:21:42,926
- The school got a warning
about Meyers
430
00:21:42,927 --> 00:21:44,887
years before his arrest.
431
00:21:44,887 --> 00:21:46,257
- Meyers' former student
432
00:21:46,263 --> 00:21:47,723
has already filed a lawsuit.
433
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:49,233
- The student has filed suit.
434
00:21:49,225 --> 00:21:51,845
- She is Jane Doe in a lawsuit
435
00:21:51,852 --> 00:21:54,192
filed against
the Miami-Dade school board.
436
00:21:54,188 --> 00:21:56,068
- Suing the school board
was really difficult
437
00:21:56,065 --> 00:21:59,235
because it was me versus them.
438
00:21:59,235 --> 00:22:03,065
It wasn't the state
versus Meyers.
439
00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:06,122
And so they were going
to attack me,
440
00:22:06,116 --> 00:22:07,946
and they did.
441
00:22:07,952 --> 00:22:10,002
They victim blame.
442
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:12,285
They say, "Well, here are all
of the other things
443
00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:13,959
"that were wrong.
444
00:22:13,958 --> 00:22:15,668
Wasn't us."
445
00:22:15,668 --> 00:22:18,958
- They would go to any length
to avoid accountability,
446
00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:21,423
and so they threw money
at the problem
447
00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:24,433
by hiring so-called experts
448
00:22:24,426 --> 00:22:28,056
to support
their theory of defense.
449
00:22:28,055 --> 00:22:31,925
They also had a psychologist,
Dr. Shelia Rapa,
450
00:22:31,934 --> 00:22:34,904
who evaluated Heaven.
451
00:22:34,895 --> 00:22:39,475
Dr. Rapa was adamant
that she was not traumatized
452
00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:41,783
in any way and did not suffer
453
00:22:41,777 --> 00:22:44,447
from any sort
of mental health disorder.
454
00:22:44,446 --> 00:22:47,366
The other attack
they're making
455
00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:50,116
is social media posts.
456
00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:53,119
They thought that would
support their theory
457
00:22:53,122 --> 00:22:55,712
that she's doing fine,
that she's not damaged,
458
00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:58,498
just like their experts said.
459
00:22:58,502 --> 00:23:01,302
- It was just a really
ridiculous, comical thing,
460
00:23:01,297 --> 00:23:03,837
honestly, to us,
because they just tried so hard
461
00:23:03,841 --> 00:23:08,011
to paint that narrative
using social media.
462
00:23:08,012 --> 00:23:10,562
- We are
in the misogynist culture
463
00:23:10,556 --> 00:23:13,726
where women,
if they're not believed,
464
00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:17,096
then, you know, why would you
believe a teenager, especially?
465
00:23:17,104 --> 00:23:19,024
You know, there's something
ageist about this too
466
00:23:19,023 --> 00:23:20,903
that they couldn't know
what's happening
467
00:23:20,900 --> 00:23:22,320
or what did they do
to contribute
468
00:23:22,318 --> 00:23:23,358
to that situation?
469
00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:27,070
♪ ♪
470
00:23:27,072 --> 00:23:30,332
- People were
victim blaming me.
471
00:23:30,326 --> 00:23:31,736
There's been a lot of that.
472
00:23:31,744 --> 00:23:34,584
But I think I was
the number one perpetrator
473
00:23:34,580 --> 00:23:36,920
of the victim blaming.
474
00:23:36,916 --> 00:23:39,706
I was the person who did wrong,
475
00:23:39,710 --> 00:23:41,920
and then I was the person
that could take responsibility
476
00:23:41,921 --> 00:23:43,461
for it, and so in a way,
477
00:23:43,464 --> 00:23:46,094
I was taking responsibility
for everybody
478
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:48,181
so that I could make it okay.
479
00:23:48,177 --> 00:23:51,137
- It's just so sad, honestly,
480
00:23:51,138 --> 00:23:55,728
and it just ruins
so many girls' confidence
481
00:23:55,726 --> 00:24:00,056
and it's a lot of unlearning
for a lot of people.
482
00:24:00,064 --> 00:24:02,654
You start that guilt cycle
so early.
483
00:24:02,650 --> 00:24:04,610
It's really hard as an adult
to come out of that.
484
00:24:04,610 --> 00:24:06,320
No matter how much therapy
you get,
485
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:08,860
sometimes that guilt and shame
just lives inside you.
486
00:24:08,864 --> 00:24:15,754
♪ ♪
487
00:24:23,462 --> 00:24:26,172
- It's hard for me
to talk about...
488
00:24:26,173 --> 00:24:30,143
♪ ♪
489
00:24:30,135 --> 00:24:34,425
The sex...that happened.
490
00:24:34,431 --> 00:24:39,521
♪ ♪
491
00:24:39,520 --> 00:24:44,780
I feel a lot of, like, shame
and guilt around that.
492
00:24:44,775 --> 00:24:48,485
And the defense team
has kind of, like,
493
00:24:48,487 --> 00:24:51,697
really pushed to reinforce
this, like,
494
00:24:51,699 --> 00:24:53,529
"Well, you could've screamed.
495
00:24:53,534 --> 00:24:55,454
"You could've ran away.
496
00:24:55,452 --> 00:24:58,292
You could have told someone
immediately."
497
00:24:58,288 --> 00:25:02,078
- He gradually progressed
the sexual activity.
498
00:25:02,084 --> 00:25:05,254
There were instances
of fellatio,
499
00:25:05,254 --> 00:25:08,764
cunnilingus,
and sexual intercourse
500
00:25:08,757 --> 00:25:13,297
inside the classroom,
behind the closed door,
501
00:25:13,303 --> 00:25:15,433
right under
the school board's noses.
502
00:25:15,431 --> 00:25:18,231
- I remember kicking my legs,
503
00:25:18,225 --> 00:25:22,645
right, left, right, my feet
unable to reach the ground.
504
00:25:22,646 --> 00:25:24,356
I turned to him, embarrassed,
505
00:25:24,356 --> 00:25:27,066
like a child who suddenly
became self-aware
506
00:25:27,067 --> 00:25:30,447
of the space they took,
noise they created.
507
00:25:30,446 --> 00:25:33,616
He met my doe eyes
with eagerness--
508
00:25:33,615 --> 00:25:37,995
calculated, studious,
ready to pounce.
509
00:25:37,995 --> 00:25:40,285
I was a kid.
510
00:25:40,289 --> 00:25:42,169
[sniffles]
511
00:25:42,166 --> 00:25:45,126
[moody music]
512
00:25:45,127 --> 00:25:48,297
♪ ♪
513
00:25:48,297 --> 00:25:51,127
- She had other dreams.
She had other passions.
514
00:25:51,133 --> 00:25:53,183
And they took that from her
515
00:25:53,177 --> 00:25:55,097
because they didn't
do their jobs.
516
00:25:57,556 --> 00:25:59,926
- They really came after
my character
517
00:25:59,933 --> 00:26:03,353
and my family in that,
518
00:26:03,353 --> 00:26:07,443
and so it's turned
into something more
519
00:26:07,441 --> 00:26:09,151
than just what happened to me.
520
00:26:09,151 --> 00:26:11,281
♪ ♪
521
00:26:11,278 --> 00:26:13,568
And it has strained
relationships
522
00:26:13,572 --> 00:26:17,202
with people
in my immediate family.
523
00:26:17,201 --> 00:26:20,451
And now I'm living
with the aftermath of that...
524
00:26:20,454 --> 00:26:24,544
♪ ♪
525
00:26:24,541 --> 00:26:27,711
And I don't know where some
of the people in my family fall
526
00:26:27,711 --> 00:26:30,551
in my life since that.
527
00:26:32,466 --> 00:26:35,546
- She kind of sacrificed
her family by doing this
528
00:26:35,552 --> 00:26:38,012
not knowingly that she was
sacrificing her family,
529
00:26:38,013 --> 00:26:39,773
but her family didn't want her
530
00:26:39,765 --> 00:26:42,265
to go through
with the civil lawsuit.
531
00:26:42,267 --> 00:26:45,727
And I think in a lot of ways,
Heaven is alone right now.
532
00:26:45,729 --> 00:26:48,109
- This stuff is so heavy.
533
00:26:48,107 --> 00:26:50,437
It's, like, hard for me
to, like, make friends
534
00:26:50,442 --> 00:26:53,452
or be myself around people
535
00:26:53,445 --> 00:26:55,815
because this is my life
right now.
536
00:26:55,823 --> 00:26:57,033
If this wouldn't have happened,
537
00:26:57,032 --> 00:26:59,542
my life would have been
very different.
538
00:26:59,535 --> 00:27:02,285
I don't know
that I would necessarily wish
539
00:27:02,287 --> 00:27:05,867
for it to be different
because I do feel like
540
00:27:05,874 --> 00:27:08,594
a strong sense of purpose
with what I'm doing
541
00:27:08,585 --> 00:27:11,415
because I think
it will make a difference,
542
00:27:11,421 --> 00:27:14,551
so I'm happy to do it.
543
00:27:14,550 --> 00:27:17,050
♪ ♪
544
00:27:33,193 --> 00:27:35,953
- Once trial is over,
we sit down at a restaurant
545
00:27:35,946 --> 00:27:38,116
and we're waiting
for the verdict.
546
00:27:38,115 --> 00:27:40,025
And the second we sit down,
Mark is calling me
547
00:27:40,033 --> 00:27:41,333
and he says,
"We have a verdict."
548
00:27:41,326 --> 00:27:42,906
We ran into the courtroom
549
00:27:42,911 --> 00:27:44,291
and I'm sitting there
and it's, like,
550
00:27:44,288 --> 00:27:49,168
very, very, very quiet,
and the jury comes out.
551
00:27:49,167 --> 00:27:51,297
The jury says yes,
552
00:27:51,295 --> 00:27:53,545
we found Miami-Dade County
Public Schools
553
00:27:53,547 --> 00:27:55,257
to be deliberately
indifferent.
554
00:27:55,257 --> 00:27:57,507
It's, like, super reassuring
555
00:27:57,509 --> 00:27:59,599
'cause you're hearing
one by one the people
556
00:27:59,595 --> 00:28:02,215
that have watched it
from that outside perspective.
557
00:28:02,222 --> 00:28:05,232
They read the verdict, and it
was a $6-million verdict.
558
00:28:05,225 --> 00:28:07,635
[upbeat music]
559
00:28:07,644 --> 00:28:09,774
- And honestly, at that point,
560
00:28:09,771 --> 00:28:12,521
I could feel Heaven
sitting next to me
561
00:28:12,524 --> 00:28:15,244
have this cathartic moment.
562
00:28:15,235 --> 00:28:18,905
I, myself, was just overwhelmed
563
00:28:18,906 --> 00:28:23,236
with pride and hope.
564
00:28:23,243 --> 00:28:25,913
♪ ♪
565
00:28:25,913 --> 00:28:28,623
- And when we walked outside,
it was--
566
00:28:28,624 --> 00:28:31,044
it was like the skies
had just opened up
567
00:28:31,043 --> 00:28:33,253
and it just started to pour.
568
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:36,260
And I started crying,
569
00:28:36,256 --> 00:28:39,796
and I felt like
it was my grandmother.
570
00:28:39,801 --> 00:28:41,681
The streets were flooded.
571
00:28:41,678 --> 00:28:45,178
It was raining so hard
and it was so windy.
572
00:28:45,182 --> 00:28:46,932
And I just...
573
00:28:46,934 --> 00:28:49,854
[soft sentimental music]
574
00:28:49,853 --> 00:28:51,863
♪ ♪
575
00:28:51,855 --> 00:28:55,105
In a weird way, I felt like it
was her saying, like,
576
00:28:55,108 --> 00:28:58,528
"Good job. You saw it through."
577
00:28:58,528 --> 00:29:02,818
- We're inspired that we won
in the civil case,
578
00:29:02,824 --> 00:29:07,044
but we are discouraged
that it's been almost six years
579
00:29:07,037 --> 00:29:12,037
and yet the criminal trial
still has not occurred.
580
00:29:12,042 --> 00:29:16,632
Mr. Meyers was arrested
in February 2016.
581
00:29:16,630 --> 00:29:19,930
Criminal charges
were filed thereafter.
582
00:29:19,925 --> 00:29:23,465
He's being criminally
prosecuted as he should.
583
00:29:23,470 --> 00:29:26,140
And here we are in 2022,
584
00:29:26,139 --> 00:29:30,189
and he has yet to face justice.
585
00:29:30,185 --> 00:29:32,555
They're hoping
that they will exhaust Heaven,
586
00:29:32,562 --> 00:29:35,192
that she will lose the will
to fight,
587
00:29:35,190 --> 00:29:37,990
that she will lose the courage
to come back to court
588
00:29:37,985 --> 00:29:43,155
and tell her story again to try
to get a criminal prosecution,
589
00:29:43,156 --> 00:29:47,406
but that's not--
that's not the girl I know.
590
00:29:59,548 --> 00:30:00,668
- Do you think you'll want
a whole one of these rolls
591
00:30:00,674 --> 00:30:01,934
or just, like, half?
592
00:30:01,925 --> 00:30:04,085
- Um, just a half, please.
- Okay.
593
00:30:04,094 --> 00:30:06,144
- Thank you.
594
00:30:06,138 --> 00:30:08,928
I wish you could come with me
to Miami.
595
00:30:08,932 --> 00:30:10,602
- I know, baby.
When is that?
596
00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:12,140
A couple weeks?
597
00:30:12,144 --> 00:30:13,694
- Yeah, I am--
598
00:30:13,687 --> 00:30:18,857
I have a hearing in two weeks
599
00:30:18,859 --> 00:30:21,489
to see if it's actually gonna
go to trial.
600
00:30:21,486 --> 00:30:22,986
- Okay.
Yeah, I was gonna ask you
601
00:30:22,988 --> 00:30:26,738
how confident you are
that it actually does happen
602
00:30:26,742 --> 00:30:29,832
as it's planned.
603
00:30:29,828 --> 00:30:32,788
- [sighs] Yeah, that's, um,
that's the question, right?
604
00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:34,539
[soft music]
605
00:30:34,541 --> 00:30:35,751
- I'm definitely afraid
606
00:30:35,751 --> 00:30:38,381
that they decide
he's innocent,
607
00:30:38,378 --> 00:30:41,258
that it just becomes
the antithesis
608
00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:44,836
to what happened
with the other trial
609
00:30:44,843 --> 00:30:46,223
because I don't know
what kind of effect
610
00:30:46,219 --> 00:30:48,719
that would have on Heaven.
611
00:30:48,722 --> 00:30:51,022
You could argue this
is a more significant case
612
00:30:51,016 --> 00:30:52,726
than the other one 'cause
this is the actual person
613
00:30:52,726 --> 00:30:55,306
who did this to you, this was
the personal connection,
614
00:30:55,312 --> 00:30:56,562
the person
that built the trust
615
00:30:56,563 --> 00:30:58,153
and then ripped that away
616
00:30:58,148 --> 00:31:00,728
and was doing this
to so many other people.
617
00:31:00,734 --> 00:31:05,074
I'm really afraid
of that somehow going wrong,
618
00:31:05,072 --> 00:31:07,782
of somehow
they find him innocent.
619
00:31:07,783 --> 00:31:09,913
Our whole relationship
I have wanted
620
00:31:09,910 --> 00:31:12,120
these court cases to happen.
621
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:14,870
They have been
the biggest, darkest cloud
622
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,963
hanging over Heaven
623
00:31:16,958 --> 00:31:19,338
for the entire time
I've known her,
624
00:31:19,336 --> 00:31:22,256
and it has felt like
that is holding her back
625
00:31:22,255 --> 00:31:27,135
from being able
to see a future,
626
00:31:27,135 --> 00:31:30,215
to be able to look forward
to anything ahead of us.
627
00:31:30,222 --> 00:31:33,732
Like, we talk about a life
together, but you can tell
628
00:31:33,725 --> 00:31:37,015
that it doesn't feel real
to her.
629
00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:40,110
- Your partner's almost
as important as your friends
630
00:31:40,107 --> 00:31:43,527
and--or your therapist
or your parents or whatever
631
00:31:43,527 --> 00:31:46,277
and that they're kind of going
through this with you.
632
00:31:46,279 --> 00:31:48,619
- When Cheryl told me
she was thinking about
633
00:31:48,615 --> 00:31:52,655
doing something, I thought
maybe it would be a play.
634
00:31:52,661 --> 00:31:56,621
My first reaction was I wanted
to protect her from it.
635
00:31:56,623 --> 00:32:00,173
It seems scary to me
to put it all out there.
636
00:32:00,168 --> 00:32:02,878
But then once she started
sort of digging into it
637
00:32:02,879 --> 00:32:07,719
and I could see
it was a release for her,
638
00:32:07,717 --> 00:32:09,797
it never leaves you.
639
00:32:09,803 --> 00:32:14,183
That kind of violation
of who you are,
640
00:32:14,182 --> 00:32:16,182
she'll never be able
to forget it.
641
00:32:16,184 --> 00:32:18,444
It'll never leave her,
but I'm hoping
642
00:32:18,436 --> 00:32:20,266
she can find some peace.
643
00:32:27,237 --> 00:32:29,487
- The reason why I like
to go through these
644
00:32:29,489 --> 00:32:33,289
is because it gives me
a good frame of reference
645
00:32:33,285 --> 00:32:35,445
for what's gonna be asked
of me again
646
00:32:35,453 --> 00:32:37,503
when I go to trial.
647
00:32:37,497 --> 00:32:43,337
So something that I think
the defense will try to do
648
00:32:43,336 --> 00:32:46,716
during the case is try to ask
me really specific questions
649
00:32:46,715 --> 00:32:49,005
to have the jury hear me say,
"I don't know"
650
00:32:49,009 --> 00:32:50,469
as many times as possible
651
00:32:50,468 --> 00:32:53,428
because if I'm, like,
the lead witness on a case
652
00:32:53,430 --> 00:32:54,930
and I don't know,
653
00:32:54,931 --> 00:32:56,771
"She doesn't remember
anything," like,
654
00:32:56,766 --> 00:33:00,096
that's like their best shot
at saying he's not guilty.
655
00:33:00,103 --> 00:33:03,523
Beyond a reasonable doubt
is a hard thing to prove.
656
00:33:03,523 --> 00:33:05,613
I'm the only one
that the judge has approved
657
00:33:05,609 --> 00:33:07,489
to testify.
658
00:33:07,485 --> 00:33:11,355
Like, it's on me
to carry that through.
659
00:33:11,364 --> 00:33:13,744
And it's a lot.
660
00:33:13,742 --> 00:33:16,662
[melancholic piano music]
661
00:33:16,661 --> 00:33:22,081
♪ ♪
662
00:33:22,083 --> 00:33:23,133
- Good morning, Judge.
Jessie Freeman
663
00:33:23,126 --> 00:33:24,536
on behalf of the state.
664
00:33:24,544 --> 00:33:25,884
- We have sounding on Thursday.
665
00:33:25,879 --> 00:33:26,839
You wanna go ahead
and let me know
666
00:33:26,838 --> 00:33:28,418
what the status is now?
667
00:33:28,423 --> 00:33:30,303
- Yes, Your Honor.
State's ready.
668
00:33:30,300 --> 00:33:33,890
And I do have Heaven,
the victim on the case.
669
00:33:33,887 --> 00:33:35,927
She is present on the Zoom
as well as my trial partner.
670
00:33:35,931 --> 00:33:37,471
That date does work.
671
00:33:37,474 --> 00:33:39,774
We were looking forward
to going to trial now.
672
00:33:39,768 --> 00:33:41,058
- Defense is ready as well.
673
00:33:41,061 --> 00:33:42,901
That said, there are issues
674
00:33:42,896 --> 00:33:46,316
with the practicality
of it going on March 14th.
675
00:33:46,316 --> 00:33:53,236
♪ ♪
676
00:33:55,909 --> 00:33:58,039
- Okay, good morning.
677
00:33:58,036 --> 00:34:00,286
- Good morning.
- Morning.
678
00:34:00,288 --> 00:34:03,248
- Judge, state's ready
to begin trial on 4/25.
679
00:34:03,250 --> 00:34:05,210
The lead detective,
Detective Web,
680
00:34:05,210 --> 00:34:10,630
is in a--about a month-long
training in Alabama.
681
00:34:10,632 --> 00:34:13,012
What I discussed
with Mr. Horenstein
682
00:34:13,009 --> 00:34:16,179
was possibly picking a jury
the week of 4/25
683
00:34:16,179 --> 00:34:19,099
and then starting testimony
on the week of 5/2
684
00:34:19,099 --> 00:34:21,729
or in the alternative,
having Detective Web testify
685
00:34:21,726 --> 00:34:24,846
via Zoom at the trial
during the week of 4/25.
686
00:34:24,854 --> 00:34:27,364
- Defense,
what's your preference?
687
00:34:27,357 --> 00:34:28,857
- Your Honor,
I'll object to both.
688
00:34:28,858 --> 00:34:30,608
- Okay.
689
00:34:30,610 --> 00:34:32,450
- Having the detective--
the lead detective on the case
690
00:34:32,445 --> 00:34:34,445
via Zoom is not going to work.
691
00:34:34,447 --> 00:34:35,447
- I'm gonna be honest with you.
692
00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:38,658
We start Monday.
693
00:34:38,660 --> 00:34:41,080
I don't know that we'd be able
to pick a jury in a day.
694
00:34:41,079 --> 00:34:43,079
- Okay.
- Tuesday I have to finish
695
00:34:43,081 --> 00:34:46,131
no later than 4:00.
- Okay.
696
00:34:46,126 --> 00:34:48,296
- We're all gonna make
our best efforts,
697
00:34:48,295 --> 00:34:50,375
but I can't promise you
when it's gonna be done.
698
00:34:50,380 --> 00:34:53,470
- The State chose
to wait six years
699
00:34:53,466 --> 00:34:54,926
to decide
that they wanted the trial
700
00:34:54,926 --> 00:34:56,386
and waited until--
- Right.
701
00:34:56,386 --> 00:34:57,886
I understand
what you're saying.
702
00:34:57,887 --> 00:34:59,347
You know, it's last-minute.
703
00:34:59,347 --> 00:35:02,307
I 100% agree,
but they're still timely,
704
00:35:02,309 --> 00:35:04,559
so I don't think that I should
impose the most
705
00:35:04,561 --> 00:35:07,231
onerous sanction
and have her stricken.
706
00:35:07,230 --> 00:35:12,650
♪ ♪
707
00:35:14,321 --> 00:35:17,281
[soft tense music]
708
00:35:17,282 --> 00:35:18,872
♪ ♪
709
00:35:18,867 --> 00:35:20,697
If we're not gonna be in trial,
710
00:35:20,702 --> 00:35:24,002
I already have another trial
set second, waiting to go.
711
00:35:23,997 --> 00:35:25,537
[laughs]
- Yeah.
712
00:35:25,540 --> 00:35:28,750
- Thank you, Mr. Meyers and...
713
00:35:28,752 --> 00:35:32,962
the rest of the people
that are on the Zoom.
714
00:35:32,964 --> 00:35:39,974
♪ ♪
715
00:35:39,971 --> 00:35:42,391
- It's just hard.
It's just really hard
716
00:35:42,390 --> 00:35:44,350
on my emotions and...
717
00:35:44,351 --> 00:35:47,351
[cries]
718
00:35:47,354 --> 00:35:54,364
♪ ♪
719
00:35:56,863 --> 00:35:59,123
That's, like, the reality
of being victim.
720
00:35:59,115 --> 00:36:01,825
It's...
721
00:36:01,826 --> 00:36:05,366
extensive, unreasonable delays,
722
00:36:05,372 --> 00:36:08,792
lots of back and forth.
723
00:36:08,792 --> 00:36:10,712
Does waiting six years
for trial,
724
00:36:10,710 --> 00:36:12,630
is that "speedy"?
725
00:36:12,629 --> 00:36:19,549
♪ ♪
726
00:36:36,444 --> 00:36:40,034
- I think too often we...
727
00:36:40,031 --> 00:36:44,041
we put pressure on the victims
to explain to us
728
00:36:44,035 --> 00:36:46,495
their trauma, their experience
729
00:36:46,496 --> 00:36:52,416
to teach us and educate us
about what they've gone through
730
00:36:52,419 --> 00:36:54,999
so that we have
a better understanding of it.
731
00:36:55,004 --> 00:36:59,094
And that's putting too much
of the onus on the victims
732
00:36:59,092 --> 00:37:02,602
to take responsibility
for what was, in fact,
733
00:37:02,595 --> 00:37:06,425
done to them by somebody else.
734
00:37:08,852 --> 00:37:11,522
We don't spend enough time
pointing the finger
735
00:37:11,521 --> 00:37:13,941
at the perpetrator
of the crime.
736
00:37:13,940 --> 00:37:15,190
We need to talk about
737
00:37:15,191 --> 00:37:17,901
how the perpetrators
need to change,
738
00:37:17,902 --> 00:37:22,452
not how we need
to avoid being victimized.
739
00:37:26,286 --> 00:37:29,616
[moody music]
740
00:37:29,622 --> 00:37:32,582
♪ ♪
741
00:37:32,584 --> 00:37:35,174
You know,
people keep asking me
742
00:37:35,170 --> 00:37:40,510
if I feel like
I've found resolution
743
00:37:40,508 --> 00:37:43,848
or if I feel healed in any way.
744
00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:48,639
And I look
at the different ways
745
00:37:48,641 --> 00:37:52,851
that Heaven and Alisson and I
746
00:37:52,854 --> 00:37:56,234
have all processed
through our trauma.
747
00:37:56,232 --> 00:37:58,402
And for Alisson,
748
00:37:58,401 --> 00:38:04,031
she sat in a room and spent
time with her journals
749
00:38:04,032 --> 00:38:06,452
and then she wrote a memoir.
750
00:38:06,451 --> 00:38:13,001
And for Heaven, she decided
that the legal system
751
00:38:12,999 --> 00:38:15,539
was the way that she was going
to process through her trauma.
752
00:38:15,543 --> 00:38:18,423
♪ ♪
753
00:38:18,421 --> 00:38:21,261
For me, I decided
to make a documentary
754
00:38:21,257 --> 00:38:23,797
because that was the way
that I processed
755
00:38:23,802 --> 00:38:26,012
through my pain,
and I'm a filmmaker,
756
00:38:26,012 --> 00:38:28,852
and so that's how I wanted
to process my trauma.
757
00:38:28,848 --> 00:38:33,518
♪ ♪
758
00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:39,070
I think in looking at our three
very different experiences,
759
00:38:39,067 --> 00:38:41,857
what I've realized is,
760
00:38:41,861 --> 00:38:46,121
at the end of that road...
761
00:38:46,115 --> 00:38:48,695
in a way,
there is no resolution
762
00:38:48,701 --> 00:38:54,751
because there is no way to tie
this experience up in a bow
763
00:38:54,749 --> 00:38:58,669
and, you know, put it away
on a shelf.
764
00:38:58,670 --> 00:38:59,960
[Daniel Farrant's
"Who's Gonna Fix It"]
765
00:38:59,963 --> 00:39:01,383
- ♪ Don't you know
that you gotta ♪
766
00:39:01,381 --> 00:39:03,971
♪ Take some of the blame ♪
767
00:39:05,927 --> 00:39:09,557
♪ You said those unkind words
'cause you think it's a game ♪
768
00:39:09,556 --> 00:39:11,056
♪ Well, it's not ♪
769
00:39:11,057 --> 00:39:15,647
♪ And it's got real serious ♪
770
00:39:15,645 --> 00:39:16,935
♪ Who's gonna fix it? ♪
771
00:39:16,938 --> 00:39:18,108
♪ Time to give it up ♪
772
00:39:18,106 --> 00:39:19,646
♪ Look around, get found ♪
773
00:39:19,649 --> 00:39:21,899
♪ But it don't
make a new sound ♪
774
00:39:21,901 --> 00:39:24,611
♪ No joke 'cause it's broke ♪
775
00:39:24,612 --> 00:39:27,452
♪ Who's gonna fix it? ♪
776
00:39:27,448 --> 00:39:29,778
♪ Who's gonna
fix it? ♪
777
00:39:29,784 --> 00:39:36,714
♪ ♪
778
00:39:52,932 --> 00:39:56,232
- This is what we've been
living with forever,
779
00:39:56,227 --> 00:39:59,857
so it would have
to take something enormous
780
00:39:59,856 --> 00:40:01,646
to change here.
781
00:40:01,649 --> 00:40:06,319
When you think about teaching
children about consent,
782
00:40:06,321 --> 00:40:08,991
that's actually a huge thing,
783
00:40:08,990 --> 00:40:11,120
but it's something small
that we can do
784
00:40:11,117 --> 00:40:13,037
in our everyday lives
785
00:40:13,036 --> 00:40:16,246
that is radically different
from my experience.
786
00:40:16,247 --> 00:40:18,627
♪ ♪
787
00:40:18,625 --> 00:40:20,915
- I think
it is incredibly important
788
00:40:20,919 --> 00:40:24,379
for parents, for teachers,
for administrators,
789
00:40:24,380 --> 00:40:28,380
for adults to understand
how this happens,
790
00:40:28,384 --> 00:40:30,434
to be able to identify
the stages of grooming
791
00:40:30,428 --> 00:40:34,098
and to feel confident
and empowered
792
00:40:34,098 --> 00:40:36,018
to say something.
793
00:40:38,770 --> 00:40:42,270
- I don't really know
what's next after this either,
794
00:40:42,273 --> 00:40:44,983
but I don't feel like
I'm done yet.
795
00:40:44,984 --> 00:40:47,744
It's not really what I want
to do with my life,
796
00:40:47,737 --> 00:40:48,857
but...
797
00:40:50,657 --> 00:40:53,117
To feel fulfilled
within myself,
798
00:40:53,117 --> 00:40:56,117
like, I can't put it down.
799
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:59,210
I feel like there's still
so much more to do.
800
00:40:59,207 --> 00:41:01,667
♪ ♪
801
00:41:01,668 --> 00:41:04,338
- Hopefully,
by telling your story,
802
00:41:04,337 --> 00:41:06,547
you can inspire other girls,
803
00:41:06,547 --> 00:41:08,127
you can raise awareness,
804
00:41:08,132 --> 00:41:10,132
you can create a vocabulary.
805
00:41:10,134 --> 00:41:12,724
You might even be able
to change some laws.
806
00:41:12,720 --> 00:41:14,760
No matter how you come forward,
807
00:41:14,764 --> 00:41:20,024
it's a difficult, painful,
ugly, messy process.
808
00:41:20,019 --> 00:41:23,899
It...it stays with you
for your whole life.
809
00:41:23,898 --> 00:41:30,818
♪ ♪
56977
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