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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:05,105 --> 00:00:06,607 (tires screech) 2 00:00:08,442 --> 00:00:09,376 D'oh! 3 00:00:09,376 --> 00:00:12,246 -(tires screeching) -(grunting) 4 00:00:19,586 --> 00:00:21,588 ♪ 5 00:00:29,300 --> 00:00:33,304 I am so excited for the scout jamboree this weekend. 6 00:00:33,304 --> 00:00:36,174 Dad, hand over the family bugle! 7 00:00:36,174 --> 00:00:37,475 Here she is! 8 00:00:37,475 --> 00:00:39,477 Old Blowy. 9 00:00:39,477 --> 00:00:40,711 (blows bad note) 10 00:00:40,711 --> 00:00:43,614 -(fanfare playing) - Hmm? 11 00:00:43,614 --> 00:00:45,616 What? You're not a boy! 12 00:00:45,616 --> 00:00:47,485 You can't join the Boy Explorers! 13 00:00:47,485 --> 00:00:49,420 And that's a flugelhorn! 14 00:00:49,420 --> 00:00:51,622 Yes. It's the hardest horn. 15 00:00:51,622 --> 00:00:53,624 And, FYI, I did join. 16 00:00:53,624 --> 00:00:56,160 And I already have three badges-- 17 00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:57,528 environmentalism, 18 00:00:57,528 --> 00:00:58,596 badge-receiving, 19 00:00:58,596 --> 00:01:00,531 and sibling rivalry. 20 00:01:00,531 --> 00:01:02,200 Come on, you two... 21 00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:04,602 MALE HACKER (distorted): Attention, corporate overlords, 22 00:01:04,602 --> 00:01:06,838 we are Pseudo-nonymous, 23 00:01:06,838 --> 00:01:09,974 and we have taken over this broadcast. 24 00:01:09,974 --> 00:01:13,177 We are the anarchist collective of nameless hacktivists 25 00:01:13,177 --> 00:01:16,180 who published the internal emails of Waffle House 26 00:01:16,180 --> 00:01:20,184 and brought Home Depot's "Find a store near you" feature 27 00:01:20,184 --> 00:01:21,686 to its knees. 28 00:01:21,686 --> 00:01:25,823 FEMALE HACKER: Now we have hacked into the Disney Corporation's servers 29 00:01:25,823 --> 00:01:29,894 and seized hundreds of hours of never-before-aired footage 30 00:01:29,894 --> 00:01:32,897 from the television show The Simpsons. 31 00:01:32,897 --> 00:01:35,333 Stories so ill-conceived, 32 00:01:35,333 --> 00:01:36,834 so idiotic 33 00:01:36,834 --> 00:01:38,870 that their exposure would destroy 34 00:01:38,870 --> 00:01:42,073 the value of the very I. P. itself. 35 00:01:42,073 --> 00:01:46,244 Until we are paid a ransom of $20 million in Bitcoin, 36 00:01:46,244 --> 00:01:49,380 we will air these show-destroying scenes 37 00:01:49,380 --> 00:01:50,748 one after another, 38 00:01:50,748 --> 00:01:52,884 starting now. 39 00:01:55,453 --> 00:01:57,755 No, no, it can't be true! 40 00:01:57,755 --> 00:01:59,590 It is true, Carl. 41 00:01:59,590 --> 00:02:01,659 There never was a Lenny. 42 00:02:01,659 --> 00:02:05,296 So Lenny was just a figment of my imagination? 43 00:02:05,296 --> 00:02:06,931 I... I made him up? 44 00:02:06,931 --> 00:02:09,033 Yeah, your psyche created "Lenny" 45 00:02:09,033 --> 00:02:11,602 to help you deal with a terrible trauma there. 46 00:02:11,602 --> 00:02:15,273 - What trauma? - Finding out your previous best friend wasn't real. 47 00:02:15,273 --> 00:02:16,874 It's kind of a thing with you. 48 00:02:16,874 --> 00:02:20,211 Huh. Hey, I haven't seen you in here before. 49 00:02:20,211 --> 00:02:21,879 I'm Carl. What's your name? 50 00:02:21,879 --> 00:02:23,714 Nice to meet you, Steven. 51 00:02:23,714 --> 00:02:25,917 Aw, crap, here we go again. 52 00:02:26,751 --> 00:02:29,187 Now you see we mean business, Disney. 53 00:02:29,187 --> 00:02:33,191 You will submit $20 million in Bitcoin to our crypto wallet 54 00:02:33,191 --> 00:02:35,259 at the following address. 55 00:02:35,259 --> 00:02:36,627 Until the payment arrives, 56 00:02:36,627 --> 00:02:39,363 we will keep playing these nonsensical clips 57 00:02:39,363 --> 00:02:41,699 no one was ever meant to see. 58 00:02:44,135 --> 00:02:45,570 What's his name? 59 00:02:45,570 --> 00:02:46,804 Number Eight. 60 00:02:46,804 --> 00:02:49,173 I mean, Santa's Little Helper. 61 00:02:49,173 --> 00:02:50,641 (thunder crashes) 62 00:02:50,641 --> 00:02:53,511 Greetings, lamewads from the past! 63 00:02:53,511 --> 00:02:57,014 I have come back in time to reveal the events of the future, 64 00:02:57,014 --> 00:02:59,750 so that you can amaze the world 65 00:02:59,750 --> 00:03:03,855 with your uncannily accurate predictions! 66 00:03:03,855 --> 00:03:05,990 Less yelling, more foretelling. 67 00:03:05,990 --> 00:03:08,226 My first shocking prediction is, 68 00:03:08,226 --> 00:03:09,527 in 2016, 69 00:03:09,527 --> 00:03:13,231 the Nobel Prize in Economics will go to... 70 00:03:13,231 --> 00:03:15,233 Bengt R. Holmstr öm! 71 00:03:15,233 --> 00:03:17,668 Why would anyone care if we predicted that? 72 00:03:17,668 --> 00:03:19,036 I don't know, but they will. 73 00:03:19,036 --> 00:03:20,738 Do you have anything a little more... 74 00:03:20,738 --> 00:03:22,640 oh, impressive? 75 00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:24,242 Donald Trump is gonna be president. 76 00:03:24,242 --> 00:03:27,178 (screams) Less impressive! Less impressive! 77 00:03:27,178 --> 00:03:30,314 Okay, let's see. You're gonna want to mention gas hoarding, 78 00:03:30,314 --> 00:03:31,516 pandemics, 79 00:03:31,516 --> 00:03:34,552 Germany beats Brazil in the 2014 World Cup, 80 00:03:34,552 --> 00:03:35,753 Disney buys Fox. 81 00:03:35,753 --> 00:03:37,622 And then they both go under?! 82 00:03:37,622 --> 00:03:39,991 No, they're both absorbed by Panda Express. 83 00:03:39,991 --> 00:03:42,693 Pretty much everything now is Panda Express. 84 00:03:42,693 --> 00:03:44,128 - That makes sense. - I get it. 85 00:03:44,128 --> 00:03:46,197 Ooh! Orange chicken. 86 00:03:51,536 --> 00:03:53,471 Arr. 87 00:03:53,471 --> 00:03:55,473 Yarr. 88 00:03:55,473 --> 00:03:57,041 Aye. 89 00:03:57,041 --> 00:03:58,309 - Yarr! - Aye! 90 00:03:59,443 --> 00:04:01,078 (gulping) 91 00:04:01,078 --> 00:04:02,213 Yarr? 92 00:04:02,213 --> 00:04:03,681 (chuckles): Aye. 93 00:04:06,951 --> 00:04:08,586 Yarr! 94 00:04:08,586 --> 00:04:09,987 Aye! 95 00:04:13,057 --> 00:04:14,292 Aye? 96 00:04:14,292 --> 00:04:16,160 Yarr. 97 00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:17,295 Aye? 98 00:04:17,295 --> 00:04:18,329 Yarr! 99 00:04:19,897 --> 00:04:20,898 Aye? 100 00:04:20,898 --> 00:04:21,799 Yarr! 101 00:04:21,799 --> 00:04:24,535 - Aye! Aye! - Yarr! Yarr! 102 00:04:24,535 --> 00:04:25,870 - Aye! - Yarr! 103 00:04:27,405 --> 00:04:28,906 Aye! 104 00:04:29,607 --> 00:04:30,708 (sighs): Aye! 105 00:04:30,708 --> 00:04:32,343 (sighs): 106 00:04:32,343 --> 00:04:33,978 Yarr. 107 00:04:35,012 --> 00:04:38,716 - Yarr, yarr, yarr, yarr...! - Aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye, aye! 108 00:04:42,553 --> 00:04:45,256 Till the morrow, chums! 109 00:04:45,256 --> 00:04:46,157 (groans) 110 00:04:46,157 --> 00:04:48,759 -(children laughing) -(humming happily) 111 00:04:50,228 --> 00:04:52,029 (groans) 112 00:04:52,029 --> 00:04:53,965 WOMAN (New York accent): Is that you, babe? 113 00:04:53,965 --> 00:04:56,133 (New York accent): Yeah, yeah, I'm home. 114 00:04:56,133 --> 00:04:59,036 - Daddy! Daddy! How was school? - Hey. 115 00:04:59,036 --> 00:05:01,272 It ain't school for Daddy, sweetheart. 116 00:05:01,272 --> 00:05:02,406 It's work. 117 00:05:02,406 --> 00:05:05,643 Soul-sucking, grueling work. 118 00:05:05,643 --> 00:05:07,011 Then why don't you quit? 119 00:05:07,011 --> 00:05:09,580 Always with the quitting, this one. 120 00:05:09,580 --> 00:05:12,016 I can't do that, Doreen! 121 00:05:12,016 --> 00:05:16,521 The police department needs someone inside the school! 122 00:05:16,521 --> 00:05:18,623 So why's it got to be you? 123 00:05:18,623 --> 00:05:19,690 Look at me, Didi. 124 00:05:19,690 --> 00:05:21,692 I'm the only 36-year-old 125 00:05:21,692 --> 00:05:23,661 who can pass for ten! 126 00:05:23,661 --> 00:05:25,663 How 'bout passing for a good father? 127 00:05:25,663 --> 00:05:27,165 The kids hardly know you. 128 00:05:27,165 --> 00:05:30,334 You're out every afternoon till 3:00 p. m. 129 00:05:30,334 --> 00:05:32,270 4:00 if there's chess club. 130 00:05:32,270 --> 00:05:33,671 You think I want to be there? 131 00:05:33,671 --> 00:05:35,206 Martin likes chess! 132 00:05:35,206 --> 00:05:37,041 Not me! 133 00:05:38,009 --> 00:05:42,380 I don't know where Martin ends and my Reggie begins! 134 00:05:42,380 --> 00:05:44,615 (crying) 135 00:05:49,253 --> 00:05:51,322 Aw, maybe you're right. 136 00:05:51,322 --> 00:05:53,124 Maybe I am in too deep. 137 00:05:53,124 --> 00:05:56,494 It's just, when I was diagnosed with... this, 138 00:05:56,494 --> 00:05:58,796 I said, "I'm not gonna let it beat me. 139 00:05:58,796 --> 00:06:00,898 I'm gonna use it for good!" 140 00:06:00,898 --> 00:06:03,501 I'm doing good, aren't I? 141 00:06:03,501 --> 00:06:04,669 You are, Reg. 142 00:06:04,669 --> 00:06:07,472 You're a great role model for your kids. 143 00:06:07,472 --> 00:06:09,474 All three of 'em. 144 00:06:09,474 --> 00:06:11,275 (gasps) You mean...? 145 00:06:11,275 --> 00:06:12,577 I do. 146 00:06:13,277 --> 00:06:15,646 (distorted): They still haven't paid the ransom. 147 00:06:15,646 --> 00:06:17,982 Did they not see the nonsense we just released? 148 00:06:17,982 --> 00:06:20,151 How is Martin Prince an adult cop? 149 00:06:20,151 --> 00:06:22,386 (distorted): Well, maybe I overestimated 150 00:06:22,386 --> 00:06:24,555 how much Disney cares about Lenny. 151 00:06:24,555 --> 00:06:26,224 No, it's not your fault. 152 00:06:26,224 --> 00:06:28,860 You're the finest digital terrorist I know. 153 00:06:28,860 --> 00:06:32,563 Your malware shut down the Portland Airport for two weeks. 154 00:06:32,563 --> 00:06:35,766 (chuckles) Everyone missed Thanksgiving. 155 00:06:35,766 --> 00:06:38,035 It's sweet you remembered. 156 00:06:38,035 --> 00:06:41,506 Aw, you're sweet, too. (chuckles) 157 00:06:41,506 --> 00:06:43,141 We should probably get back to... 158 00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:45,276 (non-distorted): blackmailing the major corporation. 159 00:06:45,276 --> 00:06:48,579 Wait! Why did the voice-changing app switch off? 160 00:06:48,579 --> 00:06:51,949 (non-distorted British voice): Bollocks. I didn't upgrade to the premium edition, 161 00:06:51,949 --> 00:06:54,485 and the free trial period ran out, I'm afraid. 162 00:06:54,485 --> 00:06:56,387 I am so daft. 163 00:06:56,387 --> 00:06:57,989 Oh, my God, you're British? 164 00:06:57,989 --> 00:07:01,626 That must be delightful for your wife or girlfriend. 165 00:07:01,626 --> 00:07:03,027 Oh, no, I'm painfully single. 166 00:07:03,027 --> 00:07:05,730 Nary a romantic appointment in my "shed-you-ul." 167 00:07:05,730 --> 00:07:07,632 Say that last part again. 168 00:07:07,632 --> 00:07:09,901 You mean... "shed-you-ul"? 169 00:07:09,901 --> 00:07:12,737 (sultrily): Shed-you-ul. 170 00:07:12,737 --> 00:07:14,705 MALE HACKER: Shed-you-ul. 171 00:07:18,543 --> 00:07:20,378 -(moaning) -(masks clacking) 172 00:07:20,378 --> 00:07:21,746 Oh! We're back on! We're live! 173 00:07:21,746 --> 00:07:23,948 Well, I-I suppose we should threaten them some more. 174 00:07:23,948 --> 00:07:27,585 How about I just run another batch of show-ruining clips 175 00:07:27,585 --> 00:07:28,719 so we can... 176 00:07:28,719 --> 00:07:30,688 Topple the capitalist system 177 00:07:30,688 --> 00:07:32,290 and its bought-and-paid-for... 178 00:07:32,290 --> 00:07:35,193 Political enablers. 179 00:07:37,295 --> 00:07:38,629 (speaking French) 180 00:07:38,629 --> 00:07:39,831 (chuckles) 181 00:07:42,033 --> 00:07:44,368 OPERATOR: Do you speak English? 182 00:07:49,707 --> 00:07:52,844 We're trapped! Someone get help! 183 00:07:58,282 --> 00:08:01,285 I can't help if I can't understand you. 184 00:08:01,285 --> 00:08:03,754 Won't anyone do something?! 185 00:08:18,669 --> 00:08:21,339 (groans) Never mind. 186 00:08:23,708 --> 00:08:25,309 Let me get this straight. 187 00:08:25,309 --> 00:08:29,313 You mowed down all that corn to build a football field, 188 00:08:29,313 --> 00:08:32,483 hoping it would lure the ghosts of former players 189 00:08:32,483 --> 00:08:34,452 down from football heaven? 190 00:08:34,452 --> 00:08:36,921 Uh-huh. And look! 191 00:08:38,756 --> 00:08:41,826 Hey, I don't recognize any of these guys. 192 00:08:41,826 --> 00:08:44,562 Why are there two 50-yard lines? 193 00:08:44,562 --> 00:08:45,830 Aw, damn it! 194 00:08:45,830 --> 00:08:47,965 I built a Canadian field! 195 00:08:48,799 --> 00:08:50,234 Oh. Sorry, hoser. 196 00:08:50,234 --> 00:08:51,335 My bad, eh? 197 00:08:51,335 --> 00:08:53,771 Hey, nice rouge there, Gordo. 198 00:08:53,771 --> 00:08:55,740 Hey, Homer! Throw you a Hail Mary? 199 00:08:55,740 --> 00:08:58,042 Shut up, Flutie. 200 00:08:59,844 --> 00:09:03,314 Uh, yes. (clears throat) The day is Sol, uh, 150. 201 00:09:03,314 --> 00:09:05,449 I am stranded on Mars. 202 00:09:05,449 --> 00:09:09,587 I suspect my fellow astronauts left me behind on purpose, 203 00:09:09,587 --> 00:09:11,122 as from the bathroom 204 00:09:11,122 --> 00:09:13,324 I did hear the giggling and the shushing 205 00:09:13,324 --> 00:09:16,828 and the "Blast off quick before he's done tinkling." 206 00:09:16,828 --> 00:09:20,431 I have a mere three days of air and water remaining. 207 00:09:20,431 --> 00:09:22,867 There is no hope. 208 00:09:22,867 --> 00:09:24,869 Unless I glayvenate the hydrogen, 209 00:09:24,869 --> 00:09:26,404 flavenize the oxygen, 210 00:09:26,404 --> 00:09:29,006 and, yes, yes, poopulate the soil! 211 00:09:29,006 --> 00:09:32,043 It was a simple matter of applying pseudoscience 212 00:09:32,043 --> 00:09:35,913 and phantasmagorical engineering to the problem. Yes. 213 00:09:35,913 --> 00:09:38,983 Oh, yes, I also cloned myself for company. 214 00:09:38,983 --> 00:09:41,118 And my fellow Frinks have built us all 215 00:09:41,118 --> 00:09:42,987 an escape rocket. Isn't that wonderful? 216 00:09:42,987 --> 00:09:46,057 (clones laughing, chattering) 217 00:09:46,057 --> 00:09:47,525 Leaving! 218 00:09:47,525 --> 00:09:49,393 (gasps) 219 00:09:49,393 --> 00:09:51,696 Aw, flayvin me in the glayvin! 220 00:09:53,531 --> 00:09:54,999 Hello. This is Homer Simpson. 221 00:09:54,999 --> 00:09:57,068 From the bottom of my heart, I apologize 222 00:09:57,068 --> 00:10:00,304 to the great, great, great people of Finland 223 00:10:00,304 --> 00:10:01,339 for what I said. 224 00:10:01,339 --> 00:10:03,307 I have done many, many, 225 00:10:03,307 --> 00:10:05,443 many, many, many episodes, 226 00:10:05,443 --> 00:10:07,378 and in one of those-- just one-- 227 00:10:07,378 --> 00:10:09,013 I mixed you up with Norway. 228 00:10:09,013 --> 00:10:13,651 And I have so, so, so, so, so much love and respect for... 229 00:10:13,651 --> 00:10:15,553 I think "Finns" is what you're called. 230 00:10:15,553 --> 00:10:17,321 And if I ever-- I mean ever-- 231 00:10:17,321 --> 00:10:19,123 ever, ever, ever thought 232 00:10:19,123 --> 00:10:20,858 that an innocent slip of the tongue 233 00:10:20,858 --> 00:10:22,593 is something that an entire nation 234 00:10:22,593 --> 00:10:23,861 could get worked up about, 235 00:10:23,861 --> 00:10:26,063 I would've kept my mouth shut. 236 00:10:26,063 --> 00:10:29,967 And the scary, scary, scary, oh-so-scary lawyers 237 00:10:29,967 --> 00:10:32,303 of the giant, giant-- I mean giant-- 238 00:10:32,303 --> 00:10:35,740 so, so giant, scary corporation I work for 239 00:10:35,740 --> 00:10:38,442 would not have had to draft this statement. 240 00:10:38,442 --> 00:10:39,744 God bless you 241 00:10:39,744 --> 00:10:42,613 and all the peoples of South America, 242 00:10:42,613 --> 00:10:45,116 for you are a-- What? 243 00:10:45,116 --> 00:10:47,518 What do you mean I have to record it again? 244 00:10:47,518 --> 00:10:48,786 What did I say? 245 00:10:55,226 --> 00:10:57,595 You're chewing too loud. 246 00:10:57,595 --> 00:11:00,531 From now on, only two chews per bite. 247 00:11:00,531 --> 00:11:03,234 One, two, swallow. One, two, swallow. 248 00:11:03,234 --> 00:11:07,839 I think I've misplaced my appetite, mother. 249 00:11:09,674 --> 00:11:13,778 I need to see you right now. 250 00:11:18,649 --> 00:11:19,750 I deserve this. 251 00:11:19,750 --> 00:11:22,186 I deserve to feel like a man. 252 00:11:23,087 --> 00:11:26,824 Only with you do I truly feel alive. 253 00:11:26,824 --> 00:11:29,327 I made this just for you. 254 00:11:29,327 --> 00:11:31,662 Thank you, Mother. 255 00:11:31,662 --> 00:11:36,133 Anything for my son. I am so proud of you. 256 00:11:36,133 --> 00:11:38,836 Oh, Mommy. I can't wait another second. 257 00:11:38,836 --> 00:11:40,538 You know I need it. 258 00:11:40,538 --> 00:11:42,740 (sultry music playing) 259 00:12:00,558 --> 00:12:02,426 I almost forgot to give you this. 260 00:12:02,426 --> 00:12:04,328 Leave it on the dresser. 261 00:12:07,798 --> 00:12:10,568 If only that were my real mother. 262 00:12:10,568 --> 00:12:14,906 (groans) If only that were my real son. 263 00:12:16,707 --> 00:12:19,143 (Homer humming happily) 264 00:12:19,143 --> 00:12:21,212 I don't mean to be unneighborly, but, uh, 265 00:12:21,212 --> 00:12:24,015 you wouldn't know what happened to my old nostril skirt? 266 00:12:24,015 --> 00:12:27,852 Mustache you say? Hmm, let me think. 267 00:12:27,852 --> 00:12:31,322 Stroking this goatee I've always had. 268 00:12:31,322 --> 00:12:33,057 Stroking, stroking... 269 00:12:33,057 --> 00:12:36,727 That's it. Boys, we're Jewish now. 270 00:12:36,727 --> 00:12:39,263 - ROD: L'chaim! - TODD: To life! 271 00:12:41,632 --> 00:12:43,401 Mmm. (swallows) 272 00:12:43,401 --> 00:12:45,603 From bun to pickle, a masterpiece. 273 00:12:45,603 --> 00:12:50,074 The exquisite flavor is matched only by the peerless mouthfeel. 274 00:12:50,074 --> 00:12:51,342 Five stars. 275 00:12:51,342 --> 00:12:53,878 Bravo, Harvey Comics, bravo. 276 00:12:53,878 --> 00:12:56,347 A stunning addition to the Casper-verse. 277 00:12:56,347 --> 00:12:58,316 No notes. Ten stars. 278 00:12:58,316 --> 00:13:00,785 With this level of sour cream in your blood, 279 00:13:00,785 --> 00:13:03,821 your brain is completely starved of oxygen. 280 00:13:03,821 --> 00:13:06,057 Consequently, you're a moron. 281 00:13:06,057 --> 00:13:09,660 A perfect explanation. Succinct and devastating. 282 00:13:09,660 --> 00:13:11,429 Infinite stars! 283 00:13:11,429 --> 00:13:16,133 Best. Diagnosis. Ev-- (groaning) 284 00:13:21,372 --> 00:13:22,573 Give me a beer, pally. 285 00:13:22,573 --> 00:13:24,575 Hey, I know you, don't I? 286 00:13:24,575 --> 00:13:27,044 Nah, must be thinking of someone else, slim. 287 00:13:27,044 --> 00:13:30,381 No, I've definitely seen you around town. 288 00:13:30,381 --> 00:13:31,616 Sign here, chief. 289 00:13:31,616 --> 00:13:33,384 Here's your passport, gorgeous. 290 00:13:33,384 --> 00:13:35,319 Brake pads are shot, tough guy. 291 00:13:35,319 --> 00:13:36,687 Want that toasted, honcho? 292 00:13:36,687 --> 00:13:38,489 Found your car keys, big shot. 293 00:13:38,489 --> 00:13:39,957 Those were all you! 294 00:13:39,957 --> 00:13:41,792 I don't know what to tell you, slick. 295 00:13:41,792 --> 00:13:44,128 Just got that sort of face. 296 00:13:47,465 --> 00:13:49,233 ALL: Pally-pally-pally-pally-pally- 297 00:13:49,233 --> 00:13:54,238 pally-pally-pally-pally-pally- pally-pally-pally-pally-pally... 298 00:13:55,206 --> 00:13:57,542 (moaning, smooching) 299 00:13:57,542 --> 00:13:59,043 (exclaims) 300 00:13:59,043 --> 00:14:03,381 - Oh, my God, you're beautiful. - You're more beautiful! 301 00:14:03,381 --> 00:14:04,782 Oh. Oh, dear. 302 00:14:04,782 --> 00:14:07,952 The world has seen our exquisite symmetrical faces. 303 00:14:07,952 --> 00:14:11,255 Then they've also seen that we're... in love? 304 00:14:11,255 --> 00:14:12,456 My God. Yes. 305 00:14:12,456 --> 00:14:14,358 Yes, that's what it is, isn't it? 306 00:14:14,358 --> 00:14:16,194 It is. (stammers) It is stunning. 307 00:14:16,194 --> 00:14:19,363 As stunning as this list of abandoned episodes 308 00:14:19,363 --> 00:14:23,134 that started as clever titles and went nowhere. 309 00:14:23,935 --> 00:14:27,138 ♪ Hopin' for the dream ♪ 310 00:14:27,138 --> 00:14:28,539 ♪ Hopin' ♪ 311 00:14:28,539 --> 00:14:31,342 ♪ Focus like a laser beam ♪ 312 00:14:31,342 --> 00:14:34,512 ♪ I'll keep fighting till I want something great ♪ 313 00:14:34,512 --> 00:14:37,715 ♪ Hopin' for a dream ♪ 314 00:14:38,950 --> 00:14:43,321 ♪ Hopin' for a dream ♪ 315 00:14:43,321 --> 00:14:46,924 -♪ Hopin' ♪ -♪ To someday, somehow have a goal ♪ 316 00:14:46,924 --> 00:14:48,159 ♪ I'll keep fight... ♪ 317 00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:50,695 Are we crazy? 318 00:14:50,695 --> 00:14:53,164 Can two people, forbidden from sharing 319 00:14:53,164 --> 00:14:56,834 any personal information, really make a life together? 320 00:14:56,834 --> 00:14:58,836 I do think we owe it to each other to try, 321 00:14:58,836 --> 00:15:01,005 um... whoever you are. 322 00:15:01,005 --> 00:15:02,440 I can't wait 323 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:06,043 until we're Mr. and Mrs. Redacted. 324 00:15:06,043 --> 00:15:08,846 -(banging on door) - AGENT: FBI. 325 00:15:08,846 --> 00:15:10,381 Surrender, hacker scum! 326 00:15:10,381 --> 00:15:13,818 If we're going down, we'll take The Simpsons with us. 327 00:15:13,818 --> 00:15:17,054 - I'm gonna play the dog scene. -(exclaims) 328 00:15:21,092 --> 00:15:23,027 (upbeat voice): Good morning, Homer. 329 00:15:26,030 --> 00:15:27,365 It's morning?! 330 00:15:31,836 --> 00:15:33,871 -(banging on door) - AGENT: FBI. 331 00:15:33,871 --> 00:15:35,406 We've got you cyberterrorists surrounded. 332 00:15:35,406 --> 00:15:36,641 This is it, darling. 333 00:15:36,641 --> 00:15:38,676 I've cued up the very worst-of-the-worst clips 334 00:15:38,676 --> 00:15:39,944 to play one by one. 335 00:15:39,944 --> 00:15:42,914 When we push this button, The Simpsons dies. 336 00:15:42,914 --> 00:15:45,349 - Together, then? - Together. 337 00:15:47,185 --> 00:15:49,787 The lies... stop... now. 338 00:15:49,787 --> 00:15:51,455 - Aah! -(gasps) 339 00:15:51,455 --> 00:15:53,624 I know Eddie is Ralph's father. 340 00:15:53,624 --> 00:15:56,160 Look at the hair. Look at the hair! 341 00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:58,896 No, Clancy, I swear to you it's not true. 342 00:15:58,896 --> 00:16:02,266 My son's breath smells like cat food. 343 00:16:02,266 --> 00:16:03,801 Okay, you got me. 344 00:16:06,103 --> 00:16:08,873 (quietly): I'll have the veal. 345 00:16:09,674 --> 00:16:13,311 The lies... stop... now! 346 00:16:13,311 --> 00:16:14,745 (grunts) 347 00:16:14,745 --> 00:16:16,747 I did a DNA test. 348 00:16:16,747 --> 00:16:18,483 I'm not your son. 349 00:16:18,483 --> 00:16:20,485 Luann, how could you?! 350 00:16:20,485 --> 00:16:22,119 I'm not hers either. 351 00:16:22,119 --> 00:16:24,722 We're not your parents? 352 00:16:24,722 --> 00:16:26,224 - All right. - Oh, thank God! 353 00:16:26,224 --> 00:16:29,060 - Yes! - Oh... 354 00:16:29,861 --> 00:16:33,297 (weakly): The lies... stop... now. 355 00:16:33,297 --> 00:16:34,665 -(grunts) - Ow! 356 00:16:34,665 --> 00:16:36,801 -(groans) - Marge, 357 00:16:36,801 --> 00:16:38,703 I'm not your sister. 358 00:16:38,703 --> 00:16:40,471 I'm... your mother. 359 00:16:40,471 --> 00:16:42,406 But... but... wait, what? 360 00:16:42,406 --> 00:16:46,577 I was young and briefly hot. It was a different time. 361 00:16:46,577 --> 00:16:50,248 Back then, we solved things with huge lies. 362 00:16:50,248 --> 00:16:52,683 Then, who was my real father? 363 00:16:52,683 --> 00:16:55,786 His name was Disco... (grunts) 364 00:16:55,786 --> 00:16:58,689 Disco... (groans) 365 00:16:58,689 --> 00:17:01,325 Disco who? Disco Who? 366 00:17:02,326 --> 00:17:05,429 The lies... stop... now! 367 00:17:05,429 --> 00:17:06,597 (grunts) 368 00:17:06,597 --> 00:17:08,733 Rake-y, I'm not your real father. 369 00:17:08,733 --> 00:17:11,702 And I'm not Scottish, I'm Welsh! 370 00:17:11,702 --> 00:17:14,772 Oh, don't turn your back on me. 371 00:17:15,573 --> 00:17:17,775 ♪ 372 00:17:17,775 --> 00:17:20,211 MAN: T-minus one minute to launch. 373 00:17:20,211 --> 00:17:23,181 Ooh. (chuckling) 374 00:17:23,181 --> 00:17:24,816 All for you, baby. 375 00:17:24,816 --> 00:17:26,617 -(growling) - Aah! 376 00:17:26,617 --> 00:17:29,787 Aah! Aah! 377 00:17:29,787 --> 00:17:33,424 ♪ We are the jockeys, jockeys are we ♪ 378 00:17:33,424 --> 00:17:37,628 ♪ We live underground in a fiberglass tree. ♪ 379 00:17:37,628 --> 00:17:39,363 -(screams) - Opa! 380 00:17:40,331 --> 00:17:42,400 (Simpsons theme playing) 381 00:17:45,503 --> 00:17:46,938 (grunting) 382 00:17:46,938 --> 00:17:48,639 (screams) 383 00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:52,910 It's still me on the inside. 384 00:17:55,213 --> 00:18:00,084 Sin-ner! Sin-ner! 385 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:05,723 Oh, Homie. You're awake. 386 00:18:05,723 --> 00:18:08,025 - What happened? - You've been in a coma 387 00:18:08,025 --> 00:18:11,062 ever since you tried to jump Springfield Gorge. 388 00:18:11,062 --> 00:18:12,096 How long? 389 00:18:12,096 --> 00:18:13,931 Two days ago. 390 00:18:13,931 --> 00:18:17,335 Two days? But... I had so many adventures. 391 00:18:17,335 --> 00:18:18,936 More than 700. 392 00:18:18,936 --> 00:18:22,840 Those were all coma dreams. None of them ever happened. 393 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:25,143 (gasps) The "B" stories, too? 394 00:18:25,143 --> 00:18:26,611 (sobbing) 395 00:18:26,611 --> 00:18:29,380 I never had a pet lobster? 396 00:18:29,380 --> 00:18:31,582 I never went to space? 397 00:18:31,582 --> 00:18:34,986 What about the Halloweens?! 398 00:18:35,786 --> 00:18:37,822 Drop your code and move away from the Internet! 399 00:18:37,822 --> 00:18:39,457 You're both under arrest. 400 00:18:39,457 --> 00:18:41,826 On what charge, grand theft heart? 401 00:18:41,826 --> 00:18:43,928 Conspiracy to commit to love? 402 00:18:43,928 --> 00:18:46,964 Willfully endangering each other's loneliness? 403 00:18:46,964 --> 00:18:49,600 Take one more step and I'll blow this I. P. 404 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:51,769 to Magic Kingdom come. 405 00:18:51,769 --> 00:18:54,505 Go ahead. You've already released all the Simpsons files. 406 00:18:54,505 --> 00:18:55,706 No one cared. 407 00:18:55,706 --> 00:18:57,008 The only people still watching that show 408 00:18:57,008 --> 00:18:59,677 are football fans who passed out with the TV on. 409 00:18:59,677 --> 00:19:02,313 I am not talking about The Simpsons. 410 00:19:02,313 --> 00:19:04,549 We've hacked into all of Disney. 411 00:19:04,549 --> 00:19:07,785 That means Star Wars, Marvel, Pixar. 412 00:19:07,785 --> 00:19:09,120 We've even got... 413 00:19:09,120 --> 00:19:11,055 Nat Geo. 414 00:19:11,055 --> 00:19:12,390 You monsters. 415 00:19:12,390 --> 00:19:15,426 If I press this button, the only Hulk that exists 416 00:19:15,426 --> 00:19:17,094 will be Edward Norton. 417 00:19:17,094 --> 00:19:19,730 It'll be like Ruffalo never happened. 418 00:19:19,730 --> 00:19:21,098 You're bluffing. 419 00:19:21,098 --> 00:19:23,634 I'll delete Baby Groot, Baby Yoda, 420 00:19:23,634 --> 00:19:27,438 and their brand-new top secret character-- 421 00:19:27,438 --> 00:19:29,307 Baby Jeff Goldblum. 422 00:19:29,307 --> 00:19:32,443 On the one hand, uh, "goo," 423 00:19:32,443 --> 00:19:38,549 but I'd be remiss if I didn't also mention, uh, "gaa." 424 00:19:38,549 --> 00:19:40,251 Oh, my golly. 425 00:19:40,251 --> 00:19:42,753 It's me as a baby. 426 00:19:42,753 --> 00:19:44,755 Good God, she's not bluffing. 427 00:19:44,755 --> 00:19:46,624 Stand down. Let 'em go. 428 00:19:46,624 --> 00:19:49,827 I'll do it. 429 00:19:49,827 --> 00:19:52,463 Um... we now return you to your regularly 430 00:19:52,463 --> 00:19:54,098 "shed-you-uled" programming. 431 00:19:54,098 --> 00:19:55,166 (sighs): Oh. 432 00:19:56,033 --> 00:19:59,203 How do you lose two children?! 433 00:19:59,203 --> 00:20:02,073 What kind of jamboree are you running here? 434 00:20:02,073 --> 00:20:04,375 (both shuddering) 435 00:20:04,375 --> 00:20:05,376 (Homer and Marge gasp) 436 00:20:05,376 --> 00:20:06,944 HOMER: Yeah, you're back. 437 00:20:06,944 --> 00:20:09,847 (smooching) 438 00:20:09,847 --> 00:20:10,882 Ew. 439 00:20:10,882 --> 00:20:13,851 When we get home, can we turn on the TV 440 00:20:13,851 --> 00:20:17,922 and never, ever go outdoors again? 441 00:20:17,922 --> 00:20:20,858 - Please? - Pretty please? 442 00:20:20,858 --> 00:20:24,195 I've never been prouder of you two. 443 00:20:24,195 --> 00:20:25,563 While you were gone, 444 00:20:25,563 --> 00:20:27,031 your mom and I almost got divorced 445 00:20:27,031 --> 00:20:28,799 over something insignificant. 446 00:20:28,799 --> 00:20:31,569 Luckily, your dad apologized. 447 00:20:31,569 --> 00:20:33,604 Yup, I got it down at this point. 448 00:20:33,604 --> 00:20:35,907 It's all about the eye contact. 449 00:20:35,907 --> 00:20:38,209 MARGE: He knows what works. 450 00:20:38,209 --> 00:20:40,945 Captioning sponsored by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 451 00:20:40,945 --> 00:20:43,447 and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 452 00:20:43,447 --> 00:20:45,917 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 453 00:20:49,887 --> 00:20:51,522 (female hacker whoops, laughs) 454 00:20:51,522 --> 00:20:53,191 Maybe we didn't get the Bitcoin, 455 00:20:53,191 --> 00:20:54,859 but we've got each other. 456 00:20:54,859 --> 00:20:56,160 Oh, darling, I think we should do it, 457 00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:59,463 I think we should tell each other our real names. 458 00:20:59,463 --> 00:21:00,998 My name is Ashley. 459 00:21:00,998 --> 00:21:03,267 -(tires screeching) - No! So is mine. 460 00:21:03,267 --> 00:21:04,502 - Oh... - Ashley. 461 00:21:04,502 --> 00:21:05,736 Oh, Ashley. 462 00:21:05,736 --> 00:21:09,273 - Ashley, Ashley. - Oh, oh, British Ashley. Mmm... 463 00:21:29,393 --> 00:21:31,062 Shh! 464 00:21:31,112 --> 00:21:35,662 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 32445

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