All language subtitles for The.OC.S01E16.WEBRip.x265-ION265

[narrator]
Previously on "The O.C.."

Looks like I'm dateless tonight.

We'll be your date, right?

Yeah, right.

Hey, he seems like
a cool guy, right?

We don't really seem
to have a lot in common.

Besides your girlfriend.

- So you chose Anna?
- Kind of, yeah.

'Can we still all hang out?
Will you be cool with that?'

Sure.

All this talk about plans, about
growing up, it's a routine.

'You're not even nice
to Kirsten and she is

'the only reason
why we're putting up with you.'

- Hey!
- I'm a cop.

He tried to buy
three grams coke from me.

You must like me a little
to get me out of jail.

- That was Sandy.
- You gonna tell her?

You are.

[knock on door]

- Howdy.
- Hey.

Sorry to just pop in.

Is it okay if I come in?

Yeah, sure. Of course.

- It's just temporary.
- Hmm?

The place. It's just temporary.

My dad lost his job,
so my parents--

I don't judge.

[sighs]
I do, however, apologize.

The other night, Marissa, was..

It's okay. Really.

No. No, it's not.

I hit rock bottom.
A new low, even for me.

But it...it was eye-opening.

A call to arms.
I called my parents.

I came clean about everything.

And they were so supportive.
I talked to my sponsor.

I'm gonna start
going to meetings again.

And I totally was honest with
Natalie about all our issues.

We're getting back together.

Wow. That's amazing.

And it never would've happened

if Ryan
hadn't come to my rescue.

He called Mr. Cohen.

I mean,
busted trying to buy coke?

I should still be in jail.

Ryan helped me get a second
chance. I wanna say thanks.

Oh, so, do you want his number?

I wanna take you
and him to Palm Springs.

My family has a place there,
right on PGA West.

It'll be great. It'll be great.

We-we can bring
all your friends.

Seth, Anna, Summer, even Luke.

You can meet my folks,
meet Natalie.

- Palm Springs?
- Oh, it's so much fun.

The weather there is perfect.

- Do you golf?
- No. Not really.

I'll teach you. Ryan too.

Well, I do really
wanna meet Natalie.

Oh, she's dying to meet
both of you guys.

A little getaway.
Just the gang. On me.

- 'It's the least I can do.'
- It sounds amazing.

You know, let me
just call Ryan and ask him.

[theme song]

♪ California here we come ♪

♪ Right back
where we started from ♪

♪ California ♪♪ California ♪

♪ Here we come ♪

♪ California ♪

♪ California ♪

♪ Here we come ♪♪

[Sandy]
'Alright, knees bent.
Not quite that much.'

'That's it. Back straight,
eyes right over the ball.'

'Feet a little closer together.'

'Just off your left foot.
There you go.'

'Not quite that close together,
but that's okay.'

'Alright, just let it
hang like a pendulum.'

Nice and easy.

Nice and easy. Keep breathing.

Nice and easy.

Nice..

I'll stop. I'll-I'll,
I'll just go right over here.

I got it.

- Alright, one more.
- No. No more.

Oh, come on, you were so good
at the driving range.

- I don't play golf.
- 'Not true, buddy.'

- You just don't play well.
- And, you know..

There's plenty more to do
in Palm Springs than play golf.

- You can spa.
- You know, I don't spa.

You don't play golf,
you don't spa.

- What do you do?
- Yes, Ryan.

What exactly do you do, besides
musicals and punching people?

Well, he's very good
with the ladies.

Ah, the ladies.

He's very good with the ladies.

Very good with the ladies.

He's standing right here
holding a golf club.

Yeah, but you don't know
how to use it.

Right, which is why
I'm not going to Palm Springs.

Hey. Yes, you are going
to Palm Springs, okay?

'Listen to me. You did
something nice for Oliver.'

Now he wants to repay you

by taking us
to his mansion in Palm Springs.

Without you, there is no deal.
Why can't you understand that?

This kid, Oliver,
has a mansion on a golf course?

Yeah, he's also got
a ski chalet in Mammoth.

Wow, I guess sometimes
it's good to be Oliver.

Sometimes it's great
to be Oliver.

But you or I don't care about
those sort of things, do we?

Or Marissa.
I don't think she cares either.

- You think?
- 'I don't know.'

But even if she's
a little bit impressed

look over there, huh?

Who's got himself a pool house?

With ocean views. Here, come on,
take another shot.

Nice and easy.

So...Oliver's parents
are gonna be there?

- Yeah.
- Have you met them?

No, but if they're anywhere
near as cool as Oliver..

[glass shatters]

I don't do nice and easy.

- Do we trust this Oliver kid?
- No. Not at all.

But we trust our guys,
and his parents

are supposed to be there.

- And Seth knows to call hourly?
- Yeah, and..

We're just gonna
worry all weekend.

They're golfing.

Yeah, when we gonna
get you on the golf course?

Not today.

Do you know
who's coming home today?

Oh, God, the ugly Americans
are coming back.

So, when is your father
and Julie getting in?

They arrive from Paris
this afternoon.

After having confirmed
all of Europe's

worst suspicions about
Americans, I'm guessing.

Yeah, well, I'm guessing that

this means that
Hailey will be on the way out.

What's she gonna do,
she's gonna hit your father up

for a blank check
and then take off?

Was there ever any doubt?

I mean, last time
she was gone for two years.

This time
it could be three and..

Oh, who knows what kind of
trouble she can get into.

- Morning.
- 'Oh, hey, Hailey.'

Can I get you anything?

I got those pumpkin muffins.

'And there's coffee and there's'

'orange juice without pulp.'

- Dad comes back today, huh?
- Right. Yes, he does.

So, what time
will we be seeing him?

Dinner. 7:00.

Oh, I'm sorry,
I'll have to miss that.

Julie Cooper's not coming,
is she?

I can't believe dad's with her.

She's only with him
for his money.

And that is such
an unattractive quality.

- Um, pumpkin muffin?
- Yes, darling?

- I think it'll be fun.
- You do?

I mean, what could be
more fun than

joining you guys
for Couple Fest 2004?

You and Ryan, Oliver and Natalie

Anna and What's-His-Face Cohen.

Me and Luke.
God, it should be all-time.

It won't be like that,
it'll give us all a chance

to get out of town,
hang out, it will be fun.

What's more fun than watching
some nerdy neurotic

bat his eyelashes
at his trippy pixie chick?

So clearly you're okay with
being just friends with Seth.

- Uh, clearly.
- I was being sarcastic.

So was I.

Which we never were
before Cohen showed up

and taught us all irony.

- Jackass.
- Hey, Summ.

Look, if it's too hard to be
around him, then, then why go?

Why do this to yourself?

Because, Coop, I told them
that I was fine with it.

I told them that I was cool
just being their friend.

I have a reputation.

And I can't sabotage
the trip if I am not there.

- Summer.
- Okay.

What do you think
about laxatives

in his coffee, huh?

- Um--
- No. Okay!

Dead frog in his X-Men underoos?

That's good. No.

No. I've got it.

While he's sleeping,
I slip his hand in warm water.

It totally makes you
pee your bed.

And then Anna wakes up,
sees he's a bed wetter

and that is awesome!
That is just...awesome.

Mm-hmm.

- I've lost my mind, haven't I?
- Yeah, little bit.

And over Seth Cohen.

Jimmy.
Hey, I'm glad I ran into you.

We're still on for dinner
tonight, right?

Uh, dinner? Yeah.

You okay?

No, I'm not really.

I just, I just,
I just got turned down

for a manager's position
in this place.

Apparently, that kid
is better suited

to the rigors
of the job than I am.

Maybe we should reschedule.
I'm not feeling very social.

We can't reschedule.

The Lighthouse closes down
tonight forever.

It's the last chance to get

the best chicken parmigiana
in the business.

First, The Lighthouse
leaves Newport and then me.

How, how poetic.

What do you mean you're leaving?

Uh, there's nothing here for me.

There's no opportunities,
there's no second chances.

I got a brother in Phoenix.

He called me, uh,
this week and..

- You can't leave.
- Well, I-I can't stay.

Look, I'm just
on my way to work.

I know we have
positions available.

No, Sandy, you can't.
N-n-no. You've done..

It'll be nothing glamorous,
just entry level kinda thing.

Paralegal work, file clerk
and that sort of thing.

Thanks. I mean, whatever it is.

I.. Just as long as I can,
I can stay with Marissa.

I mean, I-I can't afford

to support the both of us
much longer.

- We'll figure it out.
- Thanks.

You can't bail
on me tonight, because

I'll be stuck
with Hailey and Caleb.

I mean, it's,
it's the least you can do.

- Yeah. Thank you.
- Alright.

- Hey.
- Hi.

Alright!

And so it begins.

Guess I'm just gonna
have to get used to this.

Seth's in his room.

It's upstairs
to the left, right?

I'm just gonna
make sure he's packed

so he doesn't hold us up.

You know, we need
to be nice to Summer.

'Cause she's afraid
this weekend is just gonna be

a bunch of couples doing, like

you know, couple-y stuff.

- And it's not?
- Mm-mm.

So we'll be hanging out with,
uh, say, Oliver?

Oliver and Natalie.
They made up.

Why, you don't have a problem
with Oliver, do you?

No. I mean,
a guy shows up out of nowhere

and suddenly he's hanging
around all the time.

Yeah, a guy shows up
out of the blue

knows no one,
abandoned by his family.

Sound familiar?

- A little bit.
- Look.

You did something nice for him

and now he wants to repay you.

- By playing golf?
- Yeah. Well, it'll be fun.

You've never seen me play golf.

Then I guess
it'll be especially fun for me.

- Ah..
- Mm-hmm.

I love Palm Springs.

A little golf, a little shvitz.

I don't know,
it all sounds kind of old.

Yes, Anna, it does sound old.

And somewhere inside me
there's an old Jewish man

who's very excited.

That came out
a little disgusting.

- Yeah, kind of.
- But, seriously..

There's the geriatric part of me

that actually loves
a good early-bird special.

A little bit
of shuffleboard, some mahjong.

Well, when you put it that way..

Seriously, think about it.

Most old people are too
actually old to enjoy being old.

- Oh.
- Not me, though.

I'm ready to retire right now
to a life of leisure.

Palm Springs is my Mecca.

Well, what I'm
looking forward to is

a weekend alone
without our parents.

Oh, I see where
you're going with this.

We can have dinner
as early as we want.

It'll be a couples' weekend.
We can have our own room.

- Be still, my pacemaker.
- You dirty old man.

Hey, if the orthopedic
shoe fits..

Hello, friends.
Are you guys almost ready to go?

- Yeah, totally, we're there.
- Hey, Summer.

Well, that is just great,
you guys.

Oh, sorry.

God, Anna, it looked like
you were doing so well too.

- Don't worry about it.
- Thanks for being so forgiving.

[Summer]
'We are gonna have
so much fun this weekend.'

All of us hanging out..

...as friends.

Did you rob
a liquor store, Luke?

Cohen, you can't play golf
without a buzz on.

Hey. Good tip, Bagger Vance.

A blender. Nice thinking, Cohen.

Yeah, no. It's actually
a humidifier. I get nose bleeds.

- How romantic.
- I think it's sweet.

It'll make our room
like a tropical paradise.

- Yes, it will.
- Oh, you know.

It is so nice how you find

all of Cohen's weaknesses
so adorable.

I'm not weak, okay?
I'm just delicate.

Well, looks like you and I are
the only ones without anyone.

Okay, I'm-I'm just gonna
lie down in the driveway.

Just back your truck
right up over me.

- What's up, guys?
- Hey.

What's the matter?

It's Natalie. It's over.

I don't know. I'm sorry.
Maybe we shouldn't go.

Yeah, maybe we shouldn't.

- What happened?
- I don't wanna talk about it.

No, you need to.

And you know what,
we need to get out of town.

I mean, maybe we could talk
about it on the ride down, or..

Well, is that okay?
If I ride with Oliver?

Or maybe
we could all go together?

No, no, you-you guys go.
I'll see you down there.

Hey, Chino!
Why don't you ride with me?

- Can I ride with you guys?
- Uh, yeah, sure.

- Shotgun.
- Okay.

Thanks for understanding.

[rock music]

Dad. Julie. Uh, you're early.

Bonjour,Kiki.

- Cheese wheel? It's Brie.
- Oh, thanks.

- How was France?
- Aside from the French..

Where's Hailey?

Uh, she's showering, I-I think.

I-I wasn't
expecting you guys so soon.

Oh, he couldn't wait
to see his precious Hailey.

Couldn't even let me
go home and take a shower.

How is she?
How's she looking? Too thin?

Oh, she looks good.
Her spirits are high.

- She's high?
- No, her spirits.

- Her mood. She's up.
- So she's on uppers?

- No, she seems balanced.
- You changed your hair.

Oui!Do you like it?
Isn't it France?

- Cal says he doesn't like it.
- Hey, dad.

Hailey.

- It's great to see you.
- 'Mm.'

- Julie. Your hair.
- Hailey. You're here.

I haven't seen you since..

'How long has it been?'

Urgh, dad, are you gonna
start with me already?

Fair enough. Just tell me
what you been up to.

- All your adventures.
- Cal, uh..

I thought we could
swing by the house maybe--

Kiki, could you make us
some lunch? I'm starved.

So, tell me about Costa Rica.

How about lunch? We have Brie.

[Tom Jones singing
"It's Not Unusual"]

♪ It's not unusual
to be loved by anyone ♪

♪ It's not unusual
to have fun with anyone.. ♪♪

- Brought enough beer?
- Oh, you never know, buddy.

[Luke]
'You never know.'

- Hey. You made it.
- Yeah.

We tried following you,
but it was hard to keep up.

Sorry. I guess
I got all wrapped up in my saga.

I got a little distracted.

This-this place is awesome.
Where's the fridge?

I-I don't want
these to get skunked.

Yeah, I'll show you the kitchen.

Think you brought
enough beer, man?

[Luke]
'Everybody keeps saying that.'

- How was it?
- It was okay. We talked.

He talked mostly. I think he
just wanted someone to listen.

How's he?

He's a little fragile.

But, hey, I think
getting out of town will help.

Hope you guys weren't talking
about me when I was gone.

Sorry for taking
your girlfriend away from you.

But don't worry,
she's all yours.

- I wasn't worried.
- Right.

Okay.

I was trying to give you
some culture, Cohen.

Well, the audio version
of "The Da Vinci Code"

is not culture.

- Yeah, well, it's a true story.
- Hey.

[cell phone ringing]
God!

Hey, dad. How are you doing?

Wow. Six calls in,
um, two hours.

That's a new record.
Yeah. No. We..

We're still fine,
believe it or not. Okay.

'Okay, what I can do, then, is
call you from every hole. Cool?'

Okay, great. Bye.

Where are your folks?

Yeah, their plane
got delayed in Zurich.

I don't think they're gonna
make it this weekend, but

welcome to their humble abode.

Thanks, man.

Now let's get everyone settled

before we hit the links, huh?

I set up two tee times.

I figured Seth, Summer and Anna

could be our threesome.

Let me show
everyone to their room.

And the last but not the least..

Oh, I forgot this is the room
with the two twins.

Uh, do you want to switch rooms?
Or we could push them together?

Oh, no, this is fine.
It's great.

- I'm just gonna go change.
- Okay.

I'll help you with the beds.

Hopefully it won't be
too uncomfortable.

Alright, thanks.

I really appreciate
you being so cool

about Marissa and I
being friends.

Well, yeah, no problem.

I mean, with everything you
two just went through with Luke

the last thing you need
is another guy not to trust.

- With Luke?
- Yeah.

You thinking that maybe
he and Marissa

'were getting back together.'

That was a while ago.

I'm not judging. I mean, if
anyone should have trust issues.

- What does that mean?
- 'Just your background.'

Marissa was filling me in
on some of the details

on our ride down.

- She was?
- Yeah.

But, I mean, just in terms of

how amazing it is
that you're so healthy.

Well adjusted. Considering..

Considering?

- So how do I look?
- Perfect.

Yeah, great.

Sandy Cohen
working on a Saturday.

Tom Wellington, how are you?
Playing catch-up, huh?

I'm trying to buy some time
away from the wife and kids.

Oh, how touching. Listen,
I got a question for you.

I know Celeste in Records
is going on maternity leave

and we haven't found anyone yet.

- You know Jimmy Cooper, right?
- Jimmy Cooper?

- Yeah.
- Are you out of your mind?

Sandy, this is one of the most
reputable firms in the county.

What's it gonna do
for our profile

to hire the most
notorious criminal?

Tom, there's no such thing

as bad publicity.

Before he went down, there was
no one better than Jimmy.

No one smarter.
Everyone in this town loved him.

Yeah. Till he ripped them off.

He made a mistake
and he's paying it off.

He doesn't deserve
a second chance?

Not in our firm.
Not in this lifetime.

Look, the best thing
you can do around Jimmy Cooper?

Stand upwind. Don't get
his stink all over you.

- Oh, he's a good guy, Tom.
- Yeah?

Well, then, why don't you
go into business with him?

[Kirsten]
'She so looks like mom,
it's scary.'

He takes one look at Hailey
and he can't say no.

And right now,
she's telling him of her plan

to help the indigent population
of some depressed country.

And all she's looking for
is some all-expense-paid bender

to Amsterdam or Thailand.

It's amazing he can't see it.

She's only being nice
to him for his money.

Every time she vanishes

it's for a little while longer.

The trips get wilder and wilder.

One of these days,
I don't think she's coming back.

You know you're the only one
he listens to, Kirsten.

If you're really scared
she's gonna disappear again

you need to stop him
from letting her.

[indistinct chattering]

- How's this?
- Pretty good.

You just, uh, gotta get your
hips into it a little more.

You know, you gotta go..

I think she's got the idea.

Rock and fire.

For a beautiful girl,
that is one ugly swing.

Got to follow that, huh?

Wow.

Don't suppose you were using
creative visualization?

My face as the golf ball?

Can't wait to see
your short game, buddy.

I think your ball's
in the trees.

That's bad, right?

Thanks for carrying
my golf bag, Cohen.

I really think
I threw out my back.

If your back hurts, Summer,
why don't we take a golf cart?

What? Are you, like,
against nature?

This isn't nature.

- This is a golf course.
- I think I have a hernia.

You guys, this way
we can spend more time

together as friends.

How come when she says friends

it sounds like a threat?

It's her inflection.

What? We did say
we'd try and be friends, right?

I mean, who's she gonna
talk to, Luke?

The guy only recently
learned how to walk upright.

Uh-oh. Oh!

Uh, Cohen!

Could you help me find my ball?

Anna, stay back.
There might be poison ivy.

Um, Summer,
I don't wanna get poison ivy.

Cohen, I thought
you were my friend.

- Okay.
- Wow.

Looks like Summer's not the only
one who lost their balls.

Oh! Too bad.

I could hurt that guy.

So could I.

Am I trying too hard with him?
All I want is to be friends.

I just feel like he hates me.

No. I mean, he likes you.

- He just..
- Right. Right, trust issues.

- Can't win them all, I guess.
- Hey, nobody's looking.

Oh, nice shot, buddy!

Okay. I think we've torn up
the course long enough.

Last guy back
buys the first round.

Come on.

♪ Yeah ♪

Go on! Bring it.

♪ Lies ♪

♪ Look at me now just ♪

Come on, they're gaining on us.
Oh, God!

♪ And I think
you found someone else ♪

♪ Now I'm gonna have to find
a way to put the bottle down ♪

[yelling]

You better run!

♪ That I'm drowning
in a pool of misery ♪

Yipikaye!

♪ I'm always afraid
that you're gone ♪

♪ Away from me ♪

♪ I'm always afraid
that you're.. ♪♪

Look out! Look out! Ryan, Ryan,
Ryan, hold, stop, stop, stop!

Dude, nice driving.
You made that thing dance.

What the hell
is your problem, man?

Hey, man..

I thought, I thought
we were just joking.

Yeah. Good joke. Come down here,
tell me another one.

Oh, sorry, man.

See you back at the house, okay?

Are you okay?

You know, he was just playing.

Fine.

That guy was not playing.

- Hey.
- You look nice.

Hey, you look like you're not
having dinner with your father.

Oh, I'm gonna give them
a little one-on-one time.

It's not a dinner
that I want to be at.

Oh, I feel the same way
about my meal.

Jimmy's right. He is done here.

His best shot is
starting over somewhere else.

So we'll have a, a nice meal

and a couple of drinks
and talk about his next move.

Alcohol? Yes. Inspired.

How do you think
I got you to marry me?

So you were drunk.
Explains everything, Kiki.

- Caleb..
- Hey, dad.

It is always such a pleasure.

You two have the time
of your lives, huh.

- You're not dressed.
- I'm not going.

We both know why Hailey's here.

She wants to catch up
with her family.

Dad, you honestly
don't believe that.

Don't be jealous
of your baby sister.

I love both
my daughters equally.

'You don't, but that's okay.'

What's not okay is the fact that

she wants to take advantage
of how much you love her.

- You want me to cut her off?
- I know you do too.

Oh, dinner at 6:00,
in bed by 8:00.

Anna, my old Jewish man
is very happy right now.

It's pretty humid, Seth.
I think you could stop futzing.

No. No, I can't.
Futzing's what I do, my darling.

Besides, I almost have it.

And there we go.
She's purring like a kitten.

[purring]

So, Cohen.

You and me, alone in a bed.

Polyfill, it's not
as comfortable as down

but it's good for our little
allergies, our sniffles.

And this bed, huh?

It's posturepedic for my back.

And your back.

- Yes?
- My catheter fell out.

Hey, guys.

- Hey.
- Uh..

Luke's hogging the remote
and it's either

football or porn.

So I was wondering if I could
watch TV with you guys?

We're not watching TV, Summer.

Yeah, Summer, we were
about to go to bed actually.

But it's 8 o'clock.
What are you, like, 70?

On the inside, yes.

Well, I thought
this was a weekend

where we could
hang out as friends.

- It is.
- Totally, totally.

Oh, I get it.

It's, like,
specific friend hours, right?

Whatever works for you?

'A friend on-off switch.
A friend appointment book.'

I mean, do I have to schedule
friend time in advance?

- No, that is not it at all.
- It's not it.

Great. You guys. That's great.

[music on TV]

Ooh, that Enrique is so hot.

I mean, can you imagine being
with a guy with abs like that?

Huh. Yeah, apparently not.

You don't have to do that.

I don't mind.

Well, then,
at least let me help?

Where's Marissa?

Getting changed for the hot tub.

You going in?

Right.

Can we, can we just start over?

Start over?

Yeah, I feel like
we got off on the wrong foot.

And I wanna make this right.

Get this thing straight,
so we can be friends.

What can I do?

Next time you wanna be
alone with my girlfriend

let me know,
so I can stay home.

This always happens.

Natalie. My friends at Pacific.
And now you.

I'm so stupid!

- Take it easy.
- Damn it!

Everybody who knows me
for more than

five minutes,
ends up hating my guts.

That's not true. Nobody,
nobody hates your guts. Okay.

- What's going on?
- We were, we were talking.

- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm..

I'm gonna go get some
fresh air and..

I'm gonna go get
some stuff for breakfast.

- I'll go with you.
- No, just..

Just stay with Ryan.
I'll be back soon. Just..

Just leave the kitchen, man.
Everything's okay.

You actually managed to drive
him out of his own house?

I don't know what happened,
we were talking

and he, he, he just went off.

What were you talking about
that was so upsetting?

- You.
- Me?

You and him.

Okay. You know what?
Oliver's got a lot of problems.

But I think
you're the one who's paranoid.

- What's your problem?
- I don't know.

Maybe that you spent
the entire car ride

telling him everything about me.

I wasn't.
I was talking about my life.

And you're part of my life.
You know what?

I don't understand
what's going on with you.

There's gotta be more I can do,
there's gotta be somebody--

Sandy, you've done
everything you possibly can.

- No, no.
- You know what? You're right.

It's, it's, it'd be,
it-it's be for the best.

Like you said, I can start over,
have a new life.

I never really wanted to be
a financial planner. Or a thief.

Okay, so figure out right now.
What is it you really wanna do?

What I really wanna do
is not be 40 years old

divorced, with two kids
and trying to figure out

what I really want to do.

What is it
you used to want to be?

A pilot. You know, I always
liked stewardesses. You?

I always knew exactly
what I wanted to be

I wanted to be left fielder
for the New York Yankees.

In fact, it was actually
the pursuit of that dream

that carried me all the way
through law school.

The most enjoyable job
I ever had, actually

was, um, working here.

Yeah, I managed this place

the summer I married Julie.

And look at it now.
It's closing.

I mean,
John Wayne used to come here.

- Gary Cooper.
- Yeah.

This is the real deal, you know.

This, this, this
is the last bit of old Newport.

Look at it, all it really needs
is just a little facelift.

The land value alone
would be enough

to secure
a decent renovation loan.

You know, you, you update
the menu a little bit

you, you bring back happy hour,
it'd be, it'd be a..

- It would be fun.
- It would be blast.

The kids would come in.
It'd be fantastic.

Oh, yeah, man, a lot more fun
than-than, you know

whatever high-priced
nuisance lawsuit

I got waiting for me
back at my desk.

A lot more fun than moving
to Phoenix without my kids.

What?

Katie!

Two more martinis, please.

Ooh, Egg McMuffins.

- Sounds so good right now.
- I know.

Why can't they
serve those all day?

I know. Totally.

Like, what technological
innovation is preventing that?

Okay, they can put a man
on the moon, correct?

And they can't serve
an Egg McMuffin past 10:30 a.m.

Can't figure it out.
It doesn't make sense.

Cabbage Patch Kids.

- They still sell those?
- Oh, weird..

I don't really get the whole

like, legend
of the cabbage patch.

- It freaks me out.
- What?

Babies harvested
from the heads of cabbage?

- Yeah. Exactly.
- What's so freaky about that?

- '...child-slavery ring.'
- 'It's weird.'

[Seth]
'It's disgusting.
It makes me want to vomit.'

- "Smurfs," dude.
- Aww!

Do you know how tall they were?

- What?
- Three apples.

- 'Really? That's big.'
- 'Three apples.'

There should be
a channel on television

'I think, of us
watching television.'

- We're that good.
- Yeah.

Yeah, you are.
You're so that good.

Your whole witty-banter thing
is so cute, you guys.

You guys are
like brother and sister.

Yeah, you guys
could totally be related.

I'm gonna go to bed.

I'm going to bed too.

Hey.

- He's not back yet?
- No.

And he still hasn't called.

I'm really worried.
It's been two hours.

What's wrong with him, exactly?

He's been battling
depression for a while.

And he's had some
substance abuse problems.

I'm sorry.

I just hope he's okay.

[cell phone ringing]

It's him.

- Hey.
- Marissa.

You know, something happened.

What's wrong? What is it?

- I messed up real bad.
- Where are you?

- 'What did you do?'
- I just drove back to Newport.

And took a whole bunch of pills.

- Whole bunch.
- Okay.

- Call an ambulance.
- No, no. No doctors.

- Please. Just..
- I'm so scared right now.

Maybe, uh, maybe
I could throw them up.

Well, do that. Just get them
out of your system.

I'll try..

...but, uh..

Do you think you could,
um, come back?

I'm sorry, but I am s-so scared.

Okay, we're leaving right now.
See you soon.

- He's not okay.
- He just took a bunch of pills.

- He's not picking up.
- It's okay.

You just talked to him.

That was 20 minutes ago.

Hi. Marissa Cooper
for Oliver Trask, please.

♪ It's not unusual
to be loved by anyone ♪

[cell phone ringing]

♪ It's not unusual
to have fun with any one.. ♪

I thought you said he was okay.

He said he was.

'He said he spent
the last hour in the bathroom'

getting the pills
out of his system.

But if that's true..

- What?
- Why isn't he picking up?

♪ It's not unusual
to see me cry ♪

♪ Oh I wanna die ♪

[ringing continues]

♪ It's not unusual
to go out at any time ♪

♪ But when I see you out
and about it's such a crime ♪

♪ if you should ever
want to be loved by anyone ♪

♪ It's not unusual
it happens every day ♪

♪ No matter what you say.. ♪♪

[ringing continues]

What the hell
did you say to dad?

'I know you're behind this.'

Hailey, we had a conversation
and we both agreed--

How convenient that
the one thing you two

agree on
is how to screw me over.

Oh, Hailey,
you don't have to do this.

I thought this is
what you wanted.

'Me on my own,
not taking dad's money.'

Not taking up
room in your house.

I never said
that you couldn't stay.

No, you said you wanted me
to live my own life.

Be on my own, be independent.

And then you went behind my back

and sabotaged
my relationship with dad.

What relationship with dad?

You take his money
and then you take off.

My relationship with dad
is between me and dad.

Was between me and dad.

I just don't wanna see you
get into any more trouble.

Well, now you won't have to.

[car honks]

There's my cab.

Oh, Hailey,
where are you gonna go?

You don't have any money.

Yeah, well, whose fault is that?
I'll find another way to get by.

You could stay here
and work for dad.

Why?

So I can be
as independent as you are?

Living off his money
in the McMansion he built you?

I'm sorry, but you were right.

I need to have my own life.

And the only way
that I can do that

is to get as far away from dad

and as far away
from you as I can.

I'll see you.

[crying]
Oliver. Open up, please.

It's me.

- We have to call security.
- I'll go.

Oliver. Oh, my God. You're okay.

Yeah, kind of.

- You alright, man?
- Yeah. A little embarrassed.

When you didn't
pick up the phone, I..

I was in the shower.
Sorry about that.

I got kind of messed up,
but I'm good now.

Yeah.

You guys should go, enjoy
what's left of your weekend.

What are you talking about?
We're not going anywhere.

So, what did you take exactly?

I don't know.

A bunch of sleeping pills,
some painkillers.

Well, how many?

I don't remember. But I got them
all out of my system, I promise.

Well, did you drink any water?

'Cause you're
probably dehydrated.

You know,
we should call room service.

You want any ginger ale
or Gatorade?

Maybe we should take him
to the emergency room.

I mean, he swallowed
all those pills.

If they were in my system,
I'd have felt them by now.

Yeah, but, I mean,
why take any chances?

I mean, we can take you now.

The thing is, if we go
to the emergency room

they'll put me under
the suicide watch for 72 hours.

They'll call the cops

and then they'll call
my parents in Zurich.

I mean,
the truth is that I'm fine.

Really, I just want
to just crawl into my bed

and forget this day
ever happened.

- Sandy.
- Hey, you're awake.

Oh, shoot! Ow!

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Are you drunk?

- Don't worry, I took a cab.
- Yeah, so did Hailey.

Dad cut her off
and she cut me off.

Oh, I'm sorry.

So how was your night?

That good, huh?

You know, I'm not sure, but..

...I think Jimmy Cooper
and I might have

gone into business
together tonight.

Really? And what kind
of business is that?

- The restaurant business.
- Oh, you are drunk.

Oh, in an adorable way, I think.

Yeah? Oui?

- No?
- And what about the firm?

- Patrick savaging con?
- They'll have my body.

And so will you, by the way.

But the restaurant will have
my soul and my income.

- And my savings.
- How can you do that?

Look, I'm making more money
than I ever made in my life

and I'm having way less fun.

I used to help people for
a living, you remember that.

I'll tell you,
your buddy Jimmy Cooper

man, oh, he needs some help.

Oh, man,
if he doesn't get a job

he's gonna have to leave town.

And I,
I don't want him to leave town.

Well, you know,
it's been a long time

since I've had
a friend in Newport.

I don't wanna have to find
another friend in Newport.

Am I crazy?

Oh, I'm crazy.

You have to be crazy to be
in the restaurant business.

But I think it's great
that you wanna help Jimmy.

Well, you know..

And be friends after all this
time, it means a lot to me.

Oh, well. Okay.

Sandy?

[whispers]
Aw..

They're sleeping.

Hey, we're home.

Thanks for the ride, buddy.
Great weekend, huh?

- Bye, Summer.
- Bye.

[Seth]
'See you guys.
Have fun. Drive safely.'

So you're into Cohen, huh?

It must be kind of weird
to see him with somebody else.

It was for me anyway,
with Marissa.

Whatevs.

I'm over it. Moving on.

Ready for my next victim.

Well, just for the record

whoever he turns out to be,
he's a lucky dude.

You're looking pretty hot
these days, Summer.

Real hot.

Thanks.

Oh, my God! Eww!

Oh, God, I'm sorry, Luke.
You're..

You're cute and everything,
but there's just no way.

No worries.

What are you doing?
What are you looking for?

Nothing. Is he gonna be alright?

Uh, yeah. I think so.

But I told him
I'd stay with him tonight.

- What?
- Well, I can't leave him alone.

What if he tries it again?

- If he tried it the first time.
- What?

What if he didn't try
to kill himself tonight?

What are you talking about?

He wouldn't let us
take him to the hospital.

Well, maybe that's because
he didn't want his parents

shipping him off
to an institution.

Yeah, maybe he belongs there.

I mean,
what kind of person does this?

- No, not, I, I didn't mean..
- You should go.

You weren't trying
to kill yourself.

Yeah, well,
maybe Oliver wasn't either.

But he's my friend, and I can't
just leave him alone tonight.

So, you know what, just go home
and I'll see you in the morning.

Sorry to interrupt. Um..

I just wanna say thanks, Ryan.
For everything, man.

'Sorry for
ruining your weekend.'

Goodnight.

I'll call you tomorrow.

♪ Think about somebody else ♪

♪ How could you let them ♪

♪ Take you away from me ♪

♪ There's somebody else ♪

♪ There's somebody else ♪♪

[instrumental music]