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Previously on Call Me Kat...
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I had no idea you were coming back.
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Obviously you ate well.
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This is a juice bar now.
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Where are the cats?
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I told you she'd notice.
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Now I'm at peace.
I just go with the flow.
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I even got a tattoo. It's in Sanskrit.
It says "acceptance."
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That says "garden salad."
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You sold a song?
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Aw, please, it's not that big a deal.
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- Just to Kacey.
- Kacey...
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00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:29,529
Musgraves. Just a famous person,
who I know.
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00:00:29,530 --> 00:00:31,229
I didn't fire Randi.
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She left because I didn't love
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00:00:32,832 --> 00:00:35,318
every single thing
that she did to my café.
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00:00:35,343 --> 00:00:36,551
I want you to be my partner.
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- Like 50-50?
- Ish.
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00:00:39,222 --> 00:00:41,924
I've been making my mother
margaritas since I was nine.
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00:00:49,391 --> 00:00:50,915
I don't care for them.
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- What?
- Your new glasses.
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I assumed you were going to
ask me eventually.
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I wasn't... for this exact reason.
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Will you take them off
when we get to the club?
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My friends will be there.
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00:01:04,121 --> 00:01:07,336
Well, if anyone says anything,
you can just pretend not to know me.
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00:01:07,337 --> 00:01:08,766
Wouldn't be the first time.
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Tell the truth, you're
wearing them to spite me.
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No, the truth is I need them to see.
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That it upsets you is a welcome bonus.
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Where'd you get them,
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lost and found at the morgue?
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Hey!
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Oh, relax. It was a joke.
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Frankly, it's funnier that
you paid money for them.
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You just ran a stop sign.
Did you not see the big, red octagon?
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Don't be such a square.
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Geometry? I thought you'd appreciate it,
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given you were the only member
of your high school math club.
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Hey, one is still a number.
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The loneliest.
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Oh, great.
Now we're getting pulled over.
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I get it, Katharine, you can see
through your hideous glasses.
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What are you doing?
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Getting out of this ticket.
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Seriously, you're gonna flirt
with a motorcycle cop?
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Well, I'll start with flirting,
see where it goes.
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Okay, I'm gonna record this
because this is exactly
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the kind of thing that
my therapist does not believe.
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Oh, crap, it's a woman.
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- Katharine, unbutton your shirt.
- What?
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Maybe she's gay.
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I'm not gay.
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All right.
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Do you hear that, Dr. Bell?
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Do you hear that?!
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- Synced and corrected by synk -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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You're making a fuss over nothing.
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You just got a ticket,
your license is expired,
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and you told that officer
I'm an adventurous lover.
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Why didn't you just get it renewed?
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I didn't want them to change my photo.
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That was a hair day for the ages.
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Well, now, you're gonna have to
go to the DMV
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and take the driving test again.
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Can't you take it for me?
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We look about the same age.
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No.
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Although I do love me
some standardized tests.
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00:03:02,220 --> 00:03:04,479
I used to give them
to myself in math club.
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00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:07,417
I don't have time to go to the DMV.
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Tomorrow's my nail appointment,
Thursday's my chemical peel.
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Wait, you know you can't drive anywhere
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until you get this done, right?
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What is with you war
on beauty, Katharine?
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Don't you have any cool friends
I can buy a license from?
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No!
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'Cause breaking the law is never cool,
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unless it involves feeding a meter
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so a stranger doesn't get
a parking ticket.
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Take that, Louisville Town Center.
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Well, if I can't drive myself,
you'll have to drive me everywhere.
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Not gonna happen.
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Why, are you busy this week?
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Look at those glasses.
Of course you're not busy.
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I am so glad I got glasses.
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I can finally see, and I can really
emphasize my point... like this.
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Ooh, I love 'em, and I think
you look super sexy.
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00:03:57,888 --> 00:04:00,733
Well, now that I can see,
I think you look super sexy.
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00:04:01,266 --> 00:04:04,082
Okay, okay, I like where this is going.
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00:04:04,605 --> 00:04:06,585
And you just ruined it.
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00:04:07,949 --> 00:04:11,318
Hey, y'all, it's moonshine season.
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Who wants a jug of Mama's skeeter juice?
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Isn't that the stuff your cousin used
to burn his fingerprints off?
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One and the same.
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00:04:19,561 --> 00:04:22,736
It'll also take the roots
out of your sewer line.
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Oh, okay, well, sign me up.
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- So long, laser hair removal.
- I'll take two.
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I just found out my son's
production of Pippin
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isn't about Scottie.
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Mama is gonna be so proud of me.
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I sold 'em all and didn't even have to
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go to the high school this year.
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I've got amazing news.
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You do? Hang on.
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I'm listening.
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One of my songs is gonna be
in a commercial.
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What?! That's amazing. Which song?
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"Say No More." The one about
maybe meeting my dad someday.
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I love that song.
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♪ I come home and I wonder ♪
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♪ What was the journey for? ♪
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♪ My dad just sips his whiskey ♪
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♪ It's all right, son, say no more ♪
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I can't wait to get drunk with my son.
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What's the commercial about?
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No idea. It got bought by
one of those huge companies
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that makes everything from beer
to frozen pizza,
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but the important thing is
I'm gonna get paid!
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00:05:20,468 --> 00:05:22,411
Ooh, I hear that. New espresso machine
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coming our way, roomie. Yes!
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Hello, Mother.
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Well, I hope you're happy.
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I've taken one of your
ride-share services,
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and now I'm being abducted.
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Ma'am, I promise you, I'm not ab...
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I checked the box that said
"no conversation."
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Mother, no one is gonna kidnap you.
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And if they do, I assure you
they will pay me to take you back.
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00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:49,150
Why are we going through downtown?
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There's an accident on 64.
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00:05:50,637 --> 00:05:51,710
I'm sure.
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Katharine, how do I use
that pepper spray you gave me?
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00:05:56,698 --> 00:06:00,075
Oh, that's air freshener.
I would never give you a weapon. Bye!
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To Max and his messed up
relationship with his dad.
136
00:06:03,366 --> 00:06:05,587
And to Mama for once again
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outsmarting the po-po.
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00:06:11,302 --> 00:06:12,216
Ugh.
139
00:06:12,241 --> 00:06:13,744
Hoo-wee!
140
00:06:14,402 --> 00:06:16,399
So that's why people make that noise.
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Can you believe is was distilled
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in the same bathtub I was born in?
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00:06:27,110 --> 00:06:29,593
Okay, next question.
"Two vehicles arrive
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"at a four-way stop at the same time.
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Who has the right of way?"
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Obviously, the most expensive car.
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00:06:35,296 --> 00:06:37,115
This is still America.
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00:06:37,985 --> 00:06:40,227
The correct answer is
the car to your right.
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00:06:40,228 --> 00:06:42,769
Unless you're in Detroit.
Don't ever stop in Detroit.
150
00:06:42,923 --> 00:06:44,194
Here's an easy one.
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"At what blood alcohol
concentration are you impaired?"
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Me personally?
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00:06:50,482 --> 00:06:52,665
When I start telling people I love them.
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I've never seen you that drunk.
Look, if you're not gonna
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00:06:56,579 --> 00:06:58,504
take this seriously, there's
no way you're gonna pass.
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00:06:58,598 --> 00:07:02,100
Oh, who cares? So I'm driving
on an expired license.
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00:07:02,177 --> 00:07:04,160
What are they gonna do,
throw me in jail?
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00:07:04,162 --> 00:07:06,095
That's exactly what they're gonna do!
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00:07:06,620 --> 00:07:09,832
And you know what they have in jail?
Florescent lighting.
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You don't scare me.
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I drove here today and nothing happened.
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- What?!
- That's right.
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00:07:15,052 --> 00:07:17,703
And I solved the Wordle
at the same time.
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You can't drive with an expired license.
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Watch me, four-eyes.
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Give. me. your. keys.
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If you want my keys,
you'll have to take them.
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00:07:33,738 --> 00:07:37,020
Dang, that made my neck tingle.
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00:07:37,838 --> 00:07:39,933
Yeah, she'll do fine in jail.
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00:07:40,632 --> 00:07:42,626
I'm serious. Give me your purse.
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00:07:42,976 --> 00:07:45,431
- Let go.
- You let go.
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Don't hurt it, it's Gucci!
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00:07:47,147 --> 00:07:50,277
Why can't you see I am doing this
for your own...
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00:07:51,771 --> 00:07:52,985
good?
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Keys weren't even in my purse.
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00:08:04,954 --> 00:08:08,827
Dude, in less than two minutes,
your song is gonna be on national TV.
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00:08:08,852 --> 00:08:11,574
And then two minutes after that,
we're gonna watched a masked celebrity
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dressed as a taco
singing "La Vida Loca."
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00:08:13,338 --> 00:08:16,966
Ooh. Get ready to be
on my Instagram Live, Max!
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00:08:16,991 --> 00:08:19,563
Come on. You know I don't like
being the center of attention.
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00:08:19,656 --> 00:08:22,098
Darren, grab me one of those
drinks that you named after me.
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00:08:22,099 --> 00:08:25,908
Oh, one Max on the Beach
coming right up!
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00:08:26,245 --> 00:08:27,761
You're practically famous.
184
00:08:27,762 --> 00:08:30,665
It would be like if Carter's
afro ever gets on Is It Cake?
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00:08:30,834 --> 00:08:32,426
I've sent pictures in four times.
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00:08:32,775 --> 00:08:34,834
What are they so afraid of?
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00:08:35,338 --> 00:08:39,266
My cousin Janice was on TV once,
but it was Cops.
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00:08:39,418 --> 00:08:40,794
She wasn't wearing pants.
189
00:08:40,795 --> 00:08:42,903
We were so proud.
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00:08:44,681 --> 00:08:46,755
Hey, hey, Instagram.
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00:08:46,780 --> 00:08:49,248
We are live
with songwriter Max Kingbird.
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00:08:49,273 --> 00:08:51,162
- What up, Gram?
- We're roomies, too.
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00:08:51,187 --> 00:08:52,758
He ate my damn yogurt this morning.
194
00:08:52,759 --> 00:08:55,167
Anyway, say something to your fans.
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00:08:55,168 --> 00:08:57,936
Hey, guys.
Uh, this song is about my dad.
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00:08:58,088 --> 00:08:59,508
It really means a lot to me.
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00:08:59,509 --> 00:09:02,032
I'm just so honored
that you all are gonna hear it.
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00:09:02,201 --> 00:09:04,701
And if you're hot, single,
and in Louisville,
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00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:06,703
we are getting hammered on moonshine
200
00:09:06,854 --> 00:09:08,538
at The Middle C.
201
00:09:08,690 --> 00:09:11,907
He's kidding. We don't want
no Feds up in the holler.
202
00:09:12,619 --> 00:09:14,678
Wait. I think they're going
to a commercial break.
203
00:09:14,768 --> 00:09:16,593
Uh, quiet down, everybody.
204
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,761
Can everybody please quiet down?
205
00:09:18,762 --> 00:09:21,392
Hey, shut the hell up!
206
00:09:22,336 --> 00:09:24,566
Oh, uh, I think they heard you
207
00:09:24,567 --> 00:09:27,648
'cause they were already
quieting from when I... said it.
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00:09:30,303 --> 00:09:32,211
Oh, boy.
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00:09:38,997 --> 00:09:40,243
I'm back.
210
00:09:40,612 --> 00:09:43,603
I love it when people come back.
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00:09:49,397 --> 00:09:51,808
♪ I come home and I wonder ♪
212
00:09:51,809 --> 00:09:55,439
♪ What was the journey for... ♪
213
00:10:02,986 --> 00:10:05,095
What the hell did they do to your song?
214
00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:09,284
It's a disaster. The labradoodle's flat.
215
00:10:12,086 --> 00:10:15,013
Neumann's Hill Farm Fresh Dog Food...
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00:10:15,038 --> 00:10:18,509
Organic, healthy, delicious.
217
00:10:25,946 --> 00:10:28,178
How great was that?
218
00:10:30,015 --> 00:10:33,183
I-I think my aunt uses that dog food.
219
00:10:33,458 --> 00:10:35,870
That's the end of my story.
220
00:10:36,875 --> 00:10:38,876
Look, it's broadcast TV.
221
00:10:38,877 --> 00:10:40,891
No one our age is watching.
222
00:10:41,297 --> 00:10:43,882
Except for all of y'all. You're cool.
223
00:10:50,832 --> 00:10:53,478
Sorry. My thumb already had it going.
224
00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,568
Hey, I got champagne
if you want to celebrate
225
00:11:02,569 --> 00:11:05,663
and tequila if you want
to get white-girl wasted.
226
00:11:07,806 --> 00:11:10,051
Okay, champagne with tequila.
227
00:11:10,186 --> 00:11:12,482
That's called "The Oldest Bridesmaid."
228
00:11:13,740 --> 00:11:15,383
I wrote that song about wanting
229
00:11:15,384 --> 00:11:18,284
to connect with my father
before he dies.
230
00:11:19,396 --> 00:11:21,659
Nobody's gonna take me seriously now.
231
00:11:21,682 --> 00:11:23,304
That is not true.
232
00:11:23,305 --> 00:11:26,024
Eddie Vedder got his start
writing the jingle for Chili's.
233
00:11:26,025 --> 00:11:28,798
- Really?
- Don't google it, but yeah.
234
00:11:29,641 --> 00:11:32,432
Look, I know that did not
turn out the way you expected,
235
00:11:32,433 --> 00:11:34,162
but it's still a huge deal, Max.
236
00:11:34,163 --> 00:11:37,384
Look, I get what you're trying
to do, but I'm not in the mood.
237
00:11:37,385 --> 00:11:38,644
Max, it's not like
it's the end of your...
238
00:11:38,645 --> 00:11:40,085
Kat, stop.
239
00:11:40,110 --> 00:11:41,677
I want to be alone.
240
00:11:43,044 --> 00:11:45,190
Right. Sorry.
241
00:11:47,478 --> 00:11:49,275
Are you Max Kingbird?
242
00:11:49,276 --> 00:11:50,942
We saw you on Instagram Live.
243
00:11:50,967 --> 00:11:52,999
Oh, sorry, ladies.
He's not really in the mood.
244
00:11:53,024 --> 00:11:54,100
Hang on.
245
00:11:54,429 --> 00:11:58,183
Have you ladies ever heard of a
drink called "The Oldest Bridesmaid"?
246
00:11:58,265 --> 00:12:00,368
Here. Right this way. Right this way.
247
00:12:00,369 --> 00:12:02,380
- Max.
- What?
248
00:12:02,853 --> 00:12:04,862
Misery loves...
249
00:12:05,230 --> 00:12:07,384
A threesome.
250
00:12:09,790 --> 00:12:12,752
Okay, it's your driver's test,
and I'm the DMV person.
251
00:12:12,782 --> 00:12:15,299
Why don't we start by pulling
into that Fuddruckers?
252
00:12:15,452 --> 00:12:16,784
Okay.
253
00:12:16,878 --> 00:12:18,263
No! It's a trick.
254
00:12:18,288 --> 00:12:20,397
You don't go to Fuddruckers
on your driver's test!
255
00:12:20,422 --> 00:12:22,966
You get to go after if you pass.
256
00:12:23,239 --> 00:12:26,266
Or fail. Either way,
we're going to Fuddruckers.
257
00:12:26,646 --> 00:12:27,780
Oh, red light.
258
00:12:27,781 --> 00:12:30,076
Yes, I can see that. Thank you.
259
00:12:31,288 --> 00:12:33,240
Really? Lipstick right now?
260
00:12:33,265 --> 00:12:34,279
It's for you.
261
00:12:34,304 --> 00:12:36,912
It'll draw the eye away
from those glasses.
262
00:12:37,559 --> 00:12:38,990
Yeah, well, say what you will,
263
00:12:39,084 --> 00:12:40,658
but that motorcycle cop called me.
264
00:12:40,752 --> 00:12:42,290
She wants to have drinks Friday night.
265
00:12:43,105 --> 00:12:45,336
- Green light.
- I know.
266
00:12:45,337 --> 00:12:47,458
I just like to be a careful
and courteous...
267
00:12:47,483 --> 00:12:50,014
Oh, bite me, asshat!
268
00:12:50,996 --> 00:12:53,172
Yeah, you're gonna sail
through this driving test.
269
00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:56,350
I don't know why you enjoy
criticizing me so much.
270
00:12:56,351 --> 00:12:57,934
Are you kidding me right now?
271
00:12:58,085 --> 00:12:59,994
You do nothing but criticize me.
272
00:13:00,013 --> 00:13:02,353
Oh, so now I'm a bad driver
and a bad mother?
273
00:13:02,354 --> 00:13:04,829
I never said you were a bad driver.
274
00:13:05,504 --> 00:13:09,172
It doesn't matter how I drive.
I'm going to fail anyway.
275
00:13:09,474 --> 00:13:10,883
Why do you say that?
276
00:13:11,391 --> 00:13:13,060
I'm going blind.
277
00:13:15,678 --> 00:13:16,992
What?
278
00:13:18,586 --> 00:13:20,371
I found out while you were on your trip.
279
00:13:21,460 --> 00:13:24,047
I don't understand. How could you...?
280
00:13:24,048 --> 00:13:26,314
Oh, bite me, asshat!
281
00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:35,081
I have macular degeneration.
282
00:13:36,239 --> 00:13:40,201
A fancy way of saying that,
over the next five to ten years,
283
00:13:40,242 --> 00:13:42,143
I'm going to lose my sight.
284
00:13:43,022 --> 00:13:45,039
There's got to be something they can do.
285
00:13:45,064 --> 00:13:45,899
Well, there isn't.
286
00:13:45,900 --> 00:13:49,159
I'm taking medication,
but it'll only slow it down.
287
00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:53,105
And that's why you never went
to get your license renewed.
288
00:13:53,130 --> 00:13:55,282
I knew I couldn't pass the eye exam.
289
00:13:55,783 --> 00:13:57,333
I'm so sorry.
290
00:13:57,777 --> 00:14:02,129
I always thought, if I didn't
act old, I wouldn't get old.
291
00:14:04,526 --> 00:14:08,920
I don't know what kind of life
I'm going to have if I can't drive.
292
00:14:09,839 --> 00:14:11,802
We'll figure something out.
293
00:14:11,803 --> 00:14:13,262
I did figure it out.
294
00:14:13,263 --> 00:14:16,614
I was going to continue to
drive illegally, and you ruined it.
295
00:14:16,615 --> 00:14:19,812
- Mother...
- Look, Katharine, it is what it is,
296
00:14:19,813 --> 00:14:22,106
and wallowing isn't going to help.
297
00:14:24,403 --> 00:14:27,402
Find me the nearest bar.
298
00:14:29,627 --> 00:14:32,403
Wait. You can't drive if you can't see.
299
00:14:32,428 --> 00:14:35,238
And you can't get a man
if you wear those ski goggles,
300
00:14:35,239 --> 00:14:36,871
but here we are.
301
00:14:49,019 --> 00:14:50,352
- Hey, baby.
- Hey.
302
00:14:50,504 --> 00:14:53,021
You think I could have a career
as a hand model?
303
00:14:53,907 --> 00:14:55,932
I think I'm rewatching Bridgerton,
304
00:14:55,984 --> 00:14:57,573
and the duke is about
to take off his shirt.
305
00:14:57,574 --> 00:15:00,298
Well, I was picking up dinner,
and I was reaching for the lasagna,
306
00:15:00,299 --> 00:15:02,984
and the lady said,
"You have lovely hands."
307
00:15:02,985 --> 00:15:05,959
- She just wanted a bigger tip.
- That don't make her a liar.
308
00:15:06,111 --> 00:15:07,895
Should we get mani-pedis this weekend?
309
00:15:07,896 --> 00:15:10,124
Can I just watch my lady porn?
310
00:15:12,802 --> 00:15:14,212
What's up, Darren?
311
00:15:14,470 --> 00:15:17,427
Make it quick. I'm about
to Bridgerton and chill.
312
00:15:17,428 --> 00:15:19,198
No, he isn't.
313
00:15:20,368 --> 00:15:22,058
You might want to come down here.
314
00:15:23,910 --> 00:15:25,727
♪ Woof, woof ♪
315
00:15:25,752 --> 00:15:27,734
♪ Woof, woof, woof. ♪
316
00:15:32,713 --> 00:15:34,505
Come on, everybody.
317
00:15:34,530 --> 00:15:37,637
Put your paws together!
318
00:15:38,969 --> 00:15:40,407
Crap.
319
00:15:49,505 --> 00:15:52,615
I must really be drunk.
I can't even taste the whiskey in this.
320
00:15:52,842 --> 00:15:54,099
It's coffee.
321
00:15:54,248 --> 00:15:57,750
Yeah, I'm not doing caffeine these days.
It's bad for your health.
322
00:15:58,978 --> 00:16:00,694
What the hell is wrong with you?
323
00:16:00,719 --> 00:16:04,147
You come down here, get drunk,
bark at my customers.
324
00:16:04,386 --> 00:16:07,513
I ought to swat you on the nose
with a rolled-up newspaper.
325
00:16:08,132 --> 00:16:09,934
Have you seen TikTok lately?
326
00:16:09,935 --> 00:16:11,983
You talking about
the bikini jump-rope challenge?
327
00:16:12,136 --> 00:16:13,854
It's okay to look
328
00:16:13,879 --> 00:16:17,491
'cause they're raising money
for juvenile diabetes.
329
00:16:19,351 --> 00:16:22,955
Thousands of people
posted videos singing my song
330
00:16:22,980 --> 00:16:24,829
with their dogs.
331
00:16:26,361 --> 00:16:28,313
I'm an Internet joke.
332
00:16:28,986 --> 00:16:31,482
I wrote the new
"Never Gonna Give You Up."
333
00:16:31,483 --> 00:16:35,093
Oh, you must be drunk if you're
hating on my boy Rick Astley.
334
00:16:36,347 --> 00:16:39,344
I thought
it was gonna go away, but now...
335
00:16:39,585 --> 00:16:42,606
It's gonna dog you forever?
336
00:16:42,803 --> 00:16:46,016
Damn. How come I'm always clever
when Randi's not around?
337
00:16:47,354 --> 00:16:49,678
That song came from my heart.
338
00:16:50,641 --> 00:16:52,262
I'm an artist.
339
00:16:52,263 --> 00:16:55,141
Oh, you're an artist now.
340
00:16:55,142 --> 00:16:57,881
I thought you were a guy
who just threw up in my piano.
341
00:16:58,506 --> 00:17:00,654
- You don't get it.
- I don't get it?
342
00:17:00,844 --> 00:17:03,938
You wrote that song so people
would hear it and enjoy it.
343
00:17:03,963 --> 00:17:06,004
And now, all those people do.
344
00:17:06,760 --> 00:17:08,356
I don't know, man.
345
00:17:08,732 --> 00:17:10,462
Sounds like a win to me.
346
00:17:10,888 --> 00:17:13,573
And that's not just me
throwing you a bone.
347
00:17:14,465 --> 00:17:16,613
I don't like clever Carter.
348
00:17:16,614 --> 00:17:18,642
And I don't like having
to drive down here
349
00:17:18,719 --> 00:17:20,042
and leave behind lasagna
350
00:17:20,043 --> 00:17:22,721
and a girlfriend who's all
revved up from Bridgerton.
351
00:17:22,873 --> 00:17:24,677
Bridgerton, man!
352
00:17:25,175 --> 00:17:27,015
I just don't want to be known as the guy
353
00:17:27,040 --> 00:17:29,000
who did the stupid dog food song.
354
00:17:29,001 --> 00:17:31,725
Better than being the guy
who never did anything.
355
00:17:35,450 --> 00:17:36,994
Can you take me home?
356
00:17:37,345 --> 00:17:39,697
Sure. Hey, if we hurry,
357
00:17:39,698 --> 00:17:41,848
I'll still have time
to hit Randi with a little,
358
00:17:41,849 --> 00:17:45,243
"Evenin' Duchess.
You fancy me bangers and mash?"
359
00:17:45,730 --> 00:17:48,380
I really don't know
why Randi has sex with you.
360
00:17:48,985 --> 00:17:51,349
Hey, you think I could be a hand model?
361
00:17:51,437 --> 00:17:52,140
What?
362
00:17:52,141 --> 00:17:56,419
Just imagine a slo-mo shot
of me putting on lotion.
363
00:17:59,811 --> 00:18:00,977
Hello?
364
00:18:01,002 --> 00:18:02,502
Oh, Katharine?
365
00:18:02,770 --> 00:18:03,918
Hey.
366
00:18:04,478 --> 00:18:06,081
What are you doing here?
367
00:18:06,729 --> 00:18:08,768
Wait. How much do you need?
368
00:18:09,956 --> 00:18:13,170
I don't need money.
I've got a mother who loves me.
369
00:18:15,618 --> 00:18:18,027
There's your father's sense of whimsy.
370
00:18:18,477 --> 00:18:20,737
I came to take you to yoga.
371
00:18:21,052 --> 00:18:24,233
Oh. Well, since I can't drive,
372
00:18:24,258 --> 00:18:27,026
I... I hadn't planned on
going anyplace for a while.
373
00:18:27,046 --> 00:18:28,620
That's why I'm here.
374
00:18:28,772 --> 00:18:32,698
I took the day off so I can take
you to yoga and the hair salon.
375
00:18:32,723 --> 00:18:35,392
I'm pretty sure I'm still owed
a trip to Fuddruckers.
376
00:18:36,113 --> 00:18:37,796
I can't ask you to do that.
377
00:18:38,010 --> 00:18:39,705
You don't have to ask.
378
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:41,326
I want to.
379
00:18:41,709 --> 00:18:42,951
Really?
380
00:18:42,969 --> 00:18:45,211
Of course. You're my mother.
381
00:18:45,230 --> 00:18:47,604
I'm not gonna let you
go through this alone.
382
00:18:51,696 --> 00:18:53,097
Why are you squeezing me?
383
00:18:53,098 --> 00:18:54,990
Oh. It's a hug.
384
00:18:55,471 --> 00:18:57,779
Cross that off my bucket list.
385
00:19:00,137 --> 00:19:02,032
I love you, sweetheart.
386
00:19:03,198 --> 00:19:04,676
I love you, too.
387
00:19:05,588 --> 00:19:08,488
As long as we're going to
my salon, won't you let Francois
388
00:19:08,513 --> 00:19:10,098
- finally...?
- Okay, don't push it.
389
00:19:10,099 --> 00:19:13,311
Sorry if I wanted you to look
nice for your new lady friend.
390
00:19:18,917 --> 00:19:20,551
Hey, Internet. I'm Max Kingbird.
391
00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:23,324
I wrote the song that inspired
all the singing dog videos,
392
00:19:23,349 --> 00:19:27,534
uh, trending number two right below
"hashtag double-D double Dutch."
393
00:19:28,421 --> 00:19:31,359
Anyway, I thought maybe
you'd like to hear my version.
394
00:19:33,083 --> 00:19:36,084
♪ Touchdown in Baton Rouge ♪
395
00:19:36,921 --> 00:19:39,018
♪ 20 years gone... ♪
396
00:19:39,043 --> 00:19:40,065
Take it partner.
397
00:19:40,090 --> 00:19:43,741
♪ Tough old man I hardly know says ♪
398
00:19:43,761 --> 00:19:46,577
♪ "Welcome home, son" ♪
399
00:19:46,597 --> 00:19:50,245
♪ The years were written on his face ♪
400
00:19:50,285 --> 00:19:53,917
♪ They gave way to a smile ♪
401
00:19:53,942 --> 00:19:57,917
♪ He shook my handand poured a glass, and said ♪
402
00:19:57,942 --> 00:19:59,901
♪ "Won't you stay a while?" ♪
403
00:20:00,818 --> 00:20:02,310
♪ Said... ♪ Oh.
404
00:20:02,311 --> 00:20:03,933
Oh.
405
00:20:03,934 --> 00:20:05,239
Hey. Hey.
406
00:20:10,913 --> 00:20:15,579
♪ Touchdown in Baton Rouge,20 years gone ♪
407
00:20:15,909 --> 00:20:19,069
♪ A tough old man I hardly know said ♪
408
00:20:19,070 --> 00:20:20,796
♪ "Welcome home, son" ♪
409
00:20:20,797 --> 00:20:25,840
♪ I come home and I wonder,what was the journey for ♪
410
00:20:26,482 --> 00:20:28,816
♪ My old man sips his whiskey ♪
411
00:20:28,841 --> 00:20:31,508
♪ "It's all right, son. Say no more" ♪
412
00:20:31,533 --> 00:20:33,550
♪ My old man sips his whiskey ♪
413
00:20:33,627 --> 00:20:38,254
♪ "It's all right, son. Say no more." ♪
414
00:20:43,090 --> 00:20:47,090
- Synced and corrected by synk -
- www.addic7ed.com -
31538
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