All language subtitles for Woryuds

i'm going left on red you can't stop me

i'm going left on red you can't stop me
from<00:00:06.000> being<00:00:06.879> who<00:00:07.440> i<00:00:07.680> want<00:00:08.080> to<00:00:08.480> be

from being who i want to be

from being who i want to be
well<00:00:10.559> i<00:00:10.719> identify<00:00:11.360> as<00:00:11.840> a<00:00:12.000> man<00:00:12.480> a<00:00:12.639> gay<00:00:12.880> man<00:00:13.360> a

well i identify as a man a gay man a

well i identify as a man a gay man a
comedian

comedian

comedian
a<00:00:14.880> jew<00:00:15.599> i<00:00:15.759> also<00:00:15.920> like

a jew i also like

a jew i also like
just<00:00:18.240> kidding

just kidding

just kidding
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
gay<00:00:30.800> male<00:00:31.119> white<00:00:31.439> of<00:00:31.679> italian<00:00:32.399> american

gay male white of italian american

gay male white of italian american
background<00:00:34.079> and<00:00:34.559> they've<00:00:35.360> now<00:00:35.600> retired

background and they've now retired

background and they've now retired
a<00:00:36.960> new<00:00:37.120> york<00:00:37.200> city<00:00:37.440> police<00:00:37.680> detective

a new york city police detective

a new york city police detective
[Music]

lesbian comedian

lesbian comedian
vegetarian<00:00:47.039> ocd

vegetarian ocd

vegetarian ocd
ocd

ocd

ocd
ocd<00:00:51.039> i<00:00:51.280> identify<00:00:52.000> as<00:00:52.239> an<00:00:52.480> artist<00:00:52.960> i'm<00:00:53.120> an<00:00:53.280> actor

ocd i identify as an artist i'm an actor

ocd i identify as an artist i'm an actor
a<00:00:54.079> drag<00:00:54.399> queen<00:00:55.039> a<00:00:55.199> woman

a drag queen a woman

a drag queen a woman
a<00:00:56.480> step

a step

a step
eccentric<00:00:58.640> excitable

eccentric excitable

eccentric excitable
humorist

humorist

humorist
performer

performer

performer
i<00:01:02.640> always<00:01:02.800> go<00:01:02.960> from<00:01:03.120> the<00:01:03.199> inside<00:01:03.600> out

i always go from the inside out

i always go from the inside out
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
as<00:01:10.320> far<00:01:10.479> as<00:01:10.640> my<00:01:10.799> comedy<00:01:11.600> being<00:01:11.840> influenced<00:01:12.240> by

as far as my comedy being influenced by

as far as my comedy being influenced by
my<00:01:12.640> gay<00:01:12.880> identity<00:01:13.600> it's<00:01:13.760> sort<00:01:13.920> of<00:01:14.000> hard<00:01:14.240> to

my gay identity it's sort of hard to

my gay identity it's sort of hard to
separate<00:01:14.960> one<00:01:15.200> from<00:01:15.360> the<00:01:15.520> other<00:01:15.759> because<00:01:16.560> i

separate one from the other because i

separate one from the other because i
talk<00:01:17.119> about<00:01:17.840> myself<00:01:18.400> and<00:01:18.479> my<00:01:18.640> life<00:01:18.960> and<00:01:19.439> tell

talk about myself and my life and tell

talk about myself and my life and tell
stories<00:01:20.080> that<00:01:20.240> have<00:01:20.320> happened<00:01:20.640> to<00:01:20.720> me<00:01:21.280> so

stories that have happened to me so

stories that have happened to me so
the<00:01:22.400> only<00:01:22.560> way<00:01:22.799> i<00:01:22.880> can<00:01:23.040> tell<00:01:23.280> those<00:01:23.520> stories<00:01:23.920> is

the only way i can tell those stories is

the only way i can tell those stories is
as<00:01:24.320> a<00:01:24.400> gay<00:01:24.640> man<00:01:24.960> that's<00:01:25.200> who<00:01:25.360> i<00:01:25.600> am<00:01:26.080> i'm<00:01:26.240> at<00:01:26.320> that

as a gay man that's who i am i'm at that

as a gay man that's who i am i'm at that
age<00:01:26.799> now<00:01:26.960> where<00:01:27.200> like

age now where like

age now where like
young<00:01:28.320> guys<00:01:28.799> are<00:01:28.880> starting<00:01:29.200> to<00:01:29.280> hit<00:01:29.520> me<00:01:29.759> up

young guys are starting to hit me up

young guys are starting to hit me up
and<00:01:31.119> uh<00:01:31.439> and<00:01:31.520> that's<00:01:31.920> fine<00:01:32.240> except<00:01:32.560> i<00:01:32.720> think

and uh and that's fine except i think

and uh and that's fine except i think
they<00:01:33.040> think<00:01:33.280> that<00:01:33.439> i'm<00:01:33.520> like<00:01:33.759> a<00:01:33.920> daddy

they think that i'm like a daddy

they think that i'm like a daddy
because<00:01:35.520> some<00:01:35.680> of<00:01:35.759> them<00:01:35.920> actually<00:01:36.240> call<00:01:36.479> me

because some of them actually call me

because some of them actually call me
that<00:01:36.880> they're<00:01:37.119> like<00:01:37.280> hey<00:01:37.520> daddy<00:01:38.320> and<00:01:38.479> i'm<00:01:38.640> like

that they're like hey daddy and i'm like

that they're like hey daddy and i'm like
um

um

um
i<00:01:40.960> don't<00:01:41.119> really<00:01:41.360> have<00:01:41.520> the<00:01:41.920> to<00:01:42.079> be<00:01:42.240> a<00:01:42.399> daddy

i don't really have the to be a daddy

i don't really have the to be a daddy
i<00:01:44.640> have<00:01:44.720> to<00:01:45.200> be<00:01:45.360> like<00:01:45.600> a<00:01:45.680> younger<00:01:46.000> brother

and also it's one thing to be dating

and also it's one thing to be dating
someone<00:01:50.399> who's<00:01:50.560> younger<00:01:50.799> than<00:01:50.960> you<00:01:51.119> it's

someone who's younger than you it's

someone who's younger than you it's
another<00:01:51.439> thing<00:01:51.520> to<00:01:51.600> be<00:01:51.680> dating<00:01:51.920> someone<00:01:52.159> who's

another thing to be dating someone who's

another thing to be dating someone who's
a<00:01:52.479> different<00:01:52.880> generation<00:01:53.600> than<00:01:53.840> you<00:01:54.159> like

a different generation than you like

a different generation than you like
that

that

that
like<00:01:56.079> because<00:01:56.240> when<00:01:56.399> i<00:01:56.479> was<00:01:56.640> in<00:01:56.719> my<00:01:56.880> 30s<00:01:57.280> and<00:01:57.360> i

like because when i was in my 30s and i

like because when i was in my 30s and i
would<00:01:57.680> like<00:01:57.840> date<00:01:58.000> a<00:01:58.079> guy<00:01:58.240> in<00:01:58.399> his<00:01:58.560> 20s<00:01:58.880> i'd<00:01:59.040> be

would like date a guy in his 20s i'd be

would like date a guy in his 20s i'd be
like<00:01:59.360> you<00:01:59.520> know

like you know

like you know
when<00:02:01.439> i<00:02:01.520> was<00:02:01.680> 25<00:02:02.320> you<00:02:02.479> were<00:02:02.640> 17.

when i was 25 you were 17.

when i was 25 you were 17.
that's<00:02:04.320> kind<00:02:04.479> of<00:02:04.640> hot<00:02:05.360> you<00:02:05.520> know

that's kind of hot you know

that's kind of hot you know
but<00:02:06.479> now<00:02:06.719> it's<00:02:06.880> like<00:02:07.119> hey<00:02:07.840> you<00:02:07.920> know<00:02:08.080> when<00:02:08.239> i

but now it's like hey you know when i

but now it's like hey you know when i
was<00:02:08.560> 25<00:02:09.679> you<00:02:09.840> were<00:02:10.239> four

was 25 you were four

was 25 you were four
[Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause]
and<00:02:13.920> that's<00:02:14.400> really<00:02:15.040> hot

and that's really hot

and that's really hot
it<00:02:16.720> never<00:02:16.959> occurred<00:02:17.280> to<00:02:17.440> me<00:02:17.599> to<00:02:17.680> be<00:02:17.840> closeted

it never occurred to me to be closeted

it never occurred to me to be closeted
on<00:02:18.640> stage<00:02:19.040> because<00:02:19.200> i<00:02:19.280> was<00:02:19.440> not<00:02:19.599> closing<00:02:20.239> my

on stage because i was not closing my

on stage because i was not closing my
life

life

life
after<00:02:21.440> the<00:02:21.520> age<00:02:21.680> of<00:02:21.840> 21<00:02:22.800> and<00:02:23.120> so<00:02:23.840> um

after the age of 21 and so um

after the age of 21 and so um
i<00:02:24.879> think<00:02:25.040> i<00:02:25.280> was<00:02:25.520> quickly<00:02:25.920> branded<00:02:26.400> a<00:02:26.560> gay

i think i was quickly branded a gay

i think i was quickly branded a gay
comedian<00:02:27.360> and<00:02:27.440> i<00:02:27.599> still<00:02:27.920> am<00:02:28.560> and<00:02:28.720> i<00:02:28.800> don't<00:02:29.040> mind

comedian and i still am and i don't mind

comedian and i still am and i don't mind
that<00:02:30.000> but<00:02:30.400> uh<00:02:30.720> in<00:02:30.879> some<00:02:31.120> ways<00:02:31.760> i<00:02:31.920> feel<00:02:32.160> like<00:02:32.560> if

that but uh in some ways i feel like if

that but uh in some ways i feel like if
i<00:02:33.040> were<00:02:33.440> a<00:02:33.599> straight<00:02:33.920> guy<00:02:34.640> telling

i were a straight guy telling

i were a straight guy telling
dating<00:02:36.239> stories<00:02:36.720> and<00:02:36.879> sex<00:02:37.200> stories<00:02:37.519> and<00:02:37.599> all

dating stories and sex stories and all

dating stories and sex stories and all
the<00:02:37.840> things<00:02:38.080> i<00:02:38.239> talk<00:02:38.400> about<00:02:39.040> nobody<00:02:39.440> would

the things i talk about nobody would

the things i talk about nobody would
really<00:02:39.920> notice<00:02:40.560> my<00:02:40.720> sexual<00:02:41.120> orientation<00:02:41.840> it's

really notice my sexual orientation it's

really notice my sexual orientation it's
only<00:02:42.239> because<00:02:42.400> i'm<00:02:42.640> a<00:02:42.720> gay<00:02:42.959> comedian<00:02:43.680> that

only because i'm a gay comedian that

only because i'm a gay comedian that
it's<00:02:44.080> like<00:02:44.239> oh<00:02:44.400> he's<00:02:44.640> the<00:02:44.720> gay<00:02:44.959> comedian<00:02:45.680> what

it's like oh he's the gay comedian what

it's like oh he's the gay comedian what
i<00:02:46.000> think<00:02:46.160> a<00:02:46.239> lot<00:02:46.400> of<00:02:46.480> people<00:02:46.800> do<00:02:47.040> for<00:02:47.200> comedy<00:02:47.680> is

i think a lot of people do for comedy is

i think a lot of people do for comedy is
you<00:02:47.920> do<00:02:48.080> what<00:02:48.160> you<00:02:48.319> know

you do what you know

you do what you know
and<00:02:49.840> you<00:02:50.000> know<00:02:50.160> yourself<00:02:50.640> best<00:02:51.200> so<00:02:51.840> i<00:02:52.000> think

and you know yourself best so i think

and you know yourself best so i think
the<00:02:52.640> comedy<00:02:53.120> that<00:02:53.200> i<00:02:53.360> do<00:02:53.840> reflects<00:02:54.400> me<00:02:54.720> so<00:02:55.040> it's

the comedy that i do reflects me so it's

the comedy that i do reflects me so it's
very<00:02:55.599> difficult<00:02:56.000> for<00:02:56.160> me<00:02:56.400> to<00:02:56.640> not

very difficult for me to not

very difficult for me to not
talk<00:02:58.640> about<00:02:58.879> being<00:02:59.599> you<00:02:59.680> know<00:02:59.920> a<00:03:00.000> lesbian<00:03:00.720> a

talk about being you know a lesbian a

talk about being you know a lesbian a
vegetarian<00:03:01.760> a<00:03:01.840> woman

vegetarian a woman

vegetarian a woman
in<00:03:03.280> ocd<00:03:03.760> i<00:03:03.920> used<00:03:04.080> to<00:03:04.159> wonder<00:03:04.480> if<00:03:04.640> the<00:03:04.800> people

in ocd i used to wonder if the people

in ocd i used to wonder if the people
that<00:03:05.200> i<00:03:05.440> worked<00:03:05.680> with<00:03:05.920> during<00:03:06.239> the<00:03:06.319> day

that i worked with during the day

that i worked with during the day
you<00:03:07.360> know<00:03:07.599> knew<00:03:07.840> that<00:03:08.000> i<00:03:08.159> was<00:03:08.400> gay<00:03:09.200> and<00:03:09.440> then<00:03:09.599> i

you know knew that i was gay and then i

you know knew that i was gay and then i
remembered<00:03:10.400> they<00:03:10.640> can<00:03:10.879> see<00:03:11.200> me

identity and roles and

identity and roles and
labels

labels

labels
especially<00:03:19.280> for<00:03:19.519> me<00:03:19.840> i<00:03:20.080> find<00:03:20.319> that<00:03:20.560> you<00:03:20.720> know

especially for me i find that you know

especially for me i find that you know
when<00:03:20.959> i<00:03:21.040> was<00:03:21.360> growing<00:03:21.840> up<00:03:22.159> a<00:03:22.319> lot<00:03:22.480> of<00:03:22.640> that

when i was growing up a lot of that

when i was growing up a lot of that
was<00:03:24.159> helpful

was helpful

was helpful
to<00:03:25.440> to<00:03:26.080> let<00:03:26.239> me<00:03:26.400> understand<00:03:26.799> who<00:03:26.959> i<00:03:27.120> was<00:03:28.000> you

to to let me understand who i was you

to to let me understand who i was you
know

know

know
when<00:03:30.159> i<00:03:30.239> was<00:03:30.560> very<00:03:30.720> young<00:03:30.959> there<00:03:31.040> wasn't<00:03:31.440> there

when i was very young there wasn't there

when i was very young there wasn't there
wasn't<00:03:31.920> a<00:03:32.000> lot<00:03:32.239> of<00:03:32.480> role<00:03:32.720> models<00:03:33.120> out<00:03:33.200> there

wasn't a lot of role models out there

wasn't a lot of role models out there
with<00:03:33.599> a<00:03:33.599> lot<00:03:33.760> of<00:03:34.000> gay<00:03:34.560> um

with a lot of gay um

with a lot of gay um
role<00:03:35.760> models<00:03:36.159> out<00:03:36.400> there<00:03:37.120> uh<00:03:37.599> so

role models out there uh so

role models out there uh so
it's<00:03:38.879> kind<00:03:39.040> of<00:03:39.120> like<00:03:39.599> helps<00:03:39.920> you<00:03:40.480> get<00:03:40.640> an<00:03:40.799> idea

it's kind of like helps you get an idea

it's kind of like helps you get an idea
like<00:03:41.599> why<00:03:41.840> am<00:03:42.000> i<00:03:42.319> you<00:03:42.400> know<00:03:42.640> riding<00:03:42.959> my<00:03:43.200> bike

like why am i you know riding my bike

like why am i you know riding my bike
past<00:03:43.680> this<00:03:43.840> girl's<00:03:44.159> house<00:03:44.560> all<00:03:44.640> the<00:03:44.799> time

past this girl's house all the time

past this girl's house all the time
you<00:03:45.760> know<00:03:46.000> now<00:03:46.239> i<00:03:46.400> know<00:03:46.799> okay

you know now i know okay

you know now i know okay
you<00:03:47.920> know<00:03:48.159> not<00:03:48.560> all<00:03:48.799> girls<00:03:49.519> do<00:03:49.760> that

you know not all girls do that

you know not all girls do that
so<00:03:51.280> you<00:03:51.440> know<00:03:51.920> it<00:03:52.080> it<00:03:52.319> helps<00:03:53.120> uh<00:03:53.519> to

so you know it it helps uh to

so you know it it helps uh to
to<00:03:54.480> begin<00:03:54.959> and<00:03:55.040> then<00:03:55.200> you<00:03:55.360> kind<00:03:55.519> of

to begin and then you kind of

to begin and then you kind of
on<00:03:56.640> that<00:03:56.879> you<00:03:57.200> know<00:03:57.360> you<00:03:57.920> you<00:03:58.159> get<00:03:58.319> your<00:03:58.560> own

on that you know you you get your own

on that you know you you get your own
identity<00:03:59.360> you<00:03:59.519> know<00:03:59.599> as<00:03:59.760> you<00:03:59.920> grow<00:04:00.159> and<00:04:00.239> you

identity you know as you grow and you

identity you know as you grow and you
learn<00:04:00.640> more<00:04:00.879> about<00:04:01.040> yourself<00:04:02.000> and

learn more about yourself and

learn more about yourself and
you<00:04:03.040> know<00:04:03.200> i<00:04:03.280> think<00:04:03.519> it<00:04:03.920> it<00:04:04.080> develops<00:04:04.400> from

you know i think it it develops from

you know i think it it develops from
there<00:04:04.799> but<00:04:04.879> i<00:04:05.040> think

there but i think

there but i think
it<00:04:06.400> start<00:04:06.720> you<00:04:06.879> off<00:04:07.120> give<00:04:07.280> you<00:04:07.439> an<00:04:07.519> idea<00:04:07.920> it

it start you off give you an idea it

it start you off give you an idea it
gives<00:04:08.239> you<00:04:08.480> you<00:04:08.560> know

gives you you know

gives you you know
something<00:04:09.840> to<00:04:09.920> go<00:04:10.159> from<00:04:10.879> i<00:04:10.959> don't

something to go from i don't

something to go from i don't
think<00:04:12.400> about<00:04:12.720> it<00:04:12.959> ever<00:04:13.680> i<00:04:13.840> just<00:04:14.000> think<00:04:14.319> about

think about it ever i just think about

think about it ever i just think about
being<00:04:15.360> me<00:04:15.680> frank

being me frank

being me frank
you<00:04:16.720> know<00:04:17.440> i<00:04:17.600> find<00:04:17.840> that<00:04:17.919> whenever<00:04:18.320> i've

you know i find that whenever i've

you know i find that whenever i've
identified

identified

identified
as<00:04:21.120> one<00:04:21.440> thing

as one thing

as one thing
that<00:04:23.360> it<00:04:23.440> confuses<00:04:24.080> people<00:04:24.479> because<00:04:24.720> i<00:04:24.880> don't

that it confuses people because i don't

that it confuses people because i don't
fit<00:04:25.360> in<00:04:25.600> the<00:04:25.759> box<00:04:26.160> that<00:04:26.320> they<00:04:26.479> have<00:04:26.720> in<00:04:26.800> their

fit in the box that they have in their

fit in the box that they have in their
mind<00:04:27.919> of<00:04:28.080> what<00:04:28.240> i<00:04:28.400> should<00:04:28.560> be

mind of what i should be

mind of what i should be
i<00:04:30.400> hate<00:04:30.560> when<00:04:30.720> i<00:04:30.800> hear<00:04:30.960> myself<00:04:31.360> breathe<00:04:31.600> into

i hate when i hear myself breathe into

i hate when i hear myself breathe into
the<00:04:31.840> microphone<00:04:32.400> it<00:04:32.479> reminds<00:04:32.800> me<00:04:32.960> of<00:04:33.040> eating

the microphone it reminds me of eating

the microphone it reminds me of eating
chef<00:04:33.680> boyardee<00:04:34.240> out<00:04:34.400> of<00:04:34.479> the<00:04:34.639> can

chef boyardee out of the can

chef boyardee out of the can
best<00:04:37.360> diet<00:04:37.759> ever<00:04:38.000> eat<00:04:38.240> chef<00:04:38.560> boyardee<00:04:39.120> out<00:04:39.199> of

best diet ever eat chef boyardee out of

best diet ever eat chef boyardee out of
the<00:04:39.440> can<00:04:39.759> nude<00:04:40.240> in<00:04:40.320> front<00:04:40.479> of<00:04:40.639> a<00:04:40.720> mirror<00:04:40.960> you'll

the can nude in front of a mirror you'll

the can nude in front of a mirror you'll
never<00:04:41.680> cheat<00:04:41.919> again

never cheat again

never cheat again
i<00:04:43.919> don't<00:04:44.080> even<00:04:44.240> know<00:04:44.400> what<00:04:44.560> my<00:04:44.800> mid-drift

i don't even know what my mid-drift

i don't even know what my mid-drift
looks<00:04:45.520> like<00:04:45.680> right<00:04:45.840> now<00:04:46.000> but<00:04:46.160> i<00:04:46.240> feel<00:04:46.400> like

looks like right now but i feel like

looks like right now but i feel like
it's<00:04:47.040> oozing<00:04:47.600> over<00:04:47.840> these<00:04:48.080> 34s<00:04:48.720> that<00:04:48.800> don't

it's oozing over these 34s that don't

it's oozing over these 34s that don't
fit<00:04:49.199> anymore<00:04:49.520> i<00:04:49.600> just<00:04:49.759> called<00:04:49.919> it<00:04:50.080> a<00:04:50.160> midriff

fit anymore i just called it a midriff

fit anymore i just called it a midriff
like<00:04:50.720> i'm<00:04:50.800> one<00:04:50.960> of<00:04:51.040> the<00:04:51.120> supremes

like i'm one of the supremes

like i'm one of the supremes
there's<00:04:53.280> still<00:04:53.520> something<00:04:53.919> that<00:04:54.080> doesn't

there's still something that doesn't

there's still something that doesn't
have<00:04:54.479> to<00:04:54.639> do<00:04:54.800> with<00:04:54.960> sexuality<00:04:55.680> when<00:04:55.840> it<00:04:55.919> comes

have to do with sexuality when it comes

have to do with sexuality when it comes
to<00:04:56.320> being<00:04:56.560> oneself<00:04:57.199> in<00:04:57.280> new<00:04:57.520> york<00:04:57.759> city<00:04:58.560> you

to being oneself in new york city you

to being oneself in new york city you
know

know

know
if<00:04:59.600> my<00:04:59.840> hair<00:05:00.080> would<00:05:00.240> get<00:05:00.400> a<00:05:00.479> little<00:05:00.720> longer<00:05:01.039> in

if my hair would get a little longer in

if my hair would get a little longer in
comac<00:05:01.919> when<00:05:02.080> i<00:05:02.160> was<00:05:02.320> younger<00:05:02.639> i'd<00:05:02.800> walk<00:05:03.039> into

comac when i was younger i'd walk into

comac when i was younger i'd walk into
the<00:05:03.440> diner<00:05:03.840> and<00:05:04.000> everybody<00:05:04.400> would

the diner and everybody would

the diner and everybody would
everyone<00:05:05.600> turns<00:05:05.840> around<00:05:06.160> and<00:05:06.320> looks<00:05:06.880> you<00:05:07.039> know

everyone turns around and looks you know

everyone turns around and looks you know
you<00:05:07.440> see<00:05:07.759> bumper<00:05:08.080> stickers<00:05:08.400> there<00:05:08.639> like

you see bumper stickers there like

you see bumper stickers there like
hillary<00:05:09.280> go<00:05:09.600> home<00:05:10.240> you<00:05:10.320> know<00:05:10.639> incredibly

hillary go home you know incredibly

hillary go home you know incredibly
arrogant<00:05:12.960> and<00:05:13.600> racist<00:05:14.240> bumper<00:05:14.560> stickers<00:05:14.880> on

arrogant and racist bumper stickers on

arrogant and racist bumper stickers on
obama<00:05:15.680> it's<00:05:15.840> angry

obama it's angry

obama it's angry
being<00:05:18.400> myself<00:05:19.039> in<00:05:19.120> that<00:05:19.440> sense<00:05:19.840> would<00:05:20.000> be<00:05:20.240> like

being myself in that sense would be like

being myself in that sense would be like
you<00:05:20.560> know<00:05:20.800> spitting<00:05:21.199> at<00:05:21.280> somebody<00:05:21.759> or

you know spitting at somebody or

you know spitting at somebody or
shooting<00:05:22.320> at<00:05:22.479> them

shooting at them

shooting at them
you<00:05:24.320> know<00:05:24.479> and<00:05:24.639> when<00:05:24.800> i<00:05:24.880> was<00:05:25.039> in<00:05:25.199> ohio<00:05:25.680> a<00:05:25.759> few

you know and when i was in ohio a few

you know and when i was in ohio a few
weeks<00:05:26.240> ago<00:05:26.479> i<00:05:26.720> you<00:05:26.880> know

weeks ago i you know

weeks ago i you know
it<00:05:27.919> was<00:05:28.240> a<00:05:28.320> lot<00:05:28.479> of<00:05:28.560> like<00:05:28.800> what<00:05:29.120> are<00:05:29.280> you<00:05:29.680> what

it was a lot of like what are you what

it was a lot of like what are you what
are<00:05:30.240> you<00:05:30.560> what<00:05:30.800> are<00:05:31.039> you<00:05:31.199> know<00:05:31.440> so<00:05:31.680> i<00:05:31.759> don't<00:05:31.919> get

are you what are you know so i don't get

are you what are you know so i don't get
that<00:05:32.320> here<00:05:32.560> in<00:05:32.639> new<00:05:32.800> york<00:05:33.199> i<00:05:33.280> would<00:05:33.520> identify

that here in new york i would identify

that here in new york i would identify
as<00:05:34.320> a

as a

as a
black<00:05:35.520> woman<00:05:36.000> i<00:05:36.160> would<00:05:36.320> say

black woman i would say

black woman i would say
comic<00:05:38.720> um<00:05:39.360> humorous

comic um humorous

comic um humorous
overall<00:05:41.039> funny<00:05:41.280> gal

overall funny gal

overall funny gal
i'm<00:05:42.240> white<00:05:42.479> enough<00:05:42.720> that<00:05:42.800> i<00:05:42.880> never<00:05:43.120> worried

i'm white enough that i never worried

i'm white enough that i never worried
about<00:05:43.600> sickle<00:05:43.919> cell<00:05:44.080> anemia

about sickle cell anemia

about sickle cell anemia
but<00:05:46.560> i'm<00:05:46.639> not<00:05:46.800> wide<00:05:47.120> enough<00:05:47.280> to<00:05:47.440> get<00:05:47.680> the

but i'm not wide enough to get the

but i'm not wide enough to get the
office

producers and bookers they can be a

producers and bookers they can be a
little

little

little
myopic<00:05:56.639> in<00:05:56.800> what<00:05:57.039> they<00:05:57.280> think<00:05:57.680> that<00:05:58.080> an

myopic in what they think that an

myopic in what they think that an
audience<00:05:58.639> wants<00:05:58.960> to<00:05:59.120> look<00:05:59.360> at

audience wants to look at

audience wants to look at
and<00:06:00.319> so

and so

and so
you<00:06:01.360> know<00:06:01.520> they<00:06:01.680> might<00:06:01.919> think<00:06:02.240> oh<00:06:02.560> well<00:06:03.280> um

you know they might think oh well um

you know they might think oh well um
you're you're<00:06:05.759> a<00:06:05.919> black<00:06:06.160> woman<00:06:06.479> but<00:06:06.720> i'm<00:06:06.880> not

you're you're a black woman but i'm not

you're you're a black woman but i'm not
urban<00:06:08.000> so<00:06:08.160> like<00:06:08.319> i<00:06:08.400> don't<00:06:08.560> really<00:06:08.800> get<00:06:08.960> booked

urban so like i don't really get booked

urban so like i don't really get booked
on<00:06:09.280> that<00:06:09.440> many<00:06:09.759> like<00:06:09.919> urban<00:06:10.400> rooms<00:06:10.800> which<00:06:11.039> is

on that many like urban rooms which is

on that many like urban rooms which is
translation<00:06:12.080> and<00:06:12.319> industry<00:06:12.720> for<00:06:12.880> being<00:06:13.120> black

translation and industry for being black

translation and industry for being black
rooms<00:06:14.160> i'm<00:06:14.400> not<00:06:14.720> a<00:06:14.960> male<00:06:15.600> so<00:06:15.840> i<00:06:15.919> don't<00:06:16.080> get

rooms i'm not a male so i don't get

rooms i'm not a male so i don't get
booked<00:06:16.639> on<00:06:16.720> like<00:06:16.880> the<00:06:16.960> bro<00:06:17.280> shows<00:06:17.919> actually

booked on like the bro shows actually

booked on like the bro shows actually
the<00:06:18.319> first<00:06:18.479> time<00:06:18.639> i<00:06:18.800> ever<00:06:18.960> headlined<00:06:19.440> was<00:06:19.600> in<00:06:19.919> a

the first time i ever headlined was in a

the first time i ever headlined was in a
a<00:06:20.880> gay<00:06:21.120> bar<00:06:21.759> but<00:06:21.919> then<00:06:22.240> i<00:06:22.479> have<00:06:23.039> uh<00:06:23.520> people<00:06:23.759> that

a gay bar but then i have uh people that

a gay bar but then i have uh people that
are<00:06:24.000> like<00:06:24.240> oh<00:06:24.479> we<00:06:24.720> can't<00:06:25.440> we<00:06:25.600> can't<00:06:25.840> book<00:06:26.000> you

are like oh we can't we can't book you

are like oh we can't we can't book you
in<00:06:26.319> a<00:06:26.400> gay<00:06:26.560> room<00:06:26.800> because<00:06:27.039> you're<00:06:27.199> straight

in a gay room because you're straight

in a gay room because you're straight
and<00:06:28.080> i'm<00:06:28.160> just<00:06:28.319> like<00:06:28.800> uh

and i'm just like uh

and i'm just like uh
i'm<00:06:30.000> a<00:06:30.080> black<00:06:30.319> woman<00:06:30.639> i'm<00:06:30.800> like<00:06:31.039> a<00:06:31.120> gay<00:06:31.360> guy's

i'm a black woman i'm like a gay guy's

i'm a black woman i'm like a gay guy's
like<00:06:31.919> power<00:06:32.240> animal<00:06:32.560> like<00:06:33.039> you<00:06:33.120> know<00:06:33.360> it's

like power animal like you know it's

like power animal like you know it's
just<00:06:33.600> like<00:06:33.680> what<00:06:33.840> are<00:06:33.919> you<00:06:34.000> talking<00:06:34.240> about<00:06:34.479> you

just like what are you talking about you

just like what are you talking about you
can't<00:06:34.720> book<00:06:34.880> me<00:06:35.039> in<00:06:35.199> a<00:06:35.520> gay<00:06:35.759> room<00:06:36.400> but<00:06:36.720> i<00:06:36.800> think

can't book me in a gay room but i think

can't book me in a gay room but i think
it's<00:06:37.199> just<00:06:37.440> kind<00:06:37.680> of

it's just kind of

it's just kind of
they<00:06:38.880> have<00:06:39.120> their<00:06:39.759> own<00:06:40.000> idea<00:06:40.319> of<00:06:40.479> what<00:06:40.720> they

they have their own idea of what they

they have their own idea of what they
think<00:06:41.120> an<00:06:41.280> audience<00:06:41.680> wants<00:06:41.919> to<00:06:42.160> see<00:06:42.400> as

think an audience wants to see as

think an audience wants to see as
opposed<00:06:43.039> to<00:06:43.440> looking<00:06:43.840> at<00:06:44.000> it<00:06:44.160> as

opposed to looking at it as

opposed to looking at it as
your<00:06:45.680> audience<00:06:46.240> is<00:06:46.479> a<00:06:46.840> microcosm<00:06:47.840> of<00:06:48.000> new<00:06:48.160> york

your audience is a microcosm of new york

your audience is a microcosm of new york
city<00:06:48.720> we're<00:06:48.880> in<00:06:49.039> new<00:06:49.199> york<00:06:49.440> city<00:06:49.919> it's<00:06:50.080> the

city we're in new york city it's the

city we're in new york city it's the
most<00:06:50.319> diverse<00:06:50.720> city<00:06:50.960> in<00:06:51.039> the<00:06:51.120> world<00:06:51.759> so<00:06:52.240> your

most diverse city in the world so your

most diverse city in the world so your
lineup<00:06:52.960> should<00:06:53.120> be<00:06:53.360> the<00:06:53.520> most<00:06:53.919> diverse<00:06:54.479> lineup

lineup should be the most diverse lineup

lineup should be the most diverse lineup
in<00:06:54.880> the<00:06:54.960> world<00:06:55.199> as<00:06:55.360> far<00:06:55.520> as<00:06:55.680> i'm<00:06:55.919> concerned

in the world as far as i'm concerned

in the world as far as i'm concerned
tom<00:06:57.840> cruise<00:06:58.240> scares<00:06:58.720> me

tom cruise scares me

tom cruise scares me
how<00:07:00.800> about<00:07:01.280> you

how about you

how about you
you<00:07:03.199> shouldn't<00:07:03.599> be<00:07:03.919> that<00:07:04.240> scary

you shouldn't be that scary

you shouldn't be that scary
he's<00:07:06.319> only<00:07:06.639> five<00:07:06.960> foot<00:07:07.360> two<00:07:08.000> my<00:07:08.160> name<00:07:08.400> is<00:07:08.479> david

he's only five foot two my name is david

he's only five foot two my name is david
dippolito

dippolito

dippolito
um<00:07:10.479> but<00:07:10.639> i<00:07:10.800> identify<00:07:11.199> myself<00:07:11.680> this<00:07:11.840> way

um but i identify myself this way

um but i identify myself this way
i'm<00:07:14.240> pretty<00:07:14.479> sure<00:07:14.720> i'm<00:07:14.880> a<00:07:14.960> spirit

i'm pretty sure i'm a spirit

i'm pretty sure i'm a spirit
don't<00:07:16.880> think<00:07:17.039> it<00:07:17.120> has<00:07:17.280> any<00:07:17.440> genitals<00:07:18.000> i'm<00:07:18.160> a

don't think it has any genitals i'm a

don't think it has any genitals i'm a
spirit

spirit

spirit
who<00:07:20.000> happens<00:07:20.319> to<00:07:20.400> be<00:07:20.560> having<00:07:20.880> this<00:07:21.039> human

who happens to be having this human

who happens to be having this human
experience

experience

experience
this<00:07:23.280> time<00:07:23.520> around

this time around

this time around
it's<00:07:24.639> a<00:07:24.800> male<00:07:25.120> human<00:07:25.440> experience

it's a male human experience

it's a male human experience
this<00:07:28.000> male<00:07:28.240> human

this male human

this male human
happened<00:07:29.520> to<00:07:29.599> be<00:07:29.759> born

happened to be born

happened to be born
in<00:07:30.720> new<00:07:30.880> york<00:07:31.199> city

in new york city

in new york city
being<00:07:32.240> that<00:07:32.400> guitar<00:07:32.720> man<00:07:32.960> from<00:07:33.120> central<00:07:33.520> park

being that guitar man from central park

being that guitar man from central park
now

now

now
that<00:07:35.759> was<00:07:36.000> um

that was um

that was um
a<00:07:37.360> perfectly<00:07:38.080> practical<00:07:38.800> explainable

a perfectly practical explainable

a perfectly practical explainable
miracle

miracle

miracle
um<00:07:43.919> and<00:07:44.400> i<00:07:44.560> don't<00:07:44.720> use<00:07:44.879> that<00:07:44.960> word<00:07:45.199> lightly<00:07:45.599> but

um and i don't use that word lightly but

um and i don't use that word lightly but
that's<00:07:46.319> coming<00:07:46.639> from<00:07:46.800> maybe<00:07:47.199> the<00:07:47.360> least

that's coming from maybe the least

that's coming from maybe the least
religious<00:07:48.080> man<00:07:48.319> you<00:07:48.400> will<00:07:48.560> ever<00:07:48.800> meet<00:07:49.280> 25

religious man you will ever meet 25

religious man you will ever meet 25
years<00:07:50.000> ago

years ago

years ago
i<00:07:51.199> thought<00:07:51.440> of<00:07:51.599> myself<00:07:52.160> as<00:07:52.720> a<00:07:52.960> complete

i thought of myself as a complete

i thought of myself as a complete
failure<00:07:54.160> as<00:07:54.319> a<00:07:54.400> human<00:07:54.720> being<00:07:55.120> and<00:07:55.280> i<00:07:55.360> mean<00:07:55.520> that

failure as a human being and i mean that

failure as a human being and i mean that
um<00:07:56.240> a<00:07:56.400> failure<00:07:56.720> in<00:07:56.879> every<00:07:56.960> way<00:07:57.199> you<00:07:57.280> could

um a failure in every way you could

um a failure in every way you could
possibly<00:07:58.240> be

possibly be

possibly be
a<00:07:59.280> fraud<00:07:59.840> a<00:08:00.000> phony<00:08:00.560> in<00:08:00.639> my<00:08:00.800> own<00:08:01.039> eyes<00:08:01.440> and

a fraud a phony in my own eyes and

a fraud a phony in my own eyes and
probably<00:08:02.080> other<00:08:02.240> people's<00:08:02.560> eyes<00:08:03.039> a<00:08:03.199> failure<00:08:03.599> a

probably other people's eyes a failure a

probably other people's eyes a failure a
liar

liar

liar
um

um

um
i<00:08:05.840> was<00:08:06.000> a<00:08:06.160> drunk<00:08:06.879> and<00:08:07.039> i<00:08:07.120> was<00:08:07.280> trying<00:08:07.440> to<00:08:07.520> do<00:08:07.680> my

i was a drunk and i was trying to do my

i was a drunk and i was trying to do my
body<00:08:08.080> weight<00:08:08.240> in<00:08:08.400> cocaine<00:08:08.879> when<00:08:09.120> that<00:08:09.280> all

body weight in cocaine when that all

body weight in cocaine when that all
changed<00:08:10.560> for<00:08:10.720> the<00:08:10.879> first<00:08:11.120> time<00:08:11.360> in<00:08:11.440> my<00:08:11.680> life

you know i don't have to pretend to be

you know i don't have to pretend to be
anything<00:08:16.000> other<00:08:16.160> than<00:08:16.479> what<00:08:16.639> i<00:08:16.800> am<00:08:17.039> when

anything other than what i am when

anything other than what i am when
somebody<00:08:17.520> says<00:08:18.000> hey<00:08:18.240> i<00:08:18.319> love<00:08:18.479> the<00:08:18.560> song<00:08:18.879> crazy

somebody says hey i love the song crazy

somebody says hey i love the song crazy
on<00:08:19.440> the<00:08:19.520> same<00:08:19.759> day<00:08:20.319> or<00:08:20.800> the<00:08:21.039> song<00:08:21.360> tom<00:08:21.599> cruise

on the same day or the song tom cruise

on the same day or the song tom cruise
scares<00:08:22.160> me<00:08:22.319> that's<00:08:22.479> hysterical<00:08:23.039> that's<00:08:23.280> a

scares me that's hysterical that's a

scares me that's hysterical that's a
great<00:08:23.599> song<00:08:24.319> i<00:08:24.400> don't<00:08:24.560> have<00:08:24.639> to<00:08:24.800> say<00:08:25.039> no<00:08:25.280> no

great song i don't have to say no no

great song i don't have to say no no
it's<00:08:25.599> not<00:08:25.759> no<00:08:25.919> it's<00:08:26.000> not<00:08:26.240> i<00:08:26.319> could<00:08:26.400> say<00:08:26.560> yeah<00:08:26.720> it

it's not no it's not i could say yeah it

it's not no it's not i could say yeah it
is<00:08:27.039> isn't<00:08:27.280> it<00:08:27.440> and<00:08:27.599> i<00:08:27.680> can<00:08:27.840> say<00:08:28.000> it<00:08:28.080> with

is isn't it and i can say it with

is isn't it and i can say it with
genuine<00:08:28.720> humility<00:08:29.520> if<00:08:29.599> somebody<00:08:30.000> says<00:08:30.240> to<00:08:30.319> me

genuine humility if somebody says to me

genuine humility if somebody says to me
david<00:08:31.360> you're<00:08:31.520> a<00:08:31.599> nice<00:08:31.919> guy

david you're a nice guy

david you're a nice guy
i<00:08:32.880> can<00:08:33.039> say<00:08:33.519> yeah<00:08:34.000> most<00:08:34.320> days

i can say yeah most days

i can say yeah most days
david<00:08:35.760> you're<00:08:35.919> a<00:08:36.000> good<00:08:36.240> person<00:08:37.120> yeah<00:08:37.279> i'm

david you're a good person yeah i'm

david you're a good person yeah i'm
trying<00:08:37.760> to<00:08:37.919> be<00:08:38.560> and<00:08:38.719> i<00:08:38.800> can<00:08:38.880> say<00:08:39.039> it<00:08:39.120> with

trying to be and i can say it with

trying to be and i can say it with
genuine<00:08:39.760> humility<00:08:40.320> because<00:08:40.479> i<00:08:40.560> don't<00:08:40.800> pretend

genuine humility because i don't pretend

genuine humility because i don't pretend
to<00:08:41.200> be<00:08:41.360> something<00:08:41.599> i'm<00:08:41.760> not<00:08:42.240> i<00:08:42.479> also<00:08:42.719> don't

to be something i'm not i also don't

to be something i'm not i also don't
pretend<00:08:43.760> not<00:08:44.000> to<00:08:44.159> be<00:08:44.399> something<00:08:44.800> i<00:08:44.959> am<00:08:45.519> i

pretend not to be something i am i

pretend not to be something i am i
identify<00:08:46.800> as<00:08:47.279> a

identify as a

identify as a
bisexual<00:08:49.120> woman<00:08:49.680> queer<00:08:50.000> woman

bisexual woman queer woman

bisexual woman queer woman
an<00:08:52.160> artist

an artist

an artist
a<00:08:53.839> jew

a jew

a jew
a<00:08:55.600> voice-over<00:08:56.399> actor

a voice-over actor

a voice-over actor
and<00:08:57.920> uh<00:08:58.640> kind<00:08:58.800> of<00:08:58.959> a<00:08:59.040> weirdo<00:08:59.760> kind<00:08:59.920> of<00:09:00.000> like<00:09:00.160> a

and uh kind of a weirdo kind of like a

and uh kind of a weirdo kind of like a
kind<00:09:00.560> of<00:09:00.640> like<00:09:00.800> a<00:09:00.880> fun<00:09:01.120> weirdo

kind of like a fun weirdo

kind of like a fun weirdo
being<00:09:03.360> a<00:09:03.680> bisexual<00:09:04.399> so<00:09:04.560> i've<00:09:04.959> i've<00:09:05.360> known<00:09:06.160> uh

being a bisexual so i've i've known uh

being a bisexual so i've i've known uh
i've<00:09:06.800> known<00:09:07.040> that<00:09:07.120> i<00:09:07.200> was<00:09:07.360> queer<00:09:07.600> pretty<00:09:07.839> much

i've known that i was queer pretty much

i've known that i was queer pretty much
my<00:09:08.240> entire<00:09:08.640> life

my entire life

my entire life
um<00:09:10.160> i<00:09:10.399> came<00:09:10.640> out<00:09:10.800> formally<00:09:11.200> when<00:09:11.360> i<00:09:11.440> was<00:09:11.600> 18<00:09:12.000> my

um i came out formally when i was 18 my

um i came out formally when i was 18 my
freshman<00:09:12.560> year<00:09:12.720> of<00:09:12.880> college

freshman year of college

freshman year of college
i<00:09:14.320> just<00:09:14.480> remember<00:09:14.800> feeling<00:09:15.120> so<00:09:15.279> relieved

i just remember feeling so relieved

i just remember feeling so relieved
spending<00:09:17.600> all<00:09:17.839> of<00:09:18.080> high<00:09:18.240> school<00:09:18.640> feeling<00:09:19.200> like

spending all of high school feeling like

spending all of high school feeling like
there<00:09:19.519> was<00:09:19.680> something<00:09:20.399> just<00:09:20.720> really<00:09:21.040> really

there was something just really really

there was something just really really
wrong<00:09:21.760> with<00:09:22.000> me<00:09:22.240> because

wrong with me because

wrong with me because
i<00:09:24.160> felt<00:09:24.320> like<00:09:24.399> i<00:09:24.480> had<00:09:24.640> to<00:09:24.720> be<00:09:24.880> either<00:09:25.120> one<00:09:25.279> or

i felt like i had to be either one or

i felt like i had to be either one or
the<00:09:25.519> other<00:09:26.160> we<00:09:26.320> do<00:09:26.480> very<00:09:26.720> much<00:09:27.040> live<00:09:27.440> in<00:09:27.680> a

the other we do very much live in a

the other we do very much live in a
society<00:09:28.640> that<00:09:28.880> is<00:09:29.360> obsessed<00:09:29.839> with<00:09:30.080> binaries

society that is obsessed with binaries

society that is obsessed with binaries
there's<00:09:31.040> not<00:09:31.200> a<00:09:31.279> whole<00:09:31.360> lot<00:09:31.519> of<00:09:31.600> room<00:09:31.920> for<00:09:32.560> a

there's not a whole lot of room for a

there's not a whole lot of room for a
spectrum

spectrum

spectrum
in<00:09:34.800> the<00:09:34.880> world<00:09:35.120> that<00:09:35.200> we<00:09:35.360> live<00:09:35.519> in<00:09:35.839> so

in the world that we live in so

in the world that we live in so
i<00:09:37.360> always<00:09:37.600> kind<00:09:37.760> of<00:09:37.839> felt<00:09:38.080> like<00:09:38.160> if<00:09:38.320> i<00:09:38.560> if<00:09:38.720> i<00:09:38.800> was

i always kind of felt like if i if i was

i always kind of felt like if i if i was
into<00:09:39.200> women<00:09:39.440> then<00:09:39.519> that<00:09:39.680> had<00:09:39.839> to<00:09:40.000> mean<00:09:40.160> that<00:09:40.320> i

into women then that had to mean that i

into women then that had to mean that i
was<00:09:40.560> a<00:09:40.640> lesbian<00:09:41.120> but<00:09:41.360> i<00:09:41.519> knew<00:09:41.760> i<00:09:41.839> was<00:09:42.000> into<00:09:42.240> men

was a lesbian but i knew i was into men

was a lesbian but i knew i was into men
too<00:09:42.959> so

too so

too so
i<00:09:44.160> had<00:09:44.320> to<00:09:44.480> be<00:09:44.640> straight

i had to be straight

i had to be straight
so<00:09:45.839> i've<00:09:46.080> been<00:09:46.399> in<00:09:46.720> a<00:09:47.200> heterosexual

so i've been in a heterosexual

so i've been in a heterosexual
relationship<00:09:48.480> now<00:09:48.720> for<00:09:49.040> four<00:09:49.360> years<00:09:50.000> and<00:09:50.320> a

relationship now for four years and a

relationship now for four years and a
lot<00:09:50.560> of<00:09:50.720> folks

lot of folks

lot of folks
when<00:09:52.000> they<00:09:52.080> find<00:09:52.320> out<00:09:52.480> that<00:09:52.640> i'm<00:09:52.800> queer<00:09:53.440> uh

when they find out that i'm queer uh

when they find out that i'm queer uh
don't<00:09:54.480> really<00:09:54.720> understand<00:09:55.200> how<00:09:55.360> that<00:09:55.519> can

don't really understand how that can

don't really understand how that can
work

work

work
a<00:09:56.720> question<00:09:56.959> that<00:09:57.120> i<00:09:57.200> get<00:09:57.360> a<00:09:57.360> lot<00:09:57.519> of<00:09:57.600> the<00:09:57.680> time

a question that i get a lot of the time

a question that i get a lot of the time
is<00:09:58.080> like<00:09:58.320> but

is like but

is like but
so<00:09:59.440> does<00:09:59.600> that<00:09:59.680> mean<00:09:59.839> you<00:10:00.000> had<00:10:00.160> to<00:10:00.320> choose<00:10:00.800> like

so does that mean you had to choose like

so does that mean you had to choose like
so<00:10:01.200> you<00:10:01.440> chose<00:10:01.920> men<00:10:02.320> right<00:10:02.640> like<00:10:02.880> and<00:10:02.959> that's

so you chose men right like and that's

so you chose men right like and that's
not

not

not
that's<00:10:04.640> not<00:10:04.800> what<00:10:05.040> that's<00:10:05.279> not<00:10:05.440> what<00:10:05.519> being

that's not what that's not what being

that's not what that's not what being
bisexual<00:10:06.240> means<00:10:06.480> that's<00:10:06.640> not<00:10:06.720> how<00:10:06.880> that<00:10:07.040> works

bisexual means that's not how that works

bisexual means that's not how that works
i<00:10:08.000> use<00:10:08.160> the<00:10:08.240> labels<00:10:08.800> bisexual<00:10:09.440> and<00:10:09.600> queer<00:10:09.839> kind

i use the labels bisexual and queer kind

i use the labels bisexual and queer kind
of<00:10:10.160> interchangeably<00:10:10.720> depending<00:10:11.040> on<00:10:11.120> the

of interchangeably depending on the

of interchangeably depending on the
company<00:10:11.600> that<00:10:11.760> i'm<00:10:11.920> in<00:10:12.320> so<00:10:12.959> to<00:10:13.120> my<00:10:13.279> family<00:10:13.680> when

company that i'm in so to my family when

company that i'm in so to my family when
i<00:10:13.920> came<00:10:14.160> out<00:10:14.240> to<00:10:14.320> them<00:10:14.560> the<00:10:14.720> easiest<00:10:15.040> way<00:10:15.200> for

i came out to them the easiest way for

i came out to them the easiest way for
me<00:10:15.519> to<00:10:15.680> explain<00:10:16.079> my<00:10:16.240> sexuality<00:10:16.959> was<00:10:17.200> to<00:10:17.360> say

me to explain my sexuality was to say

me to explain my sexuality was to say
i'm<00:10:18.240> bisexual

i'm bisexual

i'm bisexual
um<00:10:20.240> because<00:10:20.480> they<00:10:20.720> understand<00:10:21.120> that<00:10:21.279> means

um because they understand that means

um because they understand that means
men<00:10:22.000> and<00:10:22.160> women<00:10:22.640> but<00:10:22.880> in<00:10:23.040> reality<00:10:23.680> i<00:10:23.760> think

men and women but in reality i think

men and women but in reality i think
gender<00:10:24.320> much<00:10:24.560> like<00:10:24.720> sexuality<00:10:25.279> exists<00:10:25.600> on<00:10:25.680> a

gender much like sexuality exists on a

gender much like sexuality exists on a
continuum<00:10:26.720> and<00:10:26.880> to<00:10:27.040> say<00:10:27.200> that<00:10:27.360> i'm<00:10:27.519> only

continuum and to say that i'm only

continuum and to say that i'm only
attracted<00:10:28.160> to<00:10:28.320> men<00:10:28.640> and<00:10:29.040> attracted<00:10:29.440> to<00:10:29.519> women

attracted to men and attracted to women

attracted to men and attracted to women
would<00:10:30.000> be

would be

would be
it's<00:10:31.519> just<00:10:31.680> kind<00:10:31.920> of<00:10:32.320> it's<00:10:32.480> not<00:10:32.720> entirely

it's just kind of it's not entirely

it's just kind of it's not entirely
accurate<00:10:33.600> there's<00:10:33.760> a<00:10:33.839> lot<00:10:34.160> in<00:10:34.240> between<00:10:34.720> that

accurate there's a lot in between that

accurate there's a lot in between that
which

which

which
falls<00:10:36.160> into<00:10:36.320> the<00:10:36.399> realm<00:10:36.640> of<00:10:36.720> my<00:10:36.880> attraction<00:10:37.360> as

falls into the realm of my attraction as

falls into the realm of my attraction as
well

well

well
so<00:10:38.640> queer<00:10:39.040> is<00:10:39.120> kind<00:10:39.279> of<00:10:39.440> the<00:10:39.519> easiest<00:10:40.000> umbrella

so queer is kind of the easiest umbrella

so queer is kind of the easiest umbrella
term<00:10:40.640> for<00:10:40.800> me<00:10:40.959> to<00:10:41.040> just<00:10:41.200> say<00:10:41.519> i<00:10:41.680> am<00:10:41.839> not

term for me to just say i am not

term for me to just say i am not
straight<00:10:43.279> i<00:10:43.440> am<00:10:43.600> something<00:10:43.920> other<00:10:44.160> than

straight i am something other than

straight i am something other than
straight

straight

straight
and<00:10:45.920> it<00:10:46.079> really<00:10:46.240> just<00:10:46.399> depends<00:10:46.720> on<00:10:46.800> who<00:10:47.040> i'm

and it really just depends on who i'm

and it really just depends on who i'm
with<00:10:47.440> for<00:10:47.600> what<00:10:47.760> label<00:10:48.079> i<00:10:48.160> will<00:10:48.320> use<00:10:48.880> my

with for what label i will use my

with for what label i will use my
freshman<00:10:49.360> year<00:10:49.600> of<00:10:49.680> college<00:10:50.079> i<00:10:50.240> was<00:10:50.560> in<00:10:50.640> new

freshman year of college i was in new

freshman year of college i was in new
jersey<00:10:51.279> and<00:10:51.360> i<00:10:51.440> felt<00:10:51.839> completely

jersey and i felt completely

jersey and i felt completely
freed<00:10:53.760> from<00:10:54.000> these

freed from these

freed from these
shackles<00:10:56.560> of<00:10:56.640> just<00:10:56.880> having<00:10:57.200> to<00:10:57.440> pretend<00:10:57.839> that

shackles of just having to pretend that

shackles of just having to pretend that
i<00:10:58.000> was<00:10:58.079> something<00:10:58.399> i<00:10:58.480> wasn't<00:10:58.959> in<00:10:59.279> a<00:10:59.440> town<00:10:59.680> that

i was something i wasn't in a town that

i was something i wasn't in a town that
i<00:10:59.920> didn't<00:11:00.079> think<00:11:00.240> people<00:11:00.399> would<00:11:00.560> understand

i didn't think people would understand

i didn't think people would understand
me<00:11:01.200> and<00:11:01.279> so<00:11:01.440> moving<00:11:01.680> to<00:11:01.760> new<00:11:01.920> york<00:11:02.240> felt<00:11:02.480> like

me and so moving to new york felt like

me and so moving to new york felt like
the<00:11:02.720> most<00:11:03.040> obvious<00:11:03.519> choice<00:11:03.839> i<00:11:03.920> mean<00:11:04.079> there's

the most obvious choice i mean there's

the most obvious choice i mean there's
such<00:11:04.720> a<00:11:04.959> thriving

such a thriving

such a thriving
gay<00:11:06.560> community<00:11:07.040> here<00:11:07.360> and<00:11:07.920> i<00:11:08.079> actually

gay community here and i actually

gay community here and i actually
remember<00:11:08.640> my<00:11:08.800> first<00:11:09.200> pride<00:11:09.600> in<00:11:09.680> new<00:11:09.839> york

remember my first pride in new york

remember my first pride in new york
really<00:11:10.399> vividly<00:11:10.800> i<00:11:10.880> just<00:11:11.040> remember<00:11:11.360> like

really vividly i just remember like

really vividly i just remember like
looking<00:11:11.839> around<00:11:12.160> at<00:11:12.320> the<00:11:12.399> pride<00:11:12.640> parade<00:11:12.959> and

looking around at the pride parade and

looking around at the pride parade and
just<00:11:13.200> being<00:11:13.440> like

just being like

just being like
i<00:11:14.480> can't<00:11:14.640> believe<00:11:15.040> it<00:11:15.120> they're<00:11:15.360> everywhere

i can't believe it they're everywhere

i can't believe it they're everywhere
they're<00:11:16.560> everywhere

they're everywhere

they're everywhere
this<00:11:18.079> is<00:11:18.160> a<00:11:18.240> really<00:11:18.560> good<00:11:18.800> feeling<00:11:19.440> i<00:11:19.760> i<00:11:19.920> felt

this is a really good feeling i i felt

this is a really good feeling i i felt
like<00:11:20.240> i<00:11:20.320> was<00:11:20.480> maybe<00:11:20.800> on<00:11:20.880> the<00:11:21.279> on<00:11:21.360> the<00:11:21.519> road<00:11:21.760> to

like i was maybe on the on the road to

like i was maybe on the on the road to
finding<00:11:22.240> my<00:11:22.399> people<00:11:23.120> a<00:11:23.279> little<00:11:23.440> bit

finding my people a little bit

finding my people a little bit
a<00:11:24.560> male

a male

a male
a<00:11:26.240> gay<00:11:26.480> male

a gay male

a gay male
i'm<00:11:27.519> almost<00:11:27.760> going<00:11:28.000> on<00:11:28.160> four<00:11:28.399> years<00:11:28.720> here<00:11:29.040> in

i'm almost going on four years here in

i'm almost going on four years here in
new<00:11:29.440> york<00:11:29.760> city<00:11:30.480> i<00:11:30.640> moved<00:11:30.880> here

new york city i moved here

new york city i moved here
four<00:11:32.560> thanksgivings<00:11:33.279> ago

four thanksgivings ago

four thanksgivings ago
just<00:11:34.720> packed<00:11:35.040> up<00:11:35.600> and<00:11:35.760> left<00:11:36.079> the<00:11:36.240> south

just packed up and left the south

just packed up and left the south
and<00:11:37.519> made<00:11:37.839> way<00:11:38.079> for<00:11:38.240> a<00:11:38.320> better<00:11:38.640> place<00:11:39.360> even<00:11:39.600> now

and made way for a better place even now

and made way for a better place even now
when<00:11:40.000> i<00:11:40.079> go<00:11:40.320> home<00:11:40.959> i<00:11:41.680> still<00:11:42.560> feel<00:11:42.720> like<00:11:42.880> i<00:11:43.040> put

when i go home i still feel like i put

when i go home i still feel like i put
on<00:11:43.440> a<00:11:43.519> little<00:11:43.760> bit<00:11:43.839> of<00:11:44.000> a<00:11:44.160> facade<00:11:44.800> of<00:11:45.440> maybe

on a little bit of a facade of maybe

on a little bit of a facade of maybe
lowering<00:11:46.240> my<00:11:46.560> voice<00:11:47.440> or<00:11:48.160> keeping<00:11:48.480> my<00:11:48.640> hands

lowering my voice or keeping my hands

lowering my voice or keeping my hands
closer<00:11:49.680> to<00:11:49.839> myself<00:11:50.560> and<00:11:50.720> not<00:11:50.880> being<00:11:51.120> as

closer to myself and not being as

closer to myself and not being as
expressive<00:11:51.760> with<00:11:51.920> my<00:11:52.240> face

expressive with my face

expressive with my face
i<00:11:53.839> definitely<00:11:54.160> still<00:11:54.320> feel<00:11:54.480> like<00:11:54.639> when<00:11:54.720> i<00:11:54.880> go

i definitely still feel like when i go

i definitely still feel like when i go
home<00:11:55.200> i<00:11:55.360> have<00:11:55.600> to<00:11:56.079> revert<00:11:56.560> back<00:11:56.880> to

home i have to revert back to

home i have to revert back to
what<00:11:58.240> is<00:11:58.480> acceptable<00:11:59.519> i<00:11:59.680> remember<00:11:59.920> one<00:12:00.079> easter

what is acceptable i remember one easter

what is acceptable i remember one easter
i<00:12:00.560> had<00:12:00.720> this<00:12:00.959> really<00:12:01.360> great<00:12:01.600> outfit<00:12:02.160> and<00:12:02.399> it

i had this really great outfit and it

i had this really great outfit and it
was<00:12:02.560> like<00:12:02.800> green<00:12:03.040> suspenders<00:12:03.839> a<00:12:04.000> button<00:12:04.320> down

was like green suspenders a button down

was like green suspenders a button down
and<00:12:04.720> this<00:12:04.880> like<00:12:05.200> madras<00:12:05.680> tie<00:12:06.160> and<00:12:06.320> these<00:12:07.040> green

and this like madras tie and these green

and this like madras tie and these green
fitted<00:12:07.920> pants<00:12:08.639> and<00:12:08.800> my<00:12:08.959> mom<00:12:09.200> walks<00:12:09.440> in<00:12:09.600> the

fitted pants and my mom walks in the

fitted pants and my mom walks in the
bedroom<00:12:10.160> and<00:12:10.240> she<00:12:10.399> goes<00:12:10.880> absolutely<00:12:11.600> not

bedroom and she goes absolutely not

bedroom and she goes absolutely not
you've<00:12:12.160> got<00:12:12.399> to<00:12:12.560> change

you've got to change

you've got to change
and<00:12:13.680> that's<00:12:14.000> when<00:12:14.160> i<00:12:14.320> thought<00:12:14.720> man

and that's when i thought man

and that's when i thought man
even<00:12:16.320> though<00:12:16.560> i'm<00:12:16.720> gone<00:12:17.600> i'm<00:12:17.839> not<00:12:18.079> gone<00:12:18.480> then

even though i'm gone i'm not gone then

even though i'm gone i'm not gone then
when<00:12:18.800> i<00:12:18.880> moved<00:12:19.120> to<00:12:19.200> new<00:12:19.360> york<00:12:19.519> city<00:12:19.920> it<00:12:20.000> was

when i moved to new york city it was

when i moved to new york city it was
like<00:12:20.639> uh<00:12:21.360> your<00:12:21.600> best<00:12:21.839> friends<00:12:22.240> are<00:12:22.480> drag

like uh your best friends are drag

like uh your best friends are drag
queens<00:12:23.279> and<00:12:23.760> escorts<00:12:24.639> who<00:12:24.800> you<00:12:24.959> don't<00:12:25.120> ever

queens and escorts who you don't ever

queens and escorts who you don't ever
think<00:12:25.440> about<00:12:25.920> as<00:12:26.079> being<00:12:26.320> a<00:12:26.480> friend<00:12:26.720> you<00:12:26.800> would

think about as being a friend you would

think about as being a friend you would
have<00:12:27.200> back<00:12:27.440> in<00:12:27.839> mississippi<00:12:28.720> then<00:12:28.880> you<00:12:29.040> melt

have back in mississippi then you melt

have back in mississippi then you melt
in<00:12:29.519> and<00:12:29.680> i<00:12:29.760> feel<00:12:29.920> like<00:12:30.079> now<00:12:30.240> i'm<00:12:30.320> just<00:12:30.560> right<00:12:30.800> in

in and i feel like now i'm just right in

in and i feel like now i'm just right in
that<00:12:31.120> middle<00:12:31.680> spot

that middle spot

that middle spot
i<00:12:32.720> guess<00:12:32.959> i<00:12:33.120> would<00:12:33.279> identify<00:12:34.079> as<00:12:34.639> masculine

i guess i would identify as masculine

i guess i would identify as masculine
uh

uh

uh
funny<00:12:37.839> uh<00:12:38.160> feminine

funny uh feminine

funny uh feminine
um

um

um
witty

witty

witty
short

short

short
um

um

um
uh

uh

uh
shy

shy

shy
being<00:12:48.240> out<00:12:48.720> and<00:12:49.120> gay<00:12:49.519> and<00:12:49.760> jewish

being out and gay and jewish

being out and gay and jewish
for<00:12:51.040> me<00:12:51.360> is<00:12:51.519> a<00:12:51.600> little<00:12:51.760> bit<00:12:51.920> different<00:12:52.399> than

for me is a little bit different than

for me is a little bit different than
most<00:12:54.720> because

most because

most because
everyone<00:12:56.000> knows<00:12:56.320> me<00:12:56.560> from<00:12:57.279> my<00:12:57.600> porn<00:12:57.920> work

everyone knows me from my porn work

everyone knows me from my porn work
aside<00:12:59.200> from<00:12:59.600> mainstream<00:13:00.560> theater<00:13:00.880> and<00:13:01.120> acting

aside from mainstream theater and acting

aside from mainstream theater and acting
that<00:13:01.519> i've<00:13:01.600> done<00:13:01.839> over<00:13:02.000> the<00:13:02.079> years<00:13:02.800> i'm<00:13:03.440> known

that i've done over the years i'm known

that i've done over the years i'm known
for

for

for
a<00:13:04.880> lot<00:13:05.040> of<00:13:05.120> porn<00:13:05.440> that<00:13:05.519> i<00:13:05.600> did

a lot of porn that i did

a lot of porn that i did
when<00:13:06.639> you're<00:13:06.959> in<00:13:07.040> show<00:13:07.279> business<00:13:07.519> in<00:13:07.680> any

when you're in show business in any

when you're in show business in any
aspect<00:13:08.240> of<00:13:08.399> it<00:13:08.720> uh<00:13:09.040> people<00:13:09.360> put<00:13:09.519> you<00:13:09.839> in<00:13:10.079> this

aspect of it uh people put you in this

aspect of it uh people put you in this
uh<00:13:10.880> in<00:13:11.040> a<00:13:11.120> box<00:13:11.440> or<00:13:11.600> in<00:13:11.760> how<00:13:11.920> they<00:13:12.079> perceive<00:13:12.560> you

uh in a box or in how they perceive you

uh in a box or in how they perceive you
people<00:13:13.680> who<00:13:14.160> email<00:13:14.480> me<00:13:14.639> or<00:13:14.800> write<00:13:14.959> to<00:13:15.120> me<00:13:15.360> they

people who email me or write to me they

people who email me or write to me they
just<00:13:15.920> think<00:13:16.160> i'm<00:13:16.399> the<00:13:16.560> sexual<00:13:17.040> being<00:13:17.519> always

just think i'm the sexual being always

just think i'm the sexual being always
all<00:13:18.079> the<00:13:18.240> time<00:13:18.560> i'll<00:13:18.839> get<00:13:19.839> you<00:13:20.000> know<00:13:20.160> like

all the time i'll get you know like

all the time i'll get you know like
oh<00:13:21.519> i<00:13:21.600> wish<00:13:21.839> you<00:13:21.920> were<00:13:22.079> closer<00:13:22.560> random

oh i wish you were closer random

oh i wish you were closer random
messages<00:13:23.519> like<00:13:23.680> well<00:13:24.000> closer<00:13:24.480> to<00:13:24.800> what<00:13:24.959> the

messages like well closer to what the

messages like well closer to what the
moon<00:13:25.519> you<00:13:25.600> know<00:13:26.240> um

moon you know um

moon you know um
or

or

or
they'll<00:13:28.480> give<00:13:28.639> me<00:13:28.800> like<00:13:29.040> oh<00:13:29.200> i<00:13:29.279> was<00:13:29.440> thinking

they'll give me like oh i was thinking

they'll give me like oh i was thinking
about<00:13:29.839> you<00:13:30.000> today<00:13:30.800> wink<00:13:31.120> wink<00:13:31.600> you<00:13:31.680> know

about you today wink wink you know

about you today wink wink you know
things<00:13:32.800> like<00:13:32.959> that

things like that

things like that
but<00:13:34.720> not<00:13:34.959> so<00:13:35.200> much

but not so much

but not so much
asking<00:13:37.040> or<00:13:37.200> wondering<00:13:37.839> you<00:13:37.920> know<00:13:38.000> like<00:13:38.320> oh

asking or wondering you know like oh

asking or wondering you know like oh
what<00:13:38.639> do<00:13:38.720> you<00:13:38.880> do<00:13:39.360> for<00:13:39.680> you<00:13:39.760> know<00:13:40.079> your

what do you do for you know your

what do you do for you know your
everyday<00:13:40.800> life<00:13:41.120> you<00:13:41.199> know

everyday life you know

everyday life you know
nothing<00:13:42.800> nothing<00:13:43.440> authentic<00:13:44.079> or<00:13:44.320> or

normal it's usually sexual and i get it

normal it's usually sexual and i get it
i<00:13:49.600> get<00:13:49.680> where<00:13:49.839> they're<00:13:50.000> coming<00:13:50.240> from<00:13:50.480> but

i get where they're coming from but

i get where they're coming from but
that's<00:13:51.120> another<00:13:51.600> box<00:13:51.920> that

that's another box that

that's another box that
you're<00:13:53.120> stuck<00:13:53.440> in

you're stuck in

you're stuck in
i<00:13:54.320> think<00:13:54.480> that's<00:13:54.959> partly<00:13:55.360> why<00:13:55.920> um

i think that's partly why um

i think that's partly why um
i<00:13:57.680> stopped<00:13:58.000> doing<00:13:58.320> it

i stopped doing it

i stopped doing it
the<00:13:59.199> word<00:13:59.519> i<00:13:59.680> hated<00:14:00.000> the<00:14:00.240> most<00:14:00.560> though<00:14:00.880> growing

the word i hated the most though growing

the word i hated the most though growing
up<00:14:01.440> was<00:14:01.760> uh<00:14:02.160> half<00:14:02.480> breed

up was uh half breed

up was uh half breed
and<00:14:03.600> i<00:14:03.760> heard<00:14:03.920> that<00:14:04.160> a<00:14:04.240> lot<00:14:04.720> but<00:14:04.959> uh<00:14:05.519> i<00:14:05.600> think<00:14:05.839> i

and i heard that a lot but uh i think i

and i heard that a lot but uh i think i
came<00:14:06.079> to<00:14:06.240> terms<00:14:06.560> with<00:14:06.800> it<00:14:07.120> when<00:14:07.440> um<00:14:07.760> we<00:14:07.920> were

came to terms with it when um we were

came to terms with it when um we were
watching<00:14:08.320> the<00:14:08.399> sunny<00:14:08.800> and<00:14:08.959> cher<00:14:09.279> show

watching the sunny and cher show

watching the sunny and cher show
uh<00:14:10.639> one<00:14:10.880> time<00:14:11.120> and<00:14:11.360> cher<00:14:11.680> was<00:14:11.839> singing<00:14:12.160> half

uh one time and cher was singing half

uh one time and cher was singing half
read<00:14:12.720> and

read and

read and
i<00:14:13.680> just<00:14:14.000> like<00:14:14.240> looked<00:14:14.480> at<00:14:14.560> my<00:14:14.720> mom<00:14:14.959> and<00:14:15.120> she<00:14:15.279> was

i just like looked at my mom and she was

i just like looked at my mom and she was
like<00:14:15.760> you<00:14:15.920> see<00:14:16.399> you're<00:14:16.560> just<00:14:16.720> like<00:14:16.959> cher<00:14:17.279> so

like you see you're just like cher so

like you see you're just like cher so
um

um

um
i'm<00:14:19.440> like<00:14:19.600> sure

i'm like sure

i'm like sure
i<00:14:20.639> identify<00:14:21.519> as<00:14:22.240> a<00:14:22.399> human<00:14:22.800> being

i identify as a human being

i identify as a human being
i'm<00:14:24.079> a<00:14:24.160> man

i'm a man

i'm a man
but<00:14:25.600> i<00:14:26.160> don't<00:14:26.480> like<00:14:26.639> the<00:14:26.720> way<00:14:26.880> people<00:14:27.120> get<00:14:27.279> so

but i don't like the way people get so

but i don't like the way people get so
caught<00:14:27.760> up<00:14:28.000> in

caught up in

caught up in
what<00:14:29.680> that<00:14:29.920> means<00:14:30.399> how<00:14:30.639> i<00:14:30.720> identify<00:14:31.360> now<00:14:31.839> is

what that means how i identify now is

what that means how i identify now is
probably<00:14:33.040> mostly<00:14:33.760> similar<00:14:34.079> to<00:14:34.240> how<00:14:34.399> it<00:14:34.480> was

probably mostly similar to how it was

probably mostly similar to how it was
before<00:14:35.680> but<00:14:35.920> like<00:14:36.160> more<00:14:36.480> free<00:14:37.120> and<00:14:37.360> certainly

before but like more free and certainly

before but like more free and certainly
being<00:14:38.079> in<00:14:38.160> new<00:14:38.320> york<00:14:38.720> has<00:14:38.959> been<00:14:39.519> a<00:14:39.839> huge<00:14:40.480> part

being in new york has been a huge part

being in new york has been a huge part
of<00:14:40.800> that

of that

of that
i<00:14:42.160> came<00:14:42.399> here<00:14:42.639> to<00:14:42.800> pursue<00:14:43.279> theater<00:14:44.240> initially

i came here to pursue theater initially

i came here to pursue theater initially
five<00:14:45.040> years<00:14:45.279> ago<00:14:46.000> and<00:14:46.320> i<00:14:46.480> had<00:14:46.720> this<00:14:46.959> idea<00:14:47.519> of

five years ago and i had this idea of

five years ago and i had this idea of
who<00:14:48.079> i<00:14:48.240> needed<00:14:48.560> to<00:14:48.720> be<00:14:49.360> to<00:14:49.519> make<00:14:49.760> it<00:14:50.399> in<00:14:50.639> that

who i needed to be to make it in that

who i needed to be to make it in that
arena<00:14:51.920> and<00:14:52.079> i<00:14:52.240> very<00:14:52.480> quickly<00:14:52.880> realized<00:14:53.360> that

arena and i very quickly realized that

arena and i very quickly realized that
who<00:14:54.639> i<00:14:54.959> am<00:14:55.279> is<00:14:55.600> just<00:14:56.000> not<00:14:56.399> what<00:14:57.199> people<00:14:57.519> want<00:14:57.760> to

who i am is just not what people want to

who i am is just not what people want to
cast<00:14:58.320> on<00:14:58.480> the<00:14:58.560> regular

cast on the regular

cast on the regular
and<00:14:59.839> then<00:15:00.000> i<00:15:00.160> thought<00:15:00.399> why<00:15:00.560> do<00:15:00.800> i<00:15:00.959> keep

and then i thought why do i keep

and then i thought why do i keep
like<00:15:02.399> trying<00:15:02.639> to<00:15:02.959> fit<00:15:03.279> myself<00:15:03.760> into<00:15:04.000> this<00:15:04.240> mold

like trying to fit myself into this mold

like trying to fit myself into this mold
this<00:15:05.279> body<00:15:05.839> this<00:15:06.240> voice

this body this voice

this body this voice
and<00:15:08.000> then<00:15:08.160> i<00:15:08.240> started<00:15:08.480> hanging<00:15:08.639> out<00:15:08.800> with<00:15:08.880> drag

and then i started hanging out with drag

and then i started hanging out with drag
queens<00:15:09.600> honestly<00:15:10.160> and<00:15:10.320> that<00:15:10.480> was<00:15:10.720> like<00:15:10.880> wait<00:15:11.040> a

queens honestly and that was like wait a

queens honestly and that was like wait a
minute<00:15:12.320> these

minute these

minute these
creatures<00:15:14.320> are<00:15:14.480> just<00:15:14.720> so<00:15:15.120> free<00:15:15.920> it<00:15:16.000> doesn't

creatures are just so free it doesn't

creatures are just so free it doesn't
matter<00:15:16.639> if<00:15:16.720> you're<00:15:16.959> hey<00:15:17.279> girl<00:15:17.680> hey<00:15:18.000> boy

matter if you're hey girl hey boy

matter if you're hey girl hey boy
whatever<00:15:18.720> like<00:15:18.959> it<00:15:19.040> was<00:15:19.199> just<00:15:19.440> so<00:15:19.680> cool<00:15:20.320> that

whatever like it was just so cool that

whatever like it was just so cool that
you<00:15:20.800> could<00:15:20.959> be

you could be

you could be
that<00:15:21.839> somebody<00:15:22.160> could<00:15:22.320> be<00:15:22.560> celebrated

that somebody could be celebrated

that somebody could be celebrated
for

for

for
being<00:15:24.880> different<00:15:25.760> and<00:15:26.079> i<00:15:26.320> spent<00:15:26.720> so<00:15:27.040> long

being different and i spent so long

being different and i spent so long
trying<00:15:28.399> to

trying to

trying to
be<00:15:29.279> the<00:15:29.519> same

be the same

be the same
that<00:15:30.639> when<00:15:30.880> i<00:15:31.120> finally<00:15:31.440> started<00:15:31.680> hanging<00:15:32.000> out

that when i finally started hanging out

that when i finally started hanging out
with<00:15:32.320> these<00:15:32.560> people<00:15:32.800> i<00:15:32.880> was<00:15:32.959> like<00:15:33.040> you<00:15:33.199> know

with these people i was like you know

with these people i was like you know
what

what

what
i'm<00:15:34.720> cooler<00:15:35.120> if<00:15:35.279> i'm<00:15:35.600> just<00:15:35.839> myself<00:15:36.399> like<00:15:36.560> i

i'm cooler if i'm just myself like i

i'm cooler if i'm just myself like i
don't<00:15:37.360> need<00:15:37.600> to<00:15:37.680> try<00:15:37.839> to<00:15:38.000> fit<00:15:38.160> into<00:15:38.320> this

don't need to try to fit into this

don't need to try to fit into this
something<00:15:38.720> else<00:15:38.880> so<00:15:38.959> i<00:15:39.120> would<00:15:39.279> say<00:15:39.440> probably

something else so i would say probably

something else so i would say probably
for<00:15:39.920> the<00:15:40.079> last<00:15:40.800> three<00:15:41.120> years

for the last three years

for the last three years
i've<00:15:42.720> been<00:15:43.440> a<00:15:43.519> lot<00:15:43.680> more<00:15:43.920> open<00:15:44.240> with<00:15:44.399> my

i've been a lot more open with my

i've been a lot more open with my
creative<00:15:45.199> expression

creative expression

creative expression
as<00:15:46.639> far<00:15:46.800> as<00:15:46.959> like<00:15:47.199> makeup<00:15:47.839> and<00:15:48.000> costuming<00:15:48.959> and

as far as like makeup and costuming and

as far as like makeup and costuming and
like<00:15:49.360> clothing<00:15:49.839> and<00:15:50.000> fashion<00:15:50.399> is<00:15:50.480> concerned<00:15:51.600> i

like clothing and fashion is concerned i

like clothing and fashion is concerned i
feel<00:15:52.160> like<00:15:52.880> now

feel like now

feel like now
i<00:15:53.839> am<00:15:54.079> able<00:15:54.399> to<00:15:54.880> explore

i am able to explore

i am able to explore
like<00:15:56.800> what<00:15:57.040> is<00:15:57.199> actually<00:15:57.519> beautiful<00:15:58.000> to<00:15:58.160> me

like what is actually beautiful to me

like what is actually beautiful to me
i<00:16:00.160> myself

i myself

i myself
am<00:16:01.360> a<00:16:01.440> bit<00:16:01.680> clownish<00:16:02.399> a<00:16:02.480> bit<00:16:02.720> zany<00:16:03.199> a<00:16:03.279> bit

am a bit clownish a bit zany a bit

am a bit clownish a bit zany a bit
bizarre<00:16:04.320> and<00:16:04.639> the<00:16:04.800> drag<00:16:05.120> persona<00:16:05.839> just<00:16:06.079> kind

bizarre and the drag persona just kind

bizarre and the drag persona just kind
of

of

of
enhances<00:16:07.600> that<00:16:07.759> part<00:16:08.000> of<00:16:08.079> my<00:16:08.240> personality

enhances that part of my personality

enhances that part of my personality
she's<00:16:09.519> got<00:16:09.680> a<00:16:09.839> loud<00:16:10.079> mouth

she's got a loud mouth

she's got a loud mouth
with<00:16:12.560> no<00:16:12.800> filter<00:16:13.519> sometimes<00:16:13.839> she<00:16:14.000> needs<00:16:14.160> that

with no filter sometimes she needs that

with no filter sometimes she needs that
filter<00:16:15.199> i<00:16:15.360> incorporated<00:16:15.920> drag<00:16:16.240> into<00:16:16.480> my<00:16:16.639> life

filter i incorporated drag into my life

filter i incorporated drag into my life
about

about

about
about<00:16:18.000> two<00:16:18.160> years<00:16:18.399> ago<00:16:18.880> i'd<00:16:19.040> spend<00:16:19.199> about<00:16:19.440> five

about two years ago i'd spend about five

about two years ago i'd spend about five
years<00:16:19.920> with<00:16:20.240> one<00:16:20.480> person<00:16:20.880> and<00:16:21.120> you<00:16:21.279> know<00:16:21.440> when

years with one person and you know when

years with one person and you know when
you're<00:16:21.680> in<00:16:21.839> a<00:16:22.000> long-term<00:16:22.480> relationship<00:16:23.120> you

you're in a long-term relationship you

you're in a long-term relationship you
almost<00:16:23.680> forget<00:16:24.160> who<00:16:24.399> you<00:16:24.720> are<00:16:25.360> and<00:16:25.519> so<00:16:26.000> being

almost forget who you are and so being

almost forget who you are and so being
on<00:16:26.399> my<00:16:26.560> own<00:16:26.800> again<00:16:27.120> i<00:16:27.279> didn't<00:16:27.360> know<00:16:27.519> how<00:16:27.600> to

on my own again i didn't know how to

on my own again i didn't know how to
express<00:16:28.000> myself<00:16:28.320> i<00:16:28.399> didn't<00:16:28.560> know<00:16:28.639> how<00:16:28.800> to<00:16:28.880> live

express myself i didn't know how to live

express myself i didn't know how to live
i<00:16:29.199> didn't<00:16:29.440> know<00:16:29.519> how<00:16:29.759> to<00:16:30.160> function<00:16:30.800> and<00:16:31.120> i<00:16:31.279> know

i didn't know how to function and i know

i didn't know how to function and i know
motivation<00:16:32.160> a<00:16:32.240> good<00:16:32.399> friend<00:16:32.560> of<00:16:32.720> mine<00:16:32.880> is<00:16:33.040> a

motivation a good friend of mine is a

motivation a good friend of mine is a
drag<00:16:33.519> queen<00:16:33.680> and<00:16:33.839> she<00:16:34.000> invited<00:16:34.480> me<00:16:34.639> to<00:16:34.880> perform

drag queen and she invited me to perform

drag queen and she invited me to perform
in<00:16:35.279> a<00:16:35.360> virgin<00:16:35.759> show<00:16:36.079> and<00:16:36.160> i<00:16:36.240> thought<00:16:36.480> okay<00:16:36.720> well

in a virgin show and i thought okay well

in a virgin show and i thought okay well
this<00:16:37.040> is<00:16:37.199> something<00:16:37.519> fun<00:16:37.759> this<00:16:38.000> is<00:16:38.079> something

this is something fun this is something

this is something fun this is something
creative<00:16:38.720> to<00:16:38.959> do<00:16:39.360> it<00:16:39.519> went<00:16:40.079> really<00:16:40.639> well<00:16:41.040> it

creative to do it went really well it

creative to do it went really well it
was<00:16:41.440> it<00:16:41.519> was<00:16:41.680> addicting<00:16:42.399> like<00:16:42.639> that<00:16:42.880> first

was it was addicting like that first

was it was addicting like that first
number<00:16:43.360> i<00:16:43.519> did<00:16:44.079> the<00:16:44.320> applause<00:16:45.040> and<00:16:45.199> and<00:16:45.440> the

number i did the applause and and the

number i did the applause and and the
lights<00:16:45.920> and<00:16:46.000> just<00:16:46.240> feeling<00:16:46.560> glamorous<00:16:47.040> and

lights and just feeling glamorous and

lights and just feeling glamorous and
fabulous<00:16:47.680> it<00:16:47.839> was<00:16:47.920> addicting<00:16:48.399> and<00:16:48.560> i<00:16:48.639> just

fabulous it was addicting and i just

fabulous it was addicting and i just
wanted<00:16:49.040> more<00:16:49.199> and<00:16:49.279> more<00:16:49.519> and<00:16:49.600> more<00:16:50.079> i<00:16:50.240> found

wanted more and more and more i found

wanted more and more and more i found
myself<00:16:51.199> building<00:16:51.519> my<00:16:51.680> confidence<00:16:52.240> back<00:16:52.480> up

myself building my confidence back up

myself building my confidence back up
again<00:16:53.120> that<00:16:53.279> i<00:16:53.360> had<00:16:53.519> lost<00:16:53.839> from<00:16:54.079> my<00:16:54.240> breakup

again that i had lost from my breakup

again that i had lost from my breakup
and<00:16:54.800> so<00:16:54.959> drag<00:16:55.279> has<00:16:55.440> really<00:16:55.600> helped<00:16:55.839> me<00:16:56.079> in<00:16:56.160> the

and so drag has really helped me in the

and so drag has really helped me in the
sense<00:16:56.639> that

sense that

sense that
it<00:16:57.680> built<00:16:57.920> up<00:16:58.000> a<00:16:58.079> confidence<00:16:58.480> i<00:16:58.639> never<00:16:58.800> had

it built up a confidence i never had

it built up a confidence i never had
before<00:16:59.279> even<00:16:59.759> while<00:16:59.920> i<00:17:00.000> was<00:17:00.240> in<00:17:00.320> a

before even while i was in a

before even while i was in a
relationship<00:17:01.199> i<00:17:01.440> identify<00:17:02.000> as<00:17:02.160> a<00:17:02.399> man

relationship i identify as a man

relationship i identify as a man
um<00:17:03.600> i<00:17:03.759> identify<00:17:04.480> as<00:17:04.640> a<00:17:04.799> black<00:17:05.199> man<00:17:05.520> as<00:17:05.679> a

um i identify as a black man as a

um i identify as a black man as a
southerner<00:17:06.480> i'm<00:17:06.640> an<00:17:06.799> actor<00:17:07.360> a<00:17:07.520> drag<00:17:07.919> queen

southerner i'm an actor a drag queen

southerner i'm an actor a drag queen
um

um

um
i<00:17:09.839> always<00:17:10.160> felt<00:17:10.319> like<00:17:10.480> i<00:17:10.559> was<00:17:10.640> just<00:17:10.880> like<00:17:10.959> a

i always felt like i was just like a

i always felt like i was just like a
third<00:17:11.600> gender<00:17:11.919> like<00:17:12.160> not<00:17:12.319> like<00:17:12.480> a<00:17:12.559> boy<00:17:12.799> or<00:17:12.959> a

third gender like not like a boy or a

third gender like not like a boy or a
girl<00:17:13.280> but<00:17:13.439> like<00:17:13.679> a<00:17:13.839> girl<00:17:14.240> like<00:17:14.480> a<00:17:14.640> g<00:17:14.880> you<00:17:15.039> are

girl but like a girl like a g you are

girl but like a girl like a g you are
like<00:17:15.520> girl<00:17:15.839> like<00:17:16.079> girl

like girl like girl

like girl like girl
hey<00:17:17.280> girl<00:17:17.839> like<00:17:18.000> that<00:17:18.240> so<00:17:18.400> i'm<00:17:18.559> a<00:17:18.720> girl<00:17:19.520> but<00:17:19.679> not

hey girl like that so i'm a girl but not

hey girl like that so i'm a girl but not
like<00:17:20.000> a<00:17:20.079> lady

like a lady

like a lady
but<00:17:21.760> a<00:17:21.919> girl

but a girl

but a girl
i'm<00:17:23.439> really<00:17:23.679> old

i'm really old

i'm really old
you<00:17:25.600> sit<00:17:25.919> on<00:17:26.000> real<00:17:26.240> housewives<00:17:26.880> up<00:17:27.039> a<00:17:27.199> toe<00:17:27.439> mac

you sit on real housewives up a toe mac

you sit on real housewives up a toe mac
you<00:17:28.400> even<00:17:28.640> see<00:17:28.799> it<00:17:28.960> on<00:17:29.120> little<00:17:29.280> women<00:17:29.760> l.a

you even see it on little women l.a

you even see it on little women l.a
i<00:17:31.600> don't<00:17:31.679> know<00:17:31.840> why<00:17:32.080> you<00:17:32.240> all<00:17:32.480> gagging<00:17:33.200> hearts

i don't know why you all gagging hearts

i don't know why you all gagging hearts
first<00:17:33.919> person

first person

first person
life

life

life
revolves<00:17:36.799> around<00:17:37.200> draft<00:17:37.919> are<00:17:38.080> you<00:17:38.320> ever<00:17:38.480> in<00:17:38.559> my

revolves around draft are you ever in my

revolves around draft are you ever in my
apartment<00:17:39.120> my<00:17:39.280> apartment<00:17:39.840> is<00:17:40.080> like<00:17:40.240> a<00:17:40.480> big

apartment my apartment is like a big

apartment my apartment is like a big
drag<00:17:41.280> qualifier<00:17:41.840> like<00:17:42.000> you<00:17:42.160> walk<00:17:42.480> in

drag qualifier like you walk in

drag qualifier like you walk in
rehearsals<00:17:44.000> thanks<00:17:44.240> to<00:17:44.320> high<00:17:44.480> heels<00:17:44.880> it's

rehearsals thanks to high heels it's

rehearsals thanks to high heels it's
really<00:17:45.200> hard<00:17:45.360> to<00:17:45.440> hook<00:17:45.679> up<00:17:45.840> my<00:17:45.919> apartment

really hard to hook up my apartment

really hard to hook up my apartment
because<00:17:46.799> it<00:17:46.960> takes<00:17:47.200> you<00:17:47.360> out<00:17:47.440> of<00:17:47.600> it<00:17:48.080> you<00:17:48.240> see

because it takes you out of it you see

because it takes you out of it you see
like<00:17:48.559> all<00:17:48.640> my<00:17:48.880> wigs<00:17:49.360> and<00:17:49.600> shoes<00:17:50.080> and

like all my wigs and shoes and

like all my wigs and shoes and
everything<00:17:51.120> everywhere<00:17:52.000> um<00:17:52.320> drag<00:17:52.799> is<00:17:53.200> i<00:17:53.280> mean

everything everywhere um drag is i mean

everything everywhere um drag is i mean
i<00:17:53.520> do<00:17:53.679> it<00:17:53.760> like<00:17:54.240> six<00:17:54.799> seven<00:17:55.039> days

i do it like six seven days

i do it like six seven days
i<00:17:56.320> am<00:17:56.559> dressed

i am dressed

i am dressed
i'm

so when they say give it up for about

so when they say give it up for about
the<00:18:03.200> drag<00:18:03.600> queen<00:18:03.840> i<00:18:04.000> expect<00:18:04.320> you<00:18:04.400> all<00:18:04.559> to<00:18:04.720> go

the drag queen i expect you all to go

the drag queen i expect you all to go
crazy<00:18:05.520> and<00:18:05.600> you're<00:18:05.919> like

no it's too late you've embarrassed

no it's too late you've embarrassed
yourself<00:18:12.000> so<00:18:12.160> it<00:18:12.400> is<00:18:12.640> literally<00:18:13.039> the<00:18:13.120> most

yourself so it is literally the most

yourself so it is literally the most
important<00:18:13.600> thing<00:18:13.760> in<00:18:13.840> my<00:18:14.000> life<00:18:14.240> i<00:18:14.320> mean<00:18:14.799> i'm

important thing in my life i mean i'm

important thing in my life i mean i'm
lucky<00:18:15.200> enough<00:18:15.360> to<00:18:15.440> have<00:18:15.600> a<00:18:15.679> job<00:18:15.919> that<00:18:16.000> i<00:18:16.240> really

lucky enough to have a job that i really

lucky enough to have a job that i really
love

love

love
like<00:18:17.679> i<00:18:17.840> really<00:18:18.080> love<00:18:18.559> being<00:18:18.720> a<00:18:18.799> drag<00:18:19.039> queen

like i really love being a drag queen

like i really love being a drag queen
honestly<00:18:19.840> doing<00:18:20.160> drag<00:18:20.640> or<00:18:20.880> just<00:18:21.039> knowing<00:18:21.360> drag

honestly doing drag or just knowing drag

honestly doing drag or just knowing drag
queens<00:18:22.400> is<00:18:22.559> a<00:18:22.640> great<00:18:22.960> way<00:18:23.120> to<00:18:23.280> get<00:18:23.520> out<00:18:23.760> of<00:18:23.840> your

queens is a great way to get out of your

queens is a great way to get out of your
own<00:18:24.320> masculinity<00:18:25.360> which<00:18:25.600> is<00:18:25.760> not<00:18:25.919> even<00:18:26.240> what

own masculinity which is not even what

own masculinity which is not even what
is<00:18:26.720> that<00:18:27.120> it's<00:18:27.200> not<00:18:27.360> even<00:18:27.520> like<00:18:27.679> a<00:18:27.760> real<00:18:28.000> thing

is that it's not even like a real thing

is that it's not even like a real thing
but<00:18:28.320> it's<00:18:28.400> like<00:18:28.559> something<00:18:28.799> that<00:18:28.880> the<00:18:29.039> world

but it's like something that the world

but it's like something that the world
imposes<00:18:29.919> on<00:18:30.160> you<00:18:30.240> have<00:18:30.400> to<00:18:30.480> be<00:18:30.559> more<00:18:30.799> masculine

imposes on you have to be more masculine

imposes on you have to be more masculine
you<00:18:31.280> have<00:18:31.440> to<00:18:31.520> be<00:18:31.679> more<00:18:32.240> you<00:18:32.400> know<00:18:32.559> even<00:18:32.720> in<00:18:32.880> the

you have to be more you know even in the

you have to be more you know even in the
gay<00:18:33.120> community<00:18:34.080> you<00:18:34.240> have<00:18:34.320> to<00:18:34.480> be<00:18:34.720> like

gay community you have to be like

gay community you have to be like
you<00:18:35.760> have<00:18:35.919> to<00:18:36.000> come<00:18:36.160> across<00:18:36.559> like<00:18:36.640> really

you have to come across like really

you have to come across like really
really<00:18:37.280> masculine<00:18:37.679> all<00:18:37.760> the<00:18:37.840> time<00:18:38.400> i<00:18:38.480> mean

really masculine all the time i mean

really masculine all the time i mean
let's<00:18:38.720> be<00:18:38.880> honest<00:18:39.200> i<00:18:39.280> am<00:18:39.520> not<00:18:39.919> i<00:18:40.000> don't<00:18:40.160> really

let's be honest i am not i don't really

let's be honest i am not i don't really
look<00:18:40.559> effeminate<00:18:41.440> in<00:18:41.600> my

look effeminate in my

look effeminate in my
male<00:18:42.799> form<00:18:43.360> i<00:18:43.440> know<00:18:43.760> i'm<00:18:43.840> a<00:18:43.919> six<00:18:44.160> foot<00:18:44.320> two<00:18:44.960> like

male form i know i'm a six foot two like

male form i know i'm a six foot two like
a<00:18:45.520> big<00:18:45.840> black<00:18:46.080> man<00:18:46.480> despite<00:18:46.799> the<00:18:46.880> thing<00:18:47.039> i'm

a big black man despite the thing i'm

a big black man despite the thing i'm
wearing<00:18:47.520> like<00:18:47.760> leather<00:18:48.080> overalls<00:18:48.640> but<00:18:48.799> if<00:18:48.960> i'm

wearing like leather overalls but if i'm

wearing like leather overalls but if i'm
wearing<00:18:49.280> like<00:18:49.440> a<00:18:49.520> hoodie

wearing like a hoodie

wearing like a hoodie
you<00:18:50.720> know

you know

you know
then<00:18:52.000> if<00:18:52.160> i'm<00:18:52.240> giving<00:18:52.480> you<00:18:52.640> like<00:18:52.880> trayvon

then if i'm giving you like trayvon

then if i'm giving you like trayvon
martin<00:18:53.679> the<00:18:53.760> house<00:18:54.000> down<00:18:54.240> boots<00:18:54.559> everyone

martin the house down boots everyone

martin the house down boots everyone
would<00:18:54.960> be<00:18:55.120> like<00:18:55.440> nervous<00:18:55.840> when<00:18:56.000> they<00:18:56.160> see<00:18:56.320> me

would be like nervous when they see me

would be like nervous when they see me
um

um

um
hands<00:18:58.960> up

hands up

hands up
but<00:19:01.280> when<00:19:01.440> i<00:19:01.520> get<00:19:01.679> a<00:19:01.760> chance<00:19:02.160> to<00:19:02.480> be

but when i get a chance to be

but when i get a chance to be
like<00:19:03.760> a<00:19:04.160> like<00:19:04.400> a<00:19:04.960> tall<00:19:05.600> glamazonian<00:19:06.640> really

like a like a tall glamazonian really

like a like a tall glamazonian really
curvy<00:19:07.919> like<00:19:08.240> black<00:19:08.559> woman<00:19:09.280> as<00:19:09.520> opposed<00:19:09.840> to

curvy like black woman as opposed to

curvy like black woman as opposed to
being<00:19:10.160> like<00:19:10.320> i'm<00:19:10.559> like<00:19:10.720> a<00:19:10.799> stick<00:19:11.120> figure<00:19:11.360> i

being like i'm like a stick figure i

being like i'm like a stick figure i
don't<00:19:11.520> have<00:19:11.679> any<00:19:11.919> curves<00:19:12.799> anywhere<00:19:13.120> on<00:19:13.280> my

don't have any curves anywhere on my

don't have any curves anywhere on my
bottoms<00:19:13.840> up<00:19:14.000> and<00:19:14.160> down<00:19:14.640> and<00:19:14.720> when<00:19:14.880> i<00:19:14.960> get

bottoms up and down and when i get

bottoms up and down and when i get
dragged<00:19:15.840> it's<00:19:16.080> like<00:19:16.480> people<00:19:16.799> responding<00:19:17.520> so

dragged it's like people responding so

dragged it's like people responding so
differently

differently

differently
when<00:19:19.120> people<00:19:19.360> respond<00:19:19.600> to<00:19:19.679> you<00:19:19.760> no<00:19:19.919> matter

when people respond to you no matter

when people respond to you no matter
what<00:19:20.240> like<00:19:20.320> if<00:19:20.400> you're<00:19:20.559> tall<00:19:20.880> versus<00:19:21.120> if

what like if you're tall versus if

what like if you're tall versus if
you're<00:19:21.360> short<00:19:21.600> you<00:19:21.679> get<00:19:21.840> two<00:19:22.080> different

you're short you get two different

you're short you get two different
perspectives<00:19:22.799> in<00:19:22.880> life<00:19:23.360> if<00:19:23.520> you're<00:19:23.760> if<00:19:23.919> you're

perspectives in life if you're if you're

perspectives in life if you're if you're
skinny<00:19:24.480> versus<00:19:24.720> if<00:19:24.799> you're<00:19:25.039> fat<00:19:25.200> you<00:19:25.280> get<00:19:25.440> two

skinny versus if you're fat you get two

skinny versus if you're fat you get two
different<00:19:25.760> perspectives<00:19:26.240> in<00:19:26.320> life<00:19:26.720> and<00:19:26.799> if

different perspectives in life and if

different perspectives in life and if
you're<00:19:27.120> a<00:19:27.200> man<00:19:27.440> or<00:19:27.600> if<00:19:27.679> you're<00:19:27.760> a<00:19:27.919> woman<00:19:28.480> or<00:19:28.720> if

you're a man or if you're a woman or if

you're a man or if you're a woman or if
you're<00:19:28.960> like<00:19:29.120> something<00:19:29.520> different<00:19:29.919> like<00:19:30.160> a

you're like something different like a

you're like something different like a
drag<00:19:30.640> queen<00:19:30.960> like<00:19:31.120> an<00:19:31.200> other

drag queen like an other

drag queen like an other
worldly<00:19:32.400> creature<00:19:33.200> i<00:19:33.280> mean<00:19:33.440> i<00:19:33.600> think<00:19:33.760> everyone

worldly creature i mean i think everyone

worldly creature i mean i think everyone
should<00:19:34.160> have<00:19:34.320> the<00:19:34.400> experience<00:19:34.799> of<00:19:34.960> walking

should have the experience of walking

should have the experience of walking
through<00:19:35.520> a<00:19:35.840> crowded<00:19:36.240> bar

through a crowded bar

through a crowded bar
as<00:19:37.280> a<00:19:37.440> big<00:19:37.679> black<00:19:37.919> drag<00:19:38.160> queen<00:19:38.799> but<00:19:38.960> most

as a big black drag queen but most

as a big black drag queen but most
people<00:19:39.360> won't<00:19:39.520> have<00:19:39.679> that<00:19:39.840> experience<00:19:40.160> but<00:19:40.400> i

people won't have that experience but i

people won't have that experience but i
mean<00:19:40.640> it<00:19:40.799> is<00:19:40.880> a<00:19:41.039> world<00:19:41.360> of<00:19:41.520> difference<00:19:41.919> versus

mean it is a world of difference versus

mean it is a world of difference versus
walking<00:19:42.640> through<00:19:43.120> as<00:19:43.360> just<00:19:43.520> a<00:19:43.600> skinny<00:19:44.000> black

walking through as just a skinny black

walking through as just a skinny black
dude<00:19:44.720> i<00:19:44.880> mean<00:19:44.960> they<00:19:45.120> won't<00:19:45.280> even<00:19:45.440> look<00:19:45.600> twice

dude i mean they won't even look twice

dude i mean they won't even look twice
but<00:19:46.000> if<00:19:46.080> you<00:19:46.160> were<00:19:46.240> like<00:19:46.400> the<00:19:46.640> tallest<00:19:46.960> one<00:19:47.120> in

but if you were like the tallest one in

but if you were like the tallest one in
the<00:19:47.280> room<00:19:47.919> you<00:19:48.080> have<00:19:48.240> hair<00:19:48.559> up<00:19:48.720> to<00:19:49.120> jesus<00:19:50.080> um

the room you have hair up to jesus um

the room you have hair up to jesus um
you<00:19:50.720> have<00:19:50.960> six<00:19:51.200> inch<00:19:51.360> pumps<00:19:51.679> on

you have six inch pumps on

you have six inch pumps on
as<00:19:52.640> soon<00:19:52.799> as<00:19:52.880> you<00:19:53.039> walk<00:19:53.280> and<00:19:53.360> everyone's<00:19:53.760> like

as soon as you walk and everyone's like

as soon as you walk and everyone's like
oh<00:19:54.480> my<00:19:54.960> god<00:19:55.280> who<00:19:55.600> is<00:19:55.840> that<00:19:56.400> it's<00:19:56.559> really<00:19:56.960> funny

oh my god who is that it's really funny

oh my god who is that it's really funny
because<00:19:57.520> when<00:19:57.679> i<00:19:57.760> go<00:19:57.919> to<00:19:58.080> different<00:19:58.799> places<00:19:59.280> to

because when i go to different places to

because when i go to different places to
perform<00:20:00.240> and<00:20:00.400> i<00:20:00.480> come<00:20:00.720> in<00:20:00.880> like<00:20:01.120> you<00:20:01.200> know<00:20:01.360> this

perform and i come in like you know this

perform and i come in like you know this
big<00:20:01.760> bouncer<00:20:02.559> you<00:20:02.720> know<00:20:02.960> bodyguard<00:20:03.440> looking

big bouncer you know bodyguard looking

big bouncer you know bodyguard looking
guys<00:20:04.080> stuff<00:20:04.320> and<00:20:04.480> i<00:20:04.559> tell<00:20:04.799> other<00:20:05.039> queens<00:20:05.760> oh<00:20:06.000> i

guys stuff and i tell other queens oh i

guys stuff and i tell other queens oh i
play<00:20:06.400> football<00:20:06.799> and<00:20:06.880> stuff<00:20:07.039> and<00:20:07.120> they

play football and stuff and they

play football and stuff and they
automatically<00:20:07.679> like<00:20:08.159> oh<00:20:08.320> for<00:20:08.559> real<00:20:08.960> you<00:20:09.120> play

automatically like oh for real you play

automatically like oh for real you play
you<00:20:09.760> play<00:20:09.919> football<00:20:10.400> and<00:20:10.480> stuff<00:20:10.640> and<00:20:10.720> i'm<00:20:10.799> like

you play football and stuff and i'm like

you play football and stuff and i'm like
yeah<00:20:11.360> you<00:20:11.440> know<00:20:11.600> what's<00:20:11.840> up<00:20:11.919> with<00:20:12.080> that<00:20:12.240> a<00:20:12.320> lot

yeah you know what's up with that a lot

yeah you know what's up with that a lot
of<00:20:12.559> them<00:20:12.720> want<00:20:12.880> to<00:20:12.960> come<00:20:13.600> and<00:20:13.760> play<00:20:14.080> but<00:20:14.240> they

of them want to come and play but they

of them want to come and play but they
want<00:20:14.640> to<00:20:14.799> play<00:20:14.960> for<00:20:15.120> the<00:20:15.200> wrong<00:20:15.520> reasons<00:20:16.400> and

want to play for the wrong reasons and

want to play for the wrong reasons and
you<00:20:16.720> know<00:20:16.880> so<00:20:17.039> i'm<00:20:17.200> the<00:20:17.360> only<00:20:17.600> open<00:20:18.000> drag<00:20:18.720> in

you know so i'm the only open drag in

you know so i'm the only open drag in
the<00:20:19.039> league<00:20:20.080> and<00:20:20.480> um<00:20:21.200> and<00:20:21.679> even<00:20:21.840> when<00:20:22.000> i<00:20:22.080> go<00:20:22.320> to

the league and um and even when i go to

the league and um and even when i go to
other<00:20:22.799> clubs<00:20:23.039> and<00:20:23.120> just<00:20:23.280> tell<00:20:23.600> people<00:20:23.840> in

other clubs and just tell people in

other clubs and just tell people in
general<00:20:24.480> i<00:20:24.720> love<00:20:25.039> my<00:20:25.520> kicker<00:20:25.919> is<00:20:26.640> after<00:20:26.960> i'm

general i love my kicker is after i'm

general i love my kicker is after i'm
out<00:20:27.360> of<00:20:27.440> drag<00:20:28.159> i<00:20:28.400> go<00:20:28.640> up<00:20:28.720> to<00:20:28.880> the<00:20:28.960> people<00:20:29.200> that

out of drag i go up to the people that

out of drag i go up to the people that
really<00:20:29.919> love<00:20:30.159> my<00:20:30.320> performance<00:20:30.799> so<00:20:31.039> much<00:20:31.600> much

really love my performance so much much

really love my performance so much much
and<00:20:31.919> they'll<00:20:32.159> say<00:20:32.720> um<00:20:32.960> you<00:20:33.039> know<00:20:33.280> yeah<00:20:33.440> we're

and they'll say um you know yeah we're

and they'll say um you know yeah we're
waiting<00:20:33.840> on<00:20:33.919> somebody<00:20:34.320> or<00:20:34.480> um<00:20:34.640> we're<00:20:34.799> here<00:20:34.960> and

waiting on somebody or um we're here and

waiting on somebody or um we're here and
i<00:20:35.200> say<00:20:35.360> well<00:20:35.520> i<00:20:35.600> was<00:20:35.760> the<00:20:35.840> drag<00:20:36.000> queen<00:20:36.240> that<00:20:36.400> was

i say well i was the drag queen that was

i say well i was the drag queen that was
singing<00:20:37.039> no

singing no

singing no
excuse<00:20:38.159> i<00:20:38.159> don't<00:20:38.240> mean<00:20:38.400> to<00:20:38.480> curse<00:20:38.720> but<00:20:38.880> no<00:20:39.360> way

excuse i don't mean to curse but no way

excuse i don't mean to curse but no way
really<00:20:40.559> that<00:20:40.720> was<00:20:40.960> you<00:20:41.360> jackie<00:20:41.760> lets<00:20:42.000> me<00:20:42.159> be

really that was you jackie lets me be

really that was you jackie lets me be
more<00:20:42.799> more<00:20:43.039> free<00:20:43.760> and<00:20:43.919> as<00:20:44.080> a<00:20:44.159> black<00:20:44.480> man

more more free and as a black man

more more free and as a black man
you<00:20:45.520> know<00:20:45.760> is<00:20:45.919> still

you know is still

you know is still
you<00:20:47.039> know<00:20:48.000> not<00:20:48.240> really<00:20:48.559> accepted<00:20:49.440> it's

you know not really accepted it's

you know not really accepted it's
tolerated<00:20:50.960> you<00:20:51.120> know<00:20:51.600> like<00:20:52.000> i'm<00:20:52.159> one<00:20:52.320> of<00:20:52.400> the

tolerated you know like i'm one of the

tolerated you know like i'm one of the
gay<00:20:52.720> guys<00:20:53.039> that's<00:20:53.280> not<00:20:53.520> being<00:20:53.760> used<00:20:54.000> to<00:20:54.080> be

gay guys that's not being used to be

gay guys that's not being used to be
called<00:20:54.480> a

called a

called a
punk<00:20:55.440> or<00:20:55.679> you<00:20:55.760> know<00:20:56.320> or

punk or you know or

punk or you know or
look<00:20:57.440> how<00:20:57.600> big<00:20:57.840> i<00:20:58.000> am<00:20:58.159> you<00:20:58.240> know<00:20:58.400> i<00:20:58.480> play<00:20:58.640> for

look how big i am you know i play for

look how big i am you know i play for
the<00:20:58.880> new<00:20:59.039> york<00:20:59.200> gay<00:20:59.360> football<00:20:59.679> league<00:20:59.919> i've

the new york gay football league i've

the new york gay football league i've
been<00:21:00.159> with<00:21:00.320> them<00:21:00.400> for<00:21:00.559> 10<00:21:00.799> years<00:21:01.360> and<00:21:02.000> one<00:21:02.159> day

been with them for 10 years and one day

been with them for 10 years and one day
i<00:21:02.480> did<00:21:02.799> um<00:21:03.120> a<00:21:03.280> club<00:21:03.760> in<00:21:03.919> philadelphia<00:21:04.880> for

i did um a club in philadelphia for

i did um a club in philadelphia for
their<00:21:05.200> contest<00:21:05.679> was<00:21:05.840> for<00:21:06.000> 200<00:21:06.720> and<00:21:06.880> i<00:21:07.120> sang

their contest was for 200 and i sang

their contest was for 200 and i sang
live<00:21:07.919> and<00:21:08.080> i<00:21:08.159> was<00:21:08.240> received<00:21:08.720> so<00:21:08.960> well

live and i was received so well

live and i was received so well
and<00:21:09.840> i<00:21:09.919> was<00:21:10.080> like<00:21:10.720> oh<00:21:11.039> shoot<00:21:11.440> i<00:21:11.679> can<00:21:11.919> do<00:21:12.159> this<00:21:12.559> so

and i was like oh shoot i can do this so

and i was like oh shoot i can do this so
and<00:21:13.520> um<00:21:13.919> drag<00:21:14.320> you<00:21:14.400> know<00:21:14.799> from<00:21:15.039> them<00:21:15.360> so

and um drag you know from them so

and um drag you know from them so
i<00:21:16.720> believe<00:21:16.960> drag<00:21:17.200> is<00:21:17.280> whatever<00:21:17.520> you<00:21:17.600> want<00:21:17.760> it

i believe drag is whatever you want it

i believe drag is whatever you want it
to<00:21:17.919> be<00:21:18.080> i<00:21:18.159> don't<00:21:18.240> think<00:21:18.320> there's<00:21:18.559> like<00:21:18.640> a<00:21:18.720> label

to be i don't think there's like a label

to be i don't think there's like a label
or<00:21:19.120> a<00:21:19.200> definition<00:21:19.679> for<00:21:19.840> drag<00:21:20.159> i<00:21:20.320> think<00:21:20.559> if<00:21:20.799> you

or a definition for drag i think if you

or a definition for drag i think if you
you<00:21:21.360> know<00:21:21.760> wear<00:21:22.159> overalls<00:21:22.720> i'm<00:21:22.880> like<00:21:23.200> do

you know wear overalls i'm like do

you know wear overalls i'm like do
whatever<00:21:23.679> you<00:21:23.840> say<00:21:24.000> that's<00:21:24.240> drag<00:21:24.480> that's<00:21:24.720> your

whatever you say that's drag that's your

whatever you say that's drag that's your
drag<00:21:25.360> is<00:21:25.919> whatever<00:21:26.559> you<00:21:26.720> want<00:21:26.880> it<00:21:26.960> to<00:21:27.039> be<00:21:27.280> which

drag is whatever you want it to be which

drag is whatever you want it to be which
is<00:21:27.520> why<00:21:27.679> i<00:21:27.760> think<00:21:27.919> drag<00:21:28.159> is<00:21:28.320> always<00:21:28.640> exciting

is why i think drag is always exciting

is why i think drag is always exciting
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
do<00:21:33.600> you<00:21:33.760> know<00:21:34.000> why<00:21:34.480> this<00:21:34.720> is<00:21:34.799> that<00:21:34.960> girl<00:21:35.200> this

do you know why this is that girl this

do you know why this is that girl this
is<00:21:35.440> how<00:21:35.600> slime<00:21:35.919> stills<00:21:36.240> get<00:21:36.400> ready

is how slime stills get ready

is how slime stills get ready
there's<00:21:37.520> no<00:21:37.760> lines<00:21:38.080> to<00:21:38.159> color<00:21:38.480> inside<00:21:38.880> of

there's no lines to color inside of

there's no lines to color inside of
there's<00:21:39.120> no<00:21:39.360> box<00:21:39.679> to<00:21:39.840> be<00:21:39.919> put<00:21:40.159> into<00:21:40.960> you<00:21:41.120> can

there's no box to be put into you can

there's no box to be put into you can
make

make

make
anything

anything

anything
drag<00:21:45.440> right<00:21:45.600> it's<00:21:45.760> like

drag right it's like

drag right it's like
stereotypical<00:21:47.039> but<00:21:47.200> rupaul's<00:21:47.679> like<00:21:48.000> sob

stereotypical but rupaul's like sob

stereotypical but rupaul's like sob
we're<00:21:48.400> all<00:21:48.480> more<00:21:48.799> naked<00:21:49.120> and<00:21:49.200> the<00:21:49.280> rest<00:21:49.520> is

we're all more naked and the rest is

we're all more naked and the rest is
drag<00:21:50.000> i<00:21:50.240> really<00:21:50.559> firmly<00:21:50.880> believe<00:21:51.200> that

drag i really firmly believe that

drag i really firmly believe that
anything<00:21:52.960> can<00:21:53.120> be<00:21:53.280> dry<00:21:53.760> my<00:21:53.919> career<00:21:54.240> is<00:21:54.320> my

anything can be dry my career is my

anything can be dry my career is my
entire<00:21:54.880> life<00:21:55.120> i<00:21:55.200> live<00:21:55.360> it<00:21:55.520> i<00:21:55.600> breathe<00:21:55.840> ice<00:21:56.559> i

entire life i live it i breathe ice i

entire life i live it i breathe ice i
sweat<00:21:57.120> it<00:21:57.280> i<00:21:57.360> like<00:21:57.600> i<00:21:57.840> live

sweat it i like i live

sweat it i like i live
to<00:21:59.760> entertain<00:22:00.240> people<00:22:00.559> and<00:22:00.640> to<00:22:00.720> make<00:22:00.880> people

to entertain people and to make people

to entertain people and to make people
laugh<00:22:01.360> and<00:22:01.440> that's<00:22:01.600> what<00:22:01.679> i<00:22:01.760> do<00:22:01.919> for<00:22:02.080> a<00:22:02.159> living

laugh and that's what i do for a living

laugh and that's what i do for a living
i'm<00:22:02.640> really

i'm really

i'm really
grateful<00:22:03.760> to<00:22:04.240> be<00:22:04.400> able<00:22:04.559> to<00:22:04.640> do<00:22:04.720> this<00:22:04.880> for<00:22:04.960> a

grateful to be able to do this for a

grateful to be able to do this for a
living

i use a lot of words people know that

i use a lot of words people know that
already<00:22:10.640> about<00:22:10.880> me<00:22:11.120> if<00:22:11.200> they've<00:22:11.440> seen<00:22:11.679> any

already about me if they've seen any

already about me if they've seen any
drag<00:22:12.159> race<00:22:12.400> episodes<00:22:12.880> so<00:22:13.039> far

drag race episodes so far

drag race episodes so far
and<00:22:14.480> in<00:22:14.559> my<00:22:14.720> personal<00:22:15.039> life<00:22:15.280> i<00:22:15.360> used<00:22:15.520> a<00:22:15.600> lot<00:22:15.760> of

and in my personal life i used a lot of

and in my personal life i used a lot of
words

words

words
um<00:22:17.200> i<00:22:17.360> think<00:22:17.600> that<00:22:17.760> words<00:22:18.000> are<00:22:18.159> important<00:22:18.480> they

um i think that words are important they

um i think that words are important they
hold<00:22:18.799> a<00:22:18.799> lot<00:22:19.039> of<00:22:19.120> weight<00:22:19.440> and<00:22:19.600> value

hold a lot of weight and value

hold a lot of weight and value
so<00:22:21.039> i<00:22:21.200> like<00:22:21.360> to<00:22:21.520> try<00:22:21.840> new<00:22:22.080> self-esteem

so i like to try new self-esteem

so i like to try new self-esteem
building<00:22:23.039> words

building words

building words
and<00:22:26.000> and<00:22:26.159> i<00:22:26.240> think<00:22:26.400> a<00:22:26.480> lot<00:22:26.640> of<00:22:26.720> that<00:22:26.799> comes<00:22:27.039> from

and and i think a lot of that comes from

and and i think a lot of that comes from
growing<00:22:27.520> up<00:22:27.679> and<00:22:27.760> not<00:22:27.919> having<00:22:28.240> a<00:22:28.320> lot<00:22:28.480> of

growing up and not having a lot of

growing up and not having a lot of
self-esteem<00:22:29.200> building<00:22:29.840> uh

self-esteem building uh

self-esteem building uh
gestures<00:22:31.600> brought<00:22:31.840> to<00:22:32.000> me<00:22:32.159> within<00:22:32.480> my<00:22:32.640> own

gestures brought to me within my own

gestures brought to me within my own
family<00:22:33.200> as<00:22:33.360> an<00:22:33.440> adult<00:22:33.760> i<00:22:33.919> practice<00:22:34.400> so<00:22:35.039> you

family as an adult i practice so you

family as an adult i practice so you
might<00:22:35.679> see<00:22:35.840> my<00:22:36.000> hashtags<00:22:36.559> i<00:22:36.640> say<00:22:36.799> cosmic<00:22:37.280> love

might see my hashtags i say cosmic love

might see my hashtags i say cosmic love
cosmic<00:22:38.080> queen<00:22:38.320> i<00:22:38.480> talk<00:22:38.640> about

cosmic queen i talk about

cosmic queen i talk about
big<00:22:40.640> and<00:22:41.120> universal<00:22:41.840> love

big and universal love

big and universal love
and

and

and
when<00:22:44.880> i<00:22:44.960> describe<00:22:45.440> my<00:22:45.600> character

when i describe my character

when i describe my character
i<00:22:47.520> almost<00:22:48.000> associate<00:22:48.960> miss<00:22:49.280> fame<00:22:49.520> as

i almost associate miss fame as

i almost associate miss fame as
something<00:22:50.080> that's<00:22:50.320> not<00:22:50.640> human<00:22:51.440> that<00:22:51.760> she's

something that's not human that she's

something that's not human that she's
like<00:22:52.159> a<00:22:52.240> superhero<00:22:53.120> like<00:22:53.280> she's<00:22:53.520> beyond<00:22:53.919> this

like a superhero like she's beyond this

like a superhero like she's beyond this
planet<00:22:54.559> beautiful<00:22:55.440> um<00:22:56.159> you<00:22:56.320> know<00:22:56.480> the<00:22:56.640> boy<00:22:56.960> me

planet beautiful um you know the boy me

planet beautiful um you know the boy me
of<00:22:57.520> me<00:22:57.679> when<00:22:57.919> i'm<00:22:58.080> not<00:22:58.320> in<00:22:58.400> the<00:22:58.559> full<00:22:58.960> fantasy<00:22:59.600> i

of me when i'm not in the full fantasy i

of me when i'm not in the full fantasy i
feel<00:23:00.000> there's<00:23:00.400> a<00:23:00.559> sense<00:23:00.960> of<00:23:01.280> um

feel there's a sense of um

feel there's a sense of um
there's<00:23:03.600> just<00:23:03.840> a<00:23:03.919> bit<00:23:04.080> more<00:23:04.400> it's<00:23:04.559> transparent

there's just a bit more it's transparent

there's just a bit more it's transparent
it's<00:23:05.280> like<00:23:05.440> i<00:23:05.520> can't<00:23:05.679> there's<00:23:05.919> nothing<00:23:06.159> to

it's like i can't there's nothing to

it's like i can't there's nothing to
hide<00:23:06.480> behind<00:23:06.880> it's<00:23:07.120> me<00:23:07.360> it's<00:23:07.520> like<00:23:07.760> i'm

hide behind it's me it's like i'm

hide behind it's me it's like i'm
standing<00:23:08.240> before<00:23:08.559> you<00:23:08.880> when<00:23:09.120> i'm<00:23:09.280> curtis

standing before you when i'm curtis

standing before you when i'm curtis
and<00:23:10.799> i<00:23:11.520> you<00:23:11.760> see<00:23:12.080> my<00:23:12.240> quirkiness<00:23:13.200> the<00:23:13.360> things<00:23:13.600> i

and i you see my quirkiness the things i

and i you see my quirkiness the things i
might<00:23:13.840> find<00:23:14.080> insecure<00:23:14.559> about<00:23:14.720> myself<00:23:15.120> maybe

might find insecure about myself maybe

might find insecure about myself maybe
the<00:23:15.520> way<00:23:15.679> that<00:23:15.840> i<00:23:16.320> over<00:23:16.720> talk

the way that i over talk

the way that i over talk
or<00:23:18.080> i

or i

or i
feel

feel

feel
very

very

very
and<00:23:22.159> uh

and uh

and uh
and<00:23:23.360> i<00:23:23.440> think<00:23:23.679> about<00:23:24.000> that<00:23:24.320> and<00:23:24.480> then<00:23:24.640> i'm<00:23:24.720> like

and i think about that and then i'm like

and i think about that and then i'm like
i<00:23:25.200> wonder<00:23:25.440> what<00:23:25.520> they're<00:23:25.679> thinking<00:23:26.400> you<00:23:26.559> know

i wonder what they're thinking you know

i wonder what they're thinking you know
but<00:23:27.280> when<00:23:27.440> i<00:23:27.600> miss<00:23:27.840> fame<00:23:28.080> there's<00:23:28.240> such<00:23:28.400> an

but when i miss fame there's such an

but when i miss fame there's such an
assertiveness<00:23:29.520> and<00:23:29.600> an<00:23:30.080> ownership<00:23:31.120> so

assertiveness and an ownership so

assertiveness and an ownership so
those<00:23:32.080> both<00:23:32.320> reside<00:23:32.720> within<00:23:33.039> me<00:23:33.200> but<00:23:33.360> why<00:23:33.600> is

those both reside within me but why is

those both reside within me but why is
it<00:23:33.840> different<00:23:34.159> when<00:23:34.320> i<00:23:34.400> put<00:23:34.559> on<00:23:34.720> a<00:23:34.799> wig<00:23:35.120> versus

it different when i put on a wig versus

it different when i put on a wig versus
what<00:23:35.679> i'm<00:23:35.840> standing<00:23:36.080> before<00:23:36.480> you<00:23:36.640> as<00:23:36.880> myself

what i'm standing before you as myself

what i'm standing before you as myself
it's<00:23:38.080> like<00:23:38.559> i'm<00:23:38.799> able<00:23:38.960> to<00:23:39.120> do<00:23:39.360> both

it's like i'm able to do both

it's like i'm able to do both
it's<00:23:41.279> just<00:23:41.760> it<00:23:42.000> eliminates<00:23:42.559> a<00:23:42.720> lot<00:23:42.880> of<00:23:43.039> the

it's just it eliminates a lot of the

it's just it eliminates a lot of the
the<00:23:44.400> hesitation<00:23:45.440> when<00:23:45.600> i<00:23:45.760> miss<00:23:46.000> fame<00:23:46.240> i'm<00:23:46.320> able

the hesitation when i miss fame i'm able

the hesitation when i miss fame i'm able
to<00:23:46.640> just<00:23:46.880> hit<00:23:47.039> the<00:23:47.200> mark<00:23:47.520> and<00:23:47.679> it's<00:23:47.840> so<00:23:48.000> much

to just hit the mark and it's so much

to just hit the mark and it's so much
sharper<00:23:49.200> and<00:23:49.360> i<00:23:49.440> don't<00:23:49.600> think<00:23:49.840> about<00:23:50.080> it<00:23:50.240> i

sharper and i don't think about it i

sharper and i don't think about it i
just<00:23:50.480> do<00:23:50.640> it<00:23:50.799> and<00:23:50.880> i<00:23:50.960> respect<00:23:51.440> that<00:23:51.679> within

just do it and i respect that within

just do it and i respect that within
myself<00:23:52.799> i'm<00:23:52.960> trying<00:23:53.200> to<00:23:53.279> bridge<00:23:53.520> the<00:23:53.679> gap

myself i'm trying to bridge the gap

myself i'm trying to bridge the gap
still<00:23:54.240> like<00:23:54.559> how<00:23:54.720> is<00:23:54.880> that<00:23:55.039> possible<00:23:55.600> i<00:23:55.840> still

still like how is that possible i still

still like how is that possible i still
question<00:23:56.400> it<00:23:56.480> myself

question it myself

question it myself
i<00:23:58.159> think<00:23:58.480> claiming<00:23:59.039> words

i think claiming words

i think claiming words
like<00:24:01.120> i<00:24:01.279> don't<00:24:01.360> want<00:24:01.520> to<00:24:01.679> claim<00:24:01.919> the<00:24:02.000> word

like i don't want to claim the word

like i don't want to claim the word
i i<00:24:03.360> don't<00:24:03.679> i<00:24:03.840> don't<00:24:04.000> use<00:24:04.240> it<00:24:04.400> in<00:24:04.480> my<00:24:04.640> own

i i don't i don't use it in my own

i i don't i don't use it in my own
language<00:24:05.520> so<00:24:06.159> if<00:24:06.559> that's<00:24:06.960> to<00:24:07.120> his<00:24:07.440> her<00:24:07.679> own<00:24:08.320> or

language so if that's to his her own or

language so if that's to his her own or
if<00:24:08.720> that's<00:24:08.960> the<00:24:09.120> statement<00:24:09.840> it's<00:24:10.080> really<00:24:10.320> a

if that's the statement it's really a

if that's the statement it's really a
personal<00:24:11.120> journey<00:24:11.760> there's<00:24:12.080> a<00:24:12.159> lot<00:24:12.320> of<00:24:12.400> words

personal journey there's a lot of words

personal journey there's a lot of words
i<00:24:12.880> don't<00:24:13.039> use<00:24:13.360> because<00:24:13.679> i<00:24:13.760> know<00:24:13.919> that<00:24:14.080> they

i don't use because i know that they

i don't use because i know that they
carry<00:24:14.640> weight

carry weight

carry weight
and<00:24:15.760> i<00:24:15.919> respect<00:24:16.559> people's<00:24:17.039> path<00:24:18.159> so

and i respect people's path so

and i respect people's path so
i'm<00:24:19.440> not<00:24:19.679> trying<00:24:19.919> to<00:24:20.080> cross<00:24:20.480> and<00:24:20.640> be

i'm not trying to cross and be

i'm not trying to cross and be
controversial<00:24:21.440> that's<00:24:21.679> not<00:24:21.840> really<00:24:22.080> the<00:24:22.240> way

controversial that's not really the way

controversial that's not really the way
that<00:24:22.480> i<00:24:22.559> conduct<00:24:22.880> myself<00:24:23.279> on<00:24:23.360> a<00:24:23.440> daily<00:24:23.760> basis

that i conduct myself on a daily basis

that i conduct myself on a daily basis
there's<00:24:24.320> certain<00:24:24.480> things<00:24:24.720> i<00:24:24.880> stand<00:24:25.120> by<00:24:25.279> and

there's certain things i stand by and

there's certain things i stand by and
there's<00:24:25.520> certain<00:24:25.760> things<00:24:26.000> that<00:24:26.080> i<00:24:26.240> try<00:24:26.400> not<00:24:26.559> to

there's certain things that i try not to

there's certain things that i try not to
get<00:24:26.799> involved<00:24:27.200> with<00:24:27.679> because<00:24:28.000> i<00:24:28.080> know<00:24:28.240> that

get involved with because i know that

get involved with because i know that
they're<00:24:28.640> highly<00:24:28.960> sensitive<00:24:29.440> topics<00:24:30.000> and<00:24:30.240> i

they're highly sensitive topics and i

they're highly sensitive topics and i
can't<00:24:30.559> speak<00:24:30.880> on<00:24:31.120> behalf<00:24:31.520> of<00:24:31.679> that<00:24:31.919> so<00:24:32.080> i<00:24:32.240> don't

can't speak on behalf of that so i don't

can't speak on behalf of that so i don't
necessarily<00:24:33.120> understand<00:24:33.760> every<00:24:34.559> background

necessarily understand every background

necessarily understand every background
but<00:24:35.279> i<00:24:35.440> try<00:24:35.600> to<00:24:35.760> listen

but i try to listen

but i try to listen
to<00:24:37.679> what<00:24:37.919> they're<00:24:38.080> talking<00:24:38.480> about<00:24:38.960> when

to what they're talking about when

to what they're talking about when
they're<00:24:39.520> saying<00:24:39.760> this<00:24:40.159> affects<00:24:40.559> me<00:24:40.720> in<00:24:40.799> this

they're saying this affects me in this

they're saying this affects me in this
way<00:24:41.520> because<00:24:41.840> it<00:24:41.919> makes<00:24:42.240> me<00:24:42.480> feel<00:24:42.720> like

way because it makes me feel like

way because it makes me feel like
this

this

this
doesn't<00:24:44.880> make<00:24:44.960> me<00:24:45.120> feel<00:24:45.279> respected<00:24:45.760> when<00:24:45.919> you

doesn't make me feel respected when you

doesn't make me feel respected when you
use<00:24:46.320> that<00:24:46.799> transphobic

use that transphobic

use that transphobic
term<00:24:48.640> somebody<00:24:48.960> else<00:24:49.120> might<00:24:49.279> not<00:24:49.440> have<00:24:49.600> known

term somebody else might not have known

term somebody else might not have known
that<00:24:49.919> was<00:24:50.080> transphobic<00:24:50.720> before

that was transphobic before

that was transphobic before
so<00:24:52.080> i've<00:24:52.320> realized<00:24:52.799> that<00:24:53.120> it's<00:24:53.440> been<00:24:54.000> there's

so i've realized that it's been there's

so i've realized that it's been there's
a lot<00:24:54.400> of<00:24:54.559> evolution<00:24:55.039> that's<00:24:55.279> always<00:24:55.600> it's

a lot of evolution that's always it's

a lot of evolution that's always it's
happening<00:24:56.080> right<00:24:56.320> now<00:24:57.039> things<00:24:57.279> are<00:24:57.360> changing

happening right now things are changing

happening right now things are changing
that<00:24:57.919> we<00:24:58.159> might<00:24:58.320> have<00:24:58.400> said<00:24:58.559> something<00:24:58.960> a<00:24:59.039> year

that we might have said something a year

that we might have said something a year
ago<00:24:59.440> that<00:24:59.600> was<00:24:59.760> not<00:24:59.919> an<00:25:00.080> issue<00:25:00.320> that's<00:25:00.640> now<00:25:00.880> an

ago that was not an issue that's now an

ago that was not an issue that's now an
issue

issue

issue
and<00:25:02.159> so<00:25:02.320> we<00:25:02.400> have<00:25:02.559> to<00:25:02.640> be<00:25:02.720> more<00:25:02.960> mindful<00:25:03.360> about

and so we have to be more mindful about

and so we have to be more mindful about
the<00:25:04.240> sensitivities

the sensitivities

the sensitivities
but

but

but
it's<00:25:07.120> hard<00:25:07.360> to<00:25:07.440> keep<00:25:07.679> up<00:25:07.760> with<00:25:08.400> because

it's hard to keep up with because

it's hard to keep up with because
they're<00:25:09.120> changing<00:25:09.520> every<00:25:09.760> day<00:25:10.000> so<00:25:10.159> sometimes

they're changing every day so sometimes

they're changing every day so sometimes
you<00:25:10.720> might<00:25:10.960> have<00:25:11.039> thought<00:25:11.279> oh<00:25:11.440> i<00:25:11.600> put<00:25:11.760> that<00:25:11.919> on

you might have thought oh i put that on

you might have thought oh i put that on
a<00:25:12.080> social<00:25:12.400> media<00:25:12.640> post<00:25:12.960> i<00:25:13.039> was<00:25:13.200> not<00:25:13.440> trying<00:25:13.600> to

a social media post i was not trying to

a social media post i was not trying to
be<00:25:14.320> controversial<00:25:15.360> and<00:25:15.520> now<00:25:15.679> there's<00:25:15.840> an

be controversial and now there's an

be controversial and now there's an
issue<00:25:16.320> around<00:25:16.640> it

issue around it

issue around it
and

and

and
you<00:25:18.159> know<00:25:18.559> so<00:25:18.799> it's<00:25:19.440> whether<00:25:19.679> it's

you know so it's whether it's

you know so it's whether it's
transphobic<00:25:20.880> homophobic

transphobic homophobic

transphobic homophobic
race<00:25:22.720> related<00:25:23.600> uh<00:25:24.159> gender<00:25:24.880> it's<00:25:25.039> like<00:25:25.679> it's

race related uh gender it's like it's

race related uh gender it's like it's
really<00:25:26.240> really<00:25:26.640> um

really really um

really really um
i'm<00:25:27.840> being<00:25:28.080> really<00:25:28.320> delicate<00:25:28.720> around<00:25:28.880> that

i'm being really delicate around that

i'm being really delicate around that
because<00:25:29.279> i<00:25:29.440> know<00:25:29.600> that<00:25:29.760> there<00:25:29.919> is<00:25:30.080> a<00:25:30.159> lot<00:25:30.240> of

because i know that there is a lot of

because i know that there is a lot of
controversy<00:25:30.960> around<00:25:31.360> every<00:25:31.600> topic<00:25:32.000> i<00:25:32.080> just

controversy around every topic i just

controversy around every topic i just
said<00:25:32.960> always<00:25:33.360> and<00:25:33.520> it's<00:25:33.760> always<00:25:33.919> going<00:25:34.000> to<00:25:34.080> be

said always and it's always going to be

said always and it's always going to be
like<00:25:34.400> that<00:25:34.880> being<00:25:35.120> a<00:25:35.279> performer<00:25:35.840> in<00:25:35.919> new<00:25:36.080> york

like that being a performer in new york

like that being a performer in new york
has<00:25:37.120> changed

has changed

has changed
everything<00:25:39.679> for<00:25:39.919> me<00:25:40.159> i<00:25:40.320> don't<00:25:40.400> know<00:25:40.559> if<00:25:40.720> you

everything for me i don't know if you

everything for me i don't know if you
can<00:25:40.960> tell<00:25:41.200> by<00:25:41.440> the<00:25:41.919> articulation<00:25:42.720> in<00:25:42.880> my<00:25:43.039> voice

can tell by the articulation in my voice

can tell by the articulation in my voice
i<00:25:43.520> am<00:25:43.840> southern

i am southern

i am southern
uh<00:25:45.279> i<00:25:45.440> am<00:25:45.760> from<00:25:46.159> western<00:25:46.480> north<00:25:46.720> carolina<00:25:47.520> and

uh i am from western north carolina and

uh i am from western north carolina and
moving<00:25:48.640> from<00:25:48.880> the<00:25:49.039> mountains<00:25:49.440> to<00:25:49.679> here<00:25:50.240> and

moving from the mountains to here and

moving from the mountains to here and
also<00:25:50.960> being<00:25:51.279> able<00:25:51.520> to<00:25:51.760> express

also being able to express

also being able to express
my<00:25:53.440> sexuality<00:25:54.080> and<00:25:54.240> gender<00:25:54.640> how<00:25:54.799> i<00:25:54.960> want

my sexuality and gender how i want

my sexuality and gender how i want
because<00:25:55.600> my<00:25:55.760> family<00:25:56.159> isn't<00:25:56.400> around<00:25:57.120> uh

because my family isn't around uh

because my family isn't around uh
changed<00:25:57.840> everything<00:25:58.159> for<00:25:58.320> me<00:25:58.559> and<00:25:58.960> i

changed everything for me and i

changed everything for me and i
actually<00:26:00.559> followed<00:26:00.880> switch<00:26:01.200> and<00:26:01.279> play<00:26:01.520> around

actually followed switch and play around

actually followed switch and play around
for<00:26:02.080> a<00:26:02.159> solid<00:26:02.559> year<00:26:03.200> before<00:26:03.760> they<00:26:04.240> let<00:26:04.400> me<00:26:04.640> into

for a solid year before they let me into

for a solid year before they let me into
the<00:26:04.960> group

the group

the group
uh<00:26:06.080> now<00:26:06.240> they're<00:26:06.480> stuck<00:26:06.799> with<00:26:06.960> me<00:26:07.440> being<00:26:07.679> in

uh now they're stuck with me being in

uh now they're stuck with me being in
new<00:26:07.919> york<00:26:08.159> it<00:26:08.240> changes<00:26:08.640> everything<00:26:09.039> and<00:26:09.360> when

new york it changes everything and when

new york it changes everything and when
you<00:26:09.679> talk<00:26:09.919> to<00:26:10.080> other<00:26:10.320> kings<00:26:11.120> from<00:26:11.360> out<00:26:11.520> of<00:26:11.679> town

you talk to other kings from out of town

you talk to other kings from out of town
or<00:26:12.480> talk<00:26:12.640> to<00:26:12.720> other<00:26:12.960> kings<00:26:13.200> online<00:26:13.440> and<00:26:13.600> you

or talk to other kings online and you

or talk to other kings online and you
say<00:26:13.840> oh<00:26:14.000> i<00:26:14.080> perform<00:26:14.480> in<00:26:14.640> new<00:26:14.799> york

say oh i perform in new york

say oh i perform in new york
it's<00:26:15.760> a<00:26:15.840> big<00:26:16.080> deal<00:26:16.480> i<00:26:16.559> mean<00:26:16.799> it's<00:26:17.360> even<00:26:17.600> if<00:26:18.000> what

it's a big deal i mean it's even if what

it's a big deal i mean it's even if what
you're<00:26:18.320> doing<00:26:18.640> is<00:26:18.720> the<00:26:18.880> same<00:26:19.279> sort<00:26:19.520> of

you're doing is the same sort of

you're doing is the same sort of
situation<00:26:20.240> what<00:26:20.400> they're<00:26:20.640> doing<00:26:21.200> being<00:26:21.440> in

situation what they're doing being in

situation what they're doing being in
new<00:26:21.679> york<00:26:22.000> makes<00:26:22.320> it

new york makes it

new york makes it
so<00:26:23.200> much<00:26:23.360> more<00:26:23.520> glamorous<00:26:24.080> we

so much more glamorous we

so much more glamorous we
encounter<00:26:25.360> like<00:26:25.520> a<00:26:25.600> wide<00:26:25.840> variety<00:26:26.159> of

encounter like a wide variety of

encounter like a wide variety of
audiences<00:26:27.279> you<00:26:27.360> know<00:26:27.520> so<00:26:27.840> if<00:26:28.240> we<00:26:28.320> were<00:26:28.480> in<00:26:28.559> a

audiences you know so if we were in a

audiences you know so if we were in a
smaller<00:26:28.960> town<00:26:29.200> it<00:26:29.279> may<00:26:29.440> be<00:26:29.600> the<00:26:29.760> same<00:26:30.000> people

smaller town it may be the same people

smaller town it may be the same people
coming<00:26:30.640> to<00:26:31.279> our<00:26:31.440> performances<00:26:32.240> you<00:26:32.400> know

coming to our performances you know

coming to our performances you know
every<00:26:33.520> night<00:26:33.760> but<00:26:34.000> we<00:26:34.240> have<00:26:34.720> our<00:26:35.120> crowd<00:26:35.520> here

every night but we have our crowd here

every night but we have our crowd here
at<00:26:36.799> this<00:26:37.120> bar<00:26:37.360> that<00:26:37.520> we<00:26:37.679> perform<00:26:38.080> every<00:26:38.640> uh

at this bar that we perform every uh

at this bar that we perform every uh
month<00:26:39.600> we<00:26:39.760> have<00:26:39.919> another<00:26:40.400> weekly<00:26:40.799> performance

month we have another weekly performance

month we have another weekly performance
that<00:26:41.520> has<00:26:41.679> another<00:26:42.000> crowd<00:26:42.480> we<00:26:43.120> um<00:26:43.440> have

that has another crowd we um have

that has another crowd we um have
different<00:26:44.080> gigs<00:26:44.320> throughout<00:26:44.640> the<00:26:44.720> city<00:26:44.960> and

different gigs throughout the city and

different gigs throughout the city and
you'll<00:26:45.360> get<00:26:45.520> a<00:26:45.600> different<00:26:45.840> crowd<00:26:46.159> at<00:26:46.240> every

you'll get a different crowd at every

you'll get a different crowd at every
single<00:26:46.720> one<00:26:47.279> and<00:26:47.520> so<00:26:47.919> that's<00:26:48.320> not<00:26:48.480> only<00:26:48.799> great

single one and so that's not only great

single one and so that's not only great
because<00:26:49.760> you<00:26:50.240> can<00:26:50.559> come<00:26:50.720> up<00:26:50.799> with<00:26:50.960> different

because you can come up with different

because you can come up with different
acts<00:26:51.600> for<00:26:51.679> the<00:26:51.760> different<00:26:52.000> crowd<00:26:52.400> they<00:26:52.480> can

acts for the different crowd they can

acts for the different crowd they can
respond<00:26:53.200> in<00:26:53.279> different<00:26:53.600> ways<00:26:53.919> but

respond in different ways but

respond in different ways but
it's<00:26:54.880> also<00:26:55.120> great<00:26:55.360> because<00:26:55.679> if<00:26:55.840> we're<00:26:56.080> trying

it's also great because if we're trying

it's also great because if we're trying
to<00:26:56.400> spread<00:26:56.799> the<00:26:57.120> drag<00:26:57.440> king<00:26:57.679> gospel<00:26:58.080> here<00:26:58.559> it's

to spread the drag king gospel here it's

to spread the drag king gospel here it's
reaching<00:26:59.360> a<00:26:59.440> really<00:26:59.760> wide<00:27:00.080> audience<00:27:00.880> and<00:27:01.520> a

reaching a really wide audience and a

reaching a really wide audience and a
really<00:27:02.240> varied<00:27:02.640> audience<00:27:03.120> and<00:27:03.200> a<00:27:03.279> lot<00:27:03.440> of

really varied audience and a lot of

really varied audience and a lot of
different<00:27:03.760> kinds<00:27:04.080> of<00:27:04.159> people<00:27:04.559> from<00:27:04.720> a<00:27:04.720> lot<00:27:04.880> of

different kinds of people from a lot of

different kinds of people from a lot of
different<00:27:05.120> kinds<00:27:05.360> of<00:27:05.440> places

different kinds of places

different kinds of places
and<00:27:06.640> i<00:27:06.799> think

and i think

and i think
being<00:27:07.760> in<00:27:07.840> new<00:27:08.000> york<00:27:08.159> city<00:27:08.400> has<00:27:08.559> definitely

being in new york city has definitely

being in new york city has definitely
allowed<00:27:09.200> me<00:27:09.360> to

allowed me to

allowed me to
explore<00:27:10.559> my<00:27:10.720> gender

explore my gender

explore my gender
and<00:27:12.320> also<00:27:12.720> just<00:27:12.960> to<00:27:13.279> explore<00:27:14.000> drag

and also just to explore drag

and also just to explore drag
in<00:27:15.039> general<00:27:15.600> i<00:27:15.760> kind<00:27:15.919> of<00:27:16.000> had<00:27:16.159> a<00:27:16.240> vague<00:27:16.640> idea<00:27:16.880> of

in general i kind of had a vague idea of

in general i kind of had a vague idea of
what<00:27:17.200> drag<00:27:17.440> was<00:27:17.679> before<00:27:17.919> moving<00:27:18.159> here<00:27:18.799> and

what drag was before moving here and

what drag was before moving here and
then<00:27:19.039> i<00:27:19.200> moved<00:27:19.440> in<00:27:19.679> with<00:27:20.000> one<00:27:20.159> of<00:27:20.240> the<00:27:20.320> founding

then i moved in with one of the founding

then i moved in with one of the founding
members<00:27:20.960> of<00:27:21.120> switch<00:27:21.360> and<00:27:21.440> play<00:27:22.080> and<00:27:22.240> then<00:27:22.559> it

members of switch and play and then it

members of switch and play and then it
all<00:27:22.880> just<00:27:23.120> changed<00:27:23.360> from<00:27:23.520> there

all just changed from there

all just changed from there
kind<00:27:24.640> of<00:27:24.799> having<00:27:25.520> this<00:27:25.760> be<00:27:26.000> such<00:27:26.240> a<00:27:26.320> busy

kind of having this be such a busy

kind of having this be such a busy
city<00:27:27.600> you<00:27:27.679> can<00:27:27.840> either<00:27:28.159> blend<00:27:28.480> in<00:27:28.960> but<00:27:29.120> if<00:27:29.200> you

city you can either blend in but if you

city you can either blend in but if you
don't<00:27:29.440> want<00:27:29.600> to<00:27:29.679> blend<00:27:29.919> in<00:27:30.159> you<00:27:30.240> kind<00:27:30.399> of<00:27:30.480> have

don't want to blend in you kind of have

don't want to blend in you kind of have
to<00:27:30.640> be<00:27:30.799> outrageous<00:27:31.520> but<00:27:31.679> like<00:27:32.080> you<00:27:32.159> can<00:27:32.320> blend

to be outrageous but like you can blend

to be outrageous but like you can blend
in<00:27:32.640> for<00:27:32.799> a<00:27:32.799> little<00:27:33.039> while<00:27:33.919> kind<00:27:34.159> of<00:27:34.320> be<00:27:34.480> like<00:27:34.640> i

in for a little while kind of be like i

in for a little while kind of be like i
need<00:27:35.120> to<00:27:35.279> you<00:27:35.440> know<00:27:35.520> solidify<00:27:36.159> what<00:27:36.320> i<00:27:36.399> think

need to you know solidify what i think

need to you know solidify what i think
i'm<00:27:36.799> going<00:27:36.960> to<00:27:37.039> be<00:27:37.200> doing<00:27:37.600> and<00:27:37.679> then<00:27:37.919> just

i'm going to be doing and then just

i'm going to be doing and then just
bust<00:27:39.200> out

bust out

bust out
me<00:27:40.399> having<00:27:40.559> chest<00:27:40.799> surgery<00:27:41.120> kind<00:27:41.279> of<00:27:41.440> um

me having chest surgery kind of um

me having chest surgery kind of um
confuses<00:27:42.399> some<00:27:42.640> people<00:27:43.279> because

confuses some people because

confuses some people because
for<00:27:44.240> one<00:27:44.399> number<00:27:44.720> i<00:27:44.880> tear<00:27:45.120> my<00:27:45.200> shirt<00:27:45.440> open

for one number i tear my shirt open

for one number i tear my shirt open
they're<00:27:45.760> like<00:27:46.000> how<00:27:46.159> did<00:27:46.399> how<00:27:46.559> did<00:27:46.720> they<00:27:46.799> do

they're like how did how did they do

they're like how did how did they do
that

that

that
i<00:27:47.919> was<00:27:48.000> like<00:27:48.159> that's<00:27:48.399> amazing<00:27:48.799> i<00:27:48.880> was<00:27:48.960> like

i was like that's amazing i was like

i was like that's amazing i was like
actually<00:27:49.440> i<00:27:49.600> i<00:27:49.760> cheated<00:27:50.080> i<00:27:50.240> had<00:27:50.320> surgeries

actually i i cheated i had surgeries

actually i i cheated i had surgeries
but<00:27:52.960> yeah

but yeah

but yeah
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
i<00:27:54.960> don't<00:27:55.039> know

i identify with the label of

i identify with the label of
a<00:28:01.360> woman<00:28:01.919> a<00:28:02.000> stepmom<00:28:02.960> a<00:28:03.039> wife

a woman a stepmom a wife

a woman a stepmom a wife
a<00:28:04.320> sister

a sister

a sister
and<00:28:05.440> an<00:28:05.600> entertainer

and an entertainer

and an entertainer
i<00:28:07.840> suppressed<00:28:08.240> my<00:28:08.480> femininity<00:28:08.960> for<00:28:09.200> so<00:28:09.520> long

i suppressed my femininity for so long

i suppressed my femininity for so long
and<00:28:09.919> i<00:28:10.080> tried<00:28:10.399> my<00:28:10.559> best<00:28:10.799> to<00:28:10.960> like<00:28:11.440> learn<00:28:11.919> how

and i tried my best to like learn how

and i tried my best to like learn how
other

other

other
men<00:28:14.080> i<00:28:14.240> guess

men i guess

men i guess
what<00:28:15.200> was<00:28:15.520> expected<00:28:15.919> from<00:28:16.080> them<00:28:16.399> and<00:28:16.640> and<00:28:16.799> what

what was expected from them and and what

what was expected from them and and what
was<00:28:17.600> attractive<00:28:18.080> to<00:28:18.240> other<00:28:18.480> people<00:28:18.799> so<00:28:19.039> that

was attractive to other people so that

was attractive to other people so that
because<00:28:19.440> i<00:28:19.600> knew<00:28:19.840> in<00:28:19.919> the<00:28:20.000> back<00:28:20.159> of<00:28:20.240> my<00:28:20.320> head

because i knew in the back of my head

because i knew in the back of my head
there<00:28:20.640> was<00:28:20.720> still<00:28:20.880> this<00:28:21.039> party<00:28:21.279> i<00:28:21.360> was<00:28:21.440> like

there was still this party i was like

there was still this party i was like
well<00:28:21.760> if<00:28:21.919> i'm<00:28:22.080> attractive<00:28:22.559> people

well if i'm attractive people

well if i'm attractive people
will<00:28:24.159> accept<00:28:24.480> me<00:28:24.640> it'll<00:28:24.880> be<00:28:25.039> easier<00:28:25.760> you<00:28:25.919> know

will accept me it'll be easier you know

will accept me it'll be easier you know
so<00:28:26.240> i<00:28:26.320> kind<00:28:26.480> of<00:28:26.640> grew<00:28:26.880> up<00:28:27.120> forcing<00:28:27.520> myself<00:28:28.000> to

so i kind of grew up forcing myself to

so i kind of grew up forcing myself to
learn<00:28:28.559> like<00:28:29.039> this<00:28:29.279> is<00:28:29.360> what<00:28:29.520> attractive<00:28:29.919> men

learn like this is what attractive men

learn like this is what attractive men
look<00:28:30.320> like<00:28:30.480> and<00:28:30.559> this<00:28:30.720> is<00:28:30.880> how<00:28:31.440> people<00:28:31.679> like<00:28:31.840> to

look like and this is how people like to

look like and this is how people like to
see<00:28:32.080> attractive<00:28:32.559> looking<00:28:32.799> men<00:28:33.120> okay<00:28:33.440> so<00:28:33.600> i

see attractive looking men okay so i

see attractive looking men okay so i
guess<00:28:33.840> this<00:28:34.000> is<00:28:34.080> what<00:28:34.240> i'm<00:28:34.320> gonna<00:28:34.480> have<00:28:34.559> to<00:28:34.640> do

guess this is what i'm gonna have to do

guess this is what i'm gonna have to do
i'm<00:28:34.960> gonna<00:28:35.039> have<00:28:35.120> to<00:28:35.279> wear<00:28:35.520> this<00:28:36.080> in<00:28:36.240> order<00:28:36.480> to

i'm gonna have to wear this in order to

i'm gonna have to wear this in order to
be<00:28:36.640> able<00:28:36.799> to<00:28:36.880> interact<00:28:37.200> with<00:28:37.360> these<00:28:37.520> people

be able to interact with these people

be able to interact with these people
i'm<00:28:38.080> afraid<00:28:38.399> they're<00:28:38.480> never<00:28:38.720> gonna

i'm afraid they're never gonna

i'm afraid they're never gonna
understand<00:28:39.440> me<00:28:39.600> if<00:28:39.760> i<00:28:40.080> say<00:28:40.399> you<00:28:40.559> know<00:28:40.640> hey<00:28:40.799> i

understand me if i say you know hey i

understand me if i say you know hey i
wish<00:28:41.120> i<00:28:41.200> could<00:28:41.279> wake<00:28:41.520> up<00:28:41.600> tomorrow<00:28:41.919> as<00:28:42.080> a<00:28:42.159> girl

wish i could wake up tomorrow as a girl

wish i could wake up tomorrow as a girl
you<00:28:42.720> know<00:28:42.799> like<00:28:43.039> i<00:28:43.120> used<00:28:43.279> to<00:28:43.440> say<00:28:43.600> to<00:28:43.679> like<00:28:43.840> my

you know like i used to say to like my

you know like i used to say to like my
sister<00:28:44.559> you<00:28:44.640> know<00:28:44.720> there's<00:28:44.960> still<00:28:45.120> a<00:28:45.200> part<00:28:45.520> of

sister you know there's still a part of

sister you know there's still a part of
me

me

me
that<00:28:46.640> hasn't<00:28:47.120> changed<00:28:47.840> um<00:28:48.399> when<00:28:48.559> i<00:28:48.640> used<00:28:48.880> to

that hasn't changed um when i used to

that hasn't changed um when i used to
even<00:28:49.760> when<00:28:49.840> i<00:28:49.919> was<00:28:50.000> confused<00:28:50.320> about<00:28:50.480> my<00:28:50.640> own

even when i was confused about my own

even when i was confused about my own
gender<00:28:50.960> identity<00:28:51.360> you<00:28:51.440> know<00:28:51.520> there's<00:28:51.760> still

gender identity you know there's still

gender identity you know there's still
this<00:28:52.559> side<00:28:52.799> this<00:28:53.039> part<00:28:53.279> of<00:28:53.360> my<00:28:53.440> personality

this side this part of my personality

this side this part of my personality
that's<00:28:54.720> genderless<00:28:55.360> that's<00:28:55.600> more<00:28:55.840> about

that's genderless that's more about

that's genderless that's more about
like<00:28:56.960> i<00:28:57.120> want<00:28:57.279> to<00:28:57.360> watch<00:28:57.679> other<00:28:57.840> people

like i want to watch other people

like i want to watch other people
entertain<00:28:58.559> i<00:28:58.640> want<00:28:58.720> to<00:28:58.799> see<00:28:58.960> how<00:28:59.120> they<00:28:59.200> did

entertain i want to see how they did

entertain i want to see how they did
their<00:28:59.520> makeup<00:28:59.840> i<00:28:59.919> want<00:29:00.000> to<00:29:00.159> see<00:29:00.320> what<00:29:00.480> color

their makeup i want to see what color

their makeup i want to see what color
choices<00:29:01.120> they<00:29:01.279> use<00:29:01.520> like<00:29:01.679> i'm<00:29:01.840> so<00:29:02.000> specific

choices they use like i'm so specific

choices they use like i'm so specific
and<00:29:02.559> me<00:29:02.720> and<00:29:02.799> my<00:29:02.880> friends<00:29:03.120> are<00:29:03.200> all<00:29:03.360> kind<00:29:03.520> of

and me and my friends are all kind of

and me and my friends are all kind of
like<00:29:03.760> that<00:29:03.919> well<00:29:04.080> there<00:29:04.240> are<00:29:04.320> people<00:29:04.559> out

like that well there are people out

like that well there are people out
there<00:29:04.799> that<00:29:05.039> like<00:29:05.440> to

there that like to

there that like to
divide<00:29:06.880> it<00:29:07.279> up<00:29:07.520> and<00:29:07.760> dissect<00:29:08.399> it<00:29:08.559> and<00:29:08.799> kind<00:29:08.960> of

divide it up and dissect it and kind of

divide it up and dissect it and kind of
say<00:29:09.520> like<00:29:09.760> you<00:29:09.919> know<00:29:10.000> if<00:29:10.159> you're<00:29:10.320> going<00:29:10.399> to<00:29:10.480> do

say like you know if you're going to do

say like you know if you're going to do
drag<00:29:10.960> then<00:29:11.120> you<00:29:11.279> have<00:29:11.520> to<00:29:11.760> be

drag then you have to be

drag then you have to be
um<00:29:13.279> a<00:29:13.440> cisgender<00:29:14.080> male<00:29:14.480> who<00:29:14.640> performs<00:29:15.120> as

um a cisgender male who performs as

um a cisgender male who performs as
female<00:29:15.679> or<00:29:15.760> whatever<00:29:16.080> or<00:29:16.240> gives<00:29:16.399> that

female or whatever or gives that

female or whatever or gives that
illusion<00:29:16.960> of<00:29:17.039> a<00:29:17.120> female<00:29:17.440> but<00:29:17.840> i<00:29:17.919> think<00:29:18.080> that's

illusion of a female but i think that's

illusion of a female but i think that's
just<00:29:18.559> like<00:29:18.720> defining<00:29:19.200> it<00:29:19.360> too<00:29:19.600> much<00:29:20.159> i've<00:29:20.320> kind

just like defining it too much i've kind

just like defining it too much i've kind
of<00:29:20.720> always

of always

of always
seen<00:29:22.320> myself<00:29:22.640> as<00:29:22.799> some

seen myself as some

seen myself as some
sort<00:29:24.080> of<00:29:24.240> activist<00:29:24.880> because<00:29:25.200> when<00:29:25.679> i<00:29:26.159> would

sort of activist because when i would

sort of activist because when i would
come<00:29:26.559> out<00:29:26.720> and<00:29:26.799> perform<00:29:27.200> i<00:29:27.279> would<00:29:27.440> use<00:29:27.679> the

come out and perform i would use the

come out and perform i would use the
stage<00:29:28.720> as<00:29:29.039> my<00:29:29.600> moment<00:29:30.000> of<00:29:30.159> freedom<00:29:30.720> where<00:29:30.960> i

stage as my moment of freedom where i

stage as my moment of freedom where i
can<00:29:31.440> express<00:29:31.919> myself<00:29:32.399> in<00:29:32.559> a<00:29:32.640> safe<00:29:32.960> place<00:29:33.440> and<00:29:33.520> i

can express myself in a safe place and i

can express myself in a safe place and i
kind<00:29:33.760> of<00:29:33.840> mixed<00:29:34.080> it<00:29:34.240> with<00:29:34.399> my<00:29:34.559> creativity<00:29:35.440> for

kind of mixed it with my creativity for

kind of mixed it with my creativity for
me<00:29:35.760> growing<00:29:36.080> up

me growing up

me growing up
in<00:29:37.120> the<00:29:37.520> club<00:29:37.840> scene

in the club scene

in the club scene
you<00:29:38.960> know<00:29:39.360> you<00:29:39.600> shared<00:29:39.919> the<00:29:40.080> stage<00:29:40.559> with

you know you shared the stage with

you know you shared the stage with
people<00:29:41.679> that<00:29:41.919> identified<00:29:42.799> totally

people that identified totally

people that identified totally
differently<00:29:43.520> with<00:29:43.679> their<00:29:43.840> gender<00:29:44.559> you<00:29:44.720> know

differently with their gender you know

differently with their gender you know
it<00:29:45.360> didn't<00:29:45.600> really<00:29:45.919> matter<00:29:46.240> it<00:29:46.320> was<00:29:46.399> kind<00:29:46.559> of

it didn't really matter it was kind of

it didn't really matter it was kind of
about<00:29:47.039> what<00:29:47.360> character<00:29:47.760> you<00:29:47.919> bring<00:29:48.080> to<00:29:48.240> the

about what character you bring to the

about what character you bring to the
stage<00:29:48.720> and

stage and

stage and
how<00:29:49.840> you<00:29:50.080> celebrate<00:29:50.640> and<00:29:50.720> express<00:29:51.120> yourself

how you celebrate and express yourself

how you celebrate and express yourself
and<00:29:51.919> that<00:29:52.159> character

and that character

and that character
identify<00:29:53.760> as<00:29:53.919> a<00:29:54.000> trans<00:29:54.320> woman

identify as a trans woman

identify as a trans woman
i<00:29:56.080> identify<00:29:56.720> as<00:29:56.880> a<00:29:57.039> spiritualist<00:29:58.159> sometimes<00:29:58.559> a

i identify as a spiritualist sometimes a

i identify as a spiritualist sometimes a
mystic

mystic

mystic
um

um

um
identifies<00:30:01.600> as<00:30:01.760> a<00:30:01.840> riot<00:30:02.159> girl

identifies as a riot girl

identifies as a riot girl
that's<00:30:04.000> probably<00:30:04.399> those<00:30:04.559> are<00:30:04.640> probably<00:30:04.960> some

that's probably those are probably some

that's probably those are probably some
of<00:30:05.200> the<00:30:05.360> words<00:30:05.600> i<00:30:05.679> would<00:30:05.840> use<00:30:06.159> i<00:30:06.480> don't<00:30:06.559> think

of the words i would use i don't think

of the words i would use i don't think
any<00:30:06.960> two<00:30:07.200> transitions<00:30:07.679> are<00:30:07.919> necessarily

any two transitions are necessarily

any two transitions are necessarily
alike<00:30:08.799> but<00:30:09.039> my<00:30:09.200> transition<00:30:09.919> is<00:30:10.240> uh<00:30:10.880> unique<00:30:11.440> in

alike but my transition is uh unique in

alike but my transition is uh unique in
that<00:30:12.080> it<00:30:12.320> spanned<00:30:12.640> a<00:30:12.720> really<00:30:12.960> long<00:30:13.200> time<00:30:13.600> i

that it spanned a really long time i

that it spanned a really long time i
came<00:30:14.080> out<00:30:14.320> as<00:30:14.720> trans<00:30:15.120> when<00:30:15.360> i<00:30:15.440> was

came out as trans when i was

came out as trans when i was
19<00:30:16.960> or<00:30:17.120> 20

19 or 20

19 or 20
and<00:30:18.399> used<00:30:18.640> female<00:30:18.960> pronouns<00:30:19.520> and

and used female pronouns and

and used female pronouns and
wore<00:30:20.480> women's<00:30:20.799> clothing<00:30:21.200> and<00:30:21.279> presented

wore women's clothing and presented

wore women's clothing and presented
female<00:30:22.080> or<00:30:22.240> genderqueer<00:30:22.880> for<00:30:23.520> a<00:30:23.679> while<00:30:24.240> and

female or genderqueer for a while and

female or genderqueer for a while and
then

then

then
um<00:30:25.840> through<00:30:26.240> a<00:30:26.320> sort<00:30:26.559> of

um through a sort of

um through a sort of
string<00:30:28.000> of<00:30:28.640> personal<00:30:29.039> events<00:30:29.360> spiritual

string of personal events spiritual

string of personal events spiritual
events<00:30:30.080> sexual<00:30:30.399> events<00:30:31.200> i

events sexual events i

events sexual events i
decided<00:30:32.559> to

decided to

decided to
put<00:30:34.159> any<00:30:34.399> sort<00:30:34.559> of<00:30:35.039> transformation<00:30:35.600> in<00:30:35.679> my

put any sort of transformation in my

put any sort of transformation in my
body<00:30:36.080> on<00:30:36.240> hold<00:30:36.480> and<00:30:36.640> really<00:30:36.880> cultivate<00:30:37.360> a

body on hold and really cultivate a

body on hold and really cultivate a
feminine<00:30:37.919> and<00:30:38.000> feminist<00:30:38.399> sense<00:30:38.640> of<00:30:38.720> self<00:30:39.039> and

feminine and feminist sense of self and

feminine and feminist sense of self and
spirituality<00:30:40.000> and<00:30:40.159> then<00:30:40.399> began<00:30:40.880> bringing

spirituality and then began bringing

spirituality and then began bringing
that<00:30:41.360> forward<00:30:41.760> nearly<00:30:42.159> a<00:30:42.399> decade<00:30:42.880> later<00:30:43.440> i

that forward nearly a decade later i

that forward nearly a decade later i
think<00:30:43.840> in<00:30:44.000> around<00:30:44.320> the<00:30:44.399> summer<00:30:44.720> of<00:30:44.799> 2010<00:30:45.840> i

think in around the summer of 2010 i

think in around the summer of 2010 i
had<00:30:47.440> what<00:30:47.600> i<00:30:47.679> call<00:30:47.840> the<00:30:47.919> summer<00:30:48.159> of<00:30:48.240> the

had what i call the summer of the

had what i call the summer of the
sundress<00:30:49.039> and<00:30:49.279> then

sundress and then

sundress and then
um

um

um
was<00:30:51.440> still<00:30:51.679> going<00:30:51.840> through<00:30:52.080> a<00:30:52.159> lot<00:30:52.320> of

was still going through a lot of

was still going through a lot of
internal<00:30:54.159> conflict<00:30:55.039> it<00:30:55.120> wasn't<00:30:55.520> until<00:30:55.840> the

internal conflict it wasn't until the

internal conflict it wasn't until the
summer<00:30:56.320> of<00:30:56.480> 2012<00:30:57.279> that<00:30:57.360> i<00:30:57.519> decided<00:30:57.919> that<00:30:58.080> i<00:30:58.159> was

summer of 2012 that i decided that i was

summer of 2012 that i decided that i was
going<00:30:58.399> to<00:30:58.559> transition<00:30:59.200> and<00:30:59.679> i<00:30:59.840> decided<00:31:00.240> that<00:31:00.320> i

going to transition and i decided that i

going to transition and i decided that i
was<00:31:00.559> going<00:31:00.559> to<00:31:00.640> do<00:31:00.799> so<00:31:01.039> really<00:31:01.279> openly<00:31:01.679> and

was going to do so really openly and

was going to do so really openly and
publicly<00:31:02.640> within<00:31:03.039> the<00:31:03.120> community<00:31:03.600> that<00:31:03.679> i'm<00:31:03.840> a

publicly within the community that i'm a

publicly within the community that i'm a
part<00:31:04.159> of

part of

part of
because<00:31:05.360> i<00:31:05.519> felt<00:31:05.760> like<00:31:05.919> i<00:31:06.000> was<00:31:06.080> sort<00:31:06.240> of<00:31:06.399> the

because i felt like i was sort of the

because i felt like i was sort of the
first<00:31:06.880> one<00:31:07.120> to<00:31:07.279> be<00:31:07.919> visible<00:31:08.320> and<00:31:08.399> vocal<00:31:08.880> in

first one to be visible and vocal in

first one to be visible and vocal in
that<00:31:09.120> way

that way

that way
and<00:31:10.320> i<00:31:10.480> decided<00:31:10.880> that<00:31:11.120> i<00:31:11.279> would<00:31:11.919> crowdsource

and i decided that i would crowdsource

and i decided that i would crowdsource
my<00:31:12.960> gender<00:31:13.279> confirmation

my gender confirmation

my gender confirmation
which<00:31:14.880> became<00:31:15.120> a<00:31:15.279> really<00:31:15.519> big<00:31:15.679> project<00:31:16.159> that<00:31:16.240> i

which became a really big project that i

which became a really big project that i
called<00:31:16.559> kickstart<00:31:17.039> her<00:31:18.159> and<00:31:18.320> i<00:31:18.399> raised<00:31:18.880> over

called kickstart her and i raised over

called kickstart her and i raised over
twenty<00:31:19.360> thousand<00:31:19.600> dollars<00:31:20.000> to<00:31:20.080> pay<00:31:20.240> for<00:31:20.399> my

twenty thousand dollars to pay for my

twenty thousand dollars to pay for my
gender<00:31:20.880> confirmation<00:31:21.360> surgery

gender confirmation surgery

gender confirmation surgery
it<00:31:22.720> was<00:31:22.880> really<00:31:23.120> important<00:31:23.440> for<00:31:23.519> me<00:31:23.679> to

it was really important for me to

it was really important for me to
transition<00:31:24.799> publicly<00:31:25.440> and<00:31:25.679> to

transition publicly and to

transition publicly and to
put<00:31:26.960> my<00:31:27.120> process<00:31:27.600> out<00:31:27.760> into<00:31:28.000> the<00:31:28.159> world

put my process out into the world

put my process out into the world
because<00:31:29.840> i<00:31:30.000> really<00:31:30.240> believe<00:31:30.480> in<00:31:30.720> demystifying

because i really believe in demystifying

because i really believe in demystifying
the<00:31:31.519> process

the process

the process
i<00:31:32.799> i<00:31:32.960> know<00:31:33.120> for<00:31:33.360> myself<00:31:33.840> when<00:31:34.080> i<00:31:34.320> was

i i know for myself when i was

i i know for myself when i was
contemplating<00:31:35.440> the<00:31:35.600> transition<00:31:36.080> and<00:31:36.240> i<00:31:36.320> was

contemplating the transition and i was

contemplating the transition and i was
looking<00:31:36.799> for<00:31:37.519> resources<00:31:38.399> or<00:31:38.720> other<00:31:38.960> stories

looking for resources or other stories

looking for resources or other stories
that<00:31:40.080> uh<00:31:40.320> i<00:31:40.559> i<00:31:41.120> couldn't<00:31:41.360> i<00:31:41.519> never<00:31:41.760> found

that uh i i couldn't i never found

that uh i i couldn't i never found
something<00:31:42.399> that<00:31:42.559> was<00:31:42.799> like<00:31:42.960> as<00:31:43.200> empowering

something that was like as empowering

something that was like as empowering
and<00:31:44.159> inspiring<00:31:44.559> as<00:31:44.799> that<00:31:44.960> i<00:31:45.120> needed<00:31:45.440> at<00:31:45.519> the

and inspiring as that i needed at the

and inspiring as that i needed at the
moment

moment

moment
so<00:31:46.720> i<00:31:46.799> thought<00:31:47.039> on<00:31:47.120> one<00:31:47.279> hand<00:31:47.519> that<00:31:47.679> if<00:31:47.760> i<00:31:47.919> could

so i thought on one hand that if i could

so i thought on one hand that if i could
like<00:31:48.320> sort<00:31:48.480> of<00:31:48.640> take<00:31:48.960> the<00:31:49.039> motivation<00:31:49.519> that<00:31:49.600> i

like sort of take the motivation that i

like sort of take the motivation that i
had<00:31:50.080> and<00:31:50.159> make<00:31:50.320> that<00:31:50.559> something<00:31:50.799> available<00:31:51.200> to

had and make that something available to

had and make that something available to
other<00:31:51.440> people<00:31:52.320> that<00:31:52.480> would<00:31:52.640> be<00:31:52.799> great<00:31:53.519> but

other people that would be great but

other people that would be great but
mostly<00:31:54.159> it<00:31:54.320> was<00:31:54.480> for<00:31:54.640> the<00:31:54.799> folks<00:31:55.200> in<00:31:55.279> my<00:31:55.440> life

mostly it was for the folks in my life

mostly it was for the folks in my life
and<00:31:55.760> in<00:31:55.840> my<00:31:56.000> community<00:31:56.399> who<00:31:56.720> have<00:31:57.120> no<00:31:57.440> real

and in my community who have no real

and in my community who have no real
understanding<00:31:58.240> or<00:31:58.320> previous<00:31:58.640> experience

understanding or previous experience

understanding or previous experience
with<00:31:59.519> trans<00:31:59.840> folk

with trans folk

with trans folk
and

and

and
there's<00:32:02.080> so<00:32:02.240> many<00:32:02.480> questions<00:32:03.120> around<00:32:03.440> like

there's so many questions around like

there's so many questions around like
the<00:32:03.760> hows<00:32:04.080> and<00:32:04.159> whys<00:32:04.559> and<00:32:04.640> some<00:32:04.799> of<00:32:04.960> the<00:32:05.440> more

the hows and whys and some of the more

the hows and whys and some of the more
public<00:32:06.159> figures

public figures

public figures
like

like

like
don't<00:32:09.760> enjoy<00:32:10.080> speaking<00:32:10.799> to<00:32:11.279> some<00:32:11.440> of<00:32:11.519> those

don't enjoy speaking to some of those

don't enjoy speaking to some of those
questions<00:32:12.559> and<00:32:12.720> i<00:32:12.799> just<00:32:12.960> felt<00:32:13.120> like<00:32:13.279> i'm<00:32:13.440> an

questions and i just felt like i'm an

questions and i just felt like i'm an
open<00:32:13.679> book<00:32:13.919> as<00:32:14.000> a<00:32:14.080> performance<00:32:14.559> artist<00:32:14.799> i've

open book as a performance artist i've

open book as a performance artist i've
always<00:32:15.279> been<00:32:15.440> really<00:32:15.679> open<00:32:15.919> with<00:32:16.000> my<00:32:16.159> process

always been really open with my process

always been really open with my process
and<00:32:17.760> so

and so

and so
sharing<00:32:19.360> that

sharing that

sharing that
just<00:32:20.559> became<00:32:20.880> a<00:32:21.039> way

just became a way

just became a way
for<00:32:22.080> people<00:32:22.320> to<00:32:22.480> know<00:32:22.880> like<00:32:23.279> the<00:32:23.519> ins<00:32:23.760> and<00:32:23.840> outs

for people to know like the ins and outs

for people to know like the ins and outs
of<00:32:24.640> not<00:32:24.799> only<00:32:25.039> the<00:32:25.120> procedure<00:32:25.519> which<00:32:25.679> people

of not only the procedure which people

of not only the procedure which people
had<00:32:26.000> a<00:32:26.000> lot<00:32:26.159> of<00:32:26.240> questions<00:32:26.559> about<00:32:26.799> the<00:32:26.880> surgery

had a lot of questions about the surgery

had a lot of questions about the surgery
itself<00:32:27.600> but<00:32:28.000> how<00:32:28.159> my<00:32:28.320> body<00:32:28.640> was<00:32:28.799> changing<00:32:29.120> what

itself but how my body was changing what

itself but how my body was changing what
sort<00:32:29.519> of<00:32:29.600> ways<00:32:29.840> this<00:32:30.000> impacted<00:32:30.399> my<00:32:30.559> life

sort of ways this impacted my life

sort of ways this impacted my life
outside<00:32:32.399> of<00:32:32.960> simply<00:32:33.200> gender<00:32:33.519> identity<00:32:33.919> but<00:32:34.159> in

outside of simply gender identity but in

outside of simply gender identity but in
relationships

relationships

relationships
professionally

professionally

professionally
societal<00:32:38.000> things<00:32:38.240> on<00:32:38.399> the<00:32:38.480> street<00:32:38.880> like

societal things on the street like

societal things on the street like
whatever<00:32:39.840> human<00:32:40.159> interactions<00:32:40.720> you<00:32:40.799> could

whatever human interactions you could

whatever human interactions you could
have<00:32:41.600> i<00:32:41.760> was<00:32:41.919> very<00:32:42.080> fortunate<00:32:42.480> that<00:32:42.640> my<00:32:42.960> story

have i was very fortunate that my story

have i was very fortunate that my story
was<00:32:43.440> picked<00:32:43.679> up<00:32:43.760> by<00:32:43.919> a<00:32:44.000> few<00:32:44.240> new<00:32:44.480> sources

was picked up by a few new sources

was picked up by a few new sources
and<00:32:46.000> then<00:32:46.159> i<00:32:46.240> had<00:32:46.399> like<00:32:46.559> an<00:32:46.720> even<00:32:46.880> broader

and then i had like an even broader

and then i had like an even broader
platform

platform

platform
which<00:32:48.640> was<00:32:48.799> really<00:32:49.039> exciting<00:32:49.440> because<00:32:50.000> it

which was really exciting because it

which was really exciting because it
suddenly<00:32:50.640> became<00:32:50.880> an<00:32:51.120> opportunity<00:32:51.679> for<00:32:52.000> a

suddenly became an opportunity for a

suddenly became an opportunity for a
much<00:32:52.480> broader<00:32:53.039> outreach<00:32:53.440> in<00:32:53.519> terms<00:32:53.760> of

much broader outreach in terms of

much broader outreach in terms of
education

education

education
and<00:32:55.919> and<00:32:56.080> that<00:32:56.240> was<00:32:56.399> really<00:32:56.559> exciting<00:32:56.960> because

and and that was really exciting because

and and that was really exciting because
uh<00:32:58.159> throughout<00:32:58.799> my

uh throughout my

uh throughout my
blogging<00:33:00.080> and<00:33:00.159> facebooking<00:33:00.799> whatever<00:33:01.039> i've

blogging and facebooking whatever i've

blogging and facebooking whatever i've
gotten

gotten

gotten
comments<00:33:02.640> from

comments from

comments from
trans<00:33:04.080> people<00:33:04.399> and<00:33:04.559> allies<00:33:05.200> across<00:33:05.600> the

trans people and allies across the

trans people and allies across the
country<00:33:06.080> and<00:33:06.240> some<00:33:06.399> even<00:33:06.640> internationally

country and some even internationally

country and some even internationally
who<00:33:07.440> have<00:33:08.000> thanked<00:33:08.320> me<00:33:08.559> for<00:33:08.880> being<00:33:09.039> so<00:33:09.279> public

who have thanked me for being so public

who have thanked me for being so public
and<00:33:10.080> for<00:33:10.480> explaining<00:33:10.960> something<00:33:11.200> to<00:33:11.279> them

and for explaining something to them

and for explaining something to them
that<00:33:11.519> they<00:33:11.600> didn't<00:33:11.840> understand<00:33:12.399> or<00:33:12.559> for

that they didn't understand or for

that they didn't understand or for
giving<00:33:12.960> them<00:33:13.200> hope<00:33:13.600> um

giving them hope um

giving them hope um
you<00:33:14.640> know<00:33:15.039> in<00:33:15.120> terms<00:33:15.440> of

you know in terms of

you know in terms of
where<00:33:16.320> they<00:33:16.480> were<00:33:16.640> at<00:33:16.880> in<00:33:16.960> their<00:33:17.120> process<00:33:17.440> and

where they were at in their process and

where they were at in their process and
being<00:33:17.679> scared<00:33:18.000> to<00:33:18.080> move<00:33:18.240> forward<00:33:18.880> so<00:33:19.120> it's

being scared to move forward so it's

being scared to move forward so it's
been<00:33:19.440> really<00:33:19.600> awesome<00:33:20.399> for<00:33:20.559> opening<00:33:20.880> the

been really awesome for opening the

been really awesome for opening the
conversation

conversation

conversation
my<00:33:23.519> identity<00:33:24.000> my<00:33:24.159> entire<00:33:24.480> life<00:33:24.799> i<00:33:24.880> guess

my identity my entire life i guess

my identity my entire life i guess
publicly<00:33:25.600> has<00:33:25.840> shifted<00:33:26.159> a<00:33:26.240> lot<00:33:26.559> but<00:33:26.880> to<00:33:27.039> me

publicly has shifted a lot but to me

publicly has shifted a lot but to me
i've<00:33:27.360> always<00:33:27.600> been<00:33:27.760> a<00:33:27.840> woman<00:33:28.080> and<00:33:28.240> a<00:33:28.320> lesbian

i've always been a woman and a lesbian

i've always been a woman and a lesbian
it's<00:33:28.880> never<00:33:29.120> been<00:33:29.279> ambiguous<00:33:29.760> in<00:33:29.919> my<00:33:30.000> head<00:33:30.559> i

it's never been ambiguous in my head i

it's never been ambiguous in my head i
think<00:33:30.799> i<00:33:30.960> have<00:33:31.120> had<00:33:31.279> a<00:33:31.360> hard<00:33:31.519> time<00:33:31.760> being

think i have had a hard time being

think i have had a hard time being
indian<00:33:32.240> within<00:33:32.480> the<00:33:32.559> lesbian<00:33:32.960> community<00:33:33.679> to

indian within the lesbian community to

indian within the lesbian community to
some<00:33:34.080> extent<00:33:34.640> um<00:33:35.200> i've<00:33:35.360> written<00:33:35.600> about<00:33:35.760> this

some extent um i've written about this

some extent um i've written about this
quite<00:33:36.159> a<00:33:36.240> bit<00:33:36.480> actually<00:33:36.960> so<00:33:37.519> when<00:33:37.679> i<00:33:37.760> first

quite a bit actually so when i first

quite a bit actually so when i first
came<00:33:38.159> to<00:33:38.320> new<00:33:38.480> york<00:33:38.640> in<00:33:38.799> 2008<00:33:39.600> i<00:33:39.919> wasn't<00:33:40.320> out<00:33:40.399> to

came to new york in 2008 i wasn't out to

came to new york in 2008 i wasn't out to
my<00:33:40.720> parents<00:33:41.039> i<00:33:41.120> wasn't<00:33:41.360> out<00:33:41.519> to<00:33:41.679> much<00:33:41.840> of<00:33:42.000> my

my parents i wasn't out to much of my

my parents i wasn't out to much of my
family<00:33:42.399> at<00:33:42.559> all<00:33:43.039> it<00:33:43.120> definitely<00:33:43.440> wasn't<00:33:43.760> out

family at all it definitely wasn't out

family at all it definitely wasn't out
publicly<00:33:44.720> publicly<00:33:45.279> is<00:33:45.360> one<00:33:45.600> thing<00:33:45.760> but<00:33:46.000> not

publicly publicly is one thing but not

publicly publicly is one thing but not
being<00:33:46.399> out<00:33:46.480> to<00:33:46.640> family<00:33:47.039> became<00:33:47.360> a<00:33:47.600> big<00:33:47.760> issue

being out to family became a big issue

being out to family became a big issue
for<00:33:48.159> a<00:33:48.240> lot<00:33:48.399> of<00:33:48.480> the<00:33:48.640> people<00:33:48.880> that<00:33:48.960> i<00:33:49.120> dated

for a lot of the people that i dated

for a lot of the people that i dated
because<00:33:49.679> a<00:33:49.760> lot<00:33:49.919> of<00:33:50.000> people<00:33:50.320> honestly<00:33:50.799> just

because a lot of people honestly just

because a lot of people honestly just
didn't<00:33:51.279> understand<00:33:52.080> the<00:33:52.240> cultural

didn't understand the cultural

didn't understand the cultural
implications<00:33:53.279> of<00:33:53.360> me<00:33:53.600> coming<00:33:53.919> out<00:33:54.000> they

implications of me coming out they

implications of me coming out they
didn't<00:33:54.399> understand<00:33:54.720> what<00:33:54.960> it<00:33:55.039> means<00:33:55.360> to

didn't understand what it means to

didn't understand what it means to
not<00:33:56.320> have<00:33:56.480> the<00:33:56.640> support<00:33:56.960> of<00:33:57.120> a<00:33:57.200> greater

not have the support of a greater

not have the support of a greater
community<00:33:58.000> outside<00:33:58.240> of<00:33:58.480> your<00:33:58.640> family<00:33:59.039> and

community outside of your family and

community outside of your family and
they<00:33:59.279> don't<00:33:59.519> understand<00:33:59.919> what<00:34:00.080> it<00:34:00.320> means<00:34:00.559> to

they don't understand what it means to

they don't understand what it means to
genuinely<00:34:01.279> be<00:34:01.519> fearful<00:34:01.919> that<00:34:02.080> you<00:34:02.240> you'll<00:34:02.480> be

genuinely be fearful that you you'll be

genuinely be fearful that you you'll be
disowned<00:34:03.120> because<00:34:03.440> of<00:34:03.519> that

disowned because of that

disowned because of that
so<00:34:04.640> that<00:34:04.799> was<00:34:04.960> kind<00:34:05.120> of<00:34:05.279> an<00:34:05.600> impasse<00:34:06.080> that<00:34:06.159> i

so that was kind of an impasse that i

so that was kind of an impasse that i
had<00:34:06.399> to<00:34:06.480> deal<00:34:06.640> with<00:34:06.799> quite<00:34:06.960> a<00:34:07.039> bit<00:34:07.200> when<00:34:07.440> i

had to deal with quite a bit when i

had to deal with quite a bit when i
first<00:34:07.840> came<00:34:08.000> to<00:34:08.159> the<00:34:08.320> city<00:34:08.879> it's<00:34:09.040> definitely

first came to the city it's definitely

first came to the city it's definitely
gotten<00:34:09.520> better<00:34:09.760> over<00:34:10.000> time<00:34:10.320> i<00:34:10.399> won't<00:34:10.639> say<00:34:10.800> that

gotten better over time i won't say that

gotten better over time i won't say that
i<00:34:11.599> won't<00:34:11.760> say<00:34:12.000> otherwise<00:34:12.399> though<00:34:12.560> i<00:34:12.639> do<00:34:12.800> think

i won't say otherwise though i do think

i won't say otherwise though i do think
there's<00:34:13.280> a<00:34:13.359> long<00:34:13.520> way<00:34:13.679> to<00:34:13.839> go<00:34:14.000> even<00:34:14.320> in<00:34:14.399> new

there's a long way to go even in new

there's a long way to go even in new
york<00:34:15.200> i<00:34:15.359> think<00:34:15.520> i<00:34:15.679> was<00:34:15.839> able<00:34:16.079> to<00:34:16.159> be<00:34:16.320> more<00:34:16.480> of

york i think i was able to be more of

york i think i was able to be more of
myself<00:34:17.040> when<00:34:17.200> i<00:34:17.359> moved<00:34:17.520> to<00:34:17.679> new<00:34:17.839> york<00:34:18.000> city<00:34:18.240> and

myself when i moved to new york city and

myself when i moved to new york city and
my<00:34:18.879> individual<00:34:19.359> identities<00:34:20.000> and<00:34:20.320> part<00:34:20.480> of<00:34:20.560> the

my individual identities and part of the

my individual identities and part of the
greatness<00:34:21.359> about<00:34:21.599> new<00:34:21.760> york<00:34:21.919> city<00:34:22.079> is<00:34:22.240> that

greatness about new york city is that

greatness about new york city is that
i've<00:34:22.399> been<00:34:22.560> able<00:34:22.720> to<00:34:22.800> explore<00:34:23.200> the

i've been able to explore the

i've been able to explore the
intersection<00:34:23.760> of<00:34:23.839> those<00:34:24.320> identities<00:34:25.359> growing

intersection of those identities growing

intersection of those identities growing
up<00:34:25.919> i<00:34:26.079> honestly<00:34:26.480> felt<00:34:26.720> that<00:34:26.879> being<00:34:27.119> south

up i honestly felt that being south

up i honestly felt that being south
asian<00:34:27.679> being<00:34:27.919> indian<00:34:28.320> and<00:34:28.399> being<00:34:28.639> gay<00:34:28.800> were

asian being indian and being gay were

asian being indian and being gay were
two<00:34:29.520> exclusive<00:34:30.000> ideas<00:34:30.240> they<00:34:30.399> were<00:34:30.480> mutually

two exclusive ideas they were mutually

two exclusive ideas they were mutually
exclusive<00:34:31.280> to<00:34:31.440> each<00:34:31.599> other<00:34:32.240> but<00:34:32.720> since<00:34:32.960> coming

exclusive to each other but since coming

exclusive to each other but since coming
to<00:34:33.359> new<00:34:33.520> york<00:34:33.760> i've<00:34:33.919> realized<00:34:34.159> that<00:34:34.320> there<00:34:34.480> is

to new york i've realized that there is

to new york i've realized that there is
a<00:34:34.879> south<00:34:35.200> asian<00:34:35.520> community<00:34:36.079> it's<00:34:36.240> called

a south asian community it's called

a south asian community it's called
that's<00:34:37.040> lgbtq<00:34:38.000> it's<00:34:38.079> called<00:34:38.320> desi<00:34:38.800> q

that's lgbtq it's called desi q

that's lgbtq it's called desi q
and<00:34:40.320> even<00:34:40.480> that<00:34:40.720> word<00:34:41.119> that<00:34:41.280> identity<00:34:41.839> itself

and even that word that identity itself

and even that word that identity itself
has<00:34:42.240> kind<00:34:42.399> of<00:34:42.560> opened<00:34:42.879> up<00:34:43.040> a<00:34:43.200> pandora's<00:34:43.760> box

has kind of opened up a pandora's box

has kind of opened up a pandora's box
it's<00:34:44.240> the<00:34:44.320> past<00:34:44.720> of<00:34:44.800> the<00:34:44.960> possibilities<00:34:45.760> we

it's the past of the possibilities we

it's the past of the possibilities we
talk<00:34:46.159> about<00:34:46.879> our<00:34:47.040> culture<00:34:47.440> we<00:34:47.599> talk<00:34:47.760> about<00:34:48.000> our

talk about our culture we talk about our

talk about our culture we talk about our
religion<00:34:48.480> we<00:34:48.639> talk<00:34:48.879> about<00:34:49.119> how<00:34:49.359> it<00:34:49.440> means<00:34:49.679> to

religion we talk about how it means to

religion we talk about how it means to
be

be

be
american<00:34:51.599> in<00:34:51.760> this<00:34:51.919> country<00:34:52.560> being<00:34:52.800> south

american in this country being south

american in this country being south
asian<00:34:53.520> and<00:34:53.679> being<00:34:53.919> gay<00:34:54.399> so<00:34:54.560> the<00:34:54.720> fact<00:34:54.960> that<00:34:55.200> new

asian and being gay so the fact that new

asian and being gay so the fact that new
york<00:34:55.599> city<00:34:55.919> just<00:34:56.240> by<00:34:56.480> volume<00:34:57.040> has<00:34:57.200> so<00:34:57.440> many

york city just by volume has so many

york city just by volume has so many
people<00:34:58.240> i've<00:34:58.400> been<00:34:58.560> able<00:34:58.800> to<00:34:58.880> find<00:34:59.119> the

people i've been able to find the

people i've been able to find the
intersection<00:34:59.680> of<00:34:59.760> those<00:35:00.000> two<00:35:00.160> identities

intersection of those two identities

intersection of those two identities
it's<00:35:00.800> been<00:35:00.960> great<00:35:01.440> i<00:35:01.520> do<00:35:01.680> think<00:35:01.839> my<00:35:01.920> identity

it's been great i do think my identity

it's been great i do think my identity
changed<00:35:02.880> after<00:35:03.119> it<00:35:03.200> came<00:35:03.440> out<00:35:03.680> and<00:35:03.839> after<00:35:04.079> i

changed after it came out and after i

changed after it came out and after i
was<00:35:04.560> able<00:35:04.800> to<00:35:04.960> realize<00:35:05.359> this<00:35:05.599> part<00:35:05.760> of<00:35:05.839> my

was able to realize this part of my

was able to realize this part of my
identity<00:35:06.480> especially<00:35:06.880> in<00:35:06.960> the<00:35:07.119> public<00:35:07.520> forum

identity especially in the public forum

identity especially in the public forum
i

i

i
not<00:35:09.920> to<00:35:10.000> be<00:35:10.160> arrogant<00:35:10.480> but<00:35:10.640> i<00:35:10.720> do<00:35:10.880> think<00:35:11.040> i'm

not to be arrogant but i do think i'm

not to be arrogant but i do think i'm
articulate<00:35:11.839> i<00:35:11.920> think<00:35:12.079> i'm<00:35:12.320> very<00:35:12.480> well<00:35:12.720> written

articulate i think i'm very well written

articulate i think i'm very well written
obviously<00:35:13.440> i<00:35:13.520> have<00:35:13.599> a<00:35:13.680> book<00:35:13.920> published<00:35:14.720> i've

obviously i have a book published i've

obviously i have a book published i've
written<00:35:15.200> a<00:35:15.280> lot<00:35:15.440> for<00:35:15.599> the<00:35:15.680> un<00:35:16.160> and<00:35:16.320> i've

written a lot for the un and i've

written a lot for the un and i've
written<00:35:16.640> a<00:35:16.720> lot<00:35:16.880> for<00:35:17.040> other<00:35:17.200> prestigious

written a lot for other prestigious

written a lot for other prestigious
organizations<00:35:18.400> but<00:35:18.560> i've<00:35:18.800> never<00:35:19.040> been<00:35:19.280> able

organizations but i've never been able

organizations but i've never been able
to<00:35:19.680> address<00:35:20.480> this<00:35:20.800> really<00:35:21.040> big<00:35:21.200> part<00:35:21.440> of<00:35:21.599> my

to address this really big part of my

to address this really big part of my
identity<00:35:22.160> this<00:35:22.400> lgbtq<00:35:23.119> part<00:35:23.359> i<00:35:23.440> didn't<00:35:23.599> come

identity this lgbtq part i didn't come

identity this lgbtq part i didn't come
out<00:35:23.920> to<00:35:24.079> my<00:35:24.240> parents<00:35:24.560> until<00:35:24.800> i<00:35:24.880> was<00:35:25.040> 27

out to my parents until i was 27

out to my parents until i was 27
i<00:35:26.320> didn't<00:35:26.480> come<00:35:26.640> out<00:35:26.800> publicly<00:35:27.200> until<00:35:27.440> i<00:35:27.520> was

i didn't come out publicly until i was

i didn't come out publicly until i was
29<00:35:28.480> and<00:35:28.800> even<00:35:29.119> in<00:35:29.440> mainstream<00:35:30.000> media<00:35:30.560> lgbtq

29 and even in mainstream media lgbtq

29 and even in mainstream media lgbtq
issues<00:35:31.599> are<00:35:31.760> definitely<00:35:32.160> covered<00:35:32.480> a<00:35:32.560> lot<00:35:32.800> but

issues are definitely covered a lot but

issues are definitely covered a lot but
a<00:35:33.040> lot<00:35:33.200> of<00:35:33.280> the<00:35:33.440> times<00:35:33.760> it<00:35:33.920> is<00:35:34.079> in<00:35:34.240> very<00:35:35.040> you

a lot of the times it is in very you

a lot of the times it is in very you
know<00:35:35.440> small<00:35:36.000> vessels<00:35:36.400> and<00:35:36.560> small<00:35:36.800> myopic<00:35:37.359> ways

know small vessels and small myopic ways

know small vessels and small myopic ways
like<00:35:37.839> of<00:35:37.920> course<00:35:38.240> marriage<00:35:38.560> is<00:35:38.640> important<00:35:39.040> but

like of course marriage is important but

like of course marriage is important but
there's<00:35:39.440> also<00:35:40.079> safety<00:35:40.400> concerns<00:35:40.800> that<00:35:40.960> are

there's also safety concerns that are

there's also safety concerns that are
not<00:35:41.200> addressed<00:35:41.520> a<00:35:41.599> whole<00:35:41.760> lot<00:35:41.920> there's<00:35:42.160> also

not addressed a whole lot there's also

not addressed a whole lot there's also
other<00:35:42.640> forms<00:35:42.960> of<00:35:43.040> discrimination<00:35:43.920> in<00:35:44.000> the

other forms of discrimination in the

other forms of discrimination in the
intersectionality<00:35:44.880> of<00:35:45.040> it<00:35:45.119> that's<00:35:45.280> not

intersectionality of it that's not

intersectionality of it that's not
discussed<00:35:46.079> a<00:35:46.160> lot<00:35:46.560> those<00:35:46.800> of<00:35:46.960> us<00:35:47.040> who<00:35:47.200> have

discussed a lot those of us who have

discussed a lot those of us who have
international<00:35:47.839> careers<00:35:48.320> we<00:35:48.480> have<00:35:48.560> to<00:35:48.640> balance

international careers we have to balance

international careers we have to balance
a<00:35:49.119> lot<00:35:49.280> of<00:35:49.440> our<00:35:49.520> online<00:35:49.920> identity<00:35:50.400> with<00:35:50.560> our

a lot of our online identity with our

a lot of our online identity with our
personal<00:35:51.119> identity<00:35:52.160> you<00:35:52.320> know<00:35:52.480> so<00:35:52.720> there's<00:35:52.880> a

personal identity you know so there's a

personal identity you know so there's a
lot<00:35:53.119> of<00:35:53.280> issues<00:35:53.520> that<00:35:53.680> are<00:35:53.760> not<00:35:54.000> really<00:35:54.240> dealt

lot of issues that are not really dealt

lot of issues that are not really dealt
with<00:35:54.800> in<00:35:54.880> the<00:35:55.040> media<00:35:55.440> and<00:35:55.599> i<00:35:55.920> do<00:35:56.079> think<00:35:56.240> it's

with in the media and i do think it's

with in the media and i do think it's
getting<00:35:56.720> better<00:35:57.280> but<00:35:57.520> i'm<00:35:57.760> really<00:35:58.000> happy<00:35:58.320> that

getting better but i'm really happy that

getting better but i'm really happy that
i<00:35:58.560> can<00:35:58.880> decision<00:35:59.359> myself<00:35:59.760> to<00:35:59.839> actually<00:36:00.160> be<00:36:00.400> a

i can decision myself to actually be a

i can decision myself to actually be a
main<00:36:00.720> part<00:36:00.960> of<00:36:01.119> that<00:36:01.760> a<00:36:01.839> lot<00:36:02.000> of

main part of that a lot of

main part of that a lot of
self-exploration<00:36:03.280> and<00:36:03.440> identity<00:36:03.839> does

self-exploration and identity does

self-exploration and identity does
happen<00:36:04.800> in<00:36:04.960> high<00:36:05.200> school<00:36:06.000> but<00:36:06.240> i<00:36:06.320> feel<00:36:06.480> like<00:36:06.560> a

happen in high school but i feel like a

happen in high school but i feel like a
lot<00:36:06.720> of<00:36:06.800> people<00:36:07.040> have<00:36:07.280> an<00:36:07.440> idea<00:36:07.920> or<00:36:08.079> a<00:36:08.240> sense<00:36:08.480> of

lot of people have an idea or a sense of

lot of people have an idea or a sense of
who<00:36:08.720> they<00:36:08.880> are<00:36:09.040> even<00:36:09.359> younger<00:36:09.599> than<00:36:09.839> that<00:36:10.079> like

who they are even younger than that like

who they are even younger than that like
i<00:36:10.400> think<00:36:10.640> that<00:36:11.200> you<00:36:11.280> know<00:36:11.760> kids<00:36:12.480> five<00:36:12.880> six

i think that you know kids five six

i think that you know kids five six
years<00:36:13.280> old<00:36:13.440> even<00:36:13.680> younger<00:36:14.480> have<00:36:14.720> a<00:36:14.800> real<00:36:15.200> sense

years old even younger have a real sense

years old even younger have a real sense
of<00:36:15.680> self<00:36:16.400> um<00:36:17.040> and<00:36:17.200> sometimes<00:36:17.760> adults<00:36:18.079> in<00:36:18.160> their

of self um and sometimes adults in their

of self um and sometimes adults in their
lives<00:36:18.560> are<00:36:18.640> like<00:36:18.880> no<00:36:19.119> you<00:36:19.280> don't<00:36:19.440> know<00:36:19.520> what

lives are like no you don't know what

lives are like no you don't know what
you<00:36:19.760> don't<00:36:19.920> know<00:36:20.000> anything<00:36:20.400> you're<00:36:20.640> just<00:36:20.880> a

you don't know anything you're just a

you don't know anything you're just a
little<00:36:21.119> kid<00:36:21.680> and<00:36:21.839> so<00:36:22.000> then<00:36:22.320> that<00:36:22.560> kind<00:36:22.720> of<00:36:22.800> like

little kid and so then that kind of like

little kid and so then that kind of like
stalls<00:36:24.240> that<00:36:24.480> development<00:36:25.200> i<00:36:25.359> would<00:36:25.440> say<00:36:25.599> and

stalls that development i would say and

stalls that development i would say and
then<00:36:25.920> high<00:36:26.079> school<00:36:26.240> when<00:36:26.400> they<00:36:26.560> become<00:36:26.800> more

then high school when they become more

then high school when they become more
independent<00:36:27.520> away<00:36:27.760> from<00:36:27.920> like<00:36:28.079> some<00:36:28.160> of<00:36:28.240> these

independent away from like some of these

independent away from like some of these
adults<00:36:28.800> they're<00:36:28.960> like<00:36:29.119> you<00:36:29.280> know<00:36:29.359> what<00:36:29.520> this

adults they're like you know what this

adults they're like you know what this
is<00:36:29.839> who<00:36:30.000> i<00:36:30.160> am<00:36:30.560> i<00:36:30.880> don't<00:36:31.200> identify

is who i am i don't identify

is who i am i don't identify
i<00:36:32.880> feel<00:36:33.040> like<00:36:33.440> a<00:36:33.520> lot<00:36:33.680> of<00:36:33.760> times<00:36:34.240> uh<00:36:34.480> when

i feel like a lot of times uh when

i feel like a lot of times uh when
identity

identity

identity
people<00:36:36.160> talk<00:36:36.320> about<00:36:36.480> identity

people talk about identity

people talk about identity
you<00:36:38.000> have<00:36:38.079> to<00:36:38.160> put<00:36:38.320> labels<00:36:38.720> on<00:36:38.880> things<00:36:39.200> and<00:36:39.359> i

you have to put labels on things and i

you have to put labels on things and i
really<00:36:39.920> don't<00:36:40.160> like<00:36:40.320> labels<00:36:40.800> i<00:36:40.880> like<00:36:41.040> to<00:36:41.119> just

really don't like labels i like to just

really don't like labels i like to just
be<00:36:41.599> me

be me

be me
because<00:36:43.040> i<00:36:43.119> feel<00:36:43.280> like<00:36:43.359> labels<00:36:43.680> can<00:36:43.839> be

because i feel like labels can be

because i feel like labels can be
limiting<00:36:44.720> i<00:36:45.119> identify<00:36:45.920> as<00:36:46.240> a

limiting i identify as a

limiting i identify as a
gay<00:36:47.599> male<00:36:48.000> white

gay male white

gay male white
of<00:36:49.680> italian<00:36:50.400> american<00:36:51.200> background

of italian american background

of italian american background
and<00:36:53.599> they've<00:36:54.400> now<00:36:54.640> retired

and they've now retired

and they've now retired
uh<00:36:56.079> new<00:36:56.240> york<00:36:56.320> city<00:36:56.560> police<00:36:56.800> detective

uh new york city police detective

uh new york city police detective
and<00:36:58.320> recently<00:36:59.280> turned<00:36:59.599> 46<00:37:00.079> year<00:37:00.240> old

and recently turned 46 year old

and recently turned 46 year old
rogaine<00:37:02.400> rejected

rogaine rejected

rogaine rejected
american

american

american
well<00:37:06.079> i<00:37:06.560> came<00:37:06.800> in<00:37:06.880> the<00:37:06.960> police<00:37:07.119> department<00:37:07.680> in

well i came in the police department in

well i came in the police department in
1992

1992

1992
and<00:37:10.000> i<00:37:10.400> was<00:37:11.119> uh<00:37:11.599> outed

and i was uh outed

and i was uh outed
in<00:37:13.119> late<00:37:13.480> 1993

in late 1993

in late 1993
and<00:37:15.359> at<00:37:15.520> that<00:37:15.839> time<00:37:16.320> there<00:37:16.560> were<00:37:16.800> a<00:37:16.960> few<00:37:17.440> gay

and at that time there were a few gay

and at that time there were a few gay
cops<00:37:17.920> openly<00:37:18.320> gay<00:37:18.400> and<00:37:18.480> lesbian<00:37:18.880> cops<00:37:19.359> but<00:37:19.520> it

cops openly gay and lesbian cops but it

cops openly gay and lesbian cops but it
was<00:37:19.760> not<00:37:19.920> really<00:37:20.160> cool

was not really cool

was not really cool
to<00:37:21.359> be<00:37:21.760> gay<00:37:21.920> or<00:37:22.079> lesbian<00:37:22.720> and<00:37:22.800> be<00:37:22.960> a<00:37:23.040> police

to be gay or lesbian and be a police

to be gay or lesbian and be a police
officer<00:37:23.599> at<00:37:23.680> that<00:37:23.920> point<00:37:24.240> in<00:37:24.400> time<00:37:24.800> and<00:37:25.119> uh

officer at that point in time and uh

officer at that point in time and uh
when<00:37:25.680> i<00:37:25.760> was<00:37:26.000> outed<00:37:26.640> the<00:37:26.880> first<00:37:27.520> initial

when i was outed the first initial

when i was outed the first initial
reaction

reaction

reaction
uh<00:37:29.599> by<00:37:30.079> a<00:37:30.560> few<00:37:30.880> of<00:37:30.960> the<00:37:31.119> guys<00:37:31.359> that<00:37:31.520> i<00:37:31.599> worked

uh by a few of the guys that i worked

uh by a few of the guys that i worked
with<00:37:32.079> was<00:37:32.560> was<00:37:32.800> somewhat<00:37:33.119> negative

with was was somewhat negative

with was was somewhat negative
uh<00:37:34.640> you<00:37:34.800> know<00:37:35.119> they're<00:37:35.280> like<00:37:35.440> well<00:37:36.320> you<00:37:36.400> know

uh you know they're like well you know

uh you know they're like well you know
homeowners<00:37:37.040> shouldn't<00:37:37.280> be<00:37:37.440> on<00:37:37.599> this<00:37:37.839> job<00:37:38.320> and

homeowners shouldn't be on this job and

homeowners shouldn't be on this job and
i<00:37:39.440> don't<00:37:39.599> want<00:37:39.680> to<00:37:39.760> work<00:37:39.920> with<00:37:40.079> someone<00:37:40.400> like

i don't want to work with someone like

i don't want to work with someone like
that<00:37:41.040> and<00:37:41.680> you<00:37:41.760> know<00:37:41.839> what<00:37:42.000> if<00:37:42.160> we're<00:37:42.240> on<00:37:42.400> our

that and you know what if we're on our

that and you know what if we're on our
way<00:37:42.800> to<00:37:43.040> a<00:37:43.599> a<00:37:43.760> gun<00:37:44.000> run<00:37:44.400> you<00:37:44.480> know<00:37:44.720> somebody

way to a a gun run you know somebody

way to a a gun run you know somebody
with<00:37:45.119> a<00:37:45.200> gun<00:37:45.520> and<00:37:45.839> he<00:37:45.920> puts<00:37:46.079> his<00:37:46.160> hand<00:37:46.400> on<00:37:46.480> my

with a gun and he puts his hand on my

with a gun and he puts his hand on my
leg<00:37:46.800> what<00:37:46.960> am<00:37:47.040> i<00:37:47.119> supposed<00:37:47.280> to<00:37:47.359> do<00:37:47.520> about<00:37:47.680> that

leg what am i supposed to do about that

leg what am i supposed to do about that
because<00:37:48.480> that's<00:37:48.640> exactly<00:37:48.960> what<00:37:49.040> i<00:37:49.200> want<00:37:49.359> to<00:37:49.440> do

because that's exactly what i want to do

because that's exactly what i want to do
you<00:37:49.920> know<00:37:50.079> and<00:37:50.320> in<00:37:50.400> a<00:37:50.480> crisis<00:37:50.800> situation<00:37:51.280> and

you know and in a crisis situation and

you know and in a crisis situation and
start<00:37:51.520> grabbing<00:37:51.920> people's<00:37:52.240> legs

start grabbing people's legs

start grabbing people's legs
and<00:37:53.760> uh<00:37:54.480> you<00:37:54.640> know<00:37:54.800> so<00:37:55.040> there<00:37:55.359> were<00:37:55.520> just

and uh you know so there were just

and uh you know so there were just
statements<00:37:56.079> like<00:37:56.240> that<00:37:56.400> that<00:37:56.560> was<00:37:56.720> my<00:37:56.960> fear<00:37:57.280> my

statements like that that was my fear my

statements like that that was my fear my
fear<00:37:58.079> was<00:37:58.320> that

fear was that

fear was that
if<00:37:59.760> people<00:38:00.000> found<00:38:00.400> out<00:38:00.640> this<00:38:00.880> thing<00:38:01.040> which<00:38:01.200> had

if people found out this thing which had

if people found out this thing which had
nothing<00:38:01.680> to<00:38:01.760> do<00:38:01.920> with<00:38:02.160> work<00:38:02.560> it<00:38:02.720> had<00:38:02.880> to<00:38:02.960> do<00:38:03.119> my

nothing to do with work it had to do my

nothing to do with work it had to do my
personal<00:38:03.680> life<00:38:04.320> that<00:38:04.560> i<00:38:04.640> was<00:38:04.720> going<00:38:04.800> to<00:38:04.880> be

personal life that i was going to be

personal life that i was going to be
treated<00:38:05.520> less<00:38:05.839> than

treated less than

treated less than
i<00:38:07.040> was<00:38:07.200> going<00:38:07.359> to<00:38:07.440> be<00:38:07.599> treated<00:38:08.240> in<00:38:08.400> a<00:38:08.480> negative

i was going to be treated in a negative

i was going to be treated in a negative
way<00:38:09.119> and<00:38:09.200> potentially<00:38:09.920> my<00:38:10.079> safety<00:38:10.480> was<00:38:10.640> going

way and potentially my safety was going

way and potentially my safety was going
to<00:38:10.800> be<00:38:10.880> a<00:38:10.960> risk

to be a risk

to be a risk
because<00:38:12.560> that<00:38:12.880> had<00:38:13.200> happened<00:38:13.680> in<00:38:13.839> the<00:38:13.920> past

because that had happened in the past

because that had happened in the past
with<00:38:14.640> with<00:38:14.960> a<00:38:15.119> few<00:38:15.520> gay<00:38:15.680> and<00:38:15.760> lesbian<00:38:16.160> officers

with with a few gay and lesbian officers

with with a few gay and lesbian officers
where<00:38:17.280> you<00:38:17.359> know<00:38:17.520> they<00:38:17.680> were<00:38:17.760> calling<00:38:18.000> the

where you know they were calling the

where you know they were calling the
radio<00:38:18.480> for<00:38:18.640> help<00:38:19.280> and<00:38:19.440> help<00:38:19.680> would<00:38:19.839> be<00:38:20.000> delayed

radio for help and help would be delayed

radio for help and help would be delayed
and<00:38:20.640> arriving<00:38:21.280> you<00:38:21.359> know<00:38:21.920> or<00:38:22.079> maybe<00:38:22.320> not<00:38:22.480> come

and arriving you know or maybe not come

and arriving you know or maybe not come
at<00:38:22.800> all<00:38:23.040> on<00:38:23.200> the<00:38:23.280> flip<00:38:23.599> side

at all on the flip side

at all on the flip side
these<00:38:24.720> people<00:38:24.960> that<00:38:25.119> i<00:38:25.280> had<00:38:25.440> worked<00:38:25.680> with<00:38:25.920> had

these people that i had worked with had

these people that i had worked with had
known<00:38:26.320> me<00:38:26.480> for<00:38:26.640> quite<00:38:26.800> some<00:38:27.040> time

known me for quite some time

known me for quite some time
you<00:38:28.000> know<00:38:28.320> i<00:38:28.560> wasn't<00:38:28.880> there<00:38:29.119> a<00:38:29.200> long<00:38:29.440> time<00:38:29.599> but

you know i wasn't there a long time but

you know i wasn't there a long time but
i<00:38:29.839> was<00:38:30.000> there<00:38:30.160> long<00:38:30.400> enough<00:38:30.640> to<00:38:30.800> show<00:38:31.280> whether

i was there long enough to show whether

i was there long enough to show whether
or<00:38:31.599> not<00:38:31.839> i<00:38:32.000> was<00:38:32.240> competent<00:38:32.880> in<00:38:33.040> being<00:38:33.200> able<00:38:33.359> to

or not i was competent in being able to

or not i was competent in being able to
do<00:38:33.680> the<00:38:33.839> job

do the job

do the job
and<00:38:35.119> i<00:38:35.359> and<00:38:35.520> i<00:38:35.680> was

and i and i was

and i and i was
and<00:38:36.800> i<00:38:36.880> did<00:38:37.119> the<00:38:37.200> job<00:38:37.520> just<00:38:37.760> as<00:38:37.920> well<00:38:38.320> if<00:38:38.480> not

and i did the job just as well if not

and i did the job just as well if not
better<00:38:38.880> than<00:38:38.960> anybody<00:38:39.359> else<00:38:39.520> could<00:38:40.079> so<00:38:40.240> they

better than anybody else could so they

better than anybody else could so they
knew<00:38:40.640> i<00:38:40.720> was<00:38:40.960> competent<00:38:41.359> doing<00:38:41.599> my<00:38:41.760> job

knew i was competent doing my job

knew i was competent doing my job
they<00:38:42.960> knew<00:38:43.119> me<00:38:43.280> as<00:38:43.440> a<00:38:43.520> friend<00:38:44.240> as<00:38:44.480> someone<00:38:44.720> that

they knew me as a friend as someone that

they knew me as a friend as someone that
could<00:38:45.040> be<00:38:45.119> trusted<00:38:46.240> and<00:38:46.400> yet<00:38:46.720> now<00:38:46.880> when<00:38:47.040> they

could be trusted and yet now when they

could be trusted and yet now when they
found<00:38:47.440> out<00:38:47.599> something<00:38:47.920> about<00:38:48.079> my<00:38:48.240> personal

found out something about my personal

found out something about my personal
life

life

life
they<00:38:49.839> had<00:38:50.240> they<00:38:50.400> had<00:38:50.560> to<00:38:50.640> make<00:38:50.880> a<00:38:50.960> conscious

they had they had to make a conscious

they had they had to make a conscious
decision<00:38:51.680> how<00:38:51.839> they<00:38:52.000> were<00:38:52.079> going<00:38:52.160> to<00:38:52.240> treat<00:38:52.480> me

decision how they were going to treat me

decision how they were going to treat me
from<00:38:52.720> that<00:38:52.880> point<00:38:53.119> forward

from that point forward

from that point forward
you<00:38:54.160> know<00:38:54.320> we<00:38:54.480> all<00:38:54.560> went<00:38:54.720> through<00:38:54.960> the<00:38:55.040> same

you know we all went through the same

you know we all went through the same
police<00:38:55.520> academy<00:38:55.920> we<00:38:56.079> all<00:38:56.320> earned<00:38:56.560> the<00:38:56.640> right

police academy we all earned the right

police academy we all earned the right
to<00:38:57.040> be<00:38:57.280> in<00:38:57.359> those<00:38:57.599> uniforms<00:38:58.560> and<00:38:58.720> i<00:38:58.800> was<00:38:58.960> not

to be in those uniforms and i was not

to be in those uniforms and i was not
going<00:38:59.200> to<00:38:59.280> be<00:38:59.440> treated<00:39:00.160> like<00:39:00.320> a<00:39:00.480> second<00:39:00.800> class

going to be treated like a second class

going to be treated like a second class
and<00:39:02.000> i<00:39:02.160> made<00:39:02.320> that<00:39:02.560> known<00:39:02.880> from<00:39:03.119> from<00:39:03.359> day<00:39:03.520> one

and i made that known from from day one

and i made that known from from day one
myself<00:39:04.480> and<00:39:04.640> a<00:39:04.720> number<00:39:04.960> of<00:39:05.119> people<00:39:05.599> who<00:39:06.240> came

myself and a number of people who came

myself and a number of people who came
out<00:39:06.640> around<00:39:06.880> that<00:39:07.119> time<00:39:07.359> were<00:39:07.520> part<00:39:07.760> of<00:39:07.839> the

out around that time were part of the

out around that time were part of the
gay<00:39:08.640> officers<00:39:09.200> action<00:39:09.440> league<00:39:09.599> which<00:39:09.839> is<00:39:09.920> a

gay officers action league which is a

gay officers action league which is a
fraternal<00:39:10.400> organization<00:39:10.960> within<00:39:11.200> the<00:39:11.280> police

fraternal organization within the police

fraternal organization within the police
department

department

department
and<00:39:12.560> we<00:39:12.720> made<00:39:12.880> it<00:39:13.040> a<00:39:13.119> point<00:39:13.440> to<00:39:14.000> kind<00:39:14.160> of<00:39:14.240> make

and we made it a point to kind of make

and we made it a point to kind of make
our<00:39:14.640> way<00:39:14.880> into<00:39:15.119> the<00:39:15.359> training<00:39:15.839> in<00:39:15.920> the<00:39:16.000> police

our way into the training in the police

our way into the training in the police
academy<00:39:16.720> and<00:39:16.880> to<00:39:17.040> change<00:39:17.359> the<00:39:17.599> training<00:39:18.400> as

academy and to change the training as

academy and to change the training as
the<00:39:19.520> lgbt<00:39:20.079> liaison<00:39:20.640> working<00:39:20.880> for<00:39:20.960> the<00:39:21.040> chief

the lgbt liaison working for the chief

the lgbt liaison working for the chief
of<00:39:21.359> community<00:39:21.760> affairs<00:39:22.640> and<00:39:22.800> to<00:39:22.960> address<00:39:23.359> a

of community affairs and to address a

of community affairs and to address a
series<00:39:23.760> of<00:39:23.920> complaints<00:39:24.480> that<00:39:24.640> we<00:39:24.960> the<00:39:25.119> police

series of complaints that we the police

series of complaints that we the police
department<00:39:25.680> was<00:39:25.839> getting<00:39:26.480> on<00:39:26.560> behalf<00:39:26.960> of<00:39:27.040> the

department was getting on behalf of the

department was getting on behalf of the
lgbt<00:39:27.680> community<00:39:28.079> about<00:39:28.400> the<00:39:28.480> way<00:39:28.640> cops<00:39:28.960> were

lgbt community about the way cops were

lgbt community about the way cops were
treating<00:39:29.440> them<00:39:29.760> i'd<00:39:30.000> formed<00:39:30.320> a<00:39:30.800> work<00:39:31.040> group

treating them i'd formed a work group

treating them i'd formed a work group
over<00:39:31.839> six<00:39:32.079> months

over six months

over six months
of<00:39:33.280> lgbt

of lgbt

of lgbt
community-based<00:39:35.680> organizations<00:39:36.880> including

community-based organizations including

community-based organizations including
a<00:39:38.400> number<00:39:38.640> of<00:39:39.040> transgender<00:39:39.599> organizations

a number of transgender organizations

a number of transgender organizations
which<00:39:40.480> was<00:39:40.720> the<00:39:40.880> first<00:39:41.040> time<00:39:41.200> that<00:39:41.359> they<00:39:41.440> had

which was the first time that they had

which was the first time that they had
ever<00:39:41.760> had<00:39:41.920> a<00:39:42.000> seat<00:39:42.240> at<00:39:42.320> the<00:39:42.480> table

ever had a seat at the table

ever had a seat at the table
to<00:39:43.680> talk<00:39:43.920> about<00:39:44.400> changing<00:39:45.280> how<00:39:45.440> the<00:39:45.599> nypd

to talk about changing how the nypd

to talk about changing how the nypd
trains<00:39:46.560> their<00:39:46.720> recruits

trains their recruits

trains their recruits
so<00:39:48.320> they<00:39:48.640> you<00:39:48.720> know<00:39:48.880> we<00:39:48.960> took<00:39:49.200> the<00:39:49.280> three<00:39:49.520> pages

so they you know we took the three pages

so they you know we took the three pages
of<00:39:50.160> reading<00:39:50.480> that<00:39:50.640> they<00:39:50.800> had<00:39:51.119> at<00:39:51.280> the<00:39:51.359> time<00:39:51.920> in

of reading that they had at the time in

of reading that they had at the time in
the<00:39:52.079> police<00:39:52.400> academy<00:39:52.720> manual<00:39:53.599> which<00:39:53.839> was

the police academy manual which was

the police academy manual which was
three<00:39:55.040> pages<00:39:56.000> and<00:39:56.160> it<00:39:56.240> was<00:39:56.400> 20<00:39:56.640> years<00:39:56.880> out<00:39:56.960> of

three pages and it was 20 years out of

three pages and it was 20 years out of
date

date

date
and<00:39:58.560> uh<00:39:58.800> the<00:39:59.359> the<00:39:59.599> commissioner<00:40:00.000> of<00:40:00.160> training

and uh the the commissioner of training

and uh the the commissioner of training
at<00:40:00.480> the<00:40:00.560> time<00:40:00.800> said<00:40:00.960> well<00:40:01.119> can<00:40:01.280> you<00:40:01.440> do<00:40:01.599> better

at the time said well can you do better

at the time said well can you do better
and<00:40:02.000> we<00:40:02.160> said<00:40:02.400> yes

and we said yes

and we said yes
and<00:40:04.000> uh<00:40:04.480> the

and uh the

and uh the
overwhelming<00:40:06.000> majority<00:40:06.400> of<00:40:06.480> that<00:40:06.640> material

overwhelming majority of that material

overwhelming majority of that material
of<00:40:07.359> probably<00:40:07.599> around<00:40:07.839> 80<00:40:08.079> or<00:40:08.160> 90<00:40:08.640> of<00:40:08.720> it<00:40:08.800> was

of probably around 80 or 90 of it was

of probably around 80 or 90 of it was
rewritten

rewritten

rewritten
by<00:40:10.640> the<00:40:10.800> lgbt<00:40:11.359> community

by the lgbt community

by the lgbt community
and<00:40:12.960> it<00:40:13.040> was<00:40:13.200> that<00:40:13.359> now<00:40:13.520> there's<00:40:13.760> a<00:40:13.839> whole

and it was that now there's a whole

and it was that now there's a whole
gender<00:40:14.319> identity<00:40:14.880> section<00:40:15.440> that<00:40:15.599> never

gender identity section that never

gender identity section that never
existed<00:40:16.319> before<00:40:17.119> there's<00:40:17.359> a<00:40:17.440> whole<00:40:17.680> lgbt

existed before there's a whole lgbt

existed before there's a whole lgbt
youth<00:40:18.560> section<00:40:18.880> that<00:40:19.040> never<00:40:19.280> existed<00:40:19.680> before

youth section that never existed before

youth section that never existed before
so<00:40:20.960> there's<00:40:21.280> a<00:40:21.359> lot<00:40:21.520> of

so there's a lot of

so there's a lot of
you<00:40:22.319> know<00:40:22.640> current<00:40:22.960> and<00:40:23.040> concise<00:40:23.520> information

you know current and concise information

you know current and concise information
that<00:40:24.240> exists<00:40:24.640> now<00:40:25.040> in<00:40:25.200> the<00:40:25.359> training

that exists now in the training

that exists now in the training
materials<00:40:26.160> that<00:40:26.240> didn't<00:40:26.480> exist<00:40:26.800> prior<00:40:26.960> to

materials that didn't exist prior to

materials that didn't exist prior to
2008.

2008.

2008.
i<00:40:29.920> identify<00:40:30.560> as<00:40:30.800> an<00:40:31.040> artist<00:40:31.680> like<00:40:32.400> a<00:40:32.480> comedian

i identify as an artist like a comedian

i identify as an artist like a comedian
and<00:40:33.359> a<00:40:33.440> playwright

and a playwright

and a playwright
i<00:40:35.680> guess<00:40:35.920> a

i guess a

i guess a
heterosexual<00:40:37.760> girl<00:40:38.400> you<00:40:38.480> know<00:40:38.640> woman<00:40:39.200> i<00:40:39.359> just

heterosexual girl you know woman i just

heterosexual girl you know woman i just
never<00:40:39.839> felt<00:40:40.079> comfortable<00:40:40.480> being<00:40:40.960> like<00:40:41.280> super

never felt comfortable being like super

never felt comfortable being like super
feminine<00:40:42.160> i<00:40:42.240> think<00:40:42.400> that<00:40:42.560> takes<00:40:42.800> away<00:40:43.040> my

feminine i think that takes away my

feminine i think that takes away my
power<00:40:43.920> like<00:40:44.079> when<00:40:44.240> i<00:40:44.319> say<00:40:44.480> super<00:40:44.800> feminine

power like when i say super feminine

power like when i say super feminine
like<00:40:45.599> i<00:40:45.760> mean<00:40:46.000> like<00:40:46.240> wearing<00:40:46.640> like<00:40:46.880> dresses

like i mean like wearing like dresses

like i mean like wearing like dresses
and<00:40:47.599> heels<00:40:48.319> i<00:40:48.480> feel<00:40:48.720> like<00:40:48.960> in<00:40:49.280> in<00:40:49.760> bags<00:40:50.160> i<00:40:50.319> feel

and heels i feel like in in bags i feel

and heels i feel like in in bags i feel
like<00:40:50.720> i'm<00:40:50.880> being<00:40:51.839> uh

like i'm being uh

like i'm being uh
just<00:40:53.359> circumscribed

just circumscribed

just circumscribed
to<00:40:55.359> a<00:40:55.839> way<00:40:56.079> of<00:40:56.240> being<00:40:56.560> in<00:40:56.640> a<00:40:56.720> way<00:40:56.880> of<00:40:57.040> acting<00:40:57.520> and

to a way of being in a way of acting and

to a way of being in a way of acting and
i<00:40:57.760> don't<00:40:58.079> feel<00:40:58.319> that<00:40:58.480> it's<00:40:58.640> powerful

i don't feel that it's powerful

i don't feel that it's powerful
i<00:40:59.760> don't<00:41:00.000> feel<00:41:00.160> that<00:41:00.319> it's<00:41:00.480> powerful<00:41:01.119> that

i don't feel that it's powerful that

i don't feel that it's powerful that
like<00:41:02.079> if<00:41:02.240> i<00:41:02.319> can't<00:41:02.640> like<00:41:02.960> run<00:41:03.200> in<00:41:03.359> my<00:41:03.599> shoes<00:41:04.000> or

like if i can't like run in my shoes or

like if i can't like run in my shoes or
walk<00:41:04.560> comfortably<00:41:05.040> in<00:41:05.119> my<00:41:05.280> shoes<00:41:06.160> so<00:41:06.720> um<00:41:06.960> i

walk comfortably in my shoes so um i

walk comfortably in my shoes so um i
feel<00:41:07.440> powerful<00:41:07.920> the<00:41:08.000> way<00:41:08.160> that<00:41:08.319> i<00:41:08.480> dress

feel powerful the way that i dress

feel powerful the way that i dress
i<00:41:09.760> have<00:41:09.920> a<00:41:10.160> husband<00:41:10.560> and<00:41:10.720> i<00:41:10.800> have<00:41:11.040> two<00:41:11.280> children

i have a husband and i have two children

i have a husband and i have two children
they're<00:41:12.160> totally<00:41:12.560> amazing<00:41:12.960> they've<00:41:13.200> never

they're totally amazing they've never

they're totally amazing they've never
said<00:41:13.680> anything<00:41:14.000> to<00:41:14.160> me<00:41:14.400> they<00:41:14.640> may<00:41:15.280> you<00:41:15.359> know

said anything to me they may you know

said anything to me they may you know
sometimes<00:41:15.920> i<00:41:16.000> wonder<00:41:16.240> if<00:41:16.319> my<00:41:16.400> daughter<00:41:16.720> thinks

sometimes i wonder if my daughter thinks

sometimes i wonder if my daughter thinks
that<00:41:17.200> i'm

that i'm

that i'm
i'm<00:41:18.400> too<00:41:18.640> manish<00:41:19.040> looking<00:41:20.000> but<00:41:20.240> i<00:41:20.319> think<00:41:20.560> they

i'm too manish looking but i think they

i'm too manish looking but i think they
may<00:41:20.880> be<00:41:20.960> too<00:41:21.200> afraid<00:41:21.520> to<00:41:21.599> say<00:41:21.760> anything<00:41:22.079> to<00:41:22.240> me

may be too afraid to say anything to me

may be too afraid to say anything to me
because<00:41:24.000> they<00:41:24.079> kind<00:41:24.240> of<00:41:24.319> give<00:41:24.480> off<00:41:24.640> that

because they kind of give off that

because they kind of give off that
appearance<00:41:25.440> but<00:41:26.079> you<00:41:26.160> know<00:41:26.319> we<00:41:26.560> talked<00:41:26.800> about

appearance but you know we talked about

appearance but you know we talked about
stuff<00:41:27.440> and<00:41:28.000> um<00:41:28.480> talked<00:41:28.720> about<00:41:29.040> how<00:41:29.280> you<00:41:29.440> look

stuff and um talked about how you look

stuff and um talked about how you look
and<00:41:30.400> um

and um

and um
you<00:41:31.359> know<00:41:31.520> i<00:41:31.680> told<00:41:32.079> you<00:41:32.160> know<00:41:32.319> i've<00:41:32.400> said<00:41:32.640> her

you know i told you know i've said her

you know i told you know i've said her
that<00:41:33.040> i'm<00:41:33.119> not<00:41:33.359> comfortable<00:41:34.319> being<00:41:34.560> that<00:41:34.800> way

that i'm not comfortable being that way

that i'm not comfortable being that way
um<00:41:35.760> like<00:41:36.000> doing<00:41:36.240> my<00:41:36.319> nails<00:41:36.720> and<00:41:36.880> everything<00:41:37.280> i

um like doing my nails and everything i

um like doing my nails and everything i
just<00:41:38.000> i<00:41:38.079> would<00:41:38.240> just<00:41:38.480> feel<00:41:38.720> very<00:41:39.040> weird

just i would just feel very weird

just i would just feel very weird
walking<00:41:39.760> around

walking around

walking around
you<00:41:40.880> know<00:41:41.280> so<00:41:41.680> and<00:41:41.920> i<00:41:42.000> took<00:41:42.160> you<00:41:42.240> know<00:41:42.400> i<00:41:42.480> told

you know so and i took you know i told

you know so and i took you know i told
her<00:41:42.720> there's<00:41:42.960> a<00:41:43.040> spectrum<00:41:43.599> and<00:41:43.920> actually

her there's a spectrum and actually

her there's a spectrum and actually
that's<00:41:44.400> what<00:41:44.560> makes<00:41:44.800> the<00:41:44.960> world<00:41:45.200> really<00:41:45.520> cool

that's what makes the world really cool

that's what makes the world really cool
is<00:41:46.880> all<00:41:46.960> the<00:41:47.119> different<00:41:47.359> colors<00:41:47.599> in<00:41:47.760> the<00:41:47.839> world

is all the different colors in the world

is all the different colors in the world
you<00:41:48.319> know<00:41:48.400> what<00:41:48.480> i<00:41:48.560> mean<00:41:48.800> like<00:41:49.119> why<00:41:49.440> does

you know what i mean like why does

you know what i mean like why does
everybody<00:41:49.920> want<00:41:50.079> to<00:41:50.160> be<00:41:50.319> this<00:41:50.480> age<00:41:50.720> i<00:41:50.800> was<00:41:50.960> in

everybody want to be this age i was in

everybody want to be this age i was in
florida<00:41:51.359> for<00:41:51.440> a<00:41:51.520> long<00:41:51.760> time<00:41:52.400> so<00:41:52.560> i<00:41:52.720> saw<00:41:53.359> the

florida for a long time so i saw the

florida for a long time so i saw the
uh<00:41:54.400> barbie<00:41:54.880> blonde

uh barbie blonde

uh barbie blonde
heels<00:41:56.720> manicured<00:41:57.440> like<00:41:57.599> that<00:41:57.760> french

heels manicured like that french

heels manicured like that french
manicure<00:41:58.480> and<00:41:58.640> everything<00:41:58.880> and<00:41:59.359> listen<00:41:59.680> if

manicure and everything and listen if

manicure and everything and listen if
you<00:41:59.839> want<00:42:00.000> to<00:42:00.079> be<00:42:00.160> that<00:42:00.319> way<00:42:00.560> like<00:42:00.800> that's

you want to be that way like that's

you want to be that way like that's
great<00:42:01.440> because<00:42:01.760> that's<00:42:02.000> an<00:42:02.160> art<00:42:02.480> too<00:42:02.720> and<00:42:02.800> i

great because that's an art too and i

great because that's an art too and i
can<00:42:03.200> appreciate<00:42:03.760> it<00:42:03.839> that<00:42:04.000> way

can appreciate it that way

can appreciate it that way
but<00:42:05.920> when<00:42:06.480> when<00:42:06.880> when<00:42:07.200> i<00:42:07.440> start<00:42:07.680> getting<00:42:08.000> the

but when when when i start getting the

but when when when i start getting the
bullying<00:42:08.640> from<00:42:08.800> women<00:42:09.119> that's<00:42:09.359> the<00:42:09.760> the<00:42:10.000> one

bullying from women that's the the one

bullying from women that's the the one
once<00:42:10.720> over<00:42:11.040> the<00:42:11.359> the<00:42:11.680> total<00:42:12.079> up<00:42:12.240> and<00:42:12.319> down<00:42:12.800> and

once over the the total up and down and

once over the the total up and down and
they<00:42:13.040> make<00:42:13.200> sure<00:42:13.359> that<00:42:13.520> you<00:42:13.760> see<00:42:14.079> that<00:42:14.240> they're

they make sure that you see that they're

they make sure that you see that they're
doing<00:42:14.839> that<00:42:15.680> um<00:42:16.160> that's<00:42:16.400> when<00:42:16.560> it<00:42:16.640> gets<00:42:16.880> really

doing that um that's when it gets really

doing that um that's when it gets really
irritating<00:42:17.760> you<00:42:17.920> know<00:42:18.560> there's<00:42:19.040> overt<00:42:19.599> really

irritating you know there's overt really

irritating you know there's overt really
overt<00:42:20.640> kind<00:42:20.880> of<00:42:20.960> discrimination<00:42:21.839> that<00:42:22.000> i<00:42:22.160> have

overt kind of discrimination that i have

overt kind of discrimination that i have
been<00:42:22.480> through<00:42:22.800> and<00:42:22.880> there's<00:42:23.280> like<00:42:23.520> real<00:42:23.760> this

been through and there's like real this

been through and there's like real this
more<00:42:24.319> subtle<00:42:24.640> forms<00:42:24.960> like<00:42:25.040> when<00:42:25.280> i<00:42:25.359> was<00:42:25.520> in<00:42:26.000> the

more subtle forms like when i was in the

more subtle forms like when i was in the
financial<00:42:26.640> district<00:42:27.119> on<00:42:27.280> wall<00:42:27.520> street

financial district on wall street

financial district on wall street
um<00:42:28.560> the<00:42:28.720> guys<00:42:28.960> would<00:42:29.119> say<00:42:29.280> yeah<00:42:29.520> she's<00:42:29.680> gonna

um the guys would say yeah she's gonna

um the guys would say yeah she's gonna
have<00:42:30.000> a<00:42:30.079> kid

have a kid

have a kid
that<00:42:31.040> was<00:42:31.200> a<00:42:31.280> kiss<00:42:31.520> of<00:42:31.680> death<00:42:32.400> you<00:42:32.560> know<00:42:33.119> it's

that was a kiss of death you know it's

that was a kiss of death you know it's
like<00:42:33.599> wait<00:42:33.760> a<00:42:33.839> minute<00:42:34.160> like<00:42:34.400> you<00:42:34.560> have<00:42:34.720> a

like wait a minute like you have a

like wait a minute like you have a
you're<00:42:35.119> gonna<00:42:35.280> have<00:42:35.440> a<00:42:35.520> kid<00:42:35.680> too<00:42:36.160> like<00:42:36.560> when

you're gonna have a kid too like when

you're gonna have a kid too like when
you<00:42:36.960> heard<00:42:37.520> the<00:42:37.680> guys<00:42:38.079> in<00:42:38.160> the<00:42:38.319> office<00:42:38.720> say

you heard the guys in the office say

you heard the guys in the office say
something<00:42:39.280> like<00:42:39.520> that

something like that

something like that
you<00:42:40.480> knew<00:42:40.720> that<00:42:41.040> that<00:42:41.200> was<00:42:41.440> like<00:42:41.599> the<00:42:41.760> kiss<00:42:42.000> of

you knew that that was like the kiss of

you knew that that was like the kiss of
death<00:42:42.319> for<00:42:42.480> that<00:42:42.640> woman

death for that woman

death for that woman
that<00:42:43.920> it<00:42:44.079> just<00:42:44.400> was<00:42:44.960> so<00:42:45.119> that's<00:42:45.280> why<00:42:45.440> i<00:42:45.520> never

that it just was so that's why i never

that it just was so that's why i never
wore<00:42:45.920> my<00:42:46.079> ring<00:42:46.319> so<00:42:46.480> i<00:42:46.640> never<00:42:46.880> talked<00:42:47.040> about<00:42:47.280> my

wore my ring so i never talked about my

wore my ring so i never talked about my
family<00:42:47.760> one<00:42:47.920> thing<00:42:48.079> that<00:42:48.160> used<00:42:48.400> to<00:42:48.480> bother<00:42:48.720> me

family one thing that used to bother me

family one thing that used to bother me
was<00:42:49.040> that<00:42:49.200> new<00:42:49.359> york<00:42:49.520> telephone<00:42:50.000> the<00:42:50.079> men

was that new york telephone the men

was that new york telephone the men
would<00:42:50.480> talk<00:42:50.720> freely<00:42:51.040> about<00:42:51.280> their<00:42:51.440> families

would talk freely about their families

would talk freely about their families
all<00:42:52.079> the<00:42:52.240> time

all the time

all the time
i<00:42:53.520> never<00:42:53.760> talked<00:42:54.000> about<00:42:54.240> my<00:42:54.480> family<00:42:54.960> but<00:42:55.119> i

i never talked about my family but i

i never talked about my family but i
have<00:42:55.359> to<00:42:55.440> tell<00:42:55.680> you

have to tell you

have to tell you
it's<00:42:56.800> like<00:42:57.040> you<00:42:57.200> go<00:42:57.359> to<00:42:57.520> work<00:42:58.160> and<00:42:58.319> you're<00:42:58.560> not

it's like you go to work and you're not

it's like you go to work and you're not
who<00:42:59.040> you<00:42:59.280> are

who you are

who you are
you<00:43:00.319> know<00:43:00.480> what<00:43:00.560> i<00:43:00.640> mean<00:43:00.800> these<00:43:00.960> guys<00:43:01.200> were

you know what i mean these guys were

you know what i mean these guys were
coming<00:43:01.760> their<00:43:01.920> kids<00:43:02.160> were<00:43:02.319> my<00:43:02.560> age

coming their kids were my age

coming their kids were my age
they<00:43:03.760> were<00:43:03.839> like<00:43:04.000> oh<00:43:04.160> he<00:43:04.240> took<00:43:04.400> his<00:43:04.560> first

they were like oh he took his first

they were like oh he took his first
steps

steps

steps
and<00:43:06.000> i'd<00:43:06.160> be<00:43:06.319> like<00:43:06.480> wow<00:43:06.720> that's<00:43:06.960> really<00:43:07.119> cool

and i'd be like wow that's really cool

and i'd be like wow that's really cool
and<00:43:08.000> i<00:43:08.079> wouldn't<00:43:08.319> talk<00:43:08.480> about<00:43:08.640> it<00:43:08.720> because<00:43:08.960> if

and i wouldn't talk about it because if

and i wouldn't talk about it because if
i<00:43:09.280> talked<00:43:09.520> about<00:43:09.760> it

i talked about it

i talked about it
it<00:43:10.800> would<00:43:10.960> be<00:43:11.200> that's<00:43:11.920> oh<00:43:12.079> she's<00:43:12.400> only<00:43:12.560> going

it would be that's oh she's only going

it would be that's oh she's only going
to<00:43:12.800> have<00:43:12.960> this<00:43:13.119> job<00:43:13.359> for<00:43:13.440> a<00:43:13.520> couple<00:43:13.839> years<00:43:14.560> and

to have this job for a couple years and

to have this job for a couple years and
then<00:43:14.880> she's<00:43:15.119> going<00:43:15.200> to<00:43:15.359> leave

then she's going to leave

then she's going to leave
and<00:43:16.480> you<00:43:16.560> know<00:43:16.720> what<00:43:17.119> they<00:43:17.359> kind<00:43:17.520> of<00:43:17.599> make<00:43:17.839> it<00:43:18.079> i

and you know what they kind of make it i

and you know what they kind of make it i
i<00:43:18.560> would<00:43:18.880> my<00:43:19.119> experience<00:43:19.599> has<00:43:19.680> been<00:43:20.160> that<00:43:20.400> they

i would my experience has been that they

i would my experience has been that they
make<00:43:20.800> it<00:43:20.960> that<00:43:21.119> way<00:43:21.839> they<00:43:22.480> you<00:43:22.640> know<00:43:22.880> if<00:43:23.119> you

make it that way they you know if you

make it that way they you know if you
want<00:43:23.520> my<00:43:23.760> loyalty

want my loyalty

want my loyalty
then<00:43:25.119> earn<00:43:25.440> it<00:43:25.920> like<00:43:26.160> and<00:43:26.319> i'm<00:43:26.400> not<00:43:26.560> trying<00:43:26.800> to

then earn it like and i'm not trying to

then earn it like and i'm not trying to
come<00:43:27.119> from<00:43:27.280> like<00:43:27.520> a<00:43:27.839> an<00:43:28.480> um<00:43:29.119> and<00:43:29.440> uh<00:43:29.680> entitled

come from like a an um and uh entitled

come from like a an um and uh entitled
attitude<00:43:31.040> but<00:43:31.200> you<00:43:31.359> know<00:43:31.520> what<00:43:31.839> if<00:43:32.079> you're

attitude but you know what if you're

attitude but you know what if you're
going<00:43:32.480> to<00:43:32.800> make<00:43:32.960> me<00:43:33.200> second<00:43:33.599> class<00:43:34.000> all<00:43:34.160> the

going to make me second class all the

going to make me second class all the
time<00:43:34.560> and<00:43:34.720> i<00:43:34.800> have<00:43:34.960> to<00:43:35.119> do<00:43:35.359> all<00:43:35.599> these<00:43:35.839> things

time and i have to do all these things

time and i have to do all these things
to<00:43:36.240> prevent<00:43:36.880> i'm<00:43:37.040> going<00:43:37.119> to<00:43:37.200> tell<00:43:37.359> you

to prevent i'm going to tell you

to prevent i'm going to tell you
something<00:43:37.760> else<00:43:37.920> i<00:43:38.160> i<00:43:38.319> did<00:43:38.480> get<00:43:38.720> pregnant<00:43:39.040> when

something else i i did get pregnant when

something else i i did get pregnant when
i<00:43:39.280> was<00:43:39.440> at<00:43:39.520> new<00:43:39.680> york<00:43:39.839> telephone

i was at new york telephone

i was at new york telephone
i

i

i
didn't<00:43:42.560> tell<00:43:42.800> anybody<00:43:43.599> i<00:43:43.760> swear<00:43:44.000> to<00:43:44.079> god<00:43:44.400> it

didn't tell anybody i swear to god it

didn't tell anybody i swear to god it
wasn't<00:43:44.800> until<00:43:45.040> they<00:43:45.359> i<00:43:45.520> came<00:43:45.760> in<00:43:45.920> and<00:43:46.079> i<00:43:46.240> was

wasn't until they i came in and i was

wasn't until they i came in and i was
like<00:43:46.640> starting<00:43:46.960> a<00:43:47.040> show<00:43:47.520> they<00:43:47.680> were<00:43:47.760> like<00:43:47.920> are

like starting a show they were like are

like starting a show they were like are
you<00:43:48.079> pregnant<00:43:48.319> i'm<00:43:48.400> like<00:43:48.560> no<00:43:48.720> i'm<00:43:48.800> just

you pregnant i'm like no i'm just

you pregnant i'm like no i'm just
gaining<00:43:49.200> weight<00:43:49.359> like<00:43:49.599> i<00:43:49.839> freaking<00:43:50.319> lied<00:43:51.119> for

gaining weight like i freaking lied for

gaining weight like i freaking lied for
like<00:43:51.680> two<00:43:51.920> weeks<00:43:52.160> when<00:43:52.319> that<00:43:52.480> was<00:43:52.640> really

like two weeks when that was really

like two weeks when that was really
obvious<00:43:53.839> and<00:43:54.000> i<00:43:54.079> did<00:43:54.240> that<00:43:54.480> because<00:43:54.800> it<00:43:54.880> was

obvious and i did that because it was

obvious and i did that because it was
like

like

like
because<00:43:56.560> i<00:43:56.720> knew<00:43:56.960> once<00:43:57.200> i<00:43:57.280> said<00:43:57.520> i<00:43:57.599> was

because i knew once i said i was

because i knew once i said i was
pregnant<00:43:58.319> i<00:43:58.400> would<00:43:58.560> be<00:43:58.720> eliminated<00:43:59.680> from

pregnant i would be eliminated from

pregnant i would be eliminated from
estimate<00:44:00.400> cases<00:44:00.720> they<00:44:00.960> would<00:44:01.119> take<00:44:01.359> me<00:44:01.599> off

estimate cases they would take me off

estimate cases they would take me off
estimate<00:44:02.400> cases<00:44:03.200> when<00:44:03.440> i<00:44:03.680> interviewed<00:44:04.240> for

estimate cases when i interviewed for

estimate cases when i interviewed for
new<00:44:04.560> york<00:44:04.800> telephone

new york telephone

new york telephone
um

um

um
they<00:44:07.440> asked<00:44:07.599> me<00:44:07.920> if<00:44:08.079> i<00:44:08.160> was<00:44:08.319> pregnant

they asked me if i was pregnant

they asked me if i was pregnant
this<00:44:10.240> was<00:44:10.400> 1991<00:44:11.200> it<00:44:11.280> was<00:44:11.440> totally<00:44:11.680> against<00:44:12.000> the

this was 1991 it was totally against the

this was 1991 it was totally against the
law<00:44:12.640> but<00:44:12.800> i<00:44:12.880> had<00:44:13.119> just<00:44:13.440> come<00:44:13.680> out<00:44:14.000> of<00:44:14.480> a<00:44:14.720> school

law but i had just come out of a school

law but i had just come out of a school
and<00:44:15.599> i<00:44:15.680> worked<00:44:15.839> so<00:44:16.000> hard<00:44:16.240> in<00:44:16.400> my<00:44:16.560> school

and i worked so hard in my school

and i worked so hard in my school
it<00:44:17.520> was<00:44:17.760> like<00:44:18.240> i<00:44:18.400> knew<00:44:18.560> this<00:44:18.800> was

it was like i knew this was

it was like i knew this was
discrimination<00:44:19.599> i<00:44:19.760> knew<00:44:19.920> this<00:44:20.079> was<00:44:20.240> illegal

discrimination i knew this was illegal

discrimination i knew this was illegal
but<00:44:21.040> i<00:44:21.119> wasn't<00:44:21.359> going<00:44:21.440> to<00:44:21.520> say<00:44:21.680> anything

but i wasn't going to say anything

but i wasn't going to say anything
because<00:44:22.240> i'm<00:44:22.400> just<00:44:22.720> i'm<00:44:22.960> just<00:44:23.119> trying<00:44:23.359> to<00:44:23.520> i

because i'm just i'm just trying to i

because i'm just i'm just trying to i
just<00:44:23.760> want<00:44:23.920> to<00:44:24.000> fit<00:44:24.240> in<00:44:24.400> at<00:44:24.560> that<00:44:24.800> time<00:44:25.200> i<00:44:25.440> i<00:44:25.520> was

just want to fit in at that time i i was

just want to fit in at that time i i was
under<00:44:25.920> the<00:44:26.079> impression<00:44:26.400> that<00:44:26.560> i<00:44:26.640> wanted<00:44:26.880> to<00:44:26.960> be

under the impression that i wanted to be

under the impression that i wanted to be
one<00:44:27.280> of<00:44:27.359> the<00:44:27.440> boys<00:44:28.240> i<00:44:28.319> didn't<00:44:28.560> understand<00:44:28.960> i

one of the boys i didn't understand i

one of the boys i didn't understand i
would<00:44:29.280> never<00:44:29.599> be<00:44:29.839> one<00:44:30.079> of<00:44:30.160> the<00:44:30.240> boys<00:44:30.880> but<00:44:31.040> at

would never be one of the boys but at

would never be one of the boys but at
that<00:44:31.280> time<00:44:31.520> i<00:44:31.599> was<00:44:31.760> trying<00:44:32.000> really<00:44:32.240> hard<00:44:32.720> i<00:44:33.119> had

that time i was trying really hard i had

that time i was trying really hard i had
to<00:44:33.839> go<00:44:34.480> to<00:44:34.960> a<00:44:35.200> gynecologist

to go to a gynecologist

to go to a gynecologist
and<00:44:37.359> take<00:44:37.680> a<00:44:37.839> pregnancy<00:44:38.400> test

and take a pregnancy test

and take a pregnancy test
and<00:44:40.000> i<00:44:40.160> had<00:44:40.400> to<00:44:40.560> sign<00:44:40.880> paperwork

and i had to sign paperwork

and i had to sign paperwork
that<00:44:42.480> said<00:44:42.880> is<00:44:42.960> there<00:44:43.280> anything<00:44:43.599> that<00:44:43.760> will

that said is there anything that will

that said is there anything that will
prevent<00:44:44.319> you<00:44:44.560> from<00:44:44.800> working<00:44:45.440> in<00:44:45.599> the<00:44:45.760> next<00:44:46.079> 12

prevent you from working in the next 12

prevent you from working in the next 12
months

months

months
totally<00:44:49.280> illegal

totally illegal

totally illegal
and<00:44:50.720> i<00:44:51.040> i<00:44:51.280> talked<00:44:51.599> i<00:44:51.680> have<00:44:51.839> lawyers<00:44:52.240> in<00:44:52.319> my

and i i talked i have lawyers in my

and i i talked i have lawyers in my
family<00:44:52.720> and<00:44:52.800> they're<00:44:52.960> like<00:44:53.119> dude<00:44:53.440> you<00:44:53.520> could

family and they're like dude you could

family and they're like dude you could
you<00:44:54.400> could<00:44:54.560> really<00:44:54.880> sue<00:44:55.520> and<00:44:55.680> i'm<00:44:55.760> like<00:44:56.000> that's

you could really sue and i'm like that's

you could really sue and i'm like that's
not<00:44:56.560> my<00:44:56.800> point<00:44:57.119> in<00:44:57.200> life

not my point in life

not my point in life
i'm<00:44:58.560> an<00:44:58.720> engineer<00:44:59.440> i<00:44:59.599> want<00:44:59.760> to<00:44:59.920> like<00:45:00.240> work<00:45:00.560> on

i'm an engineer i want to like work on

i'm an engineer i want to like work on
computers<00:45:01.200> and<00:45:01.280> solve<00:45:01.520> people's<00:45:01.920> problems

computers and solve people's problems

computers and solve people's problems
yeah<00:45:03.280> that's<00:45:03.440> some<00:45:03.680> of<00:45:03.760> the<00:45:03.839> stuff<00:45:04.000> that<00:45:04.240> i've

yeah that's some of the stuff that i've

yeah that's some of the stuff that i've
been<00:45:04.560> through<00:45:04.880> i'm<00:45:05.119> a<00:45:05.359> cis<00:45:05.680> female<00:45:06.160> i<00:45:06.319> use<00:45:06.560> she

been through i'm a cis female i use she

been through i'm a cis female i use she
her<00:45:06.960> pronouns<00:45:07.599> and<00:45:07.839> i<00:45:07.920> also<00:45:08.319> identify<00:45:08.800> as<00:45:08.960> an

her pronouns and i also identify as an

her pronouns and i also identify as an
intersectional<00:45:09.680> feminist

intersectional feminist

intersectional feminist
feminism<00:45:11.760> is<00:45:12.400> focuses<00:45:12.880> mainly<00:45:13.200> on<00:45:13.280> the

feminism is focuses mainly on the

feminism is focuses mainly on the
inequalities<00:45:14.000> women<00:45:14.319> face<00:45:14.560> in<00:45:14.640> society<00:45:15.440> but

inequalities women face in society but

inequalities women face in society but
intersectional<00:45:16.319> feminism<00:45:16.960> looks<00:45:17.280> to

intersectional feminism looks to

intersectional feminism looks to
understand<00:45:18.079> how<00:45:18.240> like<00:45:18.640> race<00:45:19.440> and<00:45:19.599> sexuality

understand how like race and sexuality

understand how like race and sexuality
and<00:45:20.640> religion<00:45:21.359> and<00:45:21.520> ethnicity<00:45:22.079> play<00:45:22.400> into

and religion and ethnicity play into

and religion and ethnicity play into
those<00:45:23.440> systems<00:45:23.839> of<00:45:24.079> oppression<00:45:24.640> as<00:45:24.800> well

those systems of oppression as well

those systems of oppression as well
feminism<00:45:26.000> while<00:45:26.240> it<00:45:26.400> focuses<00:45:27.119> on<00:45:27.760> women<00:45:28.240> it

feminism while it focuses on women it

feminism while it focuses on women it
really<00:45:28.720> helps<00:45:29.119> everyone<00:45:29.839> because<00:45:30.079> men<00:45:30.319> are

really helps everyone because men are

really helps everyone because men are
definitely<00:45:31.040> hurt<00:45:31.280> by<00:45:31.440> patriarchy<00:45:32.079> as<00:45:32.240> well

definitely hurt by patriarchy as well

definitely hurt by patriarchy as well
like<00:45:32.640> the<00:45:32.800> idea<00:45:33.200> that<00:45:33.760> men<00:45:34.079> can't<00:45:34.319> cry<00:45:34.800> or<00:45:35.119> men

like the idea that men can't cry or men

like the idea that men can't cry or men
have<00:45:35.599> to<00:45:36.240> you<00:45:36.319> know<00:45:36.560> put<00:45:36.720> on<00:45:36.880> this<00:45:37.119> like

have to you know put on this like

have to you know put on this like
strong<00:45:38.240> face<00:45:38.480> all<00:45:38.640> the<00:45:38.720> time<00:45:38.880> and<00:45:38.960> like<00:45:39.359> so

strong face all the time and like so

strong face all the time and like so
many<00:45:39.760> more<00:45:40.000> men<00:45:40.240> commit<00:45:40.560> suicide<00:45:41.200> and<00:45:41.280> i<00:45:41.359> think

many more men commit suicide and i think

many more men commit suicide and i think
probably<00:45:42.079> part<00:45:42.319> of<00:45:42.400> it<00:45:42.560> is<00:45:42.640> because<00:45:43.520> they

probably part of it is because they

probably part of it is because they
can't<00:45:44.240> express<00:45:44.640> emotion<00:45:45.119> they're<00:45:45.280> taught

can't express emotion they're taught

can't express emotion they're taught
they<00:45:45.680> have<00:45:45.760> to<00:45:45.920> be<00:45:46.160> strong<00:45:46.640> and<00:45:46.960> have<00:45:47.119> a<00:45:47.200> stiff

they have to be strong and have a stiff

they have to be strong and have a stiff
upper<00:45:47.680> lip<00:45:47.920> all<00:45:48.079> the<00:45:48.240> time<00:45:48.480> and<00:45:48.800> that's<00:45:49.119> part

upper lip all the time and that's part

upper lip all the time and that's part
of<00:45:49.359> patriarchy<00:45:50.079> that<00:45:50.240> says<00:45:50.880> showing<00:45:51.200> emotion

of patriarchy that says showing emotion

of patriarchy that says showing emotion
and<00:45:51.760> crying<00:45:52.560> is<00:45:52.800> weak<00:45:53.040> and<00:45:53.119> that's<00:45:53.359> something

and crying is weak and that's something

and crying is weak and that's something
women<00:45:53.920> do<00:45:54.240> because<00:45:54.480> women<00:45:54.800> are<00:45:54.880> the<00:45:54.960> weaker

women do because women are the weaker

women do because women are the weaker
sex<00:45:55.839> and<00:45:56.000> things<00:45:56.240> like

sex and things like

sex and things like
little<00:45:57.280> boys<00:45:57.520> who<00:45:57.680> wear<00:45:57.920> dresses<00:45:58.640> and<00:45:58.880> you

little boys who wear dresses and you

little boys who wear dresses and you
know<00:45:59.359> their<00:45:59.599> parents<00:45:59.920> are<00:46:00.000> trying<00:46:00.160> to<00:46:00.240> like

know their parents are trying to like

know their parents are trying to like
you<00:46:00.720> know<00:46:00.880> correct<00:46:01.359> it<00:46:01.520> but<00:46:01.680> it's<00:46:01.839> just<00:46:02.319> little

you know correct it but it's just little

you know correct it but it's just little
kids<00:46:02.880> don't<00:46:03.200> see<00:46:03.520> gender<00:46:03.920> and<00:46:04.000> i<00:46:04.079> don't<00:46:04.319> and<00:46:04.560> by

kids don't see gender and i don't and by

kids don't see gender and i don't and by
correcting<00:46:05.280> it<00:46:05.440> you're<00:46:05.599> like<00:46:05.920> planting<00:46:06.240> that

correcting it you're like planting that

correcting it you're like planting that
seed

seed

seed
that<00:46:07.760> you<00:46:07.920> know<00:46:08.240> starts<00:46:08.560> the<00:46:08.640> whole<00:46:08.800> cycle

that you know starts the whole cycle

that you know starts the whole cycle
over

over

over
um<00:46:10.480> so<00:46:10.880> these<00:46:11.119> are<00:46:11.200> definitely<00:46:11.599> things<00:46:11.839> that

um so these are definitely things that

um so these are definitely things that
help<00:46:12.560> everybody<00:46:13.359> and<00:46:13.440> benefit<00:46:13.920> everybody

help everybody and benefit everybody

help everybody and benefit everybody
because<00:46:14.480> feminism<00:46:15.040> wants<00:46:15.280> to<00:46:15.359> get<00:46:15.520> rid<00:46:15.760> of

because feminism wants to get rid of

because feminism wants to get rid of
patriarchal<00:46:16.480> system<00:46:16.880> that<00:46:17.440> hurts<00:46:17.839> both<00:46:18.079> men

patriarchal system that hurts both men

patriarchal system that hurts both men
and<00:46:18.480> women

and women

and women
well<00:46:20.000> i<00:46:20.400> identify<00:46:20.960> myself<00:46:21.440> as<00:46:21.680> more<00:46:21.920> of<00:46:22.000> an

well i identify myself as more of an

well i identify myself as more of an
awareness<00:46:23.119> i<00:46:23.359> believe<00:46:23.599> that<00:46:23.839> my<00:46:24.079> body<00:46:24.480> isn't

awareness i believe that my body isn't

awareness i believe that my body isn't
really<00:46:25.280> me<00:46:25.760> i'm<00:46:26.160> like<00:46:26.560> this<00:46:26.960> other<00:46:27.359> thing<00:46:27.680> you

really me i'm like this other thing you

really me i'm like this other thing you
know<00:46:28.000> i'm<00:46:28.079> something<00:46:28.400> bigger<00:46:28.640> than<00:46:28.800> my<00:46:28.960> body

know i'm something bigger than my body

know i'm something bigger than my body
so<00:46:30.160> when<00:46:30.319> it<00:46:30.400> comes<00:46:30.640> to<00:46:30.720> my<00:46:30.960> sexual<00:46:31.359> identity<00:46:31.839> i

so when it comes to my sexual identity i

so when it comes to my sexual identity i
identify<00:46:32.640> as<00:46:32.800> my<00:46:33.040> sexual<00:46:33.920> um<00:46:34.160> my<00:46:34.319> sexual

identify as my sexual um my sexual

identify as my sexual um my sexual
meaning<00:46:35.040> it's<00:46:35.599> my<00:46:35.839> love<00:46:36.160> my<00:46:36.400> lust<00:46:36.800> my<00:46:37.040> thing

meaning it's my love my lust my thing

meaning it's my love my lust my thing
and<00:46:37.520> i'm<00:46:37.599> gonna<00:46:37.760> go<00:46:38.000> for<00:46:38.240> it<00:46:38.400> no<00:46:38.640> matter<00:46:39.040> the

and i'm gonna go for it no matter the

and i'm gonna go for it no matter the
genitalia<00:46:39.839> or<00:46:39.920> the<00:46:40.079> type<00:46:40.319> of<00:46:40.400> person<00:46:41.200> as<00:46:41.359> long

genitalia or the type of person as long

genitalia or the type of person as long
as<00:46:41.599> it<00:46:41.680> feels<00:46:41.920> right<00:46:42.160> for<00:46:42.319> me<00:46:42.480> and<00:46:42.560> it<00:46:42.640> may<00:46:42.880> seem

as it feels right for me and it may seem

as it feels right for me and it may seem
one<00:46:43.440> thing<00:46:43.680> now<00:46:44.160> but<00:46:44.319> it<00:46:44.480> could<00:46:44.640> change<00:46:45.119> any

one thing now but it could change any

one thing now but it could change any
point<00:46:45.680> in<00:46:45.839> time<00:46:46.160> it's<00:46:46.319> my<00:46:46.480> journey<00:46:46.800> and<00:46:46.960> it

point in time it's my journey and it

point in time it's my journey and it
can't<00:46:47.200> be<00:46:47.359> compared<00:46:47.680> to<00:46:47.839> anyone<00:46:48.240> else<00:46:48.800> it's<00:46:48.960> a

can't be compared to anyone else it's a

can't be compared to anyone else it's a
way<00:46:49.280> of<00:46:49.839> limiting

way of limiting

way of limiting
the<00:46:51.680> shackles<00:46:52.160> that<00:46:52.240> we<00:46:52.400> have<00:46:52.800> based<00:46:53.119> on<00:46:53.359> and

the shackles that we have based on and

the shackles that we have based on and
like<00:46:54.079> other<00:46:54.640> labels<00:46:55.040> and<00:46:55.119> identities<00:46:55.760> i've

like other labels and identities i've

like other labels and identities i've
had<00:46:56.160> a<00:46:56.240> really<00:46:56.480> hard<00:46:56.720> time<00:46:57.200> throughout<00:46:57.520> my

had a really hard time throughout my

had a really hard time throughout my
career<00:46:58.240> finding<00:46:58.560> the<00:46:58.720> right<00:46:58.960> language<00:46:59.359> to<00:46:59.520> use

career finding the right language to use

career finding the right language to use
to<00:46:59.920> describe<00:47:00.319> myself

to describe myself

to describe myself
it's<00:47:02.240> been<00:47:02.480> really<00:47:02.640> hard<00:47:02.880> because<00:47:03.040> i<00:47:03.119> have<00:47:03.200> a

it's been really hard because i have a

it's been really hard because i have a
lot<00:47:03.440> of<00:47:03.520> pressure<00:47:03.920> to<00:47:04.079> identify<00:47:04.480> as<00:47:04.640> a<00:47:04.720> lesbian

lot of pressure to identify as a lesbian

lot of pressure to identify as a lesbian
because<00:47:05.359> the<00:47:05.520> people<00:47:05.760> i<00:47:05.920> typically<00:47:06.560> date<00:47:07.280> are

because the people i typically date are

because the people i typically date are
people<00:47:07.920> who<00:47:08.160> identify<00:47:08.720> as<00:47:08.880> lesbian<00:47:09.359> or

people who identify as lesbian or

people who identify as lesbian or
bisexual

bisexual

bisexual
or<00:47:10.720> they<00:47:10.960> have<00:47:11.119> a<00:47:11.280> specific<00:47:11.680> set<00:47:11.839> of<00:47:11.920> genitalia

or they have a specific set of genitalia

or they have a specific set of genitalia
or<00:47:12.880> a<00:47:12.960> specific<00:47:13.520> identity<00:47:14.400> and<00:47:14.880> i<00:47:14.960> just<00:47:15.200> wasn't

or a specific identity and i just wasn't

or a specific identity and i just wasn't
really<00:47:15.680> born<00:47:15.920> with<00:47:16.079> the<00:47:16.240> right<00:47:16.720> language<00:47:17.200> i

really born with the right language i

really born with the right language i
think<00:47:17.920> queer<00:47:18.640> even<00:47:19.040> is<00:47:19.200> like<00:47:19.440> something<00:47:19.760> that

think queer even is like something that

think queer even is like something that
i<00:47:20.319> had<00:47:20.559> a<00:47:20.640> hard<00:47:20.800> time<00:47:21.040> identifying<00:47:21.680> as<00:47:21.920> and<00:47:22.000> i

i had a hard time identifying as and i

i had a hard time identifying as and i
just<00:47:22.319> i<00:47:22.480> really<00:47:22.720> sat<00:47:22.960> down<00:47:23.119> with<00:47:23.359> it<00:47:23.440> and<00:47:23.520> just

just i really sat down with it and just

just i really sat down with it and just
realized<00:47:24.160> like<00:47:24.640> the<00:47:24.880> current<00:47:25.119> language<00:47:25.520> we

realized like the current language we

realized like the current language we
have<00:47:25.760> in<00:47:25.920> place<00:47:26.559> cannot

have in place cannot

have in place cannot
come<00:47:27.760> close<00:47:28.079> to<00:47:28.240> defining<00:47:28.800> what<00:47:28.960> i<00:47:29.119> am<00:47:29.760> so<00:47:30.240> i

come close to defining what i am so i

come close to defining what i am so i
just<00:47:30.640> say<00:47:31.040> sexually<00:47:31.599> i'm<00:47:31.680> my<00:47:31.920> sexual<00:47:32.800> and

just say sexually i'm my sexual and

just say sexually i'm my sexual and
identity<00:47:33.520> wise<00:47:33.839> i'm<00:47:34.160> an<00:47:34.319> awareness

identity wise i'm an awareness

identity wise i'm an awareness
for<00:47:37.119> me<00:47:37.359> a<00:47:37.520> pronoun<00:47:38.000> is<00:47:38.079> just<00:47:38.240> a<00:47:38.400> sound<00:47:38.720> and

for me a pronoun is just a sound and

for me a pronoun is just a sound and
what<00:47:38.960> i'm<00:47:39.200> listening<00:47:39.520> for<00:47:39.760> in<00:47:39.839> that<00:47:40.079> sound<00:47:40.400> is

what i'm listening for in that sound is

what i'm listening for in that sound is
positivity<00:47:41.680> so<00:47:41.839> as<00:47:42.000> long<00:47:42.160> as<00:47:42.319> you<00:47:42.400> have<00:47:42.640> good

positivity so as long as you have good

positivity so as long as you have good
intentions<00:47:43.440> and<00:47:43.599> you're<00:47:43.760> just<00:47:44.079> trying<00:47:44.240> to<00:47:44.319> go

intentions and you're just trying to go

intentions and you're just trying to go
with<00:47:44.640> the<00:47:44.720> flow<00:47:45.200> i'm<00:47:45.359> good<00:47:45.520> with<00:47:45.680> it<00:47:46.079> i<00:47:46.160> don't

with the flow i'm good with it i don't

with the flow i'm good with it i don't
believe<00:47:46.720> in<00:47:46.800> using<00:47:47.200> he<00:47:47.440> or<00:47:47.599> she<00:47:47.839> i<00:47:47.920> know<00:47:48.079> that's

believe in using he or she i know that's

believe in using he or she i know that's
very<00:47:48.559> important<00:47:48.880> for<00:47:49.040> some<00:47:49.280> people<00:47:49.680> and<00:47:49.839> i

very important for some people and i

very important for some people and i
will<00:47:50.160> respect<00:47:50.559> it<00:47:50.640> if<00:47:50.800> somebody<00:47:51.119> asked<00:47:51.359> him<00:47:51.440> to

will respect it if somebody asked him to

will respect it if somebody asked him to
use<00:47:51.839> he<00:47:52.000> or<00:47:52.160> she<00:47:52.880> but<00:47:53.359> for<00:47:53.599> me

use he or she but for me

use he or she but for me
i<00:47:54.480> think<00:47:54.640> that

i think that

i think that
we've<00:47:55.680> gotten<00:47:55.920> to<00:47:56.079> a<00:47:56.160> point<00:47:56.480> where<00:47:57.119> to<00:47:57.359> be<00:47:57.599> to

we've gotten to a point where to be to

we've gotten to a point where to be to
know<00:47:57.920> what<00:47:58.160> a<00:47:58.240> he<00:47:58.400> or<00:47:58.640> she<00:47:58.960> is<00:47:59.200> is<00:47:59.280> really

know what a he or she is is really

know what a he or she is is really
irrelevant<00:48:00.640> why<00:48:00.800> do<00:48:01.040> we<00:48:01.119> need<00:48:01.359> to<00:48:01.520> know<00:48:02.000> what

irrelevant why do we need to know what

irrelevant why do we need to know what
does<00:48:02.400> a<00:48:02.559> he<00:48:02.800> mean<00:48:02.960> does<00:48:03.200> he<00:48:03.359> mean<00:48:03.599> to<00:48:03.680> have<00:48:03.760> a

does a he mean does he mean to have a

does a he mean does he mean to have a
penis<00:48:04.240> it<00:48:04.319> doesn't<00:48:04.559> mean<00:48:04.720> that<00:48:04.880> anymore<00:48:05.760> it

penis it doesn't mean that anymore it

penis it doesn't mean that anymore it
never<00:48:06.160> really<00:48:06.480> has<00:48:07.280> does<00:48:07.760> she<00:48:07.920> mean<00:48:08.079> that<00:48:08.319> they

never really has does she mean that they

never really has does she mean that they
have<00:48:08.640> a<00:48:08.720> vagina<00:48:09.200> or<00:48:09.280> a<00:48:09.359> breast<00:48:09.680> no<00:48:09.839> that<00:48:10.240> that's

have a vagina or a breast no that that's

have a vagina or a breast no that that's
not<00:48:10.559> what<00:48:10.720> that<00:48:10.960> means<00:48:11.440> anymore<00:48:11.839> and<00:48:11.920> it<00:48:12.000> never

not what that means anymore and it never

not what that means anymore and it never
really<00:48:12.480> has

really has

really has
there<00:48:13.599> you're<00:48:13.839> not<00:48:14.079> you're<00:48:14.240> not<00:48:14.400> getting<00:48:14.800> any

there you're not you're not getting any

there you're not you're not getting any
information<00:48:16.319> about<00:48:16.800> anyone<00:48:17.359> any<00:48:18.079> more<00:48:18.400> or

information about anyone any more or

information about anyone any more or
less<00:48:19.200> when<00:48:19.359> you<00:48:19.520> say<00:48:19.839> when<00:48:20.000> somebody<00:48:20.240> says<00:48:20.480> he

less when you say when somebody says he

less when you say when somebody says he
or<00:48:20.800> she<00:48:21.280> hairstyle<00:48:22.400> clothing<00:48:23.200> what<00:48:23.440> they<00:48:23.760> like

or she hairstyle clothing what they like

or she hairstyle clothing what they like
if<00:48:24.240> they're<00:48:24.400> wearing<00:48:24.720> makeup<00:48:25.040> what<00:48:25.200> they<00:48:25.359> even

if they're wearing makeup what they even

if they're wearing makeup what they even
smell<00:48:26.000> like<00:48:26.319> how<00:48:26.559> they<00:48:26.720> act<00:48:27.440> none<00:48:27.599> of<00:48:27.680> that

smell like how they act none of that

smell like how they act none of that
stuff

stuff

stuff
you<00:48:29.200> can<00:48:29.440> derive<00:48:29.839> from<00:48:30.000> like<00:48:30.240> knowing<00:48:30.480> he<00:48:30.640> or

you can derive from like knowing he or

you can derive from like knowing he or
she<00:48:30.880> so<00:48:31.040> i<00:48:31.119> just<00:48:31.280> think<00:48:31.440> it's<00:48:31.520> superfluous

she so i just think it's superfluous

she so i just think it's superfluous
information<00:48:32.640> to<00:48:32.839> say<00:48:33.760> um<00:48:34.400> and<00:48:34.559> i<00:48:34.720> i<00:48:34.960> respect<00:48:35.280> it

information to say um and i i respect it

information to say um and i i respect it
as<00:48:35.599> like<00:48:35.760> some<00:48:35.920> people<00:48:36.079> want<00:48:36.319> it<00:48:36.400> as<00:48:36.480> a<00:48:36.559> respect

as like some people want it as a respect

as like some people want it as a respect
thing<00:48:37.200> because<00:48:37.440> they<00:48:37.839> they're<00:48:38.000> like<00:48:38.240> i've

thing because they they're like i've

thing because they they're like i've
worked<00:48:38.640> hard<00:48:38.800> for<00:48:38.960> this<00:48:39.119> identity<00:48:39.920> and<00:48:40.079> i<00:48:40.240> get

worked hard for this identity and i get

worked hard for this identity and i get
that<00:48:40.880> so<00:48:41.119> i'll<00:48:41.280> respect<00:48:41.680> it<00:48:41.760> on<00:48:41.839> that<00:48:42.000> term<00:48:42.240> but

that so i'll respect it on that term but

that so i'll respect it on that term but
otherwise<00:48:42.960> i<00:48:43.280> just<00:48:43.520> think<00:48:43.680> that<00:48:43.839> it's<00:48:44.000> just

otherwise i just think that it's just

otherwise i just think that it's just
completely<00:48:45.119> superfluous<00:48:45.760> for<00:48:46.000> most<00:48:46.319> people

completely superfluous for most people

completely superfluous for most people
in<00:48:46.720> society<00:48:47.520> when<00:48:47.680> i<00:48:47.760> was<00:48:47.920> growing<00:48:48.319> up<00:48:48.480> i<00:48:48.559> was<00:48:49.119> i

in society when i was growing up i was i

in society when i was growing up i was i
was<00:48:49.440> just<00:48:49.599> kind<00:48:49.839> of

was just kind of

was just kind of
taught<00:48:51.119> that<00:48:51.280> i<00:48:51.359> was<00:48:51.520> just<00:48:51.680> an<00:48:51.839> ugly<00:48:52.160> woman<00:48:52.800> you

taught that i was just an ugly woman you

taught that i was just an ugly woman you
know<00:48:53.040> i<00:48:53.119> wasn't<00:48:53.359> going<00:48:53.440> to<00:48:53.520> be<00:48:53.599> the<00:48:53.760> girl<00:48:54.000> next

know i wasn't going to be the girl next

know i wasn't going to be the girl next
door

door

door
i'm<00:48:55.359> going<00:48:55.520> to<00:48:55.599> be<00:48:55.760> the<00:48:55.920> one<00:48:56.480> that<00:48:56.640> survives

i'm going to be the one that survives

i'm going to be the one that survives
the<00:48:57.119> apocalypse<00:48:57.680> with<00:48:57.760> a<00:48:57.839> shotgun<00:48:58.240> and<00:48:58.319> a

the apocalypse with a shotgun and a

the apocalypse with a shotgun and a
german<00:48:58.720> shepherd<00:48:59.520> and<00:48:59.760> like<00:49:00.000> motorcycle<00:49:00.720> you

german shepherd and like motorcycle you

german shepherd and like motorcycle you
know<00:49:02.319> uh<00:49:02.720> because<00:49:03.040> i<00:49:03.119> didn't<00:49:03.359> have<00:49:03.520> the

know uh because i didn't have the

know uh because i didn't have the
language<00:49:04.079> to<00:49:04.240> know<00:49:04.480> that<00:49:05.040> you<00:49:05.119> know<00:49:05.359> there's

language to know that you know there's

language to know that you know there's
no<00:49:05.760> such<00:49:06.000> thing<00:49:06.319> as<00:49:06.960> male<00:49:07.359> female<00:49:07.920> anything

no such thing as male female anything

no such thing as male female anything
that<00:49:09.200> we're<00:49:09.359> something<00:49:09.680> much<00:49:10.079> bigger<00:49:10.400> than

that we're something much bigger than

that we're something much bigger than
that<00:49:11.119> that's<00:49:11.599> what<00:49:11.760> i<00:49:11.920> grew<00:49:12.079> up<00:49:12.240> thinking

that that's what i grew up thinking

that that's what i grew up thinking
then<00:49:13.599> i<00:49:14.079> found<00:49:14.319> my<00:49:14.480> place<00:49:14.720> in<00:49:14.839> firefighting

then i found my place in firefighting

then i found my place in firefighting
and<00:49:16.000> in<00:49:16.079> firefighting<00:49:16.640> i<00:49:16.800> fire<00:49:17.040> fought<00:49:17.280> as

and in firefighting i fire fought as

and in firefighting i fire fought as
male

male

male
and<00:49:19.119> that<00:49:19.359> really<00:49:19.599> changed<00:49:20.079> my

and that really changed my

and that really changed my
perspective<00:49:22.400> on<00:49:22.559> what<00:49:22.880> male<00:49:23.359> is<00:49:24.000> and<00:49:24.160> what<00:49:24.400> i

perspective on what male is and what i

perspective on what male is and what i
am<00:49:25.119> and<00:49:25.280> how<00:49:25.440> you<00:49:25.599> can<00:49:25.680> be<00:49:25.839> perceived<00:49:26.240> as<00:49:26.319> that

am and how you can be perceived as that

am and how you can be perceived as that
thing

thing

thing
by<00:49:28.480> the<00:49:28.559> time<00:49:28.800> i<00:49:28.880> got<00:49:29.040> to<00:49:29.119> california<00:49:29.760> right

by the time i got to california right

by the time i got to california right
before<00:49:30.240> modeling<00:49:30.720> i<00:49:30.800> was<00:49:31.119> studying<00:49:31.760> uh<00:49:32.079> to<00:49:32.720> get

before modeling i was studying uh to get

before modeling i was studying uh to get
my<00:49:33.040> degree<00:49:33.359> in<00:49:33.440> genetic<00:49:33.839> engineering<00:49:34.319> with<00:49:34.559> uh

my degree in genetic engineering with uh

my degree in genetic engineering with uh
associates<00:49:35.520> in<00:49:35.599> civil<00:49:35.920> law<00:49:36.559> um<00:49:37.119> and

associates in civil law um and

associates in civil law um and
i<00:49:38.319> realized<00:49:38.880> that<00:49:39.119> like<00:49:39.359> i<00:49:39.520> didn't<00:49:39.680> have<00:49:39.920> time

i realized that like i didn't have time

i realized that like i didn't have time
it<00:49:40.240> became<00:49:40.559> a<00:49:40.640> gender<00:49:40.960> capitalist<00:49:41.839> at<00:49:42.000> that

it became a gender capitalist at that

it became a gender capitalist at that
point<00:49:42.559> where<00:49:42.800> i<00:49:42.880> just<00:49:43.040> let<00:49:43.200> other<00:49:43.359> people<00:49:43.680> be

point where i just let other people be

point where i just let other people be
responsible<00:49:44.480> for<00:49:44.640> their<00:49:44.720> perceptions<00:49:45.280> of<00:49:45.440> me

responsible for their perceptions of me

responsible for their perceptions of me
and<00:49:45.839> i<00:49:45.920> would<00:49:46.079> correct<00:49:46.480> them<00:49:46.720> in<00:49:46.800> one

and i would correct them in one

and i would correct them in one
direction<00:49:47.440> or<00:49:47.520> the<00:49:47.680> other<00:49:48.160> based<00:49:48.400> on<00:49:48.559> what<00:49:48.720> i

direction or the other based on what i

direction or the other based on what i
thought<00:49:49.040> was<00:49:49.200> more<00:49:49.359> advantageous<00:49:50.640> it<00:49:50.800> was<00:49:50.960> a

thought was more advantageous it was a

thought was more advantageous it was a
little<00:49:51.200> bit<00:49:51.359> cheap<00:49:51.599> the<00:49:51.760> system<00:49:52.079> but<00:49:52.240> hey<00:49:52.400> they

little bit cheap the system but hey they

little bit cheap the system but hey they
were<00:49:52.720> cheating<00:49:53.040> me<00:49:53.359> by<00:49:53.599> putting<00:49:53.839> me<00:49:54.000> down<00:49:54.559> so<00:49:54.720> i

were cheating me by putting me down so i

were cheating me by putting me down so i
felt<00:49:55.200> very<00:49:55.359> eye<00:49:55.599> for<00:49:55.760> eye

felt very eye for eye

felt very eye for eye
when<00:49:56.880> i<00:49:57.040> became<00:49:57.280> a<00:49:57.440> model

when i became a model

when i became a model
um

um

um
that's<00:50:00.400> when<00:50:00.640> things<00:50:01.359> changed<00:50:02.079> my<00:50:02.240> whole<00:50:02.400> life

that's when things changed my whole life

that's when things changed my whole life
had<00:50:02.800> been<00:50:02.960> based<00:50:03.200> around<00:50:03.440> doing<00:50:03.680> manual<00:50:04.079> labor

had been based around doing manual labor

had been based around doing manual labor
and<00:50:04.480> i<00:50:04.640> thought<00:50:04.880> that<00:50:05.040> was<00:50:05.200> the<00:50:05.280> only<00:50:05.440> thing<00:50:05.599> i

and i thought that was the only thing i

and i thought that was the only thing i
was<00:50:05.760> ever<00:50:06.000> going<00:50:06.079> to<00:50:06.160> be<00:50:06.240> good<00:50:06.480> for

was ever going to be good for

was ever going to be good for
talking

talking

talking
i'm<00:50:08.319> moving<00:50:08.640> some<00:50:08.880> dirt<00:50:09.280> you<00:50:09.359> know

i'm moving some dirt you know

i'm moving some dirt you know
i<00:50:11.119> never<00:50:11.760> i<00:50:11.920> never<00:50:12.240> thought<00:50:12.559> of<00:50:12.640> my<00:50:12.880> body<00:50:13.200> as

i never i never thought of my body as

i never i never thought of my body as
being<00:50:14.240> something<00:50:14.800> really<00:50:15.040> to<00:50:15.200> be<00:50:15.359> celebrated

being something really to be celebrated

being something really to be celebrated
i<00:50:16.240> just<00:50:16.480> kind<00:50:16.720> of<00:50:16.880> use<00:50:17.119> it<00:50:17.280> in<00:50:17.359> a<00:50:17.520> practical<00:50:18.000> way

i just kind of use it in a practical way

i just kind of use it in a practical way
there<00:50:18.800> are<00:50:18.880> definitely<00:50:19.200> different<00:50:19.440> pressures

there are definitely different pressures

there are definitely different pressures
that<00:50:20.480> i<00:50:21.200> face

that i face

that i face
based<00:50:22.400> on<00:50:22.559> if<00:50:22.720> people<00:50:23.119> think<00:50:23.359> that<00:50:23.599> i'm<00:50:24.000> trying

based on if people think that i'm trying

based on if people think that i'm trying
to<00:50:25.040> be<00:50:25.359> what<00:50:25.520> we<00:50:25.680> can<00:50:25.760> sort<00:50:25.920> of<00:50:26.000> be<00:50:26.160> male<00:50:26.480> or

to be what we can sort of be male or

to be what we can sort of be male or
consider<00:50:27.359> to<00:50:27.520> be<00:50:27.839> female

consider to be female

consider to be female
presentation<00:50:29.920> wise<00:50:30.559> a<00:50:30.640> lot<00:50:30.800> of<00:50:30.880> people<00:50:31.119> see<00:50:31.280> it

presentation wise a lot of people see it

presentation wise a lot of people see it
as<00:50:31.520> i'm<00:50:31.680> modeling<00:50:32.160> menswear<00:50:32.720> and<00:50:32.800> women's

as i'm modeling menswear and women's

as i'm modeling menswear and women's
wear<00:50:33.920> but<00:50:34.079> for<00:50:34.240> me<00:50:34.480> i<00:50:34.640> feel<00:50:34.880> like<00:50:35.119> it's<00:50:35.280> just

wear but for me i feel like it's just

wear but for me i feel like it's just
cloth<00:50:36.000> and<00:50:36.160> it<00:50:36.240> has<00:50:36.559> a<00:50:36.640> certain<00:50:37.040> architecture

cloth and it has a certain architecture

cloth and it has a certain architecture
to<00:50:37.920> it<00:50:38.240> but<00:50:38.640> that's<00:50:38.960> not<00:50:39.200> specific<00:50:39.680> to<00:50:39.920> an

to it but that's not specific to an

to it but that's not specific to an
identity<00:50:40.800> or<00:50:41.040> specific<00:50:41.680> to

identity or specific to

identity or specific to
who<00:50:42.720> i<00:50:42.960> am<00:50:43.359> new<00:50:43.520> york<00:50:43.760> city<00:50:44.079> has<00:50:44.319> a<00:50:44.400> lot<00:50:44.559> of

who i am new york city has a lot of

who i am new york city has a lot of
different<00:50:44.960> cultures<00:50:45.359> which<00:50:45.520> means<00:50:45.760> that<00:50:45.839> you

different cultures which means that you

different cultures which means that you
have<00:50:46.240> a<00:50:46.319> lot<00:50:46.480> of<00:50:46.640> freedoms

have a lot of freedoms

have a lot of freedoms
and<00:50:48.160> you<00:50:48.400> definitely<00:50:48.800> can<00:50:48.960> feel<00:50:49.280> a<00:50:49.359> lot<00:50:50.000> of

and you definitely can feel a lot of

and you definitely can feel a lot of
safety<00:50:51.359> in<00:50:51.520> certain<00:50:51.920> spaces<00:50:52.400> because<00:50:53.040> that

safety in certain spaces because that

safety in certain spaces because that
culture<00:50:53.599> has<00:50:53.680> been<00:50:53.839> allowed<00:50:54.160> to<00:50:54.319> thrive

culture has been allowed to thrive

culture has been allowed to thrive
because<00:50:54.960> we<00:50:55.359> do<00:50:55.599> allow<00:50:55.920> for<00:50:56.079> diversity<00:50:56.800> but

because we do allow for diversity but

because we do allow for diversity but
with<00:50:57.200> diversity<00:50:57.680> means<00:50:57.920> you<00:50:58.079> also<00:50:58.400> get<00:50:58.720> people

with diversity means you also get people

with diversity means you also get people
who<00:50:59.200> are<00:50:59.359> extremely

who are extremely

who are extremely
not<00:51:01.040> comfortable<00:51:01.520> with<00:51:01.839> your<00:51:02.400> particular

not comfortable with your particular

not comfortable with your particular
identity<00:51:03.359> so<00:51:03.599> there<00:51:03.760> are<00:51:03.920> going<00:51:04.000> to<00:51:04.079> be

identity so there are going to be

identity so there are going to be
certain<00:51:04.480> parts<00:51:04.720> of<00:51:04.800> the<00:51:04.880> city<00:51:05.119> that<00:51:05.280> you<00:51:05.359> go<00:51:05.599> to

certain parts of the city that you go to

certain parts of the city that you go to
that<00:51:06.559> you<00:51:06.720> know<00:51:07.280> these<00:51:07.520> people<00:51:07.920> will<00:51:08.240> kind<00:51:08.400> of

that you know these people will kind of

that you know these people will kind of
look<00:51:08.640> down<00:51:08.800> their<00:51:08.960> nose<00:51:09.200> at<00:51:09.280> you<00:51:09.440> or<00:51:09.520> they<00:51:09.680> will

look down their nose at you or they will

look down their nose at you or they will
feel<00:51:10.079> uncomfortable<00:51:10.960> but<00:51:11.200> the<00:51:11.280> great<00:51:11.440> thing

feel uncomfortable but the great thing

feel uncomfortable but the great thing
about<00:51:11.839> new<00:51:12.000> york<00:51:12.240> is<00:51:12.400> that<00:51:12.720> because<00:51:13.119> there's

about new york is that because there's

about new york is that because there's
so<00:51:13.839> much<00:51:14.160> cultural<00:51:14.640> confrontation<00:51:15.520> we've

so much cultural confrontation we've

so much cultural confrontation we've
learned<00:51:16.000> to<00:51:16.079> live<00:51:16.240> with<00:51:16.400> each<00:51:16.640> other<00:51:16.880> and

learned to live with each other and

learned to live with each other and
we've<00:51:17.760> learned<00:51:18.000> to<00:51:18.319> be<00:51:18.480> okay<00:51:18.880> with<00:51:19.440> being

we've learned to be okay with being

we've learned to be okay with being
confronted<00:51:20.319> and<00:51:20.480> be<00:51:20.720> okay<00:51:21.040> with<00:51:21.200> having<00:51:21.520> a

confronted and be okay with having a

confronted and be okay with having a
dialogue<00:51:22.079> and<00:51:22.160> sometimes<00:51:22.559> it<00:51:22.640> can<00:51:22.800> get

dialogue and sometimes it can get

dialogue and sometimes it can get
volatile<00:51:23.920> or<00:51:24.079> violent

volatile or violent

volatile or violent
but

but

but
for<00:51:27.599> the<00:51:27.680> most<00:51:28.000> part

for the most part

for the most part
i<00:51:29.119> mean

i mean

i mean
just<00:51:30.079> being<00:51:30.319> able<00:51:30.480> to<00:51:30.559> have<00:51:30.800> that<00:51:31.040> openness<00:51:31.920> is

just being able to have that openness is

just being able to have that openness is
is<00:51:32.480> like<00:51:32.720> the<00:51:32.880> ultimate<00:51:33.200> freedom<00:51:33.680> i<00:51:33.839> think

is like the ultimate freedom i think

is like the ultimate freedom i think
society<00:51:34.720> expects<00:51:36.079> as<00:51:36.240> a<00:51:36.319> gay<00:51:36.559> man<00:51:36.880> but<00:51:37.040> if<00:51:37.200> i'm

society expects as a gay man but if i'm

society expects as a gay man but if i'm
being<00:51:37.599> honest<00:51:38.079> as<00:51:38.240> a<00:51:38.319> human<00:51:38.720> being

being honest as a human being

being honest as a human being
i<00:51:40.160> think<00:51:40.319> that<00:51:40.559> our

i think that our

i think that our
complexities<00:51:42.559> are<00:51:42.720> a<00:51:42.800> little<00:51:42.960> bit<00:51:43.119> too

complexities are a little bit too

complexities are a little bit too
intricate<00:51:44.000> to

intricate to

intricate to
fit<00:51:45.119> within<00:51:45.440> the<00:51:45.520> confines<00:51:46.079> of<00:51:46.160> a<00:51:46.319> gender

fit within the confines of a gender

fit within the confines of a gender
binary<00:51:47.680> so<00:51:48.079> i

binary so i

binary so i
identify<00:51:49.920> myself<00:51:50.319> as<00:51:50.559> just<00:51:50.960> an<00:51:51.119> energetic

identify myself as just an energetic

identify myself as just an energetic
being<00:51:52.319> as<00:51:52.480> a<00:51:52.559> human<00:51:52.960> being

being as a human being

being as a human being
i<00:51:54.240> mean<00:51:54.559> sexually<00:51:55.040> i'm<00:51:55.200> attracted<00:51:55.599> to<00:51:55.760> men

i mean sexually i'm attracted to men

i mean sexually i'm attracted to men
that's<00:51:57.040> obvious

that's obvious

that's obvious
but<00:51:58.319> i<00:51:58.400> think

but i think

but i think
at<00:51:59.839> the<00:51:59.920> end<00:52:00.079> of<00:52:00.240> the<00:52:00.319> day

at the end of the day

at the end of the day
it's<00:52:01.599> all<00:52:01.760> friction

it's all friction

it's all friction
i<00:52:02.800> think<00:52:02.960> that<00:52:03.119> i<00:52:03.280> could<00:52:03.680> have<00:52:03.920> a<00:52:04.000> sexual

i think that i could have a sexual

i think that i could have a sexual
relationship<00:52:04.880> with<00:52:05.040> a<00:52:05.119> woman

relationship with a woman

relationship with a woman
but<00:52:06.559> it's<00:52:06.720> obvious<00:52:07.200> to<00:52:07.359> me

but it's obvious to me

but it's obvious to me
that<00:52:09.920> i<00:52:10.079> have<00:52:10.240> a<00:52:10.319> preference<00:52:10.880> that

that i have a preference that

that i have a preference that
is<00:52:12.160> more<00:52:12.880> focused<00:52:13.280> on<00:52:13.359> men

well right now i'm

well right now i'm
navigating<00:52:18.160> the<00:52:18.400> entertainment<00:52:19.040> industry<00:52:20.000> uh

navigating the entertainment industry uh

navigating the entertainment industry uh
and<00:52:20.640> i'm<00:52:20.800> most<00:52:21.040> well<00:52:21.280> known<00:52:21.680> as<00:52:22.079> a<00:52:22.640> reality<00:52:23.119> tv

and i'm most well known as a reality tv

and i'm most well known as a reality tv
personality<00:52:24.319> who<00:52:24.480> was<00:52:24.720> on<00:52:24.880> america's<00:52:25.359> next

personality who was on america's next

personality who was on america's next
top<00:52:25.839> model<00:52:26.720> and<00:52:27.200> gender<00:52:27.680> does<00:52:28.000> have<00:52:28.160> an<00:52:28.319> impact

top model and gender does have an impact

top model and gender does have an impact
on<00:52:28.960> my

on my

on my
placement<00:52:30.960> in<00:52:31.119> that<00:52:31.359> world<00:52:32.160> while<00:52:32.400> i<00:52:32.480> was<00:52:32.559> on

placement in that world while i was on

placement in that world while i was on
the<00:52:32.800> show<00:52:33.040> i<00:52:33.119> was<00:52:33.280> critiqued<00:52:33.680> a<00:52:33.760> lot<00:52:34.160> for

the show i was critiqued a lot for

the show i was critiqued a lot for
for<00:52:36.240> things<00:52:36.480> concerning<00:52:36.960> my<00:52:37.119> gender<00:52:37.440> and<00:52:37.520> my

for things concerning my gender and my

for things concerning my gender and my
sexuality<00:52:38.640> i<00:52:38.720> was<00:52:38.880> told<00:52:39.119> that<00:52:39.200> if<00:52:39.359> i<00:52:39.839> go<00:52:40.000> into

sexuality i was told that if i go into

sexuality i was told that if i go into
model<00:52:40.640> casting<00:52:41.040> stressing<00:52:41.520> the<00:52:41.680> way<00:52:41.839> that<00:52:42.000> i

model casting stressing the way that i

model casting stressing the way that i
do<00:52:42.240> that<00:52:42.400> i<00:52:42.480> would<00:52:42.640> be<00:52:42.800> mistaken<00:52:43.440> as<00:52:44.000> the

do that i would be mistaken as the

do that i would be mistaken as the
makeup<00:52:44.559> artist<00:52:45.119> so<00:52:45.359> it<00:52:45.520> does<00:52:45.839> have<00:52:46.000> an<00:52:46.160> impact

makeup artist so it does have an impact

makeup artist so it does have an impact
on<00:52:46.960> my<00:52:47.119> life<00:52:47.280> and<00:52:47.359> my<00:52:47.520> career

on my life and my career

on my life and my career
i<00:52:49.520> think<00:52:49.760> that

i think that

i think that
models<00:52:51.359> in<00:52:51.599> general

models in general

models in general
successful<00:52:53.680> models<00:52:54.400> don't<00:52:54.640> really<00:52:54.880> have<00:52:55.040> to

successful models don't really have to

successful models don't really have to
worry<00:52:55.680> so<00:52:55.839> much<00:52:56.319> about<00:52:56.640> things<00:52:57.200> like

worry so much about things like

worry so much about things like
sexuality<00:52:58.800> and<00:52:59.200> gender<00:52:59.680> because

sexuality and gender because

sexuality and gender because
if<00:53:01.119> you<00:53:01.440> are<00:53:01.599> a<00:53:02.240> working<00:53:02.640> model<00:53:02.960> in<00:53:03.040> the

if you are a working model in the

if you are a working model in the
industry<00:53:03.599> you're<00:53:03.760> able<00:53:04.000> to<00:53:04.079> give<00:53:04.319> off

industry you're able to give off

industry you're able to give off
that<00:53:05.520> cis<00:53:06.000> vibe<00:53:06.319> but<00:53:06.480> that<00:53:06.720> sells

that cis vibe but that sells

that cis vibe but that sells
and

and

and
that<00:53:09.599> isn't<00:53:09.839> me

that isn't me

that isn't me
i<00:53:11.200> grew<00:53:11.520> up<00:53:12.079> in

i grew up in

i grew up in
a<00:53:13.280> family<00:53:13.680> of<00:53:14.079> six<00:53:14.720> i<00:53:14.960> have<00:53:15.680> uh<00:53:15.920> three<00:53:16.240> brothers

a family of six i have uh three brothers

a family of six i have uh three brothers
who<00:53:16.880> are<00:53:17.040> all

who are all

who are all
very<00:53:18.640> very

very very

very very
in<00:53:20.240> touch<00:53:20.480> with<00:53:20.640> their<00:53:20.880> manhood<00:53:21.440> let's<00:53:21.680> say

in touch with their manhood let's say

in touch with their manhood let's say
and<00:53:23.760> i<00:53:24.079> um<00:53:24.640> i<00:53:24.800> was<00:53:25.040> the<00:53:25.119> one<00:53:25.280> who<00:53:25.520> was<00:53:25.599> a<00:53:25.680> little

and i um i was the one who was a little

and i um i was the one who was a little
bit<00:53:26.000> more<00:53:26.160> flamboyant<00:53:27.280> a<00:53:27.359> little<00:53:27.520> bit<00:53:27.680> more

bit more flamboyant a little bit more

bit more flamboyant a little bit more
like

like

like
feminine<00:53:30.720> as<00:53:30.880> some<00:53:31.040> would<00:53:31.280> say<00:53:32.000> uh

feminine as some would say uh

feminine as some would say uh
i've<00:53:33.280> always

i've always

i've always
just<00:53:35.200> had<00:53:35.359> a<00:53:35.520> natural<00:53:35.920> gravitation<00:53:36.720> towards

just had a natural gravitation towards

just had a natural gravitation towards
things<00:53:37.599> that<00:53:37.920> mainstream<00:53:38.480> society<00:53:39.119> pegs<00:53:39.440> as

things that mainstream society pegs as

things that mainstream society pegs as
feminine<00:53:40.240> it's<00:53:40.559> just<00:53:41.040> the<00:53:41.200> way<00:53:41.359> it<00:53:41.520> is<00:53:41.920> and

feminine it's just the way it is and

feminine it's just the way it is and
it<00:53:44.319> is<00:53:44.559> sort<00:53:44.720> of<00:53:44.880> a<00:53:45.040> shame<00:53:45.359> that<00:53:45.520> that<00:53:45.760> has<00:53:45.920> been

it is sort of a shame that that has been

it is sort of a shame that that has been
a<00:53:46.160> struggle<00:53:46.559> in<00:53:46.640> my<00:53:46.800> life<00:53:47.119> because

a struggle in my life because

a struggle in my life because
all<00:53:48.960> i've<00:53:49.119> been<00:53:49.359> doing<00:53:49.680> is<00:53:49.839> being<00:53:50.240> genuine<00:53:50.800> all

all i've been doing is being genuine all

all i've been doing is being genuine all
the<00:53:51.040> way<00:53:51.200> through

the way through

the way through
and<00:53:52.640> that<00:53:52.880> story<00:53:53.359> carried

and that story carried

and that story carried
over<00:53:55.040> to<00:53:55.200> my<00:53:55.359> experience<00:53:56.160> on<00:53:56.319> top<00:53:56.640> model<00:53:57.440> only

over to my experience on top model only

over to my experience on top model only
this<00:53:57.920> time<00:53:58.160> it<00:53:58.240> was<00:53:58.480> for<00:53:58.640> the<00:53:58.720> world<00:53:58.960> to<00:53:59.119> see

this time it was for the world to see

this time it was for the world to see
you<00:53:59.680> know

you know

you know
um

um

um
now<00:54:02.160> i<00:54:02.800> i've<00:54:03.280> sort<00:54:03.520> of<00:54:03.599> been

now i i've sort of been

now i i've sort of been
forced<00:54:04.800> into<00:54:05.040> that<00:54:05.200> role<00:54:05.440> of<00:54:05.520> like

forced into that role of like

forced into that role of like
representative<00:54:06.480> in<00:54:06.559> a<00:54:06.640> sense<00:54:06.960> i<00:54:07.280> definitely

representative in a sense i definitely

representative in a sense i definitely
was<00:54:07.920> on<00:54:08.079> the<00:54:08.240> show<00:54:08.480> i<00:54:08.559> was<00:54:08.800> the<00:54:09.040> only<00:54:09.359> out<00:54:09.599> gay

was on the show i was the only out gay

was on the show i was the only out gay
male<00:54:10.559> during<00:54:10.800> my<00:54:10.960> season<00:54:11.280> competing<00:54:12.160> and<00:54:12.319> um

male during my season competing and um

male during my season competing and um
i<00:54:13.760> never<00:54:14.079> wanted<00:54:14.400> that<00:54:14.559> to<00:54:14.800> be

i never wanted that to be

i never wanted that to be
something<00:54:15.839> that<00:54:16.000> defined<00:54:16.400> me<00:54:16.880> i<00:54:17.040> never<00:54:17.359> wanted

something that defined me i never wanted

something that defined me i never wanted
to<00:54:17.839> go<00:54:18.000> into<00:54:18.400> socio-political<00:54:19.280> activism<00:54:19.839> i

to go into socio-political activism i

to go into socio-political activism i
never<00:54:20.160> wanted<00:54:20.400> to<00:54:20.480> be<00:54:20.640> a<00:54:20.720> voice<00:54:20.960> for<00:54:21.119> this

never wanted to be a voice for this

never wanted to be a voice for this
cause<00:54:21.760> it<00:54:21.920> just<00:54:22.079> kind<00:54:22.319> of

cause it just kind of

cause it just kind of
came

came

came
upon<00:54:24.960> me<00:54:25.520> and<00:54:25.920> i<00:54:26.480> welcome<00:54:26.880> it<00:54:27.040> and<00:54:27.119> i<00:54:27.280> embrace

upon me and i welcome it and i embrace

upon me and i welcome it and i embrace
it<00:54:27.839> because

it because

it because
through

through

through
experiencing<00:54:30.800> all<00:54:30.960> of<00:54:31.040> this<00:54:31.200> i<00:54:31.359> realize<00:54:31.599> how

experiencing all of this i realize how

experiencing all of this i realize how
important<00:54:32.079> it<00:54:32.240> is

i am not from new york city originally i

i am not from new york city originally i
am<00:54:38.400> from<00:54:38.720> philadelphia<00:54:39.440> pa<00:54:40.160> i<00:54:40.799> am<00:54:41.280> sort<00:54:41.520> of

am from philadelphia pa i am sort of

am from philadelphia pa i am sort of
living<00:54:42.240> between<00:54:42.720> london<00:54:43.200> and<00:54:43.359> new<00:54:43.520> york<00:54:43.760> at

living between london and new york at

living between london and new york at
the<00:54:43.920> moment<00:54:44.640> and<00:54:45.359> being<00:54:45.839> in

the moment and being in

the moment and being in
these<00:54:47.440> two<00:54:47.839> cultural<00:54:48.400> meccas<00:54:48.880> has<00:54:49.599> totally

these two cultural meccas has totally

these two cultural meccas has totally
improved

improved

improved
my<00:54:51.599> quality<00:54:52.000> of<00:54:52.160> living<00:54:52.799> i<00:54:53.520> just<00:54:54.079> feel<00:54:54.400> so<00:54:54.640> free

my quality of living i just feel so free

my quality of living i just feel so free
to<00:54:55.119> express<00:54:55.440> myself<00:54:56.160> openly<00:54:57.200> because<00:54:58.079> culture

to express myself openly because culture

to express myself openly because culture
is<00:54:59.040> around<00:54:59.280> me<00:54:59.440> everywhere<00:54:59.760> i<00:54:59.920> look

is around me everywhere i look

is around me everywhere i look
america's<00:55:01.760> next<00:55:02.000> top<00:55:02.160> model<00:55:02.559> actually<00:55:02.880> airs

america's next top model actually airs

america's next top model actually airs
in<00:55:03.200> 186<00:55:04.079> countries<00:55:04.640> and<00:55:04.960> i've<00:55:05.200> had<00:55:05.920> the

in 186 countries and i've had the

in 186 countries and i've had the
extraordinary<00:55:06.799> opportunity<00:55:07.280> to<00:55:07.440> get<00:55:07.599> to<00:55:07.760> talk

extraordinary opportunity to get to talk

extraordinary opportunity to get to talk
to<00:55:08.160> kids<00:55:08.400> from<00:55:08.640> all<00:55:08.880> over<00:55:09.040> the<00:55:09.119> world<00:55:09.599> fans<00:55:09.920> of

to kids from all over the world fans of

to kids from all over the world fans of
top<00:55:10.319> model<00:55:10.640> who<00:55:10.880> have<00:55:10.960> reached<00:55:11.280> out<00:55:11.359> to<00:55:11.520> me<00:55:12.000> who

top model who have reached out to me who

top model who have reached out to me who
have<00:55:12.319> been<00:55:12.480> impacted<00:55:12.880> by<00:55:13.040> my<00:55:13.280> story

have been impacted by my story

have been impacted by my story
they<00:55:14.640> tell<00:55:14.880> me<00:55:15.040> about<00:55:15.760> their<00:55:16.000> own<00:55:16.160> personal

they tell me about their own personal

they tell me about their own personal
struggles<00:55:17.119> that<00:55:17.280> they're<00:55:17.599> dealing<00:55:17.839> with

struggles that they're dealing with

struggles that they're dealing with
concerning<00:55:18.480> their<00:55:18.640> sexuality<00:55:19.280> and<00:55:19.359> a<00:55:19.440> lot<00:55:19.599> of

concerning their sexuality and a lot of

concerning their sexuality and a lot of
them<00:55:19.839> come<00:55:20.000> from<00:55:20.240> places<00:55:20.640> where

them come from places where

them come from places where
self-expression<00:55:22.400> isn't<00:55:22.640> really<00:55:22.880> celebrated

self-expression isn't really celebrated

self-expression isn't really celebrated
i

i

i
remember

remember

remember
distinctly

distinctly

distinctly
a<00:55:28.960> boy<00:55:29.359> from<00:55:29.599> russia<00:55:30.079> who<00:55:30.319> was<00:55:30.799> private

a boy from russia who was private

a boy from russia who was private
twitter<00:55:31.599> messaging<00:55:32.079> me<00:55:32.319> from<00:55:32.640> a<00:55:32.720> public

twitter messaging me from a public

twitter messaging me from a public
library<00:55:34.240> and<00:55:34.400> he<00:55:34.559> was<00:55:34.720> telling<00:55:34.960> me<00:55:35.119> that<00:55:35.359> he

library and he was telling me that he

library and he was telling me that he
was

was

was
considering<00:55:37.200> killing<00:55:37.520> himself

considering killing himself

considering killing himself
because<00:55:39.119> his<00:55:39.359> mother

because his mother

because his mother
didn't<00:55:41.440> accept<00:55:41.760> his<00:55:41.920> lifestyle<00:55:42.960> he<00:55:43.119> saw<00:55:43.359> me<00:55:43.520> on

didn't accept his lifestyle he saw me on

didn't accept his lifestyle he saw me on
the<00:55:43.760> show

the show

the show
and<00:55:45.040> was<00:55:45.280> inspired<00:55:45.680> by<00:55:45.839> my<00:55:46.000> story<00:55:46.400> and<00:55:46.559> wanted

and was inspired by my story and wanted

and was inspired by my story and wanted
advice

advice

advice
i

i

i
never<00:55:50.400> expected<00:55:50.720> to<00:55:50.880> be<00:55:50.960> in<00:55:51.119> a<00:55:51.200> position<00:55:51.599> like

never expected to be in a position like

never expected to be in a position like
that<00:55:51.920> and<00:55:52.079> i

that and i

that and i
i<00:55:53.359> don't<00:55:53.520> know<00:55:53.760> i

i don't know i

i don't know i
i<00:55:54.799> referred<00:55:55.200> him<00:55:55.440> to

i referred him to

i referred him to
um

um

um
it<00:55:58.079> was<00:55:58.160> like<00:55:58.400> a

it was like a

it was like a
youth<00:55:59.440> center

youth center

youth center
in<00:56:00.640> russia<00:56:01.040> and<00:56:01.119> we<00:56:01.280> still<00:56:01.520> talk<00:56:01.920> so<00:56:02.079> i<00:56:02.160> know

in russia and we still talk so i know

in russia and we still talk so i know
that<00:56:02.400> he's<00:56:02.640> okay<00:56:03.280> but<00:56:03.760> you<00:56:03.920> know<00:56:04.079> this<00:56:04.240> is<00:56:04.559> the

that he's okay but you know this is the

that he's okay but you know this is the
type<00:56:04.880> of<00:56:04.960> thing<00:56:05.119> that<00:56:05.200> you<00:56:05.280> don't<00:56:05.440> really<00:56:05.680> ask

type of thing that you don't really ask

type of thing that you don't really ask
for<00:56:06.880> and

for and

for and
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
it's<00:56:09.280> like

it's like

it's like
given<00:56:10.319> my<00:56:10.480> life<00:56:10.720> so<00:56:10.880> much<00:56:11.200> purpose<00:56:12.000> in<00:56:12.160> a<00:56:12.240> way

given my life so much purpose in a way

given my life so much purpose in a way
and<00:56:12.559> that's<00:56:12.720> why<00:56:13.119> i<00:56:13.280> want<00:56:13.520> to<00:56:13.760> like

and that's why i want to like

and that's why i want to like
do<00:56:14.880> things<00:56:15.040> like<00:56:15.200> this<00:56:15.440> and<00:56:15.680> you<00:56:15.839> know

do things like this and you know

do things like this and you know
really<00:56:16.960> uh

really uh

really uh
find<00:56:18.079> my<00:56:18.240> place<00:56:18.480> in<00:56:18.559> my<00:56:18.720> community<00:56:19.200> and<00:56:19.280> find

find my place in my community and find

find my place in my community and find
my<00:56:19.599> tribe<00:56:20.000> and<00:56:20.480> keep<00:56:20.720> on<00:56:21.280> spreading<00:56:21.760> the<00:56:21.920> good

my tribe and keep on spreading the good

my tribe and keep on spreading the good
word

word

word
that<00:56:23.280> it's<00:56:23.440> okay<00:56:23.680> to<00:56:23.839> be<00:56:24.000> yourself

that it's okay to be yourself

that it's okay to be yourself
i<00:56:25.200> just<00:56:25.359> want<00:56:25.520> to<00:56:25.680> say<00:56:25.920> to<00:56:26.160> any<00:56:26.319> kids<00:56:26.640> out<00:56:26.720> there

i just want to say to any kids out there

i just want to say to any kids out there
who<00:56:27.040> are<00:56:27.280> struggling

who are struggling

who are struggling
to<00:56:28.559> find<00:56:28.799> themselves<00:56:29.359> and<00:56:29.440> to<00:56:29.599> accept<00:56:30.079> and

to find themselves and to accept and

to find themselves and to accept and
embrace<00:56:31.040> who<00:56:31.200> they<00:56:31.440> truly<00:56:31.839> are<00:56:32.079> that<00:56:32.640> if

embrace who they truly are that if

embrace who they truly are that if
there's<00:56:32.960> a<00:56:33.119> certain<00:56:33.520> facet<00:56:33.920> of<00:56:34.000> your<00:56:34.160> being

there's a certain facet of your being

there's a certain facet of your being
that<00:56:34.480> you<00:56:34.640> feel<00:56:34.880> isn't<00:56:35.119> being<00:56:35.280> expressed<00:56:35.680> to

that you feel isn't being expressed to

that you feel isn't being expressed to
its<00:56:35.920> fullest<00:56:36.640> then<00:56:36.880> my<00:56:37.040> dear<00:56:37.359> you<00:56:37.520> are<00:56:37.680> missing

its fullest then my dear you are missing

its fullest then my dear you are missing
out<00:56:38.240> on<00:56:38.480> life<00:56:38.880> and<00:56:39.359> you<00:56:39.520> should<00:56:39.680> just

out on life and you should just

out on life and you should just
go<00:56:41.280> forth<00:56:42.000> with<00:56:42.240> reckless<00:56:42.720> abandon<00:56:43.200> and

go forth with reckless abandon and

go forth with reckless abandon and
experience<00:56:44.319> it<00:56:44.559> while<00:56:44.799> you<00:56:44.960> can<00:56:45.200> because<00:56:45.359> we

experience it while you can because we

experience it while you can because we
get<00:56:45.599> a<00:56:45.680> very<00:56:45.839> short<00:56:46.160> time<00:56:46.400> to<00:56:46.559> inhabit<00:56:46.880> this

get a very short time to inhabit this

get a very short time to inhabit this
earth

earth

earth
don't<00:56:48.240> be<00:56:48.400> afraid<00:56:48.720> of<00:56:48.799> what<00:56:49.040> anybody<00:56:49.440> has<00:56:50.079> to

don't be afraid of what anybody has to

don't be afraid of what anybody has to
say<00:56:50.480> about<00:56:50.720> it<00:56:50.880> just<00:56:51.119> be<00:56:51.280> yourself

you've had to choose like one word or

you've had to choose like one word or
identity<00:56:56.960> i<00:56:57.040> would<00:56:57.200> say<00:56:57.359> i<00:56:57.440> identify<00:56:57.760> as<00:56:57.839> an

identity i would say i identify as an

identity i would say i identify as an
entrepreneur<00:56:59.040> hi<00:56:59.280> there<00:56:59.760> i'm<00:56:59.920> mark<00:57:00.160> fisher

entrepreneur hi there i'm mark fisher

entrepreneur hi there i'm mark fisher
from<00:57:00.559> mark<00:57:00.799> fisher<00:57:01.119> fitness<00:57:01.680> and<00:57:01.839> today<00:57:02.400> i'd

from mark fisher fitness and today i'd

from mark fisher fitness and today i'd
like<00:57:02.799> to<00:57:02.880> tell<00:57:03.200> you<00:57:03.440> about<00:57:03.680> the<00:57:03.839> seven<00:57:04.079> habits

like to tell you about the seven habits

like to tell you about the seven habits
highly<00:57:04.960> sexy

highly sexy

highly sexy
our<00:57:06.079> fisher<00:57:06.400> fitness<00:57:06.880> is

our fisher fitness is

our fisher fitness is
an<00:57:08.079> eccentric<00:57:08.799> and<00:57:09.040> unconventional<00:57:09.680> gym<00:57:09.920> in

an eccentric and unconventional gym in

an eccentric and unconventional gym in
midtown<00:57:10.839> manhattan<00:57:11.119> we're<00:57:11.200> gonna<00:57:11.359> begin

midtown manhattan we're gonna begin

midtown manhattan we're gonna begin
today's<00:57:12.000> workout<00:57:12.400> with<00:57:12.559> a<00:57:12.640> warm-up<00:57:13.200> improv

today's workout with a warm-up improv

today's workout with a warm-up improv
dance<00:57:14.160> party<00:57:14.480> so<00:57:14.640> we<00:57:14.720> call<00:57:14.960> our<00:57:15.040> clients

dance party so we call our clients

dance party so we call our clients
ninjas<00:57:16.000> and<00:57:16.160> our<00:57:16.240> mascot<00:57:16.799> is<00:57:16.880> the<00:57:17.040> unicorn<00:57:17.839> and

ninjas and our mascot is the unicorn and

ninjas and our mascot is the unicorn and
the<00:57:18.559> name<00:57:18.880> we<00:57:19.040> don't<00:57:19.119> like<00:57:19.280> the<00:57:19.359> term<00:57:19.680> gym

the name we don't like the term gym

the name we don't like the term gym
because<00:57:20.160> a<00:57:20.160> lot<00:57:20.319> of<00:57:20.400> our<00:57:20.480> clients<00:57:20.799> don't<00:57:20.960> like

because a lot of our clients don't like

because a lot of our clients don't like
gym<00:57:21.520> so

gym so

gym so
we<00:57:22.480> call<00:57:22.640> our<00:57:22.720> home<00:57:22.960> the<00:57:23.040> enchanted<00:57:23.599> ninja

we call our home the enchanted ninja

we call our home the enchanted ninja
clubhouse<00:57:24.480> of<00:57:24.559> glory<00:57:24.960> and<00:57:25.119> dreams<00:57:26.079> and

clubhouse of glory and dreams and

clubhouse of glory and dreams and
we<00:57:27.440> cater<00:57:27.760> to<00:57:27.920> a<00:57:27.920> lot<00:57:28.000> of<00:57:28.079> people<00:57:28.240> in<00:57:28.319> the

we cater to a lot of people in the

we cater to a lot of people in the
broadway<00:57:28.880> community<00:57:29.440> but

broadway community but

broadway community but
generally<00:57:31.119> people<00:57:31.359> that<00:57:31.440> don't<00:57:31.680> like<00:57:32.000> gyms

generally people that don't like gyms

generally people that don't like gyms
most<00:57:33.599> of<00:57:33.680> the<00:57:33.839> people

most of the people

most of the people
like<00:57:35.200> uh<00:57:35.680> penis

like uh penis

like uh penis
except<00:57:36.960> for<00:57:37.119> the<00:57:37.200> lesbians<00:57:37.680> let's<00:57:37.839> put<00:57:37.920> it

except for the lesbians let's put it

except for the lesbians let's put it
that<00:57:38.160> way

that way

that way
so<00:57:39.119> it's<00:57:39.280> like<00:57:39.680> half<00:57:40.000> gay<00:57:40.160> men<00:57:40.480> about<00:57:40.720> half

so it's like half gay men about half

so it's like half gay men about half
women<00:57:41.440> and<00:57:41.520> then<00:57:41.680> we<00:57:41.839> have<00:57:42.079> like<00:57:42.319> a<00:57:42.480> decent<00:57:42.960> and

women and then we have like a decent and

women and then we have like a decent and
growing<00:57:43.359> sort<00:57:43.520> of<00:57:43.599> lesbian<00:57:44.000> contingency<00:57:45.040> and

growing sort of lesbian contingency and

growing sort of lesbian contingency and
then<00:57:45.359> a<00:57:45.440> sprinkling<00:57:46.079> of<00:57:46.240> like<00:57:46.480> uh<00:57:46.960> eccentric

then a sprinkling of like uh eccentric

then a sprinkling of like uh eccentric
straight<00:57:47.760> men<00:57:47.920> because<00:57:48.079> it's<00:57:48.160> a<00:57:48.240> very

straight men because it's a very

straight men because it's a very
specific<00:57:48.799> type<00:57:48.960> of<00:57:49.040> straight<00:57:49.280> man<00:57:49.680> it's<00:57:49.839> like

specific type of straight man it's like

specific type of straight man it's like
oh<00:57:50.240> yeah<00:57:50.640> i'll<00:57:50.799> work<00:57:51.040> out<00:57:51.119> in<00:57:51.200> this<00:57:51.359> place

oh yeah i'll work out in this place

oh yeah i'll work out in this place
and<00:57:52.400> it<00:57:52.480> tends<00:57:52.720> to<00:57:52.799> be<00:57:52.960> actors<00:57:53.280> tend<00:57:53.440> to<00:57:53.599> be

and it tends to be actors tend to be

and it tends to be actors tend to be
actors<00:57:53.920> but<00:57:54.079> not<00:57:54.240> always<00:57:54.880> i<00:57:55.040> feel<00:57:55.520> really

actors but not always i feel really

actors but not always i feel really
comfortable<00:57:58.160> with<00:57:58.319> it<00:57:58.400> i<00:57:58.480> feel<00:57:58.720> really

comfortable with it i feel really

comfortable with it i feel really
comfortable<00:57:59.440> around<00:58:00.160> uh<00:58:00.559> gay<00:58:00.880> people<00:58:01.119> in

comfortable around uh gay people in

comfortable around uh gay people in
general<00:58:01.680> i<00:58:01.839> think<00:58:02.079> because

general i think because

general i think because
most<00:58:03.920> of<00:58:04.000> my<00:58:04.160> professional<00:58:04.559> career<00:58:04.799> in<00:58:04.880> my<00:58:05.040> 20s

most of my professional career in my 20s

most of my professional career in my 20s
was<00:58:05.680> working<00:58:06.319> in

was working in

was working in
show<00:58:07.280> business<00:58:07.680> and<00:58:07.760> specifically<00:58:08.240> in<00:58:08.319> the

show business and specifically in the

show business and specifically in the
theater

theater

theater
lots<00:58:09.680> of<00:58:09.760> times<00:58:10.000> when<00:58:10.079> i<00:58:10.160> was<00:58:10.319> doing<00:58:10.559> shows

lots of times when i was doing shows

lots of times when i was doing shows
regionally<00:58:11.280> i<00:58:11.359> would<00:58:11.520> be<00:58:11.680> one<00:58:11.920> of<00:58:12.000> maybe<00:58:12.640> one

regionally i would be one of maybe one

regionally i would be one of maybe one
or<00:58:12.960> two<00:58:13.200> like<00:58:13.359> token<00:58:13.680> straight<00:58:14.000> guys<00:58:14.799> so<00:58:15.200> my

or two like token straight guys so my

or two like token straight guys so my
social<00:58:15.920> life<00:58:16.160> had<00:58:16.319> always<00:58:16.559> been<00:58:16.720> around<00:58:17.040> like

social life had always been around like

social life had always been around like
women<00:58:17.680> and<00:58:18.000> gay<00:58:18.240> men<00:58:18.880> and<00:58:19.200> a<00:58:19.280> lot<00:58:19.440> of<00:58:19.520> ways

women and gay men and a lot of ways

women and gay men and a lot of ways
quite<00:58:20.079> frankly

quite frankly

quite frankly
even<00:58:21.359> though<00:58:21.520> like<00:58:21.680> sexually<00:58:22.079> i<00:58:22.160> definitely

even though like sexually i definitely

even though like sexually i definitely
identify<00:58:22.880> as<00:58:22.960> a<00:58:23.040> straight<00:58:23.359> men<00:58:23.680> i

identify as a straight men i

identify as a straight men i
felt<00:58:24.799> in<00:58:24.880> a<00:58:24.880> lot<00:58:25.040> of<00:58:25.119> ways<00:58:25.280> my<00:58:25.520> values<00:58:26.000> were

felt in a lot of ways my values were

felt in a lot of ways my values were
more<00:58:26.400> aligned<00:58:26.880> with<00:58:27.040> that<00:58:27.280> community<00:58:28.000> and<00:58:28.160> we

more aligned with that community and we

more aligned with that community and we
tend<00:58:28.480> to<00:58:28.640> share<00:58:28.880> a<00:58:28.960> lot<00:58:29.119> of<00:58:29.200> the<00:58:29.280> same

tend to share a lot of the same

tend to share a lot of the same
sensibilities<00:58:30.640> a<00:58:30.720> lot<00:58:30.799> of<00:58:30.880> the<00:58:30.960> same

sensibilities a lot of the same

sensibilities a lot of the same
interests<00:58:32.000> so<00:58:32.160> i've<00:58:32.319> always<00:58:32.640> felt

interests so i've always felt

interests so i've always felt
comfortable<00:58:33.359> in<00:58:33.440> that<00:58:33.599> world<00:58:34.319> and<00:58:34.480> i<00:58:34.559> think

comfortable in that world and i think

comfortable in that world and i think
when<00:58:35.119> mark<00:58:35.359> fisher<00:58:35.680> fitness<00:58:36.000> happened

when mark fisher fitness happened

when mark fisher fitness happened
because<00:58:36.880> in<00:58:36.960> many<00:58:37.200> ways

because in many ways

because in many ways
it<00:58:38.240> was<00:58:38.400> really<00:58:38.559> an<00:58:38.720> opportunity<00:58:39.200> for<00:58:39.359> me<00:58:39.599> to

it was really an opportunity for me to

it was really an opportunity for me to
take<00:58:41.440> care<00:58:41.680> of<00:58:41.839> and<00:58:41.920> work<00:58:42.160> with<00:58:42.319> the<00:58:42.400> community

take care of and work with the community

take care of and work with the community
that<00:58:42.799> i<00:58:42.880> was<00:58:43.040> interested<00:58:43.359> in<00:58:43.680> i<00:58:43.839> you<00:58:44.000> know<00:58:44.079> i

that i was interested in i you know i

that i was interested in i you know i
think<00:58:44.240> that's<00:58:44.480> the<00:58:44.559> kind<00:58:44.720> of<00:58:44.799> business<00:58:45.119> 101

think that's the kind of business 101

think that's the kind of business 101
you<00:58:45.760> have<00:58:45.920> to<00:58:46.000> work<00:58:46.160> with<00:58:46.319> people<00:58:46.559> you<00:58:46.799> really

you have to work with people you really

you have to work with people you really
know<00:58:47.440> to<00:58:47.599> get<00:58:47.839> their<00:58:48.000> heads<00:58:48.720> and<00:58:48.880> for<00:58:49.119> me<00:58:49.760> i

know to get their heads and for me i

know to get their heads and for me i
don't<00:58:50.480> think<00:58:50.720> if<00:58:50.880> i<00:58:50.960> want<00:58:51.119> so<00:58:51.280> i<00:58:51.359> could<00:58:51.520> like

don't think if i want so i could like

don't think if i want so i could like
really<00:58:52.240> get<00:58:52.400> in<00:58:52.480> the<00:58:52.559> head<00:58:52.799> of<00:58:52.880> like<00:58:53.040> a<00:58:53.119> new

really get in the head of like a new

really get in the head of like a new
york<00:58:53.359> city<00:58:53.520> like<00:58:53.680> straight<00:58:53.920> guy<00:58:54.079> like<00:58:54.240> it's

york city like straight guy like it's

york city like straight guy like it's
cool<00:58:54.480> if<00:58:54.559> they<00:58:54.640> want<00:58:54.799> to<00:58:54.880> come<00:58:55.599> but<00:58:55.760> i<00:58:55.839> feel

cool if they want to come but i feel

cool if they want to come but i feel
like<00:58:56.240> man<00:58:56.480> i<00:58:56.559> really<00:58:56.880> know<00:58:57.119> like

like man i really know like

like man i really know like
what's<00:58:58.240> going<00:58:58.400> on<00:58:58.559> with<00:58:58.720> these<00:58:58.880> people<00:58:59.119> i<00:58:59.200> know

what's going on with these people i know

what's going on with these people i know
that<00:58:59.520> the<00:58:59.680> way<00:59:00.000> they<00:59:00.160> need<00:59:00.319> to<00:59:00.400> hear<00:59:00.640> this

that the way they need to hear this

that the way they need to hear this
information<00:59:01.280> that's<00:59:01.520> going<00:59:01.599> to<00:59:01.760> really<00:59:02.000> quick

information that's going to really quick

information that's going to really quick
with<00:59:02.400> them

with them

with them
and

and

and
that<00:59:05.200> i<00:59:05.280> think<00:59:05.440> has<00:59:05.599> been<00:59:05.760> very<00:59:05.920> fulfilling<00:59:06.720> i

that i think has been very fulfilling i

that i think has been very fulfilling i
am<00:59:07.200> is<00:59:07.359> definitely<00:59:07.760> interested

am is definitely interested

am is definitely interested
intellectually<00:59:09.040> in<00:59:09.359> like<00:59:09.680> what<00:59:10.000> masculinity

intellectually in like what masculinity

intellectually in like what masculinity
is

is

is
and<00:59:12.480> it<00:59:12.720> may<00:59:12.960> or<00:59:13.119> may<00:59:13.280> not<00:59:13.440> be<00:59:13.599> obvious

and it may or may not be obvious

and it may or may not be obvious
that

that

that
because<00:59:16.240> like<00:59:16.400> obviously<00:59:16.720> if<00:59:16.799> you<00:59:16.960> look<00:59:17.119> at

because like obviously if you look at

because like obviously if you look at
our<00:59:17.440> information<00:59:18.160> on<00:59:18.400> the<00:59:18.559> website<00:59:19.040> if<00:59:19.119> you

our information on the website if you

our information on the website if you
look<00:59:19.359> at<00:59:19.440> the<00:59:19.520> way<00:59:19.680> i<00:59:19.760> behave<00:59:20.160> a<00:59:20.240> lot<00:59:20.400> if<00:59:20.480> you

look at the way i behave a lot if you

look at the way i behave a lot if you
look<00:59:20.720> a<00:59:20.720> lot<00:59:20.960> of<00:59:21.040> my<00:59:21.200> silly<00:59:21.599> antics<00:59:22.400> if<00:59:22.559> you

look a lot of my silly antics if you

look a lot of my silly antics if you
look<00:59:22.880> at<00:59:23.119> i<00:59:23.200> think<00:59:23.440> my<00:59:23.680> comfort<00:59:24.319> with<00:59:24.720> uh<00:59:25.280> gay

look at i think my comfort with uh gay

look at i think my comfort with uh gay
men<00:59:26.000> and

men and

men and
um

um

um
you<00:59:28.480> know<00:59:28.559> the<00:59:28.640> lgbt<00:59:29.280> community<00:59:29.839> for<00:59:30.079> me

you know the lgbt community for me

you know the lgbt community for me
like<00:59:31.440> i'm<00:59:31.680> fascinated<00:59:32.240> by<00:59:32.480> these<00:59:32.640> sort<00:59:32.799> of

like i'm fascinated by these sort of

like i'm fascinated by these sort of
like<00:59:33.040> this<00:59:33.200> american<00:59:33.839> mckees<00:59:34.319> most<00:59:34.480> sort<00:59:34.559> of

like this american mckees most sort of

like this american mckees most sort of
like<00:59:34.960> cowboy

like cowboy

like cowboy
like<00:59:36.559> cigarette<00:59:37.040> smoking<00:59:37.599> like<00:59:37.839> hyper

like cigarette smoking like hyper

like cigarette smoking like hyper
competitive<00:59:38.880> man

competitive man

competitive man
because<00:59:40.640> i'm

because i'm

because i'm
certainly<00:59:42.000> like<00:59:42.160> a<00:59:42.240> provocateur<00:59:42.799> like

certainly like a provocateur like

certainly like a provocateur like
there's<00:59:43.200> definitely<00:59:43.440> i'm<00:59:43.520> definitely

there's definitely i'm definitely

there's definitely i'm definitely
provocateur<00:59:44.319> like<00:59:44.480> i<00:59:44.559> kind<00:59:44.720> of<00:59:44.799> love<00:59:45.119> like

provocateur like i kind of love like

provocateur like i kind of love like
playing<00:59:46.000> with<00:59:46.079> those<00:59:46.240> stereotypes<00:59:46.799> and<00:59:46.880> i

playing with those stereotypes and i

playing with those stereotypes and i
frankly<00:59:47.359> like<00:59:47.520> part<00:59:47.680> of<00:59:47.760> me<00:59:47.839> likes<00:59:48.079> being<00:59:48.240> in

frankly like part of me likes being in

frankly like part of me likes being in
the<00:59:48.319> fitness<00:59:48.640> industry<00:59:48.960> and<00:59:49.119> like

the fitness industry and like

the fitness industry and like
uh<00:59:50.400> you<00:59:50.480> know<00:59:50.720> i'm

uh you know i'm

uh you know i'm
willing<00:59:52.000> to<00:59:52.079> make<00:59:52.319> some<00:59:52.480> other<00:59:52.640> fit<00:59:52.799> pros<00:59:53.040> like

willing to make some other fit pros like

willing to make some other fit pros like
uncomfortable<00:59:53.920> and<00:59:54.079> behave<00:59:54.400> in<00:59:54.480> a<00:59:54.559> way<00:59:54.720> that

uncomfortable and behave in a way that

uncomfortable and behave in a way that
for<00:59:54.880> them<00:59:55.119> i<00:59:55.119> was<00:59:55.200> like<00:59:55.280> well<00:59:55.440> that<00:59:55.599> guy's

for them i was like well that guy's

for them i was like well that guy's
crazy<00:59:56.240> he's<00:59:56.720> wearing<00:59:56.880> a<00:59:56.960> tutu<00:59:57.359> it's<00:59:57.440> crazy<00:59:58.160> um

crazy he's wearing a tutu it's crazy um

crazy he's wearing a tutu it's crazy um
because<00:59:59.520> i<00:59:59.599> think<00:59:59.839> that<01:00:00.079> there's<01:00:00.880> room<01:00:01.200> for<01:00:01.280> a

because i think that there's room for a

because i think that there's room for a
more<01:00:01.599> expansive<01:00:02.240> definition<01:00:02.720> of<01:00:02.799> what

more expansive definition of what

more expansive definition of what
masculinity<01:00:03.680> is

masculinity is

masculinity is
and<01:00:04.640> i<01:00:04.720> know<01:00:04.880> that's<01:00:05.040> like<01:00:05.200> a<01:00:05.359> weird<01:00:05.760> thing

and i know that's like a weird thing

and i know that's like a weird thing
that<01:00:06.480> is<01:00:06.559> maybe<01:00:06.799> not<01:00:06.960> apparent<01:00:07.280> about<01:00:07.440> mark

that is maybe not apparent about mark

that is maybe not apparent about mark
fisher<01:00:07.920> fitness<01:00:08.240> but<01:00:08.400> i<01:00:08.559> actually<01:00:08.799> hope<01:00:09.040> that

fisher fitness but i actually hope that

fisher fitness but i actually hope that
that's<01:00:09.280> part<01:00:09.440> of<01:00:09.520> the<01:00:09.599> legacy<01:00:10.000> of<01:00:10.079> mff<01:00:11.040> i<01:00:11.200> would

that's part of the legacy of mff i would

that's part of the legacy of mff i would
identify<01:00:12.240> as<01:00:13.040> an<01:00:13.280> activist<01:00:14.079> for<01:00:14.400> happiness

identify as an activist for happiness

identify as an activist for happiness
and<01:00:15.280> of<01:00:15.440> happiness<01:00:16.240> it<01:00:16.400> started<01:00:16.799> out<01:00:17.119> as<01:00:17.599> just

and of happiness it started out as just

and of happiness it started out as just
holding<01:00:18.319> your<01:00:18.559> beautiful<01:00:18.960> signs<01:00:19.440> out<01:00:19.680> on<01:00:19.760> the

holding your beautiful signs out on the

holding your beautiful signs out on the
sidewalks<01:00:20.799> for<01:00:20.960> people<01:00:21.200> to<01:00:21.280> see<01:00:21.680> and

sidewalks for people to see and

sidewalks for people to see and
then<01:00:24.160> turn<01:00:24.400> into<01:00:24.640> something<01:00:24.960> where<01:00:25.200> i<01:00:25.359> wanted

then turn into something where i wanted

then turn into something where i wanted
to<01:00:25.839> try<01:00:26.000> to

to try to

to try to
prevent<01:00:27.280> teen<01:00:27.520> suicide<01:00:28.079> self-harm<01:00:28.559> and

prevent teen suicide self-harm and

prevent teen suicide self-harm and
bullying<01:00:29.359> i<01:00:29.520> definitely<01:00:29.839> feel<01:00:30.079> like<01:00:30.319> it<01:00:30.400> can

bullying i definitely feel like it can

bullying i definitely feel like it can
affect<01:00:30.960> people's<01:00:31.280> identities<01:00:32.000> because

affect people's identities because

affect people's identities because
people<01:00:33.119> can<01:00:33.280> be<01:00:33.440> bullied<01:00:34.000> and

people can be bullied and

people can be bullied and
then<01:00:35.040> not<01:00:35.280> feel<01:00:35.599> positive<01:00:36.000> about<01:00:36.240> themselves

then not feel positive about themselves

then not feel positive about themselves
and<01:00:36.799> feel<01:00:36.960> like<01:00:37.040> they<01:00:37.200> have<01:00:37.280> to<01:00:37.440> change<01:00:37.760> who

and feel like they have to change who

and feel like they have to change who
they<01:00:38.160> are<01:00:38.559> which<01:00:38.960> is<01:00:39.119> not<01:00:39.280> true<01:00:39.599> at<01:00:39.760> all<01:00:40.240> i<01:00:40.400> have

they are which is not true at all i have

they are which is not true at all i have
spina<01:00:40.880> bifida<01:00:41.599> it's<01:00:41.760> a

spina bifida it's a

spina bifida it's a
disability<01:00:42.960> that<01:00:43.040> you're<01:00:43.200> born<01:00:43.440> with<01:00:43.680> it's

disability that you're born with it's

disability that you're born with it's
not<01:00:43.920> something<01:00:44.160> you<01:00:44.319> can<01:00:44.480> catch

not something you can catch

not something you can catch
it's<01:00:45.520> not<01:00:45.680> something<01:00:45.920> that<01:00:46.079> you<01:00:46.480> can<01:00:46.640> develop

it's not something that you can develop

it's not something that you can develop
later<01:00:47.280> on<01:00:47.440> in<01:00:47.520> life<01:00:47.760> you<01:00:47.839> just<01:00:48.000> are<01:00:48.160> born<01:00:48.400> with

later on in life you just are born with

later on in life you just are born with
it<01:00:48.880> or<01:00:49.119> you<01:00:49.280> don't<01:00:49.520> have<01:00:49.680> it

it or you don't have it

it or you don't have it
and<01:00:50.720> it's<01:00:50.880> basically<01:00:51.200> an<01:00:51.359> opening<01:00:51.599> in<01:00:51.680> the

and it's basically an opening in the

and it's basically an opening in the
spine<01:00:52.079> it<01:00:52.160> can<01:00:52.319> happen<01:00:52.559> anywhere<01:00:52.880> on<01:00:52.960> the

spine it can happen anywhere on the

spine it can happen anywhere on the
spine<01:00:53.680> anywhere<01:00:54.160> from<01:00:54.400> the<01:00:54.480> bottom<01:00:54.720> of<01:00:54.799> the

spine anywhere from the bottom of the

spine anywhere from the bottom of the
spine<01:00:55.280> up<01:00:55.359> to<01:00:55.440> the<01:00:55.520> top<01:00:55.920> to<01:00:56.000> your<01:00:56.160> head<01:00:56.400> where

spine up to the top to your head where

spine up to the top to your head where
your<01:00:56.880> brain<01:00:57.119> is<01:00:57.280> exposed<01:00:57.839> it<01:00:58.000> puts<01:00:58.160> so<01:00:58.319> much

your brain is exposed it puts so much

your brain is exposed it puts so much
pressure<01:00:58.880> on<01:00:58.960> that<01:00:59.119> it<01:00:59.200> does<01:00:59.520> usually<01:00:59.839> cause

pressure on that it does usually cause

pressure on that it does usually cause
learning<01:01:00.319> disabilities<01:01:01.119> which<01:01:01.359> it<01:01:01.520> did<01:01:01.680> for

learning disabilities which it did for

learning disabilities which it did for
me<01:01:02.480> i<01:01:02.640> mean<01:01:02.799> not<01:01:03.040> horrendous<01:01:03.760> but<01:01:03.920> it<01:01:04.000> was

me i mean not horrendous but it was

me i mean not horrendous but it was
enough<01:01:04.480> to<01:01:04.640> affect<01:01:04.960> me<01:01:05.119> in<01:01:05.200> school<01:01:05.599> it<01:01:05.680> was

enough to affect me in school it was

enough to affect me in school it was
enough<01:01:06.079> to<01:01:06.319> affect<01:01:06.720> me

enough to affect me

enough to affect me
you<01:01:08.000> know<01:01:08.160> forever<01:01:08.960> there's<01:01:09.200> always

you know forever there's always

you know forever there's always
something<01:01:09.680> out<01:01:09.839> there<01:01:10.000> that<01:01:10.079> reminds<01:01:10.480> you

something out there that reminds you

something out there that reminds you
that<01:01:11.359> that

that that

that that
you're<01:01:12.640> different

you're different

you're different
when<01:01:14.000> you<01:01:14.079> have<01:01:14.240> a<01:01:14.319> disability

when you have a disability

when you have a disability
that<01:01:16.160> you're<01:01:16.400> actually<01:01:16.720> born<01:01:17.040> with<01:01:17.680> it<01:01:17.839> shapes

that you're actually born with it shapes

that you're actually born with it shapes
your<01:01:18.240> identity<01:01:19.040> right<01:01:19.280> off<01:01:19.440> the<01:01:19.520> bat

your identity right off the bat

your identity right off the bat
as<01:01:20.480> opposed<01:01:20.880> to<01:01:21.040> maybe<01:01:21.839> if<01:01:22.000> you<01:01:22.079> had<01:01:22.240> a<01:01:22.319> car

as opposed to maybe if you had a car

as opposed to maybe if you had a car
accident<01:01:22.799> when<01:01:22.880> you're<01:01:23.040> 18<01:01:23.359> and<01:01:23.440> by<01:01:23.599> then

accident when you're 18 and by then

accident when you're 18 and by then
you're<01:01:23.920> already<01:01:24.240> you<01:01:24.319> have<01:01:24.480> an<01:01:24.559> identity<01:01:25.040> it's

you're already you have an identity it's

you're already you have an identity it's
shaped

shaped

shaped
not<01:01:26.319> much<01:01:26.559> is<01:01:26.640> going<01:01:26.720> to<01:01:26.880> play<01:01:27.040> with<01:01:27.200> that

not much is going to play with that

not much is going to play with that
so

so

so
it<01:01:29.520> creates

it creates

it creates
somebody<01:01:31.119> that<01:01:31.359> probably<01:01:31.599> wouldn't<01:01:31.839> have

somebody that probably wouldn't have

somebody that probably wouldn't have
existed<01:01:32.640> tourette's<01:01:33.119> defines<01:01:33.520> me

existed tourette's defines me

existed tourette's defines me
i<01:01:35.440> wouldn't<01:01:35.760> if<01:01:35.839> there<01:01:36.000> was<01:01:36.160> a<01:01:36.240> cure<01:01:36.559> tomorrow

i wouldn't if there was a cure tomorrow

i wouldn't if there was a cure tomorrow
for<01:01:37.119> tourette<01:01:37.440> syndrome<01:01:37.760> and<01:01:37.839> i've<01:01:37.920> said<01:01:38.079> this

for tourette syndrome and i've said this

for tourette syndrome and i've said this
over<01:01:38.480> and<01:01:38.640> over<01:01:38.799> before<01:01:39.359> i<01:01:39.520> would<01:01:39.680> never<01:01:40.000> take

over and over before i would never take

over and over before i would never take
that<01:01:40.400> pill

that pill

that pill
tourette<01:01:41.520> syndrome<01:01:41.920> is<01:01:42.000> a<01:01:42.079> part<01:01:42.240> of<01:01:42.319> me<01:01:42.559> it

tourette syndrome is a part of me it

tourette syndrome is a part of me it
made<01:01:42.799> me<01:01:42.960> the<01:01:43.040> person<01:01:43.359> that<01:01:43.520> i<01:01:43.680> am<01:01:44.160> made<01:01:44.400> me<01:01:44.480> a

made me the person that i am made me a

made me the person that i am made me a
compassionate<01:01:45.200> person<01:01:45.599> it<01:01:45.760> made<01:01:45.920> me<01:01:46.240> realize

compassionate person it made me realize

compassionate person it made me realize
how<01:01:47.599> to<01:01:47.760> be<01:01:48.319> towards<01:01:48.640> other<01:01:48.799> human<01:01:49.119> beings

how to be towards other human beings

how to be towards other human beings
and

and

and
i<01:01:51.440> would<01:01:51.599> never<01:01:51.839> get<01:01:52.000> rid<01:01:52.160> of<01:01:52.319> it<01:01:52.640> so<01:01:53.119> um<01:01:53.680> for<01:01:53.839> me

i would never get rid of it so um for me

i would never get rid of it so um for me
tourette's<01:01:54.400> defines<01:01:54.799> me<01:01:55.039> as<01:01:55.119> the<01:01:55.200> person<01:01:55.520> that

tourette's defines me as the person that

tourette's defines me as the person that
i<01:01:55.760> am<01:01:55.920> today

i am today

i am today
and<01:01:57.440> i<01:01:57.680> am<01:01:57.839> damn<01:01:58.079> proud<01:01:58.720> that<01:01:58.880> i<01:01:58.960> have<01:01:59.200> it<01:01:59.359> i<01:01:59.440> am

and i am damn proud that i have it i am

and i am damn proud that i have it i am
completely<01:02:00.000> proud<01:02:00.240> of<01:02:00.400> it<01:02:00.799> i'm<01:02:01.119> a<01:02:01.200> male

completely proud of it i'm a male

completely proud of it i'm a male
i'm<01:02:02.640> a<01:02:02.720> straight<01:02:03.039> guy

i'm a straight guy

i'm a straight guy
i'm<01:02:04.400> a<01:02:04.480> nice<01:02:04.799> guy<01:02:05.440> i<01:02:05.599> was<01:02:05.760> diagnosed<01:02:06.240> at<01:02:06.400> around

i'm a nice guy i was diagnosed at around

i'm a nice guy i was diagnosed at around
uh

uh

uh
five<01:02:08.400> or<01:02:08.559> six<01:02:09.039> you<01:02:09.200> know<01:02:09.280> had<01:02:09.520> it<01:02:09.599> forever<01:02:09.839> it's

five or six you know had it forever it's

five or six you know had it forever it's
a<01:02:10.000> neurological<01:02:10.640> disorder

a neurological disorder

a neurological disorder
uh<01:02:12.240> it's<01:02:12.400> not<01:02:12.559> a<01:02:12.640> disease<01:02:13.039> a<01:02:13.119> lot<01:02:13.280> of<01:02:13.359> people

uh it's not a disease a lot of people

uh it's not a disease a lot of people
you<01:02:13.920> know<01:02:14.160> misconstrue<01:02:14.799> it<01:02:14.880> but<01:02:15.039> it's<01:02:15.200> a

you know misconstrue it but it's a

you know misconstrue it but it's a
disorder<01:02:15.839> and<01:02:16.160> uh

disorder and uh

disorder and uh
something<01:02:17.920> i've<01:02:18.079> been<01:02:18.240> struggling<01:02:18.640> with

something i've been struggling with

something i've been struggling with
since<01:02:19.280> uh<01:02:19.599> i<01:02:19.680> was<01:02:19.920> five<01:02:20.079> years<01:02:20.400> old<01:02:21.039> bullying

since uh i was five years old bullying

since uh i was five years old bullying
could<01:02:21.440> go<01:02:21.599> so<01:02:21.760> many<01:02:21.920> ways<01:02:22.160> for<01:02:22.319> so<01:02:22.480> many<01:02:22.720> people

could go so many ways for so many people

could go so many ways for so many people
and<01:02:23.599> it<01:02:23.760> really<01:02:24.079> really<01:02:24.240> really<01:02:24.480> put<01:02:24.640> me<01:02:24.880> down

and it really really really put me down

and it really really really put me down
it<01:02:25.280> really<01:02:25.520> truly<01:02:25.839> did<01:02:26.400> um<01:02:26.720> and<01:02:26.799> it<01:02:26.960> still

it really truly did um and it still

it really truly did um and it still
affects<01:02:27.440> me<01:02:27.599> to<01:02:27.680> this<01:02:27.839> day<01:02:28.319> you<01:02:28.400> know<01:02:28.640> kids

affects me to this day you know kids

affects me to this day you know kids
kids<01:02:29.280> are<01:02:29.440> so<01:02:29.680> important<01:02:30.160> in<01:02:30.240> today<01:02:30.559> in<01:02:30.640> the

kids are so important in today in the

kids are so important in today in the
future<01:02:31.119> and<01:02:31.200> everything<01:02:31.520> that<01:02:31.920> that<01:02:32.079> we're

future and everything that that we're

future and everything that that we're
doing

doing

doing
and<01:02:33.520> um<01:02:34.319> when<01:02:34.559> you<01:02:34.960> are<01:02:35.119> going<01:02:35.359> through

and um when you are going through

and um when you are going through
something<01:02:35.760> at<01:02:35.839> a<01:02:35.920> young<01:02:36.160> age<01:02:36.319> that<01:02:36.480> stuff

something at a young age that stuff

something at a young age that stuff
sticks<01:02:36.960> with<01:02:37.119> you

sticks with you

sticks with you
no<01:02:38.000> matter<01:02:38.240> what<01:02:38.400> you<01:02:38.559> go<01:02:38.720> or<01:02:38.799> how<01:02:38.960> much

no matter what you go or how much

no matter what you go or how much
therapy<01:02:39.599> or<01:02:39.760> anything<01:02:40.160> that<01:02:40.240> you<01:02:40.400> can<01:02:40.559> go

therapy or anything that you can go

therapy or anything that you can go
through<01:02:41.280> it's<01:02:41.760> it's<01:02:42.240> gonna<01:02:42.480> be<01:02:42.640> with<01:02:42.799> you<01:02:42.960> and

through it's it's gonna be with you and

through it's it's gonna be with you and
it's<01:02:43.200> gonna<01:02:43.440> you're<01:02:43.520> gonna<01:02:43.680> relive<01:02:43.920> it<01:02:44.000> i'm<01:02:44.160> a

it's gonna you're gonna relive it i'm a

it's gonna you're gonna relive it i'm a
photographer

photographer

photographer
an<01:02:46.160> actor<01:02:47.200> a<01:02:47.359> fashionista

an actor a fashionista

an actor a fashionista
and<01:02:48.960> a<01:02:49.039> dog<01:02:49.359> walker

and a dog walker

and a dog walker
when<01:02:50.559> i<01:02:50.640> found<01:02:50.880> out<01:02:51.039> that<01:02:51.119> i<01:02:51.200> was<01:02:51.359> hiv<01:02:52.000> in<01:02:52.079> 1996

when i found out that i was hiv in 1996

when i found out that i was hiv in 1996
i<01:02:53.119> was<01:02:53.359> only<01:02:53.599> 25.<01:02:54.640> and<01:02:54.880> back<01:02:55.119> then<01:02:55.440> it<01:02:55.520> was<01:02:55.760> a

i was only 25. and back then it was a

i was only 25. and back then it was a
death<01:02:56.079> sentence<01:02:56.480> they<01:02:56.640> gave<01:02:56.799> me<01:02:56.880> five<01:02:57.119> years

death sentence they gave me five years

death sentence they gave me five years
to<01:02:57.520> live

to live

to live
but<01:02:58.799> i<01:02:58.960> remember<01:02:59.359> looking<01:02:59.599> at<01:02:59.680> myself<01:03:00.160> in<01:03:00.240> the

but i remember looking at myself in the

but i remember looking at myself in the
mirror<01:03:00.960> and<01:03:01.119> you<01:03:01.280> know<01:03:01.440> the<01:03:01.520> light<01:03:01.760> that<01:03:01.839> we

mirror and you know the light that we

mirror and you know the light that we
have<01:03:02.079> in<01:03:02.240> our<01:03:02.400> eyes

have in our eyes

have in our eyes
the<01:03:03.440> light<01:03:03.680> disappeared

the light disappeared

the light disappeared
i<01:03:05.359> feel<01:03:05.599> dead<01:03:05.920> inside<01:03:06.960> i<01:03:07.119> was<01:03:07.200> just<01:03:07.440> crying<01:03:07.760> for

i feel dead inside i was just crying for

i feel dead inside i was just crying for
a<01:03:08.079> while<01:03:08.400> i<01:03:08.480> thought<01:03:08.720> i<01:03:08.799> was<01:03:08.880> just<01:03:09.119> gonna<01:03:09.359> die<01:03:09.680> i

a while i thought i was just gonna die i

a while i thought i was just gonna die i
thought<01:03:09.920> it<01:03:10.000> was<01:03:10.160> like<01:03:10.400> a

thought it was like a

thought it was like a
a<01:03:11.599> time<01:03:12.319> time<01:03:12.640> bomb

a time time bomb

a time time bomb
but<01:03:14.160> they<01:03:14.319> said<01:03:14.480> you<01:03:14.640> know<01:03:14.799> what<01:03:14.960> i<01:03:15.039> have<01:03:15.200> five

but they said you know what i have five

but they said you know what i have five
years<01:03:15.599> to<01:03:15.839> live<01:03:16.559> i'm<01:03:16.640> gonna

years to live i'm gonna

years to live i'm gonna
leave<01:03:17.760> mexico<01:03:18.880> i<01:03:19.039> have<01:03:19.119> the<01:03:19.200> opportunity<01:03:19.599> to

leave mexico i have the opportunity to

leave mexico i have the opportunity to
move<01:03:19.839> to<01:03:19.920> new<01:03:20.079> york<01:03:20.400> because<01:03:21.280> i<01:03:21.440> was<01:03:21.599> able<01:03:21.839> to

move to new york because i was able to

move to new york because i was able to
get<01:03:22.079> a<01:03:22.240> doctor

get a doctor

get a doctor
and

and

and
luckily

luckily

luckily
i<01:03:25.440> mean<01:03:25.839> it's<01:03:26.000> not<01:03:26.240> a<01:03:26.319> death<01:03:26.480> sentence<01:03:26.880> anymore

i mean it's not a death sentence anymore

i mean it's not a death sentence anymore
like<01:03:28.000> i've<01:03:28.160> been<01:03:28.319> undetectable

like i've been undetectable

like i've been undetectable
i've<01:03:29.920> never<01:03:30.240> been<01:03:30.480> sick

i've never been sick

i've never been sick
it's<01:03:32.640> almost<01:03:33.039> what<01:03:33.280> it's<01:03:33.440> 96<01:03:34.079> till<01:03:34.400> now<01:03:34.720> it's

it's almost what it's 96 till now it's

it's almost what it's 96 till now it's
almost

almost

almost
what<01:03:36.160> 16<01:03:36.559> years<01:03:37.280> 15<01:03:37.680> years<01:03:38.000> hiv<01:03:38.400> positive<01:03:39.280> and

what 16 years 15 years hiv positive and

what 16 years 15 years hiv positive and
healthy<01:03:39.839> never<01:03:40.160> been<01:03:40.319> sick<01:03:41.039> well<01:03:41.280> i

healthy never been sick well i

healthy never been sick well i
definitely<01:03:42.079> say

definitely say

definitely say
everything<01:03:44.240> i'm<01:03:44.319> gonna<01:03:44.559> do<01:03:44.720> my<01:03:44.960> life<01:03:45.599> i<01:03:45.760> don't

everything i'm gonna do my life i don't

everything i'm gonna do my life i don't
care<01:03:46.079> what<01:03:46.240> anybody<01:03:46.720> says<01:03:47.440> he<01:03:47.599> cannot<01:03:47.920> like

care what anybody says he cannot like

care what anybody says he cannot like
what's<01:03:48.400> the<01:03:48.480> best<01:03:48.640> thing<01:03:48.799> to<01:03:48.960> happen<01:03:49.200> to<01:03:49.280> me

what's the best thing to happen to me

what's the best thing to happen to me
give<01:03:49.599> me<01:03:49.839> courage

give me courage

give me courage
i<01:03:50.960> come<01:03:51.119> to<01:03:51.280> new<01:03:51.440> york<01:03:51.680> and<01:03:51.839> i<01:03:51.920> get<01:03:52.079> tattoos<01:03:53.200> i

i come to new york and i get tattoos i

i come to new york and i get tattoos i
bleach<01:03:53.839> my<01:03:54.079> hair<01:03:54.400> i<01:03:54.480> get<01:03:54.640> a<01:03:54.720> mohawk

bleach my hair i get a mohawk

bleach my hair i get a mohawk
i<01:03:56.079> have<01:03:56.319> the<01:03:56.559> drugs<01:03:57.520> i<01:03:57.680> have<01:03:57.920> tons<01:03:58.160> of<01:03:58.319> sex<01:03:59.200> so<01:03:59.359> i

i have the drugs i have tons of sex so i

i have the drugs i have tons of sex so i
did<01:03:59.680> all<01:03:59.760> the<01:03:59.839> things<01:04:00.079> that<01:04:00.160> i<01:04:00.319> never<01:04:00.559> did

did all the things that i never did

did all the things that i never did
so<01:04:01.920> it<01:04:02.079> was<01:04:02.240> kind<01:04:02.400> of<01:04:02.559> like<01:04:02.799> a

so it was kind of like a

so it was kind of like a
revolution<01:04:05.280> for<01:04:05.440> me<01:04:05.599> to<01:04:05.760> find<01:04:06.000> out<01:04:06.160> about<01:04:06.480> it

revolution for me to find out about it

revolution for me to find out about it
and<01:04:06.799> luckily

and luckily

and luckily
it<01:04:08.240> got

it got

it got
better<01:04:09.359> and<01:04:09.440> better<01:04:09.760> like<01:04:10.000> nobody<01:04:10.400> died

better and better like nobody died

better and better like nobody died
anymore<01:04:12.000> i'm

anymore i'm

anymore i'm
a<01:04:12.960> male<01:04:13.599> i'm

a male i'm

a male i'm
a<01:04:14.880> new<01:04:15.039> yorker<01:04:15.760> i'm

a new yorker i'm

a new yorker i'm
a

a

a
singer<01:04:18.319> i'm<01:04:18.559> an<01:04:18.720> actor<01:04:19.039> i'm<01:04:19.200> a<01:04:19.280> songwriter<01:04:20.079> i'm

singer i'm an actor i'm a songwriter i'm

singer i'm an actor i'm a songwriter i'm
a<01:04:20.480> host<01:04:21.280> of<01:04:21.520> internet<01:04:21.839> television<01:04:22.400> and<01:04:22.480> radio

a host of internet television and radio

a host of internet television and radio
and

and

and
take<01:04:24.000> your<01:04:24.240> pick<01:04:24.559> i<01:04:24.799> answer<01:04:25.039> to<01:04:25.200> pretty<01:04:25.440> much

take your pick i answer to pretty much

take your pick i answer to pretty much
anything<01:04:26.240> well<01:04:26.480> one<01:04:26.880> label<01:04:27.280> that<01:04:27.520> i<01:04:27.760> had<01:04:28.240> was

anything well one label that i had was

anything well one label that i had was
overweight<01:04:29.599> that<01:04:29.760> was<01:04:29.920> another<01:04:30.319> one

overweight that was another one

overweight that was another one
i<01:04:31.359> was<01:04:31.599> almost<01:04:31.920> 300<01:04:32.559> pounds

i was almost 300 pounds

i was almost 300 pounds
i<01:04:34.079> had<01:04:34.480> diabetes<01:04:35.359> that<01:04:35.839> my<01:04:36.079> sugar<01:04:36.400> levels

i had diabetes that my sugar levels

i had diabetes that my sugar levels
for<01:04:37.760> a<01:04:37.839> year<01:04:38.079> and<01:04:38.240> a<01:04:38.319> half<01:04:38.720> were<01:04:39.119> pretty<01:04:39.440> much

for a year and a half were pretty much

for a year and a half were pretty much
emergency<01:04:41.440> room<01:04:41.680> levels<01:04:42.160> i<01:04:42.319> was<01:04:42.720> days<01:04:43.119> away

emergency room levels i was days away

emergency room levels i was days away
from<01:04:44.079> going<01:04:44.400> on<01:04:44.640> insulin

from going on insulin

from going on insulin
rather<01:04:46.400> than<01:04:46.720> do<01:04:46.960> that<01:04:47.359> i<01:04:47.839> opted<01:04:48.400> for<01:04:48.720> surgery

rather than do that i opted for surgery

rather than do that i opted for surgery
just<01:04:49.839> to<01:04:50.000> see<01:04:50.160> what<01:04:50.400> would<01:04:50.559> happen<01:04:51.039> and<01:04:51.280> i've

just to see what would happen and i've

just to see what would happen and i've
lost<01:04:51.760> almost<01:04:52.079> 100<01:04:52.480> pounds

lost almost 100 pounds

lost almost 100 pounds
i<01:04:54.720> do

i do

i do
notice<01:04:56.240> that<01:04:56.640> i

notice that i

notice that i
more<01:04:58.559> casting<01:04:59.119> roles<01:05:00.079> uh<01:05:00.400> apply<01:05:00.799> to<01:05:00.960> me

more casting roles uh apply to me

more casting roles uh apply to me
um<01:05:02.720> being<01:05:03.200> thinner

um being thinner

um being thinner
in<01:05:05.599> the<01:05:05.760> entertainment<01:05:06.400> industry

in the entertainment industry

in the entertainment industry
a<01:05:07.599> lot<01:05:07.839> a<01:05:07.920> lot<01:05:08.079> of<01:05:08.160> it<01:05:08.319> is<01:05:08.480> very<01:05:08.720> much<01:05:08.880> about

a lot a lot of it is very much about

a lot a lot of it is very much about
image<01:05:09.680> in<01:05:09.839> the<01:05:10.079> gay<01:05:10.319> community<01:05:11.039> it's<01:05:11.200> about

image in the gay community it's about

image in the gay community it's about
image<01:05:12.400> i<01:05:12.480> was<01:05:12.720> just<01:05:13.039> on<01:05:13.200> a<01:05:13.359> on<01:05:13.520> a<01:05:13.760> retreat<01:05:14.240> a<01:05:14.319> gay

image i was just on a on a retreat a gay

image i was just on a on a retreat a gay
men's<01:05:14.799> retreat<01:05:15.280> last<01:05:15.440> weekend<01:05:15.839> up<01:05:16.000> at<01:05:16.160> easton

men's retreat last weekend up at easton

men's retreat last weekend up at easton
mountain<01:05:16.799> which<01:05:16.960> was<01:05:17.280> absolutely<01:05:17.920> wonderful

mountain which was absolutely wonderful

mountain which was absolutely wonderful
i<01:05:18.720> met<01:05:18.960> some<01:05:19.200> amazing<01:05:19.760> men<01:05:20.400> the<01:05:20.960> thing<01:05:21.280> was<01:05:21.280> was

i met some amazing men the thing was was

i met some amazing men the thing was was
when<01:05:23.119> they<01:05:23.359> actually<01:05:23.760> sat<01:05:24.079> down<01:05:24.400> and<01:05:24.559> got<01:05:24.799> to

when they actually sat down and got to

when they actually sat down and got to
talk<01:05:25.200> to<01:05:25.359> me<01:05:25.599> or<01:05:25.760> got<01:05:26.000> to<01:05:26.160> know<01:05:26.400> me

talk to me or got to know me

talk to me or got to know me
there<01:05:28.319> was<01:05:28.640> kind<01:05:28.880> of<01:05:29.039> some<01:05:29.280> spark<01:05:29.680> there

there was kind of some spark there

there was kind of some spark there
but<01:05:30.799> we<01:05:31.039> have<01:05:31.200> been<01:05:31.440> so<01:05:31.760> conditioned

but we have been so conditioned

but we have been so conditioned
to<01:05:33.280> just<01:05:33.760> what's<01:05:34.079> on<01:05:34.160> the<01:05:34.400> outside<01:05:35.039> and<01:05:35.200> let's

to just what's on the outside and let's

to just what's on the outside and let's
face<01:05:35.760> it<01:05:36.240> i<01:05:36.480> am<01:05:36.640> not

face it i am not

face it i am not
a<01:05:38.000> gym<01:05:38.240> bunny<01:05:38.640> in<01:05:38.880> my<01:05:39.119> 20s<01:05:39.520> that<01:05:39.680> lives<01:05:40.000> at<01:05:40.079> the

a gym bunny in my 20s that lives at the

a gym bunny in my 20s that lives at the
gym

gym

gym
that's<01:05:41.520> not<01:05:41.839> me

that's not me

that's not me
i<01:05:44.000> rarely<01:05:44.880> ever

i rarely ever

i rarely ever
start<01:05:46.160> with<01:05:46.319> gay

start with gay

start with gay
i<01:05:47.280> think<01:05:47.520> because<01:05:47.920> that's

i think because that's

i think because that's
that<01:05:48.960> is<01:05:49.039> how<01:05:49.200> i<01:05:49.280> identify<01:05:49.920> but<01:05:50.160> i<01:05:50.240> don't<01:05:50.400> think

that is how i identify but i don't think

that is how i identify but i don't think
that<01:05:51.039> starting<01:05:51.440> off

that starting off

that starting off
you<01:05:52.640> know<01:05:52.960> i<01:05:53.039> think<01:05:53.200> in<01:05:53.280> our<01:05:53.440> culture<01:05:53.760> starting

you know i think in our culture starting

you know i think in our culture starting
off<01:05:54.400> with

off with

off with
uh<01:05:55.680> assigned<01:05:56.160> sexuality<01:05:57.359> um<01:05:57.839> self-imposed

uh assigned sexuality um self-imposed

uh assigned sexuality um self-imposed
uh<01:05:59.920> identity<01:06:00.319> in<01:06:00.400> that<01:06:00.640> way<01:06:01.359> only<01:06:01.680> feeds<01:06:02.079> into

uh identity in that way only feeds into

uh identity in that way only feeds into
the<01:06:02.720> stigma<01:06:03.520> listen<01:06:03.839> stands<01:06:04.079> for<01:06:04.160> the<01:06:04.240> gay

the stigma listen stands for the gay

the stigma listen stands for the gay
lesbian<01:06:04.880> straight<01:06:05.200> education<01:06:05.680> network<01:06:06.400> it<01:06:06.559> is

lesbian straight education network it is

lesbian straight education network it is
the<01:06:06.799> country's<01:06:07.440> largest<01:06:08.160> anti-bullying

the country's largest anti-bullying

the country's largest anti-bullying
organization

organization

organization
the<01:06:10.960> way<01:06:11.200> it<01:06:11.280> works<01:06:11.440> the<01:06:11.599> glsen<01:06:12.480> national<01:06:12.880> is

the way it works the glsen national is

the way it works the glsen national is
located<01:06:13.359> here<01:06:13.520> in<01:06:13.599> new<01:06:13.760> york<01:06:14.319> and<01:06:14.720> it<01:06:14.960> is<01:06:15.039> the

located here in new york and it is the

located here in new york and it is the
umbrella<01:06:15.839> for<01:06:16.319> volunteer<01:06:17.039> grassroots

umbrella for volunteer grassroots

umbrella for volunteer grassroots
movement<01:06:19.359> so<01:06:19.680> any

movement so any

movement so any
person<01:06:21.359> like<01:06:21.520> myself<01:06:22.000> and<01:06:22.160> everyday<01:06:22.559> new

person like myself and everyday new

person like myself and everyday new
yorker<01:06:23.359> can<01:06:23.599> start<01:06:23.839> a<01:06:23.920> chapter<01:06:24.480> uh<01:06:24.720> five<01:06:24.960> years

yorker can start a chapter uh five years

yorker can start a chapter uh five years
ago<01:06:25.359> i<01:06:25.440> wanted<01:06:25.680> to<01:06:25.760> just<01:06:25.920> volunteer<01:06:26.400> for<01:06:26.559> the

ago i wanted to just volunteer for the

ago i wanted to just volunteer for the
cause<01:06:27.280> i<01:06:27.520> called<01:06:27.760> glsen

cause i called glsen

cause i called glsen
i<01:06:28.880> asked<01:06:29.280> how<01:06:29.520> i<01:06:29.599> could<01:06:29.760> volunteer<01:06:30.400> they

i asked how i could volunteer they

i asked how i could volunteer they
informed<01:06:30.880> me<01:06:30.960> there<01:06:31.119> was<01:06:31.280> no<01:06:31.440> new<01:06:31.599> york<01:06:31.760> city

informed me there was no new york city

informed me there was no new york city
chapter<01:06:32.480> which<01:06:32.720> i<01:06:32.880> was<01:06:33.359> floored<01:06:33.680> by<01:06:34.240> they<01:06:34.400> said

chapter which i was floored by they said

chapter which i was floored by they said
you<01:06:34.720> can<01:06:34.880> start<01:06:35.200> one

you can start one

you can start one
had<01:06:36.319> i<01:06:36.400> realized<01:06:36.799> what<01:06:37.039> work<01:06:37.280> that<01:06:37.440> was<01:06:37.680> at

had i realized what work that was at

had i realized what work that was at
that<01:06:38.000> time<01:06:38.240> i<01:06:38.319> don't<01:06:38.480> know<01:06:38.559> if<01:06:38.720> i<01:06:38.799> would<01:06:38.960> have

that time i don't know if i would have

that time i don't know if i would have
agreed<01:06:39.440> but<01:06:39.599> i'm<01:06:39.760> glad<01:06:39.920> that<01:06:40.079> i<01:06:40.160> have<01:06:40.799> so<01:06:41.039> i

agreed but i'm glad that i have so i

agreed but i'm glad that i have so i
assembled<01:06:41.520> the<01:06:41.680> board<01:06:42.319> of<01:06:42.400> volunteers<01:06:43.359> we

assembled the board of volunteers we

assembled the board of volunteers we
were<01:06:43.920> accredited

were accredited

were accredited
and<01:06:45.520> we<01:06:45.680> started<01:06:45.920> down<01:06:46.079> our<01:06:46.240> journey<01:06:46.720> i've

and we started down our journey i've

and we started down our journey i've
stepped<01:06:47.200> down<01:06:47.440> as<01:06:47.599> chair<01:06:47.839> of<01:06:47.920> the<01:06:48.000> board<01:06:48.640> and

stepped down as chair of the board and

stepped down as chair of the board and
i've<01:06:48.960> now<01:06:49.200> assumed<01:06:49.920> director<01:06:50.400> of<01:06:50.480> educated

i've now assumed director of educated

i've now assumed director of educated
programming

programming

programming
which<01:06:52.480> means<01:06:52.720> that<01:06:52.799> i<01:06:52.960> bring<01:06:53.680> safe<01:06:54.000> space

which means that i bring safe space

which means that i bring safe space
professional<01:06:55.599> development<01:06:56.000> workshops<01:06:56.640> into

professional development workshops into

professional development workshops into
schools<01:06:57.520> for<01:06:58.240> educators<01:06:58.799> and<01:06:58.960> parents<01:06:59.359> the

schools for educators and parents the

schools for educators and parents the
conversations<01:07:00.160> have<01:07:00.240> grown<01:07:00.559> since<01:07:01.119> listen

conversations have grown since listen

conversations have grown since listen
nyc<01:07:02.079> has<01:07:02.160> been<01:07:02.319> around<01:07:02.960> uh<01:07:03.200> exponentially<01:07:04.240> uh

nyc has been around uh exponentially uh

nyc has been around uh exponentially uh
there<01:07:04.559> was<01:07:04.640> nobody<01:07:05.039> representing<01:07:05.599> the

there was nobody representing the

there was nobody representing the
students<01:07:06.480> there<01:07:06.640> was<01:07:06.799> nobody<01:07:07.280> bringing

students there was nobody bringing

students there was nobody bringing
you<01:07:08.400> know<01:07:08.640> comprehensive<01:07:09.440> training<01:07:09.760> for

you know comprehensive training for

you know comprehensive training for
educators<01:07:10.640> into<01:07:10.880> the<01:07:10.960> schools

educators into the schools

educators into the schools
to

to

to
teach<01:07:13.119> them<01:07:13.280> how<01:07:13.440> to<01:07:13.520> talk<01:07:13.760> about<01:07:14.160> different

teach them how to talk about different

teach them how to talk about different
forms<01:07:14.720> of<01:07:14.880> bias

forms of bias

forms of bias
to<01:07:16.000> teach<01:07:16.240> them<01:07:16.400> about<01:07:16.880> identity<01:07:17.760> uh

to teach them about identity uh

to teach them about identity uh
assignment<01:07:19.119> and<01:07:19.200> who<01:07:19.440> assigns<01:07:19.839> identity<01:07:20.640> i

assignment and who assigns identity i

assignment and who assigns identity i
mean<01:07:21.039> ideally

mean ideally

mean ideally
you<01:07:22.559> know<01:07:22.640> we<01:07:22.880> all<01:07:23.200> assign<01:07:23.599> ourselves<01:07:24.000> an

you know we all assign ourselves an

you know we all assign ourselves an
identity<01:07:24.480> but<01:07:24.559> we<01:07:24.640> all<01:07:24.799> know<01:07:25.039> that's<01:07:25.280> not<01:07:25.359> what

identity but we all know that's not what

identity but we all know that's not what
happens

happens

happens
um<01:07:27.039> in<01:07:27.200> sixth<01:07:27.520> grade<01:07:27.680> when<01:07:27.920> i<01:07:28.000> showed<01:07:28.240> up<01:07:28.480> as<01:07:28.640> a

um in sixth grade when i showed up as a

um in sixth grade when i showed up as a
dancer<01:07:29.119> as<01:07:29.200> a<01:07:29.280> tapping<01:07:29.599> jab<01:07:30.240> jazz<01:07:30.559> dancer<01:07:30.960> in

dancer as a tapping jab jazz dancer in

dancer as a tapping jab jazz dancer in
junior<01:07:31.359> high

junior high

junior high
and<01:07:32.480> all<01:07:32.559> the<01:07:32.720> kids<01:07:33.039> called<01:07:33.280> me<01:07:33.440> femme<01:07:33.760> and

and all the kids called me femme and

and all the kids called me femme and
i<01:07:34.880> hadn't<01:07:35.119> come<01:07:35.359> out<01:07:35.440> yet<01:07:35.920> and<01:07:36.079> they<01:07:36.240> had

i hadn't come out yet and they had

i hadn't come out yet and they had
imposed<01:07:37.039> that<01:07:37.200> identity<01:07:37.680> on<01:07:37.839> to<01:07:38.000> me<01:07:38.160> in<01:07:38.400> a

imposed that identity on to me in a

imposed that identity on to me in a
violent<01:07:38.880> way

violent way

violent way
so<01:07:40.240> i<01:07:40.400> still<01:07:40.640> see<01:07:40.799> that<01:07:40.960> happening<01:07:41.920> uh<01:07:42.079> the

so i still see that happening uh the

so i still see that happening uh the
conversation

conversation

conversation
has<01:07:43.920> stopped<01:07:44.319> since<01:07:44.559> the<01:07:44.799> boom<01:07:45.200> of<01:07:45.680> you<01:07:45.839> know

has stopped since the boom of you know

has stopped since the boom of you know
the<01:07:46.079> bullying<01:07:46.480> movement<01:07:46.880> kind<01:07:46.960> of<01:07:47.200> swelled<01:07:47.680> up

the bullying movement kind of swelled up

the bullying movement kind of swelled up
and<01:07:48.480> the<01:07:48.559> movie<01:07:48.880> bully<01:07:49.200> came<01:07:49.440> out<01:07:50.079> and<01:07:50.319> i<01:07:50.400> think

and the movie bully came out and i think

and the movie bully came out and i think
we<01:07:50.640> have<01:07:50.799> kind<01:07:50.960> of<01:07:51.119> simmered<01:07:51.440> down<01:07:51.680> a<01:07:51.760> little

we have kind of simmered down a little

we have kind of simmered down a little
bit<01:07:52.400> so<01:07:52.559> it's<01:07:52.720> my<01:07:52.880> job<01:07:53.119> to<01:07:53.200> keep<01:07:53.359> that

bit so it's my job to keep that

bit so it's my job to keep that
conversation<01:07:54.160> going<01:07:54.480> in<01:07:54.640> schools<01:07:55.119> and<01:07:55.280> to

conversation going in schools and to

conversation going in schools and to
enlighten

enlighten

enlighten
all<01:07:56.720> of<01:07:56.799> the<01:07:56.960> educators<01:07:57.520> that<01:07:57.599> there<01:07:57.839> is

all of the educators that there is

all of the educators that there is
additional<01:07:58.400> help<01:07:59.039> that<01:07:59.359> not<01:07:59.599> talking<01:08:00.000> about

additional help that not talking about

additional help that not talking about
it<01:08:00.480> is<01:08:00.640> actually<01:08:00.960> a<01:08:01.119> form<01:08:01.920> of<01:08:02.240> ignorance

it is actually a form of ignorance

it is actually a form of ignorance
because<01:08:03.599> when<01:08:03.920> lgbtq<01:08:04.960> people<01:08:05.359> do<01:08:05.520> not<01:08:05.680> see

because when lgbtq people do not see

because when lgbtq people do not see
themselves<01:08:06.240> represented<01:08:06.799> in<01:08:06.880> history<01:08:07.280> books

themselves represented in history books

themselves represented in history books
do<01:08:08.079> not<01:08:08.319> hear<01:08:08.559> the<01:08:08.720> terms<01:08:09.440> do<01:08:09.599> not<01:08:09.839> see<01:08:10.000> a<01:08:10.079> gsa

do not hear the terms do not see a gsa

do not hear the terms do not see a gsa
do<01:08:11.200> not<01:08:11.359> have<01:08:11.760> an<01:08:12.000> ally<01:08:12.640> in<01:08:13.119> educators<01:08:14.000> they

do not have an ally in educators they

do not have an ally in educators they
are<01:08:14.319> pretty<01:08:14.480> much<01:08:14.720> told<01:08:14.960> they<01:08:15.039> don't<01:08:15.280> count

are pretty much told they don't count

are pretty much told they don't count
and<01:08:16.000> then<01:08:16.319> that<01:08:16.560> gives<01:08:17.040> license<01:08:17.440> to<01:08:17.679> any

and then that gives license to any

and then that gives license to any
straight<01:08:18.480> identified<01:08:19.120> student<01:08:19.759> to<01:08:20.000> impose

straight identified student to impose

straight identified student to impose
violence<01:08:21.120> or<01:08:21.520> homophobia<01:08:22.799> in<01:08:22.960> some<01:08:23.120> way<01:08:23.279> shape

violence or homophobia in some way shape

violence or homophobia in some way shape
or<01:08:23.600> form<01:08:24.000> it<01:08:24.080> says<01:08:24.319> it's<01:08:24.480> okay<01:08:24.960> because<01:08:25.199> we

or form it says it's okay because we

or form it says it's okay because we
don't<01:08:25.600> count<01:08:26.080> so<01:08:26.159> let's<01:08:26.400> take<01:08:26.640> the<01:08:26.719> term<01:08:27.040> man

don't count so let's take the term man

don't count so let's take the term man
up<01:08:28.000> which<01:08:28.239> is<01:08:28.719> so<01:08:28.960> widely<01:08:29.359> used<01:08:29.600> especially<01:08:30.000> in

up which is so widely used especially in

up which is so widely used especially in
athletics<01:08:31.120> which<01:08:31.520> is<01:08:31.679> not<01:08:31.920> only<01:08:32.640> can<01:08:32.799> be

athletics which is not only can be

athletics which is not only can be
miscreated<01:08:33.839> as<01:08:33.920> homophobic<01:08:34.960> and<01:08:35.279> be<01:08:35.520> damaging

miscreated as homophobic and be damaging

miscreated as homophobic and be damaging
to<01:08:36.159> somebody<01:08:36.480> who's<01:08:36.640> lgbtq<01:08:37.759> it's<01:08:37.920> also<01:08:38.239> sexist

to somebody who's lgbtq it's also sexist

to somebody who's lgbtq it's also sexist
especially<01:08:39.440> when<01:08:39.600> i<01:08:39.759> hear<01:08:40.080> uh<01:08:40.400> female

especially when i hear uh female

especially when i hear uh female
educators<01:08:41.279> use<01:08:41.520> it

educators use it

educators use it
uh<01:08:42.400> what<01:08:42.560> does<01:08:42.719> man<01:08:43.040> up<01:08:43.199> mean<01:08:43.440> what<01:08:43.600> are<01:08:43.679> we

uh what does man up mean what are we

uh what does man up mean what are we
manning<01:08:44.159> up<01:08:44.319> to

manning up to

manning up to
uh<01:08:45.520> so<01:08:45.679> that's<01:08:45.920> some<01:08:46.080> of<01:08:46.159> the<01:08:46.319> language<01:08:46.719> that<01:08:46.880> i

uh so that's some of the language that i

uh so that's some of the language that i
think<01:08:47.120> needs<01:08:47.359> to<01:08:47.440> be<01:08:47.600> taken<01:08:47.920> out<01:08:48.159> of<01:08:48.319> the

think needs to be taken out of the

think needs to be taken out of the
everyday<01:08:48.880> vernacular<01:08:49.520> in<01:08:49.679> our<01:08:49.759> schools

everyday vernacular in our schools

everyday vernacular in our schools
that's<01:08:50.960> okay<01:08:51.759> you<01:08:51.839> know<01:08:52.000> i'm<01:08:52.080> part<01:08:52.239> of<01:08:52.319> the

that's okay you know i'm part of the

that's okay you know i'm part of the
that's<01:08:52.640> so<01:08:52.880> gay<01:08:53.120> campaign<01:08:54.159> uh<01:08:54.400> you<01:08:54.560> never<01:08:54.719> know

that's so gay campaign uh you never know

that's so gay campaign uh you never know
who's<01:08:55.120> listening<01:08:55.679> and<01:08:55.839> we<01:08:55.920> need<01:08:56.080> to<01:08:56.159> take

who's listening and we need to take

who's listening and we need to take
phrases<01:08:56.960> like<01:08:57.199> that<01:08:57.440> out

phrases like that out

phrases like that out
of<01:08:58.480> our<01:08:58.640> everyday<01:08:59.120> use<01:08:59.679> um<01:09:00.000> because<01:09:00.159> that's

of our everyday use um because that's

of our everyday use um because that's
not<01:09:00.480> really<01:09:00.719> what<01:09:00.880> they<01:09:01.040> mean<01:09:01.520> students<01:09:02.000> right

not really what they mean students right

not really what they mean students right
young<01:09:03.279> people<01:09:04.080> they<01:09:04.239> always<01:09:04.480> say<01:09:04.640> that<01:09:04.880> they

young people they always say that they

young people they always say that they
mean<01:09:05.199> that's<01:09:05.440> stupid

mean that's stupid

mean that's stupid
um<01:09:07.279> but<01:09:07.440> they<01:09:08.000> they<01:09:08.319> they<01:09:08.480> need<01:09:08.640> to<01:09:08.719> find<01:09:08.960> a

um but they they they need to find a

um but they they they need to find a
different<01:09:09.279> way<01:09:09.440> to<01:09:09.520> say<01:09:09.759> it

different way to say it

different way to say it
the<01:09:10.719> alley<01:09:10.960> fournette<01:09:11.279> center<01:09:11.759> is<01:09:12.000> the

the alley fournette center is the

the alley fournette center is the
nation's<01:09:12.480> largest<01:09:12.960> organization<01:09:13.679> dedicated

nation's largest organization dedicated

nation's largest organization dedicated
to<01:09:14.319> homeless<01:09:14.799> lgbt<01:09:15.440> youth<01:09:15.920> we're<01:09:16.080> not<01:09:16.319> just

to homeless lgbt youth we're not just

to homeless lgbt youth we're not just
trying<01:09:16.640> to<01:09:16.719> give<01:09:16.799> them<01:09:17.040> a<01:09:17.120> place<01:09:17.279> to<01:09:17.440> sleep<01:09:17.759> at

trying to give them a place to sleep at

trying to give them a place to sleep at
night<01:09:18.480> we're<01:09:18.640> trying<01:09:18.799> to<01:09:18.880> make<01:09:19.040> sure<01:09:19.199> that

night we're trying to make sure that

night we're trying to make sure that
they're<01:09:19.600> safe<01:09:19.920> we're<01:09:20.080> trying<01:09:20.239> to<01:09:20.319> make<01:09:20.480> sure

they're safe we're trying to make sure

they're safe we're trying to make sure
that<01:09:20.719> they're<01:09:21.040> healthy<01:09:21.839> we're<01:09:22.080> working<01:09:22.400> with

that they're healthy we're working with

that they're healthy we're working with
them<01:09:22.799> to

them to

them to
figure<01:09:24.560> out<01:09:25.120> what<01:09:25.440> life<01:09:25.759> is<01:09:25.839> going<01:09:26.000> to<01:09:26.080> look

figure out what life is going to look

figure out what life is going to look
like<01:09:26.400> for<01:09:26.560> them<01:09:27.199> off<01:09:27.440> the<01:09:27.679> streets<01:09:28.239> you<01:09:28.319> know

like for them off the streets you know

like for them off the streets you know
what<01:09:28.560> their<01:09:28.799> plan<01:09:29.120> is<01:09:29.279> to<01:09:29.440> get<01:09:29.600> off<01:09:29.839> the

what their plan is to get off the

what their plan is to get off the
streets

streets

streets
we<01:09:31.120> work<01:09:31.279> with<01:09:31.440> them<01:09:31.600> to<01:09:31.679> get<01:09:31.759> the<01:09:31.920> skills<01:09:32.400> they

we work with them to get the skills they

we work with them to get the skills they
need<01:09:32.799> to<01:09:32.880> get<01:09:33.120> off<01:09:33.279> the<01:09:33.440> streets<01:09:33.839> to<01:09:34.000> get<01:09:34.239> jobs

need to get off the streets to get jobs

need to get off the streets to get jobs
to<01:09:34.799> get<01:09:34.960> education

to get education

to get education
we're<01:09:36.880> providing<01:09:37.279> them<01:09:37.440> with<01:09:37.520> mental<01:09:37.839> health

we're providing them with mental health

we're providing them with mental health
treatment<01:09:38.640> alif<01:09:38.960> renee<01:09:39.279> was<01:09:39.440> a<01:09:39.520> gender

treatment alif renee was a gender

treatment alif renee was a gender
non-conforming<01:09:40.719> youth<01:09:41.120> that<01:09:41.279> i<01:09:41.600> met<01:09:42.080> the

non-conforming youth that i met the

non-conforming youth that i met the
first<01:09:42.560> day<01:09:42.799> i<01:09:42.960> started<01:09:43.279> working<01:09:43.520> with

first day i started working with

first day i started working with
homeless<01:09:44.080> youth<01:09:44.400> back<01:09:44.640> in<01:09:44.719> 1994

homeless youth back in 1994

homeless youth back in 1994
ali<01:09:47.120> was<01:09:47.600> in<01:09:47.679> a<01:09:47.759> lot<01:09:47.920> of<01:09:48.000> ways<01:09:48.159> really

ali was in a lot of ways really

ali was in a lot of ways really
remarkable<01:09:49.120> person

remarkable person

remarkable person
ali<01:09:50.560> was<01:09:51.040> very<01:09:51.359> very<01:09:51.839> effeminate<01:09:53.040> grew<01:09:53.199> up<01:09:53.359> in

ali was very very effeminate grew up in

ali was very very effeminate grew up in
a<01:09:53.520> really<01:09:53.759> rough<01:09:54.000> housing<01:09:54.400> project<01:09:55.040> in<01:09:55.440> east

a really rough housing project in east

a really rough housing project in east
new<01:09:55.920> york<01:09:56.640> in<01:09:56.800> the<01:09:56.880> 80s<01:09:57.520> when<01:09:58.000> like<01:09:58.239> that<01:09:58.400> was

new york in the 80s when like that was

new york in the 80s when like that was
just<01:09:58.800> a<01:09:58.880> really<01:09:59.360> really<01:09:59.840> rough<01:10:00.239> place<01:10:00.480> to<01:10:00.640> be

just a really really rough place to be

just a really really rough place to be
living<01:10:01.920> the<01:10:02.000> other<01:10:02.159> kids<01:10:02.400> in<01:10:02.480> the<01:10:02.640> project

living the other kids in the project

living the other kids in the project
would<01:10:03.679> chase<01:10:04.000> him<01:10:04.159> and<01:10:04.320> beat<01:10:04.560> him<01:10:04.719> up<01:10:05.120> and

would chase him and beat him up and

would chase him and beat him up and
ollie's<01:10:06.000> mother<01:10:06.320> who

ollie's mother who

ollie's mother who
was<01:10:07.679> dealing<01:10:08.000> with<01:10:08.239> drug<01:10:08.480> addiction<01:10:08.960> just

was dealing with drug addiction just

was dealing with drug addiction just
didn't<01:10:09.360> know<01:10:09.440> how<01:10:09.600> to<01:10:09.679> deal<01:10:10.000> with<01:10:10.159> the<01:10:10.320> whole

didn't know how to deal with the whole

didn't know how to deal with the whole
situation<01:10:11.280> and

situation and

situation and
she<01:10:12.400> put<01:10:12.560> him<01:10:12.719> out<01:10:12.800> when<01:10:12.960> he<01:10:13.040> was<01:10:13.199> 13

she put him out when he was 13

she put him out when he was 13
and<01:10:14.840> ali<01:10:16.159> was<01:10:16.640> in<01:10:16.800> and<01:10:16.960> out<01:10:17.040> of<01:10:17.440> foster<01:10:17.920> care

and ali was in and out of foster care

and ali was in and out of foster care
kept<01:10:18.400> getting<01:10:18.719> beaten<01:10:19.040> up<01:10:19.199> and<01:10:19.520> bullied<01:10:19.920> and

kept getting beaten up and bullied and

kept getting beaten up and bullied and
harassed<01:10:20.560> in<01:10:20.719> foster<01:10:21.199> care

harassed in foster care

harassed in foster care
my<01:10:22.560> recollection<01:10:23.040> as<01:10:23.199> ali<01:10:23.520> was<01:10:23.600> in<01:10:23.760> about<01:10:24.000> 16

my recollection as ali was in about 16

my recollection as ali was in about 16
different<01:10:24.719> foster<01:10:25.120> care<01:10:25.360> placements<01:10:25.920> over

different foster care placements over

different foster care placements over
the<01:10:26.159> next<01:10:26.400> few<01:10:26.640> years

the next few years

the next few years
and<01:10:28.159> by<01:10:28.320> the<01:10:28.480> time<01:10:28.800> ali<01:10:29.199> was<01:10:29.199> was

15 16 they were really just out there

15 16 they were really just out there
homeless<01:10:34.480> in<01:10:34.560> the<01:10:34.640> streets

homeless in the streets

homeless in the streets
and<01:10:36.719> i

and i

and i
met<01:10:38.320> ali<01:10:38.800> when<01:10:39.120> when<01:10:39.360> ali<01:10:39.679> was

met ali when when ali was

met ali when when ali was
19<01:10:41.520> in<01:10:41.760> 1994

19 in 1994

19 in 1994
ali<01:10:44.719> was<01:10:44.880> murdered<01:10:45.360> in<01:10:45.440> harlem<01:10:46.400> in<01:10:46.880> december

ali was murdered in harlem in december

ali was murdered in harlem in december
of<01:10:47.520> 1997

of 1997

of 1997
and<01:10:49.840> i<01:10:50.000> was<01:10:50.400> just<01:10:50.719> totally<01:10:51.280> devastated<01:10:51.920> by

and i was just totally devastated by

and i was just totally devastated by
that<01:10:52.719> ali<01:10:53.360> was<01:10:53.600> just<01:10:53.760> somebody<01:10:54.080> i<01:10:54.480> really

that ali was just somebody i really

that ali was just somebody i really
admired

admired

admired
really<01:10:56.880> loved<01:10:57.360> really<01:10:57.600> cared<01:10:57.920> about

really loved really cared about

really loved really cared about
um

and uh

and uh
i<01:11:03.920> was<01:11:04.159> actually<01:11:04.480> so<01:11:05.199> devastated<01:11:06.080> when<01:11:06.320> ali

i was actually so devastated when ali

i was actually so devastated when ali
was<01:11:06.880> killed<01:11:07.280> that<01:11:07.440> i<01:11:07.679> thought<01:11:08.000> about<01:11:08.480> quitting

was killed that i thought about quitting

was killed that i thought about quitting
like<01:11:09.760> i<01:11:09.840> just

like i just

like i just
couldn't<01:11:12.159> cope<01:11:12.719> with<01:11:13.120> all<01:11:13.280> these<01:11:13.520> murders<01:11:13.920> and

couldn't cope with all these murders and

couldn't cope with all these murders and
all<01:11:14.159> these<01:11:14.480> deaths<01:11:14.960> and<01:11:15.120> burying<01:11:15.679> kids

all these deaths and burying kids

all these deaths and burying kids
and

and

and
sending<01:11:18.560> my<01:11:18.800> staff<01:11:19.120> to<01:11:19.280> the<01:11:19.440> morgue<01:11:19.840> to

sending my staff to the morgue to

sending my staff to the morgue to
identify<01:11:20.880> the

identify the

identify the
murdered<01:11:22.239> bodies<01:11:22.719> of<01:11:22.880> our<01:11:23.040> kids<01:11:23.840> but<01:11:24.080> instead

murdered bodies of our kids but instead

murdered bodies of our kids but instead
like<01:11:25.040> you<01:11:25.120> know<01:11:25.199> whatever<01:11:25.600> faith<01:11:25.920> i<01:11:26.080> had<01:11:26.560> you

like you know whatever faith i had you

like you know whatever faith i had you
know<01:11:26.800> it<01:11:26.960> just<01:11:27.040> kind<01:11:27.199> of<01:11:27.280> came<01:11:27.520> to<01:11:27.600> the<01:11:27.760> fore

know it just kind of came to the fore

know it just kind of came to the fore
and<01:11:28.239> i<01:11:28.400> felt<01:11:28.640> like<01:11:29.360> what<01:11:29.520> i<01:11:29.600> was<01:11:29.840> called<01:11:30.080> to<01:11:30.159> do

and i felt like what i was called to do

and i felt like what i was called to do
was<01:11:30.719> was<01:11:30.960> to<01:11:31.120> really<01:11:31.440> fight<01:11:32.080> to

was was to really fight to

was was to really fight to
better<01:11:34.159> protect<01:11:34.640> the<01:11:35.120> young<01:11:35.360> people<01:11:36.000> it's<01:11:36.480> a

better protect the young people it's a

better protect the young people it's a
terrible<01:11:37.199> thing<01:11:37.760> when<01:11:38.159> when<01:11:38.480> young<01:11:38.719> people

terrible thing when when young people

terrible thing when when young people
are<01:11:39.600> driven<01:11:40.000> from<01:11:40.159> their<01:11:40.320> homes<01:11:40.719> because

are driven from their homes because

are driven from their homes because
their<01:11:41.199> parents<01:11:41.679> can't<01:11:41.920> accept<01:11:42.320> them

their parents can't accept them

their parents can't accept them
and<01:11:43.520> so<01:11:44.000> that's<01:11:44.239> going<01:11:44.320> to<01:11:44.400> be<01:11:44.560> a<01:11:44.640> wound<01:11:45.040> that

and so that's going to be a wound that

and so that's going to be a wound that
they're<01:11:45.360> going<01:11:45.440> to<01:11:45.600> have<01:11:45.679> to<01:11:45.840> carry<01:11:46.320> all<01:11:46.400> their

they're going to have to carry all their

they're going to have to carry all their
lives<01:11:47.280> i<01:11:47.360> mean<01:11:47.520> to<01:11:47.600> be<01:11:47.679> rejected<01:11:48.159> by<01:11:48.320> your

lives i mean to be rejected by your

lives i mean to be rejected by your
family<01:11:48.800> and<01:11:48.880> put<01:11:49.120> out<01:11:49.199> in<01:11:49.280> the<01:11:49.360> street<01:11:49.840> is

family and put out in the street is

family and put out in the street is
something<01:11:50.640> that<01:11:50.880> is

something that is

something that is
that's<01:11:52.400> a<01:11:52.480> scar<01:11:52.880> that's<01:11:53.199> that's<01:11:53.520> never<01:11:53.760> going

that's a scar that's that's never going

that's a scar that's that's never going
to<01:11:54.000> heal

to heal

to heal
carrying<01:11:55.600> the<01:11:55.920> the<01:11:56.159> hurt<01:11:56.560> of<01:11:56.719> being<01:11:57.199> cast<01:11:57.600> out

carrying the the hurt of being cast out

carrying the the hurt of being cast out
of<01:11:57.840> your<01:11:58.000> home<01:11:58.239> and<01:11:58.320> rejected<01:11:58.800> by<01:11:58.960> your<01:11:59.199> family

of your home and rejected by your family

of your home and rejected by your family
combined<01:12:00.960> with<01:12:01.199> like

combined with like

combined with like
you<01:12:02.560> know<01:12:03.120> being<01:12:03.520> hungry<01:12:04.239> being<01:12:04.719> scared<01:12:05.840> being

you know being hungry being scared being

you know being hungry being scared being
cold<01:12:06.640> at<01:12:06.800> night<01:12:07.520> not<01:12:07.679> knowing<01:12:08.000> where<01:12:08.159> to<01:12:08.400> sleep

cold at night not knowing where to sleep

cold at night not knowing where to sleep
not<01:12:09.520> knowing<01:12:09.679> where<01:12:09.840> to<01:12:10.000> go<01:12:10.080> to<01:12:10.159> the<01:12:10.320> bathroom

it's overwhelming and a lot of kids have

it's overwhelming and a lot of kids have
talked<01:12:16.320> to<01:12:16.480> me<01:12:16.719> about<01:12:17.199> their<01:12:17.440> suicide

talked to me about their suicide

talked to me about their suicide
attempts

attempts

attempts
i<01:12:20.320> think<01:12:20.480> you're<01:12:20.719> a<01:12:20.800> hero<01:12:21.120> when<01:12:21.280> you<01:12:21.440> stand<01:12:21.840> up

i think you're a hero when you stand up

i think you're a hero when you stand up
for<01:12:22.239> truth<01:12:23.120> and<01:12:23.600> these<01:12:24.000> young<01:12:24.239> people<01:12:24.880> are

for truth and these young people are

for truth and these young people are
standing<01:12:25.360> up<01:12:25.520> for<01:12:25.679> the<01:12:25.760> truth<01:12:26.159> of<01:12:26.239> who<01:12:26.400> they

standing up for the truth of who they

standing up for the truth of who they
are<01:12:26.960> i<01:12:27.040> guess<01:12:27.280> the<01:12:27.520> label<01:12:27.920> that<01:12:28.159> i<01:12:28.320> use<01:12:28.640> the

are i guess the label that i use the

are i guess the label that i use the
most<01:12:29.120> to<01:12:29.280> identify<01:12:29.840> myself<01:12:30.480> is<01:12:30.880> a<01:12:31.040> civil

most to identify myself is a civil

most to identify myself is a civil
rights<01:12:31.600> attorney<01:12:32.239> i

rights attorney i

rights attorney i
like<01:12:33.440> to<01:12:33.600> stand<01:12:34.000> up<01:12:34.239> for<01:12:34.880> the<01:12:35.280> little<01:12:35.600> guy<01:12:36.080> and

like to stand up for the little guy and

like to stand up for the little guy and
the<01:12:37.040> slogan<01:12:37.520> for<01:12:37.679> our<01:12:37.920> law<01:12:38.159> firm<01:12:38.400> is<01:12:38.640> champions

the slogan for our law firm is champions

the slogan for our law firm is champions
of<01:12:39.199> the<01:12:39.440> underrepresented

of the underrepresented

of the underrepresented
and<01:12:41.120> so<01:12:41.280> i've<01:12:41.440> always<01:12:41.679> been<01:12:41.840> drawn<01:12:42.080> to<01:12:42.239> trying

and so i've always been drawn to trying

and so i've always been drawn to trying
to<01:12:43.280> fight<01:12:43.520> for<01:12:44.159> others<01:12:44.800> and<01:12:44.960> and<01:12:45.199> to<01:12:45.360> connect

to fight for others and and to connect

to fight for others and and to connect
the<01:12:45.840> dots<01:12:46.159> and<01:12:46.320> understand

the dots and understand

the dots and understand
how

how

how
different<01:12:49.199> people's<01:12:49.600> ways<01:12:49.920> of<01:12:50.080> being<01:12:50.480> need<01:12:50.719> to

different people's ways of being need to

different people's ways of being need to
be<01:12:50.960> respected<01:12:51.600> and<01:12:51.679> how<01:12:51.840> we<01:12:52.480> should<01:12:52.800> um<01:12:53.280> kind

be respected and how we should um kind

be respected and how we should um kind
of

of

of
relate<01:12:54.800> and<01:12:54.960> respect<01:12:55.360> and<01:12:55.520> understand<01:12:56.000> people

relate and respect and understand people

relate and respect and understand people
better<01:12:56.560> and<01:12:56.640> maybe<01:12:56.880> that's<01:12:57.199> because

better and maybe that's because

better and maybe that's because
of<01:12:58.239> my<01:12:58.480> own<01:12:59.120> process<01:12:59.679> personally<01:13:00.239> to<01:13:00.400> have

of my own process personally to have

of my own process personally to have
that<01:13:01.199> for<01:13:01.360> me

that for me

that for me
um<01:13:02.719> and<01:13:02.960> so<01:13:03.360> you<01:13:03.520> know<01:13:03.679> i've<01:13:03.920> been<01:13:04.159> an<01:13:04.560> activist

um and so you know i've been an activist

um and so you know i've been an activist
i've<01:13:05.360> been<01:13:05.600> involved<01:13:06.080> in<01:13:06.400> politics<01:13:07.520> and<01:13:07.920> um

i've been involved in politics and um

i've been involved in politics and um
civil<01:13:08.800> rights<01:13:09.040> litigation<01:13:09.520> gives<01:13:09.760> me<01:13:09.840> the

civil rights litigation gives me the

civil rights litigation gives me the
chance<01:13:10.320> to<01:13:10.480> be<01:13:10.640> able<01:13:10.880> to<01:13:11.120> advance

chance to be able to advance

chance to be able to advance
people's<01:13:13.120> rights<01:13:14.000> social<01:13:14.320> justice<01:13:14.719> movements

people's rights social justice movements

people's rights social justice movements
and<01:13:16.239> to<01:13:16.400> do<01:13:16.560> it<01:13:16.719> in<01:13:16.880> a<01:13:16.960> way<01:13:17.199> that<01:13:17.679> i<01:13:18.320> kind<01:13:18.480> of

and to do it in a way that i kind of

and to do it in a way that i kind of
define<01:13:19.040> you<01:13:19.120> know<01:13:19.199> i<01:13:19.280> can<01:13:19.440> to<01:13:19.600> a<01:13:19.679> certain

define you know i can to a certain

define you know i can to a certain
degree<01:13:20.560> pick<01:13:20.800> and<01:13:20.880> choose<01:13:21.280> the<01:13:21.360> clients<01:13:21.679> that

degree pick and choose the clients that

degree pick and choose the clients that
i<01:13:21.920> want<01:13:22.000> to<01:13:22.080> represent<01:13:22.560> the<01:13:22.640> issues<01:13:22.960> that<01:13:23.040> i

i want to represent the issues that i

i want to represent the issues that i
want<01:13:23.280> to<01:13:23.360> fight

want to fight

want to fight
for<01:13:24.719> and<01:13:25.280> if<01:13:25.520> i<01:13:25.600> do<01:13:25.760> my<01:13:25.920> job<01:13:26.239> right<01:13:26.480> to<01:13:26.640> some

for and if i do my job right to some

for and if i do my job right to some
degree<01:13:27.120> i'm<01:13:27.360> able<01:13:27.600> to<01:13:27.760> effectuate<01:13:28.320> the<01:13:28.480> change

degree i'm able to effectuate the change

degree i'm able to effectuate the change
that<01:13:28.960> happens<01:13:29.199> as<01:13:29.360> a<01:13:29.440> result<01:13:29.760> of<01:13:29.920> that

that happens as a result of that

that happens as a result of that
fundamentally<01:13:31.280> in<01:13:31.360> the<01:13:31.440> most<01:13:31.679> core<01:13:32.159> basis<01:13:32.560> of

fundamentally in the most core basis of

fundamentally in the most core basis of
humanity<01:13:33.600> all<01:13:33.760> we<01:13:33.920> want<01:13:34.159> in<01:13:34.239> the<01:13:34.400> world<01:13:34.719> is<01:13:34.880> to

humanity all we want in the world is to

humanity all we want in the world is to
see<01:13:35.360> and<01:13:35.440> be<01:13:35.679> seen<01:13:36.159> and<01:13:36.640> to<01:13:36.960> love<01:13:37.280> and<01:13:37.440> be<01:13:37.600> loved

see and be seen and to love and be loved

see and be seen and to love and be loved
and<01:13:38.400> if<01:13:38.640> you<01:13:38.800> remove<01:13:39.280> that<01:13:39.760> on<01:13:40.000> any<01:13:40.239> level<01:13:40.719> of

and if you remove that on any level of

and if you remove that on any level of
society<01:13:41.600> it<01:13:41.760> has<01:13:41.920> a<01:13:42.000> devastating<01:13:42.640> impact<01:13:43.440> on

society it has a devastating impact on

society it has a devastating impact on
humanity<01:13:44.560> and<01:13:44.719> on<01:13:44.800> the<01:13:44.880> psyche<01:13:45.679> it<01:13:45.920> also

humanity and on the psyche it also

humanity and on the psyche it also
impacts<01:13:46.640> the<01:13:46.719> day-to-day

impacts the day-to-day

impacts the day-to-day
you<01:13:47.920> know<01:13:48.320> uh<01:13:48.640> impact<01:13:49.040> of<01:13:49.199> your<01:13:49.360> life<01:13:49.679> for

you know uh impact of your life for

you know uh impact of your life for
example<01:13:50.719> you<01:13:50.800> know<01:13:51.120> uh<01:13:51.360> same-sex<01:13:51.840> couples

example you know uh same-sex couples

example you know uh same-sex couples
couldn't<01:13:52.400> get<01:13:52.560> married<01:13:52.960> that<01:13:53.120> sounds<01:13:53.440> like

couldn't get married that sounds like

couldn't get married that sounds like
you<01:13:54.239> know

you know

you know
it's<01:13:55.520> not<01:13:55.679> it's<01:13:55.760> not<01:13:55.920> just<01:13:56.080> marriage<01:13:56.480> that

it's not it's not just marriage that

it's not it's not just marriage that
impacts<01:13:57.120> it<01:13:57.280> impacts<01:13:57.760> the<01:13:57.920> ability<01:13:58.480> to

impacts it impacts the ability to

impacts it impacts the ability to
sponsor<01:13:59.679> people<01:13:59.920> for<01:14:00.080> immigration<01:14:00.800> it

sponsor people for immigration it

sponsor people for immigration it
impacts<01:14:01.520> the<01:14:01.840> ability<01:14:02.239> to<01:14:02.400> inherit<01:14:02.880> money<01:14:03.120> it

impacts the ability to inherit money it

impacts the ability to inherit money it
impacts<01:14:03.920> their<01:14:04.239> financial<01:14:05.280> well-being<01:14:06.000> their

impacts their financial well-being their

impacts their financial well-being their
ability<01:14:06.719> to<01:14:06.880> visit<01:14:07.199> people<01:14:07.840> in<01:14:08.320> hospitals<01:14:09.040> and

ability to visit people in hospitals and

ability to visit people in hospitals and
do<01:14:09.520> other<01:14:09.760> things<01:14:10.159> so

do other things so

do other things so
on<01:14:11.120> the<01:14:11.199> most<01:14:11.440> basic<01:14:11.760> level<01:14:12.080> of<01:14:12.159> day-to-day

on the most basic level of day-to-day

on the most basic level of day-to-day
living<01:14:13.520> not<01:14:13.840> having<01:14:14.320> a<01:14:14.400> representative

living not having a representative

living not having a representative
government<01:14:15.679> and<01:14:15.840> a<01:14:15.920> government<01:14:16.320> that<01:14:16.800> takes

government and a government that takes

government and a government that takes
into<01:14:17.280> consideration<01:14:18.000> all<01:14:18.320> ways<01:14:18.640> of<01:14:18.719> being<01:14:19.440> and

into consideration all ways of being and

into consideration all ways of being and
protects<01:14:20.159> everybody's<01:14:20.719> rights<01:14:21.440> really<01:14:21.760> can

protects everybody's rights really can

protects everybody's rights really can
be<01:14:22.320> devastating<01:14:23.040> what's<01:14:23.360> interesting<01:14:23.760> about

be devastating what's interesting about

be devastating what's interesting about
new<01:14:24.320> york<01:14:24.560> city<01:14:25.120> is<01:14:25.280> that<01:14:25.920> there<01:14:26.239> are<01:14:26.400> a<01:14:26.480> lot<01:14:26.640> of

new york city is that there are a lot of

new york city is that there are a lot of
really<01:14:27.360> strong

really strong

really strong
laws<01:14:29.199> that<01:14:29.440> protect<01:14:29.920> gender<01:14:30.320> and<01:14:30.480> gender

laws that protect gender and gender

laws that protect gender and gender
expression<01:14:31.600> the<01:14:31.840> problem<01:14:32.159> that<01:14:32.320> we<01:14:32.560> often<01:14:32.960> see

expression the problem that we often see

expression the problem that we often see
is<01:14:33.679> that<01:14:34.480> either

is that either

is that either
private<01:14:36.239> entities<01:14:36.800> or<01:14:36.960> sometimes<01:14:37.520> even<01:14:37.760> the

private entities or sometimes even the

private entities or sometimes even the
city<01:14:38.239> itself<01:14:39.120> doesn't<01:14:39.520> always<01:14:40.080> fully<01:14:40.480> employ

city itself doesn't always fully employ

city itself doesn't always fully employ
those<01:14:42.080> rights

those rights

those rights
and<01:14:43.600> those<01:14:43.920> laws<01:14:44.640> so<01:14:44.880> a<01:14:44.960> lot<01:14:45.120> of<01:14:45.280> times<01:14:45.600> what<01:14:45.760> we

and those laws so a lot of times what we

and those laws so a lot of times what we
have<01:14:46.080> to<01:14:46.239> do<01:14:46.400> is<01:14:46.560> make<01:14:46.800> sure<01:14:47.120> that<01:14:47.440> employers

have to do is make sure that employers

have to do is make sure that employers
or<01:14:48.960> places<01:14:49.280> where<01:14:49.440> there<01:14:49.679> are<01:14:49.840> public

or places where there are public

or places where there are public
accommodations<01:14:51.360> are<01:14:51.679> actually<01:14:52.080> respecting

accommodations are actually respecting

accommodations are actually respecting
the<01:14:52.800> rights<01:14:53.120> of<01:14:53.280> people<01:14:53.600> to<01:14:53.760> express<01:14:54.480> the

the rights of people to express the

the rights of people to express the
gender<01:14:55.040> that<01:14:55.120> they<01:14:55.360> want<01:14:55.600> to<01:14:55.840> express<01:14:56.560> for

gender that they want to express for

gender that they want to express for
those<01:14:57.040> out<01:14:57.199> there<01:14:57.760> listening<01:14:58.080> to<01:14:58.239> this

those out there listening to this

those out there listening to this
documentary<01:14:59.600> or<01:14:59.760> thinking<01:14:59.920> about<01:15:00.080> ways<01:15:00.320> that

documentary or thinking about ways that

documentary or thinking about ways that
they<01:15:00.560> want<01:15:00.719> to<01:15:00.800> be<01:15:00.960> supportive<01:15:01.920> in<01:15:02.080> efforts<01:15:02.480> to

they want to be supportive in efforts to

they want to be supportive in efforts to
advance

advance

advance
acceptance<01:15:05.600> and<01:15:05.679> recognition

acceptance and recognition

acceptance and recognition
you<01:15:07.440> know<01:15:07.600> one<01:15:07.840> is<01:15:08.000> to<01:15:08.159> recognize<01:15:08.719> that<01:15:08.880> there

you know one is to recognize that there

you know one is to recognize that there
are<01:15:09.600> different<01:15:09.920> ways<01:15:10.239> of<01:15:10.400> expressing<01:15:10.880> gender

are different ways of expressing gender

are different ways of expressing gender
and<01:15:11.760> one<01:15:12.000> is<01:15:12.080> to<01:15:12.239> take<01:15:12.480> some<01:15:12.640> of<01:15:12.719> the<01:15:12.880> pressure

and one is to take some of the pressure

and one is to take some of the pressure
off<01:15:13.520> of<01:15:13.600> that<01:15:13.840> you<01:15:14.000> know<01:15:14.480> as<01:15:14.640> my<01:15:14.880> young<01:15:15.199> niece

off of that you know as my young niece

off of that you know as my young niece
first<01:15:15.840> said<01:15:16.080> to<01:15:16.239> me<01:15:16.719> gender<01:15:17.040> is<01:15:17.199> for<01:15:17.360> jerks<01:15:17.840> you

first said to me gender is for jerks you

first said to me gender is for jerks you
know<01:15:18.560> sometimes<01:15:19.280> we<01:15:19.440> need<01:15:19.600> to<01:15:19.679> look<01:15:19.920> at<01:15:20.000> it

know sometimes we need to look at it

know sometimes we need to look at it
closely<01:15:20.880> and<01:15:21.040> make<01:15:21.199> sure<01:15:21.520> that<01:15:21.760> we<01:15:21.920> are

closely and make sure that we are

closely and make sure that we are
fighting<01:15:22.960> to<01:15:23.440> make<01:15:23.600> space<01:15:24.000> for<01:15:24.159> everybody<01:15:24.800> and

fighting to make space for everybody and

fighting to make space for everybody and
sometimes<01:15:25.440> we<01:15:25.600> have<01:15:25.760> to<01:15:25.840> lighten<01:15:26.239> up<01:15:26.400> a<01:15:26.480> little

sometimes we have to lighten up a little

sometimes we have to lighten up a little
bit<01:15:26.960> and<01:15:27.040> just<01:15:27.360> let<01:15:27.600> people<01:15:27.920> be<01:15:28.239> you<01:15:28.320> know

bit and just let people be you know

bit and just let people be you know
girls<01:15:28.880> will<01:15:29.040> be<01:15:29.199> boys<01:15:29.520> and<01:15:29.679> boys<01:15:30.000> will<01:15:30.080> be

girls will be boys and boys will be

girls will be boys and boys will be
girls<01:15:30.719> i<01:15:31.040> i<01:15:31.199> sincerely<01:15:31.840> don't<01:15:32.159> care<01:15:32.880> what

girls i i sincerely don't care what

girls i i sincerely don't care what
gender<01:15:33.520> pronoun<01:15:34.000> someone<01:15:34.320> uses<01:15:34.719> sometimes

gender pronoun someone uses sometimes

gender pronoun someone uses sometimes
people<01:15:35.360> will<01:15:35.520> mistake<01:15:36.320> me<01:15:36.560> and<01:15:36.960> call<01:15:37.120> me<01:15:37.760> sir

people will mistake me and call me sir

people will mistake me and call me sir
or<01:15:38.239> ma'am<01:15:38.560> or<01:15:38.640> whatever<01:15:39.040> i<01:15:39.199> i<01:15:39.360> sincerely<01:15:40.000> don't

or ma'am or whatever i i sincerely don't

or ma'am or whatever i i sincerely don't
care<01:15:40.800> about<01:15:40.960> that<01:15:41.440> what<01:15:41.600> i<01:15:41.760> care<01:15:41.920> about<01:15:42.159> is

care about that what i care about is

care about that what i care about is
intentionality<01:15:43.440> if<01:15:43.760> if<01:15:43.920> what<01:15:44.080> you're<01:15:44.239> doing

intentionality if if what you're doing

intentionality if if what you're doing
is<01:15:44.880> trying<01:15:45.280> to<01:15:46.000> demean<01:15:46.480> me<01:15:46.719> or<01:15:46.880> trying<01:15:47.120> to

is trying to demean me or trying to

is trying to demean me or trying to
humiliate<01:15:47.840> or<01:15:48.000> attack<01:15:48.400> me<01:15:48.719> then<01:15:48.880> that's

humiliate or attack me then that's

humiliate or attack me then that's
hurtful<01:15:49.679> regardless<01:15:50.239> of<01:15:50.320> what<01:15:50.560> pronoun<01:15:50.960> you

hurtful regardless of what pronoun you

hurtful regardless of what pronoun you
use<01:15:51.440> and<01:15:51.520> if<01:15:51.600> you're<01:15:51.920> trying<01:15:52.320> to<01:15:52.880> recognize<01:15:53.440> me

use and if you're trying to recognize me

use and if you're trying to recognize me
and<01:15:53.760> see<01:15:54.000> me<01:15:54.320> and<01:15:54.400> with<01:15:54.960> respect<01:15:55.679> greet<01:15:56.000> me

and see me and with respect greet me

and see me and with respect greet me
then<01:15:56.960> it<01:15:57.120> is<01:15:57.280> irrelevant<01:15:57.840> what<01:15:58.000> pronoun<01:15:58.400> you

then it is irrelevant what pronoun you

then it is irrelevant what pronoun you
use<01:15:59.280> for<01:15:59.440> me

use for me

use for me
to<01:16:00.400> be<01:16:00.560> this<01:16:00.719> like<01:16:00.880> hollywood<01:16:01.280> image<01:16:01.520> but

to be this like hollywood image but

to be this like hollywood image but
really<01:16:01.920> you<01:16:02.080> just<01:16:02.239> need<01:16:02.400> to<01:16:02.480> be<01:16:02.640> yourself<01:16:03.360> no

really you just need to be yourself no

really you just need to be yourself no
matter<01:16:03.760> what<01:16:03.920> that<01:16:04.159> is<01:16:04.400> and<01:16:04.480> just<01:16:04.640> own<01:16:04.960> it<01:16:05.280> i

matter what that is and just own it i

matter what that is and just own it i
think<01:16:05.600> it's<01:16:05.840> important<01:16:06.159> that<01:16:06.239> people<01:16:06.480> are

think it's important that people are

think it's important that people are
telling<01:16:06.800> their<01:16:06.960> own<01:16:07.120> stories

telling their own stories

telling their own stories
because

because

because
voicelessness<01:16:11.040> is<01:16:11.280> a<01:16:11.520> large<01:16:11.920> component<01:16:12.560> of

voicelessness is a large component of

voicelessness is a large component of
marginalization<01:16:13.920> i<01:16:14.080> just<01:16:14.239> want<01:16:14.400> everybody

marginalization i just want everybody

marginalization i just want everybody
everybody<01:16:15.280> to<01:16:15.440> be

everybody to be

everybody to be
happy<01:16:17.440> and<01:16:17.679> understand<01:16:18.159> that<01:16:18.400> there<01:16:18.560> are<01:16:18.800> so

happy and understand that there are so

happy and understand that there are so
many<01:16:19.199> different<01:16:19.440> forms<01:16:19.679> of<01:16:19.840> beauty

many different forms of beauty

many different forms of beauty
i<01:16:21.040> just<01:16:21.199> like<01:16:21.440> to<01:16:21.679> bring<01:16:21.920> happiness<01:16:22.320> to<01:16:22.480> people

i just like to bring happiness to people

i just like to bring happiness to people
around<01:16:23.120> me<01:16:23.520> given<01:16:23.840> a<01:16:24.000> lot<01:16:24.159> of<01:16:24.239> what<01:16:24.400> i've<01:16:24.560> done

around me given a lot of what i've done

around me given a lot of what i've done
in<01:16:25.120> my<01:16:25.280> life<01:16:25.679> i<01:16:26.080> i<01:16:26.239> can<01:16:26.400> appreciate<01:16:26.880> the<01:16:26.960> words

in my life i i can appreciate the words

in my life i i can appreciate the words
identity<01:16:27.840> because<01:16:28.080> i<01:16:28.159> think<01:16:28.320> it<01:16:28.400> builds

identity because i think it builds

identity because i think it builds
community<01:16:29.040> it<01:16:29.120> gives<01:16:29.360> us<01:16:29.440> a<01:16:29.520> sense<01:16:29.760> of<01:16:29.840> purpose

community it gives us a sense of purpose

community it gives us a sense of purpose
and<01:16:30.800> really<01:16:31.199> gives<01:16:31.520> us<01:16:31.679> a<01:16:31.760> place<01:16:32.000> to<01:16:32.159> seek

and really gives us a place to seek

and really gives us a place to seek
other<01:16:32.719> people<01:16:33.040> out<01:16:33.440> so<01:16:33.600> when<01:16:33.760> we<01:16:34.000> start<01:16:34.320> to

other people out so when we start to

other people out so when we start to
police<01:16:35.360> how<01:16:35.600> we're<01:16:35.760> supposed<01:16:36.159> to<01:16:36.320> express

police how we're supposed to express

police how we're supposed to express
ourselves<01:16:37.199> and<01:16:37.280> when<01:16:37.600> we<01:16:37.760> start<01:16:37.920> to<01:16:38.000> decide

ourselves and when we start to decide

ourselves and when we start to decide
very<01:16:38.800> arbitrarily<01:16:40.000> what<01:16:40.320> gender<01:16:40.719> is<01:16:41.040> and<01:16:41.199> how

very arbitrarily what gender is and how

very arbitrarily what gender is and how
it's<01:16:41.520> supposed<01:16:41.840> to<01:16:42.000> manifest<01:16:42.640> on<01:16:42.800> a<01:16:42.880> human

it's supposed to manifest on a human

it's supposed to manifest on a human
body<01:16:43.920> we<01:16:44.080> start<01:16:44.320> to<01:16:44.400> get<01:16:44.719> all<01:16:44.880> of<01:16:45.120> us<01:16:45.280> in

body we start to get all of us in

body we start to get all of us in
trouble<01:16:45.920> and<01:16:46.239> and<01:16:46.480> the<01:16:46.640> more<01:16:46.880> that<01:16:47.040> we<01:16:47.199> can

trouble and and the more that we can

trouble and and the more that we can
allow<01:16:47.840> people<01:16:48.480> to<01:16:48.719> express<01:16:49.120> themselves<01:16:49.679> and

allow people to express themselves and

allow people to express themselves and
to<01:16:49.920> be<01:16:50.080> themselves<01:16:51.040> and<01:16:51.199> to<01:16:51.440> breathe<01:16:51.920> respect

to be themselves and to breathe respect

to be themselves and to breathe respect
and<01:16:52.640> dignity<01:16:53.120> and<01:16:53.199> beauty<01:16:53.520> into<01:16:53.760> that<01:16:54.239> the

and dignity and beauty into that the

and dignity and beauty into that the
more<01:16:54.640> we<01:16:54.800> advance<01:16:55.199> frankly<01:16:55.600> the<01:16:55.679> human<01:16:56.000> race

more we advance frankly the human race

more we advance frankly the human race
[Music]

the truth is all we really need to come

the truth is all we really need to come
into<01:17:14.159> this<01:17:14.560> world<01:17:14.960> and<01:17:15.280> leave<01:17:16.239> danger<01:17:16.960> lives

into this world and leave danger lives

into this world and leave danger lives
in<01:17:17.679> being<01:17:18.239> led<01:17:19.120> freedom<01:17:19.679> street<01:17:20.239> is<01:17:20.719> left<01:17:21.520> on

in being led freedom street is left on

in being led freedom street is left on
red

who i stop be i'll make my choice i will

who i stop be i'll make my choice i will
not<01:17:33.280> die

not die

not die
put<01:17:35.120> my<01:17:35.440> dreams<01:17:36.120> inside<01:17:37.600> i'll<01:17:37.920> walk<01:17:38.320> where

put my dreams inside i'll walk where

put my dreams inside i'll walk where
heroes<01:17:40.199> tread

heroes tread

heroes tread
left<01:17:42.400> on<01:17:42.640> the<01:17:42.800> red

left on the red

left on the red
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
[Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause]
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
i<01:17:53.679> do

i do

i do
not<01:17:55.199> feel

not feel

not feel
[Music]

i made my choice i will not die

i made my choice i will not die
with<01:18:20.159> my<01:18:20.480> dreams<01:18:21.080> inside

with my dreams inside

with my dreams inside
i<01:18:22.960> walk<01:18:23.360> where<01:18:23.760> heroes<01:18:24.719> stress

i walk where heroes stress

i walk where heroes stress
[Applause]

[Applause]

[Applause]
[Music]

[Music]

[Music]
thought<01:18:36.960> you<01:18:37.120> were<01:18:37.360> a<01:18:37.520> bird

the velvet gloves to hide your bloody

the velvet gloves to hide your bloody
hands<01:18:54.080> and<01:18:54.320> feelings

hands and feelings

hands and feelings
you're<01:18:56.080> an<01:18:56.360> interloper

you're an interloper

you're an interloper
that's<01:18:58.480> what<01:18:58.800> they<01:18:59.120> told<01:19:00.000> ya<01:19:00.719> nobody<01:19:01.440> trusts

that's what they told ya nobody trusts

that's what they told ya nobody trusts
you<01:19:02.400> if<01:19:02.560> you<01:19:02.800> want<01:19:03.120> it<01:19:03.360> both<01:19:03.840> ways

you if you want it both ways

you if you want it both ways
there's<01:19:06.159> a<01:19:06.320> fox<01:19:06.719> amidst<01:19:07.120> the<01:19:07.440> ends<01:19:08.400> there<01:19:08.560> are

there's a fox amidst the ends there are

there's a fox amidst the ends there are
feathers<01:19:09.280> in<01:19:09.440> the<01:19:09.679> den<01:19:10.239> nobody<01:19:10.960> trusts<01:19:11.440> you

feathers in the den nobody trusts you

feathers in the den nobody trusts you
they<01:19:12.320> don't<01:19:12.560> know<01:19:12.880> your<01:19:13.760> name