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1
00:00:12,012 --> 00:00:15,632
(I Love Lucy theme music playing)
2
00:00:33,867 --> 00:00:34,868
Here.
3
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:37,203
Thanks.
4
00:00:37,203 --> 00:00:39,622
Oh, the opera opened last night.
5
00:00:39,622 --> 00:00:41,624
Will you look at that.
6
00:00:41,624 --> 00:00:44,961
The lobby looks like a field of
waving mink.
7
00:00:46,746 --> 00:00:50,250
Gee, and all the parties they went to
afterward--
8
00:00:50,250 --> 00:00:51,751
21 and El Morocco...
9
00:00:51,751 --> 00:00:53,586
Gosh, I bet they had a good time.
10
00:00:53,586 --> 00:00:54,554
Lucy...
11
00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:55,555
Huh?
12
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:57,640
Why do you envy those people?
13
00:00:57,640 --> 00:00:59,092
I don't envy them.
14
00:00:59,092 --> 00:01:01,594
I just wish I could dress like them
15
00:01:01,594 --> 00:01:03,980
and live the way they do, that's all.
16
00:01:03,980 --> 00:01:06,433
Honey, the only way to be real happy
17
00:01:06,933 --> 00:01:09,235
is to be satisfied with what you got.
18
00:01:09,235 --> 00:01:11,938
Oh? What have I got?
19
00:01:14,324 --> 00:01:16,326
Me.
20
00:01:16,326 --> 00:01:21,164
My cup runneth over.
21
00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,583
Well!
22
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:25,418
Thank you.
23
00:01:25,785 --> 00:01:26,419
Oh, no.
24
00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,421
What happened?
25
00:01:28,421 --> 00:01:31,341
"Cynthia Harcourt just got back from
Europe
26
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,176
and is in town on a charity drive."
27
00:01:33,176 --> 00:01:34,627
So? What's that to you?
28
00:01:34,627 --> 00:01:36,129
Oh, I went to school with her.
29
00:01:36,129 --> 00:01:37,630
Oh.
30
00:01:37,630 --> 00:01:39,632
She had nothing but money, and she
married money.
31
00:01:39,632 --> 00:01:41,434
Seemed like such a waste to me.
32
00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:45,138
Money always marries money.
33
00:01:45,138 --> 00:01:48,858
Yeah. Why doesn't money ever marry
broke?
34
00:01:48,858 --> 00:01:50,643
Who knows?
35
00:01:50,643 --> 00:01:52,061
Well, if she's on a charity drive,
36
00:01:52,061 --> 00:01:54,063
I just won't answer the phone for a
few days.
37
00:01:54,063 --> 00:01:56,566
She always calls up all the girls she
went to school with
38
00:01:56,566 --> 00:01:57,867
and asks for contributions, you know.
39
00:01:57,867 --> 00:01:58,735
So let her call.
40
00:01:59,235 --> 00:02:00,954
She knows you're not wealthy.
41
00:02:00,954 --> 00:02:02,288
Well, I don't know.
44
00:02:08,795 --> 00:02:15,301
And where, pray say, did she get this
impression?
45
00:02:15,301 --> 00:02:17,637
From the same person that told her
46
00:02:17,637 --> 00:02:21,007
that you really own a big sugar
plantation in Cuba.
47
00:02:21,007 --> 00:02:23,510
Who is that?
48
00:02:23,510 --> 00:02:25,478
Someone we all know and love
49
00:02:25,478 --> 00:02:27,597
who ought to keep her big mouth shut.
50
00:02:27,597 --> 00:02:29,599
Now you see what I mean?
51
00:02:29,599 --> 00:02:31,100
You were envious of somebody.
52
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:34,103
You tried to be something that you
weren't
53
00:02:34,103 --> 00:02:35,605
and now you're in trouble.
54
00:02:35,605 --> 00:02:37,106
You're right, Ricky.
55
00:02:37,106 --> 00:02:39,609
I'm never gonna be envious of anyone
again.
56
00:02:39,609 --> 00:02:40,860
Good.
57
00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:44,747
What if I'm not sitting in the lap of
luxury?
58
00:02:44,747 --> 00:02:49,252
I'm happy where I am-- on the bony
knees of nothing.
59
00:02:51,037 --> 00:02:53,506
I like bony knees.
60
00:02:56,426 --> 00:02:58,511
(phone ringing)
61
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:05,268
Hello.
62
00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:08,938
Lucy, darling, this is Cynthia,
Cynthia Harcourt.
63
00:03:08,938 --> 00:03:10,440
Cynthia, dear.
64
00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,193
Oh, darling, it's so nice to speak to
you again.
65
00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,527
I can't believe I'm here.
66
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,813
You know, only last night I was in
Paris.
67
00:03:16,813 --> 00:03:17,897
Oh?
68
00:03:17,897 --> 00:03:18,781
Oh, Paris!
69
00:03:19,282 --> 00:03:22,035
Give me Paris in the springtime.
70
00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:23,903
Isn't that the way you feel, dear?
71
00:03:23,903 --> 00:03:25,205
Oh, oui, oui.
72
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:27,290
Oh! Vous parlez francais?
73
00:03:27,290 --> 00:03:29,158
Huh?
74
00:03:29,158 --> 00:03:31,160
Parlez-vous francais?
75
00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:33,046
How's that again?
76
00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,831
Do you speak French?
77
00:03:34,831 --> 00:03:37,667
Oh, yes. Fluently.
78
00:03:37,667 --> 00:03:39,669
Oh, Lucy, you're so droll.
79
00:03:40,169 --> 00:03:41,170
(Lucy laughing)
80
00:03:41,170 --> 00:03:42,672
Well, tell me, dear.
81
00:03:42,672 --> 00:03:45,174
You know, we're staying in a hotel
now,
82
00:03:45,174 --> 00:03:48,177
but Cyrus is thinking of moving to
New York
83
00:03:48,177 --> 00:03:49,479
and I was wondering--
84
00:03:49,479 --> 00:03:51,764
how's the servant problem?
85
00:03:52,265 --> 00:03:53,766
The servant problem?
86
00:03:53,766 --> 00:03:54,767
Yes.
87
00:03:54,767 --> 00:03:56,269
Oh, frightful, darling.
88
00:03:56,269 --> 00:03:58,771
I just don't know what to do about
it.
89
00:03:58,771 --> 00:04:02,275
Well, do you think that I could get
by with a staff of ten?
90
00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:05,778
Oh, yes, I think you can get by with
a staff of ten.
91
00:04:05,778 --> 00:04:07,163
Well, how many do you have?
92
00:04:07,163 --> 00:04:09,916
Me? Oh, I have, uh...
93
00:04:09,916 --> 00:04:12,085
Well, do you have more than ten?
94
00:04:12,085 --> 00:04:13,920
Well, uh...
frankly, Cynthia.
95
00:04:13,920 --> 00:04:15,922
I think that you should know
96
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:17,924
we live a very simple life.
97
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,926
We have a tiny little place.
98
00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:22,178
We're just normal, average people.
99
00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:23,263
Oh.
100
00:04:23,263 --> 00:04:24,547
I'm going over to see Fred.
101
00:04:24,547 --> 00:04:25,548
Okay, dear.
102
00:04:25,548 --> 00:04:28,551
Well, how many do you have?
103
00:04:28,551 --> 00:04:30,053
Eight.
104
00:04:33,439 --> 00:04:37,894
Oh. My, you must have a tiny place.
105
00:04:37,894 --> 00:04:40,897
Well, uh, dear, this nasty, old money
business--
106
00:04:40,897 --> 00:04:42,398
you know I really hate it,
107
00:04:42,899 --> 00:04:45,902
but I'm chairman of the charity drive
this year,
108
00:04:45,902 --> 00:04:49,289
and I was wondering how much I could
count on you for?
109
00:04:49,289 --> 00:04:51,240
Well, Cynthia, I've given
110
00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:54,744
to so many charitable things this
year
111
00:04:54,744 --> 00:04:56,579
I've practically nothing left.
112
00:04:56,579 --> 00:05:00,500
Oh, Lucy, darling, I'd hate to print
your name in the book
113
00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:02,502
and put a zero after it.
114
00:05:02,502 --> 00:05:04,804
Yes. I'm sure you would, dear.
115
00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:08,308
Well, surely you can scrape a few
dollars together,
116
00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,310
like your classmates did.
117
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,595
Anita gave seven, Adelle gave six
118
00:05:12,595 --> 00:05:13,896
and Hazel gave eight.
119
00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:15,398
Oh, I had no idea
120
00:05:15,398 --> 00:05:17,900
that such a sniggly little bit would
count.
121
00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:21,404
Oh, certainly, darling, everything
counts.
122
00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,656
Oh, well, put me down for five.
123
00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:26,326
Wonderful! Should I pop over and pick
it up?
124
00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,110
Uh, no. No.
125
00:05:27,610 --> 00:05:29,112
I'm going shopping today.
126
00:05:29,112 --> 00:05:31,114
I'd be glad to drop it by.
127
00:05:31,114 --> 00:05:33,116
Oh, fine. Wonderful.
I'll see you then, dear.
128
00:05:33,116 --> 00:05:36,119
All right. Where are you staying,
Cynthia?
129
00:05:36,119 --> 00:05:37,120
Cynthia?
130
00:05:37,620 --> 00:05:38,621
Oh, darn it.
131
00:05:38,621 --> 00:05:39,622
What's the matter?
132
00:05:40,123 --> 00:05:42,125
Oh... that was an old schoolmate of
mine,
133
00:05:42,125 --> 00:05:44,127
Cynthia Harcourt, and she's here
134
00:05:44,127 --> 00:05:46,045
on a charit...
The Cynthia Harcourt?
135
00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:48,047
Yeah.
Did you go to school with her?
136
00:05:48,047 --> 00:05:49,966
Yeah, and she's in town on a charity
drive.
137
00:05:49,966 --> 00:05:50,967
I promised to drop a check
138
00:05:51,467 --> 00:05:52,468
but I don't know where she's staying.
139
00:05:52,969 --> 00:05:55,471
Well, it told all about it in the
society column this morning.
140
00:05:55,471 --> 00:05:56,472
I was reading it.
141
00:05:56,472 --> 00:05:58,474
That's right.
I forgot.
142
00:05:58,474 --> 00:06:01,978
Yeah. She has a penthouse at the
Waldorf.
143
00:06:01,978 --> 00:06:04,480
Oh, gee. I've always wanted to see
144
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:05,982
what a penthouse looked like.
145
00:06:06,482 --> 00:06:07,483
Want to go with me?
146
00:06:07,483 --> 00:06:08,484
Can I?
147
00:06:08,484 --> 00:06:09,986
Sure.
148
00:06:09,986 --> 00:06:11,988
Oh, boy, yes. Imagine me in high
society.
149
00:06:11,988 --> 00:06:13,740
Hi.
150
00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:15,241
(loftily): Oh, Frederic, darling,
151
00:06:15,241 --> 00:06:18,127
If you're looking for me this
afternoon, I shan't be home.
152
00:06:18,628 --> 00:06:20,413
I'll be at the penthouse at the
Waldorf.
153
00:06:20,413 --> 00:06:23,633
Well, she finally flipped.
154
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:28,471
She did not.
155
00:06:28,471 --> 00:06:30,473
She's going with me to see an old
schoolmate
156
00:06:30,973 --> 00:06:33,726
who put the bite on me for a charity
drive.
157
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:34,727
Lucy?
158
00:06:34,727 --> 00:06:35,728
Yeah?
159
00:06:35,728 --> 00:06:37,730
How much did she bit you for?
160
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:38,731
Five measly dollars.
161
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,733
I'm taking her a check.
162
00:06:40,733 --> 00:06:42,518
Why don't you mail it to her?
163
00:06:42,518 --> 00:06:44,353
Oh, because I want to see her
penthouse.
164
00:06:44,353 --> 00:06:45,188
I bet it's just fabulous.
165
00:06:45,188 --> 00:06:46,656
There you go again--
166
00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:49,025
wanting something that you haven't
got.
167
00:06:49,025 --> 00:06:51,027
I do not.
I just want to see
168
00:06:51,027 --> 00:06:54,030
what it is I haven't got that I don't
want.
169
00:07:02,538 --> 00:07:06,542
Okay, old man, we're going to go for
a nice walk.
170
00:07:06,542 --> 00:07:08,044
It's a beautiful day.
171
00:07:08,044 --> 00:07:09,879
Say good-bye to Mommy.
172
00:07:09,879 --> 00:07:12,348
Bye-bye, darling.
173
00:07:12,348 --> 00:07:13,683
Give me a kiss.
174
00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:15,134
You be a good boy, now.
175
00:07:15,134 --> 00:07:17,136
Now, honey, remember-- no hot dogs
176
00:07:17,136 --> 00:07:18,638
no peanuts, no popcorn.
177
00:07:18,638 --> 00:07:20,056
All right, how about a glass of beer?
178
00:07:20,056 --> 00:07:21,524
Oh!
179
00:07:21,524 --> 00:07:23,526
Come on, now, you keep him bundled
up, too.
180
00:07:23,526 --> 00:07:25,027
I think it might rain today, dear.
181
00:07:25,528 --> 00:07:26,028
Yes, ma'am.
182
00:07:26,529 --> 00:07:27,530
Well, now, be careful with him.
183
00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:29,031
I will.
Oh, hi, honey.
You going out?
184
00:07:29,031 --> 00:07:30,533
Yeah. He's going for a walk.
185
00:07:30,533 --> 00:07:32,318
Come on, Fred, you want to walk with
us, man?
186
00:07:32,318 --> 00:07:35,238
Okay. Come on, champ.
Come on, we'll take you.
187
00:07:35,238 --> 00:07:36,739
Now, honey, keep him bundled up.
188
00:07:36,739 --> 00:07:39,041
All right, Mother, all right.
Good-bye.
189
00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:40,460
Bye-bye, darling.
190
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,462
Come on. Are you ready?
191
00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:45,965
Yeah, just about. I got the check all
made out here.
192
00:07:45,965 --> 00:07:49,385
I got to take one last look and see
if I'm all right.
193
00:07:49,385 --> 00:07:50,720
I put this flower on my hat.
194
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:52,138
Do you think it's okay?
195
00:07:52,138 --> 00:07:54,006
ETHEL: Oh, I think you look great.
196
00:07:54,006 --> 00:07:55,508
All right.
197
00:07:55,508 --> 00:07:58,511
You didn't say anything about how I
look.
198
00:07:58,511 --> 00:07:59,512
Lucy, darling!
199
00:08:00,012 --> 00:08:01,013
Oh! Cynthia!
200
00:08:01,013 --> 00:08:02,482
Oh, Cynthia, uh...
201
00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:05,985
Uh, Ethel, this is Cynthia Harcourt.
202
00:08:05,985 --> 00:08:07,487
This is Ethel Mertz.
203
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:08,738
Oh. Charmed.
204
00:08:08,738 --> 00:08:10,490
Ooh, likewise.
205
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:13,192
Well, you know, darling, I realized
after I spoke with you on the phone
206
00:08:13,693 --> 00:08:15,194
that I hadn't told you where we were
staying.
207
00:08:15,695 --> 00:08:17,997
So I thought I'd just pop over
myself.
208
00:08:17,997 --> 00:08:20,917
Oh, well, I'm awfully glad you did,
Cynthia.
209
00:08:20,917 --> 00:08:24,203
You'll have to forgive the way the
place looks.
210
00:08:24,203 --> 00:08:27,590
I... well, I-I just flew into a nasty
rage this morning
211
00:08:28,090 --> 00:08:29,592
and fired all the servants.
212
00:08:29,592 --> 00:08:30,877
Didn't I, Ethel.
213
00:08:30,877 --> 00:08:32,128
All of 'em.
214
00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:38,100
You know, dear, I've been thinking.
215
00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:41,103
Really, maybe I shouldn't have phoned
you
216
00:08:41,103 --> 00:08:42,104
to ask you for money.
217
00:08:42,605 --> 00:08:43,606
I mean, you know
218
00:08:43,606 --> 00:08:46,108
with the tiny, little place you have
here
219
00:08:46,609 --> 00:08:48,110
and being a bandleader's wife and
all,
220
00:08:48,110 --> 00:08:49,979
maybe you can't afford it.
221
00:08:49,979 --> 00:08:51,447
Oh, nonsense, Cynthia.
222
00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:55,451
This dump is just a place for Ricky
to hang his clothes.
223
00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:57,954
We spend most of our time in the
country.
224
00:08:57,954 --> 00:08:59,739
Oh, this is your town house?
225
00:08:59,739 --> 00:09:02,158
Well, it's really our town closet.
226
00:09:02,158 --> 00:09:05,161
Yes. We have a beautiful summer
place--
227
00:09:05,161 --> 00:09:07,997
a big mansion, stables, and swimming
pool.
228
00:09:07,997 --> 00:09:09,415
And tennis courts.
229
00:09:09,415 --> 00:09:12,418
Oh, delightful... sounds like our
summer place.
230
00:09:12,418 --> 00:09:13,302
Where's yours?
231
00:09:13,302 --> 00:09:15,171
Um... where's yours?
232
00:09:15,171 --> 00:09:16,172
Bucks County.
233
00:09:16,172 --> 00:09:17,974
Oh, ours is in Westchester.
234
00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:20,393
Oh, wonderful. We must come and visit
you soon.
235
00:09:20,393 --> 00:09:22,895
Oh, well, that would be lovely,
Cynthia,
236
00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:23,896
except that we don't expect
237
00:09:24,397 --> 00:09:26,182
to spend much time there this season.
238
00:09:26,182 --> 00:09:29,235
You're going to Florida.
239
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:31,938
Why not?
240
00:09:31,938 --> 00:09:33,940
Well, so are we.
241
00:09:33,940 --> 00:09:34,941
Oh.
242
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:36,943
Where do you go in Florida?
243
00:09:36,943 --> 00:09:38,444
Miami or West Palm Beach?
244
00:09:38,444 --> 00:09:40,746
Uh, you go West Palm Beach, huh?
245
00:09:40,746 --> 00:09:41,747
Miami.
246
00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:43,115
Oh, we go West Palm Beach.
247
00:09:43,115 --> 00:09:45,585
But, darling, the harbor's so small
there.
248
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:47,587
What do you do with your yacht?
249
00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:55,261
To make it fit, we crank down the
smokestack
250
00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:58,264
and squeeze in the poop deck.
251
00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:03,269
Oh, Lucy, you are droll.
252
00:10:03,603 --> 00:10:05,554
Oh, droll is the word.
253
00:10:05,554 --> 00:10:07,056
Well, really, I hate to be crass
254
00:10:07,056 --> 00:10:09,058
but I suppose we should get down to
business.
255
00:10:09,558 --> 00:10:10,059
Oh, yes.
256
00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:11,560
Do sit down, Cynthia.
257
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:12,561
Thank you.
258
00:10:12,561 --> 00:10:15,564
Now, I'll get out my little book
here.
259
00:10:15,564 --> 00:10:18,567
Now, let me see.
260
00:10:18,567 --> 00:10:21,037
Yes...
"Lucille McGillicuddy Ricardo."
261
00:10:21,037 --> 00:10:24,040
Now, you said on the phone you were
going to give five.
262
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,324
Is that right?
That's right.
263
00:10:25,324 --> 00:10:28,210
You can put me down for five, too.
264
00:10:28,210 --> 00:10:31,213
Oh, marvelous, Mrs. Hertz.
265
00:10:31,213 --> 00:10:32,214
Thank you.
266
00:10:32,214 --> 00:10:34,717
It's Mertz.
267
00:10:35,217 --> 00:10:37,219
You spell it with an "M."
268
00:10:37,219 --> 00:10:39,472
Oh? Oh, thank you.
269
00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:44,593
"Mrs. Mertz-- five hundred... "
270
00:10:44,593 --> 00:10:46,429
LUCY: Uh...
271
00:10:46,429 --> 00:10:47,730
Oh, uh... Cynthia...
272
00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:53,152
W-W-We didn't really mean 500.
273
00:10:53,152 --> 00:10:54,987
Five thousand?
274
00:10:54,987 --> 00:10:56,105
Oh, no.
275
00:10:56,105 --> 00:10:57,406
Well, you...
276
00:10:57,406 --> 00:11:01,911
you certainly couldn't have meant
five dollars.
277
00:11:07,249 --> 00:11:09,085
Oh, no.
278
00:11:09,085 --> 00:11:11,504
Well, what did you mean?
279
00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:17,376
I... I guess we meant 500.
280
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:24,050
Well, are you going to give me your
check now, dear?
281
00:11:24,050 --> 00:11:25,551
Oh, uh, no.
282
00:11:25,551 --> 00:11:28,020
No. I'll have to send you the check.
283
00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:30,856
My business manager makes out all my
checks.
284
00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:33,275
Oh, fine. Well, I'm at the Waldorf.
285
00:11:33,776 --> 00:11:34,276
Yes.
286
00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:36,278
Your check, Mrs. Mertz?
287
00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:40,282
Oh, her business manager makes out
all my checks, too.
288
00:11:40,282 --> 00:11:41,784
Oh?
289
00:11:41,784 --> 00:11:44,286
I just love his handwriting.
290
00:11:44,286 --> 00:11:45,738
Oh, well...
very well.
291
00:11:45,738 --> 00:11:47,239
I'll hear from you then.
292
00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:48,741
Oh, yes, Cynthia. Yes.
293
00:11:49,241 --> 00:11:50,743
I'm so glad that you came by, dear.
294
00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,745
It's wonderful seeing you again.
295
00:11:52,745 --> 00:11:53,746
Good-bye.
296
00:11:53,746 --> 00:11:55,247
Good-bye.
297
00:11:55,247 --> 00:11:57,550
(gasping)
298
00:11:57,550 --> 00:12:01,454
$500... each!
299
00:12:15,034 --> 00:12:16,035
Hi.
300
00:12:16,035 --> 00:12:17,036
Hi.
301
00:12:17,036 --> 00:12:18,337
How'd you do?
302
00:12:18,337 --> 00:12:20,673
All I could find was 76 cents
303
00:12:20,673 --> 00:12:23,175
in one of Fred's old coats.
304
00:12:23,175 --> 00:12:24,510
What are you doing?
305
00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:29,465
I'm checking the local branch of the
first national couch.
306
00:12:29,465 --> 00:12:31,467
You find anything?
307
00:12:31,467 --> 00:12:33,969
51 cents, a button, a nail file
308
00:12:33,969 --> 00:12:37,223
and an old piece of Christmas candy.
309
00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:40,893
Not much of a start toward $1,000, is
it?
310
00:12:40,893 --> 00:12:43,729
No. I even opened the baby's piggy
bank.
311
00:12:43,729 --> 00:12:44,980
What'd you find?
312
00:12:44,980 --> 00:12:47,233
Three IOUs from Ricky.
313
00:12:48,651 --> 00:12:49,652
Oh, fine.
314
00:12:49,652 --> 00:12:51,153
Well, we better just send her
315
00:12:51,153 --> 00:12:52,655
our checks for five dollars
316
00:12:53,155 --> 00:12:54,156
and forget about it.
317
00:12:54,156 --> 00:12:55,624
Forget about it?
318
00:12:55,624 --> 00:12:57,960
Do you want your name in that little
book
319
00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:00,296
with "five dollars" printed after it?
320
00:13:00,296 --> 00:13:02,248
Why not? For me that's good.
321
00:13:02,248 --> 00:13:03,749
Well, for me it isn't.
322
00:13:03,749 --> 00:13:06,252
All the girls I went to school with
323
00:13:06,252 --> 00:13:07,253
will see that book
324
00:13:07,253 --> 00:13:10,256
and I told them all that Ricky's
loaded.
325
00:13:10,256 --> 00:13:12,258
I just got to get my hands on $500.
326
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:17,763
Hey-- would you be willing to work
for it?
327
00:13:17,763 --> 00:13:19,265
Sure.
328
00:13:19,265 --> 00:13:21,267
Well, Billboard always has a lot of
ads in it
329
00:13:21,267 --> 00:13:23,269
wanting people for different things.
330
00:13:23,269 --> 00:13:25,821
Let's see if there's anything in here
we could do.
331
00:13:26,188 --> 00:13:27,690
Here.
332
00:13:27,690 --> 00:13:30,826
Hey, there's something you could do.
333
00:13:30,826 --> 00:13:32,828
Oh, no, you don't.
334
00:13:33,329 --> 00:13:34,830
Not even for sweet charity
335
00:13:34,830 --> 00:13:36,782
am I going to box three rounds
336
00:13:36,782 --> 00:13:38,784
with a kangaroo.
337
00:13:40,286 --> 00:13:42,254
Let me take that.
338
00:13:42,254 --> 00:13:44,757
(sighing)
339
00:13:44,757 --> 00:13:46,759
"Need two girls with courage
340
00:13:47,259 --> 00:13:48,761
"for publicity stunt.
341
00:13:48,761 --> 00:13:51,263
High pay for right parties."
342
00:13:51,263 --> 00:13:52,264
Ah, no.
343
00:13:52,765 --> 00:13:54,133
What's the matter, haven't you got
courage?
344
00:13:54,133 --> 00:13:56,936
Yeah, I got courage, but it says they
need girls.
345
00:13:58,270 --> 00:13:59,605
Well, we're girls.
346
00:13:59,605 --> 00:14:01,941
We are?
347
00:14:02,942 --> 00:14:04,443
If you divide everybody
348
00:14:04,443 --> 00:14:06,779
into boys and girls, we're girls.
349
00:14:06,779 --> 00:14:09,148
I never thought about it like that.
350
00:14:09,148 --> 00:14:11,901
I'm going to call up and find out
about this ad.
351
00:14:11,901 --> 00:14:14,403
Okay.
This might be something we could do.
352
00:14:14,403 --> 00:14:16,872
Courage for what, I wonder.
353
00:14:21,076 --> 00:14:22,077
Hello? Hello.
354
00:14:22,077 --> 00:14:25,080
I'm calling about your ad in
Billboard--
355
00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:26,582
"two girls with courage."
356
00:14:26,582 --> 00:14:28,083
Yes, sir.
357
00:14:29,585 --> 00:14:33,088
Oh, yes. Yes, we can keep a secret.
358
00:14:33,088 --> 00:14:35,591
Oh, plenty of courage.
359
00:14:35,591 --> 00:14:37,092
Yes, sir.
360
00:14:37,092 --> 00:14:38,093
All right.
361
00:14:38,093 --> 00:14:42,598
623 East 68th Street, apartment 3D.
362
00:14:42,598 --> 00:14:43,849
All right, sir.
363
00:14:44,683 --> 00:14:45,684
Well?
364
00:14:45,684 --> 00:14:48,187
He's coming right over.
365
00:14:48,187 --> 00:14:49,855
(door buzzer)
366
00:14:53,859 --> 00:14:54,860
Hello.
367
00:14:54,860 --> 00:14:56,862
Hi. Al Sparks is the name.
368
00:14:56,862 --> 00:14:57,863
Oh.
369
00:14:57,863 --> 00:14:59,365
Well, where are the girls?
370
00:15:03,869 --> 00:15:05,671
We're the girls.
371
00:15:05,671 --> 00:15:07,289
Oh.
372
00:15:07,289 --> 00:15:08,624
Yes, this is Ethel Mertz.
373
00:15:08,624 --> 00:15:09,625
I'm Lucy Ricardo.
374
00:15:09,625 --> 00:15:10,626
How do you do.
375
00:15:10,626 --> 00:15:11,877
Won't you sit down?
376
00:15:11,877 --> 00:15:14,263
Yeah...
377
00:15:14,263 --> 00:15:15,764
Yeah, I, uh...
378
00:15:15,764 --> 00:15:17,132
I guess you'll do.
379
00:15:17,132 --> 00:15:19,101
I guess it doesn't make any
difference
380
00:15:19,101 --> 00:15:20,936
as long as you're coming from Mars.
381
00:15:22,888 --> 00:15:23,889
Mars?!
382
00:15:23,889 --> 00:15:24,890
Yeah.
383
00:15:24,890 --> 00:15:25,891
So long, Lucy.
384
00:15:25,891 --> 00:15:26,725
Ethel.
385
00:15:26,725 --> 00:15:29,478
Did you say "coming from Mars"?
386
00:15:29,478 --> 00:15:30,779
Yeah, that's right.
387
00:15:30,779 --> 00:15:32,781
You see, tomorrow night, my studio is
having
388
00:15:32,781 --> 00:15:35,284
a premiere of a new picture-- Women
From Mars.
389
00:15:35,284 --> 00:15:36,285
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
390
00:15:36,285 --> 00:15:38,787
Well, tomorrow afternoon, two Martian
women
391
00:15:38,787 --> 00:15:40,289
are going to land in New York,
392
00:15:40,289 --> 00:15:42,291
abduct an earthman, and disappear.
393
00:15:42,291 --> 00:15:44,043
Now, that's where you come in.
394
00:15:44,043 --> 00:15:45,327
That's where I go out.
395
00:15:45,828 --> 00:15:47,129
Ethel, now sit down.
396
00:15:47,129 --> 00:15:49,498
Now, don't worry.
I got every angle figured.
397
00:15:49,498 --> 00:15:50,499
Well, tell it to her.
398
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,002
Ethel, honey, you've got to do this
with me.
399
00:15:53,002 --> 00:15:54,003
No.
400
00:15:54,003 --> 00:15:55,421
Think of my reputation.
401
00:15:55,421 --> 00:15:56,422
No.
402
00:15:56,422 --> 00:15:58,724
There's 500 bucks in it for each of
you.
403
00:15:58,724 --> 00:16:00,342
Okay.
404
00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:02,761
What do we do?
405
00:16:02,761 --> 00:16:04,263
Now, here's the way I got it figured.
406
00:16:04,763 --> 00:16:06,765
The first thing we do is sneak up to
the top
407
00:16:06,765 --> 00:16:08,267
of the Empire State Building.
408
00:16:08,267 --> 00:16:10,235
The top of the Empire State
Building?!
409
00:16:21,780 --> 00:16:24,283
Well, Martha, we finally made it.
410
00:16:24,283 --> 00:16:25,284
Oh, yes, Henry--
411
00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:27,786
the top of the Empire State Building.
412
00:16:27,786 --> 00:16:30,789
You know, Martha, this is the tallest
building in the world.
413
00:16:30,789 --> 00:16:32,291
Henry, give me a dime.
414
00:16:32,291 --> 00:16:33,292
All right.
415
00:16:33,292 --> 00:16:34,293
Just a minute.
416
00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:35,794
There you are, dear.
417
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,302
Oh, I can't find it.
418
00:16:43,302 --> 00:16:45,637
Well, what are you looking for,
Martha?
419
00:16:45,637 --> 00:16:48,107
Wichita.
420
00:16:48,107 --> 00:16:49,525
Oh, Martha.
421
00:16:49,525 --> 00:16:51,527
Anybody knows Wichita is over that
way.
422
00:16:52,027 --> 00:16:53,529
Oh.
423
00:16:54,029 --> 00:16:55,531
Now point it up.
424
00:16:55,531 --> 00:16:56,532
See anything?
425
00:16:56,532 --> 00:16:57,533
No.
426
00:16:57,533 --> 00:17:00,536
A little higher. Look.
427
00:17:00,536 --> 00:17:01,537
See?
428
00:17:01,537 --> 00:17:03,822
Seen any flying saucers yet?
429
00:17:03,822 --> 00:17:05,240
Flying saucers?
430
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,242
You don't mean there really are such
things?
431
00:17:07,242 --> 00:17:08,660
Well, I don't know.
432
00:17:08,660 --> 00:17:10,162
There've been a lot of rumors lately.
433
00:17:10,162 --> 00:17:12,664
People think spaceships are coming
down from Mars and landing on Earth.
434
00:17:12,664 --> 00:17:14,666
Oh, nonsense.
435
00:17:14,666 --> 00:17:15,667
What's the matter?
436
00:17:15,667 --> 00:17:18,170
Thought I saw something flash by just
now.
437
00:17:18,170 --> 00:17:19,671
It was probably nothing.
438
00:17:20,172 --> 00:17:21,173
Look through there.
439
00:17:21,173 --> 00:17:23,175
See if you can see anything.
440
00:17:29,398 --> 00:17:31,567
Little lower.
Little lower.
441
00:17:31,567 --> 00:17:33,519
SPARKS: That may not be smoke.
442
00:17:33,519 --> 00:17:35,521
Look right through there, look.
443
00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:37,773
I don't see anything either.
444
00:17:37,773 --> 00:17:40,075
SPARKS: Well, I think I saw one.
445
00:17:45,914 --> 00:17:47,833
Look right through here, Martha.
446
00:17:47,833 --> 00:17:49,334
Right out through here.
447
00:17:49,334 --> 00:17:50,836
Little higher.
448
00:17:50,836 --> 00:17:52,838
No, it's a little lower, a little
lower than that.
449
00:17:52,838 --> 00:17:54,339
I can't see a thing.
450
00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:56,458
You can't?
451
00:17:56,458 --> 00:17:58,293
MAN: I don't think there's anything
up there, really I don't.
452
00:17:58,293 --> 00:17:59,762
Certainly looked like I saw
something.
453
00:18:00,262 --> 00:18:02,014
(speaking gibberish)
454
00:18:02,014 --> 00:18:04,183
(laughing)
455
00:18:04,183 --> 00:18:08,604
(laughing)
456
00:18:08,604 --> 00:18:11,390
(speaking gibberish)
457
00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:13,809
What are they?
458
00:18:13,809 --> 00:18:16,812
Th-th-they look like women from Mars.
459
00:18:16,812 --> 00:18:18,530
(chattering)
460
00:18:37,299 --> 00:18:40,586
(laughing and chattering)
461
00:19:08,947 --> 00:19:11,533
(screams)
462
00:19:13,035 --> 00:19:15,537
Now, now, let's not get hysterical.
463
00:19:16,038 --> 00:19:17,923
Maybe we can talk to them.
464
00:19:17,923 --> 00:19:19,925
Pardon me.
465
00:19:20,425 --> 00:19:24,429
Are... are you from Mars?
466
00:19:26,882 --> 00:19:29,218
(speaking gibberish)
467
00:19:33,138 --> 00:19:34,106
Just a minute.
468
00:19:34,606 --> 00:19:35,941
Anybody ready to go down?
469
00:19:43,615 --> 00:19:45,317
Me?
470
00:19:45,317 --> 00:19:46,318
Watch out!
471
00:19:46,318 --> 00:19:48,320
That's a paralyzing ray.
472
00:19:49,821 --> 00:19:51,823
(laughing)
473
00:20:05,504 --> 00:20:07,005
Hey, Rick, where are the girls?
474
00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:08,507
I don't know.
When I got home,
475
00:20:09,007 --> 00:20:10,509
Mrs. Trumbull was with the baby.
476
00:20:10,509 --> 00:20:11,343
What's the matter?
477
00:20:11,343 --> 00:20:12,761
What's the matter?
478
00:20:12,761 --> 00:20:15,013
We're being invaded from outer space.
479
00:20:16,348 --> 00:20:17,733
What?
480
00:20:17,733 --> 00:20:20,235
It's on every radio and television.
481
00:20:20,235 --> 00:20:23,238
A flying saucer landed on the Empire
State Building.
482
00:20:23,488 --> 00:20:25,774
40 Martians got out and captured an
earthman.
483
00:20:25,774 --> 00:20:28,777
I think you've been working too hard.
484
00:20:28,777 --> 00:20:29,778
Come on, come on.
485
00:20:29,778 --> 00:20:31,280
Let's go up on the roof
486
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:33,282
and protect our home and loved ones.
487
00:20:33,782 --> 00:20:34,783
I'll go get Little Ricky.
488
00:20:35,284 --> 00:20:36,785
He's never seen a flying saucer
before.
489
00:20:37,286 --> 00:20:38,287
And bring your binoculars.
490
00:20:38,287 --> 00:20:39,588
Bring the binoculars.
Now, come on.
491
00:20:39,588 --> 00:20:40,505
Yes, sir.
Come on.
492
00:20:41,006 --> 00:20:42,007
Right away.
493
00:20:42,007 --> 00:20:44,509
(chuckling): Ay-yi-yi-yi-yi.
494
00:20:45,010 --> 00:20:46,011
Hey, Little Ricky,
495
00:20:46,011 --> 00:20:49,014
you want to go and see some flying
saucers?
496
00:20:50,882 --> 00:20:51,883
All right, girls
497
00:20:52,384 --> 00:20:54,386
I'm going to get right out of here.
498
00:20:54,386 --> 00:20:55,687
Here you are, here's your money.
499
00:20:55,687 --> 00:20:57,272
$500 apiece.
Thank you very much.
500
00:20:57,272 --> 00:20:59,141
Okay, I haven't got time to wait for
you to change,
501
00:20:59,141 --> 00:21:00,442
so I'll pick the uniforms up later.
502
00:21:00,442 --> 00:21:01,643
Okay.
You were great.
503
00:21:01,643 --> 00:21:02,978
Bye.
Bye.
504
00:21:02,978 --> 00:21:03,979
(both laughing)
505
00:21:04,479 --> 00:21:06,982
(speaking gibberish)
506
00:21:16,992 --> 00:21:20,996
...Sechs, sieben, acht, neun.
507
00:21:21,496 --> 00:21:22,998
How are things on Mars?
508
00:21:22,998 --> 00:21:23,999
Very wealthy.
509
00:21:27,052 --> 00:21:28,053
Change?
510
00:21:28,053 --> 00:21:29,054
Change.
511
00:21:29,054 --> 00:21:29,972
Change.
512
00:21:36,144 --> 00:21:39,147
(speaking gibberish)
513
00:21:53,528 --> 00:21:56,531
"New York invaded by Martian women.
514
00:21:56,531 --> 00:21:59,034
"Hordes of invaders also seen
515
00:21:59,034 --> 00:22:01,536
in New Jersey and Connecticut."
516
00:22:01,536 --> 00:22:05,507
One man in Connecticut saw 20 of us.
517
00:22:05,507 --> 00:22:07,509
(laughing)
518
00:22:07,509 --> 00:22:10,012
Oh, look at those headlines.
519
00:22:10,512 --> 00:22:11,013
Lucy?
520
00:22:11,513 --> 00:22:12,514
What?
521
00:22:12,514 --> 00:22:14,016
You don't suppose this is all
522
00:22:14,516 --> 00:22:16,301
a horrible coincidence, do you?
523
00:22:16,301 --> 00:22:18,220
What do you mean?
524
00:22:18,220 --> 00:22:20,138
Well, all that Martian talk--
525
00:22:20,138 --> 00:22:22,641
people thinking they've seen
Martians.
526
00:22:22,641 --> 00:22:25,143
You don't suppose some real Martians
527
00:22:25,143 --> 00:22:26,645
decided to come down on Earth
528
00:22:27,145 --> 00:22:31,233
at the same time we pulled this
stunt, do you?
529
00:22:31,233 --> 00:22:34,236
Oh, that's silly...
530
00:22:34,236 --> 00:22:36,071
isn't it?
531
00:22:36,071 --> 00:22:36,988
I don't know.
532
00:22:37,489 --> 00:22:38,874
I just wish Fred was home.
533
00:22:38,874 --> 00:22:40,826
Gee, I wish Ricky was home, too.
534
00:22:41,326 --> 00:22:43,328
Oh, why did you have to say all that?
535
00:22:43,328 --> 00:22:46,214
Now I got a spooky feeling about
everything.
536
00:22:46,214 --> 00:22:48,166
Well, all those...
Oh, dear.
537
00:22:48,166 --> 00:22:50,669
(thumping and squealing)
538
00:22:50,669 --> 00:22:51,670
What's that?
539
00:22:52,170 --> 00:22:53,171
What's that?
540
00:22:53,171 --> 00:22:54,673
I don't know.
541
00:22:54,673 --> 00:22:57,175
(thumping and squealing continues)
542
00:22:59,678 --> 00:23:02,180
That's a horrible noise.
543
00:23:05,183 --> 00:23:07,686
(noise stops)
544
00:23:11,273 --> 00:23:13,275
(both screaming)
545
00:23:34,346 --> 00:23:36,014
Call the police.
546
00:23:36,014 --> 00:23:36,848
(screaming)
547
00:23:37,349 --> 00:23:38,850
Get the police.
548
00:23:41,353 --> 00:23:43,355
We can't call the police.
549
00:23:43,355 --> 00:23:44,773
Oh, no.
550
00:23:44,773 --> 00:23:47,526
We'd have to tell them the whole
story.
551
00:23:47,526 --> 00:23:49,861
We can't tell anyone about this.
552
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:55,367
"...and so, it's been firmly
established
553
00:23:55,367 --> 00:23:56,868
"that most of the reports
554
00:23:57,369 --> 00:23:59,404
"were the result of mass hysteria.
555
00:23:59,404 --> 00:24:01,373
"The only Martians anyone saw
556
00:24:01,873 --> 00:24:04,876
"were two on top of the Empire State
Building,
557
00:24:04,876 --> 00:24:06,244
"and it is suspected
558
00:24:06,244 --> 00:24:08,713
"that they might have had something
to do
559
00:24:08,713 --> 00:24:11,716
"with the opening tomorrow of a
motion picture
560
00:24:11,716 --> 00:24:13,218
"entitled Women From Mars.
561
00:24:13,218 --> 00:24:14,719
"So everybody relax.
562
00:24:14,719 --> 00:24:17,088
There has been no invasion by
Martians."
563
00:24:17,088 --> 00:24:18,089
FRED: Mm-hmm.
564
00:24:18,089 --> 00:24:19,474
Well, I don't know.
565
00:24:19,474 --> 00:24:21,176
Well, why do you say that, honey?
566
00:24:21,176 --> 00:24:23,345
Well, I've just got a funny feeling.
567
00:24:23,345 --> 00:24:25,847
Listen, by the way, you haven't said
much about this.
568
00:24:25,847 --> 00:24:29,234
Where were you when all this
excitement happened?
569
00:24:29,234 --> 00:24:31,236
Oh, we-we-we were out shopping
570
00:24:31,236 --> 00:24:33,238
and we didn't hear anything about it
571
00:24:33,238 --> 00:24:35,740
until we got home, did we, Ethel?
572
00:24:35,740 --> 00:24:37,742
No, no, we didn't hear anything about
it.
573
00:24:37,742 --> 00:24:39,744
Oh.
574
00:24:51,706 --> 00:24:52,707
Well, dinner's ready.
575
00:24:53,208 --> 00:24:53,708
Yes, sir.
It looks good
576
00:24:54,209 --> 00:24:54,709
Fine. Looks good.
577
00:24:55,210 --> 00:24:56,127
I hope that meat
578
00:24:56,127 --> 00:24:57,629
is cooked the way you like it, Fred.
579
00:24:57,629 --> 00:25:00,131
It looks delicious, Lucy.
Looks delicious.
580
00:25:00,131 --> 00:25:02,133
I kind of like to do things
581
00:25:02,133 --> 00:25:04,135
the way you like them, you know.
582
00:25:04,135 --> 00:25:05,136
You're a good cook.
583
00:25:05,136 --> 00:25:06,972
You're the champion hostess.
584
00:25:12,527 --> 00:25:15,480
(speaking gibberish)
585
00:25:32,297 --> 00:25:35,100
(I Love Lucy theme music playing)
586
00:25:45,610 --> 00:25:48,613
ANNOUNCER: The part of Cynthia
Harcourt was played by Mary Jane
Croft.
587
00:25:48,613 --> 00:25:50,115
Al Sparks was Herb Vigren.
588
00:25:50,115 --> 00:25:53,118
The couple on the roof were Dick
Elliot and Kaye Wiley.
589
00:26:30,121 --> 00:26:32,490
I Love Lucy is a Desilu Production.
590
00:26:32,991 --> 00:26:34,909
Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz
591
00:26:34,909 --> 00:26:38,280
will be back next week at this same
time.
39285
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