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Previously on "The Magicians"...
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We found a key, too.
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The ghost said it has the power
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to reveal things that are hidden.
I'm a hidden thing.
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I'm Hyman.
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When I first got stuck
in the Astral Plane,
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I spent months trying to push things.
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I never got anywhere.
Until I tried being the thing.
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Holy zerts! You did it!
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The farmers are hesitant because
you're asking them to throw out food
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- and replace it with, uh...
- Inedible mushrooms.
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I got it. I just need it done.
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On Earth we tend to meet the
people we're gonna marry first.
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Surely you've heard of the
Tribe of The Floating Mountain.
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[GASPS]
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It is my duty and honor
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to take the place of my late brother.
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- Why do you have magic?
- I don't know.
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I'd do anything to get it back.
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If I could give it to you, I would.
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What if you could?
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Whoo. Sorry.
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Okay.
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Last I checked,
we're looking for a spell,
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not starting an eBay store.
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There's this old hedge story
I once heard
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about some sort of electrical transfer.
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Marina used to steal magic
from some poor faun.
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People still talk about it.
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Just look.
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So, you want us to reverse engineer
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a hedge witch urban legend
using kids' toys?
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I mean, aluminum wiring's
been scant since the '90s,
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so unless you have a better idea.
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[TOYS CLACKING]
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[MUTTERING IN FARSI]
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Do you feel anything?
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No.
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Go again?
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♪ Oh, as long as I know ♪
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♪ How to love, I know I'll stay alive ♪
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Why did that just turn on by itself?
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Oh, my God.
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♪ I've got all my love to give ♪
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♪ And I'll survive ♪
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[GROANS] Give me your hand.
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Wait. Stop.
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Do not do this.
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Did you just use
that fish as a doorbell?
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I've been trying to warn you
guys for, like, an hour.
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"Being the fish button"
is the first thing
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in this entire room that's worked.
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- What are you trying to warn us about?
- This spell.
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I've seen it in person.
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Are you serious?
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Yeah.
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Couple months back
on a book-stealing job,
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I saw a group of
magically-starved idiots
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do the transfer, and by the end of it,
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everyone was on fire.
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Trust me. Fogg was right.
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It's a bad idea.
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Wait a minute. Did you
just say Fogg was right?
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- Aw, f...
- Fuck me.
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You have magic.
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And you're just now telling me?
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Don't take this the wrong way,
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but you've been a little drunk.
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- And unreliable.
- Yes.
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I'm drunk, but I am
entirely... reliable.
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[BOOKS CLATTERING]
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Um, maybe we should get back
to Marina's spell.
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It wasn't Marina's spell. It's mine.
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She stole it from my private collection.
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And if any of you had attended
my annual colloquia
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on prohibited magic, you would know
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that its proper name
is the Voltaic Transfer.
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It is incredibly delicate.
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- We... we know that, but...
- But what?
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00:03:34,130 --> 00:03:35,688
But you want to rid yourself
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of the one thing we all
so desperately want?
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- If you understood what...
- You understand.
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I'm a Magician with no magic.
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A dean without a school.
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Just a blind, unemployed
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black man in America.
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Which, shockingly, was actually
being kept 38% more tolerant
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through a series of enchantments
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which have now died.
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00:04:00,688 --> 00:04:02,915
In case you hadn't noticed
or perhaps maybe you weren't
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00:04:02,926 --> 00:04:04,958
- in a position to need to.
- Okay, you're really drunk.
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[LOUDLY] So what?
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00:04:07,730 --> 00:04:10,256
[QUIETLY] What does it matter?
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Alice, of all people,
you should know better
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than to attempt this.
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00:04:13,836 --> 00:04:16,546
You want to blow yourselves up?
Is that it? [WHEEZES]
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[SCOFFS]
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00:04:19,742 --> 00:04:22,509
Um. Just give me one second.
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Okay.
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00:04:27,183 --> 00:04:28,782
[EXHALES SLOWLY]
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Uh, they'll hold for a day or two,
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but then Alice can recharge them.
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After we finish the transfer.
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I know. Everything is fucked.
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- I'm sorry.
- It's not your fault.
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Julia.
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Yeah, well, it's not
not my fault, either so.
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What you two utter idiots need,
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if you don't want to die,
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is the flesh of a magical creature
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to act as a sort of semiconductor.
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A potent energy-drainer. An incubus.
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If this is about the whole
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marriage not being consummated yet,
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don't worry, it'll happen.
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00:05:33,916 --> 00:05:36,642
Oh, no, no, no.
You misunderstand me, my dear.
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You see, I've heard a rumor
about your advisor,
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the Pickwick?
Sighted in a certain corridor.
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Taking scrapings from the wall.
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00:05:43,626 --> 00:05:45,484
He's just a compulsive redecorator.
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00:05:45,494 --> 00:05:48,154
You might be interested to
know that we both have been
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plotting against our mutual friend.
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Hmm.
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No idea what you're talking about.
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[EXHALES] Margo.
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You can trust me.
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00:05:59,175 --> 00:06:01,133
The misguided actions of my son
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00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:04,837
have soured both sides
of our arrangement.
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00:06:04,848 --> 00:06:08,883
I've acquired a weapon forged
in the foundries of Stonehaven.
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00:06:09,653 --> 00:06:11,609
When the time is right,
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we could use it to kill the Fairy Queen.
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00:06:18,728 --> 00:06:21,854
- Hi.
- Oh, hell no.
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Move.
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Hang your sheets out
the window afterwards, dear.
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Guards! Guards!
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Don't even think about closing it. No!
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[SCREAMING] Guards!
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[POUNDING]
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Let me out!
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[EERIE MUSIC]
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♪ ♪
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- Synced and corrected by Shazi89 -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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I don't give a shit
if you have to find someone
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00:06:50,026 --> 00:06:51,584
to sell those shares short.
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I need them today.
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00:06:54,043 --> 00:06:56,259
[QUIETLY] So the Incubus
is a hedge fund manager?
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00:06:56,270 --> 00:06:59,458
Plus 5%. And not one more cent,
you piece of monkey shit.
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00:06:59,468 --> 00:07:01,527
Just remember what Fogg said.
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Be respectful, no matter what.
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You got two minutes.
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00:07:05,408 --> 00:07:07,767
Henry Fogg said that you might be able
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to help us power our spell.
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Uh, we just... we need
to use your thing.
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- My what?
- Uh, your... your thing.
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Your... your business.
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- Sorry?
- Uh.
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Your little friend.
Uh, I mean... your big friend.
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Well, I'm... I'm sure your friend
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is perfectly proportioned to your body.
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- I was just saying...
- Your penis.
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Yep, we need to use your penis
to power our spell.
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00:07:35,871 --> 00:07:37,730
And we know that you need it too.
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So that's why we'll build
the spell around it.
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It'll be completely painless
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and should only take a couple minutes.
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[WHEEZING]
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[LAUGHING]
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I can't believe that actually worked!
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Wha... what actually worked?
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I planted this joke on Fogg
25 years ago.
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I had him totally convinced
that I had a magic Johnson.
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Wait, so you...
you don't have a magic...
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Of course not.
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- That's ridiculous.
- No, it's not.
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I mean you're an incubus.
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Isn't sex, like, your thing?
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Gods no.
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I don't even like sex.
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00:08:17,813 --> 00:08:22,174
Stress is a much better way
to drain people's energy.
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00:08:22,184 --> 00:08:23,476
May I?
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[SNIFFING]
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[EXHALES LOUDLY]
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00:08:26,789 --> 00:08:28,781
[SNIFFS, EXHALES]
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[CHUCKLES MANIACALLY] Oh, and you.
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00:08:32,561 --> 00:08:35,020
You got a lot of it, I can tell.
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[SNIFFS]
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[EXHALES] Delish.
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[SNIFFLES] You give me
a few more hits of this,
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and I'll give you something
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that'll actually power your spell.
191
00:08:54,717 --> 00:08:57,143
- Is that your tail?
- Yeah.
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00:08:57,153 --> 00:08:58,886
Yeah, I grow a new one every spring.
193
00:09:02,024 --> 00:09:03,549
Welcome back.
194
00:09:03,559 --> 00:09:06,318
I see you've misplaced
your wife and child.
195
00:09:06,328 --> 00:09:09,788
You'd be shocked how easy
it is to misplace people
196
00:09:09,798 --> 00:09:12,958
when your mind's on
tax collection and annexation
197
00:09:12,968 --> 00:09:16,136
and unforeseen seafaring... confusion.
198
00:09:18,353 --> 00:09:20,412
I'll immediately sail
back out there and find them,
199
00:09:20,423 --> 00:09:22,001
- of course...
- No, you won't.
200
00:09:22,011 --> 00:09:24,670
I have a bigger problem
I need you to solve.
201
00:09:24,680 --> 00:09:28,507
The Stone Queen has locked
Margo and Fomar in the dungeon.
202
00:09:28,517 --> 00:09:30,709
Wait. What? Why?
203
00:09:30,719 --> 00:09:34,313
She thinks it will get
the marriage consummated,
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00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:37,249
but ultimately I need
the union officialized
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00:09:37,259 --> 00:09:39,018
just as much as the Floaters do.
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00:09:39,028 --> 00:09:40,853
Listen, pro tip.
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00:09:40,863 --> 00:09:42,988
Let Margo out of there immediately.
208
00:09:42,998 --> 00:09:45,191
You know her. Force isn't going to work.
209
00:09:45,201 --> 00:09:48,527
True. Force may not work.
210
00:09:48,537 --> 00:09:51,530
But the clever coercion on
the part of a trusted friend.
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00:09:51,540 --> 00:09:52,998
I am not going to coerce Margo
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00:09:53,008 --> 00:09:54,934
into having sex with a 15-year-old.
213
00:09:54,944 --> 00:09:56,495
Have you never heard of statutory rape?
214
00:09:56,506 --> 00:09:59,772
- Fomar isn't a statue.
- That is not what...
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00:09:59,782 --> 00:10:01,240
Forget it.
216
00:10:01,250 --> 00:10:03,943
You will solve this problem for me.
217
00:10:03,953 --> 00:10:05,452
And if I refuse?
218
00:10:08,857 --> 00:10:12,618
I've been searching for a new keepsake.
219
00:10:12,628 --> 00:10:14,553
Several bits will do.
220
00:10:14,563 --> 00:10:17,256
Fine, but I have a feeling Queen Margo
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00:10:17,266 --> 00:10:19,758
is going to be a little bit difficult.
222
00:10:19,768 --> 00:10:21,527
[BANGING]
223
00:10:21,537 --> 00:10:22,561
I know!
224
00:10:22,571 --> 00:10:24,663
You hate me for killing Micah.
225
00:10:24,673 --> 00:10:26,532
[GROANS] Jesus Christ.
226
00:10:26,542 --> 00:10:27,800
It's just in our culture,
227
00:10:27,810 --> 00:10:31,370
younger sons can't marry
or inherit property.
228
00:10:31,380 --> 00:10:33,239
Most of us wind up
229
00:10:33,249 --> 00:10:36,141
serving in the Crag Guard
or dying in battle.
230
00:10:36,151 --> 00:10:38,244
Is this supposed to make me
feel bad for you?
231
00:10:38,254 --> 00:10:40,179
No.
232
00:10:40,189 --> 00:10:41,580
So, do you want to take a break?
233
00:10:41,590 --> 00:10:43,182
Let me touch your maiden peaks?
234
00:10:43,193 --> 00:10:45,251
Do you want me to cut your
hands off and have them made
235
00:10:45,261 --> 00:10:46,819
into a decorative, whimsical planter?
236
00:10:46,829 --> 00:10:49,421
How are we supposed to become one flesh
237
00:10:49,431 --> 00:10:51,423
if you won't let me touch you?
238
00:10:51,433 --> 00:10:53,292
- We're not.
- But you're my wife.
239
00:10:53,302 --> 00:10:54,893
Oh, please.
240
00:10:54,903 --> 00:10:56,729
You don't need a wife.
241
00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,031
You need a pile of socks
and a sex-ed class.
242
00:10:59,041 --> 00:11:02,434
What's a sex class? Who... who's Ed?
243
00:11:02,444 --> 00:11:04,069
It's something they make you
do on Earth.
244
00:11:04,079 --> 00:11:05,412
It makes you never wanna.
245
00:11:07,516 --> 00:11:09,216
How about I show you?
246
00:11:16,025 --> 00:11:17,483
Vaginas.
247
00:11:17,493 --> 00:11:20,286
The leading cause of death in men.
248
00:11:20,296 --> 00:11:22,421
They spread disease.
249
00:11:22,431 --> 00:11:24,623
They explode during childbirth.
250
00:11:24,633 --> 00:11:26,292
[SLAPS BOOK, TURNS PAGE]
251
00:11:26,302 --> 00:11:29,662
But worst of all, they bleed.
Every month.
252
00:11:29,672 --> 00:11:32,498
In fact, mine's doing it right now.
253
00:11:32,508 --> 00:11:35,375
Well, that's okay. I like blood.
254
00:11:38,547 --> 00:11:40,614
But do you like teeth?
255
00:11:43,485 --> 00:11:45,811
[SIGHS] Sorry I'm late.
256
00:11:45,821 --> 00:11:47,179
You okay?
257
00:11:47,189 --> 00:11:49,548
Enjoying being a palace guard
in your own palace?
258
00:11:49,558 --> 00:11:51,650
This uniform is, like, really sweaty.
259
00:11:51,660 --> 00:11:53,786
Yeah, I know, but it beats
260
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:55,570
having the Fairy Queen's
hand up your ass.
261
00:11:55,581 --> 00:11:58,190
Last thing we need
is another puppet king.
262
00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:00,559
Okay, key quest. Hit me.
263
00:12:00,569 --> 00:12:03,462
Uh, okay, so I'm pretty sure that
264
00:12:03,472 --> 00:12:05,164
the fourth key is somewhere
265
00:12:05,174 --> 00:12:07,132
in this stretch of ocean
called The Abyss.
266
00:12:07,142 --> 00:12:09,468
Um, it's an uncharted region of Fillory
267
00:12:09,478 --> 00:12:13,138
where it's, like,
sort of permanently night.
268
00:12:13,148 --> 00:12:16,975
Um, but, you know, we get to go
269
00:12:16,985 --> 00:12:21,280
on a quest on a magical boat,
so it doesn't totally suck.
270
00:12:21,290 --> 00:12:24,383
Uh, yeah. I wish I could.
271
00:12:24,393 --> 00:12:27,252
Believe me, but duty calls
a dozen different ways.
272
00:12:27,262 --> 00:12:29,688
- And I can't leave Margo.
- Right, of course.
273
00:12:29,698 --> 00:12:31,824
- Sorry.
- No.
274
00:12:31,834 --> 00:12:34,226
I was looking forward to going
on a boating quest with you.
275
00:12:34,236 --> 00:12:35,902
Who wouldn't?
276
00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:40,099
Uh, think about it.
You can take Benedict.
277
00:12:40,109 --> 00:12:42,735
Go be life-partners with
someone else for a little bit.
278
00:12:42,745 --> 00:12:46,038
But you'll be able to do the...
thing on the prow of a ship
279
00:12:46,048 --> 00:12:47,706
you've been waiting
your whole life to do.
280
00:12:47,716 --> 00:12:50,784
- What thing?
- You know, the thing.
281
00:12:53,322 --> 00:12:56,315
[UPBEAT SYNTH MUSIC]
282
00:12:56,325 --> 00:13:03,330
♪ ♪
283
00:13:04,900 --> 00:13:07,367
Whoo!
284
00:13:09,772 --> 00:13:12,606
[IMITATES SWORD DRAW, CLANKING]
285
00:13:14,076 --> 00:13:16,176
Sorry. Uh, sorry.
286
00:13:21,283 --> 00:13:23,342
[DICE RATTLING]
287
00:13:23,352 --> 00:13:24,384
[DICE CLATTER]
288
00:13:25,921 --> 00:13:27,387
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
289
00:13:42,738 --> 00:13:46,064
Being on a mission is a hell
of an antidepressant.
290
00:13:46,074 --> 00:13:47,399
You notice that, Benedict?
291
00:13:47,409 --> 00:13:49,142
Well, now that you mention it.
292
00:13:51,380 --> 00:13:52,805
Whoa.
293
00:13:52,815 --> 00:13:54,514
We're entering The Abyss, Sire.
294
00:13:57,653 --> 00:14:00,520
It'll be darkness from here on.
295
00:14:03,792 --> 00:14:05,559
Thank you.
296
00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:08,261
[SHIP CREAKS]
297
00:14:16,939 --> 00:14:19,164
So how long until we can keep going?
298
00:14:19,174 --> 00:14:21,667
As soon as we find safe
passage, your Majesty.
299
00:14:21,677 --> 00:14:23,836
Is someone out there?
300
00:14:23,846 --> 00:14:25,445
Help!
301
00:14:27,316 --> 00:14:30,450
Is someone out there? Help!
302
00:14:34,990 --> 00:14:37,524
God, I think there's someone
out there on a raft.
303
00:14:38,193 --> 00:14:41,094
[GRUNTING]
304
00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:45,958
- [SIGHS]
- You okay?
305
00:14:45,968 --> 00:14:47,259
Wow, wow, wow.
306
00:14:47,269 --> 00:14:49,595
You just saved the shit out of me.
307
00:14:49,605 --> 00:14:51,363
[SIGHS] Poppy Kline.
308
00:14:51,373 --> 00:14:54,399
Draconologist, postgraduate
fellow, and field researcher
309
00:14:54,409 --> 00:14:56,468
at your service.
310
00:14:56,478 --> 00:14:59,813
Holy shit. You're from Brakebills?
311
00:15:00,983 --> 00:15:02,148
[SOFTLY] Yeah.
312
00:15:06,386 --> 00:15:08,646
So, Brakebills students
are kings and queens now?
313
00:15:08,656 --> 00:15:09,680
Yeah. So hu-Shit.now.
314
00:15:09,690 --> 00:15:12,016
I've stuck in The Abyss way too long.
315
00:15:12,026 --> 00:15:13,483
How did you end up out here anyway?
316
00:15:13,494 --> 00:15:15,124
Oh, I came with some other students.
317
00:15:15,135 --> 00:15:17,821
Oh. Hey, sorry. I can, um... uh.
318
00:15:17,831 --> 00:15:20,257
Spring Break, Class of 2016?
319
00:15:20,267 --> 00:15:21,659
Didn't turn out so well for us,
320
00:15:21,669 --> 00:15:23,727
but that is a whole nother story.
321
00:15:24,228 --> 00:15:25,451
Wait, sorry.
322
00:15:25,458 --> 00:15:26,682
- Do you know, um...
- [GASPS]
323
00:15:26,693 --> 00:15:28,561
If the next two words out
of your mouth are "Josh"
324
00:15:28,572 --> 00:15:30,420
and "Hoberman,"
we just became best friends.
325
00:15:30,431 --> 00:15:32,236
No way. He's still alive?
326
00:15:32,246 --> 00:15:34,505
I mean, as far as I know.
327
00:15:34,515 --> 00:15:36,106
Oh, that's amazing.
328
00:15:36,116 --> 00:15:38,008
So how does a Brakebills student
329
00:15:38,018 --> 00:15:40,511
wind up alone on a raft?
330
00:15:40,521 --> 00:15:43,414
Get a girl a drink.
I'll tell you the whole story.
331
00:15:43,424 --> 00:15:44,690
[MUTTERS] All right.
332
00:15:46,994 --> 00:15:50,020
[OMINOUS MUSIC]
333
00:15:50,030 --> 00:15:57,035
♪ ♪
334
00:15:58,205 --> 00:16:00,197
[CLEARS THROAT] Your Majesty.
335
00:16:00,207 --> 00:16:02,466
An urgent message
from Prince Ess of Loria.
336
00:16:02,476 --> 00:16:04,168
Wasn't Ess in the dungeon?
337
00:16:04,178 --> 00:16:05,536
High Queen Margo let him go
338
00:16:05,546 --> 00:16:06,971
as he was innocent of all charges.
339
00:16:06,981 --> 00:16:10,407
Oh, right. Yeah.
340
00:16:10,417 --> 00:16:11,783
Sorry about that.
341
00:16:16,690 --> 00:16:21,285
I figured out the problem.
Humans don't mate in captivity.
342
00:16:21,295 --> 00:16:24,121
What Margo and Fomar
need is a honeymoon.
343
00:16:24,131 --> 00:16:26,423
An hour's ride North, there is a forest
344
00:16:26,433 --> 00:16:28,592
with naturally-occurring aphrodisiacs
345
00:16:28,602 --> 00:16:31,328
that's guaranteed to get
that marriage consummated.
346
00:16:31,338 --> 00:16:33,564
[SIGHS] Fine.
347
00:16:33,574 --> 00:16:35,265
- But if you fail...
- I know, I know.
348
00:16:35,275 --> 00:16:37,635
New keepsakes. Fingers, ears.
349
00:16:37,645 --> 00:16:39,737
Try your spleen.
350
00:16:39,747 --> 00:16:41,647
- Okay.
- Go.
351
00:16:43,083 --> 00:16:45,776
Fieldwork was my thing at
Brakebills, and well, dragons.
352
00:16:45,786 --> 00:16:47,244
[SINGSONG] Love them.
353
00:16:47,254 --> 00:16:49,313
Wait, so what happened to your ship?
354
00:16:49,323 --> 00:16:50,914
Oh, wrecked.
355
00:16:50,924 --> 00:16:52,483
Off the coast of the Truthwaters.
356
00:16:52,493 --> 00:16:55,285
I spent two years on that little Picket.
357
00:16:55,295 --> 00:16:58,956
And, bam. [SNAPS FINGERS]
Over in an instant.
358
00:16:58,966 --> 00:17:01,191
That was three weeks ago.
359
00:17:01,201 --> 00:17:05,029
You survived for three weeks
on a raft by yourself?
360
00:17:05,039 --> 00:17:07,931
Yeah, it was rough.
361
00:17:07,941 --> 00:17:09,066
Especially without magic.
362
00:17:09,076 --> 00:17:10,701
Do you know anything about why the hell
363
00:17:10,711 --> 00:17:13,070
- it just went out?
- I mean, um...
364
00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:15,506
I just hope someone's fixing it.
365
00:17:15,516 --> 00:17:18,776
That someone is, um, sort of me.
366
00:17:18,786 --> 00:17:23,881
Um, I'm on a... a quest, right,
for these golden keys.
367
00:17:23,891 --> 00:17:25,382
Right, so there's seven of them.
368
00:17:25,392 --> 00:17:28,619
Wait, wait, wait, wait. Golden keys?
369
00:17:28,629 --> 00:17:30,028
Like...
370
00:17:33,333 --> 00:17:35,826
- Holy shit. How did you...
- Short version?
371
00:17:35,836 --> 00:17:37,461
Stole it.
372
00:17:37,471 --> 00:17:39,730
Mid-voyage we wound up
on this random island,
373
00:17:39,740 --> 00:17:42,199
just, like, covered in treasure.
374
00:17:42,209 --> 00:17:44,002
A dragon breeding ground
which is like...
375
00:17:44,013 --> 00:17:45,853
Spontaneous orgasm.
376
00:17:45,864 --> 00:17:47,671
I mean, places like this are so rare.
377
00:17:47,681 --> 00:17:49,339
There are only two species of dragon
378
00:17:49,349 --> 00:17:51,024
that even build treasure-nests.
379
00:17:51,035 --> 00:17:53,242
Anyway, this was in one of them
380
00:17:53,253 --> 00:17:54,836
with a bunch of cool stuff.
381
00:17:54,847 --> 00:17:57,663
But the thing that got me was
382
00:17:57,674 --> 00:17:59,633
I could feel something coming off it.
383
00:17:59,643 --> 00:18:01,757
- Yeah.
- Even now.
384
00:18:01,768 --> 00:18:04,117
It's somehow not dead, right?
385
00:18:04,663 --> 00:18:07,341
And, you know, the dragons were
all horny and distracted,
386
00:18:07,351 --> 00:18:09,343
so I just took it.
387
00:18:09,353 --> 00:18:10,780
Just like that?
388
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:13,213
I'm a person of questionable ethics.
389
00:18:13,223 --> 00:18:15,891
[CHUCKLES] Here.
390
00:18:16,792 --> 00:18:20,127
It's yours, from one quester to another.
391
00:18:22,132 --> 00:18:24,055
- Wow. Thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
392
00:18:24,066 --> 00:18:25,914
So do you know what it does?
I mean, each one
393
00:18:25,925 --> 00:18:27,894
sort of has a unique thing.
394
00:18:27,905 --> 00:18:29,508
I don't know.
395
00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:32,553
- Maybe you can figure it out.
- Yeah.
396
00:18:33,178 --> 00:18:36,303
Uh, here's to that.
397
00:18:36,313 --> 00:18:38,747
[BOTH LAUGHING]
398
00:18:41,652 --> 00:18:43,977
[SIGHS]
399
00:18:43,987 --> 00:18:45,877
- You wanna? Yeah.
- Oh.
400
00:18:49,359 --> 00:18:51,760
Okay. Well, here goes nothing.
401
00:18:54,398 --> 00:18:58,892
- [SIGHS]
- [SPEAKING IN FARSI]
402
00:18:58,902 --> 00:19:01,662
Ugh, man, one of your wires
is coming loose.
403
00:19:01,672 --> 00:19:03,497
You're gonna kill yourselves!
404
00:19:03,507 --> 00:19:07,000
- Oh, my God. I can't...
- Golly Moses.
405
00:19:07,010 --> 00:19:08,936
You're right. They're
gonna kill themselves.
406
00:19:08,946 --> 00:19:11,371
Don't you have some shower to go haunt?
407
00:19:11,381 --> 00:19:13,540
Oh, no one's showering right now.
408
00:19:13,550 --> 00:19:15,676
Except Fogg, and he's asleep.
409
00:19:15,686 --> 00:19:17,845
Jesus, that man needs help.
Is he all right?
410
00:19:17,855 --> 00:19:20,414
Ah, just a bit zozzled, I think.
411
00:19:20,424 --> 00:19:23,617
He was quite naked. [CHUCKLES]
412
00:19:23,627 --> 00:19:26,495
Remarkably... well-preserved.
413
00:19:27,798 --> 00:19:30,524
Guess it's possible to age gracefully.
414
00:19:30,534 --> 00:19:31,782
Oh, my God.
415
00:19:31,793 --> 00:19:33,774
Fuck, man. I can't watch this.
416
00:19:34,204 --> 00:19:36,864
See? This is what I love
about you, Penny.
417
00:19:36,874 --> 00:19:38,592
You act like you don't care,
418
00:19:38,603 --> 00:19:41,467
but really, you care most
in this whole story.
419
00:19:41,478 --> 00:19:43,570
Yeah, then... then why
is everyone acting
420
00:19:43,580 --> 00:19:45,486
like I'm not a part of it anymore?
421
00:19:45,512 --> 00:19:49,533
Maybe it's time to blouse
this popsicle stand.
422
00:19:49,953 --> 00:19:51,712
- You mean, leave?
- Why not?
423
00:19:51,722 --> 00:19:53,547
Go... go find a story to watch
424
00:19:53,557 --> 00:19:55,349
that doesn't make you so depressed.
425
00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:58,418
- [GASPING]
- Oh, I think they did it.
426
00:19:58,428 --> 00:20:00,095
[INHALES LOUDLY]
427
00:20:04,835 --> 00:20:07,060
I'm having a good time.
428
00:20:07,070 --> 00:20:08,303
Mm.
429
00:20:09,706 --> 00:20:11,398
[MURMURING]
430
00:20:11,408 --> 00:20:13,642
You just wait a second,
I'm gonna close...
431
00:20:21,084 --> 00:20:22,984
[GROANS SOFTLY]
432
00:20:38,051 --> 00:20:39,885
Rise and shine, princess.
433
00:20:41,155 --> 00:20:43,080
[STAMMERING] Who?
434
00:20:43,090 --> 00:20:45,149
The real question, dipshit,
is how you managed
435
00:20:45,159 --> 00:20:46,846
to black out after, what, five drinks?
436
00:20:46,857 --> 00:20:48,666
Why do you always have
to embarrass yourself?
437
00:20:48,677 --> 00:20:49,825
I don't...
438
00:20:50,731 --> 00:20:53,391
Okay. Uh...
439
00:20:53,401 --> 00:20:55,986
Um... [STAMMERING]
440
00:20:57,038 --> 00:20:58,763
Seriously.
441
00:20:58,773 --> 00:21:01,507
You hold your liquor
like a kindergartner.
442
00:21:02,777 --> 00:21:04,402
[SIGHS]
443
00:21:04,412 --> 00:21:07,813
Sorry, um, can you... are
you... are you seeing this?
444
00:21:10,151 --> 00:21:11,309
Nobody cares, dude.
445
00:21:11,319 --> 00:21:14,145
They all have actual jobs, unlike you.
446
00:21:14,155 --> 00:21:15,946
Right, okay.
447
00:21:15,956 --> 00:21:17,489
No problem.
448
00:21:23,331 --> 00:21:25,489
- What the fuck did you do?
- Okay, I can explain.
449
00:21:25,499 --> 00:21:27,491
- What is this key?
- Just calm down.
450
00:21:27,501 --> 00:21:29,694
- It's all right.
- There's another me.
451
00:21:29,704 --> 00:21:31,996
And he's mean,
and no one else can see him.
452
00:21:32,006 --> 00:21:33,698
Nothing about this is all right.
453
00:21:33,708 --> 00:21:35,715
Okay, listen. Here's the deal.
454
00:21:35,726 --> 00:21:37,871
- The key does have a power.
- No shit.
455
00:21:37,882 --> 00:21:39,803
It takes the darkest parts of you
456
00:21:39,814 --> 00:21:42,973
and makes a... kind of...
well, you met it.
457
00:21:42,983 --> 00:21:46,344
It's kind of like a depression monster?
458
00:21:46,354 --> 00:21:50,081
Looks like you, talks like you.
459
00:21:50,091 --> 00:21:53,284
But don't worry, it can't
actually hurt you.
460
00:21:53,294 --> 00:21:55,319
- Unless...
- Unless?
461
00:21:55,329 --> 00:21:56,420
Unless it gets in your head
462
00:21:56,430 --> 00:21:58,022
and convinces you to hurt yourself.
463
00:21:58,032 --> 00:21:59,627
- Well...
- But you'll be fine.
464
00:21:59,638 --> 00:22:01,791
It only affects the last person
who touched the key.
465
00:22:01,802 --> 00:22:03,861
So just pass it along to someone else.
466
00:22:03,871 --> 00:22:06,997
- That's what we did.
- Who's we?
467
00:22:07,007 --> 00:22:08,332
My former shipmates.
468
00:22:08,342 --> 00:22:09,428
After I stole the key,
469
00:22:09,439 --> 00:22:10,901
we passed it from person to person
470
00:22:10,911 --> 00:22:14,138
until we, you know, ran out of options.
471
00:22:14,148 --> 00:22:16,407
What does that mean,
you ran out of options?
472
00:22:16,417 --> 00:22:19,412
Um. Hit an iceberg?
473
00:22:19,423 --> 00:22:21,211
I happened to be holding
the key when we sank
474
00:22:21,222 --> 00:22:23,514
'cause the rest of 'em
just couldn't handle it.
475
00:22:23,524 --> 00:22:25,182
You have to be, like, a badass about it,
476
00:22:25,192 --> 00:22:27,084
and what can I say?
477
00:22:27,094 --> 00:22:28,886
- They were weak.
- Okay, I'm sorry.
478
00:22:28,896 --> 00:22:32,056
Exactly how many of them
survived the key before you?
479
00:22:32,066 --> 00:22:34,425
Eh. Maybe, like, half?
480
00:22:34,435 --> 00:22:36,527
This key made half of your shipmates
481
00:22:36,537 --> 00:22:38,863
kill themselves, and you gave it to me?
482
00:22:38,873 --> 00:22:40,731
Yeah. [CHUCKLES] But don't worry.
483
00:22:40,741 --> 00:22:43,768
They were all pretty
psychologically damaged already.
484
00:22:43,778 --> 00:22:45,936
You'll be fine.
You're so happy and positive.
485
00:22:45,946 --> 00:22:49,039
Mmmm, no. No, no.
486
00:22:49,049 --> 00:22:51,275
I'm not. This is like... [STAMMERING]
487
00:22:51,285 --> 00:22:52,710
It's like we're on a boat, okay?
488
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:54,412
This is not how I usually am.
489
00:22:54,422 --> 00:22:56,213
You're usually
a wet blanket, self-pitying,
490
00:22:56,223 --> 00:22:57,248
party pooping dickwad.
491
00:22:57,258 --> 00:22:59,517
Shut up!
492
00:22:59,527 --> 00:23:01,719
You better pass that along fast.
493
00:23:01,729 --> 00:23:04,321
What? No! Not if there is a 50%
494
00:23:04,331 --> 00:23:05,823
chance of it killing the next person.
495
00:23:05,833 --> 00:23:07,858
[STAMMERING]
496
00:23:07,868 --> 00:23:10,261
Okay.
497
00:23:10,271 --> 00:23:12,897
Right, yep. I'll just hold on to it.
498
00:23:12,907 --> 00:23:14,965
Until we get back to Whitespire.
499
00:23:14,975 --> 00:23:17,001
- I can do that.
- Your choice.
500
00:23:17,011 --> 00:23:18,702
I mean, we're stuck in The Abyss
501
00:23:18,712 --> 00:23:19,837
till we found our way out.
502
00:23:19,847 --> 00:23:22,706
It could be days. It could be weeks.
503
00:23:22,716 --> 00:23:24,742
Oh, but hey. Don't stress.
504
00:23:24,752 --> 00:23:27,411
- You might be fine.
- You won't be.
505
00:23:27,421 --> 00:23:29,280
You know what?
506
00:23:29,290 --> 00:23:32,283
I have come up against you
before, asshole.
507
00:23:32,293 --> 00:23:34,718
Maybe a little more subtly,
but you and I both know
508
00:23:34,728 --> 00:23:36,253
that I've got a black belt.
509
00:23:36,263 --> 00:23:37,696
So come at me.
510
00:23:42,106 --> 00:23:43,692
The problem is your hair.
511
00:23:43,703 --> 00:23:45,470
I know you're just trying
to hide your face,
512
00:23:45,481 --> 00:23:47,498
but it really only makes it worse.
513
00:23:47,508 --> 00:23:49,099
Seriously, have you ever noticed
514
00:23:49,109 --> 00:23:50,734
that your face sort of
looks like a foot?
515
00:23:50,744 --> 00:23:52,303
If feet had frown lines?
516
00:23:52,313 --> 00:23:54,405
I mean, you're definitely
aging prematurely,
517
00:23:54,415 --> 00:23:57,308
which is a symptom
of early-onset Alzheimer's.
518
00:23:57,318 --> 00:23:59,977
Which, funny,
both your grandparents had.
519
00:23:59,987 --> 00:24:02,913
And you will definitely get it
so then you'll be
520
00:24:02,923 --> 00:24:04,615
a senile frowny foot-face.
521
00:24:04,625 --> 00:24:06,925
Jesus. Fuck.
522
00:24:08,696 --> 00:24:12,064
This is pointless. You can't run me off.
523
00:24:13,167 --> 00:24:15,334
You can't eat me off.
524
00:24:16,136 --> 00:24:18,537
You can't drink me off.
525
00:24:19,473 --> 00:24:22,466
You can't jerk me off.
526
00:24:22,476 --> 00:24:23,834
God, you're so vulgar.
527
00:24:23,844 --> 00:24:26,637
We had a thing going,
and you... you made it
528
00:24:26,647 --> 00:24:28,472
unnecessarily gross.
529
00:24:28,482 --> 00:24:32,176
You sick of the shallow, petty stuff?
530
00:24:32,186 --> 00:24:34,545
I get it.
531
00:24:34,555 --> 00:24:36,413
The thing is, I start on the outside,
532
00:24:36,423 --> 00:24:38,716
and I work my way into the core.
533
00:24:38,726 --> 00:24:42,319
The part of you
that kept magic from Julia
534
00:24:42,329 --> 00:24:43,721
when you could have helped her,
535
00:24:43,731 --> 00:24:46,588
that is what set her on that path.
536
00:24:46,599 --> 00:24:50,958
You got your best friend
sexually assaulted.
537
00:24:50,969 --> 00:24:53,521
And let's talk about
what happened to Alice.
538
00:24:53,532 --> 00:24:54,614
You ruined her.
539
00:24:54,625 --> 00:24:57,513
And she is never going to be
the girl that she was.
540
00:24:57,524 --> 00:25:00,080
You killed her,
and she is never coming back.
541
00:25:00,091 --> 00:25:04,208
How many people have to pay
the price for your heroics?
542
00:25:04,219 --> 00:25:05,778
Just stop!
543
00:25:05,789 --> 00:25:08,513
You are willing to destroy
everyone around you
544
00:25:08,524 --> 00:25:10,724
to find something
that makes you feel okay.
545
00:25:10,735 --> 00:25:12,982
But you are never gonna feel okay.
546
00:25:12,993 --> 00:25:15,753
No, stop. You're trying
to get in my head.
547
00:25:15,763 --> 00:25:17,229
Quentin.
548
00:25:18,819 --> 00:25:20,511
I am your head.
549
00:25:20,701 --> 00:25:23,602
You know I'm right because I am you.
550
00:25:29,076 --> 00:25:33,337
- To Mr. and Mrs...
- Fomar.
551
00:25:33,347 --> 00:25:35,606
Fomar.
552
00:25:35,616 --> 00:25:37,182
Bottoms up.
553
00:25:38,309 --> 00:25:42,580
Uh, in my culture,
the woman always drinks first.
554
00:25:42,590 --> 00:25:45,783
- Drink the wine, Margo.
- I don't wanna drink the wine.
555
00:25:45,793 --> 00:25:47,934
What I wanted was for you
to handle this, Eliot.
556
00:25:47,952 --> 00:25:49,744
You'll feel better if you just
557
00:25:49,755 --> 00:25:52,864
drink the wine, Margo.
558
00:26:01,408 --> 00:26:03,642
[COUGHING]
559
00:26:04,411 --> 00:26:07,004
So, um...
560
00:26:07,014 --> 00:26:09,443
Do we have sex in the carriage?
561
00:26:09,454 --> 00:26:12,275
Or do we have sex outside?
562
00:26:12,286 --> 00:26:16,413
- Or do...
- I'm not having sex with you.
563
00:26:16,423 --> 00:26:19,883
You psychotic fetus.
564
00:26:19,893 --> 00:26:21,460
Ever.
565
00:26:29,670 --> 00:26:31,829
Either I just killed him with my rage
566
00:26:31,839 --> 00:26:33,263
or you drugged his wine.
567
00:26:33,273 --> 00:26:35,099
And to think... [SIGHS]
568
00:26:35,109 --> 00:26:36,908
- You doubted me.
- To think.
569
00:26:38,545 --> 00:26:42,973
I just spent three days locked
in a dungeon with him.
570
00:26:42,983 --> 00:26:45,209
Okay. Yes, and that sucks.
571
00:26:45,219 --> 00:26:47,745
But we have a problem,
possibly much bigger
572
00:26:47,755 --> 00:26:49,419
than sleeping beauty over here.
573
00:26:49,430 --> 00:26:51,815
The fairies are up to something
in the Northern Orchards.
574
00:26:51,825 --> 00:26:53,784
They evacuated the villagers weeks ago
575
00:26:53,794 --> 00:26:55,953
and haven't let another human in since.
576
00:26:55,963 --> 00:26:59,323
Except Ess came through
on his way from Loria,
577
00:26:59,333 --> 00:27:01,392
and he saw some crazy shit.
578
00:27:01,402 --> 00:27:03,927
Rivers running red,
three-eyed fanged toads,
579
00:27:03,937 --> 00:27:06,864
mutant plant life, Chernobyl-level shit.
580
00:27:06,874 --> 00:27:09,867
I think the fairies might
be poisoning the ecosystem.
581
00:27:09,877 --> 00:27:13,437
Great, well, now I can't be mad at you.
582
00:27:13,447 --> 00:27:14,880
Thanks.
583
00:27:14,891 --> 00:27:16,755
I know, I wanted to fight, too,
584
00:27:16,766 --> 00:27:19,043
so that we could make up
and on the other side of it,
585
00:27:19,053 --> 00:27:21,712
- we could just...
- Be us again?
586
00:27:21,722 --> 00:27:23,714
Who are we now, El?
587
00:27:23,724 --> 00:27:25,149
We used to be glamorous,
588
00:27:25,159 --> 00:27:27,885
amazing mega-bitches.
589
00:27:27,895 --> 00:27:29,453
And now?
590
00:27:29,463 --> 00:27:33,824
We have depth and character.
591
00:27:33,834 --> 00:27:36,860
Let's decide... we'll find us again
592
00:27:36,870 --> 00:27:39,163
once we're done saving Fillory.
593
00:27:39,173 --> 00:27:40,472
Okay?
594
00:27:42,743 --> 00:27:44,234
Duty calls.
595
00:27:44,244 --> 00:27:46,144
Let's go see about these orchards.
596
00:27:51,919 --> 00:27:54,453
Which are...
597
00:27:58,158 --> 00:28:00,292
No longer here.
598
00:28:05,666 --> 00:28:07,592
Nothing is going to save you.
599
00:28:07,602 --> 00:28:08,960
Not Brakebills.
600
00:28:08,970 --> 00:28:11,930
Not Fillory. Not a quest.
601
00:28:11,940 --> 00:28:14,666
Just do it.
602
00:28:14,676 --> 00:28:16,668
Kill yourself.
603
00:28:16,678 --> 00:28:19,571
Make it stop.
604
00:28:19,581 --> 00:28:21,481
You know the way out.
605
00:28:32,461 --> 00:28:33,919
King Quentin, no!
606
00:28:33,929 --> 00:28:36,054
Oh, no, I wasn't. I was just...
607
00:28:36,064 --> 00:28:37,789
- I thought I saw something.
- Your Majesty,
608
00:28:37,799 --> 00:28:40,492
if I may, I understand
what you're contemplating.
609
00:28:40,502 --> 00:28:42,761
I thought about it too.
610
00:28:42,771 --> 00:28:46,364
Though I've never spoken
about it, of course.
611
00:28:46,374 --> 00:28:48,133
Why not?
612
00:28:48,143 --> 00:28:52,170
Well, you know what parents
teach you about emotions.
613
00:28:52,180 --> 00:28:57,209
That you should bottle them up
and never talk about them
614
00:28:57,219 --> 00:29:00,946
and turn them into, um,
maps, for example.
615
00:29:00,956 --> 00:29:03,215
Jesus, Benedict.
616
00:29:03,225 --> 00:29:05,016
Okay, we should talk about this.
617
00:29:05,026 --> 00:29:07,018
If it please you, Sire, but first,
618
00:29:07,028 --> 00:29:09,128
why don't we step away
from the edge of the boat?
619
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:15,627
Yeah. I don't really trust
myself right now.
620
00:29:15,637 --> 00:29:20,365
You know, in old days,
when sailors would go mad,
621
00:29:20,375 --> 00:29:21,867
the crew would tie them to the mast.
622
00:29:21,877 --> 00:29:23,435
[LAUGHS] Isn't that funny?
623
00:29:23,445 --> 00:29:25,604
Oh, my God. Tie me to the mast.
624
00:29:25,614 --> 00:29:26,980
[LAUGHS]
625
00:29:29,050 --> 00:29:32,043
- No... no, Your Majesty.
- No, do it.
626
00:29:32,053 --> 00:29:34,679
Okay, swear to me, no matter what I say,
627
00:29:34,689 --> 00:29:38,750
that you will not untie me
until we get to Whitespire.
628
00:29:38,760 --> 00:29:42,254
Very well. I won't.
629
00:29:42,264 --> 00:29:43,863
Thank you.
630
00:30:11,526 --> 00:30:13,426
It worked.
631
00:30:15,297 --> 00:30:17,856
Thank you.
632
00:30:17,866 --> 00:30:20,099
[BOTH LAUGH]
633
00:31:07,582 --> 00:31:11,109
Oh. I see the transfer worked.
634
00:31:11,119 --> 00:31:14,312
It's still small, I can feel
that, but I'm gonna grow it.
635
00:31:14,322 --> 00:31:16,681
I hope you'll be careful.
636
00:31:16,691 --> 00:31:19,517
I will be.
637
00:31:19,527 --> 00:31:23,521
You know that fixing my glasses
638
00:31:23,531 --> 00:31:25,757
won't fix me.
639
00:31:25,767 --> 00:31:27,659
Yeah, but they make all of this
640
00:31:27,669 --> 00:31:30,003
one speck less shitty. [TAPS DESK]
641
00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:37,268
[GROANS]
642
00:31:37,278 --> 00:31:39,278
It smells like the fairy realm.
643
00:31:40,815 --> 00:31:42,607
We're so far North.
644
00:31:42,617 --> 00:31:45,443
The climate should be cold
and dry, not hot and moist.
645
00:31:45,453 --> 00:31:47,979
Yeah, well, they're such
moisture freaks.
646
00:31:47,989 --> 00:31:51,549
All that spritzing and bathing.
647
00:31:51,559 --> 00:31:53,885
You know, it's... it's like
they're afraid
648
00:31:53,895 --> 00:31:56,763
to dry out in Fillory or something.
649
00:31:58,833 --> 00:32:00,933
Oh, my God.
650
00:32:02,404 --> 00:32:05,330
The fuckers are terraforming.
651
00:32:05,340 --> 00:32:07,966
They're turning our kingdom
into a mushroom steam bath.
652
00:32:07,976 --> 00:32:09,801
- That is not okay.
- No.
653
00:32:09,811 --> 00:32:11,277
Definitely not.
654
00:32:13,481 --> 00:32:16,007
That mushroom just moved.
655
00:32:16,017 --> 00:32:18,217
- Really?
- Should I pluck it?
656
00:32:20,722 --> 00:32:22,147
I'm... I'm gonna do it.
657
00:32:22,157 --> 00:32:23,823
Mm. Margo, don't.
658
00:32:30,231 --> 00:32:32,432
- [GASPS]
- Oh.
659
00:32:34,202 --> 00:32:36,828
- [GROANS]
- Uh.
660
00:32:36,838 --> 00:32:39,272
It's a fairy embryo.
661
00:32:40,375 --> 00:32:42,701
- Really?
- These are eggs, El.
662
00:32:42,711 --> 00:32:44,102
I mean, really?
663
00:32:44,112 --> 00:32:45,937
The fairies aren't just terraforming.
664
00:32:45,947 --> 00:32:48,173
They're growing an army.
665
00:32:48,183 --> 00:32:49,515
Oh, fuck.
666
00:32:51,330 --> 00:32:54,391
I think these fairies might
actually qualify as Big Bads.
667
00:32:54,401 --> 00:32:56,259
I mean, think about all the crazy shit
668
00:32:56,269 --> 00:32:57,594
they've kept us busy with.
669
00:32:57,604 --> 00:33:01,598
Earthworms, adolescent
slug mash, turtle semen.
670
00:33:01,608 --> 00:33:04,534
This is all just
a thin frosting of whimsy
671
00:33:04,544 --> 00:33:07,704
on a cupcake of conspiracy.
672
00:33:07,714 --> 00:33:11,074
No, no, no, no, no, no.
This is a full-scale invasion.
673
00:33:11,084 --> 00:33:13,610
We need a plan bigger than just
assassinating the Queen.
674
00:33:13,620 --> 00:33:17,280
We need... we need... we
need... we need... we need...
675
00:33:17,290 --> 00:33:20,258
We need... Margo?
676
00:33:21,928 --> 00:33:24,388
- Margo?
- [PANTING]
677
00:33:24,398 --> 00:33:26,223
Kidnapping. Hostages. Leverage.
678
00:33:26,233 --> 00:33:28,925
- Don't ask questions, go! Go!
- What the fuck?
679
00:33:28,935 --> 00:33:31,102
Go, go!
680
00:33:41,048 --> 00:33:43,040
It's a bitch, right?
681
00:33:43,050 --> 00:33:45,075
Imagine being stuck
on a raft with that thing.
682
00:33:45,085 --> 00:33:46,410
Have you tried distracting it?
683
00:33:46,420 --> 00:33:49,646
For some reason, mine
was really into seagulls.
684
00:33:49,656 --> 00:33:51,415
Wonder if that's because
I'm into seagulls?
685
00:33:51,425 --> 00:33:53,150
Please, fuck off.
686
00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:55,585
Look, I'm sorry I passed you the key.
687
00:33:55,595 --> 00:33:57,087
I really thought you could handle it.
688
00:33:57,097 --> 00:33:58,922
This is me handling it.
689
00:33:58,932 --> 00:34:01,925
No, no, you're right.
690
00:34:01,935 --> 00:34:04,227
I wish we'd thought of tying
ourselves up.
691
00:34:04,237 --> 00:34:06,596
That first day,
we passed it around randomly.
692
00:34:06,606 --> 00:34:08,565
That killed three of us off quick.
693
00:34:08,575 --> 00:34:10,300
Called it Bloody Tuesday.
694
00:34:10,310 --> 00:34:12,402
We figured out it affects
some people right away.
695
00:34:12,412 --> 00:34:14,245
Others, it takes time to wear down.
696
00:34:17,651 --> 00:34:20,477
You want me to take the key for a while?
Give you some relief?
697
00:34:20,487 --> 00:34:22,846
No.
698
00:34:22,856 --> 00:34:25,415
I don't trust you not
to pass it on to someone else.
699
00:34:25,425 --> 00:34:27,751
And I need it.
700
00:34:27,761 --> 00:34:29,820
- For the quest.
- Fine.
701
00:34:29,830 --> 00:34:32,022
Be a suffer-martyr.
702
00:34:32,032 --> 00:34:33,757
Look, the keys don't
just make you suffer.
703
00:34:33,767 --> 00:34:35,826
They help sometimes, too.
704
00:34:35,836 --> 00:34:39,096
Like with the keyholes
and shit like that.
705
00:34:39,106 --> 00:34:40,597
Keyholes, like...
706
00:34:40,607 --> 00:34:44,201
Like in the walls or clocks.
707
00:34:44,211 --> 00:34:46,369
- Don't ask me how it works.
- [STAMMERING]
708
00:34:46,379 --> 00:34:48,705
So... so where do the keyholes go?
709
00:34:48,715 --> 00:34:52,476
To Earth or the Neitherlands
or wherever.
710
00:34:52,486 --> 00:34:54,686
Wait, wait. Are you serious?
711
00:35:00,184 --> 00:35:01,528
Stop it. What are you doing?
712
00:35:01,539 --> 00:35:03,267
I've been stuck here in
Fillory this whole time
713
00:35:03,278 --> 00:35:04,588
when I could have gone home?
714
00:35:04,598 --> 00:35:07,190
Hey. No, Poppy, stop it.
715
00:35:07,200 --> 00:35:09,793
Poppy, no. Stop.
716
00:35:09,803 --> 00:35:12,229
Poppy!
717
00:35:12,239 --> 00:35:14,431
I told you
you should've killed yourself.
718
00:35:14,441 --> 00:35:15,940
[SIGHS]
719
00:35:17,310 --> 00:35:19,077
Okay.
720
00:35:21,739 --> 00:35:24,802
Okay, we just have one
outstanding problem.
721
00:35:24,813 --> 00:35:26,543
You kind of still need
to fuck your husband.
722
00:35:26,553 --> 00:35:28,753
Don't worry. I got this.
723
00:35:33,527 --> 00:35:37,854
Let's just say Ess was right
about the toads in these parts.
724
00:35:37,864 --> 00:35:41,091
- They've got three eyes?
- No, baby.
725
00:35:41,101 --> 00:35:42,934
They've got fangs.
726
00:35:45,105 --> 00:35:47,631
[MOANING]
727
00:35:47,641 --> 00:35:49,432
[GROANS SOFTLY]
728
00:35:49,442 --> 00:35:52,369
Oh! Oh, something bit my manhood.
729
00:35:52,379 --> 00:35:54,437
Congratulations, son. You just had sex.
730
00:35:54,447 --> 00:35:56,339
The first time's always painful.
731
00:35:56,349 --> 00:35:58,608
It's all those teeth
they've got down there.
732
00:35:58,618 --> 00:36:02,245
But, hey, you were amazing.
733
00:36:02,255 --> 00:36:04,447
What?
734
00:36:04,457 --> 00:36:06,157
I like to watch.
735
00:36:07,727 --> 00:36:10,086
Wanna go again?
736
00:36:10,096 --> 00:36:12,289
Hmm?
737
00:36:12,299 --> 00:36:14,324
Benedict!
738
00:36:14,334 --> 00:36:17,260
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
739
00:36:17,270 --> 00:36:19,796
Benedict, help!
740
00:36:19,806 --> 00:36:21,544
- Your Majesty?
- Oh, my God, Benedict.
741
00:36:21,555 --> 00:36:23,818
- Okay, untie me.
- Sire, you said not to untie you.
742
00:36:23,829 --> 00:36:26,303
No. No, no, no, no, no. Please, come on.
Okay, look.
743
00:36:26,313 --> 00:36:27,871
I'm not trying to kill myself.
744
00:36:27,881 --> 00:36:29,773
Poppy took the key, and she is trying
745
00:36:29,783 --> 00:36:31,308
to use it to get back to Earth.
746
00:36:31,318 --> 00:36:33,176
Just... okay, go find her yourself.
747
00:36:33,186 --> 00:36:35,779
Just whatever you do, do not
let her leave with that key.
748
00:36:35,789 --> 00:36:37,021
Yes, Your Majesty.
749
00:36:38,792 --> 00:36:40,225
God.
750
00:36:43,663 --> 00:36:45,255
No! Stop!
751
00:36:45,265 --> 00:36:48,066
[GRUNTING]
752
00:36:48,902 --> 00:36:49,940
[GROANS]
753
00:36:56,743 --> 00:36:59,544
- Hey, did you get it?
- I'm sorry, Your Majesty.
754
00:37:01,448 --> 00:37:03,607
I'm a terrible failure.
755
00:37:03,617 --> 00:37:05,850
Okay. It's okay.
756
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:08,720
We'll get the key back somehow.
757
00:37:16,596 --> 00:37:18,162
Benedict.
758
00:37:21,468 --> 00:37:23,860
Hey, hey. Benedict.
759
00:37:23,870 --> 00:37:25,762
Whoa, Benedict, no. Hey, listen.
760
00:37:25,772 --> 00:37:29,466
Whatever it's telling you
to do, do not do it.
761
00:37:29,476 --> 00:37:31,835
I'm sorry.
762
00:37:31,845 --> 00:37:33,177
Benedict, no!
763
00:37:44,457 --> 00:37:46,791
Mm. Yummy.
764
00:37:48,094 --> 00:37:49,394
Oh.
765
00:37:54,582 --> 00:37:57,016
[HUMMING]
766
00:37:59,978 --> 00:38:01,938
♪ Oh, as long as I know how to love? ♪
767
00:38:01,957 --> 00:38:03,114
[FISH THRASHING]
768
00:38:03,124 --> 00:38:04,482
♪ I know I'll stay alive ♪
769
00:38:04,492 --> 00:38:06,351
♪ I've got all my life to live ♪
770
00:38:06,361 --> 00:38:08,453
♪ I've got all my love to give ♪
771
00:38:08,463 --> 00:38:12,123
♪ And I'll survive, hey, hey ♪
772
00:38:12,133 --> 00:38:13,780
Penny, what's wrong?
773
00:38:13,799 --> 00:38:15,780
- Just saying goodbye.
- What?
774
00:38:16,137 --> 00:38:18,116
Goodbye? Where are you going?
775
00:38:18,127 --> 00:38:19,519
Just away.
776
00:38:19,530 --> 00:38:21,622
Away... wait.
777
00:38:22,010 --> 00:38:25,176
Fuck, I hate this thing.
Um. I don't understand.
778
00:38:25,187 --> 00:38:26,971
Is this because
of what happened with Kady?
779
00:38:26,982 --> 00:38:28,340
- No.
- Okay.
780
00:38:28,350 --> 00:38:29,708
Is it because we did the transfer?
781
00:38:29,718 --> 00:38:31,860
No. Look, I gotta go.
782
00:38:31,871 --> 00:38:33,612
Wait, will you just
talk to me for a second?
783
00:38:33,622 --> 00:38:36,147
You know what,
we barely know each other.
784
00:38:36,157 --> 00:38:39,017
Don't suddenly act like
you care just 'cause I'm going.
785
00:38:39,027 --> 00:38:40,221
I'm not acting.
786
00:38:40,232 --> 00:38:43,299
I do care. I don't want to see you go.
I don't want to see you give up.
787
00:38:43,310 --> 00:38:45,636
- Give up?
- Yeah.
788
00:38:45,647 --> 00:38:49,841
You're the one who had magic,
and you gave it away.
789
00:38:49,852 --> 00:38:52,712
What's your plan? Go back to law school?
790
00:38:52,723 --> 00:38:54,598
Live off your trust fund?
791
00:38:54,609 --> 00:38:57,202
Actually, no, my plan
was to take five minutes
792
00:38:57,212 --> 00:38:59,532
and try to remember what life was like
793
00:38:59,543 --> 00:39:01,902
without a god or a quest.
794
00:39:01,913 --> 00:39:03,775
Or some dead asshole bothering me.
795
00:39:03,785 --> 00:39:05,410
And, I don't know, frankly beyond that,
796
00:39:05,420 --> 00:39:06,811
it's none of your business.
797
00:39:06,821 --> 00:39:09,581
'Cause you have nothing beyond that.
798
00:39:09,591 --> 00:39:10,849
[DOOR SHUTS]
799
00:39:10,859 --> 00:39:12,625
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
800
00:39:15,797 --> 00:39:17,830
Penny wants to say goodbye.
801
00:39:19,567 --> 00:39:23,795
- You're leaving?
- I can't do this anymore.
802
00:39:23,805 --> 00:39:27,573
I can't be a ghost person
in my own life, okay?
803
00:39:31,546 --> 00:39:34,773
Why don't I just make you a new body?
804
00:39:34,783 --> 00:39:36,516
Like Mayakovsky did for me.
805
00:39:54,669 --> 00:39:56,461
- [GASPS]
- A-plus job
806
00:39:56,471 --> 00:39:59,230
getting rid of me, gorgeous.
807
00:39:59,240 --> 00:40:01,145
Is this just a dream?
808
00:40:01,156 --> 00:40:04,116
That time you fell out
of a tree when you were 12.
809
00:40:04,411 --> 00:40:08,840
The bone in your arm healed
in six little weeks.
810
00:40:08,850 --> 00:40:11,351
How come your fear of heights never did?
811
00:40:16,624 --> 00:40:18,358
I'm not the bone.
812
00:40:19,594 --> 00:40:21,728
I'm the terror.
813
00:40:23,131 --> 00:40:26,291
I do love how you keep trying.
814
00:40:26,301 --> 00:40:32,831
And trying. And trying.
815
00:40:32,841 --> 00:40:34,407
[GASPS]
816
00:40:39,481 --> 00:40:41,006
[GROANS] I have not been punched
817
00:40:41,016 --> 00:40:42,340
that hard since Burning Man.
818
00:40:42,350 --> 00:40:45,351
Where is he? Where did he go?
819
00:40:46,855 --> 00:40:48,621
Why does it smell like barbeque?
820
00:40:52,151 --> 00:40:55,011
Benedict is dead,
and best-case-scenario,
821
00:40:55,030 --> 00:40:56,549
the dragon shits the key
into the bottom of the ocean.
822
00:40:56,560 --> 00:40:58,623
- Um, Quentin.
- Don't talk to me.
823
00:40:58,633 --> 00:41:00,658
- Please, I mean it.
- Okay.
824
00:41:00,668 --> 00:41:02,425
Just... [CLEARS THROAT] Just one thing
825
00:41:02,436 --> 00:41:04,329
and I swear I will never
talk to you again.
826
00:41:04,339 --> 00:41:05,463
What?
827
00:41:05,473 --> 00:41:07,532
Dragons don't shit.
828
00:41:07,542 --> 00:41:09,501
Okay, great, fun fact. Thanks.
829
00:41:09,511 --> 00:41:11,236
No one knows exactly how it works,
830
00:41:11,246 --> 00:41:13,905
but what they ingest goes elsewhere.
831
00:41:13,915 --> 00:41:15,540
They're gatekeepers, you know?
832
00:41:15,550 --> 00:41:17,308
They don't just make portals.
833
00:41:17,318 --> 00:41:19,310
They are portals.
834
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:22,714
So, actual best-case-scenario...
835
00:41:22,724 --> 00:41:25,483
The key went to the Underworld.
836
00:41:25,493 --> 00:41:27,994
- Mm.
- Oh, my God.
837
00:41:35,003 --> 00:41:36,561
If you're here, I'm practicing
838
00:41:36,571 --> 00:41:38,963
an Osseus Confervium. Bone-knitting.
839
00:41:38,973 --> 00:41:40,765
First step to building a new body.
840
00:41:40,775 --> 00:41:45,537
I know you can't see me, but I'm here.
841
00:41:45,547 --> 00:41:47,113
Thanks for giving a shit about me.
842
00:41:52,420 --> 00:41:53,812
Alice?
843
00:41:53,822 --> 00:41:55,180
[SHAKY BREATHING]
844
00:41:55,190 --> 00:41:57,348
Alice, you okay? Alice?
845
00:41:57,358 --> 00:42:00,251
God, Alice. Alice!
846
00:42:00,261 --> 00:42:03,455
God, this is... where's...
847
00:42:03,465 --> 00:42:05,223
Alice!
848
00:42:05,233 --> 00:42:07,333
[PANTING]
849
00:42:08,470 --> 00:42:12,564
Okay, okay, God. Come on.
850
00:42:12,574 --> 00:42:15,975
Come on, someone's got
to hear this, please.
851
00:42:20,882 --> 00:42:23,374
♪ Oh, as long as I know how to love? ♪
852
00:42:23,384 --> 00:42:25,076
♪ I know I'll stay alive ♪
853
00:42:25,086 --> 00:42:27,045
♪ I've got all my life to live? ♪
854
00:42:27,055 --> 00:42:29,180
♪ I've got all my love to give ♪
855
00:42:29,190 --> 00:42:30,742
♪ And I'll survive ♪
856
00:42:30,753 --> 00:42:33,492
- Synced and corrected by Shazi89 -
- www.addic7ed.com -60576
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