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1
00:01:19,230 --> 00:01:21,232
Here he comes.
2
00:01:21,265 --> 00:01:23,334
It's about time.
3
00:01:29,606 --> 00:01:33,977
Gentlemen,
I'm sorry I'm late.
4
00:01:34,010 --> 00:01:35,912
Welcome.
It's an honor to have...
5
00:01:35,946 --> 00:01:39,716
such distinguished visitors
as yourselves on my island.
6
00:01:39,750 --> 00:01:42,453
I hope the trip
was satisfactory.
7
00:01:42,486 --> 00:01:46,757
Forget that.
I hope that you have
considered our offer.
8
00:01:46,790 --> 00:01:50,227
Yes, and I do have
some concerns...
9
00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:54,631
but they are minor.
10
00:01:56,467 --> 00:01:59,770
We now expect
your full cooperation,
Governor.
11
00:01:59,803 --> 00:02:02,306
Secrecy is
of the utmost importance.
You understand?
12
00:02:02,339 --> 00:02:03,840
Of course, of course.
13
00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:07,378
There is no chance
anyone will ever know.
14
00:02:14,751 --> 00:02:17,220
What the hell is that?
15
00:02:56,360 --> 00:02:57,861
Gentlemen.
16
00:02:57,894 --> 00:03:01,498
This is Major Vladakov.
He will be in charge.
17
00:03:01,532 --> 00:03:05,035
I am sure you are aware
of his reputation.
18
00:03:05,068 --> 00:03:08,939
He is perhaps
the second-greatest
terrorist in the world.
19
00:03:10,507 --> 00:03:13,310
What
20
00:03:13,344 --> 00:03:15,979
It's impossible
to get number one.
He's never available.
21
00:03:16,012 --> 00:03:18,482
How fortunate for me.
22
00:03:19,616 --> 00:03:22,052
Now, to our mission:
23
00:03:22,085 --> 00:03:24,988
Restoring
the old world order...
24
00:03:25,021 --> 00:03:28,725
so that once again,
you may all drive
Cadillacs,
25
00:03:28,759 --> 00:03:32,596
and I can become
the number-one terrorist
in the world.
26
00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:37,468
So, let's take a tour
of your island,
27
00:03:37,501 --> 00:03:39,536
shall we?
28
00:03:42,406 --> 00:03:44,741
This guy
is a big mistake.
29
00:03:44,775 --> 00:03:46,410
I don't think so.
30
00:03:46,910 --> 00:03:48,645
We'll see.
31
00:04:01,625 --> 00:04:04,561
*
32
00:04:13,103 --> 00:04:16,039
* Oh, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
33
00:04:16,072 --> 00:04:19,042
* Yeah, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
34
00:04:19,075 --> 00:04:21,412
* Yeah, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother *
35
00:04:21,445 --> 00:04:24,681
* Come on in
36
00:04:24,715 --> 00:04:27,884
* Well, keep talkin' and
she starts losin' the blues *
37
00:04:27,918 --> 00:04:30,554
* This old house
ain't got nothin' to lose *
38
00:04:30,587 --> 00:04:35,659
* I've seen it all for years
Start spreadin' the news *
39
00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:37,594
* We got room on the floor
40
00:04:37,628 --> 00:04:41,732
* Come on, baby
Shake somethin' loose *
41
00:04:41,765 --> 00:04:44,067
* Well, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
42
00:04:44,100 --> 00:04:46,637
* Yeah, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
43
00:04:46,670 --> 00:04:48,739
* The house is a-rockin'
44
00:04:48,772 --> 00:04:51,007
* Don't bother
Come on in *
45
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:53,109
* Oh
46
00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:57,914
* Yeah
47
00:05:03,687 --> 00:05:07,090
* Well, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
48
00:05:07,123 --> 00:05:09,693
* Yeah, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
49
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:12,529
* The house is a-rockin'
Don't bother *
50
00:05:12,563 --> 00:05:15,466
* Come on in
51
00:05:15,499 --> 00:05:18,502
* Well, walkin' up the street
you can hear the sound *
52
00:05:18,535 --> 00:05:21,004
* Some band honky-tonk a few
Layin' it down *
53
00:05:21,037 --> 00:05:23,474
* They've seen it all
for years *
54
00:05:23,507 --> 00:05:26,543
* Ain't got a-nothin'
to lose *
55
00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:28,745
* So get out on the floor
56
00:05:28,779 --> 00:05:31,482
* Yeah, baby
Shake somethin' loose *
57
00:05:31,515 --> 00:05:35,686
* Oh, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
58
00:05:35,719 --> 00:05:38,489
* Yeah, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother knockin' *
59
00:05:38,522 --> 00:05:40,624
* Yeah, the house is a-rockin'
Don't bother *
60
00:05:40,657 --> 00:05:43,594
* Come on in
61
00:05:44,094 --> 00:05:48,665
* Yow
62
00:05:55,005 --> 00:05:59,209
[ Men Talking,
Shouting ]
63
00:05:59,242 --> 00:06:01,945
Hey, good shot.
Left, right, left.
64
00:06:01,978 --> 00:06:05,482
To the left, to the left,
to the left, right, left.
65
00:06:05,516 --> 00:06:08,619
To the left, to the left,
to the left, right, left.
66
00:06:08,652 --> 00:06:11,922
To the left, to the left,
to the left, right, left.
67
00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:14,958
To the left, to the left,
to the left, right, left.
68
00:06:14,991 --> 00:06:18,028
To the left, to the left,
to the left, right, left.
69
00:06:18,061 --> 00:06:20,797
Company, halt!
70
00:06:20,831 --> 00:06:24,935
Request permission
to commence
flag-raising ceremony, sir.
71
00:06:27,738 --> 00:06:30,941
Permission granted,
Ensign Parker.
72
00:06:32,843 --> 00:06:35,579
* [ Humming "The
Star
73
00:06:38,081 --> 00:06:40,984
*
74
00:06:45,956 --> 00:06:48,592
*
75
00:06:54,565 --> 00:06:56,567
Uh-oh.
76
00:07:07,944 --> 00:07:10,647
Holy mother of liberty!
That's a federal offense.
77
00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:14,785
Plus it's big. You need
78
00:07:14,818 --> 00:07:16,920
This base is
for naval personnel only.
79
00:07:16,953 --> 00:07:20,090
You are gonna get--
Hey, cool whistle.
80
00:07:20,123 --> 00:07:23,226
You know, McHale,
you cannot bribe your way
onto a naval base.
81
00:07:23,259 --> 00:07:25,929
Keep it.
I'll see you later.
82
00:07:31,101 --> 00:07:34,204
*
83
00:07:39,976 --> 00:07:41,778
Come on, Willie.
Quit stallin'.
84
00:07:41,812 --> 00:07:43,847
It's your turn.
Oh, lighten up,
Gruber.
85
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:45,248
You can't rush
this stuff.
86
00:07:45,281 --> 00:07:47,050
You don't complain
when you're drinkin' it.
87
00:07:47,083 --> 00:07:49,319
"If it hadn't actually
happened to me,
88
00:07:49,352 --> 00:07:52,088
"I never would have
thought it possible.
89
00:07:52,122 --> 00:07:56,059
"It all started one night
in a small diner
outside of town.
90
00:07:56,092 --> 00:07:58,695
"I couldn't help
but notice
how the waitress...
91
00:07:58,729 --> 00:08:02,198
"kept giving me
the sexy eye.
Oh.
92
00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:04,601
Then her twin sister
walked in."
Uh-uh.
93
00:08:05,201 --> 00:08:06,970
With their mother.
94
00:08:07,003 --> 00:08:09,172
This stuff
never really happens.
95
00:08:09,205 --> 00:08:12,175
Yeah, well, I can
personally guarantee
that this one did.
96
00:08:12,208 --> 00:08:14,945
Oh, you wrote
this one.
97
00:08:16,079 --> 00:08:18,815
No way.
98
00:08:18,849 --> 00:08:20,917
Big way.
99
00:08:20,951 --> 00:08:23,186
So there I was,
100
00:08:23,219 --> 00:08:26,089
one man gazing
into six blinking eyes...
101
00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:29,626
and three pairs
of pouty lips.
102
00:08:30,827 --> 00:08:32,328
I was so hot,
my hoagie fell...
103
00:08:32,362 --> 00:08:34,831
into a plate
of their special sauce.
104
00:08:34,865 --> 00:08:36,867
No way.
105
00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,268
Big way.
106
00:08:38,301 --> 00:08:40,671
The question is,
107
00:08:40,704 --> 00:08:44,407
do I tip ten
or twenty percent?
108
00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:47,644
Better make it 30
and leave a little somethin'
for Grandma. Hey, boys.
109
00:08:50,146 --> 00:08:52,315
All right, good news.
Company's got
a new division:
110
00:08:52,348 --> 00:08:53,950
McHale's Ice Cream.
111
00:08:53,984 --> 00:08:56,953
Comes in 31 gourmet flavors,
including Pineapple,
112
00:08:56,987 --> 00:08:59,055
Orange Tint,
13 kinds of Chocolate Mint--
113
00:08:59,089 --> 00:09:00,824
"Mango Tango Bango Berry."
114
00:09:00,857 --> 00:09:02,058
"Banana Boat Chunky Cherry."
115
00:09:02,092 --> 00:09:03,794
"Funky Lumpy Monkey Berry"?
116
00:09:03,827 --> 00:09:05,061
"Loosey-Goosey Scary Berry."
117
00:09:05,095 --> 00:09:07,263
And just plain Berry.
118
00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:09,065
Any of these low fat?
119
00:09:09,099 --> 00:09:10,801
They're all low fat,
if you spit out
the chunks.
120
00:09:10,834 --> 00:09:14,070
Hey, that's an idea.
I've got 1,000 gallons.
121
00:09:14,104 --> 00:09:17,140
That's 4,000 pints.
Our cost is a dollar
a unit.
122
00:09:17,173 --> 00:09:19,209
So what do we charge?
123
00:09:19,242 --> 00:09:21,344
We can probably get
five, six bucks apiece.
Five, six bucks.
124
00:09:21,377 --> 00:09:23,346
- Better make it six.
- Six bucks.
125
00:09:23,379 --> 00:09:28,051
Wait a second.
A thousand gallons,
that is 8,000 pints.
126
00:09:28,084 --> 00:09:31,321
Oh, yeah, that's right.
Yeah. Thank you.
127
00:09:31,354 --> 00:09:34,190
Anybody want to place
any last-minute bets
on the big game?
128
00:09:34,224 --> 00:09:36,192
I'm in for 20.
I'm in for 25.
129
00:09:36,226 --> 00:09:39,930
Here's 20.
Give him 20.
25. Give him 25.
130
00:09:39,963 --> 00:09:43,834
Pot's right.
This stuff is for sellin',
not snackin'.
131
00:09:43,867 --> 00:09:46,336
We better get seven,
our cost being
two bucks a unit.
132
00:09:46,369 --> 00:09:49,372
I thought it was a buck.
That's before I knew
we had twice as much.
133
00:09:50,273 --> 00:09:52,809
Come on!
134
00:09:52,843 --> 00:09:54,711
See you guys later.
135
00:09:57,848 --> 00:09:59,449
Mm. That's yummy.
136
00:10:05,889 --> 00:10:08,124
Where you been, McHale?
Y-You gonna take care
of me?
137
00:10:08,158 --> 00:10:10,060
Don't I always?
Chill! Come on.
138
00:10:10,093 --> 00:10:11,962
Did you get me
the good stuff?
139
00:10:11,995 --> 00:10:13,764
You got somethin'
for me?
Yeah.
140
00:10:20,403 --> 00:10:22,472
"Orange, Strawberry,
Banana."
Light.
141
00:10:22,505 --> 00:10:24,841
Thanks, McHale.
You're a prince.
142
00:10:24,875 --> 00:10:27,077
One more thing.
You got a freezer?
Yeah. Why?
143
00:10:27,110 --> 00:10:28,478
I need you to unload
some ice cream
for me.
144
00:10:28,511 --> 00:10:31,815
Anything for you, McHale.
Good, 'cause I got
some chili coming in.
145
00:10:31,848 --> 00:10:33,716
Okay.
146
00:10:38,388 --> 00:10:40,757
Oh! Hoo!
147
00:10:40,791 --> 00:10:43,293
[ Beeping,
Whirring ]
148
00:10:44,427 --> 00:10:46,029
Hey, buddy.
Hey, buddy!
149
00:10:46,062 --> 00:10:47,497
Got those pictures
I need, buddy?
150
00:10:47,530 --> 00:10:49,332
Got those pictures
I need, buddy?
151
00:10:49,933 --> 00:10:52,135
Yes!
152
00:10:55,505 --> 00:10:59,509
Thanks, buddy.
Oh, thank you, buddy.
153
00:11:00,243 --> 00:11:02,312
Wow.
154
00:11:09,585 --> 00:11:12,122
Hola McHale.
Hey, thanks, Miguel.
155
00:11:12,155 --> 00:11:13,824
* Meet me by the campsite
156
00:11:13,857 --> 00:11:15,826
* In the caravan
157
00:11:15,859 --> 00:11:18,161
* On the Riviera
158
00:11:21,064 --> 00:11:24,500
* But she don't care
about that *
159
00:11:24,534 --> 00:11:26,369
* She say
160
00:11:26,402 --> 00:11:29,205
* I'm workin'
all my time *
161
00:11:32,275 --> 00:11:34,945
McHale, ole.
How ya doin'?
Hi.
162
00:11:34,978 --> 00:11:37,247
* Oh, mon
163
00:11:37,881 --> 00:11:40,216
Hi, kids.
164
00:11:40,250 --> 00:11:42,485
Hey, Doc.
McHale.
165
00:11:42,518 --> 00:11:44,420
Thanks. Oh!
166
00:11:46,189 --> 00:11:48,091
We really needed this.
167
00:11:48,124 --> 00:11:49,826
How can we ever
make it up to you?
168
00:11:49,860 --> 00:11:51,862
Forget about it.
I'm happy to help out
any way I can.
169
00:11:52,428 --> 00:11:54,998
Well--
170
00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:59,135
If you want another kidney,
the answer is no...
171
00:11:59,169 --> 00:12:02,538
unless you got
a new set of golf clubs.
172
00:12:12,148 --> 00:12:14,350
All right, men, listen up.
Today's the big day.
173
00:12:14,384 --> 00:12:16,152
The satellite photos are in,
and they're clear.
174
00:12:16,186 --> 00:12:17,487
Now, as you can see
175
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:20,991
right here their cleanup
hitter crowds the plate?
176
00:12:21,024 --> 00:12:24,227
What's that mean, Juan?
Hit him in the head
with a fastball.
177
00:12:24,260 --> 00:12:28,164
No, unfortunately
he's wearing a helmet.
Then we pitch him inside.
178
00:12:28,198 --> 00:12:33,103
Right, and that means?
He will pull it, so
I play closer to the line.
179
00:12:33,136 --> 00:12:35,371
Plus you can trip him
when he's going around
second base.
180
00:12:35,405 --> 00:12:36,973
You guys
got a great coach.
181
00:12:37,007 --> 00:12:39,375
All right, Roberto's
the cutoff man.
182
00:12:39,409 --> 00:12:42,178
And he's not here.
Where is he?
183
00:12:42,212 --> 00:12:45,015
Sorry, McHale.
I tried to keep
an eye on him for you...
184
00:12:45,048 --> 00:12:47,984
but he's always
running off.
185
00:12:48,018 --> 00:12:49,886
Okay. All right.
186
00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:51,454
This is their
third base coach
giving the steal sign.
187
00:12:53,223 --> 00:12:55,058
Picking his nose
is the steal sign?
188
00:12:55,091 --> 00:12:57,360
I told you
they were crafty.
189
00:12:57,393 --> 00:12:58,661
Who's the best team
in the Caribbean?
190
00:12:58,694 --> 00:13:00,230
San Moreno!
191
00:13:00,263 --> 00:13:02,032
And who's gonna crush
San Felipe?
192
00:13:02,065 --> 00:13:03,233
San Moreno!
193
00:13:03,266 --> 00:13:06,369
Who's gonna run
20 wind sprints to warm up
for the game?
194
00:13:06,402 --> 00:13:08,138
San Moreno!
195
00:13:08,171 --> 00:13:10,173
All right, guys,
come on.
196
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:12,442
Let's go!
Come on, fellas.
197
00:13:12,475 --> 00:13:14,177
Wait a minute,
wait a minute,
wait a minute.
198
00:13:15,145 --> 00:13:16,679
You guys look terrible.
199
00:13:16,712 --> 00:13:18,081
Look at those jerseys.
You're never going
to get on
200
00:13:18,114 --> 00:13:21,017
This Week in Caribbean
Basebal looking like that.
201
00:13:21,051 --> 00:13:24,387
I guess you better
What is it?ar these.
202
00:13:24,420 --> 00:13:27,657
Wow! New jerseys!
Cool!
203
00:13:27,690 --> 00:13:30,426
If you win today,
next week you get pants.
204
00:13:31,461 --> 00:13:33,129
Wow, thanks!
Yeah, thanks!
205
00:13:33,163 --> 00:13:35,265
What are you
laughing at?
206
00:13:35,298 --> 00:13:37,367
You know my Harley's
runnin' a little rich.
207
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,269
That's because
you fiddle with it
all the time.
208
00:13:39,302 --> 00:13:42,238
I don't fiddle
with it.
209
00:13:42,272 --> 00:13:45,541
All right, I'll fix it.
At least I know
what I'm doing.
210
00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:47,110
If you knew what you
were doing,
I wouldn't have to fiddle
211
00:13:47,143 --> 00:13:49,212
with it all the time.
212
00:13:51,347 --> 00:13:53,116
You're late.
213
00:13:53,149 --> 00:13:55,051
McHale, I gotta
talk to you.
214
00:13:55,085 --> 00:13:56,586
Hey, Roberto,
where you been?
215
00:13:56,619 --> 00:13:59,522
Last night by the pier
I saw the governor...
216
00:13:59,555 --> 00:14:03,126
meeting some strange-looking
dudes in uniforms,
so I took some pictures.
217
00:14:03,159 --> 00:14:06,529
I've told you a million times,
knock off the spy stuff.
218
00:14:06,562 --> 00:14:10,500
You've got the best glove of
any outfielder I've ever seen.
Life is good.
219
00:14:15,171 --> 00:14:17,040
Give me the film.
220
00:14:20,543 --> 00:14:23,579
I'm just trying
to look out for you,
all right?
221
00:14:23,613 --> 00:14:26,116
Come on,
let's play some ball.
222
00:14:26,149 --> 00:14:28,218
I got you a new jersey.
223
00:14:30,453 --> 00:14:32,122
All right, guys!
Let's get ready now!
224
00:14:32,155 --> 00:14:35,058
Come on,
let's play some ball!
225
00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:44,500
Good morning, sir.
Good morning.
226
00:14:49,072 --> 00:14:54,577
Sir, the launch will be ready
to take us to the base
in 15 minutes.
227
00:14:54,610 --> 00:14:59,082
I have all this knowledge,
and they send me to this dump
in the middle of nowhere.
228
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:01,117
Twenty years
of naval experience,
229
00:15:01,151 --> 00:15:03,553
and I always
get passed over
for the good assignments.
230
00:15:03,586 --> 00:15:07,690
No one can convince me that
it isn't because of that
damn cruise ship incident.
231
00:15:10,626 --> 00:15:14,730
Sir, may I respectfully
offer an opinion?
232
00:15:14,764 --> 00:15:16,699
You may.
233
00:15:16,732 --> 00:15:19,069
I studied the Caribbean
at the academy, sir,
234
00:15:19,102 --> 00:15:21,471
and, if you don't mind
me saying so,
235
00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:23,806
this area
is very critical.
236
00:15:23,839 --> 00:15:26,576
Perhaps they sent you here
because you possess
the ability...
237
00:15:26,609 --> 00:15:29,145
to turn this
into a top-notch
naval facility.
238
00:15:29,179 --> 00:15:31,214
Huh! You think so?
239
00:15:31,247 --> 00:15:33,816
Yes, sir.
This may be
just the place...
240
00:15:33,849 --> 00:15:36,686
where your attention
to discipline
is appreciated.
241
00:15:36,719 --> 00:15:39,222
I could use
a new challenge.
242
00:15:39,255 --> 00:15:43,493
Maybe this time there'll
be some raw material
I can work with.
243
00:15:55,605 --> 00:15:57,273
They're coming!
244
00:15:57,307 --> 00:16:01,077
Oh!
Marlin on.
Marlin on!
245
00:16:06,316 --> 00:16:08,384
They're here!
Oh! Ow.
246
00:16:14,357 --> 00:16:16,692
They're coming,
the boat!
247
00:16:16,726 --> 00:16:19,162
Hey, guys!
Hey, guys!
248
00:16:19,195 --> 00:16:21,497
[ Pinball Machine
Beeping ]
249
00:16:21,531 --> 00:16:24,567
Hey, ice cream!
How much?
250
00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:25,601
Ten bucks a pint.
251
00:16:25,635 --> 00:16:28,138
Put me down for chocolate
and anything else...
252
00:16:28,171 --> 00:16:31,541
that's got a nutty thing
going on, but no raisins.
253
00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:33,809
The new C.O.
is on his way here now!
254
00:16:33,843 --> 00:16:35,545
He's not due
till next week.
255
00:16:35,578 --> 00:16:38,148
Yeah, well,
he's here.
Hey, you guys.
256
00:16:38,181 --> 00:16:40,516
We got a little boat
comin' in.
257
00:16:44,654 --> 00:16:46,289
Well, there goes
tonight's luau.
258
00:16:46,322 --> 00:16:47,857
Oh, man, we gotta hide
our stuff.
259
00:16:47,890 --> 00:16:50,092
And put on your uniforms
and fall in.
260
00:16:52,395 --> 00:16:53,696
We were supposed
to keep those things?
261
00:16:53,729 --> 00:16:56,098
Come on, knucklehead.
I'll buy you
another one.
262
00:16:57,367 --> 00:16:59,569
Come on, Chuck.
You can do it.
263
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:04,174
All you need is just
a little confidence.
Think "promotion."
264
00:17:04,207 --> 00:17:06,409
I think I can.
I think I can.
I think I can.
265
00:17:06,442 --> 00:17:08,278
Greetings,
Captain Binghampton.
266
00:17:08,311 --> 00:17:11,147
At your service,
Captain.
267
00:17:11,181 --> 00:17:14,450
It's an honor,
Captain Binghampton, sir!
268
00:17:14,484 --> 00:17:16,519
I better
tone that down.
269
00:17:40,243 --> 00:17:43,513
Uh--
270
00:17:43,546 --> 00:17:45,448
Thank you
for that greeting, Ensign.
271
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:47,917
Um, Charles T. Parker,
sir.
272
00:17:47,950 --> 00:17:50,953
Welcome to San Sid.
What?
273
00:17:50,986 --> 00:17:53,223
Oh, that's the base's
nickname, sir.
274
00:17:53,256 --> 00:17:54,957
See, this is
San Ysidro island,
275
00:17:54,990 --> 00:17:57,227
the main island
in the San Ysidro chain,
276
00:17:57,260 --> 00:18:00,630
located right between
Cuba and-- pftt--
the Virgin Islands.
277
00:18:00,663 --> 00:18:04,567
But the locals just shortened
the "Ysidro" to "Sid."
See? San Sid, sir.
278
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:07,370
You're a moron,
aren't you?
279
00:18:11,541 --> 00:18:14,977
What's this?
280
00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:18,748
This is a tarp,
short for "tarpaulin,"
which is generally--
281
00:18:18,781 --> 00:18:21,317
Not this!
This!
282
00:18:21,351 --> 00:18:23,853
Oh. Oh!
283
00:18:23,886 --> 00:18:26,322
Well, this is
a frosty concoction...
284
00:18:26,356 --> 00:18:29,492
home brewed
by one of our colorful,
yet loveable locals.
285
00:18:37,733 --> 00:18:40,703
This is a military
installation,
not a brewery.
286
00:18:40,736 --> 00:18:44,440
I've heard about this place.
It's a lot less of
a naval base...
287
00:18:44,474 --> 00:18:48,611
and a lot more of sandbaggers
trying to get free food
and lodging out of Uncle Sam!
288
00:18:48,644 --> 00:18:50,680
Now, that is not
entirely true, sir.
289
00:19:03,025 --> 00:19:04,760
Fall in.
290
00:19:06,662 --> 00:19:10,366
Whoa!
Check it out.
Hey.
291
00:19:12,535 --> 00:19:15,237
Excuse me, sir.
Oh, look out.
292
00:19:17,006 --> 00:19:18,608
Okay, let's hear it.
293
00:19:19,008 --> 00:19:20,743
Come on.
294
00:19:20,776 --> 00:19:24,480
I have heard them all.
Well, what is it?
295
00:19:24,514 --> 00:19:26,582
I'd like to polish
her turrets?
296
00:19:26,616 --> 00:19:28,851
I'd like her
to inflate my raft?
297
00:19:28,884 --> 00:19:32,622
I'd like to swab
her deck?
298
00:19:33,756 --> 00:19:35,525
Well?
Um--
299
00:19:37,026 --> 00:19:40,830
Uh, the swabbin'
the deck one.
300
00:19:43,098 --> 00:19:44,767
Really?
Mm-hmm.
301
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:47,903
Well, I am
a superior officer,
302
00:19:47,937 --> 00:19:49,739
and one more joke
like that,
303
00:19:49,772 --> 00:19:53,743
and I am recommending
that you are all
transferred...
304
00:19:53,776 --> 00:19:56,846
to our base
deep in Alaska's
Aleutian Islands.
305
00:19:56,879 --> 00:19:58,881
This place
is so isolated...
306
00:19:58,914 --> 00:20:02,352
you will spend your days
spit-shining urinals...
307
00:20:02,385 --> 00:20:07,323
and drunkenly trawling for
innocent civilians to beat up.
308
00:20:07,357 --> 00:20:09,792
Uh, ma'am?
309
00:20:09,825 --> 00:20:11,527
Would this be
a permanent-duty
assignment?
310
00:20:11,561 --> 00:20:14,497
Ow! Sorry.
Sorry, sir.
Ma'am.
311
00:20:21,404 --> 00:20:23,873
Good work, Lieutenant.
Thank you, sir.
312
00:20:23,906 --> 00:20:25,908
Atten-hut!
313
00:20:27,777 --> 00:20:30,680
Hey, Happy,
ain't that the guy
who sunk the Love Boat?
314
00:20:31,681 --> 00:20:32,948
Oh, yeah.
315
00:20:32,982 --> 00:20:35,084
Did we wake you up?
316
00:20:35,117 --> 00:20:37,787
No, sir.
We've been up since
the crack of noon, sir.
317
00:20:37,820 --> 00:20:40,490
Well, that's
going to change.
318
00:20:40,523 --> 00:20:42,858
Inspection
in five minutes.
Fall out!
319
00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:47,463
What's the hurry,
boys?
320
00:20:47,497 --> 00:20:50,866
The new C.O.'s coming.
We gotta get all this stuff
cleaned up!
321
00:20:50,900 --> 00:20:54,036
Want some ice cream?
Oh!
322
00:20:54,069 --> 00:20:56,739
Would you guys relax?
You know how
these new C.O.s are.
323
00:20:56,772 --> 00:20:58,340
They're tough
for two weeks.
324
00:20:58,374 --> 00:21:01,644
Before you know it,
they're trading shore passes
for toilet paper with aloe.
325
00:21:01,677 --> 00:21:04,013
Not this guy, McHale.
He's "D" for difficult.
326
00:21:04,046 --> 00:21:07,082
The type of difficult
that makes a--
Shut up.
327
00:21:07,116 --> 00:21:10,886
You're making good time,
and you've still
got 16 seconds.
328
00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:13,088
So keep it up.
I'll talk to you later.
329
00:21:13,122 --> 00:21:15,791
Make your bed!
Make your bed!
Up here!
330
00:21:19,094 --> 00:21:20,896
Attention on deck!
331
00:21:37,580 --> 00:21:39,515
Suck it in, mister!
332
00:21:39,549 --> 00:21:42,552
I'm totally
sucked, sir.
333
00:21:46,922 --> 00:21:49,492
How about a shave,
sailor?
334
00:21:49,525 --> 00:21:51,527
Been thinkin'
about it, sir.
335
00:21:52,662 --> 00:21:54,664
Working
without tools, eh?
336
00:21:56,198 --> 00:21:58,701
What happened
to your sleeves?
337
00:21:58,734 --> 00:22:02,004
Uh, lost 'em
in a poker game, sir.
338
00:22:02,037 --> 00:22:03,906
Angry loser.
339
00:22:12,648 --> 00:22:15,050
Where is
your bunk, son?
340
00:22:16,051 --> 00:22:18,688
It's outside, sir.
341
00:22:18,721 --> 00:22:20,756
Outside?
Yeah.
342
00:22:20,790 --> 00:22:24,794
It's, uh, out there
on up in a tree, sir.
343
00:22:28,964 --> 00:22:30,833
You have a gravity
problem, son?
344
00:22:30,866 --> 00:22:33,168
Uh, no, sir.
345
00:22:33,202 --> 00:22:35,905
You just enjoy sleeping
up in the trees?
346
00:22:35,938 --> 00:22:39,509
Oh, I sure do, sir.
347
00:22:39,542 --> 00:22:41,043
Carpenter,
take a note.
348
00:22:41,076 --> 00:22:43,012
From now on,
anything found...
349
00:22:43,045 --> 00:22:45,481
sleeping up in a tree
after lights out...
350
00:22:45,515 --> 00:22:47,650
will be shot,
understood?
351
00:22:49,552 --> 00:22:51,721
Noted, sir.
352
00:22:54,189 --> 00:22:57,693
What are you trying
to hide from me,
Ensign?
353
00:22:57,727 --> 00:22:59,795
Why, nothing, sir.
354
00:22:59,829 --> 00:23:02,231
Why, nothing, sir.
355
00:23:06,235 --> 00:23:08,470
Move.
356
00:23:12,708 --> 00:23:15,578
It appears to be
more contraband, sir.
357
00:23:16,546 --> 00:23:19,549
"McHale's Mai Tai."
358
00:23:19,582 --> 00:23:23,085
"McHale's Ale."
359
00:23:23,118 --> 00:23:28,023
"McHale's Girls
of the San Ysidro
Islands Calendar."
360
00:23:28,057 --> 00:23:30,292
Would someone tell me
what this is?
361
00:23:30,325 --> 00:23:32,161
Well, these are
scantily clad...
362
00:23:32,194 --> 00:23:34,664
yet tasteful
photos of women
the men use as--
363
00:23:34,697 --> 00:23:38,200
Shut up!
364
00:23:46,075 --> 00:23:47,610
What were you eating,
sailor?
365
00:23:48,811 --> 00:23:52,682
[ Swallows,
Moans ]
366
00:23:57,352 --> 00:23:59,555
"McHale's Ice Cream."
No.
367
00:24:00,890 --> 00:24:02,825
Well, well, well,
well, well.
368
00:24:02,858 --> 00:24:06,161
You men have done something
that I've never seen before.
369
00:24:06,195 --> 00:24:09,331
You've managed
to transform an official
military installation...
370
00:24:09,364 --> 00:24:12,101
into aisle three
at the Price Club!
371
00:24:12,134 --> 00:24:14,236
What a resourceful group.
372
00:24:14,269 --> 00:24:16,305
Thank you, sir,
but we really can't
take all the credit.
373
00:24:16,338 --> 00:24:17,973
We owe it to our
good buddy, McHale.
374
00:24:18,007 --> 00:24:20,676
Hmm! Shh!
375
00:24:33,122 --> 00:24:36,325
Welcome to the navy,
gentlemen.
376
00:24:36,358 --> 00:24:41,664
All right, driver,
take this garbage
to the dump!
377
00:24:41,697 --> 00:24:43,666
And make sure everything
is in official accordance...
378
00:24:43,699 --> 00:24:46,201
with the rules
of navy dumping!
379
00:24:46,235 --> 00:24:49,204
[ Horn Honks,
Engine Starts ]
380
00:24:57,079 --> 00:24:59,148
Okay.
381
00:25:04,286 --> 00:25:06,355
You know, this part
of the island,
382
00:25:06,388 --> 00:25:08,323
I don't think
you want to go here.
383
00:25:08,357 --> 00:25:12,094
It's all so muddy,
and the villagers
are interrupting.
384
00:25:12,127 --> 00:25:14,196
This isn't
the best place to do--
385
00:25:14,229 --> 00:25:16,932
to do whatever
heinous things
you're planning to do.
386
00:25:19,401 --> 00:25:21,937
Major, this spot
is primo.
387
00:25:21,971 --> 00:25:23,873
The vectors are perfect.
388
00:25:23,906 --> 00:25:25,975
Their range
is maximum.
389
00:25:29,378 --> 00:25:31,647
This is where
we shall set up.
390
00:25:37,853 --> 00:25:39,655
You, boy.
391
00:25:39,689 --> 00:25:41,223
Where did you get
that shirt?
392
00:25:41,256 --> 00:25:44,026
Oh, uh, that's
their coach, McHale.
393
00:25:45,227 --> 00:25:46,762
H-H-He's a nobody.
394
00:25:46,796 --> 00:25:50,666
He's an old retired
American sailor
that comes around...
395
00:25:50,700 --> 00:25:52,935
and coaches the team.
396
00:25:52,968 --> 00:25:56,739
He lives on an island,
all by himself.
397
00:25:56,772 --> 00:25:59,842
Run along
to McHale, boys.
398
00:26:04,747 --> 00:26:07,349
I hope you will
not be so loose-lipped...
399
00:26:07,382 --> 00:26:09,685
if someone should ask
about me.
400
00:26:09,719 --> 00:26:11,687
B-But I wouldn't
say anything.
401
00:26:11,721 --> 00:26:14,189
Besides, I don't know
anything about you,
402
00:26:14,223 --> 00:26:16,425
except that you're
the second-best
terrorist in the world.
403
00:26:21,430 --> 00:26:24,199
Major, our equipment
has arrived.
404
00:26:24,233 --> 00:26:26,401
Take me to it.
405
00:26:30,773 --> 00:26:33,242
Move it! Move it!
Move it!
406
00:26:35,377 --> 00:26:36,812
Come on, faster!
Faster!
407
00:26:36,846 --> 00:26:39,849
Did you hear what
he called me, David?
408
00:26:39,882 --> 00:26:41,216
Huh
409
00:26:41,250 --> 00:26:43,352
You heard that,
right?
410
00:26:43,385 --> 00:26:46,355
Don't go there.
You always do this.
411
00:26:46,388 --> 00:26:48,223
He meant it
as a compliment.
412
00:26:48,257 --> 00:26:50,425
You always have
to turn it into
something about you.
413
00:26:50,459 --> 00:26:52,862
Why do you always
minimize my pain?
414
00:26:52,895 --> 00:26:56,498
I thought we were
getting somewhere,
and as your psychiatrist,
415
00:26:56,531 --> 00:26:59,134
I now realize
we have a lot of work
to do on this.
416
00:26:59,168 --> 00:27:02,104
But I am here
to help you,
417
00:27:02,137 --> 00:27:04,807
even if you are holding
my entire family hostage
in Bangladesh.
418
00:27:04,840 --> 00:27:07,242
Major Vladakov,
I see a lot of equipment...
419
00:27:07,276 --> 00:27:09,211
for such a quiet
operation.
420
00:27:09,244 --> 00:27:12,147
Why don't you just say
that if I were any better...
421
00:27:12,181 --> 00:27:14,149
I would need
less equipment?
422
00:27:14,183 --> 00:27:16,018
Easy.
423
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:20,389
Thank you, Governor.
You are dismissed.
424
00:27:25,027 --> 00:27:26,862
Oh, and Governor?
425
00:27:26,896 --> 00:27:30,833
May I suggest
that you use
some of that graft...
426
00:27:30,866 --> 00:27:34,770
to invest in a solid
antiperspirant?
427
00:27:42,845 --> 00:27:45,314
*
428
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:53,355
* You people
429
00:27:53,388 --> 00:27:56,158
* Got a heart
of steel, yeah *
430
00:27:56,191 --> 00:27:58,393
* Do the funky boogie now
431
00:27:58,427 --> 00:28:00,495
* Come on
and show me *
432
00:28:02,397 --> 00:28:04,266
* Feel good music
in your soul *
433
00:28:04,299 --> 00:28:06,435
Hey, Petey.
434
00:28:06,468 --> 00:28:09,304
Huh?
435
00:28:09,338 --> 00:28:12,241
Come on.
What a pig.
436
00:28:12,274 --> 00:28:15,044
* Hey, hey, hey
437
00:28:15,077 --> 00:28:18,080
* Hey, mama, hey
Want to go
for a ride?
438
00:28:18,113 --> 00:28:22,351
* Old McHale had a farm
E-I-E-I-O *
439
00:28:22,384 --> 00:28:24,119
Come on,
sing with me.
440
00:28:24,153 --> 00:28:27,156
* And on his farm
he had a pig *
441
00:28:27,189 --> 00:28:29,524
* I'm not groovin'
442
00:28:32,527 --> 00:28:36,331
* Gonna make you feel good
443
00:28:37,266 --> 00:28:39,368
* Feel good
444
00:28:39,401 --> 00:28:42,905
* Music in your soul
Uh-huh *
445
00:28:42,938 --> 00:28:45,941
* It's gonna make your body
rock 'n' roll *
446
00:28:46,475 --> 00:28:48,243
* Roll
447
00:28:48,277 --> 00:28:51,513
* Hey, hey, hey
448
00:28:55,317 --> 00:28:57,987
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
You are so lucky.
449
00:28:58,020 --> 00:29:00,489
I wish I could fit
in that box.
450
00:29:00,522 --> 00:29:01,456
Now go make me
some breakfast.
451
00:29:30,552 --> 00:29:33,455
Finally, David,
my stealth boat.
452
00:29:33,488 --> 00:29:35,324
What do you think
of her?
453
00:29:35,357 --> 00:29:38,127
Very stealthy, sir.
454
00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:41,096
Alzo,
is she ready yet?
455
00:29:41,130 --> 00:29:43,632
I feel like
a sunset cruise
this evening.
456
00:29:43,665 --> 00:29:47,236
Very soon, sir.
And, Major?
457
00:29:47,269 --> 00:29:51,506
I know your nautical
knowledge and experience
is somewhat limited,
458
00:29:51,540 --> 00:29:53,508
but just give it
a little time.
459
00:29:53,542 --> 00:29:58,347
Hey, can't be
the second-greatest terrorist
in the world forever.
460
00:30:01,016 --> 00:30:04,253
Roberto, my boy,
461
00:30:04,286 --> 00:30:06,621
you've definitely
got some talent.
462
00:30:12,694 --> 00:30:14,263
Vladakov?
463
00:30:49,698 --> 00:30:52,067
Ahoy, McHale!
464
00:30:52,101 --> 00:30:55,004
How are you enjoying
your retirement?
465
00:30:55,037 --> 00:30:58,273
Fine, fine. It's just not
as peaceful as I'd like it
to be right now.
466
00:30:58,307 --> 00:31:00,575
I haven't seen you
since Panama.
What have you been up to?
467
00:31:02,377 --> 00:31:03,712
I've been looking
all over for this.
468
00:31:03,745 --> 00:31:09,985
Oh, you know, the usual.
Madness, mayhem, death
and destruction.
469
00:31:10,019 --> 00:31:11,520
Yeah, me too.
470
00:31:11,553 --> 00:31:13,455
Listen, I'd have you up,
but it's a little messy
right now.
471
00:31:13,488 --> 00:31:15,957
Why don't you stay
right there?
472
00:31:20,062 --> 00:31:21,530
Yeah, right.
473
00:31:21,563 --> 00:31:23,665
Damn.
474
00:31:23,698 --> 00:31:28,003
Stand by for further
air conditioning.
475
00:31:32,707 --> 00:31:34,576
What a dick.
476
00:31:52,827 --> 00:31:55,364
Come on, Petey.
477
00:32:09,478 --> 00:32:11,480
Watch out!
478
00:32:13,748 --> 00:32:16,185
Whoa!
479
00:32:20,455 --> 00:32:23,125
Hold on!
480
00:32:26,395 --> 00:32:28,397
Go warn the others!
481
00:32:47,649 --> 00:32:50,051
Oh!
482
00:33:49,878 --> 00:33:52,147
Shit!
483
00:34:48,737 --> 00:34:50,772
Yes!
484
00:35:00,749 --> 00:35:03,485
Whoa!
485
00:35:28,477 --> 00:35:31,946
Well, McHale,
I guess this
makes us even.
486
00:35:55,737 --> 00:35:58,707
Order arms!
487
00:35:58,740 --> 00:36:01,476
That, in case you are
unfamiliar with it,
488
00:36:01,510 --> 00:36:03,912
was our
national anthem.
489
00:36:03,945 --> 00:36:06,715
And you slobs,
in case you are
unfamiliar with it,
490
00:36:06,748 --> 00:36:08,983
are in the
United States Navy.
491
00:36:09,017 --> 00:36:12,754
Not McHale's Navy--
the United States Navy!
492
00:36:12,787 --> 00:36:15,657
There'll be no more
sloppiness, no more fun,
493
00:36:15,690 --> 00:36:18,860
and most definitely,
no more McHale.
494
00:36:18,893 --> 00:36:20,895
McHale!
495
00:36:23,798 --> 00:36:26,801
Call 911.
Call 911.
496
00:36:26,835 --> 00:36:29,671
Hey, hey, hey.
Wha--
497
00:36:32,841 --> 00:36:34,909
What am I going
to do with you, Quint?
498
00:36:34,943 --> 00:36:37,011
Well, how about
a sponge bath for starters,
499
00:36:37,045 --> 00:36:39,314
and maybe later
a foot massage?
500
00:36:39,348 --> 00:36:42,050
Personality intact.
501
00:36:42,083 --> 00:36:43,752
You were out
for a while.
502
00:36:43,785 --> 00:36:45,787
What happened?
503
00:36:45,820 --> 00:36:49,023
Uh, some crazed
East German
blew up my boat.
504
00:36:49,057 --> 00:36:51,059
Which reminds me.
You gotta hand me
my underwear.
505
00:36:51,092 --> 00:36:53,027
I have to
go kill him now.
Mm-hmm.
506
00:36:53,061 --> 00:36:55,364
Atten-hut!
507
00:36:56,565 --> 00:36:59,601
We haven't met, McHale,
so I'll be brief.
508
00:36:59,634 --> 00:37:02,371
My name is Captain
Wallace B. Binghampton.
509
00:37:02,404 --> 00:37:05,006
That's brief?
510
00:37:05,039 --> 00:37:07,008
I'm the new
commanding officer.
511
00:37:07,041 --> 00:37:10,011
And you, mister,
are a bootlegger
and a smuggler.
512
00:37:10,044 --> 00:37:12,547
I don't believe we've met.
I'm Quinton McHale.
513
00:37:12,581 --> 00:37:14,683
Lieutenant Penelope Carpenter.
514
00:37:14,716 --> 00:37:17,752
You know, your boyfriend's
kind of rude.
515
00:37:17,786 --> 00:37:19,020
I'm not her boyfriend.
516
00:37:19,053 --> 00:37:20,455
Did you guys break up?
517
00:37:20,489 --> 00:37:21,623
She was never my girlfriend.
518
00:37:21,656 --> 00:37:23,057
Just lovers, huh?
519
00:37:23,091 --> 00:37:24,893
You listen to me, mister.
520
00:37:24,926 --> 00:37:26,595
When I'm done with you,
you're gonna wish...
521
00:37:26,628 --> 00:37:29,731
whoever you
tangled with last night
had finished you off.
522
00:37:29,764 --> 00:37:33,134
Captain, please,
this man has just been
through a major trauma.
523
00:37:33,167 --> 00:37:35,036
Plus I'm due
for a sponge bath.
524
00:37:35,069 --> 00:37:38,873
You're under arrest.
Throw this bum
in the brig!
525
00:37:38,907 --> 00:37:40,609
Lieutenant?
526
00:37:40,642 --> 00:37:41,510
What is it?
527
00:37:41,543 --> 00:37:43,878
You know, I used to be
in the navy too.
528
00:37:43,912 --> 00:37:47,482
And I'm sure
they threw a big party
after you left.
529
00:37:47,516 --> 00:37:49,484
Well, as a matter
of fact--
530
00:37:49,518 --> 00:37:50,519
You know, it seems like
she hates me,
531
00:37:50,552 --> 00:37:53,622
but I'm sure it's
all part of her master plan.
532
00:37:53,655 --> 00:37:55,657
Don't just
stand there, boys,
grab a sponge!
533
00:37:59,060 --> 00:38:01,029
I tell you guys,
something strange is going on
534
00:38:01,062 --> 00:38:02,731
on the other side
of the island.
535
00:38:02,764 --> 00:38:04,466
What's your
problem, dude?
536
00:38:04,499 --> 00:38:07,502
You always think
something's going on,
but nothing ever is.
537
00:38:07,536 --> 00:38:09,771
You're living
in a James Bond
fantasy world.
538
00:38:09,804 --> 00:38:11,873
You have
to get in touch
with reality.
539
00:38:11,906 --> 00:38:13,808
What's that noise?
540
00:38:13,842 --> 00:38:15,810
Come on,
let's go.
541
00:38:27,221 --> 00:38:28,823
Fantasy world, huh?
542
00:38:28,857 --> 00:38:31,025
This looks
pretty real to me.
543
00:38:31,059 --> 00:38:35,163
I must maintain discipline.
These men must be taught
a lesson.
544
00:38:35,196 --> 00:38:36,631
I understand that, sir,
but you're just taking it...
545
00:38:36,665 --> 00:38:38,800
a little too far,
that's all.
546
00:38:40,935 --> 00:38:44,673
Come on,
let's go.
547
00:38:46,174 --> 00:38:48,743
Well, David,
where were we?
548
00:38:48,777 --> 00:38:51,513
Of course you had
a traumatic childhood,
Uh-huh.
549
00:38:51,546 --> 00:38:53,948
but there are better ways
to deal with people
than just shooting them.
550
00:38:53,982 --> 00:38:56,951
Well, what do you
suggest, David?
Good afternoon, Major.
551
00:38:56,985 --> 00:39:00,555
Yes, yes,
what do you want,
you island wart?
552
00:39:00,589 --> 00:39:03,892
B-But, uh,
Major, please.
Major!
553
00:39:03,925 --> 00:39:06,528
The people
from the village
near here,
554
00:39:06,561 --> 00:39:08,029
they have
very little.
555
00:39:08,062 --> 00:39:09,698
They have you.
556
00:39:09,731 --> 00:39:11,900
You said no one
would even know
you were here.
557
00:39:11,933 --> 00:39:13,234
You've torn up
the roads.
558
00:39:13,267 --> 00:39:15,069
You've ruined
the baseball field.
559
00:39:15,103 --> 00:39:18,973
You've disrupted
the lives of my people.
And your point is?
560
00:39:19,007 --> 00:39:21,676
You have to take
into consideration
the people--
561
00:39:21,710 --> 00:39:24,646
m people--
as we move forward
in our relationship.
562
00:39:24,679 --> 00:39:26,915
Consider them considered.
563
00:39:26,948 --> 00:39:29,551
Governor,
you have my word.
564
00:39:29,584 --> 00:39:33,555
I knew I could
talk to you, Major.
We're both reasonable men.
565
00:39:33,588 --> 00:39:36,090
I am not
a reasonable man.
566
00:39:36,124 --> 00:39:39,027
All the more reason
then that, uh--
567
00:39:39,060 --> 00:39:43,097
Tonight, at the fiesta
I will tell the people
all is well.
568
00:39:43,131 --> 00:39:45,900
All is well.
All is well.
569
00:39:45,934 --> 00:39:47,636
All is well.
All is well.
570
00:39:47,669 --> 00:39:52,040
Suddenly,
I am in a party mood.
571
00:39:52,073 --> 00:39:55,677
*
572
00:40:05,153 --> 00:40:09,524
Jose, have you seen
what they've done
to the baseball field?
573
00:40:09,558 --> 00:40:12,193
What's going
down, man?
Look.
574
00:40:12,226 --> 00:40:15,096
The governor says he's spoken
to them, and everything's
going to be all right.
575
00:40:15,129 --> 00:40:18,533
Where's McHale?
Isn't he coming?
He'll be here.
576
00:40:20,001 --> 00:40:21,803
Has he ever missed
a fiesta?
577
00:41:12,353 --> 00:41:14,188
I hope we are
not too late...
578
00:41:14,222 --> 00:41:16,925
for happy hour.
579
00:41:16,958 --> 00:41:19,093
Governor!
580
00:41:19,127 --> 00:41:22,664
Join the party.
581
00:41:22,697 --> 00:41:27,969
Your governor tells me
you are unhappy
with our presence here.
582
00:41:28,002 --> 00:41:30,238
He tells me
you have been
complaining...
583
00:41:30,271 --> 00:41:34,308
because the base
is too near
the village.
584
00:41:34,342 --> 00:41:37,746
So, we have
a solution.
585
00:41:39,080 --> 00:41:42,150
We move the village.
586
00:41:52,961 --> 00:41:56,230
Come on, guys.
It's party time.
587
00:42:05,439 --> 00:42:09,844
You traitor!
How much did he pay you
to betray your people?
588
00:42:11,913 --> 00:42:15,917
Major. Major,
please help me,
or they will kill me!
589
00:42:15,950 --> 00:42:18,186
Here. Take my hand.
590
00:42:18,219 --> 00:42:21,189
Thank you!
Psych!
591
00:42:21,222 --> 00:42:24,192
Major! Ma--
592
00:42:24,225 --> 00:42:26,661
I don't care
what anybody says.
593
00:42:26,695 --> 00:42:28,362
That's funny.
594
00:42:41,409 --> 00:42:44,012
Admiral, sir.
Yes, what is it?
595
00:42:44,045 --> 00:42:45,980
Photos from the satellite
look bad.
596
00:42:46,014 --> 00:42:47,716
There are supply ships,
transports.
597
00:42:47,749 --> 00:42:51,886
We also have reports of fires
on the island. We think this
man is running the operation.
598
00:42:52,754 --> 00:42:54,655
Vladakov.
599
00:42:56,257 --> 00:42:58,993
All right,
who's the commanding officer
we got down there right now?
600
00:42:59,027 --> 00:43:00,695
Uh, Captain Binghampton, sir.
601
00:43:00,729 --> 00:43:02,797
Binghampton. Binghampton!
602
00:43:02,831 --> 00:43:04,866
Isn't that the guy
that sank the Love Boat?
603
00:43:04,899 --> 00:43:08,469
Well, it-- it wasn't
the real Love Boat, sir.
604
00:43:08,502 --> 00:43:11,706
Oh. Well, let's get him
on the vid-link.
605
00:43:12,006 --> 00:43:13,842
Yes, sir.
606
00:43:15,910 --> 00:43:17,445
Vladakov.
607
00:43:18,780 --> 00:43:20,214
Carpenter!
What do you think?
608
00:43:20,248 --> 00:43:22,350
Hat on. Hat off.
609
00:43:22,383 --> 00:43:26,020
No, no. Hat on.
Makes me look intelligent.
610
00:43:26,054 --> 00:43:28,823
Captain, this is Cobra.
611
00:43:28,857 --> 00:43:32,994
Yes, Cobra!
This is Captain
Wallace B.--
612
00:43:33,027 --> 00:43:34,162
Let me get
right down to it.
613
00:43:34,195 --> 00:43:36,931
We have reason to believe
there is a terrorist cell...
614
00:43:36,965 --> 00:43:39,233
forming on an island
adjacent to your base.
615
00:43:39,267 --> 00:43:43,204
What?
Terrorists, here?
616
00:43:43,237 --> 00:43:44,873
I'll find them
for you, sir.
617
00:43:44,906 --> 00:43:47,275
Don't you worry about that.
I'll hunt them down like--
618
00:43:47,308 --> 00:43:50,078
Binghampton, you are
to d nothing.
619
00:43:50,111 --> 00:43:53,214
The last thing
the president wants
is more gunboat diplomacy.
620
00:43:53,247 --> 00:43:55,817
The president?
621
00:43:55,850 --> 00:43:57,819
How would you like us
to proceed, sir?
622
00:43:57,852 --> 00:43:59,353
There is one person
down there...
623
00:43:59,387 --> 00:44:02,891
who can handle
an up-close inspection.
624
00:44:02,924 --> 00:44:05,359
He was one of the top
covert operatives
in the navy.
625
00:44:05,393 --> 00:44:08,162
His name
is Quinton McHale.
626
00:44:08,196 --> 00:44:10,965
He should be somewhere
near your area.
627
00:44:10,999 --> 00:44:14,102
I'll try to locate him
for you, sir.
628
00:44:14,135 --> 00:44:16,337
Good. Cobra out.
629
00:44:17,438 --> 00:44:19,941
No.
What do you mean, no?
630
00:44:19,974 --> 00:44:21,475
No!
631
00:44:21,509 --> 00:44:23,377
The navy needs you, McHale.
632
00:44:23,411 --> 00:44:26,480
Give me a break.
Doesn't that mean
anything to you?
633
00:44:26,514 --> 00:44:28,883
You're just gonna
turn your back?
634
00:44:28,917 --> 00:44:32,220
I know all about the navy,
and about backs
getting turned.
635
00:44:32,253 --> 00:44:36,090
I could have told Washington
this is the way
you would react.
636
00:44:36,124 --> 00:44:38,827
I'm gonna do you
a favor, McHale.
637
00:44:38,860 --> 00:44:40,962
I'm gonna say
that I couldn't
find you.
638
00:44:40,995 --> 00:44:43,832
I'm gonna say
that you'd left the area.
639
00:44:43,865 --> 00:44:45,967
And you know what
you're going to do?
640
00:44:46,000 --> 00:44:48,069
You're going
to leave the area!
Now, get out!
641
00:44:49,537 --> 00:44:52,506
You know, you're annoying.
No wonder she dumped you.
642
00:44:52,540 --> 00:44:55,176
McHale, wait!
Carpenter, don't waste
your breath.
643
00:44:55,209 --> 00:44:58,112
This is an operation
I'm well equipped to handle.
But, sir--
644
00:44:58,146 --> 00:45:00,214
I've been waiting for this
my entire life,
645
00:45:00,248 --> 00:45:04,018
and believe me,
I could do this
with my eyes sewn shut,
646
00:45:04,052 --> 00:45:07,788
and both hands tied
behind my back--
647
00:45:11,893 --> 00:45:13,995
McHale!
648
00:45:32,546 --> 00:45:35,449
You guys okay?
649
00:45:37,185 --> 00:45:39,921
Looks like you had
a heck of a party here.
650
00:46:01,342 --> 00:46:03,144
Things are lookin' up.
651
00:46:05,146 --> 00:46:07,381
McHale.
652
00:46:07,415 --> 00:46:09,050
Hey, Roberto.
Where you been?
653
00:46:10,351 --> 00:46:12,120
Long story.
654
00:46:12,153 --> 00:46:15,289
Something terrible
has happened.
You noticed, huh?
655
00:46:15,323 --> 00:46:18,292
No, worse. The village
and the baseball field
are all gone.
656
00:46:19,293 --> 00:46:20,394
What are you talking about?
657
00:46:20,428 --> 00:46:22,163
That weird dude
I took pictures of,
658
00:46:22,196 --> 00:46:23,364
he destroyed everything.
659
00:46:41,715 --> 00:46:44,552
Here's the deal.
I'll do it, but
I'm gonna do it my way.
660
00:46:44,585 --> 00:46:46,520
Ha! Oh, no,
you're not.
661
00:46:46,554 --> 00:46:49,023
Let's call Cobra
and see what he thinks.
662
00:46:49,057 --> 00:46:52,460
Oh, but, uh--
663
00:46:52,493 --> 00:46:56,130
All right, McHale.
Now what do you mean
by "your way"?
664
00:46:56,164 --> 00:46:58,066
I want my boat back,
and I want
my old crew back.
665
00:46:58,099 --> 00:47:00,534
I want the barracks
on the far side
of the island.
666
00:47:00,568 --> 00:47:02,336
I want tents
and supplies
for 200 people,
667
00:47:02,370 --> 00:47:06,007
and, uh, also
six dozen freezers.
668
00:47:06,040 --> 00:47:09,510
Are you
out of your mind?
669
00:47:09,543 --> 00:47:11,545
D-- You stop
doing that!
670
00:47:11,579 --> 00:47:13,514
I want to be left alone.
I'll only answer
to Cobra.
671
00:47:13,547 --> 00:47:14,715
Do we have
an understanding?
672
00:47:14,748 --> 00:47:16,050
Yes.
673
00:47:17,751 --> 00:47:21,022
I-I-If it's all right
with the captain.
674
00:47:21,055 --> 00:47:23,491
No, it's not all right
with me.
675
00:47:28,229 --> 00:47:30,264
All right, McHale.
676
00:47:30,298 --> 00:47:33,267
I'm gonna give you
just enough rope
to hang yourself with,
677
00:47:33,301 --> 00:47:36,437
and if you screw up--
or I should say
whe you screw up--
678
00:47:36,470 --> 00:47:38,506
it's your butt,
mister.
679
00:47:40,041 --> 00:47:41,742
Welcome back, McHale.
680
00:47:41,775 --> 00:47:44,545
That's Lieutenant Commander
McHale to you, Carpenter.
681
00:47:44,578 --> 00:47:46,714
I know. It's weird.
682
00:48:25,719 --> 00:48:28,456
Man, this thing shrank.
683
00:48:31,425 --> 00:48:34,495
Hey, buddy.
Hey, hey,
hey, buddy.
684
00:48:44,172 --> 00:48:47,475
Boys, I give you
your new home.
685
00:48:50,578 --> 00:48:53,314
Well, we throw on some paint,
put up some curtains,
plant a shrub or two--
686
00:48:53,347 --> 00:48:55,449
And it'll still suck.
687
00:48:55,483 --> 00:48:59,753
I knew you guys would need
cheerin' up, so I've arranged
for a reunion. Come on.
688
00:49:09,863 --> 00:49:12,266
Hey, cool!
All right!
689
00:49:12,300 --> 00:49:15,436
Yes!
Thanks, Skip.
690
00:49:15,469 --> 00:49:17,371
Well, hey, Skip.
691
00:49:18,839 --> 00:49:20,808
I don't see
any of my stuff.
692
00:49:20,841 --> 00:49:24,412
Oh, yeah?
Come here.
693
00:49:24,445 --> 00:49:26,580
Christy, think fast.
694
00:49:26,614 --> 00:49:29,350
Thanks, Virgil.
695
00:49:29,383 --> 00:49:32,086
Hmm! Oh, yeah.
696
00:49:40,594 --> 00:49:44,732
Oh... you know,
there's a sensitive side
to you, Skipper.
697
00:49:44,765 --> 00:49:46,834
Thanks, little buddy.
698
00:49:46,867 --> 00:49:48,769
Hey, Skip,
thanks for the stuff.
699
00:49:48,802 --> 00:49:50,838
It's great to be
back together
again, man.
700
00:49:50,871 --> 00:49:52,573
So, Skip, what kind
of mission are we on?
701
00:49:52,606 --> 00:49:54,308
Hey, Skip!
702
00:49:55,643 --> 00:49:58,746
Looks like we've got
some company.
703
00:50:15,596 --> 00:50:17,465
All right, guys,
help 'em out.
704
00:50:17,498 --> 00:50:19,467
Hey, Roberto,
how ya doin'?
705
00:50:19,500 --> 00:50:22,203
Come on, kids.
How ya doin'?
706
00:50:22,236 --> 00:50:25,639
Come on over.
707
00:50:25,673 --> 00:50:27,741
Come on. How are ya?
I've got some great news.
708
00:50:27,775 --> 00:50:30,711
I've got a hundred tents
set up for you guys.
Just one catch.
709
00:50:30,744 --> 00:50:33,581
What's that?
I was lying about
them being set up.
710
00:50:33,614 --> 00:50:35,716
I'll make you a deal.
We'll take care
of the tents.
711
00:50:35,749 --> 00:50:38,152
You just get
our island back.
712
00:50:38,186 --> 00:50:41,455
I'll make you that deal
if you do something
about my boat.
713
00:50:41,489 --> 00:50:42,923
Have you been fiddling
with it again?
714
00:50:42,956 --> 00:50:46,860
Hey, if I was fiddling
with it, you wouldn't
have to fix it. Come on.
715
00:50:49,330 --> 00:50:51,865
Come in.
716
00:50:51,899 --> 00:50:54,868
Ensign Parker here, sir.
You wanted to see me?
717
00:50:54,902 --> 00:50:58,339
Uh, yes, Parker.
718
00:50:58,372 --> 00:51:00,641
I don't think
that I've shown you...
719
00:51:00,674 --> 00:51:02,776
the respect
that you deserve.
720
00:51:02,810 --> 00:51:05,246
Have you been getting
the fruit baskets
I've been sending you, sir?
721
00:51:05,913 --> 00:51:08,516
Yes.
722
00:51:08,549 --> 00:51:10,718
Yes.
723
00:51:10,751 --> 00:51:12,453
You know, Ensign,
724
00:51:12,486 --> 00:51:14,588
I think it's possible...
725
00:51:14,622 --> 00:51:16,957
that you're
lieutenant material,
726
00:51:16,990 --> 00:51:19,693
and I have an assignment
for you that just might
prove that.
727
00:51:19,727 --> 00:51:22,463
Sir, I am ready
for anything.
728
00:51:22,496 --> 00:51:25,699
Good. I want you
to go to McHale's base,
find out what's going on,
729
00:51:25,733 --> 00:51:28,302
get every drop
of information,
and report back to me.
730
00:51:28,336 --> 00:51:30,471
Understood?
Thank you, sir.
731
00:51:30,504 --> 00:51:33,407
Well, hop to it!
Oh, y-yes, sir.
732
00:52:15,015 --> 00:52:18,619
The best I can figure,
this building here
is a command center.
733
00:52:18,652 --> 00:52:23,491
The rest looks like standard
stuff, if you're building
a gigantic missile silo.
734
00:52:23,524 --> 00:52:26,794
But it's so out
in the open. Vladakov's
an underground terrorist.
735
00:52:26,827 --> 00:52:30,264
I can't believe he'd do
something this big on the
doorstep of a U.S. naval base.
736
00:52:30,298 --> 00:52:31,899
How do you know this chump?
737
00:52:31,932 --> 00:52:34,001
We lived together
for a while.
738
00:52:34,034 --> 00:52:38,272
Oh. I didn't know.
Not that I'm judging you
or anything.
739
00:52:38,306 --> 00:52:40,974
At Quantico. He trained
as a double agent
under Cobra.
740
00:52:41,008 --> 00:52:43,477
Oh.
I heard that this guy's
supposed to be like...
741
00:52:43,511 --> 00:52:45,879
the second-best terrorist
in the world.
742
00:52:45,913 --> 00:52:48,048
Yeah, but he wanted
to be the best,
and then he got greedy.
743
00:52:48,081 --> 00:52:50,618
After we captured him,
the Pentagon said...
744
00:52:50,651 --> 00:52:53,454
we couldn't
keep both of them,
so we had to let him go.
745
00:52:53,487 --> 00:52:54,988
So he got away clean?
746
00:52:55,022 --> 00:52:57,725
Not exactly.
We made a little detour
on the way.
747
00:52:57,758 --> 00:53:00,794
My name and this face
are two things
he's never gonna forget.
748
00:53:00,828 --> 00:53:02,730
What?
749
00:53:02,763 --> 00:53:05,599
Help! Help!
What is that?
750
00:53:05,633 --> 00:53:09,603
Help! Help! Help!
751
00:53:09,637 --> 00:53:13,741
Help! Help! Help!
752
00:53:13,774 --> 00:53:16,744
McHale!
753
00:53:16,777 --> 00:53:18,546
Fish him out, boys.
Help!
754
00:53:18,579 --> 00:53:19,880
Help!
755
00:53:19,913 --> 00:53:24,318
Help! Help!
756
00:53:24,352 --> 00:53:26,320
Oh! Thanks.
Thanks, guys.
757
00:53:26,354 --> 00:53:28,322
Thanks.
Thanks, guys.
758
00:53:28,356 --> 00:53:30,524
Thanks. Thanks.
Oh!
759
00:53:30,558 --> 00:53:34,027
I saw fish out there,
big fish.
I saw a marlin--
760
00:53:38,932 --> 00:53:42,503
I bet you're wondering
what I'm doing with a piece
of driftwood on my head?
761
00:53:42,536 --> 00:53:44,605
That's only one
of many questions.
762
00:53:44,638 --> 00:53:46,407
Don't you want to hear
about the driftwood?
763
00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:48,342
I was going
for a natural look.
764
00:53:48,376 --> 00:53:50,678
Let him go, guys.
765
00:53:50,711 --> 00:53:53,614
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute, guys.
766
00:53:53,647 --> 00:53:55,683
Guys, come on.
This is really
uncomfortable.
767
00:53:55,716 --> 00:53:58,486
Binghampton sent you here
to spy on us, didn't he?
768
00:53:58,519 --> 00:54:01,989
I'm not tellin' you a thing
until you pop me.
Come on and pop me!
769
00:54:08,896 --> 00:54:10,898
What are you gonna do
with that thing?
770
00:54:10,931 --> 00:54:13,734
Aaah!
771
00:54:22,643 --> 00:54:25,746
You okay, Parker?
Put me in the game, coach.
772
00:54:25,779 --> 00:54:29,550
I'll get a touchdown
fourth quarter.
Snap out of it.
773
00:54:29,583 --> 00:54:32,486
Since we've already burst
your bubble, I'm gonna
lay it to you straight.
774
00:54:32,520 --> 00:54:35,489
We're goin' to Vladakov's
and find out how come
he put a terrorist camp...
775
00:54:35,523 --> 00:54:36,890
in our friendly
little neighborhood here.
776
00:54:36,924 --> 00:54:40,394
Now, if you wanna tell
Binghampton, I'd be happy
to take you there,
777
00:54:40,428 --> 00:54:42,696
but I think you'd rather
stay here and help us out.
778
00:54:42,730 --> 00:54:45,699
You gonna give me
something important
to do?
779
00:54:46,634 --> 00:54:49,603
Absolutely.
780
00:54:49,637 --> 00:54:52,906
I love you guys!
Buddy check!
781
00:54:52,940 --> 00:54:56,376
All right, watch my fins.
Guys, watch my--
782
00:55:08,922 --> 00:55:11,559
Come on, stupe.
Hurry up.
I'm cookin' as fast as I can.
783
00:55:11,592 --> 00:55:14,962
Turn 'em around the right way.
Sorry. It didn't come
with a manual.
784
00:55:14,995 --> 00:55:18,499
That's gonna be
a pretty big
satellite station.
785
00:55:18,532 --> 00:55:19,467
Looks like it,
doesn't it?
786
00:55:20,534 --> 00:55:22,069
We're in.
787
00:55:32,713 --> 00:55:34,748
All right, Gruber, Willie,
check out the far side.
788
00:55:34,782 --> 00:55:37,751
Right.
Christy, Virgil,
go south.
789
00:55:37,785 --> 00:55:41,021
South.
Happy and I
are gonna go north.
790
00:55:41,054 --> 00:55:43,891
What do you want me to do?
That's our only way
out of here.
791
00:55:43,924 --> 00:55:45,993
Guard it.
792
00:56:04,812 --> 00:56:06,914
Willie, look
at that rocket.
793
00:56:06,947 --> 00:56:09,550
That's big enough
to start World War III.
794
00:56:17,725 --> 00:56:20,794
[ Shouting,
Indistinct ]
795
00:56:32,540 --> 00:56:35,543
Whoa! Yes!
796
00:56:35,576 --> 00:56:38,579
I bet this is their
munitions depot.
797
00:56:38,612 --> 00:56:40,480
Gee. You suppose?
798
00:56:44,852 --> 00:56:46,419
Major?
Yes?
799
00:56:46,453 --> 00:56:49,189
Everything appears to be
on schedule for rendezvous
with Feckler.
800
00:56:49,222 --> 00:56:52,893
With no complications,
we are fully operational
in 35 hours.
801
00:56:52,926 --> 00:56:54,762
There will be
no complications!
802
00:56:54,795 --> 00:56:57,765
I will neither allow
nor tolerate failure!
803
00:56:57,798 --> 00:57:00,801
Speaking of which,
where is my vodka?
804
00:57:00,834 --> 00:57:04,905
Has it arrived yet?
You! Go and see!
805
00:57:04,938 --> 00:57:07,207
Schnell! Schnell!
806
00:57:09,342 --> 00:57:11,311
Real important part
the mission.
807
00:57:11,344 --> 00:57:13,547
Oh, they couldn't
do without me.
808
00:57:13,581 --> 00:57:15,949
Let's see how they feel
when they don't have
Equipment Guy there at--
809
00:57:20,153 --> 00:57:22,990
[ Laughing,
Chatting In Russian ]
810
00:58:21,414 --> 00:58:23,350
You okay?
Yeah, yeah.
Fine. Let's go.
811
00:58:24,685 --> 00:58:25,719
What's that?
We need it.
812
00:58:25,753 --> 00:58:26,987
It's cable-ready.
813
00:58:27,020 --> 00:58:28,889
Come on, guys.
814
00:58:28,922 --> 00:58:32,693
Why don't you just put up
a big sign that says
we came here and stole stuff?
815
00:58:40,267 --> 00:58:43,971
Okay, we can't
take everything.
Um, leave the guns.
816
00:58:47,240 --> 00:58:48,876
Everything is
going beautifully
817
00:58:48,909 --> 00:58:50,944
and according to plan.
818
00:58:50,978 --> 00:58:54,014
There's no need to keep
calling me all the time.
819
00:58:57,350 --> 00:58:58,719
Hello! Hello!
820
00:58:58,752 --> 00:59:03,223
We are not going
to get anywhere if you all
talk at the same time.
821
00:59:03,256 --> 00:59:05,125
Listen, we know you're
a little sensitive
822
00:59:05,158 --> 00:59:06,660
when it comes to what
appears to be criticism.
823
00:59:06,694 --> 00:59:09,129
When dealing
with the number two terrorist,
824
00:59:09,162 --> 00:59:11,098
there's reason
to be concerned.
825
00:59:11,131 --> 00:59:13,200
We need reassurances
that everything
is all right.
826
00:59:13,233 --> 00:59:15,335
Let me assure you that--
827
00:59:15,368 --> 00:59:18,371
Major, something
terrible has happened!
Someone has stolen a--
828
00:59:20,040 --> 00:59:21,675
Just give me a minute.
829
00:59:23,844 --> 00:59:26,113
I am sorry. I am sorry.
I am so, so sorry.
830
00:59:26,146 --> 00:59:29,216
What is it?
831
00:59:29,249 --> 00:59:32,853
Someone has stolen a piece of
the core cylinder. I thought
you would want to know.
832
00:59:32,886 --> 00:59:35,155
I-I could go ahead
and order a replacement,
833
00:59:35,188 --> 00:59:37,424
but I think if they hear
from you, they might move
a little faster.
834
00:59:37,457 --> 00:59:41,729
Wait... here.
835
00:59:45,265 --> 00:59:46,466
Is something wrong?
What's going on?
836
00:59:46,499 --> 00:59:48,869
We heard something
about stealing.
837
00:59:48,902 --> 00:59:52,740
No, no. Nothing's wrong.
Everything's fine. Trust me.
838
00:59:52,773 --> 00:59:56,243
Hey, we don't appreciate
that tone--
839
00:59:56,276 --> 00:59:59,379
So what do you think
they're gonna do
with a giant missile thing?
840
00:59:59,412 --> 01:00:02,716
You got me, 'cause they also
got a lot of ground-based
assault weapons.
841
01:00:02,750 --> 01:00:04,417
The thing that doesn't
make any sense is:
842
01:00:04,451 --> 01:00:07,387
Doesn't Vladakov know
the second we see
that missile,
843
01:00:07,420 --> 01:00:10,057
the troops are gonna come in
and wipe him out?
844
01:00:11,391 --> 01:00:13,894
Parker?
What?
I didn't do anything.
845
01:00:16,129 --> 01:00:17,430
What happened?
846
01:00:18,999 --> 01:00:21,001
I'm a terrible officer.
847
01:00:21,034 --> 01:00:25,372
I got pouty, I wandered off
and, well, then I broke this.
848
01:00:29,910 --> 01:00:33,146
Skip?
849
01:00:33,180 --> 01:00:35,749
You think you can rustle up
one of those vid-links
for me real quick?
850
01:00:35,783 --> 01:00:37,450
That's why I'm here.
851
01:00:40,888 --> 01:00:44,724
Great work, Parker.
Thanks a lot, Skip.
852
01:00:46,193 --> 01:00:47,260
That's better.
That's better.
853
01:00:47,294 --> 01:00:50,864
You say one of your men
disengaged the core cylinder?
854
01:00:50,898 --> 01:00:53,901
That's brilliant!
Yeah, thanks, but I think it's
only gonna slow Vladakov down.
855
01:00:53,934 --> 01:00:58,105
It's not gonna stop him.
It'll give us time to come up
with a plan to neutralize him.
856
01:00:58,138 --> 01:01:02,075
We better quick. He's building
a satellite dish that's gonna
be operational soon.
857
01:01:02,109 --> 01:01:06,379
He also mentioned,
uh, a rendezvous
with someone named Feckler?
858
01:01:06,413 --> 01:01:09,416
Feckler?
He knows about Feckler?
859
01:01:09,449 --> 01:01:11,985
Who's Feckler?
It's the name
of my pet project.
860
01:01:12,019 --> 01:01:14,354
The world's most advanced
and-- until now--
861
01:01:14,387 --> 01:01:18,258
secret Satellite Tracking
Weapons Guidance System,
or SiTWiGS.
862
01:01:18,291 --> 01:01:20,360
Why'd you call it "Feckler"?
863
01:01:20,393 --> 01:01:22,796
We already had something
called "SiTWiGS."
864
01:01:23,563 --> 01:01:26,233
Here. Let me
show you something.
865
01:01:26,266 --> 01:01:30,137
The satellite is a G.P.S.
system for missile guidance.
866
01:01:30,170 --> 01:01:32,105
It enables us to hit
any target
867
01:01:32,139 --> 01:01:34,975
in the world
within six inches.
868
01:01:35,008 --> 01:01:38,111
It comes around once a day
to change its launch codes.
869
01:01:38,145 --> 01:01:41,014
Yeah, but from what I saw,
Vladakov's set up
to steal those codes.
870
01:01:41,048 --> 01:01:44,351
That's why I need you
to try and jam Vladakov...
871
01:01:44,384 --> 01:01:46,987
to buy us some time
until we can get there.
872
01:01:47,020 --> 01:01:50,390
I'll get back to you.
Cobra out.
873
01:01:50,423 --> 01:01:52,259
Can we do it, Willie?
874
01:01:52,292 --> 01:01:53,493
Well, not with our equipment.
875
01:01:53,526 --> 01:01:55,262
They have
that Soviet-era crap.
876
01:01:55,295 --> 01:01:57,264
We're gonna need
the same stuff
to be compatible.
877
01:01:57,297 --> 01:02:01,401
How we gonna dig that up?
When I think of Soviet-era
crap, I think of Cuba.
878
01:02:12,579 --> 01:02:14,547
Welcome to Cuba, boys.
879
01:02:14,581 --> 01:02:16,449
Land of oppression
and opportunity.
880
01:02:28,996 --> 01:02:34,234
Hello, Havana.
I am gonna score enough cigars
to keep me puffin' for a year.
881
01:02:34,267 --> 01:02:37,971
Hey, guys, we are here
on a mission.
I got a mission of my own.
882
01:02:38,005 --> 01:02:41,341
Knock it off, guys!
Come on. We got a job to do.
883
01:02:54,354 --> 01:02:56,156
All right, fellas,
listen up.
884
01:02:56,189 --> 01:02:57,590
I'm gonna go in
and make the deal.
I'll be right back.
885
01:02:57,624 --> 01:02:59,927
You guys just
hang out, okay?
886
01:02:59,960 --> 01:03:02,062
Hang out.
887
01:03:02,095 --> 01:03:04,397
All right, who's got
the Hackey Sack?
Got it.
888
01:03:04,431 --> 01:03:07,634
Oh, oh, oh.
I got it.
889
01:03:07,667 --> 01:03:10,403
Ow! Where'd it go?
890
01:03:14,541 --> 01:03:17,978
Excuse me.
Is Armando around?
891
01:03:18,011 --> 01:03:21,214
Armando is dead.
Boy, I'm sorry
to hear that.
892
01:03:24,417 --> 01:03:26,453
Armando lives.
893
01:03:28,221 --> 01:03:32,292
There is someone here
to see you.
894
01:03:36,563 --> 01:03:39,466
Hey, buddy.
895
01:03:39,499 --> 01:03:43,270
Hey, McHale. What's happening,
man
Good. What you been up to?
896
01:03:43,303 --> 01:03:46,006
Oh, a little bit of this,
a little bit of that.
897
01:03:46,039 --> 01:03:49,509
Mostly having flashbacks
of concerts I haven't
been to yet, you know?
898
01:03:49,542 --> 01:03:52,145
Hey, you came
at a good time, my friend.
Why
899
01:03:53,280 --> 01:03:55,548
Yeah, okay.
Good.
900
01:03:55,582 --> 01:04:00,287
I need one of those
S.S.B. transceivers.
I'll give you 600 bucks.
901
01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:02,522
You know, I may not remember
30 years of my life, man,
902
01:04:02,555 --> 01:04:04,992
but I remember
those things cost 700.
903
01:04:05,025 --> 01:04:07,394
Really? Well, I can get 'em
in Damascus for five.
904
01:04:07,427 --> 01:04:10,430
Hey, last time I looked,
we weren't in Damascus, man.
905
01:04:13,300 --> 01:04:16,303
Thank you.
I also need one of those
heat-seeking torpedo warheads,
906
01:04:16,336 --> 01:04:20,407
I need two battery
eliminators, one of those
satellite uplink units...
907
01:04:20,440 --> 01:04:23,476
and 5,000 rounds
of 50-caliber ammo.
Hey, no problem, man.
908
01:04:23,510 --> 01:04:27,014
And, uh, I also need, uh,
some parts...
909
01:04:27,047 --> 01:04:30,183
for a 1942 Packard
P.T. boat engine.
910
01:04:30,217 --> 01:04:32,986
Oh, now, that might be
tough, man. Those Packards
are very hard to fi--
911
01:04:33,020 --> 01:04:37,991
Well, I got
a cousin, man. Ernesto.
He'll take care of you.
912
01:04:38,025 --> 01:04:39,426
Hey, guys,
I don't see it.
913
01:04:39,459 --> 01:04:42,262
It's a round sack.
It's got beans in it.
914
01:04:42,295 --> 01:04:45,132
Listen up, guys.
We need to take this
back to the boat.
915
01:04:45,165 --> 01:04:47,334
Me and Jose are going to go
buy some engine parts.
916
01:04:47,367 --> 01:04:49,736
Mr. Parker's in charge.
Why, thanks, Skip.
917
01:04:49,769 --> 01:04:52,439
All right, guys,
let's go. Head out!
918
01:04:55,042 --> 01:04:58,078
Come on!
919
01:05:01,181 --> 01:05:04,451
*
920
01:05:07,620 --> 01:05:09,689
Gruber, that's the place
right there.
921
01:05:09,722 --> 01:05:13,060
Uh, gee, Mr. Parker.
McHale forgot something.
922
01:05:13,093 --> 01:05:15,128
Really
Uh--
923
01:05:15,162 --> 01:05:18,465
Oh. It's, uh...
Olsen coaxial monitor cable.
924
01:05:19,766 --> 01:05:21,601
An Olsen coaxial
monitor cable?
Yep.
925
01:05:21,634 --> 01:05:25,138
Uh, heck, yeah, Mr. Parker.
I can't tap into a Soviet
satellite system...
926
01:05:25,172 --> 01:05:27,274
without a Olsen
coaxial monitor cable.
927
01:05:27,307 --> 01:05:30,810
Nope.
Well, of course.
928
01:05:30,843 --> 01:05:32,812
We'll meet you
back at the boat.
Yeah.
929
01:05:32,845 --> 01:05:36,049
Right.
Wait a minute.
930
01:05:39,519 --> 01:05:43,690
You guys better get, um,
two of those, uh, Olsen
coaxial monitor cables...
931
01:05:43,723 --> 01:05:47,094
just to be
on the safe side.
Right.
932
01:05:47,127 --> 01:05:49,462
That's why
you're the C.O.
Always thinkin'.
933
01:05:52,199 --> 01:05:54,434
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
934
01:05:54,467 --> 01:05:57,404
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
935
01:05:57,437 --> 01:06:02,709
*
936
01:06:04,744 --> 01:06:07,314
* Es el nuevo
937
01:06:08,481 --> 01:06:11,751
Boys, every man
for himself.
938
01:06:13,520 --> 01:06:17,090
* Es el nuevo
Buenos noches,
senorita.
939
01:06:17,124 --> 01:06:20,160
Buena.
Are you nueve in town?
940
01:06:22,729 --> 01:06:26,065
Bartender, dos martinis,
por favor.
941
01:06:32,672 --> 01:06:34,707
Is this called "poker"?
942
01:06:34,741 --> 01:06:36,676
I would like so much
to learn the game...
943
01:06:36,709 --> 01:06:39,346
and bring it back
to my native land.
944
01:06:39,379 --> 01:06:42,682
But I only have
a couple of hundred dollars.
945
01:06:54,461 --> 01:06:56,496
Ahh!
946
01:07:02,369 --> 01:07:05,405
Rack 'em, amigo.
947
01:07:06,939 --> 01:07:10,877
And... it's your roll,
banana bud.
948
01:07:13,913 --> 01:07:16,249
Okay.
949
01:07:18,385 --> 01:07:21,454
Okay, let's just roll, okay?
Let's go.
950
01:07:26,926 --> 01:07:29,196
Oh, God. Oh!
951
01:07:37,737 --> 01:07:39,772
Ernesto?
952
01:07:39,806 --> 01:07:41,841
That's me.
953
01:07:41,874 --> 01:07:45,745
Armando!
Oh, yeah. We're twins.
954
01:07:45,778 --> 01:07:48,515
I thought you
were cousins.
Uh, yeah, yeah.
955
01:07:48,548 --> 01:07:50,850
Yeah. We're-- Yeah.
We're twin cousins, man.
956
01:07:50,883 --> 01:07:53,586
It's funny, man.
Everybody in my family,
we all look alike, man.
957
01:07:53,620 --> 01:07:55,622
Even my dog, man,
looks just like me.
958
01:07:55,655 --> 01:07:58,358
Hey, you want boat parts, man?
I got something to show you.
959
01:07:58,891 --> 01:08:01,561
Come here.
960
01:08:01,928 --> 01:08:03,430
Check it out, man.
961
01:08:03,463 --> 01:08:05,565
Twin turbos,
nitrous injected.
962
01:08:05,598 --> 01:08:07,700
I really put my heart
into this, man.
963
01:08:07,734 --> 01:08:09,569
I don't think
I can sell it.
964
01:08:09,602 --> 01:08:11,571
Well, maybe I can.
965
01:08:11,604 --> 01:08:14,441
All right.
Load it up.
966
01:08:14,474 --> 01:08:16,543
You heard the man.
Load it up, man!
967
01:08:23,283 --> 01:08:25,952
[ Pistol Shots
Continue ]
968
01:08:30,022 --> 01:08:33,593
* Baby, baby
Won't you hear my-- *
You're cheating.
969
01:08:33,626 --> 01:08:35,495
Let me see your dice.
970
01:08:38,398 --> 01:08:40,500
Just as I thought--
loaded dice.
971
01:08:40,533 --> 01:08:42,569
Who raised you, monkey?
972
01:08:44,504 --> 01:08:46,339
I did.
That's my monkey.
973
01:08:46,373 --> 01:08:49,442
Well, I can kinda see
the resemblance.
974
01:08:49,476 --> 01:08:53,846
* Baby, baby
Won't you hear my plea *
975
01:08:53,880 --> 01:08:56,316
Oh--
976
01:08:56,349 --> 01:08:58,518
Heh-heh-heh.
977
01:09:04,557 --> 01:09:06,859
Hey, Happy.
What are you doin'?
978
01:09:06,893 --> 01:09:10,430
Well, it appears
I insulted a monkey.
Hey!
979
01:09:11,631 --> 01:09:13,866
Thank you.
I'm sorry.
980
01:09:13,900 --> 01:09:16,002
Whoa!
981
01:09:20,907 --> 01:09:22,942
Yes, well, my stuntmen
have arrived.
982
01:09:22,975 --> 01:09:25,412
Excuse me. I've got
to go rehearse.
983
01:09:27,347 --> 01:09:29,716
Hey, Happy.
How you doin'?
984
01:09:29,749 --> 01:09:32,419
Peachy.
Behind ya.
985
01:09:37,490 --> 01:09:39,526
Duck.
986
01:09:40,360 --> 01:09:41,661
Yaaaah!
987
01:09:41,694 --> 01:09:42,795
Hey, hey!
988
01:09:46,032 --> 01:09:48,668
Hey, Virg. How's that
rehearsal goin'?
Uh, fine, Willie.
989
01:09:49,702 --> 01:09:52,472
I think it's your cue.
990
01:09:52,505 --> 01:09:55,375
Thank you.
991
01:09:55,408 --> 01:09:58,077
Looked pretty real,
didn't it?
992
01:09:58,110 --> 01:10:01,481
Did I ever tell you
about the time I--
Whoa! Aaah!
993
01:10:01,514 --> 01:10:03,683
Hey, Christy. Today!
994
01:10:10,490 --> 01:10:12,559
Get a haircut.
995
01:10:21,501 --> 01:10:26,339
La Policia!
996
01:10:26,373 --> 01:10:30,343
Whoa. Whoa, whoa!
All right, all right!
997
01:10:30,377 --> 01:10:33,813
Seems like beginner's luck.
998
01:10:33,846 --> 01:10:38,485
Well, look at the time.
I think I hear my ride.
999
01:10:38,518 --> 01:10:42,021
Uh, I'm in
the San Ysidro book.
1000
01:10:45,124 --> 01:10:47,860
You Commies fight
like a bunch of girls.
1001
01:11:02,909 --> 01:11:05,878
Hey, Parker.
Where's the guys?
1002
01:11:05,912 --> 01:11:07,346
Oh, they'll be back soon.
1003
01:11:07,380 --> 01:11:11,418
They went back to get those
Olsen coaxial monitor cable
things you forgot.
1004
01:11:11,451 --> 01:11:13,753
Oh, Chuck.
Oh, boy.
1005
01:11:13,786 --> 01:11:16,889
Skip. Skip, the guys
got busted by the cops.
1006
01:11:16,923 --> 01:11:19,826
All right, you stay here,
load up the boat. Come on!
1007
01:11:22,429 --> 01:11:24,631
Sí. Sí, that's what I said.
1008
01:11:24,664 --> 01:11:28,167
Huh?
Four American navy sailors.
1009
01:11:28,200 --> 01:11:30,503
i'Bueno!
1010
01:11:30,537 --> 01:11:33,139
Manuel! These four men
will be my calling card...
1011
01:11:33,172 --> 01:11:35,141
to meet El Presidente,
1012
01:11:35,174 --> 01:11:39,479
the man who has given me,
given our people all of this.
1013
01:11:39,512 --> 01:11:41,514
Hey, senor.
1014
01:11:41,548 --> 01:11:43,483
We wanna call our embassy.
1015
01:11:43,516 --> 01:11:45,418
Yeah?
Well, you just shut up!
1016
01:11:45,452 --> 01:11:47,654
You Anglo Yankee pig dog.
1017
01:11:47,687 --> 01:11:50,523
That was a good one.
1018
01:11:57,664 --> 01:11:59,398
What?
1019
01:12:00,199 --> 01:12:03,135
i'El Presidente!
1020
01:12:05,004 --> 01:12:08,508
Release the American pig dogs
into our custody.
1021
01:12:08,541 --> 01:12:12,111
Manuel, go get
the prisoners.
1022
01:12:17,850 --> 01:12:21,087
It is such an honor,
El Presidente.
1023
01:12:21,120 --> 01:12:24,891
I was just telling Manuel here
it has been my lifelong dream
to meet you.
1024
01:12:24,924 --> 01:12:26,759
What's that, El Presidente?
1025
01:12:28,528 --> 01:12:29,696
El Presidente said
1026
01:12:29,729 --> 01:12:30,963
he would be honored
to have the cigars...
1027
01:12:30,997 --> 01:12:32,799
of the brave men
who captured the Americans.
1028
01:12:32,832 --> 01:12:34,634
Of course!
1029
01:12:34,667 --> 01:12:36,769
What's ours
is El Presidente's.
1030
01:12:36,803 --> 01:12:38,905
In that case,
he'd be honored to have
your shirt, tie,
1031
01:12:38,938 --> 01:12:42,141
sunglasses and-- why not--
your pants too.
1032
01:12:47,213 --> 01:12:50,650
Manuel, El Presidente
has honored us.
1033
01:12:50,683 --> 01:12:53,553
He is asking
for our ties and our shirts
and our sunglasses...
1034
01:12:53,586 --> 01:12:56,623
and-- why not--
our pants too, eh?
1035
01:12:56,656 --> 01:13:00,660
And now we'll bring
the American dogs
to the pound.
1036
01:13:00,693 --> 01:13:04,196
Sí, sí.
1037
01:13:04,230 --> 01:13:07,834
Wait! i'El Presidente!
Por favor. 3Un foto, eh?
1038
01:13:07,867 --> 01:13:11,037
Oh, El Presidente would love
to take a photo.
1039
01:13:11,070 --> 01:13:13,105
But El Presidente
is in such a big hurry!
1040
01:13:13,139 --> 01:13:15,542
How dare you
give me orders!
Ow! Ow! Ow!
1041
01:13:15,575 --> 01:13:17,577
Why are you pinching
El Presidente?
1042
01:13:19,245 --> 01:13:21,981
Oh! Oh!
i'Arrivederci!
1043
01:13:30,823 --> 01:13:33,560
Presidente!
It's so nice to meet you.
1044
01:13:37,664 --> 01:13:39,966
El Presidente.
1045
01:13:39,999 --> 01:13:43,536
All right, guys.
We've only got a few hours,
so let's get set up.
1046
01:13:48,941 --> 01:13:51,243
Hey.
1047
01:13:51,277 --> 01:13:54,046
How did my father die,
McHale?
1048
01:13:54,080 --> 01:13:55,915
Well, you know, I probably
shouldn't be talkin'...
1049
01:13:55,948 --> 01:13:58,250
about top-secret stuff
like that with an 11-year-old.
1050
01:14:07,093 --> 01:14:09,596
Was a good-lookin' man,
wasn't he?
1051
01:14:09,629 --> 01:14:12,131
Yeah, we were best friends.
He was a lot of fun.
1052
01:14:12,164 --> 01:14:14,801
And he really loved you.
1053
01:14:14,834 --> 01:14:17,970
He was also
a great soldier.
1054
01:14:18,004 --> 01:14:20,039
Very brave.
1055
01:14:20,072 --> 01:14:24,110
He found out that
Vladakov was a bad guy
and had set us all up.
1056
01:14:24,143 --> 01:14:27,814
Your dad ended up
saving a lot of lives,
including mine.
1057
01:14:27,847 --> 01:14:31,083
Trouble was,
he couldn't save his own.
1058
01:14:32,218 --> 01:14:33,920
I'll kill Vladakov myself!
1059
01:14:33,953 --> 01:14:37,857
No. I lost your dad,
and I'm not gonna lose you.
1060
01:14:37,890 --> 01:14:39,992
I'm gonna get him.
I guarantee it.
1061
01:14:41,360 --> 01:14:43,663
What if he gets you first?
1062
01:14:43,696 --> 01:14:46,699
I'm not a bettin' man, but--
1063
01:14:46,733 --> 01:14:49,969
Wait a minute.
I am a bettin' man.
1064
01:14:50,002 --> 01:14:52,872
I'm gonna bet on me,
and I think you should too.
1065
01:14:52,905 --> 01:14:55,675
Everything's
gonna be okay, kid.
1066
01:14:55,708 --> 01:14:57,677
All right?
1067
01:14:57,710 --> 01:15:00,647
Now, listen.
I need to go take a shower.
1068
01:15:00,680 --> 01:15:02,214
So you know
what that means?
1069
01:15:02,248 --> 01:15:04,951
Don't flush.
That's right.
1070
01:15:28,107 --> 01:15:30,877
Major, everything seems
to be on schedule,
1071
01:15:30,910 --> 01:15:32,745
uh, except
for the core cylinder.
1072
01:15:32,779 --> 01:15:36,015
And where is it?
They promised it soon.
1073
01:15:41,287 --> 01:15:44,791
The plane! The plane!
Don't shoot.
1074
01:15:44,824 --> 01:15:46,693
It's one of ours.
1075
01:15:47,894 --> 01:15:50,797
Aaah!
Our new cylinder has arrived.
1076
01:15:50,830 --> 01:15:54,000
And look!
There's a note.
Yes?
1077
01:15:54,033 --> 01:15:57,937
"Dear Vladakov,
We have found out about this.
1078
01:15:57,970 --> 01:16:03,242
We are not very happy,
you lying sack of--"
1079
01:16:03,275 --> 01:16:07,379
Brilliance,
intestinal fortitude,
flexibility in crisis...
1080
01:16:07,413 --> 01:16:09,415
a
1081
01:16:13,152 --> 01:16:18,090
I've just flashed
upon a happier time.
1082
01:16:21,060 --> 01:16:23,162
I would run.
1083
01:16:26,498 --> 01:16:28,735
Schnell! Schnell!
1084
01:16:33,405 --> 01:16:36,743
Hey, Skip.
It's Cobra.
1085
01:16:36,776 --> 01:16:39,812
McHale, our operatives
have discovered...
1086
01:16:39,846 --> 01:16:42,815
that Vladakov plans
to destroy the Pentagon.
1087
01:16:42,849 --> 01:16:45,351
It must be 'cause they're
havin' that world conference
on terrorism this week.
1088
01:16:45,384 --> 01:16:47,386
Right. And the president's
gonna be there
1089
01:16:47,419 --> 01:16:49,155
along with heads
of 27 other countries.
1090
01:16:49,188 --> 01:16:51,357
Boy, he wants to be
number one real bad.
1091
01:16:51,390 --> 01:16:54,894
He's a loose cannon
and he knows how we operate.
Be careful.
1092
01:16:54,927 --> 01:16:58,965
We will, sir. I've got
a great crew and we've
got the equipment we need.
1093
01:16:58,998 --> 01:17:01,100
We're gonna be ready
to go in about an hour.
1094
01:17:01,133 --> 01:17:05,337
McHale.
Hey, I thought you killed
that guy.
1095
01:17:07,774 --> 01:17:10,977
Ow!
Did I get him?
1096
01:17:14,914 --> 01:17:17,283
Not quite, sir.
1097
01:17:17,316 --> 01:17:20,019
So, is this gonna work?
I hope so.
1098
01:17:20,052 --> 01:17:22,421
Don't let that idiot
Binghampton get in your way.
1099
01:17:22,454 --> 01:17:25,157
He's too busy gettin'
in his own way, sir.
1100
01:17:25,191 --> 01:17:26,959
Hey, you're still stockin'
that good cognac?
1101
01:17:26,993 --> 01:17:28,895
Yeah. Why?
1102
01:17:28,928 --> 01:17:31,263
Because when I get
down there this afternoon
with the SEAL team...
1103
01:17:31,297 --> 01:17:33,299
we'll need somethin'
to toast with
when it's all over.
1104
01:17:33,332 --> 01:17:34,867
All right, then.
1105
01:17:34,901 --> 01:17:36,002
We'll talk soon.
1106
01:17:36,035 --> 01:17:37,904
Aye, aye.
1107
01:18:08,267 --> 01:18:13,172
Major! Major! Hurry!
If you ever dare to intrude
upon my shower again,
1108
01:18:13,205 --> 01:18:16,108
I shall make sure
that your death
will be slow,
1109
01:18:16,142 --> 01:18:19,411
public and require at least
six separate coffins.
1110
01:18:19,445 --> 01:18:23,282
Do you understand?
1111
01:18:23,315 --> 01:18:27,486
Wait a minute.
Aren't you the one
I told to alert me...
1112
01:18:27,519 --> 01:18:30,522
when the time
was growing near,
1113
01:18:30,556 --> 01:18:33,325
so that I would not miss
the big moment?
1114
01:18:36,996 --> 01:18:40,099
Well, then.
1115
01:18:40,132 --> 01:18:43,135
I'm... sorry.
1116
01:18:43,169 --> 01:18:46,238
No problem.
1117
01:18:56,282 --> 01:18:58,017
Ladies and gentlemen,
now it's time...
1118
01:18:58,050 --> 01:19:01,854
to say good evening
to my old pal, Happy.
1119
01:19:01,888 --> 01:19:04,590
Yeah! Happy!
1120
01:19:04,623 --> 01:19:06,525
Happy, now I see
you're all dressed up.
1121
01:19:06,558 --> 01:19:09,161
Now, is this for the party
or for a court appearance?
A little lower.
1122
01:19:11,397 --> 01:19:13,032
How do you guys find a date?
1123
01:19:13,065 --> 01:19:14,566
"Mom, I wanna date
my sister."
1124
01:19:14,600 --> 01:19:18,104
No, but seriously,
1125
01:19:18,137 --> 01:19:20,639
you know, Happy,
I have a girlfriend.
McHale.
1126
01:19:20,672 --> 01:19:23,175
Hey, Carpenter.
What brings you here?
1127
01:19:23,209 --> 01:19:25,411
Well, I came to tell you
that I've come
to the conclusion...
1128
01:19:25,444 --> 01:19:27,379
that Binghampton
i an idiot.
1129
01:19:27,413 --> 01:19:29,882
But...
what are you doing?
1130
01:19:29,916 --> 01:19:31,550
Well, we're havin'
a "Save the World" party.
1131
01:19:31,583 --> 01:19:33,652
Come here.
1132
01:19:33,685 --> 01:19:37,189
How's it lookin', Willie?
Uh, just lockin' in now.
Wish me luck.
1133
01:19:37,223 --> 01:19:39,591
Wish you luck?
I'm the one who has
to get up there onstage.
1134
01:19:39,625 --> 01:19:41,460
How much time we got?
Ninety seconds.
1135
01:19:41,493 --> 01:19:43,896
Ninety seconds.
Wait right here.
1136
01:19:49,435 --> 01:19:53,305
How long?
Seventy-five seconds, sir.
1137
01:19:59,178 --> 01:20:02,248
Where's your dinghy, sailor?
Why, it's where
it always is, sir.
1138
01:20:02,281 --> 01:20:05,251
Is it hooked up
to the masthead?
No, that was just like---
1139
01:20:05,284 --> 01:20:07,653
McHale, what is going on?
1140
01:20:07,686 --> 01:20:09,655
Vladakov's trying to steal
satellite codes...
1141
01:20:09,688 --> 01:20:12,591
so he can launch
a missile that could kill
a lot of people.
1142
01:20:12,624 --> 01:20:14,660
Go on.
So we got all this stuff...
1143
01:20:14,693 --> 01:20:17,029
so we could jam his link
to the satellite.
1144
01:20:17,063 --> 01:20:20,332
Hopefully, this show
will be the only transmission
he receives.
1145
01:20:20,366 --> 01:20:24,036
But why the comedy club?
Why all this stuff?
Look at these people.
1146
01:20:24,070 --> 01:20:25,571
A few days ago,
they got their village
burned to the ground,
1147
01:20:25,604 --> 01:20:27,473
but they're here
laughin' their heads off.
1148
01:20:27,506 --> 01:20:30,042
That's what I love
about these guys--
their strength.
1149
01:20:30,076 --> 01:20:31,577
That's why I do my best
to protect 'em.
1150
01:20:31,610 --> 01:20:35,147
Uh, Skip?
It's time.
Okay.
1151
01:20:35,181 --> 01:20:38,117
Be right back.
1152
01:20:41,353 --> 01:20:44,256
Starting countdown
at 20,
1153
01:20:44,290 --> 01:20:48,427
19, 18, 17, 16--
1154
01:20:48,460 --> 01:20:53,065
15, 14, 13, 12, 11--
1155
01:20:57,436 --> 01:20:59,705
Six, five--
1156
01:20:59,738 --> 01:21:01,340
Four, three--
1157
01:21:03,775 --> 01:21:07,413
Now!
1158
01:21:07,446 --> 01:21:10,549
Buenos noches,
mujeres y caballeros!
1159
01:21:10,582 --> 01:21:14,120
And welcome to McHa-Ha-Hale's
Mambo Party!
What is this?
1160
01:21:14,153 --> 01:21:16,388
I'm not sure, sir.
1161
01:21:16,422 --> 01:21:18,457
*
1162
01:21:18,490 --> 01:21:23,029
So let's get the show
r-r-r-r-r-rolling!
1163
01:21:23,062 --> 01:21:26,165
Our first performer--
ya know him, ya love him.
1164
01:21:26,198 --> 01:21:29,135
He's the hardest-working
smuggler on the black market.
1165
01:21:29,168 --> 01:21:31,603
Give it up
for Quinton McHale!
1166
01:21:31,637 --> 01:21:34,740
*
1167
01:21:34,773 --> 01:21:36,742
*
Thank you, Ensign Parker.
1168
01:21:36,775 --> 01:21:39,145
It's good to see ya
back in men's clothing.
1169
01:21:39,178 --> 01:21:41,213
McHale!
1170
01:21:41,247 --> 01:21:43,449
I'm supposed
to tell you about our
drink special tonight--
1171
01:21:43,482 --> 01:21:45,451
"Stolen Vodka Surprise."
1172
01:21:45,484 --> 01:21:49,088
We stole Vladakov's vodka.
1173
01:21:51,090 --> 01:21:53,159
So this guy comes up to me
and he says, "You know,
you shouldn't smoke."
1174
01:21:53,192 --> 01:21:57,129
We are in a new era.
1175
01:21:57,163 --> 01:22:01,533
If we do not devise
some greater
and more equitable--
1176
01:22:01,567 --> 01:22:04,570
Anybody here from San Felipe?
1177
01:22:04,603 --> 01:22:06,305
Okay, come on.
You're embarrassing me.
1178
01:22:06,338 --> 01:22:08,274
And I've got
a very special guest
here tonight.
1179
01:22:08,307 --> 01:22:11,177
Let's show
a little respect for
Lieutenant Penelope Carpenter.
1180
01:22:11,210 --> 01:22:16,548
Now, let's give her a big
San Moreno welcome! Yes!
1181
01:22:16,582 --> 01:22:19,351
Yeah!
1182
01:22:19,385 --> 01:22:20,819
This guy goes to this
house of ill repute--
I'm sorry.
1183
01:22:20,852 --> 01:22:23,322
I-I don't know what
has happened.
1184
01:22:23,355 --> 01:22:25,691
I can't seem to stop
the transmission.
1185
01:22:25,724 --> 01:22:28,827
How is this possible?
You have to fix this!
1186
01:22:28,860 --> 01:22:30,829
This is horrible!
Oh, I don't know.
1187
01:22:30,862 --> 01:22:33,699
I thought the black guy
was pretty good.
1188
01:22:33,732 --> 01:22:36,502
I mean, compared
to the fat white guy.
1189
01:22:38,204 --> 01:22:40,572
You don't really want
to shoot me, do you?
1190
01:22:41,773 --> 01:22:44,276
Mm-mmm.
1191
01:22:44,310 --> 01:22:45,477
You!
1192
01:22:50,216 --> 01:22:53,085
Here. Your lunch.
1193
01:22:53,119 --> 01:22:54,820
Thank you.
1194
01:22:54,853 --> 01:22:56,488
No problem.
1195
01:22:58,257 --> 01:23:00,492
Oh, my God.
1196
01:23:00,526 --> 01:23:05,464
A completely unmotivated,
random killing.
1197
01:23:05,497 --> 01:23:08,567
All right, now I'd like
to introduce you
to the Amazing Christy.
1198
01:23:08,600 --> 01:23:11,570
It's amazing what he can do
with an I.Q. of 40.
1199
01:23:14,540 --> 01:23:17,409
What do you do for a living?
Are you an astronaut?
Hey. Let's talk.
1200
01:23:18,477 --> 01:23:20,212
Come on.
1201
01:23:22,181 --> 01:23:24,316
Knock it off, Virgil.
This is harder
than it looks.
1202
01:23:26,185 --> 01:23:28,620
Now I just gotta figure out
what Vladakov's really up to.
1203
01:23:28,654 --> 01:23:32,458
If he just wanted to steal
satellite codes, he wouldn't
go about it in this way.
1204
01:23:32,491 --> 01:23:34,460
He was a double agent
under Noriega,
1205
01:23:34,493 --> 01:23:36,595
and Cobra and I lost
the chance to put him away
for good
1206
01:23:36,628 --> 01:23:38,230
during the invasion.
1207
01:23:38,264 --> 01:23:41,500
Unfortunately, intelligence
underestimated the size
of Noriega's security force...
1208
01:23:41,533 --> 01:23:44,203
and didn't give you
enough backup.
1209
01:23:44,236 --> 01:23:46,838
Yeah.
1210
01:23:46,872 --> 01:23:49,441
on the Panama action
while I was at the Academy.
1211
01:23:49,475 --> 01:23:51,143
That's good.
Have a seat.
1212
01:23:53,212 --> 01:23:55,881
That's right. You were
the first female
through the Academy.
1213
01:23:55,914 --> 01:23:57,883
Yes, sir.
Boy, you put up
with a lot of crap.
1214
01:23:58,750 --> 01:24:00,586
True.
1215
01:24:00,619 --> 01:24:03,189
But I really didn't have
another option.
1216
01:24:03,222 --> 01:24:05,424
I love the navy.
1217
01:24:05,457 --> 01:24:08,160
Why'd you quit
the navy, Quinton?
1218
01:24:08,194 --> 01:24:10,696
Well, Penelope,
I quit the navy...
1219
01:24:10,729 --> 01:24:12,831
'cause I got tired
of comin' home
from missions...
1220
01:24:12,864 --> 01:24:15,434
and havin'
another Binghampton
waitin' to give me orders.
1221
01:24:15,467 --> 01:24:18,604
Have I mentioned
I don't like that guy?
Yes, which is why I came.
1222
01:24:18,637 --> 01:24:22,474
He is really itching
to go after Vladakov himself.
That figures.
1223
01:24:22,508 --> 01:24:27,913
Guys like Binghampton are
always willing to get men
killed for their own egos.
1224
01:24:27,946 --> 01:24:31,583
I had a man in my unit--
Robert Valenzuela--
who was from here.
1225
01:24:31,617 --> 01:24:34,453
Bravest man
I ever worked with.
1226
01:24:34,486 --> 01:24:37,323
Vladakov killed him
down in Panama.
1227
01:24:37,356 --> 01:24:40,592
I bet that wasn't
in your thesis.
I'm so sorry.
1228
01:24:40,626 --> 01:24:42,894
Yeah, I'm sorry too.
1229
01:24:42,928 --> 01:24:46,365
The navy wouldn't
acknowledge our mission,
so his family got nothing.
1230
01:24:46,398 --> 01:24:50,469
So I decided that I would
take care of his son
and his family.
1231
01:24:50,502 --> 01:24:53,839
Little did I know he was
related to every single
person on this island.
1232
01:24:53,872 --> 01:24:56,375
But that's
what I do now,
and I like it.
1233
01:25:02,381 --> 01:25:03,982
I-I should really go check
on Binghampton.
1234
01:25:04,015 --> 01:25:06,252
I-I'll let you know.
Yeah.
1235
01:25:06,285 --> 01:25:07,853
Do that.
Okay.
1236
01:25:07,886 --> 01:25:10,689
Drive safe.
1237
01:25:17,496 --> 01:25:21,533
Speed is the essence of war.
1238
01:25:21,567 --> 01:25:24,002
Take advantage
of the enemy's unpreparedness,
1239
01:25:24,035 --> 01:25:26,838
travel by unexpected routes,
1240
01:25:26,872 --> 01:25:30,876
and strike the enemy
where he has taken
n precaution!
1241
01:25:32,544 --> 01:25:34,846
Fall out!
Hit the boat!
1242
01:25:42,020 --> 01:25:44,323
Sir, what
are you doing?
1243
01:25:44,356 --> 01:25:46,658
This is my moment
of destiny, Carpenter.
1244
01:25:46,692 --> 01:25:49,495
This is not
your mission, sir.
It is McHale's.
1245
01:25:49,528 --> 01:25:51,497
I'm going to have
to notify him.
1246
01:25:51,530 --> 01:25:53,599
This is an invasion,
Lieutenant.
1247
01:25:53,632 --> 01:25:57,469
No communications get off
this base except through me.
Understood?
1248
01:25:57,503 --> 01:25:59,605
Why are you
doing this, sir?
1249
01:25:59,638 --> 01:26:01,740
Listen to me, Carpenter.
1250
01:26:01,773 --> 01:26:05,377
Cobra's going to retire soon.
They'll be looking for someone
to replace him.
1251
01:26:05,411 --> 01:26:09,848
Let's just say
that Wallace B. Binghampton
is about to submit his résumé.
1252
01:26:09,881 --> 01:26:12,351
Sir?
1253
01:26:12,384 --> 01:26:16,455
Respectfully...
you're nuts.
1254
01:26:16,488 --> 01:26:21,660
The navy has a word
for officers like you:
"prisoner."
1255
01:26:21,693 --> 01:26:24,596
S.P., the lieutenant
is confined to the brig.
1256
01:26:24,630 --> 01:26:26,332
Escort her there
immediately.
1257
01:26:26,365 --> 01:26:28,634
Aye, aye, sir.
Lieutenant?
1258
01:26:33,038 --> 01:26:36,342
See you on CNN, Carpenter.
1259
01:26:36,375 --> 01:26:40,412
I'm really sorry about this,
Lieutenant.
Aw, don't worry about it.
1260
01:26:40,446 --> 01:26:44,350
Look, you don't happen to have
a steel plate in your head
or anything, do you?
1261
01:26:44,383 --> 01:26:46,952
No.
Good.
1262
01:26:50,088 --> 01:26:52,658
Sorry about that.
1263
01:26:52,691 --> 01:26:55,327
Major, I hope
this is good news.
1264
01:26:55,361 --> 01:26:57,062
The logistics involved
in getting three men...
1265
01:26:57,095 --> 01:27:00,732
of such different temperaments
together is just--
Forget that!
1266
01:27:00,766 --> 01:27:03,769
We are all here.
What is it you want?
1267
01:27:03,802 --> 01:27:05,604
Gentlemen,
1268
01:27:05,637 --> 01:27:08,807
I am proud to report
that the missile
is on its way.
1269
01:27:08,840 --> 01:27:09,908
Excellent!
1270
01:27:09,941 --> 01:27:11,009
Very good.
1271
01:27:11,042 --> 01:27:11,910
Congratulations.
1272
01:27:11,943 --> 01:27:13,479
Well, thank you.
1273
01:27:13,512 --> 01:27:15,414
I think this will go
a long way
1274
01:27:15,447 --> 01:27:17,483
in making you the number one
terrorist in the world.
1275
01:27:17,516 --> 01:27:19,418
Oh, you think so?
1276
01:27:19,451 --> 01:27:20,919
Absolutely.
1277
01:27:20,952 --> 01:27:22,554
When can we celebrate?
1278
01:27:23,989 --> 01:27:27,626
In, uh,
just about ten seconds.
1279
01:27:27,659 --> 01:27:30,862
But first, I have
just one question:
1280
01:27:30,896 --> 01:27:33,699
do you happen to know
if your check has cleared?
1281
01:27:35,434 --> 01:27:38,737
Definitely!
I guarantee it.
1282
01:27:38,770 --> 01:27:41,873
Well, then,
let's celebrate now.
1283
01:27:41,907 --> 01:27:44,009
Hmm.
All right.
1284
01:27:44,042 --> 01:27:46,378
To the new world order.
New world order.
1285
01:27:46,412 --> 01:27:50,015
To no world order.
1286
01:27:50,048 --> 01:27:51,950
Hmm?
1287
01:27:51,983 --> 01:27:54,052
What's that?
1288
01:27:57,589 --> 01:27:59,791
Don't judge me, David.
1289
01:27:59,825 --> 01:28:02,428
You're hindering
my spiritual growth.
1290
01:28:02,461 --> 01:28:04,896
Clear!
1291
01:28:04,930 --> 01:28:08,033
Get that line!
Up the port side.
1292
01:28:08,066 --> 01:28:11,637
Bitchin'. You guys did
a heck of a job on this boat.
1293
01:28:11,670 --> 01:28:13,739
Thanks.
Looks great.
1294
01:28:13,772 --> 01:28:15,173
Uh-oh. Look at that.
1295
01:28:17,776 --> 01:28:20,779
Three days ago,
she wouldn't talk to me.
Now I can't get rid of her.
1296
01:28:20,812 --> 01:28:23,749
Quint, Binghampton's
going after Vladakov.
1297
01:28:23,782 --> 01:28:27,018
We better get over there, men.
Gear up.
But the boat's not ready.
1298
01:28:27,052 --> 01:28:29,688
Then you better
make it ready, mister.
Come on.
1299
01:28:36,094 --> 01:28:37,763
Sir?
What?
1300
01:28:37,796 --> 01:28:41,600
The compound
is over here.
Oh.
1301
01:28:47,138 --> 01:28:49,207
Looks like nobody's around.
1302
01:28:49,240 --> 01:28:53,512
This is really weird.
Well, obviously,
the little cowards are hiding.
1303
01:28:53,545 --> 01:28:56,014
I'll just have
to flush them out.
Uh, sir--
1304
01:28:56,047 --> 01:28:59,451
[ Flare Hissing,
Whistling ]
1305
01:29:00,952 --> 01:29:02,754
That should get
their attention.
1306
01:29:27,946 --> 01:29:29,915
Oops.
1307
01:29:32,718 --> 01:29:35,086
I don't suppose
that's Binghampton.
1308
01:29:38,223 --> 01:29:40,091
Spread out!
Aye, aye, sir!
1309
01:29:56,007 --> 01:29:58,510
It, uh, looks like
the mission
is accomplished, sir.
1310
01:29:58,544 --> 01:30:01,547
Damn right.
Binghampton.
1311
01:30:01,580 --> 01:30:04,850
What's goin' on?
Well, look here.
The great McHale arrives...
1312
01:30:04,883 --> 01:30:07,653
afte the battle is over.
1313
01:30:07,686 --> 01:30:09,655
And who's with him?
Penelope Carpenter...
1314
01:30:09,688 --> 01:30:12,924
the former promising
lieutenant turned
P.T. groupie.
1315
01:30:12,958 --> 01:30:15,193
What happened here?
It's obvious.
1316
01:30:15,226 --> 01:30:17,729
I stormed,
and I conquered.
1317
01:30:17,763 --> 01:30:21,166
And when Cobra arrives,
he'll see who stepped in
to clean up your mess.
1318
01:30:21,199 --> 01:30:22,768
Cobra's coming down here?
1319
01:30:22,801 --> 01:30:24,903
Yes, and I intend to give him
an earful...
1320
01:30:24,936 --> 01:30:28,039
about your recent
indiscretions.
1321
01:30:28,073 --> 01:30:33,044
McHale, this whole base
was wired to blow up.
Ah, Parker. Another traitor.
1322
01:30:33,078 --> 01:30:34,179
Now, listen to me, McHale.
1323
01:30:34,212 --> 01:30:35,781
There's no way
you're gonna take
1324
01:30:35,814 --> 01:30:38,049
this great victory
away from me.
1325
01:30:38,083 --> 01:30:40,819
Now, I'm going to go
and get ready to greet Cobra.
1326
01:30:40,852 --> 01:30:43,789
Come on, men.
1327
01:30:43,822 --> 01:30:46,191
Hey, Skip. Looks like
there's nobody here.
1328
01:30:46,224 --> 01:30:49,094
Hey, guys.
1329
01:30:49,127 --> 01:30:51,062
Look what I found.
1330
01:30:51,096 --> 01:30:53,799
Vladakov's shrink.
Doctor.
1331
01:30:53,832 --> 01:30:55,133
Where's Vladakov?
1332
01:30:59,237 --> 01:31:03,942
He shot me!
After all my years of service
listening to his complexes.
1333
01:31:03,975 --> 01:31:07,212
I opened my heart to him
and look what I get for it!
1334
01:31:07,245 --> 01:31:09,347
Where are Vladakov's men?
1335
01:31:09,380 --> 01:31:12,718
Ah. They all resigned.
1336
01:31:12,751 --> 01:31:14,319
This makes absolutely
no sense at all.
1337
01:31:14,352 --> 01:31:17,055
Why set up all this
and then not put up
a fight?
1338
01:31:17,088 --> 01:31:19,090
Hey, Skip.
1339
01:31:19,124 --> 01:31:20,992
Take a look at this.
1340
01:31:24,362 --> 01:31:29,067
San Ysidro, this is Cobra One
moving on final approach
in 20 minutes.
1341
01:31:29,100 --> 01:31:31,202
That's affirmative,
Cobra One. San Ysidro out.
1342
01:31:31,236 --> 01:31:33,071
Where did they tap
into our vid
1343
01:31:33,104 --> 01:31:35,340
By the look of all this stuff,
they've had it the whole time.
1344
01:31:35,373 --> 01:31:39,377
Ahoy, McHale.
Sorry I couldn't be there
to enjoy my fireworks,
1345
01:31:39,410 --> 01:31:43,782
but I've been planning
a surprise party
for our good buddy Cobra.
1346
01:31:43,815 --> 01:31:46,785
Sorry.
You are not invited.
1347
01:31:46,818 --> 01:31:49,087
He set us up!
Why would he have
something against Cobra?
1348
01:31:49,120 --> 01:31:51,389
I don't know.
We trained together.
Cobra never cut him any slack.
1349
01:31:51,422 --> 01:31:54,059
But he's not crazy enough
to go to all this trouble
for that, is he?
1350
01:31:54,092 --> 01:31:56,662
Oh, do you really
have to ask?
We've gotta find Cobra.
1351
01:31:56,695 --> 01:31:59,330
Let's get
to the boat, men.
1352
01:31:59,364 --> 01:32:01,833
Oh, yes. Yes!
1353
01:32:13,378 --> 01:32:15,781
How long before we land?
1354
01:32:16,982 --> 01:32:18,784
About 20 minutes, sir.
1355
01:32:28,827 --> 01:32:30,261
You guys see anything
out there?
1356
01:32:30,295 --> 01:32:31,863
Nothin' in this
direction, Skip.
1357
01:32:31,897 --> 01:32:33,631
Got 'em!
Straight ahead.
1358
01:32:35,300 --> 01:32:37,302
All right, guys.
Get ready for anything.
1359
01:32:48,113 --> 01:32:50,215
Full speed ahead, Jose.
1360
01:32:50,248 --> 01:32:52,650
Right!
1361
01:33:20,245 --> 01:33:23,281
Now we are starting
to boogie!
1362
01:33:36,261 --> 01:33:38,296
Hello, boy!
1363
01:33:44,269 --> 01:33:46,938
A P.T. boat?
1364
01:33:46,972 --> 01:33:48,807
There must be a crack
in the Bermuda Triangle.
1365
01:33:48,840 --> 01:33:50,208
What?
1366
01:33:50,241 --> 01:33:51,743
Uh, n-nothing, sir.
1367
01:34:01,052 --> 01:34:03,321
There's Vladakov!
1368
01:34:05,123 --> 01:34:07,458
Ah, McHale.
1369
01:34:08,426 --> 01:34:10,395
Sit!
1370
01:34:10,428 --> 01:34:12,730
There's a good dog.
1371
01:34:18,169 --> 01:34:21,272
Get ready, boys.
1372
01:34:21,306 --> 01:34:23,875
So, you want to play
"Chicken," huh?
1373
01:34:35,420 --> 01:34:37,322
[ Machine Gun Fire
Continues ]
1374
01:34:42,327 --> 01:34:45,163
Hold on!
1375
01:35:13,291 --> 01:35:16,161
Hang on!
Hang on!
1376
01:35:21,266 --> 01:35:23,534
Jose, kick in that nitrous!
1377
01:35:23,568 --> 01:35:26,404
Coming right up!
1378
01:35:33,544 --> 01:35:36,181
Virgil, let him know
we're here.
1379
01:35:37,448 --> 01:35:39,484
Aye, aye, Skip.
1380
01:35:42,888 --> 01:35:47,425
McHale, I have someone here
who wants to speak to you.
1381
01:35:47,458 --> 01:35:49,527
Say, "Hey, buddy."
1382
01:35:49,560 --> 01:35:50,996
McHale!
1383
01:35:51,029 --> 01:35:53,431
Recognize the voice?
Hold your fire!
1384
01:35:55,200 --> 01:35:57,936
He's got Roberto!
1385
01:36:04,209 --> 01:36:05,610
Whoa. Incoming!
1386
01:36:06,411 --> 01:36:08,446
Hit the deck!
1387
01:36:16,454 --> 01:36:19,157
Whoo! Yeah!
Whoo!
1388
01:36:19,190 --> 01:36:20,458
What was that?
1389
01:36:20,491 --> 01:36:22,260
I think it was
an explosion, sir.
1390
01:36:22,293 --> 01:36:24,129
Let's go back and take a look.
1391
01:36:24,162 --> 01:36:25,630
Okay, sir.
1392
01:36:31,970 --> 01:36:35,106
Nice shot, Carpenter.
Thanks.
1393
01:36:35,140 --> 01:36:36,975
More power, Jose.
Let's go.
1394
01:36:37,008 --> 01:36:38,176
You got it.
1395
01:36:50,055 --> 01:36:53,091
McHale, look!
1396
01:36:54,425 --> 01:36:57,028
Good job, kid.
I'll get him, Skip.
1397
01:36:57,062 --> 01:36:58,463
Thanks, Parker.
1398
01:36:58,496 --> 01:37:00,298
Eeeyaah!
1399
01:37:04,569 --> 01:37:07,405
I'm comin',
buddy boy.
1400
01:37:07,438 --> 01:37:09,440
Just relax.
Kick your feet.
1401
01:37:15,313 --> 01:37:17,448
What is that?
1402
01:37:24,155 --> 01:37:26,057
Let him have it!
1403
01:37:36,167 --> 01:37:38,403
Oh, my God!
1404
01:37:38,436 --> 01:37:41,106
Hey!
1405
01:37:41,739 --> 01:37:43,408
Jose, we need more power!
1406
01:37:43,441 --> 01:37:45,376
I'm givin' her all she's got!
1407
01:37:49,714 --> 01:37:54,052
Is he still there?
I don't know.
He's not on the radar, sir.
1408
01:37:57,188 --> 01:38:00,258
Firing torpedo number one!
No, Skip!
Not that one!
1409
01:38:03,361 --> 01:38:05,663
Sorry, Skip.
I got a good deal
on 'em in Havana.
1410
01:38:05,696 --> 01:38:07,598
You ever hear of a humidor,
knucklehead?
1411
01:38:16,307 --> 01:38:19,377
We're hit! We're hit!
All right, take her down
for a landing!
1412
01:38:33,358 --> 01:38:36,361
Firing torpedo number two!
1413
01:38:42,733 --> 01:38:45,036
Hey, Vlady.
How's your hemorrhoids?
1414
01:38:45,770 --> 01:38:49,307
Huh?
1415
01:38:58,183 --> 01:39:00,085
This is for Panama.
1416
01:39:02,853 --> 01:39:05,356
What a dick!
1417
01:39:18,403 --> 01:39:22,540
Yeah! Whoa!
Aaah!
1418
01:39:22,573 --> 01:39:26,177
Great job, guys.
Now let's go pick up Cobra.
1419
01:39:39,757 --> 01:39:42,427
Let's go!
Everybody out!
Let's go, men!
1420
01:39:42,460 --> 01:39:45,163
Right down on the beach!
Go ahead!
1421
01:39:45,196 --> 01:39:47,532
Watch out for that propeller.
Let's go!
1422
01:39:55,806 --> 01:39:58,843
Thanks a lot,
little buddy.
No problem.
1423
01:39:58,876 --> 01:40:03,714
You know, I totally forgot
about that inner-ear thing.
1424
01:40:03,748 --> 01:40:07,585
Hey! My whistle.
1425
01:40:10,188 --> 01:40:11,856
And it still works too.
1426
01:40:24,369 --> 01:40:27,572
Congratulations, young man.
1427
01:40:27,605 --> 01:40:30,641
Yes, congratulations
are in order.
1428
01:40:30,675 --> 01:40:32,877
You men deserve these medals
'cause you earned them!
1429
01:40:34,245 --> 01:40:36,614
I'm proud of you.
1430
01:40:36,647 --> 01:40:40,585
The navy is proud of you.
God bless you all.
1431
01:40:40,618 --> 01:40:42,187
Thank you, sir.
Thank you, sir.
1432
01:40:42,220 --> 01:40:43,788
Right-hand salute.
1433
01:40:45,523 --> 01:40:48,426
Thank you, gentlemen.
1434
01:40:48,459 --> 01:40:51,229
Lieutenant Commander
Carpenter.
1435
01:40:51,262 --> 01:40:53,498
Congratulations.
1436
01:40:54,665 --> 01:40:58,703
Uh-- Uh--
1437
01:40:58,736 --> 01:41:01,339
I never could pin
one of these things
on a woman.
1438
01:41:01,372 --> 01:41:03,874
Uh, hold out your hand,
young lady.
1439
01:41:03,908 --> 01:41:07,512
Thank you very much.
1440
01:41:07,545 --> 01:41:10,815
Thank you.
1441
01:41:12,550 --> 01:41:17,855
I would like to present
this commendation...
1442
01:41:17,888 --> 01:41:20,858
and this medal
for bravery...
1443
01:41:20,891 --> 01:41:24,795
to the navy's
newest lieutenant,
Charles T. Parker.
1444
01:41:24,829 --> 01:41:27,698
You, sir, embody the spirit
and dedication...
1445
01:41:27,732 --> 01:41:30,435
that is in accordance
with the highest
navy traditions.
1446
01:41:30,468 --> 01:41:33,438
Thank you, sir.
1447
01:41:33,471 --> 01:41:36,841
I guess I'd like to
thank, uh, the Academy--
the Naval Academy--
1448
01:41:36,874 --> 01:41:38,976
I'm just kiddin'.
1449
01:41:39,009 --> 01:41:41,446
Quinton, thanks
for the save.
1450
01:41:41,479 --> 01:41:44,449
I want you to accept
this medal and this
brand-new ball field...
1451
01:41:44,482 --> 01:41:48,553
as a token of appreciation
from the navy
for all your hard work.
1452
01:41:49,654 --> 01:41:52,590
Thank you, Admiral.
What?
1453
01:41:52,623 --> 01:41:55,860
Thanks, Dad.
1454
01:41:58,496 --> 01:42:01,899
Hey, how's my old boat
runnin'?
Well, it's old, but it can
still kick a little ass.
1455
01:42:01,932 --> 01:42:04,535
Yeah!
1456
01:42:04,569 --> 01:42:06,604
Words from that
old Negro spiritual--
1457
01:42:06,637 --> 01:42:08,706
That's enough, son.
1458
01:42:08,739 --> 01:42:13,311
And now, Roberto Valenzuela
would like to make
a special presentation.
1459
01:42:19,884 --> 01:42:22,987
McHale?
1460
01:42:23,020 --> 01:42:27,592
McHale, on behalf
of the people
from San Moreno,
1461
01:42:27,625 --> 01:42:30,361
we would like to thank you
for saving our island.
1462
01:42:30,395 --> 01:42:33,531
To show our appreciation,
we would like to give you
a little gift.
1463
01:42:44,309 --> 01:42:48,346
Wow! It looks good.
Sounds good too.
1464
01:42:48,379 --> 01:42:51,549
I guess I won't have to
fiddle with it this time.
Whoo!
1465
01:42:56,086 --> 01:42:59,324
How about a ride,
Penelope?
1466
01:42:59,357 --> 01:43:01,559
You know the navy's rules
about fraternization
between officers.
1467
01:43:02,927 --> 01:43:05,463
Well... looks like
I'm retired again.
1468
01:43:08,533 --> 01:43:10,535
Whoo!
1469
01:43:10,568 --> 01:43:13,471
Whoo, yeah!
1470
01:43:13,504 --> 01:43:15,806
Hey, ump.
Let's get the game started.
1471
01:43:17,975 --> 01:43:19,944
Uh, yes. Right away.
1472
01:43:19,977 --> 01:43:23,348
And, McHale?
1473
01:43:23,381 --> 01:43:25,750
Congratulations.
You too, Carpenter.
1474
01:43:25,783 --> 01:43:28,419
Good... job.
Yeah, it was, wasn't it?
1475
01:43:36,894 --> 01:43:38,696
Play ball!
1476
01:43:41,766 --> 01:43:43,801
Whoo!
Yeah!
1477
01:43:46,537 --> 01:43:49,474
Kids.
Whoo-hoo-hoo.
1478
01:43:49,507 --> 01:43:52,543
Hey, Dad!
Don't wait up for me!
1479
01:43:53,411 --> 01:43:55,513
Whoo!
105777
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