All language subtitles for Tiny.Cinema.2022.1080p.WEB-DL.DD5.1.H.264-EVO~
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Filipino
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hindi
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Igbo
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kannada
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Malayalam
Maltese
Maori
Marathi
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese
Punjabi
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Sundanese
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Telugu
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Xhosa
Yiddish
Yoruba
Zulu
Odia (Oriya)
Kinyarwanda
Turkmen
Tatar
Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:18,145 --> 00:01:20,080
I know what you're thinking.
2
00:01:20,213 --> 00:01:23,150
Pretty weird choice
for a host, huh?
3
00:01:23,283 --> 00:01:28,388
Who better than a sneaky little bad
boy rolling around town such as myself?
4
00:01:28,523 --> 00:01:30,758
Let me straight up with you.
5
00:01:30,892 --> 00:01:33,828
This is the kind of place it's going
to make you feel uncomfortable.
6
00:01:33,962 --> 00:01:36,030
I can promise you that.
7
00:01:36,163 --> 00:01:37,665
You may laugh.
8
00:01:37,932 --> 00:01:39,734
You may get offended.
9
00:01:39,867 --> 00:01:41,002
Don't worry,
10
00:01:41,134 --> 00:01:43,671
that's the whole fucking point.
11
00:01:43,805 --> 00:01:47,307
You see here we don't
believe in dreams.
12
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:49,777
We live in nightmares.
13
00:01:50,210 --> 00:01:51,846
Still don't get it yet,
14
00:01:51,980 --> 00:01:53,180
do ya?
15
00:01:54,082 --> 00:01:55,683
Speaking of not
getting it to the
16
00:01:55,817 --> 00:01:58,920
right of me is the
Thompsons residence.
17
00:01:59,053 --> 00:02:04,124
On the surface, Thompson seems like
your everyday all American young couple.
18
00:02:04,257 --> 00:02:06,894
But tonight that's
going to change.
19
00:02:07,028 --> 00:02:08,096
For tonight...
20
00:02:08,228 --> 00:02:09,731
Is game night.
21
00:02:24,879 --> 00:02:26,146
Uh oh.
22
00:02:26,346 --> 00:02:29,216
Who invited these guys,
come on guys welcome in!
23
00:02:29,349 --> 00:02:30,785
Good to see you,
good to see you!
24
00:02:30,918 --> 00:02:32,787
We got wine and
stuff girls, IPA for the
25
00:02:32,920 --> 00:02:34,722
big man, and we
got a bunch of chips.
26
00:02:36,724 --> 00:02:38,401
Basically used to be,
but I don't remember being.
27
00:02:38,425 --> 00:02:40,394
I don't ever and I've
seen any man.
28
00:02:40,528 --> 00:02:41,863
Well I can't do the math.
29
00:02:41,996 --> 00:02:43,931
- I can't do the trick.
- I have the magic.
30
00:03:07,789 --> 00:03:09,590
Uh oh. My turn?
31
00:03:09,724 --> 00:03:11,959
Right hand blue.
- Blue.
32
00:03:12,593 --> 00:03:15,630
Alright brace for impact guys
I'm bending over for this one, so...
33
00:03:16,898 --> 00:03:17,999
That's what she said.
34
00:03:21,268 --> 00:03:22,302
Who's she?
35
00:03:26,507 --> 00:03:28,943
That's funny.
36
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:31,779
Who is she?
37
00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:39,286
Are you serious?
38
00:03:41,354 --> 00:03:42,724
No.
39
00:03:55,103 --> 00:03:56,537
Left hand red.
40
00:04:14,222 --> 00:04:17,424
- Goodnight guys!
- What are you talking about?
41
00:04:17,558 --> 00:04:19,594
- Have a good night.
- Thank you guys.
42
00:04:19,727 --> 00:04:21,062
Good night!
- Bye!
43
00:04:21,195 --> 00:04:24,165
Yeah great, thanks for coming.
44
00:04:24,632 --> 00:04:26,134
You OK?
- Yeah.
45
00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,502
Okay.
46
00:04:35,877 --> 00:04:37,444
That's what he said.
47
00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:40,748
Who is she?
48
00:04:40,882 --> 00:04:43,050
She.
49
00:05:20,721 --> 00:05:22,690
OK, so I saw those curtains
on Way fair,
50
00:05:22,824 --> 00:05:25,593
the uhm, the space curtains.
51
00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:27,195
It sounds ugly but it's not.
52
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:29,263
It's really cute
53
00:05:29,396 --> 00:05:31,208
so I'm
thinking the space curtains in the
54
00:05:31,232 --> 00:05:34,068
bedroom and then we move
the bedroom curtains into
55
00:05:34,202 --> 00:05:37,337
the other rooms and nobody
ever has to see it again.
56
00:05:37,470 --> 00:05:38,573
It's disgusting.
57
00:05:38,706 --> 00:05:40,074
Then we can move...
58
00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:46,479
Yeah, once we do that then.
59
00:05:52,987 --> 00:05:55,957
You know what I mean?
60
00:05:57,091 --> 00:05:59,193
Anyway, yeah, so I think
you could do that...
61
00:06:28,522 --> 00:06:30,691
Who is she?
62
00:06:58,686 --> 00:07:00,721
Hey honey.
63
00:07:00,855 --> 00:07:01,889
Uhm...
64
00:07:02,455 --> 00:07:04,692
What's going on here?
65
00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:12,767
OK, because you know it's one
thing if you can't do the dishes,
66
00:07:12,900 --> 00:07:18,438
but it looks like you're
peeing in jars so...
67
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:22,109
Dishes...
68
00:07:23,177 --> 00:07:24,477
Oh, the dishes...
69
00:07:24,612 --> 00:07:26,547
Yeah, the dishes.
70
00:07:27,048 --> 00:07:28,816
It's what I said.
71
00:07:32,153 --> 00:07:33,187
What?
72
00:07:33,654 --> 00:07:36,456
Did you shit on the fridge?
73
00:07:39,694 --> 00:07:41,829
That's what you said.
74
00:07:45,166 --> 00:07:46,834
Excuse me.
75
00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:48,936
You said?
76
00:07:49,904 --> 00:07:51,205
Honey.
77
00:07:52,106 --> 00:07:54,508
Do you have any idea
what I've been through?
78
00:07:56,077 --> 00:07:59,547
You know how hard things have
been for me?
79
00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:03,317
Oh my God.
- I've been having some ideas.
80
00:08:03,451 --> 00:08:05,886
Floating around in my head.
81
00:08:06,020 --> 00:08:09,156
Trying to figure out who she is.
82
00:08:09,290 --> 00:08:11,625
Who's she?
83
00:08:12,259 --> 00:08:13,828
There you are.
84
00:08:14,528 --> 00:08:15,896
You...
85
00:08:16,664 --> 00:08:18,899
that's what you said.
86
00:08:19,900 --> 00:08:21,769
It's what you said.
87
00:08:22,370 --> 00:08:26,273
That's what you said, honey.
That's what you said...
88
00:08:26,407 --> 00:08:28,919
- I don't know what you're talking about...
- That's what you said!
89
00:08:28,943 --> 00:08:31,312
That's what you said.
90
00:08:31,445 --> 00:08:33,914
Okay stop, please, stop okay.
91
00:08:34,048 --> 00:08:38,486
Just just breathe
okay let's just breathe.
92
00:08:38,652 --> 00:08:40,021
OK.
93
00:08:40,488 --> 00:08:42,723
Honey look at yourself.
94
00:08:42,990 --> 00:08:45,693
What are you talking about?
95
00:08:45,893 --> 00:08:49,130
I'm sorry I don't know
what I did.
96
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,032
I didn't mean to do anything.
97
00:08:51,165 --> 00:08:52,299
I'm so sorry,
98
00:08:53,134 --> 00:08:54,535
Okay?
99
00:08:56,537 --> 00:08:59,508
I just want my husband back.
100
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:01,375
Can I have him back?
101
00:09:02,343 --> 00:09:05,212
Can I just have my normal
husband back OK?
102
00:09:05,346 --> 00:09:06,847
You're right.
103
00:09:08,749 --> 00:09:09,749
I'm so sorry.
104
00:09:09,784 --> 00:09:11,285
It's okay...
105
00:09:15,122 --> 00:09:16,757
Well, I've been acting weird.
106
00:09:18,726 --> 00:09:20,161
I've been, uh,
107
00:09:20,628 --> 00:09:22,730
acting strange so...
108
00:09:24,732 --> 00:09:26,033
It's embarrassing.
109
00:09:26,167 --> 00:09:27,201
Uh.
110
00:09:28,069 --> 00:09:29,070
All right.
111
00:09:29,336 --> 00:09:34,041
Mid life crisis alert, I'm gonna
do the dishes.
112
00:09:36,143 --> 00:09:37,912
Sorry about that.
113
00:09:38,513 --> 00:09:40,014
Uh.
114
00:09:40,549 --> 00:09:41,849
Don't know what that was so...
115
00:09:43,417 --> 00:09:44,752
Let me just...
116
00:09:55,663 --> 00:09:58,699
No. No honey,
there is one thing.
117
00:09:58,866 --> 00:10:00,835
About the dishes.
118
00:10:04,539 --> 00:10:06,273
I could use a hand.
119
00:10:14,048 --> 00:10:16,050
- Get it in the hole!
- Help me!
120
00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:17,586
- Please!
- Get in the hole!
121
00:10:17,718 --> 00:10:19,253
Just get it in the hole!
122
00:10:19,386 --> 00:10:23,558
Squeal like a pig baby!
Scream like a freaking baby!
123
00:10:23,691 --> 00:10:25,259
Fucking baby!
124
00:10:30,664 --> 00:10:31,744
It's game night.
125
00:10:37,606 --> 00:10:39,039
She has a fan.
126
00:10:40,474 --> 00:10:41,543
No.
127
00:11:03,898 --> 00:11:06,000
I am she.
128
00:11:07,536 --> 00:11:09,904
Oh my God,
129
00:11:10,639 --> 00:11:14,375
I'm so sorry you guys...
130
00:11:14,842 --> 00:11:16,210
What are you doing bud?
131
00:11:16,343 --> 00:11:18,679
I am her, she is me.
132
00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:20,814
I am always she.
133
00:11:21,382 --> 00:11:23,717
Call 911?
134
00:11:24,185 --> 00:11:25,252
Please.
135
00:11:27,821 --> 00:11:29,056
Okay...
136
00:11:44,038 --> 00:11:46,740
It's OK, honey,
we're right behind you, OK?
137
00:11:58,319 --> 00:11:59,621
Alright.
138
00:12:00,154 --> 00:12:02,823
Your wife's pretty cute man.
139
00:12:02,957 --> 00:12:04,225
Gonna have to get you better,
140
00:12:04,358 --> 00:12:06,293
or I'm going to steal
her from you.
141
00:12:06,427 --> 00:12:08,362
Heart rate is dropping
seems to be leveling out.
142
00:12:08,495 --> 00:12:12,199
Sir, can you hear us?
143
00:12:12,534 --> 00:12:15,202
Sir, nod if you can hear us, OK.
144
00:12:15,436 --> 00:12:17,706
Looks like someone's
coming back to reality.
145
00:12:17,838 --> 00:12:22,176
You're gonna feel a little pinch
here on the count of three, OK?
146
00:12:22,309 --> 00:12:23,978
1... 2... 3...
147
00:12:24,111 --> 00:12:27,915
It's gonna make you feel
a lot better.
148
00:12:28,315 --> 00:12:29,817
How's that feel?
149
00:12:29,984 --> 00:12:31,218
It feel...
150
00:12:31,385 --> 00:12:32,687
It feels good.
151
00:12:32,953 --> 00:12:34,188
I feel good.
152
00:12:37,726 --> 00:12:39,927
That's what she said.
153
00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:43,764
We're coming in with a male
unknown-
154
00:12:47,001 --> 00:12:49,303
That doesn't sound good.
155
00:12:49,704 --> 00:12:54,375
See that's why I gotta stop
taking these night shifts.
156
00:12:54,509 --> 00:12:55,809
I can tell you.
157
00:12:56,176 --> 00:13:00,114
Nothing good ever happens
after 10:00 PM.
158
00:13:00,247 --> 00:13:01,248
Anyways.
159
00:13:01,782 --> 00:13:03,083
I'm hungry.
160
00:13:09,758 --> 00:13:11,925
This is Edna.
161
00:13:14,395 --> 00:13:19,466
She's full of dreams and ideas
that never came to be.
162
00:13:20,801 --> 00:13:23,037
She spends most nights
here crying alone
163
00:13:23,170 --> 00:13:25,306
in this dusty kitchen.
164
00:13:25,640 --> 00:13:30,077
Revisiting the better times
of her memory.
165
00:13:31,312 --> 00:13:34,281
Pretty depressing stuff, huh?
166
00:13:34,549 --> 00:13:37,851
The only clear and constant
thought that crosses her mind.
167
00:13:37,985 --> 00:13:40,954
Is if she only had a man
to get through life with,
168
00:13:41,088 --> 00:13:42,856
maybe things will get better
169
00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:45,859
but only had a man
to get through life with.
170
00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:49,029
Maybe things will get better.
171
00:13:51,932 --> 00:13:54,101
Trip to Aspen this year
was amazing.
172
00:13:54,234 --> 00:13:56,136
So incredible yeah,
we stayed at the scene.
173
00:13:56,270 --> 00:13:58,773
Yeah.
- Oh my God I love it.
174
00:13:58,906 --> 00:14:00,307
It was so nice.
175
00:14:04,378 --> 00:14:07,414
Yeah no but the spa's
way better.
176
00:14:07,782 --> 00:14:11,118
It's way better. And Stephen
took his clients there last year...
177
00:14:26,534 --> 00:14:30,672
She didn't want to be
here anymore.
178
00:14:31,372 --> 00:14:33,474
So she chose a bridge.
179
00:14:35,777 --> 00:14:38,680
She listened for a voice
to stop her.
180
00:14:38,813 --> 00:14:40,381
But it never came.
181
00:14:41,215 --> 00:14:48,055
Only the daunting whispers of
wind pushing her further to the edge.
182
00:14:51,593 --> 00:14:52,827
Then...
183
00:14:53,160 --> 00:14:55,730
when she least expected it...
184
00:14:55,864 --> 00:14:59,299
Something grabbed her attention.
185
00:16:31,893 --> 00:16:34,428
Oh my God, that looks so good.
186
00:16:34,829 --> 00:16:37,966
Oh I've also been spit balling
some names.
187
00:16:38,098 --> 00:16:41,636
What do you think
about Ricky, hmmm?
188
00:16:42,637 --> 00:16:43,805
Yay or nay?
189
00:16:45,540 --> 00:16:46,340
Yay!
190
00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:48,208
Ready! Here comes the airplane.
191
00:16:57,217 --> 00:17:02,657
She finally found a man
to get through life with.
192
00:17:02,790 --> 00:17:04,759
Things were better.
193
00:17:06,460 --> 00:17:10,097
He was everything she
ever wanted.
194
00:17:10,932 --> 00:17:12,567
A good listener.
195
00:17:14,936 --> 00:17:17,170
A shoulder to lean on.
196
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,476
The strong silent type.
197
00:17:25,379 --> 00:17:28,282
The prom date she never had.
198
00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:32,620
She was so glad they met.
199
00:17:32,754 --> 00:17:34,321
I'm so glad we met.
200
00:17:34,989 --> 00:17:38,425
And although he may
have been dead.
201
00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:41,261
For the first time in years.
202
00:17:41,428 --> 00:17:43,130
She was alive.
203
00:17:50,270 --> 00:17:51,506
Oooh.
204
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:53,675
Can't even begin to tell you,
205
00:17:53,808 --> 00:17:58,546
how long, so long, we've been
waiting for Edna to find a man.
206
00:18:01,315 --> 00:18:03,317
Not that long.
207
00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:12,694
All right,
208
00:18:12,827 --> 00:18:13,827
subject change,
209
00:18:14,896 --> 00:18:16,496
So... Ricky,
210
00:18:16,698 --> 00:18:20,602
tell us about yourself,
what do you do?
211
00:18:21,636 --> 00:18:23,203
He's so cute,
212
00:18:23,337 --> 00:18:25,540
and so shy.
213
00:18:26,406 --> 00:18:27,709
Busy bee...
- OK, you know what,
214
00:18:27,842 --> 00:18:30,410
I can't, I there's
no way I can do this.
215
00:18:30,545 --> 00:18:32,513
Nope.
- Do what.
216
00:18:34,247 --> 00:18:35,282
Are you?
217
00:18:35,750 --> 00:18:38,987
Seriously gonna make me say
this right now.
218
00:18:39,152 --> 00:18:40,287
Mm-hmm
219
00:18:42,590 --> 00:18:43,625
He's...
220
00:18:43,758 --> 00:18:44,892
He's dead.
221
00:18:45,994 --> 00:18:47,528
He's dead.
222
00:18:47,762 --> 00:18:50,282
Can you please just try
and be happy for me just for once
223
00:18:50,330 --> 00:18:51,799
I would be happy for you if you
224
00:18:51,933 --> 00:18:54,234
brought a boyfriend
along that was alive.
225
00:18:54,368 --> 00:18:57,605
- God. Can you stop?
- He's not so.
226
00:18:57,772 --> 00:18:58,772
He's not.
227
00:18:59,272 --> 00:19:00,575
I get it all right.
228
00:19:00,708 --> 00:19:02,977
Please stop.
- Edna.
229
00:19:03,111 --> 00:19:05,421
- You're embarrassing me in front of my date.
- You can't do this.
230
00:19:05,445 --> 00:19:07,147
- Yes I can.
- There's nobody...
231
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:08,850
Oh my God!
232
00:19:08,983 --> 00:19:10,685
- No.
- Oh God uhm.
233
00:19:12,620 --> 00:19:14,454
I find a man that I am
in love with
234
00:19:14,589 --> 00:19:16,189
and you can't even be
happy for me.
235
00:19:16,323 --> 00:19:19,192
It's disgusting. I would not
tell her what is going on here,
236
00:19:19,326 --> 00:19:21,161
- I... uhm...
- Yo.
237
00:19:21,294 --> 00:19:22,329
Help me out here.
238
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:24,364
Uhm... Well.
239
00:19:27,001 --> 00:19:29,504
Yeah, it's pretty disturbing.
240
00:19:29,637 --> 00:19:30,437
Edna.
241
00:19:30,571 --> 00:19:32,339
You can't do this.
242
00:19:32,707 --> 00:19:37,344
I'm really worried
about your mental health.
243
00:19:39,212 --> 00:19:40,748
Fine.
244
00:19:41,983 --> 00:19:44,418
That's the way you feel.
245
00:19:46,154 --> 00:19:47,622
Come on Ricky.
246
00:19:48,523 --> 00:19:51,959
They hate us because
they ain't us.
247
00:19:52,225 --> 00:19:53,761
Yeah, that's it.
248
00:19:53,895 --> 00:19:55,228
Oh I'm so...
249
00:19:56,229 --> 00:19:57,230
sorry.
250
00:19:57,364 --> 00:19:59,801
Got him, there, okay...
251
00:20:00,835 --> 00:20:05,139
I'm never going to be able
to come here again.
252
00:20:05,272 --> 00:20:08,241
So I was thinking we could go to
253
00:20:08,442 --> 00:20:12,379
don't know the beach
or something tomorrow.
254
00:20:12,513 --> 00:20:16,651
I know you're not the biggest
fan of water, but.
255
00:20:16,784 --> 00:20:17,919
I don't know.
256
00:20:19,286 --> 00:20:21,756
We could do a picnic or...
257
00:20:36,504 --> 00:20:40,208
They never did make it
to the beach.
258
00:20:40,340 --> 00:20:43,443
Instead, she just stayed up
for days,
259
00:20:43,578 --> 00:20:47,347
fueled by her friend's
harsh opinions.
260
00:20:47,982 --> 00:20:50,484
In fact,
the more time that passed,
261
00:20:50,618 --> 00:20:54,522
the more lifeless he
seemed to become.
262
00:20:56,924 --> 00:20:58,626
Then once again,
263
00:20:59,093 --> 00:21:01,328
when she least expected.
264
00:21:01,461 --> 00:21:04,832
Something grabbed her attention.
265
00:24:12,620 --> 00:24:14,956
What happened to me?
266
00:24:18,592 --> 00:24:20,561
You weren't dead.
267
00:24:22,530 --> 00:24:25,599
And I brought you back to life.
268
00:24:28,903 --> 00:24:31,806
That was pretty cool of you.
269
00:24:40,348 --> 00:24:44,018
He explained how his
actual name was Cider.
270
00:24:44,151 --> 00:24:46,520
My actual name is cider.
271
00:24:47,054 --> 00:24:48,089
Really?
272
00:24:48,222 --> 00:24:49,924
- Like the drink?
- I know it's biblical.
273
00:24:50,057 --> 00:24:53,761
It means liqueur derived
from the juice of fruits.
274
00:24:53,894 --> 00:24:56,530
Yeah, so like the drink.
275
00:24:57,398 --> 00:24:58,666
Sure.
276
00:24:59,066 --> 00:25:00,201
Uh... well...
277
00:25:00,334 --> 00:25:02,503
It's just, I've been calling
you Ricky so...
278
00:25:02,636 --> 00:25:03,636
- Ricky?
- Yeah.
279
00:25:03,738 --> 00:25:05,673
Man do I seem Latin to you?
280
00:25:05,806 --> 00:25:08,509
No, no, I just,
always liked that name.
281
00:25:08,642 --> 00:25:10,478
Let's just stick with Cider.
282
00:25:10,611 --> 00:25:12,213
I feel like it's part
of my core.
283
00:25:12,346 --> 00:25:13,681
It's part of my essence.
284
00:25:13,814 --> 00:25:15,649
Oh yeah, of course.
285
00:25:15,783 --> 00:25:17,918
I mean it is your name.
286
00:25:18,919 --> 00:25:21,622
Rename you that's crazy.
287
00:25:24,558 --> 00:25:26,093
I'm dying for a grilled cheese.
288
00:25:26,227 --> 00:25:27,428
Doesn't that sound good?
289
00:25:27,561 --> 00:25:29,430
Those are fattening.
290
00:25:29,563 --> 00:25:31,298
This place is really cool,
291
00:25:31,432 --> 00:25:33,543
but it seems like they're trying to
capitalize on a young generation,
292
00:25:33,567 --> 00:25:35,202
revisiting vintage Americana,
293
00:25:35,336 --> 00:25:38,205
and I would think that would
include vegan options to just show
294
00:25:38,339 --> 00:25:39,740
a nod to that generation.
295
00:25:39,874 --> 00:25:41,208
Hey, we know you, we get you.
296
00:25:41,342 --> 00:25:42,543
We know what you want.
297
00:25:42,676 --> 00:25:44,378
Oh I didn't know you're a vegan.
298
00:25:44,513 --> 00:25:46,180
No I'm not.
299
00:25:48,315 --> 00:25:49,750
But...
300
00:25:50,718 --> 00:25:54,055
You don't have to be
vegan to care.
301
00:26:01,796 --> 00:26:04,298
What are you laughing at?
302
00:26:04,698 --> 00:26:06,934
OK, be honest.
What do you think?
303
00:26:07,068 --> 00:26:12,740
My ho useless friend Vic spent two years
collecting clothes and reclaimed fabrics,
304
00:26:12,873 --> 00:26:19,847
and we gave birth to this outfit right
after our first experience with the DMT.
305
00:26:19,980 --> 00:26:22,349
That's exactly what it
looks like.
306
00:26:22,483 --> 00:26:23,552
No,
307
00:26:23,818 --> 00:26:26,887
I think it makes my ass pop too.
308
00:26:40,101 --> 00:26:41,202
What's uh?
309
00:26:42,303 --> 00:26:43,538
What's this?
310
00:26:44,438 --> 00:26:49,276
Well, I didn't want to come
right out and say it, but this is me.
311
00:26:49,410 --> 00:26:50,644
Really?
312
00:26:51,779 --> 00:26:52,980
That's you.
313
00:26:53,614 --> 00:26:58,385
- Singing...
- Singing, drumming, strumming, producing.
314
00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:01,956
I spent three years of my life
traveling with Russian hobos
315
00:27:02,089 --> 00:27:04,291
on the back of a cargo train
and I wrote this song.
316
00:27:04,425 --> 00:27:05,594
It's about that-
317
00:27:08,129 --> 00:27:10,397
Oh shh, shh, Shut up.
318
00:27:10,532 --> 00:27:11,799
Wait.
319
00:27:12,433 --> 00:27:14,536
This is my favorite part.
320
00:27:14,668 --> 00:27:16,670
This is the real genius seed.
321
00:27:29,750 --> 00:27:32,920
Come on, look at what I'm doing.
322
00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:29,310
- Lower body. Lower.
- Like this?
323
00:28:29,443 --> 00:28:31,312
Like th-Lower!
324
00:28:31,445 --> 00:28:32,846
Like.
- Ah.
325
00:28:32,980 --> 00:28:35,082
Yeah, it's not really your
fault, it's your body.
326
00:28:37,985 --> 00:28:40,387
OK, ready, watch this.
327
00:29:22,396 --> 00:29:24,699
It was then she realized
she was never going to let
328
00:29:24,832 --> 00:29:28,936
her happiness be dependent
on another human again.
329
00:29:29,069 --> 00:29:30,938
As he forwarded down that river,
330
00:29:31,071 --> 00:29:36,076
she realized that true importance
and power of independence.
331
00:29:36,210 --> 00:29:38,279
The lonesome nights and string
of bad dates
332
00:29:38,412 --> 00:29:43,150
were a dream compared to
the nightmare she called Rick.
333
00:29:43,284 --> 00:29:45,687
But whatever the fuck
his name was,
334
00:29:45,819 --> 00:29:47,622
as you'll see in our next story,
335
00:29:47,756 --> 00:29:50,457
we're going to focus
on the power of friendship.
336
00:29:50,592 --> 00:29:52,627
Might want to grab some popcorn
on this one.
337
00:29:53,794 --> 00:29:56,130
It's about to get wild.
338
00:30:10,144 --> 00:30:12,479
3 little piggies
came to the market.
339
00:30:12,614 --> 00:30:14,783
Everyone get the fuck down.
340
00:30:14,915 --> 00:30:17,017
I said everyone get the
fuck down!
341
00:30:19,320 --> 00:30:20,921
Not you fat boy.
342
00:30:21,055 --> 00:30:22,423
Get up.
343
00:30:22,557 --> 00:30:24,559
We're going to make
this nice and easy.
344
00:30:24,693 --> 00:30:26,160
You do exactly as we say.
345
00:30:26,293 --> 00:30:28,495
Let us do our thing
and that's it.
346
00:30:28,630 --> 00:30:30,397
Do you understand?
347
00:30:30,532 --> 00:30:32,499
Do you understand!?
348
00:30:33,735 --> 00:30:35,069
Why you doing this?
349
00:30:35,202 --> 00:30:38,272
What a great question.
350
00:30:59,059 --> 00:31:01,859
Dude you've been looking
at her all night. Just go talk to her.
351
00:31:01,895 --> 00:31:03,130
Why do you do this?
352
00:31:03,263 --> 00:31:04,465
Do what?
353
00:31:04,932 --> 00:31:06,133
Push me.
354
00:31:06,266 --> 00:31:08,102
I don't push you. Luke
do I push him?
355
00:31:08,235 --> 00:31:09,370
You're trying to help?
356
00:31:09,504 --> 00:31:11,573
He's trying to help.
- Thank you.
357
00:31:11,706 --> 00:31:15,943
Listen guys, I appreciate the sentiment
and everything but I'm fine..I... I...
358
00:31:16,076 --> 00:31:17,545
I don't need it.
359
00:31:17,679 --> 00:31:19,848
You know why you guys do this
every week after week.
360
00:31:19,980 --> 00:31:21,014
No.
361
00:31:21,716 --> 00:31:24,552
Because you guys have settled
down, we've gotten older,
362
00:31:24,686 --> 00:31:27,756
you've gotten comfy and listen,
there's nothing wrong with that at all.
363
00:31:27,921 --> 00:31:29,256
It's totally fine,
364
00:31:29,390 --> 00:31:32,493
but you guys want to go
talk to a girl like that.
365
00:31:32,627 --> 00:31:34,194
I don't, you do.
366
00:31:34,629 --> 00:31:36,029
Okay.
367
00:31:36,163 --> 00:31:39,066
And you project that
onto me and it's... Wow.
368
00:31:39,199 --> 00:31:40,599
- I'm projecting?
- You're laughing,
369
00:31:40,668 --> 00:31:42,345
it's true though.
- I'm trying to help you out.
370
00:31:42,369 --> 00:31:43,649
What kind of friends would we be
371
00:31:43,772 --> 00:31:45,305
if we weren't trying to
get you laid?
372
00:31:45,439 --> 00:31:47,341
You guys would be
awesome friends, like friends
373
00:31:47,474 --> 00:31:49,511
that I would wanna come
out with every Wednesday
374
00:31:49,644 --> 00:31:52,079
and do this kind of shit
but this...
375
00:31:52,212 --> 00:31:53,882
tired of it.
376
00:31:54,014 --> 00:31:55,282
Jesus man.
377
00:31:56,183 --> 00:32:00,789
Sorry, it's just it's more complicated
than you guys would think okay?
378
00:32:00,954 --> 00:32:03,357
- What's so complicated about it?
- There you go pushing.
379
00:32:03,490 --> 00:32:05,527
I'm not pushing.
I'm asking a question.
380
00:32:05,660 --> 00:32:06,960
He's asking a question.
381
00:32:07,094 --> 00:32:08,506
A friendly question.
- It's out a concern.
382
00:32:08,530 --> 00:32:12,299
- Stop being so sensitive.
- I can't come.
383
00:32:12,433 --> 00:32:13,568
OK.
384
00:32:14,869 --> 00:32:16,103
Say what?
385
00:32:17,037 --> 00:32:18,071
I...
386
00:32:18,205 --> 00:32:19,541
Come here.
387
00:32:20,174 --> 00:32:21,709
No come here.
388
00:32:23,243 --> 00:32:25,078
I can't come.
389
00:32:25,914 --> 00:32:28,348
I've never been able to.
390
00:32:29,016 --> 00:32:30,718
What like never?
391
00:32:32,953 --> 00:32:34,188
Once.
392
00:32:35,289 --> 00:32:36,691
I came close.
393
00:32:38,726 --> 00:32:40,360
I was like 14.
394
00:32:40,961 --> 00:32:43,297
Was laying in bed and I.
395
00:32:43,631 --> 00:32:45,199
Figured why not.
396
00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:47,569
And so I.
397
00:32:48,135 --> 00:32:49,647
Was in the middle
of going at it, and I
398
00:32:49,671 --> 00:32:53,073
heard a window
break in the other room.
399
00:32:53,207 --> 00:32:54,341
And I got out of bed.
400
00:32:54,475 --> 00:32:56,544
I pulled up my pants and...
401
00:32:56,678 --> 00:32:59,246
Peaked my little head
around the corner.
402
00:32:59,379 --> 00:33:02,015
There was this burglar.
403
00:33:03,217 --> 00:33:06,320
He was just taking a bunch
of my dad's shit.
404
00:33:06,453 --> 00:33:09,924
Shit, so you're like
traumatized,
405
00:33:10,290 --> 00:33:13,060
that's that's the thing I...
406
00:33:13,260 --> 00:33:15,996
I sat there and I,
I watched him.
407
00:33:16,129 --> 00:33:17,464
I...
408
00:33:17,866 --> 00:33:19,834
And lo and behold, I...
409
00:33:20,467 --> 00:33:22,637
Was as hard as a rock.
410
00:33:30,143 --> 00:33:31,613
Wait, what?
411
00:33:32,012 --> 00:33:35,148
It's like the more shit this guy
grabbed.
412
00:33:35,282 --> 00:33:37,117
And the heavier his...
413
00:33:37,251 --> 00:33:39,319
His breathing got.
414
00:33:39,587 --> 00:33:41,154
The harder I got.
415
00:33:42,557 --> 00:33:45,259
I was weirdly kind of hot.
416
00:33:49,864 --> 00:33:51,031
So like I said.
417
00:33:51,666 --> 00:33:55,737
It's a lot more complicated
than you would think.
418
00:33:55,870 --> 00:33:58,205
Yeah.
419
00:34:05,145 --> 00:34:07,481
So shots or...
420
00:34:08,415 --> 00:34:10,183
I have an idea.
421
00:34:34,642 --> 00:34:38,312
Take it all,
then let's kill the kid.
422
00:34:38,445 --> 00:34:40,615
Sounds good.
423
00:34:49,958 --> 00:34:53,761
Should we like cut off
his face and take turns wearing it?
424
00:34:53,895 --> 00:34:55,329
Yeah.
425
00:34:59,033 --> 00:35:00,133
Guys I...
426
00:35:00,334 --> 00:35:02,102
I know it's you.
427
00:35:03,270 --> 00:35:05,105
Okay.
- You gotta die now!
428
00:35:05,238 --> 00:35:07,685
Can you get that out of
my eyes please? It's really early.
429
00:35:07,709 --> 00:35:09,944
- Are you hard?
- Nope.
430
00:35:10,243 --> 00:35:12,346
- You sure?
- Positive.
431
00:35:12,479 --> 00:35:14,682
- Can we see it?
- Nope.
432
00:35:15,583 --> 00:35:17,284
What what was it
that didn't work?
433
00:35:17,417 --> 00:35:20,855
I can 100%
see your faces right now.
434
00:35:22,757 --> 00:35:25,760
Well, that's super
disappointing.
435
00:35:25,893 --> 00:35:28,630
I want to go, this is stupid.
436
00:35:28,763 --> 00:35:29,597
Okay.
437
00:35:29,731 --> 00:35:32,700
- Bye dude sweet dreams.
- Yup.
438
00:36:00,327 --> 00:36:02,664
Jimmy, this is getting
ridiculous man.
439
00:36:02,797 --> 00:36:04,164
We almost had him man.
440
00:36:04,297 --> 00:36:05,499
No, no, we didn't.
441
00:36:05,633 --> 00:36:09,003
We need something bigger,
something better.
442
00:36:09,137 --> 00:36:10,404
Like what?
443
00:36:17,177 --> 00:36:19,479
Why are you doing this?
444
00:36:19,847 --> 00:36:20,982
Anything?
445
00:36:21,949 --> 00:36:24,251
No.
446
00:36:24,384 --> 00:36:26,253
What about this?
447
00:36:28,056 --> 00:36:29,857
No no.
448
00:36:30,758 --> 00:36:32,192
Fuck!
449
00:36:36,097 --> 00:36:37,999
The fuck! No!
450
00:36:38,265 --> 00:36:42,603
I need you to be fucking straight with
me right here right now, is this happening?
451
00:36:42,737 --> 00:36:46,040
- I don't know.
- What do you mean you don't know!
452
00:36:46,174 --> 00:36:47,407
I'm sorry!
453
00:36:51,244 --> 00:36:52,547
What?
454
00:36:57,552 --> 00:36:58,720
Get down.
455
00:36:59,721 --> 00:37:00,855
KCPD!
456
00:37:00,988 --> 00:37:02,228
- Get down!
- Put your gun down!
457
00:37:02,289 --> 00:37:03,758
Put your fucking gun down!
458
00:37:06,994 --> 00:37:10,665
Get on the ground now!
On the ground, there you go!
459
00:37:10,798 --> 00:37:11,999
Don't move.
460
00:37:15,703 --> 00:37:16,738
Oh Jesus.
461
00:37:18,206 --> 00:37:20,074
We gotta guy down over here.
462
00:37:50,104 --> 00:37:51,371
I'm sorry.
463
00:37:52,339 --> 00:37:54,675
This was huge mistake.
464
00:37:58,112 --> 00:37:59,379
No.
465
00:38:03,918 --> 00:38:05,485
It wasn't.
466
00:38:26,574 --> 00:38:27,809
We gotta go!
467
00:38:32,013 --> 00:38:33,781
Hold your ground!
468
00:38:41,189 --> 00:38:43,423
Don't do it!
469
00:38:46,093 --> 00:38:47,595
Drop the gun!
470
00:39:31,138 --> 00:39:33,708
What kind of
friends would we be?
471
00:39:33,841 --> 00:39:36,811
If we were trying to get laid.
472
00:39:38,079 --> 00:39:41,048
The best friends.
473
00:39:41,182 --> 00:39:44,986
The best freaking friends
I ever had.
474
00:41:19,413 --> 00:41:22,283
Hey baby girl baby girl.
475
00:41:22,817 --> 00:41:27,154
Yep, I just just dropped off
my last package.
476
00:41:30,057 --> 00:41:31,625
That's cool.
477
00:41:32,593 --> 00:41:35,930
But hey listen, I got 2 words
for you
478
00:41:36,063 --> 00:41:37,665
red box.
479
00:41:39,233 --> 00:41:40,468
Yep.
480
00:41:40,801 --> 00:41:42,837
Daddy is going to
pick up a little flick and
481
00:41:42,970 --> 00:41:46,874
then he's going to
give you a little di-
482
00:41:51,712 --> 00:41:54,882
Hey, let me let me
call you back.
483
00:43:42,056 --> 00:43:43,491
Hello.
484
00:43:44,125 --> 00:43:49,296
Kritika Express, I need a
signature here! In the back!
485
00:43:49,430 --> 00:43:53,667
We're uh, we're advised
not to do that, Sir.
486
00:43:54,603 --> 00:43:58,272
I just need a signature
and I'll be on my way.
487
00:43:58,405 --> 00:44:00,641
Try and find me.
488
00:44:05,379 --> 00:44:06,780
OK...
489
00:44:41,849 --> 00:44:43,150
Hello.
490
00:44:46,621 --> 00:44:48,222
Sir.
491
00:44:53,628 --> 00:44:55,062
Wow.
492
00:44:56,430 --> 00:44:57,798
Yep.
493
00:44:59,934 --> 00:45:02,203
Just need a signature
here on the package
494
00:45:02,336 --> 00:45:05,306
and I'll be on my way so...
- We don't have much time,
495
00:45:05,439 --> 00:45:07,208
so I'll brass tacks it.
496
00:45:07,341 --> 00:45:09,410
Probably wondering why
you're holding a package
497
00:45:09,544 --> 00:45:13,047
addressed to here,
but with your name on it.
498
00:45:13,180 --> 00:45:15,149
Yeah.
499
00:45:15,684 --> 00:45:17,184
Coincidence?
500
00:45:17,686 --> 00:45:19,153
How did you know that's my name?
501
00:45:19,286 --> 00:45:23,257
Look in order to not disturb
the space time continuum,
502
00:45:23,390 --> 00:45:27,161
I need to be injected
with your... with our DNA.
503
00:45:27,294 --> 00:45:30,665
Otherwise the chance
the whole process fails,
504
00:45:30,798 --> 00:45:32,399
and then we're fucked.
505
00:45:32,534 --> 00:45:34,603
What are you talking
about talking about?
506
00:45:34,735 --> 00:45:40,374
I'm talking about the end
la fin, vamoose, extinction
507
00:45:40,508 --> 00:45:42,109
in exactly 92 minutes
508
00:45:42,243 --> 00:45:44,546
and 46 seconds an asteroid
is going to come down-
509
00:45:44,679 --> 00:45:45,879
Oh, I get it.
510
00:45:46,013 --> 00:45:49,750
You're one of these crazy
desert guys, huh?
511
00:45:49,883 --> 00:45:52,319
You talk to lizards and,
512
00:45:52,520 --> 00:45:53,921
hang out in the sun.
513
00:45:54,054 --> 00:45:56,090
I don't have time
to small talk with details.
514
00:45:56,223 --> 00:45:58,593
I'm you from the future
and you're me from the past.
515
00:45:58,727 --> 00:46:04,666
And the only way to stop this thing
is if you blast me with your DNA.
516
00:46:08,603 --> 00:46:12,072
What?
- Oh come on, you think it's funny?
517
00:46:12,206 --> 00:46:17,077
Well, it won't be so funny
when we're tiny bits of ash.
518
00:46:17,211 --> 00:46:19,847
All right, let's let's play,
pretend and say I believe you,
519
00:46:19,980 --> 00:46:22,584
which I absolutely do not.
520
00:46:22,717 --> 00:46:24,952
You expect me to do what just,
521
00:46:25,085 --> 00:46:28,422
pull my hair out
and give it to you.
522
00:46:30,257 --> 00:46:34,295
It's going to take more
than that, buddy.
523
00:46:36,330 --> 00:46:37,865
Saliva.
524
00:46:38,633 --> 00:46:40,100
Close.
525
00:46:44,271 --> 00:46:45,439
Blood.
526
00:46:45,573 --> 00:46:47,308
Ooh, gross...
527
00:46:47,776 --> 00:46:49,577
But warmer.
528
00:46:53,113 --> 00:46:54,749
I think you just,
529
00:46:55,215 --> 00:46:57,418
need the sign for
the package sir.
530
00:46:57,552 --> 00:47:01,255
Well unfortunately I
can't do that.
531
00:47:01,723 --> 00:47:04,892
Until you do what's necessary.
532
00:47:07,995 --> 00:47:09,463
Well...
533
00:47:09,597 --> 00:47:12,099
Kritika's policy you can just
pick it up at the office.
534
00:47:12,232 --> 00:47:13,233
Mm hmm.
535
00:47:20,441 --> 00:47:23,043
I ain't happy about it
either, kid,
536
00:47:23,177 --> 00:47:28,516
but it's the only way to ensure
the survival of mankind.
537
00:47:41,362 --> 00:47:45,499
Sorry, the number you
have dialed is not in service at this time.
538
00:47:45,633 --> 00:47:47,401
Not one fucking bar.
539
00:47:51,573 --> 00:47:54,576
I'm you from the future.
You're me from the past.
540
00:47:59,046 --> 00:48:02,449
You're gonna be okay.
541
00:48:03,083 --> 00:48:05,152
This...
542
00:48:07,121 --> 00:48:09,022
Come on, come on.
543
00:48:11,392 --> 00:48:14,161
It's unbelievable.
- Well, if that ain't fate.
544
00:48:14,294 --> 00:48:16,598
I don't know what to tell you.
545
00:48:16,731 --> 00:48:17,731
Well it's not.
546
00:48:17,799 --> 00:48:19,634
It's not fate, it's illegal,
547
00:48:19,768 --> 00:48:22,837
you're kind of holding me
captive here so...
548
00:48:22,970 --> 00:48:24,672
You think it was me.
549
00:48:25,272 --> 00:48:28,610
I've been here with you
the whole time.
550
00:48:28,743 --> 00:48:30,277
Relax man.
551
00:48:31,078 --> 00:48:32,614
You hungry?
552
00:48:33,515 --> 00:48:34,582
No.
553
00:48:34,948 --> 00:48:36,885
How about a cold one?
554
00:48:37,017 --> 00:48:38,553
No, I'm good.
555
00:49:00,675 --> 00:49:03,845
So what do you suggest
that I do?
556
00:49:04,178 --> 00:49:05,847
I told you, man.
557
00:49:06,581 --> 00:49:08,148
Look, I know it's a lot
to take in,
558
00:49:08,282 --> 00:49:09,551
but with all due respect,
559
00:49:09,684 --> 00:49:11,294
I'm the one that's going
to have to take it.
560
00:49:11,318 --> 00:49:13,287
I'm not gonna fuck
you, man. This is insane.
561
00:49:13,420 --> 00:49:15,255
Well unfortunately fucking me
562
00:49:15,389 --> 00:49:17,759
is the only way
you're getting out of here.
563
00:49:17,892 --> 00:49:22,597
And if you don't, you ain't going
to have much time to do anything.
564
00:49:22,730 --> 00:49:25,375
Oh yeah, it's the only way I'm
getting out of here. Well watch this.
565
00:49:25,399 --> 00:49:31,438
Oh well you know it's a long walk
from here what you plan on hitchhiking, ha!
566
00:49:31,573 --> 00:49:32,907
Good luck.
567
00:49:33,641 --> 00:49:36,711
This guy is fucking insane.
568
00:49:36,845 --> 00:49:38,613
He's a desert rat.
569
00:49:39,079 --> 00:49:43,217
That's all he is
just a fucking desert rat.
570
00:49:43,651 --> 00:49:45,319
Full of shit.
571
00:49:46,987 --> 00:49:51,626
His voice is fucking 2... 3
octaves higher than mine.
572
00:49:57,998 --> 00:49:59,299
Hey look,
573
00:49:59,701 --> 00:50:02,804
I know that seeing yourself
living in shit like this
574
00:50:02,937 --> 00:50:07,074
isn't the picturesque life
you imagine for yourself.
575
00:50:07,207 --> 00:50:09,878
But you know its got
its perks, you know.
576
00:50:10,010 --> 00:50:12,012
You live a very full life.
577
00:50:12,145 --> 00:50:18,586
Sure, there's that little black tar heroin
phase that eventually leads to most,
578
00:50:18,720 --> 00:50:21,255
if not all, friends and family
cutting you out completely.
579
00:50:21,388 --> 00:50:25,927
But you know, that's what 25 years
of delivering packages does to a man.
580
00:50:26,059 --> 00:50:28,730
Can you just please shut up?
581
00:50:29,129 --> 00:50:30,264
Please.
- Sure.
582
00:50:30,397 --> 00:50:33,535
- Thank you.
- Yeah, sure, no worries
583
00:50:33,668 --> 00:50:36,804
Hey, you know we got
a birthday coming up.
584
00:50:36,938 --> 00:50:38,706
That's exciting.
585
00:50:41,441 --> 00:50:44,712
How did you know that?
- I got a bottle of the good stuff in the Dome.
586
00:50:44,846 --> 00:50:48,048
We could, maybe do this
thing black out.
587
00:50:48,181 --> 00:50:49,717
Nah I'm good man.
588
00:50:49,851 --> 00:50:51,862
I don't know how else to tell you that.
- Okay, alright.
589
00:50:51,886 --> 00:50:52,921
All right.
590
00:50:53,086 --> 00:50:54,354
Hey look
591
00:50:54,722 --> 00:50:59,459
why don't we like I don't know
ease into this thing.
592
00:51:00,460 --> 00:51:04,933
I could start like nibbling at
your neck, or something like that.
593
00:51:05,065 --> 00:51:06,266
Stop please.
594
00:51:06,500 --> 00:51:08,368
You're so fucking weird.
595
00:51:08,502 --> 00:51:11,005
Are you not reading
my body language at like...
596
00:51:11,138 --> 00:51:12,674
Can you just shut
the fuck up please?
597
00:51:12,807 --> 00:51:14,308
OK I got it.
598
00:51:15,108 --> 00:51:18,245
Why don't we go inside?
It's kind of cold out here.
599
00:51:18,378 --> 00:51:20,815
I promise I ain't gonna
do anything weird.
600
00:51:20,949 --> 00:51:23,651
Absolutely nothing weird.
601
00:51:25,920 --> 00:51:27,589
Scouts honor.
602
00:51:31,325 --> 00:51:34,596
Come on, it's cold out here.
603
00:51:39,567 --> 00:51:43,037
You know how I know
you're not me?
604
00:51:43,170 --> 00:51:44,706
Your TV sucks.
605
00:51:45,773 --> 00:51:46,874
Hmm.
606
00:51:47,441 --> 00:51:50,778
This do anything for
your big boy.
607
00:51:52,013 --> 00:51:54,348
Your... your nipples?
608
00:51:55,049 --> 00:51:56,751
No makes me feel,
609
00:51:57,652 --> 00:52:03,190
Pretty uncomfortable.
- Don't knock-'em till you try-'em.
610
00:52:03,323 --> 00:52:06,628
I got a girl with perfect
nipples.
611
00:52:07,528 --> 00:52:09,697
Waiting for me at home
612
00:52:09,831 --> 00:52:11,599
in a nice bed with,
613
00:52:12,466 --> 00:52:13,467
clean sheets.
614
00:52:13,601 --> 00:52:15,469
They're not always clean.
615
00:52:15,603 --> 00:52:18,271
What is that supposed to mean?
616
00:52:18,405 --> 00:52:21,609
Let's face it, you ain't
Brad Pitt.
617
00:52:22,543 --> 00:52:24,078
She's a hot club girl.
618
00:52:24,211 --> 00:52:25,780
Tons of options.
619
00:52:26,814 --> 00:52:30,118
And that Armenian DJ that's
always hanging around.
620
00:52:32,587 --> 00:52:34,822
He's a friend.
- Oh wake up man.
621
00:52:34,956 --> 00:52:38,926
Who's in your Christmas
card last year?
622
00:52:39,694 --> 00:52:43,898
So she's she's cheating on me
now. Is that what you're saying?
623
00:52:45,933 --> 00:52:49,871
Why am I watching a children's
show with a dirty bum, in a dome.
624
00:52:50,004 --> 00:52:52,507
What am I even doing here.
625
00:52:54,341 --> 00:52:56,209
Yep, I'm leaving can't do it.
626
00:52:56,343 --> 00:52:59,547
There he goes again, wait!
627
00:53:01,181 --> 00:53:03,785
- What.
- Open the package.
628
00:53:04,418 --> 00:53:08,355
- What?
- The package you brought, open it.
629
00:53:08,790 --> 00:53:11,859
You need to see what's inside.
630
00:54:05,479 --> 00:54:07,414
There's no way.
631
00:54:11,384 --> 00:54:13,286
There's no way.
632
00:54:14,989 --> 00:54:16,758
Go fuck yourself.
633
00:54:21,529 --> 00:54:23,497
Go fuck yourself.
634
00:54:28,401 --> 00:54:30,370
Go fuck yourself.
635
00:54:45,452 --> 00:54:50,091
I'm you from the future
and you're me from the past.
636
00:54:50,224 --> 00:54:55,328
I'm not gonna fuck you
man. This is insane.
637
00:54:57,198 --> 00:54:59,100
Well, unfortunately fucking me
638
00:54:59,233 --> 00:55:01,501
is the only way
you're getting out of here.
639
00:55:01,636 --> 00:55:07,575
And if you don't, you're not going
to have much time to do anything.
640
00:55:19,020 --> 00:55:20,721
Hey.
641
00:55:22,290 --> 00:55:23,724
Hey yourself.
642
00:55:29,664 --> 00:55:31,498
What are we doing?
643
00:55:32,399 --> 00:55:33,868
This is nuts.
644
00:55:35,169 --> 00:55:38,338
We're doing what's necessary.
645
00:55:50,685 --> 00:55:54,387
Let's bring this thing
home, brother.
646
00:55:56,123 --> 00:55:57,390
Oh.
647
00:56:31,993 --> 00:56:33,160
1.
648
00:56:33,393 --> 00:56:34,695
2.
649
00:56:35,129 --> 00:56:36,264
3.
650
00:56:40,400 --> 00:56:41,602
Fuck yes!
651
00:56:41,969 --> 00:56:43,070
Fuck yes.
652
00:57:10,064 --> 00:57:12,767
Meat lovers.
653
00:57:51,238 --> 00:57:53,473
Wild Bills!
654
00:57:56,610 --> 00:57:58,179
Pizza!
655
00:58:10,291 --> 00:58:11,892
Another day.
656
00:58:12,226 --> 00:58:14,228
Another cream pie.
657
00:58:25,973 --> 00:58:29,610
Let's make this more
interesting.
658
00:58:29,977 --> 00:58:31,612
Yeah.
659
00:58:53,467 --> 00:58:54,869
Wow.
660
00:58:56,537 --> 00:58:57,905
Yep.
661
00:59:36,877 --> 00:59:38,913
Let's change subjects.
662
00:59:39,046 --> 00:59:40,748
This one starts on
the other side of town
663
00:59:40,881 --> 00:59:43,684
with a group of poker
playing mobsters.
664
00:59:43,818 --> 00:59:47,621
Set up you've seen
1000 times before.
665
00:59:48,189 --> 00:59:49,757
Only this.
666
00:59:49,890 --> 00:59:51,258
Has a twist.
667
01:00:06,841 --> 01:00:09,777
Oh, oh, oh I got one,
I got a good one.
668
01:00:09,910 --> 01:00:12,179
Why do Italian men grow
mustaches?
669
01:00:12,313 --> 01:00:13,347
Uh.
670
01:00:14,281 --> 01:00:15,850
So they could look
like their mother!
671
01:00:20,221 --> 01:00:23,290
Their mother!
Their mother!
672
01:00:24,458 --> 01:00:26,327
Hey! You know, Tony.
673
01:00:29,531 --> 01:00:31,265
I mean, I'd fuck your mother!
674
01:00:48,550 --> 01:00:51,152
You want to fuck my mother?
675
01:00:54,388 --> 01:00:56,924
Tony it's just joke.
676
01:00:57,592 --> 01:01:01,362
Yeah, it's a goof.
677
01:01:13,274 --> 01:01:14,784
You son of a bitch,
you just see your face.
678
01:01:14,808 --> 01:01:15,843
I got you.
679
01:01:29,890 --> 01:01:32,326
Oh my God, Tony!
680
01:01:32,760 --> 01:01:34,028
Yeah man.
681
01:01:34,428 --> 01:01:36,397
Nearly shit myself.
682
01:01:36,598 --> 01:01:38,299
Almost shit my fucking pants.
683
01:01:39,967 --> 01:01:41,368
Oh my God Tony.
684
01:01:41,969 --> 01:01:45,372
Could a given me a heart attack!
685
01:01:45,507 --> 01:01:46,675
Holy shit.
686
01:01:46,807 --> 01:01:47,841
Whoo.
687
01:01:58,852 --> 01:02:00,522
What the fuck!?
688
01:02:00,655 --> 01:02:02,356
You little shit.
689
01:02:20,975 --> 01:02:22,810
What are you guys doing?!
690
01:02:24,579 --> 01:02:26,715
Get in there.
691
01:02:26,847 --> 01:02:27,847
Come on, get in.
692
01:02:51,839 --> 01:02:53,173
Oh.
693
01:02:56,143 --> 01:02:57,579
Hey!
694
01:02:57,811 --> 01:02:59,046
Hey guys!
695
01:02:59,480 --> 01:03:00,515
Tony!
696
01:03:01,882 --> 01:03:03,117
Tony!
697
01:03:24,405 --> 01:03:27,374
Get up, let's go.
698
01:03:32,547 --> 01:03:33,581
Get up.
699
01:03:37,151 --> 01:03:39,053
Hey!
700
01:03:39,386 --> 01:03:41,188
Carmine.
701
01:03:41,989 --> 01:03:43,390
How you doing?
702
01:03:43,692 --> 01:03:45,426
Hey Carmine.
703
01:03:45,560 --> 01:03:49,463
How you feeling you doing OK?
- Guys a...
704
01:03:49,597 --> 01:03:51,165
Fucking legend.
705
01:03:52,333 --> 01:03:56,203
She giving you a grape juice
every day?
706
01:03:57,371 --> 01:04:01,375
Drinks more juice than
Sammy fucking Sosa.
707
01:04:01,509 --> 01:04:05,379
Hey ma, you remember Tutti,
don't you?
708
01:04:05,747 --> 01:04:06,847
Yeah.
709
01:04:07,214 --> 01:04:09,183
Hi boys, Tutti.
710
01:04:11,720 --> 01:04:13,987
Are you staying out of trouble?
711
01:04:14,121 --> 01:04:15,456
Wish we were.
712
01:04:15,590 --> 01:04:17,891
Actually Tutti he said he
wanted to fuck you Ma.
713
01:04:18,025 --> 01:04:20,094
Ain't that right?
Tell her.
714
01:04:20,227 --> 01:04:23,397
Tony come on this is
real fucked up.
715
01:04:23,531 --> 01:04:27,301
I'm going to get-
- You ain't going nowhere.
716
01:04:27,434 --> 01:04:30,070
Is that right Tutti?
717
01:04:30,204 --> 01:04:32,940
You wanna pound me Tutti?
718
01:04:34,141 --> 01:04:36,276
Ah don't be shy today,
just about an hour ago
719
01:04:36,410 --> 01:04:37,945
you said that you wanted
to fuck ma,
720
01:04:38,078 --> 01:04:39,947
pound the pussy and give it
to a real good.
721
01:04:40,080 --> 01:04:42,550
Come on, get in there,
go fuck her.
722
01:04:42,684 --> 01:04:44,485
Come on Tutti don't
embarrass me.
723
01:04:44,619 --> 01:04:46,621
She hasn't been with a hog
in a long time.
724
01:04:46,755 --> 01:04:49,289
Get in there and pound that
pussy and fuck her real good.
725
01:04:49,423 --> 01:04:52,025
Come on show her what you got.
726
01:04:52,159 --> 01:04:54,027
Come on, big shot.
727
01:04:54,161 --> 01:04:56,296
Why don't you come on in?
728
01:04:56,430 --> 01:04:59,933
Get this cream cheese factory
going, huh?
729
01:05:00,067 --> 01:05:02,169
Come on, come get it,
730
01:05:02,436 --> 01:05:06,407
I'm right here,
big boy I'm waiting for ya.
731
01:05:09,209 --> 01:05:10,545
Get up all in.
732
01:05:11,646 --> 01:05:12,847
Come on Tutti.
733
01:05:17,819 --> 01:05:19,153
Balls.
734
01:05:19,888 --> 01:05:22,356
This is some fucked up shit.
735
01:05:22,489 --> 01:05:23,525
Shh.
736
01:05:23,892 --> 01:05:25,192
Come on big boy!
737
01:05:25,325 --> 01:05:28,195
Alright I'm gonna fuck you.
738
01:05:28,328 --> 01:05:29,396
Yeah!
739
01:05:29,531 --> 01:05:31,465
Yeah baby.
740
01:05:31,599 --> 01:05:33,100
Yee haw, yee haw!
741
01:05:35,202 --> 01:05:36,905
Alright Tutti!
742
01:05:37,037 --> 01:05:39,306
Atta boy Tutti get in there!
743
01:05:51,553 --> 01:05:52,587
Mama.
744
01:05:55,623 --> 01:05:58,025
Getting full. I
know this food is so good.
745
01:05:58,158 --> 01:06:00,562
- It's so good, it's amazing.
- Right? This place is great.
746
01:06:00,695 --> 01:06:03,130
And I'm just gonna go ahead
and say it right now.
747
01:06:03,263 --> 01:06:05,332
This is going-
- Extremely well.
748
01:06:05,466 --> 01:06:07,602
- Yeah, yeah.
- I was gonna say the exact same thing.
749
01:06:07,735 --> 01:06:11,739
I mean, it's we're finishing
each other's... Sentences.
750
01:06:11,873 --> 01:06:15,510
Come on with it, you're killing me.
- This is so good.
751
01:06:15,643 --> 01:06:17,779
I mean honestly, it's so hard
to date here.
752
01:06:17,912 --> 01:06:19,079
Oh yeah.
753
01:06:19,213 --> 01:06:21,482
Last week I went on
a date with...
754
01:06:21,616 --> 01:06:23,952
- a blind guy.
- Ohh! A blind, really?
755
01:06:24,084 --> 01:06:26,754
- It was a blind date literally yeah.
- Literally.
756
01:06:26,888 --> 01:06:28,188
Yeah.
757
01:06:28,322 --> 01:06:30,266
I mean, obviously
there's nothing wrong with that,
758
01:06:30,290 --> 01:06:33,761
but give a girl a heads up like
tell me, your tell me you're blind.
759
01:06:33,895 --> 01:06:35,996
Could have shot you a text
or something right?
760
01:06:36,129 --> 01:06:37,799
- Yeah!
- Yeah or...
761
01:06:38,065 --> 01:06:40,902
He couldn't. I don't know do
blind people text I have no idea.
762
01:06:41,034 --> 01:06:42,469
God, I don't know.
763
01:06:42,604 --> 01:06:45,372
I've never thought of that.
- No idea how that works.
764
01:06:45,507 --> 01:06:49,176
Guess I'll never find out because
I let him to go after the first date.
765
01:06:49,309 --> 01:06:50,612
Oh yeah, yeah,
766
01:06:50,745 --> 01:06:52,385
well, I guess he never saw it
coming, huh?
767
01:06:54,147 --> 01:06:55,415
Right?
768
01:06:55,717 --> 01:06:57,952
God, you're so bad.
769
01:07:02,155 --> 01:07:03,290
All right,
770
01:07:03,490 --> 01:07:05,727
what's going on here?
771
01:07:06,694 --> 01:07:08,395
Little bumpski.
772
01:07:09,931 --> 01:07:11,733
Yeah, OK, sure I like cocaine.
773
01:07:13,768 --> 01:07:15,513
- Alright she's a part girl, I guess.
- Yeah, yeah, just be careful.
774
01:07:15,537 --> 01:07:18,438
Don't draw attention to it.
775
01:07:22,342 --> 01:07:24,044
Oh well, that'll put
hair on your chest.
776
01:07:24,177 --> 01:07:26,657
- Sure will.
- Just when I thought you couldn't get any cooler.
777
01:07:27,749 --> 01:07:28,616
Aww...
778
01:07:28,750 --> 01:07:31,786
You just snorted my dad's ashes.
779
01:07:35,557 --> 01:07:36,557
What?
780
01:07:36,624 --> 01:07:37,692
Mmmm.
781
01:07:37,825 --> 01:07:40,028
I said you just snorted
my dad's ashes,
782
01:07:40,160 --> 01:07:43,598
So that is what you said, right?
I'm not...
783
01:07:43,731 --> 01:07:46,901
Is that the joke name you call
cocaine, are you playing with me?
784
01:07:47,035 --> 01:07:48,736
No actual ashes.
785
01:07:50,404 --> 01:07:52,941
I got-'em from the crematorium.
786
01:07:53,073 --> 01:07:56,276
On Saint Clair Street.
- What the fuck are you talking about?
787
01:07:56,410 --> 01:07:57,712
Oh it's nothing.
788
01:07:57,845 --> 01:07:59,547
It's just that you snorted
my dad's ashes.
789
01:07:59,681 --> 01:08:01,148
That's not nothing, sweetheart,
790
01:08:01,281 --> 01:08:03,618
that's your daddy in my
throat right now.
791
01:08:03,751 --> 01:08:06,486
Dude, I feel that.
- Well that's so great.
792
01:08:06,621 --> 01:08:09,724
I'm so glad.
- It isn't that great.
793
01:08:09,857 --> 01:08:11,325
It sucks.
794
01:08:11,793 --> 01:08:13,393
You are so cute.
795
01:08:14,629 --> 01:08:16,296
Is your hair naturally curly?
796
01:08:16,430 --> 01:08:19,099
OK, you're a psycho, right?
797
01:08:19,701 --> 01:08:21,669
Psycho about you.
798
01:08:21,803 --> 01:08:23,270
Oh...
799
01:08:23,403 --> 01:08:24,739
That's so sweet.
800
01:08:27,508 --> 01:08:29,510
Yeah... Uh...
801
01:08:29,644 --> 01:08:32,112
Soon as we get that check!
- Yeah where is she?
802
01:08:42,957 --> 01:08:44,759
Ohh bowling could be fun.
803
01:08:44,892 --> 01:08:46,661
Oh my gosh,
we could get ice cream
804
01:08:46,794 --> 01:08:49,831
Oh my gosh Oh my gosh
I have to wake up early.
805
01:08:49,964 --> 01:08:51,465
I am remembering in the morning.
806
01:08:51,599 --> 01:08:53,635
- Oh no.
- Got that old shift.
807
01:08:53,768 --> 01:08:55,937
Ugh, that's the worst.
- Yup.
808
01:08:56,070 --> 01:08:58,616
Well, maybe Saturday night we could
do something if you're not doing anything.
809
01:08:58,640 --> 01:09:00,207
Maybe you know gonna
play by ear right?
810
01:09:00,340 --> 01:09:03,678
- Yeah.
- Yeah, alright, alright.
811
01:09:04,545 --> 01:09:06,981
Bye, I'll see you later.
812
01:09:07,347 --> 01:09:08,583
Bye!
813
01:09:09,917 --> 01:09:12,720
Excuse me, do you happen
to have a bookmark?
814
01:09:12,854 --> 01:09:13,721
Yup.
815
01:09:13,855 --> 01:09:16,924
But my name's not Mark it's Sam.
816
01:09:17,959 --> 01:09:19,259
OK.
817
01:09:28,002 --> 01:09:29,369
You want your milk in the bag?
818
01:09:29,503 --> 01:09:31,171
No, I think the carton
will be okay.
819
01:09:33,306 --> 01:09:39,312
Oh, I'm sorry,
that was awful, bags great.
820
01:09:41,281 --> 01:09:43,851
Would you like to try our new
"Java Rama" coffee fountain?
821
01:09:43,985 --> 01:09:45,787
It comes with five
different bold flavors that
822
01:09:45,920 --> 01:09:47,822
will make you start
the day like a savage.
823
01:09:47,955 --> 01:09:50,558
No, I think black's going to be
okay, but don't worry,
824
01:09:50,692 --> 01:09:53,061
I'm not driving or anything.
825
01:09:53,193 --> 01:09:54,796
Oh I did it again.
826
01:10:05,640 --> 01:10:07,875
What the fuck is this?
827
01:10:09,744 --> 01:10:11,211
Oh my...
828
01:10:12,146 --> 01:10:13,380
God!
829
01:10:19,954 --> 01:10:23,191
Ohhh you're gonna be alright
baby, you're gonna be okay.
830
01:10:23,323 --> 01:10:25,860
Everything's cool.
Get some Java going.
831
01:10:25,993 --> 01:10:26,993
What don't.
832
01:10:39,841 --> 01:10:40,875
No, Sir,
833
01:10:41,341 --> 01:10:43,511
no sir, no sir.
834
01:10:47,380 --> 01:10:48,916
On your ass, buddy.
835
01:10:49,050 --> 01:10:50,818
Ohhh.
836
01:10:52,086 --> 01:10:54,889
So we are not going that fast
not in this neighborhood.
837
01:10:55,022 --> 01:10:57,091
Not in this neighborhood.
Are you kidding me?
838
01:11:00,795 --> 01:11:03,363
What is he doing? Hold up,
I gotta film him.
839
01:11:06,701 --> 01:11:09,704
A little fast back
there ay boys?
840
01:11:09,837 --> 01:11:10,837
Huh?
841
01:11:10,872 --> 01:11:11,872
Where's the fire?
842
01:11:12,940 --> 01:11:14,742
He just, he stumbled!
843
01:11:17,712 --> 01:11:18,478
Hey.
844
01:11:18,613 --> 01:11:20,447
Tubby, what's up man?
845
01:11:20,581 --> 01:11:23,342
Hey smile for the camera! We
were going a little faster for you there?
846
01:11:25,052 --> 01:11:27,922
- Dude, check this guy out.
- There's kids around here.
847
01:11:28,055 --> 01:11:29,223
What's up man?
- Tubby.
848
01:11:29,356 --> 01:11:30,725
What's up?
849
01:11:30,892 --> 01:11:31,926
Hey!
850
01:11:32,093 --> 01:11:34,695
There's kids around here.
851
01:11:35,428 --> 01:11:36,463
There's kids around.
852
01:11:36,597 --> 01:11:37,799
Oh!
853
01:11:39,600 --> 01:11:41,145
Get up, there's kids around man.
854
01:11:41,169 --> 01:11:43,271
There's kids around.
It's kinda weird though.
855
01:11:50,878 --> 01:11:54,649
You've reached Tina and Dad
leave a message.
856
01:11:56,117 --> 01:11:59,787
Hey, uh, look who's still
not picking up.
857
01:12:00,922 --> 01:12:06,060
Really wish you would have told me
about the side effects of this shit, hmm.
858
01:12:06,194 --> 01:12:08,062
Anyway, guess you found
your fucking address.
859
01:12:08,196 --> 01:12:09,396
I'm on my way.
860
01:12:45,933 --> 01:12:47,835
Honey, I'm home.
861
01:13:05,418 --> 01:13:08,756
I look like Ben
fucking Franklin.
862
01:14:06,446 --> 01:14:07,782
Hey.
863
01:14:08,749 --> 01:14:10,450
What the fuck?
864
01:14:11,218 --> 01:14:12,452
Hmm.
865
01:14:17,591 --> 01:14:21,762
I think I just asked you
a question, Missy.
866
01:14:25,433 --> 01:14:27,268
Daddy, you're home early.
867
01:14:27,401 --> 01:14:30,604
Yeah, well we finished up early
wrapped up and the ball said-
868
01:14:32,540 --> 01:14:34,575
My God help me please!
869
01:14:34,809 --> 01:14:36,444
God it's hot here, you hot?
870
01:14:36,577 --> 01:14:38,956
How many times I'm going to say
it don't touch the thermostat
871
01:14:38,980 --> 01:14:41,282
we're not heating the whole
neighborhood here, okay?
872
01:14:41,415 --> 01:14:42,883
Dad!
873
01:14:43,250 --> 01:14:46,787
But I'm chilly!
- Hey there chilly, I'm dad. God, help me!
874
01:14:51,125 --> 01:14:52,560
You're so funny.
875
01:14:52,693 --> 01:14:55,196
You got to start answering some
questions, OK? Cause I'm...
876
01:14:55,329 --> 01:14:57,999
You know, I've lost it fully and
and I just would really like to
877
01:14:58,132 --> 01:15:02,169
counteract whatever the fuck's
going on with me right now and.
878
01:15:02,303 --> 01:15:03,637
Oh.
879
01:15:07,308 --> 01:15:08,776
Go to your room.
880
01:15:11,212 --> 01:15:12,380
Now.
881
01:15:12,813 --> 01:15:13,914
Get to steppin' sister.
882
01:15:14,048 --> 01:15:15,616
I'm not playing with you
this time.
883
01:15:15,750 --> 01:15:16,984
So unfair!
884
01:15:17,752 --> 01:15:19,920
I didn't do anything.
885
01:15:34,435 --> 01:15:36,237
Yeah, like that.
886
01:16:19,713 --> 01:16:21,882
It's our song Daddy!
887
01:16:23,451 --> 01:16:24,852
Fuck this!
888
01:18:02,449 --> 01:18:03,984
Good God.
889
01:18:10,424 --> 01:18:11,560
Hey.
890
01:18:12,126 --> 01:18:14,461
Hey daddy!
891
01:18:14,663 --> 01:18:15,863
Hey.
892
01:18:16,263 --> 01:18:19,767
Nice set up y'all.
I dig the titties.
893
01:18:20,034 --> 01:18:21,936
Thanks daddy.
894
01:18:22,069 --> 01:18:23,904
Let's get an apron on that boy.
895
01:18:25,674 --> 01:18:26,674
I like this one.
896
01:18:26,740 --> 01:18:28,976
He's going to be good.
897
01:19:19,026 --> 01:19:20,695
That was fun.
61175
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.