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ANNOUNCER: The Dick Van Dyke Show.
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Starring Dick Van Dyke, Rose Marie, Morey Amsterdam, Larry
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Matthews, and Mary Tyler Moore.
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All right, next contestant.
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Why don't we get this introduction written
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and get out of here?
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No sense in writing an introduction.
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We don't even know what guest star
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we're going to be introducing.
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Why don't we just write one of those all purpose
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introductions?
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You know, I'd like you all to meet one of the truly great
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performers in our business.
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A man with great talent and charm, second only to mine.
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Ladies and gentlemen, how about a big round of applause
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for Mr. Potato Head.
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What do you want Fatso?
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Yuck.
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Rob, Sally, I've got wonderful news.
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Don't tell us you've got us a guest star.
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Not just a guest star.
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I got I love to love, to love, to love.
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You've got a cold in your nose.
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That's what you got.
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Mel, you mean you've Jacques Savon, the French Sinatra?
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That's exactly who I got!
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Jacques Savon.
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Jacques Savon?
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How'd you get him hard-head?
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Everybody in town is trying to get Jacques Savon.
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What time will he get here?
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Very soon.
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Rob, I must say you're not very enthused about it.
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Oh, it's not that I don't think he's great, Mel.
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It's just that, well he's got a French accent
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and I had an idea for a cowboy sketch.
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Well get a fresh idea.
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Well, I've got to go meet Jacques.
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Boy, that's going to be a big thrill for Jacques.
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Hey Rob, what's the matter with you?
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You act like you're not thrilled that Jacques Savon
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is going to be on the show.
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Oh, I think it's great he's going to be on the show.
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It's just that I've got to get out
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of here before he gets here.
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Why?
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I just don't want to see old Jacques.
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That's all.
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What do you mean old Jacques?
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You mean you know the guy?
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Oh yeah.
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Laura and I met him years ago in Europe.
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When we took that trip, he was just getting started then.
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What happened?
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What'd he do to you?
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It's not what he did to me, it's what I did to him.
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All right, what'd you do to him?
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I broke up his marriage.
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You what?
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I said I broke up his marriage.
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Laura and I met Jacques and his wife Yvette
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in this little town in the south of France on our trip
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to Europe.
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We four became very good friends.
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And one day I don't even remember where Laura was,
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but I went shopping with Yvette.
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And right in this little antique shop, all of a sudden,
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she tells me that she has flipped for me.
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That I am the fellow who can make her happy.
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You mean, she's married to Jacques Savon
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and she flipped for you?
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Hey Rob, look.
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You're very talented and lovable and very handsome.
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But I don't believe either.
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It's true.
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I read later they got a divorce and the word was around
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it was because of some American.
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Well how do you know you were the American?
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Well the people kind of hinted about it.
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Yeah?
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Hey, what's this Yvette look like?
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Oh, gosh.
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It's been so long ago I don't even remember.
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She was short.
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5'3 1/4 I guess.
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Blonde, green eyes.
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Thick black eyelashes.
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And when she smiles, she only had a dimple on her right side.
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And when she laughed, her nose would quiver.
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No, you don't remember her at all.
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What did you say to Yvette when she told
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you that you were so desirable?
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Well, the truth.
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I told her I was flattered about it,
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but that I was very happily married and forget it.
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But what did Laura say?
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Did she know?
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I think she has a suspicion about it because she never ever
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mentions that part of the trip.
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And I'm not going to tell her about it.
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Look, I'm getting out of here.
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Would you guys make up any kind of excuse for Mel?
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Jacques, this is the writers' room.
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Come on in to meet them.
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Rob, Sally, Jacques Savon.
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Rob, very nice to meet you.
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How are you? - Hi.
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That isn't--
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That isn't very nice.
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You should always introduce the lady first.
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Oh, oh, excuse me.
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Sally Rogers.
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That's Miss Sally Rogers.
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Just in case you keep a card file.
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I never forget such information.
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You, eat your heart out.
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Where is our esteemed colleague?
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Why, he'll be back after lunch.
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Oh, that's too bad.
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He's our head writer, and I hoped we could
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meet him before we got started.
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Can't we start without him?
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Well I suppose so.
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We can pick the song you're going to sing.
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Good, what would you like?
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Novelty?
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Or love songs?
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Anything but Frere Jacques.
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Why don't you just stand there and talk?
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Maybe we should go to the rehearsal hall anyway.
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I have to move around when I sing.
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You know? - Why?
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To distract my voice.
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Yeah, that's a good idea.
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Let's go to the rehearsal hall. Come on Mel.
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All right Jacques.
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Rehearsal hall.
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Someone leave word for Rob to look
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us up in the rehearsal hall.
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Oh, yes your baldness.
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Rob.
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I thought you were Rob.
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No, no, I'm Buddy Sorrell. Hi.
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Oh, I'm sorry.
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All right, what do you say we go to the rehearsal hall?
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Come on.
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Let's go.
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Robert Petrie!
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Where? Where?
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Where?
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- Here, on the door. - Oh.
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Oh. - Yes, yes, so it is.
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Yeah.
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I know his name.
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Well everybody does.
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He's a big television writer.
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Very big.
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I wonder if he's the same Robert Petrie.
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Oh no, entirely different.
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I met a Robert Petrie years ago.
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A little short bald guy with big glasses?
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No, no, no, tall, thin, a lot of smiling teeth.
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That's Rob.
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Was very good friends with my wife Yvette and myself.
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His wife was Laura.
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That's our Rob.
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Well, enough of this old hallway stuff.
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Let's go hear some French singing.
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Huh? Come on.
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Robert Petrie. Yes.
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When he comes back, tell him I want to see him.
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Yeah, yeah, sure.
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I'll write it down.
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Don't forget.
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I won't forget!
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Buddy?
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Yes?
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Tell him I want very much to discuss something with him.
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You want to discuss something with him.
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Very much.
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Well, did you hear what Frenchie said?
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He wants to discuss something with you.
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You know what he wants to discuss?
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A choice of weapons.
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MILLIE: Laura, you home?
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Yeah, in here, Millie.
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Hi, I make peanut butter cookies.
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I know how much Rob likes them.
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Thank you.
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Expecting company?
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Yeah, Buddy and Sally have to work late tonight
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so Rob's bringing them home for dinner.
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Oh.
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[interposing voices]
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Hello.
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Hi Laura.
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[interposing voices]
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Homemade cookies!
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Hiya Mil!
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Hey, my favorite!
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Food.
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Hey, how come you had to work tonight?
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We didn't know until this afternoon
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who our guest star was.
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Who you got?
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Who's that guy? Oh.
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Jacques Savon.
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Jacques Savon?
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You got Jacques Savon on the show?
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Laura, they got Jacques Savon on the show.
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Isn't that wonderful?
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Yeah, that's wonderful.
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Rob, I want tickets this week.
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Well tickets for the show may be hard to get Mil.
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Well besides the show I want tickets for his rehearsals,
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and his lunch breaks, and his wardrobe fittings,
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and whatever else he's got on schedule.
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Sally, what's he like?
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SALLY: What's he like?
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Well, he's--
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Well he's taller and handsomer than I am, but don't
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forget I'm shorter and dumpier.
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Dinner ready?
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Yeah, I just have to put the spaghetti on.
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No-- no hurry. No hurry.
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Look you guys, why don't we go in the den
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and get started working?
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Laura, hey Laura.
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Laura, listen.
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A little spaghetti lots of sauce.
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I'm on a diet.
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Lots of spaghetti and lots of sauce for me.
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I'm on a diet too, but I'm weak.
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Laura?
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Yeah?
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You're not doing this right.
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The celery goes on the left and the spoon
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and the carrots go on the right.
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Where's my head?
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Is something the matter?
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Frankly, yes, but it's nothing I can discuss.
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Laura, remember me?
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I'm your best friend.
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There's nothing you can't tell me.
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Think of me like a doctor.
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Millie, please.
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It's not something shocking, is it Laura?
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Is it?
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Well--
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It is.
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Well you can't shock me.
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I'm like a doctor.
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Go on, try. Say anything.
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Oh, Millie.
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Well what is it?
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Would you tell me?
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Well it's nothing.
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It's just that I don't want to have
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to see Jacques Savon again.
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Again?
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You mean you know him personally?
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Yes, we met in Europe.
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Well what did he do to you?
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Insult you or something?
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Well, no.
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It's just that--
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What is it?
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Well I don't want to have to see
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him again because I'm the one who broke up his marriage.
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You dropped your cookie, doctor.
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You live right next door to a person,
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you see them every day, taking out the garbage
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00:08:45,791 --> 00:08:48,628
and mopping the floor, and you think you them.
274
00:08:48,728 --> 00:08:49,695
How did it happen?
275
00:08:49,795 --> 00:08:52,698
Well it was nothing, really.
276
00:08:52,798 --> 00:08:55,935
I mean, it was all quite innocent on my part.
277
00:08:56,035 --> 00:08:57,136
Yeah, yeah?
278
00:08:57,236 --> 00:09:00,239
It's just that-- well, he said some things to me.
279
00:09:00,339 --> 00:09:01,607
Well, what kind of things?
280
00:09:01,707 --> 00:09:04,243
What kind of things did he say?
281
00:09:04,343 --> 00:09:06,212
Romantic things.
282
00:09:06,312 --> 00:09:07,813
Beautiful things.
283
00:09:07,914 --> 00:09:09,315
The kind of things a man shouldn't
284
00:09:09,415 --> 00:09:11,350
say to another man's wife.
285
00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:13,552
Well did he say he liked you?
286
00:09:13,653 --> 00:09:15,588
Did he say he liked you very much?
287
00:09:15,688 --> 00:09:18,624
Did he say he loved you?
288
00:09:18,724 --> 00:09:23,095
He said Laura I love you in that beautiful accent.
289
00:09:23,195 --> 00:09:25,765
Oh, I'm dying.
290
00:09:25,865 --> 00:09:28,501
Mill, he didn't say it in those words.
291
00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:30,836
In French?
292
00:09:30,937 --> 00:09:32,204
Listen.
293
00:09:32,305 --> 00:09:34,840
I'll show you something if you promise never to say a word.
294
00:09:34,941 --> 00:09:39,011
You can cut off my arms and legs and throw me off a cliff.
295
00:09:39,111 --> 00:09:40,613
Fine.
296
00:09:40,713 --> 00:09:41,647
What is it?
297
00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:42,581
What are you going to show me?
298
00:09:42,682 --> 00:09:44,150
Just wait a minute.
299
00:09:44,250 --> 00:09:45,151
I'll be right back.
300
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:46,519
What am I going to see?
301
00:09:46,619 --> 00:09:47,820
I'm dying!
302
00:09:47,920 --> 00:09:50,523
It happened in this little town in France.
303
00:09:50,623 --> 00:09:52,124
I don't know where Rob was that day.
304
00:09:52,224 --> 00:09:53,659
I think he was somewhere with Yvette.
305
00:09:53,759 --> 00:09:55,061
That's Jacques' wife.
306
00:09:55,161 --> 00:09:57,730
He sent her shopping so he could be alone with me.
307
00:09:57,830 --> 00:09:59,932
Oh, the devil.
308
00:10:00,032 --> 00:10:03,102
And while we were having coffee in this little cafe,
309
00:10:03,202 --> 00:10:06,505
he gave this to me.
310
00:10:06,605 --> 00:10:08,774
A lump of sugar.
311
00:10:11,077 --> 00:10:13,412
And when he gave it to me, you know what he said?
312
00:10:13,512 --> 00:10:14,347
What?
313
00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:15,514
What?
314
00:10:15,614 --> 00:10:16,983
He said were this sugar as sweet
315
00:10:17,083 --> 00:10:19,952
as thou, one cube could sweeten all the coffee in all
316
00:10:20,052 --> 00:10:21,187
the cups of the continent.
317
00:10:21,287 --> 00:10:23,122
Did he say that?
318
00:10:23,222 --> 00:10:26,792
Then he said if only I weren't married to Yvette.
319
00:10:26,892 --> 00:10:28,527
Did he say that?
320
00:10:28,627 --> 00:10:30,529
You keep asking did he say that.
321
00:10:30,629 --> 00:10:31,998
Of course he said it.
322
00:10:32,098 --> 00:10:34,867
Why do you think I'm so upset that he's on Rob's show?
323
00:10:34,967 --> 00:10:37,670
Laura, you know what you are?
324
00:10:37,770 --> 00:10:39,105
You're deep.
325
00:10:39,205 --> 00:10:41,273
That's what you are.
326
00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:44,176
You are deep.
327
00:10:44,276 --> 00:10:45,711
Hey Laura, you got any coffee ready?
328
00:10:45,811 --> 00:10:47,546
I don't think I can last till spaghetti time.
329
00:10:47,646 --> 00:10:48,714
Oh, yeah Sally.
330
00:10:48,814 --> 00:10:50,016
There's some in the kitchen. - Oh.
331
00:10:50,116 --> 00:10:51,517
Be right back. - Thanks.
332
00:10:51,617 --> 00:10:52,752
Millie?
333
00:10:54,620 --> 00:10:55,688
What's the matter Millie?
334
00:10:55,788 --> 00:10:57,089
You look like you're in a trance.
335
00:10:57,189 --> 00:10:59,658
Well, Laura was just saying some things to me.
336
00:10:59,759 --> 00:11:01,594
And well, just don't ask.
337
00:11:01,694 --> 00:11:03,295
Just don't ask.
338
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:04,864
What do you mean don't ask?
339
00:11:04,964 --> 00:11:06,899
If you don't want me to ask, you should never say don't ask.
340
00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:08,501
Well it's just too shocking.
341
00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,402
That's all.
342
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:10,469
It's just too shocking.
343
00:11:10,569 --> 00:11:11,871
All right that settles it.
344
00:11:11,971 --> 00:11:14,206
If you don't tell me, I'm going to break your arm.
345
00:11:14,306 --> 00:11:15,608
Come on, I'm going to break your arm.
346
00:11:15,708 --> 00:11:16,809
Here we go Sally.
347
00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:20,212
Oh, oh, thank you very much, Laura.
348
00:11:20,312 --> 00:11:21,947
Don't use the sugar!
349
00:11:22,048 --> 00:11:23,816
I won't use the sugar!
350
00:11:26,552 --> 00:11:27,787
What's the matter?
351
00:11:27,887 --> 00:11:29,422
Is it poisoned?
352
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,756
Don't touch it.
353
00:11:30,856 --> 00:11:32,558
I hope you have it insured.
354
00:11:32,658 --> 00:11:35,194
What is it?
355
00:11:35,294 --> 00:11:36,829
Laura, let me tell her.
356
00:11:36,929 --> 00:11:38,264
Let me tell her about the sugar.
357
00:11:38,364 --> 00:11:40,666
I thought you were so good at keeping secrets.
358
00:11:40,766 --> 00:11:42,568
Well I am, but so is Sally.
359
00:11:42,668 --> 00:11:43,869
Aren't you Sally?
360
00:11:43,969 --> 00:11:45,571
I bet they could cut off your arms and legs
361
00:11:45,671 --> 00:11:46,739
and throw you off a cliff.
362
00:11:46,839 --> 00:11:47,673
Yeah, they did and I never talked.
363
00:11:47,773 --> 00:11:49,075
Now what is it?
364
00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:50,009
It's nothing.
365
00:11:50,109 --> 00:11:50,709
Really.
366
00:11:50,810 --> 00:11:51,944
Nothing?
367
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:53,345
Did you see that sugar?
368
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:54,380
For a second.
369
00:11:57,383 --> 00:11:57,983
Embarrassing.
370
00:11:58,084 --> 00:12:00,152
Well, I'll whisper it.
371
00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:07,259
In French?
372
00:12:07,359 --> 00:12:09,361
Jacques Savon?
373
00:12:09,462 --> 00:12:12,598
She deep.
374
00:12:12,698 --> 00:12:17,036
You are so deep.
375
00:12:17,136 --> 00:12:19,705
Laura, you mean you're the one responsible?
376
00:12:19,805 --> 00:12:21,807
I'm afraid so.
377
00:12:21,907 --> 00:12:23,375
Does Rob know?
378
00:12:23,476 --> 00:12:26,545
Well, he must have suspected something Sally, because we
379
00:12:26,645 --> 00:12:28,247
just never discuss it.
380
00:12:28,347 --> 00:12:30,883
Well, maybe you ought to tell him.
381
00:12:30,983 --> 00:12:32,151
Yeah, you're right.
382
00:12:32,251 --> 00:12:35,754
I don't like to keep a secret like this.
383
00:12:35,855 --> 00:12:37,857
Maybe I'll tell him tonight.
384
00:12:37,957 --> 00:12:40,092
Maybe I'll bring it up casually.
385
00:12:52,538 --> 00:12:54,807
[clearing throat]
386
00:12:54,907 --> 00:12:57,009
Um, Rob?
387
00:12:57,109 --> 00:12:59,612
How come you didn't tell me about Jacques
388
00:12:59,712 --> 00:13:01,113
being on the show?
389
00:13:01,213 --> 00:13:02,314
Huh?
390
00:13:02,414 --> 00:13:05,251
Well-- we didn't know till this afternoon, honey.
391
00:13:08,888 --> 00:13:10,089
How does he look?
392
00:13:10,189 --> 00:13:11,090
Jacques?
393
00:13:11,190 --> 00:13:13,092
Well, I didn't get to see him.
394
00:13:13,192 --> 00:13:15,327
We sort of missed each other all day.
395
00:13:17,830 --> 00:13:20,332
Do you think he remembers us?
396
00:13:20,432 --> 00:13:22,434
Oh, I don't know.
397
00:13:22,535 --> 00:13:25,871
I kind of doubt it.
398
00:13:25,971 --> 00:13:28,974
I wonder whatever happened to his wife.
399
00:13:29,074 --> 00:13:29,909
What was her name?
400
00:13:30,009 --> 00:13:31,810
Oh, yeah, short girl.
401
00:13:31,911 --> 00:13:32,711
What was her name?
402
00:13:32,811 --> 00:13:33,679
Babette?
403
00:13:33,779 --> 00:13:35,414
Yvette? - Yvette.
404
00:13:35,514 --> 00:13:36,315
Yeah, that's it.
405
00:13:36,415 --> 00:13:37,449
Yvette.
406
00:13:37,550 --> 00:13:39,285
I don't-- I don't know what happened to her.
407
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:42,188
They-- they got divorced, didn't they?
408
00:13:42,288 --> 00:13:46,725
Yeah, I remember reading something about that.
409
00:13:46,825 --> 00:13:48,761
I wonder what went wrong.
410
00:13:48,861 --> 00:13:50,996
Well, I don't know.
411
00:13:51,096 --> 00:13:53,532
Maybe one of them fell in love with somebody else.
412
00:13:53,632 --> 00:13:56,202
Why do you say that?
413
00:13:56,302 --> 00:13:57,870
No-- no reason.
414
00:13:57,970 --> 00:13:59,772
You know, French people are--
415
00:13:59,872 --> 00:14:01,941
they're emotional.
416
00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:05,144
You think Jacques fell in love with another woman?
417
00:14:05,244 --> 00:14:06,579
Yeah. Yeah, could have been.
418
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:07,513
Could have been that.
419
00:14:07,613 --> 00:14:09,582
Yeah, could have been.
420
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:12,251
Of course, it's possible that--
421
00:14:12,351 --> 00:14:13,452
what's her name? LAURA: Yvette.
422
00:14:13,552 --> 00:14:15,087
Yvette. Yeah.
423
00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:18,357
Might be that Yvette fell for some other guy.
424
00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:19,758
Really?
425
00:14:19,858 --> 00:14:21,961
She seemed devoted to Jacques.
426
00:14:22,061 --> 00:14:24,463
Oh, well Jacques was wild about her too honey.
427
00:14:24,563 --> 00:14:29,101
He'd be crazy to leave a girl like Yvette for anybody.
428
00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,135
Oh?
429
00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:31,237
Did you think she was that attractive?
430
00:14:31,337 --> 00:14:31,971
Oh, no!
431
00:14:32,071 --> 00:14:33,105
She was short.
432
00:14:33,205 --> 00:14:34,840
Pudgy.
433
00:14:34,940 --> 00:14:36,342
Pudgy?
434
00:14:36,442 --> 00:14:40,012
I thought she had a great figure and a beautiful face.
435
00:14:40,112 --> 00:14:41,880
Probably just that he found somebody else
436
00:14:41,981 --> 00:14:44,383
he was more attracted to.
437
00:14:44,483 --> 00:14:49,922
Yeah, or-- she found maybe somebody who was more her type.
438
00:14:50,022 --> 00:14:51,123
Possibly.
439
00:14:54,660 --> 00:14:55,527
OK.
440
00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:57,429
Music out and we finish.
441
00:14:57,529 --> 00:14:58,631
Good, good, good.
442
00:14:58,731 --> 00:14:59,565
Hey Buddy.
443
00:14:59,665 --> 00:15:01,133
How about that?
444
00:15:01,233 --> 00:15:03,902
Rob and Laura both think they broke up Jacques' marriage.
445
00:15:04,003 --> 00:15:05,037
Yeah.
446
00:15:05,137 --> 00:15:06,572
Funny thing, after all these years
447
00:15:06,672 --> 00:15:09,375
that neither one of them--
448
00:15:09,475 --> 00:15:10,442
Robert? Robert?
449
00:15:10,542 --> 00:15:11,377
Oh, hi, Jacques.
450
00:15:11,477 --> 00:15:12,144
He's not here.
451
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:13,412
What is it with this man?
452
00:15:13,512 --> 00:15:15,748
I've tried to see him four times today.
453
00:15:15,848 --> 00:15:18,217
Jacques, if you have a minute, we'd
454
00:15:18,317 --> 00:15:20,252
like to talk to you, please.
455
00:15:20,352 --> 00:15:21,320
What is it?
456
00:15:21,420 --> 00:15:22,988
Do you think it's fair to make Rob feel
457
00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:24,556
guilty after all these years?
458
00:15:24,657 --> 00:15:26,992
I mean, it wasn't his fault that Yvette had a roving eye.
459
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:29,728
Are you trying to say that Robert and Yvette--
460
00:15:29,828 --> 00:15:31,864
Yeah, he he told us all about it.
461
00:15:31,964 --> 00:15:34,566
And according to Laura, boy, you were pretty good yourself Jake.
462
00:15:34,667 --> 00:15:35,501
Jacques.
463
00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:36,502
Jacques.
464
00:15:39,271 --> 00:15:41,373
Now wait-- wait a minute now.
465
00:15:41,473 --> 00:15:44,243
Now you say that Robert thinks he
466
00:15:44,343 --> 00:15:46,545
came between Yvette and myself?
467
00:15:46,645 --> 00:15:48,113
And Laura--
468
00:15:48,213 --> 00:15:50,582
Yeah, thinks she's the one responsible for your marriage
469
00:15:50,683 --> 00:15:51,617
collapsing.
470
00:15:51,717 --> 00:15:52,951
Ridiculous.
471
00:15:53,052 --> 00:15:54,520
They did not come between Yvette and myself.
472
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:55,654
Neither one of them?
473
00:15:55,754 --> 00:15:56,989
Of course not.
474
00:15:57,089 --> 00:15:59,024
The thing that broke up my marriage with Yvette
475
00:15:59,124 --> 00:16:05,230
was a great and powerful mutual hatred for each other.
476
00:16:05,331 --> 00:16:07,399
Oh, it was beautiful.
477
00:16:07,499 --> 00:16:09,968
Jacques, did you give Laura a lump a sugar?
478
00:16:10,069 --> 00:16:11,637
A lump of--
479
00:16:11,737 --> 00:16:12,905
Oh my.
480
00:16:13,005 --> 00:16:16,342
I haven't had a sugar beet in years.
481
00:16:16,442 --> 00:16:17,643
Sugar beet?
482
00:16:17,743 --> 00:16:18,677
Of course.
483
00:16:18,777 --> 00:16:20,346
What about Yvette and Robert?
484
00:16:20,446 --> 00:16:21,613
You Americans.
485
00:16:21,714 --> 00:16:23,749
You are so romantic.
486
00:16:23,849 --> 00:16:27,353
Someone looks cockeyed at you, and immediately you
487
00:16:27,453 --> 00:16:28,587
think it's love.
488
00:16:28,687 --> 00:16:31,790
Well, I make the passing fun with every woman I meet.
489
00:16:31,890 --> 00:16:33,225
You haven't with me.
490
00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:33,926
Wait.
491
00:16:34,026 --> 00:16:34,893
The day is young.
492
00:16:34,993 --> 00:16:36,195
Well, I'm not, let's go.
493
00:16:39,164 --> 00:16:42,901
No, Yvette was very flirtatious.
494
00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:45,003
That was one of our major problems.
495
00:16:45,104 --> 00:16:46,305
Well look, Jacques.
496
00:16:46,405 --> 00:16:48,107
Why don't you tell Rob and Laura the truth
497
00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:49,408
and make them both happy?
498
00:16:49,508 --> 00:16:51,577
No, I think it would make them miserable.
499
00:16:51,677 --> 00:16:53,312
You mean you're not going to tell them?
500
00:16:53,412 --> 00:16:54,646
No.
501
00:16:54,747 --> 00:16:56,248
Why not?
502
00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:59,818
Well, Laura is a happily married woman.
503
00:16:59,918 --> 00:17:02,521
But she is a woman.
504
00:17:02,621 --> 00:17:05,491
Every woman has some secret memory.
505
00:17:05,591 --> 00:17:08,494
A memory that keeps her heart yearning and her soul
506
00:17:08,594 --> 00:17:09,928
warm on cold nights.
507
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:11,063
Is it so?
508
00:17:11,163 --> 00:17:14,433
It is so.
509
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:16,268
I being a man.
510
00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:17,636
Oh, I'll buy that.
511
00:17:20,339 --> 00:17:23,509
I know that men need their illusions, too.
512
00:17:23,609 --> 00:17:26,612
No man would like to discover to the attention
513
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:30,716
that a beautiful woman once gave him was just the same attention
514
00:17:30,816 --> 00:17:32,751
she gave with every man.
515
00:17:32,851 --> 00:17:33,886
Right, Buddy?
516
00:17:33,986 --> 00:17:36,622
Yeah, don't take away my dreams.
517
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:40,125
After all, the government took everything else.
518
00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:42,161
Hey, how come you know so much about people?
519
00:17:42,261 --> 00:17:43,595
I am a people.
520
00:17:43,695 --> 00:17:44,930
Right, you're people.
521
00:17:45,030 --> 00:17:46,598
Yeah, but neither one of them knows about the other one.
522
00:17:46,698 --> 00:17:48,200
How are you going to keep it that way?
523
00:17:48,300 --> 00:17:49,735
That's right, that is a challenge.
524
00:17:49,835 --> 00:17:50,769
Oh, you sad it.
525
00:17:50,869 --> 00:17:52,237
But I love a challenge.
526
00:17:52,337 --> 00:17:53,772
Yeah, well stick around friend.
527
00:17:53,872 --> 00:17:55,607
I think you got a challenge coming up here in a minute.
528
00:17:55,707 --> 00:17:56,809
Yeah, that's right.
529
00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:58,177
Laura is going to come back to pick up her shoes.
530
00:17:58,277 --> 00:17:59,078
Come on, what are we waiting for?
531
00:17:59,178 --> 00:18:00,212
Let's get out of here.
532
00:18:00,312 --> 00:18:00,979
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right.
533
00:18:01,080 --> 00:18:02,181
You're right.
534
00:18:02,281 --> 00:18:03,482
Boy, I sure would like to know what
535
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:04,316
you're going to say to them. - Yeah, me too.
536
00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:06,618
Me too.
537
00:18:06,718 --> 00:18:11,757
SALLY: Thanks, Laura, I think I left them in the office.
538
00:18:11,857 --> 00:18:13,459
[gasp] - Jacques.
539
00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:14,493
Laura.
540
00:18:17,062 --> 00:18:18,964
Oh.
541
00:18:19,064 --> 00:18:20,199
Uh.
542
00:18:23,168 --> 00:18:24,403
Rob will be here in a minute.
543
00:18:24,503 --> 00:18:26,104
Laura, let me look at you.
544
00:18:26,205 --> 00:18:27,573
Why?
545
00:18:27,673 --> 00:18:29,775
I mean, couldn't you look at me from over there?
546
00:18:29,875 --> 00:18:32,044
Laura.
547
00:18:32,144 --> 00:18:32,978
Do you know something?
548
00:18:33,078 --> 00:18:34,046
What?
549
00:18:34,146 --> 00:18:35,481
Uh, Jacques.
550
00:18:35,581 --> 00:18:37,082
I just bought some new shoes. They were one sale.
551
00:18:37,182 --> 00:18:38,784
Aren't they beautiful? - Yes, wonderful.
552
00:18:38,884 --> 00:18:39,718
They're lovely.
553
00:18:39,818 --> 00:18:41,386
Beautiful, yes.
554
00:18:41,487 --> 00:18:42,521
Laura.
555
00:18:42,621 --> 00:18:45,090
You look even more beautiful than I remember.
556
00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:46,225
Oh, Jacques.
557
00:18:46,325 --> 00:18:47,659
Now don't start that kind of talk.
558
00:18:47,759 --> 00:18:48,360
That what?
559
00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:49,561
That kind of talk.
560
00:18:49,661 --> 00:18:51,296
Jacques, I'm a happily married woman.
561
00:18:51,396 --> 00:18:54,299
Oh, you don't know how happily married I am.
562
00:18:54,399 --> 00:18:56,935
It's just so wonderful.
563
00:18:57,035 --> 00:18:58,670
Now you sit down.
564
00:18:58,770 --> 00:18:59,972
Calm yourself.
565
00:19:00,072 --> 00:19:02,908
I want to talk to you about something very important.
566
00:19:05,844 --> 00:19:06,812
Rob!
567
00:19:16,955 --> 00:19:18,957
Hi Jacques.
568
00:19:19,057 --> 00:19:22,594
Robert Petrie.
569
00:19:22,694 --> 00:19:23,395
At last!
570
00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:25,797
Well, Jacques Savon.
571
00:19:25,898 --> 00:19:27,666
Boy, oh boy.
572
00:19:27,766 --> 00:19:28,700
Como esta usted?
573
00:19:34,139 --> 00:19:35,807
What's-- what's doing, Jacques?
574
00:19:35,908 --> 00:19:39,411
Well I was just telling your beautiful Laura
575
00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:40,779
how beautiful she is.
576
00:19:40,879 --> 00:19:42,247
She's beautiful, isn't she? - Beautiful.
577
00:19:42,347 --> 00:19:43,482
Very nice look.
578
00:19:46,952 --> 00:19:51,557
Now would you say she's as beautiful as Yvette used to be?
579
00:19:51,657 --> 00:19:56,128
Well-- you kind of put me on the spot there Jacques.
580
00:19:56,228 --> 00:19:57,963
I understand.
581
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:08,907
[nervous laughter]
582
00:20:09,007 --> 00:20:11,376
Well it's been a long, long time.
583
00:20:11,476 --> 00:20:13,111
It's been a long time.
584
00:20:13,211 --> 00:20:14,680
Let's not make it so long. Let's go.
585
00:20:14,780 --> 00:20:15,747
All right darling.
586
00:20:15,847 --> 00:20:19,618
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
587
00:20:19,718 --> 00:20:20,752
Wait.
588
00:20:20,852 --> 00:20:22,988
I haven't even asked you how you are.
589
00:20:23,088 --> 00:20:23,922
How are you?
590
00:20:24,022 --> 00:20:25,524
Oh, very happy Jacques.
591
00:20:25,624 --> 00:20:27,626
And very happily married.
592
00:20:27,726 --> 00:20:28,393
Yeah.
593
00:20:28,493 --> 00:20:29,995
We have a little boy.
594
00:20:30,095 --> 00:20:31,163
- Yes. - Together?
595
00:20:31,263 --> 00:20:32,097
Yes.
596
00:20:32,197 --> 00:20:33,365
Together.
597
00:20:33,465 --> 00:20:35,234
He goes to school.
598
00:20:35,334 --> 00:20:37,169
Oh, well, hey, it's getting dark out.
599
00:20:37,269 --> 00:20:38,203
We better go honey.
600
00:20:38,303 --> 00:20:39,137
Nice to see you Jacques.
601
00:20:39,237 --> 00:20:42,107
No, wait, please.
602
00:20:42,207 --> 00:20:43,041
Please.
603
00:20:43,141 --> 00:20:44,509
Rob.
604
00:20:44,610 --> 00:20:45,844
Give me a little moment.
605
00:20:45,944 --> 00:20:48,880
What are you going to do with a little moment?
606
00:20:48,981 --> 00:20:52,351
I would like to talk to you about my divorce from Yvette.
607
00:20:52,451 --> 00:20:53,652
Now come on.
608
00:20:53,752 --> 00:20:54,353
Come on.
609
00:20:54,453 --> 00:20:55,621
Both of you.
610
00:20:59,224 --> 00:21:00,659
You're divorced?
611
00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:03,528
It's none of our business, really, Jacques.
612
00:21:03,629 --> 00:21:05,697
Yes, I think the less said about it, the better.
613
00:21:05,797 --> 00:21:06,999
No, no, no, my friends. No, no.
614
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,166
No, no.
615
00:21:08,266 --> 00:21:09,668
Now you heard at the time there were
616
00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:13,438
some rumors about another person who was close to me.
617
00:21:13,538 --> 00:21:14,339
Did you hear about that?
618
00:21:14,439 --> 00:21:15,307
Well I--
619
00:21:15,407 --> 00:21:18,410
I-- did I hear about that?
620
00:21:18,510 --> 00:21:21,880
I don't-- why, I heard maybe a little bit about it.
621
00:21:21,980 --> 00:21:22,781
Un petit peu?
622
00:21:22,881 --> 00:21:24,883
Un petit peu, yeah.
623
00:21:24,983 --> 00:21:29,121
Well actually it was more than just a rumor.
624
00:21:29,221 --> 00:21:31,723
You see, there was this person.
625
00:21:31,823 --> 00:21:34,226
This American.
626
00:21:34,326 --> 00:21:36,795
And this American, they say without knowing,
627
00:21:36,895 --> 00:21:40,565
merely by existing, came between Yvette and myself.
628
00:21:40,666 --> 00:21:42,968
Oh boy, that's-- that's awful.
629
00:21:43,068 --> 00:21:44,036
Terrible.
630
00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:45,070
Just terrible.
631
00:21:48,306 --> 00:21:52,978
I felt very strongly about this American.
632
00:21:53,078 --> 00:21:55,814
Very strongly.
633
00:21:55,914 --> 00:21:57,716
Because without knowing, this person
634
00:21:57,816 --> 00:22:02,654
showed me that Yvette and I did not really love each other.
635
00:22:02,754 --> 00:22:05,057
Just not right from the beginning.
636
00:22:05,157 --> 00:22:10,228
True love cannot be put asunder by a casual flirtation.
637
00:22:10,329 --> 00:22:12,931
Or even a serious flirtation.
638
00:22:13,031 --> 00:22:14,232
Yes.
639
00:22:14,332 --> 00:22:15,801
That's very true.
640
00:22:15,901 --> 00:22:18,704
Now I am sure many, many people
641
00:22:18,804 --> 00:22:20,772
have flirted with both of you.
642
00:22:25,644 --> 00:22:27,279
But they could not hurt your marriage, could they?
643
00:22:27,379 --> 00:22:30,716
Oh no, they could never do that.
644
00:22:30,816 --> 00:22:35,153
I always wanted to meet this person again.
645
00:22:35,253 --> 00:22:36,054
Do you know why?
646
00:22:36,154 --> 00:22:36,988
No.
647
00:22:37,089 --> 00:22:38,724
Why?
648
00:22:38,824 --> 00:22:41,893
Two pat this person on the back.
649
00:22:41,993 --> 00:22:42,894
And to shake hands.
650
00:22:50,936 --> 00:22:54,840
Well my friends, I hope I did not bore you with my story.
651
00:22:54,940 --> 00:22:57,642
But since both of you knew Yvette and myself,
652
00:22:57,743 --> 00:22:58,977
I thought you might be interested.
653
00:22:59,077 --> 00:23:00,579
Oh, we were.
654
00:23:00,679 --> 00:23:02,848
Yeah, it was very nice of you to tell us about this Jacques.
655
00:23:02,948 --> 00:23:04,082
It was very nice.
656
00:23:04,182 --> 00:23:05,350
Now I must go.
657
00:23:05,450 --> 00:23:08,453
Laura, it was wonderful seeing you again.
658
00:23:08,553 --> 00:23:09,588
Thank you Jacques.
659
00:23:09,688 --> 00:23:11,156
Goodbye. Goodbye Robert.
660
00:23:11,256 --> 00:23:12,190
Thanks Jacques.
661
00:23:12,290 --> 00:23:13,191
Goodbye.
662
00:23:15,393 --> 00:23:17,696
Oh, now that we have found each other,
663
00:23:17,796 --> 00:23:19,164
why don't you come to the show tomorrow
664
00:23:19,264 --> 00:23:20,332
night and be my guest for dinner?
665
00:23:20,432 --> 00:23:22,100
Oh we'd love to Jacques.
666
00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:23,101
Well, we have this--
667
00:23:23,201 --> 00:23:24,002
Thing.
668
00:23:24,102 --> 00:23:24,936
Yeah.
669
00:23:25,036 --> 00:23:26,471
Too bad.
670
00:23:26,571 --> 00:23:30,575
Maybe some of the time when you have no thing.
671
00:23:30,675 --> 00:23:33,178
It was wonderful to see both of you.
672
00:23:33,278 --> 00:23:34,112
Au revoir.
673
00:23:34,212 --> 00:23:35,147
Goodbye.
674
00:23:40,118 --> 00:23:43,588
I wonder what made Jacques tell us about
675
00:23:43,688 --> 00:23:44,723
him and-- what's her name?
676
00:23:44,823 --> 00:23:45,423
Yvette.
677
00:23:45,524 --> 00:23:46,425
Yvette, yeah.
678
00:23:46,525 --> 00:23:48,093
I don't know, darling.
679
00:23:48,193 --> 00:23:49,828
Probably just thought we'd be interested.
680
00:23:49,928 --> 00:23:50,829
Yeah, probably.
681
00:23:53,632 --> 00:23:56,001
BOTH: Well.
682
00:23:56,101 --> 00:23:57,068
Better be going.
683
00:23:57,169 --> 00:23:58,870
OK, see you at home, Honey.
684
00:24:05,043 --> 00:24:05,944
Well.
685
00:24:10,315 --> 00:24:11,249
Oh.
686
00:24:26,131 --> 00:24:27,432
Ritchie!
687
00:24:27,532 --> 00:24:28,500
What are you doing here?
688
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:30,001
You're supposed to be in bed.
689
00:24:30,101 --> 00:24:31,803
Well I was thirsty.
690
00:24:31,903 --> 00:24:34,439
Do you and Mommy dance like this every night while I'm asleep?
691
00:24:34,539 --> 00:24:35,707
No, not every night.
692
00:24:35,807 --> 00:24:37,476
Then how come you're doing it tonight?
693
00:24:37,576 --> 00:24:39,511
Well, I don't know.
694
00:24:39,611 --> 00:24:40,545
How come we're doing it tonight?
695
00:24:40,645 --> 00:24:41,479
I don't know.
696
00:24:41,580 --> 00:24:42,814
I know.
697
00:24:42,914 --> 00:24:43,782
You do?
698
00:24:43,882 --> 00:24:44,883
Uh huh.
699
00:24:44,983 --> 00:24:46,818
So you put your cheeks together and people
700
00:24:46,918 --> 00:24:49,454
won't think you're mushy.
701
00:24:49,554 --> 00:24:52,257
He's absolutely right.
46606
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