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1
00:00:07,258 --> 00:00:09,529
(Breathing heavily)
2
00:00:19,537 --> 00:00:21,562
(Grunting)
3
00:00:30,838 --> 00:00:33,109
(Groaning)
4
00:00:52,438 --> 00:00:54,205
(Exhales)
5
00:01:01,182 --> 00:01:03,052
Oh, God.
6
00:01:07,930 --> 00:01:10,400
(Sighs)
7
00:01:17,914 --> 00:01:20,418
What the fuck?
8
00:01:24,763 --> 00:01:26,967
(Grunting)
9
00:01:49,846 --> 00:01:52,050
(Groaning)
10
00:01:57,829 --> 00:01:59,014
(Yelps)
11
00:01:59,098 --> 00:02:01,904
(Grunting)
12
00:02:07,448 --> 00:02:09,618
(I a bored breathing)
13
00:02:11,222 --> 00:02:14,411
(Muffled):
Help! Help!
14
00:02:14,495 --> 00:02:18,386
Help!
Help!
15
00:02:18,470 --> 00:02:21,926
Help! Help!
16
00:02:22,010 --> 00:02:23,129
Help!
17
00:02:23,213 --> 00:02:25,483
(Groaning)
18
00:02:26,519 --> 00:02:28,791
[โชโช โชโช]
19
00:02:31,162 --> 00:02:33,433
(panting)
20
00:02:38,410 --> 00:02:40,680
(Exhaling)
21
00:02:55,210 --> 00:02:56,646
Okay.
22
00:02:58,049 --> 00:03:00,120
Okay.
23
00:03:01,589 --> 00:03:04,094
(Breathes deeply)
24
00:03:06,165 --> 00:03:08,436
[โชโช โชโช]
25
00:03:24,903 --> 00:03:26,690
(beep)
26
00:03:26,774 --> 00:03:28,359
GENE:
Hello, Dr. Strauss.
27
00:03:28,443 --> 00:03:30,563
Uh, my name is Gene Bollinger.
28
00:03:30,647 --> 00:03:32,635
I was hoping
to get started in a course
29
00:03:32,719 --> 00:03:34,104
of psychotherapy.
30
00:03:34,188 --> 00:03:36,108
I thought you might be able
to help me
31
00:03:36,192 --> 00:03:37,627
with some of my problems.
32
00:03:38,330 --> 00:03:39,882
So, uh, yeah.
33
00:03:39,966 --> 00:03:42,353
I guess I'll call you back,
uh, if that's okay.
34
00:03:42,437 --> 00:03:43,907
I'm a little hard to reach.
35
00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:47,080
Yeah, okay, thanks.
36
00:03:50,554 --> 00:03:52,825
(Machine beeps)
37
00:03:54,228 --> 00:03:55,614
(Phone beeps, dials)
38
00:03:55,698 --> 00:03:57,217
(line rings)
39
00:03:57,301 --> 00:04:00,056
SHOSHANA: Hi, it's Shoshana.
Leave a message.
40
00:04:00,140 --> 00:04:02,260
- (Beep)
- Hey, honey. It's Dad.
41
00:04:02,344 --> 00:04:03,429
Just checking in.
42
00:04:03,513 --> 00:04:05,433
I'm in sessions until 8:00.
43
00:04:05,517 --> 00:04:07,187
Bye-bye.
44
00:04:13,734 --> 00:04:15,871
What can I help you with, Gene?
45
00:04:18,576 --> 00:04:21,048
My dad beat the shit out of me.
46
00:04:22,384 --> 00:04:25,123
A lot, uh, when I was a kid.
47
00:04:26,525 --> 00:04:29,265
And I think it fucked me up.
48
00:04:30,033 --> 00:04:32,070
That's a tough thing
to go through.
49
00:04:32,972 --> 00:04:35,126
You said it fucked you up.
50
00:04:35,210 --> 00:04:36,996
In what ways?
51
00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:39,001
All ways.
52
00:04:39,085 --> 00:04:40,503
(Pants softly)
53
00:04:40,587 --> 00:04:41,873
Like I'm not content.
54
00:04:41,957 --> 00:04:44,646
I don't have a good social life.
55
00:04:44,730 --> 00:04:46,967
I get angry.
56
00:04:49,973 --> 00:04:53,246
That's the sort of thing
you help people with, right?
57
00:04:54,215 --> 00:04:56,085
Yes.
58
00:04:56,853 --> 00:04:58,472
So, I read your book.
59
00:04:58,556 --> 00:04:59,943
Oh.
60
00:05:00,027 --> 00:05:02,113
- What'd you think?
- It was good.
61
00:05:02,197 --> 00:05:06,222
I thought, you know,
this guy is a real expert.
62
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:07,424
Mm-hmm.
63
00:05:07,508 --> 00:05:09,161
Well, I've been doing it
a long time.
64
00:05:09,245 --> 00:05:11,115
(Chuckles softly)
65
00:05:13,019 --> 00:05:15,256
[โชโช โชโช]
66
00:05:19,065 --> 00:05:22,004
COLLEEN:
I'm sorry for your loss.
67
00:05:22,772 --> 00:05:24,458
That's what
normal people say, right?
68
00:05:24,542 --> 00:05:27,530
ALAN: How does it
feel for you to say it?
69
00:05:27,614 --> 00:05:29,085
COLLEEN:
It just, um...
70
00:05:29,886 --> 00:05:32,407
...just seems like
what I hear people say.
71
00:05:32,491 --> 00:05:33,910
But I mean it.
72
00:05:33,994 --> 00:05:36,800
Well, that is
the important part.
73
00:05:39,371 --> 00:05:40,624
Gene, I wanted to ask you
74
00:05:40,708 --> 00:05:42,260
about your sunglasses.
75
00:05:42,344 --> 00:05:44,431
I think it might be
a good idea for you
76
00:05:44,515 --> 00:05:46,670
to take them off, so we can see
each other better.
77
00:05:46,754 --> 00:05:47,738
I have eye problems.
78
00:05:47,822 --> 00:05:49,541
ALAN:
Oh, what's wrong?
79
00:05:49,625 --> 00:05:51,061
GENE:
Light hurts them.
80
00:05:51,763 --> 00:05:53,382
They're oversensitive.
81
00:05:53,466 --> 00:05:55,420
You've seen a doctor about it?
82
00:05:55,504 --> 00:05:57,390
Two doctors.
83
00:05:57,474 --> 00:05:59,879
[โชโช โชโช]
84
00:06:04,723 --> 00:06:06,710
(water running)
85
00:06:06,794 --> 00:06:08,714
Well, we're out of time.
86
00:06:08,798 --> 00:06:10,684
Isn't that my line?
87
00:06:10,768 --> 00:06:12,521
(Water running)
88
00:06:12,605 --> 00:06:15,360
I'm trying to take care
of your needs again, aren't I?
89
00:06:15,444 --> 00:06:17,397
I think so.
90
00:06:17,481 --> 00:06:19,786
[โชโช โชโช]
91
00:06:23,159 --> 00:06:24,695
He hit me.
92
00:06:25,697 --> 00:06:27,316
All the time.
93
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:29,187
When you say "all the time,"
94
00:06:29,271 --> 00:06:32,628
could you be any more
specific about it?
95
00:06:32,712 --> 00:06:34,648
Pretty much all the time.
96
00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:02,003
(Baby fussing)
97
00:07:30,427 --> 00:07:32,464
[โชโช โชโช]
98
00:07:55,745 --> 00:07:58,031
- Thank you.
- Thank you very much.
99
00:07:58,115 --> 00:08:00,370
- Alan, welcome.
- ALAN: Chaim, how are you?
100
00:08:00,454 --> 00:08:01,471
Baruch Hashem.
101
00:08:01,555 --> 00:08:03,894
- You?
- I'm well, thanks.
102
00:08:05,832 --> 00:08:07,216
- I'll be in the back.
- EZRA: Oh.
103
00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:08,853
Okay.
104
00:08:08,937 --> 00:08:11,442
- Hi, Ezra.
- Hi, Dad.
105
00:08:12,578 --> 00:08:14,498
It's Mom's guitar?
106
00:08:14,582 --> 00:08:15,701
Mm-hmm.
107
00:08:15,785 --> 00:08:17,504
I figured you should have it.
108
00:08:17,588 --> 00:08:20,360
You're the only one
in the family who plays, so...
109
00:08:23,867 --> 00:08:26,305
I don't play anymore.
110
00:08:29,178 --> 00:08:33,169
GENE: That's it, 'cause you'd
expect anybody to save their own ass,
111
00:08:33,253 --> 00:08:36,642
but he'd rather die
than use her as his excuse,
112
00:08:36,726 --> 00:08:38,814
- like, uh, disgrace her.
- ALAN: I think
113
00:08:38,898 --> 00:08:40,482
I have actually heard
that one before.
114
00:08:40,566 --> 00:08:42,620
Right, it's a classic.
115
00:08:42,704 --> 00:08:44,625
(Chuckles)
116
00:08:44,709 --> 00:08:47,915
(Sighs deeply)
117
00:08:49,953 --> 00:08:51,740
You know, Gene,
I've been thinking.
118
00:08:51,824 --> 00:08:53,543
It's been a while
119
00:08:53,627 --> 00:08:55,313
since we started
talking together.
120
00:08:55,397 --> 00:08:58,336
And I've noticed that...
121
00:08:59,371 --> 00:09:03,797
...you're not really
opening yourself up to me.
122
00:09:03,881 --> 00:09:07,103
Whenever I ask
for stories or details,
123
00:09:07,187 --> 00:09:10,109
you have a tendency
to get kind of vague
124
00:09:10,193 --> 00:09:11,412
or you start telling me
125
00:09:11,496 --> 00:09:14,686
about country music songs
that you like.
126
00:09:14,770 --> 00:09:19,260
And I've noticed
that I myself am feeling
127
00:09:19,344 --> 00:09:21,951
a little frustrated
by this process.
128
00:09:22,719 --> 00:09:25,356
And I'm wondering
if you're feeling that as well.
129
00:09:26,392 --> 00:09:29,866
Usually when one person feels
that way, it's kind of mutual.
130
00:09:32,471 --> 00:09:33,606
I don't know.
131
00:09:34,441 --> 00:09:38,165
I guess it's not working
the way it did in your book.
132
00:09:38,249 --> 00:09:41,238
ALAN: Gene, in order
for this process to work,
133
00:09:41,322 --> 00:09:43,910
you have to be able
to tell me things
134
00:09:43,994 --> 00:09:46,532
that are not easy to tell.
135
00:09:47,601 --> 00:09:51,208
To be open and truthful.
136
00:09:53,981 --> 00:09:56,018
Maybe I'm not cut out for this.
137
00:09:57,955 --> 00:10:01,128
'Cause I'm... I'm trying.
138
00:10:01,963 --> 00:10:04,468
I really... I'm trying.
139
00:10:06,205 --> 00:10:08,175
In my experience...
140
00:10:09,211 --> 00:10:10,596
...anyone who has come this far,
141
00:10:10,680 --> 00:10:14,237
who has made the choice
to come to therapy
142
00:10:14,321 --> 00:10:18,329
and keep hammering away
at the hard things...
143
00:10:19,799 --> 00:10:21,435
...they can be helped.
144
00:10:27,114 --> 00:10:29,033
(Kettle whistling)
145
00:10:29,117 --> 00:10:31,622
(Sportscaster speaking
indistinctly on TV)
146
00:10:44,582 --> 00:10:45,868
(Wind whistling)
147
00:10:45,952 --> 00:10:48,456
(Clattering)
148
00:10:52,063 --> 00:10:54,017
(Dogs barking in distance)
149
00:10:54,101 --> 00:10:56,605
(Clattering)
150
00:10:59,111 --> 00:11:01,983
(Dogs continue barking)
151
00:11:04,756 --> 00:11:07,127
(Rustling)
152
00:11:21,522 --> 00:11:24,294
(Rattling)
153
00:11:44,635 --> 00:11:46,038
(Gasps)
154
00:11:51,015 --> 00:11:53,285
(Crows cawing in distance)
155
00:12:02,872 --> 00:12:05,360
[โชโช โชโช]
156
00:12:05,444 --> 00:12:07,982
(clattering)
157
00:12:11,824 --> 00:12:14,461
(Urinating nearby)
158
00:12:26,820 --> 00:12:29,090
(Toilet flushing)
159
00:12:39,946 --> 00:12:42,668
I'm so sorry. I know this sucks.
160
00:12:42,752 --> 00:12:44,287
I'll be right back.
161
00:12:50,735 --> 00:12:53,005
(Door closes)
162
00:12:54,810 --> 00:12:57,898
(Door opens)
163
00:12:57,982 --> 00:12:59,067
(Door closes)
164
00:12:59,151 --> 00:13:01,338
Gene, what the hell's going on?
165
00:13:01,422 --> 00:13:03,743
I mean, what the fuck?!
166
00:13:03,827 --> 00:13:06,481
Let me out, let me out,
let me out of here.
167
00:13:06,565 --> 00:13:08,786
Let me out of here
right now, Gene!
168
00:13:08,870 --> 00:13:11,408
- Gene!
- You take it easy.
169
00:13:13,379 --> 00:13:15,299
Last night you were screaming.
170
00:13:15,383 --> 00:13:18,422
We're in the woods out here.
Nobody's around.
171
00:13:22,932 --> 00:13:24,751
I know how upset you are.
172
00:13:24,835 --> 00:13:26,488
Of course. Anybody would be.
173
00:13:26,572 --> 00:13:28,743
This isn't as bad as it seems.
174
00:13:30,948 --> 00:13:34,805
It's bad, I know it's bad, but
I just, I just need your help.
175
00:13:34,889 --> 00:13:35,958
Look...
176
00:13:36,960 --> 00:13:39,715
I don't know what you think
you're doing, but this...
177
00:13:39,799 --> 00:13:41,184
this...
(sighs)
178
00:13:41,268 --> 00:13:43,121
Unlock this goddamn chain.
179
00:13:43,205 --> 00:13:45,343
Right now. I mean it, Gene.
180
00:13:46,279 --> 00:13:48,115
Gene, listen,
you have to listen to me.
181
00:13:48,950 --> 00:13:50,637
I realize that there's
something inside of you
182
00:13:50,721 --> 00:13:52,506
that's telling you
that this is a good idea...
183
00:13:52,590 --> 00:13:55,012
I know, it's-it's not exactly
that it's a good idea,
184
00:13:55,096 --> 00:13:56,281
I do realize that.
185
00:13:56,365 --> 00:13:58,285
But, you know,
I'm out of options,
186
00:13:58,369 --> 00:14:00,456
and I really think
if we can just talk,
187
00:14:00,540 --> 00:14:02,628
this will, this will be okay.
188
00:14:02,712 --> 00:14:04,698
- Okay-ish.
- I have to help you see
189
00:14:04,782 --> 00:14:06,518
that this is wrong.
190
00:14:07,554 --> 00:14:09,174
Scaring me like this is wrong.
191
00:14:09,258 --> 00:14:11,144
You have to see that.
I know you can see that.
192
00:14:11,228 --> 00:14:12,648
I do, I do, I know,
193
00:14:12,732 --> 00:14:17,156
but... I wasn't getting
anywhere in therapy.
194
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:19,327
You said so yourself, right?
195
00:14:19,411 --> 00:14:20,764
And I think that I know why.
196
00:14:20,848 --> 00:14:22,399
You see, I-I couldn't...
197
00:14:22,483 --> 00:14:25,139
I couldn't really tell you
the truth in your office.
198
00:14:25,223 --> 00:14:26,943
But here, here... I can.
199
00:14:27,027 --> 00:14:28,345
No, no, no, no, no.
200
00:14:28,429 --> 00:14:30,082
This-this-this isn't good
for either of us, Gene.
201
00:14:30,166 --> 00:14:34,024
We have to go back to my office
and work through this together
202
00:14:34,108 --> 00:14:35,627
before this gets
more out of hand.
203
00:14:35,711 --> 00:14:39,033
These are leftovers from Maruti,
which is one of my favorites.
204
00:14:39,117 --> 00:14:40,837
It's surprisingly good
for breakfast.
205
00:14:40,921 --> 00:14:42,407
This is Chana palak.
206
00:14:42,491 --> 00:14:43,608
Put some of this on it.
207
00:14:43,692 --> 00:14:46,280
This is sabzi.
It's good with this one.
208
00:14:46,364 --> 00:14:48,252
For God's sake, Gene, Gene!
209
00:14:48,336 --> 00:14:49,604
My name's...
210
00:14:51,008 --> 00:14:53,145
My name's actually Sam.
211
00:14:57,620 --> 00:14:58,790
Sorry.
212
00:15:02,030 --> 00:15:04,167
It's important to eat.
213
00:15:04,936 --> 00:15:06,756
I'm not gonna eat.
214
00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:08,575
Gene... Sam.
215
00:15:10,279 --> 00:15:12,667
You have to listen to me.
216
00:15:12,751 --> 00:15:13,803
I am listening.
217
00:15:13,887 --> 00:15:15,874
I am listening.
I know how to listen.
218
00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:17,694
I understand...
219
00:15:18,463 --> 00:15:20,550
...this is upsetting for you.
220
00:15:20,634 --> 00:15:21,384
I get that.
221
00:15:21,468 --> 00:15:23,588
It's a little scary,
222
00:15:23,672 --> 00:15:26,411
but this is the only way
that I could... I...
223
00:15:27,848 --> 00:15:29,601
I need help. I want help.
224
00:15:29,685 --> 00:15:32,775
I'm asking you for, for help.
225
00:15:32,859 --> 00:15:35,079
You said therapy can't work
if I'm not truthful.
226
00:15:35,163 --> 00:15:36,281
I know that you're right, so...
227
00:15:36,365 --> 00:15:38,118
Mm-mm. No.
No, you don't understand.
228
00:15:38,202 --> 00:15:40,723
I don't, I don't think you know
what you're doing to me.
229
00:15:40,807 --> 00:15:42,593
I realize it might take you
a little time
230
00:15:42,677 --> 00:15:44,193
to get used
to what's happening here.
231
00:15:44,278 --> 00:15:45,365
Whatever is troubling you,
232
00:15:45,449 --> 00:15:47,738
we can address it, but not here.
233
00:15:47,822 --> 00:15:50,004
- Not like this.
- Dr. Strauss, I have much bigger problems
234
00:15:50,088 --> 00:15:51,590
than your other patients.
235
00:15:53,332 --> 00:15:55,771
I have a compulsion...
236
00:15:57,541 --> 00:15:59,310
...to kill people.
237
00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:06,224
A compulsion?
238
00:16:08,296 --> 00:16:09,765
Yeah, I do it.
239
00:16:15,778 --> 00:16:18,682
- Sam...
- I don't mean just once or twice.
240
00:16:20,019 --> 00:16:22,223
Every once in a while I just...
241
00:16:23,091 --> 00:16:24,527
...do it.
242
00:16:26,966 --> 00:16:29,020
And this has gone on ever since,
243
00:16:29,104 --> 00:16:31,876
uh, for a long time.
244
00:16:32,643 --> 00:16:35,132
And I know I'm fucked up.
245
00:16:35,216 --> 00:16:37,169
I've read all the books,
246
00:16:37,253 --> 00:16:40,343
almost everything about,
uh, people like me,
247
00:16:40,427 --> 00:16:42,865
people who do this stuff,
and I can't...
248
00:16:45,904 --> 00:16:47,357
I want to stop.
249
00:16:47,441 --> 00:16:50,129
And I'm trying so hard.
250
00:16:50,213 --> 00:16:51,732
I'm trying so hard right now,
251
00:16:51,816 --> 00:16:53,435
but there's this guy,
there's this one guy,
252
00:16:53,519 --> 00:16:54,905
and I just want to...
253
00:16:54,989 --> 00:16:57,326
for months now...
254
00:16:58,195 --> 00:16:59,697
Uh, but I've not done it.
255
00:17:00,467 --> 00:17:01,803
'Cause I...
256
00:17:03,539 --> 00:17:04,825
Uh, because I can't.
257
00:17:04,909 --> 00:17:05,894
Now, you, I wish you knew
258
00:17:05,978 --> 00:17:07,529
what it was like
to live like this.
259
00:17:07,613 --> 00:17:09,300
It's not like what they say.
260
00:17:09,384 --> 00:17:10,955
Right? Where he's like a...
261
00:17:11,723 --> 00:17:13,677
Have you seen
Silence of the Lambs?
262
00:17:13,761 --> 00:17:16,314
Where he's like a robot.
(clears throat)
263
00:17:16,398 --> 00:17:17,835
It's not like that.
264
00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:20,389
Gene.
265
00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:23,445
- Sam.
- Sam.
266
00:17:25,216 --> 00:17:26,769
Unlock this chain.
267
00:17:26,853 --> 00:17:29,340
I'm going to walk out of here
and go back to my office.
268
00:17:29,424 --> 00:17:31,507
No, we already tried that.
269
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:33,312
It didn't work without me
telling you the truth.
270
00:17:33,396 --> 00:17:35,325
It will be different
now that I know the truth.
271
00:17:35,763 --> 00:17:38,403
You will come to my office
two, three days a week.
272
00:17:38,488 --> 00:17:40,475
I cannot help you like this.
273
00:17:40,567 --> 00:17:42,337
This is just going
to make it worse.
274
00:17:42,703 --> 00:17:43,813
Let me go.
275
00:17:43,898 --> 00:17:45,372
I know you'd have to turn me in.
276
00:17:45,457 --> 00:17:48,696
No, no, no, no, no.
I would not have to turn you in.
277
00:17:49,431 --> 00:17:51,017
Legally, ethically,
278
00:17:51,101 --> 00:17:53,856
unless you told me you were
going to commit another crime,
279
00:17:53,940 --> 00:17:55,458
I can work with you.
280
00:17:55,542 --> 00:17:57,964
Everything you've told me
so far is confidential.
281
00:17:58,048 --> 00:18:00,052
I am gonna commit another crime.
282
00:18:01,021 --> 00:18:03,091
(Exhaling)
283
00:18:07,033 --> 00:18:09,120
I know I'm not normal.
284
00:18:09,204 --> 00:18:11,074
But I don't feel crazy.
285
00:18:12,043 --> 00:18:13,295
I'm not...
286
00:18:13,379 --> 00:18:15,099
(sighs)
287
00:18:15,183 --> 00:18:17,637
I know this has to end, right?
This has to stop.
288
00:18:17,721 --> 00:18:20,659
I just, I don't know how.
289
00:18:23,934 --> 00:18:25,402
This is not the way.
290
00:18:26,438 --> 00:18:27,808
Well...
291
00:18:28,542 --> 00:18:30,112
I'm sorry.
292
00:18:34,354 --> 00:18:36,074
Really, you're the best.
293
00:18:36,798 --> 00:18:40,137
I met with three different
Jewish therapists.
294
00:18:40,665 --> 00:18:42,186
I chose you.
295
00:18:42,722 --> 00:18:44,992
Uh-huh.
296
00:18:51,154 --> 00:18:53,425
[โชโช โชโช]
297
00:20:56,037 --> 00:20:58,475
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
19680
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