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1
00:00:01,602 --> 00:00:04,742
[The partridge family's
"Come on get happy" Playing]
2
00:00:08,176 --> 00:00:12,406
♪ hello, world, hear the
song that we're singing ♪
3
00:00:12,413 --> 00:00:16,723
♪ come on, get happy ♪
4
00:00:16,717 --> 00:00:20,947
♪ a whole lot of lovin' is
what we'll be bringing ♪
5
00:00:20,954 --> 00:00:25,194
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
6
00:00:25,193 --> 00:00:28,363
♪ we had a dream we'd
go traveling together ♪
7
00:00:28,362 --> 00:00:30,232
♪ we'd spread a little love ♪
8
00:00:30,231 --> 00:00:32,071
♪ and then we'll
keep movin' on ♪
9
00:00:32,066 --> 00:00:35,166
♪ something always happens
whenever we're together ♪
10
00:00:35,169 --> 00:00:38,769
♪ we get a happy feeling
when we're singing a song ♪
11
00:00:38,772 --> 00:00:42,782
♪ traveling along there's
a song that we're singing ♪
12
00:00:42,776 --> 00:00:47,146
♪ come on, get happy ♪
13
00:00:47,148 --> 00:00:51,248
♪ a whole lot of lovin' is
what we'll be bringing ♪
14
00:00:51,252 --> 00:00:54,122
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
15
00:00:54,122 --> 00:00:58,232
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
16
00:00:58,226 --> 00:01:02,096
♪ we'll make you happy ♪
17
00:01:04,132 --> 00:01:05,502
[♪♪♪]
18
00:01:08,469 --> 00:01:11,739
I'm waiting. I'm thinking.
19
00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:13,209
I got it!
20
00:01:13,207 --> 00:01:14,567
You're so ugly,
21
00:01:14,575 --> 00:01:16,805
your face ought to
be arrested for littering.
22
00:01:16,810 --> 00:01:18,910
Top that one.
23
00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:21,212
All right, uh...
24
00:01:21,215 --> 00:01:22,515
You're so dumb...
25
00:01:22,516 --> 00:01:24,346
Not another "You're
so dumb" Insult.
26
00:01:24,352 --> 00:01:26,992
Not very original. All right.
27
00:01:26,987 --> 00:01:29,317
Um...
28
00:01:29,323 --> 00:01:31,063
You're so short...
29
00:01:31,058 --> 00:01:34,788
You're so short you have to
wear elevator shoes to get into bed.
30
00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:36,425
[♪♪♪]
31
00:01:38,399 --> 00:01:42,399
Can't think of one, huh?
I'm gonna be late for school.
32
00:01:42,403 --> 00:01:45,913
Better hurry. You'll need
all the help you can get.
33
00:01:45,906 --> 00:01:47,906
Oh, uh, partridge. Hi, coach.
34
00:01:47,908 --> 00:01:50,008
Uh, partridge, we have a
few minutes before class.
35
00:01:50,010 --> 00:01:52,580
I'd like to have a little
talk with you in my office,
36
00:01:52,580 --> 00:01:54,410
man-to-man.
37
00:01:54,415 --> 00:01:57,945
Who was the, uh, little guy
you were arguing with outside?
38
00:01:57,951 --> 00:02:01,291
Oh, Danny? That was no
little guy. He's my brother.
39
00:02:01,289 --> 00:02:04,789
I thought so. Well, uh...
40
00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:06,292
You were, uh...
41
00:02:06,294 --> 00:02:08,164
You were being a little
hard on him, weren't you?
42
00:02:08,162 --> 00:02:09,462
Oh, well, we weren't arguing.
43
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:11,663
Uh, we were just
insulting each other.
44
00:02:11,665 --> 00:02:14,965
It's a game we play. I see.
45
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:16,538
[Clears throat]
46
00:02:16,537 --> 00:02:19,337
Your, uh... your mother's
a widow, isn't she?
47
00:02:19,340 --> 00:02:21,040
Well, yeah, but
what has that...?
48
00:02:21,041 --> 00:02:23,441
And I'm sure your mother
does the best job she can.
49
00:02:23,444 --> 00:02:26,484
But a mother isn't enough.
You're the eldest male...
50
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,110
And your brothers and sisters
51
00:02:28,115 --> 00:02:31,775
are turning to
you for leadership.
52
00:02:31,785 --> 00:02:33,985
Me?
53
00:02:33,987 --> 00:02:36,857
Coach, Danny and I
were insulting each other.
54
00:02:36,857 --> 00:02:37,857
It's a game.
55
00:02:37,858 --> 00:02:39,858
And where did
he learn the rules?
56
00:02:39,860 --> 00:02:42,430
Look, the kids in your
family may not admit
57
00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:43,860
that you influence them.
58
00:02:43,864 --> 00:02:46,304
They probably don't
even realize it themselves.
59
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:47,800
But you do.
60
00:02:47,801 --> 00:02:51,371
Now, it's just a matter of
how you influence them.
61
00:02:51,372 --> 00:02:52,812
[♪♪♪]
62
00:02:52,806 --> 00:02:55,276
I never thought
about it like that.
63
00:02:58,045 --> 00:03:02,315
Okay, Keith, you
really asked for this one.
64
00:03:02,316 --> 00:03:03,716
You're so dumb,
65
00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:06,787
you have to brush your
teeth by the numbers.
66
00:03:06,787 --> 00:03:08,557
[Laughing]
67
00:03:10,624 --> 00:03:14,734
You know, you're getting
to be quite a little man.
68
00:03:19,333 --> 00:03:20,833
[♪♪♪]
69
00:03:28,342 --> 00:03:29,912
[♪♪♪]
70
00:03:37,451 --> 00:03:38,891
[♪♪♪]
71
00:03:38,886 --> 00:03:40,886
Reuben, I just
can't do it. I'm sorry.
72
00:03:40,888 --> 00:03:43,818
Look, you said you'd be
happy to take publicity pictures.
73
00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:45,664
So I set it up
for this Saturday.
74
00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:46,989
And now you say you're sorry?
75
00:03:46,994 --> 00:03:48,564
You should have
checked with me first.
76
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:50,332
I promised Chris,
Tracy and Danny
77
00:03:50,331 --> 00:03:51,931
I'd take them to the
beach on Saturday.
78
00:03:51,932 --> 00:03:54,232
Shirley, the
photographer is booked.
79
00:03:54,234 --> 00:03:55,974
The photographer
can be UN-booked.
80
00:03:55,969 --> 00:03:57,569
My kids can't.
81
00:03:57,571 --> 00:04:00,211
Do you have a warped
sense of priorities.
82
00:04:00,207 --> 00:04:01,907
I should have taken that job
83
00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:03,839
managing reptilia
the snake girl.
84
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:07,814
Nobody ever wanted
publicity pictures of her.
85
00:04:07,815 --> 00:04:10,945
Hi.
86
00:04:10,951 --> 00:04:14,221
What's wrong? Well,
I'm just preoccupied.
87
00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:17,021
With thoughts of killing myself.
88
00:04:17,024 --> 00:04:18,794
What's the matter?
89
00:04:18,792 --> 00:04:21,692
Reuben wants me to take
publicity pictures on Saturday
90
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:25,225
and I promised the kids
I'd take them to the beach.
91
00:04:25,232 --> 00:04:26,872
Well, I'll take them.
92
00:04:26,867 --> 00:04:28,397
[♪♪♪]
93
00:04:28,402 --> 00:04:29,802
You will?
94
00:04:29,803 --> 00:04:32,443
Kincaid: You are
volunteering? Sure.
95
00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:34,070
But I thought you were
gonna take Barbara
96
00:04:34,074 --> 00:04:35,314
for a drive on Saturday.
97
00:04:35,309 --> 00:04:36,509
I'll cancel it.
98
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:39,710
The kids are more
important anyway.
99
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:41,623
Uh, more important than girls?
100
00:04:42,850 --> 00:04:44,750
Shirley, this kid
is an impostor.
101
00:04:44,752 --> 00:04:47,792
What's your middle name?
Fast. Douglas. Satisfied?
102
00:04:47,788 --> 00:04:50,988
Uh, I don't know. I don't
know your middle name.
103
00:04:50,991 --> 00:04:53,131
Honey, I appreciate
you volunteering
104
00:04:53,126 --> 00:04:54,586
to take the kids to the beach,
105
00:04:54,595 --> 00:04:56,295
but it just doesn't
sound like you.
106
00:04:56,296 --> 00:04:58,896
Well, I've been thinking.
Since I am the eldest male
107
00:04:58,899 --> 00:05:00,769
I have a lot of
influence on them.
108
00:05:00,768 --> 00:05:03,638
Besides, I'm old enough
to accept my responsibilities
109
00:05:03,637 --> 00:05:07,037
and give them the kind
of leadership they need.
110
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:11,740
Keith, have you been
talking to a marine recruiter?
111
00:05:11,745 --> 00:05:13,505
Reuben, don't tease him.
112
00:05:13,514 --> 00:05:16,824
It's a very nice gesture,
and very mature.
113
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:19,517
I'd be very happy to let you
take the kids to the beach.
114
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,150
Thank you.
115
00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:23,664
Oh, do you mind if I take them
somewhere besides the beach?
116
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,217
I don't think so. Why?
117
00:05:25,225 --> 00:05:28,085
Well, I thought I'd take
them someplace fun, but, uh,
118
00:05:28,095 --> 00:05:29,855
with a little more class.
119
00:05:29,863 --> 00:05:31,573
[Orchestra playing
classical music]
120
00:05:54,121 --> 00:05:56,021
When I said we were
going to the park,
121
00:05:56,023 --> 00:05:58,063
I bet you didn't
expect a concert, huh?
122
00:05:58,058 --> 00:06:01,488
Not in a million years.
123
00:06:01,495 --> 00:06:05,325
I thought you might enjoy some
classical music for a change.
124
00:06:05,332 --> 00:06:08,002
It's like combining
fun with education.
125
00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:10,171
I see the education.
126
00:06:10,170 --> 00:06:11,570
Where's the fun?
127
00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:15,340
I'd rather go to the beach.
128
00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:18,652
If you'd give it a try, you
might find out you liked it.
129
00:06:18,646 --> 00:06:21,046
Do you like this music?
130
00:06:21,048 --> 00:06:22,648
[Sighs]
131
00:06:22,650 --> 00:06:24,250
Well, I'm giving it a try.
132
00:06:24,251 --> 00:06:27,521
I mean, uh, that's the trouble
with you kids nowadays.
133
00:06:27,521 --> 00:06:29,391
You're afraid to try new things.
134
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:33,959
Okay, I'll give it a try.
135
00:06:33,961 --> 00:06:36,601
I gave it a try. Now
can we go to the beach?
136
00:06:36,597 --> 00:06:38,127
[♪♪♪]
137
00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:42,333
Keith: And atop of
that hill over there
138
00:06:42,335 --> 00:06:43,665
on your left is a
historic landmark.
139
00:06:43,671 --> 00:06:45,771
Spanish conquistadors
once camped there.
140
00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:47,773
Danny: Boy,
that's a thrill, Keith.
141
00:06:47,775 --> 00:06:49,275
Keith: And over on the right
142
00:06:49,276 --> 00:06:51,706
is where Spanish conquistadors
once killed game to eat.
143
00:06:51,712 --> 00:06:54,482
Danny: One thrill after another.
144
00:06:54,482 --> 00:06:56,422
[♪♪♪]
145
00:06:58,519 --> 00:07:01,719
Art represents the
artist's philosophy of life.
146
00:07:01,722 --> 00:07:05,462
Each piece has its
own symbolic meaning.
147
00:07:05,459 --> 00:07:10,399
It looks like a garage sale
in the house of Frankenstein.
148
00:07:10,397 --> 00:07:12,357
What's that?
149
00:07:12,365 --> 00:07:15,025
I don't know. Let's see.
150
00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:16,195
Uh...
151
00:07:16,203 --> 00:07:18,473
I think that represents
man's culture.
152
00:07:18,472 --> 00:07:20,672
We created a plastic society
153
00:07:20,674 --> 00:07:22,074
and now we're
trapped inside of it.
154
00:07:22,075 --> 00:07:23,935
Maybe that's
what it represents...
155
00:07:23,944 --> 00:07:25,554
But if I left it
out on the curb,
156
00:07:25,546 --> 00:07:27,146
the garbage man
would pick it up.
157
00:07:27,147 --> 00:07:28,577
[♪♪♪]
158
00:07:36,524 --> 00:07:39,934
Danny, what are you doing?
159
00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:42,664
Are you alone?
160
00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:45,533
Just me and my broom.
161
00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:50,403
Okay, troops, fall
out. The coast is clear.
162
00:07:50,403 --> 00:07:53,543
What's going on here?
We thought you were Keith.
163
00:07:53,541 --> 00:07:55,411
Why are you hiding from Keith?
164
00:07:55,408 --> 00:07:57,278
Well, he's
threatening to teach us
165
00:07:57,277 --> 00:07:58,777
all about the league of nations.
166
00:07:58,779 --> 00:08:00,779
Keith: Danny?
167
00:08:00,781 --> 00:08:02,881
I bet he found
the encyclopedias.
168
00:08:02,883 --> 00:08:05,693
Keith: I found the
encyclopedias.
169
00:08:05,686 --> 00:08:07,086
Forget you ever saw us.
170
00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:08,257
[♪♪♪]
171
00:08:12,660 --> 00:08:15,230
I could only find volume r.
172
00:08:15,228 --> 00:08:18,128
I wonder if they'd mind
reading about Romania.
173
00:08:18,131 --> 00:08:19,431
[Doorbell rings]
174
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:21,702
That must be Laurie's date.
175
00:08:23,070 --> 00:08:24,500
Hello, come in.
176
00:08:24,504 --> 00:08:27,444
Hi, I'm... I'm Freddy,
Laurie's date.
177
00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:29,240
How do you do?
I'm Laurie's mother.
178
00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:30,782
I'll have her home early.
179
00:08:30,778 --> 00:08:33,878
Well, I'm pleased
to hear that. Um...
180
00:08:33,881 --> 00:08:37,021
Won't you sit down and
relax? Oh, I'm... I'm relaxed.
181
00:08:37,017 --> 00:08:44,017
I'll just stand here.
Well, suit yourself.
182
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:46,464
Keith, this is
Freddy, Laurie's date.
183
00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:49,029
Hi. I'll see if she's ready.
184
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:51,900
[Sighs]
185
00:08:51,899 --> 00:08:53,469
Boy.
186
00:08:53,466 --> 00:08:55,526
I'm glad that's over. What?
187
00:08:55,535 --> 00:08:57,495
Meeting the mother.
188
00:08:57,504 --> 00:09:00,244
But your mother's
pretty cool. Oh.
189
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,270
Yeah. They usually
give you the third degree.
190
00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:04,105
You know, where
are you taking her?
191
00:09:04,111 --> 00:09:05,811
What time are you
gonna bring her home?
192
00:09:05,813 --> 00:09:08,113
Oh, yeah, I know what you mean.
193
00:09:08,115 --> 00:09:10,145
Where are you taking her? Hmm?
194
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:13,794
What time you gonna
bring her home?
195
00:09:13,787 --> 00:09:15,557
Early. After the movie.
196
00:09:17,157 --> 00:09:20,657
You, uh, taking her to
a walk-in or a drive-in?
197
00:09:20,661 --> 00:09:23,201
A drive-in.
198
00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:24,496
A walk-in?
199
00:09:24,497 --> 00:09:26,697
As long as it's rated
for the general public.
200
00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:27,930
[♪♪♪]
201
00:09:27,935 --> 00:09:29,935
How about love story? Mmm...
202
00:09:29,937 --> 00:09:34,107
A little racy. How
about a good western?
203
00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:36,307
Oh, I love westerns. Great.
204
00:09:36,309 --> 00:09:38,949
Look, i... I hope you don't mind
me asking you these questions.
205
00:09:38,946 --> 00:09:42,816
Oh, not at all. Sir.
206
00:09:42,816 --> 00:09:46,416
Hi. I'm ready. Oh, great.
207
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:48,959
Are you nervous about
something? Oh, not me. I...
208
00:09:48,956 --> 00:09:50,316
I just don't wanna be late
209
00:09:50,323 --> 00:09:52,963
for the first feature
at the walk-in movie.
210
00:09:54,161 --> 00:09:55,801
Have fun, kids.
211
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:58,126
Right. And I'll see
you back here at 10:00.
212
00:09:58,131 --> 00:10:00,031
Right.
213
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,301
[♪♪♪]
214
00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:18,688
Keith, where are the kids?
I've called them three times.
215
00:10:18,686 --> 00:10:20,886
I don't know, mom.
I haven't seen them.
216
00:10:20,888 --> 00:10:22,718
Hey, Reuben, did
you get those tickets?
217
00:10:22,723 --> 00:10:26,293
Sorry, they were all sold out.
218
00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,493
What did you want
those tickets for, anyway?
219
00:10:28,495 --> 00:10:30,755
I wanted to take the kids.
220
00:10:30,764 --> 00:10:34,234
To the bolshoi ballet?
The bolshoi ballet?
221
00:10:34,234 --> 00:10:35,974
Yeah, I wanted to surprise them.
222
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,869
It certainly would've
been a surprise.
223
00:10:37,871 --> 00:10:40,741
Do you think the kids are
really ready for the ballet?
224
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:44,041
Why not? It would be a
good influence on them.
225
00:10:44,044 --> 00:10:46,414
Well, I gotta go.
I'm gonna be late.
226
00:10:46,413 --> 00:10:47,813
See you. Bye, honey.
227
00:10:47,815 --> 00:10:50,675
See you, Reuben. Bye.
228
00:10:50,684 --> 00:10:52,384
[♪♪♪]
229
00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:53,515
I'm really mad at him.
230
00:10:53,520 --> 00:10:55,790
Freddy will never
ask me out again.
231
00:10:55,789 --> 00:10:56,989
Keith means well.
232
00:10:56,990 --> 00:10:58,190
He's just trying to be helpful.
233
00:10:58,191 --> 00:10:59,831
What's wrong with him anyway?
234
00:10:59,827 --> 00:11:01,287
He's a creepo.
235
00:11:01,294 --> 00:11:03,164
Look, he may have
gone a little overboard,
236
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:04,733
but his intentions are good.
237
00:11:04,732 --> 00:11:06,702
What intentions?
238
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,970
Laurie, Keith feels
239
00:11:08,969 --> 00:11:11,369
that since he's the
eldest male in the family...
240
00:11:11,371 --> 00:11:13,641
That he's responsible
for the rest of you.
241
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:15,780
He wants to be a good influence.
242
00:11:15,776 --> 00:11:18,806
He wants to provide
you with leadership.
243
00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:20,712
All: Keith?
244
00:11:20,714 --> 00:11:22,154
[♪♪♪]
245
00:11:23,984 --> 00:11:25,324
I suppose you're wondering
246
00:11:25,318 --> 00:11:28,718
why I called you all
here this afternoon.
247
00:11:28,722 --> 00:11:30,322
We have a common problem.
248
00:11:37,264 --> 00:11:38,904
This is our problem.
249
00:11:38,899 --> 00:11:42,769
This brother wants to be
our leader. I have a plan.
250
00:11:42,770 --> 00:11:45,100
If you have a plan,
it must be rotten.
251
00:11:45,105 --> 00:11:47,605
No. We're going
to let him lead us.
252
00:11:47,607 --> 00:11:49,277
Until he begs for mercy.
253
00:11:50,811 --> 00:11:52,051
[♪♪♪]
254
00:11:56,850 --> 00:11:58,750
[Strumming guitar]
255
00:12:05,258 --> 00:12:08,058
[Whispering] Okay, he's alone. Do
you know what you're supposed to say?
256
00:12:08,061 --> 00:12:09,531
Check. Roger.
257
00:12:09,529 --> 00:12:11,059
This is gonna be fun.
258
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:13,574
This may all be in fun, but
we can't let him know that.
259
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:16,366
So I want you to go
out there and be sincere.
260
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:19,309
Remember, we owe him one
for those historical landmarks.
261
00:12:19,306 --> 00:12:21,506
Let's get him.
262
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:28,523
Hi, kids. We need your advice.
263
00:12:29,616 --> 00:12:31,176
Sure.
264
00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:34,424
What can I help you
with? Career counseling.
265
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:35,791
Career counseling?
266
00:12:35,789 --> 00:12:37,659
Well, we've decided
what we wanna be.
267
00:12:37,657 --> 00:12:41,357
But everybody says we
can't. Well, sure you can.
268
00:12:41,361 --> 00:12:43,131
Everybody says
you have to be born
269
00:12:43,130 --> 00:12:45,030
in the right kind of family.
270
00:12:45,032 --> 00:12:46,632
That's ridiculous.
271
00:12:46,633 --> 00:12:48,773
It doesn't make any
difference what kind of family
272
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:49,938
you come from in this country.
273
00:12:49,937 --> 00:12:51,667
You can be anything
you wanna be.
274
00:12:51,671 --> 00:12:54,341
Now, what is it you wanna
be when you grow up?
275
00:12:55,708 --> 00:12:57,308
Negroes.
276
00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:58,810
[♪♪♪]
277
00:13:02,649 --> 00:13:04,119
Well, he's here.
278
00:13:04,117 --> 00:13:05,987
Danny [on phone]:
Great. Really lay it on thick.
279
00:13:05,986 --> 00:13:09,016
Oh, I don't know, Danny. I
don't think I should do this.
280
00:13:09,022 --> 00:13:11,862
It's really a mean trick.
281
00:13:11,859 --> 00:13:15,729
Okay. I guess it is best
to turn the other cheek.
282
00:13:15,728 --> 00:13:18,298
Even though Freddy will
never ask you out again.
283
00:13:18,298 --> 00:13:21,398
Hi, Danny said you
wanted to see me.
284
00:13:22,769 --> 00:13:24,839
What's wrong?
285
00:13:24,838 --> 00:13:26,068
[Sighs]
286
00:13:26,073 --> 00:13:31,613
Oh, nothing. Laurie, what is it?
287
00:13:31,611 --> 00:13:37,121
Well, I'm fine. But this friend
of mine has a serious problem.
288
00:13:38,351 --> 00:13:39,751
Oh.
289
00:13:39,752 --> 00:13:41,692
I see.
290
00:13:41,688 --> 00:13:43,788
Friend, huh? Yes.
291
00:13:43,790 --> 00:13:45,260
[♪♪♪]
292
00:13:45,258 --> 00:13:48,958
The man she loved ran
away with an older woman.
293
00:13:48,962 --> 00:13:50,362
One in college.
294
00:13:52,765 --> 00:13:54,665
What a rotten way to get it.
295
00:13:54,667 --> 00:13:56,367
Yes.
296
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:59,409
My friend never wants
to see a guy ever again.
297
00:13:59,406 --> 00:14:02,036
Well, that's exactly the
wrong attitude to take.
298
00:14:02,042 --> 00:14:05,452
She should go out with
a bunch of different guys.
299
00:14:07,780 --> 00:14:10,080
I think you're right.
300
00:14:10,083 --> 00:14:12,653
Oh, Keith, you've
been a great help to me.
301
00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:14,522
[♪♪♪]
302
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:16,861
Excuse me, my friend
has to make a date.
303
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:18,786
Great. Who's she going out with?
304
00:14:18,791 --> 00:14:21,231
The football team.
305
00:14:26,900 --> 00:14:28,400
[♪♪♪]
306
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,471
What is it?
307
00:14:30,470 --> 00:14:33,010
I wanna know
about the facts of life.
308
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:35,237
[♪♪♪]
309
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:37,212
The facts of life? Right.
310
00:14:38,678 --> 00:14:40,508
[♪♪♪]
311
00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:42,213
Why don't you ask mom?
312
00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:45,075
What would mom know
about the facts of life?
313
00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:48,615
Oh, yeah. Guess you're right.
314
00:14:50,757 --> 00:14:52,957
Uh...
315
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:56,600
Well, I suppose I could tell
you about the birds and the bees.
316
00:14:56,596 --> 00:14:58,966
I don't wanna know
about the birds and bees.
317
00:14:58,966 --> 00:15:00,466
I wanna know about people.
318
00:15:00,467 --> 00:15:02,367
People?
319
00:15:04,037 --> 00:15:05,607
[♪♪♪]
320
00:15:08,775 --> 00:15:12,035
Oh, one more thing. What?
321
00:15:12,045 --> 00:15:13,605
Why do people go
through all that trouble
322
00:15:13,613 --> 00:15:17,353
when they don't even
wanna have babies?
323
00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:20,650
Danny, you just
can't explain it.
324
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:22,093
You have to be there.
325
00:15:22,089 --> 00:15:24,859
Well, thanks. You
saved my life. I did?
326
00:15:24,857 --> 00:15:27,487
Well, yeah. If you hadn't
cleared up those rumors,
327
00:15:27,494 --> 00:15:31,934
I'd be in big trouble
when I got married.
328
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:34,631
My pleasure.
329
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:36,174
[♪♪♪]
330
00:15:38,871 --> 00:15:40,441
[Knocking on door]
331
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:42,410
Come in.
332
00:15:45,745 --> 00:15:50,175
Well, how did your personal
conference with Danny go?
333
00:15:50,183 --> 00:15:52,423
He is really something else.
334
00:15:52,419 --> 00:15:54,419
I know.
335
00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:58,033
You know, uh...
336
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,560
You are too.
337
00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:04,903
I mean, I never
knew what it was like
338
00:16:04,897 --> 00:16:07,927
to have responsibilities
to kids before.
339
00:16:07,934 --> 00:16:09,504
It's not easy.
340
00:16:11,404 --> 00:16:14,674
Sure has made me
appreciate you a lot more.
341
00:16:14,674 --> 00:16:16,184
Thank you, honey.
342
00:16:16,176 --> 00:16:18,476
I'm beginning to realize
that responsibilities are
343
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,448
something you have
to assume gradually.
344
00:16:22,349 --> 00:16:23,779
Well...
345
00:16:23,783 --> 00:16:27,293
You are a little young
to be raising four kids.
346
00:16:27,287 --> 00:16:29,587
I'm old enough to
handle it, all right.
347
00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:32,889
It's just it doesn't leave me
enough time to do my homework.
348
00:16:32,892 --> 00:16:34,692
[♪♪♪]
349
00:16:39,199 --> 00:16:42,699
Good night. Good
night, sweetheart.
350
00:16:48,941 --> 00:16:50,441
[Laughing]
351
00:16:50,443 --> 00:16:52,783
I told him that my
girlfriend's boyfriend ran away
352
00:16:52,779 --> 00:16:53,849
with a cheap cheerleader.
353
00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:55,346
[Laughing]
354
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,148
I wish I could've seen
you and Keith in the park.
355
00:16:57,150 --> 00:16:59,520
I've never seen you cry before.
356
00:16:59,519 --> 00:17:02,219
Well, to tell you the truth,
I feel kind of bad about it.
357
00:17:02,222 --> 00:17:04,362
Oh, come on. You enjoyed it.
358
00:17:04,357 --> 00:17:06,627
True, he did deserve it.
359
00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:08,586
You should have
seen Keith's face
360
00:17:08,595 --> 00:17:11,425
when I asked him to
explain the facts of life to me.
361
00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:14,231
I asked him if kissing was
hazardous to a person's health.
362
00:17:14,234 --> 00:17:16,404
Laurie [laughing]: Oh,
no. Chris: What did he say?
363
00:17:16,403 --> 00:17:18,473
He said not as long as
I wash behind my ears
364
00:17:18,471 --> 00:17:20,271
and take plenty of vitamin c.
365
00:17:20,273 --> 00:17:21,543
[Kids laughing]
366
00:17:21,541 --> 00:17:23,141
Laurie: I really
thought he'd catch on.
367
00:17:23,143 --> 00:17:24,543
Tracy: Yeah, I
knew all the time.
368
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:25,784
Are you kidding?
369
00:17:25,778 --> 00:17:27,578
You can fool some of the
people some of the time.
370
00:17:27,580 --> 00:17:30,480
But you can fool Keith
partridge all of the time.
371
00:17:30,483 --> 00:17:31,883
Kids.
372
00:17:31,884 --> 00:17:34,454
[♪♪♪]
373
00:17:34,454 --> 00:17:36,464
Keith.
374
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:43,761
How long was he standing
there? Long enough.
375
00:17:52,272 --> 00:17:55,042
He's been gone for hours.
376
00:17:55,041 --> 00:17:56,811
Maybe he ran away.
377
00:17:56,809 --> 00:17:58,879
He's too old to run away.
378
00:17:58,878 --> 00:18:00,578
[Door opens]
379
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:04,380
Did you find him? No.
380
00:18:04,384 --> 00:18:06,754
I went to all of his hangouts.
381
00:18:06,753 --> 00:18:08,293
No one's seen him.
382
00:18:08,288 --> 00:18:10,688
[♪♪♪]
383
00:18:10,690 --> 00:18:12,330
Did you have any luck, mom?
384
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:15,260
He's in the garage.
385
00:18:15,262 --> 00:18:18,602
He's been there the whole
time. What's he doing there?
386
00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:23,468
I don't know, I just found
him. But he's very hurt.
387
00:18:23,470 --> 00:18:26,370
I don't think he thought
your little joke was very funny.
388
00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:28,643
Mom, we didn't mean to hurt him.
389
00:18:28,641 --> 00:18:31,011
Well, what did you expect?
390
00:18:31,010 --> 00:18:33,910
Whatever Keith did, he
did because he loves you.
391
00:18:33,913 --> 00:18:39,053
And you return his love
by making a fool of him.
392
00:18:39,051 --> 00:18:40,451
What do we do now?
393
00:18:42,655 --> 00:18:44,715
Well...
394
00:18:44,724 --> 00:18:48,034
You might start by
telling him you're sorry.
395
00:18:48,027 --> 00:18:49,697
[♪♪♪]
396
00:18:54,934 --> 00:18:56,904
Keith...
397
00:18:56,903 --> 00:19:01,343
The kids have something
they want to say to you.
398
00:19:01,341 --> 00:19:04,911
Keith, we just meant the
whole thing as a put-on.
399
00:19:04,911 --> 00:19:06,581
But...
400
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:10,379
Well, I guess we were
pretty thoughtless. I'm sorry.
401
00:19:16,456 --> 00:19:18,756
This means "I'm sorry."
402
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:22,628
before it meant "I'm
sorry, " It was a goldfish.
403
00:19:28,635 --> 00:19:31,365
Chris: You know all that
intellectual stuff you showed us?
404
00:19:31,371 --> 00:19:33,271
Well, some of it did rub off.
405
00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:34,813
I'm gonna learn
406
00:19:34,807 --> 00:19:36,807
to play Beethoven's fifth
symphony on the drums.
407
00:19:39,779 --> 00:19:41,779
[Clears throat]
408
00:19:41,781 --> 00:19:43,721
Keith?
409
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:48,248
I really am sorry.
410
00:19:48,255 --> 00:19:50,055
I realize now you
were just trying
411
00:19:50,056 --> 00:19:51,656
to do the best thing for us.
412
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:54,128
And we repaid you by
playing a rotten joke.
413
00:19:54,126 --> 00:19:55,326
I'm sorry.
414
00:19:57,864 --> 00:20:00,234
Besides, it was
all Laurie's idea.
415
00:20:01,100 --> 00:20:02,470
[Inaudible dialogue]
416
00:20:04,136 --> 00:20:06,236
[Laughs]
417
00:20:06,239 --> 00:20:08,779
[Playing "Summer days"]
418
00:20:20,753 --> 00:20:28,033
♪ I feel the sunlight
on my face ♪
419
00:20:28,027 --> 00:20:34,897
♪ when I just close
my eyes and I trace ♪
420
00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:41,941
♪ the footpath to your
daddy's summer place ♪
421
00:20:41,941 --> 00:20:48,751
♪ where we spent our
early summer days ♪
422
00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:55,688
♪ the hill we climbed
that went on forever ♪
423
00:20:55,688 --> 00:21:01,788
♪ we reached the top
of the world together ♪
424
00:21:01,794 --> 00:21:06,164
♪ yeah, you gave
your love to me ♪
425
00:21:06,165 --> 00:21:09,365
♪ and I remember perfectly ♪
426
00:21:09,369 --> 00:21:13,669
♪ high above all
time and space ♪
427
00:21:13,673 --> 00:21:16,313
♪ and I remember summer days ♪
428
00:21:16,309 --> 00:21:20,179
♪ when you gave
your love to me ♪
429
00:21:20,179 --> 00:21:23,579
♪ and I remember perfectly ♪
430
00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:26,953
♪ high above all
time and space ♪
431
00:21:26,953 --> 00:21:30,723
♪ and I remember summer days ♪
432
00:21:36,929 --> 00:21:43,839
♪ come climb that
hill again with me ♪
433
00:21:43,836 --> 00:21:50,836
♪ come live that
love again with me ♪
434
00:21:50,843 --> 00:21:57,583
♪ baby, baby, baby, baby ♪
435
00:21:57,584 --> 00:22:03,254
♪ hold my hand
and we'll be free ♪
436
00:22:03,255 --> 00:22:06,825
♪ said we'll be free ♪
437
00:22:14,467 --> 00:22:18,597
♪ yeah, you gave
your love to me ♪
438
00:22:18,605 --> 00:22:21,665
♪ and I remember perfectly ♪
439
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:25,484
♪ high above all
time and space ♪
440
00:22:25,478 --> 00:22:28,578
♪ and I remember summer days ♪
441
00:22:28,581 --> 00:22:32,421
♪ when you gave
your love to me ♪
442
00:22:32,419 --> 00:22:35,519
♪ and I remember perfectly ♪
443
00:22:35,522 --> 00:22:39,432
♪ high above all
time and space ♪
444
00:22:39,426 --> 00:22:42,386
♪ and I remember summer days ♪
445
00:22:42,395 --> 00:22:45,955
♪ when you gave
your love to me ♪
446
00:22:45,965 --> 00:22:49,065
♪ and I remember perfectly ♪
447
00:22:49,068 --> 00:22:52,998
♪ high above all
time and space ♪
448
00:22:53,005 --> 00:22:56,065
♪ and I remember summer days ♪
449
00:22:56,075 --> 00:22:58,835
♪ when you gave
your love to me ♪
450
00:22:58,845 --> 00:22:59,945
[applause]
451
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:12,590
[♪♪♪]
452
00:23:12,592 --> 00:23:14,062
Keith: Hey, you about
ready? Danny: I am.
453
00:23:14,060 --> 00:23:15,660
Now you got plenty
of money for peanuts?
454
00:23:15,662 --> 00:23:16,932
Sure do. [Doorbell rings]
455
00:23:16,929 --> 00:23:18,669
I'll get it.
456
00:23:22,334 --> 00:23:24,674
Hi, Reuben. Hi. Where's Keith?
457
00:23:24,671 --> 00:23:26,271
Hey, guess what.
458
00:23:26,272 --> 00:23:27,512
I had to scrounge around,
459
00:23:27,507 --> 00:23:29,607
but I finally
managed to pull it off.
460
00:23:29,609 --> 00:23:33,209
Pull what off? I
got the tickets.
461
00:23:33,212 --> 00:23:34,652
To the bolshoi ballet.
462
00:23:34,647 --> 00:23:36,407
Oh, if you hurry, you can
make it to the matinee.
463
00:23:36,415 --> 00:23:38,875
Well, that's great, Reuben,
but I wish you'd told me sooner.
464
00:23:38,885 --> 00:23:40,885
I'm taking the
kids to the circus.
465
00:23:40,887 --> 00:23:42,987
The circus?
466
00:23:44,691 --> 00:23:47,731
I had to haggle and
finagle to get these tickets.
467
00:23:47,727 --> 00:23:51,157
Keith: Well, why don't
you go? Me? To the ballet?
468
00:23:51,163 --> 00:23:54,533
What's the matter? Don't
you appreciate culture?
469
00:23:54,534 --> 00:23:56,504
Are you kidding? I'm full of...
470
00:23:57,537 --> 00:23:59,667
Culture.
471
00:23:59,672 --> 00:24:01,342
Who... who would
I get to go with me?
472
00:24:01,340 --> 00:24:05,180
I mean, it starts in 40
minutes. Reuben, I'd love to go.
473
00:24:05,177 --> 00:24:07,277
So would I.
474
00:24:07,279 --> 00:24:09,479
You would?
475
00:24:09,482 --> 00:24:10,722
[Clears throat]
476
00:24:10,717 --> 00:24:13,917
Well, I guess it's a date.
477
00:24:15,955 --> 00:24:18,085
What ballet are
you going to see?
478
00:24:18,090 --> 00:24:19,390
Swan lake.
479
00:24:19,391 --> 00:24:25,061
Um, isn't that a little racy?
480
00:24:25,064 --> 00:24:26,504
Swan lake?
481
00:24:26,499 --> 00:24:28,929
What time will you
have them home?
482
00:24:28,935 --> 00:24:30,135
Danny. Come on.
483
00:24:30,136 --> 00:24:31,996
I think we're gonna be late.
484
00:24:32,004 --> 00:24:35,144
Bye. Don't keep
the lions waiting.
485
00:24:35,141 --> 00:24:37,511
I, somehow, get the
feeling he doesn't trust you.
486
00:24:37,510 --> 00:24:40,650
Danny: I'll be
waiting up for you.
487
00:24:40,647 --> 00:24:42,447
[Laughing]
488
00:24:42,448 --> 00:24:44,078
[♪♪♪]
489
00:24:51,257 --> 00:24:52,627
[♪♪♪]
490
00:24:52,677 --> 00:24:57,227
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