All language subtitles for Return.To.Gandhi.Road.2020.1080p.WEBRip.x264-RARBG

I had no expectation.

I just went with an empty mind.

I had no idea what I was going to find.

I didn't have the idea of
going in search of a teacher.

I just needed to solve this one question,

was getting rid of my fear of death.

I didn't feel like
I was meeting a foreigner.

I was just trying to find
someone who had a clue,

who understood what was going on.

And they were so welcoming

and to see these people coming,

who are from a totally different culture

and it was if he was waiting for us.

I hadn't had
anything to do with Buddhism

for 20 years or so.

Poems of long life.

These letters of long life.

Some years ago, Dzongsar
Khyentse Rinpoche,

a Tibetan Buddhist teacher
came to New Zealand

and I met him and he said,

"Well, you should really
go back to India."

And at first I said, "No,
I've left India behind.

"I'm not really interested
in going back to India."

And he asked me several times
and the third time he said,

"And your daughter, she should film it."

And I agreed to do it.

If it meant getting close
to her, well, I would do it.

Well, I was a surfer.

One day I found a book on
Buddhism in the sand hills,

and I knew that I really
wanted to follow that.

It seemed to make a lot of sense to me.

I decided India was the place to go.

So my girlfriend and I headed off to India

and we ended up in Darjeeling.

Through a series of accidents,

we ended up at 54 Gandhi Road

and Kangyur Rinpoche walked up.

He was like no one I'd ever
met before, or since really.

This extraordinary person,

there was nothing
ordinary about him at all.

He had broken fingernails.

He looked like he'd built a
monastery himself that morning.

We stayed in India for five years

and that was, we lived and breathed,

either studying from
Rinpoche in the summer

or studying sitar in the winter

and completing our Buddhist practise.

We went back in 1980 after
Rinpoche had passed away,

back to Darjeeling

and about two weeks into that retreat,

I had a terrible epileptic fit,

which really rocked my faith.

I was flown back to New Zealand

and the doctors gave
me various medications,

which seemed to zone me out somehow.

And I think they pretty much
zoned me out for 30 years.

I was a student.

I didn't want to have the life
that I was seeing around me.

One night I was listening
to the radio in my bed

and then there was a voice saying,

"Mr. Desjardins just
published a book called

"Le Message des Tibetains."

I got up and wrote the title

and it was this meeting
with all these great lamas

who were still alive at that time.

And I was particularly impressed

by what he was saying
about Kangyur Rinpoche.

I hppened to see documentary movies

that our friend Arnaud Desjardins made.

There was a quite shock
moment about Kangyur Rinpoche.

Arnaud told me, among all
the teachers that we met,

we were most inspired and
impressed by Kangyur Rinpoche.

I had six-month holiday between
completing the university

and starting my job at Basta Institute

and then when I saw those movies, I said,

"That's clear and that's where I'm going."

I feel very nervous
going back to India.

Nervous about what I'm gonna face there.

It was one of those
unresolved parts of my life.

My reaction to losing my faith,

really was to bury myself in whatever

I had going on in the West.

Just park it to one side and leave it.

Welcome to
Kolkata, ladies and gentlemen.

I was living in London
doing my clinical studies,

but Charles kept writing.

In those days, we wrote
letters, aerogrammes,

and saying, "You must
come, you would be amazed.

You must meet Kangyur Rinpoche."

And I got a ticket and set off

to spend three or four
weeks in Darjeeling.

I can't tell you how sort
of exciting it seemed.

I ended up in Calcutta
and the worst, worst thing

was that everything was on strike.

The railways were on strike,
the buses were on strike,

and the Indian Airlines was on lockout.

I found myself in the plane

among all kinds of
hippies and weird people.

I was the only one in the plane

who was not wanting to go to the south.

They asked me, "Why do
you want to go there?

"There's nothing in Darjeeling."

There was this cargo
airline called Jumair

which flew incredibly ropey, old planes.

We got into this plane,

there's something wrong
with the back wheel,

so you had to sort of climb up

the central corridor of the plane.

All the windows were cracked
and there were chickens

and crates of tea.

But this felt so exciting,

'cause I finally knew
that I could get there,

but it really seemed kinda of tense.

We managed to take off

and flew for a couple of hours maybe,

and landed in a field somewhere.

And the plane pilot actually got out

and checked our passports

and then he put us all in the bus,

which he drove himself into town.

For many of us, sometimes,
just by looking at a person

who has basically spent their entire life,

in concentration and attention

to values such as love and compassion,

non-duality, empathy,

understanding the world,

not only in its appearance aspect,

but also in its real, what is there.

It immediately sort of inspires you,

gives you comfort, gives you inspiration.

Makes you think that actually

there are really special human being.

Now I'm home.

Kangyur Rinpoche was born on Kham,

which is the east of Tibet.

He was a khampa, what they call a khampa,

who are the kind of tough guys in Tibet.

So he met his root teacher,

Jedrung Rinpoche, as a baby

and from seven years
old became his disciple

and studied from him at
the Riwoche Monastery.

Through and through
was one of the great students

of first Khyentse the Great,

and also Jamgon the Great.

He was great student of
these great teachers.

I'd first heard of Kangyur Rinpoche

when daddy had come back from
a trip to India and he said,

"I've met the most wonderful
human being I've ever met

"and his name was Kangyur Rinpoche."

And after that, it was very strange

'cause the sky seemed more vast after that

and the world was kind of bigger.

And I had this kind of idea
in the back of my mind,

I'd better get there before I die.

So I was all of 17 at that time

and I'd finished my schooling,

so I decided to go to Darjeeling.

Of course it was the middle of winter

and it was not that easy
to find Kangyur Rinpoche

'cause he had just moved.

I arrived down below in the taxi.

I walked up, Matthieu had said,

"There's a curtain in front of the door.

"You just knock on the door."

So I did and the curtain opened,

and this very beautiful face appeared,

and I said...

'cause I knew that was
how everybody called her,

and she said, "Yes."

And she took me in to Rinpoche.

I was kind of shaky and quivering,

and Rinpoche was just sitting there

with the light behind him
and this huge column of books

here and a huge column of books here,

and the whole room was
kind of full of books.

And the only other thing I
remember was this grandad clock

on the back wall that kept
going tick, tick, tick.

I was sitting awkwardly on the floor

with my hands between the legs

and I don't know what to do with it.

And Rinpoche was laughing
at me, just laughing.

I was just there and then
I sort of, what can I do?

Meditation in those days was not something

that you would know in the West.

So basically, I felt inspired
to try to blend my mind,

my little sort of limited,

confused mind, with
the immense wisdom mind

of Kangyur Rinpoche.

Rinpoche was eating momos

and I was sort of sitting there,

not quite daring to look at him

and a momo landed in my lap.

He was throwing something
at me for me to eat.

At the end of the morning,

they bring a little tray
with some rice and vegetable,

cooked in mustard oil.

I remember always the smell of that oil

coming from the kitchen.

That sort of meeting
with Kangyur Rinpoche,

it's hard to say what happened.

I didn't have any mystical experiences.

I just got over my own
incredible tension about it,

but it was really in a way, one of the,

looking back now, it
really just seems like

one of the key moments of my
life, when everything changed.

Kangyur
Rinpoche was 11 years old.

He heard that numbers of students

going to the farther east of Tibet

to meet Lama Mipham Rinpoche.

He was great, great scholar

and not only scholar, one
of the greatest physician,

great astrologer, great musician.

He was really, really incredible teacher.

He told to his mother, that
he's going to go on a trip

to see this great teacher.

His mother gave him

and you can live on it.

So he took that and went.

Lama used to come out when the sun rise,

and he sort of sit outside of his cave

and Mipham said, "Who
is this boy, young boy?"

And the other lamas said
"Oh, this young boy,

"he just followed us."

Then Mipham said, "Do
you know how to read?"

He said, "Yes, more or less."

And he, Mipham gave his
book on (foreign term),

it's his tantra, which has 100,000 names

of (foreign term) he gave.

And Rinpoche read very fast, very clear.

So, lama was so, so impressed.

Great scholars would come out
of young, intelligent boys.

You will become great teacher.

So he gave his own book.

After that, if Kangyur
Rinpoche read once anything,

he will not forget it.

He gained this incredible
memory, part memory.

This is my broken sitar.

It broke a few years ago

and I'm gonna take it
back to get fixed now.

I haven't played seriously for 25 years.

I haven't seen this man in 32 years.

We used to play together.

This is him?

Hello.

How are you, mate?
- How are you?

Looking great.
- So are you.

This is my (foreign term) sitar.

What happened to the..?

It smashed.

I was tuning it up.

So, I was tuning it but just like,

just tune it and bang.

It went like that, I went, oh

Bablu, I became a rock and roll promoter.

The rock and roll scene is
completely another scene.

I had the operation in late 1977,

but I didn't have the
epileptic fit till 1982,

81 up in Darjeeling.

So that was...

How come you didn't contact
me when you were in Australia?

I thought you were gone.

Gone to the heaven.

I was gone.

Nobody, nobody has any idea about this.

We all came to know this he was no more.

Yeah, so then after that no
news, nothing about that.

This is me.

Yeah.

.

Is that you?

No I think it's a female, not you.

So at 14 years old, Jedrung Rinpoche

asked Kangyur Rinpoche to

to complete a three-year retreat.

When he finished, his instructions were

to lead another three-year retreat.

told him
"Now they should enrol

"in the part of monastic
life and then (indistinct).

"First master the ritual and then after

"you can begin to master the chant".

"master the whole monastery".

As much as Kangyur Rinpoche

enjoyed that work,

he really wrestled with the administration

and one morning there was
a note left on his bed

to say, he'd gone.

And he disappeared for 13 years.

He travelled

and he received teaching
from great teachers

and he taught and he teach retreats

and it split completely.

You have the
complete living example,

of what is taught in the teachings.

The messenger is the message.

You see what lies at the
end of the path, right there

in front of you.

Every word, every word you
can guess of his thought,

every action is in
harmony with the teaching,

exemplified the teaching
and amplifies the teaching.

If you are talking from
the Buddhist point of view,

enlightenment is when you finally,

transcend all your obsession.

Your fixation, your judgmental mind,

all your references.

Enlightenment is beyond
time, beyond space.

Enlightened being,

means uses his brain cell up to 100%.

So 100% means, it breaks, it breaks

the boundary of dualistic mind.

Of self others, yes and no

white and black, and to see bad and good,

it becomes equal.

It becomes equanimity.

Also it becomes pure and genuine.

There is no boundary there,

everything is pure wisdom.

No one knows quite where he went,

but when he returned after
13 years, in his thirties,

he had an amazing
knowledge of the Khanjar.

He was constantly requested
to recite the Khanjar,

over a hundred volumes of
it, which could take months.

Because he had
this incredible ability

to read fast and also
he is so knowledgeable

in this subject, so he taught
and he get transmissions.

They say that there's no one who recited

the khanjur more times than
Khanghu Rinpoche, 30 times.

The Khanjur is the actual
scriptures that are

in one sense or another,
the words of the Buddha.

Khanghu Rinpoche received
from many different sources,

the reading transmissions,

he actually heard the
teachings read out by people

who'd heard it from people,
who'd heard it from people.

Who've heard it from people going back

right over the centuries,
right back to the Buddha.

The sound of the teachings
and the fact that

they were recited was terribly important.

Travelled for months and things to receive

a rare transmission from some lineage

that he hadn't already received,

although had received
many, many in the ages,

and then he himself
would transmit khanjur,

so there's this whole thing
of the living tradition

and that there's a direct link between,

the generations of people who'd practised

and studied the texts.

When I met this community
of Westerners in Darjeeling,

most of them were French

and most of them were
really non psychedelic,

non hippy people, professional people

and people that we would have called in

those days straight.

That was a kind of
different kind of community

from what we would have found at the time

in most Buddhist seats.

I couldn't communicate with Rinpoche

in any known language, but it was fine

because he knew anyhow,
what I was thinking.

And I came up every morning to try

and meditate with Rinpoche
which was agonising,

because I didn't know how to meditate.

So Matthieu and Yarn and everybody said,

"You go and sit in front
of him and meditate"

What does that mean?

What do you mediate on?

All of 17 and I hadn't
a clue about anything,

Buddhism or anything.

This isn't gonna work.

So I asked Rinzin lah
who came once in a while

to translate in her sweet way.

I said, "Can you ask Rinpoche

"if there's a way to
start at the beginning".

And gradually I met him again and again

and he gave me some practises to do.

I said to Rinpoche "Can I
do the preliminary practise?"

" But that will take a long
time, at least a year".

I said, "I don't care".

It was really funny
because I had no idea

what was the preliminaries,

what practises I was supposed to do.

I just did it, as if it was
like a natural course of things.

I started the preliminary practise there

and we had to translate the
books from the beginning.

We didn't know anything
and Rinpoche would give

four line teachings and one
would study for a month,

or two or three and then you'd get another

four line teachings.

It was really, drop by drop

and I remember once, Rinpoche said,

"Okay, now you have to
meditate on impermanence".

go back to (indistinct) and I said,

"Okay, I'll mediate on impermanence"

He said, "No, it's not like that,

"you need to meditate on
impermanence for one month".

So that was 18 hours a day,
meditating on impermanence.

Was a kind of direct communication,

even though there was
this language barrier.

What was intriguing was that
while we were doing these

various practises, Matthieu was receiving

a kind of different level of teaching

and he would go and just sit
with Rinpoche in his room

and I thought this would
be great to do that.

So one day I went and I
thought, I'll try this too.

So I sat meditated in front of Rinpoche.

He looked at me and of course,

there was nobody else there,
so we couldn't really converse,

but he pointed me and said

he didn't do like that.

And then he went like this,

just completely relaxed.

So I did the same thing,
just relaxed like this.

Then he relaxed a bit more

and I relaxed a bit more.

And this was a very interesting
way of explaining to me,

without words, this notion
the natural state of the mind,

not an artificial state,

which you create by your
efforts of concentration

and trying to produce something,

but the natural state
that's already there,

which you just have to,

be in.

If you take what we call

or tantric Buddhism,

now here, the concept of spiritual master

is usually altogether different.

Spiritual master is not,

just a master, spiritual
master is the path.

You have to voluntarily choose that path

and if you've chosen that,

you have to remember, it is a journey.

It is an adventure.

So we don't have a
ticket, all three of us

have to get on it and one seat.

Once you have taken this journey,

you have to have a purpose, right?

That you are taking a journey.

It's important that you finish the journey

and the journey can be very, very,

unexpected.

Things can happen.

Kim what are you looking for?

I don't know, we're
looking for a plane ticket.

Because the teacher has
such a clear perception of

all the credible contortions
that we put our minds through,

the kind of emotions and concepts,

and the misperception,

and the twists and things
that we get ourselves into.

And he can see right through all of that,

with that sort of power and
that sort of encouragement

and that reflection that
you get with the teacher,

all of those layers can
be gradually, dispersed.

And that can be a very uncomfortable

process for the student.

Kangyur Rinpoche was
incredibly disciplined.

He was also known for his
personal reconstruction

of stupors and holy places

and in fact, the masons were quite scared

of working with him.

He knew so much and
was such a hard worker.

He was also not afraid to stand up

for the disenfranchised,

or anyone he felt had
been unjustly treated.

Quite amazing because
Rinpoche was everything.

He was an architect

and then when we started
building the monastery,

he was an engineer.

And when we started
painting the monastery,

he was a master painter.

And when we started making the silver

and the gold and the brass elements,

he was a master goldsmith.

And all the time, there
were people coming and going

and asking for medicine

and he'd go out at 3:00
o'clock in the morning

when someone came to get him because

of a member of the family was dying.

It was just, he was everything.

He just knew how to do everything.

It was quite amazing.

Visva-Bharati, the old Bharati

the old Indian style of teaching.

And the Visva-Bharati University,

it is only university in the world

the learning in the company of nature.

Where's (indistinct) ?

That's it there?

Because you couldn't get a permit

to stay for any length
of time in Darjeeling,

Rinpoche sent us down to Shantiniketan

where I could study music
as well as learn Tibetan

with CR Lama, Chimé Rigdzin Lama.

I think his place was over there

and our house was over here somewhere.

We were always aware that
our clock was ticking

and we had very little time here,

so we worked really hard

and we knew that the end was that

we would be able to study from
Kangyur Rinpoche, directly.

Maybe this was the lama's house.

I think it's very
important first of all,

why you are even looking
for a spiritual master?

Is it really because you are interested

in seeking the truth
and the awakened state,

or you are just looking for
some sort of a psychiatrist,

or a comfort zone, or
someone who would confirm

your way of thinking, or a friend,

or a family or something like that,

this is very important.

If you are looking for that guru,

or the spiritual master
really is not the perfect.

All Buddhists care, really,
really the fundamental,

of what Buddhists really care,

is to know

the truth,

everything, meditation,

practise, discipline, whatever you do,

it has to assist and
take you across the true

understanding that truth.

This place over here,

I'm not talking about some
exotic, mysterious truth.

I'm talking about very,

very simple raw truth.

It's this house here.

Oh man,

it seems so,

now it seems like a long time ago.

Such a happy house though.

Chimé Rigdzin Lama

a major part of our life,

a major part of my life for several years.

Really Chime was unusual

and taking in Western students
and not many but some,

and they would actually live
in Darjeeling in the monastery.

It was difficult to
stay there a long time.

Some people managed to sort
of stay there for long times

and they became really
part of the monastery

and almost part of the family.

Khanghu Rinpoche's
wife was known as Amala.

My first meeting with Amalas'

was when she kind of opened the curtain

and I saw this beautiful,
sweet, sweet face.

Although she always looks
like a 16 year old woman,

at any age because she's
so exquisitely beautiful.

Led a very simple life and
always took a very humble role,

but you could always
feel this wonderful power

from her compassion and her wisdom.

She came from a very
well-known political family.

In fact, her mother was the
governess of two provinces.

Her brothers were also politicians,

but she had no wish at all to follow

in the family footsteps.

She was however, completely devoted,

even as a child to the Dharma,

It was predicted by the age of 14

that she would meet her root teacher.

And so at the age of 13,

she travelled through many
sacred spots and monasteries.

And at Sumyeh Temple met Khanghu Rinpoche

for the first time.

So when she was there,
there was great teacher

He said, "You came for pilgrimage"

She said "Yes", "Maybe should
stay and in one weeks time

"there will be great
teacher's who's coming

"and can teach you on Buddha's work.

"This is exceptional, it rarely
happens, you should stay".

So she was really inspired and she asked

"Who's giving this transmission?"

She has said, he was from
monastery's great temple

great line scholar, but now he's known as

Khanghu Rinpoche, because
he's teaching master

and when my mother's
heard Khanghu Rinpoche

she thought I must stay to
receive these teachings.

After three years,

she could receive ordination
from Khanghu Rinpoche.

She became very strict nun.

I think that it would
have a massive impact

on the future, Khanghu
Rinpoche and Alma la

had a family, three sons
and three daughters.

Every time I remember him,
every time I think of him,

it's just somebody so,

there, so present and
not just being present,

but his presence was so accommodating.

So kind, in fact, I remember mostly

Rinpoche as somebody so kind,

at the same time securing.

I felt that I could ask him any question.

Every night, I used to ask
him to tell me stories,

stories about Tibet's greatest,
most accomplished teacher,

like Milarepa.

He used to tell me stories like that,

made me feel really at home

with these great teachers of Tibet.

And when you think of them,

you don't feel them as if they were,

some part of history, but more really like

your grandparents, your uncles.

He had this ability to make me understand,

or feel that the Buddha,

although it was a great
enlightened person,

at the same time,

it didn't feel that they
were so out of reach.

As far as my spiritual path was concerned,

it wasn't introduced to
me as a spiritual path.

It was just life.

I don't feel that they were trying to

convert me to anything,

but it was for them,
the most important thing

and as parents,

I think, any parent would
want to give their children

the most important thing for them.

From that point, I had total confidence

that they were doing that.

I must have tried to go from
one parent to the other,

when I wanted to know things,

but it didn't work with either of them,

because when I wanted to do something,

that my mother wouldn't allow me to do,

I used to go up my father
and then he used to make me

understand how important my mother was,

how important what she
was telling me to do was,

that he really made me
feel and understand that

she really meant the
world, not just to me,

but also to him.

Good news is we have two seats.

We wanted three but we got two.

Paid for three but got one last one.

So we paid three, got two.

If you want to become
a better human being,

who you need to go ?

If you want to learn
how to climb mountains,

you go to see an expert mountain climber.

If you want to cross the ocean,

you go to see an expert sailor

and you learn from that person, the skill.

The main function of the teacher

is to see for you at one particular time

in your life and your degree of maturity,

what will be the best
teaching at that point?

What is mostly transformative,

is the few words that the
teacher would give you

from time to time, to
guide you along the path,

according to your needs,

according to your difficulties,

according to your light and shadows,

so that he can best lead you on the path

without you wasting your time,

or going side tracks,
or being in confusion,

or having a romantic idea
of what the dharma would be,

but just keep you right there

and sometime if it
needs to be a bit strict

so that you don't waste
your time, then it's good.

It doesn't have to police your ego.

What's the use?

We're now on the train
from Boghur to Jaliputuri

'cause we don't know what to expect.

Last time I was on this train was 1974

and it certainly wasn't like this.

It's like a European train.

Quite surprised.

A nice surprise.

That was one of the
first things Rinpoche said

in Darjeeling, that there was a prediction

by Gurum Chai that when the
iron bird flew over Tibet,

Dharma will come to the west.

About five years before the 1959

cultural revolution in Tibet,

Khanghu Rinpoche started having
premonitions about leaving.

Although he was still free to move around

at that time in Lhasa,

things were starting to
change quite quickly.

He wrote to the Dalai Lama asking him

what the Dalai Lama felt he should do.

The Dalai Lama responded by
saying he felt he should go

and that he should also take with him,

a copy of the Kangyur.

Now the Kangyur is every
word the Buddha spoke,

84,000 teachings and manuscript four.

For my father, these
teachings were so precious.

These books were so precious,

that prior to leaving
Tibet, few years before,

whatever wealth my father
had and my mother had,

they sold them in order to buy books,

in order to search for
books and print books

and if they couldn't be printed,

they had them copied.

Thousands and thousands
and thousands of volumes.

We got all
the blanket and bags

everything very nicely and
they took us for one month

There were 200 packages,

something like 18 trucks
within all of that,

they had three little boxes

for their own personal belongings.

When the time came to leave,

they hired two Chinese lorries

and off they set to India.

Kangyur Rinpoche
head south towards Pemako,

an area non for it's incredibly

challenging physical environment.

On the way Ama
la was very very sick,

She has car sick and
not travelling so much.

She has quite sick and then finally

then we would ask to the driver

say if they can drive slowly.

They headed south
as far as they could

until they ran into snow and ice,

unable to drive any further by truck,

so they unloaded everything off the trucks

and 200 porters carried them from there.

The family would
travel as far as they could,

until they ran out of
provisions to pay porters.

So they would set up
a farm, buy some yaks,

lease some land, plants some
crops, harvest the crops,

and then put that towards more
porters, carrying the books.

They first stayed at the monastery

of Jedgral Rinpoche.

Leaving the books at the monastery,

the family made a pilgrimage
to the sacred mountain

.

When I returned to the monastery,

Kangyur Rinpoche went off on his own,

on a two month pilgrimage

into some of the hardest territory.

Many people have died
trying to get in there

but he returned safely.

Kangyur Rinpoche, had a decision to make.

He could either go back to Pemako

to the safety or on to uncertainty

and crossing the Indian border,

people were being killed.

Nevertheless, for the benefit
of all sentient beings,

Kangyur Rinpoche, his family

with all the books crossed
into India in 1960.

He could have very well stayed in Pemako

with his family and the
books would have been safe,

but he took the decision
to bring the books

out of Pemako into India and
he probably knew very well

that there was huge dangers,

because I think 10% of all the Tibetans

who crossed the border

and caught fever and died
within the first month.

He thought that the wisdom
contained in these books

was important for the Western world

and that if he didn't bring them out,

they would be lost because in Tibet,

they were being destroyed
on the very large scale

and no one else had been
able to bring the books out

and there weren't copies outside of Tibet,

except a few in Kalimpong.

So it was really a great act of kindness

and it probably took
huge amount of courage

and foresight.

Wow, look at those mountains.

That's my first view of the Himalayas

40 years.

After staying in a while in Assam,

they moved to cross the Brahmaputra river

and halfway across the boat
driver held them to ransom.

They moved to another camp

and it was there that a
student of Kangyur Rinpoche's

heard of their arrival from Tibet.

Oh look, there's Khachandila.

Holy cow.

Look

man.

That's so rare to see the mountains.

We hardly ever seen them.

Here's the train.

It looks just the same to me.

It's amazing.

When Kangyur Rinpoche first
arrived in Darjeeling,

he stayed at a number of
places looking for a home,

for this vast collection of books.

Each time we moved
cause every two years,

or sometimes even less,

we used to have to move
from one place to other,

because we were renting.

Every time we'd moved,

it would take a week or two to get ready.

When I came back they
had moved to 54 Gandhi Road

whereas some of his
disciples had bought an old

English holiday home.

It was just the ground floor,

beautiful gardens and a much bigger house.

And I think Rinpoche only accepted

to be able to store the books
and get on with his projects

of recopying this and that,

because he really wasn't
into having properties

and things like that.

Between 1960 and 1965

major tensions were being
given by Kangyur Rinpoche,

Dudjom Rinpoche and
Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche.

During the
period of the Darjeeling,

Kangyur Rinpoche still searched out

rare manuscripts and
had his family copy them

to preserve the teachings for the future.

I remember he used to have many people

that he used to pay to copy books.

That is why my brothers and sisters

have very good handwriting,

because he got them all to copy

and not only them, but
he used to copy himself.

And my mother used to do it all day,

thousands and thousands of books.

And then later we'd reproduced

and then we send all over the world.

He put so much effort
into preserving these.

It is really imagine if,

we had all the notes,

of all the scientists,

Western scientists all together.

And if you have their manuscripts

and many of them had not been published,

how preciously would we guard them?

How preciously would we preserve them?

And that is what I think for my father

the importance of these books.

We lived here.

I honestly don't even know where I am now.

This was bush.

The family don't live here anymore.

I don't know what I'll find.

Well this wasn't here.

Wow.

It still smells the same.

It's the same.

Exactly.

We've got some there.

The monks would sit here

and Rinpoche would sit there.

And then either one of them,

Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche
one of the high Rinpoche

sit there and
would sit there.

Turung Rinpoche.

Hello.

Good to see you.

It has been long time.

It has been,

long, long time.

Yeah.

Just how do you?

Rinpoche here he was
sitting on same chair.

This is where some students
who used to come back

to sit and do meditation,

but with the time,

things changed.

Yes.

As you know, Kangyur Rinpoche

passed away long time ago.

And for us, this is a
very important teaching.

Why?

It is inevitable,

the changes in life.

No one can changes after old age,

you can die.

We can all die.

This heart is burden will
always be added to that,

whatever we build, it will
disintegrate sooner or later.

Change, impermanence.

Everything's changing.

It didn't change in one second,

but it's changing.

Old age didn't start in one day,

but every second the skin

So therefore impermanence is
really important for us to know

change is taking place.

That is something nobody can change

and everyone has to experience that.

The last time I came through this door,

I was crystal clear, you
know, really healthy.

And about two weeks into the retreat,

I had an epileptic fit that completely

and utterly knocked me out.

The doctors put me on some
kind of tranquillisers

and insisted that I go back to New Zealand

and get treatment in New Zealand.

I got involved in the music industry,

there didn't seem to
be time for any kind of

Buddhist practise.

I think now that I look back on it,

really missed the passing
of Kangyur Rinpoche.

Really missed his direction. If you like,

and just missed him, really missed him.

I knew that he would know
what was best for me.

I think I've learned about suffering.

I've learned about,

the value, hard as it seems
at the time of suffering.

I'm talking about, you know,

our daily life suffering

and having a leaky building

is suffering and having addictions

is suffering.

And I think if I put them
in a Buddhist framework,

then it's all valuable stuff.

It's been very hard for
me to see it that way.

It's taken a hit,

it's taken a very long time
for me to see it that way,

as this,

the stuff that happens
to you out on the West

as being Buddhist practise.

I think as I've got older,

perhaps I've had a different
view on what's happened

in the last 40 years.

I was in Rio,

and I had, my first
daughter had been born.

All of a sudden,

I had this terrible attack of sadness

and depression.

I thought, this is the baby blues.

It's pretty bad, but it wasn't.

I had this terrible feeling
that I would never again,

have access to the teachings

in the way that I'd had before.

I just couldn't understand
just in tears all day long.

In three days or two days later,

we got a telegram from Darjeeling

saying Rinpoche passed
away, could we come?

My daughter by then, was 10 days old.

So we got our tickets and our visas

and off we went to India.

Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche very kindly

said that he would take
us all as his disciples,

as Dzongsar Rinpoche requested he do so

and we would always have
access to the teaching.

I felt a tremendous
sense of loss and sadness

and I felt that this was
really my connection.

And I thought, what's the
point of going on living

when Rinpoche's not there?

So I came back to the west

and I was working and this and that.

And then when our teachers came here,

I remember being with Jinghu Rinpoche

I said, "I just feel so terrible

"now that Rinpoche is not
there, I feel, difficult".

I said, "How do you feel?"

He said "The same, just the same".

In his very kind of matter of fact way.

I've been asked quite a few times

to try and remember Kangyur Rinpoche

and at first, and for quite
a while, I just couldn't,

I couldn't remember,

but as time has gone on, it's like,

he's become alive again.

I remember him now.

I remember him.

I remember how much like my father he was.

I remember how, what he smelt like.

In January of 75, when
Kangyur Rinpoche passed away,

daddy had decided that he wanted to give

the whole of the castle
to the (indistinct) family

to make it into a library
and a peace centre.

That never happened, but they
did accept his invitation

to come to the region and
Rinpoche had asked me,

he said, "Well where
do you live in France?

And I said, "Well, I live in the Dordogne"

And he says, "Dordogne?

"That sounds like dodgy
den, which is blood Gaia".

He says, "We're here in dorgy lane".

He said, "Okay, I'm going
to build this Varsha bridge

"from Dordogne to dodgy
den to the Dordogne."

So it seemed kind of obvious
to me that this was the place

where everything was going to happen.

Came in 1975
with Digo Khyentse Rinpoche

and he gave teachings in Chartreuse,

La Sandre became his home

but then
things unfolded in the west

because he made sure
that all of the Rinpoche

came at regular intervals.

While these great authentic teachers

from Tibet are still around,

we should do the practise
in an intense way,

so as to be able to
receive their teachings

in a meaningful way.

So this is how they started
these three-year retreats

when there was not really a big
infrastructure or community.

But we built the first four hermitage's

by hand at Chartreuse,

it was quite chaotic because it was,

we were a bunch of hippies, I wasn't,

but most of them were.

One of the key things in the retreat

was actually being able to
study quite intensely the texts

and practises, but we still
had all of this material

in Tibet and very little of it

had been translated when
we started the texts

and Khyentse Rinpoche would translate in

doing this sort of orally
and we would make notes.

And then some of the
practises that we did,

we were mainly doing it in Tibet

and some of us knew a
little bit of Tibetans.

Most of us didn't know much.

And so one person starts to translate ,

or blend notes on something.

Then obviously it makes sense
to share it with the others.

And when we finished the
first three-year retreat,

it began to be the end of the 80s

began to be the great
era of the PC computer

and then we began to see the possibility

of translating, publishing
and producing books ourselves.

From that point
on practise of Dharma

has spread very quickly
in France and in the west.

I mean, Portugal, Finland,
Spain, all over Europe,

they also go to America.

There's so much more to do,

again, this incredible
body of Tibetan literature

is so vast and we've got many, many,

many more really
important texts to work on

and translate.

Kangyur Rinpoche project, maybe 4,000.

I said itself, the goal
of completin khanjur

on the year within 100 years.

And I think it will take that long.

I don't have a vision wide enough

to see how it fits in or Keisha.

I'm sure it's a contingencies
through the propagation

of the teaching to the west and this,

even if it is just the seed,

he tells the far to,

to grow and grow into something
beyond what we can imagine.

Kangyur Rinpoche's
activities were great,

but through his children
becoming more profound, bigger,

greater, more art spread.

They're just,

it's just like the fingers on
the hand of Kangyur Rinpoche

You just kind of feel that their activity,

everything they do.

They're all incredible practitioners

and three of them,
obviously with teachers,

and even though his daughters who are not

not only great teachers, but
they embody the teachings,

every of their actions of
the dedication to the Dharma.

What is interesting about

is that it's always the same atmosphere

as when it was just the family

and us as a sort of extended
family in Darjeeling.

There's no wish to make
things bigger or be famous.

It's always just the
authentic transmission.

Big change has happened
with the Tibetan Buddhism.

They have to move place.

They had their challenge.

Someone like me had no choice,

but to had to go to
somewhere like Fiji island

and that's it, my life has to be there.

And I have given at this
very important treasure

that I have to pass it down.

This treasure that they have
is not designed just for that

particular group is not bound by culture,

or gender or tradition is for everyone.

Most important thing,
you should be certain,

you should be clear what you have to do,

how to face the moment of death.

I think we are
going through a transition

where we have to be careful.

That challenge is for my generation,

Kangyur Rinpoche's generations

have really hold that treasure

pass it to people his job, now this

whatever the treasure
that they have passed,

is getting picked up.

You know, some, oh, this is good.

Oh, this Tibetan thing,
you know, we in the west,

we don't need.

Not only that, there's
something worse happening.

They pick up some of the ideas

and then they package it properly.

And then they claim that
this is their revelation.

They got this idea from somewhere

and never giving credit to the
Buddha and it surprises them.

Actually, I started to
intellectual copyrights

come from the west.

I'm really careful,
not always get inspired

and you're not like attracted
by some glossy pamphlets that

you find in your nearby
new age coffee shop,

chakra as your guide taming the mind.

And so always if you
have another thinking,

okay, be careful here.

Really important.

It was like given you the
key to understand everything

at that time, the teacher
is not just a teacher,

is not someone that's trained, you know,

coming from the Tibetan
plateau, but it's really,

someone always shows you what
you are, what you are just,

and it's totally universal.

I think many of my friends
were surprised and impressed.

They were there, they met somebody that,

that had never met before,

but this person genuinely cared for them.

The person's point of view,

why should we love or care for anyone?

It's not because somebody has been nice ,

because somebody has been cute,

because they are worthy
of it's just anyone who is

suffering, who has pain or suffering.

Who's confused is an object
of compassion, object of love,

object of caring.

And to know that, to have that
kind of care and compassion,

it doesn't just come like that.

Just not just like a
flower popping up suddenly

like a mushroom.

It is something that these
teachers have trained

over and over again.

I've really started to
realise that even though

Kangyur Rinpoche was
seemingly absent from my life,

he was always there,

in some tiny part of me

and therefore I can look back on my life

and it's the things that never made sense,

actually now make sense.

So without almost being conscious of it,

I've been able to take a
journey through the teachings.

When I put the suffering with that lesson,

I have that experience

and that's a way of dealing
with that suffering.

19 year old, Kim hadn't had a
heck of a lot of experience.

I hadn't had a life now,

30 years up the road I've had so much

and so now when I look at the teachings,

I can see this so relevant
to today and onwards.

At that time, it was so exotic.

You know, it was like learning Tibetan

and you know it was all

and not really applying
it to my daily life.

Now I apply it to my daily life.

He's everywhere and he
lives on through his sons.

He's alive and well, and his sons

and I'm yeah

it's really a joy to get to,

to get back into what something
I left behind so long ago

and really very helpful.

Most helpful.

Non-duality what is that?

That's like, if you think I'm a good man,

he may think I'm a bad man.

So the bad men and the
good men is not here.

It's all in your mind.

It does not exist here.

That's the important thing.

But I mean, I'm very
simplifying this a lot,

but it's quite an important, a fish thing.

We think a glass of water is a water,

but a fish doesn't think so,

insisting that a water isn't water to,

billions of fish, not a good idea.

I was just living this kind of life

and I always felt that it was
something missing from that.

I wanted to find something,

but I really wasn't too sure what it was.

This time was so precious.

There was no much things said,

you didn't talk.

You didn't have to, yeah.

But the presence and then the thing,

this is 40 years later, is still here.

Then when the suddenly at
one is just like a pitcher,

I want to just think about it

and the warm feeling comes back.

I have had it starts rolling

from Mount Everest, but very unhuman.

I am very gratitude

I feel very gratitude
meeting such, you know,

great Rinpoche and very lucky

and maybe I can continue my practise

to support or help people in Japan.

That's all.