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1
00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:20,687
[car honking]
2
00:00:20,770 --> 00:00:22,439
-Hey, the guys
and I were thinking... -[sighs]
3
00:00:22,522 --> 00:00:24,107
...of heading to
Mama Macaroni's
4
00:00:24,190 --> 00:00:26,985
Whoo! Those garlic knots slap!
5
00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:29,195
Don't get me wrong.
I love me some Mama Mac's.
6
00:00:29,279 --> 00:00:32,532
That pomodoro turns me
into a pomowhoro,
7
00:00:32,615 --> 00:00:34,117
but one day of pure focus
8
00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:36,661
and we're going to be ready
to terraform Gotham
9
00:00:36,745 --> 00:00:37,996
into paradise.
10
00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:40,290
Uh, so Frank
"rising from the ashes reborn"
11
00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:42,000
wasn't the key? He's floating.
12
00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:44,627
Oh, I'm all-powerful.
13
00:00:44,711 --> 00:00:45,879
Check this shit out.
14
00:00:45,962 --> 00:00:47,213
Hmm, ahh.
15
00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:48,798
-Take that, take all of that!
-[Harley] Wow!
16
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:50,717
Very cool, Frank.
But in this current state,
17
00:00:50,800 --> 00:00:52,427
he can
only pollinate this area.
18
00:00:52,510 --> 00:00:55,680
Please, I can easily get down
with all of Gotham's flora.
19
00:00:55,764 --> 00:00:57,474
No dick mist needed!
You feel me?
20
00:00:57,557 --> 00:01:00,143
Hey, Frank, you're asexual,
so you'd be fucking yourself.
21
00:01:00,226 --> 00:01:01,519
Well, I know I can do that!
22
00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:03,062
Any-hiddly-diddly,
23
00:01:03,146 --> 00:01:05,732
I just need to increase Frank's
seed production tenfold.
24
00:01:05,815 --> 00:01:07,567
And I'm so close.
So if you could just--
25
00:01:07,650 --> 00:01:09,861
He did it! By God, he did it!
26
00:01:09,944 --> 00:01:11,154
Hey, Sy! Sy!
27
00:01:11,237 --> 00:01:13,281
Aye, all this yelling
reminds me
28
00:01:13,364 --> 00:01:16,201
of Kim Jon Il's
real funeral back in '98.
29
00:01:16,284 --> 00:01:18,745
I downloaded Sy
into Catwoman's Smarthome.
30
00:01:18,828 --> 00:01:21,456
He can access
the entire Internet.
31
00:01:21,539 --> 00:01:22,415
Ask him anything.
32
00:01:22,499 --> 00:01:23,833
Who makes the best burger?
33
00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,002
Who won best actor
for the 1991 Olivier's?
34
00:01:26,085 --> 00:01:28,129
The horse, Seabiscuit,
and a gay man.
35
00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:29,255
-Amazing.
-He's good.
36
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:30,673
Ive, ask him something.
37
00:01:30,757 --> 00:01:32,342
Those are also the things
that I wanted to know.
38
00:01:32,425 --> 00:01:34,344
So if you guys could just--
39
00:01:36,846 --> 00:01:40,975
There's 37 other rooms in
this house, I'm just trying a--
40
00:01:41,059 --> 00:01:44,020
[takes a deep breath and sighs]
41
00:01:44,103 --> 00:01:46,314
It's okay, Frank.
I'm fine. I don't need--
42
00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:48,274
Okay, don't stop. That actually
feels really good.
43
00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:50,443
[theme music playing]
44
00:01:53,988 --> 00:01:54,864
-[piercing noise]
-Ahh!
45
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:56,074
[metal music playing]
46
00:01:56,157 --> 00:01:56,991
Oh, my God.
47
00:01:57,075 --> 00:01:58,535
[metal music continues]
48
00:01:58,618 --> 00:02:00,203
[music playing louder]
49
00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:01,120
Harley!
50
00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:03,289
[loud music continues]
51
00:02:07,168 --> 00:02:09,045
What the hell is this?
52
00:02:09,128 --> 00:02:11,965
Uh, just the first practice
of Gotham's soon to be
53
00:02:12,048 --> 00:02:14,884
greatest Progressive
Alien Deathcore Band.
54
00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:17,720
We are called The Blackened
Pains of Zeerathan!
55
00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:20,557
Death of Harroc
can suck both my dicks.
56
00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:23,059
Oh, they're currently
the best PAD band in Gotham.
57
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:25,436
Don't need the acronym
explained or repeated to me,
58
00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:27,522
but it is like a touch loud.
59
00:02:27,605 --> 00:02:29,065
Do you want us to turn it down?
60
00:02:29,149 --> 00:02:31,776
I mean, if it doesn't ruin
the vibe or whatever.
61
00:02:31,860 --> 00:02:33,653
-You know.
-[Harley] There we go.
62
00:02:33,736 --> 00:02:37,115
Hey, Ive, you're going
to kick science's ass!
63
00:02:37,198 --> 00:02:39,409
Yes. Rock on.
64
00:02:39,492 --> 00:02:41,578
[distorted music
and drums playing]
65
00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:42,829
[sighs]
66
00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:45,707
Hmm.
67
00:02:45,790 --> 00:02:48,751
-[Ivy sighs]
-Oh, I'm seeing something.
68
00:02:48,835 --> 00:02:51,504
Wait, I'm saying it's just
you being a little bitch
69
00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:54,007
and not telling Harley
she's being freaking annoying.
70
00:02:54,090 --> 00:02:55,925
Frank, I like
to employ a tactic
71
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:58,636
called judicious transparency
in my relationships.
72
00:02:58,720 --> 00:02:59,929
Yeah, yeah, I heard of that.
73
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:01,431
It's called
being a little bitch.
74
00:03:01,514 --> 00:03:02,932
Hey, a big part
of being in a relationship
75
00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,685
is not always telling
the exact truth.
76
00:03:05,768 --> 00:03:08,021
And that way
you can get what you need
77
00:03:08,104 --> 00:03:09,689
without hurting
anyone's feelings.
78
00:03:09,772 --> 00:03:11,399
Also, I just blew up
our last place,
79
00:03:11,482 --> 00:03:12,775
so I don't really feel like
being the bad guy right now.
80
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,027
[microphone feedback]
81
00:03:14,110 --> 00:03:15,111
-Oh, my God.
-Well,
82
00:03:15,194 --> 00:03:16,529
you better do something
83
00:03:16,613 --> 00:03:18,489
or you're going to blow
this place up, too.
84
00:03:18,573 --> 00:03:20,366
[sighs] Ugh.
85
00:03:21,868 --> 00:03:23,661
♪ Ivy is so smart♪
86
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:26,039
♪ But she's no science wussy♪
87
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,124
♪ And in celebration ♪
88
00:03:28,207 --> 00:03:29,417
♪ I'm gonna eat her puss--♪
89
00:03:29,500 --> 00:03:30,627
Oh, hey, babe.
90
00:03:30,710 --> 00:03:32,045
Yeah! Whoo!
91
00:03:32,128 --> 00:03:33,463
Obviously, and it
goes without saying,
92
00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:35,548
I think it's amazing
that you started a band.
93
00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:37,342
The thing is, um...
94
00:03:38,051 --> 00:03:38,927
[cat meows]
95
00:03:39,969 --> 00:03:42,639
Catwoman just texted me
96
00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:45,350
and she said that
the instruments she stole
97
00:03:45,433 --> 00:03:48,227
when visiting the legendary
Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
98
00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:53,316
induction ceremony in 2012,
are off-limits. Dang it!
99
00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:56,235
Ah! 2012. A great year for me
100
00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:58,947
and my fellow
Cosimo Matassa Stanleys.
101
00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:01,908
Ugh! Catwoman
is such a buzzkill.
102
00:04:01,991 --> 00:04:04,953
Oh, I know! It's like
the buzzkilliest.
103
00:04:05,036 --> 00:04:07,497
If it was up to me,
I would so let you guys
104
00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:10,249
just shred... ass.
105
00:04:10,333 --> 00:04:12,502
But, you know,
she's letting us stay here,
106
00:04:12,585 --> 00:04:13,962
so we just have to accept it.
107
00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:16,005
-Ugh.
-Ugh, stupid rules.
108
00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,341
Yeah, uh. [sighs]
109
00:04:19,634 --> 00:04:21,844
Um, since we
can't play anymore,
110
00:04:21,928 --> 00:04:23,429
could someone get me down?
111
00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,392
[announcer] This election,
stick with the mayor
112
00:04:27,475 --> 00:04:29,978
because he's
sticking it out for us.
113
00:04:31,813 --> 00:04:33,690
We're getting
crushed in the polls!
114
00:04:33,773 --> 00:04:34,899
How is that possible?
115
00:04:34,983 --> 00:04:36,442
Guy can't even piss on his own.
116
00:04:36,526 --> 00:04:37,819
How's he supposed
to run the city?
117
00:04:37,902 --> 00:04:40,029
Eh, he's playing the coma card.
118
00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:43,491
Well, our internals
show 57% of voters
119
00:04:43,574 --> 00:04:44,826
think it's "mean"
120
00:04:44,909 --> 00:04:46,911
you're running against
someone in a coma.
121
00:04:46,995 --> 00:04:48,579
Ah! But the other 43
are with us?
122
00:04:48,663 --> 00:04:51,874
No. 20 said they wish
"you were the one in the coma."
123
00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:53,543
Feels like
an unnecessary detail.
124
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:55,294
And another 15 said,
125
00:04:55,378 --> 00:04:57,547
"I don't get carpool karaoke,
126
00:04:57,630 --> 00:05:00,341
they just sing along
to songs in a car."
127
00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:03,136
Clearly they thought we were
asking about James Corden.
128
00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:05,096
But regardless,
it's not looking good.
129
00:05:05,179 --> 00:05:08,182
All I've done for this city
and this is what I get?
130
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:09,434
Maybe change things up.
131
00:05:09,517 --> 00:05:11,728
Be more Jim
and less Commissioner
132
00:05:11,811 --> 00:05:13,396
Bingo. I need to just get out.
133
00:05:13,479 --> 00:05:14,856
Chat with the youths.
134
00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:16,649
Barbara, you're a cool,
hip, popular young woman.
135
00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,651
Gather up 3,000 of your closest
friends for me to talk to.
136
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:20,194
Dad, I don't really have any...
137
00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,113
That many friends.
138
00:05:22,196 --> 00:05:24,115
Yeah. I could
have guessed that.
139
00:05:24,198 --> 00:05:25,450
Damn it! Ow, my pinkie.
140
00:05:25,533 --> 00:05:27,952
Political campaigns
are won with money.
141
00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:29,954
Uh, what about
great policy and hope?
142
00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:32,373
[laughs] Yeah.
143
00:05:32,457 --> 00:05:35,626
No, we need money,
from the filthiest, richest
144
00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:38,671
pieces of shit
the world has to offer.
145
00:05:38,755 --> 00:05:41,841
Carmine Falcone, Ra's al Ghul,
146
00:05:41,924 --> 00:05:44,052
or if we're really lucky,
147
00:05:44,135 --> 00:05:45,511
Henry Kissinger!
148
00:05:45,595 --> 00:05:46,971
That monster isn't dead yet?
149
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:48,598
God really doesn't exist.
150
00:05:48,681 --> 00:05:51,100
Dad, if you take their money,
you'll be beholden to them.
151
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,102
Run on what you believe in.
152
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:55,021
Justice! Honor!
153
00:05:55,104 --> 00:05:56,481
The rule of law.
154
00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:58,566
You, Jim Gordon, are enough.
155
00:05:58,649 --> 00:06:01,152
Aww. You really
are my north star.
156
00:06:03,529 --> 00:06:05,198
Okay, so where
are these rich assholes?
157
00:06:07,325 --> 00:06:09,410
[lens clicking]
158
00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:11,496
[Ivy humming]
159
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,665
[Harley humming]
160
00:06:14,749 --> 00:06:16,626
[sighs] Harley,
what are you doing?
161
00:06:16,709 --> 00:06:18,669
Oh, don't mind me.
I'm just gonna use Catwoman's
162
00:06:18,753 --> 00:06:21,130
fancy Japanese toilet.
163
00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,257
Have you read it? I haven't
gotten past the cover.
164
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,468
Is it "I Q Eight Four"?
165
00:06:25,551 --> 00:06:27,428
[Toilet] Konnichiwa,
Harley Quinn.
166
00:06:27,512 --> 00:06:29,472
-[mechanical sounds]
-Level.
167
00:06:29,555 --> 00:06:30,807
-Level.
-Ah.
168
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,141
-[laughs]
-[Toilet] I'll do that for you.
169
00:06:32,225 --> 00:06:33,101
[shrieks]
170
00:06:33,184 --> 00:06:35,019
Are you ready to flush?
171
00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:36,646
[Harley screams]
172
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:38,981
-[under breath] Oh, my God.
-[Toilet] Victory! S-level.
173
00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:40,900
That was spiritual.
174
00:06:40,983 --> 00:06:42,693
Everyone's gotta try this.
175
00:06:42,777 --> 00:06:45,363
-Hey, guys--
-Oh, no.
176
00:06:45,446 --> 00:06:46,989
Another text from Catwoman,
177
00:06:47,073 --> 00:06:50,326
says no one is allowed to use
her special toilet. Ever!
178
00:06:50,409 --> 00:06:51,953
Wait, how did she even know?
179
00:06:52,036 --> 00:06:53,830
Uh, so she has, like,
180
00:06:53,913 --> 00:06:56,040
surveillance cameras
like, everywhere.
181
00:06:56,124 --> 00:06:57,708
I'm so bummed.
182
00:06:57,792 --> 00:07:00,169
I want nothing more
than for all of you
183
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,630
to just go
to the bathroom right near me.
184
00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:04,632
Ahh, stupid Catwoman!
185
00:07:04,715 --> 00:07:06,884
What is the point
of a fancy Japanese toilet
186
00:07:06,968 --> 00:07:10,680
if you don't show it off? Argh.
187
00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:13,558
Oh, that's some weak ass shit.
188
00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:16,352
[inhales and sighs]
189
00:07:16,435 --> 00:07:18,688
[groans] That feline freak.
190
00:07:18,771 --> 00:07:20,189
Watching my every move.
191
00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:24,026
Your free cam show
ends right now!
192
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:24,986
Argh!
193
00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:29,699
[static sound]
194
00:07:30,908 --> 00:07:32,326
[groans]
195
00:07:32,410 --> 00:07:33,786
[pants heavily]
196
00:07:34,495 --> 00:07:36,205
[laughs]
197
00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:39,041
-[plays piano key]
-[cat meows]
198
00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:41,085
I did it! Whoo!
199
00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:42,795
You diddled
an electrical socket?
200
00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:46,174
What? No! I finished the serum.
201
00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,508
-Huzzah!
-All right.
202
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:48,634
-Feels good.
-Kudos!
203
00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:50,469
-Pollination!
-Feels good.
204
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,555
Oh, I'm so proud of you,
my sexy little scientist.
205
00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:54,348
But seriously,
what is with the hair?
206
00:07:54,432 --> 00:07:57,143
Turns out I made the serum
less explodie,
207
00:07:57,226 --> 00:07:59,103
but not not explodie.
208
00:07:59,187 --> 00:08:01,314
So, Frank's
currently in a fugue state,
209
00:08:01,397 --> 00:08:03,482
producing enough pollen
to cover all of Gotham.
210
00:08:03,566 --> 00:08:05,860
And since we have a couple
of hours before he's ready,
211
00:08:05,943 --> 00:08:08,863
I thought that we would go
for a celebratory dinner
212
00:08:08,946 --> 00:08:10,656
at Mama Macaroni's!
213
00:08:10,740 --> 00:08:12,158
-Whoo-hoo!
-Mama Macaroni's?
214
00:08:12,241 --> 00:08:14,076
[all] Mama Macaroni's!
215
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,578
-[singing]
♪ Coming into my mouth ♪ -♪ Her mouth ♪
216
00:08:15,661 --> 00:08:17,246
♪ Mama Macaroni's ♪
217
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:19,582
-♪ Get in the town ♪
-♪ So good. ♪
218
00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:21,125
-Okay.
-Ah, yes.
219
00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:23,544
Tomorrow we terraform
all of Gotham,
220
00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:25,546
except for Mama Macaroni's.
221
00:08:25,630 --> 00:08:26,797
-Ah, yes.
-Mm-hmm.
222
00:08:26,881 --> 00:08:28,132
I'm gonna bring Frank
his garlic knots.
223
00:08:31,677 --> 00:08:32,511
Frank?
224
00:08:35,514 --> 00:08:36,432
Frank!
225
00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:40,645
Hmm.
226
00:08:43,439 --> 00:08:45,149
-[snoring]
-Sy! Wake up, Sy!
227
00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:47,235
-[mumbling]
-Did you see anything?
228
00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:49,111
I'm plugged in
to the World Wide Web.
229
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,447
What haven't I seen.
Biggest revelation.
230
00:08:51,530 --> 00:08:53,783
A lot of stepmothers
are shtupping their stepson.
231
00:08:53,866 --> 00:08:55,368
No, you horny smoke alarm.
232
00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:57,870
Someone stole Frank.
Did you see anything?
233
00:08:57,954 --> 00:09:01,749
I did not but I will
check the security cameras.
234
00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:02,917
I never should have left.
235
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,126
I never should've
fricking left.
236
00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:05,628
Oh, Ive,
237
00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,797
we are going to find
the asshole who did this, okay?
238
00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:08,881
I promise.
239
00:09:08,965 --> 00:09:10,007
-[beeps]
-[Sy] Is there a villain
240
00:09:10,091 --> 00:09:12,218
who looks like a static screen?
241
00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:13,594
I don't think so.
242
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:15,554
Damn. Well, then
the cameras are broken.
243
00:09:15,638 --> 00:09:16,472
What?
244
00:09:18,432 --> 00:09:19,642
So, whoever broke in knew
245
00:09:19,725 --> 00:09:20,810
exactly where
all the cameras were.
246
00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:23,562
Wow, that is some devious shit.
247
00:09:23,646 --> 00:09:25,982
I think we're
dealing with a genius.
248
00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:27,733
They may be smart
when breaking in,
249
00:09:27,817 --> 00:09:30,611
but they're not smart when
it comes to securely fastening
250
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:32,655
festive brooches
to their wardrobe.
251
00:09:32,738 --> 00:09:34,573
Wait a second.
I've seen this before.
252
00:09:35,741 --> 00:09:37,410
[gasps] And I know
who can help us.
253
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,289
How'd you come up
with the answer?
254
00:09:41,372 --> 00:09:42,748
I don't know.
255
00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:45,251
Maybe because my son
can count to fricking seven!
256
00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:47,211
I hate this common core!
257
00:09:49,380 --> 00:09:50,506
[chuckles]
258
00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:52,049
No, you keep going, sport.
259
00:09:52,133 --> 00:09:53,926
Papa needs to talk
with his guests,
260
00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:57,305
who decided to drop in
during homework time.
261
00:09:57,388 --> 00:09:59,390
Someone broke into our place
and stole Frank,
262
00:09:59,473 --> 00:10:00,725
but left this behind.
263
00:10:00,808 --> 00:10:03,102
And it is
the same brooch you had.
264
00:10:03,185 --> 00:10:04,770
Ugh, The Court of Owls?
265
00:10:04,854 --> 00:10:07,273
What is that? Is that
like a bird watching club?
266
00:10:07,356 --> 00:10:08,733
Ha! They wish!
267
00:10:08,816 --> 00:10:12,320
It used to be the city's
most exclusive secret society.
268
00:10:12,403 --> 00:10:15,197
Bankrolled some
intensely evil schemes.
269
00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:18,409
Now, it's just a bunch
of old straight white dudes
270
00:10:18,492 --> 00:10:20,661
jerking each other off.
271
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,413
Headphones, Benny!
272
00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:23,873
Where can we find them?
273
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:25,958
Assuming they haven't
changed their schedule,
274
00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:28,210
they'll be having their
weekly meeting tonight.
275
00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:29,879
Wednesday nights?
You always told me
276
00:10:29,962 --> 00:10:31,047
you were playing softball.
277
00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:32,715
[laughs] I was lying.
278
00:10:32,798 --> 00:10:34,884
What grown man
plays on a softball team?
279
00:10:34,967 --> 00:10:36,260
So, how do we
get into this meeting?
280
00:10:36,344 --> 00:10:38,679
You just need a mask
and the password.
281
00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:40,431
Lucky for you, I have both.
282
00:10:40,514 --> 00:10:41,766
Hmm.
283
00:10:41,849 --> 00:10:43,100
Here we are. Hmm.
284
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,102
Saves me a trip to Goodwill.
285
00:10:45,186 --> 00:10:46,062
And what's the password?
286
00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:48,814
The password is...
287
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,358
"Hoot hoot."
288
00:10:50,441 --> 00:10:52,401
Seriously? That's like using
your name as the password.
289
00:10:52,485 --> 00:10:55,321
Harley, you literally use
your name for every password.
290
00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:56,280
Are you finished?
291
00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,908
Well, let's take a look.
292
00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:02,119
Draw a picture
to explain your answer.
293
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:03,746
Who gives a shit?
294
00:11:03,829 --> 00:11:05,581
Ha!
295
00:11:05,664 --> 00:11:08,709
Oh, sorry, bud,
I had to get that out.
296
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:10,044
I'll make it up to you.
297
00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:12,588
What do you say
we get some boba?
298
00:11:12,671 --> 00:11:14,548
[dramatic music playing]
299
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:17,218
You really think one of these
sick assholes has Frank?
300
00:11:17,301 --> 00:11:18,803
Yes. Just play it cool, okay?
301
00:11:20,137 --> 00:11:22,139
[music intensifies]
302
00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:24,016
Hoot Hoot.
303
00:11:31,148 --> 00:11:34,110
Eyes open for anything
suspicious.
304
00:11:34,193 --> 00:11:36,362
[hooting noise]
305
00:11:38,697 --> 00:11:41,659
Okay, everything's already
suspicious.
306
00:11:41,742 --> 00:11:43,828
[hooting continues]
307
00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:51,252
It is time for
the sacrifice, but,
308
00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:53,796
before we get to that,
just a quick announcement.
309
00:11:53,879 --> 00:11:56,465
Due to a number of complaints
from our newer members
310
00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:58,467
about the inhumane sacrifices
311
00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:02,138
we have been performing
for over 100 years,
312
00:12:02,221 --> 00:12:06,559
a goat pinata will play
the role of an actual goat tonight.
313
00:12:06,642 --> 00:12:08,144
-[High Owl] I know, I know.
-[man] Favorite part...
314
00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:10,438
There was nothing I could do.
Okay, here we go.
315
00:12:12,231 --> 00:12:13,441
[screams]
316
00:12:13,524 --> 00:12:15,067
[laughing maniacally]
317
00:12:16,652 --> 00:12:19,488
Now that the God's bloodlust
has been satiated,
318
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,782
we're gonna jump right
into cocktail hour.
319
00:12:21,866 --> 00:12:24,285
Okay, so let's just split up
and search the crowd.
320
00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:27,163
Whoever stole Frank has to be
covered in his pollen.
321
00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,789
So let's see if it's one of
these creeps.
322
00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:32,084
You're still hot when you
give orders. Mmm.
323
00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:36,464
All right, just go in there
and charm the hell out of those rich dicks.
324
00:12:36,547 --> 00:12:38,549
Wish you told me
about the mask thing.
325
00:12:38,632 --> 00:12:41,427
Would've worn my sports
goggles from by b-ball days at the rec center.
326
00:12:41,510 --> 00:12:43,512
Forget about
your God damn glasses.
327
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,181
Focus on the mission at hand!
328
00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:46,599
Get that money.
329
00:12:46,682 --> 00:12:49,018
Got it. Just gonna glad-hand
the hell out of...
330
00:12:49,101 --> 00:12:51,103
God dam, son of a-- Gun.
331
00:12:53,022 --> 00:12:54,106
-[grunts]
-Hey, watch it.
332
00:12:54,190 --> 00:12:55,024
[glass shatters]
333
00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:56,567
[indistinct chatter]
334
00:12:57,651 --> 00:13:00,946
Hey, Mr. Owl Man.
Jim Gordon here.
335
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:02,406
I'm running for
Mayor of Gotham.
336
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:03,741
We're not supposed to
use names.
337
00:13:03,824 --> 00:13:05,701
Oh! Right, right, right.
338
00:13:05,784 --> 00:13:07,953
Eh, you already know who I am.
So, like I said,
339
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:10,122
Jim Gordon, running for Mayor.
340
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:12,416
Crime's rampant and the current
mayor isn't doing a dosh garn thing about it!
341
00:13:12,500 --> 00:13:14,543
-Isn't he in a coma?
-Eh, irrelevant.
342
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,671
This damn mask! It does...
It doesn't fit.
343
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:20,549
I think my head's too small?
Too... too big?
344
00:13:20,633 --> 00:13:21,926
[gasps]
345
00:13:22,009 --> 00:13:23,844
Wait a rotten ham-hawk,
I know that jaw-line.
346
00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:26,847
That stiff upper lip,
those broad shoulders that look like
347
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,974
they're holding the weight of
the world.
348
00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:32,061
Bruce Wayne. God, it's good to
see a familiar face
349
00:13:32,144 --> 00:13:35,147
-[sighs] Commissioner.
-My God, those shoulders really are so solid.
350
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:38,108
Guess I shouldn't be too
surprised to see you at this chichi shindig.
351
00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:40,486
I like to keep my eye on
Gotham's elite.
352
00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:43,572
Speaking of Gotham, I'm gonna
change the city and I could really use some of that sweet,
353
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,366
sweet cash that you got
in your pocket.
354
00:13:45,449 --> 00:13:48,369
Also, not to brag, but my good
friend Batman has endorsed me.
355
00:13:48,452 --> 00:13:50,829
-No, he hasn't.
-Well, he hasn't announced it yet,
356
00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,915
but it's coming.
Don't you worry.
357
00:13:52,998 --> 00:13:56,418
Gonna figure this mask out then
I'll circle back with you.
358
00:13:58,504 --> 00:14:02,258
Hey, just out of curiosity,
what were you doing about two hours ago?
359
00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:03,676
Teaching my kindergarten class.
360
00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:05,386
Oh, wow,
that's really upsetting.
361
00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:09,932
Hey, I know it was you, Bane.
362
00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:12,393
[clears throat] Who is this
Bane you speak of?
363
00:14:12,476 --> 00:14:16,021
Never heard of him.
Though, he does sound like a pretty cool dude.
364
00:14:16,105 --> 00:14:19,275
Oh, cut the shit. What were you
doing from 5:00 p.m. until now?
365
00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:23,904
Well, 5:00 p.m. on Wednesday
is my standing therapy session.
366
00:14:23,988 --> 00:14:27,658
It was a tough one.
Got into some trust issues.
367
00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:28,909
I think you know why.
368
00:14:30,369 --> 00:14:33,956
You won't give me back
my pasta maker.
369
00:14:34,039 --> 00:14:36,792
-The ultimate betrayal!
-[toilet flushing]
370
00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:39,962
My therapist thinks
we would all benefit
371
00:14:40,045 --> 00:14:41,964
from a group session--
Oh, okay.
372
00:14:42,047 --> 00:14:44,925
So you can use any toilet you
want, but I can't use yours?
373
00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:46,594
Good to see you, too.
374
00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:48,929
But I haven't the faintest idea
what you're talking about.
375
00:14:49,013 --> 00:14:52,474
I know all about you texting
Ivy telling her I can't do anything in your apartment
376
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,810
including use your fancy
Japanese toilet.
377
00:14:54,893 --> 00:14:58,564
[laughs] What would be
the point of stealing a Komon Clean 6000
378
00:14:58,647 --> 00:15:00,316
if I didn't want to
show it off?
379
00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:01,859
Wh-- That's what I said!
380
00:15:01,942 --> 00:15:06,655
Hmm, seems like your problem
might be with Ivy, not me.
381
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,365
I... Ivy lied to me?
382
00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:11,243
[cell phone ringing]
383
00:15:11,327 --> 00:15:13,495
-King?
-Why thank you.
384
00:15:13,579 --> 00:15:15,039
Got a clue on our thief.
385
00:15:15,122 --> 00:15:17,166
Okay, 'cause we have not
found shit.
386
00:15:17,249 --> 00:15:18,959
Not every camera was broken.
387
00:15:19,043 --> 00:15:22,171
Our fancy, sexy toilet
has one inside
388
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:24,298
and snapped a butt pic
of the intruder.
389
00:15:24,381 --> 00:15:28,552
Hang on, so someone broke in,
stole Frank, and took a shit?
390
00:15:28,636 --> 00:15:31,013
I cannot confirm
it was in that order.
391
00:15:31,096 --> 00:15:34,391
Anyway, I did a zoom zoom
and enhanced the tuchus photo.
392
00:15:34,475 --> 00:15:35,976
-Sending it now.
-[cell phone chimes]
393
00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:38,187
[Gags] Is that a mole?
394
00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:39,229
[Sy] Bingo!
395
00:15:39,313 --> 00:15:41,357
And this is all you could find?
396
00:15:41,440 --> 00:15:44,318
Pretty good, considering
Harley bashed in the rest of the cameras.
397
00:15:44,401 --> 00:15:46,528
Wait, what?
398
00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:51,283
[shouting] Pretty good,
considering Harley bashed in the rest of the cameras!
399
00:15:51,367 --> 00:15:53,160
Huh, see this?
I'm a problem solver.
400
00:15:53,243 --> 00:15:55,996
And I'll bring this kind of
ingenuity all the way to City Hall.
401
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,873
Jim, if I give you money,
will you leave me alone?
402
00:15:57,956 --> 00:16:00,167
-You betcha.
-Let me get my checkbook.
403
00:16:00,250 --> 00:16:02,378
[grunts]
404
00:16:02,461 --> 00:16:05,673
So Sy just told me something
really interesting.
405
00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:07,383
-Oh, really?
-Yeah.
406
00:16:07,466 --> 00:16:11,095
That you went full-blown
smashey fit on all of the cameras.
407
00:16:11,178 --> 00:16:14,181
Well, Catwoman told me
the truth about you guys.
408
00:16:14,264 --> 00:16:17,851
Uh... [sighs] So messed up.
409
00:16:17,935 --> 00:16:20,270
Can we please get out of here
before the party gets started?
410
00:16:20,354 --> 00:16:22,981
Oh, I'd say the party has
already started.
411
00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:24,650
[indistinct conversation]
412
00:16:24,733 --> 00:16:26,902
Fine. Get our coats.
413
00:16:26,985 --> 00:16:31,198
I want to luxuriate
in their emotional discord for a second.
414
00:16:31,281 --> 00:16:32,908
Why would you lie to me
about that?
415
00:16:32,991 --> 00:16:37,121
I... I didn't lie about it,
I just didn't say anything.
416
00:16:37,204 --> 00:16:40,290
And look, the last time
we hooked up was, like, four years ago.
417
00:16:40,374 --> 00:16:41,417
Wait, what?
418
00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:44,586
Oh! Okay, we can go.
419
00:16:45,713 --> 00:16:46,755
[glass shattering]
420
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:48,507
You two used to hook up?
421
00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:50,342
I was talking about
the toilet texts,
422
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:53,595
but you and that furball
used to hook up?
423
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,431
Let's talk about that!
424
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:57,433
-Harley...
-Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
425
00:16:57,516 --> 00:17:00,185
You don't get to "Harley" me.
Is there anyone else I should know about?
426
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:03,856
Any more shocking sex things
I'm gonna be blindsided with?
427
00:17:03,939 --> 00:17:05,274
[thudding]
428
00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:07,234
-What the hell?
-[eerie music playing]
429
00:17:12,030 --> 00:17:16,660
Let the grand owl orgy begin!
Hoot, hoot!
430
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:18,912
[all] Hoot, hoot!
431
00:17:19,705 --> 00:17:20,914
[whirring]
432
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,760
[woman moaning]
433
00:17:33,927 --> 00:17:35,846
[all moaning]
434
00:17:36,972 --> 00:17:38,640
[speaking indistinctly]
435
00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:48,358
Honey, let's just forget about
all of this and focus in.
436
00:17:48,442 --> 00:17:50,944
Whoever stole Frank
has this butt mole.
437
00:17:51,028 --> 00:17:52,321
We find this butt mole,
438
00:17:52,404 --> 00:17:54,656
and then we can just drop this
whole thing.
439
00:17:54,740 --> 00:17:57,493
Ooh, there's always a butt mole
whenever we need to talk about something important.
440
00:17:57,576 --> 00:18:00,746
There's nothing more important
to me right now than finding Frank.
441
00:18:00,829 --> 00:18:02,164
There's nothing to talk about.
442
00:18:02,247 --> 00:18:05,000
Sorry to eavesdrop,
but if I'm being honest,
443
00:18:05,083 --> 00:18:08,378
it seems like there is
a lot to talk about.
444
00:18:08,462 --> 00:18:09,421
[grunting]
445
00:18:09,505 --> 00:18:11,340
This part's always tricky.
446
00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:14,426
Could one of you gals help me
to unhook my--
447
00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:16,178
-[both] Not now, Bane.
-[Bane] Oh, okay.
448
00:18:16,261 --> 00:18:18,013
It didn't mean anything,
it was ages ago.
449
00:18:18,096 --> 00:18:20,891
Look, we've got this extremely
convenient gift of nakedness.
450
00:18:20,974 --> 00:18:23,268
Now let's just go
and find this mole.
451
00:18:23,352 --> 00:18:25,729
If it didn't mean anything then
why didn't you tell me?
452
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:29,233
Maybe I didn't tell you
because I knew this is how you'd react.
453
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:33,237
Wow. Just wow.
454
00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:37,282
[exhales] Shit!
455
00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:38,534
[water running]
456
00:18:38,617 --> 00:18:40,369
[sigh] Come on, Jimbo,
you got this.
457
00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:42,079
Just talk to a few more people
458
00:18:42,162 --> 00:18:43,872
-and your campaign's
back on track. -[toilet flushing]
459
00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,874
Hmm, first-time jitters?
460
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,918
Uh, let me give you
a piece of advice.
461
00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:49,837
Lube, and plenty of it.
462
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:52,965
Right, gotta grease the wheels,
butter 'em up.
463
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,469
Why the-- Ow, why is it so
God damn dark in here?
464
00:18:57,553 --> 00:19:00,556
Looking for money and these
assholes can't even keep the electricity on.
465
00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:01,807
[yells]
466
00:19:02,975 --> 00:19:04,518
Ah, cheesenuts.
467
00:19:06,854 --> 00:19:08,480
The hell is this?
Some kind of Conga line?
468
00:19:19,825 --> 00:19:21,577
Where the hell is it?
469
00:19:21,660 --> 00:19:23,537
Ah, for crying out loud.
470
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:25,414
Harley...
471
00:19:25,497 --> 00:19:27,082
-[goat bleating]
-[crowd moaning]
472
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,422
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
473
00:19:35,299 --> 00:19:37,259
The real reason
I didn't tell you
474
00:19:37,342 --> 00:19:40,846
wasn't because I thought
you'd freak out.
475
00:19:40,929 --> 00:19:45,309
When Catwoman and I hooked up,
I wanted more,
476
00:19:45,392 --> 00:19:48,061
even though it was so obvious
she didn't.
477
00:19:48,145 --> 00:19:50,647
[scoffs] And so,
I waited around,
478
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,566
hoping that she'd
change her mind.
479
00:19:52,649 --> 00:19:55,152
And while I waited,
I was just, like, wrapped around her little finger
480
00:19:55,235 --> 00:19:57,404
and I still cringe every time
I think about it.
481
00:19:57,487 --> 00:20:00,574
Could you please keep your
talking to a dull sexy roar?
482
00:20:00,657 --> 00:20:01,909
-[grunts]
-[groans]
483
00:20:01,992 --> 00:20:04,077
No! Annihilate my taint.
484
00:20:04,161 --> 00:20:05,537
[wheezing]
485
00:20:05,621 --> 00:20:09,124
Anyway, after it finally ended
I felt so pathetic.
486
00:20:09,207 --> 00:20:12,419
I never wanted to think about
it again, and so when you brought it up
487
00:20:12,502 --> 00:20:15,923
I just got defensive and I said
something I shouldn't.
488
00:20:16,006 --> 00:20:18,842
[sighs] Harley, it wasn't
even a real relationship
489
00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:22,262
and I know that because
when we got together,
490
00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:26,975
I knew I'd finally found
what I'd been pining for
491
00:20:27,059 --> 00:20:29,186
all these years.
492
00:20:29,269 --> 00:20:31,647
Catwoman didn't mean
a thing to me.
493
00:20:31,730 --> 00:20:36,026
But you, you, Harley,
you mean everything.
494
00:20:37,027 --> 00:20:38,487
Oh.
495
00:20:39,738 --> 00:20:41,490
[moaning]
496
00:20:41,573 --> 00:20:43,825
[people shouting]
497
00:20:43,909 --> 00:20:47,663
One rule at orgies,
never turn the lights on.
498
00:20:47,746 --> 00:20:51,625
But I was almost done
carbo-loading for the fuckfest.
499
00:20:53,293 --> 00:20:54,670
[smacking]
500
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,422
[crowd moaning]
501
00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:00,175
Ah, hot damn!
502
00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:08,183
What in Satan's asshole?
503
00:21:08,266 --> 00:21:11,144
So you didn't get anyone to
donate to the campaign?
504
00:21:11,228 --> 00:21:14,439
No. But I did get a pretty
sweet selfie with Bruce Wayne.
505
00:21:14,523 --> 00:21:15,941
Maybe put it on a billboard!
506
00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:18,485
Hold on, there's a better one.
507
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:22,030
Huh, I don't remember
taking those.
508
00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:27,452
[laughs] Oh. Gordon,
you brilliant buffoon!
509
00:21:27,536 --> 00:21:30,038
There's only one thing better
than money.
510
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,540
-Love of a woman?
-What?
511
00:21:31,623 --> 00:21:33,250
No. Blackmail.
512
00:21:33,333 --> 00:21:37,212
And now we have videos
of every major player in Gotham
513
00:21:37,295 --> 00:21:39,131
at some weird
sex cult! [laughs]
514
00:21:39,214 --> 00:21:41,550
So that means we can put
the selfie on a billboard?
515
00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:44,219
Oh, that and so much more.
516
00:21:44,302 --> 00:21:46,096
[laughing]
517
00:21:47,305 --> 00:21:48,473
[humming]
518
00:21:50,142 --> 00:21:52,102
[groans] Why the fuck
would they do this
519
00:21:52,185 --> 00:21:53,729
on a concrete floor? [sighs]
520
00:21:53,812 --> 00:21:55,981
I want you to be completely
honest with me
521
00:21:56,064 --> 00:21:58,358
and I will be completely
honest with you.
522
00:21:58,442 --> 00:22:00,569
Here, I'll tell you everyone
I've ever hooked up with.
523
00:22:00,652 --> 00:22:01,903
I'll go from
grossest to hottest.
524
00:22:01,987 --> 00:22:03,655
-Oh, please don't do that.
-Oh.
525
00:22:03,739 --> 00:22:05,407
I'm so glad we worked through
this and everything's okay.
526
00:22:05,490 --> 00:22:08,118
-I mean,
Frank is still missing. -Oh, right, Frank.
527
00:22:09,578 --> 00:22:12,748
Oh, hey. What the... [gasps]
528
00:22:12,831 --> 00:22:16,668
Oh, fuck me! Fuck me!
529
00:22:17,878 --> 00:22:19,963
[theme music playing]
530
00:22:20,013 --> 00:22:24,563
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