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1
00:00:00,078 --> 00:00:00,868
Okay, honey,
2
00:00:00,922 --> 00:00:02,843
doorbell's installed.
How's it sound?
3
00:00:02,921 --> 00:00:05,554
Welcome to hell !
Ooh, ha, ha, ha ha...
4
00:00:05,690 --> 00:00:07,561
That is so cute!
5
00:00:07,682 --> 00:00:09,679
Can you come in here
and help me with this web?
6
00:00:09,766 --> 00:00:11,626
Sorry,
gotta fly.
7
00:00:11,713 --> 00:00:13,570
I'm gonna do that one again
when there's more people around.
8
00:00:13,657 --> 00:00:15,821
Okay. So, you got to
put that up on the hook
9
00:00:15,908 --> 00:00:17,445
because the trick-or-treaters
are gonna be here
10
00:00:17,532 --> 00:00:19,338
- any minute.
- I'm caught.
11
00:00:19,425 --> 00:00:21,226
- Don't pull. It's just gonna get...
- Oh.
12
00:00:21,313 --> 00:00:22,424
Worse.
13
00:00:22,525 --> 00:00:24,609
- No, I can, uh...
- N... Stop moving.
14
00:00:24,696 --> 00:00:26,280
I'm gonna get
some scissors.
15
00:00:30,861 --> 00:00:32,288
Hey, Jerry.
16
00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:33,913
What's wrong?
17
00:00:34,627 --> 00:00:35,807
When?
18
00:00:36,038 --> 00:00:37,346
How?
19
00:00:37,755 --> 00:00:39,136
Oh, thank God
you're back.
20
00:00:39,223 --> 00:00:41,218
There's a real spider in here,
and it's getting closer.
21
00:00:41,305 --> 00:00:43,632
That was Jerry,
my mom's husband.
22
00:00:43,719 --> 00:00:46,241
- Is everything okay?
- No.
23
00:00:46,683 --> 00:00:48,936
- My mom's dead.
- What?
24
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:56,074
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25
00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:03,469
*MODERN FAMILY*
Season 10 Episode 05
26
00:01:03,547 --> 00:01:05,187
*MODERN FAMILY*
Episode Title: "Good Grief "
27
00:01:05,908 --> 00:01:07,857
I can't believe
Nana's gone.
28
00:01:08,190 --> 00:01:10,079
If God really is an old white guy,
29
00:01:10,166 --> 00:01:11,570
he's about to get an earful.
30
00:01:11,657 --> 00:01:13,085
Oh, my God, Claire.
31
00:01:13,172 --> 00:01:14,460
Mitchell.
32
00:01:15,903 --> 00:01:17,293
- Uh...
- Wait, can you...
33
00:01:17,380 --> 00:01:18,462
- I think...
- I don't know how to...
34
00:01:18,549 --> 00:01:21,087
- Help. Please help. Thank you.
- Oh!
35
00:01:24,192 --> 00:01:25,739
All right.
36
00:01:25,950 --> 00:01:27,332
Who are you supposed to be?
37
00:01:27,419 --> 00:01:28,690
Ah, I'm Pr... I'm Prince Harry.
38
00:01:28,777 --> 00:01:30,393
Oh, does that mean Cam is...
39
00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:32,417
Hear ye, hear ye,
40
00:01:32,504 --> 00:01:35,407
presenting
the Duchess of Sussex, Meghan...
41
00:01:35,494 --> 00:01:37,111
No, no, no, no, no.
That was for Pepper's party.
42
00:01:37,198 --> 00:01:39,741
We're not doing that anymore.
Go console your cousins.
43
00:01:39,828 --> 00:01:41,488
- Oh, hey.
- Oh, sweetie.
44
00:01:41,575 --> 00:01:43,922
- Let me get in there.
- Oh, hang on. Oh...
45
00:01:44,136 --> 00:01:45,782
- All right, get up.
- I had the same issue with this.
46
00:01:45,869 --> 00:01:46,890
- Just...
- Okay, there it is.
47
00:01:46,977 --> 00:01:48,353
- Ohh.
- Oh, sweetie.
48
00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:50,805
- Who needs a drink?
- I do. - I do.
49
00:01:50,892 --> 00:01:53,186
Okay,
how are we gonna handle this?
50
00:01:53,273 --> 00:01:54,397
You mean because the two most
51
00:01:54,484 --> 00:01:56,813
emotionally complicated people on earth
are facing the loss
52
00:01:56,900 --> 00:01:58,961
of the most complicated relationship
of their lives?
53
00:01:59,048 --> 00:02:01,375
So...
not an edible arrangement.
54
00:02:01,748 --> 00:02:03,039
We just have to be there
for them.
55
00:02:03,126 --> 00:02:04,523
Whatever they need. I...
56
00:02:04,831 --> 00:02:06,228
It just feels inappropriate
57
00:02:06,315 --> 00:02:07,722
- being dressed like this.
- Yeah.
58
00:02:07,809 --> 00:02:10,398
I should be in something darker
with a cap sleeve.
59
00:02:12,458 --> 00:02:15,025
This is so surreal.
I-I can't believe this.
60
00:02:15,112 --> 00:02:17,043
I-I just talked to her
right before she left.
61
00:02:17,130 --> 00:02:18,755
She was so excited about
her trip to Greenland
62
00:02:18,842 --> 00:02:19,923
- with her women's group.
- Mm.
63
00:02:20,010 --> 00:02:21,157
Still no word
on what happened?
64
00:02:21,244 --> 00:02:22,603
No. Jerry called.
65
00:02:22,690 --> 00:02:24,346
He said that
she had a heart problem
66
00:02:24,433 --> 00:02:26,679
she didn't want to talk about,
but we're still not sure if that's it.
67
00:02:26,766 --> 00:02:29,180
He did promise to reach out
as soon as he has some answers.
68
00:02:29,267 --> 00:02:31,438
Well, we're here to support you
in any way we can.
69
00:02:31,525 --> 00:02:34,098
Yeah. Anything you need,
anything at all, we're on it.
70
00:02:34,185 --> 00:02:36,172
- Soup?
- Tissues?
71
00:02:36,269 --> 00:02:38,079
Try this meditation exercise.
72
00:02:38,166 --> 00:02:41,467
Yeah, no, you guys
are being so sweet. I just...
73
00:02:41,554 --> 00:02:43,469
Yeah, but w-we cope with things
74
00:02:43,556 --> 00:02:45,949
a little less touchy-feely
and a little more...
75
00:02:46,036 --> 00:02:48,197
- Irish. Yes.
- Right. Right.
76
00:02:48,284 --> 00:02:50,657
You know, have some drinks,
tell some funny stories.
77
00:02:50,744 --> 00:02:52,228
Mm.
Do you remember the time
78
00:02:52,315 --> 00:02:54,172
Mom was so mad
because "Laverne and Shirley"
79
00:02:54,259 --> 00:02:55,773
moved to California?
80
00:02:56,436 --> 00:02:58,509
Or, no, remember
how she used to always
81
00:02:58,596 --> 00:03:01,376
- bring her own ice cubes to restaurants?
- Oh, God, yes!
82
00:03:01,463 --> 00:03:04,225
Remember when she got
thrown out of Scientology?
83
00:03:06,909 --> 00:03:08,528
Our mother is dead, Phil.
84
00:03:08,615 --> 00:03:09,862
I-I thought
we were...
85
00:03:09,949 --> 00:03:12,020
Maybe you should just
give us a little space?
86
00:03:12,107 --> 00:03:14,166
- Of course. Yes. Sure.
- Yeah. Yeah, sure. Sure.
87
00:03:14,253 --> 00:03:16,477
You know, I don't know how
we all feel about the afterlife,
88
00:03:16,564 --> 00:03:18,962
but
I myself would like to imagine Dede
89
00:03:19,049 --> 00:03:20,449
surrounded by loved ones,
90
00:03:20,536 --> 00:03:22,667
- hearing...
- Welcome to hell!
91
00:03:23,363 --> 00:03:25,214
- I'll disconnect that doorbell.
- Oh, God.
92
00:03:26,623 --> 00:03:27,658
Hey.
93
00:03:27,745 --> 00:03:29,865
We were out trick-or-treating
with the kids.
94
00:03:29,952 --> 00:03:31,255
- Dad.
- We left Joe with Manny,
95
00:03:31,342 --> 00:03:32,644
and we came
as soon as we heard.
96
00:03:32,731 --> 00:03:33,738
So sorry.
97
00:03:33,840 --> 00:03:35,746
- Come here, you two. Get in here.
- Oh, thanks, Dad.
98
00:03:35,833 --> 00:03:37,535
Yeah. I know.
You just have to... Yeah.
99
00:03:37,622 --> 00:03:41,036
Look, I know that your mother and I
had our differences,
100
00:03:41,123 --> 00:03:42,425
but she was a good woman.
101
00:03:42,512 --> 00:03:43,515
Yeah.
102
00:03:43,602 --> 00:03:45,098
She, uh...
103
00:03:45,989 --> 00:03:48,313
Yeah, she had great legs.
104
00:03:48,411 --> 00:03:49,947
Oh. Really? That's your tribute?
105
00:03:50,034 --> 00:03:51,892
Of course not.
She was very educated,
106
00:03:51,979 --> 00:03:53,282
as she often told me.
107
00:03:53,369 --> 00:03:56,186
She, um... uh...
108
00:03:56,273 --> 00:03:57,461
She...
109
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I can't watch this.
110
00:03:58,831 --> 00:04:01,002
It's like watching a fish panic
at the bottom of a boat.
111
00:04:01,089 --> 00:04:03,627
Uh, she... she gave you us,
your wonderful children.
112
00:04:03,714 --> 00:04:06,697
There you go. And for that
I will always be grateful.
113
00:04:06,784 --> 00:04:09,409
Yeah. We have so much
to be grateful
114
00:04:09,496 --> 00:04:12,120
- Mm-hmm.
- For. She was a wonderful mother.
115
00:04:12,207 --> 00:04:14,675
And I'm... I am so glad that
I was able to tell her that
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00:04:14,762 --> 00:04:16,973
during our last call.
And I didn't know it at the time,
117
00:04:17,060 --> 00:04:21,360
but in a lot of ways,
it was the perfect goodbye.
118
00:04:22,140 --> 00:04:23,452
Huh.
119
00:04:23,683 --> 00:04:25,061
Do we know what happened?
120
00:04:25,174 --> 00:04:27,436
Not yet, no.
But you know what?
121
00:04:27,523 --> 00:04:30,865
- I need to be around happy things...
- Yeah.
122
00:04:30,952 --> 00:04:33,217
Cute kids in costumes
trick-or-treating.
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00:04:33,304 --> 00:04:34,760
I'm gonna go hand out
some Halloween candy.
124
00:04:34,847 --> 00:04:36,645
- I'm good! Good, good!
- I'm... I'm coming with you.
125
00:04:36,732 --> 00:04:37,856
- I'm good.
- We're good.
126
00:04:37,943 --> 00:04:38,965
Nah.
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00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:40,920
Ah, you make plans,
128
00:04:41,007 --> 00:04:42,973
the universe steps in
and says "nope."
129
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,157
- Life is so unfair.
- Damn right.
130
00:04:45,244 --> 00:04:47,490
I just waited
in a line around the block
131
00:04:47,577 --> 00:04:49,398
for a hoagie
everybody's talking about.
132
00:04:49,485 --> 00:04:51,369
Then my ex-wife drops dead,
133
00:04:51,456 --> 00:04:53,285
and I'm too sad to eat it.
134
00:04:54,065 --> 00:04:55,571
I'll give it another hour.
135
00:04:55,658 --> 00:04:59,512
Oh, I'm so sorry
for your loss, Jay.
136
00:05:00,718 --> 00:05:03,104
I don't know why I thought
getting this out would help.
137
00:05:03,191 --> 00:05:04,607
What is that?
138
00:05:04,694 --> 00:05:07,387
Nana had these little
statues of herself made.
139
00:05:07,477 --> 00:05:09,387
They were her Christmas gift
to each of us.
140
00:05:09,474 --> 00:05:12,317
Now I feel better about
my stupid well in Africa.
141
00:05:12,404 --> 00:05:14,599
Hey. Hitting that candy pretty hard.
142
00:05:14,686 --> 00:05:16,551
You didn't even take
the wrapper off the last one.
143
00:05:16,638 --> 00:05:17,990
I'm sad. Shut up.
144
00:05:18,077 --> 00:05:20,036
I heard that
if you die on Halloween,
145
00:05:20,123 --> 00:05:21,949
you come back as a zombie.
146
00:05:22,036 --> 00:05:23,249
I can see that.
147
00:05:23,336 --> 00:05:24,586
Nana would be all,
148
00:05:24,673 --> 00:05:27,264
"Braaainnssss!
149
00:05:27,351 --> 00:05:28,653
Nope. Braaainnsss!"
150
00:05:28,740 --> 00:05:30,085
Uch!
151
00:05:31,929 --> 00:05:33,227
I just remember Nana...
152
00:05:33,314 --> 00:05:35,598
when we were little,
she would...
153
00:05:36,046 --> 00:05:36,876
She would...
154
00:05:36,963 --> 00:05:39,223
Oh, my God!
What is wrong with you two?!
155
00:05:39,310 --> 00:05:41,397
- What?
- Our grandmother just died.
156
00:05:41,484 --> 00:05:43,301
Luke's over here
making tasteless jokes,
157
00:05:43,388 --> 00:05:46,348
and you're stuffing your face.
Show some respect!
158
00:05:46,476 --> 00:05:49,855
I am so sorry, what happened
to your grandmother.
159
00:05:49,942 --> 00:05:51,739
She was a wonderful woman.
160
00:05:51,826 --> 00:05:53,358
Thank you, Gloria.
161
00:05:53,445 --> 00:05:55,927
Finally,
someone with a normal reaction.
162
00:05:56,014 --> 00:05:58,107
Didn't Nana try to strangle you
three times?
163
00:05:58,194 --> 00:05:59,998
Yeah, but one of those times,
164
00:06:00,085 --> 00:06:02,590
I was able to see again
my favorite abuela
165
00:06:02,677 --> 00:06:03,723
for one second.
166
00:06:03,810 --> 00:06:06,443
So I really should
thank Dede.
167
00:06:06,530 --> 00:06:10,092
Anyways, any issues that
your grandmother had with me,
168
00:06:10,179 --> 00:06:11,317
they're behind her.
169
00:06:11,404 --> 00:06:14,350
She's at peace.
She's living in a better place.
170
00:06:14,437 --> 00:06:15,795
What the hell is that?!
171
00:06:15,882 --> 00:06:18,231
Mm. Pretty lifelike, right?
Christmas gift from Nana.
172
00:06:18,318 --> 00:06:20,115
Ah, it's very cute.
173
00:06:20,202 --> 00:06:23,535
But... it's
amazing how her eyes are...
174
00:06:23,648 --> 00:06:26,123
are following me
wherever I go!
175
00:06:26,210 --> 00:06:27,866
I know that this is
going to sound crazy,
176
00:06:27,953 --> 00:06:30,802
but I have always worried
that when Dede died,
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00:06:30,889 --> 00:06:33,404
she was going to come back
and haunt me.
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00:06:33,491 --> 00:06:35,379
Maybe it's because
she whispered it to me
179
00:06:35,466 --> 00:06:36,738
at my wedding.
180
00:06:36,851 --> 00:06:38,934
Happy Halloween.
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00:06:41,702 --> 00:06:44,341
Cute.
You okay?
182
00:06:44,463 --> 00:06:45,598
Yeah, I was just thinking about
183
00:06:45,685 --> 00:06:47,556
this great Halloween with Mom.
184
00:06:47,643 --> 00:06:48,695
Oh.
185
00:06:49,007 --> 00:06:51,489
I wasn't really fitting in
in high school,
186
00:06:51,576 --> 00:06:54,169
so Mom
took me to go get ice cream
187
00:06:54,256 --> 00:06:56,316
at this place in-in West Hollywood.
188
00:06:56,542 --> 00:06:57,919
And the parade was going on.
189
00:06:58,006 --> 00:07:00,950
And before that,
I had never been to a gay event.
190
00:07:01,037 --> 00:07:02,436
Trick or treat!
191
00:07:02,835 --> 00:07:05,194
Here you go.
Happy Halloween.
192
00:07:05,428 --> 00:07:06,615
The thing is,
193
00:07:06,702 --> 00:07:08,654
she didn't force me
to talk about it.
194
00:07:08,741 --> 00:07:10,037
She just let it be. You know?
195
00:07:10,124 --> 00:07:11,926
And I-I think that
that was her way of saying
196
00:07:12,013 --> 00:07:13,848
that she was okay with me.
197
00:07:14,031 --> 00:07:15,434
I remember once Mom told me
198
00:07:15,521 --> 00:07:17,816
that I ate ice cream
like a prostitute.
199
00:07:19,037 --> 00:07:20,123
Ugghh, come on.
200
00:07:20,210 --> 00:07:21,247
Wh-Why haven't
we heard anything yet
201
00:07:21,334 --> 00:07:23,518
about what happened to her?
This is ridiculous!
202
00:07:23,605 --> 00:07:25,644
I know.
It's bad enough we lost our mom.
203
00:07:25,731 --> 00:07:28,418
Now we just have to sit here
expecting the worst.
204
00:07:28,579 --> 00:07:29,948
- Heyyy.
- Heyyy.
205
00:07:30,035 --> 00:07:31,274
Uh, heard some raised voices,
206
00:07:31,361 --> 00:07:32,397
- just making...
- Where have you guys been?
207
00:07:32,484 --> 00:07:33,590
Yeah, I don't know
if you've noticed, but we're kind of
208
00:07:33,677 --> 00:07:34,723
going
through something today.
209
00:07:34,810 --> 00:07:36,754
Well, you s-said
you wanted some space,
210
00:07:36,841 --> 00:07:38,715
- so we were giving you...
- So now you're gonna logic us to death?
211
00:07:38,802 --> 00:07:41,008
Yeah, yeah, 'cause that's
what we need right now.
212
00:07:42,905 --> 00:07:44,873
I am totally confused
213
00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:47,130
- about what we're supposed to do.
- No. I have an idea.
214
00:07:47,217 --> 00:07:49,692
Mitchell was just talking about
a great memory he had
215
00:07:49,779 --> 00:07:52,279
of Dede taking him for ice cream
in West Hollywood.
216
00:07:52,366 --> 00:07:55,106
We could go pick some up...
it would be a perfect tribute.
217
00:07:55,193 --> 00:07:56,686
That's great.
218
00:07:56,773 --> 00:07:58,920
Plus, I don't know why,
but there's...
219
00:07:59,007 --> 00:08:01,340
there's something about the way
Claire eats ice cream
220
00:08:01,427 --> 00:08:03,647
that I just...
enjoy.
221
00:08:03,734 --> 00:08:05,133
I just wish I could remember
the name of it.
222
00:08:05,220 --> 00:08:06,858
- I'm on it. Anderson Scooper?
- No.
223
00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:08,203
Priscilla Queen of the Desserts?
224
00:08:08,290 --> 00:08:10,053
- Mnh-mnh.
- Sherbert and Ernie?
225
00:08:10,140 --> 00:08:11,864
Mnh-mnh. It was something
very specific.
226
00:08:11,951 --> 00:08:13,889
West Hollywood Ice Cream Shop?
227
00:08:13,976 --> 00:08:16,176
- That's it. Let's go.
- This can't be happening.
228
00:08:16,263 --> 00:08:19,067
- Ohh.
- Aw, Jay, it's a hard day.
229
00:08:19,154 --> 00:08:20,131
Tell me.
230
00:08:20,218 --> 00:08:22,443
I put a sandwich in there
with my name on it
231
00:08:22,530 --> 00:08:24,129
10 minutes ago,
and now it's missing.
232
00:08:24,218 --> 00:08:26,692
- Who the hell took it?!
- Really? On a day like today,
233
00:08:26,779 --> 00:08:29,121
you can get this worked up
over a sandwich?
234
00:08:30,029 --> 00:08:32,473
- Come here.
- Yeah. Hey. It's okay.
235
00:08:32,560 --> 00:08:33,537
Ohh.
236
00:08:33,624 --> 00:08:34,848
You're smelling us.
237
00:08:34,935 --> 00:08:37,309
I smell guilt and pickles.
238
00:08:38,702 --> 00:08:39,717
Aah!
239
00:08:39,804 --> 00:08:41,146
Sorry, fireman habit.
240
00:08:41,233 --> 00:08:42,650
Your mom said you were up here.
241
00:08:42,737 --> 00:08:44,395
You're the best boyfriend.
242
00:08:45,155 --> 00:08:46,187
That's her, huh?
243
00:08:46,274 --> 00:08:47,265
Yep.
244
00:08:47,359 --> 00:08:48,708
People said she was difficult,
245
00:08:48,795 --> 00:08:50,443
but she was an amazing woman
246
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:52,497
who didn't conform to anyone's idea
247
00:08:52,584 --> 00:08:53,746
of who she should be.
248
00:08:53,882 --> 00:08:56,777
There are a lot of photos of her
being escorted out of places.
249
00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,452
Yeah.
250
00:08:59,342 --> 00:09:02,020
Well,
it must feel good to know that...
251
00:09:02,107 --> 00:09:05,428
I mean not good.
Everything must feel bad.
252
00:09:05,515 --> 00:09:07,965
I'm sorry. I'm bad
at this whole death thing.
253
00:09:08,052 --> 00:09:09,762
And I see a lot of it at work.
254
00:09:09,857 --> 00:09:13,017
I mean, nobody ever feeds
the station goldfish.
255
00:09:13,104 --> 00:09:14,887
It's not just hard for you.
256
00:09:15,199 --> 00:09:17,675
My brother can't stop cracking jokes,
257
00:09:17,762 --> 00:09:20,703
my sister's eating
like a bear about to hibernate,
258
00:09:20,790 --> 00:09:24,075
and meanwhile,
I'm just sitting here thinking,
259
00:09:24,162 --> 00:09:28,105
"Wow, you're here one second,
and then poof...
260
00:09:28,831 --> 00:09:30,207
you're not."
261
00:09:32,511 --> 00:09:34,652
I know how sad you must be.
262
00:09:36,206 --> 00:09:37,375
Take off your shirt.
263
00:09:37,462 --> 00:09:38,502
- What?
- Fine.
264
00:09:38,589 --> 00:09:40,651
- I'll run things.
- Wow.
265
00:09:44,974 --> 00:09:47,323
Okay, very funny!
266
00:09:47,410 --> 00:09:49,541
Who did this?!
267
00:09:54,224 --> 00:09:56,355
Santa Mar��a, Madre de Dios,
ruega por nosotros pecadores.
268
00:09:56,442 --> 00:09:58,119
Santa Mar��a, Madre de Dios,
ruega por nosotros pecadores,
269
00:09:58,206 --> 00:10:00,282
ahora y en la hora... Aah!
270
00:10:01,364 --> 00:10:03,393
Santa Mar�a, Madre de Dios,
ruega por nosotros pecadores,
271
00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,627
ahora y en la hora
de nuestra muerte. Amen.
272
00:10:08,161 --> 00:10:10,566
Hey, I haven't seen Alex
since she yelled at us.
273
00:10:10,653 --> 00:10:11,659
Is she okay up there?
274
00:10:11,746 --> 00:10:13,191
Now that I think about it,
275
00:10:13,278 --> 00:10:15,323
it did sound like
she was crying a minute ago.
276
00:10:15,410 --> 00:10:18,707
We should check on her.
This is classic Alex.
277
00:10:18,794 --> 00:10:21,316
She's criticizing how
we're processing Nana's death
278
00:10:21,403 --> 00:10:23,573
because she doesn't know
what to do with her own feelings.
279
00:10:23,660 --> 00:10:26,193
Meanwhile, she's taking it
harder than anybody.
280
00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:28,340
- Aah! Get out!
- Oh, that's not good.
281
00:10:31,016 --> 00:10:32,048
Ohh!
282
00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:34,031
Do you remember when, um,
283
00:10:34,118 --> 00:10:35,889
she wouldn't pay for
my voice lessons
284
00:10:35,976 --> 00:10:37,880
because she said
she wanted to save the money
285
00:10:37,967 --> 00:10:39,529
in case I ended up
with Dad's nose?
286
00:10:39,616 --> 00:10:42,270
You know, we... we could stick
to nice stories today.
287
00:10:42,359 --> 00:10:45,520
Mom was a real person.
She was flawed.
288
00:10:45,607 --> 00:10:48,350
She made me wear pants to prom.
289
00:10:48,437 --> 00:10:49,880
She said it would "slow down"
290
00:10:49,967 --> 00:10:51,882
whatever mistake
I was about to make.
291
00:10:51,969 --> 00:10:54,130
Well, I guess I never
brought out that side of her.
292
00:10:54,217 --> 00:10:57,176
Or maybe you just let her
get away with everything.
293
00:10:57,315 --> 00:10:58,685
- I...
- Trick or treat!
294
00:10:58,772 --> 00:11:00,279
Happy Halloween!
295
00:11:00,366 --> 00:11:01,841
What are you...
What are you supposed to be?
296
00:11:01,928 --> 00:11:04,013
- I was gonna go as a unicorn...
- Uh-huh.
297
00:11:04,100 --> 00:11:06,873
But then
I decided to be pajama girl.
298
00:11:07,092 --> 00:11:08,866
That was two weeks of
sewing well spent.
299
00:11:08,953 --> 00:11:10,286
Well, kids don't always appreciate
300
00:11:10,373 --> 00:11:11,431
what moms do for them.
301
00:11:11,518 --> 00:11:12,678
Moms can be controlling.
302
00:11:12,765 --> 00:11:13,794
Well, sometimes
moms don't want
303
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:15,544
their daughters
to embarrass themselves.
304
00:11:15,631 --> 00:11:16,663
Embarrass?
305
00:11:16,750 --> 00:11:19,069
Like throwing a surprise
moon goddess party
306
00:11:19,156 --> 00:11:20,896
for their daughter's first period?
307
00:11:20,983 --> 00:11:23,233
It was a celebration of
your womanhood!
308
00:11:23,320 --> 00:11:25,663
Every year I say I'm not coming
back to this house.
309
00:11:25,750 --> 00:11:27,021
Okay. Just today... Oh, God.
310
00:11:27,108 --> 00:11:29,677
Just... Just today,
could you not harp
311
00:11:29,764 --> 00:11:32,397
on how
awful Mom was to you?
312
00:11:32,484 --> 00:11:34,481
She would have done
anything for us!
313
00:11:34,568 --> 00:11:37,202
Mitchell, just because Mom is dead
314
00:11:37,289 --> 00:11:38,810
doesn't make her a saint!
315
00:11:38,897 --> 00:11:40,544
- Hey.
- What?
316
00:11:40,867 --> 00:11:42,715
You're scaring the kids.
317
00:11:48,070 --> 00:11:49,443
Ugh. What is wrong with me?
318
00:11:49,530 --> 00:11:50,918
Nothing is wrong with you.
319
00:11:51,005 --> 00:11:53,341
You're just a freak that
gets turned on by tragedies.
320
00:11:53,428 --> 00:11:54,460
Oh, my God.
321
00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,021
Is that why
I'm dating a firefighter?
322
00:11:56,108 --> 00:11:57,982
Oh, I hope I'm more to you
than that, babe.
323
00:11:58,069 --> 00:12:00,708
By the way, there was
a plane crash in Tustin.
324
00:12:02,807 --> 00:12:05,397
You know, there's a deep
psycho-spiritual connection
325
00:12:05,484 --> 00:12:06,569
between sex and death.
326
00:12:06,656 --> 00:12:08,146
Look at Freud.
Thanatos, Eros...
327
00:12:08,233 --> 00:12:09,817
locked in an eternal struggle.
328
00:12:10,070 --> 00:12:11,718
How do you know
any of those words?
329
00:12:11,805 --> 00:12:14,255
I don't know. Maybe I remembered
something from school somehow.
330
00:12:14,342 --> 00:12:16,225
They say everything
you've ever heard
331
00:12:16,312 --> 00:12:18,966
is locked in your brain somewhere.
Another fun fact...
332
00:12:19,053 --> 00:12:22,239
your brain burns 20%
of the calories you consume.
333
00:12:22,445 --> 00:12:23,677
My burrito!
334
00:12:23,764 --> 00:12:25,117
Another one?
335
00:12:25,641 --> 00:12:26,928
Oh, my God.
336
00:12:27,015 --> 00:12:28,607
I think your brain is finally working
337
00:12:28,694 --> 00:12:30,288
because,
for the first time ever,
338
00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:31,802
you're not starving yourself.
339
00:12:31,889 --> 00:12:34,044
That is a credible
hypothesis.
340
00:12:34,234 --> 00:12:36,542
Huh. Eating, are we?
341
00:12:36,937 --> 00:12:39,155
You didn't happen
to grab an Italian hero
342
00:12:39,242 --> 00:12:40,261
out of the fridge,
did you?
343
00:12:40,348 --> 00:12:41,840
Nope, but that sounds delicious.
344
00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:43,419
I'd go to town
on an Italian hero
345
00:12:43,506 --> 00:12:44,778
- right now.
- That's funny,
346
00:12:44,865 --> 00:12:47,654
- 'cause Alex just finished...
- I will rip your tongue out.
347
00:12:47,741 --> 00:12:49,615
Oh, my gosh.
348
00:12:49,702 --> 00:12:51,771
What was I thinking
coming to West Hollywood
349
00:12:51,858 --> 00:12:53,317
on Halloween night?
350
00:12:53,546 --> 00:12:55,319
Hey.
Give the horn a rest.
351
00:12:55,406 --> 00:12:57,106
The parade's going by.
You're gonna be sitting here a while.
352
00:12:57,193 --> 00:12:58,630
Sorry, Officer.
353
00:13:01,875 --> 00:13:04,147
I don't get down
to this part of town that often.
354
00:13:04,234 --> 00:13:05,450
That's...
That's not a real cop, right?
355
00:13:05,537 --> 00:13:07,395
Uh... mm, no.
356
00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:09,513
You know, I'm impressed
you're still wearing that dress.
357
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:11,349
Oh, well, I'm wearing
two pair of Spanx
358
00:13:11,436 --> 00:13:13,303
and was on a
diuretic for 48 hours.
359
00:13:13,390 --> 00:13:15,047
As we say where I'm from,
you don't teach
360
00:13:15,134 --> 00:13:16,149
your dog
to play the banjo
361
00:13:16,236 --> 00:13:18,430
and then
skip the talent show.
362
00:13:20,062 --> 00:13:21,352
Oh, man.
363
00:13:21,453 --> 00:13:23,426
This ice cream is gonna melt.
364
00:13:23,902 --> 00:13:26,352
Well,
grab a spoon.
365
00:13:27,812 --> 00:13:30,122
- Somebody should enjoy it.
- Yeah.
366
00:13:35,851 --> 00:13:38,465
You know, we've been so focused
on Mitchell and Claire,
367
00:13:38,875 --> 00:13:41,233
I haven't had a chance to really...
368
00:13:42,078 --> 00:13:43,460
Yeah. I know.
369
00:13:43,547 --> 00:13:45,575
First time I met her,
she threatened to murder me
370
00:13:45,662 --> 00:13:47,638
if I ever made her son
unhappy.
371
00:13:47,768 --> 00:13:50,010
Went into pretty graphic detail...
372
00:13:50,347 --> 00:13:52,887
described how she'd get rid of
my body and everything.
373
00:13:53,081 --> 00:13:54,032
I was like, "Wow,
374
00:13:54,119 --> 00:13:55,985
this woman will
never trust me."
375
00:13:56,072 --> 00:13:57,598
That's so her.
376
00:13:58,868 --> 00:14:00,505
Then one time,
she overheard me talking
377
00:14:00,592 --> 00:14:04,840
about drinking dandelion wine
with my... with my grandma.
378
00:14:04,945 --> 00:14:06,654
She went over to the kitchen cabinet
379
00:14:06,741 --> 00:14:07,858
and pulled out a bottle.
380
00:14:07,945 --> 00:14:10,497
Apparently, she had an aunt
that taught her how to make it.
381
00:14:10,601 --> 00:14:12,943
And we sat there
at the kitchen table
382
00:14:13,030 --> 00:14:15,475
drinking and swapping stories
383
00:14:15,562 --> 00:14:17,872
- about growing up in the boondocks.
- Mm.
384
00:14:18,016 --> 00:14:20,989
The wine made me go blind
for a bit, but...
385
00:14:21,601 --> 00:14:23,866
I'll never forget
her voice,
386
00:14:23,953 --> 00:14:24,990
slurring in the darkness,
387
00:14:25,077 --> 00:14:27,997
telling me
she understood why Mitchell loved me.
388
00:14:28,710 --> 00:14:30,638
I remember dropping
Haley off at school
389
00:14:30,725 --> 00:14:32,122
for the first time.
390
00:14:32,500 --> 00:14:35,143
Her staring at me
with those giant eyes,
391
00:14:35,601 --> 00:14:39,279
her lips quivering,
crying for me to stay.
392
00:14:39,366 --> 00:14:41,059
And I, uh...
393
00:14:41,953 --> 00:14:43,685
I told her everything
is gonna be all right,
394
00:14:43,772 --> 00:14:46,130
and then I stagger back
to my car and I start crying.
395
00:14:46,217 --> 00:14:47,404
- Oh, gosh.
- And you know
396
00:14:47,491 --> 00:14:49,317
who was there
waiting for me?
397
00:14:49,937 --> 00:14:51,046
Well, if it's not Dede,
398
00:14:51,133 --> 00:14:53,232
it's kind of a touching
but pointless story.
399
00:14:53,319 --> 00:14:54,873
It was Dede.
400
00:14:55,359 --> 00:14:58,122
She knew it was gonna be
a hard day for me.
401
00:14:58,507 --> 00:15:00,450
I can't believe she's gone.
402
00:15:01,234 --> 00:15:02,778
I'm gonna miss her.
403
00:15:03,531 --> 00:15:04,759
Me too.
404
00:15:05,265 --> 00:15:07,505
- To Dede.
- To Dede.
405
00:15:17,502 --> 00:15:19,336
Aah!
406
00:15:20,002 --> 00:15:23,937
Aah! Okay,
you want to talk? Let's talk.
407
00:15:24,059 --> 00:15:27,093
I know that you never liked me.
408
00:15:27,180 --> 00:15:29,420
And I was always nice.
409
00:15:29,556 --> 00:15:30,984
Okay, fine, one time,
410
00:15:31,071 --> 00:15:33,539
I did use your toothbrush on Stella.
411
00:15:33,626 --> 00:15:36,250
But mostly
I admired you for raising
412
00:15:36,337 --> 00:15:39,859
such wonderful children
and for helping make Jay
413
00:15:39,946 --> 00:15:43,235
the amazing man
that I fell in love with.
414
00:15:43,340 --> 00:15:45,470
I guess I never thanked you
415
00:15:45,557 --> 00:15:47,048
for all of that.
416
00:15:47,160 --> 00:15:50,263
So, if you can hear me now,
417
00:15:50,801 --> 00:15:52,590
thank you.
418
00:15:53,145 --> 00:15:56,158
And can you please tell
Rosa Garcia
419
00:15:56,245 --> 00:15:58,609
to stop haunting me, too?
420
00:15:59,316 --> 00:16:01,073
And Marta Blanco,
421
00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:04,603
Marisol Gutierrez,
and Cecila Matos?
422
00:16:04,690 --> 00:16:05,840
Gracias.
423
00:16:08,784 --> 00:16:10,112
Look, I'm sorry.
424
00:16:10,199 --> 00:16:12,854
I think I've been trying
to make Mom into the bad guy.
425
00:16:12,941 --> 00:16:14,287
It's not gonna make it
any easier.
426
00:16:14,374 --> 00:16:16,235
That's not it. I...
427
00:16:16,457 --> 00:16:17,900
I just feel so guilty.
428
00:16:17,987 --> 00:16:19,105
Why?
429
00:16:19,496 --> 00:16:21,886
Because
sometimes,
430
00:16:21,973 --> 00:16:23,542
I was as mean to Mom
431
00:16:23,629 --> 00:16:25,495
- as she was to me.
- Oh.
432
00:16:25,582 --> 00:16:26,878
She was just hard on you
433
00:16:26,965 --> 00:16:29,001
because
sh-she believed in you so much.
434
00:16:29,088 --> 00:16:31,102
Why do you always
have to defend her?
435
00:16:31,355 --> 00:16:33,946
Because I loved her!
I...
436
00:16:35,145 --> 00:16:36,635
I can't believe I'm saying that
in the past tense.
437
00:16:36,722 --> 00:16:40,565
I... I'm sorry that
I had a better relationship with her.
438
00:16:40,652 --> 00:16:42,736
And I'm... I'm sorry that
it bothered you, okay?
439
00:16:42,823 --> 00:16:44,619
You have a better relationship
with Dad,
440
00:16:44,706 --> 00:16:47,235
and I know
he loves me just as much.
441
00:16:47,402 --> 00:16:48,707
Mmm...
442
00:16:48,824 --> 00:16:51,042
Yeah, and when Dad dies,
443
00:16:51,129 --> 00:16:54,259
he's gonna leave, knowing,
how much I loved him.
444
00:16:54,346 --> 00:16:56,150
I'm not sure
Mom knew that.
445
00:16:56,237 --> 00:16:57,680
Of course she did.
446
00:16:57,832 --> 00:16:58,854
Really?
447
00:16:58,941 --> 00:17:00,908
Because unlike you,
the last time I talked to her,
448
00:17:00,995 --> 00:17:03,321
we got in a huge fight.
449
00:17:03,410 --> 00:17:04,409
Mm-hmm.
450
00:17:04,496 --> 00:17:06,438
You get to remember
451
00:17:06,525 --> 00:17:08,899
telling hery
ou loved her and laughing,
452
00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:11,671
and I get to remember
getting in some stupid argument
453
00:17:11,758 --> 00:17:13,407
about a Facebook post.
454
00:17:13,494 --> 00:17:15,704
The one where she said
putting eucalyptus oils
455
00:17:15,791 --> 00:17:17,804
on the soles of your feet
is a natural birth control?
456
00:17:17,891 --> 00:17:19,219
Yes. Yes.
457
00:17:19,306 --> 00:17:21,414
That's the one.
And you have
458
00:17:21,501 --> 00:17:23,053
a 12-year-old daughter
who reads those posts...
459
00:17:23,140 --> 00:17:24,686
you might want to tell her
that's not science.
460
00:17:24,773 --> 00:17:27,562
Okay, okay, remember
that last amazing conversation
461
00:17:27,649 --> 00:17:29,342
- I had with Mom? I'm sorry,
- Oh, for God's sakes.
462
00:17:29,429 --> 00:17:31,287
But there's no other
way to describe it, okay?
463
00:17:31,374 --> 00:17:33,194
She told me
about your fight, and she...
464
00:17:33,281 --> 00:17:34,764
she told me
how upset she was.
465
00:17:34,851 --> 00:17:37,802
She-She said she was gonna
call you to apologize.
466
00:17:38,251 --> 00:17:39,983
Oh, my God.
467
00:17:40,302 --> 00:17:43,092
She left me a voicemail
a couple days ago,
468
00:17:43,196 --> 00:17:44,709
but I was saving it
till the next time
469
00:17:44,796 --> 00:17:46,576
I had to yell
at somebody at work.
470
00:17:47,352 --> 00:17:48,563
Okay.
471
00:17:49,852 --> 00:17:51,953
Hey, honey. It's Mom.
472
00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:53,787
I just want to apologize.
473
00:17:53,874 --> 00:17:56,357
I should not have lost
my temper.
474
00:17:56,446 --> 00:17:59,304
Shaman Phoenix Feather's
family-planning advice
475
00:17:59,391 --> 00:18:00,758
may not be for everyone,
476
00:18:00,845 --> 00:18:02,491
and you just want to
keep your daughters safe.
477
00:18:02,578 --> 00:18:03,765
I get it.
478
00:18:03,852 --> 00:18:05,592
I have a daughter of my own,
479
00:18:05,679 --> 00:18:07,943
and I know how much
she means to me.
480
00:18:08,030 --> 00:18:11,594
Anyway, I'm sorry.
I love you, and I always will.
481
00:18:11,681 --> 00:18:13,091
I love you, too, Mom.
482
00:18:14,268 --> 00:18:18,209
Also, I saw your new photo
on social media.
483
00:18:18,681 --> 00:18:20,601
Are you part of some protest
484
00:18:20,688 --> 00:18:22,562
where you're not allowed
to wash your hair?
485
00:18:22,649 --> 00:18:24,022
Or are you just trying to be...
486
00:18:24,109 --> 00:18:26,834
I'm gonna listen to that
later.
487
00:18:26,921 --> 00:18:28,427
Huh.
488
00:18:28,945 --> 00:18:32,106
- Weird hearing her voice.
- Oh, Daddy.
489
00:18:35,149 --> 00:18:37,326
You already know this,
but I want to say it again.
490
00:18:37,413 --> 00:18:39,633
We both love you so much.
491
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:42,447
Yeah. And I know we've...
we've had our ups and downs,
492
00:18:42,534 --> 00:18:44,927
but I've loved being your son.
493
00:18:45,438 --> 00:18:47,756
- Hmm.
- Are you...
494
00:18:48,195 --> 00:18:50,088
buttering me up
'cause you ate my sandwich?
495
00:18:50,175 --> 00:18:52,281
- Oh!
- What is wrong with you?
496
00:18:52,368 --> 00:18:55,014
Seriously. What is this
obsession with a sandwich?
497
00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:56,935
I waited in line!
498
00:18:57,157 --> 00:18:59,310
I was thinking about it
for months!
499
00:18:59,696 --> 00:19:01,092
You know who would get this?
500
00:19:01,179 --> 00:19:04,359
Dede. That woman
appreciated a good sandwich.
501
00:19:04,446 --> 00:19:06,836
And she made the best ones,
you know,
502
00:19:06,923 --> 00:19:08,272
when we were first married.
503
00:19:08,359 --> 00:19:10,438
In that little house
in the valley.
504
00:19:10,696 --> 00:19:12,054
And we didn't have
any money,
505
00:19:12,141 --> 00:19:13,881
but she would go miles
out of her way
506
00:19:13,968 --> 00:19:15,928
to get the bread
with the crunchy crust
507
00:19:16,015 --> 00:19:17,297
from that French bakery.
508
00:19:17,384 --> 00:19:21,018
It was hard on the outside,
soft and warm on the inside,
509
00:19:21,023 --> 00:19:24,388
and she'd say,
"That's just like you, Jay."
510
00:19:26,313 --> 00:19:27,881
She was nice to me back then.
511
00:19:27,968 --> 00:19:29,165
Yeah.
512
00:19:30,044 --> 00:19:31,844
Uh. It's funny,
513
00:19:31,931 --> 00:19:35,931
I... happened to drive past there
a while ago.
514
00:19:36,329 --> 00:19:38,334
That bakery's not there anymore.
515
00:19:39,587 --> 00:19:42,373
And damn if I wasn't
depressed for a week.
516
00:19:43,438 --> 00:19:45,826
You know,
I didn't realize...
517
00:19:47,431 --> 00:19:49,611
how much it meant to me
518
00:19:50,001 --> 00:19:51,849
till it was gone,
you know?
519
00:19:52,048 --> 00:19:53,217
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
520
00:19:53,304 --> 00:19:55,193
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
521
00:19:56,173 --> 00:19:57,281
Look, yeah,
522
00:19:57,368 --> 00:19:59,935
Look at that
beautiful family moment.
523
00:20:00,147 --> 00:20:03,271
Yeah, look right at it.
524
00:20:05,079 --> 00:20:08,435
I asked myself,
"What would Nana want today?"
525
00:20:08,595 --> 00:20:11,131
She'd want me
to mess with Gloria.
526
00:20:11,712 --> 00:20:13,927
Also, I ate Grandpa's sandwich.
527
00:20:15,091 --> 00:20:17,544
Oh, God.
Jerry forwarded me an e-mail
528
00:20:17,631 --> 00:20:18,889
from Mom's women's group.
529
00:20:18,976 --> 00:20:20,858
I-I-I can't even read it.
530
00:20:20,945 --> 00:20:21,986
- You do it. I...
- Oh, okay.
531
00:20:22,073 --> 00:20:26,664
Um..."Our sincere condolences
on the loss of your loved one, Dede."
532
00:20:26,751 --> 00:20:28,225
Yeah.
What happened to Mom?
533
00:20:28,312 --> 00:20:29,586
- Oh, let's see.
- Yeah.
534
00:20:29,673 --> 00:20:32,209
"On the third night,
Dede wandered away from the group
535
00:20:32,296 --> 00:20:34,414
and encountered a pack
of starving
536
00:20:34,501 --> 00:20:36,295
- timberwolves."
- Oh my God, Mom. - Oh my God, Mom.
537
00:20:36,382 --> 00:20:37,656
"As you know,
Dede long believed
538
00:20:37,743 --> 00:20:39,038
she could comunicate
with animals,
539
00:20:39,125 --> 00:20:41,211
so using a mix of
howls and barks
540
00:20:41,298 --> 00:20:43,960
she convinced them
to seek food elsewhere."
541
00:20:44,047 --> 00:20:45,819
Huh,
guess that wasn't that. Let's see.
542
00:20:45,906 --> 00:20:49,264
Uhhh, "Later she ignored
that thin ice sign
543
00:20:49,351 --> 00:20:50,672
and plunged..."
544
00:20:50,759 --> 00:20:52,489
Hang on,
saved by one of the wolves.
545
00:20:52,649 --> 00:20:54,875
Uh... no, no,"She deeply
546
00:20:54,962 --> 00:20:59,173
offended a tribe of inuits by
interrupting a secret dagger...
547
00:20:59,260 --> 00:21:00,936
She briefly swallowed..."
548
00:21:01,023 --> 00:21:02,187
Uh... Here it is!
549
00:21:02,274 --> 00:21:05,936
"On the trip's final morning,
Dede was found in her room.
550
00:21:06,023 --> 00:21:09,168
She had apparently passed
peacefully in her sleep
551
00:21:09,255 --> 00:21:11,195
as a smile graced her face
552
00:21:11,282 --> 00:21:15,881
and her hands clutched 10 pages
of sugestions for the hotel staff."
553
00:21:15,968 --> 00:21:19,295
- That is so Mom.
- Easy.
554
00:21:20,305 --> 00:22:20,679
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