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1
00:00:50,285 --> 00:00:51,552
It's over.
2
00:00:53,621 --> 00:00:56,924
We know who you are.
3
00:00:56,957 --> 00:00:59,460
Your allies are all dead.
4
00:00:59,494 --> 00:01:01,195
You failed.
5
00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:04,265
I've already proven to you
that I can defy death.
6
00:01:04,299 --> 00:01:05,633
I'm just gonna bring her back.
7
00:01:05,666 --> 00:01:09,737
And when I do, my Ms. Mead will
stand by me as we watch you die.
8
00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:12,940
You can certainly go to Hell,
but you won't find her there.
9
00:01:12,973 --> 00:01:14,709
What have you done?
10
00:01:14,742 --> 00:01:17,612
Her soul is hidden
by a spell only I can break.
11
00:01:17,645 --> 00:01:20,281
You'll never see her again.
12
00:01:22,317 --> 00:01:23,818
You're alone.
13
00:01:23,851 --> 00:01:25,320
I'm never alone.
14
00:01:25,353 --> 00:01:28,323
I have my father.
15
00:01:28,356 --> 00:01:30,224
Where is he now?
16
00:01:30,257 --> 00:01:32,327
Why did he let this happen?
17
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:34,395
You don't have to follow
this path
18
00:01:34,429 --> 00:01:36,331
your father laid out for you.
19
00:01:36,364 --> 00:01:38,333
You can write your own destiny.
20
00:01:38,366 --> 00:01:41,336
You can still turn away.
21
00:01:41,369 --> 00:01:44,238
There's humanity in you.
22
00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:48,142
I see it.
23
00:01:48,175 --> 00:01:51,946
If you come with me,
24
00:01:51,979 --> 00:01:55,950
maybe we can find it.
25
00:01:58,218 --> 00:02:00,521
Together.
26
00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:15,770
Somehow,
27
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:19,540
some way, I am gonna
bring her back.
28
00:02:19,574 --> 00:02:23,411
And then I'm gonna kill
every last one of you.
29
00:04:17,858 --> 00:04:21,462
I'm not going any further.
30
00:04:21,496 --> 00:04:25,432
Father, tell me what to do,
and I'll do it.
31
00:04:29,504 --> 00:04:33,307
I'm not leaving this circle
until you talk to me.
32
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:35,843
They're gone. The warlocks,
33
00:04:35,876 --> 00:04:38,613
my Ms. Mead.
34
00:04:40,615 --> 00:04:44,752
Burned alive at the stake
by the witches.
35
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:48,455
Until nothing was left
36
00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:52,493
but ash and smoke.
37
00:04:57,197 --> 00:05:00,467
You tell me what to do...
38
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:03,470
or you let me die here.
39
00:05:29,163 --> 00:05:30,831
Would you like a grape Fanta?
40
00:05:32,032 --> 00:05:34,468
Would you like
a grape Fanta?
41
00:05:34,501 --> 00:05:38,405
- No, I'm on a mission.
- You're hungry.
42
00:05:38,438 --> 00:05:40,174
You need nourishment.
Take an apple.
43
00:05:40,207 --> 00:05:43,510
It's so juicy. It's so juicy.
44
00:05:44,779 --> 00:05:47,381
I have to talk to my father.
45
00:05:47,414 --> 00:05:49,516
You don't have... you don't have
to do anything. All are welcome.
46
00:05:49,550 --> 00:05:52,052
Come to the light.
47
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:55,590
Leave me alone.
48
00:05:55,623 --> 00:05:57,692
Why you do this to me?
49
00:05:57,725 --> 00:06:00,561
You left me to die. To burn.
50
00:06:00,595 --> 00:06:01,929
To burn.
51
00:06:01,962 --> 00:06:03,363
I'm afraid.
52
00:06:03,397 --> 00:06:04,531
I'm afraid.
53
00:06:04,565 --> 00:06:07,434
You're not real.
54
00:06:07,467 --> 00:06:09,403
None of this is re-real.
55
00:06:09,436 --> 00:06:11,438
Don't listen to her.
56
00:06:11,471 --> 00:06:13,574
You've done a great job.
57
00:06:13,608 --> 00:06:14,709
No.
58
00:06:14,742 --> 00:06:17,377
I failed.
59
00:06:17,411 --> 00:06:20,547
I'm lost.
I don't understand my purpose.
60
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:22,850
You're everything we expected.
61
00:06:22,883 --> 00:06:25,252
The Alpha and the Omega.
62
00:06:25,285 --> 00:06:28,222
Who is, who was,
63
00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:30,524
and who is to come.
64
00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:32,059
Liar!
65
00:06:32,827 --> 00:06:34,795
God loves you.
66
00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:49,443
Are you my father?
67
00:07:08,128 --> 00:07:11,598
What do you want from me?!
68
00:07:11,632 --> 00:07:14,101
What am I supposed to do?!
69
00:07:15,135 --> 00:07:18,138
Fuck am I supposed to do?
70
00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:03,150
You lost?
71
00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:27,975
People.
72
00:08:28,008 --> 00:08:29,643
Listen the fuck up.
73
00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:32,813
Just because we have a president
who's a total douchenozzle
74
00:08:32,847 --> 00:08:35,549
and global warming
is getting worse,
75
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:39,486
that doesn't mean you can
sit here on your lazy asses
76
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:42,156
and holler out
a few "Hail Satans."
77
00:08:42,189 --> 00:08:43,657
You think end-time's
just gonna show up
78
00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:45,392
like a herpes sore?
79
00:08:45,425 --> 00:08:49,396
So tired of preaching
to the goddamn choir.
80
00:08:49,429 --> 00:08:53,400
What aren't you getting?
You know the drill.
81
00:08:53,433 --> 00:08:57,071
The Antichrist is gonna ride in
on a wave of sin,
82
00:08:57,104 --> 00:09:00,540
and all we have here
is a weak piss dribble.
83
00:09:00,574 --> 00:09:04,111
Somebody, please help me out.
I'm about ready
84
00:09:04,144 --> 00:09:05,913
to gouge out my own eyes
so I don't have to look
85
00:09:05,946 --> 00:09:09,750
at this weak-ass congregation
anymore.
86
00:09:09,784 --> 00:09:12,519
I need to hear some sins.
87
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:16,190
I need to feel
we're making way for him.
88
00:09:16,223 --> 00:09:17,758
You.
89
00:09:19,226 --> 00:09:20,627
What are your sins?
90
00:09:20,660 --> 00:09:23,563
What did you do
to usher him in this week?
91
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:26,433
I stole a hundred dollars
from my register at work.
92
00:09:26,466 --> 00:09:29,103
Seriously?
A fucking rounding error?
93
00:09:29,136 --> 00:09:30,771
You think that's gonna open up
94
00:09:30,805 --> 00:09:32,773
the Gates of Hell?
95
00:09:32,807 --> 00:09:36,043
- I slept with my wife's sister.
- I've seen bad face-lifts
96
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:38,012
that are more evil than you.
97
00:09:39,914 --> 00:09:41,882
You want to know
what I did this week?
98
00:09:41,916 --> 00:09:44,151
You want to be inspired?
99
00:09:44,184 --> 00:09:48,588
You want to know how
I'm helping bring end-times?
100
00:09:48,622 --> 00:09:50,324
I robbed a nursing home
101
00:09:50,357 --> 00:09:53,928
and I gave all the money
to the NRA.
102
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:57,231
Next week
I need to feel some evil.
103
00:09:57,264 --> 00:10:01,735
I need to be repulsed.
104
00:10:01,768 --> 00:10:05,439
I need to feel sick
to my stomach.
105
00:10:05,472 --> 00:10:08,508
I want to be inspired!
106
00:10:09,844 --> 00:10:12,679
Whatever. Okay.
107
00:10:12,712 --> 00:10:15,615
Let's speak in tongues
for a hot sec and...
108
00:10:15,649 --> 00:10:18,652
show some respect.
109
00:10:23,390 --> 00:10:26,393
I don't have any money
right now.
110
00:10:27,694 --> 00:10:30,097
Or any food
from the looks of it.
111
00:10:34,668 --> 00:10:36,937
How long has it been
since you ate, kid?
112
00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:41,508
What's it to you?
113
00:10:41,541 --> 00:10:42,877
Just...
114
00:10:42,910 --> 00:10:46,780
trying to help out
a fellow believer.
115
00:10:46,813 --> 00:10:49,049
You know...
116
00:10:49,083 --> 00:10:52,186
after the service...
117
00:10:52,219 --> 00:10:54,855
I could fix you something.
118
00:10:54,889 --> 00:10:58,225
My place is only
a couple of blocks from here.
119
00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:01,628
That's actually
really nice of you.
120
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,763
What can I say?
121
00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:07,935
Nobody's perfect.
122
00:11:22,582 --> 00:11:24,885
What's your name, kid?
123
00:11:28,923 --> 00:11:30,757
Michael.
124
00:11:30,790 --> 00:11:32,826
You must have been starving.
125
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:35,862
I seen a lot of young people
like you come to our church
126
00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:39,833
off the five stars on Yelp and
the free doughnut at check-in.
127
00:11:39,866 --> 00:11:42,536
They all had
the same look you do.
128
00:11:42,569 --> 00:11:45,239
Scared. Searching.
129
00:11:45,272 --> 00:11:48,475
Questioning what the hell
this all means.
130
00:11:52,312 --> 00:11:53,880
So...
131
00:11:53,914 --> 00:11:55,715
what's your story?
132
00:11:55,749 --> 00:11:58,452
How did you end up all alone
133
00:11:58,485 --> 00:12:01,922
and at our beloved
Satan's doorstep?
134
00:12:01,956 --> 00:12:04,158
My father abandoned me.
135
00:12:05,993 --> 00:12:08,528
And my mother tried to kill me.
136
00:12:08,562 --> 00:12:10,064
Humanity...
137
00:12:10,097 --> 00:12:13,934
is shit.
138
00:12:13,968 --> 00:12:17,904
This world is
a twisted black hole
139
00:12:17,938 --> 00:12:19,606
of sin and chaos,
140
00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:24,278
and that's why Satanism is
the way of the future.
141
00:12:24,311 --> 00:12:27,982
We are the fastest-growing
religion in the world,
142
00:12:28,015 --> 00:12:30,884
so we need people like you...
143
00:12:30,917 --> 00:12:33,753
bright, eager,
the next generation...
144
00:12:33,787 --> 00:12:35,922
to help spread the word
of Lucifer.
145
00:12:35,956 --> 00:12:38,492
'Cause here's
the beautiful secret, babe.
146
00:12:38,525 --> 00:12:40,961
Once you embrace
that at our core
147
00:12:40,995 --> 00:12:44,431
we are degenerate,
rotten beings,
148
00:12:44,464 --> 00:12:46,800
every last one of us...
149
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:50,004
you'll be free.
150
00:12:50,037 --> 00:12:52,406
Satanism...
151
00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:54,908
is about giving in
to your urges,
152
00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:58,979
embracing sin, your true nature.
153
00:12:59,013 --> 00:13:01,748
I sold my soul to the Devil,
154
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:05,852
and he gave me
everything I ever wanted.
155
00:13:05,885 --> 00:13:07,921
You sold your soul?
156
00:13:07,954 --> 00:13:10,624
Did you sign a contract
in blood?
157
00:13:10,657 --> 00:13:14,128
I made a deal in a Black Mass,
as one does.
158
00:13:14,161 --> 00:13:15,996
Through prayer.
159
00:13:16,030 --> 00:13:18,198
And by prayer...
I mean...
160
00:13:18,232 --> 00:13:20,767
killing people... it works.
161
00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:24,004
You're standing in the proof.
162
00:13:24,038 --> 00:13:26,806
I offered up my soul, and...
163
00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:29,343
he gave me all this.
164
00:13:29,376 --> 00:13:32,012
Riches beyond compare.
165
00:13:32,046 --> 00:13:35,282
I've got a... a La-Z-Boy,
166
00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:39,819
a-a cable package
with all the premium channels.
167
00:13:39,853 --> 00:13:42,122
I shoot up heroin
168
00:13:42,156 --> 00:13:44,858
as much as I want,
and I never get the sweats.
169
00:13:44,891 --> 00:13:47,994
And every Wednesday night
Brad Pitt comes over
170
00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:50,197
and fucks me
till the sun comes up.
171
00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:55,269
On Friday nights
I get Ryan Reynolds.
172
00:13:57,071 --> 00:14:00,074
So that's all it is, then.
173
00:14:04,344 --> 00:14:07,581
Satan is carnal pleasure.
174
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:11,985
Hell no.
175
00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:14,054
We've got a greater purpose.
176
00:14:14,088 --> 00:14:17,991
We are moving towards
the beginning of the end.
177
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,993
Our savior is coming.
178
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:22,862
The spawn of Satan will...
179
00:14:22,896 --> 00:14:26,032
lead us off the cliff
and into the end-times.
180
00:14:26,066 --> 00:14:29,703
We just have to make things
terrible enough for him to rise.
181
00:14:29,736 --> 00:14:32,072
We are the fetid,
182
00:14:32,106 --> 00:14:34,074
rancid, contaminated soil
183
00:14:34,108 --> 00:14:37,411
from which he will bloom.
184
00:14:37,444 --> 00:14:39,846
And then plunge us
185
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:42,116
in eternal darkness
186
00:14:42,149 --> 00:14:46,553
so that we can walk with Satan
in eternal hellfire.
187
00:14:48,155 --> 00:14:51,024
I hate to break it to you...
188
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:54,060
but you're waiting in vain.
189
00:14:57,131 --> 00:14:59,933
What are you talking about?
190
00:15:03,770 --> 00:15:06,540
I'm the one you're waiting for.
191
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,942
How dare you blaspheme!
192
00:15:08,975 --> 00:15:13,113
Well, before you kill me,
dear believer...
193
00:15:13,147 --> 00:15:14,481
see me.
194
00:15:23,157 --> 00:15:25,925
Hail Satan!
195
00:15:25,959 --> 00:15:28,762
Our savior has risen!
196
00:15:33,099 --> 00:15:35,169
♪ Semper crescis ♪
197
00:15:35,202 --> 00:15:37,337
♪ Aut decrescis ♪
198
00:15:37,371 --> 00:15:38,738
♪ Vita ♪
199
00:15:38,772 --> 00:15:42,909
♪ Detestabilis ♪
200
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:44,978
♪ Nunc obdurat ♪
201
00:15:45,011 --> 00:15:47,247
♪ Et tunc curat ♪
202
00:15:47,281 --> 00:15:49,416
♪ Ludo mentis ♪
203
00:15:49,449 --> 00:15:52,352
♪ Aciem ♪
204
00:15:52,386 --> 00:15:54,421
♪ Sors salutis ♪
205
00:15:54,454 --> 00:15:56,756
♪ Et virtutis ♪
206
00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:58,258
♪ Michi nunc ♪
207
00:15:58,292 --> 00:16:01,495
♪ Contraria ♪
208
00:16:01,528 --> 00:16:03,963
♪ Quod per sortem ♪
209
00:16:03,997 --> 00:16:06,266
♪ Sternit fortem ♪
210
00:16:06,300 --> 00:16:09,102
♪ Mecum omnes ♪
211
00:16:09,135 --> 00:16:12,839
♪ Plangite! ♪
212
00:16:14,408 --> 00:16:16,943
Ladies and gentlemen,
213
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:20,180
the volunteer All-Sinners choir!
214
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:27,954
They really know how to raise
some hell, don't they, kids?
215
00:16:27,987 --> 00:16:30,790
Hail Satan!
216
00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:34,361
And, you ask, why does it rain
every time they sing?
217
00:16:34,394 --> 00:16:37,831
Because God is pissing
in his pants.
218
00:16:37,864 --> 00:16:40,133
Hail Satan!
219
00:16:40,166 --> 00:16:43,570
Well, now that we're
in the mood,
220
00:16:43,603 --> 00:16:48,208
are you ready for an
old-fashioned human sacrifice?
221
00:16:48,242 --> 00:16:51,245
- Yeah!
- Black Mass...
222
00:16:51,278 --> 00:16:53,046
you are everything!
223
00:17:02,256 --> 00:17:04,858
This is Leticia.
224
00:17:04,891 --> 00:17:06,860
She is a social worker.
225
00:17:06,893 --> 00:17:09,563
And she's dedicated
her entire life
226
00:17:09,596 --> 00:17:12,699
to easing the suffering
of those less fortunate.
227
00:17:12,732 --> 00:17:14,701
Bitch, please.
228
00:17:16,236 --> 00:17:18,104
Theodore...
229
00:17:18,137 --> 00:17:22,208
is a lifelong member
of Doctors Without Borders.
230
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:25,379
Isn't that just too precious?
231
00:17:27,247 --> 00:17:30,016
Minus the two of them,
I think the world will be
232
00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:32,051
a little bit shittier.
233
00:17:32,085 --> 00:17:35,255
So why waste any more time?
234
00:17:37,557 --> 00:17:40,360
The honor
of today's killing goes
235
00:17:40,394 --> 00:17:42,228
to a new member... Phil.
236
00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:45,198
Go, Phil!
237
00:17:45,231 --> 00:17:49,403
Phil, tell us a little something
about yourself.
238
00:17:49,436 --> 00:17:53,307
Well, I was
the chief accountant at Gawker
239
00:17:53,340 --> 00:17:54,908
before, you know...
240
00:17:54,941 --> 00:17:58,244
that whole thing.
241
00:17:58,278 --> 00:18:00,213
Then my girlfriend left me,
242
00:18:00,246 --> 00:18:03,950
and my life turned to shit...
243
00:18:03,983 --> 00:18:06,553
until I saw the darkness.
244
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:10,089
Are you ready
to pledge your soul to Satan?
245
00:18:10,123 --> 00:18:12,459
Am I ever.
246
00:18:13,493 --> 00:18:15,128
They're all yours.
247
00:18:15,161 --> 00:18:17,331
Hail Satan!
248
00:18:17,364 --> 00:18:19,333
Hail Satan!
249
00:18:19,366 --> 00:18:20,934
Hail Satan.
250
00:18:20,967 --> 00:18:23,269
Don't let me down, Phil.
251
00:18:25,171 --> 00:18:26,673
Wait!
252
00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:30,243
This honor belongs
to someone else.
253
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:33,146
Someone else?
254
00:18:33,179 --> 00:18:34,848
His name is Michael.
255
00:18:34,881 --> 00:18:36,516
He's...
256
00:18:36,550 --> 00:18:38,318
new here.
257
00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:42,989
Well, even if he's willing
to sell his soul,
258
00:18:43,022 --> 00:18:44,924
why should he go before...?
259
00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:49,363
Michael doesn't need
to sell his soul.
260
00:18:53,533 --> 00:18:55,935
The end-times
261
00:18:55,969 --> 00:18:59,172
are upon us.
262
00:19:03,843 --> 00:19:05,144
Behold.
263
00:19:07,347 --> 00:19:09,349
The mark of the beast.
264
00:19:11,351 --> 00:19:15,021
Is it possible that...
265
00:19:15,054 --> 00:19:16,356
you're the one?
266
00:19:16,390 --> 00:19:17,357
I am.
267
00:19:17,391 --> 00:19:20,560
Hail Satan.
268
00:19:30,269 --> 00:19:35,509
♪ O Fortuna ♪
269
00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:41,381
♪ Velut luna ♪
270
00:19:42,582 --> 00:19:44,551
♪ Statu ♪
271
00:19:44,584 --> 00:19:50,223
♪ Variabilis. ♪
272
00:19:59,566 --> 00:20:03,470
- Hail Satan!
- Hail Satan!
273
00:20:17,316 --> 00:20:20,286
Is it too spicy?
274
00:20:20,319 --> 00:20:23,189
No. It's good.
275
00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:24,758
Thank the Dark Lord.
276
00:20:24,791 --> 00:20:26,626
It's my mother's recipe.
277
00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:28,361
Now try the macaroni salad.
278
00:20:28,394 --> 00:20:30,396
No, the turkey meatballs.
279
00:20:30,430 --> 00:20:32,198
May I touch your hair?
280
00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:34,367
Let the kid eat.
281
00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,470
O-Or is something wrong?
282
00:20:36,503 --> 00:20:39,473
What can we get you?
What can we do?
283
00:20:39,506 --> 00:20:43,209
I just think everyone should do
what you normally do.
284
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:45,411
Have fun.
285
00:20:45,445 --> 00:20:50,049
Enjoy your Wednesday
potluck dinner like always.
286
00:20:50,083 --> 00:20:51,485
You heard him.
287
00:20:51,518 --> 00:20:55,489
Our guest of honor eats
at his own pace.
288
00:21:00,494 --> 00:21:04,731
Though I can personally vouch
for the spinach lasagna.
289
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:08,502
It would be the honor of my life
to watch you eat it.
290
00:21:08,535 --> 00:21:12,506
So, what happens next?
291
00:21:14,541 --> 00:21:17,511
Probably your lasagna.
292
00:21:17,544 --> 00:21:19,078
No,
293
00:21:19,112 --> 00:21:22,315
I meant on
the global annihilation front.
294
00:21:22,348 --> 00:21:23,416
What do we do first?
295
00:21:23,449 --> 00:21:25,685
When do we do it?
296
00:21:25,719 --> 00:21:28,087
I'm not sure.
297
00:21:28,121 --> 00:21:30,857
What do you mean
you're not sure?
298
00:21:30,890 --> 00:21:33,459
I don't know what to do,
299
00:21:33,493 --> 00:21:35,529
where to begin.
300
00:21:35,562 --> 00:21:36,930
But you're the Antichrist.
301
00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:39,633
Which people
won't let me forget.
302
00:21:39,666 --> 00:21:41,701
Everyone keeps saying
that I'm special,
303
00:21:41,735 --> 00:21:44,538
that I'm the only one who
can bring about the end-times,
304
00:21:44,571 --> 00:21:47,541
but nobody gave me
a fucking instruction manual.
305
00:21:47,574 --> 00:21:49,475
And the one person
who always helped me,
306
00:21:49,509 --> 00:21:51,878
who I could always turn to
for advice,
307
00:21:51,911 --> 00:21:54,413
she's gone now.
308
00:22:01,420 --> 00:22:03,456
I have no one.
309
00:22:05,692 --> 00:22:09,395
I-I think there's some people
you need to see.
310
00:22:11,998 --> 00:22:13,466
Who?
311
00:22:13,499 --> 00:22:16,069
Just trust me.
312
00:22:16,102 --> 00:22:20,740
We are on the precipice
of oblivion, Michael.
313
00:22:20,774 --> 00:22:25,712
Now is not the time
to bury yourself in doubt.
314
00:22:25,745 --> 00:22:28,548
This person who helped you,
315
00:22:28,582 --> 00:22:31,384
what was her name?
316
00:22:31,417 --> 00:22:34,520
Ms. Miriam Mead.
317
00:22:34,554 --> 00:22:39,325
We have access
to private search engines
318
00:22:39,358 --> 00:22:42,161
that can find anyone.
319
00:22:42,195 --> 00:22:45,699
And... there she is.
320
00:22:45,732 --> 00:22:47,500
We'll just go and pick her up.
321
00:22:47,533 --> 00:22:50,503
It's not possible.
322
00:22:50,536 --> 00:22:53,406
I'm not powerful enough
to bring her back.
323
00:22:53,439 --> 00:22:56,710
Not anymore, at least.
324
00:22:57,711 --> 00:22:58,778
She's dead.
325
00:22:59,813 --> 00:23:01,581
Dead?
326
00:23:04,050 --> 00:23:07,721
That's something
we can work around.
327
00:23:12,592 --> 00:23:17,631
You are the son of Satan.
328
00:23:17,664 --> 00:23:20,566
There is no one
329
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:23,569
or no thing
330
00:23:23,603 --> 00:23:27,206
you cannot have.
331
00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:29,408
I don't know why
332
00:23:29,442 --> 00:23:31,778
you won't just tell me
exactly where we're going.
333
00:23:31,811 --> 00:23:34,714
I'm sorry.
I'm already a little freaked out
334
00:23:34,748 --> 00:23:38,417
I've said too much.
And you being who you are...
335
00:23:38,451 --> 00:23:40,586
It's okay.
336
00:23:40,620 --> 00:23:42,622
You don't have to be nervous
around me.
337
00:23:42,656 --> 00:23:44,724
I'm the same guy I was
when you met me.
338
00:23:44,758 --> 00:23:48,327
That is so not true.
339
00:23:49,328 --> 00:23:51,297
Just tell me.
340
00:23:51,330 --> 00:23:53,232
Okay.
341
00:23:53,266 --> 00:23:56,435
We are, like,
this secret network.
342
00:23:56,469 --> 00:23:59,572
We all know each other.
343
00:23:59,605 --> 00:24:02,809
A secret network of people
who sold their souls.
344
00:24:02,842 --> 00:24:04,310
Yeah.
345
00:24:04,343 --> 00:24:06,245
And...
346
00:24:06,279 --> 00:24:09,248
if you think about this network
like it's a hotel,
347
00:24:09,282 --> 00:24:13,186
then I am taking you
to the penthouse.
348
00:24:13,219 --> 00:24:15,689
No one is gonna pass up a chance
349
00:24:15,722 --> 00:24:19,693
to meet the true son
of the most foul.
350
00:24:19,726 --> 00:24:23,629
If there is anyone who can help
get you back on track, they can.
351
00:24:47,887 --> 00:24:50,123
You're not coming with me?
352
00:24:50,156 --> 00:24:52,726
They're only interested in you.
353
00:24:52,759 --> 00:24:56,796
Just... go up the path
to the entrance.
354
00:24:56,830 --> 00:24:59,733
I really think
you're gonna be impressed.
355
00:24:59,766 --> 00:25:02,736
At least I hope so.
356
00:25:02,769 --> 00:25:05,839
Why are you so good to me?
357
00:25:05,872 --> 00:25:09,242
I've waited for you
my whole life.
358
00:25:09,275 --> 00:25:11,644
We all have.
359
00:25:11,677 --> 00:25:13,146
Could I ask you a favor?
360
00:25:13,179 --> 00:25:14,547
Anything.
361
00:25:14,580 --> 00:25:18,684
When you finally talk
to your father,
362
00:25:18,718 --> 00:25:22,355
could you maybe put in
a good word for me?
363
00:25:22,388 --> 00:25:24,257
When I get to Hell,
364
00:25:24,290 --> 00:25:27,060
I want to be
in the lowest circle.
365
00:25:27,093 --> 00:25:28,661
Circle?
366
00:25:28,694 --> 00:25:30,063
However it's structured,
367
00:25:30,096 --> 00:25:32,766
I want to be in the worst part.
368
00:25:32,799 --> 00:25:34,567
Or the best part.
369
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:38,371
I want to burn
in blistering fire
370
00:25:38,404 --> 00:25:41,707
for all eternity in service.
371
00:25:42,742 --> 00:25:44,744
I'll see what I can do.
372
00:25:44,778 --> 00:25:47,213
- Okay?
- Okay.
373
00:25:49,749 --> 00:25:51,951
Hail Satan!
374
00:26:12,738 --> 00:26:14,707
Tell me
that wasn't the last of it.
375
00:26:14,740 --> 00:26:16,976
I ordered more, bruh.
How you coming?
376
00:26:17,010 --> 00:26:18,812
Almost done.
377
00:26:19,846 --> 00:26:21,614
Okay.
378
00:26:21,647 --> 00:26:23,649
Let's try it.
379
00:26:33,860 --> 00:26:36,662
Holy shit, that's way better.
What'd you do?
380
00:26:36,695 --> 00:26:38,664
I tweaked the feedback
sensors on the finger joints
381
00:26:38,697 --> 00:26:40,233
and gave the lateral servos
a flush.
382
00:26:40,266 --> 00:26:42,001
The next auto-update,
all our Tiffany and Bambi users
383
00:26:42,035 --> 00:26:44,170
are going to be very happy.
384
00:26:44,203 --> 00:26:46,806
Fuck yeah, bro. I'm pitching
a tent just looking at that.
385
00:26:48,674 --> 00:26:50,776
Shit!
386
00:26:50,810 --> 00:26:52,345
Well,
387
00:26:52,378 --> 00:26:55,181
5,000 of our clients
just got their dicks ripped off.
388
00:26:55,214 --> 00:26:57,616
It's okay, it's okay.
389
00:26:57,650 --> 00:26:59,285
- I know what the problem is.
- Yeah, I know
390
00:26:59,318 --> 00:27:01,287
what my problem is...
I need another fix.
391
00:27:01,320 --> 00:27:03,823
Hey, babe, we're spiraling here.
392
00:27:03,857 --> 00:27:05,291
Do you have an ETA?
393
00:27:05,324 --> 00:27:06,926
Babe? Babe?
394
00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:08,694
Babe?
395
00:27:08,727 --> 00:27:11,030
It's just arriving now.
396
00:27:11,064 --> 00:27:13,867
Terribly sorry for the delay.
397
00:27:13,900 --> 00:27:15,835
I'm so sorry, Ms. Venable.
398
00:27:15,869 --> 00:27:18,304
There was a bad accident
on the 101.
399
00:27:18,337 --> 00:27:21,107
Not as bad as the accident
that brought you into the world,
400
00:27:21,140 --> 00:27:22,441
I'm sure.
401
00:27:22,475 --> 00:27:24,510
I got back as fast as I could.
402
00:27:24,543 --> 00:27:26,712
You don't have
to insult me again.
403
00:27:26,745 --> 00:27:29,115
I certainly don't have to.
404
00:27:29,148 --> 00:27:34,888
But why deny myself one
of life's simple pleasures?
405
00:27:34,921 --> 00:27:37,656
Now set that down
406
00:27:37,690 --> 00:27:42,328
and summon all your brain cells
to clear your desk.
407
00:27:45,031 --> 00:27:47,901
Y-You can't treat people
like this.
408
00:27:47,934 --> 00:27:49,903
I'm gonna report you to HR.
409
00:27:49,936 --> 00:27:54,307
I am HR, bitch.
410
00:27:54,340 --> 00:27:57,843
And everything else that matters
around here, too.
411
00:27:57,877 --> 00:28:03,182
Now, do me a favor and get
the fuck out of my sight.
412
00:28:21,100 --> 00:28:22,868
Dude, this easy listening music
413
00:28:22,902 --> 00:28:24,537
you're always playing
is not helping.
414
00:28:24,570 --> 00:28:26,272
How many times do I have
to tell you,
415
00:28:26,305 --> 00:28:28,341
don't knock the playlist,
the playlist is everything.
416
00:28:28,374 --> 00:28:31,911
Light rock is soothing for me;
it is calming, it is focusing.
417
00:28:31,945 --> 00:28:34,948
Other than cocaine,
it is my cocaine.
418
00:28:34,981 --> 00:28:37,116
Yes.
419
00:28:37,150 --> 00:28:39,953
Oh, babe, you're a lifesaver.
420
00:28:39,986 --> 00:28:41,587
Hey, I was working.
421
00:28:41,620 --> 00:28:44,757
Shit. I'm sorry.
422
00:28:44,790 --> 00:28:46,592
I forgot.
423
00:28:46,625 --> 00:28:50,863
♪ Oh, can't you see
the morning after? ♪
424
00:28:57,937 --> 00:28:59,705
Easy.
425
00:28:59,738 --> 00:29:00,906
How do you guys not OD?
426
00:29:00,940 --> 00:29:03,742
Hell if I know.
427
00:29:03,776 --> 00:29:06,412
- Devil of a mystery.
- The package
428
00:29:06,445 --> 00:29:09,315
of dog feces is on its way
to Mr. Zuckerberg's estate...
429
00:29:09,348 --> 00:29:10,984
fourth-class mail, of course.
430
00:29:11,017 --> 00:29:13,819
Rihanna's people called...
she'll be available all weekend,
431
00:29:13,852 --> 00:29:15,821
and I've already purchased
the island.
432
00:29:15,854 --> 00:29:18,557
- Nice.
- Yes. Ms. Venable.
433
00:29:18,591 --> 00:29:20,626
What would our lives be
without you?
434
00:29:20,659 --> 00:29:22,761
I just can't imagine.
435
00:29:22,795 --> 00:29:24,897
A lot less purple.
436
00:29:24,930 --> 00:29:26,932
Yeah, purple's Ms. Venable's
thing.
437
00:29:26,966 --> 00:29:29,135
Just as self-abasement is yours.
438
00:29:35,108 --> 00:29:36,109
Zinger. Yeah.
439
00:29:36,142 --> 00:29:38,077
Lastly, the front desk
440
00:29:38,111 --> 00:29:40,679
says there's a gentleman here
to see you.
441
00:29:42,615 --> 00:29:45,751
Apparently he claims
to have arranged this meeting
442
00:29:45,784 --> 00:29:47,753
- with you himself.
- Yeah.
443
00:29:47,786 --> 00:29:51,024
If you could let him in
the private elevator, please?
444
00:29:54,060 --> 00:29:55,828
Certainly.
445
00:30:03,402 --> 00:30:06,305
Don't ever call me "babe."
446
00:30:10,976 --> 00:30:15,814
Sometimes, I swear,
she hates our guts.
447
00:30:40,706 --> 00:30:42,241
Dude.
448
00:30:42,275 --> 00:30:44,710
What's up?
449
00:30:44,743 --> 00:30:46,979
Come on in.
Dying to meet you.
450
00:30:47,012 --> 00:30:49,048
Yeah, Madelyn's really
been talking you up.
451
00:30:49,082 --> 00:30:52,851
That lady is whacked, right?
452
00:30:52,885 --> 00:30:56,255
But she seems totally convinced
that you're The One.
453
00:30:56,289 --> 00:30:58,591
No offense, but I thought you'd
be a little bit more jacked.
454
00:30:58,624 --> 00:31:00,426
Like, I was picturing you
totally ripped, like The...
455
00:31:00,459 --> 00:31:02,928
like The Rock when he was,
you know, The Rock.
456
00:31:02,961 --> 00:31:04,597
Yeah, that's, like,
stereotypical, dude.
457
00:31:04,630 --> 00:31:08,401
- What do you mean?
- Yeah, that's not cool.
458
00:31:08,434 --> 00:31:10,069
What's your name again?
459
00:31:10,103 --> 00:31:12,105
Michael.
460
00:31:12,138 --> 00:31:15,274
- Langdon.
- Michael Langdon.
461
00:31:15,308 --> 00:31:17,343
I mean, got to admit, that's
a little weak, right?
462
00:31:17,376 --> 00:31:19,078
Yeah.
463
00:31:19,112 --> 00:31:21,272
Shouldn't you be like Beelzebub
or some shit like that?
464
00:31:22,047 --> 00:31:24,417
Old Scratch?
465
00:31:24,450 --> 00:31:26,619
Dude, dude, dude.
466
00:31:26,652 --> 00:31:28,053
- Wait. No, no, Dude. Dude.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey. Ho.
467
00:31:28,087 --> 00:31:29,255
- Dude, dude. No, no, no.
- Ho.
468
00:31:29,288 --> 00:31:31,056
No, no, no.
We-we-we believe you.
469
00:31:31,090 --> 00:31:33,192
It... you know, I thought I'd be,
like, pissing my pants
470
00:31:33,226 --> 00:31:36,028
or something, and...
471
00:31:36,061 --> 00:31:38,097
I am dry as the Sahara, bro.
472
00:31:38,131 --> 00:31:40,065
Yeah. You got to look
at it from our shoes here.
473
00:31:40,099 --> 00:31:42,868
I mean, how do we know
you're the Antichrist?
474
00:31:42,901 --> 00:31:44,737
Yeah, how do we know?
475
00:32:01,954 --> 00:32:03,889
Yeah, I mean, that's cool,
476
00:32:03,922 --> 00:32:06,091
but it's just a tattoo
on your scalp.
477
00:32:06,125 --> 00:32:08,927
No. It's true.
I can feel the darkness.
478
00:32:08,961 --> 00:32:11,197
It's making me sick
and it's coming from him.
479
00:32:15,201 --> 00:32:17,102
- Shit!
- Holy shit!
480
00:32:23,809 --> 00:32:25,178
- Hail Satan.
- Hail Satan.
481
00:32:25,211 --> 00:32:27,780
Hail Satan.
482
00:32:27,813 --> 00:32:30,683
- Hail Satan.
- Satan, hail. Satan, hail.
483
00:32:30,716 --> 00:32:32,485
Dude, we owe everything
to your old man. Do you know
484
00:32:32,518 --> 00:32:34,520
how much time we wasted doing
the Silicon Valley grind
485
00:32:34,553 --> 00:32:37,356
- before we found our faith?
- For years we worked 20 hours
486
00:32:37,390 --> 00:32:39,325
a day in R&D for a company
whose nondisclosure agreements
487
00:32:39,358 --> 00:32:40,593
prevent us
from mentioning by name.
488
00:32:40,626 --> 00:32:41,927
But did Elon give us any credit?
489
00:32:41,960 --> 00:32:43,196
Any opportunity for advancement?
490
00:32:43,229 --> 00:32:45,264
- No!
- No! The fix is in, man.
491
00:32:45,298 --> 00:32:47,200
The world is run by prep school
failsons and Russian oligarchs.
492
00:32:47,233 --> 00:32:48,934
Everyone else just slaves away
493
00:32:48,967 --> 00:32:50,203
trying to make
these rich assholes richer.
494
00:32:50,236 --> 00:32:51,537
- Fuck that shit.
- Fuck it.
495
00:32:51,570 --> 00:32:53,138
- Fuck it.
- Fuck it.
496
00:32:53,172 --> 00:32:54,607
Why put in the work when there's
no reward, right?
497
00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:56,275
And then we learned the secret.
498
00:32:56,309 --> 00:32:58,010
The politicians,
the billionaires, the elite...
499
00:32:58,043 --> 00:33:00,145
they all made a deal to work
in his service.
500
00:33:00,179 --> 00:33:01,780
- My dad.
- Exactly.
501
00:33:01,814 --> 00:33:03,216
That's when we took
the plunge, too.
502
00:33:03,249 --> 00:33:05,318
Sold our souls. Did the whole
Black Mass thing.
503
00:33:05,351 --> 00:33:07,453
Now, we own
a robotics company worth...
504
00:33:07,486 --> 00:33:10,155
Billions.
505
00:33:10,189 --> 00:33:12,225
We inhale booger sugar
like it's fucking oxygen,
506
00:33:12,258 --> 00:33:15,127
and we bang Victoria's Secret
models every Tuesday.
507
00:33:15,160 --> 00:33:16,662
Fuck yeah.
508
00:33:16,695 --> 00:33:19,064
Thursdays we get Ryan Reynolds.
509
00:33:19,097 --> 00:33:22,235
The point is, it would be
an honor to play even
510
00:33:22,268 --> 00:33:24,203
a small role in bringing
the cosmic skid mark
511
00:33:24,237 --> 00:33:26,339
that is Planet Earth
to a fiery end.
512
00:33:26,372 --> 00:33:28,341
We are your servants, Michael.
513
00:33:28,374 --> 00:33:30,376
Now and forever.
514
00:33:30,409 --> 00:33:33,646
How can we help, even
in the most microscopic of ways?
515
00:33:33,679 --> 00:33:36,014
I lost someone very dear to me.
516
00:33:36,048 --> 00:33:38,217
My one true ally.
517
00:33:38,251 --> 00:33:41,287
You want to help?
Bring her back.
518
00:33:52,465 --> 00:33:55,167
You came to the right place.
519
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:59,204
Our AI tech makes HAL 9000
look like a fucking abacus.
520
00:33:59,238 --> 00:34:00,706
We can whip you up
521
00:34:00,739 --> 00:34:02,708
a new right-hand lickety-split,
player.
522
00:34:02,741 --> 00:34:04,076
You can?
523
00:34:04,109 --> 00:34:05,278
Tell us about her.
524
00:34:05,311 --> 00:34:07,280
Everything you can remember.
525
00:34:12,285 --> 00:34:16,422
No.
We owe him more than this.
526
00:34:16,455 --> 00:34:20,092
She's gonna be identical,
down to her final pube.
527
00:34:20,125 --> 00:34:21,794
No, it's not good enough, bro.
528
00:34:21,827 --> 00:34:23,729
Not when your client is
the spawn of Satan.
529
00:34:23,762 --> 00:34:25,097
Think.
530
00:34:25,130 --> 00:34:26,932
- I'm thinking!
- Think harder!
531
00:34:26,965 --> 00:34:29,034
- I'm thinking!
- Think faster!
532
00:34:31,304 --> 00:34:34,106
We need to make her Mossad.
533
00:34:34,139 --> 00:34:36,442
- Yeah!
- Mossad!
534
00:34:36,475 --> 00:34:37,910
Mossad!
535
00:35:10,809 --> 00:35:13,479
240 terabytes of memory,
536
00:35:13,512 --> 00:35:16,915
over 11,000 processor cores.
537
00:35:16,949 --> 00:35:19,652
She could crush Watson at
Jeopardy! and kick the asses
538
00:35:19,685 --> 00:35:22,655
- of every roided actor in
the Expendables franchise.
539
00:35:22,688 --> 00:35:24,423
She's amazing.
540
00:35:24,457 --> 00:35:27,125
Why is she so cold?
541
00:35:27,159 --> 00:35:29,962
That'll change with the flip
of her "on" switch.
542
00:35:29,995 --> 00:35:32,365
She's got a nanowire-based
lithium ion battery.
543
00:35:32,398 --> 00:35:34,166
Basically the Energizer Bunny's
wet dream.
544
00:35:34,199 --> 00:35:37,436
We fire her up,
she goes on forever.
545
00:35:37,470 --> 00:35:40,205
Just don't tell her
she's a biomechanical humanoid.
546
00:35:40,238 --> 00:35:42,107
At least not at first.
547
00:35:42,140 --> 00:35:44,677
It'll send her into the mother
of all existential crises.
548
00:35:44,710 --> 00:35:47,279
She could end up killing
herself, maybe others.
549
00:35:47,312 --> 00:35:49,548
Seriously, I've seen it happen.
550
00:35:49,582 --> 00:35:53,018
Not worth the headache.
551
00:35:54,353 --> 00:35:56,389
And now...
552
00:35:56,422 --> 00:36:01,126
Kineros Robotics proudly
presents...
553
00:36:01,159 --> 00:36:05,864
the Battle-Ax... Miriam Mead 2.0.
554
00:36:08,367 --> 00:36:11,804
Now, don't expect her to be
her old self right away.
555
00:36:11,837 --> 00:36:13,972
It's gonna take her time.
556
00:36:14,006 --> 00:36:15,641
She needs to learn from you.
557
00:36:15,674 --> 00:36:17,476
Build a rapport.
558
00:36:17,510 --> 00:36:19,678
Like any relationship.
559
00:36:45,037 --> 00:36:47,440
How I've missed you, Michael.
560
00:36:49,442 --> 00:36:51,477
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Media Access Group at WGBH
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