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1
00:00:07,510 --> 00:00:09,300
- We're going to sleep in tents.
- Yeah.
2
00:00:09,301 --> 00:00:10,821
We get to have a campfire.
3
00:00:10,822 --> 00:00:12,870
And we get to poop
off the side of rocks.
4
00:00:12,871 --> 00:00:15,173
Oh, that sounds great.
But listen, darling,
5
00:00:15,174 --> 00:00:16,292
you have to remember,
6
00:00:16,293 --> 00:00:19,755
that has to stop the
minute you get home. Okay.
7
00:00:19,756 --> 00:00:21,326
- Oh, hey, Mom.
- Yeah.
8
00:00:21,327 --> 00:00:23,007
What if I miss you
during the night?
9
00:00:23,008 --> 00:00:24,392
Oh, that's no problem.
10
00:00:24,393 --> 00:00:26,620
That's why we have
the plan, right?
11
00:00:26,621 --> 00:00:29,627
See, you're going to go up
on the bus with your class,
12
00:00:29,628 --> 00:00:33,582
and then Daddy and Uncle Matthew and
Barb and I are going to drive up,
13
00:00:33,583 --> 00:00:36,785
and we're going to stay at a motel
that's two minutes from the campsite
14
00:00:36,786 --> 00:00:37,994
just in case you need us.
15
00:00:37,995 --> 00:00:41,051
Plus, you've got the walkie-talkie,
so you can call whenever you want.
16
00:00:41,052 --> 00:00:43,431
Okay, honey, so Mommy's going
to be at the Golden Door Spa,
17
00:00:43,432 --> 00:00:46,712
but I'll probably be in treatments
all day, so that means no phones.
18
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,971
But shoved some extra cash
in your sleeping bag,
19
00:00:48,972 --> 00:00:52,704
so if there's an emergency,
just pay someone to help you.
20
00:00:52,705 --> 00:00:54,803
Are you going to be okay, Mom?
21
00:00:54,804 --> 00:00:56,501
Yeah.
22
00:00:56,502 --> 00:00:58,294
I don't have to go.
23
00:00:58,295 --> 00:01:00,883
No, you should go
with your friends.
24
00:01:00,884 --> 00:01:02,604
I'll be fine at home.
25
00:01:02,605 --> 00:01:04,864
Daddy's there.
26
00:01:04,865 --> 00:01:07,365
Oh, I love you so much.
27
00:01:07,515 --> 00:01:09,974
I really think you're
going to make it this time.
28
00:01:09,975 --> 00:01:12,475
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
29
00:01:13,702 --> 00:01:18,302
I really think you're
going to make it this time.
30
00:01:19,373 --> 00:01:21,873
Mom?
31
00:01:23,253 --> 00:01:24,882
All right, parents.
32
00:01:24,883 --> 00:01:27,731
Say good-bye to your
child and clear the area.
33
00:01:27,732 --> 00:01:31,033
If you've said good-bye,
you have no reason to be here.
34
00:01:31,034 --> 00:01:32,304
Let's go.
35
00:01:32,305 --> 00:01:35,542
Campbell, get your
buttons in the bus.
36
00:01:35,543 --> 00:01:36,583
- Bye, Mom.
- Bye, darling.
37
00:01:36,584 --> 00:01:37,834
You're going to do
great, sweetie.
38
00:01:37,835 --> 00:01:39,804
Hey, listen, uh, Coach Hammond.
39
00:01:39,805 --> 00:01:42,851
Um, Ritchie's never made
it through a sleepover,
40
00:01:42,852 --> 00:01:45,793
so if you could keep an eye on him,
he's very sensitive.
41
00:01:45,794 --> 00:01:47,654
He also lies about
brushing his teeth.
42
00:01:47,655 --> 00:01:49,321
- Miss Campbell?
- Yes.
43
00:01:49,322 --> 00:01:52,544
I have been leading this troop
successfully for 16 years...
44
00:01:52,545 --> 00:01:54,742
over the past 18 years.
45
00:01:54,743 --> 00:01:58,103
You have very little
to worry about.
46
00:01:58,292 --> 00:02:00,792
All right! Let's go.
47
00:02:00,985 --> 00:02:03,104
Bye, Mom.
48
00:02:03,105 --> 00:02:05,605
Bye, sweetie.
49
00:02:06,144 --> 00:02:08,644
- See ya.
- See ya.
50
00:02:32,213 --> 00:02:37,693
# That's the night when the lights #
# went out in Georgia #
51
00:02:37,703 --> 00:02:42,813
# That's the night that they hung #
# an immigrant ham #
52
00:02:44,642 --> 00:02:46,854
You pretty sure you got the
words right to that song?
53
00:02:46,855 --> 00:02:49,355
Yeah.
54
00:02:53,064 --> 00:02:56,274
I got a knot right in
the middle of my back.
55
00:02:56,275 --> 00:02:57,784
Can you see if you
can get in there?
56
00:02:57,785 --> 00:02:59,491
Oh, you have come
to right place.
57
00:02:59,492 --> 00:03:01,492
My mom used to make
me rub her feet.
58
00:03:01,493 --> 00:03:04,594
She said I have magic fingers,
and called me her little Romeo,
59
00:03:04,595 --> 00:03:08,905
and-- I don't want to
talk about this anymore.
60
00:03:10,862 --> 00:03:12,394
What are you thinking about?
61
00:03:12,395 --> 00:03:15,435
Boy, I don't miss
that question.
62
00:03:15,523 --> 00:03:18,012
You thinking about
New Christine?
63
00:03:18,013 --> 00:03:18,964
What?
64
00:03:18,965 --> 00:03:21,073
Well, you haven't heard
from her in a month.
65
00:03:21,074 --> 00:03:23,462
You might be a
little freaked out.
66
00:03:23,463 --> 00:03:24,682
I'm not freaked out.
67
00:03:24,683 --> 00:03:26,224
We're on a break; it's fine.
68
00:03:26,225 --> 00:03:28,351
Besides, I'm not talking
about this with you.
69
00:03:28,352 --> 00:03:29,363
Why?
70
00:03:29,364 --> 00:03:31,123
Because you're my ex-wife.
71
00:03:31,124 --> 00:03:32,862
I'm also your friend.
72
00:03:32,863 --> 00:03:34,833
You're not my friend.
73
00:03:34,834 --> 00:03:37,964
What? Come on.
I might even be your best friend.
74
00:03:37,965 --> 00:03:39,714
Come on,
say that we're friends.
75
00:03:39,715 --> 00:03:41,044
Why is it so important to you?
76
00:03:41,045 --> 00:03:43,634
Because I hate that you say
we're not friends-- we are.
77
00:03:43,635 --> 00:03:45,331
Nobody has what we have.
78
00:03:45,332 --> 00:03:47,564
We could write a book
about the perfect divorce.
79
00:03:47,565 --> 00:03:51,684
I'm telling you, if we'd gotten divorced
earlier, we'd probably still be married.
80
00:03:51,685 --> 00:03:54,185
Oh, God, yeah.
81
00:03:54,224 --> 00:03:56,634
- Right there, that's it.
- Is that it?
82
00:03:56,635 --> 00:03:58,151
That's it.
83
00:03:58,152 --> 00:03:59,404
Harder.
84
00:03:59,405 --> 00:04:00,603
Harder.
85
00:04:00,604 --> 00:04:02,222
Don't stop.
86
00:04:02,223 --> 00:04:04,829
Oh... yeah.
87
00:04:10,965 --> 00:04:12,744
What happened? Why'd you stop?
88
00:04:12,745 --> 00:04:14,734
I had to, my hands hurt,
I'm tired.
89
00:04:14,735 --> 00:04:18,515
I don't want to talk
about this anymore.
90
00:04:19,514 --> 00:04:22,162
# Georgia Patrol #
# were making their rounds #
91
00:04:22,163 --> 00:04:25,012
# And they fired a shot #
# just to flag him down #
92
00:04:25,013 --> 00:04:27,744
# And a pig-bellied sheriff #
# grabbed his gum and said #
93
00:04:27,745 --> 00:04:29,963
# "Why'd you chew it?" #
94
00:04:29,964 --> 00:04:32,464
Sing it.
95
00:04:40,828 --> 00:04:43,418
And here's your second room.
96
00:04:45,158 --> 00:04:48,488
Well, this one smells
less like armpit.
97
00:04:48,489 --> 00:04:50,989
No, it's a tie.
98
00:04:51,237 --> 00:04:54,695
Okay, Barb, you and I will take this
one, and you guys are next door.
99
00:04:54,696 --> 00:04:58,448
Oh, because it's off-season,
we cut back on some of our amenities.
100
00:04:58,449 --> 00:05:00,949
There's no room service,
the pool has been drained,
101
00:05:00,949 --> 00:05:03,216
and coffee shop's closed.
102
00:05:03,217 --> 00:05:05,317
This is the desert's
peak season.
103
00:05:05,318 --> 00:05:07,135
Is it?
104
00:05:07,136 --> 00:05:10,436
I don't know. My mom gave me
this motel to keep me busy
105
00:05:10,437 --> 00:05:12,937
now that I'm out of rehab.
106
00:05:16,597 --> 00:05:18,457
Oh, hey, listen.
107
00:05:18,458 --> 00:05:21,496
If someone knocks on the
door three times quiet
108
00:05:21,497 --> 00:05:24,576
and then three more times,
don't open it. Just...
109
00:05:24,577 --> 00:05:28,357
tell them to go to
the manager's office.
110
00:05:31,929 --> 00:05:34,779
I think he's going to make it.
111
00:05:35,056 --> 00:05:41,045
Oh. I hope there's a blow dryer in the
room, 'cause I forgot to bring mine.
112
00:05:41,046 --> 00:05:43,816
I'm going to go check it out.
113
00:05:44,988 --> 00:05:47,036
God, this sucks!
114
00:05:47,037 --> 00:05:49,932
No room service, no restaurant.
115
00:05:50,046 --> 00:05:53,555
Richard's hair is going to
be all wild and unruly.
116
00:05:53,556 --> 00:05:56,925
I'm starving, too. I mean, all I've
got is an unwrapped piece of gum
117
00:05:56,926 --> 00:05:59,716
and an Advil stuck to a penny.
118
00:05:59,717 --> 00:06:02,865
I saw a mini-mart down the highway.
I'm going to go get us some snacks.
119
00:06:02,866 --> 00:06:04,326
Good. Matthew, go with her.
120
00:06:04,327 --> 00:06:07,067
It's dark out there,
and there's coyotes and road runners...
121
00:06:07,068 --> 00:06:09,706
And rocket-powered
roller skates.
122
00:06:09,707 --> 00:06:11,865
She'll be fine.
It's just a couple of miles back.
123
00:06:11,866 --> 00:06:13,186
Matthew, just go with her.
124
00:06:13,187 --> 00:06:15,158
I don't want to be
alone with Barb.
125
00:06:15,159 --> 00:06:18,245
Why? Just don't piss her off.
You'll be fine.
126
00:06:18,246 --> 00:06:19,917
It's not that.
127
00:06:19,918 --> 00:06:22,418
Before... in the car,
128
00:06:22,639 --> 00:06:25,919
I was rubbing her back,
and then...
129
00:06:26,789 --> 00:06:29,289
What?
130
00:06:29,969 --> 00:06:32,469
Oh, my God.
131
00:06:32,537 --> 00:06:35,595
What are you telling me?
Stuff happened?
132
00:06:35,596 --> 00:06:36,947
Yeah.
133
00:06:36,948 --> 00:06:39,824
- Stuff happened?
- No!
134
00:06:40,088 --> 00:06:43,271
I had an emotion. A feeling.
135
00:06:43,377 --> 00:06:46,136
I started thinking about her the
way I did when I first met her,
136
00:06:46,137 --> 00:06:48,648
you know, when you brought her
home from college that weekend.
137
00:06:48,649 --> 00:06:51,657
She was sitting beside
the above-ground pool,
138
00:06:51,658 --> 00:06:55,062
rubbing baby oil...
all over herself.
139
00:06:55,898 --> 00:06:57,886
Cold water, Larry King,
Mom's feet, you.
140
00:06:57,887 --> 00:06:59,847
Cold water, Larry King,
Mom's feet, you.
141
00:06:59,848 --> 00:07:03,674
- Cold water, Larry King...
- Hey! Hey! Hey, cut it out.
142
00:07:03,675 --> 00:07:05,821
Barb is married.
143
00:07:05,822 --> 00:07:08,992
You could do a
lot worse than me.
144
00:07:09,597 --> 00:07:11,379
All right,
I'm sorry I brought it up.
145
00:07:11,380 --> 00:07:13,618
- So to speak.
- Okay, stop it.
146
00:07:13,619 --> 00:07:15,767
- Control yourself.
- It's hard!
147
00:07:15,768 --> 00:07:19,258
- So to speak.
- All right, I'm done.
148
00:07:19,756 --> 00:07:21,937
God.
149
00:07:21,938 --> 00:07:24,175
Damn. There's no
reception up here.
150
00:07:24,176 --> 00:07:26,356
Oh, yeah,
that's why I brought walkie-talkies.
151
00:07:26,357 --> 00:07:29,747
Oh. 'Cause you were thinking
New Christine might want to call?
152
00:07:29,748 --> 00:07:31,848
No, I wasn't thinking that.
153
00:07:31,849 --> 00:07:34,885
God, I'm starving.
Don't they even have a minibar?
154
00:07:34,886 --> 00:07:37,027
All right, all right,
I got something.
155
00:07:37,028 --> 00:07:39,155
Is it food?
156
00:07:39,156 --> 00:07:42,077
I'd say it's either
a lime or a testicle.
157
00:07:42,078 --> 00:07:44,578
Ooh. Give me half.
158
00:07:49,668 --> 00:07:52,741
Ritchie? Hi, honey, it's Mommy.
159
00:07:52,846 --> 00:07:55,958
It's Mommy.
Are you okay, Ritchie?
160
00:07:55,959 --> 00:07:58,459
Ms. Campbell?
161
00:07:58,727 --> 00:08:01,227
Lovie?
162
00:08:01,417 --> 00:08:03,725
No, it's Coach Hammond.
163
00:08:03,726 --> 00:08:06,428
I found this walkie-talkie
in your son's tent.
164
00:08:06,429 --> 00:08:09,227
I'm radioing to tell you
I'm confiscating it,
165
00:08:09,228 --> 00:08:10,825
and you won't be hearing from him.
166
00:08:10,826 --> 00:08:12,645
Over.
167
00:08:12,646 --> 00:08:14,977
What?
168
00:08:14,978 --> 00:08:19,356
If you're done talking,
you need to say, "Over." Over.
169
00:08:19,357 --> 00:08:23,427
Okay, over. Um, you know,
I'm sorry if I broke the rules,
170
00:08:23,428 --> 00:08:26,277
but, um,
I'm just really worried about Ritchie.
171
00:08:26,278 --> 00:08:29,005
Like I told you, he's never
spent the night away from home,
172
00:08:29,006 --> 00:08:33,576
and it's very important to
me that he feel safe, and...
173
00:08:33,577 --> 00:08:36,406
Ms. Campbell, please,
Ritchie is fine.
174
00:08:36,407 --> 00:08:39,367
You'll see him tomorrow afternoon
when the trip is over. Over.
175
00:08:39,368 --> 00:08:41,868
But what if he needs me?
176
00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:50,236
Over.
177
00:08:50,997 --> 00:08:53,956
Ritchie isn't the only kid
to be a little anxious.
178
00:08:53,957 --> 00:08:56,147
He's not even the only
one on this trip.
179
00:08:56,148 --> 00:08:57,716
I see it all the time,
180
00:08:57,717 --> 00:09:03,417
especially with the boys raised
by overprotective mothers. Over.
181
00:09:03,939 --> 00:09:06,785
Hey, you know what?
I'm not overprotective, okay?
182
00:09:06,786 --> 00:09:09,655
Just last week,
I lost him at the Farmer's Market,
183
00:09:09,656 --> 00:09:13,396
so if anything,
I'm under protective. Over.
184
00:09:13,397 --> 00:09:17,188
He's going to be fine, and he's
going to feel proud when he makes it.
185
00:09:17,189 --> 00:09:21,159
We'll see you tomorrow,
Ms. Campbell. Over.
186
00:09:21,716 --> 00:09:25,368
We came all the way
up here for nothing.
187
00:09:25,369 --> 00:09:28,958
I just discovered what
smells like armpit.
188
00:09:28,959 --> 00:09:30,647
Oh, no, wait.
189
00:09:30,648 --> 00:09:33,148
That's my armpit.
190
00:09:34,237 --> 00:09:36,918
Man, I cannot get
rid of this knot.
191
00:09:36,919 --> 00:09:39,266
Maybe we can pick up some
lotion at the mini-mart
192
00:09:39,267 --> 00:09:42,647
and you can do me
when we get back.
193
00:09:43,907 --> 00:09:46,947
Uh, so how's your
husband, Pete?
194
00:09:47,368 --> 00:09:49,416
I don't know. Pete's Pete.
195
00:09:49,417 --> 00:09:51,385
Actually, things
aren't going great.
196
00:09:51,386 --> 00:09:53,775
Ever since we've reconciled,
things have gotten worse.
197
00:09:53,776 --> 00:09:56,316
He goes out of town every
time he gets the chance.
198
00:09:56,317 --> 00:09:59,285
My neck's messed up from
sleeping in the guest room.
199
00:09:59,286 --> 00:10:01,085
We haven't had sex
in three months.
200
00:10:01,086 --> 00:10:03,586
How's your mom?
201
00:10:03,736 --> 00:10:06,637
Pete and I haven't even
kissed in over six months.
202
00:10:06,638 --> 00:10:09,375
Which should tell you a little
something about what the sex was like
203
00:10:09,376 --> 00:10:11,796
three months ago.
204
00:10:11,797 --> 00:10:16,957
Wait, didn't you have a cousin
worked at Baskin Robbins?
205
00:10:21,709 --> 00:10:24,209
Did I just piss you off?
206
00:10:25,066 --> 00:10:27,415
Damn it. We're out of gas.
207
00:10:27,416 --> 00:10:29,458
Out of gas?
How can you be out of gas?
208
00:10:29,459 --> 00:10:31,436
Pete usually fills my tank.
209
00:10:31,437 --> 00:10:36,816
As I think I mentioned, Pete hasn't
filled my tank in over three months.
210
00:10:36,817 --> 00:10:39,317
God.
211
00:10:39,398 --> 00:10:41,325
Ah. Relax.
212
00:10:41,326 --> 00:10:45,766
The motel's is not that far--
we can walk back.
213
00:10:56,006 --> 00:10:59,152
Boy... God's got
a lot of rules.
214
00:11:03,359 --> 00:11:04,676
Did she call?
215
00:11:04,677 --> 00:11:05,676
Who?
216
00:11:05,677 --> 00:11:06,935
New Christine.
217
00:11:06,936 --> 00:11:09,516
Isn't that why you're
checking your messages?
218
00:11:09,517 --> 00:11:12,018
I mean, the only other person
who calls you is your best friend
219
00:11:12,019 --> 00:11:14,519
and I'm right here.
220
00:11:18,066 --> 00:11:19,378
You're not my friend.
221
00:11:19,379 --> 00:11:21,368
I am.
222
00:11:21,369 --> 00:11:25,006
Seriously, this is, like,
crazy what you guys are doing.
223
00:11:25,007 --> 00:11:26,245
Call her.
224
00:11:26,246 --> 00:11:30,568
I'll bet she's sitting at home checking
her messages every five minutes, too.
225
00:11:30,569 --> 00:11:31,656
How do you know?
226
00:11:31,657 --> 00:11:32,957
Because I know women.
227
00:11:32,958 --> 00:11:36,177
And I'll bet if you pick up that
phone right now and you call her,
228
00:11:36,178 --> 00:11:38,966
she will be thrilled
to hear from you.
229
00:11:38,967 --> 00:11:40,488
She said she wanted space.
230
00:11:40,489 --> 00:11:43,007
Nobody wants space.
Believe me, I've had plenty of space.
231
00:11:43,008 --> 00:11:46,858
You know what I filled
it up with? Crazy.
232
00:11:46,859 --> 00:11:48,125
So you think I should call her?
233
00:11:48,126 --> 00:11:49,226
Absolutely.
234
00:11:49,227 --> 00:11:53,148
I think it would make
her feel cared about.
235
00:11:53,149 --> 00:11:54,608
All right, I'll call her.
236
00:11:54,609 --> 00:11:56,386
Really? You're going
to take my advice?
237
00:11:56,387 --> 00:11:57,635
Yeah. Makes sense.
238
00:11:57,636 --> 00:11:59,658
Ha! And you know
why it makes sense?
239
00:11:59,659 --> 00:12:02,159
'Cause I'm your friend.
240
00:12:03,246 --> 00:12:07,336
I cannot believe they only charge
59 bucks for these two rooms.
241
00:12:07,337 --> 00:12:09,837
They're nice.
242
00:12:09,838 --> 00:12:12,338
God, my house is a dump.
243
00:12:15,939 --> 00:12:17,677
Hey, Christine.
244
00:12:17,678 --> 00:12:19,257
It's me.
245
00:12:19,258 --> 00:12:21,375
Listen, I just wanted
to give you a call
246
00:12:21,376 --> 00:12:23,106
and let you know
that I miss you.
247
00:12:23,107 --> 00:12:27,076
And I know you said you
wanted some space, but...
248
00:12:27,077 --> 00:12:29,577
What?
249
00:12:30,108 --> 00:12:34,728
I don't know what this is,
but it ain't no lime.
250
00:12:36,266 --> 00:12:37,948
No. That's okay.
251
00:12:37,949 --> 00:12:39,938
I guess I thought that...
252
00:12:39,939 --> 00:12:41,498
Okay, great.
253
00:12:41,499 --> 00:12:43,999
Well, have fun.
254
00:12:44,928 --> 00:12:47,825
See? She was home,
waiting by the phone.
255
00:12:47,826 --> 00:12:49,446
Yeah, Christine, she was home.
256
00:12:49,447 --> 00:12:53,127
She was home cooking
another man dinner.
257
00:12:54,079 --> 00:12:56,447
By the phone?
258
00:12:56,448 --> 00:12:58,847
Damn it!
Why did I listen to you?
259
00:12:58,848 --> 00:13:00,978
We're not on a break,
we're broken up.
260
00:13:00,979 --> 00:13:03,485
She's on a date.
She's cooking dinner for him,
261
00:13:03,486 --> 00:13:05,886
and I heard Norah Jones
in the background.
262
00:13:05,887 --> 00:13:08,594
She knows Norah Jones?
263
00:13:09,116 --> 00:13:11,698
No, she was playing
Norah Jones.
264
00:13:11,699 --> 00:13:13,477
Which is her sexy music.
265
00:13:13,478 --> 00:13:17,127
And she was pissed that I called.
She thinks we're done.
266
00:13:17,128 --> 00:13:20,382
God. That is so awful.
267
00:13:21,529 --> 00:13:24,026
How did she get a date already?
268
00:13:24,027 --> 00:13:27,147
I've been single
for three years.
269
00:13:27,148 --> 00:13:28,688
Damn it, Christine.
270
00:13:28,689 --> 00:13:31,189
I'm so sorry.
271
00:13:37,628 --> 00:13:40,128
Is it a lime?
272
00:13:56,250 --> 00:13:58,750
Are we dead?
273
00:13:59,230 --> 00:14:01,730
No, but the battery is.
274
00:14:02,421 --> 00:14:04,830
Great. So this is the end.
275
00:14:04,831 --> 00:14:09,618
And there are so many embarrassing
things in my dresser drawer.
276
00:14:09,619 --> 00:14:13,701
I'm starving, I'm freezing,
I've had to pee for the last two hours,
277
00:14:13,702 --> 00:14:17,571
and I'm really scared,
because now I don't.
278
00:14:17,572 --> 00:14:20,072
I got to do something.
279
00:14:28,272 --> 00:14:30,782
So, uh, what are you doing?
280
00:14:31,132 --> 00:14:33,632
Looking for a blanket.
281
00:14:35,710 --> 00:14:38,098
Are you eating something?
282
00:14:38,099 --> 00:14:40,259
No.
283
00:14:40,260 --> 00:14:43,668
It was a protein bar.
It has extra calcium.
284
00:14:43,669 --> 00:14:46,169
It's for women.
285
00:14:46,872 --> 00:14:49,260
It's the only food that we had.
286
00:14:49,261 --> 00:14:51,761
I had.
287
00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:54,590
Ah, here we go.
288
00:14:54,852 --> 00:14:57,352
A sleeping bag.
289
00:14:57,491 --> 00:15:00,851
Ooh, and something
to keep you warm.
290
00:15:03,809 --> 00:15:07,189
I hope they don't
find me this way.
291
00:15:15,062 --> 00:15:17,291
- Okay, get in.
- What?
292
00:15:17,292 --> 00:15:20,001
Get in here with me.
We have to keep each other warm.
293
00:15:20,002 --> 00:15:22,612
No, I'm fine. It's two-ply.
294
00:15:23,739 --> 00:15:27,099
Matthew, it's freezing.
Just get in.
295
00:15:34,081 --> 00:15:37,321
Richard, I'm sorry.
Come on, I was trying to help.
296
00:15:37,322 --> 00:15:38,708
Don't be mad at me.
297
00:15:38,709 --> 00:15:41,210
I honestly thought
I knew women.
298
00:15:41,211 --> 00:15:47,081
How was I supposed to know she's all
full of boundaries and self-esteem?
299
00:15:47,082 --> 00:15:49,582
Over.
300
00:15:51,499 --> 00:15:53,620
You know what?
I don't think you're really mad at me.
301
00:15:53,621 --> 00:15:55,868
I think that your
feelings are hurt,
302
00:15:55,869 --> 00:15:58,398
and you're sad
about the breakup.
303
00:15:58,399 --> 00:16:00,899
Come on, I know men.
304
00:16:01,350 --> 00:16:02,570
Let me help you.
305
00:16:02,571 --> 00:16:05,071
Richard, buddy...
306
00:16:05,179 --> 00:16:08,799
what can I do to make
you feel better?
307
00:16:10,709 --> 00:16:12,059
Want to make me feel better?
308
00:16:12,060 --> 00:16:13,770
I do. What do you want, pal?
309
00:16:13,771 --> 00:16:16,271
I want sex.
310
00:16:16,491 --> 00:16:18,799
With who?
311
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:21,300
You, pal.
312
00:16:26,052 --> 00:16:28,832
Well, that's definitely warmer.
313
00:16:30,010 --> 00:16:33,390
I don't know where
to put my hands.
314
00:16:33,529 --> 00:16:36,029
I'm turning around.
315
00:16:44,261 --> 00:16:48,071
Ah, when did you dip
yourself in vanilla?
316
00:16:48,211 --> 00:16:50,711
I didn't.
317
00:16:55,779 --> 00:17:02,259
All I'm gonna say is a snake better
have snuck into this sleeping bag.
318
00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:16,559
Campbell, is that you?!
319
00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:18,598
No, it's Ritchie.
Can I come in?
320
00:17:18,599 --> 00:17:19,918
Why are you out of your tent?
321
00:17:19,919 --> 00:17:21,388
I heard a noise.
322
00:17:21,389 --> 00:17:23,970
Oh, it was probably
just the wind or...
323
00:17:23,971 --> 00:17:25,828
a gentle squirrel.
324
00:17:25,829 --> 00:17:28,708
The desert is full
of all sorts of...
325
00:17:28,709 --> 00:17:31,039
What the hell was that?!
326
00:17:31,040 --> 00:17:33,691
I want that flap closed!
In or out, Campbell?!
327
00:17:33,692 --> 00:17:36,192
In! In! In! In!
328
00:17:39,060 --> 00:17:43,667
- Easy. Easy. Easy...
- Easy, easy...
329
00:17:47,111 --> 00:17:48,681
That's insane.
330
00:17:48,682 --> 00:17:49,960
Why is it insane?
331
00:17:49,961 --> 00:17:51,691
You say you're my friend,
but if you were really my friend,
332
00:17:51,692 --> 00:17:53,069
you would have sex with me.
333
00:17:53,070 --> 00:17:55,688
Richard, I don't have
sex with my friends.
334
00:17:55,689 --> 00:17:57,871
Paul Simpson, Eddie Gibb,
Sue Gottlieb...
335
00:17:57,872 --> 00:17:59,469
Anymore.
336
00:17:59,470 --> 00:18:02,170
I've wasted three weeks thinking
I was involved with someone
337
00:18:02,171 --> 00:18:03,251
when I wasn't.
338
00:18:03,252 --> 00:18:05,431
Christine, I haven't
had sex in three weeks.
339
00:18:05,432 --> 00:18:07,330
Three weeks. Oh, my God.
340
00:18:07,331 --> 00:18:09,380
You're like the
freaking Dalai Lama.
341
00:18:09,381 --> 00:18:11,130
And you're probably
coming up on a year.
342
00:18:11,131 --> 00:18:13,628
Hey! No.
343
00:18:13,629 --> 00:18:17,249
Wait, when did I go
down to the river?
344
00:18:17,439 --> 00:18:20,869
Anyway, listen, Richard,
I actually like what we have now, okay?
345
00:18:20,870 --> 00:18:22,878
And I don't want to
ruin our friendship.
346
00:18:22,879 --> 00:18:27,461
How would you like to make
it the best friendship ever?
347
00:18:27,462 --> 00:18:31,008
This is exactly how
Sue Gottlieb got me.
348
00:18:31,009 --> 00:18:33,491
Christine, there
is no downside.
349
00:18:33,492 --> 00:18:35,829
It's pure sex.
350
00:18:35,830 --> 00:18:38,330
Pure sex.
351
00:18:38,532 --> 00:18:40,998
I like the sound of that.
352
00:18:40,999 --> 00:18:43,499
So what do you think?
353
00:18:43,541 --> 00:18:45,368
I don't know.
354
00:18:45,369 --> 00:18:46,499
I don't know?
355
00:18:46,500 --> 00:18:47,961
Does that mean you're
thinking about it?
356
00:18:47,962 --> 00:18:50,462
Just give me a minute.
357
00:18:58,809 --> 00:19:00,448
Okay.
358
00:19:00,449 --> 00:19:03,619
But I'm gonna need
to be seduced.
359
00:19:04,451 --> 00:19:06,951
Okay.
360
00:19:08,149 --> 00:19:10,649
Come on, man!
361
00:19:14,450 --> 00:19:16,281
Ritchie?
362
00:19:16,282 --> 00:19:18,782
Mom?
363
00:19:22,412 --> 00:19:25,292
It's morning, kid. You made it.
364
00:19:25,992 --> 00:19:27,870
Hey, I did.
365
00:19:27,871 --> 00:19:30,700
Now, get back to your tent
before the other kids wake up,
366
00:19:30,701 --> 00:19:32,899
so they won't know
that you slept here.
367
00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:34,100
Why?
368
00:19:34,101 --> 00:19:36,931
Well, because kids can be mean.
369
00:19:36,931 --> 00:19:39,371
They can call you Stork...
370
00:19:39,372 --> 00:19:41,872
Ms. Ham and Eggs...
371
00:19:42,150 --> 00:19:44,650
Coach Never Getting Married.
372
00:19:46,321 --> 00:19:48,319
I'm gonna go.
373
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,820
Okay.
374
00:20:08,607 --> 00:20:11,107
Hey.
375
00:20:12,011 --> 00:20:14,140
So...
376
00:20:14,141 --> 00:20:16,080
here we are.
377
00:20:16,081 --> 00:20:18,581
Yeah.
378
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:22,058
And you know what's great?
379
00:20:22,059 --> 00:20:24,147
I don't feel weird.
380
00:20:24,148 --> 00:20:25,618
Me neither.
381
00:20:25,619 --> 00:20:28,256
We did it, it was great.
382
00:20:28,539 --> 00:20:31,039
It was good.
383
00:20:31,328 --> 00:20:32,690
It was great.
384
00:20:32,691 --> 00:20:33,960
It was sex.
385
00:20:33,961 --> 00:20:35,049
And we're done.
386
00:20:35,050 --> 00:20:36,990
No downside.
387
00:20:36,991 --> 00:20:39,198
Pure sex.
388
00:20:39,199 --> 00:20:40,860
Were you ever gonna
come looking for us?!
389
00:20:40,861 --> 00:20:43,981
We were out there
all damn night!
390
00:20:46,451 --> 00:20:48,180
You want to walk
back to the car?
391
00:20:48,181 --> 00:20:51,221
I'm walking back
to Los Angeles.
28200
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