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1
00:00:02,836 --> 00:00:05,714
- She totally winked at me!
- She did not wink at you.
2
00:00:05,881 --> 00:00:08,884
You always think somebody's
winking at you.
3
00:01:11,947 --> 00:01:14,449
I say "tupelo honey"
by Van Morrison.
4
00:01:14,616 --> 00:01:15,993
No way!
5
00:01:16,159 --> 00:01:18,996
The most romantic song ever
was "the way we were."
6
00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:24,334
Ah, I think the one that Elton John wrote
for, um, that guy on who's the boss?
7
00:01:26,336 --> 00:01:28,297
- What song was that?
- Um.
8
00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:31,675
Hold me close, young Tony danza
9
00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,848
Phoebe: Hi, Monica.
Ross: Hi, mon.
10
00:01:38,015 --> 00:01:39,683
Rachel: Hey, mon.
11
00:01:41,560 --> 00:01:42,978
Oh, my god!
12
00:01:43,145 --> 00:01:44,980
- Has she slept at all?
- Ross: Nope.
13
00:01:45,147 --> 00:01:47,065
It's been three nights in a row.
14
00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:49,067
She finally stopped crying yesterday.
15
00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:52,362
But then she found one of Richard's
cigar butts on the terrace...
16
00:01:52,529 --> 00:01:56,950
Oh. Okay, that explains it.
I got a call at 2 in the morning...
17
00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:59,369
And all I could hear
was this squeaky sound.
18
00:01:59,578 --> 00:02:02,205
So I thought,
"oh, it's a mouse or a possum."
19
00:02:03,874 --> 00:02:07,210
Then I realized, like, okay...
20
00:02:07,377 --> 00:02:11,423
Where would a mouse or a possum
get the money to make the phone call?
21
00:02:14,217 --> 00:02:16,637
- Chandler: Morning.
- Morning. Hey.
22
00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:18,639
You made pancakes?
23
00:02:20,057 --> 00:02:22,309
Yeah, like there's any way
I could ever do that.
24
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:26,021
Monica and Rachel had syrup
25
00:02:26,188 --> 00:02:29,441
uh, uh
now I can get my man to cheer up
26
00:02:32,027 --> 00:02:33,445
Good morning, Joey.
27
00:02:33,612 --> 00:02:34,905
Good morning.
28
00:02:35,947 --> 00:02:37,032
Here's a thought.
29
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:40,077
Why don't you stay home from work
and just hang out with me?
30
00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:41,328
Oh, I wish.
31
00:02:41,495 --> 00:02:44,706
You have that report to finish,
and I've got to see my lawyer.
32
00:02:44,873 --> 00:02:48,043
I can't believe I date
a girl who's getting divorced.
33
00:02:48,210 --> 00:02:50,671
- I'm such a grownup.
- Ha-ha-ha.
34
00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:52,547
I gotta go, I gotta go.
35
00:02:52,714 --> 00:02:54,091
Not without a kiss.
36
00:02:54,257 --> 00:02:56,385
Maybe I won't kiss you
so you'll stay.
37
00:02:56,551 --> 00:02:58,762
Kiss her. Kiss her!
38
00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:03,225
I'll see you later, sweetie.
Bye, Joey.
39
00:03:03,392 --> 00:03:05,435
Bye-bye, Janice.
40
00:03:07,604 --> 00:03:09,147
So when are you dumping her?
41
00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:10,399
Nope.
42
00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:14,319
Heh. Come on, quit yanking me.
43
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:19,449
I'm not yanking you.
44
00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:23,036
- This is Janice.
- Yeah, I know.
45
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:24,788
She makes me happy.
46
00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:28,083
Okay. All right.
47
00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:31,753
You look me in the eye and tell me,
without blinking...
48
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:34,756
That you're not breaking up
with her. No blinking.
49
00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:39,386
I'm not breaking up with her!
50
00:03:45,100 --> 00:03:46,560
Ah!
51
00:03:46,768 --> 00:03:47,853
What's that?
52
00:03:48,019 --> 00:03:50,522
God, look what I found in the drain!
53
00:03:50,689 --> 00:03:52,149
What?
54
00:03:53,066 --> 00:03:55,527
It's some of Richard's hair!
55
00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:57,237
What do I do with this?
56
00:03:57,404 --> 00:04:00,407
Getting it away from me
would be job one.
57
00:04:01,533 --> 00:04:04,661
It's weird, but I don't want
to throw this away.
58
00:04:04,828 --> 00:04:06,872
This is all I have left of him.
59
00:04:07,038 --> 00:04:08,623
Gross...
60
00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:10,625
Drain hair.
61
00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:22,262
Cool! Oh, it looks like a tiny
little person drowning in your cereal.
62
00:04:24,765 --> 00:04:27,809
- God, what is wrong with me?
- You need to get some sleep.
63
00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:29,311
I need to get some Richard.
64
00:04:32,856 --> 00:04:35,066
You broke up with him for a reason.
65
00:04:35,233 --> 00:04:39,237
I know. I know.
I'm just so tired of missing him.
66
00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:42,532
Tired of wondering why he
hasn't called. Why hasn't he?
67
00:04:42,699 --> 00:04:44,826
Maybe because you told him not to?
68
00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:47,913
What are you, the memory woman?
69
00:04:49,706 --> 00:04:51,917
They're not breaking up!
Chandler and Janice?
70
00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:54,586
They're not breaking up!
He didn't blink!
71
00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:58,507
I'm not surprised.
Have you seen them together?
72
00:04:58,673 --> 00:04:59,966
They're really cute.
73
00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:03,094
"Cute"? This is Janice!
74
00:05:03,345 --> 00:05:04,596
You remember Janice?
75
00:05:04,763 --> 00:05:07,265
Yes, I remember. She's annoying.
But you know what?
76
00:05:07,432 --> 00:05:10,185
She's his girlfriend now.
I mean, what can we do?
77
00:05:10,352 --> 00:05:14,022
There you go! That's the spirit
I'm looking for! "What can we do?"
78
00:05:14,773 --> 00:05:15,857
Huh?
79
00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:18,568
All right, who's first, huh? Ross?
80
00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:21,404
Chandler's our friend,
and Janice makes him happy.
81
00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:24,366
So I say we be adult about it
and accept her.
82
00:05:48,765 --> 00:05:49,933
Honey...
83
00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:52,435
- I was wondering...
- Mm.
84
00:05:52,602 --> 00:05:56,439
Do you still have
that, um, Navy uniform?
85
00:05:57,858 --> 00:06:00,610
No, I had to return it
to the costume place.
86
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,197
I think I have an old band uniform
from high school.
87
00:06:05,115 --> 00:06:07,325
You remember not having sex
in high school, right?
88
00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:14,624
Well, honey, what about you?
89
00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:15,876
- What?
- I mean...
90
00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:22,299
Do you have any fun, you know,
fantasy-type things?
91
00:06:26,303 --> 00:06:28,179
Come on. You gotta have one.
92
00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:30,181
Nope.
93
00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:32,851
- Ross, you know what?
- What?
94
00:06:33,018 --> 00:06:36,730
If you tell me, I might do it.
95
00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:46,156
Okay.
96
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:48,074
-Ahem.
97
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:52,162
Did you ever see, um,
return of the jedi?
98
00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:03,840
Do you remember the scene...
99
00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:07,677
With, um, jabba the hutt?
100
00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:13,516
Jabba had as his prisoner...
101
00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:14,893
Princess Leia.
102
00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:20,857
Princess Leia was wearing...
103
00:07:21,024 --> 00:07:25,695
This, um, gold bikini thing.
104
00:07:27,989 --> 00:07:30,033
It was pretty cool.
105
00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:36,706
Yeah, Princess Leia and the gold bikini?
Oh, every guy our age loved that.
106
00:07:38,708 --> 00:07:40,335
- Really?
- Mm-hm. Mm.
107
00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:44,422
It's huge! That's the moment when
she stopped being a Princess...
108
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:47,425
And she became, like, you know,
a woman.
109
00:07:49,219 --> 00:07:52,222
Did you ever do the Leia thing?
110
00:07:52,389 --> 00:07:53,974
Oh, yeah. Mm-hm.
111
00:07:57,560 --> 00:08:00,271
Really? That great, huh?
112
00:08:00,438 --> 00:08:03,775
No, it's just that I got this new
pager, and I have it on "vibrate."
113
00:08:08,905 --> 00:08:10,490
See you.
114
00:08:10,657 --> 00:08:11,741
Hey.
115
00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:12,993
Rachel: Hi, you guys!
116
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:15,745
Look who I found standing
outside the szechuan dragon...
117
00:08:15,912 --> 00:08:18,623
Staring at a parking meter.
118
00:08:18,790 --> 00:08:23,086
- Ahem. Mon. Hi.
- Hi.
119
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:26,464
- Why aren't you at work?
- Oh, they sent me home.
120
00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:28,133
Why?
121
00:08:28,299 --> 00:08:31,177
Because I don't work
at the szechuan dragon.
122
00:08:31,386 --> 00:08:33,513
Rachel:
You really need to get some sleep.
123
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:34,848
I know I do.
124
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,474
-Hi.
125
00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:38,518
Guess what?
They published my paper.
126
00:08:38,685 --> 00:08:41,855
- Oh! Really? Let me see, let me see.
- —uh—huh.
127
00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:43,231
Rach, look!
128
00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:44,566
- Rachel: No.
- Ooh.
129
00:08:44,733 --> 00:08:46,317
Hi. Ha, ha.
130
00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:49,237
Ha, ha! Oh.
131
00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:52,032
Where is my strong Ross Skywalker
to come rescue me?
132
00:08:58,455 --> 00:08:59,581
There he is!
133
00:09:04,335 --> 00:09:05,587
- Hey.
- Wheel!
134
00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:08,089
_of_l -fortune!
135
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:10,592
This guy's so stupid.
136
00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:12,260
It's count rushmore!
137
00:09:16,473 --> 00:09:18,475
You should really go on this show.
138
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:24,022
I got three tickets to
the rangers tonight. What do you say?
139
00:09:24,189 --> 00:09:26,232
I say I am there!
140
00:09:26,399 --> 00:09:28,109
Cool! Oh.
141
00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:29,360
Is Ross going too?
142
00:09:29,527 --> 00:09:30,904
No. Janice.
143
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:33,114
Janice?
144
00:09:33,865 --> 00:09:37,243
Because I just feel bad for Ross,
you know?
145
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:42,165
We always go together. We're like
the three hockey-teers, you know?
146
00:09:42,665 --> 00:09:47,212
I may be way out on a limb here,
but do you have a problem with Janice?
147
00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:54,177
Oh, god, how do I say this? Uh...
148
00:09:55,011 --> 00:09:57,097
Oh! Ah!
149
00:09:57,555 --> 00:10:00,141
You know that girl from the
restaurant with the hair?
150
00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:03,353
Ooh! That girl that I hate?
Ugh! She drives me crazy. Ew.
151
00:10:05,522 --> 00:10:09,776
Look, I don't hate Janice.
She's just a lot to take, you know?
152
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:14,739
- Well, there you go.
- Oh.
153
00:10:14,948 --> 00:10:16,699
Don't look at me like that.
154
00:10:16,866 --> 00:10:19,327
She drove you nuts before too,
remember?
155
00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:22,622
I'm crazy about her now.
This could be the real thing.
156
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:24,874
Capital r, capital t!
157
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:29,712
Don't worry, those are
the right letters.
158
00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:33,633
Look, what do you want me to say?
159
00:10:34,425 --> 00:10:36,219
I want you to say that you like her!
160
00:10:36,386 --> 00:10:39,347
I can't. It's like this chemical thing,
you know?
161
00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:42,475
Every time she starts laughing,
I just wanna...
162
00:10:45,019 --> 00:10:48,398
Pull my arm off so
I have something to throw at her.
163
00:10:50,692 --> 00:10:51,776
Thanks for trying.
164
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:57,490
Oh, and by the way,
there is no count rushmore!
165
00:10:57,991 --> 00:11:00,910
Then who's the guy that painted
the faces on the mountain?
166
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:08,418
- Ugh.
- How could you tell her?
167
00:11:08,585 --> 00:11:11,462
I didn't think
it would be that big a deal!
168
00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:13,506
Oh. She didn't think
it would be a big deal!
169
00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:15,967
Who are you talking to
when you do that?
170
00:11:17,260 --> 00:11:21,598
Look, that was supposed to be
a private, personal thing between us.
171
00:11:21,764 --> 00:11:26,019
Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay?
We tell each other everything.
172
00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:28,021
Guys do the same thing.
173
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:31,107
I mean, what about all that
locker-room stuff?
174
00:11:31,274 --> 00:11:34,152
That's different.
That's like, uh, who dated a stripper?
175
00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:37,822
Or who did it on the back
of the staten island ferry?
176
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:39,818
- Both of those Joey?
- Yeah.
177
00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:44,537
But you don't talk about
your girlfriend...
178
00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:47,916
And the intimate stuff
you do with her.
179
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:50,793
- Not even with your best friend?
- No.
180
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:52,045
That is so sad.
181
00:11:53,671 --> 00:11:56,132
You're missing out on so much.
182
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:59,052
I mean, the bonding and the sharing...
183
00:11:59,302 --> 00:12:02,972
And knowing they're going through
the same thing you are.
184
00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:07,644
Oh. So, what, you tell each
other everything?
185
00:12:08,478 --> 00:12:09,562
Pretty much.
186
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:16,027
Did you talk about
the night of five times?
187
00:12:19,239 --> 00:12:22,158
Do you tell people about
the night of five times?
188
00:12:22,325 --> 00:12:24,661
Uh, honey, that was with Carol.
189
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:28,081
I know, but it's still worth
mentioning, I think.
190
00:12:29,707 --> 00:12:33,211
Relax every muscle in your body.
191
00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:39,175
Listen to the plinky-plunky music.
192
00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:42,845
Okay, now close your eyes...
193
00:12:43,012 --> 00:12:46,015
And think of a happy place.
194
00:12:46,391 --> 00:12:48,059
Tell me your happy place.
195
00:12:48,226 --> 00:12:50,687
Richard's living room, drinking wine.
196
00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:56,067
No, no, no. Not a Richard thing.
Just put down the glass and get out.
197
00:12:56,693 --> 00:12:59,195
I'm sorry, but that's my happy place.
198
00:12:59,362 --> 00:13:04,200
Okay, fine. Use my happy place.
Just don't move anything in there.
199
00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:06,619
I'll try not to.
200
00:13:06,786 --> 00:13:10,873
Okay. All right, so,
you're in a Meadow...
201
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,918
Millions of stars in the sky...
202
00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:16,129
You think breaking up was a mistake?
203
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:18,715
There are no questions
in the happy place.
204
00:13:19,882 --> 00:13:26,389
Just the warm breeze and the
moonlight flowing through the trees.
205
00:13:26,556 --> 00:13:28,891
I'll bet he's over me.
I'll bet he's fine.
206
00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:32,770
Betting and wagering of any kind
are not permitted in the happy place.
207
00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:34,230
Okay?
208
00:13:34,397 --> 00:13:37,900
There's just, you know,
the lovely waterfalls...
209
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:40,611
And the trickling fountains...
210
00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:45,742
And the calming sounds
of the babbling brook.
211
00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:47,744
- Okay, this isn't working.
- Oh.
212
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:49,454
I'm still awake,
and now I have to pee.
213
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:53,124
So I hear...
214
00:13:53,291 --> 00:13:54,709
You hate me!
215
00:13:55,918 --> 00:14:00,423
I, uh, never said hate.
I was very careful about that.
216
00:14:00,590 --> 00:14:05,845
A little birdie told me you wanting to
rip your arm off and throw it at me.
217
00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:11,559
And you got "hate" from that?
You're taking a big leap there, I, uh...
218
00:14:11,726 --> 00:14:13,603
All right, fine, fine, fine!
219
00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:17,607
We have got to do something about
our little situation here.
220
00:14:17,774 --> 00:14:19,400
So this is my idea.
221
00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:23,488
You and me spending
some quality time together.
222
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:26,032
But what does that...?
223
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:27,617
For Chandler!
224
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:30,578
Okay. I'm in.
225
00:14:30,745 --> 00:14:36,751
Okay! This is what we'll call it:
Joey and Janice's day of fun!
226
00:14:37,627 --> 00:14:39,003
Does it have to be a day?
227
00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:43,633
Yes, because that's how long
it takes to love me.
228
00:14:44,175 --> 00:14:48,304
Yeah, I know. Ha.
I sleep in the next room.
229
00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:54,560
I went down to the post office...
230
00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:57,647
And it turns out it was
those videos that I ordered...
231
00:14:57,814 --> 00:15:00,817
For Richard about the civil war.
232
00:15:00,983 --> 00:15:03,111
He loved the civil war.
233
00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:07,740
Do you want us to take you home?
234
00:15:11,369 --> 00:15:13,996
Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away.
235
00:15:22,338 --> 00:15:25,174
Women tell each other everything.
Did you know that?
236
00:15:25,341 --> 00:15:27,510
Ha, ha. Yeah.
237
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:30,513
No, Chandler, everything.
238
00:15:31,514 --> 00:15:34,267
Like stuff you like. Stuff she likes.
239
00:15:34,434 --> 00:15:37,854
Technique. Stamina. Girth.
240
00:15:41,566 --> 00:15:43,192
Why? Why? Why?
241
00:15:43,359 --> 00:15:45,403
Why would they do this?
242
00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:49,907
Rachel says sharing's great
and supposedly...
243
00:15:50,074 --> 00:15:52,577
We ought to be doing it.
244
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:55,955
Uh, do you want to?
245
00:15:57,582 --> 00:16:00,042
- We're not gonna talk about girth?
- No.
246
00:16:00,877 --> 00:16:02,420
- Yeah. Okay. Yeah.
- Yeah?
247
00:16:02,587 --> 00:16:04,714
All right, you go first.
248
00:16:04,881 --> 00:16:07,633
- Okay. Okay, I'll go first.
- Okay.
249
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:09,886
So, uh, the other night...
250
00:16:10,052 --> 00:16:13,639
Rachel and I are in bed
talking about fantasies...
251
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:17,810
And I happened to describe
a particular...
252
00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:19,896
Star wars thing...
253
00:16:20,062 --> 00:16:22,273
- Princess Leia and the gold bikini.
- Yes.
254
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:24,525
- I know!
- Yes.
255
00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:29,464
- Well, that was easy. Ha, ha.
- Ha, ha.
256
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:30,656
Okay, you go.
257
00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:31,908
- Okay.
- Okay.
258
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:35,453
Okay, you know when you're
in bed with a woman...
259
00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:40,249
And, uh, ahem, you know,
you're fooling around...
260
00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:43,211
And you get all these
mental images in your brain?
261
00:16:43,419 --> 00:16:46,672
Like Elle MacPherson
or the girl at the xerox place?
262
00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:49,550
- With the bellybutton ring? Oh.
- Oh! I know.
263
00:16:49,717 --> 00:16:52,303
And then all of a sudden,
your mom pops into your head.
264
00:16:54,055 --> 00:16:57,725
And you're, like,
"mom, get out of here!"
265
00:16:57,975 --> 00:17:00,603
But after that,
you can't think of anything else.
266
00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:06,067
And you can't stop what you're doing.
So it's kind of like you're...
267
00:17:06,442 --> 00:17:08,861
You know, you know...
268
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:11,030
You don't know!
269
00:17:12,573 --> 00:17:14,450
Your mom?
270
00:17:14,659 --> 00:17:18,204
You're telling me about your mom?
What's the matter with you?
271
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:22,124
- You said...
- I said "share," not "scare"!
272
00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:24,377
Go sit over there!
273
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:32,218
We're back! Joey: Hey.
274
00:17:33,261 --> 00:17:35,179
What are you guys doing together?
275
00:17:35,346 --> 00:17:38,307
Joey and Janice's day of fun!
276
00:17:41,102 --> 00:17:42,520
Really? Joey: Yeah, yeah.
277
00:17:42,687 --> 00:17:45,022
We went to a mets game.
We got Chinese food.
278
00:17:45,189 --> 00:17:48,234
And, uh, you know,
I love this woman. Ha-ha-ha.
279
00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,279
You have got competition, buddy.
280
00:17:52,697 --> 00:17:56,200
Well, I just came by
to give you a kiss.
281
00:17:56,367 --> 00:17:57,618
Both: Mwah.
282
00:17:57,827 --> 00:18:02,999
I have to go pick up the baby.
So I'll see you later, sweetheart.
283
00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:04,375
You too, Chandler.
284
00:18:13,175 --> 00:18:18,431
- You still can't stand her, can you?
- I'm sorry, man. I tried! I really did!
285
00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:22,602
I appreciate you giving it a shot.
286
00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:25,104
But you know, the good thing...
287
00:18:25,271 --> 00:18:28,733
Is that we spent the whole day
together and I survived.
288
00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:32,153
And what's even more amazing,
so did she. Ha, ha.
289
00:18:32,320 --> 00:18:34,280
It was bat day at shea stadium.
290
00:18:36,449 --> 00:18:37,658
I guess that's something.
291
00:18:37,825 --> 00:18:39,660
Oh, man, that's huge!
292
00:18:39,827 --> 00:18:43,247
Now I know I can stand to be
around her. Which means...
293
00:18:43,414 --> 00:18:45,124
I get to hang out with you.
294
00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:48,169
Which is kind of
the whole point anyway. Ha, ha.
295
00:18:48,794 --> 00:18:50,880
Okay.
296
00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:57,553
Oh, hey! We, uh, stopped by
the coffee shop and, uh, ran into Ross.
297
00:19:02,099 --> 00:19:04,352
Oh, god.
298
00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,104
If it makes you feel any better,
I do it too.
299
00:19:08,189 --> 00:19:09,815
Oh.
300
00:19:09,982 --> 00:19:11,901
- Really?
- Oh, yeah!
301
00:19:12,068 --> 00:19:14,570
I always picture your mom
when I'm having sex.
302
00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:22,078
Man: April 12, 1861.
303
00:19:26,082 --> 00:19:28,876
The United States Garrison
at fort sumter was fired upon.
304
00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:32,254
It is now under bombardment by...
305
00:19:43,891 --> 00:19:45,393
Dad, what are you doing here?
306
00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:49,689
It's your mother's bridge night, so I
came into the city for a moni-cuddle.
307
00:19:53,943 --> 00:19:56,362
Since when did you start
smoking cigars?
308
00:19:57,321 --> 00:20:01,283
I don't.
I just like the smell of them.
309
00:20:01,742 --> 00:20:04,829
So, uh,
what are you really doing here?
310
00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:07,206
I just wanted to make sure
you're okay.
311
00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:10,626
Why wouldn't I be okay?
312
00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:12,211
I saw Richard.
313
00:20:13,629 --> 00:20:15,172
Oh?
314
00:20:15,464 --> 00:20:17,216
So how you doing?
315
00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:18,801
I'm fine.
316
00:20:18,968 --> 00:20:22,096
I'm just a little tired,
but I'm okay.
317
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:25,099
- Ahem. How's Richard doing?
- You don't want to know.
318
00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:28,018
No, I really, really do.
319
00:20:28,185 --> 00:20:30,813
Well, he's doing terrible!
320
00:20:33,023 --> 00:20:34,567
Really?
321
00:20:35,192 --> 00:20:37,486
Worse than when he broke up
with Barbara.
322
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:43,200
- You're not just saying that, are you?
- No, the man is a mess!
323
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:46,662
- Was he crying?
- No.
324
00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:50,541
Do you think he was waiting till
after you left, so he could cry?
325
00:20:50,708 --> 00:20:52,418
Maybe.
326
00:20:55,713 --> 00:20:58,924
Honey, relationships are hard.
Like with your mom and me.
327
00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:02,928
You know, after we graduated from
college, we broke up for a while.
328
00:21:03,095 --> 00:21:05,639
It seems her father,
your grandfather...
329
00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:08,434
Wanted her to travel around Europe
like he did.
330
00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:11,353
Of course, he got to do it
on uncle Sam's nickel...
331
00:21:11,520 --> 00:21:15,775
Because he was also strafing
German troop trains at the time.
332
00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:17,026
However...
333
00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:00,611
Okay, here we go.
334
00:22:00,778 --> 00:22:03,948
I am jabba's prisoner.
And you...
335
00:22:04,615 --> 00:22:07,117
Have a really weird look
on your face.
336
00:22:07,284 --> 00:22:08,744
What? Honey, what is it?
337
00:22:08,911 --> 00:22:10,412
Did I get the hair wrong?
338
00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:13,040
Or what? Did you just
picture it differently? What?
339
00:22:13,249 --> 00:22:17,044
No, no. It's, um...
It's not you. It's, um...
340
00:22:21,882 --> 00:22:26,053
What is it? Come on, sweetie.
You're, like, freaking me out here.
341
00:22:28,514 --> 00:22:31,308
I hate Chandler.
The bastard ruined my life!
24240
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