All language subtitles for RuPauls.Drag.Race.Down.Under.S02E02.WEB-DL.1080p-FN.en

RUPAUL: Previously on
RuPaul's Drag Race Down Under.

RUPAUL: G'day, G'day, G'day!

[queens hollering]

You need to create a custom couture look

from the House of Mother Nature.

[laughing]

[singing off key]

RUPAUL: Spankie Jackzon.

Just wearing panties?

Not sure the best choice.

RUPAUL: Faux Fur.

It's not a bad idea.

It was just ruined by
those granny panties.

RUPAUL: Molly Poppinz.

Congratulations. You are the
winner of this week's challenge.

Spankie Jackzon Shantay, you stay.

Faux Fur. Sashay away.

[upbeat music]

My toes. My toes.

Nothing says you're at RuPaul's Drag Race

like watching someone go home.

But now we are firmly rooted.

In reality...

"Sisters Forever, the lood-."

QUEEN 1: The loud.

QUEEN 2: What the fuck?

What does that say?

I don't think we can say that word.

QUEEN 3: That's a naughty word.

QUEEN 4: [indistinct].

- QUEEN 1: Is it?
- QUEEN 5: [indistinct].

The [indistinct].

[queens screaming]

It was hard sending Faux home.

It's not something that
anybody wants to do.

QUEEN 3: It's gonna be
quiet around here without her.

Fuck.

- It's quiet already.
- I know.

The sound of her voice
absolutely got on my tits.

But there's a beautiful person in there.

And I got to see it.

You know what we need?

We need another design challenge
with a box full of rubbish

- so she can pop back out.
- [laughter]

I don't want to be in the bottom again.

Nobody wants to be there.

You did it -QUEEN 4: I did it.

You did it. I was excited.

Well, we did it.

We've both been doing
drag for a long time.

We've both been successful.

- You didn't [indistinct]?
- QUEEN 4: No.

You gave it to them.
And I think that was it.

And we know that at any
time we could go home.

We're not here going,

"Oh, when I win the $50.000."

Honestly, my heart was about
to fall through my asshole.

I'm gonna get that 50K.

The most hideous thing, and
I never want to see

a plastic tube again in my life.

And I'm gonna make it to the end.

You haven't seen Spankie's full potential?

I don't know. But I'm fuckin'
winning. I'm winning.

And the girls should be worried

'cause I'm gonna come up from behind.

I'm gonna cut your
wigs while you're sleeping.

Ugh!

And then I'm gonna take the crown.

RUPAUL: The winner of
RuPaul's Drag Race Down Under

will receive a year's supply of cosmetics

from Anastasia Beverly Hills

and a cash prize of $50.000,

courtesy of our mate at Samsung.

Tonight, with Michelle
Visage, Rhys Nicholson,

and our extra special
guest judge, Lucy Lawless.

♪ RuPaul Drag Race ♪

♪ May the best drag queen win ♪

♪ Best drag queen win ♪

[all hollering]

QUEEN 4: So, I was in
the bottom three last week.

I'm feeling relieved to be here.

I know whatever challenge
happens to us this week,

I'm gonna make sure I push
my ass and step my pussy up.

How are we feeling, bitches?

I'm ready to show you
what I'm actually made of.

So...

I was so close. So, fucking close.

Yuri was also very close.

Like that outfit was supreme.

- Stunning.
- Thank you. You know...

Just a shame you couldn't walk in it.

I'm ready to fucking win something.

[laughter]

QUEEN: I'm feeling pretty good.

Like I was happy with
being safe last week.

Yes. You sewed an outfit,

and I don't think I explained
myself very well.

Oh, okay.

We're gonna talk about this, are we?

If I'm completely honest,
I thought it was helpful,

you know, for me personally.

Yeah. You thought mine was
ill-fi ttingas well,

and I felt you didn't like that.

I was upset by your comment.

Yes, that's right.

- And I felt like you were.
- Yeah.

And when you get upset,
I feel like you felt attacked.

I think the delivery was
just a bit hard, like,

just a bit. Um.

It came across as like you
were reading her for her outfit.

I just got offended
because I'd worked hard

and that's a natural
response. For people...

- QUEEN 5: Yes.
- Can I just say...

My apology.

For me it didn't even
seem like that big of a deal.

Yeah, it's all good.

I guess it's fine.

And I'm glad that we talked about it.

[siren blaring]

- Whoo!
- Whoa!

RUPUAL: Girl, she done already
done had herses.

- Hey, ladykins.
- QUEENS: Hey.

Down Under's next Drag Superstar

should have an arresting personality,

be able to complete a full sentence,

and always be on the lookout
for her breakout role

because if you're good to Mama Ru,

Mama Ru is good to you.

Acting! Yes!

G'day. G'day. G'day.

Hey.

Hello.

Good morning.

My queens, condragulations
for surviving your first week

of RuPaul's Drag Race Down Under.

QUEENS: Yay!

RUPAUL: Yeah!

And a special shout out to last
week's main challenge winner,

Molly Poppinz.

ALL: Yay!

Yes, Molly.

Ooh, she poppin' off, y'all.

Today, I want to give Molly a chance

to rate her competition.

- Oh!
- Okay.

I hate confrontation, but
here we at Drag Race.

And it's gonna happen.

Oh, Pit Crew.

Oh!

Ladies, welcome to
the "All Tea No Shade Pageant."

QUEENS: Oh!

Now there are four sashes and nine queens.

Now Molly gets to decide

which four queens deserve
their own unique title.

Tits and hips forward and smile.

MOLLY: So, I'm gonna just
play this to my advantage.

All right, Molly.

First category is the GC.

GC, good cunt.

Which queen do you think
is your biggest competition?

Greatest competition,

I thought it literally was good cunt.

Yuri Guaii.

[all cheering]

Hello?

Stunning. Lovely.

Bitch!

Give us the pageant wave.

Yes.

Next category is Daggy Drag.

Which queen has
the most questionable fashion?

Love you all.

But I'm sorry, Spankie.

Love you, Spanks.

Oh, I mean.

Yeah.

Thank you.

It's still an award.

Oh, my God.

Thank you so much.

Next category is.

You Beauty.

Now, which of these queens

out of Drag do you think is
a bit of all right?

Kween Kong, like, duh?

I'm not surprised because obviously

I'm a big brown chocolate bar,
you know, clearly.

Oh. Thank you.

QUEENS: Oh!

[laughter]

Oh, my heart.

Final category is.

Taking the Piss.

Which queen do you think
is the next to go home?

[queens exclaiming]

Oh, this is a hard one.

Y'all are gonna hate me.

I see little Miss Aubrey.

And I'm like, she's already got
too much shit going on right now

with Miss Cooper.

And then I look at Miss Cooper

and...

Sorry, but I'm gonna have to give it...

I don't want her coming for me next

to Bev.

QUEENS: Oh!

If I was to honestly choose, it
would have been probably Minnie.

I'm sorry. You were just
a bit safe last week.

Oh.

You know what, come over here, darling.

Bye Bev!

[laughter]

RUPAUL: Well, ladies,
if you have any issues

with the pageant results,

you can take them up with Molly.

[laughter]

Now, for this week's Maxi Challenge,

we're putting your
acting skills to the test

in the gritty prison drama Caged Queens.

#DragRaceDownUnder.

Now you'll be working in two teams.

Those who received a sash
will be team number one.

Oh!

- Okay.
- Okay.

And those who didn't
will be team number two.

QUEEN 3: Ooh!

And, Molly, you'll be joining
the team with the sashes.

[queens cheering]

Molly, you in danger, girl.

[laughter]

QUEEN 7: Okay, fine.

I kind of threw a couple of
these bitches under the bus.

Let's see how we go.

Racers, start your engines and
may the best drag queen win.

Hey, can you believe it?

First acting challenge.

Acting challenge. I'm ready to party!

- All right!
- Team Sash, are we ready?

Come on, Cage Queens.

QUEEN 1: I am frothing.

This is somewhere that I kind of

sit a little bit more comfortable in...

So, first things first.

Do we need to talk about
any of the pageantry?

I have some questions.

Do you think that I'm gonna go home today?

Absolutely not.

I wanted to give it to Minnie.

Girl, if you gave it to Minnie Cooper,

I would have had to protect you.

Exactly.

She's Minnie fucking Cooper, and
she seriously stapled

like an outfit together.

No, no, no. This is Drag Race.

That's not gonna cut it.

And she's already tired.

And now because of it,

Minnie and Aubs are on
the same team, so...

Sorry about that.

Do respect Minnie 'cause she's older.

You know. We wouldn't be here if
it wasn't for a queen like that.

So, like, let's remember
that before you like, you know,

throw her under the bus.

I do see the younger queens, you know,

isolating Minnie a little bit.

And I think part of that is
because she is a threat.

She has a lot of experience.

So, yeah.

We'll see. It's dynamics.

You guys are good to work?

Well, we'll soon find out.

[laughter]

No, we're professionals.

We know what we're doing.

Ooh! The drama.
But honestly, this is my forte.

I've studied acting, did my three years.

Save the drama for the screen.

Yeah.

We've got all the actresses in our group.

Minnie has done theater.

Aubrey does theater.

Pomara is Pomara.

And I have done Galadriel
in the Lord of the Rings

production at school.

I am dyslexic, so if you
don't mind reading aloud.

So, when I read something first up,

- it takes me a while to get it.
- Absolutely, Coop.

I am an actor, but I am dyslexic

and you need to say it out loud.

So, you hear it orally.

[laughter]

And I've learned to deal with it.

I deal with it very well.

Voice over, "A beautiful,
brutal, but... bodacious."

QUEEN 4: Maybe you're
not the best one to read.

- Shut the fuck up.
- [laughter]

So, we've got Chantelle,
a prissy, freckled,

vain kleptomaniac pop star,

who is far too delicate to be in prison.

Oh, my God. It's like it's made for me.

Chiquita, a tough as nails prison guard.

Deidre a savvy businesswoman.

And last but not least,

Dezerie, a cunning queen
with a love of booze.

I'm happy to play anything.

As am I.

There's no I in the team.

- Fuck yeah!
- But there is me.

QUEEN 5: Spell it. Tea me.

Well, I'm dyslexic, so
that's quite possible.

I tell you what, for a pack of ciggies,

I'll whiten your teeth, and
I'll throw in an anal bleach in.

Oh, I bet you will.

So, acting does make me a bit
nervous because it's...

You have to be loud.
You have to, you know,

be stupid.

And I do struggle with it.

How do you keep your lips so plump?

Hold on, maybe she's not my
biggest competition right now.

Maybe I gave the sash to the wrong person.

[sobbing]

I can see that these girls don't
have any idea of like

reading the script and
any of like the jokes.

And they are completely missing the mark.

Just on that line there

because, like, I feel like we
need to pause after your thing

to think about it a little bit and...

I think.

And I feel like that will give
it sort of a bit more comedy.

It's like, uh...

There is going to be a problem.

Yeah, yeah.

And I'll bring it up with you.

I'm just gonna do me, boo.

Do you, boo.

You do you.

Eee! Eeeeeeee!

Hello. Hi, Aubrey.

Hi, Pomara.

Hi. I love the way you say my name.

Seeing them both there, I'm, like,

suddenly a bit nervous.

MICHELLE: Okay, so get in places.

It's intimidating to be standing

on this green screen
looking at Rhys and Michelle.

And action!

Oh, what the hell?

How did a beautiful pop star like me...

Chantelle Chantelllleeeee Minogue.

I feel my nerves like building up.

Chantelle Minogue

end up in a place like this.

Remember, Chantal, you are this
pop star, and you are in prison.

You're a Minogue.

One of the upper echelon Minogues.

Make bigger choices.

And I think just hit... hit
everything a little bit harder.

G'day. G'day. G'day.

Oh, what's your job here, Chickie?

Next time you call me Chickie
will be the last time.

Okay, let's cut there.

And you're gonna say, "Next
time you call me Chickie

will be your last."

Action!

The next time you call me
Chickie will be your last.

Okay, cool.

Um. Uh-uh.

Okay, cool.

Now squat.

[evil laughter]

I think we've got it in the bag.

I think we're good.

- Hello.
- Hello.

- How's it going?
- Hi, Hannah.

Wow.

Who's playing who?

- So, I'm Deidre.
- MICHELLE: Okay.

And I'm Dezerie.

We'll show you what we've come up with,

and then you can say if you hate or not.

Yeah, well, I'm very good at that.

And action.

Oh, Dezerie. Thank God you're here.

No, that's Deirdre.

Oh, yeah. These two.
This happened all day.

Action.

- Oh.
- Oh, fuck.

[laughter]

RHYS: Action.

Oh, Deirdre.

Thank God you're here.

Honestly, I've been rushed off my feet.

Oh!

You need some of my new product.

Oh, my God.

[laughter]

So, it was so entertaining.

It's like a 150%.

MICHELLE: Yes.

We love where you're going with this.

[clinks]

Michelle and Rhys were laughing.

So, I think Hannah and
I are doing really great.

Now we're gonna do it with the rocks.

Just keep crawling.

Keep going. Breaking free.

Okay, cue.

Wait.

We're really happy with this.

And grab hands and bow, up, bow.

Get really close. Run,
run, run, run, run, run, run!

Spankie, Yuri, welcome.

MICHELLE: Here we go. And action!

Oh, whoops.

I dropped something.

Oh. Oh.

Anoushka, thanks for squeezing me in.

It's... it's my pleasure.

That... the sexuality should be tense.

You can see how you're dressed.

- That you are easy.
- Yeah.

- Play it a little straighter.
- QUEEN 8: Okay.

So to speak.

So, Spankie, are we Russian?
Or are we not?

I... vodka.

I keep telling myself vodka.

Can you do Russian accent?

It's a little more [indistinct].

QUEEN 6: I'm trying.

MICHELLE: And action.

The only thing I know is that
if she crosses me or you,

I'll slit her throat while she sleeps.

So sorry for everyone
who has to watch this.

Uh.

Cue.

Big Bev, I am so sorry I'm late.

I don't like waiting on bitches, bitch.

Bitch.

- Cut.
- Cut.

You're really dumb.

You're ditzy. QUEEN 1: Okay. Got you.

[laughs]

- Do you know what I mean?
- Gotcha.

All right. [Clears throat]

Action.

Where is it?

- Oh.
- Oh.

I almost forgot.

Here it is.

Kween, I want you to play even ditsier.

QUEEN 1: Okay.

- Okay.
- RHYS: Action.

What are we doing with this pavlova again?

When Veggie serves her last meal.

She'll find this.

File.

I don't get it.

But you're the boss, applesauce.

Mm-hmm.

[upbeat music]

I am in both scripts.

There's a file in it.

I got it. I think I'll be...
I think I'll be fine.

Action.

Here's your final meal
before we flip the switch.

How about something salty?

Keep those nuts away from my face.

Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut.

So those glasses are horrible.

You want to run those lines one more time?

Oh, that was a funny line.

No words.

No words. Just...

- Execute her!
- Execute her!

Hold on. Cut.

We aren't really that
familiar with each other.

We haven't really had any play together.

Hello?

You don't say.

You don't say?

I forgot if this electric chair thingy

- even works.
- Not even close.

Oh, that's so good.

I think it's rocky.

The overhead light! Well, fuck me.

You know, I'm a little bit worried.

Here's the switch. [Screaming]

Okay.

[upbeat music]

- Hey.
- Hey!

Come on. It's got a stiffy!

Oh, Jesus Christ

[laughter]

Hi, Team 1.

Hi, Team 2.

You'll find that it's great Group W-O-N.

Group Won.

Oh!

I think we did really well.

I'm very confident with our team.

Anyone worried?

I had a bit of fumbles at the
start and then once I got into,

I was on fire.

Minnie and Aubrey have
now settled everything,

so it's cool.

It's calm and we're collected.

[cheering]

Well, I ate Minnie's ass.

So, I think we're fine now.

I just want to say something to you guys

'cause I have dyslexia,
I don't share that very often.

And normally, I know...

Oh, yes, you're funny, Pomara?

No.

You say you don't share often.

I was like, "I've heard
you say it like six times."

"Yeah, but you were
in my group." No, I know.

Give me strength.

Pomara, that's... Sorry.

For someone with a disability,
that's super offensive.

I can see that this was just
a really terribly timed joke.

It wasn't about the disability.

- No.
- But it is a disability.

No.

My joke was that I've heard
her mention it so many times.

That was it.

That was the harmless joke.

I would never about that.

You were laughing about... you saying...

I hear you. I hear you. I hear you.

You don't tell anyone the way

you've told us a couple times.

Yeah, but I'm telling these guys.

[indistinct chatter]

Sorry, I told those
guys and I didn't tell you.

I've known her for eight years

and I've never seen
her be so loud in my life.

Apologize and say it was inappropriate.

Oh, I'm very sorry, Minnie.

It was inappropriate.

- Thank you.
- I appreciate that.

So, we have a runway to do.

Who is feeling excited
to stomp down that runway?

[queens cheering]

In that case, fuck off,
and let's go get ready.

[queens cheering]

Oh, my God.

[upbeat music]

Are you feeling confident
about how you did, Minnie?

Um.

Uh... look, I'm always my worst critic.

I'm literally... I'm totally the same.

- Yeah.
- I will critique myself

- under the bus.
- Yeah.

Sometimes it's like... it's
part of my magic,

but it's also something
that can really derail me.

Yeah, I would like to do
better than I did last week.

I really would.

I don't know. I really don't know.

I work with kids,

but I teach them about,
like, living their dreams

and being themselves and...

Nope.

I just... yeah, I don't
want to let them down.

So, Yuri, tell me about your family.

Are your family supportive?

Um, I grew up in a super religious family.

When I was like 15,
they asked me, you know,

if I was gay and stuff.

And they pretty much said, "If
you are, we can get you help."

QUEEN 5: Oh, wow.

And I was like, "Oh, no, I'm not."

"I'm not gay" and everything.

And I was really close to my family.

- QUEEN 8: Yeah.
- But pulled back.

And I stopped gonna Christmas.

I stopped like everything.

- QUEEN 8: Wow.
- Yeah.

And then when they
found out I did Drag, it was...

"Just so you know, we'll never support you

and what you do.

"Just don't tell your
father." That is really sad.

It's shit..

- Yeah.
- It really is.

And there's so many young kids out there

that just don't,

unfortunately, their parents
just can't understand...

- Yeah.
- What we do.

They just don't.

So, you know, don't ever think
that that makes you not worthy

or less than or that you're not loved.

But like, I'm trying... I'm trying.

I don't know. I don't know.

- I don't know what to do.
- You don't have to try.

You don't.

You are enough

it's like... Oh, fuck, babe.

Honestly, you are welcome
in my family anytime.

There is always a bed,

there is always a seat at the table.

- Thank you.
- So, you are not alone.

I've only ever met Spankie
like once or twice before this.

And she's like this amazing person.

And being surrounded by people

that care and listen
is really, really nice.

And it makes me so happy.

- Love you.
- You're so... you're so welcome.

I mean it from the bottom of my heart.

If you could stop crying,

because you need to paint your face.

I know. And I take so long.

[laughter]

Ahh!

Not me brush.

♪ Cover girl Put the bass in your walk ♪

♪ Head to toe, let your whole body talk ♪

Welcome to the main stage of
RuPaul's Drag Race Down Under.

Time to check in with my
parole officer Michelle Visage.

Put your arms up against
the wall and spread 'em.

Is this some kind of a bust?

Mmm. Not anymore.

[laughter]

The lovable and laughable Rhys Nicholson.

Now, Rhys, have you ever been arrested?

Tilda Swinton had me
arrested for identity fraud.

[laugher]

Some credit card stuff and
perjury, attempted manslaughter.

And our extra special
guest judge Lucy Lawless.

Hello, my darling.

Hello, Ru.

Thank you for gracing our country.

We are loving your country.

We're so thrilled to have you here.

This week, we challenged our queens

to show off their acting chops in
the prison drama Caged Queens.

[laughter]

Racers, start your engines. And
may the best Drag Queen win.

Category is Fly Girls.
Insects on the runway.

First up, Molly Poppins.

♪ Condragulations ♪

You've heard of a praying mantis.

Honey, get ready for the slaying mantis.

Hey, buddy. My eyes are up here.

[laughter]

From head to toe, I am
serving my signature slime.

I love my look.

There's so many rhinestones on it.

♪ Condragulations ♪

I'm just ready to feel this bug fantasy.

She's an endangered Drag Queen.

RUPAUL: Kween Kong.

QUEEN 2: The essence of what I'm serving.

Mother Earth, grounded.

Earth mother, power.

RUPAUL: Michelle, are those her mothballs?

[laughter]

MICHELLE: Moths
are drawn to flamers, you know?

♪ Something to prove ♪

RUPAUL: Aubrey Haive.

QUEEN 5: Aubrey Haive.

♪ Right from the start ♪

♪ So proud of you ♪

QUEEN 5: I look fucking good

in this beautiful Mugler. Inspired outfit.

♪ I wanna thank you... ♪

I'd like to tell a story,

show you more on the runway
than just a beautiful garment.

♪ So much fun ♪

RUPAUL: I didn't know
this was a strip show.

[laughter]

♪ Condragulations ♪

♪ Condragu-la-la-la-la-la-lations ♪

LUCY: I think that was unfortunate.

RUPAUL: Minnie Cooper.

♪ Condragulations ♪

LUCY: Oh, Mariah will be so proud.

[laughing]

RHYS: What I love about
butterflies is they start

as this caterpillar and
they turn into this beautiful,

glamorous creature.

♪ Condragulations ♪

QUEEN 7: I'm serving fashion.

I've got the blue, the green.

I love my beehive.

I'm loving my silhouette.

I'm loving me.

It's got a pretty face, butterfly.

Beverly Hills.

MICHELLE: Otherwise known as citronella.

I'm just having the best
time on the runway right now.

I cannot stop showing off
every little corner

and crevice of my beautiful outfit.

Excuse me, ma'am, your fly's open.

What are you gonna
do with all that thorax?

RUPAUL: Pomara Fifth, Sixth, and Seventh.

QUEEN 10: On the runway
I'm giving you blue moon cicada.

Cicada, I don't even know her.

[laughter]

QUEEN 10: I'm jeweled up.

I'm filling my Wing Fly Girl fantasy.

♪ Bitch ♪

♪ Has paid off ♪

QUEEN 10: I love my deconstructed wings.

Cicada's wings are generally see-through.

LUCY: She's husk of her former self.

[laughter]

RUPAUL: Spankie Jackzon.

MICHELLE: Take that, J-Lo.
This is the original Fly Girl.

[laughter]

♪ You gave your heart ♪

♪ Right from the start ♪

QUEEN 5: I'm loving my fly.

Inspired outfit.

I feel like it's glittery and
I feel like I've got a bit of

drama as well with my wings.

♪ I wanna thank you for a job well done ♪

RUPAUL: Hannah Conda.

♪ Condragulations, you're so much fun ♪

She's been in mothball since the '30s.

[laughter]

QUEEN 4: Tonight on the runway,

I am serving the diva queen.

♪ Condragu-la-la-la-la-la-lations ♪

Michelle: To know me is to larva me.

I feel gorgeous.

It is elegant.

It is regal.

Why don't you come up and
inseminate [indistinct]

me sometime?

♪ Condragulations ♪

RUPAUL: Yuri Guaii.

QUEEN 7: So tonight on the runway,

I am a praying mantis.

Hmm. Very fun.

Did I kill my husband and eat him?

Maybe.

Am I on acid and having a bad trip?

Probably.

I'm here, and I'm ready

to fucking split some queen's throat.

♪ Condragulations ♪

I don't know what
happened to my ex-husband.

MICHELLE: Now take a bow. I mean bow.

Kia or a, queens.

Kia or a!

Aussie, Aussie, Aussie.

Oi, oi, oi.

[laughter]

Now it's time for the world premiere

of the most anticipated
trailer of the year.

Let's take a look.

NARRATOR: They're brutal
and bodacious bombshells.

Let's take a look into the
sordid lives of Caged Queens.

What the hell?

How did a beautiful pop star
like me Chantal Minogue,

end up in a place like this?

I mean, I did steal $10.000
worth of contour sticks,

but I mean, I was their brand ambassador.

Whether they knew it or not.

G'day, g'day, g'day, little lady.

Oh, finally.

I need to speak to your manager.

Manager?

I don't even know her.

My name is Chiquita.

Cool.

What's your job here, Chickie?

The next time you call me,
Chickie, will be your last.

And I've just been given
head of inmate liaisons.

Now squat.

Spread them, sweet cheeks.

Ex-squeeze me.

Spread this marmite all over this bread.

You're on kitchen duty.

Oh, this place sucks.

I want to go home!

[evil laughter]

NARRATOR: Meanwhile,
across the prison in the H wing.

Oh, Deidre, I've been absolutely
rushed off my feet.

Bang!

Oh, Dezerie.

You look like an absolute dog's breakfast.

You need some of my new product.

Oh.

It's called Deirdre's Toilet Chardonnay!

Sorta good.

But needs something a little extra.

It's gonna sell like hotcakes.

[laughter]

Yeah. I've come up with this plan.

Have you heard of the new
inmate, Chantelle Minogue?

She's trying to help us escape
out of this bloody hell hole.

[laughter]

CHIQUITA: And next in
the Prison Talent Quest

Shazza and the Shiv Sheilas
performing... Koala Girl!

♪ Cover girl! ♪

♪ Put the bass in your walk ♪

♪ Head to toe, let your whole body talk ♪

♪ Cover Girl! ♪

♪ Put your bass in your walk ♪

♪ Head-to-toe, let your whole body talk ♪

And the winner of the Prison
Talent Contest is

Shazza and the Shiv Sheilas!
[cricket chirping]

CHIQUITA: Shazza and the Shiv Sheilas!

Wait.

What did she just say?

We've just won the Prison Talent Contest.

We've got to go back.

You're a winner, babies.

[cheers and applause]

Hold up.

What's with that big hole?

What did you just call me?

What can we do for you today?

I'm going to tonight's big execution,

and I need to look amaze balls.

Tell you what, for a pack of ciggies,

I whiten your teeth

and I throw in a free anal bleaching.

Oh, I bet you will.

Tell me, how did you
get your lips so plump?

I used live bedbugs.

Uh, speaking of bedbugs,

I heard that Big Bev
has a new prison bitch.

The only thing I know is
that if she crosses me or you,

I'll slit her throat while she sleeps.

Oh, you sweet talker.

I am so sorry I'm late.

I don't like waiting around for bitches.

Bitch.

Here they come.

Act natural.

Hi.

Keep walking.

They're executing her tonight.

What did she do?

She wrote the scripts for
all the acting challenges

for RuPaul's Drag Race.

[screams]

There's something you should know.

I did the lighting for Season 1?

Ew.

I've been serving hard time
in this hellhole ever since.

What are we doing with this pavlova again?

When Veggie serves her last meal.

She'll find this file,

so she can escape.

I don't get it.

But you're the boss, applesauce.

NARRATOR: It's the night of
Veggie's execution.

The only thing that stands
between her and death

is a call from the warden.

Here's your final meal
before we flip the switch.

Thanks, but I'm not hungry.

Eat the pavlova.

How about something salty?

Get those nuts away from my face.

Oh, you wrote that line.

[applauding]

You might hate my scripts, but
please don't hate the writer.

Can you find it in your
hearts to forgive me?

Execute her.

Hey, guys.

It's been so long

since I've worked one of
these electric chair thingies.

[phone ringing]

Hello.

It's the warden.

Oh, you don't say.

Oh, you don't say.

Ooh, you don't say.

So, is the execution cancel led?

He didn't say it.

I'm just kidding.

Veggie can leave. Yay!

This is the worst execution
party I've ever been to.

And the overhead lighting sucks.

Here's the switch?

Oh, that's tickles!

Oh, right there. Right there. Right there.

Uh. [Veggie moaning]

NARRATOR: Caged Queens 2.

Electric Timaru. Coming soon.

[laughter]

[applause]

I can't wait till that comes out.

This week you worked as teams,

but tonight, you'll be
judged as individuals.

Based on your Caged Queens performances

and your Fly Girl presentations
made some decisions.

When I call your name,
please step forward.

Molly Poppinz.

Beverly Kills,

Pomara Fifth.

Ladies, you are safe.

You may leave the stage.

Ladies, you represent the
tops and bottoms of the week,

and now it's time for
the judges' critiques.

First up, Kween Kong.

So tonight, you look beautiful.

I love that you chose the death moth.

And that's gorgeous.

Let's talk about Baby Bill.

I wanted you to be ditzy, not valley girl.

It wasn't really getting to
where we needed it to be.

I've seen your work in the real world.

And you're a killer, a
destroyer of stages and worlds.

And I know that and
you know that, show this lady.

Did you have fun doing it?

Absolutely fucking not.

I hated it. I had a horrible time.

Lucy Lawless, you were my idol growing up.

Oh, I broke so many of the sofas
in my house 'cause

I would tumble over the back

of being Xena the warrior princess.

I'm so embarrassed that
you had to watch me at that.

But mentally,

the past couple of years
has been a struggle.

It's a fine balance between being happy

and being extremely depressed.

When I'm trying to feel

a legitimate feeling to
work off of as an actor,

I'm just not getting there.

Whatever you're going through, we get it.

You're a seasoned performer.

You really have to trust your directors.

I can do better. I know it.

Thank you. Up next, Aubrey Haive.

It's always scary to be the first one out.

I'm scary.

Rhys is just Rhys.

Once you started to give
into it, then it got better.

I wished you had done
that from the beginning.

Probably not the strongest performance.

RUPAUL: I wasn't quite sure
what you were trying to do.

As you're standing here stunning, emotion,

a couple little hiccups from time to time.

Tonight on the runway,

the problem was you were like

literally driving
the struggle bus tonight.

Nothing was working. You had 18 larvae.

Then they fell out of your purse,

which was a really cute idea.

And then one wing worked.

Yeah.

You had a lot of business to do.

- She's a businesswoman.
- RUPAUL: Yeah.

She had a lot to do. And
maybe too much for today.

But she gave it a go.

[laughter]

Minnie Cooper.

Minnie, where the other queens
were nervous,

you did not give a shit.

I was thoroughly impressed.

And I'm glad to see a seasoned queen

deliver and show these
young'uns what it's all about.

It was like fully formed from the get go.

Tonight, on the runway, so pretty.

This silhouette is so gorgeous.

It always works.

It's always flattering.

And you look absolutely gorgeous.

Thank you, Minnie.

Up next, Yuri Guaii.

Quite a spectacular look, Yuri.

Fashion's your game, and I'm here for it.

This is one of my favorite things

I've ever seen on Drag Race.

Let's talk about your performance.

You were struggling with that.

I was trying to get you to a femme fatale,

which, believe it or
not, is less versus more.

And jokes were being run over.

Because there are clues in the word.

It's like a puzzle.

And then you get to understand, you know,

what's being said here.

Puzzles are a bit too hard for me.

Some puzzles are too hard.

You're right.

But you look like
a beautiful puzzle on stage.

Spankie Jackzon.

You are the Jackzon they don't speak of.

[laughter]

Tonight, I want to say bravo
to finally wearing some tights.

[laughter]

Just for you. Honestly.

Let's stay on that trajectory.
Okay, babes.

Spank you, spank me.

In the challenge, I could have
watched you answer

a phone for hours and hours and hours.

You kind of held Caged Queens 2 together

actually with your Bulgarian charm.

I agree.

I thought your characterization
was so much fun.

The outfit looks good.

Strong night for you.

Thank you very much.

Hannah Conda.

G'day.

Hannah, this look tonight.

Wow! Wow! Wow!

I would describe this as grand.

It is so beautiful from antenna to toe.

Your acting.

I give you a ten.

Oh, thank you.

Really well done.

And you look very glamorous.

Thank you.

Thank you, ladies.
I think we've heard enough,

while you untuck in the workroom.

The judges and I will deliberate.

You may leave the stage.

Oh, beveraginos.

I'm gonna have a beveragino.

Well, I'm definitely in the bottom.

Absolutely 1.000%.

- Bottom?
- You're in the bottom?

- Why?
- Wait, what?

100% in the bottom.

Why?

They all found my
performance really like meh.

- Oh.
- Okay.

How are you feeling over here, babe?

I think it's going to be the two of us

lip syncing against each other.

I love you, sis.

Just go for it. You know what I mean?

Honestly, this look is fuckin' everything.

This is when you order it online.

And this is when it arrives.

[laughter]

What did they say about yours?

Ask Hannah.

Minnie Cooper [indistinct].

I feel like my opinions
are offending people.

My delivery isn't great.

I was so hurt by what
Pomara did in the morning,

laughing at my disability.

I thought I'm just gonna be
direct and truthful

'cause she hurt me.

Here we go.

I've mentored Pomara
in a talent quest before,

and I never said this when I mentored you,

I didn't enjoy it.

Really?

I found you entitled and rude.

Entitled?

All right, like, gloves are off.

Here we go. Let's do it. Come at me.

Prior to coming here that's why I heard,

"I don't mind that Pomara does drag.

I just hate that she gets paid for it."

I just made a joke, and whoever
told you that is very unkind

because they are responsible,

not me.

I mean, that's really.

- I know, I said it.
- I mean, you said it.

- Yeah, I said.
- I mean-

- I apologize.
- What you mean?

And you don't even need
to ask me for the apology.

- I give it to you.
- Thank you.

Am I still pissed? Yeah,

I'm still fucking pissed because

the last eight years you've
had this opinion of me.

Can we let this go now? Yeah, let it go.

Can we let it go?

I'm sorry.
Here, come and give me a cuddle.

I'm going to handle it,

you know, professional

'cause that's what I'm about.

Since I got here,

like, I have needed
to get that off my chest.

And I appreciate you saying it.

I have very strong opinions,

and that can be quite
daunting for young people.

One more hug. There you go.

I think I've dealt with that very well.

Fuck off now, mole.

Yeah, fuck off.

All right. Just between us kangaroos.

What do you reckon?

Kween Kong?

There no denying how amazing Kween is.

She is beautiful to look at.

I think she is really just
getting in her own way.

Like the moth

she was dressed up as tonight,

she is stuck in a cocoon.

I've seen tapes of her onstage.

She knows how to command an audience.

She just has to transfer
that to the camera.

Aubrey Haive?

Listen, Aubrey, once she did
trust us, gave us some gems,

but it took a long while.

I think both on the stage today

and in the challenge yesterday,
she overcomplicated everything.

It was kind of confusing herself.

She's just same as a few...
few other of these girls.

She's stuck in a little trap.

You know, I've fallen into that trap,

I must say, and getting locked
up. Happens to the best of us.

At the end of the day, these kids

are so concerned about the way they look.

- Yes.
- That the energy goes into that.

Exactly.

And not into the performing,
into whatever else is needed.

That's what the new
generation needs to focus on.

That's why the old broads acted
the pants off everybody else.

That's right. Which
brings us to Minnie Cooper.

What a treat Minnie was.

Minnie came on to the set looking insane.

- And that...
- [laughter]

And that was perfect for her character.

And tonight, she looked
absolutely beautiful.

She's a spitfire and
she's a legend for a reason.

She understands who
she is and she delivered.

Let's move on to Yuri Guaii.

She was not able to take direction.

I was trying to say
this is a femme fatale.

This is not in your face.

She didn't need to do that,
but she wanted to do that.

[laughter]

Tapping at that performance,

it just kept somehow
getting stranger and stranger

and not necessarily
in the right direction.

She was alone on the stage in her head.

She wasn't working off other people.

Tonight, however, this
look was phenomenal.

Everything about it was magical.

That hair was captivating and it just...

you knew exactly what she was.

So, let's talk about Spankie.

You know, Spankie came in
with his deranged character.

We knew exactly what she was doing.

Now, she didn't know
what accent she was doing,

and neither did we.

It was actually something
funnier about the character.

And tonight, on the runway, what
an improvement from last week.

The look tonight was such an improvement.

She's a lot of fun.

Last week, her look was rough as guts,

but this week was an improvement.

But where she shines
is in her performance.

In her wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

It really made that
character come to life.

All right. Hannah Conda.

Her character, Deirdre,
was so fun to watch.

You see her physical comedy
at that moment when she said,

"You've got to try some of my product\."

She splits her legs.

The rhythm of it was hilarious.

MICHELLE: Tonight on
the runway, my goodness.

She looked like a black and white film

and I thought it was so beautiful.

Silence. I've made my decision.

Bring back my girls.

Welcome back, ladies.

I've made some decisions.

Spankie Jackzon, the warden called.

He said condgratulations!

You're the winner of
this week's challenge.

- Yes!
- Yes! Yes!

Spankie!

Oh, my God.

Like mind-blowing.

Like...

You've won a luxury four-night stay

at a Sofitel property of your choice

in Australia or New Zealand

from Sofitel, Auckland Viaduct Harbor.

Thank you so much.

[upbeat music]

Hannah Conda,

Minnie Cooper.

You are both safe.

Thank you. Appreciate it.

Let's go, girl.

Well done.

[suspenseful music]

Yuri Guaii,

you're safe.

YURI: Thank you so much.

You may join the other girls.

Good job, baby.

Aubrey Haive, Kween Kong.

I'm sorry, my dears, but you
are both up for elimination.

QUEEN 1: I'm not going anywhere.

Two queens stand before me.

QUEEN 2: I'm here, and I'm ready.

So I'm excited to pull it
out of my ass [indistinct].

This is your last chance to impress me

and save yourself from elimination.

The time has come for

you too lip sync for your life.

Good luck. And don't fuck it up.

♪ I love myself ♪

♪ I want you to love me ♪

♪ When I feel down ♪

♪ I want you above me ♪

♪ I search myself ♪

♪ I want you to find me ♪

♪ I forget myself ♪

♪ I want you to remind me ♪

♪ I don't want anybody else ♪

♪ When I think about you ♪

♪ I touch myself ♪

♪ Oh, I don't want anybody else ♪

♪ Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no ♪

There's tricks, there's legs,

there's arms, there's this, there's that.

♪ You're the one who
makes me come runnin' ♪

I don't know

what is gonna happen because it so tight.

♪ When you're around,
I'm always laughin' ♪

♪ I want to make you mine ♪

♪ I search myself ♪

♪ I want you to find me ♪

♪ I forget myself ♪

♪ I want you to remind me ♪

♪ I don't want anybody else ♪

♪ When I think about you ♪

♪ I touch myself ♪

♪ Oh, I don't want anybody else ♪

♪ Oh, no, oh, no, oh, no ♪

♪ I want you ♪

♪ I don't want anybody else ♪

♪ And when I think about you ♪

♪ I touch myself ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

What the fuck!

♪ I don't want anybody else ♪

♪ When I think about you ♪

♪ I touch myself ♪

♪ When I think about you ♪

♪ I touch myself ♪

[cheers and applause]

QUEEN 1: Well done.

QUEEN 2: Killed it [indistinct], girls.

Ladies, I've made my decision.

Kween Kong. Shantay, you stay.

You may join the other girls.

Thank you so much.

Aubrey Haive,

you are a young and talented queen,

and I cannot wait to see what you do next.

Now Sashay, away.

We love you. We love you. Yes!

[cheers and applause]

Aubrey, actually, you know what?

Misbehave 'cause life's too short.

[queens cheering]

Bye.

We love you, Aubrey. We love you, Aubrey.

Oh, I mean, like, I'm devastated.

Oh.

I think I tried to do too much.

Maybe I just need to chill out a bit.

This is definitely not the last

you're gonna see of Aubrey Haive.

She's only just started literally.

I've enjoyed this experience so much.

Now what do I do?

Just go home.

I'm gonna go out into the world now

and just have it be my... my oyster.

Take every single pearl that I can find.

Bye.

Ah!

Condgratulations, Queens!

Now remember, if you can't love yourself,

how in the hell are you
gonna love somebody else?

Can I get an amen up in here?

Amen!

All right. Now let the music play.

♪ Nobody wins when you're
playing with the game of love ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa ♪

RUPAUL: Next time on RuPaul's Drag Race.

You'll be working in pairs,

as you co-host a Down Under Drag Brunch.

Oh! Okay.

Is everybody happy?

Please stop yelling at me!

That was your line.

That's why I said it.

Oh, this is gonna be that fucking edit

- where they go...
- [mimics sad trombone music]

This is a way for them
to present themselves.

And I don't believe that she did that.

You look like a million bucks.

You were so in control.

Here you are. You've
shown up for the competition.