All language subtitles for sorry.to.bother.you.2018.multi.1080p.web.h264-lost

-(DIAL TONE)
-(NUMBER DIALING)

(LINE RINGING)

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

(CLEARS THROAT)

So, it says here
that you were manager

of the Rusty Scupper
Restaurant for five years, hmm?

Then a bank teller
at Bank of Oakland between 2014 to 2016?

Oh! And you were employee of the month.

What's that, uh,
trophy in the bag there?

Oh! Oakland High,
Moot Court Champion.

I'm a salesman at heart.

-That is intriguing.
-(CHUCKLES)

Mainly because I was the branch manager

at the Bank of Oakland
between 2014 and 2016.

And you, Mr. Green,
you never fucking worked there.

And the number that you gave
to the Rusty Scupper Restaurant?

Is that your friend Salvador's number?

The same Salvador
who applied for this job?

(MOUTHING)

I didn't know he applied here, too.

Might have been helpful if his
outgoing message didn't say,

"It's Sal, bitches."

This trophy and that plaque,
did you steal 'em?

No, I made them.

Well, I had them made.

Listen, I just really, really need a job.

Okay, Cassius Green.
Listen up, okay?

This is telemarketing.

We're not mapping
the fucking human genome here.

I don't care if you have
experience for this.

I'll hire damn near anyone.

You know what this
bootleg trophy tells me?

Tells me the only thing I need to know.

You have initiative, and you can read.

You will call as many contacts
as you can during your shift,

you will read the script
that we give you,

-and you will show up tomorrow happy.
-(CHUCKLES)

-ANDERSON: Mmm?
-Thank you.

Uh, thank you so much, Mr. Anderson.

One more thing, Cassius.
"Stuss."

"Stuss"?

(READING)

Stick to the script.
Stick to the script. You got it. Okay.

(CHUCKLING) Thank you so much.

CASSIUS: Troit.

Troit!

Troit!

(DETROIT SIGHS)

CASSIUS: You ever think about dying?

(DETROIT GRUNTS SOFTLY)

(SIGHING) Yeah, I'm alive.
Sometimes.

No, I don't mean, like, right now,
in a freak accident or something.

I mean, when we're old, like 90.

I think about it all the time.

Like, what will I have done that matters?

I just want to make sure that when I die,

I'll be surrounded by people who love me

and who I love back.

But what about when they die?

What do you mean?

I mean, like, at some point,
we're gonna die.

Our kids are gonna die.
Our kids' kids are gonna die.

And at some point, no one
on Earth will have existed.

And at some point,

the sun will explode
and everyone will have died,

and no one will know what I'm doing,

and what I'm doing right now
won't even matter.

Baby, baby, it will always matter, okay?

Because it matters now.
This moment, these moments.

When I kiss you,
it's not for posterity's sake.

Yeah, but... (SIGHS)
Okay, you got your calling.

Your art means something, right?

But I'm just out here surviving,
spinning around on the endless circle.

-You missed your cue.
-That's disgusting.

I said, "When I kiss you,
it's not for posterity's sake."

-Yeah, but...
-(MOANS)

(SIGHS)

Oh, God!

-Get a room!
-I got a room, motherfucker!

I thought you said you fixed that.

My landlord was supposed to fix it.

(DETROIT LAUGHING)

CASSIUS: I gotta move.

-Oh.
-I like that.

(SIGHS)

(GROANING SOFTLY)

I have to go to work anyway.

(MUFFLED GROAN)

(DETROIT SIGHS)

-Don't you start work today?
-Yeah.

They said they hire anybody
if you're looking for a second job.

You could try part-time.

WOMAN: (ON TV) Everyone is talking
about the WorryFree solution.

WorryFree is a revolutionary
new business and lifestyle model

taking the world by storm.

DETROIT: Baby,
how much are they paying you?

When you sign a WorryFree contract,

you're guaranteed employment
and housing for life.

Stop worrying and get WorryFree.

The WorryFree living quarters
are state-of-the-art,

the WorryFree food is to die for,

and WorryFree careers
are fulfilling and satisfying.

Cash, baby,
what are they paying you?

Um, I think it's just commission.

Hey, baby,

you ever think about this WorryFree shit?

DETROIT: Are you crazy?

What, working on a commission?

(LAUGHS) Nice earrings.

Hey, Cash.

I got overdue house notes, dude.

How much longer
I got to wait for my money?

Look, Serge, I just got a new job,
and I'll have some money for you soon.

Damn it, you four months late now.

It's like "soon" is the only
fucking word I hear from you.

Okay, I'm four months late, but...

Check this out. Damn.

God made this land for all of us,

and greedy people like you
want to hog it to yourself and your family

and charge all the rest of us
for the right to live.

-Me and my family?
-Yeah.

Cassius, I'm your fucking uncle.

The bank might take my fucking house.

Four fucking months.

I gave you that car you're driving.

-That's a damn bucket.
-Oh, yeah?

Give it back then. No?

That's what I thought.

I need my money in two weeks, asshole.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING IN CAR)

Hey.

Forty on two.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

MAN: What's up, man?

(INDISTINCT CONVERSATION)

(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)

Millions of dollars `went into these walls

just to make sure
that thousands of calls

can go out and in at the same time

without jamming the lines.

Log in here. Grab a seat.

Come on.

You studied the script?

-Yeah.
-Look, clock in,

don't be lazy,

and I won't have to be an asshole.

Make a sale, this light goes on.

You do real good,

eventually you might even
be able to be a Power Caller.

A Power Caller?

Where the callers are ballers.

Where they make the real money.

They even have their own elevator.

Oh, yeah, I saw that.

Stick to the script.

(SOFTLY) Um...

(GRUNTS SOFTLY)

(TYPING)

(CELL PHONE VIBRATING)

What the fuck?

Hello.

Hey, um, Mr. Davidson.

Cassius Green here.
Sorry to...

(MUFFLED CLAMORING)

-(GRUNTING)
-(MOANING)

WOMAN: Hello?

Uh, this is Cassius Green.
Sorry to bother you.

I just wanted to mention

-something else about...
-(MOANING)

-(STAMMERING) Insight Encyclopedia.
-(CALL DISCONNECTS)

Hello?

-Hi, Mrs. Costello.
-Yes.

This is Cassius Green.

I know that you've enjoyed
our, uh, series on bird-watching,

so I wanted to call and help you out.

I'm sorry, young man.
We don't have any money.

My husband's in the hospital.

(VOICE BREAKING) He's 73.
He's got stage IV cancer.

-(MRS. COSTELLO SOBBING ON PHONE)
-Um...

It's...

Um, it's interesting that
you say that, Mrs. Costello,

because book number five
in the Insight series

is all about wellness,
how to stay healthy on your own,

without even going to the doctor, so...

Damn it.

(SIGHS DEEPLY)

(INDISTINCT ARGUMENT)

Really? You gonna stuff
all those french fries in your mouth?

I feel incompetent and like
an asshole doing this job.

I don't feel any different.

Hey.

That's that dude from that show.

-Hey!
-(LAUGHS) Oh, shit!

-Hey!
-That's fucking cool. I hate that show.

But I never noticed that, uh, room.

-What is that?
-The VIP room.

What the hell is a place like this
doing with a VIP room?

I used to be in there all the time.

Well, what qualifies a person to be VIP?

Well, you need the password.

And this week it's "upscale elegance."

Actually, every week
it's "upscale elegance."

-I'm going.
-Where the fuck you going?

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

Yeah!

Fuck!

(GRUNTS)

That's some baller shit.

Hey. Mr. D. Imits, Cassius Green here.

Sorry to bother you. I just...

-(LINE DISCONNECTS)
-(LAUGHING)

Hey, youngblood.

-What up?
-Let me give you a tip.

Use your white voice.

-My white voice?
-Yeah.

Man, I ain't got no white voice.

Oh, come on, you know
what I mean, youngblood.

You have a white voice in there.
You can use it.

It's like when you're
pulled over by the police.

-(CHUCKLES)
-Oh, no.

I just use my regular voice
when that happens.

I just say, "Back the fuck up
off the car and don't nobody get hurt!"

All right, man, I'm just
trying to give you some game.

You wanna make some money here?

Then read the script with a white voice.

Well, people say I talk
with a white voice anyway,

so why ain't it helping me out?

Well, you don't talk white enough.

I'm not talking 'bout Will Smith white.

-That ain't white, that's just proper.
-Hmm.

I'm talking about the real deal.

Okay, so like...

(IN NASAL VOICE)
"Hello, Mr. Everet. Cassius Green here.

"Sorry to bother you."

Nah, man.
Look, you got it wrong.

I'm not talking about sounding all nasal.

It's like, sounding like
you don't have a care.

Got your bills paid.
You're happy about your future.

You about ready to jump
in your Ferrari out there

after you get off this call.

Put some real breath in there.

Breezy, like,
"I don't really need this money."

You've never been fired. (LAUGHS)

Only laid off.

It's not really a white voice.

It's what they wish they sounded like.

So, it's like what they think
they're supposed to sound like.

Like this, youngblood.
(IN WHITE VOICE) Hey, Mr. Kramer.

This is Langston from RegalView.

I didn't catch you
at the wrong time, did I?

If you're ever gonna be a Power Caller,

you gotta know when to bag 'em
and when to tag 'em.

Yeah?

Hey. Um, what's bagging
and what's tagging?

Bagging is when you drop the call.

Like a dead body into a bag,

you drop that shit
'cause it crossed the line.

Tagging is when you claim that money.

It's a sale. Cha-ching!

Like when they put the tag
on the body at the morgue to identify it.

That's mine.

Maybe you already bagged
that dead body, right?

And you're just
about to walk away, skip town,

lay low for a little while.

But instead, you drag that heavy fucker

on out into the alley,
and then you tag it.

(STAMMERING) Okay. I just...

I feel like these metaphors
have not been cleared for this pep rally.

-Uh, okay. Diana?
-Oh. Yes. (CHUCKLES)

(SIGHS) Hi.

I'm new, so forgive me
for not knowing everyone's name yet.

Uh, my name is Diana

DeBauchery.

-That looks like "debauchery."
-DIANA: Well, it's not.

Uh, I am your new Team Leader,

and I know you're looking at me going,

"Is she a manager?
I'm scared." Okay.

"She's going to treat me
like a system of motorized appendages."

No. That stops here.
That stops right now.

You are not employees to me.

You are Team Members. We're a family now.
You know what that means?

It means I lean on you,
you lean on me. There's a synergy.

And you can feel that energy.
I know that you can.

People are starting to get
emotional, and I love that.

Does that mean we get paid more?

"No." (CHUCKLES) Okay,
but what is capital? Right?

I would argue that social currency now
is more important,

and don't take it from me,
take it from the news.

Take it from media, all kinds of media,
digital, paper, otherwise.

Media is changing, so is capital.
Get with it.

I don't want to scare you,
but it's a new world.

Okay, Team Members.
Let's, uh...

Thank you very much,
and let's all get back to work.

Remember. Hit your contacts.
Up the ante.

Work the grid. And...

-ALL: Stick to the script.
-That's right.

Any one of you can turn Power Caller
and be rolling in dough.

Oh, excuse me.

-Um, okay.
-(MACHINE WHIRS)

(CHUCKLES) Nothing in this office
is free, man.

You gotta put money in there.

Oh, really?

It's okay. You're not missing out.
It tastes like shit.

Fuck. I thought I could
get lucky, asshole.

I was just giving you shit, man.
I'm... I'm Squeeze.

I've seen you around for a couple weeks.

It was a good question in there.

Cassius. People call me Cash.

It was a really good
question in there, man.

-What, about us getting paid?
-Yeah.

I mean, I just think it's kind of silly
that we have to be all excited

-for this bullshit.
-I know, right?

Exactly. I mean,
you just cut straight to the chase, man.

That's awesome.

A player gotta mob up with us
for some scrill and bennies.

What the fuck does that mean?

Uh, there's a bunch of us

that are organizing to get us paid more.

Get some benefits.

We could really use
your energy to jump things off.

Yeah, look,

-I gotta get back to work, man.
-(CLEARS THROAT)

Hey, man, look,
I'm sorry I got you like this,

but obviously we can't talk here.

So, grab a drink later.
It's on me.

Hey, lady, how much?

-Cool. We good?
-(SIGHS)

-Yeah.
-All right.

-DETROIT: Hey.
-What up?

-Who are you?
-CASSIUS: That's Squeeze.

-Squeeze.
-Uh, he works with us at RegalView.

Squeeze, Detroit.

-Detroit? That's cool.
-Yeah.

My parents wanted me
to have an American name.

Nice!

And Detroit is a brilliant
visual and performance artist...

No, my art is not twirling signs.

...who's about to open
her first show.

Okay, Mr. Embarrassing Intro Guy.

Squeeze, in high school, Cash was...

-(TIRES SCREECH)
-Shit!

Stuck brake. (GRUNTS)

Why do you always talk about
what I did in high school?

I mean, like, look at our
high school football team.

Literally. Look at 'em.

All they do is work at
the home furniture store

and play football all day.

Just like,
they're stuck or something.

Man, what the hell you talking 'bout?
I mean, they're friends.

Baby, can you please not talk
about the sun exploding tonight?

-Okay.
-Okay.

(MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)

CASSIUS: Yeah, but you know,
I just... At the end of the day,

I just don't want to be
stuck in a position.

-(THUNDER RUMBLES)
-Oh, shit.

D, wiper duty, please.

Come on, man.
I never get wiper duty.

You can wipe my ass, Sal.

-(ALL LAUGHING)
-Oh, really? With what? My tongue?

Well, shit, it might make
your breath smell a little bit better.

-(SINGING) Shitty breath Sal
-Sal

Shitty breath Sal

SAL: Oh, God.

The shittiest breath in Oakland

Keeping turning, Troit. Turn.

REPORTER: (ON TV)
The fourth day of violent protests

at WorryFree headquarters.

Protesters say WorryFree's method

of lifetime labor contracts
is a new form of slavery.

WorryFree CEO Steve Lift
was interviewed on Oprah today.

No. Conclusively no.

Our workers do not sign contracts
under threats of physical violence,

so, therefore, the comparison to slavery
is just ludicrous and offensive.

We're transforming life itself.

We're saving the economy.
I mean, we're saving lives.

It's all highlighted in my book.

I lay out the whole thing.

REPORTER: Many of the violent protesters
are part of the Left Eye Faction

and are identifiable
by the black mark under their left eye.

There's no employment for many people.

Even sweatshops have been
replaced by WorryFree LiveWork Centers.

These places are prisons,
and we're packed in there like sardines,

fed cheap slop and worked
to the bone 14 hours a day.

AUDIENCE: (ON TV)
I got the shit kicked out of me!

SAL: All I'm saying is
if you don't cook the spaghetti

in the sauce with the cheese in it first,
that's some white shit.

That's some bullshit, man.

You don't get to decide
what's black and what's white.

Well... But that's how
black folks do it, man.

No, nigga, I'm black.

We talked about that, man.

You kind of black.
You Lionel Richie black.

(LAUGHS)

Look, I make my noodles,
then I put the sauce on, then... Lookit,

then I put a little, uh, Parmesan...

It doesn't even fucking matter,
all right, 'cause pasta is from Italy.

Italians ain't white.

-Yes, they are, bro.
-Yes, they are!

Since the fuck when?

It's like the last 60 years, man.

Spaghetti is Chinese.

Speaking of white,
I'm gonna make a toast.

-Come on.
-All right.

CASSIUS: Okay.

(IN WHITE VOICE)
To my esteemed RegalView associates,

whom I revere with great fervor...

What?

...and to my alluring
and phenomenally talented fiancée...

I'd like to dedicate
this imbibing of intoxicating elixirs.

Here's to becoming a Power Caller.

Cassius, how'd you do that?

(IN NORMAL VOICE)
Old man at the jobby-job.

It's called the white voice.

I guess I'm natural at it.

That was on some
puppet master, voodoo shit.

Dude, you sounded overdubbed.

Magic white voice, man,
it's fucking scary.

Yeah, I've never seen that shit before.

But I have heard about

that Power Caller shit
that you're talking about.

That's a scam.

-Oh, yeah?
-Yeah.

If you work hard enough as a fry cook,
maybe you can become a manager.

Or... Or if you twirl
that sign really well,

then maybe you can twirl
a larger sign on a more glamorous corner.

No, I already have the best corner,

and the biggest sign,
and the best word. "Off."

It is the anchor to the slogan, so...

So, what's the point then?

What, you think I'm just
supposed to work, eat, fuck, sleep?

No, I'm not saying that.
I'm saying what we need...

We need a union at RegalView.

That way, we all get paid.

(IN WHITE VOICE)
Okay. Okay. Well said, broham.

I'm down.

-Hey, Cassius.
-Hey, Serge.

Uh, I get paid Friday,
so I'll have half your money by then.

Even if you had all the money,

your little four months'
rent wouldn't help me.

I owe too much.

If I don't come up
with a boatload of money

by next month, which I won't,

the bank is taking my shit.

You should find a new place.

Damn.

It's making my diabetes act up.

So, what you gonna do?

I've been talking to those
WorryFree people.

They sent me a brochure.
It don't sound that bad.

Three hots and a cot,
like we used to say.

-Oh, hell no, Serge. Come on.
-No, don't. Don't do that.

Look, we'll figure something out.

Yeah, well, let me tell you.
I got a special for you.

CASSIUS: (IN WHITE VOICE) Look,
you bring a chick home to your apartment.

It's clean. It's stylish.

Of course it is.
She's already seen that

from the guy she was with
two weeks ago.

And then her eyes move over
to those brown leather bad boys

from the Insight Encyclopedias
Intellectual Edition.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

-It's fuck time! Do you know what I mean?
-Yeah!

Yeah! Holla, holla, holla, holla, holla!

Oh, yeah?

Spin Doctors. Classic!

Tim, I want to chop it up more,
but I gotta get to my squash game.

Was that Visa or MasterCard?

God, this voice shit is crazy.

(BOTH LAUGH)

Yeah!

Oh!

Yeah!

-Yes! Tell that bitch "yes"! Yes!
-Yes!

Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Hey! Hey! Hey!

Where's the wine at?

Power Calling all you motherfuckers!

I'm going to have you playing
basketball in Pelican Bay!

Yeah!

Baby, yes!

Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!

Whoo! Whoo!

-Yes!
-(GRUNTS)

-(CHUCKLES)
-(EXHALES DEEPLY)

I should probably
get back to work, man.

You're stoked, man!

You're doing so fucking good
with the voice thing.

But hit more contacts per hour.

Mmm-hmm.

Oh. They're talking about you, bro.

You're on your way. Pow!

To where, heaven?

Almost.

PC, baby. Power Caller.

Oh...

Did you hear what he just said?

SAL: Yeah, yeah, I heard him, man.

He told me the exact same shit
three months ago.

Nice earrings.

Thanks. Made 'em myself.

(R&B MUSIC PLAYING)

What kind of world is it

when this is the most
popular show in America?

They say 150 million people
watch this every night.

LANGSTON: I, personally, love seeing

a motherfucker get beat down
and humiliated.

(LAUGHING) Makes me feel warm inside.

I got the motherfucking T-shirt.

-Oh!
-Check this.

Oh!

-I'm gonna go dance, man.
-All right. Yeah, motherfucker.

Mmm, mmm, mmm. No.

(CHUCKLES)
Give me the good stuff.

Give me the good stuff.

Yeah.

That's what I'm talking about.

So, why you ain't dancing, man?

Motherfucker, I'm too old
for that shit. (CHUCKLING)

Man, look, what happened
to just doing the motherfucking dog?

Umph-umph-umph-bow-wow.

You know... Freaking, you know
what I'm saying, man? (LAUGHING)

Shit, now you got to dislocate
your motherfucking shoulder.

What the fuck I look like
doing that shit?

CASSIUS: You...

Hey. Power Callers, right?

They make a shit ton of money, man.

I'm talking about, like, Benz

and expensive house payment
type of money.

How the fuck is that even possible?

If you selling the bullshit
we selling, it's impossible.

But they not selling
the bullshit we selling.

So, I guess comparing to what we doing

to what they're doing
is like apples to oranges.

More like apples and the Holocaust.

All right. Bye.

(MAN SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)

Don't look into the light.

Fucking asshole.

Cassius!

-What up, bro?
-What's up, man?

-Good, man.
-Ah, that hurt.

It's all good.
I've been telling everybody

how you've been kicking
all types of ass at work.

Yeah. I mean, it's crazy.
I finally feel like I'm good at something.

I'm feeling myself, man.
(CHUCKLES)

-SAL: Word.
-I'm a fucking monster at this.

(ALL GROWLING)

-Man. Fucking dope, man.
-That's awesome, man.

-That's awesome.
-Yeah.

(GRUNTS, LAUGHS)

-Hey, Sugar Foot. Hey.
-Hey, Lovely.

-Can I get that?
-Who invited you?

Who asked you?

I was hoping you'd pop up earlier.

I thought you were coming by.

Oh, to your gallery?
I thought you said don't come.

Your friends were helping you out.

Baby, that's what I said,
but don't listen to what I say.

Listen to what I want.

-I'm confused.
-Yeah, I know you are.

But are you gonna pick me up on Friday?

-That's what I want.
-Is cash green?

Yeah. Cash is green.

-Can I get a light?
-SAL: No.

SQUEEZE: Those are nice earrings.

Wait, baby. I didn't know you
changed your earrings.

SAL: Detroit, I didn't know
you made earrings of your ex-boyfriends.

(ALL LAUGHING)

SQUEEZE: All right, everybody.

This is a pretty amazing turnout.

I hope you guys all know
that we're in this together.

That this is all of us, ride or die.

You know what today is?

Today is the warning shot
telling them that we stand united.

If we get this right today,

not only will it be our floor,

but it will be every other floor
in RegalView and beyond.

A 20-minute work stoppage
during prime calling time.

I'll give the call.
Sal, what's the call?

Fuck you, pay me.

(STAMMERS) The other one.

Phones down.

Phones down.

Okay? We hang up the phones,
put down our headsets.

Now, they're gonna single some of us out.

Threaten our jobs.

Fuck that.

-Yes, fuck that.
-LANGSTON: Fuck that.

SAL: Fuck that.
MAN: Yeah, fuck.

We ride for anyone they try to fire.

We fight

because we make the profits
and they don't share.

If we're gonna give them our day,

we need to have enough
to cover our basic necessities.

-Human decency.
-MAN: Yeah.

Is anyone not down?

Speak now.

Nah, fuck that, Squeeze.
We're ready.

Hmm?

Yeah. Um, one for all. All for one.

Yeah. I brought all types of weapons.
Whoo!

All right, folks. Let's meet
back here at 3:00 p.m. Okay?

-Don't. It's not that serious.
-SAL: Okay, all right, cool.

SQUEEZE: It's like serious,
but it's not that...

SAL: All right. Sure.
But I'm ready, though.

(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)

(CLEARS THROAT)

(IN WHITE VOICE) Thanks, Mr. Goldberg.

As always, we'll be getting
that out to you right away.

By the way...

SQUEEZE: RegalView management,

you are hereby warned.

We will not be overlooked.

JOHNNY: Fucking God...

Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!

Phones down!

JOHNNY: Fuck you! Fuck you!

MAN: And fuck you!

Fuck you, RegalView!

ALL: (CHANTING) Fuck you, RegalView!
Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!
Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!
Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!
Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!
Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!

(ALL CHEERING)

MAN: Oh, man!

Whoo!

Out, out, out, out, out, out, out.

(DOOR SHUTS)

All right, hey, look.
I know you're gonna threaten to fire me.

And go ahead, whatever.
I don't care anymore

'cause we're gonna take
this fucking place down.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Pack up your shit and get out.

Well, fuck you and fuck you
and fuck you!

-ANDERSON: What?
-Fuck you!

-Fuck you!
-No, no, no, no, Mr. Green.

You're starting to sound
a little paranoid here.

We're the bearers of good news.

Great news.

Great motherfucking news.

Great motherfucking news.

Power Caller.

-What the fuck...
-Yeah, we just got the call.

They think you're A-1 material.

You're going upstairs, my compadre.

Yes. You are getting a promotion.
9:00 a.m. tomorrow morning.

-Do you have a suit?
-Of course he does.

Powerful, young, strong,
intelligent Power Caller.

(STAMMERING) But they, uh...

Oh, God. They're gonna do
what they're gonna do.

You're not going against their actions.

All their issues are down here,
not up there.

(CLICKS TONGUE)

Two very different kinds of telemarketing.

Wait, wait, wait... Okay, um...

(EXHALES)

This is your moment. Don't waste it.

ALL: Whoo-whoo! Whoo-whoo!
Whoo-whoo!

Okay.

Maybe you're right.

JOHNNY: The big money.

The top fucking tier of telemarketing.

Making history with legends
like Hal Jameson.

Badass.

(ALL EXCLAIM)

Oh, it's a really good batch,
so I hope you like France.

You should have some.

(ALL LAUGH)

-Should I just drink it right now?
-JOHNNY: Yes!

Oh, yes!

-Because we didn't have any cups.
-Power Caller.

-Yeah!
-JOHNNY: Yes!

(JOHNNY GRUNTS)

Power Caller, baby.

JOHNNY: Power Caller, man!
ANDERSON: Power Caller!

Power Caller. Power Caller.

(DIANA CHUCKLES)

Wow, you really are ready, aren't you?

Hey, Ms. D. Yeah.

Wow. Oh, okay. Well,
let's do this, motherfucker.

(CHUCKLES) I've always wanted to say that.

-(SIGHS)
-Um, okay.

I would be remiss
if I didn't bring up your pink shirt.

I think it's extraordinary and sexy.

You know, 35% of men who wear pink
are more likely to start a franchise.

-Is that...
-Yeah.

-Oh. Yeah.
-(LAUGHS) Wow. Damn.

-This is crazy.
-Oh, I'm sorry.

So clumsy.

(KEYPAD BEEPING)

(CLEARS THROAT)

Almost done. (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
This job's crazy, right?

Do you need help or something?

(SIGHS, CLEARS THROAT)

Okay.

(SIGHS DEEPLY)
It's very secure. It's very...

FEMALE VOICE: Welcome, Power Caller.

Today is your day to dominate the world.

You are RegalView's elite brigade.

Take your place alongside
legends like Hal Jameson.

You call the shots.

(CHUCKLES) What?

(CHUCKLES)

FEMALE VOICE:
You are in your sexual prime.

The top of the reproductive pile.

All right. Does it do that every time?

Welcome to the Power Calling Suite,
Mr. Green.

White voice at all times here.

(IN WHITE VOICE)
Yes, I, uh, almost forgot.

Good luck.

Nice suit, by the way.

You've been selected, Mr. Green,

because you have the potential
to be a great telemarketer.

The potential.

Do you know what we sell up here?

-Oh, I heard it's a...
-Ah, we sell power.

Firepower. Manpower.

When US weapons manufacturers
sell arms to other countries,

who do you think, Mr. Green,

makes that call at
the precisely perfect time?

Which is, of course, dinner. We do.

Before a drone drops a bomb
on an apartment building in Pakistan,

who drops the bomb-ass sales pitch,
you may ask, Cassius?

We do.

Okay, so you said firepower, manpower?

WorryFree is our biggest client.

We help thousands of companies
utilize WorryFree workers

to improve their efficiency.

So, wait, are you telling me
you sell slave labor

to companies over the phone?

Hot damn it. You are a sharp one.

Hey, what the fuck are you doing?

Dave, stop him!

Shit!

Left Eye, bitches!

WorryFree has resuscitated America.

Workers live in space-efficient dwellings

in the same facilities
where production occurs.

They make anything
and they make everything.

Lifetime contracts, so no wages needed.

They make automobiles
for what it used to cost to make bicycles.

(IN NORMAL VOICE)
Okay, but see, I don't know if I can...

Ah! Sugar on top, white voice.

Yeah, but what I'm saying is,
I don't know if I'm gonna be able to...

(LAUGHS) Here's the starting salary.

Hmm?

(LAUGHING IN WHITE VOICE)

Well, man, I'm gonna have
to get me some new suits.

You'll be working here until late.

We need you in the mix right away.

(CHUCKLES)

(HORN HONKING)

Hey, baby, what's your sign?

I haven't heard that one before.

Yo, that was crazy yesterday.

That was like
that scene out of Norma Rae.

You know, the one where
she's, like, on the table.

Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, RegalView is scared shitless.

We'll win.

Can I check that out?

Yeah.

Oh, okay.

(LAUGHING)

Okay. Bravo.

Where'd you learn how to do that?

Down in LA.

We organized the first
sign-twirlers' union there.

Oh, okay.
Is that what you do?

You just go from place
to place stirring up trouble?

Trouble's already there.
I just help folks fix it.

Yeah, that's what I do
with my art, too, you know.

Expose the bullshit.

-It's not exactly the same thing.
-Oh, it's pretty much the same.

I haven't seen your stuff,
so I can't...

I'm not gonna show you my stuff.

So, how does it work with, uh...

With you and Cassius?

You know, you sound like a radical.

He's... I don't know, uh...

(CHUCKLING) He's what?

(HORN HONKING)

Honk.

He's real.

He's not that fake-ass
bougie gallery world.

So, that's how it works.

Well, you're rubbing him off right. So...

He helped with the work stoppage,

so your fire is rubbing off on him.

I like it.

I'm going.

You look like you're done here
if you need a ride.

Nah, Cash is on the way.
But thank you.

(SMACKS LIPS)

Nice work.

(HORN HONKS)

WOMAN: Hey, girl.
We gotta go! Quick!

Thank you.

(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)

(MUSIC STOPS)

You okay?

Yeah.

-Did you get into an accident?
-No.

How about robbed
or something else crazy like that,

so I don't think you flaked
and left me on a corner for an hour?

Yeah, I know. Look, baby,
I was gonna talk to you about it earlier,

but I didn't know if it would
be a for sure thing or not.

But, as of today, I'm a Power Caller.

Does that mean you can
pay me back my $80?

(IN WHITE VOICE)
Hell, yes, baby, of course I can.

Stop, Cassius. Stop, it's freaky.

What do they sell?

(IN NORMAL VOICE) Am I finally
gonna be able to see your show?

(CHUCKLES) Baby, this is beautiful.

And big.

Africa.

Oh, really, is that what this is?

Yeah, I mean, they're big
because they're Africa.

Uh-huh.

So, I added the sculptures from last year.

Oh, okay. Well, if nobody shows up,
at least it'll look full.

(LAUGHS)

Can I ask you a question?

Why did you choose Africa?

I wanted to talk about a life
shaped by exploitation.

(MUTED) About fighting
for a say in our own lives.

About how beauty, love, and laughter

thrive and flourish under
almost any circumstances.

-Right.
-Hmm.

How capitalism basically started
by stealing labor from Africans,

and about how you're nodding
like you're listening, but you're not.

Oh, no. Sorry, baby.
I was receiving that.

I just, uh, had a long day and...

-It's work.
-It's okay.

You really want to hit this?

Yes.

(CASSIUS EXHALES)

(SIGHS) Yes, okay. Listening now.

-Capitalism in Africa is booming.
-(SHUSHING)

I'm done talking.

I just want to marinate in this.

-(SIGHS)
-This is major for me, Cash.

What I want to do is I want to sit here,

hit this weed, and just be here.

SQUEEZE: All right, guys.
That felt good the other day, right?

ALL: Yes.
SAL: Good, man.

Like I've known y'all my whole life,
you know.

(ALL MURMUR)

Don't forget that. Okay?

Remember each other's faces.

Cassius? What's up, man?
Where you been?

What's up with the suit?

CASSIUS: I got promoted.

What does that mean?
Are you a manager now?

That means I'm a Power Caller now.

About to be paid.

SQUEEZE: We're all trying
to get fucking paid.

-SAL: Yeah.
-But we're gonna do it as a team.

Are you on the team?

Yeah, I guess I'm still
on your little team,

but I'm playing from the bench.

The bench where you sit
and get your bills paid.

You know my uncle
is about to lose his house.

Cash, I'm sorry about your uncle, man,
but that don't mean sell out.

I'm not selling y'all out.

My success has nothing
to do with you, all right.

You just keep doing whatever it is

that you're fucking doing,
and I'll root for you.

-From the sidelines.
-Mmm-hmm.

And try not to laugh at that
stupid-ass smirk on your face.

We don't need this.

-Are you doing all right?
-Yeah, I'm doing good.

-How you doing?
-Fantastic.

-Fantastic?
-I hope you have a good day.

I hope you have a better week.

Mmm-hmm, I hope your month
is full of successful days

and a lot of great ventures.
I hope you just come up, brother.

I hope your whole fucking year
is spectacular.

-Oh, you hope my year is spectacular?
-Yeah.

You got something you want to say to me?

You got something you want to say?

-You smell great.
-You smell great. What is that?

Burberry. What you got on?

-Mmm. I forgot. It's just deodorant.
-Smells expensive. Okay.

-Yeah. We smelling good.
-Good.

Some smelling good brothers out here.

You're an awesome man,
and I appreciate you.

-I hope you find yourself.
-Yeah, we should go out. Get drinks.

-You want to get drinks?
-Yeah.

-How many drinks?
-Two. Three.

-Three? Five?
-Four. Five.

-Six? Eight?
-Seven. Nine.

-Ten?
-All of them!

-On me?
-It's on me. No, it's on me now.

-It's on you?
-Yeah, it's on me now.

-All right. All right!
-Yeah, it's on me!

-It's on you now.
-LANGSTON: Now!

Walk.

(KEYPAD BEEPING)

FEMALE VOICE: Greetings, Cassius Green.

I hope you did not masturbate today.

We need you sharp and ready to go.

I detect the pheromones
percolating out of your pores.

They say to others around you,

"Hold my penis while I piss
on your underestimated expectations."

Mr. Green, I am a computer,

but I wish I had hands
to caress your muscular brain.

Cassius Green, you've been
assigned a WorryFree campaign.

Brush up on that Chapter Six stuff.

(IN WHITE VOICE) Excuse me.

Ah!

And give them that radiant voice
of yours in the next half hour.

2:00 p.m.

Almost breakfast time in Japan.

CASSIUS: Oh, okay.
Doodily, doodily, doodily doo.

-Huh. (SPEAKING JAPANESE)
-Mr. Son.

Cassius Green of WorryFree calling.
Sorry to bother you.

I'm calling about
who is assembling your phone.

Now I know they're being made in China.

I'm a big fan of yours.

I've been following you
since you were with Takashi.

I cheered, literally,
when I found out you acquired Tanrio,

which is why I'm calling you
and not Phonarolla.

Hmm.

(WATER FLOWING)

Our team of dedicated workers

will make twice as many phones
at half the cost.

You'll double up your market share
over these bastards.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

Power Callers,
our very own Cassius Green

just made our client, WorryFree,
upwards of $10 million

in one call on his first day, nonetheless.

-Oh, it's not that much.
-Indeed one for the history books.

Cheers!

Excuse me for a second.

What can I do for you, chum?

Yes, I have a question.

I've just achieved a sort of
miraculous financial endeavor.

I'm also in a financial bind.

(IN NORMAL VOICE)
I'm gonna need a cash advance.

Hmm.

(BELL TOLLING)

(YAWNS)

This is where the magic happens, baby.

NARRATOR: (ON TV)
NTV Spots, WorryFree edition.

Hole puncher Jim Ellman.

AUDIENCE: (ON TV)
I got the shit kicked out of me!

REPORTER: This was the scene yesterday

at the RegalView telemarketers' strike.

The striking RegalView workers

are joined by other telemarketers,

phone operators, and university students

from all over the area.

After a long day
of hearty-ass work, you feel me?

We ready to eat.

This is where we get our grub on.

Mmm, mmm. Yum.

Swimming through the vat of hyena urine

is not as bad as it sounds.

What do we want?

We want enough money to pay our rent!

PROTESTERS: Yeah!

We want enough money
to not eat Cup O'Noodles every night.

PROTESTERS: Yeah!

I'm so sick of Cup O'Noodles!

SQUEEZE: We want to be able
to go see our doctor

when we get drunk one night.

PROTESTERS: Yeah!

And we hook up with someone
without using any protection.

Okay. Okay, yeah!

And we think we might
have contracted chlamydia or gonorrhea,

Or any one of those crazy STDs
that you've never heard of

that you find on selfdiagnosis.com!

Fuck RegalView!

-(ALL SHOUTING)
-Fuck RegalView!

PROTESTERS: Fuck RegalView!

Fuck RegalView! Fuck RegalView!

Fuck RegalView!

Fuck RegalView!

SAL: And fuck chlamydia, too.

REPORTER: Although strikers have kept

most replacement workers

from breaking the strike,

every morning
Stackwater security agents

successfully escort

RegalView's elite Power Callers

into the building.

For more on the RegalView strike,
let's go to the studio.

This is Ken Bagget, Channel 3 news.

(TV SWITCHES OFF)

(IN WHITE VOICE)
Hey, baby. Good morning.

No. Please, no.

Stop with that stupid voice, Cassius.

(CLEARS THROAT)

(IN NORMAL VOICE)
Didn't even realize I was doing it.

That's a problem, you know.

Sorry.

How long you been up?

I'm not up.

But I saw your TV debut.

Shit.

(GROANS)

-Cash, baby...
-(GROANS) Can we not? Please.

Look, I quit when the strike jumped off

because being with you
made it awkward for me, but...

Cassius!

You abandoned your friends.

Baby, look, I thought
they'd do a couple of stoppages and...

It's one thing to take the promotion,
but now you're a full-out scab.

Come on, baby,
the Power Callers ain't on strike.

No, but they should be.

I'm so tired of talking to you
about this.

You are crossing the picket line.

-I can't ride with you.
-Oh, you can't ride with me now?

But you was riding with me
all around Oakland.

All right, fine. Well, no more.

Baby, what are you asking me to do?

Are you asking me to quit
the fattest job I ever had?

But, Cash, it's not fat!

It is morally emaciated.

You sell fucking slave labor, Cassius!

What the fuck isn't slave labor? Huh?

-Oh, my God. Side-step.
-What is it?

You side-step more than
the fucking Temptations.

You know what, fuck you, man.

Fuck you, all right!

Fuck you 'cause I'm doing something
that I'm really fucking good at.

I'm really good at it, and I'm important.
I'm making shit happen.

And you don't appreciate the shit
'cause you already fucking had it.

And you're talking to me
about slave labor?

What is Squeeze and them
gonna do about slave labor?

-What does Squeeze have to do with this?
-Huh? They ain't gonna do shit.

And you ain't gonna do shit neither
by selling fucking art to rich people.

Fuck it.

Give me the damn covers!

-What are you...
-Taking them.

-I'm cold.
-I'm not playing, Cassius.

-You're being greedy.
-Don't play with me, Cassius.

You don't even need all those covers.
It's not necessary.

(EXHALES SHARPLY)

The whole reason
I went to work for RegalView

was to make myself
more interesting to you.

(SCOFFS)

Cassius, the old you
was way more interesting.

If you go to work today
at RegalView crossing the picket line,

we're done.

(CROWD PROTESTING)

Assholes and elbows, people! Let's go!

Chisels or dynamite, Cassius. You pick.

(IN WHITE VOICE) Yeah, agreed.

I just have to follow up on this lead
I've been working on.

(SIGHS)

This motherfucker right here

is on fire.

Let's give it up for the boy wonder!

-Huzzah!
-(ALL CHEERING)

(IN WHITE VOICE)
Yeah, yeah! Some for the homies.

And some for me!

Bag them, tag them, rag them!

I trained her. I trained her.

We hunted mammoths! Yay!

MR. ____: Douse him.
Douse our winner with champagne.

PROTESTERS: Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Move!

Get behind the line! Move!

I said, get back!

WOMAN: Have a cola and smile, bitch!

(ALL CLAMORING)

(GROANS)

CASSIUS: (IN WHITE VOICE)
Thank you very much, Miss Welcrott.

I'll talk to you soon.

Mmm-hmm. Okay, bye.

You, my friend,

you are the best decision
I've made in quite a long time.

-I have to pat myself on the ass for that.
-Thank you, Mr. ____.

Feels good to be appreciated.

Don't call me Mr. ____, Cassius.

Call me (BLEEP).

Million-dollar question for you, Cassius.

Do you like to party?

I like parties.

What are you doing tonight?

Oh, I got this thing.

-Well, my girlfriend, ex-girlfriend...
-Mmm.

Fudge all that.

Mmm. Steve Lift is throwing
his yearly party.

Wants to see our new star there.

Wants to talk to you, Cassius.

I've been waiting years for this invite.

Even Jay and Bey can't get this invite.

(CHUCKLES)

Hell, yeah. I just got
to do this other thing.

You go to your other thing,

and I'll be there waiting.
Pick you up.

This is the kind of party
that could change your life.

(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

DETROIT: (IN BRITISH ACCENT)
Beauty, love,

and laughter must be stimulated to thrive

and flourish under almost
any circumstances.

I realize you were asking
about a specific... That one?

Yes, that's interesting.

You know what? Will you please
excuse me just one minute?

(EXHALES)

-Hey.
-(IN NORMAL VOICE) Hey.

I wouldn't miss this for the world.

Um, it's beautiful.

-You're beautiful.
-Cash, I love you, too,

but I can't hang with
what I see in you now.

What happened to your head?

Oh, um, it's nothing.
I was just shaving...

All right, I have to go get
ready for my performance.

You should really stay and see it, okay?

Okay, but I only can stay
for a little while, baby,

'cause there's this party
I got to get back to. It's important.

A slave auctioneers' party?

-Hey.
-Yo, what's up? (CHUCKLES)

DETROIT: Thank you for coming.

I wouldn't miss this for the world.

You always know
just what to say, huh? (LAUGHS)

I literally just said that.

I hope you stay.

SAL: Yo, is the reason why
you don't call me no more

is 'cause you a sell out
or 'cause you're just a star?

What are you talking about?

Eleven million views, man.

What the fuck?

SAL: You're like
the Ariana Grande of disloyal niggas.

WOMAN: Have a cola and smile, bitch!

SQUEEZE: Look.

You could really help us out right now.

We got them by the balls,
but they're holding out.

We got the info on how much
this is costing them.

You flipping sides could turn the tide.

Don't be the leaf
that floats down the river.

Be the stone that splits the stream.

Is that Tupac?

(GONG SOUNDS)

(IN BRITISH ACCENT)
Welcome, friends!

Gather around, form a semi-circle.

Tonight, we will have
a transformative experience.

In those containers,

there are broken cell phones,
used bullet casings,

and water balloons
filled with sheep's blood.

Cell phones can only work
with the mineral coltan,

which is found in Africa's Congo.

The profit involved in this
has created hardship and wars.

I will stand here.

If you feel so moved,

you may throw the items
in the containers at me.

While I'm standing here,
I will be reciting excerpts

from the timeless
Motown-produced movie entitled

The Last Dragon.

I'll recite those lines
Angela says to Eddie Arkadian

as she leaves him.

Let's begin.

"And in the end, Eddie,
you know what?

"You're nothing
but a misguided midget asshole

"with dreams of ruling the world.

"Yeah, and also from Kew Gardens.

"And also getting by on my tits."

WOMAN: Bravo!

-(GASPS)
-(PEOPLE CLAPPING)

"And in the end, Eddie, you know what?

"You're nothing
but a misguided midget asshole

"with dreams of ruling the world.

"And also from Kew Gardens.

"And also getting by on my tits."

(PEOPLE CHEERING)

"And in the end, Eddie, you know what?

"You're nothing but a...

"...misguided midget asshole

"with dreams of ruling the world.

"Yeah, and also from Kew Gardens.

"And also getting by on my tits."

Hey, hey, hey! Stop!

What the fuck is this?

Why would you subject yourself to this?

(IN NORMAL VOICE)
It's a part of the show, Cassius.

You of all people
should understand, right?

-Stick to the script.
-(SIGHS) No.

Don't you have a party to get to, Cash?

Go!

Go, Cash.

(IN BRITISH ACCENT) Let's begin again.

"And in the end, Eddie..."

(SNORTING)

(SIGHS)

Well, I guess you're all wondering
why I've called this meeting.

(ALL CHEERING)

Hey. Hey.

Fucking sexy chocolate motherfucker!

-Oh, yes!
-Cool guy.

You're coming with me.

I know you're loving the new digs.

Or even better,
I'm digging the new loves.

(LAUGHS)

Stick around because, uh,
I think a lot of these bitches

are gonna be getting naked later.

You know, I mean, your parties
are the stuff of folklore.

You got to meet
the man of the hour, though.

(IN WHITE VOICE) Hey, Cassius Green.
It's a pleasure to meet you.

An honor even, sir.

(STAMMERS) It's okay.
He's friendly. He's friendly.

-Yeah. How you doing, man? You all right?
-I'm really well, thank you.

Thank you for inviting us, Mr. Lift.
It's amazing.

Just don't call me "mister."

Oh, uh, Steve?

I never said "Steve."

Sir.

-I'm fucking kidding with you, man.
-Oh. Ow!

You can call me whatever you want,
you keep closing those deals.

-(CHUCKLES)
-You must be like a fucking genius.

I'd love to pick your brain

because we need people
like you at WorryFree.

People who can comprehend
the big picture, you know?

It's people like you
that are gonna save this nation, Green.

I mean, look, don't get me wrong.

We still need the workers
to do the work. Per se.

But we also need people like you.

People that can be trusted.

People that can analyze
the challenge and adapt.

Like a cunning raccoon.

Like a snake.
Or like a tardigrade.

Thanks.

Go, I'll lock up.

WOMAN: Great performance tonight, D.

(CHUCKLING) I told you,
you didn't have to do that.

No, it's my pleasure.
It was good.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

So, you gonna tell me what you
thought about the show now?

(SMACKS LIPS) It was, uh,

fiery.

Fiery? What the fuck?

-That's what you thought? That's it?
-It was fiery. It was great.

All right. Shh.
You can tell me later.

So now, I gotta climb over
the side of this overturned jeep

'cause I got to pry the AK out
from under the crushed, bloody body

of my now inconveniently
deceased guide, right?

And just as I get this thing out,
I spin around.

And this fucking thing starts
to charge and it got a...

(IMITATING AUTOMATIC GUNFIRE)

Fucker took two mags to the head.

Turned that bitch into a trophy.

What about you, Cash?

You ever had to bust a cap
in anybody's ass?

(LAUGHS) Oh, Green, no.

Shut the fuck up (BLEEP).

I'm talking to the man of the hour here.

Come on, man. Have a seat.

Come on.

I want to hear about
some of that Oakland gangster shit, man.

-Oaktown.
-Just right here?

-Just sit down?
-Yeah.

Well, uh... (SIGHS)

Luckily, I have not had
to put a cap in anyone's ass.

Or head or anything.

Uh, so, I don't have
any cool stories, sorry.

All right, well, I mean...
Give us something. Right?

These boring cunts
are at every single one of my parties.

You're different, man.
Make an impression.

At least take off the white voice.

And I know you can bust a rap, right?

(IN NORMAL VOICE)
No, actually I can't.

Bullshit. Come on. Bullshit.

I can't, man. I mean, I can listen
to rap well, but I just can't rap.

-It's actually embarrassing.
-I don't know. I think he's lying.

I think you can rap.

I think you should rap.

Rap! Rap! Rap!

ALL: (CHANTING)
Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap!

Rap! Rap! Rap!

Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap!

Rap! Rap! Rap!

Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap! Rap!

(RAPPING) My name is Cash
I like to...

MAN: Smash!

Um...

I come from the land of dope

Um...

Somebody got something to smoke?

Nigga shit
Nigga shit

Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit
Nigga shit

Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit

Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

-Nigga shit, nigga shit
-Yeah!

Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

-Yeah!
-Nigga shit, nigga shit

Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

Nigga shit, nigga shit
Nigga, nigga, nigga shit

(ALL CHEERING)

(MOANING)

(WOMEN CONTINUE MOANING)

Go through that big-ass foyer.

Go through the door next to the stairs.

Go down the other stairs.
Hang a left.

Go to the end of the hallway.

Then make a right.

You'll see it.

Big magenta-colored doors
at the end of the hall.

Steve Lift will be waiting for you.
He wants you in there.

Look here, youngblood.

We don't cry about the shit
that should be.

We just thrive on what is and what is...
(SNAPS FINGERS) Opportunity.

This could be big, Cassius.

Don't do that thing.

-What thing?
-That thing where you fuck it up.

Clean yourself up.

(ALL LAUGHING)

(SIGHS)

Heads up.

This place is fucking nuts, man.

Thank you. I will accept
your backhanded compliment.

Please. Take a seat, Mr. Cassius Green.

(SIGHING)

-STEVE: How's your head? You all right?
-No, it's perfect.

Well, here, in this lair
we do no line before its time.

And for you, my friend, it is time.

Because you are rolling

-with the big dogs now.
-(LAUGHING SOFTLY)

Fuck it!

(SNORTING)

-Ah! Fuck! It's strong, man.
-Mmm-hmm.

Oh, yeah. I have a proposition
for you, Cash.

And I want to listen
to your proposition, Stevie.

I want you at WorryFree.

I see something in you.

I think that you are more

than just the world's
greatest telemarketer since "Hal Jameson."

You know what? That's very interesting.
Boring, though.

I want to talk about the dollars
and zeros and the commas and shit.

-Cocky. I like it.
-(CHUCKLES)

Watch this little video proposal
we put together

and you'll understand everything.
All right?

(VIDEO PLAYING)

You know, I kind of got to piss.

Could we, like, watch this
after I get back from the bathroom?

No.

Hella gotta piss, man.

Okay, fine. Out the door,

halfway down the hallway,
jade door.

Jade door, okay. (EXHALES)

(SHUDDERS)

Okay, uh...

(CLEARS THROAT) Okay.

Wow. All right.

Serious?

One stall. All right.

Hey, uh, you on your way
in or out, man?

MAN: Can you help me?

No. No, I can't. Sorry.

Please. Could you help me?

(CRYING) Fucked up, man.
I'm really hurt.

Oh, shit. Uh...

Okay.

Just hold on, man.

(SCREAMS)

(WHIMPERING)

-Please, help me.
-Fuck!

Help me! Help me! (SCREAMING)

(HOWLING)

No, no, no, no, no, no!
Don't touch me.

-Help us! Help us!
-Help me!

ALL: (YELLING) Please! Please!

(GRUNTS)

Hey, dumb fuck.

What the fuck, man!

-I said the jade door.
-That is the jade door.

No, that's an olive door.

That's very clearly an olive door.
That's a jade door.

Look, you got to get me
the fuck out of here.

Okay, calm, calm.
This is a big misunderstanding. Okay?

Let's just take a deep breath
and calm down.

We're gonna go back to my office.

I'm gonna explain
everything to you, all right?

Wait, do you still have to pee?

I mean, I pissed on myself, man.

-So, no, I don't have to pee.
-(LAUGHING)

-Look, I got to get the fuck out of here.
-No, no, no, no, no, no.

Here's the deal.

I can't let you leave
without explaining everything. All right?

And if you'd even seen the video

before you went in there,
you wouldn't even be scared.

What the fuck was
that thing in there, man?

It's...

The video is gonna show you everything.
Don't worry about it.

There's a lot of production value in this.

(BIRDS CHIRPING)

Since the dawn of time,

or least since before
anyone cares to remember,

we have used our wits to survive.

(GRUNTING)

But what has allowed us
to thrive was our use of tools.

A natural development.

But what are tools if not
extensions of the appendages

with which we were born?

Humans have modified ourselves
throughout history.

-We train ourselves to fight.
-(GRUNTS)

-We work out.
-(MAN STRAINING)

We study.

WorryFree is carrying forward
this lineage

of natural developments
that began in prehistoric times.

We realize that human labor
has its limitations.

And so, our scientists
have discovered a way.

A chemical change
to make humans stronger,

more obedient, more durable,

and therefore more efficient
and profitable.

We are proud to announce
to our shareholders

that a new day in human
productivity is dawning.

Our workforce of Equisapiens
will make WorryFree

the most profitable company
in human history.

And you, our shareholders,
will be a part of that history.

See? It's all just a big
misunderstanding.

This ain't no fucking
misunderstanding, man!

So, you making half-human,
half-horse fucking things

so you can make more money?

Yeah, basically.

I just didn't want you
to think I was crazy.

That I was doing this for no reason.

Because this isn't irrational.

Oh.

Cool. All right. Cool.
No, I understand.

(STAMMERS) I just got to leave now, man.

-So, please get the fuck out of my way.
-We haven't finished the movie.

Call me about that next week, please,
and then we'll talk about it.

Sit in that chair,

and we're gonna watch this movie.

And then I'm gonn
make you a proposal.

Come on. (PATTING CHAIR)

(VIDEO PLAYING)

NARRATOR:
Our worker modification process

is simple and rather quick.

It works for 70% of humans
who take the fusing catalyst.

STEVE: And, see, this is how we begin
the process of the transformation.

They take what's called the fusing
catalyst, and what happens is...

Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait a minute, man.

What the fuck did you
give me to snort? Huh?

What the fuck was that?

-Wait, what?
-What did I snort?

'Cause I'm not even fucking high.

You're not what?
Wait, wait, wait. Wait.

No, I don't give a fuck
about that anymore, all right?

I don't give a fuck about that shit.

If you had me snort some shit
that's gonna have me mutated, man,

I want you to fucking shoot me!

Cash. What you snorted
was 100% Peruvian, man.

I need you to be a little bit
more particular, man.

You know, they got fucking
horses in Peru, probably.

-Motherfucker!
-You're gonna get semantic on me?

No, I'm not getting semantic.
You're the one that's being semantic

if you refer to the fucking horses
as a 100%...

Fuck that. It doesn't even matter.
Was it coke? Was it not coke?

-What was it?
-Cash. It was coke.

Calm down, man.

You're... I wouldn't just give you
the fusing catalyst without telling you.

I'm not evil. Okay?

The reason you're not high

is because your adrenaline
is pumping so hard right now

that, to be perfectly honest,

you're starting to harsh
both of our mellows. Okay?

So, sit down and just take a breath, man.
It's fucking adrenaline.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

-Okay.
-It's fine. Just breathe. Okay?

(EXHALES DEEPLY)
This is fucking weird shit.

Okay?

Now, the proposal that
I want to make you is this...

That is the future of labor. Okay?

They're bigger. They're stronger.

They hopefully gripe a lot less.

And also, soon I'm gonna
have millions of them.

Fucking crazy...

They're gonna form their own society.

They'll probably form their own culture,
then maybe they want to organize.

Maybe they want to rebel.

And that's why we need
someone on the inside

who represents WorryFree's needs.

Someone they can relate to.

Talking about a manager
for fucking horse people.

No. No.

The Equisapien Martin Luther King, Jr.

But one that we create.

One that we control.

So, you want to...
You want to have a false leader

for these fucking horse people,

but, at the same time,
he works for you?

Yeah. Keeps shit simple.

Well, why the fuck did you choose me?

Out of everybody you could have chosen,
why did you pick me?

-For what?
-Cash. Cash.

You are awesome.

I've never seen anyone
go through the ranks

at RegalView like you did. Hmm?

And I want someone
like that at WorryFree.

Someone hungry.

Someone who'll fucking shank
their own friend in the back

if it means getting what they want.

Now, look, I can see
that you're freaked out.

And that you want to say no.

But I wouldn't do that before
you see what I'm offering.

No, man. No, no.

There's no fucking amount of money
that will make me do that shit.

Two things.

One, it's a short-term contract.

Five years. Done.

Then we give you the diffuser antidote

special sauce serum,
and you're back to normal.

And the second one,
and I want you to remember this.

You're gonna have a horse cock.

What the fuck is a special
antidote sauce serum? What the...

It sounds like you made
that shit up, man. That shit ain't real.

No, it's real.
And so is my offer.

Five years as our man amongst horses

for $100 million.

Just go sleep on it. Okay?

And after that, holla at your boy. Okay?

Get out in that party
and go fuck something.

(GRUNTS SOFTLY)

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Fuck! Fuck!

(MOUTHING NUMBERS)

Where's my cell phone?

(DIAL TONE)

(KEYPAD BEEPING)

(LINE RINGING)

WOMAN: San Francisco Chronicle.
Good morning.

-Um, Eric. Eric Arnold, please.
-One moment.

ERIC: Hello.

Uh, okay, um, Eric Arnold.
My name is Cassius Green.

I have some important information.

Some very, very important information

that I think you would really,
really be interested in.

-Oh, shoot.
-Okay, all right.

They turning motherfuckers
into horse people.

Horse... Half-horse,
half-human people that work. All right.

Look, they have you snort
some fucking coke,

and... Well, it's not really coke,

but you snort it,
and it has your nostrils get all big,

and then you get a horse dick and shit.

And listen, you got to get
this story out here, man,

because you could...

Jake?

What you talking about?
No. Cassius.

Cassius Green.

(CALL DISCONNECTS)

The first thing we're gonna
do is cut a little nib into the cola can.

Voilà! "Have a cola and smile, bitch" wig!

-Fuck! Where the fuck is my cell phone?
-(WOMAN ON TV LAUGHING)

REPORTER: (ON TV) And the strangest thing
to happen in advertising history

Soda Cola has announced
working with Cynthia Rose,

the foul-mouthed heroine
with perfect aim

from the
"Cola And Smile Bitch" YouTube clip.

Rose reportedly signed
for an amount of money

that could buy four white babies.

The strike breaker
who's hilariously pegged in that clip

has been revealed to be named

-Cassius Green.
-Cassius Green?

All right, Doc, now I'm...

I got a little worried, you know.

Because I was looking at it
maybe from up here.

But that it might be different.

Is it bigger?

No. No, it's the same size.

I mean, I'm glad
you're feeling yourself.

Is that why you tried to
booty call me last night?

I didn't try to booty call you.
I lost my phone. I told you.

It doesn't matter.
I got a new one.

What is up with you, Cash?

You called me at 3:23.
You left a video message.

I didn't check it,
'cause I assumed it was lewd

as fuck and I wasn't
trying to do that...

Can I see that?

Come on.

We're hurting! We're hurting!

-Help us! Help us!
-(ALARM BLARING)

MAN: Get back in there.
Get in there.

EQUISAPIENS: Please help us!

(SCREAMS) We're hurting!

ELECTRONIC VOICE:
Security code cleared.

STEVE: Love of Christ.

If you beautiful perversions
don't shut the fuck up,

I will turn you all to glue.

Found my phone.

-I don't know, Cash.
-(CRYING)

You got to do something.
People got to know.

Right? I mean, you got
to tell them, right?

Yeah, I mean...

-Why did you...
-I don't know, all right?

I snorted something that was...
I thought it was activator,

but it turned out it was just coke.

But why did you focus
on your dick, though?

They have big nostrils.

You could have just asked me
to check your nostrils.

-Okay, check them, check them.
-Okay, okay.

Yeah, they look bigger.

-No, they don't.
-I think that's just cause...

-Yeah. You're flaring them.
-(CRYING) No, I'm not flaring them.

-You are, you are.
-No, I'm not.

Just relax them a little bit,
so I can see.

-Okay. Look, listen. They're normal size.
-(SOBBING)

They look normal size.
They look normal size.

I need you to know...
I want to be clear.

This can't happen again.

I'm not going back.

I'm not going to be
a fucking Power Caller.

That's a good decision.
But I...

-I still have problems with all this.
-I'm not...

Only something happening
to you turned you against them.

Okay. But I know how they view me.
How I look in the eyes

of fucking WorryFree and RegalView.

They just view me
as another one of their

fucking creatures
to control and to manipulate.

And that's not me.

Good.

Good.

(GRUNTS) But that doesn't change
what I said about us.

And also, I kind of messed around
with somebody last night.

What? Wait.

What do you mean you kind of...

I need you to explain that one
'cause I don't understand

what you mean by you kind of
messed around with somebody.

What is it?

-I mean, did you...
-Everything but.

Everything but.
You see, that's almost worse

than anything I can imagine in my mind.

Everything but. So, did you...

Cassius, we are broken up.

Okay? It's over.

It's me and you that shouldn't
have messed around tonight.

(SIGHS)

You want to know who it was?

Do you plan on fucking

or everything butting
with that person again?

No.

Nah. No, I don't want to know, then.

No. No, I don't want to know.

(INDISTINCT YELLING)

MAN: I have absolutely
no idea what this is about.

Maybe it's saying that
capitalism dehumanizes them.

Maybe the artist is being literal.

Maybe WorryFree is turning
workers into horses.

And literally fucking them?

(HORN HONKING)

Hey, bro, ain't you the dude from the clip

that got hit in the head
with the can? (LAUGHING)

No. No, everybody thinks that's me, man.

-But that's not me.
-What's wrong with your head then?

-(LAUGHING)
-Damn, everybody thinks that's me.

That's you. That shit is funny!

-What the fuck, man?
-Why you lying?

-(GRUNTS)
-(MEN JEERING)

MAN: That's all right.
Happen to the best of us.

(MEN LAUGHING)

Walk it off.

(DIALING)

(LINE RINGING)

This is Cassius Green
from "Have a cola and smile bitch!" fame.

I want to be on your show tomorrow.

(SINGING)
Have a cola and smile, bitch

Have a cola and smile, bitch

Have a cola and smile, bitch

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)

AUDIENCE: I got the shit
kicked out of me!

Today, YouTube sensation
Cassius Green is here.

You had 500 million people
watch you get pegged in the noggin

and get utterly humiliated.
It was effing hilarious.

-The way your hand went up like that.
-(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

The whole world was laughing
till they pissed.

Well, I got a new clip
that I need you to play

and the only reason
I came on the show

was because you agreed to show
this clip to your 150 million viewers.

Well, if you want some ass,
you have to bring some ass.

So, get ready for an ass-whupping,

then jump in the shit tank,
then we'll play your clip.

(GRUNTING)

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

Could you play my clip now, please?

(LAUGHING) Okay. Is it as crazy
as the "Cola And A Smile Bitch" clip?

Not possible.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

(SHUDDERING) It's crazy, Mary.

It's fucking crazy.

MARY: Whoo-hoo!
Let's roll the clip.

Help us. We're hurting!

We're hurting!

If you beautiful perversions
don't shut the fuck up,

I will turn you all to glue.

(AUDIENCE GASPING)

As a Power Caller for RegalView,
WorryFree was my premiere client.

This is just incontrovertible proof
of WorryFree's evil practices.

They're turning humans
into grotesque horse-people.

And I want the world to know

that they're manipulating
humanity for the sake of profit.

Now, we cannot let this go on.

You have to call your
congressman, all right?

Call your local politicians

and let them know
we will not stand for this.

REPORTER: It's been one day

since the viral celebrity
leaked to the world

new scientific achievements
made by WorryFree

and their genius CEO,
Steve Lift,

which caused WorryFree
stocks to skyrocket

at a rate faster than
any other company in history.

House and Senate leaders
joined Lift in ringing the bell

to celebrate the record
stock market rally

-WorryFree's success has created.
-Fuck you!

We are all sinners,
but in every sinner lies a winner.

The Lord saved you
from the whorehouse,

you from the flophouse,
you from the drop house.

(MAN CONTINUES TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

-Stop! Stop!
-Out, devil!

Stop!

SQUEEZE: No, no.
We're just doing dutch.

(SIGHS DEEPLY)

-Thanks for calling, man.
-Yeah. (SIGHS)

Look, I betrayed you.

I know it's not gonna change anything,
but I wanted to say I'm sorry.

-I acted stupid, I was...
-Man, hey, we good.

All right,
but all you got to do is just...

Just do right from now on, man.

Yeah, I know, and that's what...

I tried to change it.
I tried to stop it. But it's...

It's just right in front of their faces.

They're turning human beings
into monstrosities

and nobody gives a fuck.

Most people that saw you
on that screen

knew calling their congressman
wasn't gonna do shit.

If you get shown a problem,
but have no idea how to control it,

then you just decide to get
used to the problem.

Yeah, and that's why
our plan for tomorrow

is important.

'Cause if we stop them from crossing
the picket line this time, we win.

-That's a good plan.
-Yeah.

Tomorrow we show them
how to give fucks.

(PEOPLE HOOTING)

Ain't that about a blip.

-WOMAN: Happy Halloween!
-Look at that shit. You see that shit?

What the fuck is that about?
What the fuck, man?

That's what I'm talking about.

-MAN IN VIDEO: Get back in there!
-We're hurting! Help us!

(KEYPAD BEEPING)

-(LOCK OPENS)
-ELECTRONIC VOICE: Security code cleared.

PROTESTERS: Fuck you, RegalView!

Fuck you, RegalView!
Fuck you, RegalView!

None of the strikers here
at the RegalView strike

will tell us why they're all wearing
their "Cola And Smile Bitch" wigs.

Although the strikers have been

extremely militant over the past weeks,

they've not been able to stop
the Stackwater juggernaut

from breaking through the lines.

PROTESTERS: Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Elbows and assholes, people!
Let's go!

PROTESTERS: Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!

-Scabs won't pass!
-(CLAMORING)

Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!
Scabs won't pass!

Scabs won't pass!

-(PROTESTERS CONTINUE CHANTING)
-(ALL GRUNT)

Oh!

(ALL CHEERING)

-REPORTER: The infamous Cassius Green,
-(SHOUTING)

former Power Caller
and strike line crosser,

has switched sides.

-Yeah, man!
-Yeah!

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(ALL GRUNTING)

Looks like the cavalry's arrived, folks.

(PEOPLE SCREAMING)

(GRUNTS)

Get the fuck back!

This way! This way!

Come on!

(PEOPLE CONTINUE SCREAMING)

CASSIUS: Over here! Over here!

This is when the magic happens.

-(KEYPAD BEEPING)
-SQUEEZE: Get them here quick.

(WHISTLE BLOWING)

MAN: Hey, Cassius.

(DISTANT CLAMORING)

(GROANS SOFTLY)

-(SCREAMING)
-(BLOWS LANDING)

MAN: Look out!

CASSIUS: Hey! Hey!

(WOMAN GROANS)

Let me out!

Hey!

(THUDDING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(ENGINE REVVING)

(METAL CREAKING)

MAN: Hold your ground!

CASSIUS: (LAUGHING) Yes! Yes!

(LOUD BANG)

(BLOWS LANDING)

(MEN GRUNTING)

(MAN SCREAMING)

(METAL SCRAPING)

(HEAVY CLANKING)

(EXCLAIMS)

Thank you.

We are honored to be in your presence.

Dude. I'm from East Oakland.

Talk regular.
My name is DeMarius.

Thanks for breaking us out.

Oh, I'm Cassius. Cassius Green.

No problem.

(HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING)

WorryFree is here.

Hey. Same struggle.

Same fight.

Mmm-hmm.

Equisapiens! Let's be out!

-(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
-(CHEERING)

WOMAN: Equisapiens, thank you so much!

Hey!

Mastermind.

(LAUGHS)

(LAUGHING)

(CHUCKLES)

Are you serious right now?

Serious as kicking the can, man.

Don't play with me, Cash,
'cause that's some serious shit.

No, man. That's yours.

And I've got a car
that'll do me just fine

till I get back to work at RegalView.

(SIGHS)

Plus, I wanted to say I'm sorry.

Cash, man. Look.

Just saying sorry is fine.

This is good. This is perfect.
This is the perfect apology.

I don't want to disrespect you.
You know, this is cool, I'm...

Hey!

So, uh...

Now that we won that strike,
you cool with coming back to work with us

-lowly regular telemarketers?
-(CHUCKLING)

Well, if the new and
glorious telemarketers union will have me.

You got to start fighting somewhere.

-Hmm?
-All right, bro.

-Be good.
-Mmm-hmm.

Kiss already, y'all.

-(CAR DOOR CLOSES)
-(ENGINE REVS)

So, what about being a part
of something important, huh?

(GASPS) Oh, shit.
It looks like the sun is about to explode.

-Oh, my God.
-Come here, sugar.

We are a part of something important.

Changing the world.

Before the sun explodes.

Well, I couldn't come back
to the exact same thing

after all that, right?

-(CASSIUS GROANING)
-What happened?

What, Cash?

(CONTINUES GROANING)

(PHONE RINGING)

(PHONE CONTINUES RINGING)

(GRUNTS) What?

I'm Cassius Green calling on behalf of
stomp-a-mud -hole-in-your-ass.com.

Sorry to bother you, but...

(DISTANT THUDDING)

(ALARM BLARING)

(ROARS)

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)