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1
00:00:13,266 --> 00:00:15,306
[Trilling]
2
00:00:21,826 --> 00:00:26,826
[Screams]
3
00:00:59,387 --> 00:01:06,826
[Screams]
4
00:01:06,826 --> 00:01:09,227
[Trilling]
5
00:01:09,227 --> 00:01:09,826
[Screams]
6
00:01:13,426 --> 00:01:15,466
[Screams]
7
00:01:37,826 --> 00:01:42,027
[Screams]
8
00:01:46,146 --> 00:01:51,586
[Thudding footsteps]
9
00:01:52,066 --> 00:01:57,786
[Screams]
10
00:02:01,027 --> 00:02:03,146
[Roaring]
11
00:02:03,146 --> 00:02:04,826
[Screams]
12
00:02:14,586 --> 00:02:18,729
You're about to hear one of
the strangest stories in
military history.
13
00:02:18,787 --> 00:02:20,466
I know because it
happened to me...
14
00:02:20,466 --> 00:02:22,026
Captain Jason Briggs.
15
00:02:22,026 --> 00:02:24,306
Army career man
for 23 years.
16
00:02:24,306 --> 00:02:25,787
No visible scars.
17
00:02:25,787 --> 00:02:30,787
At least, until that day we
were flying some 30,000 feet
over a very empty section...
18
00:02:30,787 --> 00:02:32,906
of the blue Pacific.
19
00:02:33,387 --> 00:02:36,026
Along for the ride was
Sergeant Ben Healey.
20
00:02:36,026 --> 00:02:38,546
My second in command since I
was stationed in Seoul.
21
00:02:38,546 --> 00:02:40,146
A good tough man...
22
00:02:40,146 --> 00:02:43,026
but a royal pain in the ass,
sometimes.
23
00:02:44,866 --> 00:02:47,626
Corporal Buzz Branegan was
up front at the controls...
24
00:02:47,626 --> 00:02:50,746
helping me escort three
of the sorriest excuses
for soldiers...
25
00:02:50,746 --> 00:02:52,826
it had ever been my
displeasure to meet.
26
00:02:53,667 --> 00:02:55,306
Private Wilbert
Turbowski...
27
00:02:55,306 --> 00:02:57,387
or Turbo as the
others called him.
28
00:02:57,387 --> 00:03:01,466
To me, he was just another
prisoner headed to military
court in San Diego.
29
00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,786
They said Private Wayne
Kincaid was the Brain...
30
00:03:04,786 --> 00:03:07,266
but the kid looked as
lost as his cohorts.
31
00:03:07,266 --> 00:03:11,026
Like Turbo he was facing
charges for going AWOL.
32
00:03:11,526 --> 00:03:13,426
And finally there
was Skeemer.
33
00:03:13,426 --> 00:03:16,866
A pathetic shiftless recruit
who certainly lived up
to his name.
34
00:03:17,106 --> 00:03:19,507
According to the report
from Honolulu Command...
35
00:03:19,507 --> 00:03:22,786
he was the mastermind behind
the theft of the tank that
got Turbo...
36
00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:24,866
and the Brain in hot water.
37
00:03:24,866 --> 00:03:28,466
Little did we know that we
all about to find ourselves
in hot water...
38
00:03:28,466 --> 00:03:30,227
with little hope
for survival.
39
00:03:31,266 --> 00:03:32,186
SARGE:
Captain! What's going on?
40
00:03:32,186 --> 00:03:34,826
BUZZ:
Better strap it in back
there guys, we're going
to have to ditch!
41
00:03:40,947 --> 00:03:41,826
What the heck!
42
00:03:41,826 --> 00:03:42,866
What is it?
43
00:05:51,786 --> 00:05:54,067
Please God! Let
it be Club Med!
44
00:05:54,426 --> 00:05:56,146
I wouldn't get your
hopes up John...
45
00:05:56,146 --> 00:05:58,026
according to the map this
place doesn't even exist.
46
00:05:58,986 --> 00:06:00,466
What are you
saying Lieutenant?
47
00:06:01,947 --> 00:06:05,306
What I'm saying is, this island
is completely uncharted.
48
00:06:07,346 --> 00:06:09,706
Well men we made it back
to good old terra firma...
49
00:06:09,706 --> 00:06:11,226
no matter what
your charts say.
50
00:06:11,226 --> 00:06:12,306
Hey Cap look!
51
00:06:12,306 --> 00:06:13,466
It's our stuff!
52
00:06:13,466 --> 00:06:14,866
How'd it get here?
53
00:06:14,866 --> 00:06:16,786
Same way we did,
that weird current.
54
00:06:16,786 --> 00:06:17,826
What do we do now sir?
55
00:06:17,826 --> 00:06:19,546
First things first.
56
00:06:19,546 --> 00:06:22,106
Let's see what kind of
supplies survived the crash.
57
00:06:22,106 --> 00:06:24,466
Hopefully there's
something we can use.
58
00:06:36,226 --> 00:06:37,507
Hey we got a
first aid kit!
59
00:06:38,226 --> 00:06:39,986
And K-rations!
60
00:06:40,786 --> 00:06:41,906
And weapons!
61
00:06:43,666 --> 00:06:44,507
And Playpen.
62
00:06:44,507 --> 00:06:46,466
This is something
we can really use.
63
00:06:46,666 --> 00:06:48,426
CAPTAIN:
Here's what I've
been looking for.
64
00:06:48,426 --> 00:06:49,426
Transmitter!
65
00:06:49,426 --> 00:06:50,586
Think it still works?
66
00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:53,387
The batteries
are still okay.
67
00:06:59,346 --> 00:07:00,146
Hey look!
68
00:07:01,026 --> 00:07:01,947
What?
69
00:07:02,146 --> 00:07:03,786
I thought I
saw something.
70
00:07:03,866 --> 00:07:04,466
BRAIN:
Where?
71
00:07:04,466 --> 00:07:06,067
Well, there! In the cave.
72
00:07:07,106 --> 00:07:08,026
CAPTAIN:
What was it?
73
00:07:08,426 --> 00:07:10,186
TURBO:
I'm not sure.
74
00:07:10,186 --> 00:07:12,507
SARGE:
Whatever it was,
I'll flush it out.
75
00:07:12,507 --> 00:07:14,067
CAPTAIN:
Hold it sergeant!
76
00:07:14,067 --> 00:07:16,306
CAPTAIN:
We're too low on ammo
for you to waste it.
77
00:07:16,306 --> 00:07:18,106
CAPTAIN: That's an order.
SARGE: Yes sir.
78
00:07:18,586 --> 00:07:20,106
CAPTAIN:
What did this thing
look like, Private?
79
00:07:21,026 --> 00:07:22,466
I know it's gonna
sound crazy...
80
00:07:22,466 --> 00:07:24,387
but it looked like a...
81
00:07:26,466 --> 00:07:28,507
Nah... it couldn't
have been.
82
00:07:28,507 --> 00:07:30,586
Must be my imagination.
83
00:07:32,387 --> 00:07:33,466
Kincaid!
84
00:07:33,746 --> 00:07:34,746
Yes Captain.
85
00:07:34,746 --> 00:07:36,067
How's Buzz?
86
00:07:36,186 --> 00:07:37,947
Why don't you
ask him sir?
87
00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:45,306
How ya doin' soldier?
88
00:07:45,306 --> 00:07:46,586
A-OK Cap.
89
00:07:46,786 --> 00:07:48,426
BUZZ:
Just one thing.
90
00:07:48,426 --> 00:07:49,306
What?
91
00:07:49,306 --> 00:07:50,986
Sure could
use a smoke.
92
00:07:52,466 --> 00:07:53,546
Here you go buddy.
93
00:08:00,746 --> 00:08:02,146
What are his chances?
94
00:08:02,986 --> 00:08:04,466
Not good.
95
00:08:04,466 --> 00:08:06,466
We've got to move him inland,
get him out of the sun.
96
00:08:06,906 --> 00:08:10,026
Yeah. Private!
Grab some weapons.
97
00:08:10,026 --> 00:08:11,826
CAPTAIN:
Healey! Give us a hand.
98
00:08:26,346 --> 00:08:28,626
CAPTAIN:
Let's move around
that point.
99
00:08:33,026 --> 00:08:34,586
CAPTAIN:
We're going to have to
go in the drink again.
100
00:08:34,586 --> 00:08:37,026
CAPTAIN:
Come on let's
hustle it up.
101
00:08:37,026 --> 00:08:40,026
CAPTAIN:
Kincaid, I want you do find
a lookout. Here take this.
102
00:08:40,026 --> 00:08:41,067
BRAIN:
Right Captain.
103
00:08:41,067 --> 00:08:42,026
CAPTAIN:
Come on let's go.
104
00:08:44,586 --> 00:08:47,586
BRAIN:
It's all clear.
Bring her around.
105
00:09:10,947 --> 00:09:11,947
Wayne...
106
00:09:11,947 --> 00:09:14,826
stay here with Buzz and
do what you can for him.
107
00:09:14,826 --> 00:09:18,106
We'll scout around and see
if we can find something
to make a stretcher.
108
00:09:18,106 --> 00:09:19,307
Let's go.
109
00:09:39,266 --> 00:09:41,266
Strange looking trees.
110
00:09:41,266 --> 00:09:42,947
TURBO:
Never seen
anything like 'em.
111
00:09:42,947 --> 00:09:44,466
SARGE:
Probably poisonous.
112
00:09:44,466 --> 00:09:46,307
SKEEMER:
Why don't you take a
bite and find out Sarge.
113
00:09:46,307 --> 00:09:48,146
SARGE:
Why don't you bite
my ass Skeemer!
114
00:09:48,146 --> 00:09:49,906
You know, according
to my map...
115
00:09:49,906 --> 00:09:53,826
the spot we're looking for
should be right over here.
116
00:09:53,826 --> 00:09:55,986
Is everything a
joke to you son?
117
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:57,346
Just my career sir.
118
00:09:57,346 --> 00:09:59,506
It won't be after
this mission.
119
00:09:59,506 --> 00:10:00,466
Ha!
120
00:10:09,986 --> 00:10:11,947
SKEEMER:
How much farther
are we going?
121
00:10:12,266 --> 00:10:15,666
CAPTAIN:
Why did you join this man's
army in the first place?
All you do is bitch!
122
00:10:15,666 --> 00:10:18,427
SKEEMER:
I thought it would be more
like Hogan's Heroes or F Troop.
123
00:10:18,427 --> 00:10:21,386
SKEEMER: Besides, I
heard you get laid a lot.
TURBO: You do!?
124
00:10:34,226 --> 00:10:38,307
Captain, are you sure
arming these men is
such a good idea?
125
00:10:38,307 --> 00:10:39,706
They are under house arrest.
126
00:10:39,706 --> 00:10:41,706
There's no telling
what we'll run into.
127
00:10:41,706 --> 00:10:43,746
TURBO:
Captain, can we
take a break?
128
00:10:43,746 --> 00:10:45,786
CAPTAIN:
What's your problem now?
129
00:10:45,786 --> 00:10:47,746
I gotta go to the can.
130
00:10:47,866 --> 00:10:49,906
Fall out men.
131
00:10:50,466 --> 00:10:53,506
Fall down is more like it.
132
00:10:55,386 --> 00:10:59,786
CAPTAIN: Have you
got any water left?
SARGE: No.
133
00:11:20,986 --> 00:11:22,307
Haaa!
134
00:11:22,308 --> 00:11:23,746
TURBO:
Captain!
135
00:11:23,746 --> 00:11:25,586
On your feet men.
Stay alert.
136
00:11:25,586 --> 00:11:27,826
Five bucks says he caught
himself in his zipper.
137
00:11:27,826 --> 00:11:33,866
Captain! Oh Captain!
Captain! Oh Captain!
138
00:11:38,586 --> 00:11:41,226
You gotta problem with
your privates Private?
139
00:11:43,106 --> 00:11:44,786
I saw her again.
140
00:11:44,786 --> 00:11:45,386
SARGE:
Her!?
141
00:11:45,386 --> 00:11:48,106
And this time I'm sure,
I swear Captain.
142
00:11:48,106 --> 00:11:49,947
I saw a girl!
143
00:11:49,947 --> 00:11:51,466
A girl!?
144
00:11:51,466 --> 00:11:54,546
And what a girl!
She had...
145
00:11:54,546 --> 00:11:56,226
Hands?
146
00:11:56,226 --> 00:11:57,986
No not hands!
147
00:11:57,986 --> 00:12:00,986
She didn't have
hands? Gross.
148
00:12:00,986 --> 00:12:05,506
Private, are you sure you
never hit or head when
the plane crashed?
149
00:12:06,706 --> 00:12:09,067
You ask me, he's bucking
for a section eight.
150
00:12:09,067 --> 00:12:11,986
Section eight is great idea.
Why didn't I think of that?
151
00:12:11,986 --> 00:12:14,226
'Cos you're stupid
not crazy.
152
00:12:14,226 --> 00:12:15,986
I knew there
was a reason.
153
00:12:15,986 --> 00:12:16,906
TURBO:
Ssh!
154
00:12:16,906 --> 00:12:18,427
Hear that?
155
00:12:18,746 --> 00:12:20,947
CAPTAIN: Hear what?
TURBO: That noise!
156
00:12:20,947 --> 00:12:22,466
Now he's hearing things.
157
00:12:23,466 --> 00:12:25,146
It sounds like water!
158
00:12:25,146 --> 00:12:29,386
You know, I remember
seeing some water on
the way in here. Yeah.
159
00:12:29,386 --> 00:12:31,626
Those aren't waves
crashing Skeemer.
160
00:12:32,826 --> 00:12:34,346
Sounds more like splashing.
161
00:12:36,826 --> 00:12:38,427
It's coming from over there.
162
00:12:38,427 --> 00:12:40,466
Get your stuff.
163
00:13:02,386 --> 00:13:05,307
SKEEMER: Yabba dabba do.
TURBO: What did I tell ya!
164
00:13:05,307 --> 00:13:08,067
Girls I saw the strangest
ape type creatures...
165
00:13:08,067 --> 00:13:10,187
and they came up out
of the ocean.
166
00:13:10,866 --> 00:13:14,426
SKEEMER: Check out the
hooters on those babes!
TURBO: This beats K-rations!
167
00:13:14,666 --> 00:13:16,146
[Gunshots]
168
00:13:16,146 --> 00:13:17,106
What the hell was that?
169
00:13:17,106 --> 00:13:19,146
All right, back to the
beach double time!
170
00:13:20,266 --> 00:13:21,586
There they are now!
171
00:13:21,586 --> 00:13:22,786
Come on, let's go.
172
00:13:24,226 --> 00:13:26,106
BRAIN:
Make a run for it Buzz!
173
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:39,506
[Screams]
174
00:13:48,506 --> 00:13:50,187
SKEEMER:
Holy shit!
175
00:13:51,226 --> 00:13:52,986
CAPTAIN:
Come on, let's go!
176
00:14:10,506 --> 00:14:12,986
Open fire Private!
177
00:14:12,986 --> 00:14:14,626
Damn it!
That's an order!
178
00:14:14,626 --> 00:14:16,346
Gimme the gun!
179
00:14:24,266 --> 00:14:27,506
[Native language]
180
00:15:08,106 --> 00:15:11,546
CAPTAIN:
You alright Lieutenant?
BRAIN: Yeah, I think so.
181
00:15:11,546 --> 00:15:13,626
Guys, what about them?
182
00:15:14,626 --> 00:15:16,666
SKEEMER:
I say we introduce
ourselves.
183
00:15:16,666 --> 00:15:19,187
Not so fast Skeemer,
these women are savages.
184
00:15:19,187 --> 00:15:20,466
I'm counting on it.
185
00:15:20,466 --> 00:15:22,466
CAPTAIN:
The sergeant's right,
we may not be welcome.
186
00:15:22,466 --> 00:15:24,106
Who cares, we're the army!
187
00:15:24,106 --> 00:15:27,187
Uncle Sam expects a
certain amount of
cavorting and pillaging.
188
00:15:27,746 --> 00:15:28,986
Surrender!
189
00:15:28,986 --> 00:15:30,626
You speak English!
190
00:15:30,626 --> 00:15:32,146
Surrender or die!
191
00:15:32,146 --> 00:15:33,986
You speak English very well!
192
00:15:33,986 --> 00:15:36,346
Which one of you
is Uncle Sam?
193
00:15:36,346 --> 00:15:37,346
Uncle Sam?
194
00:15:37,346 --> 00:15:40,067
CAVE-GIRL:
The leader you spoke of.
195
00:15:40,067 --> 00:15:41,426
What do you want him for?
196
00:15:41,426 --> 00:15:43,506
We want to kill him!
197
00:15:43,506 --> 00:15:46,386
Well this is a fine mess
you've got us into Sam!
198
00:15:47,146 --> 00:15:47,986
Excuse me ma'am.
199
00:15:47,986 --> 00:15:49,866
I'm the leader of this unit.
200
00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:52,986
Captain Jason Briggs,
United Sates Army.
201
00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:58,426
I do not know these
words you speak. You
are men are you not?
202
00:15:58,426 --> 00:16:02,546
Well I can't speak
for everybody, but
I'm all man.
203
00:16:02,546 --> 00:16:04,746
You must come with us!
204
00:16:04,746 --> 00:16:06,546
Excuse me, you don't
give orders here. I do.
205
00:16:06,546 --> 00:16:09,906
[Laughter]
206
00:16:12,226 --> 00:16:13,786
What's so funny?
207
00:16:13,786 --> 00:16:15,986
Men, giving orders!
208
00:16:16,426 --> 00:16:18,626
Everyone knows you are
brainless beasts.
209
00:16:18,626 --> 00:16:21,466
Sticks and stones will
break our bones, but
names will never hurt us.
210
00:16:21,466 --> 00:16:22,586
We have sticks!
211
00:16:22,586 --> 00:16:23,706
And stones!
212
00:16:23,706 --> 00:16:25,506
Let's break some bones!
213
00:16:25,986 --> 00:16:28,426
Hold it Healey.
214
00:16:28,426 --> 00:16:30,586
We'll go peacefully.
215
00:16:44,186 --> 00:16:46,466
TURBO:
I'm sorry I froze
back there Captain.
216
00:16:46,466 --> 00:16:48,506
CAPTAIN:
When I give one of my
soldiers a direct order...
217
00:16:48,506 --> 00:16:50,386
I expect it to be
followed. Understood?
218
00:16:50,386 --> 00:16:51,466
TURBO:
Yes Sir.
219
00:16:51,466 --> 00:16:53,106
TURBO:
It's just that ever since
I was a little kid...
220
00:16:53,106 --> 00:16:55,666
I've always been afraid of
anything creepy crawly.
221
00:16:55,666 --> 00:16:57,346
SARGE:
Begging your
pardon Captain...
222
00:16:57,346 --> 00:16:59,666
but why did we
surrender so easily?
223
00:16:59,666 --> 00:17:01,426
CAPTAIN:
These women know their
way around the island.
224
00:17:01,426 --> 00:17:02,986
We may need their
help to get off.
225
00:17:02,986 --> 00:17:04,547
SKEEMER:
You can say that again.
226
00:17:11,507 --> 00:17:12,906
CAPTAIN:
Will ya get a
load of that?
227
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:14,186
TURBO:
Unbelievable.
228
00:17:14,186 --> 00:17:15,106
SARGE:
Amazing.
229
00:17:15,106 --> 00:17:17,787
SKEEMER:
I've been wondering what
the dog was doing with
all those bones?
230
00:17:17,787 --> 00:17:19,267
Go! Go!
231
00:17:19,267 --> 00:17:21,826
Yes ma'am. Gentlemen,
let's proceed.
232
00:17:28,346 --> 00:17:29,666
TURBO:
Sarge, what do make of this?
233
00:17:29,666 --> 00:17:32,067
TURBO:
First that wotsit on the
beach, and now this?
234
00:17:32,067 --> 00:17:35,466
SARGE:
You got me Turbo. Ask
Kincaid, he's Mr Knowitall.
235
00:17:35,466 --> 00:17:37,226
BRAIN:
I can't explain it either.
236
00:17:37,226 --> 00:17:39,426
BRAIN:
I mean could be we just
landed on some piece of rock...
237
00:17:39,426 --> 00:17:40,746
that time just simply forgot.
238
00:17:40,746 --> 00:17:42,507
TURBO: You mean...
SKEEMER: Yes!
239
00:17:42,507 --> 00:17:47,746
SKEEMER:
This could be...
Dan dan daa...
Dinosaur Island!
240
00:17:47,746 --> 00:17:49,146
[Roaring]
241
00:17:49,146 --> 00:17:50,507
CAPTAIN:
Look alive men!
242
00:17:55,186 --> 00:17:57,106
CAVE-GIRL:
Move along! Move along!
243
00:17:57,106 --> 00:17:58,666
The thunder beast
will not hurt you.
244
00:17:58,666 --> 00:17:59,946
They only feed on leaves.
245
00:17:59,946 --> 00:18:01,466
Come along! Come along!
246
00:18:01,466 --> 00:18:02,866
SKEEMER:
Bet they make
great pets too...
247
00:18:02,866 --> 00:18:04,666
once you get
them house broken.
248
00:18:43,866 --> 00:18:46,507
You're right John,
this is Club Med!
249
00:18:53,346 --> 00:18:55,866
If anybody wants me,
I'll be by the pool.
250
00:18:56,226 --> 00:18:59,507
Do not move, or I'll
put my spear in you!
251
00:18:59,507 --> 00:19:02,027
Sounds a little kinky, but
hey, I'll try anything once.
252
00:19:02,027 --> 00:19:03,547
What's going to
happen to us?
253
00:19:03,547 --> 00:19:06,706
That is for Queen
Morganna to decide.
254
00:19:06,706 --> 00:19:09,307
This will decide
what happens to me.
255
00:19:09,307 --> 00:19:10,547
Queen!
256
00:19:10,547 --> 00:19:12,866
CAVE-GIRLS: Move! Go! Go!
CAPTAIN: You afraid?
TURBO: Well...
257
00:19:23,386 --> 00:19:24,626
TURBO:
Oh mamma!
258
00:19:26,746 --> 00:19:29,426
CAVE-GIRL:
Neal! Neal you dogs!
259
00:19:32,706 --> 00:19:36,226
Who are you who dares
enter my domain?
260
00:19:36,226 --> 00:19:38,626
We are soldiers your majesty.
261
00:19:38,626 --> 00:19:40,426
Soldiers?
262
00:19:40,426 --> 00:19:43,586
Yes, like your warriors.
263
00:19:43,586 --> 00:19:48,586
Impossible! You're too small
and fleshy to be warriors,
or men for that matter.
264
00:19:48,586 --> 00:19:49,946
Now wait just a minute...
265
00:19:50,706 --> 00:19:51,226
Ow!
266
00:19:51,226 --> 00:19:53,146
Take away their fire spears!
267
00:19:59,067 --> 00:20:00,346
Oh mighty Queen.
268
00:20:00,346 --> 00:20:04,386
If they are warriors,
perhaps they have been
sent to us for a reason.
269
00:20:04,386 --> 00:20:07,146
And what reason would
that be princess?
270
00:20:07,146 --> 00:20:10,186
Maybe they can save us,
from the Great One.
271
00:20:10,826 --> 00:20:12,386
Jackie Gleason?
272
00:20:12,386 --> 00:20:13,866
Do you really believe...
273
00:20:13,866 --> 00:20:17,666
that these puny creatures
could succeed where our
forefathers have failed?
274
00:20:21,186 --> 00:20:22,547
[Heavy sigh]
275
00:20:22,547 --> 00:20:25,226
No my Queen.
I don't.
276
00:20:25,226 --> 00:20:27,586
Take these worthless
fools from my sight.
277
00:20:27,586 --> 00:20:29,346
Put them to work
in the pits.
278
00:20:34,547 --> 00:20:36,666
SKEEMER:
Is that the barbecue...?
279
00:20:37,986 --> 00:20:40,906
I remember a little place
in Patterson New Jersey
called the Pit Stop.
280
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:42,146
It was a great little bar.
281
00:20:42,146 --> 00:20:44,146
CAPTAIN:
I bet this pit won't
be as much fun.
282
00:20:44,466 --> 00:20:46,826
CAVE-GIRL:
That's where you will
spend the rest of your
lives in chains.
283
00:20:46,826 --> 00:20:47,826
TURBO:
That's what they
said in Paterson.
284
00:20:47,826 --> 00:20:48,586
CAPTAIN:
Hell!
285
00:21:02,346 --> 00:21:03,466
Wayne!
286
00:21:05,307 --> 00:21:06,706
Skeemer!
287
00:21:08,027 --> 00:21:09,906
Actually, you know, we had
nothing to do with this.
288
00:21:09,906 --> 00:21:12,826
Captain Briggs!
Kinda crazy, you know.
289
00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:18,386
It's you!
290
00:21:18,386 --> 00:21:20,586
It's you? I resemble
that remark.
291
00:21:20,946 --> 00:21:22,506
It's you!
292
00:21:22,506 --> 00:21:23,946
Me!?
293
00:21:24,146 --> 00:21:26,027
CAVE-GIRL:
You bear the mark!
294
00:21:26,027 --> 00:21:28,506
CAVE-GIRL:
The one we've
been waiting for!
295
00:21:28,506 --> 00:21:30,146
Our savior!
296
00:21:30,146 --> 00:21:32,346
Right!
It's me!
297
00:21:32,706 --> 00:21:34,307
SKEEMER:
I'm here!
298
00:21:35,106 --> 00:21:38,906
Yeah! I'm here! With
the mark, and...
299
00:21:38,906 --> 00:21:40,946
I'm here! It's me!
300
00:21:53,027 --> 00:21:54,866
Why do these
men still live?
301
00:21:54,866 --> 00:21:56,906
Because they are
not men Queen.
302
00:21:56,906 --> 00:21:58,146
They are gods.
303
00:21:58,146 --> 00:22:00,106
This one has the mark.
304
00:22:00,106 --> 00:22:03,307
Courtesy of Wyn-Ray's
Tattoos, Deuce and Broadway.
305
00:22:03,706 --> 00:22:04,706
A trick!
306
00:22:04,706 --> 00:22:07,466
Summon the soothsayer!
We shall let her decide.
307
00:22:20,186 --> 00:22:24,307
Ask your bones whether
or not these creatures
possess magic.
308
00:22:24,547 --> 00:22:25,946
It is true
your highness.
309
00:22:25,946 --> 00:22:28,547
These are the gods predicted
in the sacred scroll.
310
00:22:28,547 --> 00:22:30,106
Sacred scroll?
311
00:22:30,746 --> 00:22:33,586
It is foretold in the midst
of a terrible famine...
312
00:22:33,586 --> 00:22:34,787
the ocean would open up...
313
00:22:34,787 --> 00:22:37,506
and out would come five
strange and wonderful gods.
314
00:22:37,506 --> 00:22:38,866
I've been called strange!
315
00:22:38,866 --> 00:22:40,186
I've got dibs on wonderful.
316
00:22:40,186 --> 00:22:42,626
And my tummy's been
growling ever since
I got here.
317
00:22:42,706 --> 00:22:45,466
They would wear
foreign robes and
provide us with food.
318
00:22:46,266 --> 00:22:47,346
Tick Tack?
319
00:22:47,346 --> 00:22:48,787
But most importantly...
320
00:22:48,787 --> 00:22:50,386
among them, there
would be one...
321
00:22:50,386 --> 00:22:52,266
who the yellow
sun similes on...
322
00:22:52,266 --> 00:22:54,586
His magic would be the
most powerful of all.
323
00:22:54,586 --> 00:22:56,106
For he will be the one...
324
00:22:56,106 --> 00:22:56,946
that will be the savior...
325
00:22:56,946 --> 00:22:59,067
who will deliver us
from the Great One.
326
00:22:59,067 --> 00:23:02,106
Hey! I only deliver
to within a one mile
radius of my house.
327
00:23:02,106 --> 00:23:03,067
Skeemer.
328
00:23:03,067 --> 00:23:04,506
My people are starving...
329
00:23:04,506 --> 00:23:08,626
and I refuse to place
their fate in the hands
of these so called gods.
330
00:23:08,626 --> 00:23:11,826
Hey Queenie! Don't
be such a sour puss!
Your savior is here!
331
00:23:11,826 --> 00:23:13,307
Put on a happy face!
332
00:23:24,506 --> 00:23:26,067
Where are you
taking us to?
333
00:23:26,067 --> 00:23:27,746
We must prepare
you for battle.
334
00:23:27,746 --> 00:23:29,866
Hey! Is that
spear loaded?
335
00:23:37,586 --> 00:23:46,946
[Laughter]
336
00:23:51,626 --> 00:23:53,426
SKEEMER:
The girls have great
auras over there.
337
00:23:53,426 --> 00:23:54,186
TURBO:
Huh?
338
00:23:59,866 --> 00:24:01,586
BRAIN:
You know, I think I'll
stay here for a while.
339
00:24:01,586 --> 00:24:02,787
BRAIN:
Check me in.
340
00:24:02,866 --> 00:24:04,186
TURBO:
Wow.
341
00:24:16,946 --> 00:24:18,386
SKEEMER:
One, two, three,
four, five, six.
342
00:24:18,386 --> 00:24:21,106
TURBO:
This is great, we don't
ever have to leave here.
343
00:24:37,986 --> 00:24:40,626
Hey! You missed a spot.
344
00:24:40,626 --> 00:24:42,186
[Laughter]
345
00:24:56,067 --> 00:24:57,906
It's a little too
much for me.
346
00:24:57,906 --> 00:24:59,426
Getting kinda dizzy.
347
00:25:12,266 --> 00:25:13,226
You're so big...
348
00:25:13,226 --> 00:25:14,586
and strong.
349
00:25:14,586 --> 00:25:15,466
Ah, tickles, ha!
350
00:25:17,826 --> 00:25:19,906
Would you mind rubbing
a little lower.
351
00:25:20,426 --> 00:25:21,706
Ah.
352
00:25:21,706 --> 00:25:23,186
That's it! Perfect.
353
00:25:23,506 --> 00:25:25,787
This sure beats basic
training Skeemer.
354
00:25:25,787 --> 00:25:27,706
SKEEMER:
You can say
that again.
355
00:25:27,706 --> 00:25:30,186
Speaking of which,
we're two gods short.
356
00:25:30,186 --> 00:25:34,266
[Laughter]
357
00:25:56,826 --> 00:25:58,506
Let's give it a try.
358
00:26:00,906 --> 00:26:04,506
This is Sergeant Healey of
the United States Army.
359
00:26:04,506 --> 00:26:10,026
This is an S.O.S..
Does anybody read
me. Come in. Over.
360
00:26:12,746 --> 00:26:15,106
You know, you girls never
even told us your names.
361
00:26:15,106 --> 00:26:17,506
Our names cannot be
spoken in your language.
362
00:26:17,506 --> 00:26:20,026
Our language?
You speak English.
363
00:26:20,026 --> 00:26:21,906
But it is not our
native tongue...
364
00:26:21,906 --> 00:26:25,666
It was taught to us by
missionaries who landed
here many moons ago.
365
00:26:25,666 --> 00:26:27,067
Missionaries?
366
00:26:27,067 --> 00:26:29,466
They came from the
sea. Just as you did.
367
00:26:29,706 --> 00:26:32,466
At first, we thought
they too were gods.
368
00:26:32,466 --> 00:26:33,906
What happened to them?
369
00:26:33,906 --> 00:26:36,266
They went into the jungle
to slay the Great One.
370
00:26:37,386 --> 00:26:38,626
And?
371
00:26:38,626 --> 00:26:40,906
And never came back.
372
00:26:49,106 --> 00:26:50,547
It's no use Captain.
373
00:26:50,547 --> 00:26:52,706
The signal is not
being picked up.
374
00:26:53,186 --> 00:26:55,986
We're going to
have to broadcast
from higher ground.
375
00:26:56,586 --> 00:26:58,067
Let's wrap it up.
376
00:27:08,466 --> 00:27:09,946
BRAIN:
What?
377
00:27:09,946 --> 00:27:12,226
We thought you might
need your fire spears.
378
00:27:12,787 --> 00:27:14,906
We will await word
of your victory.
379
00:27:14,906 --> 00:27:17,746
I'm dedicating our
victory to you.
380
00:27:19,226 --> 00:27:22,067
Wait, this is silly. We've
got to call you something.
381
00:27:23,746 --> 00:27:28,146
I know, from now on,
you are Miss April,
Miss May and Miss June.
382
00:27:28,146 --> 00:27:28,866
April?
383
00:27:28,866 --> 00:27:29,866
May?
384
00:27:29,866 --> 00:27:30,426
June?
385
00:27:30,426 --> 00:27:32,026
What do these
names mean?
386
00:27:32,826 --> 00:27:34,186
This will explain
everything.
387
00:27:34,186 --> 00:27:35,266
What is it?
388
00:27:35,266 --> 00:27:36,986
Our sacred scroll.
389
00:27:36,986 --> 00:27:38,547
MAY:
Is it magic?
390
00:27:38,547 --> 00:27:39,706
You have no idea.
391
00:27:40,426 --> 00:27:44,386
Now study it hard because
we will be giving you a
pop quiz later on.
392
00:27:57,266 --> 00:27:58,426
JUNE:
This is sacred?
393
00:27:58,426 --> 00:27:59,866
APRIL:
Sacred scroll?
394
00:27:59,866 --> 00:28:01,826
TURBO:
Why don't we try going
downhill for a while?
395
00:28:01,826 --> 00:28:06,146
SKEEMER:
Because the girls said to
follow the sun five leagues
past the flowery knoll.
396
00:28:06,146 --> 00:28:07,226
BRAIN:
Yeah, and then what?
397
00:28:07,226 --> 00:28:08,146
SKEEMER:
What do you mean?
398
00:28:08,146 --> 00:28:09,466
BRAIN:
I mean what's
our plan?
399
00:28:09,547 --> 00:28:12,226
SKEEMER:
We kill the Great One and
come back conquering heroes.
400
00:28:12,226 --> 00:28:13,146
TURBO:
You think it's that simple?
401
00:28:13,146 --> 00:28:14,067
SKEEMER:
Absolutely.
402
00:28:14,067 --> 00:28:16,586
BRAIN:
I don't know John, you saw
what that thing did to Buzz.
403
00:28:16,986 --> 00:28:18,026
Look!
404
00:28:18,026 --> 00:28:20,186
It's the worst
creature of all...
405
00:28:22,426 --> 00:28:24,226
The sargasaurus!
406
00:28:33,906 --> 00:28:34,706
TURBO:
Hiya Cap.
407
00:28:34,706 --> 00:28:36,386
TURBO:
Boy am I glad
to see you guys.
408
00:28:36,386 --> 00:28:37,866
CAPTAIN:
Jesus Christ!
409
00:28:39,146 --> 00:28:40,626
What are you guys
doing here?
410
00:28:41,067 --> 00:28:42,586
SARGE:
Trying to signal
the rescue party.
411
00:28:42,586 --> 00:28:43,826
Rescue party!
412
00:28:44,067 --> 00:28:45,506
You don't get
it do you?
413
00:28:45,506 --> 00:28:47,626
If we get rescued,
the party's over!
414
00:28:47,626 --> 00:28:49,626
Party! What the hell
is he talking about.
415
00:28:49,626 --> 00:28:51,226
And how did you get
our weapons back?
416
00:28:51,226 --> 00:28:53,106
The women think
we're gods.
417
00:28:53,106 --> 00:28:56,626
And all we have to do
is kill the Great One
to prove ourselves.
418
00:28:56,626 --> 00:28:58,186
You gotta
be kidding!
419
00:28:58,186 --> 00:29:01,586
Turbo here couldn't even
kill a garden snake, let
alone a dinosaur.
420
00:29:01,586 --> 00:29:02,826
But if we do...
421
00:29:02,826 --> 00:29:06,787
we could spend the
rest of our lives
living in paradise.
422
00:29:08,026 --> 00:29:09,386
I hate to disappoint you...
423
00:29:09,386 --> 00:29:11,986
but you three are going
back to jail and I'm
going to put you there.
424
00:29:13,266 --> 00:29:14,266
You getting anything
Sergeant?
425
00:29:14,266 --> 00:29:16,426
Just a hiss. Nothing
but static.
426
00:29:16,426 --> 00:29:19,106
I hear it too, but it
doesn't sound like static.
427
00:29:19,106 --> 00:29:21,826
And I don't think it's
coming from the radio.
428
00:29:21,826 --> 00:29:23,666
CAPTAIN:
Where is it coming from?
429
00:29:23,666 --> 00:29:28,746
[Trumpeting]
430
00:29:28,826 --> 00:29:29,866
SKEEMER:
Oh shit!
431
00:29:30,226 --> 00:29:31,307
CAPTAIN:
Fire!
432
00:30:32,946 --> 00:30:34,786
I do not understand.
433
00:30:34,786 --> 00:30:37,346
How is it possible
for a god to die?
434
00:30:38,426 --> 00:30:41,426
His magic must not have
been very powerful.
435
00:30:41,426 --> 00:30:44,146
The important thing is
that they have slain
the Great One.
436
00:30:44,146 --> 00:30:45,986
The Queen will be
very pleased.
437
00:30:45,986 --> 00:30:47,986
This is cause for
a celebration.
438
00:30:47,986 --> 00:30:50,706
No not yet. First we
have to bury our dead.
439
00:30:52,586 --> 00:30:54,386
What's your angle?
440
00:30:54,386 --> 00:30:56,346
What are you
talking about?
441
00:30:56,346 --> 00:31:01,346
You never gave a shit about
Healey. Why the sudden
change of heart?
442
00:31:01,346 --> 00:31:04,866
The captain is right
John. I mean you always
though he was a jerk.
443
00:31:04,866 --> 00:31:07,226
But he was
our jerk.
444
00:31:16,826 --> 00:31:18,226
TURBO:
What is this place.
445
00:31:18,226 --> 00:31:19,666
JUNE:
It is heaven.
446
00:31:19,666 --> 00:31:20,786
SKEEMER:
Heaven?
447
00:31:20,786 --> 00:31:23,346
APRIL:
That is the word the
missionaries taught us.
448
00:31:23,346 --> 00:31:26,026
MAY:
It means the place
you go after you die.
449
00:31:26,026 --> 00:31:27,866
BRAIN:
It's a burial ground.
450
00:31:27,866 --> 00:31:29,186
SKEEMER:
Get a load of that!
451
00:31:29,547 --> 00:31:32,026
BRAIN:
Looks like something
right out of King Kong.
452
00:31:35,786 --> 00:31:38,706
Captain, wouldn't it be
easier to bury him at sea?
453
00:31:40,226 --> 00:31:43,026
Wayne. How's your arm?
454
00:31:43,386 --> 00:31:44,986
It's okay sir.
455
00:31:45,586 --> 00:31:46,946
Give it a rest.
456
00:31:46,946 --> 00:31:48,106
I'm fine.
457
00:31:48,106 --> 00:31:49,826
CAPTAIN:
That's an order.
458
00:31:50,026 --> 00:31:51,307
Turbo.
459
00:31:51,307 --> 00:31:53,307
Take over.
460
00:31:59,786 --> 00:32:01,626
Come on, let's put
some muscle in it!
461
00:32:03,986 --> 00:32:05,506
You are in pain?
462
00:32:05,506 --> 00:32:08,307
Just give me a bullet to
bite on and I'll be fine.
463
00:32:08,307 --> 00:32:10,146
I do not understand.
464
00:32:10,146 --> 00:32:12,307
Yeah, I'm in pain.
465
00:32:12,307 --> 00:32:14,466
And eating a bullet
will help?
466
00:32:15,866 --> 00:32:17,906
I don't think anything
on this island is
going to help.
467
00:32:17,906 --> 00:32:19,706
What about me?
468
00:32:20,666 --> 00:32:22,266
You?
469
00:32:22,266 --> 00:32:24,666
Come.
470
00:32:27,426 --> 00:32:30,826
Hey Captain. My arm
is starting to hurt.
471
00:32:30,826 --> 00:32:31,906
Dig!
472
00:32:39,307 --> 00:32:40,546
Where are we going?
473
00:32:40,546 --> 00:32:42,067
You'll see.
474
00:32:46,546 --> 00:32:48,026
Wow.
475
00:32:48,026 --> 00:32:49,146
Come.
476
00:32:51,986 --> 00:32:52,946
Sit.
477
00:32:58,746 --> 00:33:03,146
[Chanting]
478
00:33:03,506 --> 00:33:04,906
Ow! Ow, ow.
479
00:33:07,226 --> 00:33:08,346
Ow! What are you doing?
480
00:33:08,346 --> 00:33:09,386
I'm healing you!
481
00:33:09,386 --> 00:33:10,866
Could have fooled me.
482
00:33:21,466 --> 00:33:30,786
[Chanting]
483
00:33:39,266 --> 00:33:48,346
[Chanting]
484
00:33:49,826 --> 00:33:51,067
Come!
485
00:33:59,026 --> 00:34:01,026
Ow! Ow! Ow!
486
00:34:01,026 --> 00:34:03,786
I'm healing you.
I'm healing you.
487
00:34:03,786 --> 00:34:06,946
No, it's the water. It's
making my arm burn.
488
00:34:09,427 --> 00:34:13,027
Argh! Argha, ah.
489
00:34:20,626 --> 00:34:22,106
My God!
490
00:34:23,146 --> 00:34:25,266
It's like it was
never there.
491
00:34:27,746 --> 00:34:29,786
How can I ever thank you?
492
00:34:29,786 --> 00:34:32,467
Teach me page 34.
493
00:34:32,467 --> 00:34:34,626
Page 34.
494
00:34:35,547 --> 00:34:37,746
Oh! In the magazine?
495
00:34:38,106 --> 00:34:39,987
Oh.
496
00:34:39,987 --> 00:34:41,826
Well, um...
497
00:34:42,706 --> 00:34:45,547
It starts something
like this.
498
00:34:47,027 --> 00:34:48,626
No, no.
499
00:34:48,626 --> 00:34:50,786
Hold still.
500
00:35:59,106 --> 00:36:01,426
Page 34.
501
00:36:01,746 --> 00:36:04,386
Page 34.
502
00:36:05,386 --> 00:36:08,626
Page 34!
503
00:36:19,426 --> 00:36:21,586
May almighty God have
mercy on his soul.
504
00:36:21,586 --> 00:36:23,947
Amen.
505
00:36:25,027 --> 00:36:26,386
Where have you been?
506
00:36:26,386 --> 00:36:29,106
I'll explain it to you
when I understand it.
507
00:36:29,106 --> 00:36:30,146
Come sisters.
508
00:36:30,146 --> 00:36:33,586
We must bring word
of the Great One's
death to the Queen.
509
00:36:33,586 --> 00:36:35,226
We'll meet you back
at the village.
510
00:36:44,146 --> 00:36:46,706
All right men. Let's
get the gear and go.
511
00:36:57,426 --> 00:36:59,547
BRAIN:
There goes the Great One.
512
00:36:59,547 --> 00:37:02,106
SKEEMER: So much
for the Great One.
CAPTAIN: Look alive! Look alive!
513
00:37:04,386 --> 00:37:06,987
Take good long
look ladies.
514
00:37:06,987 --> 00:37:08,186
It's wonderful!
515
00:37:08,186 --> 00:37:09,467
A miracle.
516
00:37:09,467 --> 00:37:11,746
This meat will
feed many mouths.
517
00:37:12,626 --> 00:37:14,786
But where is
the Great One?
518
00:37:14,786 --> 00:37:16,467
Where's the what?
519
00:37:16,467 --> 00:37:17,626
BRAIN:
We though that...
520
00:37:17,626 --> 00:37:18,547
TURBO:
Isn't that...
521
00:37:18,547 --> 00:37:20,826
QUEEN:
This is just a
beast of armor.
522
00:37:20,826 --> 00:37:21,826
Oh no!
523
00:37:21,826 --> 00:37:24,306
And a baby
one at that.
524
00:37:24,306 --> 00:37:25,866
BRAIN:
Oh no.
525
00:37:25,866 --> 00:37:28,626
The Great One is
ten times as big.
526
00:37:29,547 --> 00:37:34,346
[Distant roaring]
527
00:37:34,786 --> 00:37:35,987
TURBO:
Um.
528
00:37:35,987 --> 00:37:37,266
What was that?
529
00:37:37,467 --> 00:37:39,547
The Great One.
530
00:37:39,547 --> 00:37:41,106
Oh boy.
531
00:37:41,106 --> 00:37:41,706
Don't worry.
532
00:37:41,706 --> 00:37:44,586
We'll take care of the
Great One, just like we
took care of this guy.
533
00:37:45,507 --> 00:37:48,067
That's not going to be so
easy without ammunition.
534
00:37:48,666 --> 00:37:51,467
And boys...
we're fresh out.
535
00:37:51,467 --> 00:37:54,146
[Laughs]
536
00:38:06,027 --> 00:38:07,346
You've failed!
537
00:38:07,346 --> 00:38:09,266
Proving once and fall
all you're frauds...
538
00:38:09,266 --> 00:38:11,067
not gods but mere men.
539
00:38:11,067 --> 00:38:12,346
Not so fast Queenie.
540
00:38:12,346 --> 00:38:13,786
Aren't you forgetting
something?
541
00:38:13,786 --> 00:38:14,826
What!
542
00:38:14,987 --> 00:38:16,426
The first part
of the prophecy.
543
00:38:16,426 --> 00:38:18,507
We've produced food in
the middle of a famine.
544
00:38:18,507 --> 00:38:19,987
They're right Morganna.
545
00:38:19,987 --> 00:38:23,027
The beast of armor
will feed the entire
village for a week.
546
00:38:23,027 --> 00:38:25,146
Never the less, I am
the law giver...
547
00:38:25,146 --> 00:38:28,426
and I say that these
men can bring only
harm to the village.
548
00:38:28,426 --> 00:38:30,547
They must all die.
549
00:38:30,547 --> 00:38:31,467
No!
550
00:38:31,467 --> 00:38:33,786
You dare challenge
your Queen.
551
00:38:33,786 --> 00:38:35,106
JUNE:
April is right!
552
00:38:35,106 --> 00:38:37,266
These men have
done us no evil.
553
00:38:37,266 --> 00:38:39,507
Only helped us in our
struggle to survive.
554
00:38:39,507 --> 00:38:43,706
My command will still be
carried out immediately!
555
00:38:43,706 --> 00:38:44,666
No!
556
00:38:44,666 --> 00:38:46,987
As written in the
sacred scroll...
557
00:38:46,987 --> 00:38:50,706
I challenge thee
to Oh-Ma-Pa!
558
00:38:52,346 --> 00:38:53,666
Oh my papa?
559
00:38:53,666 --> 00:38:54,947
Oh-Ma-Pa.
560
00:38:54,947 --> 00:38:55,987
I've heard of it John.
561
00:38:55,987 --> 00:38:58,666
The druids used it to oppose
the laws of their leaders.
562
00:38:59,226 --> 00:39:00,547
Very well then.
563
00:39:00,547 --> 00:39:02,866
As it is written,
so shall it be.
564
00:39:02,866 --> 00:39:05,666
We fight this night in
the circle of power.
565
00:39:05,666 --> 00:39:08,386
If you win, the men
will be spared...
566
00:39:08,386 --> 00:39:10,426
but if you lose, you...
567
00:39:10,426 --> 00:39:11,706
your traitorous sisters...
568
00:39:11,706 --> 00:39:16,346
and these pitiful warriors
will all suffer a fiery
death, in the pit.
569
00:39:16,826 --> 00:39:18,346
Well your Majesty...
570
00:39:18,346 --> 00:39:20,507
since this is going
to decide our fate...
571
00:39:20,507 --> 00:39:22,626
I think we have the
right to watch.
572
00:39:23,746 --> 00:39:26,266
So be it.
573
00:39:34,146 --> 00:39:35,226
Silence!
574
00:39:36,106 --> 00:39:40,386
The ceremony of Oh-Ma-Pa
will now commence.
575
00:39:41,746 --> 00:39:42,746
Grrrr.
576
00:39:43,467 --> 00:39:44,306
Begin!
577
00:40:00,426 --> 00:40:02,426
BRAIN:
Oh no!
578
00:40:13,547 --> 00:40:15,826
[Cheering]
579
00:40:15,826 --> 00:40:18,866
June! June! June! June!
580
00:40:21,146 --> 00:40:21,866
JUNE:
Grrrr.
581
00:40:41,266 --> 00:40:42,106
Aghhh.
582
00:40:42,106 --> 00:40:43,786
[Cheering]
583
00:40:43,786 --> 00:40:46,266
Aghhh.
584
00:40:46,266 --> 00:40:48,467
[Cheering]
585
00:40:48,467 --> 00:40:50,306
Aghhh.
586
00:40:51,586 --> 00:40:54,106
Aghhh.
587
00:41:30,426 --> 00:41:31,786
Aghhh.
588
00:41:35,866 --> 00:41:37,507
Ohhh.
589
00:41:39,666 --> 00:41:41,547
Aghhh.
590
00:41:42,666 --> 00:41:44,547
Aghhh.
591
00:41:48,467 --> 00:41:49,706
We won!
592
00:41:54,786 --> 00:41:55,306
June!
593
00:41:56,146 --> 00:41:57,826
This calls for
a celebration.
594
00:41:57,826 --> 00:42:00,906
SKEEMER: Everybody party!
BRAIN: Party! Yes! Yes!
595
00:42:01,786 --> 00:42:04,507
Come on down Captain. Offer
only good while supplies last.
596
00:42:04,507 --> 00:42:05,626
No thanks!
597
00:42:06,386 --> 00:42:07,507
What's wrong with him?
598
00:42:07,507 --> 00:42:09,987
He's just upset because the
transmitter was destroyed.
599
00:42:09,987 --> 00:42:10,906
Oh that's a real shame.
600
00:42:10,906 --> 00:42:12,146
It looks like we're
stuck on this island...
601
00:42:12,146 --> 00:42:14,467
with a bunch of
beautiful women for
the rest of our lives.
602
00:42:14,467 --> 00:42:15,786
What about
the Great One?
603
00:42:15,946 --> 00:42:17,306
We're stuck with him.
604
00:42:17,306 --> 00:42:19,706
And it's not going
to be easy killing
him with no ammo.
605
00:42:20,106 --> 00:42:21,146
BRAIN:
He's right John.
606
00:42:21,146 --> 00:42:23,987
I mean what's going to
happen to use once the
girls find out the truth?
607
00:42:24,906 --> 00:42:26,746
I'll tell you what's
going to happen.
608
00:42:26,746 --> 00:42:30,386
We're going to end up
in the bottom of that pit
everyone's been talking about.
609
00:42:30,386 --> 00:42:33,306
That's why our first
order of business is
to end this famine.
610
00:42:33,306 --> 00:42:35,067
Yeah, but how are we
going to do that?
611
00:42:35,226 --> 00:42:37,266
You mean how are you
going to do that?
612
00:42:37,266 --> 00:42:38,146
Me!
613
00:42:38,146 --> 00:42:39,547
Why me?
614
00:42:39,547 --> 00:42:41,706
They don't call you Wayne
the Brain for nothing!
615
00:43:08,027 --> 00:43:11,626
You mean to tell me that no
fruit bearing plants will
grow here on the island.
616
00:43:11,626 --> 00:43:12,666
Oh yes.
617
00:43:12,666 --> 00:43:14,906
We have tried
and succeeded.
618
00:43:14,906 --> 00:43:18,067
Only the food is
always devoured before
we can harvest it.
619
00:43:18,706 --> 00:43:20,027
By the Great One?
620
00:43:20,027 --> 00:43:21,906
No, by the small ones.
621
00:43:22,547 --> 00:43:23,906
The small ones?
622
00:43:27,746 --> 00:43:30,906
Oh gross!
623
00:43:34,547 --> 00:43:36,906
Come on.
I got an idea.
624
00:43:48,346 --> 00:43:49,946
What are you doing?
625
00:43:50,346 --> 00:43:52,386
Making a pesticide.
626
00:43:53,666 --> 00:43:55,626
Pesticide?
627
00:43:56,426 --> 00:43:58,866
Yeah. It's sort
of like a potion..
628
00:43:58,866 --> 00:43:59,666
that will...
629
00:43:59,666 --> 00:44:02,306
help to protect
your harvest.
630
00:44:03,226 --> 00:44:06,866
Impossible. Magic is
useless against
the small ones.
631
00:44:06,866 --> 00:44:08,786
This isn't magic.
632
00:44:08,786 --> 00:44:10,426
This is chemistry.
633
00:44:11,826 --> 00:44:15,027
What is chemistry?
634
00:44:16,626 --> 00:44:17,987
Here, I'll show you.
635
00:44:17,987 --> 00:44:21,426
All right. I'm taking
a little iodine. Okay.
636
00:44:21,946 --> 00:44:23,426
I mix this...
637
00:44:23,426 --> 00:44:25,426
with mosquito repellent.
638
00:44:29,586 --> 00:44:32,106
Then, I dilute
it with water.
639
00:44:33,786 --> 00:44:38,786
And finally I add my
secret ingredient.
640
00:44:41,027 --> 00:44:42,626
It smells awful!
641
00:44:42,866 --> 00:44:43,906
What is it?
642
00:44:43,906 --> 00:44:45,586
Dinosaur urine?
643
00:44:46,626 --> 00:44:49,746
No, Skeemer's aftershave.
644
00:44:50,826 --> 00:44:54,346
Will it really keep the small
ones away from our crops?
645
00:44:55,186 --> 00:44:56,507
I don't see why not.
646
00:44:56,507 --> 00:44:58,946
Keeps the women
away from Skeemer.
647
00:45:12,306 --> 00:45:14,507
April, what's your
favorite food.
648
00:45:14,547 --> 00:45:17,306
Mmmm, I love
pterodactyl. Why?
649
00:45:17,346 --> 00:45:20,626
Because I was thinking
maybe we could go out
for dinner tonight.
650
00:45:20,626 --> 00:45:23,266
But we eat out
every night.
651
00:45:23,266 --> 00:45:26,746
I don't mean outside.
I mean out on a date.
652
00:45:27,106 --> 00:45:29,547
What is a date?
653
00:45:29,547 --> 00:45:32,266
It's when two people want
to be alone together.
654
00:45:32,266 --> 00:45:36,626
But how can be be
alone and together
at the same time?
655
00:45:36,626 --> 00:45:38,987
I mean we'll be
by ourselves.
656
00:45:39,426 --> 00:45:42,027
For what reason?
657
00:45:42,027 --> 00:45:44,306
So we can get to
know each other.
658
00:45:44,306 --> 00:45:50,467
Oh! So you can learn my
turn-ons and turn-offs.
659
00:45:50,467 --> 00:45:52,226
Who taught you
those words?
660
00:45:52,467 --> 00:45:55,547
I have been studying
your sacred scroll.
661
00:45:55,547 --> 00:45:56,586
What do you think of it?
662
00:45:56,586 --> 00:45:58,946
Oh it is very wise, but...
663
00:45:58,946 --> 00:46:01,186
I do not understand
one thing.
664
00:46:02,906 --> 00:46:06,547
What is a... kiss?
665
00:46:07,067 --> 00:46:09,266
I'll show you tonight.
666
00:46:16,786 --> 00:46:18,346
Tell me why we are
doing this again.
667
00:46:18,346 --> 00:46:21,106
Because pterodactyl is
April's favorite food.
668
00:46:23,346 --> 00:46:24,906
It doesn't slither does it?
669
00:46:24,906 --> 00:46:26,586
SKEEMER: No! it flies.
TURBO: Whew!
670
00:46:27,786 --> 00:46:29,146
And there it is.
671
00:46:29,346 --> 00:46:31,586
[Squawking]
672
00:46:32,266 --> 00:46:35,586
Ohhh, that thing has
scales. I'm outta here!
673
00:46:35,826 --> 00:46:37,586
All right, I'm going, I'm
going, I'm going!
674
00:46:41,226 --> 00:46:43,786
Turbo, you have got to get
over this fear of yours.
675
00:46:43,786 --> 00:46:45,826
If you won't do it for
yourself, do it for June.
676
00:46:45,826 --> 00:46:47,826
I don't want to
impress June.
677
00:46:47,826 --> 00:46:50,467
Creepy crawly things
don't scare me half
as much as she does.
678
00:46:50,467 --> 00:46:51,866
I know she's
kinda tough.
679
00:46:51,866 --> 00:46:54,786
That's not what I'm
talking about Skeemer.
680
00:46:54,786 --> 00:46:56,626
What are you
talking about?
681
00:46:56,626 --> 00:47:00,666
I don't exactly have a lot
of experience with girls.
682
00:47:01,786 --> 00:47:03,706
You mean, you're still...
683
00:47:03,706 --> 00:47:05,386
cherry?
684
00:47:05,746 --> 00:47:07,306
[Laughs]
685
00:47:10,866 --> 00:47:14,106
Sorry. I just figured a
big strong guy like you.
686
00:47:14,106 --> 00:47:16,547
Girls take one look at
me, and they get scared.
687
00:47:17,027 --> 00:47:18,906
I don't blame them though.
688
00:47:18,906 --> 00:47:21,346
Who'd want to go out with
a Neanderthal like me?
689
00:47:21,346 --> 00:47:23,186
A cave woman is a
pretty safe bet.
690
00:47:23,186 --> 00:47:25,946
Besides, I think
June is kinda the
old fashioned type.
691
00:47:25,946 --> 00:47:29,186
I don't think sloping
foreheads or knuckles
that drag on the ground...
692
00:47:29,186 --> 00:47:30,906
are a problem for her.
693
00:47:31,946 --> 00:47:33,987
But what if I'm bad?
694
00:47:33,987 --> 00:47:36,507
Turbo, there aren't any
other men on this island.
695
00:47:36,507 --> 00:47:38,826
Chances are, she won't
know the difference.
696
00:47:38,826 --> 00:47:40,266
Come on.
697
00:47:44,987 --> 00:47:46,186
Rrrrahhh!
698
00:47:47,626 --> 00:47:48,586
TURBO:
Look out!
699
00:47:56,067 --> 00:47:57,306
Damn!
700
00:47:58,746 --> 00:48:00,507
Maybe we can go
get another one.
701
00:48:00,507 --> 00:48:02,027
I think I was another one
on the hill over here.
702
00:48:03,466 --> 00:48:05,586
Come on! Let's go.
703
00:48:18,786 --> 00:48:20,586
Hey! Where's
my aftershave?
704
00:48:21,106 --> 00:48:23,626
Oh... sorry John I needed
it to make a pesticide.
705
00:48:23,626 --> 00:48:26,507
It better work.
We're almost out
of dinosaur meat.
706
00:48:26,626 --> 00:48:28,706
And whose fault is that?
707
00:48:29,226 --> 00:48:32,186
Skeemer, tell the Captain
to stop picking on me.
708
00:48:32,186 --> 00:48:33,866
Look, I don't have
time for this.
709
00:48:33,866 --> 00:48:37,666
Well actually you do.
I did some tests on
the water around here.
710
00:48:38,346 --> 00:48:40,266
Just give me the
condensed version.
711
00:48:40,586 --> 00:48:42,826
Well, the water's
volcanic origin...
712
00:48:42,826 --> 00:48:45,027
gives it amazing
regenerative powers.
713
00:48:45,027 --> 00:48:47,946
Prolonged intake may
actually make the
body younger...
714
00:48:47,946 --> 00:48:49,426
and healthier forever.
715
00:48:49,426 --> 00:48:50,826
That explains your
quick healing...
716
00:48:50,826 --> 00:48:53,786
and why these dinosaurs are
still roaming the island.
717
00:48:53,786 --> 00:48:56,547
Yeah, nobody bothered to
tell them they're extinct.
718
00:48:57,266 --> 00:49:00,466
Yeah well, it also means
these women are a lot
older than we think.
719
00:49:00,466 --> 00:49:04,027
I mean, they could be
one, two, even three
thousand years old.
720
00:49:04,027 --> 00:49:06,067
Hey I've always had
thing for older women.
721
00:49:06,067 --> 00:49:07,706
So if you gentlemen
will excuse me...
722
00:49:07,706 --> 00:49:11,306
I've got a date with
the hottest prehistoric
babe I've ever met.
723
00:49:20,626 --> 00:49:23,146
How's your pterodactyl.
I caught it myself.
724
00:49:23,146 --> 00:49:25,547
Aw, how brave.
725
00:49:29,346 --> 00:49:31,226
I'm not sure.
726
00:49:31,226 --> 00:49:34,306
It tastes a little
like turtle.
727
00:49:34,547 --> 00:49:38,266
You know this place has
really gone downhill since
the new chef took over.
728
00:49:38,987 --> 00:49:42,906
I like turtle. But you.
You are not eating.
729
00:49:42,906 --> 00:49:45,507
Me? I had a late lunch.
730
00:49:49,547 --> 00:49:51,426
But aren't you
still hungry?
731
00:49:51,426 --> 00:49:52,507
Not really.
732
00:49:52,507 --> 00:49:56,426
Well then, why did you try
to press your lips to mine?
733
00:49:56,426 --> 00:49:58,626
You asked me to show
you what a kiss was.
734
00:49:58,626 --> 00:50:01,547
You'll like it. I promise.
735
00:50:04,507 --> 00:50:09,547
[Thudding footsteps]
736
00:50:09,706 --> 00:50:11,346
Did the earth move?
737
00:50:11,346 --> 00:50:13,027
I did for me.
738
00:50:16,027 --> 00:50:17,946
Dear God! The
Great One.
739
00:50:17,946 --> 00:50:19,746
Hey, I haven't even
taken it out yet.
740
00:50:20,186 --> 00:50:23,826
[Roaring]
741
00:50:23,946 --> 00:50:25,826
Oh! That Great One!
742
00:50:27,346 --> 00:50:28,906
APRIL:
This way!
743
00:50:37,746 --> 00:50:40,946
APRIL: [Screams]
SKEEMER: Ohhhh shit!
744
00:50:51,626 --> 00:50:53,266
Here, we can
hide in here.
745
00:51:11,626 --> 00:51:13,466
That ought to hold him.
746
00:51:14,706 --> 00:51:18,146
SKEEMER:
[Kung Fu noises]
747
00:51:18,186 --> 00:51:23,746
[Roaring]
748
00:51:23,826 --> 00:51:28,906
[Receding footsteps]
749
00:51:29,746 --> 00:51:31,386
Woulda kicked his ass.
750
00:51:35,266 --> 00:51:38,027
You know, this would
make a great condo.
We could settle down.
751
00:51:38,027 --> 00:51:41,586
No, no, this is a terrible
place! We must go no further.
752
00:51:41,586 --> 00:51:45,027
Why is that. Got plenty
of room. Hot and cold
running slime.
753
00:51:45,706 --> 00:51:47,786
Look at this.
754
00:51:50,746 --> 00:51:52,306
Just my luck...
755
00:51:53,306 --> 00:51:55,067
Gold!
756
00:52:03,826 --> 00:52:06,067
It is not safe to go
on, we must turn back.
757
00:52:06,067 --> 00:52:07,226
Don't wet yourself
sweetheart.
758
00:52:07,226 --> 00:52:08,706
I just need a couple
more gold nuggets...
759
00:52:08,706 --> 00:52:12,146
to make the down payment
on that little Malibu beach
house I've had my eye on.
760
00:52:12,946 --> 00:52:14,266
But the beast
of the cave!
761
00:52:14,266 --> 00:52:15,906
Surely it will hear us!
762
00:52:15,906 --> 00:52:16,987
Beast!
763
00:52:17,346 --> 00:52:19,186
You didn't say anything
about a beast.
764
00:52:19,186 --> 00:52:20,906
You wouldn't let me!
765
00:52:21,586 --> 00:52:22,946
What does he look like?
766
00:52:22,946 --> 00:52:25,906
[Gibbering]
767
00:52:25,906 --> 00:52:27,226
Sounds like...
768
00:52:27,226 --> 00:52:28,306
two words.
769
00:52:28,426 --> 00:52:29,426
SKEEMER:
Big!
770
00:52:29,507 --> 00:52:31,027
SKEEMER:
Hideous!
771
00:52:32,786 --> 00:52:34,266
Behind me?
772
00:52:34,266 --> 00:52:36,226
[Screams]
773
00:52:39,426 --> 00:52:41,266
[Growling]
774
00:52:42,067 --> 00:52:43,306
APRIL:
[Screams]
775
00:52:44,746 --> 00:52:45,946
APRIL:
[Screams]
776
00:52:50,226 --> 00:52:52,626
Ah! Ah! Ah!
777
00:52:54,346 --> 00:52:54,987
[Screams]
778
00:52:59,226 --> 00:53:01,466
[Screams]
779
00:53:01,987 --> 00:53:02,626
Ah! Ah!
780
00:53:05,626 --> 00:53:07,146
Ah! Aaagh!
781
00:53:08,106 --> 00:53:10,946
[Howl]
782
00:53:36,786 --> 00:53:38,106
Shh!
783
00:53:39,426 --> 00:53:41,946
Come with me.
784
00:53:59,547 --> 00:54:00,426
Go!
785
00:54:00,666 --> 00:54:01,786
Go!
786
00:54:02,186 --> 00:54:02,987
Neal!
787
00:54:03,346 --> 00:54:04,186
Neal!
788
00:54:06,666 --> 00:54:08,027
Ahh.
789
00:54:08,186 --> 00:54:10,386
You are the one
called Captain.
790
00:54:10,386 --> 00:54:11,666
Are you not?
791
00:54:11,666 --> 00:54:14,027
What the hell's
going on here.
792
00:54:14,027 --> 00:54:16,186
Our culture has an
ancient proverb...
793
00:54:16,186 --> 00:54:19,226
that says my enemy's
enemy is my friend.
794
00:54:19,226 --> 00:54:20,906
I have been
observing you.
795
00:54:20,906 --> 00:54:22,946
I believe you to
be such a person.
796
00:54:22,946 --> 00:54:24,547
Lady, that's what I've
been trying to tell you...
797
00:54:24,547 --> 00:54:26,106
since we got stranded here.
798
00:54:26,106 --> 00:54:28,826
And if I could provide you
with a way off the island...
799
00:54:28,826 --> 00:54:30,266
you would take the
others with you.
800
00:54:30,266 --> 00:54:31,426
Would you not?
801
00:54:32,466 --> 00:54:33,866
You can count on it.
802
00:54:34,426 --> 00:54:38,586
Many moons ago, a
great silver bird
crashed into the ocean.
803
00:54:38,586 --> 00:54:41,986
A crate filled with strange
objects washed ashore.
804
00:54:41,986 --> 00:54:43,466
What kind of objects.
805
00:54:43,466 --> 00:54:45,626
Objects I'd never
seen before.
806
00:54:48,106 --> 00:54:50,946
But one of them carried
voices from far away.
807
00:54:52,706 --> 00:54:54,266
You have a transmitter.
808
00:54:54,266 --> 00:54:58,226
The voices I heard
spoke in a language
unlike yours or ours.
809
00:54:58,226 --> 00:55:00,027
Where is this crate?
810
00:55:00,786 --> 00:55:03,986
This map will guide you
to where it is buried.
811
00:55:06,826 --> 00:55:08,106
Buried?
812
00:55:12,626 --> 00:55:16,146
Have you girls got
any shovels to go
with those spears?
813
00:55:36,386 --> 00:55:38,067
I guess he
took a power.
814
00:55:38,266 --> 00:55:39,386
It is safe.
815
00:55:39,386 --> 00:55:41,666
I wonder what
made him so mad.
816
00:55:42,546 --> 00:55:44,386
I think I know.
817
00:56:05,226 --> 00:56:06,666
Wow!
818
00:56:06,666 --> 00:56:08,546
Look at the size
of that egg!
819
00:56:08,546 --> 00:56:10,507
We must've gotten too
close to her nest.
820
00:56:10,507 --> 00:56:11,306
Her!
821
00:56:11,306 --> 00:56:13,186
You mean the Great
One is a girl?
822
00:56:13,186 --> 00:56:15,586
Let us go. We must not be
here when she comes back.
823
00:56:15,586 --> 00:56:17,386
Wait a minute! What
about that egg?
824
00:56:17,386 --> 00:56:18,626
What about it?
825
00:56:18,626 --> 00:56:20,666
It would make one hell
of a Denver Omelet!
826
00:56:25,946 --> 00:56:27,146
Slow down.
827
00:56:27,146 --> 00:56:28,266
I need a breather.
828
00:56:28,626 --> 00:56:30,746
No we must
hurry, we must!
829
00:56:30,746 --> 00:56:33,466
You must. I'm
taking a breather.
830
00:56:36,706 --> 00:56:38,386
Can I ask
you a question?
831
00:56:38,386 --> 00:56:39,426
Shoot.
832
00:56:39,426 --> 00:56:40,986
In a few minutes.
833
00:56:41,507 --> 00:56:44,067
Do you know where
dinosaur eggs come from?
834
00:56:44,067 --> 00:56:46,186
Doesn't the pterodactyl
bring them?
835
00:56:48,266 --> 00:56:50,547
Let me cut
to the chase.
836
00:56:58,586 --> 00:57:00,626
But these
are not eggs.
837
00:57:00,626 --> 00:57:03,426
I know, but over
easy or scrambled...
838
00:57:03,426 --> 00:57:05,746
they look like
breakfast to me.
839
00:58:46,586 --> 00:58:48,067
Wayne look!
840
00:58:48,426 --> 00:58:50,426
We are saved
from starvation.
841
00:58:50,426 --> 00:58:52,706
The food has grown
in great abundance.
842
00:58:52,706 --> 00:58:55,666
Wow! It's better than all
you can eat nights Sizzler.
843
00:58:56,106 --> 00:58:57,426
It's truly a miracle.
844
00:58:57,426 --> 00:58:59,426
But how can it
have grown so fast?
845
00:58:59,626 --> 00:59:00,826
There's something
in that water.
846
00:59:00,826 --> 00:59:02,626
Who cares! Lets eat!
847
00:59:03,786 --> 00:59:04,866
JUNE:
Eat! Eat!
848
00:59:52,547 --> 00:59:55,226
Wayne, your
magic worked.
849
00:59:55,547 --> 00:59:58,866
May, I told you. It's not
magic. It's chemistry.
850
00:59:58,866 --> 01:00:00,386
Must be very powerful.
851
01:00:00,386 --> 01:00:01,466
It is.
852
01:00:01,906 --> 01:00:04,866
But there's another
kind of chemistry that's
even more powerful.
853
01:00:04,866 --> 01:00:07,466
It's the chemistry
between two people.
854
01:00:07,507 --> 01:00:09,507
I do not understand.
855
01:00:09,626 --> 01:00:11,346
Well sometimes, when
two people meet...
856
01:00:11,346 --> 01:00:13,266
they have this effect
on each other.
857
01:00:13,266 --> 01:00:15,946
What kind of effect?
858
01:00:15,946 --> 01:00:18,986
Well for instance, their
hearts beat faster.
859
01:00:18,986 --> 01:00:21,226
Will you show me?
860
01:00:21,426 --> 01:00:23,306
I'd love to.
861
01:00:28,706 --> 01:00:30,547
Is this chemistry?
862
01:00:31,507 --> 01:00:34,106
No this is magic.
863
01:01:14,626 --> 01:01:16,306
TURBO:
This fruit is
really good Wayne.
864
01:01:16,506 --> 01:01:18,346
TURBO:
Oh, is that for me?
865
01:01:18,986 --> 01:01:20,426
BRAIN:
The red one, green one.
866
01:01:20,547 --> 01:01:21,666
I'm telling you guys.
867
01:01:21,666 --> 01:01:23,866
This cave we found is
crawling with gold.
868
01:01:23,866 --> 01:01:25,067
Yeah, and according
to April...
869
01:01:25,067 --> 01:01:26,626
it's also crawling
with monsters.
870
01:01:26,706 --> 01:01:27,746
No big deal.
871
01:01:27,746 --> 01:01:30,146
I had him eating spear,
right out of my hand.
872
01:01:30,146 --> 01:01:32,946
You can have your gold.
This is the life for me.
873
01:01:32,946 --> 01:01:34,226
I hear you.
874
01:01:34,226 --> 01:01:35,266
You will come with us.
875
01:01:35,266 --> 01:01:37,106
The Queen awaits you
in her throne room.
876
01:01:37,106 --> 01:01:37,866
Again!
877
01:01:37,866 --> 01:01:38,626
What now?
878
01:01:38,626 --> 01:01:39,746
I'm booked till four.
879
01:01:39,746 --> 01:01:40,946
Come!
880
01:01:55,786 --> 01:01:58,266
It has come to my
attention, that the
three of you...
881
01:01:58,266 --> 01:01:59,906
have feelings for
these men.
882
01:01:59,906 --> 01:02:01,746
It is true oh Queen.
883
01:02:01,746 --> 01:02:03,666
Is that why you
brought us here?
884
01:02:03,666 --> 01:02:05,706
We would like to ask
you for your blessing.
885
01:02:05,706 --> 01:02:07,266
My blessing!
886
01:02:07,266 --> 01:02:09,386
April and I want
to get married.
887
01:02:09,386 --> 01:02:12,186
But May and I just thought
we'd live together first.
888
01:02:12,186 --> 01:02:15,706
June and I, we just
want to go steady.
889
01:02:15,786 --> 01:02:19,226
What you ask is
not possible.
890
01:02:19,266 --> 01:02:20,466
Why not?
891
01:02:20,466 --> 01:02:23,866
These girls are the
oldest in the village,
they're next in line.
892
01:02:23,866 --> 01:02:24,986
For the throne?
893
01:02:24,986 --> 01:02:26,386
For the alter.
894
01:02:26,386 --> 01:02:27,466
That's what we're
talking about.
895
01:02:27,466 --> 01:02:28,866
Getting a little
cave of our own.
896
01:02:28,866 --> 01:02:29,866
Tar pit in
the back yard.
897
01:02:29,866 --> 01:02:31,386
Having a couple
of Cro-Magnons.
898
01:02:31,386 --> 01:02:33,106
Becoming fossils together.
899
01:02:33,106 --> 01:02:35,706
Not the alter of
marriage, you fool.
900
01:02:36,106 --> 01:02:38,027
The alter of
sacrifice.
901
01:02:38,027 --> 01:02:40,306
Ssssacrifice?
902
01:02:40,306 --> 01:02:43,426
Every time the Sun
crosses the sea and
reaches its zenith...
903
01:02:43,426 --> 01:02:46,146
we must sacrifice a
virgin to the Great One.
904
01:02:46,146 --> 01:02:49,106
Wait a minute. You mean
you actually feed your
people to that thing?
905
01:02:49,106 --> 01:02:50,106
If I don't...
906
01:02:50,106 --> 01:02:52,706
the beast will come
to the village to
satisfy its hunger.
907
01:02:52,706 --> 01:02:54,547
And then we
would all die.
908
01:02:54,547 --> 01:02:55,507
Queen Morganna...
909
01:02:55,507 --> 01:02:57,946
do you really think the
Great One really cares
whether or not he...
910
01:02:57,946 --> 01:02:59,386
eats a virgin?
911
01:02:59,386 --> 01:03:01,306
It never bothered
me before.
912
01:03:02,106 --> 01:03:03,346
It didn't.
913
01:03:03,426 --> 01:03:04,946
It is our way.
914
01:03:04,946 --> 01:03:07,706
As is dictated by
the sacred scroll.
915
01:03:08,466 --> 01:03:10,786
But that's just
ancient superstition!
916
01:03:10,786 --> 01:03:14,986
It is the same
superstition that has
proclaimed you, as gods.
917
01:03:14,986 --> 01:03:18,226
Well, then again, a sacred
scroll is a sacred scroll.
918
01:03:19,266 --> 01:03:21,986
Only when you have proven
yourselves worthy...
919
01:03:21,986 --> 01:03:23,706
will I give
you my blessing.
920
01:03:23,706 --> 01:03:24,986
How do we do that?
921
01:03:25,746 --> 01:03:27,186
Oh it's really
quite simple.
922
01:03:27,186 --> 01:03:29,786
All you have to do is
destroy the Great One.
923
01:03:29,786 --> 01:03:31,226
Just bring me his head...
924
01:03:31,226 --> 01:03:35,306
and then you can all
live happily ever after.
925
01:03:37,266 --> 01:03:38,946
[Laughs]
926
01:03:45,706 --> 01:03:47,186
Destroy the
Great One!
927
01:03:47,186 --> 01:03:47,786
While we're at it...
928
01:03:47.786 --> 01:03:49.746
why don't we melt the
Wicked Witch of the West.
929
01:03:49,746 --> 01:03:51,826
Well, whatever we do,
we'd better do it fast.
930
01:03:51,826 --> 01:03:54,146
I think we was talking about
the spring equinox...
931
01:03:54,146 --> 01:03:56,346
which is only
three days away.
932
01:03:56,346 --> 01:03:57,786
So now what do we do?
933
01:03:57,786 --> 01:03:58,866
I don't know
about you guys...
934
01:03:58,866 --> 01:04:01,226
but I've already taken April
out of the competition.
935
01:04:01,666 --> 01:04:02,306
What do you mean?
936
01:04:02,306 --> 01:04:06,067
Hey, every schoolboy
knows, April comes
before May or June.
937
01:04:06,067 --> 01:04:07,586
Oh, you gotta
be kidding me!
938
01:04:07,646 --> 01:04:09,826
Well I hate to
admit it, but...
939
01:04:09,826 --> 01:04:11,146
Oh, not you too!
940
01:04:11,146 --> 01:04:13,906
Sorry big guy. It was too
good of an opportunity
to pass up.
941
01:04:13,906 --> 01:04:16,547
Oh, so now your
saying it's up to me.
942
01:04:16,586 --> 01:04:18,386
Well it's a
big no go.
943
01:04:18,386 --> 01:04:20,466
I'm not doin' nothin'
till I'm ready.
944
01:04:21,306 --> 01:04:23,066
But I'm telling you this...
945
01:04:23,066 --> 01:04:27,106
I'm tied of running scared
on this island from some
big overgrown lizard.
946
01:04:27,106 --> 01:04:32,226
I say it's time I
stopped cowering, and
kicked some monster ass!
947
01:04:34,666 --> 01:04:35,706
You guys with me?
948
01:04:35,706 --> 01:04:37,626
Hey, I'm willing to
do whatever it takes.
949
01:04:37,626 --> 01:04:39,506
But where are we going
to get the fire power?
950
01:04:39,547 --> 01:04:41,067
Right here boys.
951
01:04:45,506 --> 01:04:48,186
Now let's snap to. We've
got bigger fish to fry.
952
01:04:57,027 --> 01:04:58,226
Who wants these?
953
01:05:22,826 --> 01:05:25,706
I have provided
you with the weapons
you have requested...
954
01:05:25,706 --> 01:05:27,506
and now it
is up to you.
955
01:05:27,506 --> 01:05:29,626
If you do not return
within two days...
956
01:05:29,626 --> 01:05:32,946
we will have no choice
but to sacrifice
one of our own...
957
01:05:32,946 --> 01:05:34,506
to the Great One.
958
01:05:34,506 --> 01:05:35,666
Don't worry ma'am.
959
01:05:35,946 --> 01:05:37,706
We'll be back.
960
01:05:37,706 --> 01:05:40,067
I wish you
luck, Captain.
961
01:05:47,986 --> 01:05:50,067
Looks like Briggs
is getting engaged.
962
01:05:53,586 --> 01:05:54,426
TURBO:
[Low whistle]
963
01:05:55,027 --> 01:05:56,866
Even Briggs can get
laid on this island.
964
01:05:56,866 --> 01:05:58,306
Let's move it out.
965
01:06:08,866 --> 01:06:11,507
So these missionaries
are the ones who taught
you to speak English?
966
01:06:11,507 --> 01:06:13,106
Why yes, that's
it exactly.
967
01:06:13,106 --> 01:06:13,706
TURBO:
Hey!
968
01:06:13,706 --> 01:06:14,506
BRAIN:
Now what?
969
01:06:14,506 --> 01:06:16,626
TURBO:
Quiet! Over There!
970
01:06:22,786 --> 01:06:25,146
Is it harmless like
the one we saw before?
971
01:06:25,146 --> 01:06:26,906
Yes it's a
thunderbeast.
972
01:06:26,906 --> 01:06:28,986
Harmless hmmmph!
973
01:06:29,506 --> 01:06:30,866
Yeah harmless.
974
01:06:31,386 --> 01:06:33,426
So Skeemer, you've
seen this Great One.
975
01:06:33,426 --> 01:06:34,547
What was it like?
976
01:06:34,547 --> 01:06:38,346
Well, you remember that
transvestite hooker that
Turbo tried to pick up
on in the Philippines?
977
01:06:38,346 --> 01:06:39,506
Hey! Hey! Hey!
978
01:06:40,626 --> 01:06:44,106
Well it was as ugly as that,
but bigger and pissed off.
979
01:06:44,106 --> 01:06:46,346
So where does this
beauty make it's home?
980
01:06:46,546 --> 01:06:48,346
It lives by
the big cave.
981
01:06:48,346 --> 01:06:49,706
The one with
the gold in it?
982
01:06:49,906 --> 01:06:50,906
The same.
983
01:06:51,986 --> 01:06:53,027
Lead on.
984
01:07:41,706 --> 01:07:43,546
SKEEMER:
Here's where it
gets interesting.
985
01:07:43,546 --> 01:07:45,866
TURBO:
Captain, will
you look at that!
986
01:07:45,866 --> 01:07:47,146
My God!
987
01:07:47,146 --> 01:07:49,226
Think of the
cholesterol!
988
01:07:54,106 --> 01:07:56,426
Let's take cover
in the cave.
989
01:07:58,906 --> 01:08:01,386
Let's not make a meal
out of that Private.
990
01:08:17,747 --> 01:08:19,626
You will not find
the Great One in there.
991
01:08:19,626 --> 01:08:21,506
She is much too big.
992
01:08:21,947 --> 01:08:25,066
This looks like a good
place to get up camp
until he comes back.
993
01:08:25,066 --> 01:08:27,546
Turbo! See if you can
find some firewood.
994
01:08:27,546 --> 01:08:28,666
Yes Captain.
995
01:08:30,586 --> 01:08:32,786
The rest of you take
cover in the cave.
996
01:08:32,786 --> 01:08:34,786
You never know when
mom will come home.
997
01:08:34,786 --> 01:08:37,827
She's probably just picking
up a few things for dinner.
998
01:08:37,827 --> 01:08:39,827
I'll take first watch.
999
01:08:51,466 --> 01:08:53,506
TURBO:
Pretty good
huh Captain?
1000
01:08:53,906 --> 01:08:55,346
CAPTAIN:
Keep it going Private.
1001
01:08:56,027 --> 01:08:58,146
CAPTAIN:
It's going to
be dark soon.
1002
01:08:58,146 --> 01:09:00,747
CAPTAIN:
And I think staying in here
is going to be our best bet.
1003
01:09:00,747 --> 01:09:02,907
This'll keep the
riff-raff out.
1004
01:09:02,987 --> 01:09:05,386
Those big lizards still
give be the shakes.
1005
01:09:05,386 --> 01:09:06,586
You think
that's something?
1006
01:09:06,827 --> 01:09:09,586
There was this bimbo actress
I was dating back in L.A..
1007
01:09:09,586 --> 01:09:10,867
What a piece.
1008
01:09:10,867 --> 01:09:12,827
Almost married
her too.
1009
01:09:12,827 --> 01:09:14,867
Then I got a look
at her mother.
1010
01:09:14,947 --> 01:09:17,626
Holy mackerel,
what a puss on her.
1011
01:09:17,987 --> 01:09:20,106
I'd rather look at
the great one any day.
1012
01:09:20,106 --> 01:09:23,266
They say, if you want to
know what a girl will look
like after she's married...
1013
01:09:23,266 --> 01:09:24,907
look at her mother.
1014
01:09:24,907 --> 01:09:26,346
Is that true Skeemer?
1015
01:09:26,346 --> 01:09:27,586
That's what I heard.
1016
01:09:28,827 --> 01:09:30,106
Say June...
1017
01:09:31,106 --> 01:09:32,746
Was your mother
pretty?
1018
01:09:33,746 --> 01:09:35,787
I bet she was.
1019
01:09:36,626 --> 01:09:37,987
Come.
1020
01:09:37,987 --> 01:09:40,426
Let us go for walk.
1021
01:09:42,027 --> 01:09:43,027
Private.
1022
01:09:43,027 --> 01:09:45,266
Let's not walk too
far from the light.
1023
01:09:45,266 --> 01:09:46,947
Yes sir.
1024
01:10:17,426 --> 01:10:18,746
What are you
looking at?
1025
01:10:18,746 --> 01:10:19,947
The moon.
1026
01:10:19,947 --> 01:10:21,787
It is crossing
over the ocean.
1027
01:10:21,787 --> 01:10:22,987
Yeah.
1028
01:10:26,186 --> 01:10:27,666
You know...
1029
01:10:27,666 --> 01:10:29,546
if you do not kill
the Great One...
1030
01:10:29,546 --> 01:10:31,626
I will be its
next sacrifice.
1031
01:10:31,626 --> 01:10:32,987
Oh you don't
have to!
1032
01:10:33,626 --> 01:10:35,146
There's um...
1033
01:10:35,146 --> 01:10:36,666
another way.
1034
01:10:36,666 --> 01:10:37,746
Oh no!
1035
01:10:37,746 --> 01:10:41,306
I could never dishonor
my heritage by doing
what my sisters did.
1036
01:10:41,306 --> 01:10:42,947
You're scared.
1037
01:10:42,947 --> 01:10:45,306
The Great One
doesn't frighten me.
1038
01:10:45,306 --> 01:10:46,226
No.
1039
01:10:46,226 --> 01:10:47,987
But I think I do.
1040
01:10:47,987 --> 01:10:49,426
You?
1041
01:10:49,506 --> 01:10:53,546
You'd rather give
yourself to the Great
One, than to me.
1042
01:10:54,106 --> 01:10:55,466
It is true.
1043
01:10:55,466 --> 01:10:57,867
I have never known
a man before.
1044
01:10:57,867 --> 01:10:59,506
Neither have I!
1045
01:10:59,506 --> 01:11:00,867
Well there was that
one time in Manila.
1046
01:11:00,867 --> 01:11:01,906
What?
1047
01:11:01,906 --> 01:11:04,306
I mean... I've never
known a girl before.
1048
01:11:04,306 --> 01:11:06,706
I mean I've known
girls but I, I...
1049
01:11:06,706 --> 01:11:09,226
I've never
known girls.
1050
01:11:09,226 --> 01:11:10,186
You know?
1051
01:11:10,907 --> 01:11:13,266
Then... you
are like me.
1052
01:11:13,306 --> 01:11:15,067
Yeah.
1053
01:11:15,506 --> 01:11:17,346
Scared.
1054
01:11:29,027 --> 01:11:30,426
Well?
1055
01:11:30,426 --> 01:11:32,306
What do you think?
1056
01:11:32,306 --> 01:11:37,106
I, I, I, I, I, I, I...
1057
01:11:37,106 --> 01:11:39,346
I am really scared.
1058
01:12:10,586 --> 01:12:12,666
[Dinosaur laughs]
1059
01:12:32,146 --> 01:12:34,386
and then, she
chased you...
1060
01:12:35,306 --> 01:12:36,827
APRIL:
and you ran into...
1061
01:12:36,827 --> 01:12:38,106
Wait! Wait! Wait!
Skip over that part.
1062
01:12:39,386 --> 01:12:40,506
How's it going?
1063
01:12:40,506 --> 01:12:41,506
SKEEMER:
Pretty spooky Cap.
1064
01:12:41,506 --> 01:12:43,706
These stones and
bones know everything.
1065
01:12:43,706 --> 01:12:45,867
SKEEMER:
She's got them telling
my whole life story.
1066
01:12:46,746 --> 01:12:48,987
You think that's suitable
for mixed company?
1067
01:12:49,666 --> 01:12:51,867
Maybe I'd better change
the subject, huh?
1068
01:12:52,386 --> 01:12:54,067
Very interesting Skeemer.
1069
01:12:54,067 --> 01:12:56,186
But I think it's your
turn to stand guard duty.
1070
01:12:56,706 --> 01:12:59,346
Now go find Turbo and
bring him back if you can.
1071
01:12:59,426 --> 01:13:02,266
There's certainly
no future in that.
1072
01:13:06,546 --> 01:13:08,586
You know, trouble with
being a regular army...
1073
01:13:08,586 --> 01:13:10,186
is that you're always
sticking your neck out...
1074
01:13:10,186 --> 01:13:12,546
while the girls are
sitting comfy back at home.
1075
01:13:13,786 --> 01:13:15,906
I'll bet they're
kicking back right now...
1076
01:13:15,906 --> 01:13:18,506
with a big bowl
of strawberries.
1077
01:13:18,506 --> 01:13:20,106
[Roaring and screams]
1078
01:13:20,706 --> 01:13:27,466
[Roaring]
1079
01:13:27,466 --> 01:13:30,586
[Shouts]
1080
01:13:51,346 --> 01:13:52,027
[Screaming]
1081
01:13:53,226 --> 01:13:54,146
[Screaming]
1082
01:14:14,226 --> 01:14:15,906
CAPTAIN:
Well it looks
like a no show.
1083
01:14:15,906 --> 01:14:17,626
SKEEMER:
She's probably
out on a bender.
1084
01:14:17,626 --> 01:14:19,106
BRAIN:
She might not
even come back.
1085
01:14:19,106 --> 01:14:20,106
APRIL:
She will
come back.
1086
01:14:20,106 --> 01:14:21,146
APRIL:
She's a mother.
1087
01:14:21,146 --> 01:14:22,466
TURBO:
You can say
that again.
1088
01:14:24,146 --> 01:14:26,706
There must be
something we can do
to bring her around.
1089
01:14:26,706 --> 01:14:28,346
Any ideas Kincaid?
1090
01:14:28,346 --> 01:14:30,226
Yeah Brain, think
of something.
1091
01:14:30,266 --> 01:14:32,186
Well, I have an
idea that might work.
1092
01:14:32,186 --> 01:14:33,626
But it's a
little risky.
1093
01:14:33,626 --> 01:14:36,706
Risky physically or
risky... financially?
1094
01:14:37,786 --> 01:14:39,867
What have you got
in mind Kincaid?
1095
01:14:39,946 --> 01:14:42,746
Here, I'll diagram
it out for you.
1096
01:14:47,666 --> 01:14:53,426
[Screams]
1097
01:14:53,426 --> 01:14:59,067
JUNE:
[Screams]
1098
01:15:01,186 --> 01:15:02,266
TURBO:
Hope this works.
1099
01:15:02,266 --> 01:15:03,947
SKEEMER:
Don't worry.
It will.
1100
01:15:08,226 --> 01:15:10,067
Quiet, I think
I hear something.
1101
01:15:11,786 --> 01:15:17,146
[Thudding footsteps]
1102
01:15:20,827 --> 01:15:23,746
[Screams]
1103
01:15:24,306 --> 01:15:30,987
[Roaring]
1104
01:15:33,746 --> 01:15:35,426
CAPTAIN:
Come on,
let's move!
1105
01:15:36,626 --> 01:15:42,746
JUNE: [Screams]
DINOSAUR: [Roars]
1106
01:16:09,947 --> 01:16:12,146
CAPTAIN:
Die you
dinosaur dick!
1107
01:16:20,306 --> 01:16:22,426
One of these days...
1108
01:16:25,386 --> 01:16:27,306
Ho! Right in
the kisser!
1109
01:16:34,786 --> 01:16:35,867
CAPTAIN:
Damn it!
You did it!
1110
01:16:35,867 --> 01:16:36,746
TURBO:
I did?
1111
01:16:36,746 --> 01:16:37,867
SKEEMER:
You did it!
1112
01:16:37,947 --> 01:16:39,907
[Cheers]
1113
01:16:42,827 --> 01:16:43,987
[Cheers]
1114
01:16:46,987 --> 01:16:48,987
CAPTAIN:
Come on, we've got to
make a meal out of this thing...
1115
01:16:48,987 --> 01:16:50,827
we've got a
village to feed.
1116
01:16:58,907 --> 01:17:00,827
And so, by
my authority...
1117
01:17:00,827 --> 01:17:02,306
as queen of
this island...
1118
01:17:02,306 --> 01:17:05,466
I now pronounce you,
caveman and wife.
1119
01:17:05,466 --> 01:17:07,827
You may kiss
the princess.
1120
01:17:12,666 --> 01:17:13,826
Well Skeemer...
1121
01:17:13,826 --> 01:17:16,586
I guess you won't have
to face that trial I was
taking you back to.
1122
01:17:16,586 --> 01:17:19,146
I've still got the
old ball and chain, if
you know what I mean.
1123
01:17:19,146 --> 01:17:21,067
I guess that's
punishment enough.
1124
01:17:29,626 --> 01:17:30,586
BRAIN:
Where have you been?
1125
01:17:30,586 --> 01:17:32,746
We had some celebrating
of our own to do.
1126
01:17:32,746 --> 01:17:34,466
I was a bad boy.
1127
01:17:35,386 --> 01:17:38,226
April, is polygamy
legal on this island?
1128
01:17:42,426 --> 01:17:43,426
Captain...
1129
01:17:43,426 --> 01:17:46,706
I just want to tell you
how brave I thought
you were in battle.
1130
01:17:46,706 --> 01:17:48,546
Why thank you very
much, your Majesty.
1131
01:17:48,546 --> 01:17:51,346
I've never seen a warrior
with such strength.
1132
01:17:51,586 --> 01:17:53,947
It's too bad you
wish to leave us.
1133
01:17:53,947 --> 01:17:55,066
It is?
1134
01:17:55,066 --> 01:17:57,386
This tribe could
use a king.
1135
01:17:59,186 --> 01:18:01,426
Well, since you
put it that way.
1136
01:18:09,186 --> 01:18:10,426
What does
this mean?
1137
01:18:10,426 --> 01:18:13,987
It means we get to live
happily forever after.
1138
01:18:28,386 --> 01:18:35,066
[Laughs]
74934
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