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� OS FILMES DA MINHA VIDA �
COM�DIA - 1966
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00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:22,312
N�O PERCA A CABE�A�(1966)
? N�o perca a cabe�a
2
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:27,110
N�O PERCA A CABE�A (1966)
? N�o perca a cabe�a, quando voc�
n�o pode pagar seus impostos
3
00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:31,080
? N�o perca a cabe�a, quando est�o
triturando seus machados
4
00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:34,756
? Tente ficar calmo quando
a cabe�a estiver no bloco
5
00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:38,595
? Voc� pode estar em
um choque desagrad�vel
6
00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:42,469
? N�o perca a cabe�a,
segure sua peruca
7
00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:46,315
? Sorria quando o
sepulturista come�a a cavar
8
00:00:46,400 --> 00:00:50,155
? N�o perca a cabe�a,
voc� chegar� no final
9
00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:53,756
? N�o perca a cabe�a, meu amigo
10
00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:59,795
? N�o perca a cabe�a, quando
est�o gritando por sangue
11
00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:03,317
? N�o perca a cabe�a,
ou seu nome ser� lama
12
00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:07,155
? Voc� est� pedindo problemas
se voc� n�o tem cabe�a
13
00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:11,120
? Porque, quando voc�
acordar, voc� estar� morto
14
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:14,955
? N�o perca a cabe�a, quando o
mundo estiver no seu pior
15
00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:18,636
? N�o perca a cabe�a
quando a bolha estourou
16
00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:22,509
? N�o perca a cabe�a,
voc� chegar� no final
17
00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:26,037
? N�o perca a cabe�a, meu amigo
18
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:28,077
? A Marseillaise
19
00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:33,791
? N�o perca a cabe�a, meu amigo
20
00:01:33,880 --> 00:01:37,760
Paris. 1789.
A Grande Revolu��o come�ou. I>
21
00:01:37,840 --> 00:01:42,232
As m�os das massas s�o manchadas i>
com o sangue da pobre aristocracia sangrenta. i>
22
00:01:42,320 --> 00:01:44,551
Os tumbrels funcionam com
um servi�o regular de meia hora i>
23
00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:47,838
entre a Bastilha e as muitas i>
guilhotinas ao redor da cidade. i>
24
00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:49,877
Os montes crescentes
de cabe�as nobres i>
25
00:01:49,960 --> 00:01:53,715
s�o apenas correspondentes
aos montes crescentes de ingressos i>
de retorno n�o utilizados. i>
26
00:01:53,800 --> 00:01:57,350
Ningu�m � poupado. Madame
La Guillotine reivindica todos eles. i>
27
00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:00,399
duques e duquesas. i>
senhores e senhoras. homens e mulheres ... i>
28
00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:01,960
de ambos os sexos. i>
29
00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:03,520
uma d�zia de vezes por hora. i>
30
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:05,831
os tambores rolam. a l�mina cai. i>
31
00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:07,274
e as cabe�as rolam.
32
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:10,432
Sim, a cada cinco minutos,
uma l�mina rec�m-cortada.
33
00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:15,231
E l�. como sempre. assistindo severamente i>
os resultados de suas maquina��es do mal, i>
34
00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:20,395
mantendo um olhar atento para filhotes-jumpers. i>
� o homem mais temido de toda a Fran�a. i>
35
00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,757
Chefe da Pol�cia Secreta de Robespierre i>
Citizen Camembert. i>
36
00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:25,399
Eurgh! i>
37
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:28,632
E ao lado dele, como sempre, i>
mantendo o contato com a colheita sombria, i>
38
00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:32,350
seu assistente n�mero um, i>
toadying Citizen Bidet. i>
40
00:02:37,480 --> 00:02:41,360
Eu disse cabe�as, n�o caudas.
O miser�vel aristo est� no caminho errado.
42
00:02:45,560 --> 00:02:50,237
- Que Malabonce n�o sabe a cabe�a dele ...
- N�o importa tudo isso. Ele ter� que aller. I>
43
00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,630
- Eh?
- Ele ter� que ir.
47
00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:10,830
E a pr�xima, s'il vous pla�t.
51
00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,196
- O que � um corte.
- Repugnante.
52
00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:02,875
- O que senhor?
- Aquele �ltimo teve um trapaceiro terr�vel.
53
00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:04,713
Esterilize a l�mina!
54
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:07,269
- Voc� n�o pode ser muito cuidadoso.
- Eu concordo, cidad�o.
55
00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:09,875
- Senhor!
- Desculpa. Cidad�o, senhor.
56
00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:12,270
Isso � melhor. Qual � o recorde para hoje?
57
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:14,670
Er ... 26 cabe�a de aristo.
58
00:04:14,760 --> 00:04:16,717
Ooh, isso � muito bom.
59
00:04:16,800 --> 00:04:18,757
Continue escolhendo!
60
00:04:18,840 --> 00:04:20,513
? Rule Britannia
61
00:04:20,600 --> 00:04:25,311
Enquanto isso. do outro lado do Canal. i>
longe da terr�vel cena de carnificina. i>
62
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:29,679
as acolhedoras casas de Inglaterra i>
toque com alegria, risada despreocupada, i>
63
00:04:29,760 --> 00:04:32,195
e satisfeitos ap�s o jantar. i>
64
00:04:32,280 --> 00:04:37,071
como a aristocracia, inconsciente dos horrores i>
enfrentando seus hom�logos na Fran�a, i>
65
00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:41,234
continuam com seu normal e elegante i>
atividades do pa�s. i>
66
00:04:41,320 --> 00:04:43,277
Hunting.
67
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:50,157
And, of course, shooting.
68
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:07,229
Not to mention the most pleasurable of them all.
69
00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:09,277
Fishing.
70
00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:26,790
No-one indulged in these pleasuresmore diligently and energetically
71
00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:30,760
than two of society'smost distinguished and fashionable layabouts -
72
00:05:30,840 --> 00:05:33,799
the powdered, bewigged,beribboned Sir Rodney Ffing,
73
00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:35,439
with two Fs,
74
00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:39,400
and his inseparable companion.Lord Darcy Pue.
75
00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:49,991
- Good day, gentlemen.
- (Lisps) Good day? I suppose so.
76
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:53,312
(Sighs) It's all a monstrous bore.
What say you, Darcy, my dear?
77
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,393
- Definitely the same old round.
- Same old people.
78
00:05:56,480 --> 00:05:59,075
- Same old girls.
- Same old tea parties.
79
00:05:59,160 --> 00:06:01,994
- Same old concerts.
- Same old balls.
80
00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:04,470
(Both sigh)
81
00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:08,076
Henri, we regret to inform you,
we're bored with our appearances.
82
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:11,756
- Exceeding bored.
- This wig you gave me is absolutely common.
83
00:06:11,840 --> 00:06:14,719
Definitely below your usual standard, Henri.
84
00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:19,272
Please forgive me, but I'm so upset by the news
I've received from my beloved France.
85
00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:21,511
- Your beloved who?
- France, my country.
86
00:06:21,600 --> 00:06:23,876
Oh, I thought he meant a person. A chap, a girl.
87
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,191
News? What news?
88
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:29,876
- Why, the Revolution.
- Revolution? What does he mean, Darcy?
89
00:06:29,960 --> 00:06:33,078
Some new form of vice, I imagine.
You know what they're like.
90
00:06:33,160 --> 00:06:35,117
Oh, yes. Another bore.
91
00:06:35,200 --> 00:06:39,558
No. Haven't you heard, gentlemen?
All the French aristocracy are losing their heads.
92
00:06:39,640 --> 00:06:41,199
But that isn't news!
93
00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:44,159
- By the guillotine.
BOTH: Oh.
94
00:06:44,240 --> 00:06:45,799
Executed.
95
00:06:45,880 --> 00:06:47,837
Oh. For what reason?
96
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:50,799
For no reason,
except that they are lords and ladies.
97
00:06:50,880 --> 00:06:53,190
Ladies too? I say, that isn't cricket.
98
00:06:53,280 --> 00:06:54,873
Damnable waste, to boot.
99
00:06:54,960 --> 00:06:57,236
It's madness, absolute madness.
100
00:06:57,320 --> 00:07:01,075
And no-one is lifting a finger to help them.
No-one at all.
101
00:07:01,160 --> 00:07:03,117
Please excuse me, Sir Rodney.
102
00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:06,272
(Crying) I am so overcome.
103
00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:09,353
Stab me sideways.
Did you hear that, Darcy, my dear?
104
00:07:09,440 --> 00:07:11,397
They're chopping their heads off.
105
00:07:11,480 --> 00:07:13,517
With no-one lifting a finger to help them.
106
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,956
- Disgraceful.
- Damned.
107
00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:19,636
I say, Darcy, my dear.
Do you think that you and I might...
108
00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,280
- ..lift a finger?
- Or two.
109
00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:24,317
I say, that would be a good idea!
110
00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,039
Wouldn't it just?
111
00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:28,077
(Unaffected voice) Darcy...to Paris.
112
00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:33,554
And so started the rescue operationthat was to utterly bewitch. bewilder and bedevil
113
00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:37,554
Citizens Camembert and Bidet. An operationin which Sir Rodney and Lord Darcy.
114
00:07:37,640 --> 00:07:40,997
by means of a seriesof audacious ruses and artful disguises,
115
00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:43,640
snatched the victims from the very steps
116
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,076
of Madame La Guillotine.
117
00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:13,157
(Shouting and jeering)
118
00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,797
(Chuckles)
119
00:08:37,440 --> 00:08:39,477
(Coughing)
120
00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:56,317
(Coughing)
121
00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:01,080
He always leaves one of these behind,
eh, Camembert?
122
00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:02,913
Yes, Citizen Robespierre.
123
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,957
Well, what is it? What's it supposed to be?
124
00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:09,956
From inquiries I've made, I gather it's a sign
used in England to convey contempt.
125
00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:10,996
England?
126
00:09:11,080 --> 00:09:15,996
Yes. Many of them have it
on their coats of arms. Two digits, rampant.
127
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:19,630
Then what you're trying to say is that this...
What did you call him?
128
00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:23,031
The Black Fingernail, for want of a better name.
One nail is black.
129
00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:25,510
Yes, yes, yes!
Is he one of the British aristocracy?
130
00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:27,319
Oh, undoubtedly.
131
00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,959
I spit on them.
132
00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:30,554
So do I. (Spits)
133
00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:33,393
Oh, I beg your pardon.
134
00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:37,394
- He must be stopped, Camembert.
- Don't worry, Citizen. I'll get him next time.
135
00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:39,233
Well, you'd better.
136
00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:42,154
The Duc de Pommfrit
goes to the guillotine tomorrow,
137
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:45,199
as a prominent leader of the Royalists. (Spits)
138
00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:51,511
I said "Royalists", Camembert.
139
00:09:51,600 --> 00:09:53,796
Oh, yes, of course. (Spits)
140
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:56,190
That's better. Now, as I was saying,
141
00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:59,956
if the Duc de Pommfrit should escape,
it would be disastrous.
142
00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:04,910
Don't worry, Citizen. I'll have the guillotine
inspected and put extra soldiers on duty.
143
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:08,596
By this time tomorrow,
the Duc of Pommfrit will have had his chips.
144
00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:32,432
Whoa! Here we are, then, Citizens.
145
00:10:32,520 --> 00:10:37,037
This is it. Working models of the guillotine.
Only five francs each.
146
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:40,352
Complete with six aristos,
with fully detachable heads!
147
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:42,750
Ha-ha! Take one home to the kids tonight.
148
00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:45,639
Play with it yourself
and watch it fall off in your hands.
149
00:10:45,720 --> 00:10:47,279
Right. Here we are. Five francs.
150
00:10:47,360 --> 00:10:50,159
- Good old Darcy.
- That's right. Lovely.
151
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:53,470
Come on, Bidet. Come on. Let's get started.
152
00:10:53,560 --> 00:10:55,995
Certainly, Citizen, sir. Le Duc de Pommfrit.
153
00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:57,753
Le Duc de Pommfrit!
154
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:03,670
Le Duc de Pommfrit!Le Duc de Pommfrit!
155
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,513
That's him. Get ready.
156
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,399
Well, don't just stand there, man.
Go and get him.
157
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:09,630
Eh? Yes, all right.
158
00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:13,634
Clear the way! Clear the way there! Get out of it.
159
00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:15,712
Pommfrit.
160
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:17,632
(Laughs)
161
00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:20,076
Pommfrit, we're waiting for you.
162
00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:22,436
Oh, hello.
163
00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:24,637
I shan't be long. I'm on the last chapter.
164
00:11:24,720 --> 00:11:27,679
(Laughs) This is good, you know!
165
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,956
Put that book down.
166
00:11:30,040 --> 00:11:33,795
Oh, I couldn't possibly do that.
This is the latest Marquis de Sade.
167
00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:34,836
Oh.
168
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:37,480
- (Laughs)
- Come on.
169
00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:40,598
Take your filthy hands off me, peasant.
170
00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:44,310
Peasant, am I?
Let me tell you that my blood's as good as yours.
171
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:47,518
Nonsense. Everyone knows
your father was a basket-maker.
172
00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:49,751
Ah-ha. That's where you're wrong, see?
173
00:11:49,840 --> 00:11:52,799
Nobody knows who my father was.
Not even my mother.
174
00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:54,633
(Laughter)
175
00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:58,918
You'll laugh on the other side of your face
when your head comes off.
176
00:11:59,000 --> 00:12:01,754
Thank you.
I'm quite capable of making my own way.
177
00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:08,918
(Chuckles condescendingly)
178
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:26,717
Your Grace, there's an urgent letter for you.
179
00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:28,792
Drop it in the basket. I'll read it later.
180
00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:29,996
(Laughter)
181
00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:34,117
Short back and sides. Not too much off the top.
182
00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:38,351
One has to admire his courage.
183
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:41,319
These aristos are all the same.
Anything for a giggle.
184
00:12:47,880 --> 00:12:50,076
Hold it. The Duc de Pommfrit?
185
00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:53,232
- Oh, hello.
- I'm sorry to bother you at a time like this.
186
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:55,277
Quite all right. It happens to all of us.
187
00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:56,999
- A pinch?
- Thank you, no.
188
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,037
I represent Lloyd's of London.
189
00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:02,352
- Could I interest you in life insurance?
- No. not today.
190
00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:06,275
It's a very good policy. It covers accidental death
by drowning, shooting,
191
00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:08,317
stabbing, poisoning, hanging...
192
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:11,279
- Beheading?
- No. We can't take too many risks.
193
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:15,912
What's going on here? You, sir, how dare you
obstruct the course of justice in this way!
194
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:19,038
- All right. I'm only trying to make a living.
- A living?
195
00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:20,952
- Are you fully covered?
- I hope so.
196
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,874
Come on. Get off. Come on. Allez. Go.
197
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,953
Terribly sorry to keep you waiting, Your Grace.
198
00:13:27,040 --> 00:13:30,750
That's all very well, but it would
never have happened under a monarchy.
199
00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,560
There's no need
to make a political issue out of it.
200
00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:35,199
Carry on, Malabonce.
201
00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:44,115
- (Crowd gasps)
- Now what's the matter?
202
00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:46,431
I dunno. It worked all right this morning.
203
00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:49,638
Excuse me,
but isn't the rope caught up at the top there?
204
00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:52,076
No, it isn't, and mind your own business.
205
00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:56,200
- I was only trying to help.
- We're quite capable of managing, thank you.
206
00:13:56,280 --> 00:14:00,069
Well, I wish you'd hurry up. I'm getting
a shocking pain in the neck down here.
207
00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:03,232
I assure you, my dear Duke,
that once we get this working,
208
00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:05,312
you'll be the first to know about it.
209
00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:08,199
Excuse me.
I think I can see what the trouble is here.
210
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:11,352
- What do you know about it?
- Plenty. Take that blade up.
211
00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:15,150
I'm sorry to bother you, but could you step out?
212
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,914
Oh, really! Just as I was getting comfortable.
213
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,155
Aha.
214
00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:22,993
I thought so. Who made this thing?
215
00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:24,309
I did.
216
00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:26,357
I approved the design, of course.
217
00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:29,717
Well, you didn't do a very good job.
One of these runners has a kink.
218
00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:31,757
Yes. You have got a kinky runner.
219
00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:34,435
I ain't got a kinky runner.
220
00:14:34,520 --> 00:14:36,477
See for yourself.
221
00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:40,553
I don't see no kink.
222
00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:45,032
- Oh, it's there, all right. It'll never work.
- Of course it will. Won't it, Malabonce?
223
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:46,520
Of course. Course.
224
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:49,752
- Do you want a bet?
- Yes. 100 francs.
225
00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:51,991
- You're on.
- Right.
226
00:14:52,080 --> 00:14:55,596
- We'll show him, won't we, Malabonce?
- Yeah, yeah. We'll show him.
227
00:14:58,400 --> 00:15:00,073
Mon Dieu!
228
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:01,799
(Thud)
229
00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:03,075
(Gasps of shock)
230
00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:06,840
Dear, oh, dear. I owe you 100 francs.
231
00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:10,197
What have I done?
Is there a doctor in the house?
232
00:15:10,280 --> 00:15:12,078
(Shouting and screaming)
233
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:14,038
You have no right to get up... Guards!
234
00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:17,192
Guards! Protect my person. Get 'em off.
235
00:15:17,280 --> 00:15:19,351
I'm a faithful servantof the Republic!
236
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:21,397
You have no right.
237
00:15:21,480 --> 00:15:23,437
- Thank you.
- My pleasure.
238
00:15:23,520 --> 00:15:25,751
Get 'em off. Down! Down!
239
00:15:25,840 --> 00:15:27,832
Help! Help! Guards! Guards!
240
00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:29,673
Protect my person!
241
00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:31,717
Guards! Guards!
242
00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:34,837
You have no right!
243
00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:37,833
I'm Camembert. I'm the big cheese.
244
00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,070
Getoff.
245
00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:42,358
I'm a member of the Government.
You have no right.
246
00:15:42,440 --> 00:15:44,432
(Laughs)
247
00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:46,830
It's all the fault of that insurance salesman.
248
00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:49,799
Where is he? Where's he gone?
I'll have his head for this.
249
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:53,716
He's gone. So has the Duc de Pommfrit.
250
00:15:53,800 --> 00:15:55,712
What?! Aargh!
251
00:15:55,800 --> 00:16:00,079
- What is it, Citizen, sir?
- The Black Fingernail.
252
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:03,836
It seems that the English have struck again.
253
00:16:03,920 --> 00:16:09,314
Yes, Citizen Robespierre, but then, they say it's
the one thing the English are good at - striking!
254
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:11,710
- I'm not amused.
- Neither am I.
255
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:14,156
So, Citizen Head of Secret Police Camembert,
256
00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:17,233
the so-called Black Fingernail
has fooled you again.
257
00:16:17,320 --> 00:16:19,277
Oh, I wouldn't say that, Citizen.
258
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:21,079
- Oh, you wouldn't?
- No.
259
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:25,552
This is his calling card!
It was found on the guillotine this afternoon.
260
00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:29,077
Yes, that's true, but he didn't fool me.
Oh, no, not for one minute.
261
00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:33,916
He didn't? Perhaps I've got the story wrong.
He posed as an insurance salesman. Correct?
262
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:35,150
Yes.
263
00:16:35,240 --> 00:16:37,960
- He abducted the Duc de Pommfrit?
- Yes.
264
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:40,839
- And tricked you into executing Malabonce?
- Yes.
265
00:16:40,920 --> 00:16:42,877
And he didn't fool you for one minute?
266
00:16:42,960 --> 00:16:46,078
I knew who he was.
I wanted to see how far he would go.
267
00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:48,959
Mon bloomin' Dieu!
268
00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:51,635
He couldn't have gone very much further,
could he?
269
00:16:51,720 --> 00:16:53,996
I don't know. We've still got the guillotine.
270
00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,190
Now, listen, Camembert.
271
00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:03,194
I want this Fingernail caught.
Do you understand me?
272
00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:07,320
Yes, Citizen, but the trouble is,
I don't know what he looks like. Nobody does.
273
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:10,552
Then find out,
or nobody will know what you look like.
274
00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:13,758
Oh, everyone always recognises me.
275
00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:15,320
Without a head?
276
00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:18,316
Now, get out of here, and find him.
277
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:20,960
Yes, Citizen. I'll do my best, but it won't be easy.
278
00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:24,590
The Fingernail is a master of disguise.
He could be anyone.
279
00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:26,558
(Shrieks) Get out!
280
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:29,319
Get out!
281
00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:33,155
Come, now, girl. Admit it.
You're a cursed aristo, aren't you?
282
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:36,836
Come, come. We secret police
have ways of making people talk.
283
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:40,550
- Shall we use the thumbscrews?
- Not till Citizen Camembert gets here.
284
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:42,677
If there's screwing to be done, he'll do it.
285
00:17:43,760 --> 00:17:46,992
- He's screwed up the Revolution already.
- Ah, Bidet.
286
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,680
All roads and other exits out of the city
are guarded?
287
00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:54,559
Oh, yes, definitely, sir. This woman here...
288
00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:57,200
- Bridges are securely held?
- I haven't asked her, sir.
289
00:17:57,280 --> 00:17:59,112
I said bridges, not britches.
290
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:00,554
Oh, yes. Yes, sir.
291
00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:04,316
Good. This accursed Fingernail
must be caught this time.
292
00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:06,357
If only we knew what he looked like.
293
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:10,150
Don't worry.
I've given orders to hold anyone disguised...
294
00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:13,358
- as anyone.- That'll be a lotof help, won'tit?!
295
00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:16,160
Who's this woman? What's she doing here?
296
00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:19,472
I was about to tell you, Citizen, sir.
She was out after curfew.
297
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:23,190
Well, nothing wrong
with a bit of after-curfew, eh, my dear?
298
00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:26,239
- (Simpers)
- But you shouldn't be out late, you know.
299
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:30,075
- (Simpers)
- You're a naughty girl, aren't you?
300
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:34,074
- (High-pitched) Yes.
- And I bet you've done it before, haven't you?
301
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:36,914
Oh, yes. (Chuckles)
302
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:42,518
Well, I don't think we need detain you
any longer. You can go home now.
303
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:44,557
Thank you. You're very kind.
304
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,871
- (Chuckles)
- Just a moment.
305
00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:56,630
You'd better let me have your address.
I'll be along later to erm...check up.
306
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:58,677
Thank you.
307
00:19:07,360 --> 00:19:09,716
Nice little...citizen thing, eh?
308
00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:13,350
- You're not letting her go, sir?
- Of course I'm letting her go, Bidet.
309
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:15,397
I think you're making a great mistake.
310
00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:19,360
You should get the chance
to make such a mistake, Citizen Bidet.
311
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:21,636
But she's probably an aristo.
312
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:24,235
Have you ever known a lady
who needed a shave?
313
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,391
- A shave, sir?
- Yes.
314
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:29,712
When she kissed me just now,
I distinctly felt her stubble.
315
00:19:29,800 --> 00:19:31,154
Really?
316
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:34,199
And not only that.
She positively reeked of tobacco.
317
00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:36,351
Well, perhaps you're right, Citizen, sir.
318
00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:40,593
Of course I'm right, Citizen Bidet. Ah-ha-ha.
319
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:44,515
Make a note of these things,
and we'll make a policeman of you yet.
320
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:49,356
Well, I must be off now. Business, you know.
Let me know immediately of any developments.
321
00:19:49,440 --> 00:19:52,558
- Yes, Citizen, sir. Where will you be?
- At this address... Aaargh!
322
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:53,994
Whatis it?
323
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:56,914
It was him. The Black Fingernail.
324
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,834
Really? Aaargh!
325
00:19:59,920 --> 00:20:01,912
(Laughs)
326
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:03,957
No wonder she reeked of tobacco!
327
00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:07,716
He...he...he kissed me!
328
00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:09,598
(Gasps)
329
00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:12,673
Don't worry, Citizen, sir.
It was a marvellous disguise.
330
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:14,717
It would have fooled me.
331
00:20:14,800 --> 00:20:16,837
He did fool you, didn't he?
332
00:20:16,920 --> 00:20:18,240
What?
333
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:20,710
You had him here,
and you let him go, didn't you?
334
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:23,554
- I did, Citizen, sir?
- Yes, you did, Citizen nit!
335
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:26,997
- Ooh!
- Oh, you great wheyface, you! You!
336
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:29,914
Oh! I've just remembered...
337
00:20:30,000 --> 00:20:33,471
what I was about to try and do with him.
338
00:20:33,560 --> 00:20:36,473
- He can't have got very far.
- No, and neither could I.
339
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:40,110
I mean out of the city.
If we're quick, perhaps we can catch her...him.
340
00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:44,353
Yes, that's right. Yes, he'll make for Calais,
if he can get past the roadblocks.
341
00:20:44,440 --> 00:20:45,999
Coachman!
342
00:20:46,080 --> 00:20:48,754
- Coachman!
- Did you call, Citizen?
343
00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:51,594
Yes. Prepare my coach.
We leave at once for Calais.
344
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:53,990
Right, Citizen.
345
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:02,471
BIDET: To Calais, as quick as you can!
346
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:05,632
Wait for me! You stupid great fool!
347
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:10,476
Pick your hat up. You're supposed to make way
for a superior citizen, you know.
348
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:12,517
Allez to Calais!
349
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:16,957
Halt! Who goes there?
350
00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:20,637
Citizen Camembert.
351
00:21:24,320 --> 00:21:27,757
Listen. Has anyone passed out within the hour?
352
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:30,435
Only the sergeant. He's sleeping it off now.
353
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:32,477
I'm looking for a woman.
354
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:36,236
Oh, nothing doing out here, chum.
You want to try Montmartre.
355
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:38,277
I don't mean that!
356
00:21:38,360 --> 00:21:41,637
Oh, how I loathe these peasants.
Give me the aristocracy any time.
357
00:21:41,720 --> 00:21:44,155
Has anyone passed through here this evening?
358
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:46,197
No, not as far as I know, Citizen.
359
00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:48,715
Well, you keep a sharp lookout. Mind my hat.
360
00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:52,510
Keep a lookout for an Englishman,
a woman and the Duc de Pommfrit,
361
00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:54,432
probably all disguised.
362
00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:56,751
- What as?
- Well, how should I know?
363
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:59,674
There'd be no point in the disguise
if I knew what it was.
364
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:01,717
Oh, open the barrier.
365
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:04,395
Coachman! Calais, with all speed.
366
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:07,120
With pleasure, Citizen.
367
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,477
- Aaargh!
- I'm sorry.
368
00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:36,710
Fool.
369
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,315
Wait here, Coachman.
The rest of you, follow me.
370
00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:45,477
Sorry, Citizens. You're too late.
I've already called temps.
371
00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:47,517
Curb your insolent tongue, wench.
372
00:22:47,600 --> 00:22:49,876
You're talking to Citizen Camembert,
373
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:52,555
head of the Secret Police
of the glorious Republic.
374
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:55,997
Vive l'�galit�! Vive fraternit�! Vive...
375
00:22:56,080 --> 00:23:00,074
Oh, shut up. I wish
you wouldn't keep viving all over the place.
376
00:23:00,160 --> 00:23:04,393
Now, listen to me, woman. Have you had
any men in here disguised as women?
377
00:23:04,480 --> 00:23:07,200
I should say not!
What sort of place do you think this is?
378
00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:11,513
We are looking for a man who's trying
to flee the country disguised as a woman.
379
00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:14,638
Well, there's nobody here except me,
and I'm just going off.
380
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:17,519
- She's gone off, if you ask me.
- She's gone off...
381
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:21,435
Wait! She could be him. She's got the right build.
382
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:23,477
Leave it to me, Citizen, sir.
383
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:26,557
All right, woman.
384
00:23:29,480 --> 00:23:32,075
- Give us a kiss.
- Oh! Aargh!
385
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:34,117
Stop messing about.
386
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:39,432
- Well?
- No beard.
387
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:42,479
Come along, then.
We'll try the harbour. Come along.
388
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:46,400
And let that be a lesson to you, woman.
389
00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:47,834
Oi, blackhead!
390
00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:56,591
Look! The horse has gone.
391
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:00,997
(Raspberry)
392
00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:04,197
The Black Fingernail!
393
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:07,193
I don't believe it. The horse?
He couldn't have been.
394
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:09,272
Duc? Come on, Duc. Come on.
395
00:24:09,360 --> 00:24:11,591
- Search everywhere.
- Here they come.
396
00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:14,912
- They can't be far away.
- We'll never get to the boat now.
397
00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:17,879
Don't worry about it.
Just give me your hat and coat.
398
00:24:19,360 --> 00:24:21,317
Quick.
399
00:24:23,640 --> 00:24:26,439
(Groggily) Hello!
400
00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:29,911
A thousand francs
for the first man who takes the Fingernail alive.
401
00:24:30,000 --> 00:24:32,879
A thousand francs? Ho-ho!
402
00:24:32,960 --> 00:24:35,156
I don't know where he's getting it from.
403
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:37,630
I'll keep them busy. Meet you at the boat.
404
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:43,000
Yoo-hoo!
405
00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:45,354
- It's me.
- 'Tis he.
406
00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:48,440
- After he!
- After who?
407
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:49,840
- After him.
- After you.
408
00:24:53,440 --> 00:24:55,033
Yoo-hoo!
409
00:24:56,480 --> 00:24:57,960
Can't catch me.
410
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:04,839
CAMEMBERT:
Bolt the doors. He's in here somewhere.
411
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:06,877
(Bolts sliding)
412
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:17,994
(Gasps)
413
00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:20,879
Zounds! 'Tis a woman. And what a cracker.
414
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:23,680
What means this intrusion, Monsieur?
415
00:25:23,760 --> 00:25:26,753
How handsome he is!
And every inch a gentleman.
416
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:28,194
I mean you no harm.
417
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:30,033
Opportunity would be a fine thing.
418
00:25:30,120 --> 00:25:32,316
Please...leave at once.
419
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:35,552
If he does,
I shall surely swoon with disappointment.
420
00:25:35,640 --> 00:25:37,757
Alas, I cannot.
421
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:40,275
Just look how that pretty bosom heaves.
422
00:25:40,360 --> 00:25:42,317
Pray, why not?
423
00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:44,960
Oh, why does my pretty bosom heave so?
424
00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:47,635
The Secret Police are after me.
425
00:25:47,720 --> 00:25:50,633
What's this pounding in my ear holes?
Could I be in love?
426
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:53,713
The Secret Police? But why?
427
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:57,077
Oh, my fluttering heart. Can it be I love him?
428
00:25:57,160 --> 00:26:00,836
They seek me because...
I am the Black Fingernail.
429
00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:02,877
The Black Fingernail?
430
00:26:02,960 --> 00:26:04,713
My hero in person!
431
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:07,520
I must love her,
or I wouldn't have told her that.
432
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:11,674
I, and all France, are in your debt, Monsieur.
433
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:13,717
I salute you.
434
00:26:15,280 --> 00:26:17,237
Now, that's what I call a salute.
435
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:19,312
I would do anything for you.
436
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:22,552
Your wish is my command,
and your desire is my desire.
437
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:24,597
- Really?
- Mm-hm.
438
00:26:24,680 --> 00:26:27,832
Methinks, if I play my cards right,
I might be onto a good thing.
439
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:29,274
(Knock on door)
440
00:26:29,360 --> 00:26:33,320
Ouvrez, in the name of Citizen Camembert
and the glorious new French Republic!
441
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:35,790
Vive l'�galit�, vive fraternit�, vive...
442
00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:39,317
Oh, shut up.
Open up! We wish to search the room.
443
00:26:39,400 --> 00:26:40,880
One moment.
444
00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:43,031
You must flee.
445
00:26:43,120 --> 00:26:45,351
(Whistles)
446
00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:48,278
(Whinnies)
447
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:51,519
Open up in there!
448
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,432
Go quickly, my dearest love.
449
00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:55,671
I will return. Here.
450
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:58,355
Take this, as a token of my undying love.
451
00:26:58,440 --> 00:27:02,957
- What a beautiful locket!
- My mother's. It contains her last set of teeth.
452
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:06,158
Thank you.
I will think of you every time I clean them.
453
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:07,993
Ouvrez! Ouvrez!
454
00:27:08,080 --> 00:27:09,639
Oh, go, man, go.
455
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:11,677
Till we meet again.
456
00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:13,831
(Knocking)
457
00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:16,474
Ooh! Go on! Giddap!
458
00:27:16,560 --> 00:27:18,995
Go on! Go on!
459
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:21,037
BIDET: Oh. I'll have another go.
460
00:27:21,120 --> 00:27:24,033
CAMEMBERT: Show your authority. man.
BIDET: I can't.
461
00:27:24,120 --> 00:27:26,032
- Show your authority!- My trousers...
462
00:27:26,120 --> 00:27:28,351
Bidet. I warn you...
463
00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:31,991
Ouvrez! Ouvrez!
464
00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:37,273
Stand aside, sir. I'll open it this time.
465
00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:52,115
There he is. Seize him.
466
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:55,238
So, the accursed Fingernail
is in our hands at last.
467
00:27:55,320 --> 00:27:57,277
It would seem so, Monsieur.
468
00:27:57,360 --> 00:28:01,070
Oh, no, all your disguises and funny voices
won't help you now.
469
00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:04,915
Take him below, and get fresh horses.
We leave for Paris immediately.
470
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:08,357
And Bid... Bidet? Where is he?
471
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:22,310
And this, you claim, is the Black Fingernail?
472
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:23,993
Yes, Citizen Robespierre.
473
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:26,549
Er...but this is a woman.
474
00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:28,916
Oh, yes!
475
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,914
He may look like a woman,
but the Fingernail is a master of deception.
476
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:36,471
Just because he rode all the way from Calais
side-saddle...
477
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:40,110
All right, Citizen Camembert.
If you insist this is a man, prove it.
478
00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:42,351
- Me? But how?
- How? How, he asks.
479
00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:44,397
Call yourself a Frenchman?
480
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:48,759
- (Clears throat) If I might make a suggestion.
- Well, what is it?
481
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:52,197
I have an infallible method
for finding out the true sex, sir.
482
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:55,193
- Yes?
- Yes, sir. Sooner or later, sir,
483
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:58,273
he or she
will want to go and powder his or her nose.
484
00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:03,310
Right, sir. When that time comes,
we merely put him or her in a place
485
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:05,437
that has two cloakrooms.
486
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:07,000
Ladies and gents.
487
00:29:07,080 --> 00:29:10,152
Then we secretly observe
which one he or she goes into.
488
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:13,278
Citizen Bidet, I really must commend you.
489
00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:14,840
Any time, Citizen.
490
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:19,190
If I chopped off your head,
491
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:22,000
you'd still have as much brains
as you have now.
492
00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:23,833
Thank you, sir.
493
00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:26,674
I'll show you what sex she is.
494
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:33,280
There. Have either of you ever seen
a man looking like that?
495
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:36,080
Well, it's marvellous
what you can do with padding.
496
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:38,117
If I could just have a bit of a prod...
497
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:41,830
No, you cannot have a bit of a prod.
Imbecile! Admit it.
498
00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:44,355
This Fingernail
has made a monkey out of you again.
499
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:47,991
All right, girl. Tell me. Where is he?
500
00:29:48,080 --> 00:29:50,675
Out of your reach. Safe back in England.
501
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:53,480
It should be quite obvious to you now,
Camembert.
502
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:56,632
She and this Fingernail
have been in collusion together.
503
00:29:56,720 --> 00:30:01,431
Oh, no, Citizen.
I don't think they had time for anything like that.
504
00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:05,309
Take her away! And make her talk.
505
00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,357
And get me this Fingernail.
506
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:10,717
Yes, Citizen, but it won't be easy,
if he's gone back to England.
507
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:16,432
Then go to England. Find him.
Unfrock this master of deception.
508
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:19,877
- But what if I fail?
- Then don't bother to get your hair cut!
509
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:25,756
Go to England? What for?
510
00:30:25,840 --> 00:30:28,799
I told you. To find this accursed Black Fingernail.
511
00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:32,510
- Well, what's going to happen to me?
- What do you mean, happen to you?
512
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:34,990
Well, you're my protector. Who'll protect me?
513
00:30:35,080 --> 00:30:39,677
I can't think about things like that now.
I'm in danger of watching my own head roll.
514
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,717
It wouldn't roll far. It's too square.
515
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:45,680
I wish you wouldn't do that.
When you undress, it's like emptying a dustbin.
516
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:48,320
Well, why don't you buy me a wastebasket,
then?
517
00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:51,996
That's all I've ever really wanted out of life-
the simple things.
518
00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:55,118
I'd like to marry a nice man with a fortune...
519
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:57,715
and a ch�teau...and a title.
520
00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:00,554
Then why don't you go and marry someone
with a title?
521
00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:03,360
How can I?
You keep slicing their bloomin' heads off.
522
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:05,397
(Knock on door)
- Who's that?
523
00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:10,637
Oh, it's you.
524
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:17,560
Sorry to disturb you, Citizen, sir.
I mean, you did say, if it was anything im...
525
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:19,597
..portant...
526
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:21,433
Evening, Citizen miss.
527
00:31:27,440 --> 00:31:30,478
- Well?
- Very nice. Very nice indeed.
528
00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:32,916
Well, don't just stand there, man. Get it out.
529
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:36,756
- Get it out.
- Get what out?
530
00:31:36,840 --> 00:31:39,196
Whatever it was that was so important.
531
00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:41,590
It's about the girl. It's like you said, sir.
532
00:31:41,680 --> 00:31:44,593
I spent half the night
working to get information out of her.
533
00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:46,876
- And what did you find out?
- Nothing.
534
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:48,633
Nothing? Nothing at all?
535
00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:49,995
No. She kept mum.
536
00:31:50,080 --> 00:31:53,152
Never mind her financial arrangements
with her mother.
537
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:55,197
What about the Fingernail?
538
00:31:55,280 --> 00:31:58,956
Oh, well, there was this silver locket.
It appears he gave it to her.
539
00:31:59,040 --> 00:32:01,396
- With a lock of his hair?
- No, a set of his teeth.
540
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:03,472
A set of... A set of his teeth?
541
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:07,600
Fancy keeping your teeth in a silver locket!
I ask you!
542
00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:12,197
Isn't that typical of these damned aristocrats?
A glass of water isn't good enough.
543
00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:14,351
Mind you, sir, it'll help us to find him.
544
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:16,397
All we've got to do is to look for a man...
545
00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:18,233
who talks like that.
546
00:32:18,320 --> 00:32:21,040
A man who talks like that? That's no good.
547
00:32:21,120 --> 00:32:24,079
You know these plutocrats.
He's probably got a second set.
548
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:35,879
- What are you gawping at?
- Er...I come from a poor family, miss.
549
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:37,917
We couldn't afford luxuries like you.
550
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,037
Just a crustof bread and...
551
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:42,715
an occasional bit of crackling.
552
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:45,269
Cammie, I'd be very much obliged
553
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:49,240
if you'd ask this underling
to take his hot, sticky eyes off me.
554
00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:54,349
Underling? There'll be no more of that talk.
In our glorious Republic, all are equal.
555
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:57,877
Equality, fraternity...and liberty.
556
00:32:57,960 --> 00:33:02,079
I don't care about the equalities and fraternities,
but I am not having the liberties.
557
00:33:02,160 --> 00:33:06,518
- Quiet, you two. I've got it. I've got it!
- Well, you didn't get it off me.
558
00:33:06,600 --> 00:33:10,276
This girl,
she is the bait with which we set the trap.
559
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:12,238
The Fingernail must be in love with her.
560
00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:14,471
- But how do you know?
- My dear Bidet,
561
00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:19,077
gentlemen don't go giving lockets with their teeth
in them to every casual acquaintance.
562
00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:21,038
Oh, the English are a queer lot.
563
00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:24,557
Be that as it may, once we let him know
we have this girl a prisoner,
564
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:28,873
he will hasten back to France to rescue her,
and then...he's in your trap.
565
00:33:28,960 --> 00:33:30,633
Then what?
566
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:32,757
- Shut your trap.
- I only asked.
567
00:33:32,840 --> 00:33:35,400
But how can we let him know
the girl's a prisoner,
568
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:37,437
if we don't know who he is?
569
00:33:37,520 --> 00:33:40,319
We'll find out.
We leave for England immediately.
570
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:43,313
Now, there's a packet
leaving at dawn from Calais.
571
00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:45,437
Oh, no, Citizen. It's too dangerous.
572
00:33:45,520 --> 00:33:47,876
It won't be the first time I've caught a packet.
573
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:51,431
I mean, to go to England.
You know what they think of you over there.
574
00:33:51,520 --> 00:33:54,115
Yes, he's right.
Only aristos are welcome there now.
575
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:57,398
Then we shall be aristos.
Hurry up, Bidet. Order my coach.
576
00:33:57,480 --> 00:33:59,676
- Yes, sir.
- And don't forget my bag.
577
00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:03,037
Not that one, you fool. I mean my travelling bag.
578
00:34:03,120 --> 00:34:06,875
Oh, I don't know, though.
We'll need something to do on the journey.
579
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:10,917
Oh, excuse me.
580
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:19,117
? Slow music
581
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:46,991
Ah, Sir Rodney! I must congratulate you.
582
00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:49,470
A perfectly splendid charity ball.
583
00:34:49,560 --> 00:34:53,952
- Thank you, Lady Binder.
- Now, do tell me. What is it all in aid of?
584
00:34:54,040 --> 00:34:55,599
SFA.
585
00:34:55,680 --> 00:34:58,479
Oh, come. It must be in aid of something.
586
00:34:58,560 --> 00:35:01,519
SFA. Stranded French Aristocrats.
587
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,798
Oh, of course. A very worthy cause.
588
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:07,236
And you've done them proud tonight.
589
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:13,157
But then, you've always had magnificent balls,
and I wouldn't miss one of them.
590
00:35:13,240 --> 00:35:15,197
Thank you, Lady Binder.
591
00:35:22,760 --> 00:35:25,559
Darcy, I've been waiting for you.
What news from France?
592
00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:29,839
Nothing yet. We have agents making inquiries,
but the girl seems to have disappeared.
593
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:34,437
I've got to find her, Darcy. Did you tell them
they'd recognise her by my mother's teeth?
594
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,957
Yes. It's very difficult
looking in every girl's mouth, you know.
595
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:41,477
Not in the mouth, you fool!
In the locket round her neck.
596
00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:45,759
Isn't it marvellous? No wonder they haven't
traced her. I'll have to go over myself.
597
00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:48,719
I wouldn't, if I were you.
There's a price on your head.
598
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:53,511
Oh, and a couple calling themselves
the Duke and Duchess de la Plume de Ma Tante
599
00:35:53,600 --> 00:35:55,831
arrived in London from France yesterday.
600
00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:57,673
- Escaped?
- Mm-hm.
601
00:35:57,760 --> 00:35:59,956
- Without our help?
- Exactly.
602
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:04,398
There is something fishy going on,
so I took the liberty of inviting them here tonight.
603
00:36:04,480 --> 00:36:08,679
(Lisps) Good lad.
It'll give us a chance to...quiz them, eh?
604
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:17,320
Oh, thank you.
605
00:36:17,400 --> 00:36:19,357
Come along. What's the matter with you?
606
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:22,990
It's these humpback bridges.
I shan't be able to sit down for a week.
607
00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:26,152
Oh, don't be so vulgar.
You're supposed to be an aristocrat.
608
00:36:26,240 --> 00:36:28,197
Don't they have bottoms, then?
609
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:31,318
Of course,
but down here they're called country seats.
610
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:34,472
- And what do they call them in London?
- The London derri�re.
611
00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:37,598
Well, I won't be putting my derri�re
on a country seat.
612
00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:39,637
Come on.
613
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:58,519
Welcome to Ffing House, my dears.
I'm Sir Rodney Ffing. Two Fs.
614
00:36:58,600 --> 00:37:00,637
Ah, Sir Rodney.
615
00:37:00,720 --> 00:37:04,396
I am Count Henri de la Plume de Ma Tante.
One P.
616
00:37:04,480 --> 00:37:07,279
Delighted, my dear.
Methinks we have met before.
617
00:37:07,360 --> 00:37:11,354
Oh, methinks not.
Er...this is my sister, the Countess D�sir�e.
618
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,911
- Charmed to make your acquaintance.
- (Posh voice) Likewise, I'm sure.
619
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:19,199
Grace and beauty. You're a picture,
Mademoiselle...if a trifle overexposed.
620
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:23,752
You'll forgive this intrusion, Sir Rodney,
but after we heard about your ball...
621
00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:27,231
- Think not of it. My house is yours.
- You're very kind.
622
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:30,836
And now you must make up for lost time.
You've got a little behind.
623
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:33,230
Oh, fancy you noticing! (Laughs)
624
00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:39,390
- So, you've just escaped from France?
- Yes, by fishing boat.
625
00:37:39,480 --> 00:37:41,995
Oh, yes.
I thought that perfume wasn't from Paris.
626
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:46,438
We're anxious to make the acquaintance
of the Black Fingernail.
627
00:37:46,520 --> 00:37:49,399
- The what?
- The Black Fingernail,
628
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:54,430
that gallant gentleman who's been helping
so many of my dear compatriots to escape.
629
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:57,080
- Oh, yes, that big show-off.
- You know him, then?
630
00:37:57,160 --> 00:38:01,632
Heavens, no!
I have no stomach for the manly, virile type.
631
00:38:01,720 --> 00:38:04,315
Now, excuse me.
My card is marked for this dance.
632
00:38:04,400 --> 00:38:07,040
Perhaps the Countess will honour me later.
633
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:10,875
Delighted...if someone will mark my card.
(Laughs)
634
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:12,917
I will, Countess. Don't worry.
635
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:17,792
Do you think that's the Black Fingernail?
636
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:19,872
What, that Ffing? Don't be silly.
637
00:38:19,960 --> 00:38:22,316
Well, he seems very nice, and he's got a title.
638
00:38:22,400 --> 00:38:25,359
Yes, I'm sure,
and it's not one you use in polite society.
639
00:38:25,440 --> 00:38:27,397
Well...what do we do now, sir?
640
00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:31,997
Circulate. Try and pick up anything
that might lead us to the Black Fingernail.
641
00:38:32,080 --> 00:38:36,313
- Circulate? Right, sir.
- But remember, you must be circumspect.
642
00:38:36,400 --> 00:38:38,357
Oh, I was, sir, when I was a baby.
643
00:38:41,680 --> 00:38:43,637
? Lively music
644
00:38:59,920 --> 00:39:01,912
Excuse me, my dear. May I cut in?
645
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:05,755
- Of course, Rodney, darling.
- Thank you, my dear.
646
00:39:08,440 --> 00:39:11,035
Your friend, the Duc de la Plume de My Aunt.
647
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:12,873
What about him?
648
00:39:12,960 --> 00:39:17,079
- He's the living image of Camembert.
- What, the leader of the Secret Police?
649
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:20,437
- The big cheese himself.
- Well, what's he doing over here?
650
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:22,477
Shh. Act naturally.
651
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:38,157
(Hiccups)
652
00:39:38,240 --> 00:39:39,993
Oh, hark at me.
653
00:39:40,080 --> 00:39:42,800
You needn't request an audience.
You've got one.
654
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:45,759
I can't help it.
These bubbles get lodged in my chest.
655
00:39:45,840 --> 00:39:48,071
Hm, there's room for a few lodgers there.
656
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:51,119
- Psst.
- What?
657
00:39:51,200 --> 00:39:54,432
- Psst.
- Don't be ridiculous. I've only had a couple.
658
00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:58,150
(Whispers)
No, no, no. I think I've got a lead. Over there.
659
00:39:58,240 --> 00:40:00,038
(Laughing)
660
00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:02,680
The Duc de Pommfrit.
661
00:40:06,240 --> 00:40:08,914
Do go on with your story, Duke. It's so thrilling.
662
00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:12,277
Oh, yes.
There I was, face down on the guillotine,
663
00:40:12,360 --> 00:40:15,353
with a basket full of dirty great heads
staring up at me.
664
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:17,671
I wonder what happens to all the heads.
665
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:21,117
Oh, my dear, they have a special place for them:
the napper's yard.
666
00:40:21,200 --> 00:40:22,759
(Laughs)
667
00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:24,991
Do go on with your story, Duke.
668
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:29,279
Well, the drum roll stopped,
and everything went extremely hush.
669
00:40:29,360 --> 00:40:32,637
The executioner pulled the handle,
and the knife came down,
670
00:40:32,720 --> 00:40:34,677
and bounced off the back of my neck.
671
00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:37,514
- Bounced off the back of your neck?
- Yes! I had 'em fooled.
672
00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:39,557
I was wearing a hard collar.
673
00:40:39,640 --> 00:40:43,031
(Laughs) Well.before they had time to recover themselves.
674
00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:46,909
I leapt to my feet,
I seized the sword, and I laid into them.
675
00:40:47,000 --> 00:40:48,753
Take that. Take that.
676
00:40:50,120 --> 00:40:52,077
Take this. Take that. (Laughs)
677
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:56,277
And I must say, they took it very well.
678
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,670
- How many did you kill?
- Oh, six, seven.
679
00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:02,037
Six or seven?
What a bloody sight it must have been.
680
00:41:02,120 --> 00:41:04,555
Oh, it could have been a bloody sight more.
681
00:41:04,640 --> 00:41:06,677
But whatof the Black Fingernail?
682
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:09,594
- Was it not he who saved you?
- Him? Oh, no, my dear.
683
00:41:09,680 --> 00:41:11,637
He was around, but I didn't need him.
684
00:41:11,720 --> 00:41:14,280
Did you hear that, sir? What a load of bull.
685
00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:19,389
All men talk nonsense in their cups, Bidet.
It's what we call "coq au vin".
686
00:41:19,480 --> 00:41:21,711
But I bet he knows who the Black Fingernail is.
687
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:27,239
I say. Would any of you young ladies
care to join me for a stroll in the garden?
688
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:29,880
I know a nice, quiet little nook.
689
00:41:35,240 --> 00:41:38,358
Not the nooky types, obviously. Oh, well.
690
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:41,274
- Follow him, D�sir�e. See what you can learn.
- Why me?
691
00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:46,116
Because you are a woman,
and women can do things to...disarm a man.
692
00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:48,157
By the looks of him, he isn't even armed.
693
00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:50,197
- Do as I say!
- Oh, all right.
694
00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:54,160
But I warn you, one hint of the old whatsit,
and I'm turning it in.
695
00:41:55,200 --> 00:41:58,716
- Follow her, Bidet. Watch what she does.
- Why? Don't you trust her?
696
00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:03,716
Not all are as loyal to me as you are,
my faithful Bidet.
697
00:42:05,240 --> 00:42:07,072
Thank you, sir.
698
00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:09,117
I wish I had someone to follow him.
699
00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:14,750
That's him there, the one
who looks like he's smelling something nasty.
700
00:42:14,840 --> 00:42:17,639
- What do you think?
- Difficult to tell with that wig on.
701
00:42:17,720 --> 00:42:21,270
Yes, if we could think
of some way of getting it off...
702
00:42:21,360 --> 00:42:23,317
like a nice, juicy sneeze.
703
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:37,358
- Ah, Sir Rodney.
- All alone? Where's your gorgeous sister?
704
00:42:37,440 --> 00:42:39,193
They just popped out.
705
00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:42,910
(Tuts) That sort of thing is bound to happen
with those low-cut gowns.
706
00:42:43,760 --> 00:42:45,274
You do take snuff?
707
00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:48,592
The taking of snuff
is a vice of the degenerate aristocracy...
708
00:42:48,680 --> 00:42:50,319
And I love it.
709
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:53,359
Well, you'll go mad about this one.
It's very special.
710
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:55,397
(Sniffs)
711
00:42:56,720 --> 00:42:58,712
Rather mild for my taste, I fancy.
712
00:43:03,480 --> 00:43:04,914
Aaa-choo!
713
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,879
My wig! Where's my wig? Oh!
714
00:43:21,240 --> 00:43:24,870
Excuse me, madam. That's my wig, I think.
715
00:43:25,920 --> 00:43:28,276
Yes, that's more like it...
716
00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:31,751
Oh... Well, perhaps not.
717
00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:39,953
(Water splashing)
718
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:11,514
Oh...excuse me, but I seem to 'ave dropped
my 'andkerchief somewhere.
719
00:44:11,600 --> 00:44:14,354
Oh, it was yours, was it? I did see it somewhere.
720
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:17,956
Oh, don't bother, really. I...I...
721
00:44:18,040 --> 00:44:20,680
- What is it?
- I feel a little wan.
722
00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:23,639
Oh, dear. Then perhaps you'd better sit down.
723
00:44:23,720 --> 00:44:25,951
How kind you are! (Chuckles)
724
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:28,475
Is there somewhere
we can be quiet and undisturbed?
725
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:32,270
Oh, rather.
There is a beautiful spot in the arbour.
726
00:44:32,360 --> 00:44:35,239
Oh, really?
I had no idea we were so near the sea.
727
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:37,277
(Laughs) Come!
728
00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:48,797
What a quaint little place.
729
00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:51,520
POMMFRIT: It is called a "love pavilion".
730
00:44:51,600 --> 00:44:53,876
Oh. really? I wonder why.
731
00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:58,830
Yes, so do I. This marble seat's enough
to cool anyone's ardour. However...
732
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:01,435
Why, sir, what are you doing?
733
00:45:01,520 --> 00:45:06,231
Mademoiselle, may I say you are the most
ravishingly beautiful woman I have ever seen?
734
00:45:06,320 --> 00:45:10,758
Am I really? Oh, no, sir, you mustn't. I do insist.
735
00:45:10,840 --> 00:45:13,036
'Ere, knock it off.
736
00:45:13,120 --> 00:45:16,158
- What's wrong?
- Well, there is something I want from you.
737
00:45:16,240 --> 00:45:20,359
Oh, well, that's all right, then.
As long as we're both on the same lines.
738
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:24,150
No, no, sir.
Besides, I insist we have a little talk first.
739
00:45:24,240 --> 00:45:26,550
Oh, very well, then. What about?
740
00:45:26,640 --> 00:45:30,520
D�SIR�E:
I believe you know who the Black Fingernail is.
741
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:33,320
Yes. Well, I enjoyed that little chat. Now, then...
742
00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:37,599
I haven't finished yet. Besides,
my brother, the Count, wishes to meet him.
743
00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:39,592
I'm afraid that is impossible.
744
00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:42,639
You see, I promised never to reveal his identity.
745
00:45:42,720 --> 00:45:44,677
D�SIR�E: Not even to please me?
746
00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:47,229
Not even to please you.
747
00:45:47,320 --> 00:45:50,154
Not even if I were to please you?
748
00:45:50,240 --> 00:45:52,994
Not even if you were to...
749
00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:55,231
Oh, that's different.
750
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:58,791
I say. How pleasing do you think you can get?
751
00:45:58,880 --> 00:46:00,837
As pleasing as...
752
00:46:03,480 --> 00:46:05,437
..that, for example.
753
00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:08,433
A few more examples like that,
and you can please yourself.
754
00:46:08,520 --> 00:46:11,911
- Come here, you little vixen!
- Oh, get off! Stop it!
755
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:15,232
I can't stop it.
My blood's on fire, my heart's on fire...
756
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:17,357
Yes, and your hands are groping. Get off!
757
00:46:17,440 --> 00:46:20,512
POMMFRIT:
Vive l'amour! Down with everything!
758
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:25,360
Darcy,
you must be more careful where you sneeze.
759
00:46:25,440 --> 00:46:27,397
You quite upset Monsieur Camembert.
760
00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:29,472
What's that? What did you call me?
761
00:46:29,560 --> 00:46:31,836
You called me Monsieur Camembert. Why?
762
00:46:31,920 --> 00:46:33,877
Oh, do forgive me. A slip of the tongue.
763
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:37,874
But you do look like a chappie of that name
we met in Paris. You remember, Darcy?
764
00:46:37,960 --> 00:46:40,395
Oh, yes, a weaselly-faced little runt
765
00:46:40,480 --> 00:46:43,120
who tried to sell us those funny postcards.
766
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:45,669
Of course, it couldn't be you, could it, Count?
767
00:46:45,760 --> 00:46:48,594
Do I look like a man who sells funny postcards?
768
00:46:48,680 --> 00:46:52,230
Not a bit. You look more like the chappie
on the funny postcards.
769
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:54,516
I hardly think that's possible.
770
00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:57,160
That's what I said when I saw the postcards.
771
00:46:57,240 --> 00:47:00,597
Forgive me, gentlemen.
I find this conversation rather boring.
772
00:47:00,680 --> 00:47:02,831
Well, then, let's change it, Count.
773
00:47:02,920 --> 00:47:06,914
Did you have any luck finding that chappie?
What did you call him? The Big Toenail?
774
00:47:08,080 --> 00:47:09,833
The Black Fingernail.
775
00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:12,719
Ah, yes, of course. Aren't I a silly Ffing?
776
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:18,834
Er...excuse me.
My secretary wishes to speak to me.
777
00:47:21,280 --> 00:47:24,159
- Well?
- She's with him, Pommfrit, in the garden.
778
00:47:24,240 --> 00:47:27,233
- Excellent. Is she getting it?
- Not half.
779
00:47:27,320 --> 00:47:29,277
- What do you mean?
- (Whispers)
780
00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:31,352
- Had what off?
- His gloves.
781
00:47:31,440 --> 00:47:33,636
Bad news, my dear Count?
782
00:47:33,720 --> 00:47:38,749
On the contrary. I fancy my quest
for the Black Fingernail will soon be at an end.
783
00:47:39,920 --> 00:47:41,877
(D�sir�e screams)
784
00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:46,833
(Pommfrit laughs)
785
00:47:47,560 --> 00:47:49,119
He... Oh.
786
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:52,358
Never again.
Next time you want information, get it yourself.
787
00:47:52,440 --> 00:47:54,397
(Lisps) Was it a distressing experience?
788
00:47:54,480 --> 00:47:58,360
Distressin'? Talk about wanderin' hands!
He could write a travel book.
789
00:47:58,440 --> 00:48:01,353
Well, never mind.
Did you get the information I wanted?
790
00:48:01,440 --> 00:48:04,751
Oh, yes,
he knows who the Black Fingernail is, all right.
791
00:48:04,840 --> 00:48:06,957
Oh, there you are!
792
00:48:07,040 --> 00:48:08,793
Oh, hello, Duke.
793
00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:13,477
Naughty little girl. Running off like that,
just when my resistance was weakening.
794
00:48:13,560 --> 00:48:16,314
Oh, this is my brother,
the one what I was talking to you about.
795
00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:18,312
- How do you do?
- Delighted.
796
00:48:18,400 --> 00:48:21,438
My sister says
you have some information for me.
797
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:25,400
Oh, you must be the one
who's looking for the Black Fingernail.
798
00:48:25,480 --> 00:48:28,120
- Yes, I am.
- There you are.
799
00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:36,680
Oh, why can't we go home?
I'm fed up with this country.
800
00:48:36,760 --> 00:48:38,991
They all want you to talk about their parents.
801
00:48:39,080 --> 00:48:40,639
What do you mean?
802
00:48:40,720 --> 00:48:44,316
I've had dozens of men say to me,
"What about a bit of how's-your-father?"
803
00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:48,951
Well, what else can you expect
from a bunch of beef-eaters?
804
00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:53,000
Why don't they eat frogs' legs and snails,
like normal people do?
805
00:48:53,080 --> 00:48:55,117
Oh, the English have always been backward.
806
00:48:55,200 --> 00:48:58,432
Do you know,
they're still taking people's heads off by hand!
807
00:48:58,520 --> 00:48:59,670
Ow!
808
00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:04,073
Doesn't surprise me. People who keep
false teeth in lockets are capable of anything.
809
00:49:04,160 --> 00:49:08,473
The locket! I almost forgot.
We may trap the Fingernail yet. Put this on.
810
00:49:08,560 --> 00:49:11,519
Oh, not that horrible thing.
It's got false teeth in it.
811
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,637
Oh, it's all right. They won't bite you.
812
00:49:13,720 --> 00:49:15,473
Oh, all right.
813
00:49:15,560 --> 00:49:20,271
When you go back in the ballroom, make sure
you dance with every man there, if you have to,
814
00:49:20,360 --> 00:49:24,070
and also make sure he gets a good look...at that.
815
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:25,913
They always do.
816
00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:28,640
- I mean the locket.
- Oh.
817
00:49:28,720 --> 00:49:31,633
Go on, then. And don't forget, keep flashing it.
818
00:49:31,720 --> 00:49:35,555
Watch her, Bidet, and report to me
if anyone recognises the locket.
819
00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:37,154
Oh, yes, sir.
820
00:49:37,240 --> 00:49:39,197
? Slow music
821
00:49:48,280 --> 00:49:50,875
- I see you're admiring my locket.
- What locket?!
822
00:49:50,960 --> 00:49:52,713
Ah-ha!
823
00:49:58,680 --> 00:50:00,637
Excuse me.
824
00:50:01,840 --> 00:50:04,196
- Pretty, isn't it?
- Magnificent.
825
00:50:04,280 --> 00:50:06,431
'Ere, have a good look. That better?
826
00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:09,274
Yes, thank you. It was rather in the way.
827
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:11,317
Oh. Excuse me.
828
00:50:21,520 --> 00:50:23,477
? Jaunty music
829
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:32,911
Erm...excuse me, but erm...that locket.
830
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:34,753
Yes? What about it?
831
00:50:34,840 --> 00:50:37,150
W-Would you mind taking it off?
832
00:50:37,240 --> 00:50:39,197
It keeps b-bashing me in the face.
833
00:51:11,560 --> 00:51:14,997
- Really, Sir Rodney!
- This chain round your neck...may I pull it?
834
00:51:15,080 --> 00:51:17,037
Please do.
835
00:51:19,520 --> 00:51:22,194
- Where did you get that?
- You recognise it?
836
00:51:22,280 --> 00:51:24,431
- Yes, it was mine. I gave it to...- Yes?
837
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:26,671
- I must talk to you alone.
- Where?
838
00:51:26,760 --> 00:51:28,717
In the arbour in five minutes.
839
00:51:51,080 --> 00:51:54,551
- Oh!
- You didn't tell anyone about our assignation?
840
00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:56,438
I didn't even tell 'em we was meeting.
841
00:51:56,520 --> 00:51:58,079
Clever girl.
842
00:52:01,960 --> 00:52:04,794
Oh, sir...you mustn't.
843
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:08,840
I must say it, though.
I must confess, his kiss kindles a flame in me.
844
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:11,435
I s-s-simply cannot help it.
845
00:52:11,520 --> 00:52:13,637
I'm absolutely enamoured of you.
846
00:52:13,720 --> 00:52:16,110
I've got to say it,
even if she does get on my wick.
847
00:52:16,200 --> 00:52:20,114
And I of you, from the first moment we met.
848
00:52:20,200 --> 00:52:22,476
Oh, how can I betray him to Cammie?
849
00:52:22,560 --> 00:52:25,871
This is a bit of luck.
I can find out where she got that locket.
850
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:27,519
My little poodle.
851
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:32,038
I never knew that Englishmen could love so.
Hold me close again, I pray you.
852
00:52:32,120 --> 00:52:34,271
I care not if you are the Black Fingernail,
853
00:52:34,360 --> 00:52:37,717
- and an enemy of France.
- How did you know that?
854
00:52:37,800 --> 00:52:40,474
You recognised the locket.
It was set there to trap you.
855
00:52:40,560 --> 00:52:42,791
- By Camembert?
- Then you know who he is?
856
00:52:42,880 --> 00:52:46,669
From the moment I saw him.
Now, where is the girl you got that locket from?
857
00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:49,958
- I will tell you, if...
- If what?
858
00:52:50,040 --> 00:52:52,032
..if you will make me thine.
859
00:52:52,120 --> 00:52:55,033
- Make you mine?
- Make me thine.
860
00:52:55,120 --> 00:52:57,316
I don't think I can go that far.
861
00:52:57,400 --> 00:53:01,076
Look, I want to be Lady Rodney Ffing.
862
00:53:01,160 --> 00:53:05,677
Yes, all right, providing you promise not to tell
Camembert that I am the Black Fingernail.
863
00:53:05,760 --> 00:53:07,717
- Gladly.- Right.
864
00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:09,757
Now, then, about that girl...
865
00:53:09,840 --> 00:53:14,551
Camembert...has her prisoner. The Bastille.
866
00:53:14,640 --> 00:53:16,871
I know what he is. Where is the girl?
867
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:20,237
I've just told you. She's in the Bastille.
868
00:53:20,320 --> 00:53:23,757
- The swine. I'll kill him.
- No, no, you must not do that.
869
00:53:23,840 --> 00:53:28,437
He has left orders that if he does not return
within the week, she will go to the guillotine.
870
00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:32,480
- Then I've got to get back to France...
- 'Ere! What about our bargain?
871
00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:34,836
- I hadn't forgotten it.
- Well, then, seal it.
872
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:37,276
- I haven't got any sealing wax.
- Well, I have.
873
00:53:37,360 --> 00:53:40,990
No, madam! Madam! Put me down.
874
00:53:41,080 --> 00:53:43,311
It worked! It worked! We've got him.
875
00:53:43,400 --> 00:53:46,916
- Who is it? Who?
- You'll never guess. Sir Rodney.
876
00:53:47,000 --> 00:53:49,071
What? That Ffing? Impossible.
877
00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:51,550
It's him, all right. He said the locket was his.
878
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:58,752
I can't believe it. That fiddlesome fop?
That doodling dandiprat? The Black Fingernail?
879
00:53:58,840 --> 00:54:00,797
Yes. Shall I do him now?
880
00:54:00,880 --> 00:54:04,237
No, no, this must be handled with caution.
We're not in France now.
881
00:54:04,320 --> 00:54:08,200
In this ridiculous country, you need a reason
for killing someone. Where is he?
882
00:54:08,280 --> 00:54:10,033
In the rose arbour with D�sir�e.
883
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:13,352
In the rose arbour? Doing what?
884
00:54:13,440 --> 00:54:15,875
Well, I bet they're not watering the plants.
885
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:19,237
He's played right into my hands.
886
00:54:19,320 --> 00:54:23,951
I'll walk in there, surprise them both at it,
play the outraged brother,
887
00:54:24,040 --> 00:54:26,350
and challenge him to a duel...thus.
888
00:54:28,560 --> 00:54:30,836
Aren't you taking a bit of a chance, sir?
889
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:35,312
You seem to forget, Bidet.
I am the finest pistol shot in France,
890
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:38,120
and it's obvious
he's no use with any sort of weapon.
891
00:54:38,200 --> 00:54:41,671
You wouldn't say that
if you'd seen him in the rose... (Clears throat)
892
00:54:41,760 --> 00:54:43,717
I'll go and fetch a duelling pistol.
893
00:54:43,800 --> 00:54:47,919
But just to be on the safe side,
make sure you only load one with ball.
894
00:54:48,000 --> 00:54:49,957
(Sir Rodney whimpers)
895
00:54:51,840 --> 00:54:53,797
- What's this I see?
- Cammie!
896
00:54:53,880 --> 00:54:57,556
Oh!
My own sister ravaged before my very eyes.
897
00:54:57,640 --> 00:55:01,350
- No, no, it's the other way round.
- You despicable cur, sir.
898
00:55:01,440 --> 00:55:03,671
I demand immediate satisfaction.
899
00:55:03,760 --> 00:55:05,399
This seems a failing in your family.
900
00:55:05,480 --> 00:55:09,156
Enough, sir. You have insulted the honour
of the de la Plumes.
901
00:55:09,240 --> 00:55:12,358
- To say nothing of Ma Tante.
- Ooh, that hurt.
902
00:55:12,440 --> 00:55:15,877
As the injured party,
I have the choice of swords or pistols.
903
00:55:15,960 --> 00:55:19,237
Well, we won't quarrel.
You have the swords, I'll have the pistols.
904
00:55:19,320 --> 00:55:23,758
Do not jest, sir! Believe me: I am deadly earnest.
905
00:55:23,840 --> 00:55:26,230
And I am living Rodney,
and mean to stay that way.
906
00:55:26,320 --> 00:55:28,835
You have no choice. This is an affair of honour.
907
00:55:28,920 --> 00:55:30,877
We meet at dawn.
908
00:55:30,960 --> 00:55:33,555
Couldn't we make it later?
I sleep until midday.
909
00:55:33,640 --> 00:55:36,155
At dawn, sir. One hour from now.
910
00:55:36,240 --> 00:55:37,833
Oh, very well. Where?
911
00:55:37,920 --> 00:55:40,196
You may choose the location.
912
00:55:40,280 --> 00:55:44,320
- What about the Garden of Fragrance?
- The Garden of Fragrance it is, sir.
913
00:55:44,400 --> 00:55:46,631
They say the scent's lovely in the morning.
914
00:55:46,720 --> 00:55:48,677
Till dawn, then.
915
00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:54,797
What hour is it?
916
00:55:55,920 --> 00:55:57,877
A minute before dawn, sir.
917
00:55:57,960 --> 00:55:59,917
Hello. Here they come.
918
00:56:00,000 --> 00:56:04,313
- I don't care for your choice of location.
- I know what I'm doing. Are the horses ready?
919
00:56:04,400 --> 00:56:07,393
- Waiting. Will you kill him?
- No. He'd have the girl's head.
920
00:56:07,480 --> 00:56:10,951
I've just got to delay him long enough
for us to get a good start.
921
00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:17,035
Morning. Well, here we are, then.
What happens now?
922
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:21,000
- What? Haven't you ever fought a duel before?
- Only with conkers.
923
00:56:21,080 --> 00:56:24,551
- It's going to be a piece of cake, sir.
- I've never had a fight with cake.
924
00:56:24,640 --> 00:56:26,279
Wait for me!
925
00:56:26,360 --> 00:56:30,036
- What's he doing here?
- The Duke has agreed to act as referee.
926
00:56:30,120 --> 00:56:32,874
Good morning, gentlemen.
Lovely day. Are we ready?
927
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:36,112
- Yes.
- Splendid. Now, I want a good clean fight.
928
00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:39,796
No fouling, plenty of action,
and no shooting below the belt. Right?
929
00:56:39,880 --> 00:56:41,200
- Right.
- Right.
930
00:56:41,280 --> 00:56:43,920
Now, then, arm yourselves, gentlemen, please.
931
00:56:48,320 --> 00:56:50,277
For me? Oh, thanks.
932
00:56:51,440 --> 00:56:54,274
- You're only supposed to have one.
- Yes, only one.
933
00:56:57,880 --> 00:56:59,951
Well, for heaven's sake, get on with it!
934
00:57:00,040 --> 00:57:02,760
Now, now. Temper, temper. I am the referee,
935
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:06,675
and we shall start when I am ready. Ready?
936
00:57:06,760 --> 00:57:08,433
Seconds...out.
937
00:57:11,160 --> 00:57:13,152
(Chuckles) Well done.
938
00:57:13,240 --> 00:57:17,871
Now, then, will you face me, gentlemen, please?
939
00:57:17,960 --> 00:57:20,555
Now, when I give the signal, you will turn,
940
00:57:20,640 --> 00:57:22,677
walk ten paces. and fire.
941
00:57:22,760 --> 00:57:25,275
Are we ready? Good show.
942
00:57:25,360 --> 00:57:27,317
(Blows whistle)
943
00:57:33,000 --> 00:57:36,038
- Aaargh!
- I say, you're a bit close, aren't you?
944
00:57:36,120 --> 00:57:38,840
You nincompoop!
You're supposed to go the other way.
945
00:57:38,920 --> 00:57:41,640
- Which other way?
- Over there. Go on.
946
00:57:41,720 --> 00:57:43,677
Did you see that? He pushed me.
947
00:57:43,760 --> 00:57:45,353
Come back here at once!
948
00:57:52,960 --> 00:57:56,795
I'm very cross with you.
Another incident, and I shall send you both off.
949
00:57:56,880 --> 00:57:58,360
Well, he started it.
950
00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:00,193
- No, I did not!
- Yes, you did.
951
00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:02,431
That's enough. Really!
952
00:58:02,520 --> 00:58:06,070
All this fuss over a silly little duel.
Now, take your positions again.
953
00:58:07,680 --> 00:58:09,990
We will start back-to-back this time.
954
00:58:11,480 --> 00:58:13,551
That is better. Now, are you ready?
955
00:58:17,240 --> 00:58:21,280
(Screams) No! No! Don't kill him!
956
00:58:21,360 --> 00:58:23,113
I love... No!
957
00:58:23,200 --> 00:58:25,157
Get out of the way, woman!
958
00:58:25,240 --> 00:58:28,631
Get off! Get off! Get her off.
959
00:58:28,720 --> 00:58:30,837
Get that fan off the pitch.
960
00:58:30,920 --> 00:58:34,231
- Oooh! Oooh!
- I have never seen anything like it.
961
00:58:34,320 --> 00:58:36,039
You're a disgrace!
962
00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:40,558
If I may say so, sir,
you're showing an extraordinary lack of control.
963
00:58:40,640 --> 00:58:43,792
- So are you, in those trousers!
- You mind your own business.
964
00:58:43,880 --> 00:58:46,714
Now, for the last time, gentlemen...
places, please.
965
00:58:46,800 --> 00:58:48,757
Yes... Oh, thank you.
966
00:58:50,360 --> 00:58:52,158
Are you ready?
967
00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:54,038
- Excuse me.
- Oh, what now?
968
00:58:54,120 --> 00:58:56,510
Could we make it 15 paces instead of ten?
969
00:58:56,600 --> 00:58:59,069
- What on earth for?
- Well, 15 is my lucky number.
970
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:03,120
Oh, all right! 15 paces.
For heaven's sake, let's get this thing over with.
971
00:59:14,480 --> 00:59:17,040
- (Laughs)
- Oh, no! (Chuckles)
972
00:59:17,120 --> 00:59:18,440
Come on.
973
00:59:22,000 --> 00:59:23,957
BIDET: Sir! Sir! Are you all right?
974
00:59:24,040 --> 00:59:27,636
- Was it the...?
- The cesspit, where he belongs.
975
00:59:27,720 --> 00:59:29,632
Oh!
976
00:59:29,720 --> 00:59:31,677
Ooh! He's right in it this time.
977
00:59:31,760 --> 00:59:35,834
- That's why you picked this place.
- Yeah, that's it. Get the horses. Come on.
978
00:59:35,920 --> 00:59:37,752
(Groans)
979
00:59:39,120 --> 00:59:40,474
Ready?
980
00:59:40,560 --> 00:59:42,040
Now!
981
00:59:42,120 --> 00:59:43,873
DARCY: Come on. Here we go.
982
00:59:47,040 --> 00:59:49,396
Oi, Rodney, what about our bargain?
983
00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:51,915
Looks like you've lost your new-found love!
984
00:59:55,240 --> 00:59:57,197
(Both moan)
985
00:59:59,160 --> 01:00:01,117
Are you all right, sir?
986
01:00:04,600 --> 01:00:06,557
The kiss of life!
987
01:00:11,400 --> 01:00:13,278
- What, no chopping today?
- Too early.
988
01:00:13,360 --> 01:00:16,034
The unions won't let them work before breakfast.
989
01:00:16,120 --> 01:00:19,796
Why didn't you get rid of old stinky Camembert
when you had the chance?
990
01:00:19,880 --> 01:00:24,796
You stupid Darcy. If Camembert
doesn't come back alive, the girl gets the chop.
991
01:00:24,880 --> 01:00:26,951
Now, where is this Bastille, Pommfrit?
992
01:00:27,040 --> 01:00:28,997
- I haven't got it.
- You've been there.
993
01:00:29,080 --> 01:00:31,117
Oh, there. Yes, of course. Follow me.
994
01:00:43,440 --> 01:00:47,673
- I shall want half your detachment, Captain.
- Right, half of you, fall out.
995
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:16,032
We're too late.
996
01:01:16,120 --> 01:01:17,440
(Door opens)
997
01:01:19,840 --> 01:01:23,800
- He hasn't got her, sir. Look!
- I can see that, you great nitwit!
998
01:01:23,880 --> 01:01:28,238
Citizen Nitwit, if you don't mind, sir.
In our new Republic, all are equal...
999
01:01:28,320 --> 01:01:31,518
Yes, yes, I know all that rubbish.
1000
01:01:31,600 --> 01:01:33,910
So, Mademoiselle, we meet again.
1001
01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:37,357
I'm not afraid of you.
Send me to the guillotine, if you will.
1002
01:01:37,440 --> 01:01:40,274
You will never learn the identity
of the Black Fingernail.
1003
01:01:40,360 --> 01:01:43,478
I don't need to, Mademoiselle.
I already know who he is.
1004
01:01:43,560 --> 01:01:46,394
- What?
- Yes, an English fop.
1005
01:01:46,480 --> 01:01:49,951
A dancing dandy. A mincing ninny.
1006
01:01:50,040 --> 01:01:52,111
His name is Sir Rodney Ffing.
1007
01:01:52,200 --> 01:01:53,554
With two Fs.
1008
01:01:53,640 --> 01:01:56,758
Sir Rodney Ffing! With two Fs.
1009
01:01:56,840 --> 01:01:58,877
Even his name is music to my ears.
1010
01:01:58,960 --> 01:02:01,634
And I happen to know
that he's in Paris even now,
1011
01:02:01,720 --> 01:02:04,474
and that he intends to try to rescue you.
1012
01:02:04,560 --> 01:02:07,598
And when he does try, I shall be waiting for him.
1013
01:02:07,680 --> 01:02:09,637
Oh, what a dastardly scheme!
1014
01:02:09,720 --> 01:02:12,519
Now, now,
none of your filthy, bourgeois language here.
1015
01:02:12,600 --> 01:02:16,116
I shall not let him come here.
I shall get warning to him somehow.
1016
01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:18,157
I thought you might try that,
1017
01:02:18,240 --> 01:02:22,712
so I've arranged to have you secretly conveyed
to another place of detention. Come.
1018
01:02:25,400 --> 01:02:27,676
I can't stand it. I'm going in.
1019
01:02:27,760 --> 01:02:31,356
You must be joking. There's too many of them.
We're not even armed.
1020
01:02:31,440 --> 01:02:34,035
So what?
Who knows what's happening to her in there?
1021
01:02:34,120 --> 01:02:36,112
Death, or even a fate worse than death.
1022
01:02:36,200 --> 01:02:40,638
Don't worry. I haven't tried death,
but I tried the other. It's not as bad as they say.
1023
01:02:40,720 --> 01:02:42,677
- Somebody's coming.
- Come on.
1024
01:02:44,920 --> 01:02:46,877
Oh!
1025
01:02:59,560 --> 01:03:01,517
You know where to take her?
1026
01:03:01,600 --> 01:03:04,069
- Yes, Citizen.- Get going.
1027
01:03:04,160 --> 01:03:07,073
And guard her well, if you value your head.
1028
01:03:08,840 --> 01:03:13,596
I want two men on duty near her old cell,
night and day, Captain.
1029
01:03:13,680 --> 01:03:15,637
Yes, Citizen.
1030
01:03:15,720 --> 01:03:18,315
And you, Bidet, will remain in her cell.
1031
01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:21,313
If anyone tries to get in, arrest them immediately,
1032
01:03:21,400 --> 01:03:24,074
no matter who or what they look like.
Understand?
1033
01:03:24,160 --> 01:03:26,072
Don't worry, Citizen, sir.
1034
01:03:26,160 --> 01:03:28,117
He won't fool me with his disguises.
1035
01:03:28,200 --> 01:03:32,080
Good. Let me know the moment
anything happens. I shall be in my office.
1036
01:03:38,040 --> 01:03:40,350
Nice of them to tell us they're setting a trap.
1037
01:03:40,440 --> 01:03:42,477
Yes, isn't it? We'll make good use of it.
1038
01:03:42,560 --> 01:03:43,710
How?
1039
01:03:43,800 --> 01:03:48,670
Well, the first thing we do is find out where
they've taken her. It's very simple. Come on.
1040
01:03:55,160 --> 01:03:57,117
(Grunting)
1041
01:04:03,880 --> 01:04:05,633
(Laughs)
1042
01:04:07,200 --> 01:04:09,157
You two, come with me.
1043
01:04:12,600 --> 01:04:14,557
(Grunting)
1044
01:04:29,480 --> 01:04:34,475
Count of Marseilles,
Princess of Lyons, Duc de Saville...
1045
01:04:34,560 --> 01:04:37,314
Guillotine, guillotine, guillotine.
1046
01:04:37,400 --> 01:04:39,153
(Knock on door)
- Come.
1047
01:04:39,240 --> 01:04:41,152
Citizen! Bidet's caught someone.
1048
01:04:41,240 --> 01:04:44,551
What?! At last! At last!
1049
01:04:46,640 --> 01:04:48,996
(Cackles)
1050
01:04:52,960 --> 01:04:54,917
This should be him. Come on.
1051
01:05:02,280 --> 01:05:04,033
- Hands up!
- What are you doing?
1052
01:05:04,120 --> 01:05:06,077
I'm arresting you, you fool.
1053
01:05:06,160 --> 01:05:08,914
Are you out of your senses?
It's me, Camembert.
1054
01:05:09,000 --> 01:05:10,992
Yes, of course, and I'm Madame Pompadour.
1055
01:05:11,080 --> 01:05:13,311
Don't take that tone with me, you upstart!
1056
01:05:13,400 --> 01:05:16,996
Watch it, watch it. Oh, you've made
a right mess of this, haven't you?
1057
01:05:17,080 --> 01:05:19,037
You don't even look like Camembert.
1058
01:05:19,120 --> 01:05:20,998
But I am him. I mean, he.
1059
01:05:21,080 --> 01:05:23,356
Yes, we'll see about that. Guards!
1060
01:05:23,440 --> 01:05:26,035
You fool...!
1061
01:05:26,120 --> 01:05:29,192
- Does this look like Camembert?
- No, not half ugly enough.
1062
01:05:29,280 --> 01:05:32,239
- Where are those beady little eyes?
- And the snotty nose?
1063
01:05:32,320 --> 01:05:35,154
- And the rabbit teeth?
- All right. Take him away!
1064
01:05:35,240 --> 01:05:38,039
- Where are you taking me?
- To Citizen Camembert.
1065
01:05:38,120 --> 01:05:40,077
But I am Citizen Camembert.
1066
01:05:40,160 --> 01:05:41,719
Get out! Go on.
1067
01:05:45,800 --> 01:05:48,634
- He's not here.
- Of course he's not here. I'm him!
1068
01:05:48,720 --> 01:05:50,871
Why don't we take him to Citizen Robespierre?
1069
01:05:50,960 --> 01:05:53,111
Yes, Robespierre. He'll tell you who I am.
1070
01:05:53,200 --> 01:05:54,554
Out! Out!
1071
01:05:54,640 --> 01:05:57,030
All right. In you go.
1072
01:05:57,120 --> 01:06:00,033
Citizen Robespierre,
will you tell these fools who I am?
1073
01:06:00,120 --> 01:06:01,873
Well, who are you?
1074
01:06:01,960 --> 01:06:07,035
I don't believe it. You know me.
Citizen Camembert. Little Cammie.
1075
01:06:07,120 --> 01:06:10,079
I know Citizen Camembert very well,
but who are you?
1076
01:06:10,160 --> 01:06:12,994
Oh, no! Oh!
1077
01:06:13,080 --> 01:06:15,390
I caught him trying to rescue the girl, sir.
1078
01:06:15,480 --> 01:06:16,800
Well done, Bidet.
1079
01:06:16,880 --> 01:06:19,759
Of course,
the idea for the trap was mine, Citizen.
1080
01:06:19,840 --> 01:06:22,719
Your idea?
Don't believe him, the two-faced little rat.
1081
01:06:22,800 --> 01:06:26,680
The girl isn't in the cell. I had her removed,
so the Fingernail couldn't get her.
1082
01:06:26,760 --> 01:06:29,355
- Oh? Where to?
- The Ch�teauneuf.
1083
01:06:29,440 --> 01:06:31,477
Ch�teauneuf, eh?
1084
01:06:31,560 --> 01:06:35,918
With a guard of 20 soldiers over her.
Would I know all that if I weren't Camembert?
1085
01:06:36,000 --> 01:06:38,276
I'll look into it. Bidet, guard him well.
1086
01:06:38,360 --> 01:06:40,317
- Yes, sir.
- You two, come with me.
1087
01:06:43,720 --> 01:06:46,792
So, trapping the Fingernail was your idea,
was it?
1088
01:06:46,880 --> 01:06:49,952
Yes, that's right.
Citizen Camembert's not a bad old stick,
1089
01:06:50,040 --> 01:06:51,997
but he hasn't got it up here like me.
1090
01:06:52,080 --> 01:06:53,912
You stupid great fool!
1091
01:06:54,000 --> 01:06:56,071
- (Groaning)
- What's that?
1092
01:06:56,160 --> 01:06:58,117
I don't know.
1093
01:07:03,880 --> 01:07:06,554
(Gasps) Citizen Robespierre!
1094
01:07:06,640 --> 01:07:08,438
It can't be. He just went out.
1095
01:07:08,520 --> 01:07:13,675
That wasn't him, you blithering idiot!
That was the Fingernail. He's done it again.
1096
01:07:13,760 --> 01:07:16,434
- Then you must be...
BOTH: Camembert, yes.
1097
01:07:16,520 --> 01:07:20,355
Now will you believe me, you blithering idiot?
1098
01:07:20,440 --> 01:07:24,116
Oh, no! The girl. I told him where she is.
1099
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:26,157
My coach, quick.
1100
01:07:29,120 --> 01:07:30,873
(Robespierre grunts)
1101
01:07:41,200 --> 01:07:44,830
There we are. The Ch�teauneuf.
Or, as you would call it, Number Nine.
1102
01:07:44,920 --> 01:07:46,877
Well named. It won't be easy to take.
1103
01:07:46,960 --> 01:07:50,078
Not against 20 soldiers.Are those doors the only way in?
1104
01:07:50,160 --> 01:07:51,992
- Oh, yes.
- They look pretty solid to me.
1105
01:07:52,080 --> 01:07:53,992
- We need a ram.
- I saw one in the field.
1106
01:07:54,080 --> 01:07:57,630
- That was a ewe.
- Wait. I've got a better idea. Gunpowder.
1107
01:08:27,760 --> 01:08:29,433
'Ere! What about me?
1108
01:08:33,720 --> 01:08:35,996
- Well, hurry.
- Nice manners, I must say.
1109
01:08:39,560 --> 01:08:42,473
Ouvrez! Ouvrez! And hurry up about it.
1110
01:08:42,560 --> 01:08:45,200
Ouvrez! Ouvrez!
1111
01:08:45,280 --> 01:08:47,237
Oh, it's you, Citizen.
1112
01:08:47,320 --> 01:08:49,630
- Is the girl all right?
- Yes, Citizen. Fine.
1113
01:08:49,720 --> 01:08:52,679
Thank goodness for that.
We're in time. What's all that?
1114
01:08:52,760 --> 01:08:54,319
(French accent) ? He loves me
1115
01:08:54,400 --> 01:08:55,834
SOLDIERS: ? Yeah, yeah, yeah
1116
01:08:55,920 --> 01:08:57,115
? He loves me
1117
01:08:57,200 --> 01:08:58,395
? Yeah, yeah, yeah
1118
01:08:58,480 --> 01:09:00,551
? He Io-o-ves me
1119
01:09:00,640 --> 01:09:02,074
? Yeah, yeah, yeah
1120
01:09:02,160 --> 01:09:05,073
- What's going on in here?
- ? Yeah. yeah yeah
1121
01:09:05,160 --> 01:09:06,560
? He loves me
1122
01:09:06,640 --> 01:09:07,869
? Yeah, yeah, yeah
1123
01:09:07,960 --> 01:09:10,714
? He Io-o-ves me
1124
01:09:10,800 --> 01:09:12,280
? Yeah. yeah. yeah
1125
01:09:12,360 --> 01:09:15,637
Stop it! Stop it at once.
Get off the furniture, you louts!
1126
01:09:15,720 --> 01:09:17,951
How dare you sit on old, priceless antiques!
1127
01:09:18,040 --> 01:09:21,670
How dare you spoil beautiful things
with your grubby seat marks!
1128
01:09:21,760 --> 01:09:24,355
It's a disgrace. What's she doing with that harp?
1129
01:09:24,440 --> 01:09:27,558
- Plucking it.
- Well, I didn't think she was knitting with it.
1130
01:09:27,640 --> 01:09:29,836
I didn't see any harm in a bit of freedom.
1131
01:09:29,920 --> 01:09:32,719
No harm,
when the Fingernail may arrive at any moment?
1132
01:09:32,800 --> 01:09:35,952
Take her to the top room of the High Tower.
1133
01:09:36,040 --> 01:09:39,317
Yes, Citizen. But there's a window there.
He might see her at it.
1134
01:09:39,400 --> 01:09:41,869
Fool! I want him to see her at it.
1135
01:09:41,960 --> 01:09:45,397
She is the bait
that will draw him into my final trap.
1136
01:09:45,480 --> 01:09:48,359
Yes, Citizen. Right, you two, bring the girl.
1137
01:09:48,440 --> 01:09:50,397
Follow me.
1138
01:09:57,800 --> 01:10:00,599
Oh, filthy great louts!
1139
01:10:00,680 --> 01:10:04,993
Oh, absolute vandalism. They don't
appreciate good stuff when they see it.
1140
01:10:05,080 --> 01:10:07,390
Why the fuss about a crummy bit of furniture?
1141
01:10:07,480 --> 01:10:10,951
Crummy? This was the home
of Prince Jacques de Tourville,
1142
01:10:11,040 --> 01:10:13,430
one of the greatest art collectors in France.
1143
01:10:13,520 --> 01:10:15,477
Every piece in it is priceless.
1144
01:10:15,560 --> 01:10:17,119
So what? It's not yours, is it?
1145
01:10:17,200 --> 01:10:22,559
Yes! It was presented to me as a reward
for all my services to the Revolution.
1146
01:10:22,640 --> 01:10:24,552
- Who by?
- Me, of course.
1147
01:10:24,640 --> 01:10:26,871
- Oh.
- But what about Prince Jacques?
1148
01:10:26,960 --> 01:10:28,917
Never mind Jacques. I'm all right.
1149
01:10:29,000 --> 01:10:32,152
- But where do I fit in?
- Wouldn't you like to be mistress of this?
1150
01:10:32,240 --> 01:10:35,392
No, I'm finished with that.
It's marriage for me or nothing.
1151
01:10:35,480 --> 01:10:39,997
"The Princess D�sir�e de Ch�teauneuf."
Yes, I like the sound of that.
1152
01:10:40,080 --> 01:10:42,037
Oh, we'll see. We'll see. Come.
1153
01:10:42,120 --> 01:10:45,875
I must show you the private apartments.
They're magnificent.
1154
01:10:45,960 --> 01:10:48,998
Do you know, even the china thing is Dresden.
Bidet...
1155
01:10:49,080 --> 01:10:52,630
- Yes, Citizen, sir?
- I shall want top security. This is my final trap.
1156
01:10:52,720 --> 01:10:54,473
And she is the bait.
1157
01:10:54,560 --> 01:10:57,234
And what a smashing bit of cheese, sir!
1158
01:10:57,320 --> 01:10:59,277
(Laughs)
1159
01:11:16,520 --> 01:11:19,354
Oooh! Oh! Oh!
1160
01:11:20,480 --> 01:11:22,790
Oh, isn't it lovely?
1161
01:11:22,880 --> 01:11:24,837
What's that mirror up there for?
1162
01:11:24,920 --> 01:11:27,799
Oh, as I was saying,
the Prince was a great collector.
1163
01:11:27,880 --> 01:11:31,157
Oh, yes. He had some beautiful pieces.
1164
01:11:31,240 --> 01:11:33,436
Just look at this wardrobe here.
1165
01:11:33,520 --> 01:11:35,318
(Gasps) Oh!
1166
01:11:35,400 --> 01:11:37,153
These were the Prince's?
1167
01:11:37,240 --> 01:11:39,675
- His wife's.
- Oh, I was going to say!
1168
01:11:39,760 --> 01:11:41,717
Oh, look at this beautiful one.
1169
01:11:41,800 --> 01:11:44,952
- Would you like me to get it out for you?
- Oh, yes, Cammie.
1170
01:11:46,160 --> 01:11:47,833
Ooh!
1171
01:11:47,920 --> 01:11:49,673
Isn't it lovely?
1172
01:11:49,760 --> 01:11:52,116
- Why don't you try it on?
- Can I?
1173
01:11:52,200 --> 01:11:55,318
- Of course.
- Oh, Cammie! Oh, this is fun!
1174
01:11:55,400 --> 01:11:57,631
Help me get my dress off.
1175
01:12:15,520 --> 01:12:18,672
- Why are these doors bolted?
- So the Fingernail can't get in.
1176
01:12:18,760 --> 01:12:21,355
Imbecile! We want him in.
It's a trap. Open them.
1177
01:12:21,440 --> 01:12:23,193
- But...
- Open the doors!
1178
01:12:23,280 --> 01:12:27,160
- I've had my orders, Citizen.
- Oh, well...never mind. I'll do it.
1179
01:12:41,240 --> 01:12:44,438
- Come along. The doors are open.
- I know, but they opened them.
1180
01:12:44,520 --> 01:12:49,515
What was that noise?
Bidet? Bidet? Where are you? Where...?
1181
01:12:58,480 --> 01:13:01,632
- It looks like a trap.
- Yes, it's the spider-and-fly trick.
1182
01:13:01,720 --> 01:13:03,677
We'll have to find another way in.
1183
01:13:03,760 --> 01:13:05,717
I've got to get into Jacqueline's room.
1184
01:13:08,400 --> 01:13:12,633
Isn't it marvellous? I can't trust him
to do a thing without making a mess of it.
1185
01:13:12,720 --> 01:13:16,760
Bidet? Bidet? Are you all right? Bidet?
1186
01:13:16,840 --> 01:13:18,399
Mother!
1187
01:13:19,680 --> 01:13:22,479
Sorry, Citizen, sir. I can't think straight.
1188
01:13:22,560 --> 01:13:24,517
My brain's not working properly.
1189
01:13:24,600 --> 01:13:26,592
Yes, he's all right. Perfectly normal.
1190
01:13:26,680 --> 01:13:28,672
The Fingernail will be here any minute.
1191
01:13:28,760 --> 01:13:31,912
Now, no shooting.
I don't want bullet holes in my furniture.
1192
01:13:32,000 --> 01:13:33,957
Back to your stations, out of sight.
1193
01:13:34,040 --> 01:13:35,793
Yes, Citizen.
1194
01:13:37,000 --> 01:13:38,957
(Bidet groans)
1195
01:13:43,000 --> 01:13:44,957
Are you sure this will get me up there?
1196
01:13:45,040 --> 01:13:46,997
We used it at the siege of Agincourt.
1197
01:13:48,480 --> 01:13:50,995
All right. Go on. Let her go.
1198
01:13:54,680 --> 01:13:56,080
Aaaargh!
1199
01:13:57,440 --> 01:13:58,669
(Glass smashing)
1200
01:14:02,360 --> 01:14:04,317
You!
1201
01:14:04,400 --> 01:14:07,154
- Now, don't scream.
- Why? What are you going to do to me?
1202
01:14:07,240 --> 01:14:09,436
- Nothing.
- Well, that settles it. Help!
1203
01:14:09,520 --> 01:14:12,080
I tell you, I distinctly heard a crash. Come on.
1204
01:14:13,880 --> 01:14:17,510
Now, you know where she is,
and I've got to get her. Will you help me?
1205
01:14:17,600 --> 01:14:20,035
Look, you made a bargain,
and you never kept it.
1206
01:14:20,120 --> 01:14:23,238
I promise you,
if you help me, you'll marry your title.
1207
01:14:23,320 --> 01:14:26,154
- Honour bright?
- See that wet? See it dry?
1208
01:14:26,240 --> 01:14:28,596
If I break my promise, you can spit in my eye.
1209
01:14:28,680 --> 01:14:31,115
Not now!
1210
01:14:31,200 --> 01:14:33,078
Well?
1211
01:14:33,160 --> 01:14:35,197
All right. It's a deal.
1212
01:14:37,840 --> 01:14:40,309
And what, pray, is the meaning of this intrusion?
1213
01:14:40,400 --> 01:14:41,959
What was that crash?
1214
01:14:42,040 --> 01:14:44,760
Oh, well,
I had a little accident opening the window.
1215
01:14:44,840 --> 01:14:47,514
A little accident?
That was worth thousands of francs.
1216
01:14:47,600 --> 01:14:49,557
It's a stained-glass window.
1217
01:14:49,640 --> 01:14:52,030
Well, if it was stained, it needed replacing.
1218
01:14:52,120 --> 01:14:54,715
It needed repla...
1219
01:14:54,800 --> 01:14:56,757
Someone's been in here.
1220
01:14:56,840 --> 01:14:57,910
Don't be silly.
1221
01:14:58,040 --> 01:14:59,713
I don't believe you. Search the rooms.
1222
01:14:59,800 --> 01:15:01,757
- Please yourself.
- I will.
1223
01:15:24,920 --> 01:15:26,752
- Citizen, sir.
- What is it?
1224
01:15:26,840 --> 01:15:28,559
Look. Earmuffs.
1225
01:15:28,640 --> 01:15:31,235
You idiot! They're kneepads.
1226
01:15:34,120 --> 01:15:36,157
- Oh, yes.
(Thud)
1227
01:15:41,440 --> 01:15:43,397
(Shrieking and moaning)
1228
01:15:48,400 --> 01:15:51,711
Citizen, sir, I've got him, the Black Fingernail!
He's trapped.
1229
01:15:51,800 --> 01:15:54,190
Citizen Camembert? Citizen...
1230
01:15:56,560 --> 01:15:58,517
..Camembert.
1231
01:15:58,600 --> 01:16:00,990
(Banging)
1232
01:16:06,360 --> 01:16:09,432
(Muffled) You stupid...
Where are you? Where are you?
1233
01:16:09,520 --> 01:16:13,116
You stupid idiot!
What do you think you're doing?
1234
01:16:21,720 --> 01:16:25,919
Hello. Citizen Camembert
wants me to speak to the girl.
1235
01:16:26,000 --> 01:16:27,957
Certainly, madam.
1236
01:16:34,600 --> 01:16:36,557
All right. You can come out now.
1237
01:16:40,160 --> 01:16:42,117
That was a hair-raising experience.
1238
01:16:42,200 --> 01:16:44,669
- You!
- Yes! It's me.
1239
01:16:46,120 --> 01:16:48,874
- You said you would come back.
- I said I would come back.
1240
01:16:48,960 --> 01:16:50,917
- And you are here.
- And I am here.
1241
01:16:51,000 --> 01:16:53,469
- Like you said you would.
- Like I said I would.
1242
01:16:53,560 --> 01:16:56,758
Oh, all right.
What are you trying to do? Make a play of it?
1243
01:16:56,840 --> 01:17:00,834
- I never thought you would come back like this.
- It was the only way.
1244
01:17:00,920 --> 01:17:03,719
- You took a big risk.
- Not half as big as the one I took.
1245
01:17:04,800 --> 01:17:07,235
- I love you.
- And I love you.
1246
01:17:07,320 --> 01:17:09,471
Oh, that's enough.
1247
01:17:11,000 --> 01:17:13,151
- Come on. Let's get out of here.
- But how?
1248
01:17:13,240 --> 01:17:17,120
I've got friends. Here. See?
They're waiting for my signal.
1249
01:17:19,800 --> 01:17:22,599
Right, my friend. To arms.
1250
01:17:26,720 --> 01:17:30,157
In case it slipped your mind,
you're supposed to get us out of here.
1251
01:17:30,240 --> 01:17:32,277
Eh? Oh, yes.
1252
01:17:32,360 --> 01:17:35,478
Right. You go first, and we'll follow.
In a couple of days.
1253
01:17:35,560 --> 01:17:38,314
Oh, no, you don't.
We all go together, or not at all.
1254
01:17:38,400 --> 01:17:42,713
All right, then, spoilsport.
Go on. Make a noise. Call for help.
1255
01:17:42,800 --> 01:17:43,711
(Squeals) Help!
1256
01:17:46,360 --> 01:17:49,034
(Cackles)
1257
01:17:53,920 --> 01:17:56,992
Stay here.
I'll send for you when it's over. (Laughs)
1258
01:17:58,120 --> 01:17:59,315
Yoo-hoo!
1259
01:17:59,400 --> 01:18:01,198
(Blows raspberry) It's me.
1260
01:18:01,280 --> 01:18:03,317
The Black Fingernail! After him.
1261
01:18:03,400 --> 01:18:05,357
(Shouting)
1262
01:18:06,840 --> 01:18:09,958
Bolt all the doors, Bidet.
We've got him in the trap.
1263
01:18:10,040 --> 01:18:11,679
Yes, sir.
1264
01:18:23,800 --> 01:18:25,917
DARCY: Come on, Pommfrit.
1265
01:18:26,000 --> 01:18:29,835
Ah-ha-ha! Come on.
Defend yourself, you poxy knave!
1266
01:18:29,920 --> 01:18:34,233
I'll have you arrested for this. You know
what you're doing? You're masquerading.
1267
01:18:34,320 --> 01:18:37,154
Help! Help! Help!
1268
01:18:37,240 --> 01:18:39,709
Pax! Fainites!
1269
01:18:54,480 --> 01:18:56,199
(Laughs)
1270
01:19:00,280 --> 01:19:01,680
Cor!
1271
01:19:02,680 --> 01:19:05,434
No, no! Don't shoot. Mind the furniture.
1272
01:19:07,160 --> 01:19:09,072
No, no. Use your swords.
1273
01:19:11,080 --> 01:19:12,309
Darcy!
1274
01:19:15,920 --> 01:19:16,990
Now.
1275
01:19:17,080 --> 01:19:19,640
Ha-ha-ha! Come on.
1276
01:19:52,680 --> 01:19:54,911
Aaaargh!
1277
01:19:55,000 --> 01:19:57,720
(Laughs) Tremendous fun!
1278
01:19:59,120 --> 01:20:01,760
Get going. I'll hold 'em off.
1279
01:20:06,480 --> 01:20:09,439
(Laughs)
1280
01:20:21,200 --> 01:20:24,159
You'll pay for that window!
You'll pay for it. Do you hear?
1281
01:20:42,760 --> 01:20:44,479
Hey-yaargh!
1282
01:20:59,680 --> 01:21:01,239
Argh!
1283
01:21:02,480 --> 01:21:05,757
You clumsy great lout!
Can't you be more careful?
1284
01:21:05,840 --> 01:21:07,797
You've ruined my petit point.
1285
01:21:17,920 --> 01:21:21,152
It could never have happened
before the Revolution.
1286
01:21:24,080 --> 01:21:26,037
(Groans)
1287
01:21:38,920 --> 01:21:43,233
Oh, beautiful things! Irreplaceable.
1288
01:21:43,320 --> 01:21:45,277
(Shrieks and laughs)
1289
01:21:59,520 --> 01:22:02,877
Wait! Mind the vase.
1290
01:22:03,960 --> 01:22:05,110
Ready?
1291
01:22:16,920 --> 01:22:20,709
Oh, no! One of the finest collections in France.
1292
01:22:20,800 --> 01:22:23,918
Ruined! Ruined! Gone for ever.
1293
01:22:45,960 --> 01:22:48,475
SOLDIER: Go on!
1294
01:23:30,000 --> 01:23:31,957
(Pommfrit laughs)
1295
01:23:33,160 --> 01:23:34,230
Oh, no!
1296
01:23:41,640 --> 01:23:43,597
(Cackles)
1297
01:23:50,960 --> 01:23:53,077
Won't be a minute, Duke.
1298
01:23:53,160 --> 01:23:54,799
Oh, no! Not the harp.
1299
01:23:57,560 --> 01:23:59,517
POMMFRIT: Ah-ha! Ooh, I say!
1300
01:24:09,600 --> 01:24:11,910
- (Pommfrit laughs)
- Thank you, Duke.
1301
01:24:16,440 --> 01:24:20,036
Vandals! This took years to make.
1302
01:24:20,120 --> 01:24:22,077
Oh, beautiful thing!
1303
01:24:29,400 --> 01:24:32,632
Bidet! Bidet! Speak to me.
1304
01:24:32,720 --> 01:24:34,473
Waargh.
1305
01:24:34,560 --> 01:24:36,517
Oh...my bust!
1306
01:24:36,600 --> 01:24:39,798
Oh, beautiful thing.
1307
01:24:43,920 --> 01:24:45,274
Ha-ha!
1308
01:24:50,040 --> 01:24:51,997
- Ol�!
- Oh, shut up. Get the girls.
1309
01:25:01,760 --> 01:25:03,479
Look out, Rodney!
1310
01:25:05,560 --> 01:25:08,280
Oh, no! What have I done?
1311
01:25:08,360 --> 01:25:09,714
(Gasp of shock)
1312
01:25:09,800 --> 01:25:11,996
Well, Cheeseface, the reckoning has come.
1313
01:25:12,080 --> 01:25:14,037
All right, Sir Rodney. You win. I give up.
1314
01:25:14,120 --> 01:25:15,918
What shall we do with him, Darcy?
1315
01:25:16,000 --> 01:25:19,710
Well, there are lots of things we could do.
Hang him, drown him...
1316
01:25:19,800 --> 01:25:22,793
- Or just ventilate him!
- I'm coming, Citizen, sir!
1317
01:25:25,880 --> 01:25:26,836
Oh, no!
1318
01:25:26,920 --> 01:25:30,038
Oh, oh, no, no, no!
1319
01:25:30,120 --> 01:25:31,998
Darcy, bring the girls!
1320
01:25:36,280 --> 01:25:40,399
DARCY: Come on. Let's get out of here.
Come on, Pommfrit.
1321
01:25:40,480 --> 01:25:42,437
CAMEMBERT: Pull it up!
1322
01:25:42,520 --> 01:25:45,399
Up a bit! I'm holding it.
1323
01:25:48,320 --> 01:25:49,993
DARCY: Let's get out of here.
1324
01:26:11,040 --> 01:26:12,997
Anyway, we've drawn a big crowd.
1325
01:26:13,080 --> 01:26:17,518
I have, you mean. You don't think they've come
to see your miserable head fall, do you?
1326
01:26:17,600 --> 01:26:19,796
I hope the rain keeps off. I forgot my hat.
1327
01:26:19,880 --> 01:26:23,317
Thank goodness
the accursed Fingernail is not here to see this.
1328
01:26:23,400 --> 01:26:25,232
I've got news for you.
1329
01:26:26,360 --> 01:26:28,591
I wouldn't have missed this for the world.
1330
01:26:30,240 --> 01:26:32,516
(Laughs)
1331
01:26:32,600 --> 01:26:34,751
(Crowd cheers)
1332
01:26:34,840 --> 01:26:36,593
? Wedding March
1333
01:26:36,680 --> 01:26:38,876
Nice way to keep a bargain, I must say!
1334
01:26:38,960 --> 01:26:41,998
What's the matter?
I promised you a title, and he's got one.
1335
01:26:42,080 --> 01:26:43,719
I hate to think what it is.
1336
01:26:43,800 --> 01:26:46,634
(Cackles)
109309
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