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1
00:00:08,818 --> 00:00:10,554
We stole her from
Livingston‐Kent.
2
00:00:10,554 --> 00:00:12,122
‐ Bob Livingston fired me.
3
00:00:12,122 --> 00:00:13,523
I pushed him back
into the arms of his wife.
4
00:00:13,523 --> 00:00:15,392
‐ You should have pushed
him into a woodchipper.
5
00:00:15,392 --> 00:00:18,161
‐ She spent eight years straight
in the Platinum Ring of Esteem.
6
00:00:18,161 --> 00:00:19,329
‐ What's the
Platinum Ring of Esteem?
7
00:00:19,329 --> 00:00:23,166
‐ It's just this club for people
who do ten million dollars
8
00:00:23,166 --> 00:00:25,302
in volume over a
12‐month period.
9
00:00:25,302 --> 00:00:28,805
‐ The world always assumes that
people who investigate heresies
10
00:00:28,805 --> 00:00:30,206
must be heretics.
11
00:00:30,206 --> 00:00:31,841
I would remind you
of the Travis house.
12
00:00:31,841 --> 00:00:33,777
‐ Those things,
they can hurt you.
13
00:00:33,777 --> 00:00:35,245
They are dangerous.
14
00:00:35,245 --> 00:00:36,546
[ Screaming ]
15
00:00:37,113 --> 00:00:38,782
♪ Gentle music ♪
16
00:00:38,782 --> 00:00:40,383
[ Elevator arriving chime ]
17
00:00:43,253 --> 00:00:44,621
[ August sighs ]
18
00:00:49,092 --> 00:00:50,527
‐ Post‐mortem in five, kids.
19
00:00:53,230 --> 00:00:55,232
[ Bag down ]
20
00:00:57,434 --> 00:00:59,135
‐ What exactly
was that thing?
21
00:00:59,135 --> 00:01:00,070
[ Sigh ]
22
00:01:00,070 --> 00:01:01,371
‐ We call it
a Roadie.
23
00:01:01,371 --> 00:01:03,273
We're going to cover
it all in the wrap‐up.
24
00:01:03,273 --> 00:01:04,641
‐ Those poor people.
25
00:01:05,442 --> 00:01:07,143
Nearly killed each other.
26
00:01:07,143 --> 00:01:08,612
‐ Speaking of
near‐death experiences,
27
00:01:09,512 --> 00:01:11,414
tomorrow night is
the big night.
28
00:01:11,414 --> 00:01:14,050
Platinum Ring of Esteem
annual banquet.
29
00:01:14,050 --> 00:01:15,385
Prom with business cards.
30
00:01:17,287 --> 00:01:19,289
‐ We mock what we
do not understand.
31
00:01:19,289 --> 00:01:20,323
‐ Seriously, though.
32
00:01:20,323 --> 00:01:23,360
Lifetime Achievement Award
at your tender age.
33
00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:25,562
‐ Some of us choose to
measure our lives in closings
34
00:01:25,562 --> 00:01:27,264
rather than years.
35
00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:32,402
‐ Look, sorry, Anthony. Um...
36
00:01:33,403 --> 00:01:34,838
[ Sighs ]
37
00:01:34,838 --> 00:01:36,539
No, that's great.
38
00:01:36,539 --> 00:01:38,441
Yes, no, thank you
for cleaning the house.
39
00:01:38,441 --> 00:01:39,776
I'm sure the
adoption agency people
40
00:01:39,776 --> 00:01:41,778
are going to be very impressed.
41
00:01:42,112 --> 00:01:45,248
Ah, just one more quick meeting
and then I'll be home.
42
00:01:45,248 --> 00:01:47,117
I'll heat it up.
43
00:01:47,117 --> 00:01:49,386
God, Anthony, it's a meatloaf,
not a donor organ.
44
00:01:49,386 --> 00:01:51,121
It'll keep.
45
00:01:51,121 --> 00:01:52,422
Yes, okay.
46
00:01:53,189 --> 00:01:55,058
I love you.
I gotta go. Bye.
47
00:01:55,058 --> 00:01:56,126
[ Hang up beep ]
48
00:01:56,560 --> 00:01:59,129
‐ All right, how long
is this thing going to take?
49
00:01:59,129 --> 00:02:01,131
‐ It shouldn't be too long.
50
00:02:01,131 --> 00:02:04,200
‐ Remarkable resilience
for a Roadie.
51
00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:06,403
I've never seen one
with such...
52
00:02:06,403 --> 00:02:08,138
Violent tendencies.
53
00:02:08,138 --> 00:02:09,539
‐ Okay...
54
00:02:09,539 --> 00:02:11,808
Let's wrap this up;
get into the weekend. ‐
55
00:02:11,808 --> 00:02:14,544
‐ Oh! You've got two new calls
from that reporter ‐‐
56
00:02:14,544 --> 00:02:16,513
Maria something?
57
00:02:16,513 --> 00:02:17,781
Uh, channel seven.
58
00:02:17,781 --> 00:02:19,783
‐ Yeah, she's been bugging
the cops, too.
59
00:02:19,783 --> 00:02:21,218
Where is Susan?
60
00:02:21,218 --> 00:02:22,452
‐ God, can we please
start without her?
61
00:02:22,452 --> 00:02:24,154
I've got places to be.
62
00:02:24,154 --> 00:02:27,290
‐ Sorry, I was just packing up a
little homework for the weekend.
63
00:02:27,290 --> 00:02:28,525
‐ Martyr.
64
00:02:28,525 --> 00:02:30,794
‐ Can we do
this please? Phil?
65
00:02:30,794 --> 00:02:32,362
‐ Okay...
66
00:02:32,529 --> 00:02:35,298
We worked the Jackson house
for two weeks.
67
00:02:35,799 --> 00:02:39,069
Mid‐level engagement
associated with an old fella
68
00:02:39,069 --> 00:02:41,271
who died in the upstairs bedroom
20 years ago
69
00:02:41,271 --> 00:02:43,073
but never got the memo.
70
00:02:43,073 --> 00:02:45,809
Luke helped him move on
but, in doing so,
71
00:02:45,809 --> 00:02:47,510
revealed our next contestant.
72
00:02:47,510 --> 00:02:49,779
‐ Basically a class‐three
shapeshifting demon
73
00:02:49,779 --> 00:02:52,549
that bounces from person
to person looking for a home.
74
00:02:52,549 --> 00:02:54,784
They are attracted
to our type of houses.
75
00:02:54,784 --> 00:02:57,254
They feed on
the spiritual turbulence.
76
00:02:57,254 --> 00:02:59,422
Heavier the engagement,
tastier the meal.
77
00:02:59,422 --> 00:03:01,291
Basically, it looks for
bad places to live
78
00:03:01,291 --> 00:03:03,260
and makes them worse.
79
00:03:03,260 --> 00:03:05,262
‐ What do they look like?
80
00:03:05,262 --> 00:03:07,397
‐ See, that's the thing
about Roadies...
81
00:03:07,397 --> 00:03:10,133
they have no corporeal mass
of their own‐‐
82
00:03:10,133 --> 00:03:12,802
only the host they occupy
at any given moment.
83
00:03:12,802 --> 00:03:14,404
‐ So, you've seen
these things before?
84
00:03:14,404 --> 00:03:15,805
‐ Only twice.
85
00:03:15,805 --> 00:03:18,275
Fortunately, that was enough
for our man, August,
86
00:03:18,275 --> 00:03:20,810
to figure out how modify the
M. E. D. to take it apart nicely.
87
00:03:20,810 --> 00:03:23,380
And that is what
saved our bacon tonight.
88
00:03:23,380 --> 00:03:25,282
‐ PHIL:
Yeah!
89
00:03:25,282 --> 00:03:27,117
[ Whooping ]
90
00:03:27,117 --> 00:03:29,753
‐ To be prepared
is half the victory.
91
00:03:29,753 --> 00:03:31,288
Cervantes.
92
00:03:31,521 --> 00:03:34,057
‐ Man, those Roadies
played rough.
93
00:03:34,057 --> 00:03:36,126
You saw what those Jackson kids
did to their parents.
94
00:03:36,126 --> 00:03:38,194
‐ Yeah. But that's
not the worst of it.
95
00:03:38,194 --> 00:03:41,398
‐ Mm‐mm. If they manage to stay
in the host long enough,
96
00:03:41,398 --> 00:03:43,199
they can take over.
97
00:03:43,199 --> 00:03:45,101
‐ Take over... how?
98
00:03:45,101 --> 00:03:48,171
‐ You know those stories you
hear about the nice, responsible
99
00:03:48,171 --> 00:03:51,775
insurance guy with a nice yard
who goes crazy one day
100
00:03:51,775 --> 00:03:54,244
and kills his entire family
with an axe?
101
00:03:54,244 --> 00:03:55,545
‐ My god.
102
00:03:55,545 --> 00:03:58,248
‐ Doesn't always go that way,
but often enough to, you know‐‐
103
00:03:58,248 --> 00:04:00,116
[ Alarm rings ]
104
00:04:00,116 --> 00:04:02,519
‐ Ooh. That's not
a happy sound.
105
00:04:02,519 --> 00:04:04,154
‐ AUGUST:
That is the breach alarm.
106
00:04:04,154 --> 00:04:05,255
‐ Zooey,
107
00:04:05,255 --> 00:04:07,390
lock down the elevators
and the stairwell, please.
108
00:04:07,390 --> 00:04:08,525
Talk to me, Augie.
109
00:04:08,525 --> 00:04:09,826
‐ Checking now.
110
00:04:09,826 --> 00:04:11,127
‐ What? Is there a fire?
111
00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:12,329
‐ I wish.
112
00:04:12,329 --> 00:04:15,131
‐ I think something
followed us home.
113
00:04:15,131 --> 00:04:16,499
♪ Opening score ♪
114
00:04:22,839 --> 00:04:24,407
[ Man screams ]
115
00:04:26,343 --> 00:04:27,811
‐ AUGUST:
Bear in mind that this
116
00:04:27,811 --> 00:04:30,513
merely indicates presence,
not location.
117
00:04:30,513 --> 00:04:32,515
‐ Now, how did it survive
that blast from the M. E. D.?
118
00:04:32,515 --> 00:04:33,817
‐ It didn't.
119
00:04:33,817 --> 00:04:35,252
It was gone.
120
00:04:35,252 --> 00:04:37,387
Ontologically disassembled.
121
00:04:37,387 --> 00:04:38,321
‐ And yet here it is.
122
00:04:38,321 --> 00:04:40,056
‐ I killed it.
123
00:04:40,056 --> 00:04:41,291
It's dead.
124
00:04:41,291 --> 00:04:43,126
‐ So, I talked to
the building sup.
125
00:04:43,126 --> 00:04:45,395
He's shutting down the elevators
at the ninth floor
126
00:04:45,395 --> 00:04:46,563
and securing
the stairwell.
127
00:04:46,563 --> 00:04:50,267
‐ We have to walk down ten
flights of stairs to get out?
128
00:04:50,267 --> 00:04:52,535
‐ Do you want to
tell her or can I?
129
00:04:52,535 --> 00:04:54,804
‐ Until we manage to wipe this
thing out properly,
130
00:04:54,804 --> 00:04:56,473
we can't take a chance
on letting it out.
131
00:04:56,473 --> 00:04:58,208
‐ Lockdown, baby.
132
00:04:58,208 --> 00:04:59,809
[ Scoffs ]
133
00:04:59,809 --> 00:05:01,344
‐ You're kidding?
134
00:05:03,246 --> 00:05:04,614
He's kidding, right?
135
00:05:05,515 --> 00:05:07,117
‐ ZOOEY:
Nope.
136
00:05:07,117 --> 00:05:08,118
So, we're stuck here?
137
00:05:08,118 --> 00:05:09,219
For how long?
138
00:05:09,219 --> 00:05:11,254
‐ Well, hopefully not for long
but you saw how that thing
139
00:05:11,254 --> 00:05:13,023
hopped from person to person.
140
00:05:13,290 --> 00:05:15,258
We can't risk it
getting out of here.
141
00:05:15,258 --> 00:05:18,128
‐ Can it pass through
walls and doors?
142
00:05:18,128 --> 00:05:20,530
‐ Were you not
paying attention?
143
00:05:20,530 --> 00:05:23,567
It doesn't have a body
except for the host.
144
00:05:23,567 --> 00:05:26,536
It's a Roadie;
never travels alone,
145
00:05:26,536 --> 00:05:28,338
only with the band.
146
00:05:28,338 --> 00:05:30,407
‐ So, how did
it get up here?
147
00:05:30,407 --> 00:05:32,375
‐ It found a host.
148
00:05:33,276 --> 00:05:35,078
♪ Suspenseful music ♪
149
00:05:36,246 --> 00:05:37,614
[ Deep sigh ]
150
00:05:40,517 --> 00:05:42,452
‐ Oh, come on!
151
00:05:42,452 --> 00:05:44,387
‐ The truth is
we don't know.
152
00:05:44,387 --> 00:05:47,190
This thing can sit dormant
in a person for...
153
00:05:47,190 --> 00:05:48,258
Phil, help me out here.
154
00:05:48,258 --> 00:05:51,127
‐ Latency seems to be
uncomfortable for Roadies.
155
00:05:51,127 --> 00:05:52,028
They...
156
00:05:52,028 --> 00:05:55,098
They like to move around,
like a virus.
157
00:05:55,332 --> 00:05:57,567
It infects different people
and takes control
158
00:05:57,567 --> 00:06:00,537
after varying periods of
dormancy and the host
159
00:06:00,537 --> 00:06:02,138
never knows until...
160
00:06:03,273 --> 00:06:05,408
he wakes up holding the axe.
[ Stabbing sounds ]
161
00:06:06,142 --> 00:06:08,445
‐ It was around eight P. M.
when we last saw this thing‐‐
162
00:06:08,445 --> 00:06:10,280
when August thought
that he killed it.
163
00:06:10,280 --> 00:06:12,182
‐ Oh, August
killed it, all right.
164
00:06:12,182 --> 00:06:13,383
‐ Your tech says otherwise.
165
00:06:13,383 --> 00:06:15,785
‐ Then there was
more than one.
166
00:06:15,785 --> 00:06:17,487
‐ A Mary‐Kate and Ashley?
167
00:06:19,155 --> 00:06:20,257
Uh...
168
00:06:20,257 --> 00:06:21,558
I guess it's possible.
169
00:06:21,558 --> 00:06:23,260
‐ Okay.
170
00:06:24,060 --> 00:06:25,128
We stay here for now.
171
00:06:25,128 --> 00:06:27,297
We keep an eye on each other
and we see what pops up.
172
00:06:27,297 --> 00:06:28,331
‐ For how long?
173
00:06:28,331 --> 00:06:30,800
‐ Until we find it and August
smokes it for real.
174
00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:34,070
Phil, do your thing.
See what else you can find out‐‐
175
00:06:34,070 --> 00:06:37,274
And you might want to
look at your own device.
176
00:06:37,540 --> 00:06:39,276
We are on the buddy system.
177
00:06:39,276 --> 00:06:42,045
Susan, you and I can talk
about the Menendez proposal
178
00:06:42,045 --> 00:06:43,380
in my office.
179
00:06:43,380 --> 00:06:45,248
You guys
stick together.
180
00:06:45,248 --> 00:06:47,484
Eyes on each other
all the time.
181
00:06:48,518 --> 00:06:51,187
‐ You've got somebody
to feed Schrodinger?
182
00:06:51,187 --> 00:06:53,523
‐ Yes, I‐‐I'll
call my neighbor.
183
00:06:53,523 --> 00:06:56,526
‐ I gotta call Anthony.
He's gonna freak out.
184
00:06:57,260 --> 00:06:58,795
‐ Yeah, I got people
I gotta call, too.
185
00:06:58,795 --> 00:07:01,064
‐ Why don't you go ahead and get
us some food while you're at it.
186
00:07:01,064 --> 00:07:02,265
Okay, what sounds good?
187
00:07:02,265 --> 00:07:03,800
‐ Mm... a morphine drip?
188
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:05,135
‐ How's Chinese food?
189
00:07:05,135 --> 00:07:07,137
Is that okay with everybody?
190
00:07:07,137 --> 00:07:08,471
‐ Chinese.
191
00:07:08,471 --> 00:07:10,073
‐ Great. And get the usual.
192
00:07:10,073 --> 00:07:11,408
In the meantime...
193
00:07:13,810 --> 00:07:16,112
Let's all keep our eyes
on each other.
194
00:07:16,112 --> 00:07:17,480
Susan?
195
00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:25,021
[ Sigh ]
196
00:07:26,156 --> 00:07:28,124
[ Three phone lines trilling ]
197
00:07:28,124 --> 00:07:29,492
‐ ALL THREE:
Hello?
198
00:07:30,126 --> 00:07:32,128
‐ No, it's just one of
those work things, Megan.
199
00:07:32,128 --> 00:07:33,797
It could be late.
200
00:07:33,797 --> 00:07:35,632
Certainly no longer
than absolutely necessary.
201
00:07:38,802 --> 00:07:40,804
Okay, bye.
202
00:07:40,804 --> 00:07:42,405
[ Phone drops on desk ]
203
00:07:42,405 --> 00:07:44,207
‐ Just how long are we
going to be stuck here?
204
00:07:44,207 --> 00:07:45,475
‐ It's hard to say.
205
00:07:45,475 --> 00:07:49,112
‐ I don't have to tell you that
I am accepting a major award
206
00:07:49,112 --> 00:07:50,413
in less than 24 hours
207
00:07:50,413 --> 00:07:53,316
and there are certain acts of...
personal maintenance
208
00:07:53,316 --> 00:07:55,252
that need to take place
between now and then.
209
00:07:55,252 --> 00:07:57,120
‐ You look great.
You always look great.
210
00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:58,788
‐ To the untrained eye.
211
00:07:58,788 --> 00:08:02,792
In my own mind, I'm the chick
in the tub in room 237
212
00:08:02,792 --> 00:08:04,294
of the Overlook Hotel.
213
00:08:06,429 --> 00:08:08,531
‐ Look, you are just being
too hard on yourself.
214
00:08:08,531 --> 00:08:11,067
‐ But it is my night, Luke.
215
00:08:11,067 --> 00:08:13,136
It's my one night!
216
00:08:13,136 --> 00:08:15,805
I'll never win an Oscar,
or a Stanley Cup
217
00:08:15,805 --> 00:08:17,807
and the Nobel Prize committee
has an obvious
218
00:08:17,807 --> 00:08:20,176
anti‐real estate bias.
219
00:08:20,176 --> 00:08:22,112
Are you really going to
deny me exfoliation
220
00:08:22,112 --> 00:08:24,447
on my very special day?
221
00:08:24,447 --> 00:08:26,516
Are you that cruel?
222
00:08:26,516 --> 00:08:28,184
‐ I am not denying you anything.
223
00:08:28,184 --> 00:08:29,319
But if this thing
is inside of you,
224
00:08:29,319 --> 00:08:30,487
you don't want it popping out
in the middle of your
225
00:08:30,487 --> 00:08:34,391
acceptance speech and do
some kind of Roadie Rumspringa.
226
00:08:34,391 --> 00:08:36,259
It's going to do nothing
for your personal brand.
227
00:08:36,259 --> 00:08:39,162
Now, do you want to talk
Menendez or not?
228
00:08:39,529 --> 00:08:41,064
[ Deep sigh ]
229
00:08:41,064 --> 00:08:42,299
♪ Gentle music ♪
230
00:08:42,299 --> 00:08:43,800
‐ Yes.
231
00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:46,436
‐ I don't know, Jeffrey!
It's part of my job.
232
00:08:46,436 --> 00:08:48,405
Well, maybe if you ever
had a job, you'd understand.
233
00:08:48,405 --> 00:08:51,408
‐ I thought you'd understand,
but I guess not.
234
00:08:51,408 --> 00:08:52,576
You're stressed out?
235
00:08:52,576 --> 00:08:55,145
Anthony, how do you
think I feel?
236
00:08:55,145 --> 00:08:58,114
Quite honestly, the longer
I stand here talking to you,
237
00:08:58,114 --> 00:09:00,784
‐ ...the longer cat food soaks
in the warm water,
238
00:09:00,784 --> 00:09:02,385
the better she likes it.
239
00:09:03,253 --> 00:09:06,256
No, I'm all out of
the canned food she prefers.
240
00:09:06,256 --> 00:09:09,392
I didn't get to the, uh...
[ Deep rumble ]
241
00:09:09,392 --> 00:09:11,127
♪ Ominous music ♪
242
00:09:11,127 --> 00:09:12,429
[ Squelching ]
243
00:09:15,398 --> 00:09:17,133
To the, uh...
244
00:09:17,534 --> 00:09:19,236
store.
245
00:09:20,804 --> 00:09:24,241
I'm afraid we'll all have to
struggle through this together.
246
00:09:27,344 --> 00:09:29,045
♪ Gentle music ♪
247
00:09:29,779 --> 00:09:31,781
‐ PHIL:
Boy, it's a crowded field.
248
00:09:32,816 --> 00:09:34,551
Okay...
249
00:09:34,551 --> 00:09:36,353
The Slavs call it a Leshy.
250
00:09:37,654 --> 00:09:40,557
The Japanese have a
shape‐shifting trickster fox
251
00:09:40,557 --> 00:09:42,726
called a Kitsune.
252
00:09:42,726 --> 00:09:45,328
For the Algonquins,
a Wendigo.
253
00:09:45,328 --> 00:09:48,198
When it possessed somebody,
254
00:09:48,198 --> 00:09:50,100
it developed
a violent compulsion
255
00:09:50,100 --> 00:09:51,735
to feast on human flesh.
256
00:09:51,735 --> 00:09:53,136
[ Phone reminder chime ]
257
00:09:53,136 --> 00:09:54,638
‐ Hn! Who's hungry?
258
00:09:57,307 --> 00:10:00,176
‐ I had no idea you could
break them down by income.
259
00:10:00,176 --> 00:10:01,545
‐ Used to be you couldn't.
260
00:10:01,545 --> 00:10:03,079
But I developed
this algorithm
261
00:10:03,079 --> 00:10:04,748
that scrapes the
property tax database
262
00:10:04,748 --> 00:10:06,316
and extrapolates
household income
263
00:10:06,316 --> 00:10:07,784
on a separate tab.
264
00:10:07,784 --> 00:10:09,185
‐ Whew. It's fantastic.
265
00:10:09,185 --> 00:10:11,288
‐ Mm‐hm.
‐ Is it legal?
266
00:10:11,288 --> 00:10:13,323
‐ Susan Ireland:
real estate renegade.
267
00:10:15,292 --> 00:10:17,060
‐ Dinner's downstairs.
268
00:10:17,060 --> 00:10:19,329
‐ Why is it downstairs?
He usually brings it upstairs.
269
00:10:19,329 --> 00:10:21,565
‐ Ah, 'cause he can usually
use the elevator.
270
00:10:21,565 --> 00:10:22,732
‐ So where is our dinner?
271
00:10:22,732 --> 00:10:24,701
‐ Down at the security desk.
272
00:10:24,701 --> 00:10:27,837
Larry is probably sniffing
your Crab Rangoon as we speak.
273
00:10:27,837 --> 00:10:29,239
‐ Larry the, uh...
274
00:10:29,239 --> 00:10:31,641
‐ Larry the
security guard.
275
00:10:31,641 --> 00:10:33,710
You know ‐‐ the one
who looks at Susan the way
276
00:10:33,710 --> 00:10:35,245
Kanye looks at Kanye.
277
00:10:35,245 --> 00:10:36,746
♪ Mischievous music ♪
278
00:10:43,220 --> 00:10:45,222
‐ Yeah. Just do
the voice.
279
00:10:48,091 --> 00:10:49,593
‐ Larry!
280
00:10:49,759 --> 00:10:51,328
Hey, you!
281
00:10:51,328 --> 00:10:53,129
[ Fluorescent tubes buzz ]
282
00:10:54,130 --> 00:10:56,099
[ Papers rustle ]
283
00:11:03,073 --> 00:11:04,608
‐ What are these?
284
00:11:04,741 --> 00:11:07,110
‐ The Jacksons had 'em
up on the fridge.
285
00:11:07,110 --> 00:11:10,680
Think the youngest kid drew 'em
when he was chock full o' demon.
286
00:11:10,680 --> 00:11:12,282
‐ What do they mean?
287
00:11:12,282 --> 00:11:14,017
‐ Swirls, chaos...
288
00:11:14,784 --> 00:11:16,319
Two parents,
one sibling...
289
00:11:17,220 --> 00:11:18,655
Who knows?
290
00:11:18,655 --> 00:11:20,257
‐ We should probably
take turns
291
00:11:20,257 --> 00:11:21,091
getting some sleep.
292
00:11:21,091 --> 00:11:24,160
Two of us need to be awake
at all times.
293
00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:27,731
‐ Well, I need a tool
from my workshop.
294
00:11:28,164 --> 00:11:29,733
Who would like to
accompany me to witness
295
00:11:29,733 --> 00:11:33,136
any horrid transformations
that might take place?
296
00:11:33,703 --> 00:11:36,306
‐ Oh, I'd buy
a ticket for that.
297
00:11:38,675 --> 00:11:40,343
[ Light switch clicks ]
298
00:11:40,343 --> 00:11:42,045
♪ Gentle music ♪
299
00:11:42,779 --> 00:11:44,814
[ Electronic hums
and whooshes ]
300
00:11:44,814 --> 00:11:46,216
‐ It's like
301
00:11:46,216 --> 00:11:48,552
Marie Curie/
Edgar Allen Poe
302
00:11:48,552 --> 00:11:50,787
gave birth to Steve Jobs
and we're
303
00:11:50,787 --> 00:11:52,756
looking inside
of its brain.
304
00:11:52,756 --> 00:11:54,324
‐ I've been meaning to tidy up
305
00:11:54,324 --> 00:11:58,094
but there always seems to be
some more compelling need.
306
00:11:59,663 --> 00:12:00,830
‐ Ooh!
307
00:12:00,830 --> 00:12:03,633
Sweet Virgin Airlines!
What is that?
308
00:12:04,701 --> 00:12:07,804
‐ It was living in the furnace
of a mid‐century bungalow
309
00:12:07,804 --> 00:12:09,739
some years ago.
310
00:12:09,739 --> 00:12:11,374
It, uh, obstructed
the ventilation.
311
00:12:12,576 --> 00:12:16,279
Made it impossible to pass the
buyers' pre‐closing inspection.
312
00:12:16,279 --> 00:12:18,515
‐ Can't have that.
‐ Plus...
313
00:12:18,515 --> 00:12:20,083
it ate their cat.
314
00:12:23,753 --> 00:12:26,790
‐ Uh, I don't even understand
most of this shit.
315
00:12:26,790 --> 00:12:30,260
‐ It must be difficult to focus
when you're always
316
00:12:30,260 --> 00:12:33,630
busy trying to formulate
your next ironic remark.
317
00:12:33,630 --> 00:12:35,732
Rather lazy
intellectually, though.
318
00:12:36,733 --> 00:12:38,335
‐ Excuse me?
319
00:12:38,335 --> 00:12:40,070
[ Phone buzzes ]
320
00:12:40,070 --> 00:12:41,738
Uh, I need to take this.
321
00:12:41,738 --> 00:12:44,174
(Demonic voice creeps in)
‐ Oh, I know you do.
322
00:12:44,174 --> 00:12:45,709
‐ What is your problem?
323
00:12:45,709 --> 00:12:47,544
‐ You're strong.
324
00:12:47,544 --> 00:12:50,580
Makes me sad to see you
act so needy.
325
00:12:50,580 --> 00:12:52,215
[ Scoffs ]
‐ Needy?
326
00:12:52,716 --> 00:12:54,551
You think I'm needy?
327
00:12:54,551 --> 00:12:56,753
[ Phone buzzes ]
[ Exasperated sigh ]
328
00:12:56,753 --> 00:12:58,822
I‐I'm gonna take this and
when I get back, you and me,
329
00:12:58,822 --> 00:13:00,657
we're going to have
a little chat.
330
00:13:00,657 --> 00:13:02,225
What is it, Jeffrey?
331
00:13:02,225 --> 00:13:03,693
Why, what did she say?
332
00:13:03,693 --> 00:13:13,236
♪ Mysterious music ♪
333
00:13:13,236 --> 00:13:14,738
[ Deep rumbling ]
334
00:13:18,208 --> 00:13:19,743
[ Squelching ]
335
00:13:29,119 --> 00:13:30,620
[ Squelching ]
336
00:13:32,355 --> 00:13:34,257
[ Door rumbles closed ]
337
00:13:34,824 --> 00:13:37,260
‐ So, this one version
of the Roadie
338
00:13:37,260 --> 00:13:39,329
supposedly manifests
in a large
339
00:13:39,329 --> 00:13:41,064
red, bird‐shaped rash
340
00:13:41,765 --> 00:13:43,767
on the infected person's
left buttock.
341
00:13:46,136 --> 00:13:49,739
‐ What exactly am I supposed
to do with that information?
342
00:13:49,739 --> 00:13:51,741
[ Phone dings ]
‐ Hm.
343
00:13:52,142 --> 00:13:54,244
[ Text whoosh ]
‐ Oh, God.
344
00:13:55,779 --> 00:13:57,314
[ Button clicks ]
345
00:13:59,316 --> 00:14:01,051
[ Text sent swoop ]
346
00:14:01,051 --> 00:14:03,119
[ Text whooshes,
clicks and swoops ]
347
00:14:12,295 --> 00:14:13,797
♪ Gentle music ♪
348
00:14:14,698 --> 00:14:16,132
[ Phone down on table ]
349
00:14:16,132 --> 00:14:17,634
‐ Trouble at home?
350
00:14:19,102 --> 00:14:22,772
‐ I told you Anthony and I
are trying to adopt?
351
00:14:22,772 --> 00:14:25,375
Well, the people are
coming over tomorrow morning.
352
00:14:25,775 --> 00:14:27,210
Anthony's freaking out.
353
00:14:27,210 --> 00:14:29,012
‐ They're gonna love you.
354
00:14:29,813 --> 00:14:31,781
‐ I hope so.
355
00:14:31,781 --> 00:14:34,150
‐ You can trust me
on two subjects...
356
00:14:34,150 --> 00:14:37,153
adjustable‐rate mortgages
and screwed‐up families.
357
00:14:37,287 --> 00:14:39,689
You and Anthony will be
the best dads ever.
358
00:14:39,689 --> 00:14:41,091
[ Chuckles ]
359
00:14:41,091 --> 00:14:43,093
I wish you would adopt me!
360
00:14:44,127 --> 00:14:46,596
‐ We could never afford
the wardrobe.
361
00:14:46,596 --> 00:14:48,565
‐ I cannot believe you are
breaking up with me
362
00:14:48,565 --> 00:14:50,200
over the phone right now!
363
00:14:52,602 --> 00:14:54,704
At least it's not a text.
364
00:14:57,140 --> 00:14:59,142
Can you hold that
whiny rationalization
365
00:14:59,709 --> 00:15:01,244
for a hot second?
366
00:15:05,348 --> 00:15:07,050
Augie?
367
00:15:08,685 --> 00:15:10,720
We're su‐supposed to be...
368
00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:13,156
[ Loud whoosh ]
[ Growl ]
369
00:15:13,156 --> 00:15:14,691
♪ Pulsing music ♪
370
00:15:16,626 --> 00:15:18,828
♪ Music crescendos,
fades out quickly ♪
371
00:15:18,828 --> 00:15:20,664
[ Deep breaths ]
372
00:15:20,664 --> 00:15:22,265
‐ You okay?
373
00:15:23,166 --> 00:15:25,268
‐ Oh, it was just
that stupid dream
374
00:15:25,268 --> 00:15:28,238
where you're doing a closing
375
00:15:28,238 --> 00:15:29,773
and Justin Timberlake's
the buyer
376
00:15:29,773 --> 00:15:32,776
and just as he's about to
sign the HUD‐One statement,
377
00:15:32,776 --> 00:15:35,178
he looks straight into your eyes
and starts singing
378
00:15:35,178 --> 00:15:38,081
"I'm Lovin' It"
and then his pen
379
00:15:38,081 --> 00:15:40,150
turns into this big snake.
380
00:15:40,150 --> 00:15:41,685
[ Inhales ]
381
00:15:45,789 --> 00:15:48,592
Oh, come on.
You've never had that dream?
382
00:15:49,826 --> 00:15:51,661
♪ Gentle music ♪
383
00:15:51,661 --> 00:15:53,663
Where's Zooey
and, uh...
384
00:15:54,731 --> 00:15:56,299
August?
385
00:15:57,067 --> 00:15:58,568
‐ Luke...
386
00:15:59,769 --> 00:16:01,304
I'm‐‐
387
00:16:01,304 --> 00:16:02,839
afraid we have a problem.
388
00:16:02,839 --> 00:16:04,374
♪ Music crescendos ♪
389
00:16:07,110 --> 00:16:08,478
♪ Mysterious music ♪
390
00:16:11,114 --> 00:16:12,415
[ Glass down ]
391
00:16:17,787 --> 00:16:21,224
‐ I was certain I'd blasted
that thing to smithereens.
392
00:16:21,524 --> 00:16:24,127
I still believe...
393
00:16:24,127 --> 00:16:25,428
‐ Where's Zooey?
394
00:16:26,096 --> 00:16:27,497
‐ I don't know.
395
00:16:31,434 --> 00:16:33,436
I sat down at my workbench,
396
00:16:35,272 --> 00:16:38,108
trying to figure out
how to integrate the...
397
00:16:39,576 --> 00:16:41,344
chopping mechanism
into an M. E. D.
398
00:16:43,513 --> 00:16:45,515
The next thing I knew, my‐‐
399
00:16:47,117 --> 00:16:50,287
My arms felt like they were
out of joint and‐‐
400
00:16:52,556 --> 00:16:54,791
Zooey was nowhere
to be found.
401
00:16:54,791 --> 00:16:56,259
‐ We are on lockdown.
402
00:16:56,259 --> 00:16:58,128
She is in this office.
403
00:16:58,128 --> 00:16:59,529
We'll find Zooey.
404
00:16:59,529 --> 00:17:02,799
‐ And we somehow need to
find the blades to a
405
00:17:02,799 --> 00:17:05,268
Karnaj model number 6800
406
00:17:05,268 --> 00:17:07,137
FYB food processor.
407
00:17:07,137 --> 00:17:08,438
‐ There's plenty
of time for that.
408
00:17:08,438 --> 00:17:10,106
‐ No!
409
00:17:10,106 --> 00:17:13,209
The demon focused
on those particular blades.
410
00:17:13,209 --> 00:17:15,779
It took a file
and dulled them
411
00:17:15,779 --> 00:17:17,280
Destroyed them!
412
00:17:18,114 --> 00:17:19,549
If it made that effort,
413
00:17:20,383 --> 00:17:22,118
there is something there.
414
00:17:24,254 --> 00:17:25,789
‐ Okay.
415
00:17:27,757 --> 00:17:29,392
You guys look for Zooey.
416
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:33,096
And you keep an eye
on each other.
417
00:17:35,532 --> 00:17:37,234
[ Footsteps away ]
418
00:17:38,134 --> 00:17:39,502
‐ Luke,
419
00:17:41,338 --> 00:17:43,840
what if I did to her
what those...
420
00:17:43,840 --> 00:17:45,442
boys did to‐‐?
421
00:17:45,442 --> 00:17:47,110
‐ I can't.
422
00:17:48,778 --> 00:17:50,280
Hey. It's me.
423
00:17:50,547 --> 00:17:53,183
You know that 24‐hour
Sav‐Mor on Brighton?
424
00:17:53,183 --> 00:17:55,485
Yeah, the one across
from the park.
425
00:17:56,186 --> 00:17:59,389
Do you know if they have any
high‐end small appliances?
426
00:18:02,525 --> 00:18:04,394
‐ Elevators are
still locked down.
427
00:18:04,394 --> 00:18:06,096
Stairway door
shows locked.
428
00:18:07,530 --> 00:18:09,232
‐ Zooey!
429
00:18:09,232 --> 00:18:11,534
‐ I mean, it's
a small office.
430
00:18:11,534 --> 00:18:13,803
‐ Come on, Zooey,
quit screwing around!
431
00:18:33,390 --> 00:18:35,125
♪ Ominous music swell ♪
432
00:18:40,397 --> 00:18:41,798
‐ PHIL:
Anything?
433
00:18:41,798 --> 00:18:43,400
‐ Let's check his workshop.
434
00:18:46,136 --> 00:18:47,537
[ Thud ]
435
00:18:47,537 --> 00:18:49,272
♪ Eerie music ♪
436
00:18:49,272 --> 00:18:51,041
[ Squelching ]
437
00:18:56,546 --> 00:18:58,248
[ Animalistic growls ]
438
00:19:25,075 --> 00:19:26,443
‐ Augie.
439
00:19:26,443 --> 00:19:28,111
[ Fingers snapping ]
440
00:19:30,113 --> 00:19:31,781
‐ Any luck?
‐ No.
441
00:19:31,781 --> 00:19:33,383
‐ I've been texting her.
Nothing.
442
00:19:33,383 --> 00:19:35,385
‐ Not Zooey's style
to run away.
443
00:19:35,385 --> 00:19:37,320
‐ Maybe Zooey
wasn't driving.
444
00:19:37,320 --> 00:19:38,455
‐ I need to find her.
445
00:19:38,455 --> 00:19:39,522
‐ You stay where you are.
446
00:19:39,522 --> 00:19:42,359
‐ Luke, we need
to talk to you.
447
00:19:43,126 --> 00:19:44,494
Outside.
448
00:19:46,796 --> 00:19:49,266
‐ You can speak
in front of me.
449
00:19:49,266 --> 00:19:51,234
‐ We looked in
your workshop.
450
00:19:51,434 --> 00:19:53,136
The M. E. D is dismantled.
451
00:19:54,838 --> 00:19:58,308
‐ I told you, the Roadie
filed down the blades.
452
00:19:58,308 --> 00:20:01,077
‐ And what did
you do to Zooey?
453
00:20:02,112 --> 00:20:03,547
‐ Mm, guys, chill out.
454
00:20:03,547 --> 00:20:05,782
‐ Zooey!
‐ PHIL: Where the hell were you?
455
00:20:05,782 --> 00:20:08,184
‐ I was in the hallway.
‐ And before that?
456
00:20:08,184 --> 00:20:09,519
‐ Um...
457
00:20:09,786 --> 00:20:11,354
I was...
458
00:20:11,555 --> 00:20:13,256
Ooh.
459
00:20:14,257 --> 00:20:15,792
I was, um...
460
00:20:16,793 --> 00:20:19,229
Talking on the phone
with Jeffrey and...
461
00:20:20,430 --> 00:20:22,799
I think he broke up with me.
462
00:20:23,400 --> 00:20:25,135
‐ On the phone?
463
00:20:25,135 --> 00:20:26,102
‐ Classy.
464
00:20:26,102 --> 00:20:28,271
‐ Um, I think you're
automatically disqualified
465
00:20:28,271 --> 00:20:30,340
from commenting
on awkward breakups.
466
00:20:30,340 --> 00:20:33,276
Anyway, I was talking
on the phone with Jeffrey
467
00:20:33,276 --> 00:20:35,111
and then I was...
468
00:20:36,112 --> 00:20:37,514
outside the conference room.
469
00:20:37,514 --> 00:20:39,249
[ Phone dings and buzzes ]
470
00:20:39,249 --> 00:20:41,284
‐ Let me see your eyes.
471
00:20:41,284 --> 00:20:43,119
‐ It's too bright in here.
‐ I know.
472
00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:45,055
‐ It's a text from my mom.
473
00:20:45,055 --> 00:20:47,490
"Turn on the TV, local news,
channel seven."
474
00:20:52,429 --> 00:20:54,464
‐ REPORTER:
...where an unidentified couple
475
00:20:54,464 --> 00:20:57,133
are in critical condition
tonight,
476
00:20:57,133 --> 00:21:00,270
their two pre‐teen sons
in the care of social services
477
00:21:00,270 --> 00:21:03,540
following a confrontation that
occurred earlier this evening.
478
00:21:03,540 --> 00:21:06,443
Details are sketchy,
but early reports say that
479
00:21:06,443 --> 00:21:11,047
one or both sons are responsible
for their parents' injuries.
480
00:21:11,047 --> 00:21:14,517
However, Spotlight Seven
has discovered a strange link
481
00:21:14,517 --> 00:21:17,420
between tonight's incident
and a tragedy
482
00:21:17,420 --> 00:21:20,390
that occurred under a year ago.
483
00:21:20,390 --> 00:21:23,193
Questions still linger
about the explosion
484
00:21:23,193 --> 00:21:25,295
that caused the death
of the Travis family...
485
00:21:25,295 --> 00:21:26,830
‐ Oh, dear.
486
00:21:26,830 --> 00:21:28,398
‐ REPORTER:
...but we've discovered
487
00:21:28,398 --> 00:21:29,399
that both the Travises
488
00:21:29,399 --> 00:21:32,402
and the unidentified victims
of tonight's incident
489
00:21:32,402 --> 00:21:35,372
were clients of the same
shadowy real estate firm.
490
00:21:36,273 --> 00:21:38,808
‐ Um, we are
so not shadowy.
491
00:21:38,808 --> 00:21:41,244
‐ We're a little shadowy.
492
00:21:41,244 --> 00:21:42,779
‐ ...and the police
will not comment
493
00:21:42,779 --> 00:21:44,781
on the details
of tonight's incident
494
00:21:44,781 --> 00:21:47,117
or the Travis explosion.
495
00:21:47,117 --> 00:21:48,818
But does this
seeming coincidence
496
00:21:48,818 --> 00:21:50,820
raise some troubling questions
497
00:21:50,820 --> 00:21:53,557
for other clients
of the mysterious firm?
498
00:21:53,557 --> 00:21:55,525
Reporting live, I'm Mari‐‐
499
00:21:55,525 --> 00:21:58,028
[ Remote clatters on table ]
500
00:21:58,795 --> 00:22:00,297
‐ We're so screwed.
501
00:22:04,467 --> 00:22:06,169
♪ Mysterious waltz ♪
502
00:22:24,120 --> 00:22:25,555
♪ Ominous music ♪
503
00:22:26,389 --> 00:22:28,291
[ Struggling for breath ]
504
00:22:37,801 --> 00:22:39,269
‐ ALL:
No!
505
00:22:39,402 --> 00:22:41,404
‐ Nice to see you, too.
506
00:22:42,339 --> 00:22:43,540
‐ How'd you get in here?
507
00:22:43,540 --> 00:22:45,075
‐ The security guy
brought me up.
508
00:22:45,075 --> 00:22:46,142
He has a key.
509
00:22:46,142 --> 00:22:47,377
‐ The security guy has a key?
510
00:22:47,377 --> 00:22:50,113
‐ Yeah, I think they gave it to
him roughly around the same time
511
00:22:50,113 --> 00:22:52,249
they started calling him
"the security guy."
512
00:22:52,249 --> 00:22:54,251
‐ What's going on here?
‐ It's a long story.
513
00:22:54,251 --> 00:22:55,785
The punch line is you're
gonna be stuck in here
514
00:22:55,785 --> 00:22:57,254
with us for a while.
I'll explain in a minute.
515
00:22:57,254 --> 00:22:58,788
Is that the food processor?
516
00:22:58,788 --> 00:23:01,258
‐ Uh, the last one in stock!
517
00:23:01,258 --> 00:23:04,261
Plus I had a coupon
for ten percent off.
518
00:23:07,430 --> 00:23:09,399
‐ Model number 6800‐FYB.
519
00:23:10,066 --> 00:23:11,801
Brilliant.
520
00:23:11,801 --> 00:23:13,069
Thank you.
521
00:23:13,069 --> 00:23:15,138
‐ I, uh, hope the color's okay.
522
00:23:15,138 --> 00:23:16,439
‐ Lovely.
523
00:23:16,439 --> 00:23:19,442
‐ Are you going to
give it to somebody?
524
00:23:20,277 --> 00:23:22,245
‐ I'm certainly going to try.
525
00:23:22,245 --> 00:23:23,346
♪ Mysterious music ♪
526
00:23:26,049 --> 00:23:28,251
‐ So, if that machine
didn't work the first time,
527
00:23:28,251 --> 00:23:30,387
what makes you think
it's going to work now?
528
00:23:30,387 --> 00:23:33,123
‐ First, I maintain
that it did work.
529
00:23:34,057 --> 00:23:37,460
Second, on the remote
possibility that I am wrong,
530
00:23:37,460 --> 00:23:40,063
I am significantly
increasing the speed,
531
00:23:40,063 --> 00:23:41,498
efficiency
532
00:23:41,498 --> 00:23:44,301
and lethality of the device.
533
00:23:44,301 --> 00:23:45,802
‐ So...
534
00:23:46,536 --> 00:23:50,240
we never did deconstruct
that "needy" remark.
535
00:23:51,541 --> 00:23:54,778
‐ Well, perhaps I was commenting
on your apparent need
536
00:23:54,778 --> 00:23:56,780
to be with a certain...
537
00:23:56,780 --> 00:23:58,281
type.
538
00:23:58,281 --> 00:23:59,783
[ Scoffs ]
539
00:23:59,783 --> 00:24:03,086
‐ Okay, I do not have a type.
540
00:24:05,121 --> 00:24:09,192
I‐‐ Jeffrey was nothing
like A. J. who was nothing ‐‐
541
00:24:09,192 --> 00:24:10,527
nothing like Chris.
542
00:24:12,195 --> 00:24:14,397
‐ I stand corrected.
543
00:24:14,397 --> 00:24:16,132
[ August whistles happily ]
544
00:24:22,138 --> 00:24:26,176
‐ I mean, none of them had,
like, careers to speak of but,
545
00:24:26,176 --> 00:24:28,378
once again, that's not a type.
546
00:24:28,378 --> 00:24:31,314
A.J. was studying to
become a bartender.
547
00:24:31,314 --> 00:24:33,516
Took the exam, like,
three times.
548
00:24:33,516 --> 00:24:35,785
Always tripped up
on the mojito.
549
00:24:35,785 --> 00:24:36,953
So, I came up with this
secret phrase,
550
00:24:36,953 --> 00:24:39,522
it's like a memory aid for him
to remember the ingredients ‐‐
551
00:24:39,522 --> 00:24:42,525
rum, lime, mint,
club soda, sugar, ice...
552
00:24:42,525 --> 00:24:45,795
Real Life Murders,
Crime Scene Investigators.
553
00:24:45,795 --> 00:24:47,297
That's so simple, right?
554
00:24:48,265 --> 00:24:50,233
Mmm... Not for A. J.
555
00:24:50,533 --> 00:24:52,269
And Chris?
556
00:24:52,269 --> 00:24:53,570
Chris wrote poetry.
557
00:24:54,804 --> 00:24:55,839
Used to go on these huge rants
558
00:24:55,839 --> 00:25:00,176
about how social media
was commoditizing free verse.
559
00:25:00,176 --> 00:25:04,180
"If everything's a poem,
nothing's a poem."
560
00:25:04,180 --> 00:25:07,417
So, I suggested that maybe she
was better suited for something
561
00:25:07,417 --> 00:25:09,553
like construction.
562
00:25:09,553 --> 00:25:12,122
And let's just say
that ended badly.
563
00:25:13,790 --> 00:25:15,358
And Jeffrey...
564
00:25:16,793 --> 00:25:18,361
Jeffrey does stand‐up.
565
00:25:20,397 --> 00:25:22,332
Not very funny.
566
00:25:22,332 --> 00:25:24,034
Not intentionally, at least.
567
00:25:25,135 --> 00:25:28,572
‐ Would you, uh, mind handing me
that small Allen wrench?
568
00:25:35,512 --> 00:25:38,515
All I'm saying is that
you seem to need...
569
00:25:39,449 --> 00:25:41,151
projects rather than people.
570
00:25:42,485 --> 00:25:44,221
♪ Contemplative music ♪
571
00:25:44,521 --> 00:25:47,090
‐ That's a terrible
thing to say.
572
00:25:52,395 --> 00:25:54,531
‐ You should be with someone...
573
00:25:54,531 --> 00:25:56,266
wonderful.
574
00:25:56,566 --> 00:25:59,436
But such people are
available fully assembled.
575
00:26:00,303 --> 00:26:02,405
You needn't keep
acquiring them
576
00:26:02,405 --> 00:26:04,107
in kit form.
577
00:26:13,783 --> 00:26:15,352
‐ I'm not needy.
578
00:26:16,253 --> 00:26:18,088
You're needy.
579
00:26:19,823 --> 00:26:21,391
[ Chuckles quietly ]
580
00:26:25,395 --> 00:26:27,264
♪ Music fades out ♪
581
00:26:27,264 --> 00:26:28,798
‐ MEGAN:
I can't believe it.
582
00:26:28,798 --> 00:26:30,300
‐ LUKE:
What?
583
00:26:31,268 --> 00:26:33,169
‐ That I believe it.
584
00:26:33,536 --> 00:26:35,805
‐ More things than
heaven and earth, Horatio.
585
00:26:35,805 --> 00:26:37,274
♪ Gentle music ♪
586
00:26:37,274 --> 00:26:39,242
‐ I'm a science girl, Luke.
587
00:26:39,542 --> 00:26:43,346
This haunted house demon stuff
is really a leap for me.
588
00:26:45,048 --> 00:26:47,517
The Travis thing,
that really bothers you.
589
00:26:50,787 --> 00:26:52,355
So, what
really happened?
590
00:26:54,157 --> 00:26:55,525
‐ I got sloppy.
591
00:26:57,260 --> 00:26:58,628
Complacent.
592
00:26:59,262 --> 00:27:00,564
Naive.
593
00:27:01,765 --> 00:27:05,635
I was so eager to believe that
everything would be all right
594
00:27:06,369 --> 00:27:09,139
that I ignored
that voice in my ear.
595
00:27:09,306 --> 00:27:10,807
It's just, I'm‐‐
596
00:27:12,809 --> 00:27:14,344
You already know this...
597
00:27:15,512 --> 00:27:18,381
I have this kind of connection
to these things all my life.
598
00:27:19,182 --> 00:27:22,219
I don't just see them,
I can feel them.
599
00:27:22,552 --> 00:27:24,554
And I can talk to them.
600
00:27:25,121 --> 00:27:28,525
And I can hear them talk
to me, if I listen.
601
00:27:30,160 --> 00:27:31,528
Sometimes people around me,
602
00:27:33,129 --> 00:27:34,497
they can see them.
603
00:27:35,131 --> 00:27:36,533
They can talk to them
604
00:27:37,300 --> 00:27:39,035
just because I'm there.
605
00:27:39,269 --> 00:27:42,239
‐ So, then, what happened
at the Travis house?
606
00:27:45,141 --> 00:27:47,077
‐ I didn't listen
close enough.
607
00:27:47,410 --> 00:27:49,112
‐ SUSAN:
What a waste.
608
00:27:49,779 --> 00:27:51,281
‐ Excuse me?
609
00:27:52,382 --> 00:27:54,084
‐ God, look at you.
610
00:27:54,451 --> 00:27:56,152
You're so smart.
611
00:27:56,786 --> 00:27:58,488
Fairly well‐adjusted,
all things considered.
612
00:27:59,522 --> 00:28:01,224
Objectively attractive.
613
00:28:02,259 --> 00:28:06,096
But you are just like these
houses we're trying to sell.
614
00:28:06,263 --> 00:28:07,797
Damaged.
615
00:28:08,265 --> 00:28:09,833
Horribly damaged.
616
00:28:09,833 --> 00:28:11,501
‐ Susan!
617
00:28:11,801 --> 00:28:13,536
‐ Oh, come on!
618
00:28:13,536 --> 00:28:16,339
You go from that Brock guy
to Luke here?
619
00:28:16,339 --> 00:28:19,142
You are the luckiest woman
on the planet.
620
00:28:20,410 --> 00:28:22,379
You should be
buying lotto tickets.
621
00:28:25,515 --> 00:28:27,284
What?
622
00:28:27,284 --> 00:28:29,185
‐ You guys okay?
623
00:28:29,185 --> 00:28:32,255
‐ Well, Roadies seldom occupy
the same individual twice.
624
00:28:33,056 --> 00:28:36,259
‐ August, Zooey, is the Roadie
inside either of you?
625
00:28:37,127 --> 00:28:39,362
‐ What?
‐ Just answer the question.
626
00:28:41,331 --> 00:28:43,133
‐ BOTH:
No.
627
00:28:43,133 --> 00:28:44,834
‐ How about you?
‐ No.
628
00:28:44,834 --> 00:28:47,037
‐ Megan?
‐ Of course not.
629
00:28:49,139 --> 00:28:50,507
‐ Susan?
630
00:28:50,807 --> 00:28:52,409
‐ Come on, it's not
going to just tell you.
631
00:28:52,409 --> 00:28:54,377
‐ It's this old
Nordic legend I found‐‐
632
00:28:54,377 --> 00:28:56,313
a demon called a Tregastar.
633
00:28:56,313 --> 00:28:58,515
When this thing
takes you over,
634
00:28:58,515 --> 00:29:00,217
you say
635
00:29:00,383 --> 00:29:02,385
what you feel
636
00:29:02,385 --> 00:29:04,054
and you cannot lie.
637
00:29:05,055 --> 00:29:07,090
‐ Were you always this dorky?
638
00:29:07,390 --> 00:29:09,259
Or was that something
that happened
639
00:29:09,259 --> 00:29:10,560
when you and God broke up?
640
00:29:10,560 --> 00:29:13,263
‐ Susan, is it inside you?!
641
00:29:13,263 --> 00:29:15,265
[ Demonic growl ]
642
00:29:15,265 --> 00:29:17,067
‐ PHIL:
Ah! Oh!
643
00:29:17,067 --> 00:29:18,368
♪ Edgy music ♪
644
00:29:19,135 --> 00:29:21,538
‐ The house!
You live in the house!
645
00:29:21,538 --> 00:29:23,139
‐ Screw this.
646
00:29:23,139 --> 00:29:24,407
‐ The wonderful house.
647
00:29:24,407 --> 00:29:26,176
‐ Ah!
648
00:29:26,176 --> 00:29:27,477
[ Growling ]
649
00:29:27,777 --> 00:29:29,312
‐ Get off!
650
00:29:31,281 --> 00:29:33,116
Get her off of me!
651
00:29:33,116 --> 00:29:34,417
[ Growling ]
652
00:29:38,188 --> 00:29:41,424
[ Growling stops ]
[ Susan thuds to floor ]
653
00:29:41,424 --> 00:29:43,226
[ Device powers up ]
654
00:29:44,294 --> 00:29:45,795
[ Device powers down ]
655
00:29:45,795 --> 00:29:47,797
♪ Exciting music ends ♪
656
00:29:47,797 --> 00:29:49,466
‐ SUSAN:
Oh, my god!
657
00:29:49,466 --> 00:29:52,502
‐ Where is it, Augie?
Did we get it?
658
00:29:52,802 --> 00:29:54,804
‐ It rests in pieces.
659
00:29:54,804 --> 00:29:56,406
[ Panting ]
660
00:29:56,406 --> 00:29:58,141
♪ Gentle music ♪
661
00:29:59,542 --> 00:30:03,079
‐ Put it up on the scope
and make sure.
662
00:30:06,283 --> 00:30:07,751
[ Beep]
663
00:30:07,751 --> 00:30:10,387
‐ We got five green.
We're all good.
664
00:30:11,054 --> 00:30:12,556
‐ Nice work.
665
00:30:12,556 --> 00:30:14,124
‐ Ow!
666
00:30:14,124 --> 00:30:16,526
‐ Yeah, there's gonna be
some residual stiffness.
667
00:30:16,526 --> 00:30:19,195
After having that thing bounce
around inside you a while.
668
00:30:19,195 --> 00:30:23,099
‐ No... kidding. This must be
what it feels like to be 30.
669
00:30:23,099 --> 00:30:24,367
[ Silence ]
670
00:30:24,367 --> 00:30:26,102
Ohh.
671
00:30:28,471 --> 00:30:31,274
I seriously need to sleep
for, like, two days.
672
00:30:31,274 --> 00:30:32,375
‐ Okay, I gotta
get outta here.
673
00:30:32,375 --> 00:30:36,079
‐ Zooey, call down and
have them unlock the elevator.
674
00:30:38,114 --> 00:30:39,416
‐ Oh, yeah. Um...
675
00:30:40,116 --> 00:30:41,418
One thing.
676
00:30:42,252 --> 00:30:45,555
So, just before we all
group hug and go home,
677
00:30:46,356 --> 00:30:48,158
can we just acknowledge that
678
00:30:48,525 --> 00:30:50,193
some of us...
679
00:30:50,193 --> 00:30:51,294
♪ Emotional music ♪
680
00:30:51,294 --> 00:30:54,531
said some really hurtful
shit tonight and meant it?
681
00:31:00,070 --> 00:31:03,106
‐ We've been in each other's
faces all night and you‐‐
682
00:31:03,540 --> 00:31:05,275
probably had enough of me.
683
00:31:08,111 --> 00:31:10,513
Last thing you all
need to do is
684
00:31:10,513 --> 00:31:12,515
go to some stupid
banquet tomorrow.
685
00:31:15,051 --> 00:31:16,386
‐ It's tonight.
686
00:31:24,127 --> 00:31:25,495
‐ Sorry.
687
00:31:47,350 --> 00:31:49,085
♪ Thumping party music ♪
688
00:31:49,085 --> 00:31:50,453
[ Indistinct conversations ]
689
00:32:00,797 --> 00:32:02,799
‐ RITA WEISS:
Is that her mother?
690
00:32:02,799 --> 00:32:04,768
It's got to be her mother.
691
00:32:07,404 --> 00:32:10,273
None of the others had
the guts to show their faces.
692
00:32:10,273 --> 00:32:11,374
‐ BOB LIVINGSTON:
I think that's best.
693
00:32:11,374 --> 00:32:12,409
‐ But, Bob, seriously,
694
00:32:12,409 --> 00:32:15,045
who brings their mother
to one of these things?
695
00:32:15,045 --> 00:32:17,347
‐ Leo DiCaprio brought
his mom to the Oscars.
696
00:32:17,347 --> 00:32:20,483
‐ Leonardo DiCaprio
was king of the world.
697
00:32:20,483 --> 00:32:24,454
Susan Ireland is, basically,
Daphne in Scooby Doo.
698
00:32:24,454 --> 00:32:26,189
‐ Well, they did
give our industry
699
00:32:26,189 --> 00:32:28,191
a huge slap
in the face.
700
00:32:28,191 --> 00:32:30,794
‐ Can we just...
not hand out the award?
701
00:32:30,794 --> 00:32:32,495
‐ STACEY:
Not an option.
702
00:32:32,495 --> 00:32:34,264
‐ Well, perhaps
I can talk to her.
703
00:32:34,264 --> 00:32:36,466
We used to be, uh...
704
00:32:36,466 --> 00:32:38,201
‐ Colleagues.
‐ Mmm.
705
00:32:38,201 --> 00:32:40,103
‐ STACEY:
And what are you going to say?
706
00:32:40,103 --> 00:32:43,206
‐ I'll ask her to keep it
brief and tasteful.
707
00:32:43,206 --> 00:32:44,741
She'll listen to me.
708
00:32:44,741 --> 00:32:47,310
I'm a bit of a mentor.
709
00:32:47,310 --> 00:32:49,012
‐ Mm.
710
00:32:49,446 --> 00:32:51,114
‐ BOTH:
Mentor.
711
00:32:54,217 --> 00:32:57,220
‐ Oh, go easy, honey.
Remember, you're speaking soon.
712
00:32:57,487 --> 00:33:00,457
‐ I'm targeting that fine line
that separates relaxed and witty
713
00:33:00,457 --> 00:33:02,325
from actually
opening with a dick joke.
714
00:33:02,325 --> 00:33:04,327
‐ I hope you hit it.
715
00:33:05,095 --> 00:33:06,329
‐ Susan,
716
00:33:06,329 --> 00:33:08,031
you look radiant.
717
00:33:08,265 --> 00:33:09,766
A vision.
718
00:33:10,267 --> 00:33:11,468
‐ How are you, Bob?
719
00:33:11,468 --> 00:33:13,270
‐ Fantastic!
720
00:33:13,270 --> 00:33:15,572
And this must be
your sister?
721
00:33:17,073 --> 00:33:18,441
‐ My mom, Constance.
722
00:33:19,509 --> 00:33:21,211
Mom, Bob Livingston.
723
00:33:22,045 --> 00:33:23,747
He's the guy who stepped out
of the left‐hand tub
724
00:33:23,747 --> 00:33:25,348
in that boner pill commercial.
725
00:33:25,782 --> 00:33:28,218
‐ So much for that fine line.
726
00:33:29,185 --> 00:33:31,021
‐ What a magical evening.
727
00:33:31,254 --> 00:33:34,291
Susan, could I borrow you
for half a shake?
728
00:33:38,361 --> 00:33:39,729
‐ Yep.
729
00:33:39,729 --> 00:33:41,231
‐ Great.
730
00:33:42,732 --> 00:33:44,768
A pleasure to meet you,
Constance.
731
00:33:45,802 --> 00:33:48,038
‐ Die in a fire, Bob.
732
00:33:54,277 --> 00:33:55,712
‐ BOB:
How you doin'?
733
00:33:55,712 --> 00:33:57,147
♪ Gentle music ♪
734
00:33:57,147 --> 00:33:58,782
You know, we were
all very surprised
735
00:33:58,782 --> 00:34:01,218
when you took the job
with Roman.
736
00:34:01,218 --> 00:34:02,752
It's so...
737
00:34:03,253 --> 00:34:04,721
Off‐brand.
738
00:34:04,721 --> 00:34:06,756
Running around with
that bunch of misfits.
739
00:34:06,756 --> 00:34:08,258
You're too good for this.
740
00:34:08,258 --> 00:34:09,726
‐ You fired me, Bob.
741
00:34:09,726 --> 00:34:10,961
I obviously wasn't
too good for that.
742
00:34:10,961 --> 00:34:14,197
‐ Yeah, well that was because
of my wife and she insisted.
743
00:34:14,197 --> 00:34:16,466
‐ Oh, yeah, how is Twyla?
I saw her in here earlier,
744
00:34:16,466 --> 00:34:19,769
checking that big fur coat
made from Dalmatian puppies.
745
00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:24,074
‐ I was hoping we could
keep this civil.
746
00:34:24,074 --> 00:34:26,409
Look, I'm just here as a friend
to ask you to keep your comments
747
00:34:26,409 --> 00:34:28,378
brief and tasteful.
748
00:34:28,378 --> 00:34:31,781
And not to reference your
current employer or his,
749
00:34:31,781 --> 00:34:33,783
you know, band of weirdos.
750
00:34:33,783 --> 00:34:35,452
‐ It's my agency.
751
00:34:35,452 --> 00:34:37,120
And those are my friends.
752
00:34:37,120 --> 00:34:38,521
‐ Oh.
753
00:34:38,521 --> 00:34:40,223
Yeah?
754
00:34:40,724 --> 00:34:42,192
Why aren't they here?
755
00:34:42,192 --> 00:34:43,560
To support you.
756
00:34:45,462 --> 00:34:47,364
I'm here, as a friend,
757
00:34:48,265 --> 00:34:50,267
asking you to please,
758
00:34:50,267 --> 00:34:52,402
please don't
embarrass yourself.
759
00:34:52,402 --> 00:34:54,204
And the rest of us.
760
00:34:55,739 --> 00:34:57,240
And Susan...
761
00:34:58,341 --> 00:35:00,076
Congrats!
762
00:35:08,051 --> 00:35:09,486
♪ Dance music ♪
763
00:35:20,063 --> 00:35:21,364
‐ Are you okay?
764
00:35:21,364 --> 00:35:23,099
‐ STACEY:
Good evening!
765
00:35:23,099 --> 00:35:26,102
Everyone, please
return to your seats.
766
00:35:26,102 --> 00:35:27,737
[ Light conversations ]
767
00:35:29,773 --> 00:35:31,341
Good evening
768
00:35:31,341 --> 00:35:35,712
and welcome to the awards
portion of our program.
769
00:35:35,712 --> 00:35:37,214
[ Applause ]
770
00:35:39,182 --> 00:35:41,351
Ladies and gentlemen,
771
00:35:41,351 --> 00:35:42,819
please join me in‐‐
772
00:35:42,819 --> 00:35:44,487
[ Door opens loudly ]
773
00:35:47,157 --> 00:35:48,491
♪ Funky music ♪
774
00:35:53,763 --> 00:35:55,298
‐ God.
775
00:36:08,445 --> 00:36:10,146
‐ Sorry we're late.
776
00:36:13,183 --> 00:36:15,352
You were right about
the personal maintenance.
777
00:36:16,720 --> 00:36:18,321
‐ Yeah.
778
00:36:19,389 --> 00:36:22,192
‐ As I was saying,
please join me...
779
00:36:22,192 --> 00:36:23,226
‐ Hey.
‐ Hey.
780
00:36:23,226 --> 00:36:26,796
‐ ...in welcoming the new
eight‐time laureate
781
00:36:26,796 --> 00:36:29,332
of the Platinum Ring of Esteem
782
00:36:29,332 --> 00:36:33,270
and the recipient of
our special award
783
00:36:33,270 --> 00:36:37,140
for lifetime achievement
in the real estate arts
784
00:36:37,140 --> 00:36:39,309
and sciences...
785
00:36:39,309 --> 00:36:41,177
Susan Ireland!
786
00:36:41,177 --> 00:36:42,512
♪ Uplifting music ♪
787
00:36:42,512 --> 00:36:44,314
[ Whoops and cheers ]
788
00:36:59,763 --> 00:37:01,765
[ Applause and cheers continue ]
789
00:37:05,268 --> 00:37:08,538
‐ Have none of these people
seen the movie "Carrie"?
790
00:37:08,538 --> 00:37:11,107
[ Music and applause fade out ]
791
00:37:15,745 --> 00:37:17,514
‐ Thank you.
792
00:37:17,514 --> 00:37:20,750
There are many people
I want to acknowledge.
793
00:37:20,750 --> 00:37:24,120
My mom, who is here.
794
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:26,256
My dad, who isn't,
795
00:37:26,256 --> 00:37:28,491
although I kinda
feel like he is.
796
00:37:30,093 --> 00:37:32,495
I hope he'd have
made time for it.
797
00:37:35,098 --> 00:37:36,733
My current colleagues:
798
00:37:36,733 --> 00:37:40,203
Luke, Phil, August and Zooey,
799
00:37:40,203 --> 00:37:42,339
who gave me a work‐home.
800
00:37:42,339 --> 00:37:44,074
My former colleagues,
801
00:37:44,074 --> 00:37:46,209
who made me realize
I deserved one.
802
00:37:46,209 --> 00:37:47,477
[ Snorts ]
803
00:37:48,111 --> 00:37:50,347
‐ Hope they're wearing
their asbestos underwear.
804
00:37:51,214 --> 00:37:53,783
‐ But I want to thank
all of you, too,
805
00:37:53,783 --> 00:37:56,519
for believing in...
806
00:37:56,519 --> 00:37:58,221
something.
807
00:37:58,388 --> 00:38:00,090
Anything.
808
00:38:00,323 --> 00:38:03,260
Some of you believe in me,
and for that I am
809
00:38:03,260 --> 00:38:05,262
more grateful
than you could know.
810
00:38:05,262 --> 00:38:07,130
♪ Emotional music ♪
811
00:38:07,130 --> 00:38:09,366
Some of you believe
in other things.
812
00:38:10,734 --> 00:38:12,235
Odd things,
813
00:38:12,702 --> 00:38:14,304
amazing things,
beyond imagination.
814
00:38:16,506 --> 00:38:18,241
You've opened my mind
815
00:38:19,209 --> 00:38:21,211
and that's never a bad thing.
816
00:38:22,779 --> 00:38:25,181
But, most of all,
I want to thank you ‐‐
817
00:38:25,181 --> 00:38:27,751
all of you,
everyone in this room,
818
00:38:28,218 --> 00:38:30,020
for believing in this business.
819
00:38:31,187 --> 00:38:32,489
Our business.
820
00:38:33,790 --> 00:38:35,392
The good we do,
821
00:38:35,392 --> 00:38:39,229
helping people move on
and find their way home.
822
00:38:41,798 --> 00:38:43,466
Thank you.
823
00:38:43,466 --> 00:38:45,235
[ Cheers and applause ]
824
00:38:56,112 --> 00:38:57,480
[ Whoosh ]
825
00:38:58,782 --> 00:39:00,517
‐ Oh!
‐ Ah!
826
00:39:00,517 --> 00:39:02,252
[ Crowd reaction]
827
00:39:14,564 --> 00:39:17,234
‐ ANTHONY:
The adoption police
loved us.
They weren't mean at all.
828
00:39:17,234 --> 00:39:18,301
They just wanted
to check us out.
829
00:39:18,301 --> 00:39:22,205
You know, get our views on
education and nutrition.
830
00:39:22,205 --> 00:39:23,573
Running with scissors.
831
00:39:23,740 --> 00:39:25,008
‐ So, what's next?
832
00:39:25,008 --> 00:39:27,444
‐ Well, there's still a lot of
flaming hoops to jump through,
833
00:39:27,444 --> 00:39:29,379
but so far so good.
834
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:32,182
‐ What's wrong?
835
00:39:33,383 --> 00:39:35,518
‐ There's just something
about last night.
836
00:39:35,518 --> 00:39:37,520
Can't put my finger on it.
837
00:39:38,655 --> 00:39:40,357
‐ Hm.
838
00:39:42,659 --> 00:39:44,527
‐ You were great.
839
00:39:51,568 --> 00:39:53,570
‐ Hey. Thank you
for coming.
840
00:39:55,238 --> 00:39:57,240
‐ That was a fine speech.
841
00:39:57,540 --> 00:40:00,644
What you said about
belief, believing...
842
00:40:00,644 --> 00:40:01,711
Very true.
843
00:40:01,711 --> 00:40:03,413
‐ Mm‐hm.
844
00:40:03,647 --> 00:40:06,216
‐ But the truth isn't
always welcome, is it?
845
00:40:06,216 --> 00:40:07,617
♪ Thumping music
from Zooey's car ♪
846
00:40:07,617 --> 00:40:09,619
It often comes with a cost.
847
00:40:11,388 --> 00:40:13,256
‐ Get in, Mister Needy.
848
00:40:13,256 --> 00:40:15,725
‐ I think I shall be
paying for it for a while.
849
00:40:15,725 --> 00:40:17,427
‐ Hm.
850
00:40:25,168 --> 00:40:26,570
‐ Hey, Susan!
851
00:40:27,470 --> 00:40:29,272
You were pretty badass tonight.
852
00:40:29,272 --> 00:40:30,674
[ Chuckles ]
853
00:40:38,481 --> 00:40:40,217
♪ Gentle music ♪
854
00:40:40,217 --> 00:40:42,118
‐ You really
didn't have to come.
855
00:40:42,118 --> 00:40:43,687
‐ Yeah, we really did.
856
00:40:45,655 --> 00:40:47,524
‐ What are we gonna do?
857
00:40:47,524 --> 00:40:49,559
That news story's
gonna kill us.
858
00:40:52,128 --> 00:40:53,563
‐ We'll figure it out.
859
00:40:55,732 --> 00:40:57,701
‐ I just...
860
00:40:57,701 --> 00:41:00,503
I always try so hard
to be positive.
861
00:41:01,338 --> 00:41:04,174
To make people feel good
and like me.
862
00:41:05,175 --> 00:41:08,278
But I don't always say
everything I'm thinking.
863
00:41:09,112 --> 00:41:10,580
‐ I mean, who does?
864
00:41:11,214 --> 00:41:12,549
But, Susan,
865
00:41:13,650 --> 00:41:15,352
on your worst day,
866
00:41:16,253 --> 00:41:17,587
I like you a lot.
867
00:41:17,587 --> 00:41:19,289
[ Laughs ]
868
00:41:22,525 --> 00:41:24,294
‐ Still think she's lucky.
869
00:41:24,527 --> 00:41:26,263
[ Quiet chuckles ]
870
00:41:31,268 --> 00:41:32,602
Thank you.
871
00:41:35,538 --> 00:41:37,741
‐ Hey! So, where to now?
872
00:41:37,741 --> 00:41:39,442
Wanna grab a bite?
873
00:41:41,378 --> 00:41:43,380
‐ I want to go home.
874
00:41:43,680 --> 00:41:46,483
‐ You want to go
to my place?
875
00:41:46,483 --> 00:41:48,385
‐ Mine.
876
00:41:48,385 --> 00:41:49,753
My place.
877
00:41:51,221 --> 00:41:52,556
‐ I don't‐‐
878
00:41:53,256 --> 00:41:55,458
Why do you want to go there?
I mean, we agreed...
879
00:41:55,458 --> 00:41:57,394
I didn't‐‐
880
00:41:57,394 --> 00:41:59,329
[ Uber car arrived chime ]
881
00:42:00,130 --> 00:42:01,565
Did you call an Uber?
882
00:42:04,334 --> 00:42:06,136
Megan?
883
00:42:06,136 --> 00:42:07,470
♪ Mysterious music ♪
884
00:42:09,739 --> 00:42:11,441
Megan, what's going on?
885
00:42:18,215 --> 00:42:19,549
‐ How are we tonight?
886
00:42:21,284 --> 00:42:22,652
‐ We are wonderful.
887
00:42:28,658 --> 00:42:30,627
[ Animalistic growl ]
888
00:42:30,627 --> 00:42:32,329
[ Squelching ]
889
00:42:33,163 --> 00:42:35,165
(Demonic voice)
Now take us home.
890
00:42:37,701 --> 00:42:39,502
[ Car engine revving ]
891
00:42:41,137 --> 00:42:43,306
♪ Closing credit theme ♪
62453
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