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1
00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:03,003
♪ dramatic theme playing ♪
2
00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:05,005
♪
3
00:00:05,005 --> 00:00:07,007
♪
4
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:13,222
- G-gorilla fangs, has anyone seen
gorilla fangs?
5
00:00:13,222 --> 00:00:14,848
- Right here under the murder disks.
6
00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:17,059
- And here comes the end of fun.
7
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- I didn't even say anything yet!
8
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- [sighs] This is where you yell
at us for building
9
00:00:20,270 --> 00:00:23,315
a Michael Crichton's Congo Lego set
instead of working on the ship.
10
00:00:23,315 --> 00:00:26,902
- This is New Korvo. I'm chill A-F.
Chill About Fudge.
11
00:00:26,902 --> 00:00:28,987
Uh, does this go in the space laser?
12
00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:32,032
- That's from Congo the movie.
This is based on the book.
13
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:35,410
- Lego's scraping the bottom
of the licensing barrel. That's for sure.
14
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- You sure you're not sitting there
freaking out about the mission?
15
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- Allow my cracking a beer
and unfastening my robe to answer that.
16
00:00:40,666 --> 00:00:42,000
[pops can]
[sighs]
17
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:42,501
[alarm blaring]
18
00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:44,086
That's a red alert!
We have to get to the ship!
19
00:00:44,086 --> 00:00:47,005
- Ah! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Ow! Ow! Ow!
20
00:00:47,005 --> 00:00:49,508
- Ugh This is the Lego novelization
of the film
21
00:00:49,508 --> 00:00:51,969
The Firm final battle all over again.
22
00:00:52,553 --> 00:00:54,012
- Hey, stop it, you're ruining
my best shirt!
23
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You know how many Corona Lights
I had to drink to get this?
24
00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:58,308
- Oh! The ragnar's dead!
25
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The ragnar! No! We forgot to feed it!
26
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- The what?
- Uh, I'm as Solar Opposites as they come,
27
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and I have no idea
what you're talking about.
28
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- Ragnars are a living reminder
of the spirit of the homeworld.
29
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- Now it's a dead reminder,
still works though.
30
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[sobbing]
31
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- This dead ragnar is a cautionary tale
for our lax attitudes!
32
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We're fucking up the future
of our species!
33
00:01:20,581 --> 00:01:22,207
- No, we aren't, the Pupa's fine.
34
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- He should have terraformed
the planet already!
35
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- Come on, Korvo, it's okay.
36
00:01:25,878 --> 00:01:28,672
- Yeah, we're good at being aliens.
Don't be like that.
37
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- We can't be that important, right?
38
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- We are that important!
39
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If we don't make sure
the Pupa does its thing,
40
00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:35,179
our way of life will be over!
41
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- Aren't there, like, 99 other ships
doing the same thing we are?
42
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- Wh-wh-what do you mean?
43
00:01:40,225 --> 00:01:42,144
- That's what you say every morning to us
44
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when you re-explain our origin story.
45
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Take a look!
46
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KORVO:
Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia.
47
00:01:49,776 --> 00:01:51,653
Until the asteroid hit.
48
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:55,240
One hundred adults and their replicants
were issued a Pupa
49
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and escaped into, uh, the space,
50
00:01:57,367 --> 00:01:59,703
searching for new homes
on uninhabited worlds.
51
00:02:00,412 --> 00:02:03,373
We crashed on Earth, stranding us
on an already overpopulated planet.
52
00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:05,083
That's right,
I've been talking this whole time.
53
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I'm the one holding the Pupa.
My name's Korvo.
54
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This is-- this is my show.
I just dropped the Pupa. Do you see me?
55
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[stammers] This is ridiculous.
56
00:02:10,714 --> 00:02:12,549
I hate Earth. It's a horrible home.
57
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People are stupid and confusing.
58
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:15,761
Why did humans stop traveling in blimps?
59
00:02:15,761 --> 00:02:18,180
Who cares if one exploded horrifically
a century ago?
60
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Get over it and bring back
the fucking blimps.
61
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♪
62
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- Oh my god, you're right!
Ninety-nine other teams.
63
00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:30,651
Odds are someone else has
already saved the homeworld!
64
00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:32,736
- And we're probably
the shittiest one of them all.
65
00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:33,737
- I have to know for sure.
66
00:02:33,737 --> 00:02:35,948
Aisha, can you scan
for signals from the other crews?
67
00:02:35,948 --> 00:02:37,199
AISHA:
I don't need to waste a scan.
68
00:02:37,199 --> 00:02:40,035
All those ships ran on the AISHA OS.
We're all connected.
69
00:02:40,035 --> 00:02:41,578
You wanna see them like a clip show?
70
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:43,789
- Ehh, sorta well-trod
territory there, Ai'eesh.
71
00:02:43,789 --> 00:02:45,582
- Let's do it on the Pretendodeck!
72
00:02:45,582 --> 00:02:47,668
You can tell it to us
like a bedtime story,
73
00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:50,254
like Fred Savage gets it
in The Princess Bride!
74
00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,631
- Ooh-ooh-ooh! Yes! I love that movie!
75
00:02:52,631 --> 00:02:55,843
I've been trying to kill you
with iocaine powder for years.
76
00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:56,593
- No, that's stupid.
77
00:02:56,593 --> 00:02:59,096
TERRY, YUMYULACK, and JESSE: [chanting]
Princess Bride! Princess Bride!
78
00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:01,390
Princess Bride! Princess Bride!
79
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:02,349
AISHA: As you wish!
80
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:03,475
TERRY and YUMYULACK: Yay!
JESSE: Yay, yay, yay!
81
00:03:03,475 --> 00:03:04,852
- We're not doing a Princess Bride.
82
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,478
You can't just chant me into doing stuff.
83
00:03:07,479 --> 00:03:08,939
TERRY, YUMYULACK, and JESSE: Yay!
84
00:03:08,939 --> 00:03:10,399
- Why does everything
always have to be fun?
85
00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:12,860
AISHA: Let me make sure
this shit is legally clearable.
86
00:03:13,694 --> 00:03:16,071
- Wow, this is just like
little Fred Savage's room!
87
00:03:16,071 --> 00:03:17,948
- Aisha, You can be the Peter Falk!
88
00:03:17,948 --> 00:03:20,617
AISHA: Initiating mustache
and glass eye protocol.
89
00:03:22,411 --> 00:03:23,287
[clears throat]
90
00:03:23,287 --> 00:03:26,999
Once upon a time, a planet was about
to get hit by an asteroid.
91
00:03:29,293 --> 00:03:33,130
Before it blew up, a hundred adults
and their crew were assigned Pupas.
92
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:39,511
And they flew into space
in search of new worlds.
93
00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:43,015
Let me tell you about team number one.
94
00:03:43,974 --> 00:03:48,270
- Scans indicate there's a Class M planet
at 67857 mark S.
95
00:03:48,270 --> 00:03:50,230
- Yes, sir. Adjusting vector now.
96
00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,232
KORVO: See how his second in command
just did his job
97
00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:53,817
without being
a little bitch about it, Terry.
98
00:03:53,817 --> 00:03:55,527
TERRY: Yeah, because he's a cuck.
KORVO: You're a cuck.
99
00:03:55,527 --> 00:03:56,612
TERRY: And we can sense our own.
100
00:03:56,612 --> 00:03:58,322
- Initiating landing sequence.
101
00:03:58,322 --> 00:03:59,281
[clanging]
102
00:03:59,281 --> 00:04:01,867
♪
103
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:04,870
♪
104
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:08,081
♪
105
00:04:08,081 --> 00:04:10,918
♪
106
00:04:12,211 --> 00:04:13,587
[squawking]
107
00:04:14,213 --> 00:04:15,547
[ship whooshing]
108
00:04:17,591 --> 00:04:18,842
[clanking, steam hissing]
109
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♪
110
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♪
111
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- As your leader, it is my duty
112
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to protect and guide you.
113
00:04:29,394 --> 00:04:31,063
Any of your failings are mine,
114
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and together, we make this sacrifice--
115
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ALL: For the Pupa!
116
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♪ funky music playing ♪
[cheering and laughing]
117
00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:40,113
- Oh!
118
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:43,659
KORVO: Okay, we get it.
119
00:04:43,659 --> 00:04:45,619
That team makes us look like
a bunch of jabronis.
120
00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,120
Yo-yo-you're just rubbing it in, Aisha.
121
00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:49,373
- We could frolic in fields
if we wanted to.
122
00:04:49,373 --> 00:04:50,791
AISHA:
It's not my fault y'all suck.
123
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:52,209
KORVO: Bullshit!
TERRY: We're better than them.
124
00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:54,586
AISHA: Okay, fine! Here's a team
that did worse than you.
125
00:04:57,047 --> 00:04:59,132
[explosion booms]
126
00:04:59,758 --> 00:05:03,095
♪
127
00:05:03,095 --> 00:05:07,182
♪
128
00:05:07,182 --> 00:05:11,103
♪
129
00:05:11,103 --> 00:05:13,939
♪
130
00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:17,901
♪
131
00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:20,612
[clanking, steam hissing]
132
00:05:21,947 --> 00:05:23,490
- This planet looks awesome!
133
00:05:23,490 --> 00:05:26,785
- As your leader, I just want to say
that I am proud of you.
134
00:05:26,785 --> 00:05:28,996
KORVO: What the fuck is this?
I said I wanted a bad one!
135
00:05:28,996 --> 00:05:30,205
AISHA : Just wait for it.
136
00:05:30,205 --> 00:05:32,207
- If you need something,
then I need something.
137
00:05:32,207 --> 00:05:33,876
Because we're all in this together.
138
00:05:33,876 --> 00:05:36,128
Only rule is, if you walk through my door,
139
00:05:36,128 --> 00:05:37,880
you gotta leave your blues outside.
140
00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:38,714
[explosion booms]
141
00:05:38,714 --> 00:05:40,048
[all scream]
142
00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,592
TERRY:
Ha ha, yeah! Get fucked!
143
00:05:41,592 --> 00:05:42,759
[Solar Opposites laughing]
144
00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:45,387
- Nobody fucks with a wave
of superheated gas!
145
00:05:45,387 --> 00:05:47,055
AISHA:
Want to see another one like that?
146
00:05:47,055 --> 00:05:47,973
- Yes! Hit me.
147
00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:51,518
[explosion booms]
148
00:05:51,518 --> 00:05:54,855
♪
149
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:57,191
♪
150
00:05:57,191 --> 00:06:00,319
♪
151
00:06:00,319 --> 00:06:02,654
♪
152
00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:05,032
♪
153
00:06:05,032 --> 00:06:06,617
♪
154
00:06:06,617 --> 00:06:07,743
[clanking, steam hissing]
155
00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:10,329
[fire crackling]
156
00:06:10,329 --> 00:06:12,497
- The Pupa really likes it here.
157
00:06:12,497 --> 00:06:13,999
- All the berries we can eat
158
00:06:13,999 --> 00:06:16,668
and the best team
a Shlorpian could ask for.
159
00:06:16,668 --> 00:06:18,962
KORVO: Look at that planet,
completely untouched by human pollution.
160
00:06:18,962 --> 00:06:20,964
No highways or skyscrapers.
[thudding footsteps]
161
00:06:20,964 --> 00:06:22,841
I wish we'd landed on a planet like that
instead of Earth--
162
00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:24,134
Jesus Christ!
163
00:06:24,593 --> 00:06:26,970
[screaming]
[T-Rex roaring]
164
00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:29,473
[bones crunching]
165
00:06:29,473 --> 00:06:30,641
[Solar Opposites cheering]
166
00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:33,143
TERRY:
Yeah! T-Rex out of nowhere for the win!
167
00:06:33,143 --> 00:06:34,895
KORVO: Okay, that's not exactly
their fault, I guess.
168
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,314
Can we see a team that doesn't get killed
by something on their planet?
169
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:42,486
♪
170
00:06:42,486 --> 00:06:46,448
♪
171
00:06:46,448 --> 00:06:48,200
- Sweet dreams, little Pupa.
172
00:06:48,200 --> 00:06:50,827
- Aww, look, he's terraforming
in his sleep.
173
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:52,454
TERRY: Why are they treating
their Pupa like a baby?
174
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:54,206
I thought it was a pet.
JESSE: He isn't?
175
00:06:54,206 --> 00:06:55,916
Oof, maybe we shouldn't feed him bones
176
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:59,127
or make him shit in a box
of sand anymore, huh, guys?
177
00:06:59,127 --> 00:07:00,420
- Did you turn the heat on?
178
00:07:03,799 --> 00:07:07,177
- Whoa, their sun went nova?
How do we make ours do that?
179
00:07:07,177 --> 00:07:09,596
AISHA: You just have to find an isotope--
- Don't tell him.
180
00:07:09,596 --> 00:07:11,849
- That's three dead teams in a row.
- So?
181
00:07:11,849 --> 00:07:13,517
- Isn't that like totes random?
182
00:07:13,517 --> 00:07:14,893
AISHA:
Space is fucking dangerous.
183
00:07:14,893 --> 00:07:17,479
- Hell yeah, it is.
Tell us about more dead teams!
184
00:07:17,479 --> 00:07:18,647
- But skip the backstories.
185
00:07:18,647 --> 00:07:21,108
I don't wanna get emotionally invested
if they're all going to get Mufasa'd.
186
00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:22,067
AISHA: Okay.
187
00:07:22,067 --> 00:07:24,278
Team five ran into trouble on robot world.
188
00:07:24,278 --> 00:07:26,363
Team six took a dip in a poison ocean.
189
00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:29,783
Teams seven and eight?
Ooh! They fell into chasms.
190
00:07:29,783 --> 00:07:32,452
KORVO: Okay, wow, Jesus, that's grim.
Can we get a palate cleanser?
191
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:33,203
AISHA: Sure.
192
00:07:33,203 --> 00:07:35,706
[whooshing]
193
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:38,333
- I think we just found our new home!
194
00:07:38,333 --> 00:07:39,668
- What are we talking, snow planet?
195
00:07:39,668 --> 00:07:42,880
- Nope, looks like we're going
to be living in a tropical paradise!
196
00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:44,339
[whooping]
- Alright, surf's up!
197
00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:45,382
Setting a course for...
198
00:07:45,382 --> 00:07:46,258
[thudding] Aah!
199
00:07:46,258 --> 00:07:49,469
- What the? We're caught
in some sort of tractor beam.
200
00:07:50,637 --> 00:07:54,766
♪ hard rock music playing ♪
201
00:07:54,766 --> 00:07:57,895
♪
202
00:07:57,895 --> 00:08:00,981
♪
203
00:08:00,981 --> 00:08:01,815
- Is that a cop?
204
00:08:01,815 --> 00:08:04,860
- Listen, we aren't doing anything wrong.
I'll handle it.
205
00:08:06,695 --> 00:08:08,405
Hello. Can I help you, officer?
206
00:08:08,405 --> 00:08:10,741
- We've been getting reports
of Varmints in the system.
207
00:08:10,741 --> 00:08:12,201
You been having any trouble with Varmints?
208
00:08:12,201 --> 00:08:14,953
TEAM 10 LEADER: I don't know
what a Varmint is. Are we in danger?
209
00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:17,998
- Fuzzy insect, about ye wide,
burrow inside your body and control you?
210
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,958
Mind if I do a quick sweep of the ship?
211
00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:21,460
TEAM 10 LEADER:
That would be great, thank you.
212
00:08:22,753 --> 00:08:24,880
- Varmints can squeeze
into all sorts of places.
213
00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,715
Better to be sure
you don't have them now, so--
214
00:08:27,257 --> 00:08:28,342
You're a Shlorpian?
215
00:08:28,342 --> 00:08:31,428
- Oh yeah, me and my whole team here.
Our homeworld was hit by a--
216
00:08:31,428 --> 00:08:32,804
- I need backup, now.
217
00:08:32,804 --> 00:08:34,348
- Let me up right now! Unhand me!
218
00:08:34,348 --> 00:08:35,849
- Lervus? What's happening?
219
00:08:35,849 --> 00:08:37,518
- This is all a misunderstanding--
220
00:08:37,518 --> 00:08:38,519
- What are you doing to my sweetie?
221
00:08:39,311 --> 00:08:41,355
[screaming]
222
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:53,242
- We were just looking
for a new world to call home!
223
00:08:53,242 --> 00:08:55,410
- Yeah, by terraforming innocent planets.
224
00:08:55,410 --> 00:08:57,204
You make me sick.
225
00:08:57,704 --> 00:08:58,497
[door slams]
226
00:09:00,749 --> 00:09:03,919
- Frunking unreal. They really don't see
any problem with what they do.
227
00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:05,170
- This is why I got into being a cop.
228
00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:08,090
To clean dirtbags like this
out of the quadrant.
229
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:09,675
[chuckles]
230
00:09:09,675 --> 00:09:12,135
♪ hard rock music playing ♪
231
00:09:12,135 --> 00:09:13,387
- What the hell was that?
232
00:09:13,387 --> 00:09:16,765
AISHA: Silvercops. Shit,
they're always arresting Shlorpians.
233
00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:18,225
- You can't call dibs on a planet!
234
00:09:18,225 --> 00:09:20,394
Skip past all the teams arrested
by space cops.
235
00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:21,562
I don't want to see that shit.
236
00:09:23,605 --> 00:09:24,857
- Listen up, punks.
237
00:09:24,857 --> 00:09:26,441
We're going to crush this planet,
238
00:09:26,441 --> 00:09:28,902
we're going to protect the Pupa
until it can consume us,
239
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,488
and we're going to work out
the whole time and get huge!
240
00:09:31,488 --> 00:09:34,032
- You know it, brother.
- Pushup race! Go!
241
00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,868
[grunting]
KORVO: Whoa, these guys are yoked.
242
00:09:35,868 --> 00:09:37,369
JESSE:
Even their Pupa's swole.
243
00:09:37,369 --> 00:09:40,831
Look at him, he looks like
he's gonna kick over a nerd's sand castle.
244
00:09:40,831 --> 00:09:42,833
[roaring] [screaming]
245
00:09:43,834 --> 00:09:45,043
TERRY:
Wait a second, hold on.
246
00:09:45,043 --> 00:09:47,754
That other team earlier
already got eaten by a T-Rex.
247
00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:50,048
AISHA: So?
- So, it's like, a double beat.
248
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,134
AISHA: It's what happened.
- Eh, just seems hacky.
249
00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:53,594
You could have spread them out
more in the story.
250
00:09:53,594 --> 00:09:55,262
AISHA:
It happens too often to spread out.
251
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,431
- What? How many planets
even have T-Rexes?
252
00:09:57,431 --> 00:09:58,974
AISHA:
Let's take a look!
253
00:10:00,767 --> 00:10:05,647
♪ In the arms of the angel ♪
254
00:10:06,231 --> 00:10:11,403
♪ Fly away from here ♪
255
00:10:12,321 --> 00:10:17,701
♪ From this dark, cold hotel room ♪
256
00:10:18,619 --> 00:10:24,082
♪ And the endlessness that you feel ♪
257
00:10:24,791 --> 00:10:29,838
♪ You are pulled from the wreckage ♪
258
00:10:29,838 --> 00:10:31,507
- [Italian accent]
I-- I'm so sorry!
259
00:10:31,507 --> 00:10:34,593
This is all-a my fault!
We never should-a have come here!
260
00:10:36,887 --> 00:10:39,389
♪ You're in the arms ♪
261
00:10:39,389 --> 00:10:42,809
♪ Of the angel ♪
262
00:10:43,393 --> 00:10:48,398
♪ May you find ♪
263
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:52,402
♪ Some comfort here ♪
264
00:10:52,402 --> 00:10:55,405
♪
265
00:10:55,405 --> 00:10:58,408
♪ You're in the arms ♪
266
00:10:58,408 --> 00:11:01,411
♪ Of the angel ♪
267
00:11:01,411 --> 00:11:06,416
♪ May you find ♪
268
00:11:06,834 --> 00:11:10,587
♪ Some comfort here ♪
269
00:11:10,587 --> 00:11:13,966
♪
270
00:11:13,966 --> 00:11:17,636
♪
271
00:11:19,221 --> 00:11:21,557
- Forty-two teams got eaten by T-Rexes?
272
00:11:21,557 --> 00:11:23,684
AISHA: What? They're one of
the strongest dinosaurs.
273
00:11:23,684 --> 00:11:24,810
- That's almost half of us!
274
00:11:24,810 --> 00:11:27,104
AISHA: It's weird that they're carnivores
and you're plants,
275
00:11:27,104 --> 00:11:28,605
so they're not even getting nutrition,
276
00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:29,815
they're just being dicks.
277
00:11:29,815 --> 00:11:33,193
- Are there teams more like us
that aren't fighting dinosaurs?
278
00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:35,320
AISHA: [clears throat]
Well, team 63 has been
279
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:38,073
on an already inhabited planet
for six months.
280
00:11:38,824 --> 00:11:40,450
- Okay everyone, no fun today.
281
00:11:40,450 --> 00:11:42,703
All we're going to do is read manuals
and repair the ship
282
00:11:42,703 --> 00:11:45,330
so we can get off this shitty planet
and find an empty one.
283
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:46,123
[all groan]
284
00:11:46,123 --> 00:11:48,166
- Shut the fuck up
or I'll zap you with the death ray!
285
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:48,959
KORVO: I like this guy.
286
00:11:48,959 --> 00:11:52,045
- Captain Zarg threatening us
with the death ray.
287
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:53,255
What a surprise.
288
00:11:53,255 --> 00:11:56,008
- I can't ship repair today.
I need to find a date for prom.
289
00:11:56,008 --> 00:11:58,302
- Nobody's going to ask you to the prom,
you're an alien!
290
00:11:58,302 --> 00:11:59,761
- Hey, to us, they're the aliens.
291
00:11:59,761 --> 00:12:02,181
[squawks]
[all screaming]
292
00:12:05,517 --> 00:12:08,478
- Hey! A giant bird is basically a T-Rex!
293
00:12:08,478 --> 00:12:09,855
AISHA:
You're basically a little bitch.
294
00:12:09,855 --> 00:12:10,772
- Yumyulack's right,
295
00:12:10,772 --> 00:12:12,983
but it was also a good example
of why we need to get along.
296
00:12:12,983 --> 00:12:14,193
- No more petty arguments would help.
297
00:12:14,193 --> 00:12:16,653
- Maybe we wouldn't argue
if Jesse didn't sleep in all day.
298
00:12:16,653 --> 00:12:18,739
- I need my rest or I get puffy!
299
00:12:18,739 --> 00:12:19,448
AISHA: Shut up.
300
00:12:19,448 --> 00:12:23,285
Korvo's right, you have to get along,
or it can go bad real fast.
301
00:12:24,953 --> 00:12:27,414
- Five straight months of space rain.
302
00:12:27,414 --> 00:12:29,124
I'm glad we thought to bring board games,
303
00:12:29,124 --> 00:12:30,334
or we'd have gone crazy.
304
00:12:30,334 --> 00:12:31,001
[rattling]
305
00:12:34,129 --> 00:12:35,422
- Hey! You cheated!
306
00:12:35,422 --> 00:12:37,341
- I'm team leader,
I can make my own rules!
307
00:12:37,341 --> 00:12:38,467
- You piece of shit!
308
00:12:38,467 --> 00:12:39,635
[both grunting]
309
00:12:39,635 --> 00:12:41,553
- Shit! Look out for that space probe!
310
00:12:41,553 --> 00:12:43,055
[screaming]
Oh no, no, no, no!
311
00:12:43,055 --> 00:12:43,847
[all groan]
312
00:12:46,475 --> 00:12:48,435
- Holy shit, that was close!
313
00:12:48,435 --> 00:12:49,311
[groans]
314
00:12:49,311 --> 00:12:51,146
- Damn! That was the Voyager 1 probe!
315
00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:52,606
NASA launched it in the '70s.
316
00:12:52,606 --> 00:12:54,274
I learned about it from a Sesame Street.
317
00:12:54,274 --> 00:12:56,318
- Well, who cares,
we're not going to get hit by a probe.
318
00:12:56,318 --> 00:12:57,653
What about something closer to home?
319
00:12:57,653 --> 00:13:00,030
AISHA:
Team 65 landed on a beaver planet.
320
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:02,324
♪
321
00:13:02,324 --> 00:13:04,368
♪
322
00:13:04,993 --> 00:13:07,120
- Stop fidgeting.
- I can't help it.
323
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,373
All this beaver fur is making me itchy.
324
00:13:09,373 --> 00:13:11,500
Who ate my last jar of narbo nuts?
325
00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:14,503
- Ech, nobody.
Those things taste like sploof.
326
00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:15,963
- Well, someone ate them,
because they're gone.
327
00:13:15,963 --> 00:13:18,173
- You just lost them.
- I did not!
328
00:13:18,173 --> 00:13:21,969
Since nobody respects my stuff,
I guess I can just ruin the dam!
329
00:13:21,969 --> 00:13:24,137
- Trildo, stop it!
You're scaring the beavers!
330
00:13:24,137 --> 00:13:25,681
- You stole my narbos!
331
00:13:25,681 --> 00:13:27,558
I hate it here, and I hate you!
332
00:13:27,558 --> 00:13:30,060
- If you don't shut the fuck up
about the narbos,
333
00:13:30,060 --> 00:13:32,688
I'm going to use the doomsday device,
I swear to god!
334
00:13:32,688 --> 00:13:34,898
- Narbos! Narbos! You ate my narbos!
335
00:13:34,898 --> 00:13:38,151
You ate my narbos! Narbos!
Narbos! Narbos! Nar--
336
00:13:38,151 --> 00:13:40,153
[explosion booms]
337
00:13:41,530 --> 00:13:43,615
- Yeah, but did he eat the narbos?
338
00:13:43,615 --> 00:13:45,701
AISHA: Nope. They were just way back
in the cupboard.
339
00:13:45,701 --> 00:13:47,452
- Well, looks like every team has a Terry.
340
00:13:47,452 --> 00:13:49,955
With all the dumb shit you pull,
it's a miracle we haven't been killed.
341
00:13:49,955 --> 00:13:52,624
I should just wrap you in plastic for
the rest of the mission, like an old ham.
342
00:13:52,624 --> 00:13:54,751
- It's not always
the Pupa expert fucking up.
343
00:13:54,751 --> 00:13:56,879
I bet the replicants do it too.
Look at 'em. Fuck-ups.
344
00:13:56,879 --> 00:13:58,881
- Better keep my name
out of your mouth, bitch.
345
00:13:58,881 --> 00:14:01,383
Us replicants never cause any shit.
346
00:14:01,383 --> 00:14:03,135
AISHA:
That's not exactly true.
347
00:14:04,136 --> 00:14:06,847
- Nothing beats ending a full day
of scraping nutrients
348
00:14:06,847 --> 00:14:09,641
off of giant seashells
like curling up by the fire
349
00:14:09,641 --> 00:14:11,101
with a dense manual.
350
00:14:11,101 --> 00:14:14,521
- This sucks. I hate this planet
and wish I'd never been replicated.
351
00:14:15,606 --> 00:14:16,982
[loud TV playing]
352
00:14:16,982 --> 00:14:19,568
- Too loud, Melbo. Turn it down.
- We just want to relax.
353
00:14:19,568 --> 00:14:21,528
- Oh, so the way I relax
isn't good enough for you?
354
00:14:21,528 --> 00:14:23,739
- You don't have to make everything
into a big deal.
355
00:14:23,739 --> 00:14:25,032
Give me the remote.
- No!
356
00:14:25,032 --> 00:14:25,908
- Give me the remote.
- Hey!
357
00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:27,367
- No!
- Stop that!
358
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:28,368
[all groan]
359
00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:29,828
- Nooo!
360
00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:32,706
JESSE: Okay, so one replicant
accidentally killed their team,
361
00:14:32,706 --> 00:14:33,665
no big deal.
362
00:14:33,665 --> 00:14:35,209
REPLICANTS: Die! Die! Die!
363
00:14:35,209 --> 00:14:36,335
Die! Die!
364
00:14:36,335 --> 00:14:39,213
Die! Die! Die! Die! Die!
365
00:14:40,964 --> 00:14:44,301
[moaning]
366
00:14:45,761 --> 00:14:47,429
- I got nothing.
- That was fucked.
367
00:14:47,429 --> 00:14:49,264
AISHA:
They were the only ones who did that.
368
00:14:49,264 --> 00:14:51,934
- Good. Because we would never
kill you guys then make out.
369
00:14:51,934 --> 00:14:52,976
- Sure wouldn't.
370
00:14:53,727 --> 00:14:55,771
- Clearly, the mission relies
on mutual respect.
371
00:14:55,771 --> 00:14:57,564
- But we don't respect each other at all.
372
00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:59,733
Does that mean that we're one
of the shitty teams?
373
00:14:59,733 --> 00:15:00,651
- No way, we're the best!
374
00:15:00,651 --> 00:15:03,654
- I don't know, team one still seems
like the best so far.
375
00:15:03,654 --> 00:15:04,655
- Nah, I want to see them again.
376
00:15:04,655 --> 00:15:06,532
Those fuck-ups have
to be T-Rex shit by now.
377
00:15:06,532 --> 00:15:08,909
AISHA: Actually, team one
is keeping it together.
378
00:15:10,577 --> 00:15:12,704
KORVO: What the hell, look at their
little compound they've made!
379
00:15:12,704 --> 00:15:16,250
♪
380
00:15:16,250 --> 00:15:20,003
♪
381
00:15:20,003 --> 00:15:23,465
♪
382
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:25,509
- Did everyone do their jobs today?
383
00:15:25,509 --> 00:15:26,844
- Yes, sir!
- You know it!
384
00:15:26,844 --> 00:15:28,095
- Yes, sir!
385
00:15:28,095 --> 00:15:29,805
TERRY: Ugh, they're so considerate
and productive.
386
00:15:29,805 --> 00:15:31,640
YUMYULACK:
Look at their Pupa! It's beautiful!
387
00:15:31,640 --> 00:15:33,600
JESSE: [gasps]
It's like bubblegum colored!
388
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:34,726
Why doesn't our Pupa look like that?
389
00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:36,103
TERRY:
I don't know! Get off my back!
390
00:15:36,103 --> 00:15:37,729
- So maybe we aren't as good as team one,
391
00:15:37,729 --> 00:15:39,106
but I bet none of them spent
a month learning
392
00:15:39,106 --> 00:15:40,566
how to do this sweet-ass TikTok dance!
393
00:15:40,566 --> 00:15:42,609
♪ club music playing ♪
394
00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:44,945
♪
395
00:15:44,945 --> 00:15:48,031
♪
396
00:15:48,031 --> 00:15:49,992
AISHA: Sure, but there are
other teams out there
397
00:15:49,992 --> 00:15:52,119
who have accomplished
the same amount of missions that you have.
398
00:15:52,119 --> 00:15:53,495
- You mean other cool teams?
399
00:15:53,495 --> 00:15:55,581
AISHA:
Mmm, more like trashy-ass teams.
400
00:15:55,581 --> 00:15:56,582
- We aren't trashy!
401
00:15:56,582 --> 00:15:58,667
- Show me these teams that are "like us."
402
00:16:00,836 --> 00:16:02,838
- Aw yeah, boyyyy!
403
00:16:02,838 --> 00:16:05,299
Who wants to eat meat and watch screens?
404
00:16:05,299 --> 00:16:06,800
- Me, me, me, me, me.
- Yeah, me.
405
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:08,427
- That's what I'm talkin' about.
406
00:16:08,427 --> 00:16:11,513
- After we fuck around all day,
let's pull pranks on our neighbors!
407
00:16:11,513 --> 00:16:12,681
[all cheering]
408
00:16:12,681 --> 00:16:14,016
KORVO: These guys are sort of
like the version of us
409
00:16:14,016 --> 00:16:15,267
you'd get at the dollar store.
410
00:16:15,267 --> 00:16:18,228
- Aw, fuck. Why are we acting
so trashy, dudes?
411
00:16:18,228 --> 00:16:20,981
We have a mission! My head! It hurts!
412
00:16:20,981 --> 00:16:23,233
- Mine does too!
Why are we obsessed with screens?
413
00:16:23,233 --> 00:16:25,527
We're supposed to be taking care
of the Pupa.
414
00:16:25,527 --> 00:16:28,113
[screaming]
415
00:16:28,113 --> 00:16:29,281
- Oh no, Varmints!
416
00:16:29,281 --> 00:16:30,073
[screeches]
417
00:16:32,159 --> 00:16:33,702
[screams]
KORVO: What the fuck?
418
00:16:33,702 --> 00:16:35,329
The only reason they were acting
like us is because
419
00:16:35,329 --> 00:16:37,080
there were fuzzy insects in their brains?
420
00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:38,874
AISHA: Wait, you don't have those too?
- No!
421
00:16:38,874 --> 00:16:42,002
AISHA: I guess you're just regular trashy,
not fuzzy insect trashy.
422
00:16:42,002 --> 00:16:43,128
JESSE and YUMYULACK: Yeah.
- That's bad!
423
00:16:43,128 --> 00:16:46,715
Show us another team that's like us,
who aren't being eaten from the inside.
424
00:16:47,716 --> 00:16:48,926
- This is our planet,
425
00:16:48,926 --> 00:16:51,595
and we're going to raise our pupa
to terraform it.
426
00:16:51,595 --> 00:16:53,430
- No way. We landed here first.
427
00:16:53,430 --> 00:16:55,307
Our Pupa is going to be doing
the terraforming.
428
00:16:55,307 --> 00:16:56,934
- Let me introduce you to my friends.
429
00:16:56,934 --> 00:16:58,977
"Not" and "today," son.
430
00:16:58,977 --> 00:17:00,395
- Suck my mound!
431
00:17:00,395 --> 00:17:02,731
[all yell]
432
00:17:03,232 --> 00:17:04,399
[whirring]
433
00:17:08,403 --> 00:17:09,029
- Aah!
434
00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:10,948
- Gimme that.
435
00:17:10,948 --> 00:17:14,701
[grunting]
436
00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:19,373
- Yes, the mission is important,
but so is having fun.
437
00:17:19,373 --> 00:17:20,666
It's all about balance.
438
00:17:20,666 --> 00:17:23,252
We can't just hyper focus
on the safety of the Pupa
439
00:17:23,252 --> 00:17:24,628
every waking second of the day.
440
00:17:24,628 --> 00:17:26,088
We have to have a little fun.
441
00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,507
Let's dance!
442
00:17:28,507 --> 00:17:29,591
♪ dance music playing ♪
443
00:17:29,591 --> 00:17:31,009
[Pupa squishes]
[all scream]
444
00:17:31,009 --> 00:17:32,845
- See, Terry? You have
to take your job more seriously.
445
00:17:32,845 --> 00:17:34,429
- Oh please, that would
never happen to me,
446
00:17:34,429 --> 00:17:35,264
that guy was an idiot.
447
00:17:35,264 --> 00:17:36,807
ALL:
Terry watch out! Stop! The TV!
448
00:17:36,807 --> 00:17:37,641
- The huh now?
[gasps]
449
00:17:39,476 --> 00:17:41,770
- Fucking idiot, we've been watching
Pupas die all day!
450
00:17:41,770 --> 00:17:44,565
This was supposed to make me feel better
about how behind we are in the mission.
451
00:17:44,565 --> 00:17:47,109
- How many teams are even alive, Aisha?
452
00:17:47,109 --> 00:17:47,860
AISHA: Not many.
453
00:17:47,860 --> 00:17:49,278
Some were eaten by reavers.
454
00:17:49,278 --> 00:17:51,405
A bunch got cooked by radiation.
455
00:17:51,405 --> 00:17:54,283
One team got killed
by DC Comics' Superman.
456
00:17:54,283 --> 00:17:56,076
Can't show that one for legal reasons.
457
00:17:56,076 --> 00:17:58,787
There isn't a lot to tell
for the last dozen.
458
00:17:59,580 --> 00:18:01,415
They technically survived the journey,
459
00:18:01,415 --> 00:18:03,000
just never found a planet,
460
00:18:03,000 --> 00:18:04,751
ran out of oxygen and water,
461
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,420
their bodies entombed in their ships,
462
00:18:06,420 --> 00:18:09,548
coasting forever into the infinite void.
463
00:18:10,632 --> 00:18:13,177
- Ninety-nine?
That means we're the last team left?
464
00:18:13,177 --> 00:18:14,803
- Holy ass-shitting fuck, it does!
465
00:18:14,803 --> 00:18:17,472
- And we're always doing
stupid dangerous things!
466
00:18:17,472 --> 00:18:20,225
- We're so fucked! We're the last team,
and we're total fuck-ups!
467
00:18:20,225 --> 00:18:21,852
- We're dog shit!
468
00:18:21,852 --> 00:18:25,063
[all crying]
469
00:18:31,028 --> 00:18:33,697
[all crying]
470
00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:35,449
- Wait! What about team one?
471
00:18:35,449 --> 00:18:37,159
- Oh. Oh, right. They didn't die!
472
00:18:37,159 --> 00:18:38,619
Aisha, show us team one! Quick!
473
00:18:39,620 --> 00:18:41,705
♪ Aboo deebo ♪
474
00:18:41,705 --> 00:18:43,707
♪ Daboo weebo ♪
475
00:18:43,707 --> 00:18:45,751
♪ Daboo daboo ♪
476
00:18:45,751 --> 00:18:47,002
♪ Aboo daboo ♪
477
00:18:47,002 --> 00:18:48,253
KORVO:
Oh, thank god these dorks are alive.
478
00:18:48,253 --> 00:18:49,463
JESSE: What are they doing?
479
00:18:49,463 --> 00:18:50,339
TERRY: Wait, wait, I know this!
480
00:18:50,339 --> 00:18:52,341
This is what you do
when the Pupa is ready to terraform!
481
00:18:52,341 --> 00:18:54,843
KORVO: You're right! Look, their Pupa
has reached its final color!
482
00:18:54,843 --> 00:18:56,929
- That's it, little guy. You've got this.
483
00:18:56,929 --> 00:18:58,931
Come on. Come on.
[Pupa straining]
484
00:18:58,931 --> 00:19:02,476
Oh! It's happening!
He's evolving to his true form!
485
00:19:02,476 --> 00:19:03,977
[thunder rumbling]
486
00:19:06,980 --> 00:19:09,358
- It has been an honor
to serve with you all.
487
00:19:09,358 --> 00:19:10,025
- Ahh!
488
00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:14,404
[cheering, whooping]
489
00:19:14,404 --> 00:19:17,616
[groaning, screaming]
490
00:19:17,616 --> 00:19:18,909
KORVO:
This is fucking awesome.
491
00:19:19,910 --> 00:19:23,914
♪ dramatic music playing ♪
492
00:19:23,914 --> 00:19:28,752
♪
493
00:19:28,752 --> 00:19:31,255
♪
494
00:19:31,255 --> 00:19:33,382
♪
495
00:19:33,382 --> 00:19:36,134
♪
496
00:19:36,134 --> 00:19:38,303
[explosions booming]
497
00:19:38,303 --> 00:19:41,849
♪
498
00:19:41,849 --> 00:19:44,142
♪
499
00:19:44,142 --> 00:19:47,396
TERRY: Yeah! He did it!
He terraformed the whole planet! Yeah!
500
00:19:47,396 --> 00:19:49,273
JESSE: Alright!
They did it!
501
00:19:49,273 --> 00:19:50,732
YUMYULACK:
Oh, I can't believe it!
502
00:19:51,275 --> 00:19:55,112
♪
503
00:19:55,112 --> 00:19:58,323
♪
504
00:19:58,323 --> 00:20:00,492
♪
505
00:20:01,326 --> 00:20:02,744
KORVO:
A new homeworld! A whole new--
506
00:20:03,579 --> 00:20:05,581
Wait a minute,
we're moving forward in time?
507
00:20:08,959 --> 00:20:11,211
Huh. It looks exactly like the homeworld.
508
00:20:11,211 --> 00:20:13,463
JESSE:
Uh, yeah, that's what a copy is, dude.
509
00:20:13,463 --> 00:20:16,341
KORVO: No, not the image of the homeworld,
this is exactly the homeworld.
510
00:20:16,341 --> 00:20:17,259
Look, there's me!
511
00:20:17,259 --> 00:20:20,596
I remember this, I'm buying darvo fruit
from that vendor on Glurk Street.
512
00:20:20,596 --> 00:20:21,638
He always ripped me off.
513
00:20:21,638 --> 00:20:22,681
TERRY:
Hey, there's me too!
514
00:20:22,681 --> 00:20:24,391
Yeah, I went through a yo-yo phase.
515
00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:26,435
That's a Grak 5000.
- Ah!
516
00:20:26,435 --> 00:20:29,396
Wait, when Pupa remakes the homeworld,
it'll remake us too?
517
00:20:29,396 --> 00:20:30,814
AISHA: No, that's you.
518
00:20:30,814 --> 00:20:33,775
- How can we be here on Earth
and on New Shlorp at the same time?
519
00:20:33,775 --> 00:20:36,695
AISHA: You're not.
That's not new Shlorp, it's Shlorp.
520
00:20:36,695 --> 00:20:39,072
SOLAR OPPOSITES: What?
AISHA: This all happened 30 years ago.
521
00:20:39,072 --> 00:20:40,699
- Wait, you mean all those teams
you showed us--
522
00:20:40,699 --> 00:20:44,328
AISHA: They were from the Shlorp that
exploded before your Shlorp was made.
523
00:20:44,328 --> 00:20:47,080
- So team one's Shlorp got hit
by an asteroid, so they made our Shlorp,
524
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:48,624
and then it got hit by an asteroid too?
525
00:20:48,624 --> 00:20:50,876
AISHA: I just said that.
- Okay, pretend I'm stupid.
526
00:20:50,876 --> 00:20:52,961
How many Planet Shlorps
have there been? Ever.
527
00:20:52,961 --> 00:20:54,171
AISHA: Thousands.
528
00:20:56,089 --> 00:20:59,968
[explosions boom]
529
00:21:09,353 --> 00:21:12,314
Shlorpians are always getting
their homeworlds destroyed
530
00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:13,941
and spreading across the galaxy.
531
00:21:13,941 --> 00:21:15,692
That's kinda your whole thing.
532
00:21:15,692 --> 00:21:18,237
- So every time a Shlorp is destroyed,
we send out a hundred teams
533
00:21:18,237 --> 00:21:19,363
and make a hundred new ones?
534
00:21:19,363 --> 00:21:21,698
AISHA:
Pretty fucking exponential, right?
535
00:21:22,491 --> 00:21:24,910
YUMYULACK: We really are spreading
across the galaxy like mold.
536
00:21:24,910 --> 00:21:27,454
That's so metal!
No wonder the Silvercops hate us!
537
00:21:27,454 --> 00:21:29,957
- How many teams are out there
right now this second?
538
00:21:29,957 --> 00:21:32,125
AISHA: I don't know, I only have
the records for the last set.
539
00:21:32,125 --> 00:21:35,170
- So we have no idea
if we're the last team or not?
540
00:21:35,170 --> 00:21:35,921
- Damnit, Aisha!
541
00:21:35,921 --> 00:21:37,631
You made us sit
through all these stupid stories,
542
00:21:37,631 --> 00:21:39,424
and now we don't even know
if there are any living teams!
543
00:21:39,424 --> 00:21:40,717
What a waste of time this has been!
544
00:21:40,717 --> 00:21:42,344
AISHA:
You're the one that wanted stories.
545
00:21:42,344 --> 00:21:45,138
Get the fuck out of here
so I can browse Raya in peace!
546
00:21:45,931 --> 00:21:46,640
Mmm!
547
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:48,767
- How'd she get on Raya?
Isn't that for celebrities?
548
00:21:48,767 --> 00:21:51,144
- She fucked Ayan-Ray Eynolds-Ray.
- Oh!
549
00:21:51,144 --> 00:21:52,938
♪
550
00:21:53,689 --> 00:21:55,858
- I swear one of these days
I'm going erase that AI.
551
00:21:55,858 --> 00:21:57,943
- Well, I think we learned
a valuable lesson today.
552
00:21:57,943 --> 00:21:59,361
- Like what?
- We might be redundant,
553
00:21:59,361 --> 00:22:00,863
or we might be Shlorp's only hope.
554
00:22:00,863 --> 00:22:02,990
Either way, we need
to appreciate each other.
555
00:22:02,990 --> 00:22:04,032
- We already knew that!
556
00:22:04,032 --> 00:22:06,660
Ugh, today was as worthless
as an orange Starburst.
557
00:22:06,660 --> 00:22:08,120
We could have been patching--
- Look out for the speaker!
558
00:22:08,120 --> 00:22:08,912
[creaking]
559
00:22:08,912 --> 00:22:10,205
[thud]
- Ah! [grunting]
560
00:22:10,205 --> 00:22:12,165
- Holy shit, we did learn something!
561
00:22:12,165 --> 00:22:15,460
- See? All those disconnected
violent stories were worth it.
562
00:22:15,460 --> 00:22:17,212
- Told ya! Now let's go play by the chasm!
563
00:22:17,212 --> 00:22:19,047
- Ooh, can we, Korvo? Please?
564
00:22:19,047 --> 00:22:20,716
- Okay, just a bit before dinner.
565
00:22:20,716 --> 00:22:22,759
- I want to horse around
right on the edge of the cliff.
566
00:22:22,759 --> 00:22:24,761
- We can all horse around
right on the edge of the cliff.
567
00:22:24,761 --> 00:22:26,763
As a team.
[all cheering, whooping]
568
00:22:26,763 --> 00:22:28,432
[chanting]
Chasm! Chasm!
569
00:22:28,432 --> 00:22:30,642
Chasm! Chasm!
570
00:22:30,642 --> 00:22:33,937
♪
571
00:22:33,937 --> 00:22:37,608
♪
572
00:22:37,608 --> 00:22:41,320
♪
573
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:46,325
♪
574
00:23:24,863 --> 00:23:26,365
[mimicking laser fire]
43417
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