All language subtitles for Divorce.S02E05.WEBRip.x264-ION10

FRANCES DUFRESNE:
All these human beings...

being rejected in a matter
of seconds.

You're really milking
all the fun out of this.

This is for you, unless it turns
out to have any value.

-Then I'd like it back.

-Sylvia MacDonald.
-I'm trying to find her.

You know, maybe she has
some other work.

SYLVIA MACDONALD:
I keep painting them

and every day I keep realizing
they're shit.

Finish a painting.
For both of us.

Grandpa's in the hospital.

Doctors have recommended
that I get there

as quickly as possible.

Just dealing with my sister
alone is gonna be a ground war.

If I ever hear that you
have upset him,

I will hunt you down.

You're divorced now.
You're free.

I was married forever.
These feelings are...

They're involuntary.

Can you believe it?

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

- Lila is 13.
- Mm.

I mean, it's your
first family gathering
since the divorce.

- How are you two
getting along?
- Very well, thank you.

We're, um, splitting
birthday duties
very amicably.

Robert is doing
the skating and the invites,

and I'm doing the balloons,
the party favors,
and the cake.

- The soft goods.
- Well, that's nice.

You know, ever since
we slept together in Ohio,

things are
uncomplicated.

- Mm-hmm.

- I detect skepticism.
- Not at all.

Sex that makes things
less complicated,

I hear
about that a lot.

I'm telling you
the truth.

Sleeping with Robert
was the antidote.

Maybe I should try that
as a new couples therapy
technique.

- Mm!
- "The Ohio Method."

- Nice.
- All right,
so what is it gonna be,

this lovely
chocolate buttercream,
carrot cake...?

Okay, truthfully,
Lila likes red velvet.

I like free cake.

Oh, that's cute.

Just email us a picture,
and we'll do the rest.

Ah, yeah.

That might be
a bit challenging

to find a photograph
of Lila smiling,

but it would
be sweet.

Or would she say
that it's cringey?

- It's difficult.
Lots of dynamics.
- Hmm.

Maybe you should
have sex with it

to make it
less complicated.

I apologize.

I will email you
a photograph.

- Bye.
- ( train horn
blaring in distance )

Tom?

Pull over!
Good.

Come on.

- Driving.

Yeah, no,
I can see that.

I can also see
there's no adult with you.

- It's Caleb's.

Caleb, your--
your chem partner?

Well, obviously not Caleb.
It's his dad's.

- No, different--

- it's a different--
a new Caleb.
- Tom, Tom.

You should talk
to Dad.

You follow me, at, like,
10 miles an hour.

( music playing
over speakers )

- Oh, shit, hang on.

- Sorry.

Turn that shit
up, man.

- Up!

- Okay.

Are you into Yes?

What do you think,

I just got here
off a melon truck?

I kissed Jon Anderson once
at Madison Square Garden.

I kissed the lips
that kissed the lips
of Jon Anderson?

Let me taste the magic.

- Mm!

- Is this going on
the birthday mix?

Uh, yes.
Lila can't stand

the top 40 horse shit
they play at the ice rink,

and she's
way into this.

When she was six,
she asked for

"Dark Side of The Moon"
from Santa Claus.

- That's so cool.
- Yeah, I mean, granted,

I've been blasting this at her
since she was in the womb,

- but she's come
around to it on her own.

- That's awesome.

Hey! Not much!
So Mom is outside.

She wants
to talk to you.

I got busted
for driving the Tesla.

!
- Stop!

What do you--
what the f--

what do you mean
you were driving the Tesla?

Oh, God,
that was my fault.

He asked me for the keys
because he said his backpack
was in the back,

- and I gave him--
- That's not your fault,
that's your fucking fault.

I just took it out
of the parking for,
like, one second--

Oh, God,
just cut the bullshit,
sit down right now!

- Oh, my God.
- I'm so sorry.

- I'm just gonna go talk--
- No. No.

You can't meet her
under these circumstances.

That's the worst.

Frances:
Hey! Hey!

I pulled our son over
on Jay Street

by himself,

- driving... that.
- I know.

He was just supposed to
grab his backpack.

And he's in
big trouble now, okay?

I mean,
he's grounded here,

and if you want--
it's your house--

ground-- full-on
double ground.

Yeah, he's
definitely grounded,
definitely.

But how do you
have a Tesla?

I don't.

Um, that is
actually not mine.

It's my...
friend-woman's.

- Yes.

You mean girlfriend?

Yes.

Your girlfriend
has a Tesla?

- She does.
- And you...

- I do.

Does this person
have a name?

Jackie.

- Jackie.

Her name's Jackie.

Our children
have met her?

Well, she has
a daughter

who's approximately
the same age as Tom,

- and they go
to the same school.
- Robert, Robert, Robert!

We-- we have rules.

- No, we don't.
- Okay, fine, we don't
have rules,

but common sense says

you don't
introduce our children

to, like, every
random woman you meet.

She's not
a random woman.

No?

How long
have you known her?

Let me see.

February.

A month.

A month?

So four--
four weeks.

31 days,

depending upon
the month.

'Kay, we've established
the Jackie timeline.

- I'm gonna--
- Okay, you know, that is--

that's silly-fast,
Robert.

Seriously,
it's silly-fast.

Diane:
Thank you all
for coming.

Gather around here.

What makes
Eliot Pelts a master

is his use
of juxtaposition.

Kitsch
and high culture,

religion
and eroticism,

weightlessness
and mass

are just some
of the apparent opposites

that challenge us
in Pelts's work.

I just love it,

which is why I am
the unofficial docent

of "Sky Range 4."

Diane:
Right over there.

- Yeah, sure.

Diane, do you know
what I'm gonna do?

I am gonna
hang two paintings
in the bathroom.

- Mm-hmm, I am,
because you know what,

these people,
they come in here,

they don't really look
at anything on the walls.

They take selfies
in front of you-know-what,

they eat cookies,
and then do stuff
in my bathroom.

So they might as well shop
while they're in there.

Frances,
having a bathroom
that people love to use

is one of the first steps
to having

a multimillion-dollar
business.

I mean,
look at Starbucks!

Ooh, any luck
with the Jackal?

Stop calling her the Jackal.
You make her sound
like a drug lord.

Ugh, if we can't
make up a mean name about
your ex's new girlfriend,

then what's
the point of anything?

Well, I appreciate
your point,

but for now,
if he's happy,
I'm happy.

Oh, my God,
look at this table.

Yuck.

It's just such a cliché.
Men really can't be alone.

Nick proposed to me after
being separated from Carolyn
for barely six months.

It was so pathetic.

Of course, I said yes,
but still, so pathetic.

Look, I could be
with Andrew, you know?

I mean, he texts me
and, you know,

but it's just--
it's not what I'm
looking for right now.

Are you sure?
He's so cute.

No, I'm sure the only person
I am looking for right now
is Sylvia,

- and she won't
return my calls.
- Hmm, playing hard to get.

See, now that's
not pathetic.

So what do you think about
your dad and my mom fucking?

Oh! I, um--

- I hadn't
thought about it.

You're cute.

What are you
doing now?

I don't know.
Where are you going?

Hmm, somewhere
more fun than this.

Well, here you are!

Nick, this is
Jackie Giannopoulos.

- Hi.
- Welcome, Jackie.

Robert has told me
nothing about you

other than you like
pizza capricciosa.

If it has carbs,
I eat it.

A woman after
my own large intestine.

Come on in.

Robert built
my new pizza oven
with his manly hands,

so I thought
he should be here
for the trial run

so I have somebody to blame,
you know, if the pizza sucks.

- Diane, our guests are here!

- Robert!

Good. Diane, this is
Jackie Giannopoulos.

- I have heard
so much about you.

That's so interesting
'cause I--

I've heard nothing
about you.

I didn't even--
honey, you didn't tell me

that Robert was gonna be
our dinner guest tonight,

or that he was bringing
the Jack-- Jackie.

- I left
a message on your cell.
- Oh, for God sakes,

I haven't listened
to that thing in two years.

- Well, good!
Well, here,

can you put these
in water for me, darling?

And why don't you two
come on in?

Make yourselves
comfortable!

We can have
a little cocktail.

I need to pull my dough.
I'll be in in a minute.

So, I love your style.
You're very chic.

Thank you.
I love your lighting.

- It's very forgiving.
- Well, anyone over
the age of 12

needs to understand
the importance of a dimmer.

- Mm-hmm.
- You know, right after
Jackie bought my house,

she went around
and she took

all the good, clear bulbs
out of the fixtures

and she started
putting in these weird,

like, cloudy...

- Frosted opaque.
- ...bulbs.

Yeah, I couldn't see
my hand in front of
my face, Diane.

- I walked into a wall!
- I thought that's because
you were so taken with me.

Robert:
All right it was.

And I also
taught him the importance

of a well-placed candle,
haven't I, Robbie?

- Yeah.

I hate it,
but I'm going with it
because she's so fucking hot.

Wine!
I think
you need wine!

Diane, could I get
a Moscow mule?

A Moscow mule
for Robbie

- and wine for the Jackie.
- Thank you.

Knock, knock.
Jeez!

Do you have
a physical ailment
that prevents you from smiling?

Just need one,
sweet picture

for the cake, okay?
You ready?

Knock, knock.
Who's there?

Not your parents
'cause they don't knock.

That's so dumb.

Oh, my God!

So gorgeous!
Look that at that
almost-13-year-old.

Sorry,
hold on a second.

Hello?
No, no, no, no!
Wait, wait!

Sorry.
- Diane: She's here!

- The Jackal is here.

- In my house.

Robert brought her
to dinner.

Oh, my God,
I can't breathe.

Well, that's like...

that's trespassing.

- Well, it's hostile.

That's a hostile
takeover of my friends.

- I don't know, show off,
I guess.

But honestly,
I wouldn't worry about it.

I mean, she's not you,
trust me.

What is she like?
Like--

what are they--
what are they like?

I don't know,
I mean, I guess
they're kind of cute.

They kind of
banter back and forth.

I suppose-- I suppose
she's attractive?

Mm, beachy.
Kind of beachy,
beachy hair.

- Oh, my God.
- Blonde, super shiny.

- Oh, and she wearing a fedora.
- Women who wear hats,
very specific.

I know,
and she actually
looks good in it.

God, if I wore a fedora,
I'd look like Mickey Rourke.

Oh, and get this,
she calls him Robbie.

- No, she doesn't.
- Yes, she does.

And Robbie is wearing
a leather jacket,

Robbie has paste
in his hair,

and Robbie is wearing
a leather necklace!

!
- Although, I might've
made that part up, actually.

My God,
who is this woman?

Oh, I have great idea.

Okay, I'm gonna hang up,
but check your phone
in 30 seconds, okay?

Okay, okay.

Perfect.

- Got it.

- Send, send, send.

Wine!

Thanks for nothing,
Diane.

What the fuck are you doing?
You're insane.

Oh, my God.

So, uh, what do you
think of Jackie?

- Oh, she's terrific!

- Yeah!
- Yeah.

- It's like I hit
the fucking lottery.
- Mm-hmm.

I mean, I really--
I thought I was gonna
be out there

shaking the tree
for a while,

going to
Knicks games alone,

meeting other women,
fucking up.

And then Jackie
just sneaks up on me.

I think she's really
something special.

I met Diane at
the glove counter at Saks.

I bought gloves
for my wife,

and I was done
with my wife

and my search
for true love

and, I guess,
my search for gloves.

I haven't
introduced her
to Frances yet.

That's
the next hurdle.

I think it could be
a little dicey.

Yeah, that's
a terrible idea.

I'm gonna handle this
like a peace treaty,
you know?

Frances over here,
Jackie over here,

me right in the middle
with a big smile on my face.

I'm gonna keep things
light and airy.

Maybe even do it
from a moving car.

Maybe just don't even
do it at all.

See this scar?

That's from the first time
Carolyn met Diane
at the movies.

"Jurassic Park 3D."

Wouldn't think
those flimsy glasses
could break skin.

Huh.

Never thought of Carolyn
as a stabber.

They all are.

Fuck.

- Hi, Frances.

Frances:
Hey, listen to me--

Robert has brought
his new girlfriend

over to Nick
and Diane's house.

Now, Diane
always sees the good,

so I need you
to go over there right now,

and see
something bad, okay?

I see the "Ohio Method"
still has some kinks
to work out.

I appreciate
your faith in me.
I'm on it.

You're true blue.
Bye.

Oh, I don't have to
freaking run anymore.

It was 100K
off the asking.

Anyway,
I thought to myself,
"Who is this crazy woman?"

Well, now this crazy woman
owns your house.

- Aw, you do own my house.
- You two are so cute.

- Did you invite someone
without telling me?

I left a message
on your cell.

Oh, did you?

- Hey, I was
spring cleaning

and I found Nick's bowl,
so I thought I would
return it.

Where is she?

We're just
finishing up pizza.

- Look who's here!

Jackie?

Robbie.

Dallas?

Wait,
how do you know...?

This is crazy.
Dallas is my shrink.

Hey!

What a funny

and a-an extremely
unethical coincidence
this is.

I, uh...

I'm gonna--
I'm gonna go home now.

Was that
my mixing bowl?

Dal?

Hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey!

- Hey!
- Dallas: Hey.

You know, uh, I can't
be late for my train.

I called you
all last night.

I called you again
this morning.

- Frances, I can't.

- I can't talk
about her.

Oh, my God,
you couldn't
make this up.

You're more likely
to get struck by lightning

or crushed in
an elevator shaft.

She's my patient.

Jackie
is my patient.

I'm her therapist.

What?

That's fantastic!

No, it's not.

No. Oh, my God,
is she the patient
that has, um,

t-the Tricho-- you know,
the thing where

- Frances, I can't
talk about her!

I mean,
it just violates
every tenet

of doctor-patient
confidentiality.

And now I'm screwed.

I have to break up
with her.

I've lost a client.

Oh.

Oh, my God,
I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.
Really, really, I am.

But now, you know,
you're free to tell me
everything, right?

Why? Why do you
really wanna know?

Why do you really not
want to tell me?

Because nothing good
will come of it.

The more you know,
the more you're gonna
wanna know.

Trust me.
I once Googled
Turner's new wife.

I ended up a day later
on Pinterest

obsessing about
her sister's new
kitchen remodel.

Oh, oh, my.

- Yeah. Yeah, you're right.
- ( train horn blaring
in distance )

No, no, no.

You should-- you-- go.
Catch your train.

- All right.
- Okay.

Very wise.

Is she
a good therapist?

I've known Dallas
a long time.

- She's batshit.
- No, she's great.

She's super smart
and empathetic.

Oh, so she
brainwashed you.

Nope, I'm good.

- Mm.
- You know
you can answer that.

- No, it's okay.
- What if it's about
one of your kids?

Yeah, you're right.

Hello?

Hey, Frances.

Uh-huh.

What?

Uh, sh-- ah,
it's an idea.

Okay,
I'll give it
a "tink."

All right,
have a nice day.

- Nothing.

Nothing at all.

Yeah, she was
on her way to--

oh, you know what,
I just had a thought.

Um, no pressure.

Do you think
you'd be interested

in going to Lila's
birthday party?

Did Frances
just invite me?

- Maybe.
- Well, I
would love to come,

but I do not wanna
stress you out.

Me? Oh, no.

I'd be thrilled!

I mean, no,
there's nothing cooler.

And not just because
it's an ice skating party.

Robbie, don't worry.
She's gonna like me.

Most people do.

It's a loading zone.
Do you see me unloading?

!
- You need to move.

I will,
just when I've finished
unloading everything.

Could you
pick up the pace?

Oh, my God,
you did it!

- You did it!
- I've been here
three minutes.

Oh, God!
Are these--
they're all finished?

- Yes.
- More like 15,
but who's counting?

- Move!
- Oh, my God,
she finished her painting.

For the love of God,
Marla, let her unload!

They're stunning.

They're stunning!

I really--
I just-- I can't--

I really can't
believe you did this.

I mean, I'm looking
at them, but I'm...

So one, two,
three, four,

and the one
I have already,
that's five.

Okay, listen,
I don't wanna
freak you out,

but if you could
paint a few more,
we have a show.

- I'm not doing a show.
- Oh, Sylvia, can we, really--
can we not do this again?

I'm busy,
you're in
a loading zone.

Oh, pay no attention
to that if possible.

- Come on, come on.
- This place isn't bad.

- A barn or something.

No, it's not
a barn.

It's nice.

But it would be
a whole lot nicer

if this entire wall

was covered in the works
of Sylvia MacDonald.

There's no way I could
do more paintings.

I'll give you a month.

- We're gonna end up...
- Thank you!

- Aw, thanks!
- You're welcome!

- Yeah!

Let's go!

- Hit the ice!

- Don't go fast.
No hotdogging.
- Okay!

Beep-beep!
Beep-beep!

- This is fun,
isn't it?
- Yeah!

Have you-- have you seen
Dad or Jackie yet?

No, I haven't
seen them.

There are a lot
of good skaters
here tonight.

You know, even though
I helped co-plan
a skating party,

I just don't feel
like skating tonight.

Why?

'Cause I don't
know how to.

Is that Frances?

It is.
Let me wave her over.

- No, I'll just go say hi.
- Fra--!

No, Jackie!
No! Jackie!

No one on the ice
without skates, man.

Oh, really, dude?

- Oh, there's Tiffany
and Rachel.
- Oh. Okay.

- Have-- whoops.
Have fun!
- Jackie!

Hey, Frances.

- I'm Jackie.
- Hi, Jackie.

Hi.
Thanks for coming.

- Whoo! Sorry.
- Thank you for the invite.

It was very--
it was big of you.

Not big like--

- I'm, uh-- I'm suddenly
very weirded out.

Gosh, I'm-- I'm finding
this entire situation

- incredibly comfortable.

- No one will know.
- Man.

Just put on
some skates.

And for the whole
Tom car thing,

I just--
I'm so sorry.

It was such a horrible way
for us to start out.

No, no, no,
really.

How would you know
that I birthed a felon?

- But that is only
his second felony.
- Man, come on, dude.

- And Tom just seems like
he wanted to have some fun.

- Yeah.
- He and Robert
seem so alike.

Really?

God, I don't see that.
I don't know.

Tom is so, um,
steady, you know,
and he's resilient.

And Robert is
much more like Lila,

you know,
very emotional,

you know,
and very sensitive.

You know,
I think Ohio
almost leveled him.

- Yeah, it was so great
that you were with him.
- Well, yeah, of course.

You know, even though
we're, you know-- we're...

- that way and that way...
- Mm-hmm.

...I still, obviously--
I care about him.

Of course.
I mean, you wouldn't
sleep together again

if you still didn't
care about each other.

Oh, he--
he told you that?

Yeah!
I mean, it was not
the greatest thing to hear,

but he said
it didn't mean anything.

He said it was
a really intense time,
so I get it.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was--
it was intense.

The truth is I probably
should be thanking you.

For
For sleeping with him?

No.

For divorcing him.

Oh.

Well, my pleasure.

- Good.

This music sucks.
Let's go find the DJ.

Oh, I already
took care of that.

♪ Stand and fight,
we do consider ♪

♪ Reminded of
an inner pact... ♪

I wonder who picked
the music.

Oh, a turn.
Lila, I spun!

♪ Happy birthday,
dear Lila ♪

♪ Happy birthday
to you! ♪

All right,
let me take a picture!
Wait, wait, wait!

- Let me get a picture,
let me get a picture!
- Happy birthday.

- Thank you.
- Wait, wait, wait,
let me get a picture.

Okay, hold on.

Make a wish, sweetie.
Make a wish!

- Happy birthday, honey.

- Girl: Yeah!
- Robert: Nice job. Good work.

Robert:
These are her friends.

It's a good group.

Good ethics.

Hey, Tom!

You missed the cake!

Do you wanna--
do you wanna do
one of the--

- the-- the first
slice with Lila?
- I am okay.

Do you wanna lick the can--
one of the candles?

Hey, Mom, Tom and I
are gonna go catch a ride
from Dad and Jackie.

- Thanks for the party!
Bye!
- Oh.

- Bye!
- All right,
see you outside.

Hey, great job
on the party.

Yeah.

Nice working
with you.

- Oh, and thanks for--

- thanks for that.
- Oh. That was nice.

So you, uh--
you want me to
help you load the car?

No, no, I'm good.
This is-- this is it.

- This is my last one.

Yeah.

Really,
you can go.

All right.

Bye.

♪ Looks like it's over ♪

♪ You knew
I couldn't stay ♪

♪ She's coming home today ♪

♪ We had a good thing ♪

♪ I'll miss
your sweet love ♪

♪ Why must you
look at me that way? ♪

♪ It's over ♪

♪ Sad eyes ♪

♪ Turn the other way ♪

♪ I don't wanna
see you cry ♪

♪ Sad eyes ♪

♪ You knew
there'd come a day ♪

♪ When we would have to
say goodbye ♪

♪ Try to remember
the magic that we shared ♪

♪ In time, your broken heart
will mend ♪

♪ I never used you... ♪

Hey, dad.

I have to pee. Let me--
Is that a bra?

-Oh, hi Robert.

DIANE: Hey Frances,
how you and Andrew doing?

Things are more serious
with my mailman.

You've got more layers
to you than I thought.

How many layers
did you think I had?

Two, three.

She's my daughter.
She doesn't need a dad.

We just got our
kyu brown belts in Aikido.

So, we're all going
Kung Fu fighting?

We should talk about consent.

Let's say that a girl
wanted to kiss your penis--

-Mom!
-You know--

All right-- Just--
No means no!