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1
00:00:04,671 --> 00:00:06,715
Couch. Lap. Play.
2
00:00:06,798 --> 00:00:08,091
You want to play?
3
00:00:08,174 --> 00:00:10,093
You want to play on my lap?
4
00:00:10,176 --> 00:00:11,886
Or the couch?
5
00:00:11,970 --> 00:00:14,556
Eat. Car. Car.
6
00:00:14,639 --> 00:00:16,349
Now you're just
fucking with me.
7
00:00:16,433 --> 00:00:17,934
Girl's trip!
8
00:00:18,017 --> 00:00:20,395
Gentle.
Morning energy, please.
9
00:00:20,478 --> 00:00:23,231
I've been up since 3:30 am.
I've already had dinner.
10
00:00:23,314 --> 00:00:25,442
[ Grunting ]
11
00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:27,694
Y'know how we've always
fantasized about
12
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:31,281
touring the regional offices in
the lower northeastern region?
13
00:00:31,364 --> 00:00:33,116
-No.
-Poison groundwater?
14
00:00:33,199 --> 00:00:36,327
Interspecial dating?
'70s architecture?
15
00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:37,746
Hard pass.
Mere.
16
00:00:37,829 --> 00:00:40,457
It's just two best friends
hitting the road,
17
00:00:40,540 --> 00:00:43,334
eating snacks, harmonizing
to songs from my aughts mix.
18
00:00:43,418 --> 00:00:45,086
And best of all,
you don't have a choice
19
00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:46,963
because I'm your boss,
technically.
Technically.
20
00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:48,882
Car's packed
and ready to go!
21
00:00:48,965 --> 00:00:51,384
Oh, good,
printed directions.
22
00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:52,802
Where the hell's
Buttzville?
23
00:00:52,886 --> 00:00:54,637
It's where we make
The Lady Pump.
24
00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:56,097
The what?
25
00:00:56,181 --> 00:00:58,141
From the Little Miss Sebben
personal protection line.
26
00:00:58,224 --> 00:00:59,642
It's A pink shotgun
for the gal
27
00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:01,978
who wants to look chic
downing a grouse.
28
00:01:02,061 --> 00:01:04,439
They'll let us rack
a couple, you know.
29
00:01:04,522 --> 00:01:05,815
Fine.
I'm in.
30
00:01:05,899 --> 00:01:07,692
Why didn't you lead
with the guns?
31
00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,110
You said it was urgent?
32
00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:10,653
Yep.
We're going to Buttzville.
33
00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:13,031
Wow, pegging really
has gone mainstream.
34
00:01:13,114 --> 00:01:16,201
[ Laughs nervously ]
What's pegging?
35
00:01:16,284 --> 00:01:18,953
Oh. The town.
Rack a couple for me.
36
00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:21,831
Ugh, it's south of Assburg?
I'm back out.
37
00:01:21,915 --> 00:01:26,127
Come on, we never spend any time
where it's just us girls.
38
00:01:28,296 --> 00:01:31,591
Charlie, as much I'd love
a contralto in the car,
39
00:01:31,674 --> 00:01:34,385
I'm gonna need you to hold
down the fort while we're gone.
40
00:01:34,469 --> 00:01:37,555
I now pronounce you interim
CEO of Sebben & Sebben.
41
00:01:37,639 --> 00:01:40,099
Oh, oh, oh, wait, wait.
42
00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:42,310
Okay, I know where
this thing's been.
43
00:01:42,393 --> 00:01:43,645
Buttzville.
44
00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:45,230
♪ Hey! ♪
45
00:01:45,313 --> 00:01:46,856
[ Rapping ] ♪ Who's the girl
that saves the world? ♪
46
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,274
♪ Hey! ♪
47
00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:49,609
[ Rapping ] ♪ Oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God ♪
48
00:01:49,692 --> 00:01:51,528
[ Imitating fanfare ] Birdgirl!
49
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:55,073
Mmm.
Girl's trip?
50
00:01:55,156 --> 00:01:57,408
I told you these outfits
made sense.
51
00:01:57,492 --> 00:02:00,995
Gillian, can you give Birdcat
his shots while I'm away?
52
00:02:01,079 --> 00:02:03,331
[ Gasps ]
It would be my great honor.
53
00:02:03,414 --> 00:02:07,460
You and you --
co and dependent.
54
00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:09,212
One shot every
25 minutes.
55
00:02:09,295 --> 00:02:10,755
He will resist.
56
00:02:10,839 --> 00:02:14,843
But if he's a good boy,
you can give him his spankys.
57
00:02:14,926 --> 00:02:16,052
[ Cat meows ]
58
00:02:16,135 --> 00:02:19,097
We could always
just put her down.
59
00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:20,849
Charlie: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Yeah, yeah.
60
00:02:20,932 --> 00:02:23,518
I hear you,
but you can't run this.
61
00:02:23,601 --> 00:02:25,270
She's all chin.
62
00:02:28,022 --> 00:02:31,317
Gillian, text Judy's new
headshot to "The Times."
63
00:02:31,401 --> 00:02:33,194
Ow!
What new headshot?
64
00:02:33,278 --> 00:02:34,404
Ow!
65
00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,697
[ Cat growls ]
66
00:02:35,780 --> 00:02:36,823
Oh.
67
00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:39,117
[ Sighs ]
[ Computer dings ]
68
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:41,536
Oh, my God.
It's time.
69
00:02:41,619 --> 00:02:43,705
Gillian,
come in here, please.
70
00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:45,832
Ow! Can it wait?!
71
00:02:45,915 --> 00:02:48,167
I've got
the Leadership Stick.
72
00:02:50,211 --> 00:02:51,921
Yes? Aah!
73
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:54,048
Oh...
You'll need this.
74
00:02:54,132 --> 00:02:56,634
[ Inhales deeply ]
75
00:02:56,718 --> 00:02:59,929
[ Screaming ]
76
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:03,516
What the fuck is that?!
Aah!
77
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:07,103
Gillian.
Computer. Watch.
78
00:03:07,186 --> 00:03:09,814
Sugar. Blood.
High. High.
79
00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:13,526
♪♪
80
00:03:13,610 --> 00:03:15,778
Judy, thank you
for shepherding me
81
00:03:15,862 --> 00:03:17,864
through my Rejuvication
process.
82
00:03:17,947 --> 00:03:20,533
And special thanks for not
pawning the whole thing off
83
00:03:20,617 --> 00:03:22,827
on that dipshit, Gillian.
84
00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:24,287
-Hi, Gillian.
-Hello.
85
00:03:24,370 --> 00:03:27,707
Every 19 years for the past
thousand or so,
86
00:03:27,790 --> 00:03:30,335
I, like the versions
of me before me,
87
00:03:30,418 --> 00:03:35,798
shed my old skin and emerge a
more evolved version of myself.
88
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:37,508
It keeps me at the top
of my game
89
00:03:37,592 --> 00:03:39,802
and staves off any fine lines.
90
00:03:39,886 --> 00:03:43,139
You said it was exfoliants
and river hooch. Over.
91
00:03:43,222 --> 00:03:44,974
Don't make me come out there.
92
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,977
During stage one, it's vital
to keep my sack damp.
93
00:03:48,061 --> 00:03:49,479
Using the provided ass bag,
94
00:03:49,562 --> 00:03:51,814
simply hose my sack
every eight minutes
95
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:53,816
and keep
the walkie charged.
96
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:55,318
Khaire!
97
00:03:55,401 --> 00:04:00,156
♪♪
98
00:04:00,239 --> 00:04:03,826
If feces be the food of love,
play on.
99
00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:06,829
[ Phone rings ]
You got O'Brien.
[ Phone rings ]
You got O'Brien.
100
00:04:06,913 --> 00:04:08,706
I told you never to
call me here.
101
00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:10,625
Okay, well, maybe I forgot to.
102
00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:12,752
I understand.
Thank you.
103
00:04:12,835 --> 00:04:14,587
And never call me here.
104
00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:17,882
[ Speed dialing ]
105
00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:20,510
Boys?
Meet me in the Nest.
106
00:04:22,178 --> 00:04:23,596
My source in the parking deck
107
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,848
tells me the power three
have left the building.
108
00:04:25,932 --> 00:04:28,267
And it's our time to implement
some experimental ideas
109
00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:32,021
that the man -- Judy --
says are too hot for prime time.
110
00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,607
So who's down for blowing
the roof off Sebben & Sebben?
111
00:04:34,691 --> 00:04:36,317
Question:
Did you mean to invite me?
112
00:04:36,401 --> 00:04:38,861
Because sometimes people think
they're texting Paul R.
113
00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:40,113
and they're disappointed.
114
00:04:40,196 --> 00:04:42,031
I just needed
a third set of balls.
115
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,199
Uh-huh.
116
00:04:43,282 --> 00:04:45,618
By "set" do you mean
"a pair" because...
117
00:04:45,702 --> 00:04:47,370
So, every day, some Tom,
118
00:04:47,453 --> 00:04:49,330
Dick, or Harriet
makes a dumbass comment
119
00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:51,207
or unwanted advance,
word gets out,
120
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:52,875
and they get cancelled,
we get sued,
121
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:54,377
and someone
has to clean up the mess.
122
00:04:54,460 --> 00:04:55,753
Please, charge that.
123
00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:57,714
That's why I've perfected
a new technology.
124
00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,090
Ahem.
125
00:04:59,173 --> 00:05:02,051
That's why mostly Evie
perfected a new technology.
126
00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:04,512
We track employee's online
footprint to predict
127
00:05:04,595 --> 00:05:07,181
inappropriate behavior
seconds before it happens.
128
00:05:07,265 --> 00:05:09,600
Like, in six seconds,
Paul will post
129
00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,394
that he invented
Taco Tuesday.
130
00:05:11,477 --> 00:05:15,815
Now we can stop cancellations
by precanceling the offender.
131
00:05:17,025 --> 00:05:20,862
And ethics are in the gray area,
right where they belong.
132
00:05:20,945 --> 00:05:24,198
FYI, anyone asks questions,
and I will drop a dime
133
00:05:24,282 --> 00:05:27,160
on all of you so fast
it'll make your nuts drop.
134
00:05:27,243 --> 00:05:28,411
Well, one of 'em.
135
00:05:28,494 --> 00:05:30,121
Is she going to be here
the whole time?
136
00:05:30,204 --> 00:05:33,624
'Cause according to my book
of Guy Rules, no ladies allowed!
137
00:05:33,708 --> 00:05:36,252
It is literally illegal
to say that.
138
00:05:36,335 --> 00:05:38,171
Get out! Get out!
Get out!
139
00:05:38,254 --> 00:05:40,923
Get out of my room, Tiffany,
or I'm gonna tell mom!
140
00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,216
Gotta go anyway.
141
00:05:42,300 --> 00:05:45,470
Ballet recital,
in case anyone cares.
142
00:05:45,553 --> 00:05:48,973
Yeah,
that won't be happening.
143
00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:51,267
So, are there risks involved?
Yes.
144
00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:52,643
Is it worth it?
No.
145
00:05:52,727 --> 00:05:54,062
Are we going to have
some fun?
146
00:05:54,145 --> 00:05:55,480
Abso-fuckin'-lutely.
147
00:05:55,563 --> 00:05:58,149
I've always struggled connecting
with men until now.
148
00:05:58,232 --> 00:05:59,984
Look at us!
The trinity!
149
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:01,736
Thought I invited
Paul R.
150
00:06:01,819 --> 00:06:03,571
Here's the bean dip.
151
00:06:03,654 --> 00:06:06,365
Precanceling
looks a lot like kidnapping...
152
00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:07,950
because it is.
[ Beeping ]
153
00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:10,328
Precancel alert:
Brad from BizDev is about
154
00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:13,206
to initiate a "lean and creep."
155
00:06:13,289 --> 00:06:15,124
Bag 'em and drag 'em.
156
00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:16,459
[ Bones crack ]
157
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:18,961
[ Grunting ]
158
00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,963
Oh, hey, Sarah, look for
an NDA in your inbox,
159
00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:24,717
and I would sign it
if I were you.
160
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,302
Go for Miles from Accounting.
161
00:06:26,385 --> 00:06:28,930
Impending African-American
Vernacular English.
162
00:06:29,013 --> 00:06:30,598
♪ Watching
"Neighborhood Watch." ♪
163
00:06:30,681 --> 00:06:32,600
♪ Boost Mobile on the plug,
what you need, I got ♪
164
00:06:32,683 --> 00:06:34,477
[ Grunts ]
A blaccent, Miles?
165
00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:36,646
Really?!
A blaccent?!
166
00:06:36,729 --> 00:06:37,814
Argh!
167
00:06:37,897 --> 00:06:39,899
Go for Sandra from
Consumer Affairs.
168
00:06:39,982 --> 00:06:41,275
Imminent harassment.
169
00:06:41,359 --> 00:06:44,487
Hey, Mike, think I can fit
this whole thing in my --
170
00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:45,988
Ohh!
171
00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:49,534
In God's name, tell me you were
gonna say "mouth," Sandra.
172
00:06:49,617 --> 00:06:52,829
Ohh!
HR nightmare averted.
An HR nightmare averted.
Ohh!
HR nightmare averted.
An HR nightmare averted.
173
00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:55,331
Go for Rudy from Sales for...
174
00:06:55,414 --> 00:06:56,624
[ Groans ]
175
00:06:56,707 --> 00:06:58,292
Oh, boy.
176
00:06:58,376 --> 00:07:01,337
TGIF, mon!
177
00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:02,755
[ Grunts ]
178
00:07:02,839 --> 00:07:04,590
[ Grunts ]
179
00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,511
Me! Us!
Boys! Balls!
180
00:07:08,594 --> 00:07:12,014
Bruh, we got to make sure we're
always on each other's teams,
181
00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:13,558
right, like forever.
182
00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:15,560
Whoa!
Hello! Hello!
183
00:07:15,643 --> 00:07:18,604
Another young lady sliding
in my DMs.
184
00:07:18,688 --> 00:07:20,815
That's a spam text, Paul.
185
00:07:20,898 --> 00:07:23,151
I'm just trying to find
a persona that fits.
186
00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:26,863
[ Muffled ] Brad!
Can't breathe!
187
00:07:26,946 --> 00:07:28,656
[ Phone chimes ]
188
00:07:31,367 --> 00:07:32,451
Birdcat.
189
00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,954
Codfish.
Florentine-style.
190
00:07:35,037 --> 00:07:36,998
Charlie: Feeling
a little dry in here.
191
00:07:37,081 --> 00:07:38,207
Aah! Ooh!
192
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:42,587
5, 4, 3, 2...
193
00:07:42,670 --> 00:07:44,380
Ahh.
194
00:07:44,463 --> 00:07:47,216
[ Panting ]
195
00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:52,513
Ah, bubala, buttercup, you've
completed the wetting process.
196
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:53,931
Oh, thank Jesus.
197
00:07:54,015 --> 00:07:56,225
Time to start phase two.
198
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:57,852
Please tell me you eat me.
199
00:07:57,935 --> 00:07:59,187
Unfortunately, no.
200
00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:01,522
But we are gonna need a car.
201
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:05,860
[ Grunting loudly ]
202
00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:09,822
Hey, Gill.
Happy hour?
203
00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:11,240
I wish.
204
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:14,076
Unfortunately, though, I got
to get this rug to the cleaners.
205
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,453
I diarrhea'd on it.
206
00:08:15,536 --> 00:08:17,079
Fun!
Next time!
207
00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:19,415
You can do this.
[ Grunts ]
208
00:08:19,498 --> 00:08:21,042
It's just physics.
209
00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:22,460
Argh, fuck!
210
00:08:22,543 --> 00:08:24,670
Charlie:
What's going on out there?
211
00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:26,923
[ Cell phone ringing ]
Man on TV: 22 pounds of heroin
was seized along with...
212
00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:28,341
Well, well, well.
213
00:08:28,424 --> 00:08:31,093
The day has come.
214
00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:32,595
Remember when I sent out
an all-staff
215
00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:34,430
saying anyone
could borrow my truck?
216
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,391
Every single person replied.
217
00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:38,851
Except you.
218
00:08:38,935 --> 00:08:41,729
But I knew one day
you'd come a-beggin'.
219
00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:43,481
And you're right.
I was wrong to not reply
220
00:08:43,564 --> 00:08:45,900
to your completely
inappropriate all-staff.
221
00:08:45,983 --> 00:08:49,237
No, you were wrong to think
I would forgive you.
222
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:51,239
[ Crash ]
223
00:08:51,322 --> 00:08:52,615
Not so fast!
224
00:08:52,698 --> 00:08:55,618
Where my truck goes,
I go.
225
00:08:55,701 --> 00:08:56,953
[ Tires squeal ]
226
00:08:57,036 --> 00:09:00,539
Ow, ow, ow, ow!
Ow, ow, ow, ow!
227
00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:02,124
Aah!
228
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:03,793
Man: 911?
What's your emergency?
229
00:09:03,876 --> 00:09:05,920
It's Jessica.
From Accounting, yes.
230
00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:07,380
I'd like to report
a stolen truck.
231
00:09:07,463 --> 00:09:08,965
And I happen to know
there's a brick of skag
232
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:10,800
in the rocker panel.
233
00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:12,301
From accounting, yes.
234
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,095
[ Purring ]
235
00:09:14,178 --> 00:09:15,721
You've always scared
the shit out of me,
236
00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,807
but I'm sleep-deprived
and I've had a medium
237
00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:20,434
Diet Dr. Pepper so I'm feeling
a little fuck-it.
238
00:09:20,518 --> 00:09:22,186
What's going on?!
239
00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:24,855
Charlie: Let's just say I come
from a highly evolved race,
240
00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:26,565
a race of one.
241
00:09:26,649 --> 00:09:30,987
I don't even know how I got
this way, I just am.
242
00:09:31,070 --> 00:09:32,530
Where are we?
243
00:09:32,613 --> 00:09:35,783
Um, if Jeffrey Dahmer
were a farmer...
244
00:09:35,866 --> 00:09:38,828
We're here!
[ Squealing ]
245
00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:42,206
[ Whistles ]
Annabel! ChiChi!
246
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:43,749
You're late!
247
00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:45,459
Where'd you find this one?
248
00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,003
Am I dumb?
249
00:09:47,086 --> 00:09:50,172
Oh, my God!
That pig is adorable.
250
00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,632
[ Whistles ]
251
00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:57,430
♪♪
252
00:09:57,513 --> 00:09:58,973
I love animals!
253
00:09:59,056 --> 00:10:01,434
Speaking of which,
meet my son, CJ!
254
00:10:01,517 --> 00:10:04,603
He was but a wisp the last time
you saw him, eh, Charlie?
255
00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:07,023
She must be molting.
256
00:10:07,106 --> 00:10:10,484
We've got...elev--
twelve pieces of chicken,
257
00:10:10,568 --> 00:10:13,696
so everyone can have four.
258
00:10:13,779 --> 00:10:15,114
Four pieces of chicken.
259
00:10:15,197 --> 00:10:18,659
Stop trying to force
chicken down our throats.
260
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:19,994
Nobody likes your rub!
261
00:10:20,077 --> 00:10:22,204
You don't like my rub!
262
00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:24,040
We'll order Thai.
263
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:25,708
Gillian...
264
00:10:25,791 --> 00:10:27,543
I've got this!
No, I've got this!
I've got this!
No, I've got this!
265
00:10:27,626 --> 00:10:29,211
5, 4, 3, 2...
I'm her assistant!
266
00:10:29,295 --> 00:10:30,588
I'm her attendant!
267
00:10:30,671 --> 00:10:32,882
[ Both gasp ]
They both gasp.
[ Both gasp ]
They both gasp.
268
00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:37,261
A moment shared between
a woman and a man.
269
00:10:37,345 --> 00:10:38,721
We'll both do it.
270
00:10:38,804 --> 00:10:41,098
So you know,
I don't work well with others.
271
00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:44,727
There've been a few
HR complaints.
272
00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:46,020
Those your guncles?
273
00:10:46,103 --> 00:10:48,439
All will be
revealed in time.
274
00:10:48,522 --> 00:10:50,524
Mind the clypeal sheath!
275
00:10:50,608 --> 00:10:53,652
Welcome to the Cancel Cabin!
276
00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:55,946
This is bullshit!
277
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:58,324
We prevented each of you
from being cancelled.
278
00:10:58,407 --> 00:11:00,117
You'll still be able
to Google yourself
279
00:11:00,201 --> 00:11:03,204
and go to a kids' talent show.
You're welcome.
280
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,706
Dog With Bucket Hat: Some of you
will pump Sebben & Sebben stock,
281
00:11:05,790 --> 00:11:07,291
others will dump it.
282
00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:09,377
Paychecks can be cashed there.
283
00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:12,713
We will issue a debit card
connected to your paycheck.
284
00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:15,007
Your card can be used
at the company store
285
00:11:15,091 --> 00:11:17,593
where everything costs $14.
286
00:11:17,676 --> 00:11:21,597
Is it supposed to be this
c-c-cold in here?
287
00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,724
Those are $14.
Officer?
288
00:11:23,808 --> 00:11:29,146
Yes, yes it's supposed to be
this cold because this is work!
289
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:32,274
My job is to make sure
things run smoothly.
290
00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:35,945
And her job is to tune
up troublemakers.
291
00:11:36,028 --> 00:11:40,157
Oh, my God, guys,
I am loving this persona!
292
00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:42,118
Whoa.
293
00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:44,954
An original 19th century
hatching room.
294
00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:46,789
They don't make 'em
like this anymore.
295
00:11:46,872 --> 00:11:48,958
I do a lot of reading
on birthing techniques.
296
00:11:49,041 --> 00:11:52,795
That's how I know
it's pronounced birthing.
297
00:11:52,878 --> 00:11:54,004
Charlie: Whoa!
298
00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:56,090
Well, looks like stage
one's complete,
299
00:11:56,173 --> 00:11:58,843
so if you don't need me anymore,
I'm gonna call it.
300
00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:01,137
This part of the process
could take days.
301
00:12:01,220 --> 00:12:04,682
I could use another steady
pair of hands and...
302
00:12:04,765 --> 00:12:06,475
sturdy calves.
303
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,561
I do wide squats
three days a week.
304
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:11,021
Please stay.
For her.
305
00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:12,815
For...me.
306
00:12:12,898 --> 00:12:14,525
Do you have
a points program?
307
00:12:14,608 --> 00:12:18,279
I'll have CJ make up the guest
room where we keep the dolls.
308
00:12:18,362 --> 00:12:21,866
[ Rock music playing ]
309
00:12:21,949 --> 00:12:24,285
What's that?
310
00:12:24,368 --> 00:12:26,829
That's...our
office building.
311
00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:29,165
Where's the rest of it?
312
00:12:29,248 --> 00:12:30,791
And what's that?
313
00:12:30,875 --> 00:12:33,794
That's Cade.
He works in receiving.
314
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,754
Where's the rest of it?
315
00:12:36,755 --> 00:12:38,007
I'm being sexual.
316
00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:40,009
Mere, take a pic of me
in front of it.
317
00:12:40,092 --> 00:12:42,761
I've never seen a one-story
building!
318
00:12:45,848 --> 00:12:47,349
Guys, I've got something
to show you.
319
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:48,559
His teste?
320
00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:51,353
What do you give the men
who have everything?
321
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:54,190
Well, their very own
77-foot man bus!
322
00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:55,774
[ Horn blares ]
323
00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:02,239
I got a hook-up in
the recreational vehicle space.
324
00:13:02,323 --> 00:13:04,909
That margarita machine
ain't foolin' around.
325
00:13:04,992 --> 00:13:06,202
How'd you pay for this?
326
00:13:06,285 --> 00:13:08,829
Easy.
He gave me an 18.5%
327
00:13:08,913 --> 00:13:11,207
96 month loan
which I collateralized
328
00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:13,501
against the stack
we're gonna make out there.
329
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:16,212
It's all funny money,
right, bros? [ Laughs ]
330
00:13:16,295 --> 00:13:18,589
Fuck you,
the man-slash-Judy!
331
00:13:18,672 --> 00:13:20,883
That's our money, Paul.
Wait...
332
00:13:20,966 --> 00:13:23,886
is that an entire wall
of Big Macs?
333
00:13:24,803 --> 00:13:28,349
You must be wondering
what my part is in all this.
334
00:13:28,432 --> 00:13:31,393
I was more wondering why there's
a goat on the table, but sure.
335
00:13:31,477 --> 00:13:33,479
I come from a centuries-old line
of attendants
336
00:13:33,562 --> 00:13:35,940
who've ushered Miss Charlie
through her rebirth.
337
00:13:36,023 --> 00:13:39,235
And when I'm gone,
CJ will take my place.
338
00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:44,073
If, and when, he stops
forcing chicken on people!
339
00:13:44,907 --> 00:13:46,534
[ Splat! ]
You don't like my rub!
340
00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:50,162
Sure, I had other dreams,
but the enema bag,
341
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:51,872
she's a stern mistress.
342
00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:54,083
Oh, Charles, I understand.
343
00:13:54,166 --> 00:13:58,295
Because, I, too, was born with
my destiny already forewritten.
344
00:13:58,379 --> 00:14:01,215
The Sans pinky.
Everyone in my family has it.
345
00:14:01,298 --> 00:14:04,760
It's a genetic gift that
makes us superior assistants.
346
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:07,930
It allows me full keyboard
access with one hand.
347
00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:09,223
It's my gift.
348
00:14:09,306 --> 00:14:11,350
And my burden.
349
00:14:11,433 --> 00:14:13,435
♪♪
350
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:17,606
♪ The winner takes it all ♪
351
00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:21,902
♪ The loser's standing small ♪
352
00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:24,613
♪ Beside the victory ♪
353
00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:28,867
♪ That's her destiny ♪
354
00:14:30,244 --> 00:14:33,289
Bam! A crisp $50
to today's top closer,
355
00:14:33,372 --> 00:14:36,584
and it ain't gonna be
Hugh the way he's fucking going!
356
00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:38,836
Given that we've only been here
45 minutes,
357
00:14:38,919 --> 00:14:42,131
I'm not sure it's fair
to judge me. [ Groans ]
358
00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:44,967
Please, I beg you,
a little heat.
359
00:14:45,050 --> 00:14:47,636
I've lost feeling
below the waist.
360
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,264
Aw, happy holidays.
361
00:14:50,347 --> 00:14:52,600
[ Screams ]
362
00:14:52,683 --> 00:14:54,935
Thanks for supporting
my vision, fellas.
363
00:14:55,019 --> 00:14:57,813
This never would've happened
with Judy Ken Bottomline.
364
00:14:57,896 --> 00:15:00,399
[ Laughs ] Bottomline.
Classic.
365
00:15:00,482 --> 00:15:03,152
I tell ya, when I was four,
mother had one of her spells
366
00:15:03,235 --> 00:15:05,237
and took to her bed
for three years,
367
00:15:05,321 --> 00:15:07,448
making me the lady
of the house.
368
00:15:08,866 --> 00:15:10,576
Listen, maybe we -- us,
369
00:15:10,659 --> 00:15:12,995
are about more than
just ripping farts.
370
00:15:13,078 --> 00:15:15,956
When's the last time
you were vulnerable?
371
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,667
What do you wish you said
to your Gran Gran
372
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:21,170
before she passed?
373
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:23,213
[ Sniffles ]
374
00:15:23,297 --> 00:15:24,798
[ Sobs ]
375
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:27,176
Nana?
376
00:15:27,259 --> 00:15:28,510
Please, no.
Please, no.
377
00:15:28,594 --> 00:15:30,763
I've got a family of pugs
at home.
378
00:15:30,846 --> 00:15:33,557
I brought stuff
for s'mores!
379
00:15:33,641 --> 00:15:36,185
Well, I forgot marshmallows
and chocolate.
380
00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:39,980
It's been lovely
having you here.
381
00:15:40,064 --> 00:15:42,733
We're used to rattling
around the manse by ourselves.
382
00:15:42,816 --> 00:15:45,778
Just out of curiosity,
where's CJ's mother?
383
00:15:45,861 --> 00:15:48,280
He doesn't have one.
I grew him in the hatching room.
384
00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:50,366
♪ The winner takes it all ♪
385
00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:52,201
♪ Takes it all ♪
386
00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:54,119
♪ The loser has to fall ♪
387
00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:55,954
♪ Has to fall ♪
388
00:15:56,038 --> 00:15:57,873
♪ It's simple and it's plain ♪
389
00:15:57,956 --> 00:15:59,500
♪ Yes, it's plain ♪
390
00:15:59,583 --> 00:16:01,502
♪ Why should I complain? ♪
391
00:16:01,585 --> 00:16:03,504
♪ Why complain? ♪
392
00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:05,798
♪ But tell me, does she kiss? ♪
393
00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:06,965
[ Tool whirring ]
394
00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:08,509
You pushed it
too far, Paul.
395
00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:13,013
You broke the only rule --
you tried to make us feel.
396
00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:16,558
I started to feel something
and I never feel something!
397
00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,018
I'm so pissed at you, bro!
398
00:16:18,102 --> 00:16:19,687
Uh, what do we do with him?
399
00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:21,438
How about we just leave
his body in the woods
400
00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:23,691
and then wolves will come
and finish the work for us.
401
00:16:23,774 --> 00:16:25,651
I like the way
this is going.
402
00:16:25,734 --> 00:16:27,945
No body, no crime.
403
00:16:28,028 --> 00:16:29,905
I'd like to strenuously object
to the manner
404
00:16:29,988 --> 00:16:32,116
in which we have
been detained in this cabin.
405
00:16:32,199 --> 00:16:34,159
Let us handle this, Frenchie,
406
00:16:34,243 --> 00:16:37,329
we're going to get
our $14 worth.
407
00:16:37,413 --> 00:16:39,623
[ Gagging ]
408
00:16:42,876 --> 00:16:46,130
Because it's us, I'm gonna
assume there's no fire exit.
409
00:16:46,213 --> 00:16:49,591
Yep!
Now we'll be together forever.
410
00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:51,093
[ Laughs ]
411
00:16:51,176 --> 00:16:53,721
[ Retches ] Oh, God.
412
00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:55,973
Gillian: If we ever shared
divine love,
413
00:16:56,056 --> 00:16:59,977
you must protect me
and my pinkie at all costs.
414
00:17:04,106 --> 00:17:05,941
[ Meows ]
415
00:17:06,024 --> 00:17:07,317
[ Gasps ]
Did you hear that?
416
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:08,944
Probably a chicken.
417
00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:11,363
Ah, your lips.
What was that?
418
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,115
Probably CJ
or a chicken.
419
00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:15,617
Just go back
to what you were doing.
420
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:17,119
[ Gasps ]
421
00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:18,454
[ Whimpers ]
422
00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:21,123
Oh, dear God,
what have we done?
423
00:17:21,206 --> 00:17:24,168
Charlie: Get me the fuck
out of here!
424
00:17:28,130 --> 00:17:31,008
You had one job and now
my Rejuvication is blown!
425
00:17:31,091 --> 00:17:34,803
And you released my skin sack
before we had a chance to fuse.
426
00:17:34,887 --> 00:17:37,097
By the way,
I could hear everything.
427
00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:40,809
Charles, you talk way
too much when you're fucking.
428
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:42,686
And you're fired.
429
00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:44,021
But my blood oath!
430
00:17:44,104 --> 00:17:46,982
Like my father and his father
before him.
431
00:17:47,066 --> 00:17:48,484
[ Engine starts ]
432
00:17:48,567 --> 00:17:51,570
[ Horn plays "Dixie" ]
433
00:17:51,653 --> 00:17:53,238
That thing can drive?
434
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,990
That thing is 10% of me,
435
00:17:55,073 --> 00:17:58,285
so it can do anything it
damn well sets its mind to.
436
00:17:59,703 --> 00:18:01,246
Put those in milk.
437
00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:05,167
[ Country music plays ]
438
00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:08,170
[ Cell phone rings ]
439
00:18:08,253 --> 00:18:09,588
You got Diane here.
440
00:18:09,671 --> 00:18:10,964
Judy?
Diane!
441
00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:13,091
Regular old line worker
Diane.
442
00:18:13,175 --> 00:18:14,885
Hey, uh, we've run into
a little problem
443
00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:16,845
and I think you guys
might want to get back here.
444
00:18:16,929 --> 00:18:20,516
My name's also Diane
but with a hard E.
445
00:18:20,599 --> 00:18:23,393
Dian-ee.
[ Laughs ]
446
00:18:23,477 --> 00:18:26,772
Gillian.
Gillianianiana.
447
00:18:26,855 --> 00:18:30,025
You have got to get
your flat ass out here.
448
00:18:30,108 --> 00:18:33,320
So, Charlie has this little
thing she does every 19 --
449
00:18:33,403 --> 00:18:36,198
The Rejuvication!
What year is this?!
450
00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:37,533
1991!
451
00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:39,243
Since you're clearly
up to speed --
452
00:18:39,326 --> 00:18:40,619
the skin sack's escaped.
453
00:18:40,702 --> 00:18:43,455
Oh. My. God.
454
00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:44,957
Birdsteam?
455
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:47,084
No.
Go!
456
00:18:47,167 --> 00:18:48,752
[ Siren wailing ]
457
00:18:48,836 --> 00:18:54,591
♪♪
458
00:18:54,675 --> 00:18:57,219
Oh, God.
[ Panting raggedly ]
459
00:18:57,302 --> 00:19:00,138
I didn't know how much
I needed fellowship,
460
00:19:00,222 --> 00:19:02,641
but now I can't
live without it.
461
00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:05,561
You'll never be one of us,
but you're all right.
462
00:19:05,644 --> 00:19:06,895
He's not all right!
463
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:09,147
He swallowed the keys,
and we're all gonna die!
464
00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:11,233
What's this?
A secret exit.
465
00:19:11,316 --> 00:19:13,026
This wasn't
worth mentioning?!
466
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:15,237
Then it wouldn't be secret,
would it, Marty?
467
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:18,282
It's Hugh, Brian.
I was your best man.
468
00:19:18,365 --> 00:19:20,325
♪♪
469
00:19:20,409 --> 00:19:22,077
Charlie: Stop!
470
00:19:24,496 --> 00:19:25,747
It's close.
471
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:27,207
She can sense it.
472
00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:29,293
No, Gillian, I have a nose.
473
00:19:29,376 --> 00:19:31,587
It smells like pork rinds
and gooch.
474
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:32,796
[ Growl ]
475
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:35,424
-Scarlie?
-Aah!
476
00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:38,093
-Scarlie, no!
-Help me!
477
00:19:38,176 --> 00:19:39,887
No!
It's too late.
478
00:19:39,970 --> 00:19:41,430
-Bad Scarlie.
-He's gone.
479
00:19:41,513 --> 00:19:43,265
-Help me!
-Scarlie!
480
00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:45,142
Nothing to do now
but watch.
481
00:19:45,225 --> 00:19:48,353
CJ: There are so many things
besides watch that you could do!
482
00:19:48,437 --> 00:19:49,771
He's with
the chickens now.
483
00:19:49,855 --> 00:19:51,148
Charlie:
A little help?
484
00:19:51,231 --> 00:19:53,233
Any kind of disinfectant!
485
00:19:53,317 --> 00:19:54,860
[ Siren wails ]
486
00:19:57,821 --> 00:20:00,032
Paul: Two-day road trip
with the bros!
487
00:20:00,115 --> 00:20:01,450
I'll get my clothes back on.
488
00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,452
Meredith: Hey, kid,
make yourself useful
489
00:20:03,535 --> 00:20:05,120
and give me a piggyback.
490
00:20:05,203 --> 00:20:09,291
Charlie: Scarlie, don't run!
491
00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:11,501
Scarlie.
492
00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:13,378
We're not going to hurt you.
493
00:20:13,462 --> 00:20:15,672
[ Grunting ]
494
00:20:15,756 --> 00:20:18,759
Come here, pretty girl.
495
00:20:18,842 --> 00:20:20,969
Yeah, Mamma's got you.
496
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:22,763
Come on.
Come on.
497
00:20:25,766 --> 00:20:27,434
There you go.
498
00:20:27,517 --> 00:20:30,854
♪♪
499
00:20:30,938 --> 00:20:32,481
Birdcat, bad!
500
00:20:32,564 --> 00:20:35,442
♪♪
501
00:20:35,525 --> 00:20:37,861
Two Charlies,
can't tell who's who.
502
00:20:37,945 --> 00:20:39,863
Are you fucking
kidding me?
503
00:20:39,947 --> 00:20:41,657
You're such
a lightweight.
504
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,659
That's obviously
Charlie.
505
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,494
Take the shot!
506
00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:51,250
♪♪
507
00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,543
-I've got this!
-No, I've got this.
508
00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:55,963
I'm her attendant!
509
00:20:57,673 --> 00:20:58,966
[ Gasps ]
510
00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:01,468
[ Grunting ]
511
00:21:07,808 --> 00:21:10,686
Charles!
My love!
512
00:21:10,769 --> 00:21:12,187
[ Gasping ]
513
00:21:12,270 --> 00:21:14,356
I always have so much anxiety
with driving,
514
00:21:14,439 --> 00:21:16,942
but this is like driving
with mama.
515
00:21:17,025 --> 00:21:18,694
Aah!
516
00:21:18,777 --> 00:21:21,363
I can't believe I'm going to
have to wait another
517
00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:23,365
19 years to rebirth.
518
00:21:23,448 --> 00:21:26,159
Looks like someone
needs a piggyback.
519
00:21:26,243 --> 00:21:28,537
-Moment's passed, Cade.
-Bye.
520
00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:30,455
Gillian! Ohh!
521
00:21:30,539 --> 00:21:32,124
Where is she?
522
00:21:32,207 --> 00:21:35,127
A gift.
For your pretzel hands.
523
00:21:35,210 --> 00:21:36,545
So people won't stare.
524
00:21:36,628 --> 00:21:37,838
Stay with me.
525
00:21:37,921 --> 00:21:40,549
Think of what we could do
in 19 years.
526
00:21:40,632 --> 00:21:42,217
No.
I shan't.
527
00:21:42,300 --> 00:21:45,137
We've both sworn fealty
to a higher power.
528
00:21:45,220 --> 00:21:48,056
Plus, you'll be like 80?
529
00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:49,599
Gillian!
530
00:21:49,683 --> 00:21:51,518
It's life calling.
531
00:21:51,601 --> 00:21:54,855
I'll see you in 19 years.
532
00:21:54,938 --> 00:21:55,981
Yes.
533
00:21:56,064 --> 00:21:57,607
Unless, like, I'm married,
534
00:21:57,691 --> 00:22:01,278
then it probably
wouldn't be appropriate.
535
00:22:01,361 --> 00:22:02,821
Birdgirl: Gillian!
536
00:22:02,904 --> 00:22:04,823
I've got a hangover.
537
00:22:04,906 --> 00:22:06,658
[ Rapping ] ♪ Who is the girl
that saves the world? ♪
538
00:22:06,742 --> 00:22:08,368
Hey! Birdgirl!
539
00:22:08,452 --> 00:22:09,911
♪ Wings of fire,
unique like pearls ♪
540
00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:11,580
Hey! Birdgirl!
541
00:22:11,663 --> 00:22:13,498
♪ Who's the one
they can't defeat? ♪
542
00:22:13,582 --> 00:22:14,958
Hey! Birdgirl!
543
00:22:15,042 --> 00:22:16,710
♪ Ultra fierce,
and it's all you need ♪
544
00:22:16,793 --> 00:22:19,963
Hey! Birdgirl!
545
00:22:20,047 --> 00:22:21,715
Hey!
[ Imitating fanfare ]
Hey!
[ Imitating fanfare ]
546
00:22:21,798 --> 00:22:23,508
Birdgirl!
547
00:22:24,843 --> 00:22:27,929
Made in Georgia.
36409
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