All language subtitles for The.Long.Long.Trailer.1954.HDTV.1080p.AC3.x264.eng

[instrumental music]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

[dramatic music]

Tacy! Tacy, open the door!

Tacy! It's me!
Nicky! Are you here?

Tacy!

Tacy!

Tacy! Ta..

[music continues]

Are you the manager?

Why, no. The manager--

Where is he, do you know?

Well, that's hard to say.

It seems a little girl in one
of the trailers lost her cat.

He's out trying to find it.
Is there anything I can do?

No, I'm just looking
for some other people.

Well, you better wait inside.
You won't miss anyone.

They've all got
to pass right here.

It's real rainy, isn't it?

- Yeah.
- Like this to read?

I get a great kick
out of these trailer magazines.

- Don't let me disturb you.
- Oh, that's alright.

- You a trailerite?
- Yeah.

Looks like
I'm gonna be one too.

[chuckles]
I had a time
persuading my wife.

She was dead set against it.

Says it's too late
in life for us

to start bein' gypsies

but we've been looking
at one tonight.

'A young lady wants to sell'

'and I think
it's done the trick.'

'The two of 'em
are back at the house now'

'measuring
will the deepfreeze fit in.'

You know, my wife won't move
without that deepfreeze.

Say, what kind of a motor
is the New Moon?

- 'Would you know?'
- Rig.

You wanna sound like
an old-timer, you call it a rig.

- 'Rig?'
- The New Moon's fine.

Well, this one's
practically new.

The young lady says it's only
gone some 7000 miles.

Is that so?

'She feels terrible
about selling it.'

But her plans changed.

She has to go back
to her family.

- You been married long?
- Thirty-one years.

You get along alright?

No fights? No battles?

- Why, no.
- Then don't buy a trailer.

I'm telling you,
don't buy a trailer.

That young lady with the
trailer, that's my wife.

My wife! I've been looking
for her for three days.

I've been to the police, I've
been to the highway patrol.

I must've gone
to a 100 trailer parks.

Everything I own
is in that trailer.

I haven't got a clean shirt!

I haven't got
a change of clothes!

That's what can happen
when you buy a trailer.

I'm telling you,
it's a fine thing

when you come home to your home
and your home is gone.

If you told me two months ago

that I'd be fool enough
to buy a trailer..

...I would have told you
you were crazy.

Absolutely out of your mind!

They were a joke to me!

A great big joke!

[laughs]

A trailer!

[laughs]
Oh, Tacy.

Oh, that's very funny, honey.

[laughing]

The Collinis are home.
Please drop in for cocktails.

You'll find us someplace
along the Lincoln Highway.

Or better yet,
stay where you are

we'll bring our house to you.

[laughing continues]

Hey, you know,
you could get a tambourine

and I'll get a dancing bear,
and we could clean up. Ha-ha..

Honey.

You're crying.

Did I say something wrong?

Did I say something
to offend you?

[crying]
No. I don't blame you
for laughing.

It's a ridiculous idea.

But then I guess
I'm pretty ridiculous myself.

Thank heaven you found it out

before you made the horrible
mistake of marrying me.

Oh, honey what on Earth
are you talking about?

I'm just a figure of fun,
a clown.

Oh, now, come on, Tacy,
sweetheart

let's get this thing
straightened out right now.

Now, now, look at me, Tacy.

I wouldn't make
fun of you ever.

I'm the fellow
who loves you, remember?

But what is this about
a trailer?

You mean, you were seriously
thinkin' of--

All I was thinking of was making
a home for my husband.

A little place
we could call our own

where I could take care of him

cook for him

and make him comfortable.

If that's a horrible offense

if that makes me a criminal,
then I'm terribly sorry.

I apologize.
I withdraw the whole idea.

Honey, can we talk
this over calmly?

We'll have a home, darling.

What kind of a home

when your work takes you
all those places?

- Colorado, Montana--
- Alright, then.

Alright,
we won't go to Colorado.

- I'll get another job.
- Oh, no. I didn't mean that.

This is a wonderful chance
for you.

Anyway, it'll always
be something like that.

If it isn't a tunnel
in Colorado

it'll be a bridge
in Alaska

or a dam across the Pacific.

- Something off somewhere.
- I didn't know that you felt..

We'll always be living
out of suitcases

and using
other people's things.

Living in some stale
little hotel

or some grubby furnished room.

But don't you see?

If we had a trailer,
no matter where we went

I could make a home for you.

And when the job was over,
we could just hitch up our house

and go on to the next.

N-now, look, honey.
Now, let's get down to facts.

First.. First of all,
th-the kind of a trailer

that you're thinking about
probably cost a fortune.

Now, you know what our budget
is for the first year.

"Travel, honeymoon.."
Here it is, rent.

- I know, $1700. Alright.
- We--

Now, for only $100 more

do you know what we could have?

Have you any conception?

We could have this
beautiful home.

Only $1800

and that's complete,
mind you.

Everything is included.
All this furniture.

'Chairs, sofa, bed, stove'

refrigerator, shower bath,
everything.

Absolutely everything,
right down to

coat hangers in the closet.

You don't have to buy a thing.

Did you ever see anything
as beautiful?

Well, it's kind of roomy
at that though.

- Wonderful closet space.
- Where?

That's the living room.

[laughs]
Oh. Well, it-it's convenient.

E-everything is right there
within easy--

You know, Nicky

what I was thinking about
most of all was our honeymoon.

Can't you just imagine
what it would be like?

You know, some of the most
beautiful country in the world

is between here and Colorado.

The whole trip
would be just like a dream.

We'd go where we pleased,
when we pleased.

If we saw a beautiful spot
beside a brook

or a mountain lake,
a lovely wood

we'd stop there
and we'd be all alone.

It'd all be for us.

The moonlight and the sunsets

and the sound
of the tree toads far off..

[upbeat music]

(Nicholas)
The night
the trailer show opened

there was no holding Tacy.

Pardon me, but could you tell me
where the Bungalette trailer is?

Bungalette, uh..

Oh, this is it, right here.

Well, thank you.

[music continues]

It's alright.

You know, we could put some
built-in gun racks right here.

We need some space.

- Both sides.
- I don't know.

[indistinct chatter]

Oh, excuse me, chum,
I, I thought my cap might..

Excuse me, I..

Pardon me, I wanna, I wanna get
my cap over here, lady, please.

- Excuse me.
- Oh..

- I'm so sorry.
- It's alright.

[indistinct chatter]

Pardon me, please. Pardon me.

[indistinct chatter]

Oh, I'm so disappointed
I could cry.

It looked enormous in the ads.

It was such a wonderful idea.

Well, don't worry, sweetheart.
We'll have a home.

We'll just have to wait a while,
that's all.

And then we saw...it.

[music continues]

- Isn't it a beauty?
- Yeah, it's big, alright.

Let's look inside,
just for fun.

Now, Tacy, that thing must cost
a million dollars, at least.

Oh, I didn't mean
we'd ever think of buying it.

[laughs]
I know we could never do that.

But as long as we're here,
let's just look inside.

Come on, darling.

[mellow music]

[indistinct chatter]

Oh..

What happened, darling?

Nothin', I just cracked
my skull, that's all.

[instrumental music]

Isn't it lovely?

So new, and fresh, and pretty.

[indistinct chatter]

[gasps]

Oh, look, glass in the oven.

So you don't have to open it
to look in.

Come on, honey,
let's look back here. Come on.

[music continues]

Did you see
this wonderful shower, honey?

Could I, uh, show you some
of the features of our--

Uh, no, no, no,
we're just looking. Thank you.

- No?
- Thank you. It's just the same.

Did you see
the linen closet?

- Yes, fine and..
- Oh!

Oh, Nicky.
Oh, honey, be careful.

What's that step doin' there?

[chuckles]
That's a sunken living room.

It's just like
a lovely little house.

Oh, Nicky, isn't it wonderful?

You couldn't ask for anything
more than this, could you?

I'm gonna ask the salesman
how much it is.

- Now, Tacy--
- Just for fun.

Oh, pardon me. Heh.

Uh, I, um..

I-I know we couldn't
possibly afford it

but could you tell me the price
of this trailer, please?

Yes. It's, uh, $5345.

Oh, I was afraid
of something like that.

Of course, you wouldn't
have to pay that all at once.

All you'd have to do
is put down a third.

Hm. Thank you very much.

[music continues]

That's $1750, isn't it?

- Uh, approximately, yes.
- Thank you.

Did you hear that, Nicky? 1750.

That's $50 less than the one
we can't even stand up in.

It couldn't possibly be 1750.

That must be what you give him
for the down payment.

That's what I say, 1750.

Oh, let's get it, Nicky,
please.

- What?
- I'll save, I, I promise.

I-I won't spend a cent

on anything again
as long as I live.

Only I just wanna have this
for our home.

Honey, we could do it,
couldn't we?

We wouldn't have to pay
any rent.

I'll cook all of our meals.

Honest, I will. We won't have to
go to any restaurants or hotels

and, honey,
there won't be any bellboys

to bother us and no tips.

and well, just think of the
money that we could save

on our, on our honeymoon alone.

Ten minutes later,
I started savin' it.

And, uh, $160 for state tax

and $73 for registration,
license fee

and payment on the insurance.

That makes a grand total
of $1932.22. Ahem.

- And 22 cents?
- That's right.

Ever, uh,
hauled a house trailer before?

- Heh. No, we've never--
- Well..

If I were you
I'd have a professional

haul it for you to Colorado.

Oh, no. That's gonna be
half the fun.

Oh?

You're gonna, uh,
haul it yourself, huh?

Mm-hm.

Uh, maybe I'd better
take a look at your car.

[instrumental music]

My car?

Better get a heavier car.

It'd be a big saving
in the end.

[whirring]

Let's see. We're allowing you
$400 for your old car.

And that plus 900 cash

it makes 1300 as down payment.

Okay?

Look, are you sure

that this car is heavy enough
to pull a trailer?

Absolutely.

Of course, you're going
to have to have a hitch

welded to the bottom
of your car.

A hitch, huh?
How much would that cost?

Oh, we don't do that here.

You'll have to go to an expert.

I see. Where am I gonna find
an expert?

Excelsior Trailer Repair.

They're the best people
in town.

We now had a new car

a new trailer

and mortgages of $7646.

We don't just weld the hitch
to your car here

we bolt it on in three places

the forward member, the rear
member, under your bumper.

Hey, Joe, here. Here it is.
Bring it over here.

You're getting the best hitch
in the market today.

This is the Atwood ball.

It engages securely
to the socket

in the slip dolly
which prevents a lot of--

Just a minute. Slip dolly?

Oh, sure, sure.
Come here. Here.

[indistinct chatter]

Now, this is the B6
four-wheel model.

It's $170 extra plus tax,
but it's worth it.

- It takes the weight of--
- Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Do I have to have
one of these things?

Cripes! Why, you can't afford
to be without that.

It was a question
who'd give out first

me or the money.

Block and tackle, just in case.

- In case of what?
- Just in case.

Uh, that'll be fine now.

Okay, the little lady said
she wanted the car

dropped off at her house.

Come on, I don't know,

sometimes you don't know
what you're gonna do

with these things.
Try to figure them out..

Oh, no. You drive.

- Who, me?
- Sure, sure. Move over.

Nothing to it.

Now, these
are your trailer brakes.

The most important thing
to remember is

when you gonna stop, you put
your trailer brakes on first

or you'll jackknife.

- Jackknife?
- Yeah.

You know, trailer
and car like this.

Saw it happen
on a hill over here.

The trailer tipped over,
took the car

right down the canyon after it.

So remember,
trailer brakes first.

Trailer brakes first.

These are your trailer
blinker lights.

When you're gonna turn left and
when you're gonna turn right.

There's your stop light.
Now put your blinker lights on.

Left. Right.
Trailer brakes. Car brakes.

Lights. Left. Right.
Trailer brakes. Car brakes.

Okay, let's go.
Ignition. Start it.

Take your brake off,
put it in low, and go, boy!

We were movin',
I couldn't be sure

whether I was pullin' it
or it was pushing me.

You'll get the hang of it.

Just remember to allow
for that extra length

behind you when you turn.

Always think of it
as a train behind you.

Forty feet of train.

[engine rumbling]

Those trailer brakes
are your best friends.

You take care of them
and they'll take care of you.

They're electric brakes

actuated by a magnet which
is connected to the brake pad.

This magnet is always in contact
with the armature.

The armature is in contact

with the brake drum and revolves
with the wheel. Red light.

- Red light! Trailer brake!
- Huh!

Look, just keep repeating
to yourself

"Trailer brakes first

trailer brakes first."
Make it your motto.

- Trailer brakes first.
- Okay. Green light. Go, boy.

[engine rumbling]

Don't get nervous.
You'll get the hang of it.

Get into the left-hand lane.

Ease her over a little more.

Put out your arm.

No, not your head, your arm!

- Look out for the truck!'
- Huh!

- Trailer brake!
- Huh!

[brakes screeching]

Always remember

trailer brakes first!

Trailer brakes first!

A few days before the weddin'

the trailer was being packed
under Tacy's calm supervision.

[all clamoring]

I was still
in a state of shock.

I couldn't get those trailer
brakes out of my mind.

- Oops. Oh, Nicky!
- Ugh!

[laughs]
You poor lamb!

You're not gonna be able to get
those things in there, dear.

You're just gonna have to strip
down to the bare essentials.

What do we do with these, Tacy?

Oh, put them in the blanket
closet in there.

- Well, here I am.
- Oh, hi, darling.

Well, honey, put 'em
under the bed or something.

Oh, well, you find some
place to put 'em.

I can't find a place to put..

We're gonna need a trailer
for the trailer.

Tacy, what shall I do with these
towels marked "His?"

Put 'em over here
with the ones marked "Hers."

- Tacy!
- What?

That thing can't ride there.
That's dangerous.

Now, just relax, dear.

I had Mr. Jackson
make a little wedge.

- And it's perfectly in place.
- Tacy, What about these boxes?

They've gotta make sure
there's nothing in--

Excuse me, dear.
Excuse me, Nick.

That's okay. Uh, excuse me.

[indistinct chatter]

- 'Tacy! Tacy!'
- What?

- Come here, quick!
- What's the matter?

[indistinct chatter]

This is a madhouse!

[clattering]

(male #1)
Trailer brakes!

Red light! Green light!

Trailer brakes! Red light!

Ah!

[brakes screeching]

[vehicle crashing]

What happened? Huh!

Oh, honey, what did you do?

I had everything arranged.

Look, do we have to have
all of this stuff?

Of course, dear.

Wouldn't one casserole
be enough?

One casserole?

For souffles, for sauces,
for pot roast?

Really, dear, I need everything
that I have here.

You know you just can't set up
housekeeping and expect--

Just forget that I said
anything, I-I don't wanna

argue today.
I'm a little nervous.

Nicky, are you still holding
those, dear?

Put them in the bedroom closet.

No, honey, you gonna be.. You go
to the closet in the hall.

I have saved it just for you.
Right in there.

Every one of them
and I wanna make sure--

- In the dresser.
- Oh, all of that. Let me..

[laughing]

Geraldine, which closet
did Tacy tell me to take?

Tacy, which closet
did you have saved for Nicky?

Tacy, I can't find
the other set of linens.

On top of that big silver box.

Honey, I told you
the hall closet.

Well, the hall closet
is full of your things.

Oh, oh, oh, well, put your
things there temporarily.

Come on, Sarah, we gotta
shift this thing around.

I've gotta change everything.

[indistinct chatter]

(male #1)
Trailer brakes! Red light!

Green light! Trailer brakes!
Red light!

[screaming]

[brakes screeching]

[explosion]

Tacy, I know
what the trouble is.

They sent two sets of towels.

Oh, no, that means two sets
of linen, two sets of towels

two sets of everything!

[all clamoring]

What did I tell you?
I told you that!

And then for a while

I forgot all about the trailer.

[indistinct chatter]

Thank you. Oh!

Oh, the stuff went every
which way that I was coming in.

[laughing]

[indistinct chatter]

[instrumental music]

[all cheering]

Goodbye!

[all clamoring]

Oh, my baby!

- I can't see.
- Let's get out of here.

And don't catch cold at night.

- It's gets so cold.
- What's the matter?

There's somethin' wrong
with the..

[all clamoring]

Bye, everyone!

For heaven's sake, Nicky,
come on. Let's get outta here.

This keeps dyin' off.
I don't..

[all clamoring]

The brakes are on,
the brakes are on!

No, they're not,
this ain't a trailer brakes..

Rear brakes!

[all clamoring]

Come on.

[instrumental music]

[cars honking]

Can't we go any faster?

I guess we can,
but I'm afraid to.

- Why?
- It scares me.

It scares you? Why?

I don't know why.
It just scares me, that's all.

[cars honking]

[laughing]
Yeah, may all your troubles
be little ones!

[laughs]

- Who was that?
- How should I know?

[laughs]

What's the matter
with everybody?

- What are they yelling at?
- I don't know.

Oh, they must have
put a sign on the back.

Oh, for heaven's sake.

Well, then, stop.
Stop and take it off.

You can't stop one of these
things in the highway.

- Well, can't you pull over?
- There is no place to pull.

[car honking]

Oh, I can't stand it, Nicky.
Please, stop.

Look, you talk
as if this was a car.

This is a freight train.
Forty feet of train.

[cars honking]

- There's a place to stop.
- I can't stop on a curve.

[cars honking]

[all clamoring]

[whistles]

[whistles]

- Watch out for the red light.
- I know. I know.

Well, watch out!
You're going through it!

- Well, I can't help..
- Stop! What's the matter?

It won't stop! I don't know
what's the matter.

- Watch out.
- Oh, trailer brake!

[tires screeching]

[cars honking]

[whistling]

[tires screeching]

Everybody's looking at it.

[engine rumbling]

Oh, no, honey, watch it.

[brakes screeching]

- What's the matter?
- I don't know.

Thank you so very much.

[whistles]

Tacy, will you get the map

out of the
glove compartment, please?

Yep.

I gotta turn here somewhere
if I remember right.

We've got to get
on Highway 101.

- Find the right map?
- Yep, I got it.

Oh, they print these things
all upside down.

- Can you see it?
- Yeah, here it is.

Oh, be sure to tell me
when we get there, will ya?

Turn right here!

No, no, no! What are you doing?

(Nicholas)
'I'm turnin' right!'

(Tacy)
'But you're going
the wrong way.'

You should've been
on that road back there

the one that turned left.

[brakes screeching]

You told me to turn right.

I didn't tell you
to turn right.

You said, "Turn right here,"
and I turned right.

You didn't let me finish.

I was trying to tell you
to turn left.

What I was trying to say is,
you turn right here, left.

- "You turn right here, left?"
- Exactly.

Have you any conception

how much room it takes
to turn this thin' around?

We may have to go on
for miles and miles.

[instrumental music]

Well, only a couple of more
miles and we'll be there.

Wait till you see
what I have for your dinner.

Don't tell me you're gonna try
to cook dinner.

I certainly am.
I've got it all planned.

First, you're gonna take
your shower and by the time

you've finished,
I'll have dinner all ready.

Oh, Nicky,
won't it be wonderful?

Our first dinner
in our own little home.

- Hey!
- What? What happened?

I almost forgot.

I didn't give you
your wedding present yet.

[laughs]
Oh.

Look there in the
glove compartment.

- The envelope.
- Oh.

"Mrs. Nicholas Collini."

- Oh, honey.
- Go on, look inside.

What is it?

Well, I always read
where you put the house

in your wife's name,
so there you are.

- The trailer is yours.
- Oh, Nicky!

Oh, honey! Oh, baby!
Thank you.

Oh, that's just wonderful.

[instrumental music]

[music continues]

[indistinct chatter]

[brakes screeching]

- "Mr. And Mrs. Collini?"
- That's right.

Well, now. Welcome
to Breezeway Trailer Park.

I have your space
waiting for you.

You don't have
to do a thing.

Just step inside and register.

I'll horse your rigging
and get you all hooked up.

- Oh, thanks.
- You're quite welcome.

[instrumental music]

(woman on PA)
'Mr. Lawfield, lot 33'

'call your mother
at her home.'

'Mrs. Morley, lot 12'

'special delivery for you
at the park office.'

'Mr. Carmel, lot 21'

'we have a package for you.'

[indistinct chatter]

[instrumental music]

- Anything wrong?
- Wrong?

- I-I mean the missus.
- Oh, uh..

Uh, sh-sh-she turned her ankle.

- Oh.
- On that concrete block, I bet.

Well, you poor darling,
but don't worry

I know just what to do.

Bring me a pail of hot water

and that bag of Epsom salts.

- Here, let me help.
- Oh, please.

I can manage alright. I-I--

You can't get her
through that way.

Well, please let me down.
I can walk these few steps.

Oh, you'll do nothing of the
sort. Here give me her feet.

I know just how
to manage this.

- Is someone hurt?
- Broke her ankle.

Oh, isn't that too bad?

This is Miss Dudley.

She's the big Airway Vagabond
next door.

- How do you do?
- How do you do, Mrs. Vagabond?

Uh, now, e-easy does it.
Easy does it there.

[grunting]

'Look out. Low bridge.'

Where do you want her?
On the bed?

Oh, please, I, I feel fine.
Really, I do.

Uh, gentle there. Gentle,
gentle now. Don't hurt her.

There we are. Which one is it?

- Uh, uh, the left.
- Uh, the right.

- Oh, yeah, the left, the left.
- 'Emma!'

We're out of Epsom salts

but the lady in the Zimmer 36
is bringing some.

We've got to get you
off your foot.

Now, my girl, you come right
back here, I'll fix you up.

- Come in, Maude.
- I brought the Epsom salts.

Uh, ladies,
this is Miss Barrett.

- Hello.
- I'm Nick Collini.

- Mrs. Collini.
- How do you do?

Oh, I'm certainly pleased
to meet you.

Oh, golly,
what a beautiful rig this is.

[gasps]
Will you look at these drapes--

Oh, not right now, Maude.

We've got to make this
little girl comfortable.

'Now, here, Miss Dudley,
you take that arm.'

Maude, you take that one.

Now, easy, easy.
Don't let her step on it.

Take it easy. Easy, girls.
Now, watch that step.

'Watch, watch that step!
Watch it, watch it!'

'Give me it! Give me that.'

- I got the hot water.
- Oh.

Oh, Mrs. Hittaway
is a wonder.

Uh, any sickness or trouble

why, she's there before
the doctor.

[indistinct chatter]

Hey, I hear
you had a nasty accident.

Oh, it was really nothin',
nothin' at all.

Well, how about seeing a doctor?
We got a dandy doctor on row 3.

Oh, no. Really, it's not
necessary. Thank you.

- You're very kind.
- Call me if you need--

Those kids haven't had
a bite of supper.

Suppose, you run over
and bring the casserole.

Do her good
to have some munchables.

Oh, we wouldn't think of it,
really.

You go right ahead, Joe.

I'd like to know
what a trailerite's good for

if it's not to help
another trailerite!

[instrumental music]

[laughing]

- What did you say?
- I say, you towed her far?

No, we haven't been traveling
very much lately.

- Nice rig, very good rig.
- Thank you.

I'm a Kozy-Coach man myself.

That's a good rig too.
Towed her over 7000 miles.

Well, that's not saying that
this isn't a good rig too.

- It is.
- Thank you. Thank you.

Excuse me, please. Excuse me.

- Here you are, sir.
- Mr. Collini. Do you mind?

I want the husband and kids
to see this.

- Sure.
- Now, this is my husband Carl.

- And this is Nick Collini.
- How are you?

Oh, look at it, darling!
Look at this!

Is this really living?

You know, next year,
we're gonna trade in our

Airway Zephyr
and get one of the new ones.

Well, I lived in a house
in town for 15 years.

I never did get to know
some of my neighbors

even after 15 years

but in a trailer park, you get
to know everyone right off.

Yeah, you certainly do.

- Is my wife here?
- Here I am, baby.

I've been looking
all over for you.

Oh, Nicky, I want you
to meet my husband.

- How you do?
- Pop?

- That's all I got left, pop.
- No, just plain water.

[all clamoring]

Folks, do you know
what time it is? 11:30.

[all clamoring]

I'm sorry.

- Outside.
- Thank you. Good night.

Oh, well, well, well.

[all clamoring]

That's the fine thing
about trailer life.

Everybody bobs up
at one place or another.

You know, why, there were some
people we met in Miami--

Save it, Joe! Here, take this.

Now don't worry
about your new wife.

She's gonna be right as rain
in the morning.

She don't know that,
but I gave her a sleeping pill.

Bye now.

[instrumental music]

(woman on PA)
'Mrs. Jack Wood, lot 15.'

'Please call your children.'

[children clamoring]

Huh!

Whoa!

(woman on PA)
'Mrs. Jack Wood, lot 15.'

'Please call your children.'

'They are running wild
in the park flowerbed.'

[children clamoring]

'Mr. Lawfield, lot 33.
Call your mother at her--'

Well, don't tell me
you finally decided to wake up.

- Oh, good morning, darling.
- Good morning.

What happened? I haven't slept
like that in my life.

What did they put
in that footbath?

Well, Mrs. Hittaway decided that
it would be a wonderful idea

to give you a sleeping pill.

- A sleeping pi.. Oh, fine.
- Ha-ha.

(woman on PA)
'Mr. Lawfield, lot 33.'
'Call your mother--'

- Noisy here, isn't it?
- Yeah, it sure is.

We better get out of here before
the next delegation comes in.

You know, Nicky,
we don't have to stay

in these trailer parks.

We can go anywhere we want to.
We've got wheels.

Why don't we just go along
until we find a nice place

and just stop there
and stay as long as we like?

Well, you won't have
no electricity, no refrigerator.

- No lights, no heater.
- I don't care.

You won't have any hot
and cold running water.

I don't care.

We got gas to cook by.
That's all that matters.

Oh, Nicky, let's do it.

It would just be wonderful.

Some lovely spot in the forest,
just you and me all alone.

- You know something?
- Hm?

- It sounds wonderful to me.
- Me too.

[instrumental music]

Oh, there's a nice little
forest road.

Mm. Yeah.

[instrumental music]

[clatters]

[thunder rumbling]

[engine revving]

Oh, Nicky. It's all my fault.

Oh, now, don't be crazy.
I was the one.

I should have known better.

What are we gonna do?

Well, we'll take the car
and go into town

and in the morning I'll
come back, uh, with a tow car.

You mean,
just go away and leave it?

- Leave our trailer?
- Certainly.

Oh, no, no. I couldn't do that.
I just couldn't.

Well, nobody will go by here.
This is an old logging road.

I can't go away and leave
this beautiful new trailer

with all of our wedding
presents in it and our clothes.

Well, why can't we stay here?

Why can't we stay here
all night?

Oh, Nicky, please?

- Oh. Okay.
- Give me the keys.

Now you turn on the gas and I'll
have dinner before you know it.

Gas.

[thunder rumbling]

"For overnight parkin'

"select an attractive
trailer park.

"The park attendant will help
you get your coach in position

"and as soon as utilities
are attached to coach

"you can turn on the
refrigerator

"and the water heater

shop for food and start eating."

(Tacy)
'Nicky, I can't open the door.'

I can't get it open. The other
one doesn't work either.

Well, let me try it.

Oh, Nicky,
it's starting to rain.

Naturally.

[thunder rumbling]

[screams]
No, no, no! Now, don't hurt it.

- Don't hurt it?
- No.

- Get the flashlight, will you?
- Okay.

[grunts]

[instrumental music]

Oh, good. You got it open.

[grunts]

I won't try to unpack.

I'll just get out
what we need for dinner.

Okay.

Ugh! Ugh!

You know, it's a good thing we
didn't have dinner last night.

Now, I have everything
in the casserole.

[grunts]
Pull.

And all I have to do is
ugh, heat it up.

- Oh.
- Oh, dear!

Oh, well, don't worry,
I'll fix something, honey.

Here's your favorite cheese

and, and,
I'll, I'll fix some eggs

and make some nice hot coffee.

[rain splattering]

I'll go outside and..

...get the jack and try to
level this thing up a little.

- Alright.
- Oh!

- I'm sorry, honey.
- That's alright, dear.

While you're out there,
will you turn on the gas?

Okay.

[clatters]

[thunder rumbling]

[rain splattering]

[thunder rumbling]

- Okay?
- Oh, just a minute.

Okay.

[rain splattering]

[grunts]

[thunder rumbling]

[clatters]

[rain splattering]

[rain splattering]

[speaking in foreign language]

[laughs]
Yes, sir.

Now for the pice de resistance!

- Isn't this fun, honey?
- Uh-huh.

What more can you ask?

A hunk of cheese

jug of wine

and thou beside me
in the wilderness.

- Beside me where?
- In the wilderness.

[laughs]
"In the wilderness."

- Take a straw.
- Thanks.

[rain splattering]

[sighs]

Here.

Nicky, you know what made me
fall in love with you?

Because of the way
I drive a trailer?

[chuckles]

My velvety eyes?

My elegant nose?

No, it was the first time
I ever saw you.

It was at the celebration
for the opening

of the new freeway, remember?

We were all at the beach

and you never looked at me.

- I did too.
- Mm-hmm.

You were being very gay,
making a pass at some girl

and suddenly I noticed
that one of the buttons

was off the front of your shirt.

And I just wanted to cry,
I felt so sorry for you.

I thought of you living
all alone in hotels

and boarding houses
in strange cities

and no one to sew
your buttons on.

Right then, I made up my mind
that I was going to marry you.

I was gonna marry you
and take care of you.

That's nice.

I was going
to take care of you.

Now look what I've done.

[rain splattering]

Nicky?

What are you thinking about?

Hmm?

What are you thinking about?

I was wondering
how the heck they're gonna

get this trailer out of here.

Oh.

[thunder rumbling]

Hi.

I'll have your bed ready
in a minute.

[chuckles]
Sleepy boy.

Honey, don't you love the sound
of the rain on the roof?

Oh.

Poor little baby.

You've had a busy day,
haven't you?

[thunder rumbling]

[rain splattering]

[thunder rumbling]

[screams]

What's the matter, honey?
Can't you sleep?

Oh, now, let's see.
Tow car, $20.

Uh, two men,
three hours, 21.50.

Washing car and trailer,
$5. Total, 46.50.

Let's call it an even 46.

Well, that's very kind of you.
There you are.

- Thank you and call again.
- You're welcome.

Thank you, sir.

Was it terribly expensive?

No more than if we had
a suite at the Waldorf.

Oh, dear.

Well, never mind,
we won't be spending any money

for a week now visiting
Aunt Anastacia in Bridgewood.

Thank heavens.

[engine revving]

Now, this is my father's side
of the family.

His two sisters,
Aunt Anastacia and Aunt Ellen.

She lives two houses down.

Uh, uh, don't forget to thank
her for her wedding present.

Uh, she's the one
that gave us the luggage

that we couldn't take back
because it was monogrammed.

- Oh, yeah.
- Let's see.

And Aunt Anastacia, of course.

She hasn't given us
our present yet.

She said
it's gonna be a check

and I'm her namesake,
so it should be a nice fat one.

Hundred dollars at least.

- Well, I married an heiress.
- Oh, pooh.

Let's see and then there's
the twins, Dottie and Kay.

You met them at the wedding,
and the boys and..

Oh, yes. Poor Grace.

Poor Grace?

She's Aunt Anastacia's
daughter.

Oh, yeah, and I almost forgot
Uncle Edgar.

Oh, there it is.
There's the house.

There they are. Hi.

(Edgar)
Hey, Tacy.

[laughing]

Hi, honey.

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, darling.

[indistinct chatter]

Aunt Ellen!

Oh, and, Grace.

How nice to see you, dear.

[gasps]
Oh, and the twins.

Look how they've grown!
I just wouldn't know you.

Dottie? Oh, I'm wrong.

- Oh, Tommy.
- Oh, darling.

How wonderful to be here,
I just can't tell..

And this.

And this is Nicky.

- Aunt Anastacia.
- How do you do?

- And Uncle Edgar.
- Nicholas.

And this is Aunt Ellen.

- Oh. How do you do?
- And my Uncle Bill.

- How are you?
- And Aunt Ellen's family.

Dottie and Kay, the twins.
You met them at the wedding.

- I never can tell them apart.
- Oh, yes.

- And this is Jody.
- Joe.

Oh, Joe. That's right.
I gotta remember.

- And this is little Tommy.
- Hello, Tommy.

- Glad to know you.
- How about that face?

[chuckles]

- Grace.
- Oh, oh, and poor, uh..

- And Grace.
- How do you do?

Glad to know you.

My, I never saw
anything so big.

(Ellen)
'Imagine dragging a thing--'

Yeah, look at that thing.
It's enormous.

You know, I don't see how

you ever had the courage
to pull that.

- Oh, ho.
- It would scare me to death.

- Oh, it's nothin', really.
- Oh, don't you believe it.

He's a wonderful driver.

You have to be
a wonderful driver to haul that.

Oh, now, Tacy.

Well, you are.
You know you are.

You should've see him going
through towns and everything.

How much would a thing like that
weigh, would you say, huh?

- Oh, a little over three tons.
- Three tons?

- Imagine pulling three tons.
- Weren't you scared?

Well, I'll be honest,
the first 100 miles..

First 50 miles,
I was a little nervous but, uh

after you get the hang of it,
well, there's nothing to it.

Nothing to it at all.

You know, I dare say a thing

like that is
pretty expensive, huh?

Oh, 5000, 6000 with the extra

but that's not really expensive.

No. You have to think
of it as a home.

And where could you find a home
fully equipped for $6000?

Can we go in?

Can we see what
it looks like inside?

Well, not just now, kids.

I'll have to stabilize it first.

He has to stabilize it. Hook it
down so it doesn't jiggle.

Oh. We thought you could put
it there in front of the garage.

That way you could hook in
on the electricity.

Oh, that's very good, yes.

- Just back it in.
- Yes..

- Back it in?
- Yeah.

Uh, that way you can have
the use of the car.

Oh, sure. Of course. Yes.

Well, here goes.

[engine revving]

You're going to be his family
now, all of you.

I know he's gonna love you and
I hope you're gonna love him.

- I'm sure we will.
- Of course, we are.

"To back a trailer coach

"place your hand at the bottom
of the steering wheel.

"Move your hand right,
counterclockwise

to back the trailer
to your right."

Counterclockwise.

"Move your hand
to the left, clockwise

to back the trailer
to your left."

Clockwise, left.

Counterclockwise, right.

Right, counterclockwise.

[engine revving]

Uh, there..

Go, go! That way.

[all clamoring]

Hold it! Hold it!

[all clamoring]

The other way!

Oh, Aunt Anastacia,
this is terrible.

I'm so sorry.

It's quite alright.
It doesn't matter.

I think I know
what he's been doing wrong.

It'll be fine now.

- Pull forward!
- A little more to the right.

[indistinct yelling]

Turn the other way!
The other way!

[screams]

My rose! My rose!

You tore down my rose with
your lousy, stinking trailer!

[sobbing]

Oh, darling, what's the matter?
This is awful.

I don't know.
I don't know what's the matter.

I don't know, everybody's
yellin' at the same time.

I'm trying to do my best, so I'm
turning it right the guy says

"Turn left." I turn left,
the guy says, "Turn right."

I read the book,
counterclockwise--

Nicky!

Now sit down and be quiet.

Now you just sit down
and relax.

I'll take care of this.

Now listen, everybody. Quiet!

There's too many people
telling him what to do.

You're, you're confusing
this poor boy.

Only one person
should give instructions!

Start the motor, darling.

Don't you worry about a thing.

Now I want absolute silence,
you hear?

Come on now, darling.
Don't worry about a thing.

Alright, now.

Okay. Now.

Now go right back.
Take it easy.

Now, little to the left.

Little to the left.

That's right.
Take it easy now.

Little bit to the right.
Straight back.

Now, now, little to the left.

Little to the left.
That's right.

Take it easy.
Now, straight back.

Right, straight.

Straight back. That's it.

Straight, straight, stop!

[brake screeches]

Dear, you're alright.

Get back.

Alright, hold it now.

Stay right there.

I just wanna get lined up here.

Okay, okay.

Come on, now, but slowly.

Take it easy.

Slowly, slowly. That's right.

That's right.

Uh-huh, uh-huh. Straight.

Straight.

[all screaming]

- Good morning.
- Good morning.

- Beautiful morning, isn't it?
- Yeah, great.

That certainly was a lovely
dinner last night, Angela.

The bread pudding and all.

Shame you have
to rush off like this.

Look, I wish you'd
let me pay for that.

It would certainly
make me feel better.

No, really.
We wouldn't think of it.

Well, at least this one thing.

We won't take
this wedding present.

Oh, now, don't do that.

We insist on your having that.

- Don't we, mother?
- You heard him, Edgar.

- It makes him feel better--
- It certainly does.

Well, we'll say goodbye again.

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.

- Bye.
- Goodbye.

- Bye.
- 'Bye.'

- Bye.
- Bye.

You giving back that check. I
was gonna get us a deep freeze.

You're gettin'
a deep freeze right now.

Look at those faces.

[instrumental music]

[instrumental music]

♪ Da dum do do dee dee ♪♪

- You're a wonderful cook.
- Well, thank you.

I'll be a lot better
when I get to know that stove.

Hey, listen, don't you think
we'd better start eating

those peaches if you wanna
finish that whole log?

[chuckles]
Nicky.

They're not for eating,
I'm gonna put them up.

Up where?

I'm gonna can them.

Here in the trailer,
you're gonna can them?

You don't understand,
you have to grab these things

when they're in season.

You just wait till next winter.

We're gonna have peaches

and tomatoes,
and raspberries and..

[sighs]

Nicky, it isn't so bad here,
is it?

I mean, you feel a little better
about the trailer, don't you?

I got news for you,
you could make me happy

livin' in a cave.

Oh, I haven't even begun
to make you happy.

You're gonna have a real home.

Gonna find a place for all
your books and everything.

I'm-I'm gonna get
a television set.

I think that's a good place
for it right over there.

Aren't you afraid
you're gonna spoil me?

I like being pampered,
you know.

I'm liable to get
real lazy and..

Whoa!

What on earth is that?

Isn't it beautiful, darling?

- Our first rock.
- Our first what?

Put it down here, honey.

You see, what I thought, we'd
get a rock wherever we went.

And then we get to Colorado
we'll put them

all around the patio
and whenever we look at 'em

we can think of all
the wonderful times we've had.

Every one a memory, you know?

You're like a magpie
buildin' a nest.

Pickin' up a piece of straw
here, a thread there.

You better be nice to me or I'll
take my trailer and go home.

Well, I'll tell you a secret,
your trailer is no good

without my car to haul it.

Like me. No good without you.

[chuckles]

Keep thinking that.

[instrumental music]

♪ I'm just breezin' along
with the breeze ♪

♪ Breezin' along ♪

♪ Trailin' the trails ♪

♪ Trailin' the trails ♪

♪ Roamin' the seas ♪

♪ We're trailin' and a roamin' ♪

♪ Like the birdies
that sing in the tree ♪

♪ Tweet tweet tweet ♪

♪ Pleasin' to live ♪

♪ Livin' to please ♪

♪ The sky is the only roof ♪

♪ I have over my head ♪

♪ And when I'm weary ♪

♪ Mother Nature makes me a bed ♪

♪ In a trailer ♪

♪ We're just going along ♪

♪ As we please ♪

♪ Breezin' along ♪

♪ With the breeze ♪♪

[instrumental music]

[music continues]

(Nicholas)
'I thought you wanted this one.'

(Tacy)
'No, honey. The other one.'

'Come on, help me
pick up the other one.'

- That one over there?
- 'Yeah.'

Alright. Eh.

(Tacy)
'This is a beauty.'

Oh, look at that.

Isn't that terrific?
Heavy, huh?

[chuckling]

[instrumental music]

I wanna drive, Nicky.

Now, Tacy, that's one thing
that I can't let you do.

Oh, come on.
Now I'm a good driver.

I've been driving
since I was 15.

And in Los Angeles,
yeah, what more could you ask?

Now look, honey. This is
something altogether different.

You're pullin' three tons.
There's a trick to it.

I know, I've been watching you.
I know how.

Now, honey, stop this nonsense.
Now, come on..

No, now, you little..

Oh, you ought to
at least let me try.

What if you broke an arm
or a leg or something?

Then I'd have to drive
and you'd be sorry.

Okay.

[engine rumbling]

[tires screech]

- Careful!
- What's the matter..

Don't ever take off like that.

You gotta remember, you've got
50 feet of train behind you.

I know, dear. I know.

Now slow down.

You're going too fast, dear.

- Slow down.
- Yes, dear. Don't worry.

Hey, what are you doing?
You can't do that!

[horn blaring]

- You are over the white line.
- I know it, dear.

Have you lost your mind?
Get back, get back!

Just a minute.

[horn blaring]

Is that the Denver-route mark?

I don't know. You're going
so fast, I couldn't read it.

It's alright. I saw it.

I'm telling you,
you're driving too fast.

You cannot drive
this trailer at this speed.

It's alright. It's only 35.

It's alright for you,
but I am sitting

on the suicide seat.

Oh, very well.

Alright, now, we're coming
over to a town now.

Come on, I-I'll take over now.
Pull over there.

I can't. There's a car
behind me.

[horn blaring]

[horn blaring]

Oh, Nicky, did you see
that darling dress?

It was blue
and it had rickrack edging--

Keep your hands
on the wheel!

Wow!

There's a turn out of town.
I think it's right.

Would you look at the map,
please?

- Red light! Red light!
- I see it.

- Trailer brakes first.
- I have them.

Which way? We may be coming
to it any minute.

- Which way?
- I'm trying to find it.

Green light. Green light.

If you'd stop watching the road
and look at the map.

Somebody's gotta watch
the road.

Here's where we are,
right here.

- You turn left. Here it is.
- Are you sure?

Oh, you're reading
the map wrong.

- We're going south now.
- What's that to do--

When you go south, you have to
read the map upside down.

That way.

Of all the stupid,
ridiculous nonsense

I've ever heard,
this is the stupidest.

It would take a woman
to figure out that..

[tires screech]

[horns blaring]

Beautiful spot, isn't it?

You ever seen
such wonderful trees?

And the color.
Just look at that color.

Yes, sir.

- You wanna stop and get a rock?
- No.

Okay.

I thought you might like to.
It's so nice here.

Hey, what was that camp
you were talking to me

about this morning?

You said it was some
very special trailer park

you wanted to stay
in tonight.

- You passed it an hour ago.
- I did?

Oh, I'm sorry.
I didn't notice.

Oh, well, there'll be
a lot more, I guess.

♪ La-di da-da ♪

♪ Di-da da-da-da ♪

♪ La-di da-da ♪♪

[trailer squeaking]

Good evening.

Could you tell us
where we could find

a trailer park around here?

You passed the best one
in the country

a couple hundred miles back.

Oh, nothing else around, huh?

Not a thing, bud.

You wanna go back?

Two hundred miles?

I'll tell you
what you can do.

I'm closing up
and you're welcome to park here.

Two dollars for the night
and you can plug into

my electric current.

Okay.

Thank you.

If you're hungry, you'll find
something to eat in the icebox.

And what are you doing?

I'm going to sleep
in the living room.

You're not gonna do
any such thin'.

- Oh, no?
- No.

If anybody's gonna sleep there,
I will.

Please, let's not be
any more childish

about this
than is necessary.

I would prefer sleeping here.

So if you don't mind,
will you take your things

and get out?

Just as you wish.

[engine whirring]

[horn blaring]

[siren blaring]

[gunshots]

Nicky! Nicky!

Nicky, don't let's ever
fight again.

No, sweetheart.

Nicky, you know..

You know, why I think
we had that awful fight

why we have arguments?

We drive too long.

We get to a place
tired and hungry

and then we have to wait hours
for me to get dinner ready.

Well, honey,
then all we have to do

is just eat in restaurants.

You know that half the time

there just aren't
any restaurants.

- No, I have a better idea.
- What's that, honey?

Tomorrow afternoon,
about half an hour

before we want
to have our dinner

I'll go back in the trailer
and get everything ready.

And then you pull
into some nice spot

and by the time you get
the wheels blocked

and get washed up,
I'll have dinner on the table.

Mmm, I'm hungry already.

[sniffs]
Mmm, smells wonderful.

- What are we having?
- Ragout of beef.

Ragout of beef?

Angel food cake
with fresh strawberries.

- Oh, boy!
- And Caesar Salad.

Oh, I make a wonderful
Caesar Salad.

Let me crumble
the Roquefort cheese.

- I got a special--
- Roquefort?

Only boors use Roquefort.

You use aged, grated Parmesan.

Now, come on, honey.
Get out of here, will you?

- I have a lot to do.
- I.. Thank you. Alright.

Oh, listen, can I cut
the greens for you?

You don't cut the greens.
You tear them.

Now get out of here,
will you, please?

I have a lot to do.

- Now stop that!
- Sorry.

Oh, listen.

If you need anything, just rap
at the front window. Eh?

Yes, dear. Yes, I will.

Mm-hm-hm.

♪ We're having rogout of beef ♪

♪ And a fruit cake
with strawberries ♪

♪ And a C-ee-ee ♪

♪ Yes a C-Caesar Salad ♪

♪ A Caesar Salad ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la lee la la ♪♪

[instrumental music]

[creaking]

[music continues]

[music continues]

♪ My compliments to the chef ♪

♪ Good evening Pierre
what are you pushin' tonight? ♪

♪ Could I tempt you
with a lobster thermidor ♪

♪ Ah uh the bouillabaisse ♪

♪ Is maddening monsieur nah ♪

♪ Eh how 'bout Ragout beef? ♪

♪ Ragout beef?
I'm your boy ♪♪

Nicky! It isn't going to work!

Nicky!

[instrumental music]

Nicky!

♪ Tear the lettuce ♪

♪ Don't you cut it ♪

♪ And be sure to crumble
the cheese ♪

♪ Don't you dare ♪

♪ To use any Roquefort
la-la.. ♪

Whoa.

♪ La li la la la la-a ♪♪

[music continues]

Nicky!

♪ Mario ice the champagne ♪

♪ Serve the brandy
in the gold room ♪

♪ But I warn you no corkage ♪

♪ Or heads will roll ♪♪

[music continues]

Nicky!

Nicky!

♪ First you dice the carrot
slice the onion ♪

♪ Chop the pepper fine ♪

♪ Then you sift the flour
grind the meat ♪

♪ In salt and pepper filling ♪

♪ Then you add some garlic ♪

♪ Oh oh not too much now ♪

♪ Just a soupcon ♪♪

[music continues]

[bottle clanking]

♪ Be sure it's the best ♪

♪ In the house ♪

♪ Oh the white wine
with the fish ♪

♪ And the red wine
with the meat ♪

♪ And the white wine
with the fish ♪

♪ And the red wine
with the meat ♪

♪ And the white wine
with the fish ♪

♪ And the red wine
with the meat ah! ♪♪

[laughs]

Well?

[instrumental music]

You're on the wrong side
of the street.

That's alright, dear.
Come on, now.

Take it easy, now. Be careful.

There you are.

- You're double-parked.
- Yes, I know, honey.

Don't worry.

Now, look. I'll be back
at the cafe in one hour.

- Will you be all right?
- Uh-huh.

(Tacy)
'Love this stuff.
My mother used to make it.'

'I can still remember
what the kitchen smelled like.'

'It was so wonderful.'

Oh, here he is at last.
The coffee, please.

[clicks tongue]
Wasn't I lucky?

The waitress said
that she had some piccalilli.

Makes it with her own
tomatoes and things

so I got a dozen jars.

- Thank you.
- Surely.

Tacy, I was talking to a fellow
in the parking lot.

He made me an offer
on the trailer.

A thousand dollars.

He takes over the payments
and everything.

He'd pay us today, cash.

Where were you planning
for us to live?

In a house,
like human beings.

Something that is fastened
to the ground

that doesn't quiver
every time you take a step.

Something that we don't
have to drag after us

every place we go,
like a couple of turtles.

- I think you're terrible.
- Huh?

Talking about
selling our home.

Oh, for heaven's sakes,
Tacy.

You don't mean to tell me
that you were thinking

of staying there
after all that's happened.

Look at you.
You can't walk.

You're bruised
from head to foot.

That wasn't
the trailer's fault.

I had no right
to be back there.

The girls at the hair dressers
told me it's against the law

for anyone to,
to ride in the back

of a trailer
while it's moving.

You could have
been arrested for that.

I could have been arrested?

They won't let you put
any living thing back there.

Not a cat, or a dog,
or even a canary

much less your wife.

I put you back there, eh?

- I was the one?
- You certainly did.

Now you listen to me, you..

Oh! You see what I mean?

That's all we've been doing
since we bought

that-that-that-that,
that thing.

Fighting, fighting,
fighting.

I'm not fighting.
I'm just trying to tell you.

Besides, it isn't your trailer,
it's mine.

You have no right
to sell it.

I am the one
who has to haul it.

And let me tell you
something.

It's been one long nightmare

worrying about,
will the brakes hold?

Are the signals working?

Are we gonna make that hill?

- Is it boiling over?
- I don't care.

I won't sell it.
I don't care what you say.

We'd be fools.
We're almost there.

We got a thousand miles
to go yet!

Well, I don't care.
I won't sell it.

I love it.
I love it.

Well..

...at least I know
where I stand.

You finished?

- Nicky?
- Yes?

The piccalilli.

[instrumental music]

Nicky?

'Nicky, darling,
it's awfully late.'

Hm.

Aren't you ever coming to bed,
dear?

Tacy, come here.
I wanna show you something.

I've been figuring
tomorrow's run.

If you can call it a run.

Now you see that,
that figure?

- Uh-huh.
- Eight thousand.

Eight thousand? Well, that's
a pretty good-sized little town.

They'll have
a nice trailer park there.

That is not population.
It's elevation.

That mountain is 8000 feet.

- That's high, isn't it?
- Yeah. Too high for us.

Oh, I wouldn't worry.

They said
it would take mountains.

Look, Tacy,
that was before

when this thing
weighed three tons.

Heaven only knows
what it weighs now.

You must've collected
a ton of rocks and another ton

of all this stuff
you've been canning.

It's all got to go.

What do you mean?

I mean I want you
to get rid of all this stuff

before we start
that climb tomorrow morning.

You can get the manager
to help carry them out.

Well, I won't do it.
I just won't.

I think that's
perfectly ridiculous.

Look, Tacy, I will not
haul this trailer

one inch until
all this stuff is out.

- Where you going?
- I'm going to the garage.

They're gonna work on the car
all night.

Check on everythin'.

I'll be back after a while.

Don't wait up for me.

[instrumental music]

Mr. Ludlow, what was the name
on that one?

"Dinosaur National Monument."

Oh, that's one of my favorites.
I just can't let that go.

Would you bring it back again,
please?

Yes, ma'am.

Only eliminated
four so far.

Well, bridge of the Gods.

Snake River.

Oh, i-it's just too much
to ask.

Every one of them reminds me

of some wonderful place
we've been.

Now, to throw them away
just like

they're another bunch
of rocks

I just can't do it.
I just can't do it.

Mrs. Collini, you'll find
wonderful rocks in Colorado.

- Why, when we were there--
- I know. I know.

But this isn't the same,
you see, we're on our honeymoon

and everything, you know?

I think Nicky's being
unreasonable.

I thought a trailer was like,
like a boat.

The more weight it carried,
the better it would ride.

Isn't that true?

Well, in a way.

Can't you think of some way
that we can keep them?

- Pretty heavy, you know?
- I know.

But can't you
think of something, please?

Well, uh..

Perhaps you could, uh, sort of

distribute them along each side.

Oh, I see,
you mean distribute them

so that they'll carry
the weight evenly.

- Is that it?
- Yeah.

Oh, that's a wonderful idea.
Will you help me?

I don't have much time.
We could put some down here.

You better tell your husband

so he'll know what to expect.

Oh, yeah, I'll-I'll tell him.

But later, you know.

Look, do you think
I'll make this alright?

Oh, sure just remember

what I told you
about the brakes.

You can't use electrical brakes
continuously.

If they burn out,
there's nothing to hold you.

Better keep stopping
to cool them off.

- If the road isn't too steep.
- What if the road is too steep?

Well, in that case
you just nose the car

into the bank and jackknife
the trailer to stop.

Unless the road is too narrow,
then you're better off..

W-wait a minute.
Suppose the road is too narrow?

Well, you gotta use your own
judgment when you get there.

You know,
feel out the terrain.

Look, is there
any other road

that I can take
instead of this one?

Well, yeah.
You could, uh..

You could take the route
around here

but that's a 500-mile detour

and the road is in bad shape
since the flood.

The bridge was washed out.

You'll be alright.
Just keep your nerves steady.

Thanks.

[instrumental music]

[horn blaring]

- Hi.
- Hi.

Did, uh.. Did you get rid
of all the rocks and things?

Yes.

- Okay. Let's go then.
- Okay.

- I'll lock it.
- Thanks.

[metal clanging]

[engine rumbling]

- Tacy?
- Hmm.

I guess I was kind of rough
on you last night

but you understand,
don't you?

Sure. I understand.

[engine rumbling]

Well, at least we have
a nice day for it.

- How do you mean?
- I mean the weather and all.

Oh, oh, yes.
Yes, it's a fine day.

A-as a matter of fact,
I was thinking

a while back there
that it was a fine day..

...for it.

♪ I've got you under my.. ♪♪

[engine revving]

Did you, uh,
finish your book?

What...book?

The book you were reading.

Oh.

That book.

Did you finish it?

No.

- Didn't finish it, huh?
- What?

The book.

Oh!

No.

Halfway through it, I found out
that we'd seen the movie.

So I didn't finish it.

They didn't make a movie
out of that, did they?

Well, they didn't
call it that.

They changed the title.

They called it,
"The Something, uh.."

"The Something, uh.."

Was it the "Golden somethin'?"

No, no.
Nothing like that.

I-it was the one with the..
W-what's his name?

You know, the-the actor
that was married

to the beautiful brunette girl
that likes squirrels?

Michael Wilding.

[rumbling]

Was it that picture
where the fellow

wore his shoes on his knees?

No. No.

Then there was this
big party scene..

...where she threw
the drink in his face.

Then, this woman..

- Which woman?
- The other woman.

Not the one who didn't
know the brother.

You mean the one
who knew the brother?

Yeah.

Well, this woman came in
who had met the brother.

Uh, but didn't know
where the brother was.

And then the girl told them
about the brother

a-and then there was
this big..

Ah!

[engine whirring]

[engine revving]

[rumbling]

[trailer squealing]

[engine rumbling]

[engine whirring]

[clattering]

[squealing]

[clattering]

[trailer squealing]

[engine revving]

[trailer squealing]

[engine revving]

[trailer squealing]

- Thank heavens we made it.
- Yeah.

Now we got to get down.

I-I didn't mean to
lie to you, Nicky.

But they mean so much
to me, Nicky.

Nic-Nick! Nicky!
Nicky, stop it!

Stop it! Oh, Nicky, please,
don't, please!

We made it.
Nothing happened.

Nicky, please!
Please don't!

- Stop it!
- Ah!

Nicky, I'll never speak
to you again

as long as I live!

Nicky! Nicky!
Nicky!

I'll never know how I got
the trailer down that mountain.

It was a nightmare.

We didn't say a word
to each other.

That night, I got in my car
and drove away

trying to get it out
of my system.

When I came back,
the trailer was gone.

My wife was gone.

You know, they say that
most marriages that break up

break up
in the first three years.

In a trailer,
it's the speed-up system.

Well, now, I would have thought
you were lucky starting off life

in an up-to-the-minute thing
like that.

I remember when mother
and I were married.

'We lived in a two-room shack.'

'No heat, kerosene lamps.'

We had to go outside
to wash our hands.

Well, sir, we fought
like two cats in a bag

and we'd have split up for sure
that first winter

if it hadn't been so cold.

We had to make up,
or we'd have froze to death.

And you know the funny thing?

Any fight we ever had
would've been patched up

in a minute if either of us
could have brought ourselves

to say two words.

'Just two words,
"I'm sorry."'

You've no idea
the way it works.

I'll bet if you went to her
and said, "I'm sorry--"

Sorry? Sorry for what?
She's the one.

She should come
crawling on her knees.

You realize she could have
killed the two of us?

She and her rocks
and her raspberry jams.

[horn blaring]

Why, there's Mrs. Tewitt now.

I'll be in the trailer.

Joe, the freezer fits.
Isn't it wonderful?

Come on, darling, I'll show you
just where it goes.

Not just now.
Wait a minute.

Would it be asking too much
if I took my clothes

or are they suppose to go
with the trailer?

I've already sent them, express,
care of the project.

I'll send your money
there too.

- Money?
- Money for the trailer.

The trailer is yours.
I gave it to you.

Well, under the circumstances,
of course

I couldn't accept it.

I'll just keep enough money
to get me home, that's all.

Now, if you'll excuse me.

Tacy, I'd like to say
something.

I..

- I'm..
- Yes?

Well..

I better go.

[engine revving]

Nicky!

Nicky!

Nicky!

Nicky!

Nicky!
Nicky, I'm sorry, I--

No, honey, no.
Don't say it. Don't say it.

- Let me say it, honey.
- I'm sorry, baby.

I should never have made you
get that--

No, honey. It wasn't..

Looks like we don't
get a trailer.

Well, not this one.

[instrumental music]

[music continues]