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BASED ON A TRUE STORY
Pay now in ten instalments.
Goal, goal!
85 billion kilowatt hours per year starting in 198-...
All your electronics
will work for a lot longer.
...Frutti, a great success
from the new line...
Color and black and white television sets.
Here is the master Walter Cla ...
present
...children all over Brazil.
Bingo's show has become a phenomenon
and it has raised a national issue.
The prod ucers of the show say the clown's identity
is a secret no one will ever know.
Who's the man behind the mask?
''BINGO - THE KING OF THE MORNINGS''
A rabbit?
Hi, Mr. Rabbit. Do you want to be friends?
-Friends with a fox? - Yes.
-Are you crazy? -Why?
Foxes are tricky.
- You'll want to eat me. -No, I'm different.
I'm vegetarian, I like to eat carrots, just like you.
-Carrots? - Yes.
Argh, I like hamburgers.
And I'm the one with the bad reputation .
Listen here, fox. If you don't bring me a hamburger for dinner,
I swear I'm going to eat you !
Help! Help! Somebody save a helpless fox!
Augusto, we still have three scenes to shoot. The crew's waiting.
Be careful. There's a very hungry rabbit in here.
This is the last scene, OK? Then we'll go out for dinner.
Stay here. Can I trust you?
Can I?
The love lamp!
Can someone bring the love lamp to the set, please!
Are you ready, Augusto?
One minute.
C'mon, Baron .
-Ready? -Always.
Ready to roll.
Camera !
''The Love Lamp''. Scene 6, take 3.
Action !
Life's not a joke, huh .
Bye, dad !
Wait, monkey.
Did you kiss your grandma goodbye?
-Yes, but she was asleep. -Did you wash this apple?
Yes.
-Did you brush your teeth? -Yes.
You could do a movie for kids.
Yeah, I have to do that.
-Promise? -Yes.
You'll see my next movie with all your friends from school.
-Can I tell them? -Wait.
Let's think about the movie first.
-It's got to be cool. -It'll be very cool.
-The coolest in town . -In the planet.
-In the galaxy. -In the universe!
Ang�lica's got a new car?
Didn't she tell you?
-Love you, monkey. -Love you more.
Hi, baby.
THE LOVE LAMP
It's true then!
Wait! I'm married.
The lamp genie only helps married ladies.
So hurry!
My husband could be here any minute.
Hurry? You must be crazy.
If you were in a carriage, I would you start by the donkey.
Life's not a joke, huh.
Hi, Marcelo.
Whiskey, please.
And my wife?
Lunch with her friends at the club.
Then, she'll go to the salon.
We have some time?
Time for what?
People think I have it all, but there are two things I miss.
Time
and you.
What's he whining about?
The show is off the air because of the ratings.
It's off the air because it sucked .
No, you deal with it, I'm busy. Talk later.
Carry on, boy.
So I was listening to your conversation ...
My movies are all blockbusters, box-office hits.
I honestly think I can help with ratings.
Do you know how many times I've heard this bullshit?
Help with ratings?
When national movies do well,
they have up to two million spectators.
Here at Mundial we reach 90 million spectators a day.
We're talking primetime soap operas.
Primetime soap opera?
Yeah, I promised Ang�lica .
You're offering me a role in a primetime soap opera?
This girl keeps my ratings up.
I'd like to give something back.
Hi.
Who would've thought?
Hi, Augusto.
Together again on a set.
Now with our clothes on .
Thanks for the help.
I didn't do it for you, I did it for Gabriel.
I'd forgotten how sweet you are.
By the way, I'm working late. Can you take him?
No problem . Lots of scenes?
-About twelve. -Twelve?
I have one line in one scene.
''Sir, your car is ready.''
Someone makes money writing that.
Good morning, how are you?
-Hi, good morning . -Good morning .
-How are you? -How's it going?
-Morning . -Morning .
Hi, director. I need your help.
-And you are? -Augusto Mendes.
I'm the lead in ''Golden Horn'', ''Megalomaniac Nymphets, ''The Love Lamp''.
-You must have watched them . -I need to shoot.
So, boss...
Give me a chance and I'll make the audience pee their pants.
You need to focus. You are on !
-Fine. -Ready? Let's go.
A second, please.
C'mon, Baron.
OK..
Attention... Action.
Sir, your car is ready.
OK., thank y ou.
The brakes were failing, but I fix ed them myself.
OK., thank you.
You can count on me. Always.
OK., thank you.
I'd never let you get into an accident over a brake failure.
Sure, thank you.
After all, you only want to skid on the secretary's curves.
Right?
Cut!
So, was it good?
If you want to help, act like a prop.
A prop?
Better to be a prop here at Mundial than a lead elsewhere.
-Tell him, Rog�rio. -There's no life outside Mundial.
I'm an actor, an actor needs lines.
I don't need a talking vase in my soap opera .
-Vase? -Calm down, Augusto.
Listen, you can get someone else
to be a vase in your soap opera .
I'm out. What is talent to you people?
A beautiful nose, straight teeth?
Is that talent? You'll regret this.
You'll be saying : ''Fuck, I had Augusto Mendes
and didn't give him a chance.''
One day, this silver lady
will kiss the sole of my shoes.
-Good morning . -Good morning, pal.
Augusto Mendes, actor. Son to the great Marta Mendes.
And this is her grandson . I'm here to audition for the soap opera .
OK.
Open the gates.
Hi, where's the audition for the soap opera?
-Over there. -Thanks.
Hey, what is this other line?
-For ''Bingo the Clown''. -Bingo the Clown?
Yeah, we're building a studio for his show.
-Tons of lighting ... -The clown will have a studio?
Bingo's been a top-rated show in the U .S. for 10 years.
Can I audition for the clown instead?
Are you a clown?
Hello, kids! How are you?
Are you ready for a fun morning?
I'm sure you are!
We're going to play a lot...
-What happened? -Thank you, you can go.
Seriously?
Three buses to get here...
You can get changed now.
-What happened? -We have your contact, you can go.
Vasconcelos, this is not a break.
Don't leave the studio. Wally!
-Valdemar? You know what to do. -Yeah .
Come with me.
Son ...
Don't ever let anyone do that to you .
-Do what? -Humiliate you .
I bet $1000 you can't do it.
Where's Vasconcelos?
C'mon .
Just a second . Ready?
Action!
My dear Brazilian friends!
Who wants to play with me?
Wally?
Augusto...
Augusto what?
Augusto Mendes, actor?
How many has he trashed?
A hundred .
Knock them dead .
On this mark?
Hey gambler,
-what time does it start? -Only God knows.
Is God very busy?
This fucking gringo is getting bummed today, isn't that right?
Who does this motherfucker think he is?
Is he better than us?
Why's that?
I think he wants to get rear-ended .
Why are you looking at me, you don't understand a word.
So pals, does he get rear-ended or not?
He'll go back to his country all chafed
and with white ointment up his ass!
So guys, does he get rear-ended
-or not? -Yes!
-Yes or no? -Yes!
Yes!
The candidate is so sweet and hardworking,
and he has a beautiful smile.
He's going to the throne, I give him a 1 0.
He sounds like a goose out of tune.
And with a missing tooth .
Yes, you're going to the throne so I can flush you .
-Mrs. Marta ! -My son !
Honey.
Mom .
Mom, I have to tell you something . But you have to sit down .
-What? -Please, sit down .
You'll love it.
I got a part at TVP.
It's not just a small role.
I'm the lead in a clown show.
-A clown, son? -Yes, a clown .
Who says the truth in Shakespeare's plays?
You've done them all, you know what I mean .
The clown is a classic, Marta . It's not for everyone.
I'm not talking about a shitty circus.
It's the biggest hit in American TV.
The big one.
I'm going to have lines, pages full of letters just for me.
Four hours on air every day.
A very successful show in American TV?
A big hit. Top-rated for 10 years.
No more butt on the screen?
No way.
Your son is gonna have tons of lighting on him .
Don't you always say we have to be on the spotlight?
Some people are ants,
some people are cicadas.
We are moths.
We need light in order to survive.
It's all there.
Is this the Bible or my contract?
It's just your contract.
Live show, five days a week, exclusivity for a year.
And the main part:
absolute secrecy. Nobody knows who Bingo is, got it?
And this is not a detail.
And why all the secrecy?
It's the same in the U .S.
Read it. You could be fined, fired and whatnot.
Take a look at it.
Where do I sign?
Last page, but you have to initial all of them .
Guys, why aren't you excited?
This is a clown show. Let's have fun !
Let's dance. C'mon, poodle head .
Give me your best moves.
Loosen up!
Come on, poodle head .
What's going on?
They're helping me rehearse the script.
Peter Olsen is waiting .
I'm anxious to meet the big boss.
-Remembering ... -No droopy tips, Ana .
I wouldn't keep him waiting if I were you .
Everybody on the set in 5!
TV people are very stressed out.
My costume!
Lucia .
Clear the set.
Everyone out.
Gambler, you owe me $1000.
You clown .
-Shouldn't I talk like a clown? -Can you do that?
Oh yeah, Mr. Walker.
If you can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen .
Come.
You have three marks: A, B and C.
It's on your script.
-Hence the letters in my script. -Exactly.
Remember to read on the right mark. Stand here.
Attention to the camera with the light on .
Look right into it.
Stay still.
Camera 2, Wally.
See?
The light is on, you look at it.
That's it.
Questions?
There's only one problem .
This.
What?
My son won't find this funny. Neither will his friends.
-Your son? -Gabriel.
This show's been a hit in 50 American states for 10 years.
But this is Brazil, there's no swagger.
Since you owe me money...
He's the boss.
Don't be crazy. Mundial is 8 points ahead .
Anyone can do the possible.
It's the impossible that gives me a boner.
Listen here.
Pay close attention .
Do you see all this structure?
This show is TVP's biggest investment this year.
We translated the original scripts in detail.
Who's the only Brazilian director with original American scripts today?
I am .
This is my big break, and you won't ruin it.
So, do me a favor and study this script.
Look at the camera, read the teleprompter
and that's it.
The rest you leave to me.
Let's rehearse.
Light the central grid .
Wally, where's the mic?
C'mon .
At the center, dear, c'mon .
Get him with the sign in the background .
Start reading the script.
How wonderful.
Bye.
-What's up? -Whose car is this?
-Ours. -Really?
Really.
-Is the engine 1.8? -No, it's a 4.1.
Are you sure it's yours?
No, I'm sure it's yours. It's a present. C'mon, hop in .
I have a present for you, too.
Is it Bingo?
Son, it's really good . Congratulations.
Thank you .
-Listen, we need to make a deal. -What deal?
Nobody can know daddy is Bingo, OK?
Why not?
No particular reason, but it's important.
Can't I tell any of my friends?
If you tell, daddy loses his job.
Kiss.
Keep this for me.
Where are we going?
Surprise.
-What's your friend's name? -Fred .
Wave him goodbye.
Beautiful kids from Brazil,
let's see who can answer a simple question .
Beautiful kids from Brazil,
let's see who can answer a simple question .
It's live. It's all or nothing .
-Are you ready? -Yes, I am .
Are you ready to make history?
I don't count my chickens.
Vasconcelos, the earpiece.
You're wearing the earpiece.
Jorge will help you put it on .
Does she ever come? Someone needs to fuck her.
She's religious.
I bet you a bottle of whiskey that I can fuck her in a month .
-Religious bitches are my thing . -I'll win this time.
18-year-old whiskey.
Wishing you good luck and all.
Polar bears, you run that way.
Two things.
I'll give you the lines on the earpiece
and for God's sake, your teleprompter has the entire script.
I remember the rehearsal.
Calm down !
Each to their audience.
Wally, who picked these kids?
Hey, leave it to me. I have a kid this age.
You have to make these children laugh .
Otherwise we're all fired .
Thanks for helping me relax.
You're welcome.
Your camera is up first.
The show's gonna rock.
Brace yourselves.
Focus on 2.
Roll opening credits.
Now it's time
K.ids could wait forever
If y ou're still here
Don't leave until the show's over
Everybody's laughing
Monday to Sunday
He's the most beloved Clown in town
Bingo is the greatest He's the funniest
He's the coolest clown In the universe
He's the coolest clown In the universe
He's the coolest clown In the universe
5, 4, 3...
C'mon, Baron .
Bingo, you're up.
Keep the long shot.
Zoom in 2.
How wonderful!
A new chapter begins today in the history of Brazilian TV.
Full of fun and ex citement.
I'm your friend, Bingo the clown,
and these are my helpers:
Mama Conchetta
and the Flea Boy!
Cameras 2 and 3 .
Who wants to play with Bingo?
Me...
Read the joke.
Check the script.
Beautiful kids from Brazil,
Let's see who can answer a simple question .
Why do plants never fight?
That's an easy one.
Because they are buds!
You're doing fine. Call a child from the audience.
Let's get a child to talk to Bingo.
The red audience.
Who's going to talk to me?
The boy next to the blond girl.
He looks nice and cute.
Come with Bingo.
Camera 3 . Go to mark C.
Come over here.
What's your name, pal?
-Rubens. -What a nice name, Rubens.
Did y ou know I had a friend called Rubens?
No.
-Do y ou like to study, Rubens? -Not much.
Studying is very important, obeying y our parents too...
Are y ou real?
Forget this boy.
Call in the cartoons.
I want that boy out of the picture.
I'll be right back with a lot of fun to y ou, mommy
and grand ma too! By e!
And we're out.
You can't let a little boy beat you like that!
''Little boy''? He got out of a supermax prison . He's a midget!
Don't start on the kids.
You have to make them laugh .
Hey, just listen to me.
This show is going to work with me as Bingo.
Give me a couple of days.
Forget about this gringo.
Hey, I am Bingo.
Trust me.
Silence, please!
Stop!
-You can't play here. -Who do you mean?
The ring is mine and you can't play here.
Ladies and gentlemen, the most spectacular moment
of today's show.
I said you couldn't play here.
No, you said we couldn't play over there.
You said nothing about here.
The ring is mine...
You can have your money back at the ticket office.
We're not here for that.
We're here to kiss the clown's feet.
That's gross.
What makes people laugh so hard?
Ask the magician for his tricks.
I'll tell if he tells.
I don't care about the magician . You're far better than him .
-I heard the applause. -Smart dad you've got here.
Do you know what this is?
The tiniest mask in the world . You need the gift to be a clown .
But you can improve this gift, right?
I want to be your intern . Name your price.
Hello, beautiful kids.
Who wants to play with Bingo?
Me...
-This script is kind of silly. -Kind of?
You can go.
Good morning, kids. Ready to spend a nice morning with me?
You can change now.
Someone take him, please.
Good reaction, well done.
It works like a Swiss watch .
We move together.
Get down on the count of three.
Clowns always get beat up...
-Pay attention ! -OK.
Don't feel sorry for yourself. Clowns don't hold grudges.
No matter how many punches they get...
he always gets up and tries again .
Check this out. Come here, Nando.
Look.
-Got it? -Yeah .
But there's one thing .
Clowns don't take orders. If you're told to get down, you get up.
If you're told to bend,
you kick his ass.
And if the ass belongs to someone powerful and arrogant, even better.
The audience goes wild .
Glory.
C'mon, Baron .
And now, ladies and gentlemen...
Your student is in the ring .
...the Globe of Death!
Good morning, beautiful kids! What a nice day.
It's a great day to play and be happy.
Good morning, beautiful kids! What a nice day.
If today's show is like the last, the gringo will eat you alive.
Watch your focus and leave the rest to me.
-It's been a week. -I know, I...
I'd like to improvise a little.
If you improvise, it'll be at your own risk.
I never told you to improvise.
Did you see that?
Double-faced, cynical! Rogue.
I love it.
Wally.
Countdown.
-5, 4, 3, 2, 1. ON AIR
Bingo, you're up!
Bingo!
Good morning everyone!
Today we're going to have fun until you get overdone!
Grandpa's wig will fall off from laughing so hard .
and grandma's denture is going to crack!
Because Bingo's here!
This is not on the script.
I want to hear your good morning .
I said good morning !
Good morning...
So-so. Let's try it over there.
Focus on audience 2.
Good morning...
Mamma Conchetta, show them a strong good morning
after a nice watermelon and scrambled eggs breakfast.
Good morning !
Now I want to hear you . Good morning !
Good morning!
-Now I'm happy. -Memory game now.
Who's got a good memory?
Who wants to play the memory game?
Let me see who I'm going to pick.
-Difficult choice. -Get a girl.
Let me see.
Not the ginger boy.
Hi bully, how are you?
Hi.
Why are you throwing your popcorn at your pal?
It's his popcorn .
Oh, he's quick on the draw.
Is that because you're taller than him?
Of course.
Forget this boy, he's a brute!
Oh, I get it.
We're facing the almighty king of the school.
Would Your Highness like to win a bike in the memory game?
-Yes! -Yes, he would .
So give me your hand and come play.
You have to give me a number from 1 to 1 6.
-C'mon, 1 to 16. -6.
He said 6!
Flea Boy, let's see what's behind number 6.
A turtle!
Your Highness is faster than a turtle, right?
Go back to the script, Augusto, now!
So tell me, where is the other turtle?
Number 6.
You've already said 6. Think about the bike!
-38! -Thirty...
Enough ! Get another kid now! Back to the script!
Just a sec, there's a bug buzzing in my ear.
Don't do that!
Much better now. Testing, testing !
All good .
Our little king has never been to school,
that's why he can't count to 16.
-I've been to school. -Oh yeah?
Then tell me, what's two times four?
-8! -8, he got it right!
A roll of the drums, please. Mamma Conchetta, turn number 8
to see if the other turtle is there!
He got a donkey!
He got a donkey because he's just like one.
Show some respect, kids.
It's not just any donkey.
This is the king of all donkeys!
Give it up to the great Emperor Donkey the Third !
Applause!
Give the clown a hug . I'm your friend, it was a joke.
Don't be sad .
Go back to your place.
Who wants to play with Bingo?
Who wants to play with Bingo?
He's calling a commercial break.
The coolest clown in the universe will be right back.
Very good .
7 0�/� is inspiration .
Just 30�/� is whiskey.
Inspiration and whiskey. Come in !
All great artists are like that.
I see flowers.
It's always spring in a clown's dressing-room .
Try this whiskey I got from a bet with a sucker.
I prefer something a bit spicier.
No, no, no!
Who wants some?
He was nice to you girls.
-Got excited, did you? -Wow!
Come here, babe.
C'mon, babe. Go for it.
A vision of paradise.
-Looking good . -What's this?
What are you doing here?
Out.
You work with entertainment, do you forget?
You want to sell fun
but you don't want people to have fun . Relax.
Sancho Panza, pour her a drink.
-I don't drink. -But you should .
This should not be a convent.
For the ratings to go up,
we have to be sexy.
Please lose this vulgar language in the work place.
I don't believe you're that tough .
I don't buy it.
Let's make a deal.
If you show me who you really are,
I'll stop swearing .
What do you say?
I don't think so.
Can I ask you something?
Let your hair down .
Let down your hair.
Mr. Olsen asked me to tell you you did well today.
You got through to the kids.
But he's worried about the script.
You can improvise, but pretend you're reading the script.
It doesn't make any sense, but the kids like it.
This babe is skittish, you have no chance.
What do you mean?
She bit the hook.
To catch a fish like that, you need patience and talent.
Especially a religious fish .
Watch and learn . And start saving for my 18-year-old whiskey.
C'mon, ladies first.
Let's play.
Son, it's on.
Mom, tell me the big news.
Mundial called me
and invited me to play a Countess in a primetime soap opera .
-No... -What's a Countess?
It's been 15 years, son .
My soap opera was top-rated,
everybody stopped me on the streets asking for autographs.
''Look at this hair.
It looks like a broomstick diva . So poor.
Let's give you a make over so you can get a millionaire, a banker
not a bakery owner.''
Bravo!
Mrs. Marta is back on TV.
From now on, from 9 a .m . to 9 p.m .,
the Mendes are on air.
Look, it's mommy!
You don't care about people,
-y ou only care about things. -Not true, Nina.
I don't know if I believe y ou.
Fernando, stop.
Don't do this to me.
Son, be nice to your grandma .
-Am I going to be alone? -No, with your grandma .
-I have a work thing . -Again, dad?
-It's work. -Can I come?
-No. -I can sleep in the car.
Forget about it. Come here.
Tomorrow is a holiday.
-Want to come to work with me? -OK.
Yay!
What work thing is that?
It's an avant-garde performance with two classical ballerinas.
Can't we come?
Impossible, mom . I'm out of here.
C'mon, tiger.
Hey, Tony.
Play this song at the end of show. B-side.
I'll let you know when .
The orange chicken is winning. Don't stop rooting!
Orange wins!
Lorraine, you win ! Give the clown a hug .
Get your prize with Flea Boy.
Come over here, Fabr�cio. Life's like this.
Sometimes we win, sometimes we lose.
All that matters is the swagger.
Where's your swagger? Go with Mamma Conchetta .
See you tomorrow, kids.
And don't forget.
make a big mess!
Pillow fight!
-What song is that? - I don't no.
Tony?
Everybody dancing !
Come dance, everybody!
Go crazy!
Let's dance!
Everybody!
Mommy, I was getting some
Getting some
Mommy, I was getting some
Getting some
I was getting some extra work done with the big boss
Mommy, I was getting some
Getting some
Mommy, I was getting some
Getting some
I was getting some extra work done with the big boss
Poodle head !
Thank you .
I was getting some, mommy
You'll end up getting fired .
Shall I stop doing my job because of work?
-Don't exaggerate. -Do I ever?
What about the ratings, who's first?
-Mundial. -Mundial, of course.
-What about us? -Third place.
We're going to beat Mundial.
We're actually worried about not losing third place.
This is the problem, Lucia .
You look at your own ass instead of looking at the horizon .
Tell him to read the subtitles.
What's missing for better ratings?
Help me think, let's brainstorm together.
What do children want most?
To laugh?
Son, what are you reading? Let me see.
BINGO, I LOVE YOU . TALKING TO YOU IS WHAT I WANT MOST IN THE WORLD.
Monkey,
you've just given me a brilliant idea .
Brilliant!
Hold this.
Why are you drinking from the jug?
Sancho, take this. Lucia .
What children want most is to interact with their idol.
If we do that, the ratings will go through the roof.
-Interact how? -I was hoping you'd ask.
Letters, those old things. We're in the heat of the 80's.
What children need is...
To give Bingo a call!
And Bingo talks to them live on the phone.
I'll talk to Peter Olsen, but he'll think it's risky.
No pain, no gain . Tell him that.
Son, come here. Give me a kiss.
My friend will drop you at mommy's.
-Sancho. -C'mon, champ.
Weren't we going to the movies?
Yeah, but daddy's got... A photo shoot.
We might go on Saturday, OK?
I'm coming .
-Bingo, Bingo! -A hug from the clown!
I want all the kids calling the coolest clown in the universe!
Mamma Conchetta has one more call for me. Let's see.
Hello? Who's that?
-Regiane. -Hi, Regiane. How old are you?
-Seven. -Nice.
What do you like most about the show, Regiane?
-I like y ou. -Will you marry me?
-But y ou're a clown! -But clowns make a good living .
Vasconcelos, what's wrong with the focus?
Regiane, this kiss is for y ou.
By e, Regiane. Everybody say by e.
One more call.
Hello? Who's calling?
-What? -What what?
You called Bingo.
-Can y ou speak up? -What, up?
Just a sec.
Is that better?
It's a boy now.
Bye!
One more call.
Who's talking?
Gabriel, don't you want to call Bingo?
No.
Let's take one more call.
Hello?
Bingo, kiss my ass!
No, no, no, kid.
I never kiss donkeys, their breath is horrible.
But if mommy and daddy like to kiss asses
that's none of this clown's business!
Sit tight. I'll be right back.
4, 3, 2, 1.
Commercial break.
Thank you . Why is the gringo so happy?
Team !
We're second place!
Team !
We're going to be first!
Hold your horses. Second has exceeded our expectations.
Lucia ...
Didn't you say this show was your big break?
-Why dream small? -''Lulu's Show'' is unbeatable.
Wally, what's next?
Well, no wonder.
I'm cute and all, but how can I beat this blonde?
-Take three kids to the stage. -Lucia .
If you'd let your hair down
wear a thong and walk in there with me
we would beat Mundial.
You laughed, I saw it!
Two minutes!
We need pepper, chili pepper.
We need pepper.
And I have an idea .
Lucia ! Lulu is cute, but she's got no ass.
Thirty seconds.
Bring the game on set!
Vasconcelos, zoom in on the Conchetta .
Mamma Conchetta, Vasconcelos!
I'm sorry.
Gretchen !
Gretchen !
-Can I send a kiss? -Speak here.
Can I send a kiss?
I want to send my niece Lara a kiss!
Lara, a kiss from Bingo!
Apart from being an excellent dancer and singer,
Gretchen is also a family girl.
She knows life is hard . Give it up to Gretchen !
Gretchen ! Gretchen ! Gretchen ! Gretchen !
Life's not a joke, huh .
Commercial break. I have an announcement.
For fuck's sake.
The phone company called complaining .
They're overloaded .
And there's one more thing you won't believe.
Spit it out.
We've reached first place.
We've reached first place!
Lucia ! Didn't I tell you?
Our goal is the impossible.
Right?
I'm so glad there was no bet!
-How many points ahead? -It varies from 1 to 2.
Easy, easy. Let's get back!
Let's get back.
-Wally! Where's Wally? -He's got ants in his pants.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Bingo, y ou're on.
Hi, pals.
Bingo is very happy today. Very happy indeed .
I want to send a message to two friends.
Rog�rio and Armando.
Hi Rog�rio, hi Armando. How are you doing?
I'm here on TV
and I just want to tell y ou that
the whole country is watching TVP.
So Rog�rio,
there's no life outside M undial?
It just so happens
we've reached first place!
Read my lips. FIRST PLACE.
First place!
-First place! First place! -Are you crazy?
First place! First place! First place!
Call a commercial break!
Repeat a cartoon, I don't care.
I told you that one day
the silver lady would kiss the sole of my shoe.
This is the silver lady.
And this is her kissing the sole of my shoe!
First place! First place!
First place! First place!
Bingo is very happy, Bingo's ratings rose,
just don't ask Bingo where he puts his nose.
First place!
Long live the king of the mornings. I got you a present.
-What's this? -It's a ticket.
-Is it what I think it is? -Have a nice trip.
Come in .
I'm off.
The board complained to me about you teasing Mundial.
But they sent you flowers.
Have a sit.
You know what I deserve today?
A date with you .
Remember our deal?
I stop swearing
and you show me the real you .
I don't think so.
You pick the place.
He'll find his way in through the smallest cracks:
vanity, lust and greed
are open doors to let the devil in .
Do y ou understand that?
Brother Josias?
Sister Rute, sister Lucia? Do you understand?
And why are you special?
Because y ou are here in this house.
Are you OK?
I've got a headache.
-Hallelujah ! -Hallelujah !
-Hallelujah ! -Hallelujah !
Hallelujah, y ou are special.
Are you sure you don't want a sip?
Wine is Jesus's blood .
As far as I know, you're not a Bible expert.
Jesus and I have a lot in common .
We are right up there and get straight to the point.
Straight to the point?
When will you have sex with me?
That's what marriage is for.
You want me to get married to have sex?
What if sex with that person isn't good?
Isn't it better to know beforehand?
-You only think of petty pleasures. -Who says they're petty?
-You've had too much to drink. -What's wrong with that?
My pastor says alcohol isn't the problem, but the drunk who thinks he's funny.
You really take him seriously?
He's got a sense of humor and it's just right.
There's no rhythm to his show, he's repetitive.
That is not a show. And life is not a stage.
Who says so?
I won't waste my time explaining the obvious.
You really think I drink because a devil on my shoulder tells me to?
You really think I'm stupid?
If I did, I wouldn't be here.
I think you should relax a little.
Stop thinking about Jesus
and think about what could give you some actual pleasure.
For me, Jesus is real.
And saying his name gives me great pleasure.
Jesus! Jesus! Oh Jesus!
Jesus! Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!
Augusto?
Are you OK?
You're very pretty.
You get me stirred up.
Shame it's only your shell I see right now.
Buddy, get me some whiskey.
You didn't just say that.
That's terrible.
Just my ''shell''...
So cheesy.
Wait. It's cheesy, but it's cute.
TVP NEWS
The coolest clown in the universe has conquered the country.
After reaching first place here at TVP,
the live show is now four hours longer.
Besides making TV mornings more fun,
Bingomania has spread to stores
with LPs, clothes, comics and licensed prod ucts.
Among games, cartoons and clowneries,
getting to kiss the nose of the most beloved clown
is something children even fight for.
How nice, one more.
That's great, one more!
One more!
This feels so good, one more!
That's really great!
Do you like it? A real Baron's palace.
Of course I like it, son !
-And the view... -It's great, isn't it?
-This apartment. -The best is yet to come.
-Come, come. -I'm coming .
Marta Mendes.
Have you seen your son on the magazine cover?
Mom, I was nominated for Best Children's Show Host.
Are you proud?
My son, finally some recognition .
It was about time.
I'll personally ask Rui Galv�o to make y our suit
because my Augusto deserves every spotlight on him .
Yes, mom . Let me show Gabriel. Son, look here.
Look at daddy on the magazine.
Look, one, two, three, four,
five, six pages with photos and an interview.
Look.
It's not you, it's Bingo.
What do you mean? Daddy is Bingo.
What good is that if no one knows it?
Ladies and gentlemen,
the Brazilian TVAwards will start soon.
Here it is.
There, 18-year-old whiskey. I lost the bet.
This is not a woman, it's a General. No soul, no vagina .
We'll be back in 10 seconds. Take your seats, please.
Take it easy, Bingo.
We're back from our commercial break
to announce the Best Children's Show Host in Brazilian TV.
Who could it be?
It had to be him !
This mysterious masked man who has revolutionized children's shows.
Bingo!
Thank you .
Congratulations.
Take it.
This is our award .
I'm sorry for the other day.
You're the prettiest woman in here tonight.
You look like a different person in that dress.
Thank you, but I'm the same Lucia .
Pity.
It's free, madam .
Gretchen, are you dating Bingo?
-How does it feel to beat Mundial? -What was it like to get the award?
If you talk I can get you on the cover.
Who's the man behind the mask?
C'mon, Baron .
Dammit.
-Your invitation, sir. -I just came out.
-Who did you speak to? -I don't remember.
I've had three party crashers tonight.
Party crasher? Show some respect. Do you know who I am?
I'll call Lucia and she'll explain .
-You won't call anyone. -I'm fucking Bingo!
And I'm Harrison Ford .
-Let me in ! -Get him out of here.
Let me go! I'm fucking Bingo!
Motherfucker!
I just got an award in there!
I'm fucking Bingo!
Who's that guy?
A drunken nobody.
Motherfucker...
I love y ou.
My guiding voice,
light of my life.
Can I have a minute of your sacred attention?
I'm going to be serious for the first time in my life.
This is the end of the mask.
Our manumission letter, our passport to freedom .
Our retirement in the Caribbean .
Who says I want to retire in the Caribbean?
Rome, Jerusalem, wherever you want.
I wrote the argument for a different soap opera .
I beat Mundial in the mornings and I'll beat them in the evenings too.
Augusto Mendes with no make-up.
And you'll be the director. Prime time.
What do you say?
But I need your help. This is just a synopsis.
I need to get this to the hot shots ASAP.
-You're crazy. -The possible is no fun .
The impossible is in your hands.
Just make it happen .
There's a cocktail on Tuesday with the board and the sponsors
where they'll be more relaxed .
This is the Lucia I don't know.
C'mon, Baron .
Hi, y ou're a lucky person to have called Augusto Mendes.
Leave y our message and don't lose hope. Life moves on.
Dad, y ou do remember my birthday party is today, right?
I'm waiting. Love y ou.
Gabriel.
Ready, son?
Soon everyone will be gone. Shall we?
Happy birthday to y ou Happy birthday to y ou
Happy birthday dear Gabriel Happy birthday to y ou
Gabriel! Gabriel! Gabriel! Gabriel!
C'mon son, blow the candle.
Blow it.
C'mon, sweetie.
Flea Boy, slice this pie and give it to the children.
Here.
You're getting a call now.
We have a call for Bingo now.
Here it is. Hello?
Hi, talk to me.
You forgot my birthday.
Who's this?
Did y ou know y ou're the only dad who plays with every kid but me?
Gabriel?
Cut to the audience.
We're calling a cartoon, Augusto.
Go and cheer the audience up!
Do you feel better, son?
You need to rest.
My Countess.
The Countess.
They invited Lolita to play her.
It's probably another character.
No, it's not.
It's her.
I'm going to write a show with an Italian Countess...
-No. - ...just for you, Marta .
You'll be the most beautiful Countess in TV history.
Augusto and Marta Mendes finally together in a show.
What do you say?
My Countess,
how can I be of service?
What are y ou saying?
You have the most beautiful smile.
How dare y ou?
How dare y ou speak like that to y our boss?
I don't care.
-I'm in love with y ou. -No.
I'm old.
- Yes. -No.
What could y ou possibly want with me?
Your heart.
And nothing else.
-No. - Yes.
- Yes. Yes. -No.
No.
Hey, buddy. Play this song next. B-side.
It's ready to be played .
Hi, Tereza ... Sorry, my mistake.
-Hi, master. -How are you?
Did Lucia tell you about my idea?
She was just telling me about it.
Do you understand the size of it? We need to get it right into the audience.
It's a soap opera with a spicy humor.
Hot vs Mild, what do you think?
It's a different idea .
C'mon, we used to sleep in caves
when a bearded guy walked in with a torch on fire.
Talk about being different.
There it is, intelligence in its truest form .
We could try. I'll run it by the sponsors
-and see how they react to it. -That's my boy!
Let's make a toast!
A toast with this fine champagne.
-C'mon, Lucia . -No.
-She doesn't... -Yes, we're toasting .
This is a special moment. Here, a toast.
To prime time with no masks.
Life's not a joke, huh?
Let's dance, people! Let's get this party going !
Hi, y ou just called Augusto Mendes. Leave y our message and don't lose hope.
Dad, y ou were supposed to pick me up from school. Where are y ou?
Augusto, call me as soon as y ou get this message. It's urgent.
Where were you?
I came for Gabriel.
You were supposed to pick him up on Friday.
Did you hear about your mother?
Everybody was looking for you .
The actress and talent show judge Marta Mendes passed away y esterday.
It's believed to have been a heart attack.
Marta was known for her work in theater, radio and cinema
and as a talent show judge for the past 1 0 y ears.
The funeral will be this afternoon at the Silvio Correia Theater.
Lucia .
Lucia . Help me.
I want my mother back.
Honey, I'm so sorry. Why did you close...
-The show is over. -Please, Augusto.
We were friends with your mom for so long .
I haven't seen any friends at her place in the past 10 years.
You let a diva rot
on that crappy talent show.
You killed my mother.
You murdered her.
You're a murderer, you killed her sparkle!
Now you want to take a picture crying over her casket?
No fucking way!
That's right, it's over. You can go now.
You're a bunch of vultures!
Butchers!
We're back on in two.
I'm back!
Bingo is back!
Augusto, you forgot the nose.
Cut to the audience.
You forgot to mention the soda .
Who's thirsty here?
Who's thirsty here?
Bingo! Bingo! Bingo! Bingo!
Good morning .
Good morning .
Augusto.
Count on me.
It's all good .
It wasn't her fault.
I'm coming .
Let's rehearse.
Light the central grid .
K. nock, knock?
Is the vegetarian fox home?
Why are you like that?
I'm not Bingo anymore.
Bingo's an idiot anyway.
I can't believe you got my son drunk, you bastard !
I woke up and he was throwing up.
I'll have a doctor examine him .
You won't touch him again until you stop drinking .
-You're nervous. Calm down . -Idiot.
Let's go to the hospital.
-Enough . -Idiot.
Get out!
Thank you very much .
Come, son .
He's fine, don't worry.
Lucia?
Lucia .
You wouldn't deny a dying man's wish .
It depends.
Where's that Lucia with her hair down?
I'll let it down when you earn it.
Wait, I'll get it for you .
Hi. Yes, you can .
I need a bottle of wine and two crystal glasses.
I'm sorry.
It's fine, we don't need anything .
Wasn't the kiss of death enough for you?
I almost died, right?
I hope it helps you change your ways.
It's easier to empty the sea with a bucket.
Do you want help with your bucket?
-What are y ou doing here?
-Did n't y ou get the subpoena?
I want to see my son .
If y ou don't present proof of a 6-month sobriety,
you won't come near my son .
You won't see my son.
If y ou come within a block from him, I'll have y ou arrested.
Thanks.
I know y ou're all thinking. ''Easier said than done''.
But I've drunk more than all of you here.
I know what it means to fight a battle a day.
So I would like each of you to tell us
the hardest moment of your day.
Can you start, Augusto?
I miss
my mother,
my son
and the stage.
That's all.
But why the stage?
Because without it, I'm nothing.
I can be wherever I want,
I can be whoever I want.
U nder the spotlight...
I can do everything.
-Hi. Gabriel Mendes?
-Yes. -He's coming .
It's the only thing I know how to do.
It doesn't matter where.
C'mon, Baron .
Wherever there is a spotlight,
is where my stage is.
Shoot him, not me.
This person here
is Augusto Mendes.
A worker at the service of art.
Tonight I'd like these lights to come on .
Because the show
is about to begin .
Me abandoning the stage
would be very unfair to the world .
Thank you .
Thank you .
Thank you .
This film is based on the life of Arlindo Barreto.
Arlindo Barreto starred in several soft-core pornography movies.
Arlindo Barreto starred in 5 soap-operas.
Arlindo Barreto was married with the program's producer.
Arlindo Barreto is the coolest father in the universe.
He has been performing in churches for 25 years, dressed as a clown .
THE KING OF THE MORNINGS
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