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1
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Someone's going to have to tell
the Witchfinder General
2
00:00:04,320 --> 00:00:05,920
he's going to need
a new right-hand man.
3
00:00:05,960 --> 00:00:07,960
I need to take the suspect
to the Court of Assizes.
4
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:10,440
And you won't even let me go?
Why on earth would I agree to that?
5
00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:12,280
Because you can't get
to Chelmsford in time.
6
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:14,680
We'll be there on time.
In fact, we'll be there later today.
7
00:00:14,720 --> 00:00:17,160
Captain, we weren't expecting you
so soon. Captain?
8
00:00:17,200 --> 00:00:18,760
That's John Stearne. Was.
9
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:19,800
That's John Was.
10
00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:21,760
Why do your eyes keep flicking
over there?
11
00:00:21,800 --> 00:00:23,160
We need to go over the bridge
12
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:25,480
and thought I might...
look at the bridge.
13
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:27,840
Careful! She could cast a hex
on any one of you.
14
00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:29,000
Blow the bridge!
15
00:00:29,040 --> 00:00:30,360
Aah!
16
00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:42,240
This is not catastrophic,
this is...manageable.
17
00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:44,800
If you could eat
anything you wanted right now,
18
00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:46,680
what would you eat, do you think?
19
00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:48,320
Plenty of villages beyond
these trees -
20
00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:50,520
get to one of them, borrow a couple
of horses, off we go.
21
00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:52,640
We should be in Chelmsford
marginally after dark.
22
00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:55,120
Like, if I was a witch
and I could cast a food spell
23
00:00:55,160 --> 00:00:56,920
and you could eat
anything you wanted to,
24
00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:58,800
what would you eat right now,
do you think?
25
00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:00,600
Just need to get through
this forest -
26
00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:03,440
which isn't really a forest,
if I'm honest. It's more of a wood.
27
00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:04,960
Well, it's a thicket, isn't it?
28
00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:07,120
It's copse. I'd have a bag pudding.
29
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:08,800
What are you talking about?
30
00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:11,360
I was just talking about,
if you could eat anything right now,
31
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:13,960
what would you eat, do you think?
Just to sort of pass the time.
32
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:17,600
Yes, you can pass the time
by examining the woodland.
33
00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:19,960
Or your conscience.
Nothing wrong with my conscience.
34
00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:21,800
Just have to borrow
a couple of horses
35
00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,400
once we get to the Vale of Dedham.
Dedham Vale?
36
00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:26,640
Are you joking?
I'm not going through Dedham Vale!
37
00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:28,080
You ARE going through Dedham Vale.
38
00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:30,040
You're a prisoner, and you'll do
as you're told.
39
00:01:30,080 --> 00:01:32,480
No-one goes through Dedham Vale.
My dad told me all about it.
40
00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:34,400
They've lost their minds.
41
00:01:34,440 --> 00:01:36,120
A man lost his daughters in there,
42
00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:39,120
who went in there to sell cakes,
and they never came back.
43
00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:41,920
Well, we don't know that they came
to any harm. Where'd they go, then?
44
00:01:41,960 --> 00:01:44,200
Well, maybe they met some brothers
and settled down.
45
00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:45,240
There were six of them.
46
00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:47,120
Maybe they met six brothers.
I don't think so.
47
00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:49,320
We're talking about Suffolk.
They have big families.
48
00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:50,880
HORSE WHINNIES
49
00:01:50,920 --> 00:01:52,440
OK. Let's go. Come on, let's go!
50
00:01:52,480 --> 00:01:54,120
Excuse me, swan. Sorry.
51
00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:55,680
Madam! Stop!
52
00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:57,080
Stop.
53
00:02:00,040 --> 00:02:01,480
Where are you going?
54
00:02:01,520 --> 00:02:04,760
South. South!
Now, are you going near Chelmsford?
55
00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:06,320
We're going to Chelmsford.
56
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:09,000
Ooh! This is ideal.
57
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:10,120
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
58
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:12,880
Is that to me or the horse?
I'll need my costs covered.
59
00:02:12,920 --> 00:02:16,360
Your costs? But you're going there
anyway, aren't you?
60
00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:19,240
So there ARE no costs -
and besides, we have no money.
61
00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:21,200
Then, just give us
a bit of your honey.
62
00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:22,720
Well... What?
63
00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:27,120
This is stealing.
64
00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:29,280
Dad always said, don't look
a gift horse in the mouth.
65
00:02:29,320 --> 00:02:31,120
This is not a gift horse.
66
00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:34,000
This is just a horse who has
left its mouth unattended.
67
00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:36,400
Smoke, look.
68
00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:37,680
Right...
69
00:02:40,000 --> 00:02:41,560
Let's do the job properly.
70
00:02:45,080 --> 00:02:46,840
OK. OK.
71
00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:48,120
Someone's coming!
72
00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:49,760
MAN: Oi! What the fuck
are you doing?
73
00:02:49,800 --> 00:02:51,600
Have you been in the hive? No.
74
00:02:51,640 --> 00:02:53,320
If you've touched my bees,
75
00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:56,800
I'll shove them up your arse
one by one, like rosary beads.
76
00:02:58,640 --> 00:03:00,720
You definitely haven't touched them?
77
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:02,640
No. We were...
78
00:03:02,680 --> 00:03:04,240
..just looking at them.
79
00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:05,600
Quite unusual.
80
00:03:05,640 --> 00:03:08,120
Bollocks. Unusual!
81
00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:09,760
What's unusual about them?
82
00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:12,760
Well, your skeps
are made from willow.
83
00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:14,760
Skeps? Yeah.
84
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,560
What do you know about skeps?
85
00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:21,080
Well, usually you would reinforce
the base with hazel,
86
00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:23,640
but you've opted to use willow,
87
00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:26,560
presumably to stop them warping
in the wet weather.
88
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:28,200
I have, yeah.
89
00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:30,280
But it's not reinforcing the base,
is it?
90
00:03:30,320 --> 00:03:32,320
It's called sp... Splitting.
91
00:03:32,360 --> 00:03:34,640
Sorry, our smoke scared your bees.
92
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,920
Scared them?
No, the smoke doesn't scare them.
93
00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:38,440
No, it quells them.
94
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:40,120
If you'd scared them, you'd know it.
95
00:03:40,160 --> 00:03:42,480
Oh, yes, you would!
THEY CHUCKLE
96
00:03:42,520 --> 00:03:44,840
Do you tend to these every day,
or...? I do, yeah.
97
00:03:44,880 --> 00:03:47,880
You know, I mean, I know we're not
supposed to work on the Sabbath,
98
00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:49,520
but... Try telling the bees that.
99
00:03:49,560 --> 00:03:50,800
HE LAUGHS
100
00:03:52,640 --> 00:03:54,160
This is nice, isn't it?
101
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:57,840
Just two men having a nice chat
about bees.
102
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:07,440
You have the softest elderly hands
I've ever held.
103
00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,760
It's just a knob of butter
in the morning.
104
00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:11,560
You butter your hands? Yeah.
105
00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,560
You butter your hands.
106
00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:14,960
That's right.
107
00:04:15,000 --> 00:04:16,960
Well, it works beautifully.
108
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:22,080
Now, are you going to tell me
what's upset you?
109
00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:26,520
They're saying that it was Master
Gideon that killed Mr Stearne.
110
00:04:26,560 --> 00:04:29,960
Then, you must go and warn him.
Godspeed and good luck.
111
00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:31,360
Cumberlidge.
112
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:32,600
We ride for Cromer in an hour,
113
00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:34,400
so the horses will need
a belly full of hay
114
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,200
and a going-over
with the dandy brush.
115
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:38,520
You could do with a couple
of strokes yourself.
116
00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:40,280
I don't have a horse.
117
00:04:40,320 --> 00:04:41,960
You don't have a horse?
118
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,360
Then, yours is a thorny task indeed.
119
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:47,480
I will say, do find him.
120
00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:51,360
I remember my father was
wrongly accused of poaching.
121
00:04:51,400 --> 00:04:53,880
I tried to reach him
before the gamekeepers did.
122
00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:57,000
Did you find him?
Oh, yes. Oh, thank goodness.
123
00:04:57,040 --> 00:04:59,040
Dead. Moments too late.
124
00:05:00,520 --> 00:05:03,440
What I wouldn't give
to right that wrong.
125
00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:04,840
Still.
126
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:08,960
If... If you want to,
you could help me find my master.
127
00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:11,560
Oh... Oh, we'd be happy to.
128
00:05:12,840 --> 00:05:15,320
I could do for Bannister
what I could never do for my father.
129
00:05:15,360 --> 00:05:16,680
You just tell me where he's gone.
130
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:18,520
Ch...
131
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:19,840
Ch...?
132
00:05:21,040 --> 00:05:23,920
Oh, you promised not to.
133
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:26,120
Oh, Alice, bless you.
134
00:05:26,160 --> 00:05:28,360
Promises are so important,
aren't they?
135
00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:30,280
I will not violate my covenant
136
00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:33,000
or alter the word that went forth
from my lips.
137
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:35,400
Psalms. Psalms.
138
00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:38,600
So, what if I say where he's gone?
139
00:05:38,640 --> 00:05:40,760
Then, you won't have been the one
to tell me.
140
00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:43,560
Your promise will be intact,
and we can save that life of his.
141
00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:46,760
You just tell me if I'm right.
142
00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:51,040
Chorley. Chelmsford.
143
00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:53,240
Cheltenham. Chesham.
144
00:05:53,280 --> 00:05:55,280
Chadderton. Chiddingly.
145
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:57,280
Chard. Chelsea.
146
00:05:57,320 --> 00:05:59,880
Charlbury. Chatham. Chatteris.
147
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:01,480
Cheshunt. Chester.
148
00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:04,840
Chesterfield. Chester-le-Street.
Chagford. Chaddesley Corbett.
149
00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:06,640
Charlwood. Cheadle. Cheddar.
150
00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:08,160
Chinnor. Chichester. Chippenham.
151
00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:09,720
Chipping Campden. Chipping Norton.
152
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:11,800
Chipping Ongar. Chipping Sodbury.
None of those?
153
00:06:11,840 --> 00:06:12,960
The second one.
154
00:06:17,400 --> 00:06:18,760
Such lovely hands.
155
00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:21,800
Come along, Alice.
156
00:06:25,040 --> 00:06:27,200
Nice of him to give us that honey.
157
00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:29,480
For people that keep bumblebees
as slaves,
158
00:06:29,520 --> 00:06:32,440
I think the beekeepers
are actually quite nice.
159
00:06:32,480 --> 00:06:33,920
You met many beekeepers?
160
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:36,200
No. Beekeepers are odd.
161
00:06:36,240 --> 00:06:38,000
I thought your dad was a beekeeper.
162
00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:39,680
Bee people are all the same!
163
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:41,520
"Ooh, that's a very nice honey.
164
00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:44,160
"Ooh, try this honey.
Smell the honey!
165
00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,040
"Ooh, that's lovely honey, that is."
166
00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:48,560
Tedious, tedious.
167
00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:51,800
Their relentless veneration of bees.
168
00:06:51,840 --> 00:06:54,560
I dunno, whatever makes you happy,
I say.
169
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:56,320
Name a famous beekeeper.
170
00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:57,480
Um...
171
00:06:57,520 --> 00:06:59,560
I'm waiting.
172
00:06:59,600 --> 00:07:00,680
There aren't any.
173
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:04,720
You can't get rich or decorated
by keeping bees.
174
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:07,080
You could be rich in other ways,
besides money.
175
00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:11,240
Yes, well, I want to be rich
in other ways AND money.
176
00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:13,640
You're a witchfinder. I am.
177
00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:15,800
My lad's a bit of a witchfinder,
aren't you, lad?
178
00:07:15,840 --> 00:07:17,320
A bit of a witchfinder?
179
00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:18,720
You'll have to watch yourself.
180
00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:20,120
I shall have to remember that!
181
00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:21,800
He's found two now.
182
00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:23,080
Local girls, like.
183
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:24,680
Knows all the questions.
184
00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:26,760
Then again, it's just a bit
of common sense, innit?
185
00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:29,200
Well, no - you have to be able
to read for a start.
186
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:30,520
I can read.
187
00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:32,320
Oh, I bet you read nicely.
188
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:34,920
SHE GASPS
You could teach ME to read one day!
189
00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:40,440
"An observation of the study of the
nature of the foulness of witches.
190
00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:41,880
"For Dorothy."
191
00:07:41,920 --> 00:07:44,840
Oh, no, it's a summons from
the court in Chelmsford.
192
00:07:44,880 --> 00:07:47,560
It doesn't say Chelmsford on here.
Or court.
193
00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:51,800
Well, I've read Malleus Maleficarum
in Latin.
194
00:07:51,840 --> 00:07:53,880
Mm! I wonder whether your boy
has done that.
195
00:07:53,920 --> 00:07:56,320
Might have. What about Daemonologie?
196
00:07:56,360 --> 00:07:57,720
Um... Um...
197
00:07:57,760 --> 00:07:58,920
Yes or no?
198
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,200
Yes, then. And Stercus Equi? Yeah.
199
00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:04,160
Even though it doesn't exist,
and it means horse shit in Latin?!
200
00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:05,320
Oh!
201
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:06,840
THUD
202
00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:08,680
No! No, stop the cart!
203
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:09,960
Stop the cart!
204
00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:12,640
Gooch! Oi! Gooch!
205
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,040
One more step!
206
00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:23,440
One more step, and I will put a hex
on you - I mean it!
207
00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:26,080
Argh!
208
00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:27,400
Oh!
209
00:08:27,440 --> 00:08:29,240
Argh!
210
00:08:29,280 --> 00:08:32,160
Right, you! Aah! You!
211
00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:33,880
Argh!
212
00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:38,400
I was never summoned to Chelmsford.
213
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:39,800
There's no letter. So what?
214
00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,320
In Chelmsford, you get to be tried
215
00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:43,160
away from the lunatics
in your hometown,
216
00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:44,720
and I get to offer my services
217
00:08:44,760 --> 00:08:47,200
as the right-hand man
to the Witchfinder General.
218
00:08:47,240 --> 00:08:49,640
This is what this is all about?
219
00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:51,440
A job?
220
00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:55,760
You are so obsessed with people
thinking you're important!
221
00:08:55,800 --> 00:08:57,760
I care what people think.
222
00:08:57,800 --> 00:08:58,920
That's all.
223
00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:01,120
And maybe if you would do that
once in a while,
224
00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:02,840
rather than just articulating
anything
225
00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:04,240
that comes into your head... Oh!
226
00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:06,800
..then maybe you wouldn't be
in this pickle in the first place.
227
00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:09,640
Don't you dare.
People are frightened.
228
00:09:09,680 --> 00:09:12,600
Yeah. They think the devil
walks amongst them!
229
00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:13,960
They want certainty.
230
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:18,080
Now, anyone with half a brain
would notice that,
231
00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:20,120
and would try and fit in,
232
00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,880
would try and be like other people -
but not you.
233
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:26,080
You spend all your time down the
tavern, you rile your neighbours.
234
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:28,720
You ask constant,
constant questions.
235
00:09:28,760 --> 00:09:32,480
I don't just accept what the men
in the fancy hats tell me!
236
00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,760
Yeah, well, LET ME TELL...!
237
00:09:34,800 --> 00:09:36,320
Let me tell you something.
238
00:09:36,360 --> 00:09:41,080
It's the people in the nice hats
that make all the big decisions.
239
00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:42,400
Now, someone like...
240
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:45,760
What? You don't think I'm a witch.
241
00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:47,320
I haven't said that, who said that?
242
00:09:47,360 --> 00:09:48,640
Why didn't you stay back? When?
243
00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:51,360
When I threatened to put a hex on
you before, you didn't even flinch.
244
00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:53,720
I did. I remember feeling
intense fear
245
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:56,120
before asking the Lord
to give me courage.
246
00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:57,480
You dived on me straight away.
247
00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:00,400
I pray very quickly.
For the sake of your career,
248
00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:03,280
you would convict an innocent woman.
249
00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:04,680
I'm not convicting anyone.
250
00:10:04,720 --> 00:10:08,040
That is for the court to decide.
I am merely a...
251
00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,760
..conduit would be the wrong word,
but... Just a horrible man.
252
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:14,080
Yes, and you're my prisoner.
253
00:10:15,880 --> 00:10:17,280
So, we're going.
254
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:21,680
Give me the map.
255
00:10:21,720 --> 00:10:23,160
Give me the map. Mm-mm.
256
00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:24,480
Give me the map. No.
257
00:10:24,520 --> 00:10:27,040
I'm not going through Dedham Vale,
it's got the word "dead" in it.
258
00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:29,640
Yes, it's also got the word "ham"
in it.
259
00:10:30,640 --> 00:10:32,840
Yeah. Well, good luck
getting that down.
260
00:10:32,880 --> 00:10:35,560
You'd have more chance swallowing
your bloody mouth, honestly.
261
00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:37,600
Can't wait to see you get THAT down.
262
00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:39,240
You're not getting that down.
263
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:41,560
Are you getting that down?
264
00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,880
Don't get that down!
265
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:45,720
Stop getting it down!
266
00:10:47,040 --> 00:10:48,360
Is it down?
267
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:51,840
That's unbelievable.
268
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:55,440
Let's head for the trees.
269
00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:56,880
Bugger me!
270
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:03,360
Footprints.
People have been this way.
271
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:05,120
Yeah. Us, an hour ago.
272
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:08,880
Right, we're camping.
273
00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:11,080
And you can extinguish that look,
thank you very much.
274
00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:12,880
We're still going to Chelmsford
tomorrow.
275
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,000
I was always told it's dangerous
to stay out at night
276
00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:16,840
in case of highwaymen.
277
00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:18,360
Can you see any highways?
278
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:21,600
Highwaymen don't just rob
on highways.
279
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:24,800
Yes, but highwaymen mainly rob
on highways,
280
00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:27,400
just like dung beetles
don't just eat dung.
281
00:11:27,440 --> 00:11:29,840
If they find an old leaf
that tastes shitty enough,
282
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:30,960
they'll eat that too -
283
00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:32,960
but they're called dung beetles
284
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:34,840
because they MAINLY eat dung.
285
00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:36,800
SIGHS: Right...
286
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:39,960
Have you done much camping?
287
00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:48,600
QUIETLY: The rabbit is a wily foe...
288
00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:53,560
..but if I stay completely still...
289
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:56,800
..I will hear him coming...
290
00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:01,480
..long before he reaches the exit...
291
00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,880
..giving me that crucial...
292
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:09,720
..split-second advantage...
293
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:12,920
..needed...
RUSTLING
294
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:14,040
THUD
That's fine.
295
00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:15,560
{\an8}Let him go, let him go.
296
00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:17,480
{\an8}Do you think? Mm-hm.
297
00:12:19,040 --> 00:12:20,960
{\an8}Always let the first one go.
298
00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:24,680
{\an8}Mark of respect between hunter...
RUSTLING
299
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:26,280
{\an8}THUD
..and hunted.
300
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:28,760
{\an8}Again, fine.
301
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:30,480
{\an8}Let him go, let him go?
302
00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:36,240
{\an8}We had not yet commenced
the hunt proper.
303
00:12:37,920 --> 00:12:39,480
We shall do so now.
304
00:12:40,640 --> 00:12:42,280
RUSTLING, THUD
305
00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:43,520
RUSTLING, THUD
306
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:46,320
RUSTLING, THUD
307
00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:50,440
RUSTLING, THUD
308
00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:52,880
RUSTLING
309
00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:59,960
Funny how if you just bend down
and pick one up, they just let you.
310
00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:02,520
Possibly cotignac. Cotignac?
311
00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:06,360
You were asking earlier what I would
eat if I could have anything I like.
312
00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:08,360
Bread with cotignac.
313
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:10,920
It's a quince paste
made with lemon and sugar.
314
00:13:10,960 --> 00:13:12,920
I love jam. It's not a jam!
315
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:15,360
It's an exquisite local delicacy
in Provence.
316
00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:18,960
In France.
317
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:21,680
Unusual for something
to be exquisite AND local.
318
00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:25,560
Um, no. Normally if something is
exquisite, it doesn't stay local.
319
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:27,200
We all end up eating it -
320
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:28,760
and if it's still local,
321
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:31,720
it's probably not going to be
that exquisite.
322
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:34,080
Is that where you had cotignac -
France?
323
00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:35,320
No, it's not.
324
00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:40,520
I had it at a dinner
with the Archbishop of Norfolk
325
00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:43,400
and several other leading figures
of East Anglia.
326
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:44,680
I sampled the cotignac,
327
00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:48,760
and I was possibly too boisterous
in my praise.
328
00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:54,520
Ended up lodging a pheasant's
wishbone in the old throat.
329
00:13:54,560 --> 00:13:56,800
Had to be helped away.
330
00:13:56,840 --> 00:13:58,400
I wasn't asked back.
331
00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:03,320
HE PLAYS MELODY
332
00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:05,040
That's sad.
333
00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:06,840
It IS sad. Yes.
334
00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:10,920
I've come to refer to it
as the wishbone moment.
335
00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:12,800
Not just because I choked on one,
336
00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:17,120
but also because
when one pictures a wishbone,
337
00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:21,400
there is a long, thin
single bone...
338
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:24,360
..if you like,
my life up until that moment...
339
00:14:24,400 --> 00:14:28,480
..and then the bone bisects
into two prongs.
340
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:31,760
Now, one of these is the
less-than-successful path
341
00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:35,920
my life took after that moment,
involving small rooms in taverns
342
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:38,800
and people who like bag pudding.
343
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:40,760
The other prong?
344
00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,680
That's the life I should have had.
345
00:14:42,720 --> 00:14:44,920
Renown, acclaim...
346
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:48,200
So, yes, it is sad.
I meant the tune.
347
00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:49,360
Oh, right. Well...
348
00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:53,560
I will be playing an altogether
more jaunty number tomorrow
349
00:14:53,600 --> 00:14:56,080
after meeting
the Witchfinder General.
350
00:14:56,120 --> 00:14:58,600
HE PLAYS MELODY
351
00:14:58,640 --> 00:15:01,000
Do you know
Are You Sleeping, Brother John?
352
00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:03,440
Mm-hm. Because we could do that
in the round.
353
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:04,640
There's two of us.
354
00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,880
Didn't he ban music?
355
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,760
That Puritan you like.
356
00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:13,640
Oliver Cromwell.
357
00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:25,160
# If you be a man of noble fame
358
00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,600
# Then tell me-o the father's name
359
00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:30,120
# At the well below the valley-o
360
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,200
# Green grow the lily-o
361
00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:34,960
# Right among the bushes-o... #
362
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:37,600
Ahem.
363
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:42,840
# Two of them... #
Outstanding, Alice.
364
00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:45,120
I could listen to you sing
all day... Well, thank you!
365
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:49,200
..and in a way I feel I have.
Your master is a lucky man indeed.
366
00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:51,120
He doesn't much care for my singing.
367
00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:54,280
Well, he should try listening
to Cumberlidge for entertainment.
368
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,720
I'd get better conversation
if I put the bridle on him
369
00:15:56,760 --> 00:15:58,120
and had the horse sit up here!
370
00:15:58,160 --> 00:16:00,320
# There's two of them by... #
That being said,
371
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:03,560
I do wonder if we shouldn't put
the singing to one side.
372
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:06,680
We'd hate to be in the throes
of musical ecstasy
373
00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:09,720
and miss a clue as to which way
he journeyed.
374
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:11,920
Well, I can tell you
which way he's gone.
375
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:15,320
You can...you can see
from the horse droppings.
376
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,040
These could be
anyone's horse droppings.
377
00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:18,360
Well, THOSE could be anyone's,
378
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:20,320
but these on the left,
they're Master Gideon's.
379
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:21,880
You can tell,
cos they're a bit purply,
380
00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:24,520
and he feeds his horse beetroot.
Why does he feed them beetroot?
381
00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:25,840
So they do purple shits.
382
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,960
Quite the sleuth.
Like a bloodhound tracking a fox.
383
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:30,920
Or a pig snuffling for truffles.
384
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:33,880
Ooh! It's a bit like truffling
for snuffles, isn't it?
385
00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:36,240
Yeah. We must hurry.
Cumberlidge, off.
386
00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:39,200
Give the horse a fighting chance.
You can trot alongside.
387
00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:48,040
Haven't been camping in ages.
388
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:51,280
I suppose women aren't allowed to
any more.
389
00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:52,960
Yes, they are. Of course they are.
390
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:55,480
Meet in the woods - must be a coven.
391
00:16:55,520 --> 00:16:57,640
Pick flowers -
she's making a potion.
392
00:16:57,680 --> 00:17:00,040
Swim in a river -
why does she float?
393
00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:03,480
I used to love swimming.
394
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:06,800
My dad always says... I think that's
enough talking now, don't you?
395
00:17:06,840 --> 00:17:08,480
Nothing wrong with talking.
396
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:11,680
My dad says it's the only thing
that separates us from animals.
397
00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:13,160
Not true. Clothes.
398
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:16,920
My dad also says... Your dad also
says, your dad also says!
399
00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:20,400
Your dad does a lot of saying,
doesn't he?
400
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:22,520
But not a great deal of being there
401
00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:25,240
when his daughter is accused
of witchery.
402
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,520
Well, he went away.
403
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:28,960
When I was younger,
there was a bad harvest.
404
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,320
He went to get work.
So now he's migratory, is he?
405
00:17:31,360 --> 00:17:33,280
Flying off to sunnier climes,
406
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:37,000
flapping his big old wings,
soaring off to Lowestoft?
407
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:38,480
HE SQUAWKS
408
00:17:40,720 --> 00:17:43,760
Well, he didn't want us relying
on the parish.
409
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:47,280
Comments as you go by,
wiping spit off the door.
410
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,720
So he went away.
411
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:51,520
Last time I checked, families
were supposed to stay together.
412
00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,280
We will be in one place.
413
00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:54,920
He's found work now.
414
00:17:54,960 --> 00:17:57,880
Oh! Says so in his letters.
Which you can't read.
415
00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,480
Mum's friend can read,
and Mum would tell me -
416
00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:02,320
till the pox took her last winter.
417
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:07,400
Do you think that he'd be writing
me letters if he deserted me?
418
00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:09,040
I don't know. No.
419
00:18:10,720 --> 00:18:14,120
You know, it's not healthy to set
so much store in other people.
420
00:18:15,760 --> 00:18:17,240
Rely on oneself.
421
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:20,200
Pull up the drawbridge.
422
00:18:20,240 --> 00:18:23,240
What if you love someone? Don't.
423
00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:24,840
I don't.
424
00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:27,640
You don't know what it means.
I do know this -
425
00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:29,840
everybody has attachments.
426
00:18:29,880 --> 00:18:33,200
Parents they've lost,
or a dog that ran away
427
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:37,600
or a fiancee who backed out with
four weeks to go before the wedding.
428
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:40,240
You can't dwell on the Christmases
you spent together,
429
00:18:40,280 --> 00:18:43,360
the long walks, stroking her face
with the back of your hand.
430
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:45,200
"Oh, you've got smooth knuckles.
431
00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,440
"I'm going to call you Smuckles."
432
00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:49,040
You can't wallow in it.
433
00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:51,920
You're from the wrong stock,
draw a line, move on.
434
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:53,760
Bye-bye.
435
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:56,000
What was her name?
436
00:18:56,040 --> 00:18:58,720
Long time ago. I don't know.
Something like Dorothy.
437
00:18:58,760 --> 00:19:01,800
So, Dorothy, then.
Yeah, it was Dorothy. Yeah.
438
00:19:03,720 --> 00:19:05,200
You not having your bunny?
439
00:19:05,240 --> 00:19:07,160
I'm all right. I had that map.
440
00:19:07,200 --> 00:19:08,840
Let's tie you up.
441
00:19:12,800 --> 00:19:14,160
BIRDSONG
442
00:19:16,320 --> 00:19:18,120
DISTANT CHATTER
443
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:32,240
Come on, Gooch. Up. Gooch! Gooch!
444
00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:34,280
Up! I can hear people. Oh...
445
00:19:34,320 --> 00:19:36,280
There must be a village.
446
00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:38,040
Come on, Gooch, let's go.
447
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,480
Come on. Through here.
448
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:44,120
HE SNIFFS
You smell that?
449
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:45,680
That'll be sausages.
450
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:47,320
That's Dedham Vale?
451
00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:48,720
Well, what did you expect?
452
00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:51,880
Jackals roaming the street?
Dead babies on spikes?
453
00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:53,880
Lucifer manning the cider stall?
HE CHUCKLES
454
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,040
Well, I don't know,
I just got so many stories
455
00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:58,600
about how everybody just went
completely berserk.
456
00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:02,360
Where do the stories come from?
Your father. And half the tavern.
457
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:04,960
Like June Roscoe and Old Dim Dyke.
458
00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:07,280
Here we go.
Randy Tom. Henry with the eye.
459
00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:08,680
Henry with the hair.
460
00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:11,400
Bobby Four-tits and half the lads
at the tannery.
461
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:13,720
Honestly, I hate to disagree
with Randy, Tom,
462
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:16,160
or any of the Four-tits family,
but look for yourself.
463
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:17,440
I might just go and ask.
464
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:19,640
No, you won't just do anything.
465
00:20:19,680 --> 00:20:22,040
You're going to stay out the way.
Come on.
466
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:23,240
I will go over there.
467
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:25,000
I will have a lovely breakfast
468
00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:28,840
and then I will use my standing to
secure the loan of a cart and horse
469
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:31,520
to get us to Chelmsford today,
ready for the trial tomorrow.
470
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:34,160
Any sausages for me?
471
00:20:34,200 --> 00:20:35,800
I shouldn't have thought so.
472
00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:41,320
Good morning!
473
00:20:41,360 --> 00:20:42,600
Are your parents about?
474
00:20:44,120 --> 00:20:46,080
I love children.
475
00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:47,280
Hello?
476
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:48,640
Hello!
477
00:20:51,800 --> 00:20:54,280
Do we know if this horse is taken?
478
00:20:55,560 --> 00:20:58,160
Do we know if horsey likes apples?
479
00:20:59,280 --> 00:21:00,840
Hello?
480
00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:05,320
Daylight robbery. Ah! No.
481
00:21:05,360 --> 00:21:07,040
The price of a good horse today. Oh.
482
00:21:07,080 --> 00:21:09,880
Mind you, that one's just a pony
and it gets terrible sore throats.
483
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,240
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Oh, it's fine.
484
00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:13,920
It's just a little HOARSE.
485
00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:15,920
Oh!
THEY LAUGH
486
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:16,960
Wonderful!
487
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:18,280
Really strong.
488
00:21:18,320 --> 00:21:21,520
The pony doesn't think so -
but then they are NEIGH sayers.
489
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:23,240
That's another one!
490
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:24,640
That's two horse jokes.
491
00:21:24,680 --> 00:21:25,920
Helena Jennings.
492
00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:30,720
Gideon Bannister. Gideon, eh?
Oh, a fine Biblical name. Yes.
493
00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:33,160
Commanded by God
to defeat the Midianites.
494
00:21:33,200 --> 00:21:34,960
Well, if I see one!
HE LAUGHS
495
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:37,120
No, but ARE you a man of God?
I try to be.
496
00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:39,920
I'm actually transporting...
James! He's one of our lot.
497
00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:43,640
Minister Jennings,
cleric of our little parish.
498
00:21:43,680 --> 00:21:46,080
So, there are people here, then.
Yes. Yes.
499
00:21:46,120 --> 00:21:47,920
Well, you've met my wife.
The comedian.
500
00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:49,760
Hah! Giving you the horse jokes,
was she?
501
00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:51,480
Yes, both of them. Oh, I know!
502
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:53,800
Puritans ought not to entertain
frivolity... Mm-hm.
503
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:56,600
..but we're not really the
finger-wagging types in Dedham Vale.
504
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:58,280
Well, this is splendid.
505
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,360
A new friend,
and a man of good stock.
506
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:03,240
I saw you looking at the horse.
Are you in need of one?
507
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,640
Yes, that's my MANE concern.
508
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:07,680
Little horse joke for you.
509
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:09,480
But of course! Absolutely.
510
00:22:09,520 --> 00:22:12,080
A good puritan like you -
more than welcome.
511
00:22:12,120 --> 00:22:14,240
But first you must stay
and enjoy the feast.
512
00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:15,760
Ooh, a feast!
513
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:19,360
Now, then! I don't mind a feast.
514
00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:20,480
Do you know what?
515
00:22:20,520 --> 00:22:22,520
Some people warned me
not to come through here.
516
00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:25,040
LAUGHS: Dedham Vale?!
Dedham Vale!
517
00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:27,120
There's no safer place in England!
518
00:22:27,160 --> 00:22:28,800
Of course not!
519
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:50,760
TWIG SNAPS
520
00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:54,640
Oh, this place is fantastic.
521
00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:57,000
We should get the feast started.
Oh, wonderful.
522
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,440
What are we having?
Having? Sausages, by any chance?
523
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:02,800
Oh, no, it's more of a feast
of renewal than a feast-feast.
524
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:05,360
Please! I have children! Please!
525
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:08,080
Wh...? We generally hang them,
526
00:23:08,120 --> 00:23:10,480
but the occasional bonfire serves
as a warning to others.
527
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:12,000
Susan was arrested this morning.
528
00:23:12,040 --> 00:23:14,760
It was said that she muttered
a malediction to Lorna Pierce.
529
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:17,160
Only arrested this morning?
And already tried?
530
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:20,120
Oh, we don't much worry about
trials. Best not to dilly-dally.
531
00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:22,560
When the locals identify a witch,
that's good enough for us.
532
00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:25,160
When the people of Sodom
and Gomorrah committed abominations,
533
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,240
God didn't initiate
court proceedings.
534
00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:29,280
He rained burning sulphur upon them.
535
00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:31,760
Which is why, when we get a witch,
we like to pop her on the fire.
536
00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:34,800
The devil's daughter must be put
to slaughter. What a lovely rhyme.
537
00:23:34,840 --> 00:23:36,800
Yes! Peter makes them up for us.
538
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:38,600
He's our resident Shakespeare.
539
00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:40,880
I can see that. Now...
540
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:43,560
..would you care to be today's
starter of the flame, Mr Bannister?
541
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:45,160
SHE SCREAMS
542
00:23:45,200 --> 00:23:46,440
Flame?
543
00:23:57,720 --> 00:23:59,520
Oh, there they are!
544
00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:01,640
I was meant to bury those witches
a week ago.
545
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:03,200
You know when you just can't
remember
546
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:04,680
what you've done with something?
547
00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:06,480
So, what are you doing here?
548
00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:09,440
I thought I'd just sort of guard
them. Guard them?
549
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:11,400
Er, because, witches,
550
00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:14,160
you don't know if the power's
kind of still in them... Oh!
551
00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:15,400
..even after they're dead.
552
00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:19,160
I don't want any kids
sort of playing, skipping around,
553
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:23,400
and there's still, like,
still some sort of evil seeping out.
554
00:24:25,160 --> 00:24:27,120
I'm Richard, by the way.
I am Thomasine.
555
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:28,400
Lovely to meet you.
556
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:30,080
Oh! You always curtsy?
557
00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:31,840
Only to people that I fancy.
558
00:24:35,040 --> 00:24:37,920
Could you do me a favour
and pass me that shovel? Um... No.
559
00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:40,480
Pick it up
so I can look at your bum.
560
00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:42,800
Phew! Wasn't expecting...
561
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:44,440
I wasn't expecting that!
562
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:46,920
I think I'll...
I'm going to get it, actually.
563
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:48,400
Cor.
564
00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:49,720
See you later.
565
00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,080
SHE EXHALES
566
00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:04,960
Come along, everybody, gather.
567
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,240
It's customary to say a few words,
568
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:09,640
be it a prayer
or a favourite passage.
569
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:13,160
A prayer, verse or a phrase,
then we can set her ablaze!
570
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:14,400
LAUGHTER
571
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:15,520
Thanks.
572
00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:17,840
Bit of phlegm in my throat.
573
00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:19,240
Um...
574
00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:26,800
In these moments, I'm reminded
of a passage from the Old Testament.
575
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:29,520
"An eye for an eye
and a tooth for a tooth,"
576
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:33,120
and I think what the Lord
is driving at there
577
00:25:33,160 --> 00:25:37,040
is he's inviting us
to extrapolate that out,
578
00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:39,480
away from just eyes and teeth
579
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,560
and towards all parts of us.
580
00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:48,560
So, for example, a thigh for a thigh
or a lung for a lung,
581
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:50,600
or a... Well, anyone...?
582
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:53,320
Lip. Lip would do it, yep.
Lip for a lip.
583
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:55,600
Yeah. A womb? Womb for a womb.
584
00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:57,320
Yes, one for the ladies.
585
00:25:57,360 --> 00:25:58,960
But does God...? A chin.
586
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,240
Chin is excellent.
587
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:02,600
That's world-class.
Yes, chin for a chin works a treat.
588
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:06,520
But does God literally want us
to do harm to another
589
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:10,600
just because we have had harm done
unto us?
590
00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:11,640
ALL: Yes.
591
00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:12,760
Going for yes? Yes.
592
00:26:12,800 --> 00:26:14,320
Unanimously? Yes.
593
00:26:14,360 --> 00:26:15,760
OK.
594
00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:17,480
So, then... Er... Yeah.
595
00:26:17,520 --> 00:26:19,000
Will this go on much longer?
596
00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:22,480
Er, no, no, no. I'll just do my bit,
then I'll get her lit.
597
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:24,560
One for you, Peter.
HE CHUCKLES
598
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:28,920
In these situations,
I always like to thank the Lord
599
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:31,840
with a rendition of
Are You Sleeping, Brother John?
600
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:33,760
What, the children's rhyme?
601
00:26:33,800 --> 00:26:36,080
Yes. Well, how does Brother John
pertain to Christ?
602
00:26:36,120 --> 00:26:37,920
John was the...
603
00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:41,520
..fourth wise man. Often overlooked.
604
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:43,920
I think only three of them,
in the end,
605
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:45,800
got the nod to visit
the Christ Child.
606
00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:49,280
John was sleeping, hence the song.
607
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,360
Um...
608
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:53,320
So, let's give that a whirl,
shall we?
609
00:26:53,360 --> 00:26:56,040
So, let's sing a round of
Are You Sleeping, Brother John?
610
00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:57,600
And let's start over here. So...
611
00:26:57,640 --> 00:26:59,120
# Are you sleeping...? #
612
00:26:59,160 --> 00:27:02,440
# Are you sleeping, Brother John? #
Just this quarter, for now.
613
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:04,160
And then at the back.
614
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:07,280
# Are you sleeping...? # Ready?
# Are you sleeping, Brother John? #
615
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:09,480
And then... # Are you sleeping...?
Are you sleeping? #
616
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:12,280
THEY SING ROUNDS
And nice and loud, belt it out.
617
00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:14,560
Chap in the felt hat.
# Are you sleeping...? #
618
00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:16,040
And then, eyes closed.
619
00:27:16,080 --> 00:27:17,800
Eyes...
620
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:19,160
Close your eyes.
621
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:22,360
SCRUNCHED closed
as if you're actually sleeping.
622
00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:24,200
Peter knows what I'm talking about.
623
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:26,080
Eyes closed, little fella.
624
00:27:26,120 --> 00:27:28,720
Even if I go quiet,
keep your eyes closed.
625
00:27:28,760 --> 00:27:30,360
Keep singing.
626
00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:32,240
# Morning bells are ringing... #
That's it.
627
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:33,840
# Morning bells are ringing
628
00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:36,480
# Ding-dang-dong, ding-dang-dong
Brother John, Brother John
629
00:27:36,520 --> 00:27:39,800
# Are you sleeping, are you sleeping
Morning bells are ringing
630
00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:42,480
# Brother John, Brother John?
Ding-dang-dong, ding-dang-dong
631
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:45,640
# Morning bells are ringing
Morning bells are dinging... #
632
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:47,800
Let's go.
There's dead women everywhere!
633
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:49,320
We should have stayed on the cart.
634
00:27:49,360 --> 00:27:51,640
There's a lynch mob.
They're maniacs. All of them.
635
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:53,120
I did tell you this before we came.
636
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:54,440
No, you jumped to a conclusion.
637
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:55,920
I arrived at a conclusion.
638
00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:57,920
It just happens to be
it was the same conclusion.
639
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:00,600
# Morning bells are ringing
Morning bells are dinging
640
00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:02,240
# Ding-dang-dong
641
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:05,120
# Morning bells are ringing
Morning bells are dinging
642
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:06,440
# Ding-dang-dong... #
643
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:11,280
We need to move
before anyone sees you.
644
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:13,080
You just don't want to lose
your chance
645
00:28:13,120 --> 00:28:14,680
to impress the Witchfinder General!
646
00:28:14,720 --> 00:28:16,160
I'm no good to you dead, am I?
647
00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:18,520
You stay here,
you'll be cinders in an hour.
648
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:19,600
Do you want that?
649
00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:22,160
Or do you want to take your chances
in Chelmsford? Chelmsford.
650
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:24,400
Going somewhere, Mr Bannister?
Do you know this woman?
651
00:28:24,440 --> 00:28:27,080
Well, not... Well, this is...
His wife. Ah.
652
00:28:35,120 --> 00:28:39,960
# They went into her father's hall
653
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:44,280
# Lay the bent to the bonnie broom
654
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:48,840
# To play the harp before them all
655
00:28:48,880 --> 00:28:52,960
# Fa-la-la-la la-la-la la la la
656
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:57,400
# But as they laid it on a stone
657
00:28:57,440 --> 00:29:01,480
# Lay the bent to the bonnie broom
658
00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:05,720
# The harp began to play alone... #
81244
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