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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:00,868 --> 00:01:05,240 Capturing Mary 2 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:16,390 MAN: I've been working for most of the year in this big house in London. 3 00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:18,072 I'm on the door. 4 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,835 It belongs to Elliot Graham, 5 00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:26,233 who, in the list of the richest people in Britain, was number eight. 6 00:01:26,320 --> 00:01:27,833 Nobody lives here now. 7 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:31,708 Mr Graham himself lives across the street, in number 3 1. 8 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:37,478 All that happens in this house is that it's cleaned, every day, 9 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:40,276 and people arrange flowers here. 10 00:01:41,680 --> 00:01:43,955 There is always fresh flowers. 11 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:49,911 And then, when the cleaners all leave, I'm alone here. 12 00:02:01,720 --> 00:02:04,951 From between six and nine, I am by myself. 13 00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:09,193 Well, until the security guard turns up. 14 00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:13,354 I have this whole place to myself. Every day. 15 00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:18,394 I'm not allowed to let anybody in, 16 00:02:18,480 --> 00:02:22,189 not permitted to open the front door to any stranger. 17 00:02:22,280 --> 00:02:24,510 I never break this rule, ever. 18 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:29,632 Not without Mr Graham's personal permission. 19 00:02:31,960 --> 00:02:34,155 But yesterday I did break it. 20 00:02:35,320 --> 00:02:37,595 The house shouldn't have been empty then. 21 00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:41,719 It was only ten to three, but the cleaners had left early. 22 00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:46,393 I really don't know why I broke the rule. 23 00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:49,949 It was just something about her. 24 00:02:52,640 --> 00:02:53,755 Yeah? 25 00:02:54,120 --> 00:02:55,792 Is Mrs Hopkins in? 26 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:59,310 She don't work here any more. 27 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:02,998 Right. I see. 28 00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:07,156 I spoke to her on the phone a little while ago, 29 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:10,676 and she was kind enough to say if I was passing and would like to look inside, 30 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:14,116 I should just ring the bell. And today I was passing. 31 00:03:14,960 --> 00:03:17,793 No, she stopped working here two weeks ago. 32 00:03:17,880 --> 00:03:19,359 I'll go, then. 33 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:27,073 - I can let you in, though. -Can you? 34 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:30,110 Please, come in. 35 00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:32,953 Thank you. 36 00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:41,753 Thank you. 37 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:48,995 (EXCLAIMS) 38 00:03:49,080 --> 00:03:50,399 That door! 39 00:03:50,840 --> 00:03:53,479 It's extraordinary, isn't it? 40 00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:56,120 Yeah. It is strange. 41 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,670 You get used to it, though. 42 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:10,958 Was there something you wanted to see especially? 43 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:13,315 -I mean, apart from the door? -No. 44 00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:16,396 No, nothing, nothing I need to see. 45 00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:18,948 No, I was just passing, as I said, I thought it would be 46 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:22,077 fascinating to see inside after all this time. 47 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:24,151 I used to come here when I was young. 48 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:27,198 -Okay. -Almost as young as you. 49 00:04:27,280 --> 00:04:28,429 Right. 50 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,990 Well, I've got all the keys here, 51 00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:33,833 so if you change your mind, I can show you whatever you want. 52 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:34,989 Yeah, there's lots to see. 53 00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:38,231 No, no, gosh, that won't be necessary. I don't want to cause any bother. 54 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,469 It's no bother. 55 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:42,472 And I have another appointment. Honestly, I can't be here long. 56 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:43,595 It won't take long. 57 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:46,672 No, I don't want to see the rest of the house. 58 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:54,471 I... I didn't come prepared for a guided tour, 59 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,838 you know, that's what I mean. 60 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:00,354 It's beautifully kept, I must say. 61 00:05:02,360 --> 00:05:04,828 Hmm, fresh flowers and everything. 62 00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:13,796 My name's Mary, Mary Gilbert. 63 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:16,195 -I'm Joe. -Hello, Joe. 64 00:05:17,520 --> 00:05:18,669 Joe Dix. 65 00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:21,278 Hello, Joe Dix. 66 00:05:22,680 --> 00:05:24,671 Shall I get you some tea? 67 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,879 I can do it quickly, very quickly, so you don't miss your appointment. 68 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:31,475 Yes, yes, that would be very kind. Thank you. 69 00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:02,389 It's beautiful tea, Joe. Thank you so much. 70 00:06:02,640 --> 00:06:05,996 -And these are delicious. -Good. 71 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:10,436 I'll just drink this, then I'll be gone. I have to get to my appointment. 72 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:13,751 Well, I'll be over here. Don't worry about me. 73 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:18,238 I've just got to fill in a few things in this ledger, 74 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:20,828 all the hours I've done this week. 75 00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:32,198 (UPBEAT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON HEADPHONES) 76 00:06:36,960 --> 00:06:39,030 (PING-PONG BALL BOUNCING) 77 00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,752 (MEN MUTTERING) 78 00:06:55,840 --> 00:06:57,671 (WOMAN SINGING OPERA) 79 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:14,793 (DOOR BANGING) 80 00:07:18,160 --> 00:07:19,275 JOE: Miss! 81 00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:21,549 Miss! 82 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:26,717 -Oh, I'm so sorry. How clumsy of me. -It's okay. 83 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:28,677 -Oh, my... -Wait there. 84 00:07:28,760 --> 00:07:29,988 Oh, I... 85 00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:36,079 I'm not sure I should have let this one in. 86 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:38,878 -Here. -I'm so sorry. 87 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:40,518 It's all right. 88 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:42,874 This will do it. 89 00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:45,349 -Look, please, let me. -No, no, no. 90 00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:54,119 You kindly ask me in here and I spill things all over the beautiful floor. 91 00:07:54,200 --> 00:07:56,919 Don't worry. It's only milk. 92 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:09,592 What happened here? 93 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,272 What do you mean? 94 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:14,316 Well, something happened to you here, didn't it? 95 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,789 I mean, before, when you were young? 96 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:19,394 -Is that what you think, Joe? -Yeah. 97 00:08:21,120 --> 00:08:22,838 Just because I didn't want to see the rest of the house 98 00:08:22,920 --> 00:08:25,514 doesn't mean something happened here. 99 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,470 -Why did you used to come here? -I came as a guest. 100 00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:37,193 -What, to big parties? -No. Quite small parties. 101 00:08:37,880 --> 00:08:42,351 -Oh, small parties? -Hmm. They were very select. 102 00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:46,310 (WOMEN SINGING OPERA) 103 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:51,269 MARY: It was amazing, this house, then. I'd never seen anything like it. 104 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:53,757 Mr Graham's father 105 00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,991 invited people here he considered important. 106 00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:00,878 Once a week he had a little soiree, 107 00:09:00,960 --> 00:09:02,552 so when you came here, 108 00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:06,269 there were few guests, but nearly all of them were giants. 109 00:09:06,360 --> 00:09:07,952 Great novelists, 110 00:09:08,600 --> 00:09:10,830 famous people from the movies, 111 00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:14,716 actors and directors, scientists... 112 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:16,552 Politicians, of course, too. 113 00:09:17,800 --> 00:09:20,394 Those were the only guests. 114 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:24,758 I mean, you'd crane your neck all night to try to get a glimpse. 115 00:09:25,160 --> 00:09:29,597 Was that... Was that E.M. Forster that just walked past you? 116 00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:35,599 Is that figure over there in the chair Alfred Hitchcock? 117 00:09:35,680 --> 00:09:38,353 Is that the back of Evelyn Waugh's head? 118 00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:43,117 I think that's Ava Gardner over there, 119 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:44,952 deep in the shadows. 120 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:51,559 -Why were you there? -How on earth was I invited? 121 00:09:51,640 --> 00:09:53,312 (CHUCKLES) 122 00:09:53,720 --> 00:09:55,278 Me? 123 00:09:55,360 --> 00:09:58,670 A young woman who'd just lost her Manchester accent. 124 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,190 You wouldn't have guessed that's where I came from, would you? 125 00:10:02,280 --> 00:10:03,759 I hadn't thought about it. 126 00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:07,355 I forced myself to lose my accent, at university. 127 00:10:08,360 --> 00:10:10,828 I taught myself to speak like this. 128 00:10:16,360 --> 00:10:18,351 I was there because I'd been very lucky 129 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:21,716 and become rather well-known in my own right. 130 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:25,031 See, at Oxford, I wrote a lot of journalism, 131 00:10:25,120 --> 00:10:28,715 and one of my pieces got picked up by a Sunday newspaper. 132 00:10:32,360 --> 00:10:35,557 Suddenly I was writing about movies and culture. 133 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:53,670 You really can't imagine what the world was like then. 134 00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:58,038 It was a very class-bound time, of course, 135 00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:01,317 full of absurd rules and ridiculous prejudices. 136 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:04,597 Even about how you held your fork at meal times. 137 00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:06,238 It was at Henley. 138 00:11:06,320 --> 00:11:09,118 -No, I... -I'm sure, at the shoot. 139 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:11,077 I've never been to a shoot. 140 00:11:11,160 --> 00:11:14,675 Well, suddenly, I had my own column 141 00:11:16,200 --> 00:11:20,830 and I wrote a book with a... It's a silly title, 142 00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:24,633 Slicing The Apple, which caused a stir. 143 00:11:25,520 --> 00:11:29,115 It was an attack against the male elite. 144 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:31,111 It was nothing remarkable, of course,Joe. 145 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:34,397 It was who was saying it that excited people. 146 00:11:36,560 --> 00:11:39,791 I mean, this was before the Beatles and all that, of course. 147 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:42,235 Yeah? Oh, before the Beatles. 148 00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:46,151 The confidence of youth. 149 00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:56,549 YOUNG MARY: A month ago, regular readers of this column 150 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,518 will remember I advocated a little more passion 151 00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:01,318 in our native cinema, 152 00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:03,960 that perhaps physical love was not best expressed 153 00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:06,349 by a small on our jaunty hero's cheek 154 00:12:06,440 --> 00:12:08,032 by his long-suffering wife, 155 00:12:08,120 --> 00:12:11,112 as he sets off for work in the morning whistling. 156 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:13,509 I also ventured the thought that it was important 157 00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:16,512 that audiences were treated as adults, and therefore 158 00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:20,070 sexual love was clearly a proper subject for cinema. 159 00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:23,675 And that, ultimately, we might see some representation 160 00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:27,309 of the actual sexual act in mainstream pictures. 161 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:32,877 I wrote an article saying there should be more sex 162 00:12:32,960 --> 00:12:37,351 in the movies. I mean, all hell broke loose. 163 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:40,269 There I was. 164 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:45,070 I kept being invited, and I felt really alive, 165 00:12:46,440 --> 00:12:50,672 buzzing with ideas and the possibility of things. 166 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:58,319 JOE: Miss? 167 00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:03,717 Was it in here? 168 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:06,314 In one of these rooms, the singing? 169 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:09,838 Partly in there. 170 00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:15,710 -Come and have a look at it now. -Oh, no. No, I don't need to do that. 171 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:17,749 Come on. 172 00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:30,114 Someone die in here or something? 173 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,192 It looks smaller. 174 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:37,670 (SINGING OPERA) 175 00:13:44,080 --> 00:13:45,911 The funny thing is, 176 00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:50,995 the person I found most interesting wasn't one of the living legends. 177 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:52,229 I found myself 178 00:13:52,320 --> 00:13:56,279 becoming really fascinated by this man who wasn't at all famous. 179 00:13:57,640 --> 00:14:01,110 In fact, nobody there was quite sure what he did. 180 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:07,270 I noticed people seemed a little nervous when he approached, 181 00:14:07,360 --> 00:14:08,998 even Alfred Hitchcock. 182 00:14:11,560 --> 00:14:13,710 And then I began to understand why, 183 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:16,872 when I managed to eavesdrop on what he was saying. 184 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:21,829 He would whisper to these great writers and movie directors and actors, 185 00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:26,276 ''Your latest 186 00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:30,319 ''doesn't seem to have caused quite such a stir as your last. 187 00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:33,436 ''It's still on, isn't it? 188 00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:41,237 ''Well, I don't know, I liked it. I don't know why I'm so alone.'' 189 00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:42,993 You must be so relieved. 190 00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:44,911 People seem to be going despite the notices. 191 00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:47,629 He seemed to weave a web 192 00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,514 round these famous people. 193 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:56,473 I think people are just a little confused, that's what I think. 194 00:14:56,960 --> 00:15:01,112 But it won't have done you any harm, will it? 195 00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:03,031 People said he was in publishing. 196 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:07,836 That as a very young man he'd worked for Lloyd George on his papers, 197 00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:09,638 getting them in order. 198 00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:12,837 Now he was doing the same for Winston Churchill. 199 00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:19,394 He was very friendly with the great newspaper proprietors of the time. 200 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:23,029 So he knew everyone who mattered. 201 00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:25,435 He was one of those mysterious people 202 00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:29,832 who seem to do both everything and nothing. 203 00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:36,435 (PING-PONG BALL BOUNCING) 204 00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,193 Sometimes, 205 00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:45,558 I would see him thrash this ball about in the passage. 206 00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:54,917 People said he knew so many secrets, 207 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:59,870 but he never ever disclosed what he knew. 208 00:16:14,160 --> 00:16:16,833 The other extraordinary thing he did, 209 00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:20,230 he brought these extremely young girls with him. 210 00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:23,392 Gorgeous young things, but definitely underage. 211 00:16:23,480 --> 00:16:25,277 On my fourth visit, 212 00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:28,397 there was this particularly glorious creature. 213 00:16:30,000 --> 00:16:35,950 I don't know how he introduced her. His niece? Friend of the family? 214 00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:47,476 I'd never spoken to him. 215 00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:49,188 Not yet. 216 00:16:50,160 --> 00:16:53,948 Occasionally, I would see him glance towards me 217 00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:56,110 in a slightly knowing way. 218 00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:05,236 And on this evening, he was getting closer and closer. 219 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,234 Phyllis, how are you? 220 00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:14,510 MARY: I felt myself getting excited. 221 00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:19,112 More excited, �, 222 00:17:19,200 --> 00:17:22,397 than if Alfred Hitchcock had been coming to talk to me. 223 00:17:22,480 --> 00:17:24,118 What did he say? 224 00:17:25,800 --> 00:17:27,631 -Oh, sorry. -Sorry. 225 00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:32,076 MARY: I'd just gone into the kitchen to get a glass of water. 226 00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:35,118 It seemed absurd to ask a servant to do that. 227 00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:57,311 -I'm not disturbing you, am I? -No, no, of course, not. 228 00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:01,078 Both of us have escaped to the kitchen. 229 00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:03,833 No, I just came to get myself some water. 230 00:18:03,920 --> 00:18:05,751 Right. 231 00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:08,638 Well, as for me, I'm really going to shock you, I think. 232 00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:13,271 -Oh, are you? I doubt that. -I've come here to make myself a salad. 233 00:18:13,360 --> 00:18:14,349 (LAUGHING) 234 00:18:14,440 --> 00:18:15,919 I have. 235 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:18,468 One of my little foibles when it gets late. 236 00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:23,475 The staff leave me the ingredients and I make myself a salad. 237 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,915 -Does that shock you? -No, of course not. 238 00:18:26,000 --> 00:18:28,434 It is a little eccentric, I admit. 239 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:32,115 -I haven't introduced myself, I'm... -It is me who has to introduce himself. 240 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:33,474 I'm Greville White. 241 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,552 I know, of course, who you are, Mary Gilbert, because you are famous. 242 00:18:36,640 --> 00:18:40,633 -Oh, no, hardly. -Absolutely. You are. 243 00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:44,156 I hang on your every word. I can quote whole paragraphs. 244 00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:46,310 You're an ''acid observer'', isn't that right? 245 00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:49,756 Slicing people down to size? I do a bit of that, too, I suppose, 246 00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:52,274 though, of course, I don't write it down. 247 00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:55,432 -But I know a few things. -I bet you do. 248 00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:57,238 ''The Voice of Youth'', isn't that what it says? 249 00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:58,355 Oh, please... 250 00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:00,795 Your by-line in the newspaper, ''The True Voice of Youth''? 251 00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:03,792 That was awful. I stopped them doing it. 252 00:19:03,880 --> 00:19:06,952 What a fantastic opportunity that is, though, 253 00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,235 to be the voice of youth. 254 00:19:09,320 --> 00:19:12,551 -I would grab it if I were you. -I'm trying to. 255 00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:20,513 You know, one thing I often do... Well, ''often'' is a lie, 256 00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:25,355 one thing I occasionally do is see myself as others see me. 257 00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:28,751 Quite vividly, in fact. 258 00:19:28,840 --> 00:19:30,990 -Do you ever do that? -No. 259 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:35,234 You sure? 260 00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,914 I'm not certain I know what you mean. 261 00:19:39,120 --> 00:19:41,395 I'll tell you exactly what I mean. 262 00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,596 When I think about myself, 263 00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:47,675 most of the time I see myself as dapper. 264 00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:52,678 And maybe I've got a little more energy than some other people. 265 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:54,591 You have that, too, Mary. 266 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:57,672 And I've got a good memory and a reasonably lively mind, 267 00:19:57,760 --> 00:20:00,399 that's how I see myself. 268 00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:02,759 But sometimes 269 00:20:02,840 --> 00:20:06,628 I conjure up the picture other people have of me, 270 00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,199 what they see. 271 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:16,075 They see me as quite a slimy, maybe treacherous fellow, sweaty, 272 00:20:17,280 --> 00:20:20,590 always with little beads of sweat on his brow, 273 00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:23,274 as if I'm working too hard to be charming, 274 00:20:23,360 --> 00:20:27,114 covering what's really going on inside and the effort shows. 275 00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:33,951 Whatever the temperature of the room, whatever the season, 276 00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:37,712 they see the sweat. 277 00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:49,510 Don't worry, a little party trick. 278 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,672 Hopefully not too many people see me like that. 279 00:20:52,760 --> 00:20:54,990 -I'm sure they don't. -Come on. 280 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,711 No need to be bland with me, Mary Gilbert, 281 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,870 that's not what you're famous for. 282 00:20:59,960 --> 00:21:02,030 I'm quite certain you, for a start, have viewed me like that. 283 00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:04,714 -No, I'm sure I haven't. -Don't worry. 284 00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:07,314 I'm not offended in the slightest. 285 00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:12,199 -I can tell you, Mr White, I... -Please, Greville. 286 00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:17,432 Please, Bernard. 287 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:36,873 I promise you, I really promise you, I'm not offended. 288 00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:41,030 And what's more, I'm going to prove it to you. 289 00:21:41,120 --> 00:21:43,190 Now. 290 00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:47,512 -Prove it to me? -By doing something I never normally do. 291 00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,910 Telling you a few little things that might amuse you, 292 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:55,037 since you are an observer yourself. 293 00:21:55,120 --> 00:21:56,917 I never gossip as a rule... 294 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,468 -I'd heard. -Oh, 295 00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:02,711 so you do know something about me. 296 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:07,794 -I'd heard that. -Yes, well, I never ever gossip. 297 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:12,549 I mean, too many useful things would be compromised if I did. 298 00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:15,518 But for you, young Mary Gilbert, 299 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:18,909 I will make an exception. 300 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:21,318 My only exception. 301 00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:25,038 He told me a few little titbits. 302 00:22:25,120 --> 00:22:28,635 A famous politician who was having an affair with a minor royal 303 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:31,393 was probably the only juicy revelation. 304 00:22:32,120 --> 00:22:34,953 Yet they were mostly mild, harmless stories, 305 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,600 like a civil servant who had an obsessive need 306 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:38,829 to pick people's pockets. 307 00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:43,676 Not just watches and wallets, but sometimes people's cough lozenges. 308 00:22:44,120 --> 00:22:46,076 (CHUCKLING) There was a funny story 309 00:22:47,360 --> 00:22:49,828 about a famous Hollywood star 310 00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:53,674 who'd come over to England to make a film and she was terrified 311 00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:57,594 of Pekingese dogs, regarded seeing them as a terrible omen. 312 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:01,598 So if she caught sight of one on her way to the film studios 313 00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:04,797 in the morning, she would refuse to film that day. 314 00:23:05,320 --> 00:23:10,314 So the film company was reduced to hiring special dog walkers, 315 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:16,028 all with great big dogs, to amble through the streets 316 00:23:16,120 --> 00:23:19,271 near her hotel each time she set off in the morning. 317 00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,233 I met her once. 318 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:25,279 Apart from the business with dogs, she was rather nice. 319 00:23:25,360 --> 00:23:29,399 She swore an awful lot. She had a charming Southern accent. 320 00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:34,431 It was fascinating, being deluged with gossip 321 00:23:34,520 --> 00:23:36,795 while he made his healthy-looking salad. 322 00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:40,750 He was funny and charming. 323 00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:43,354 But I had no doubt, as I watched him, 324 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:48,150 I was under no illusion that, though I was quite well-known then 325 00:23:48,240 --> 00:23:52,836 and nobody outside the elite circle knew who he was, 326 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:56,515 here was someone who was far more powerful than me. 327 00:23:56,600 --> 00:23:57,999 He does a jolly good haircut. 328 00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:00,116 MARY: Someone I had to be extremely careful of. 329 00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,236 I've had mine done by him more than once. 330 00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:06,552 -Oh, does he charge as well? -No, quite the opposite. 331 00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:09,834 You get a glass of sherry and some cheese biscuits. 332 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,629 Why is he telling me all this? 333 00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:15,949 He's more than just trying to get me into bed. 334 00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:18,596 What's he really after? 335 00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:26,111 -Where are you going? -I'm going to see where it happened. 336 00:24:26,200 --> 00:24:28,475 -Are you coming? -Do we have to? 337 00:24:34,280 --> 00:24:38,796 -Well, what do you think? -It looks terrific. 338 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:48,792 It's hardly changed. Well, that's terrible. 339 00:24:48,880 --> 00:24:51,713 It's like it's been preserved. 340 00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:54,633 -It should have changed more. -Yeah. 341 00:25:01,120 --> 00:25:03,350 Did you get to eat his salad? 342 00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:10,035 It's funny you should ask that, I was just thinking that very second, 343 00:25:10,120 --> 00:25:11,997 I never got to taste it. 344 00:25:12,720 --> 00:25:15,473 It is beautiful, isn't it? You're right. 345 00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:20,393 -Yes. -Thank you. And it is just for us two. 346 00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:24,433 Just for us? 347 00:25:24,520 --> 00:25:26,158 We'll never finish it. 348 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:29,915 Shall we go and choose some wine to go with it? 349 00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:32,719 -Oh, oh, you mean... -From the cellar. 350 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:36,110 -The cellar? -Yes, I often do that. 351 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,919 Mr Graham has a fantastic wine cellar, 352 00:25:39,000 --> 00:25:41,116 though I'm not sure he knows his way round it. 353 00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:43,509 He frequently asks me for recommendations, 354 00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:47,912 and he lets me take a bottle home, when I wish. One of my little perks. 355 00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:51,513 Do you want to come and help me choose? 356 00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:56,913 Ever written about wine? 357 00:25:57,000 --> 00:26:00,117 No. I know absolutely nothing about wine. 358 00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:02,236 So, there are some things you don't have an opinion on, then? 359 00:26:02,320 --> 00:26:03,753 Of course. 360 00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:07,230 There are all sorts of things I don't know anything about, naturally. 361 00:26:07,320 --> 00:26:09,993 Really? I can't believe that's true, Mary. 362 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:12,469 Well, it is. 363 00:26:12,560 --> 00:26:15,597 I see myself very much as a beginner still. 364 00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:17,477 I've been very lucky in my career. 365 00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:20,916 It's good to have strong opinions. I approve of that. 366 00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:25,878 MARY: I realised he was most probably trying to seduce me, 367 00:26:25,960 --> 00:26:29,475 but, I don't know why, I wasn't the least afraid of him. 368 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,993 I knew he wasn't going to try to rape me. 369 00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:35,559 And I knew 370 00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:40,236 instinctively there was something else he wanted to tell me. 371 00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:44,791 And, of course, a bit of me was thinking maybe there's a story here. 372 00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,358 Up until 20 years ago, 373 00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,954 the food used to come along here from the kitchens. 374 00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:01,837 Can you believe that? 375 00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:09,597 I know it seems spooky down here, but it isn't. 376 00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:14,630 -It is, in fact, rather beautiful. -Beautiful? 377 00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:18,914 Maybe. In a way. 378 00:27:24,200 --> 00:27:26,794 Isn't this magnificent? 379 00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:29,110 Yes, it is. 380 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:32,590 Some of these bottles are over a hundred years old. 381 00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:35,069 Mr Graham bought up other people's wine collections 382 00:27:35,160 --> 00:27:37,230 and stuck them down here. 383 00:27:37,320 --> 00:27:40,437 There are some real treasures that are worth a fortune. 384 00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:43,034 I persuaded him recently to do some better labelling. 385 00:27:43,120 --> 00:27:45,873 I wrote some of these myself. 386 00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:48,428 -Great labels. -Thanks. 387 00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:51,080 Yes, they are rather nice. 388 00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:53,435 -You know about films? -Yes. 389 00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:56,478 Well, this is a bit like something in that fat chap upstairs' movie, 390 00:27:56,560 --> 00:27:59,313 you know, Notorious, where they go down to the wine cellar. 391 00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:01,994 Cary Grant, you don't know what he's going to discover, 392 00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:03,229 and then Ingrid Bergman joins him. 393 00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,595 Well, I'm not sure we're going to find some uranium 394 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:08,478 down here in one of these bottles. 395 00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:13,269 -And that's what Cary Grant found. -No. Maybe not. 396 00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:18,758 And here we have this. We have a Chateau Latour 1 900, 397 00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:21,556 one of the greatest wines of the century. 398 00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,756 And little did they know, as they were drinking this 399 00:28:23,840 --> 00:28:26,877 what a great disaster was going to overcome them all, 400 00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:30,077 the fighting, the trenches, in just a few years. 401 00:28:31,400 --> 00:28:33,277 I like doing this, 402 00:28:33,360 --> 00:28:37,672 imaging what was happening as certain wines were bottled. 403 00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:41,389 A Chateau Haut Brion, often described as a very feminine wine. 404 00:28:41,480 --> 00:28:43,755 I mean, 1 929 was a truly great year. 405 00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:46,559 Just as the stock markets of the world were collapsing 406 00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:50,235 and people were throwing themselves out of buildings. 407 00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:52,914 Exactly. And come here. 408 00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:56,597 1 94 3, the best vintage during the war. 409 00:28:56,680 --> 00:29:00,992 I mean, the connoisseur's life very definitely didn't stop, you see. 410 00:29:01,080 --> 00:29:03,594 You do know a lot about wine. 411 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:07,392 Well, I spend an awful lot of my time in country houses 412 00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:09,675 drinking the stuff, as I help them out. 413 00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:17,919 Well, I wouldn't complain if I were you, it's a nice way to spend your time. 414 00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:19,672 Was I complaining? 415 00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:22,158 I didn't mean to. 416 00:29:32,040 --> 00:29:33,473 There's more. 417 00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:56,309 Shall we, uh... Shall we choose a bottle, then? 418 00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:59,870 Maybe the one that's worth a fortune, that would surprise them. 419 00:29:59,960 --> 00:30:03,555 If we went upstairs waving that around, having opened it. 420 00:30:04,840 --> 00:30:06,319 I lied to you. 421 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:08,833 About what? 422 00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:13,230 -The reason for us coming down here? -No. 423 00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:16,118 What do you take me for, Mary? 424 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:20,955 I don't normally lure young women down into cellars to take advantage of them. 425 00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:23,031 No, I lied about the stories I told you. 426 00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:24,758 You mean they weren't true? 427 00:30:24,840 --> 00:30:27,673 No, they were true all right, but they were 428 00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:31,078 silly, unimportant froth. 429 00:30:33,360 --> 00:30:35,920 They weren't the real story, Mary. 430 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,434 I should have been more truthful. 431 00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:43,273 Do you want to hear the real story, Mary? 432 00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:56,189 As he said that, I could feel myself go cold. 433 00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:16,359 Do you want to hear that? The real story, Mary? 434 00:31:20,240 --> 00:31:21,389 Yes. 435 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:24,549 Right. 436 00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:30,594 And then he tells me a series 437 00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,630 of what I can only call 438 00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:36,192 horrific things. 439 00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:41,428 He was very calm, very specific, 440 00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:45,868 the year, the exact location 441 00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:50,396 and, of course, all the real names. 442 00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:54,238 At first I thought I could handle it. 443 00:31:55,560 --> 00:32:01,317 It started with something fairly nasty, but it was not unbearable. 444 00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:04,392 About an archbishop 445 00:32:04,520 --> 00:32:09,958 who thrashed little boys till they bled and were raw. 446 00:32:10,040 --> 00:32:13,157 Continued even when he was a famous prelate. 447 00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:15,676 He thrashed and thrashed them. 448 00:32:21,840 --> 00:32:26,516 And then he moved on to a famous public figure 449 00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:30,513 who had apparently kept a young woman like a slave in his house. 450 00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:34,629 Degraded her in the most horrible fashion, for year after year. 451 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:39,473 When it was over, her own sister didn't recognise her. 452 00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:44,278 There was a story that particularly shocked me, 453 00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:51,432 one he himself had directly witnessed about a very senior politician, 454 00:32:52,320 --> 00:32:55,995 somebody who had helped lead us through the war, 455 00:32:56,080 --> 00:32:58,514 watching a documentary 456 00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:01,910 about the Holocaust and coming out afterwards and saying to Greville... 457 00:33:02,440 --> 00:33:06,752 ''The fucking Jews, they were really asking for it.'' 458 00:33:08,560 --> 00:33:10,949 That's what he said to me, Mary. 459 00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:14,430 -That's... That's terrible. -Yes. 460 00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:19,398 He seemed very surprised when I went rather quiet after he'd said it. 461 00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:23,634 MARY: There were stories of cruelty to children. 462 00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:26,957 There were one or two things 463 00:33:27,040 --> 00:33:31,670 so disgusting I've never been able to get them out of my head. 464 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:35,594 I find myself thinking about them nearly every week, even now. 465 00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:40,672 Everything he told me was sordid, 466 00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:45,878 and sometimes unbearably sad, too. 467 00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:51,154 And I believed every word. 468 00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:55,994 I don't think he was making it up. 469 00:33:57,080 --> 00:33:59,753 In fact, I know he wasn't making it up. 470 00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:03,510 I mean, I know 471 00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:06,797 there are stories you can tell about the powerful in any age, 472 00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:10,919 I'm sure you could collect awful things now, 473 00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:16,518 but hearing them pour out, all together, coming right at me. 474 00:34:19,720 --> 00:34:22,029 It took me totally by surprise. 475 00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:25,869 I liked to think of myself 476 00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:31,672 as being very sophisticated, unshockable. 477 00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:35,389 But he really shocked me. 478 00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:47,278 Nice life I lead. 479 00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:54,309 There is a line of cruelty, Mary, that I've watched personally, 480 00:34:55,960 --> 00:35:00,431 running from before the war right through to where we are now. 481 00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:04,399 I think I'm a great witness, the many things I've seen. 482 00:35:07,400 --> 00:35:09,834 It's just I can never tell people. 483 00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,710 -Well, why are you telling me? -I don't know. 484 00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:19,113 I really don't know the answer to that, Mary. 485 00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:21,919 Maybe you seemed a good person to tell. 486 00:35:22,840 --> 00:35:24,558 The voice of youth. 487 00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:27,874 And also perhaps I wanted to tell you because... 488 00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:32,794 -I wanted to show you something. -Show me what? 489 00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:36,395 Show you that even though I know all these things, 490 00:35:36,480 --> 00:35:37,515 and in one or two instances 491 00:35:37,600 --> 00:35:40,876 have actually been in the house when they happened, 492 00:35:40,960 --> 00:35:44,396 I still believe the alternative is worse. 493 00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:46,152 What's the alternative? 494 00:35:46,240 --> 00:35:50,279 Reducing everybody and everything to the same level. 495 00:35:50,360 --> 00:35:53,989 Letting the great unwashed run everything. 496 00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:58,471 And suddenly, he's all bright and argumentative. 497 00:35:59,480 --> 00:36:01,596 Do you agree with me, Mary? 498 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:07,835 As if after telling me all these disgusting things 499 00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:09,717 none of it mattered, 500 00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:12,109 as if all he wanted was a little 501 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:16,557 dinner party political ding dong, to take me on. 502 00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:18,596 What's your view, Mary? 503 00:36:24,440 --> 00:36:28,433 You're going to run away now, aren't you? 504 00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:32,433 -I think I'd better leave, don't you? -No, I don't think you should leave. 505 00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:34,431 Well, I'm going to. 506 00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:41,669 We haven't chosen our bottle yet. 507 00:36:44,280 --> 00:36:46,077 No, we haven't. 508 00:36:52,160 --> 00:36:55,914 No, of course, everything you've told me... 509 00:36:56,000 --> 00:36:59,549 -Yes? -Will remain completely confidential. 510 00:36:59,840 --> 00:37:03,753 -Naturally. -I won't breathe a word. 511 00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:08,152 -Do I really believe that? -Yes. You do believe that. 512 00:37:10,680 --> 00:37:14,719 -If that is what you promise, Mary. -That's what I promise. 513 00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:44,910 Oh, it still looks creepy, even with all this light on. 514 00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,760 I suppose most basements are creepy. 515 00:37:53,240 --> 00:37:55,800 Yeah, I've never seen a rat down here, so it must be clean. 516 00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:57,199 Oh, don't! 517 00:37:58,440 --> 00:38:00,317 I suppose so little goes on in the house now, 518 00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:02,789 there's not much for them to eat. 519 00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:15,110 All the wine, it's still here. 520 00:38:21,960 --> 00:38:24,076 -Nobody drinks it? -No. 521 00:38:27,000 --> 00:38:28,319 You're thinking I should never have 522 00:38:28,400 --> 00:38:30,038 come down here with him, aren't you, Joe? 523 00:38:30,120 --> 00:38:32,190 I weren't thinking that. 524 00:38:32,680 --> 00:38:34,591 Would you have said no? 525 00:38:35,280 --> 00:38:37,077 No, I don't think so. 526 00:39:17,960 --> 00:39:20,599 (WOMEN SINGING OPERA) 527 00:39:39,640 --> 00:39:41,551 MARY: I told myself I would let everything go, 528 00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:43,198 you know, let it wash away, 529 00:39:43,280 --> 00:39:45,794 that by the time I got home it would be gone. 530 00:39:45,880 --> 00:39:48,235 Of course, within minutes of me sitting there, 531 00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:51,073 I realised that wasn't going to happen because, 532 00:39:51,160 --> 00:39:54,311 as soon as I was alone with my thoughts, 533 00:39:54,400 --> 00:39:57,358 everything he told me became even more vivid. 534 00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:02,479 For some reason, I started seeing this newsreel footage, 535 00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:05,711 and I was thinking all these things he's told me 536 00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:10,749 are running underneath, underneath these events. 537 00:40:32,640 --> 00:40:34,870 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 538 00:40:41,720 --> 00:40:43,199 May I have a cigarette? 539 00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:53,958 MARY: And then something else dawned on me. 540 00:40:54,040 --> 00:40:58,158 Because he'd been so specific, every date, 541 00:40:58,240 --> 00:41:01,869 every name, people that were still alive, 542 00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:05,077 when he came back into the room, I realised 543 00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:13,314 he's told me all these things which he might not have told anybody else, 544 00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:17,029 so he's not going to let go of me that easily. 545 00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:36,796 Just running away from him in the cellar isn't going to finish the business. 546 00:41:50,240 --> 00:41:52,310 Let's get out of here, Joe. 547 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:09,276 I need you to lead me, Joe, I don't know my way out of this bloody place. 548 00:42:09,360 --> 00:42:13,319 -Oh, well, it's this way. -Oh, thank you. 549 00:42:20,280 --> 00:42:23,158 Oh, that's better, Joe, thank you. 550 00:42:39,880 --> 00:42:42,553 I was just keeping out the winter cold. 551 00:42:45,800 --> 00:42:49,395 Did you get away from him? Away from this man? 552 00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,869 Well, that was my intention, Joe, 553 00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:57,995 and for that to be possible, I knew I needed to see him again. 554 00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:02,912 I would act so vague when I saw him, 555 00:43:03,600 --> 00:43:07,718 so forgetful, he'll realise he has no hold over me. 556 00:43:08,800 --> 00:43:13,635 I mean, I knew he could still do me professional harm, if he chose. 557 00:43:16,920 --> 00:43:18,956 It was the first time 558 00:43:19,640 --> 00:43:22,438 I'd been invited to spend the night here. 559 00:43:24,600 --> 00:43:26,830 We'd been to Wimbledon to see the tennis. 560 00:43:26,920 --> 00:43:29,195 In the morning, we were going down the river. 561 00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:31,919 As always, there was a small group of guests, 562 00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,036 they were all very famous, 563 00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:37,318 but no Greville White. 564 00:43:41,080 --> 00:43:45,756 Mr Graham's theme for the evening seemed to be Edwardian Music Hall. 565 00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:49,549 The house was ringing with these old songs. 566 00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:51,837 WOMAN: # Tick tock, it stopped 567 00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:53,148 # Short 568 00:43:53,240 --> 00:43:59,315 # Never to go again when the old man died 569 00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:05,514 # It rang an alarm In the dead of the night... # 570 00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:09,070 MARY: I was feeling very excited, I remember. 571 00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:12,709 I'd just been given an important assignment, 572 00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:15,109 a series of articles in America. 573 00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:18,554 It would be my first visit there. 574 00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:20,751 # Still the clock kept the time 575 00:44:20,840 --> 00:44:23,149 # With a soft and muffled chime 576 00:44:23,240 --> 00:44:27,677 # And we silently stood by his side 577 00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:30,559 # But it stopped, short 578 00:44:30,720 --> 00:44:36,716 # Never to go again when the old man died # 579 00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:44,393 Mr Graham, it's been a fantastic day, thank you. 580 00:44:44,480 --> 00:44:47,631 I'm heading to America soon. I'm going to do a few articles out there. 581 00:44:47,720 --> 00:44:49,790 -How wonderful. -Yes, a fantastic opportunity. 582 00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:52,189 I'm only going for a short time, but I'm very excited. 583 00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:53,759 -Good night. -Good night. 584 00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:55,910 # I have a song to sing, O! 585 00:44:56,000 --> 00:45:01,791 # What is your song, O? 586 00:45:03,320 --> 00:45:07,233 # It is sung with the ring of the songs maids sing # 587 00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:11,757 # Who loved with a love life-long-o 588 00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:15,628 # It's a song of a merry maid peerly proud 589 00:45:15,720 --> 00:45:19,395 # Who loved a lord and who laughed aloud 590 00:45:19,480 --> 00:45:23,359 # At the moan of the merry man moping mum 591 00:45:23,440 --> 00:45:27,513 # Whose soul was sad and whose glance was glum 592 00:45:27,600 --> 00:45:31,673 # Who sipped no sup and who craved no crumb 593 00:45:31,760 --> 00:45:36,276 # As he sighed for the love of a lady 594 00:45:36,360 --> 00:45:40,831 # Hey-di, hey-di 595 00:45:41,520 --> 00:45:44,990 # Misery me, lack-a-day-de 596 00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:50,029 # His pains were o'er and he sighed no more 597 00:45:50,120 --> 00:45:56,639 # For he lived in the love of a lady # 598 00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:06,836 (AUDIENCE APPLAUDING) 599 00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:14,431 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 600 00:46:14,520 --> 00:46:17,398 -Who is it? -It's me, Greville. 601 00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:21,314 I don't need to come in, I've just got something here for you. 602 00:46:30,880 --> 00:46:33,314 I thought you might like some strawberries. 603 00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,789 I missed the tennis, but I brought the strawberries. 604 00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:37,871 It's clotted cream, do you want some? 605 00:46:37,960 --> 00:46:41,191 Thank you, that's very kind. I'll have a spoonful. 606 00:46:45,320 --> 00:46:47,993 It's all right, I don't need to come in. 607 00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:53,873 -You look really well. -Thank you. I am. 608 00:46:54,560 --> 00:46:56,869 I just wanted to say, Mary, about the last time we saw each other... 609 00:46:56,960 --> 00:46:59,997 Oh, yes, when you made that big salad. 610 00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:02,316 Yes, there was the salad. 611 00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:05,509 And then there was what I told you. 612 00:47:05,600 --> 00:47:08,672 Oh, yes, was it something... Was it about a film star and dogs? 613 00:47:08,760 --> 00:47:12,435 Yes, that was part of it, amongst other things. 614 00:47:14,360 --> 00:47:16,032 I just want to explain why I told you those things... 615 00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:18,953 -No, no, you don't have to. -Please. 616 00:47:19,040 --> 00:47:22,589 I just wanted to say I really didn't mean to upset you. 617 00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:24,989 Was I upset? No. 618 00:47:25,080 --> 00:47:28,709 -No, I don't think so. -Right. That's good. 619 00:47:28,800 --> 00:47:30,597 I'm glad you weren't. 620 00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:34,837 # The boy I love 621 00:47:34,920 --> 00:47:38,993 # Is up in the gallery 622 00:47:39,200 --> 00:47:41,998 # The boy I love 623 00:47:42,120 --> 00:47:46,557 # Is looking at me 624 00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:49,552 # There he is, can't you see... # 625 00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:54,830 Sorry, eating these like this just reminded me of something. 626 00:47:54,920 --> 00:47:56,148 Since I didn't upset you last time, 627 00:47:56,240 --> 00:47:57,275 I'll risk one more, one more little image. 628 00:47:57,360 --> 00:48:00,830 -Please, it's late and I'm... -No, no, no, this is tiny. 629 00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:03,434 It's funny, not like the other ones. 630 00:48:03,520 --> 00:48:06,353 I was in a private room in a gentleman's club, 631 00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:08,351 the Beefsteak Club. 632 00:48:08,440 --> 00:48:11,910 A group of us were trying out, for reasons I don't remember, 633 00:48:12,000 --> 00:48:15,595 a series of ghastly over-sweet Greek puddings, 634 00:48:15,680 --> 00:48:19,309 with names like ''galaktoboureko'', and they were so sticky. 635 00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:21,317 It was like eating glue. 636 00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,152 There must be a new cook, mustn't there? 637 00:48:23,240 --> 00:48:25,435 We've had the same six puddings for the last 20 years. 638 00:48:25,520 --> 00:48:27,033 (ALL LAUGHING) 639 00:48:27,120 --> 00:48:29,236 And as we were trying to unstick ourselves, 640 00:48:29,320 --> 00:48:33,074 these men were saying, very senior figures in the government, 641 00:48:33,160 --> 00:48:34,513 ''You know how I hate niggers, 642 00:48:34,600 --> 00:48:37,672 ''but we are going to have to give them something, especially in Africa.'' 643 00:48:37,760 --> 00:48:39,113 And somebody else was saying, 644 00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:42,795 ''The niggers will never be able to run anything. It's madness. '' 645 00:48:42,880 --> 00:48:46,111 I mean, it was very standard stuff, but as they talked, 646 00:48:46,200 --> 00:48:48,111 they were all fiddling with their teeth. 647 00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:51,078 Their mouths were literally being gummed up. 648 00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:53,718 Why are you telling me this? 649 00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:56,872 Well, I thought you'd like that image, these men sitting around, 650 00:48:56,960 --> 00:48:59,793 ''I hate the niggers,'' all this syrup in their mouths. 651 00:48:59,880 --> 00:49:02,269 And did you agree with them? 652 00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:04,996 I didn't say that, did I? 653 00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:09,311 Thank you for the strawberries. 654 00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:12,198 -I really must go to bed now. -Of course. 655 00:49:15,560 --> 00:49:17,198 I just have one other thing I want to give you. 656 00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:21,193 -No, no, it's late, and I really... -Please. 657 00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:25,114 Just let me for a moment. I know you think I'm a snob, Mary... 658 00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:27,760 I really don't know what you think or believe and I... 659 00:49:27,840 --> 00:49:32,356 -I don't need to know. -I like taste, refinement. 660 00:49:32,440 --> 00:49:36,228 I really value that. I don't think that's a crime. 661 00:49:36,320 --> 00:49:39,869 And the idea of everything being reduced to total mediocrity, 662 00:49:39,960 --> 00:49:43,999 to the lowest common denominator, that does terrify me. 663 00:49:44,080 --> 00:49:48,392 -I hate the common herd. -So, you must hate me then, mustn't you? 664 00:49:48,480 --> 00:49:50,550 Because that's where I'm from. 665 00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:54,030 You really imagine I'd be here if that's what I felt? 666 00:49:55,640 --> 00:49:58,279 Is that what you think of me, Mary? 667 00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:02,114 I'd be really disappointed if that's what you thought of me. 668 00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:04,432 MARY: I had my chance then. 669 00:50:05,560 --> 00:50:08,597 I could tell him what I thought of him now. 670 00:50:08,680 --> 00:50:12,036 I so wish I could have found the words, Joe. 671 00:50:12,120 --> 00:50:13,678 I often think of that moment, 672 00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:16,797 imagine it again, in my head, and when I do that, 673 00:50:16,880 --> 00:50:20,429 I really demolish him. I'm incredibly eloquent. 674 00:50:20,520 --> 00:50:22,511 But I was a very young woman, 675 00:50:22,600 --> 00:50:26,957 and there was this older man playing some strange game with me. 676 00:50:28,000 --> 00:50:30,833 I don't think I did too badly. 677 00:50:30,920 --> 00:50:33,992 You want to know what I think of you, Greville? 678 00:50:34,080 --> 00:50:36,435 Well, I think you're a bit sad. 679 00:50:36,720 --> 00:50:39,712 Sad? In what way? 680 00:50:39,800 --> 00:50:42,792 For some reason, you see me as a threat. 681 00:50:42,880 --> 00:50:47,078 You know, a threat to your nice life and your country houses. 682 00:50:47,160 --> 00:50:49,958 Why on earth you should think that, I don't know. 683 00:50:50,040 --> 00:50:52,713 You know, maybe it's because I'm young, 684 00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:55,237 and a woman, of course, 685 00:50:57,320 --> 00:51:00,630 and you think I don't show enough respect or something. 686 00:51:00,720 --> 00:51:03,393 And you want to stop me being a threat. 687 00:51:04,640 --> 00:51:07,473 And that's rather sad, don't you think? 688 00:51:07,560 --> 00:51:10,711 Spending so much energy over somebody like me. 689 00:51:17,520 --> 00:51:20,956 Thank you for the strawberries and um... and good night. 690 00:51:23,640 --> 00:51:24,834 Right. 691 00:51:27,840 --> 00:51:31,628 If that is what you feel, you probably won't want this then. 692 00:51:33,280 --> 00:51:36,352 -But I really would urge you to take it. -I don't want it, whatever it is. 693 00:51:36,440 --> 00:51:39,955 Please, look inside, and then I'll go, I promise. 694 00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:57,912 What is this? The key to the wine cellar? 695 00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,230 It's the key to my house. 696 00:52:00,720 --> 00:52:01,755 To your house? 697 00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:03,273 Yes, and it doesn't mean what you think it does. 698 00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:04,793 No, whatever it means, I don't want it. 699 00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:08,555 And this isn't a trick or some cheap gesture. 700 00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:12,952 I want you to have the imagination to accept it, the key to my house. 701 00:52:14,040 --> 00:52:19,068 You can come there whenever you want. You can visit just once or many times. 702 00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:22,599 Just drop by, let yourself in, 703 00:52:22,680 --> 00:52:25,672 either alone or with a friend. 704 00:52:25,760 --> 00:52:27,079 Why on earth would I want to do that? 705 00:52:27,160 --> 00:52:28,673 There are all sorts of things in that house 706 00:52:28,760 --> 00:52:32,912 that I've collected over many years, over my whole life! 707 00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:34,877 If I happen to be there when you come by, 708 00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,155 I wouldn't try to touch you. 709 00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:41,599 I would never attempt to be your lover. 710 00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:48,518 Greville, that really is too strange. 711 00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:51,910 I really would urge you not to refuse straight away. 712 00:52:53,920 --> 00:52:57,230 How many of these do you hand out to girls each season? 713 00:52:57,320 --> 00:53:01,108 That is unkind, Mary. I had that specially made for you. 714 00:53:02,800 --> 00:53:06,429 And you won't believe me, but I've never done this before. 715 00:53:08,120 --> 00:53:11,556 -I thought we might help each other. -Help each other? 716 00:53:12,160 --> 00:53:13,513 -In what way? -In all sorts of ways. 717 00:53:13,600 --> 00:53:17,593 -What does that mean? -Professionally, of course. 718 00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:21,591 That goes without saying. 719 00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:24,677 And in other ways, too. 720 00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:30,433 -Help each other understand the world. -Good night, Greville. 721 00:53:30,720 --> 00:53:33,632 Don't give it back to me now, think about it overnight at least. 722 00:53:33,720 --> 00:53:35,551 I've thought about it. 723 00:53:55,960 --> 00:53:58,793 He didn't come bursting back in, did he? 724 00:53:58,880 --> 00:54:00,950 Or he didn't knock the door down, come rushing at you? 725 00:54:01,040 --> 00:54:03,918 No. No, Joe, he was a bit cleverer than that. 726 00:54:06,320 --> 00:54:08,470 I can still feel that night. 727 00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:11,112 How warm it was. 728 00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:15,030 How good I felt in that dress. 729 00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:19,910 But I was bloody nervous after he'd gone, 730 00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:21,831 with that creepy key. 731 00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:58,875 I thought, I'll leave very early, 732 00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:04,433 get away from this house, get on with my life. 733 00:55:04,520 --> 00:55:06,033 Never come back. 734 00:55:15,000 --> 00:55:16,672 WOMAN: Hello, Mary. 735 00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:21,796 I've got a letter for you. 736 00:55:21,880 --> 00:55:23,711 -A letter for me? -Yes. 737 00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:26,593 From Greville. 738 00:55:31,960 --> 00:55:34,952 -It's very early. -Yes, it is, isn't it? 739 00:55:36,040 --> 00:55:39,476 Sometimes I love to get up early. 740 00:55:39,560 --> 00:55:43,269 I don't think we've been properly introduced. 741 00:55:43,360 --> 00:55:46,477 -I'm Mary Gilbert. -And I'm Liza Henton. 742 00:55:47,560 --> 00:55:50,916 There, now we've done it properly. 743 00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:54,913 She looked so beautiful I couldn't help thinking, 744 00:55:55,000 --> 00:55:57,639 ''Does he have sex with this girl?'' 745 00:55:57,720 --> 00:56:00,359 Does he keep several of them in his house? 746 00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:03,716 I mean, did it all start with them being given keys? 747 00:56:09,520 --> 00:56:12,637 -Thank you. -He said that you should read it now, 748 00:56:12,720 --> 00:56:15,598 and that I should wait to see if there was a reply. 749 00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:19,673 -I'll read it when I get home. -He said if you could open it now. 750 00:56:21,480 --> 00:56:23,357 And then, I suddenly thought, 751 00:56:23,440 --> 00:56:26,193 what if it's the key again and I have accepted it, 752 00:56:26,280 --> 00:56:28,111 you know, unwittingly? 753 00:56:32,680 --> 00:56:34,750 Why don't you just open it? 754 00:56:38,360 --> 00:56:40,430 -No need to be nervous. -No. 755 00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:43,955 I assure you, I am not nervous. 756 00:56:47,240 --> 00:56:51,074 GREVILLE: My dear Mary, you disappointed me last night. 757 00:56:51,160 --> 00:56:53,355 You should have taken the key. 758 00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:57,069 Liza has handed you this letter, and just look at her. 759 00:56:57,160 --> 00:56:59,879 Does she appear in any way frightened of me? 760 00:56:59,960 --> 00:57:02,428 Why don't you ask her about me? 761 00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:04,317 Please come out for dinner with me tonight, 762 00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:08,518 so we can settle our differences, and part friends. 763 00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:11,876 It would be a much better way for us to end things. 764 00:57:14,520 --> 00:57:17,592 Thank you for waiting. There's no reply. 765 00:57:17,680 --> 00:57:19,432 -No reply at all? -No. 766 00:57:28,000 --> 00:57:29,228 (DOOR SLAMMING) 767 00:57:41,000 --> 00:57:43,958 MARY: For a few days nothing at all happened. 768 00:57:44,040 --> 00:57:46,235 I thought I'd got rid of him. 769 00:57:47,960 --> 00:57:50,110 Life was going on as normal. 770 00:57:58,040 --> 00:58:01,715 But then my trip to America was cancelled. 771 00:58:02,640 --> 00:58:03,959 They said to me, my bosses, 772 00:58:04,040 --> 00:58:07,510 they'd decided the timing wasn't quite right. 773 00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:11,309 And a few months later, my contract wasn't renewed. 774 00:58:14,680 --> 00:58:17,478 I was told my style of journalism, 775 00:58:17,560 --> 00:58:21,030 you know, the voice of youth, was no longer in fashion. 776 00:58:24,000 --> 00:58:25,956 I mean, I wasn't too disturbed. 777 00:58:26,040 --> 00:58:29,237 I felt I could get a job on any national newspaper 778 00:58:29,320 --> 00:58:31,515 after the success I had but 779 00:58:32,560 --> 00:58:37,156 one by one, for a whole variety of reasons, they said no. 780 00:58:37,240 --> 00:58:40,596 I heard that I was meant to be very difficult 781 00:58:42,080 --> 00:58:43,559 and unreliable 782 00:58:44,120 --> 00:58:45,473 and greedy! 783 00:58:46,760 --> 00:58:51,436 I realised Greville was behind it, of course. 784 00:58:51,520 --> 00:58:54,398 He was friendly with the newspaper proprietors 785 00:58:54,480 --> 00:58:57,472 and knew a lot about their personal lives, too. 786 00:58:59,320 --> 00:59:02,153 Well, didn't you find Greville, make him do something, or... 787 00:59:02,240 --> 00:59:05,437 No, I didn't, Joe. 788 00:59:05,520 --> 00:59:08,034 I just thought, well, what the hell? 789 00:59:09,160 --> 00:59:11,196 I've saved a little money, 790 00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:14,517 I need a break, you know, I'll go abroad... 791 00:59:14,600 --> 00:59:15,794 Travel. 792 00:59:17,600 --> 00:59:19,556 And write another book. 793 00:59:21,240 --> 00:59:23,071 And I did travel, Joe. 794 00:59:26,480 --> 00:59:28,471 I had a few love affairs, 795 00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:33,834 one of which was great fun, but I wasn't doing much writing. 796 00:59:34,520 --> 00:59:38,195 So, one day, I decided to come home. 797 01:00:00,520 --> 01:00:02,317 And I came back here. 798 01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:09,918 I was going out with a young painter at that time, 799 01:00:14,240 --> 01:00:17,152 and he'd become very fashionable, 800 01:00:17,240 --> 01:00:19,993 and he was invited by Mr Graham, 801 01:00:20,080 --> 01:00:22,992 and my lover said to me, you know, ''Why don't you come?'' 802 01:00:23,080 --> 01:00:24,991 And I thought, why not? 803 01:00:28,680 --> 01:00:30,238 If Greville happens to be there, 804 01:00:30,320 --> 01:00:32,550 which seems highly unlikely after all this time, 805 01:00:32,640 --> 01:00:34,312 I mean, what can he do to me now? 806 01:00:34,400 --> 01:00:36,072 He can do nothing. 807 01:00:38,680 --> 01:00:42,116 And I thought, you know, maybe I could do something to him. 808 01:00:42,200 --> 01:00:46,512 Be devastating, you know, be witty, reduce him to a little heap. 809 01:00:56,720 --> 01:00:58,756 It's so different! 810 01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:02,719 MARY: Mr Graham had torn out the beautiful conservatory 811 01:01:02,800 --> 01:01:05,519 and built this horrible modern room, 812 01:01:05,600 --> 01:01:08,273 you know, in an attempt to be with it. 813 01:01:10,560 --> 01:01:12,391 -Hello, how are you? -WOMAN: I'm okay, how are you? 814 01:01:12,480 --> 01:01:13,549 Yeah, I'm fine actually. 815 01:01:13,640 --> 01:01:16,473 MAN: You know, she used to write some really racy stuff, didn't you? 816 01:01:16,560 --> 01:01:20,473 -What do you mean, ''used to''? -And some quite heavy stuff, too. 817 01:01:20,560 --> 01:01:24,269 -She can really write, this one. -Oh, that's good to know! 818 01:01:24,360 --> 01:01:27,670 -See you in a while. -Okay. Speak to you later. 819 01:01:27,960 --> 01:01:30,758 -WOMAN: Where have you been? -Oh, I've been abroad. 820 01:01:30,840 --> 01:01:33,957 In the sun, you know, working, of course, writing and planning. 821 01:01:34,040 --> 01:01:35,268 WOMAN: And what have you been planning? 822 01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:39,353 Well, I'm planning a trilogy of books about now. 823 01:01:39,440 --> 01:01:42,398 -And what is the title of the books? -The title, well... 824 01:01:42,480 --> 01:01:46,314 I think the title will definitely have the word ''change'' in it, 825 01:01:46,400 --> 01:01:48,834 something about change. Or else, I was thinking... 826 01:01:48,920 --> 01:01:51,559 And there he was. Quite suddenly. 827 01:01:52,760 --> 01:01:54,910 Right there, 828 01:01:55,000 --> 01:01:58,549 all trussed up in a waistcoat, though it was summer. 829 01:01:59,840 --> 01:02:02,513 He seemed like he was from another age, 830 01:02:03,360 --> 01:02:05,237 like one of his wines. 831 01:02:06,320 --> 01:02:08,880 Trying to weave his spell as he worked the room. 832 01:02:09,000 --> 01:02:12,356 And soon we will be nostalgic for glamour again, 833 01:02:12,440 --> 01:02:16,433 long dresses and the funny old conservatory that used to be here. 834 01:02:17,520 --> 01:02:21,832 You don't see faces coming towards you any more, just an army of legs. 835 01:02:24,400 --> 01:02:27,153 It's the same with these new movies. 836 01:02:27,240 --> 01:02:30,949 People don't want their noses rubbed along the kitchen floor. 837 01:02:31,040 --> 01:02:32,473 Who is that guy? 838 01:02:32,560 --> 01:02:36,235 Oh, that's just somebody I used to know a long time ago. 839 01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:39,630 We once nearly shared a salad in this very house. 840 01:02:40,640 --> 01:02:42,232 And we... 841 01:02:42,320 --> 01:02:45,198 We did eat some strawberries together, too. 842 01:02:48,720 --> 01:02:50,438 With clotted cream. 843 01:02:51,080 --> 01:02:54,755 Squalid piece of work. I thought it was depressing. 844 01:03:04,400 --> 01:03:09,110 Oh, God! Oh, God, it is an ugly room, isn't it? 845 01:03:10,200 --> 01:03:14,273 Didn't you go up to him at this party? Didn't you say something? 846 01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:16,669 You should have got hold of him, yanked him in front of people. 847 01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:17,909 Did you do that? 848 01:03:18,000 --> 01:03:19,592 Did you say, ''You fucking prick! 849 01:03:19,680 --> 01:03:22,592 ''You done this to me, now you fucking do something about it 850 01:03:22,680 --> 01:03:23,829 ''and get me my job back!'' 851 01:03:23,920 --> 01:03:27,549 -I didn't say that, Joe, no. -You didn't? 852 01:03:27,640 --> 01:03:29,596 -I couldn't. -Well, why not? 853 01:03:29,680 --> 01:03:32,069 Don't get impatient with me, Joe, please. 854 01:03:32,160 --> 01:03:35,516 Sorry. I didn't mean to shout. 855 01:03:35,600 --> 01:03:37,352 I just want you to get this fucker, that's all. 856 01:03:37,440 --> 01:03:39,715 It wasn't going to be easy, Joe. 857 01:03:41,280 --> 01:03:44,192 Everything had moved on while I'd been on my travels. 858 01:03:44,280 --> 01:03:48,717 I was wearing the right clothes, of course, but inside... 859 01:03:48,800 --> 01:03:50,472 I felt a stranger. 860 01:03:52,400 --> 01:03:56,075 It really pays to be in the vanguard of things, Joe, 861 01:03:56,160 --> 01:03:58,071 to be one of the first. 862 01:03:58,760 --> 01:04:01,035 You're superseded very quickly. 863 01:04:01,440 --> 01:04:05,399 But much more important than that, I wasn't there in my own right. 864 01:04:05,480 --> 01:04:07,675 I was just with my boyfriend. 865 01:04:09,040 --> 01:04:12,112 I was thinking, I used to be invited here 866 01:04:12,200 --> 01:04:14,760 when I was a fashionable writer. 867 01:04:14,840 --> 01:04:17,434 I just want to talk to somebody over there. I'll be back. 868 01:04:17,520 --> 01:04:19,317 -Don't be long. -Okay. 869 01:04:31,640 --> 01:04:34,677 GREVILLE: People want fantasy and stories, 870 01:04:34,760 --> 01:04:36,990 beautiful worlds to escape to. 871 01:04:37,080 --> 01:04:39,992 I mean, that's always been the case and always will. 872 01:04:52,600 --> 01:04:56,354 And very sad, because writers tell us how to live our lives. 873 01:05:01,920 --> 01:05:03,717 Can't go wrong with Turkish Delight, 874 01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:06,872 and probably Turks have never even heard of it. 875 01:05:06,960 --> 01:05:09,076 Sorry, I'm just gabbling. 876 01:05:23,560 --> 01:05:24,879 Excuse me. 877 01:05:43,360 --> 01:05:45,715 Something happened at this party 878 01:05:46,600 --> 01:05:48,795 that had a big effect on me. 879 01:05:49,080 --> 01:05:52,231 I mean, a lot of what they say is new about these movies 880 01:05:52,320 --> 01:05:55,039 has, in fact, been done loads of times before. 881 01:05:55,120 --> 01:05:58,396 Greville likes to talk, doesn't he? 882 01:05:58,480 --> 01:06:00,755 GREVILLE: Done by people who were true artists, 883 01:06:00,840 --> 01:06:03,593 and that is why their work hasn't dated. 884 01:06:04,200 --> 01:06:06,236 Unlike this new breed now, 885 01:06:06,840 --> 01:06:09,513 who are addicted to gimmicks and the latest fad. 886 01:06:09,600 --> 01:06:11,670 MARY: And this man suddenly piped up... 887 01:06:11,760 --> 01:06:13,591 That's complete crap! 888 01:06:15,720 --> 01:06:18,837 Everything you said is just such utter bollocks! 889 01:06:21,480 --> 01:06:23,994 MARY: He'd no respect for this older man in a waistcoat. 890 01:06:24,080 --> 01:06:25,991 He just gave it to him and went. 891 01:06:29,080 --> 01:06:30,877 What a charming young man. 892 01:06:30,960 --> 01:06:33,918 Fascinating that he wanted to share his opinions with us. 893 01:06:34,000 --> 01:06:36,798 MARY: I thought, ''I should have done that. 894 01:06:38,560 --> 01:06:41,279 ''Why don't I do that to Greville?'' 895 01:06:46,440 --> 01:06:49,000 And then, of course, I realised 896 01:06:49,080 --> 01:06:52,390 I could never talk to Greville like that. 897 01:06:52,480 --> 01:06:54,948 Brutal and rude, I don't know. 898 01:06:56,680 --> 01:07:00,195 I just, maybe because I belonged to another time, I... 899 01:07:01,160 --> 01:07:03,833 I don't know why I couldn't. 900 01:07:03,920 --> 01:07:05,273 Because I was afraid. 901 01:07:05,360 --> 01:07:07,749 I couldn't even go up to him at that party. 902 01:07:07,840 --> 01:07:10,149 He's looking for someone else to talk to, 903 01:07:10,240 --> 01:07:12,879 to engage with, and I'm almost hiding! 904 01:07:14,600 --> 01:07:15,874 And then, 905 01:07:16,800 --> 01:07:19,234 he looks at me. 906 01:07:21,040 --> 01:07:22,632 He looks across at me, 907 01:07:24,000 --> 01:07:28,516 and though he didn't say anything, I could hear him saying... 908 01:07:28,600 --> 01:07:30,033 But you're still mine. 909 01:07:35,360 --> 01:07:38,636 But you're still mine, aren't you, Mary? 910 01:07:50,120 --> 01:07:51,997 I tried not to run, 911 01:07:52,080 --> 01:07:54,958 not to look like I was fleeing his presence. 912 01:08:15,720 --> 01:08:18,075 I didn't want to creep out of there either, 913 01:08:18,160 --> 01:08:21,869 but I got away from this house as quick as I could. 914 01:08:31,760 --> 01:08:34,957 What, you left here without saying anything to him? 915 01:08:36,120 --> 01:08:39,112 That's right. I left him looking for me. 916 01:08:42,480 --> 01:08:45,313 But you did speak to him again, didn't you? 917 01:08:49,520 --> 01:08:50,669 Go on. 918 01:08:57,000 --> 01:08:58,911 MARY: For a few months, 919 01:09:00,000 --> 01:09:01,638 or maybe a year, 920 01:09:02,520 --> 01:09:05,557 I sunk myself into my love affair 921 01:09:05,840 --> 01:09:07,478 with the artist. 922 01:09:07,960 --> 01:09:10,349 He was getting really successful, 923 01:09:11,440 --> 01:09:12,953 almost famous. 924 01:09:17,880 --> 01:09:21,395 But he was very careful with money, 925 01:09:23,520 --> 01:09:25,511 extremely mean, in fact. 926 01:09:32,320 --> 01:09:36,029 So for a time we lived in this bedsit, 927 01:09:36,120 --> 01:09:39,271 and he disappeared for days on end to his studio. 928 01:09:39,960 --> 01:09:43,794 When he wasn't painting, he was thinking deep thoughts. 929 01:09:48,840 --> 01:09:51,957 He had an awful lot of deep thoughts, it seems. 930 01:09:52,640 --> 01:09:55,029 None of which I ever got to hear. 931 01:09:57,200 --> 01:10:00,510 And the room was just crammed with his things, 932 01:10:00,600 --> 01:10:02,556 as well as his thoughts. 933 01:10:03,200 --> 01:10:08,957 And I started having a little tipple at various moments of the day. 934 01:10:09,640 --> 01:10:11,790 I found it helped the creative flow. 935 01:10:11,880 --> 01:10:13,518 Shit! Fuck! 936 01:10:14,600 --> 01:10:16,511 Oh, I nearly cut myself! 937 01:10:16,600 --> 01:10:18,511 Stepped on one of your bloody wine glasses! 938 01:10:18,600 --> 01:10:23,390 I told you so many times, don't leave glasses on the floor, okay? 939 01:10:23,480 --> 01:10:24,959 It's a real pigsty in here! 940 01:10:25,040 --> 01:10:26,917 You have to clear it all up, you understand? 941 01:10:27,000 --> 01:10:29,514 Yeah, I understand. 942 01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:33,434 I'll write it down a hundred times, ''It's a real pigsty in here.'' 943 01:10:33,520 --> 01:10:34,669 And then what are you going to do about it? 944 01:10:34,760 --> 01:10:37,399 -What am I going to do about it? -Yes. 945 01:10:39,920 --> 01:10:41,751 Well, maybe I'll start by making a list 946 01:10:41,840 --> 01:10:44,593 of all the things of yours I'm not allowed to throw out. 947 01:10:44,680 --> 01:10:47,319 ''What are you doing, Mary? You've moved the cornflake packet.'' 948 01:10:47,400 --> 01:10:49,072 When have I ever said that? 949 01:10:49,160 --> 01:10:51,469 You always say things like that! 950 01:10:51,560 --> 01:10:53,630 I mean, just the other day you accused me of throwing out 951 01:10:53,720 --> 01:10:56,109 that stupid little green cloth 952 01:10:56,200 --> 01:10:58,191 you're forever wiping the gramophone with. 953 01:10:58,280 --> 01:11:00,714 Just clean the place up, okay? 954 01:11:03,000 --> 01:11:06,310 After all, you've got the time, haven't you? 955 01:11:06,400 --> 01:11:08,470 What, unlike you, you mean? 956 01:11:09,040 --> 01:11:12,794 Yes. I don't know what you do all day, Mary. 957 01:11:23,560 --> 01:11:27,553 I was beginning to write again, another attempt at a novel. 958 01:11:28,640 --> 01:11:31,393 Outside all sorts of new things were happening 959 01:11:31,480 --> 01:11:35,234 and I thought I should be able to catch them, describe them. 960 01:11:36,680 --> 01:11:38,716 But the funny thing was 961 01:11:41,400 --> 01:11:45,916 it didn't matter whether I started the story on a train, 962 01:11:46,000 --> 01:11:49,151 or in the desert, or outside Buckingham Palace... 963 01:12:19,000 --> 01:12:22,310 it always, always led back to the cellar 964 01:12:23,200 --> 01:12:24,679 and Greville. 965 01:12:42,160 --> 01:12:43,388 (CHURCH BELLS RINGING) 966 01:12:43,480 --> 01:12:47,314 One day, I started to write directly on a typewriter. 967 01:12:47,400 --> 01:12:51,313 Up till then, I'd always done the first draft in longhand. 968 01:12:51,400 --> 01:12:53,038 It was a nice day. 969 01:12:53,120 --> 01:12:55,156 There were church bells outside the window, 970 01:12:55,240 --> 01:12:58,232 somebody was getting married down the street. 971 01:12:59,720 --> 01:13:01,392 And I was flying, 972 01:13:02,480 --> 01:13:04,789 absolutely flying with my story. 973 01:13:25,680 --> 01:13:28,319 (PING-PONG BALL BOUNCING) 974 01:13:37,440 --> 01:13:38,953 (GROANING) 975 01:13:46,400 --> 01:13:48,960 And then I wasn't flying any more. 976 01:13:51,480 --> 01:13:52,629 Every time this happened, 977 01:13:52,720 --> 01:13:55,518 my confidence took a further little knock. 978 01:13:59,640 --> 01:14:01,471 When you have success, 979 01:14:02,480 --> 01:14:04,789 without really thinking about it, when you're very young 980 01:14:04,880 --> 01:14:07,952 and you're not quite sure how you did all that, 981 01:14:09,960 --> 01:14:13,430 your confidence can go amazingly quickly when things go wrong. 982 01:14:18,720 --> 01:14:21,029 Escape wasn't proving easy, Joe. 983 01:14:25,720 --> 01:14:29,235 I knew a lot of people, you know, friends, acquaintances, 984 01:14:29,320 --> 01:14:31,834 who'd become successful round that time 985 01:14:31,920 --> 01:14:35,276 and then destroyed themselves with drink and drugs. 986 01:14:43,440 --> 01:14:47,558 And I decided I was definitely not going to be one of them. 987 01:14:53,160 --> 01:14:55,720 -Try my hardest. -Good. 988 01:14:57,680 --> 01:15:00,797 -I pulled myself together. -Great! 989 01:15:00,880 --> 01:15:03,235 Yeah, I started going out again, 990 01:15:03,320 --> 01:15:05,754 attending private views with my boyfriend. 991 01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:08,673 (PSYCHEDELIC MUSIC PLAYING) 992 01:15:18,520 --> 01:15:21,751 Of course, I realised that there was a slight chance 993 01:15:21,840 --> 01:15:23,671 I might see Greville, 994 01:15:25,160 --> 01:15:26,798 but I was ready for it. 995 01:15:26,880 --> 01:15:30,429 Well, yeah, because you ain't spoken to him about him getting you fired. 996 01:15:30,520 --> 01:15:34,115 -I hadn't, no. -Oh, you gotta speak to him about that. 997 01:15:35,000 --> 01:15:36,479 That's right. 998 01:15:40,040 --> 01:15:46,275 So at one particular private view, being held at a house in the country, 999 01:15:46,360 --> 01:15:49,113 I was sitting there with my boyfriend. 1000 01:15:49,200 --> 01:15:53,398 We'd been breaking up for months, only we'd been doing it in slow motion, 1001 01:15:53,480 --> 01:15:55,072 a little bit each week. 1002 01:15:55,160 --> 01:15:59,358 On this particular night, what we were saying to each other was... 1003 01:15:59,440 --> 01:16:01,635 It was fairly terminal. 1004 01:16:01,720 --> 01:16:07,477 Maybe it's because I need more space. 1005 01:16:07,560 --> 01:16:11,599 I think I really do need a lot more space. 1006 01:16:11,680 --> 01:16:17,869 He was too mean to buy more space, so he had to kick me out instead. 1007 01:16:17,960 --> 01:16:20,872 Naturally, I wasn't slow in pointing this out. 1008 01:16:20,960 --> 01:16:22,791 You know what, Zach? 1009 01:16:22,880 --> 01:16:26,475 The other day, I was trying to think of the last thing you bought me, 1010 01:16:26,560 --> 01:16:30,155 any, any kind of present. You know what it was? 1011 01:16:31,040 --> 01:16:34,669 A single pink balloon to celebrate my birthday. 1012 01:16:34,760 --> 01:16:36,796 I don't believe in birthdays. Never have. 1013 01:16:36,880 --> 01:16:41,556 -Now, why doesn't that surprise me? -But I know what you'd like. 1014 01:16:42,240 --> 01:16:44,708 What would I like? 1015 01:16:44,800 --> 01:16:48,156 You'd like a crate of vodka delivered at the beginning of every week. 1016 01:16:48,240 --> 01:16:52,438 You'd wake up, there it would be at the end of the bed. 1017 01:16:53,640 --> 01:16:57,633 Once a week? That certainly wouldn't be enough. 1018 01:16:58,120 --> 01:17:02,113 So there we were, right in the middle of our break-up, 1019 01:17:02,200 --> 01:17:05,237 and there... 1020 01:17:05,320 --> 01:17:07,390 there was Greville. 1021 01:17:07,480 --> 01:17:10,995 Hello. I saw you at the Glyn-Parrys, in August? 1022 01:17:11,080 --> 01:17:12,354 You don't remember? 1023 01:17:12,440 --> 01:17:13,634 I think we were sitting quite near each other. 1024 01:17:13,720 --> 01:17:16,598 MARY: He was dressed in his usual old-fashioned way, 1025 01:17:16,680 --> 01:17:20,514 almost defiantly out of keeping with the times. 1026 01:17:20,600 --> 01:17:23,194 He keeps avoiding catching my eye. 1027 01:17:23,280 --> 01:17:27,478 I mean, he knows I'm there. I know he's seen me, but he... 1028 01:17:27,560 --> 01:17:29,994 He won't look at me. 1029 01:17:30,080 --> 01:17:34,232 You know, he's smiling and trying to gossip with people. 1030 01:17:36,840 --> 01:17:38,910 Did you enjoy the exhibition? 1031 01:17:39,000 --> 01:17:42,072 Tell me, were they meant to be people or fruit? 1032 01:17:42,160 --> 01:17:44,151 -What? -The shapes. 1033 01:17:44,240 --> 01:17:45,719 They looked like fruit to me. 1034 01:17:45,800 --> 01:17:47,518 But somebody said they were meant to be people. 1035 01:17:47,600 --> 01:17:51,479 MARY: And Liza was there as well. She was dressed very oddly, too. 1036 01:17:51,560 --> 01:17:53,755 Almost like her mother might have been. 1037 01:17:53,840 --> 01:17:57,276 I'm having a party in my little flat in Kensington in a few weeks, 1038 01:17:57,360 --> 01:17:58,713 I do hope you'll come. 1039 01:17:58,800 --> 01:18:02,110 MARY: She was still very young, and yet she looked so out of place. 1040 01:18:02,200 --> 01:18:05,590 Apparently, there are only 1 2 interesting people in London, 1041 01:18:05,680 --> 01:18:09,070 and so it will have to be a very tiny gathering, as you can imagine. 1042 01:18:09,160 --> 01:18:11,151 But you are one of them. 1043 01:18:11,240 --> 01:18:13,435 Hello. Did you get my letter? 1044 01:18:13,920 --> 01:18:17,390 The post is terrible, isn't it? Well, I've had an idea for a book. 1045 01:18:17,480 --> 01:18:20,358 I was wondering if we could talk about it? 1046 01:18:20,440 --> 01:18:22,635 It's a memoir, really. 1047 01:18:22,720 --> 01:18:24,631 I think it would make quite a lively read. 1048 01:18:24,720 --> 01:18:27,280 The time I spent with Lloyd George and Churchill. 1049 01:18:27,360 --> 01:18:30,830 Yes, I worked on Churchill's papers. 1050 01:18:31,520 --> 01:18:34,717 I got to know him quite well. I got drunk with him, actually. 1051 01:18:34,800 --> 01:18:36,756 MARY: It was like their joke on the world, 1052 01:18:36,840 --> 01:18:39,229 you know, this strange couple weaving some sort of spell. 1053 01:18:39,320 --> 01:18:40,719 I must take you out for a meal. 1054 01:18:40,800 --> 01:18:43,633 MARY: It wasn't really working any more. 1055 01:18:43,720 --> 01:18:47,110 I think you'll be surprised, in more ways than one. 1056 01:18:47,200 --> 01:18:48,713 Give me a ring. 1057 01:18:52,680 --> 01:18:55,797 MARY: But it's like he knew his power was on the wane. 1058 01:18:55,880 --> 01:18:57,518 (SIGHS) 1059 01:18:58,480 --> 01:19:03,156 The great newspaper proprietors he was close to were now dead. 1060 01:19:03,240 --> 01:19:06,437 He didn't have nearly so many influential friends. 1061 01:19:09,120 --> 01:19:11,873 He was standing very straight, 1062 01:19:11,960 --> 01:19:18,229 you know, like he was determined not to be engulfed by this new world. 1063 01:19:18,320 --> 01:19:21,710 This world he had first sensed, maybe, when he met me. 1064 01:19:23,600 --> 01:19:27,149 I was almost relishing watching him like that, 1065 01:19:27,240 --> 01:19:29,993 and I was thinking about Liza. 1066 01:19:32,240 --> 01:19:34,390 Yes, yes, he was rather interesting... 1067 01:19:34,480 --> 01:19:36,550 MARY: Was that what he'd wanted me to become? 1068 01:19:36,640 --> 01:19:38,870 ...an interesting person to my interesting party. 1069 01:19:38,960 --> 01:19:41,235 Was he one of the 1 2 most interesting men in London? 1070 01:19:41,320 --> 01:19:43,151 Apparently, yes. Yes. 1071 01:19:43,240 --> 01:19:45,356 What number does that make me, I wonder? 1072 01:19:45,440 --> 01:19:47,829 Well, of course, you're number one, Greville! 1073 01:19:47,920 --> 01:19:51,993 MARY: And then their car draws up and they both get in. 1074 01:19:52,080 --> 01:19:56,039 I'm feeling almost relaxed now. They're going, 1075 01:19:57,120 --> 01:19:59,031 and nothing has happened. 1076 01:19:59,120 --> 01:20:02,112 Nothing bad has occurred at all. 1077 01:20:02,200 --> 01:20:07,274 And I remember so clearly watching them together in the back of the car. 1078 01:20:07,360 --> 01:20:08,793 The car draws off. 1079 01:20:16,240 --> 01:20:20,074 And then, he stares straight at me. He mouths... 1080 01:20:20,160 --> 01:20:22,037 Help me! 1081 01:20:22,120 --> 01:20:23,348 Help me! 1082 01:20:25,280 --> 01:20:28,716 ''Help me, Mary!'' 1083 01:20:29,200 --> 01:20:30,713 Help me, Mary! 1084 01:20:35,040 --> 01:20:36,268 Help me! 1085 01:20:38,240 --> 01:20:42,916 It wasn't a pathetic cry,Joe. Quite the reverse. 1086 01:20:43,600 --> 01:20:45,830 It was terrifying. 1087 01:20:45,920 --> 01:20:47,638 Help me, Mary. 1088 01:20:48,520 --> 01:20:49,748 Help me. 1089 01:21:27,080 --> 01:21:29,799 And then I never saw him again, Joe. 1090 01:21:30,080 --> 01:21:31,195 What? 1091 01:21:32,480 --> 01:21:34,357 -You didn't? -No. 1092 01:21:35,960 --> 01:21:38,679 You never ever said anything about what he'd done to you? 1093 01:21:38,760 --> 01:21:40,113 No. 1094 01:21:40,200 --> 01:21:43,078 You didn't ring him up or anything and say, 1095 01:21:43,160 --> 01:21:46,835 ''Why should I help you? You did this terrible thing to me.'' 1096 01:21:49,040 --> 01:21:50,075 No. 1097 01:22:06,200 --> 01:22:08,395 I didn't see him again, Joe. 1098 01:22:09,480 --> 01:22:11,357 Until today. 1099 01:22:11,960 --> 01:22:15,555 -Today? -I saw him today. 1100 01:22:16,320 --> 01:22:19,596 But, well, he must be old, mustn't he? 1101 01:22:19,680 --> 01:22:24,356 I mean, it's a long time ago. He must be an incredibly old man. 1102 01:22:24,440 --> 01:22:27,671 You would have thought so, wouldn't you, Joe? 1103 01:22:27,760 --> 01:22:29,432 What do you mean? 1104 01:22:30,440 --> 01:22:32,317 Where did you see him? 1105 01:22:39,760 --> 01:22:42,638 MARY: I often go for a walk in the park in the morning. 1106 01:22:42,720 --> 01:22:45,871 And usually it's all right, alone with one's thoughts, 1107 01:22:45,960 --> 01:22:47,837 planning the next day. 1108 01:22:49,560 --> 01:22:51,073 GREVILLE: Mary! 1109 01:22:54,320 --> 01:22:55,435 Mary! 1110 01:23:16,800 --> 01:23:20,634 I didn't hear my name again, so I just got on with my walk. 1111 01:23:26,760 --> 01:23:30,514 And I'm dimly aware of this figure just a little further on, 1112 01:23:30,600 --> 01:23:33,797 keeping pace with me, walking along another path. 1113 01:23:37,560 --> 01:23:39,676 He didn't seem to be looking at me. 1114 01:23:39,760 --> 01:23:43,594 I realised, you know, he must have been calling somebody else. 1115 01:23:46,560 --> 01:23:49,154 You know, I get to my usual spot. 1116 01:23:50,040 --> 01:23:53,032 I often sit there for a few minutes. 1117 01:24:04,360 --> 01:24:05,679 GREVILLE: Mary. 1118 01:24:08,320 --> 01:24:09,753 Mary. 1119 01:24:09,840 --> 01:24:13,674 And I thought, ''Looks terribly like Greville. 1120 01:24:13,760 --> 01:24:17,753 ''No, that's impossible, because he's not old. '' 1121 01:24:17,840 --> 01:24:20,354 And Greville was much older than me. 1122 01:24:27,640 --> 01:24:30,313 No. No, it must be somebody else. 1123 01:24:32,480 --> 01:24:36,871 Now, I know what you're thinking, it was the drink. 1124 01:24:36,960 --> 01:24:41,511 This drink, in fact. And, of course, you could be right, Joe. 1125 01:24:43,960 --> 01:24:47,350 Because this isn't a ghost story. No. 1126 01:24:48,040 --> 01:24:50,634 No, this is worse than a ghost story. 1127 01:24:51,520 --> 01:24:53,192 For me, anyway. 1128 01:24:53,880 --> 01:24:54,949 Why? 1129 01:24:55,640 --> 01:24:58,518 Well, what happened? Did he come any closer? 1130 01:25:00,960 --> 01:25:02,757 It's very important, 1131 01:25:02,840 --> 01:25:04,671 because of what happens next, for you to understand. 1132 01:25:04,760 --> 01:25:08,833 I don't usually sit in the park in the morning feeling sorry for myself. 1133 01:25:08,920 --> 01:25:10,353 I hate the idea. 1134 01:25:10,440 --> 01:25:14,399 I haven't spent all these years in self-pity. 1135 01:25:14,480 --> 01:25:18,314 -Do you follow that, Joe? -Yeah. 1136 01:25:18,400 --> 01:25:22,996 I mean, I had rebuilt, you know, a sort of career for myself 1137 01:25:23,080 --> 01:25:26,311 after the setbacks caused by Greville. 1138 01:25:26,400 --> 01:25:28,834 You know, I've written for magazines 1139 01:25:28,920 --> 01:25:32,469 about gardening and lifestyle and antiques. 1140 01:25:32,560 --> 01:25:34,949 I've been able to earn a reasonable living. 1141 01:25:35,040 --> 01:25:39,352 You know, many people would think I'd been lucky to lead such a life. 1142 01:25:40,240 --> 01:25:44,392 -Do you understand me, Joe? -Yeah, I do. 1143 01:25:49,840 --> 01:25:51,910 I thought it was you, Mary. 1144 01:25:53,720 --> 01:25:55,790 What are you doing here? 1145 01:25:56,680 --> 01:25:58,398 All on your own? 1146 01:25:59,280 --> 01:26:03,990 I always thought if I saw you again, it would be in this park, 1147 01:26:04,080 --> 01:26:06,275 and you would be on your own. 1148 01:26:07,880 --> 01:26:09,233 MARY: I couldn't speak, 1149 01:26:09,320 --> 01:26:12,312 but he seemed to sense what I was thinking. 1150 01:26:12,400 --> 01:26:14,356 I am not alone, in fact. 1151 01:26:15,720 --> 01:26:17,631 MARY: I peered at them. 1152 01:26:19,120 --> 01:26:21,554 Could one of them have been Liza? 1153 01:26:22,240 --> 01:26:24,470 GREVILLE: How's it been, Mary? 1154 01:26:25,960 --> 01:26:27,757 Everything you hoped? 1155 01:26:29,920 --> 01:26:31,273 Silly girl. 1156 01:26:32,680 --> 01:26:36,195 If it was an hallucination, it was a very sustained one. 1157 01:26:39,080 --> 01:26:41,071 Suddenly, he was close. 1158 01:26:41,160 --> 01:26:44,755 I kept looking for your name. I could never find it. 1159 01:26:46,280 --> 01:26:49,317 I've had some painful things happen to me, too. 1160 01:26:51,120 --> 01:26:53,475 We could have helped each other. 1161 01:26:53,960 --> 01:26:55,393 Like I said. 1162 01:26:57,360 --> 01:27:00,636 All you could think was that I wanted to catch you, 1163 01:27:00,720 --> 01:27:02,153 control you. 1164 01:27:03,600 --> 01:27:06,353 Where have you been all this time, Mary? 1165 01:27:08,040 --> 01:27:10,315 Where is the bright young girl? 1166 01:27:12,320 --> 01:27:14,470 I can see no sign of her. 1167 01:27:16,840 --> 01:27:18,353 No sign at all. 1168 01:27:39,560 --> 01:27:43,235 MARY: The very first thing I thought about after he'd gone, it was funny, 1169 01:27:43,320 --> 01:27:44,469 it was I suddenly understood 1170 01:27:44,560 --> 01:27:48,269 why he was always there at Mr Graham's parties. 1171 01:27:48,360 --> 01:27:50,078 I realised right then 1172 01:27:50,160 --> 01:27:53,709 it must have been because he knew something about Mr Graham's past. 1173 01:27:55,040 --> 01:27:58,077 For a moment, I was quite excited to have worked that out. 1174 01:28:04,720 --> 01:28:06,119 But then, 1175 01:28:10,640 --> 01:28:13,677 I started thinking the worst possible thoughts. 1176 01:28:21,680 --> 01:28:23,477 What might have been. 1177 01:28:42,200 --> 01:28:44,839 How stupid I was 1178 01:28:44,920 --> 01:28:48,276 to think I could take on that world when I was so very young. 1179 01:28:55,040 --> 01:28:59,795 If only I'd been 1 0 years older, or been born 1180 01:29:00,480 --> 01:29:02,277 a few years later, 1181 01:29:03,160 --> 01:29:05,230 when things were different. 1182 01:29:07,680 --> 01:29:10,319 A young woman in that house. 1183 01:29:15,600 --> 01:29:17,955 It shouldn't ever have happened. 1184 01:29:24,240 --> 01:29:27,789 And I've never been able to shake it off, all this time. 1185 01:29:32,000 --> 01:29:33,831 How idiotic is that? 1186 01:29:38,880 --> 01:29:41,553 And I was thinking, too, 1187 01:29:42,240 --> 01:29:48,509 have I used what happened with Greville as an excuse, my whole life, 1188 01:29:49,600 --> 01:29:51,352 for the loss of my talent? 1189 01:29:58,720 --> 01:30:02,998 I remembered his party trick of seeing yourself as others see you. 1190 01:30:16,800 --> 01:30:18,438 And all the time, 1191 01:30:19,720 --> 01:30:21,676 there was this sensation 1192 01:30:23,840 --> 01:30:26,308 like the lights being turned down. 1193 01:30:31,560 --> 01:30:35,519 Things closing in, shutting down. 1194 01:30:39,480 --> 01:30:43,359 Suddenly, I found it difficult to breathe. 1195 01:30:45,040 --> 01:30:47,793 It was an utterly horrible feeling,Joe. 1196 01:31:15,160 --> 01:31:17,276 (SOBBING) 1197 01:32:12,880 --> 01:32:17,431 Anyway, it was disgraceful, Joe, my exhibition. 1198 01:32:18,400 --> 01:32:19,879 You know, 1199 01:32:21,160 --> 01:32:23,116 crying for one's youth. 1200 01:32:24,920 --> 01:32:27,036 What a useless thing to do. 1201 01:32:36,640 --> 01:32:37,993 I ran away. 1202 01:32:41,520 --> 01:32:43,511 I ran away from the park. 1203 01:32:52,880 --> 01:32:54,393 But at least 1204 01:32:55,920 --> 01:32:57,319 that feeling 1205 01:32:59,360 --> 01:33:01,316 of things shutting down, 1206 01:33:03,600 --> 01:33:05,238 of it all ending, 1207 01:33:08,400 --> 01:33:09,879 I fought that. 1208 01:33:12,920 --> 01:33:15,036 He didn't manage that. 1209 01:33:17,480 --> 01:33:23,237 And somehow, I managed to come here. 1210 01:33:26,120 --> 01:33:30,113 Something I've been thinking about for years, 1211 01:33:31,320 --> 01:33:33,117 to come back here, 1212 01:33:34,200 --> 01:33:35,918 confront the place. 1213 01:33:37,600 --> 01:33:38,794 Today, 1214 01:33:40,040 --> 01:33:41,598 after the park, 1215 01:33:45,080 --> 01:33:47,310 I just walked straight here. 1216 01:33:48,960 --> 01:33:51,394 It seemed the obvious thing to do. 1217 01:33:55,560 --> 01:33:58,199 And you were kind enough to let me in. 1218 01:33:59,000 --> 01:34:04,438 -You came to see if he was here? -To see if I could get rid of a ghost. 1219 01:34:06,160 --> 01:34:08,594 Which isn't a ghost, of course. 1220 01:34:14,360 --> 01:34:16,191 Not a proper ghost. 1221 01:34:18,720 --> 01:34:20,153 And have you? 1222 01:34:25,240 --> 01:34:26,468 Have you? 1223 01:34:28,360 --> 01:34:32,319 -I'm sorry, Joe, I have to go now. -Well, you have, haven't you? 1224 01:34:32,720 --> 01:34:34,233 Got rid of him? 1225 01:34:34,920 --> 01:34:36,035 Yes. 1226 01:34:36,520 --> 01:34:37,873 Promise me? 1227 01:34:40,680 --> 01:34:45,356 Yes. Uh, don't bother to show me out, Joe, I know the way. 1228 01:34:45,440 --> 01:34:47,635 I've just got to get out of this house! 1229 01:34:47,720 --> 01:34:51,076 -Are you going to the park tomorrow? -Yeah, I might do. 1230 01:34:51,160 --> 01:34:52,673 Can I come, too? 1231 01:34:54,160 --> 01:34:57,675 -See where it happened? -See if he's still there, you mean? 1232 01:34:57,760 --> 01:35:01,719 -1 1 :00, hope I turn up. -Which park? 1233 01:35:02,400 --> 01:35:04,311 But you ain't told me which park! 1234 01:35:07,480 --> 01:35:09,152 Kensington Gardens. 1235 01:35:09,240 --> 01:35:10,309 (DOOR SLAMMING) 1236 01:35:17,080 --> 01:35:20,390 JOE: She'd given me the time and the park, 1237 01:35:21,280 --> 01:35:23,316 but not where she'd be. 1238 01:35:26,480 --> 01:35:28,675 I looked and looked for her. 1239 01:35:29,960 --> 01:35:31,188 I didn't find her. 1240 01:35:35,840 --> 01:35:40,470 And then, at last, just when I was going, 1241 01:35:40,560 --> 01:35:42,039 there she was. 1242 01:35:51,600 --> 01:35:52,953 Hello, Joe. 1243 01:35:54,280 --> 01:35:57,477 Here I am. You didn't think I'd come. 1244 01:36:01,680 --> 01:36:03,716 JOE: We walked in silence. 1245 01:36:05,040 --> 01:36:07,395 She didn't seem to want to talk. 1246 01:36:09,160 --> 01:36:11,628 I don't know what she was thinking. 1247 01:36:23,960 --> 01:36:25,757 Oh, is this the spot? 1248 01:36:26,640 --> 01:36:28,551 Yeah, this is the spot. 1249 01:36:34,040 --> 01:36:36,634 JOE: I still didn't know what to say. 1250 01:36:38,760 --> 01:36:40,796 So I didn't say anything. 1251 01:36:54,440 --> 01:36:56,192 You can go now, Joe. 1252 01:36:58,440 --> 01:37:00,271 Thank you for staying. 1253 01:37:01,040 --> 01:37:02,314 It's okay. 1254 01:37:03,040 --> 01:37:04,519 It'll be fine. 1255 01:37:05,080 --> 01:37:06,638 I'll be fine. 1256 01:37:08,800 --> 01:37:11,473 -You helped me. -Right. 1257 01:37:12,520 --> 01:37:15,398 But I just need to be on my own now. 1258 01:37:18,880 --> 01:37:21,440 You can leave, Joe. It's okay. 1259 01:37:22,520 --> 01:37:23,839 I promise. 1260 01:37:32,560 --> 01:37:34,596 JOE: So, I left her there. 1261 01:37:35,840 --> 01:37:37,796 And she did seem better, 1262 01:37:38,760 --> 01:37:39,988 I think. 1263 01:37:41,160 --> 01:37:43,116 She was sitting there looking quite elegant, 1264 01:37:43,200 --> 01:37:45,509 reading a book, when I left her. 1265 01:37:55,040 --> 01:37:57,076 I keep thinking about her. 1266 01:37:58,160 --> 01:38:00,230 Things I still want to ask. 1267 01:38:02,600 --> 01:38:05,068 I'll go back tomorrow to the park, 1268 01:38:06,400 --> 01:38:08,709 but I expect she won't be there. 1269 01:38:12,160 --> 01:38:14,390 There was something about her. 1270 01:38:26,680 --> 01:38:28,318 I like that lady. 1271 01:38:29,000 --> 01:38:31,309 I hope she never sees him again. 100474

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