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1
00:00:05,303 --> 00:00:07,206
Rocketed
from a distant planet,
2
00:00:07,272 --> 00:00:09,675
to a bold new destiny
on Earth,
3
00:00:09,742 --> 00:00:13,612
found by a Kansas family
and raised as Clark Kent,
4
00:00:13,679 --> 00:00:16,882
he learned he possessed
the strength of steel,
the speed of light
5
00:00:16,949 --> 00:00:19,986
and the desire
to help all mankind.
6
00:00:20,052 --> 00:00:22,855
He is Superboy!
7
00:00:46,445 --> 00:00:49,181
[man] Traffic's backed up
on the northbound expressway.
8
00:00:49,248 --> 00:00:51,283
All other routes
are moving along nicely.
9
00:00:51,349 --> 00:00:53,118
The current temperature's
an even 70.
10
00:00:53,185 --> 00:00:55,788
It looks like another
beautiful day, Capital City.
11
00:00:55,854 --> 00:00:59,591
And now it's time for
America's number one
syndicated talk show,
12
00:00:59,658 --> 00:01:01,093
the Judy Hour.
13
00:01:01,159 --> 00:01:03,262
And here's your host,
Judy Donatello!
14
00:01:05,664 --> 00:01:08,633
Thank you, Bob.
I am so excited.
15
00:01:08,700 --> 00:01:11,404
Today is our first day
on our new satellite system
16
00:01:11,470 --> 00:01:13,739
and have we got a show
for you.
17
00:01:13,806 --> 00:01:16,642
It's all about
bizarre relationships.
18
00:01:16,708 --> 00:01:19,311
Now I'm not talking
about opposites attracting
19
00:01:19,378 --> 00:01:20,879
or anything quite
as simple as that,
20
00:01:20,946 --> 00:01:24,216
I'm talking about full out
bizarre relationships.
21
00:01:24,283 --> 00:01:27,086
I'd like you to meet
our first couple.
22
00:01:27,152 --> 00:01:29,154
They met four years ago
when Chris arrested Mike
23
00:01:29,221 --> 00:01:32,124
for aggravated assault.
24
00:01:32,191 --> 00:01:34,960
Lex, check this out.
Bizarre relationships.
25
00:01:35,027 --> 00:01:38,030
Doesn't that hit
close to home?
26
00:01:38,097 --> 00:01:40,032
Will you shut up?
I'm trying to think.
27
00:01:40,099 --> 00:01:42,168
You know, that's all
you ever do anymore.
28
00:01:42,234 --> 00:01:45,971
I'm trying to figure out
ways to get ride of Superboy
29
00:01:46,038 --> 00:01:47,405
so we don't have to spend
the rest of our lives
30
00:01:47,472 --> 00:01:50,942
hiding like cockroaches.
31
00:01:51,009 --> 00:01:55,247
As long as we're together.
32
00:01:55,314 --> 00:01:59,584
Well, I guess it pays
to have a good lawyer
now, doesn't it?
33
00:01:59,651 --> 00:02:03,155
- [screaming]
- [clamoring]
34
00:02:18,603 --> 00:02:22,707
They met in a way
that was really...
there's no other word for it.
35
00:02:22,774 --> 00:02:24,176
Bizarre.
36
00:02:26,445 --> 00:02:28,881
[clamoring]
37
00:02:37,723 --> 00:02:40,993
- You called Bizarro?
- [screaming]
38
00:02:50,902 --> 00:02:54,706
No, no, no, please, no.
Please, Bizarro, don't!
39
00:02:54,773 --> 00:02:56,408
You say Bizarro?
40
00:02:56,474 --> 00:02:59,645
No, bizarre relationships.
That's what I said.
41
00:02:59,712 --> 00:03:01,380
That what I want.
42
00:03:01,447 --> 00:03:05,084
A relationship?
You want a relationship?
43
00:03:05,151 --> 00:03:07,653
Bizarro want someone
to love.
44
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,155
Lex, I know you told me
to shut up, but look
at this.
45
00:03:10,222 --> 00:03:12,958
What, that inane talk show...
46
00:03:13,025 --> 00:03:14,493
Nobody love Bizarro.
47
00:03:14,559 --> 00:03:17,796
Hold the phone.
That's Bizarro.
48
00:03:17,863 --> 00:03:21,833
Me only want someone
to love.
49
00:03:21,900 --> 00:03:25,971
Someone to love.
[laughing]
50
00:03:26,037 --> 00:03:28,274
This guy is beautiful.
51
00:03:28,340 --> 00:03:30,175
You must be joking.
Whoever falls for this guy
52
00:03:30,242 --> 00:03:32,078
would have to be
as ugly as he is.
53
00:03:36,281 --> 00:03:40,185
You know, darling,
you may not be as dumb
as you look.
54
00:03:40,251 --> 00:03:44,957
But hopefully, he is.
55
00:03:45,023 --> 00:03:47,259
[laughing]
56
00:04:35,207 --> 00:04:38,910
[man] Come in.
Come in!
57
00:04:38,977 --> 00:04:43,282
Those articles on...
Mr. Jackson.
58
00:04:43,349 --> 00:04:46,185
Mr. Jackson.
59
00:04:46,252 --> 00:04:48,020
My paycheck.
60
00:04:48,087 --> 00:04:49,855
I know it's here.
61
00:04:49,921 --> 00:04:53,892
Somewhere, probably have
$1,000 down here by now.
62
00:04:53,958 --> 00:04:55,994
Those articles
on the Bigfoot sighting,
63
00:04:56,061 --> 00:04:57,897
I distributed them.
64
00:04:57,963 --> 00:05:00,766
You've been an intern here
for what, two weeks?
65
00:05:00,832 --> 00:05:05,303
It's clear to me you have
mastered the fine art
of copying.
66
00:05:05,370 --> 00:05:08,974
Now the big question is
how are you at filing?
67
00:05:09,041 --> 00:05:10,875
OK, I guess,
but I was really hoping...
68
00:05:10,942 --> 00:05:13,812
Later for that.
Right now what
I need is for you
69
00:05:13,879 --> 00:05:18,117
to help me find a report
on cattle mutilations.
70
00:05:28,293 --> 00:05:30,428
This one?
71
00:05:30,495 --> 00:05:33,898
For God's sake,
how'd you find it?
72
00:05:33,965 --> 00:05:35,467
Archaeology's my minor.
73
00:05:35,534 --> 00:05:37,336
[telephone rings]
74
00:05:37,402 --> 00:05:40,005
[woman] Mr. Jackson,
your new intern is here.
75
00:05:40,072 --> 00:05:42,608
Kent, go get her,
bring her in here.
76
00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:44,276
New intern, sir?
77
00:05:44,343 --> 00:05:48,213
Is there something wrong
with the work I've been doing?
78
00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:50,882
Kent, would you look
at this stuff?
79
00:05:50,949 --> 00:05:54,687
There is enough work here
for a battalion of interns.
80
00:06:07,199 --> 00:06:10,335
Mr. Jackson.
81
00:06:10,402 --> 00:06:12,404
He's right in there.
Good luck.
82
00:06:12,471 --> 00:06:17,041
Thanks, but I won't need any.
Hey, Clark.
83
00:06:17,108 --> 00:06:18,543
Surprised to see me?
84
00:06:18,610 --> 00:06:20,178
Well, yeah,
but all of the places
to take your internship,
85
00:06:20,245 --> 00:06:21,313
why the Bureau?
86
00:06:21,380 --> 00:06:22,714
Because of what you do here.
87
00:06:22,781 --> 00:06:25,316
You mean filing,
copying, getting coffee.
88
00:06:25,383 --> 00:06:28,287
No way.
I'm not doing any of that.
89
00:06:28,354 --> 00:06:31,823
See, this place
has all the answers
90
00:06:31,890 --> 00:06:34,793
about UFOs,
psychic phenomenon,
monsters.
91
00:06:34,860 --> 00:06:36,862
- I really haven't...
- And maybe even Superboy.
92
00:06:36,928 --> 00:06:38,363
Superboy.
93
00:06:38,430 --> 00:06:40,632
Yeah, what could be more
extra normal than him?
94
00:06:40,699 --> 00:06:45,337
Wouldn't you like to know
more about it? I would.
95
00:06:46,705 --> 00:06:48,373
So would I.
96
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:52,043
[telephone rings]
97
00:06:52,110 --> 00:06:54,079
Hello. Bureau for Extra
Normal Matters.
98
00:06:54,146 --> 00:06:55,980
Ritter speaking.
99
00:06:56,047 --> 00:06:59,984
What?
You gotta be kidding.
100
00:07:00,051 --> 00:07:01,754
On the Judy Show?
101
00:07:03,622 --> 00:07:06,291
So if you're here for action
and adventure, forget it.
102
00:07:06,358 --> 00:07:09,327
You're an intern.
You're not an agent.
103
00:07:09,394 --> 00:07:13,298
You get coffee.
You cover reports
and you stay out of our hair.
104
00:07:13,365 --> 00:07:16,301
You know, the Bureau
has every high tech
gadget you could want,
105
00:07:16,368 --> 00:07:18,303
except a lousy
cable connection.
106
00:07:18,369 --> 00:07:21,473
If you'd open your eyes.
107
00:07:28,780 --> 00:07:32,417
Lang, this is Matt Ritter,
one of the Bureau's finest
field agents.
108
00:07:32,484 --> 00:07:33,685
We've already met.
109
00:07:33,752 --> 00:07:36,522
Dennis, you should see this.
110
00:07:36,588 --> 00:07:39,958
[grunting]
111
00:07:40,025 --> 00:07:43,562
Oh, my God.
112
00:07:43,629 --> 00:07:46,398
It's that thing they created
at Schuster University.
113
00:07:46,464 --> 00:07:48,433
An imperfect
copy of Superboy.
114
00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:51,937
The file said it left earth.
115
00:07:52,003 --> 00:07:53,472
Evidently, he's back.
116
00:07:59,978 --> 00:08:02,414
Bizarro need someone.
117
00:08:18,229 --> 00:08:20,466
Bizarro,
what are you doing here?
118
00:08:23,067 --> 00:08:27,038
Everyone has someone to love.
Everyone but Bizarro.
119
00:08:27,105 --> 00:08:29,374
Easy, Bizarro. Easy.
120
00:08:29,441 --> 00:08:31,476
Remember me?
I'm your friend.
121
00:08:31,542 --> 00:08:34,747
Bizarro has no friend.
122
00:08:39,017 --> 00:08:41,386
Somebody's gonna get hurt.
123
00:08:41,453 --> 00:08:43,122
Me hurt.
124
00:09:12,150 --> 00:09:15,120
You picked a heck of a time
to take a lunch break.
125
00:09:15,186 --> 00:09:17,856
The phones haven't
stopped ringing since
that Bizarro clown
126
00:09:17,923 --> 00:09:19,490
did his guest shot
on the Judy Show.
127
00:09:19,557 --> 00:09:20,993
Have there been sightings?
128
00:09:21,059 --> 00:09:24,896
No, but you got other things
to worry about, like the phones.
129
00:09:24,963 --> 00:09:28,466
I went to Schuster to pick up
the duplicator. It's not there.
130
00:09:28,533 --> 00:09:29,902
Stolen?
131
00:09:29,968 --> 00:09:33,872
Gotta be.
132
00:09:33,939 --> 00:09:36,274
Hold on.
Artie, stay with it.
133
00:09:36,341 --> 00:09:41,146
You, man the phones.
You got more important
things to do?
134
00:09:41,213 --> 00:09:43,849
No, I guess not.
135
00:10:41,206 --> 00:10:44,176
Well, that's 12 of them.
That oughta do it.
136
00:10:50,548 --> 00:10:52,450
I just don't get it, Lex.
Why bizarro pigeons?
137
00:10:52,517 --> 00:10:57,355
They're bizarro homing pigeons.
138
00:10:57,421 --> 00:11:00,125
I'll give you a hint.
139
00:11:00,191 --> 00:11:03,128
Birds of a feather...
140
00:11:03,195 --> 00:11:05,797
Flock together.
141
00:11:08,132 --> 00:11:09,901
Ahh.
142
00:11:09,968 --> 00:11:12,938
Lex, I think it worked.
143
00:11:14,439 --> 00:11:16,741
Bizarro!
144
00:11:16,808 --> 00:11:21,179
Well, I see you must
have caught up with one
of my winged messengers?
145
00:11:21,246 --> 00:11:24,749
Pretty birds make me sad.
146
00:11:24,816 --> 00:11:27,786
Other birds stay away
from them.
147
00:11:27,852 --> 00:11:32,590
Why you make birds,
to make Bizarro sad?
148
00:11:32,657 --> 00:11:37,396
No, no, no, no.
I made them so that
I could find you
149
00:11:37,462 --> 00:11:39,797
so that I could make
you happy.
150
00:11:39,864 --> 00:11:43,068
You make Bizarro happy?
151
00:11:43,134 --> 00:11:44,770
If you make me happy.
152
00:11:44,836 --> 00:11:47,405
How me make you happy?
153
00:11:47,472 --> 00:11:51,076
It's simple.
Kill Superboy.
154
00:11:57,883 --> 00:12:01,519
Why you want
me kill Superboy?
He do nothing to Bizarro.
155
00:12:01,586 --> 00:12:03,688
He do nothing to Bizarro?
156
00:12:03,755 --> 00:12:06,958
Have you looked
at yourself lately?
He made you look like that.
157
00:12:07,025 --> 00:12:09,694
- No.
- Yes, he was jealous.
158
00:12:09,761 --> 00:12:13,398
He knew that an exact replica
would be too much competition.
159
00:12:13,465 --> 00:12:14,900
So he made you look,
well...
160
00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:16,835
Ugly?
161
00:12:16,902 --> 00:12:19,838
It's a strong,
but if you think it fits.
162
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:24,642
Me ugly.
That why Bizarro am lonely.
163
00:12:24,709 --> 00:12:27,545
All the awards,
the testimonial dinners.
164
00:12:27,612 --> 00:12:30,115
He didn't wanna share
all that, and the women.
165
00:12:30,182 --> 00:12:32,417
He certainly didn't wanna
share the women.
166
00:12:32,483 --> 00:12:33,785
Superboy?
167
00:12:33,851 --> 00:12:35,253
You're as good as he is.
You're better.
168
00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:38,823
You're gifted.
You're unique.
169
00:12:38,890 --> 00:12:41,426
Most people have to work
at it,
170
00:12:41,493 --> 00:12:45,297
but Superboy had
everything handed
to him on a silver platter.
171
00:12:45,363 --> 00:12:48,166
Now you tell me
what's most important.
172
00:12:48,233 --> 00:12:50,902
Good looks or character?
173
00:12:50,969 --> 00:12:52,403
But how killing Superboy
174
00:12:52,470 --> 00:12:56,474
get me someone to love?
175
00:12:56,540 --> 00:12:58,076
As soon as he's dead,
176
00:12:58,142 --> 00:13:02,013
I'm going to make someone
just for you.
177
00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:06,551
See? You make me happy,
I make you happy.
178
00:13:06,618 --> 00:13:08,487
You make Bizarro happy?
179
00:13:08,553 --> 00:13:11,722
Yes, yes.
180
00:13:11,789 --> 00:13:14,760
Now there's just one
small problem.
181
00:13:14,826 --> 00:13:17,528
We're gonna have to generate
lots of energy.
182
00:13:17,595 --> 00:13:19,431
I mean, the machine
can handle birds
and flowers
183
00:13:19,497 --> 00:13:22,534
and things like that,
but in order to make
you a whole woman,
184
00:13:22,601 --> 00:13:26,037
we're talking
about a major energy
supply like,
185
00:13:26,104 --> 00:13:27,672
well, Kryptonite,
186
00:13:27,739 --> 00:13:29,874
which they house happen
to have an ample supply of
187
00:13:29,941 --> 00:13:32,744
at the Schiff Military
Research Institute.
188
00:13:32,811 --> 00:13:36,615
Now I want you to force
them to put it all
inside this lead box.
189
00:13:36,682 --> 00:13:39,718
See, that'll protect you
from the radiation.
190
00:13:41,419 --> 00:13:45,123
Me not need.
Kryptonite not hurt Bizarro.
191
00:13:45,190 --> 00:13:48,593
Kryptonite not hurt Bizarro?
192
00:13:48,660 --> 00:13:52,464
Wow, I'm loving
this guy more and more.
193
00:13:56,801 --> 00:14:00,672
Damnedest thing
I've ever seen.
194
00:14:00,738 --> 00:14:04,275
I don't suppose we could
broil it and make believe
we never saw it?
195
00:14:04,342 --> 00:14:06,178
[Lana] Mr. Jackson.
196
00:14:06,244 --> 00:14:08,046
We're busy.
We're busy.
197
00:14:08,113 --> 00:14:09,848
We thought this was
important, sir.
198
00:14:09,914 --> 00:14:13,151
We've been getting calls
about weird white birds
exploding in the sky.
199
00:14:21,026 --> 00:14:22,994
[explosion]
200
00:14:23,061 --> 00:14:25,197
[men and women shouting]
201
00:14:27,065 --> 00:14:28,566
Are you OK?
202
00:14:28,633 --> 00:14:30,535
Sure.
203
00:14:34,839 --> 00:14:37,909
That was pretty
incredible, Clark.
204
00:14:37,976 --> 00:14:39,410
I didn't know you
had it in you.
205
00:14:39,477 --> 00:14:42,680
I usually don't.
206
00:14:42,747 --> 00:14:45,851
There's got to be some
rational explanation
for those birds.
207
00:14:45,917 --> 00:14:49,487
There is.
They're bizarro duplicates
and they're unstable.
208
00:14:49,554 --> 00:14:51,089
You mean like old dynamite?
209
00:14:51,156 --> 00:14:54,125
Sometimes they blow up
right away and sometimes
it takes a while.
210
00:14:54,192 --> 00:14:56,060
- You can never tell.
- Unpredictable.
211
00:14:56,127 --> 00:14:57,795
- Like Bizarro.
- Why isn't he blown up?
212
00:14:57,862 --> 00:15:01,066
Superboy exposed him
to a piece of Bizarro
Kryptonite
213
00:15:01,132 --> 00:15:02,667
and it stabilized him.
214
00:15:02,733 --> 00:15:07,338
Then whoever's using the machine
must not know about that.
215
00:15:07,405 --> 00:15:08,907
Apparently not.
216
00:15:16,781 --> 00:15:19,684
[alarm blaring]
217
00:15:19,751 --> 00:15:22,687
- Clark, what is it?
- You OK, man?
218
00:15:22,754 --> 00:15:24,222
Yeah, I just need
a little air.
219
00:15:24,289 --> 00:15:28,025
The kid is right. Let him go
home, get some rest.
220
00:15:28,092 --> 00:15:31,896
As a matter of fact,
221
00:15:31,963 --> 00:15:34,166
take tomorrow off, Clark.
222
00:16:07,632 --> 00:16:10,068
[screams]
223
00:16:26,818 --> 00:16:30,588
Luthor am right.
You always try to beat me
224
00:16:30,655 --> 00:16:32,823
for being happy.
225
00:16:32,890 --> 00:16:34,326
Luthor.
226
00:16:34,392 --> 00:16:38,262
Go back to old jail
without Kryptonite.
227
00:16:38,329 --> 00:16:41,265
Luthor make wife for Bizarro.
228
00:16:41,332 --> 00:16:44,902
Bizarro, no.
He's trying to trick you.
229
00:16:44,969 --> 00:16:47,738
No. Luthor help Bizarro.
230
00:16:47,805 --> 00:16:51,942
And now me kill Luthor.
231
00:16:52,009 --> 00:16:54,012
[gasps]
232
00:17:02,253 --> 00:17:04,022
[grunts]
233
00:17:11,696 --> 00:17:15,032
Get Kryptonite like you asked.
234
00:17:15,099 --> 00:17:18,003
Superboy try to stop me.
235
00:17:18,069 --> 00:17:20,071
Him dead.
236
00:17:24,075 --> 00:17:27,278
Superboy is dead?
237
00:17:27,345 --> 00:17:30,381
Just like that?
238
00:17:30,448 --> 00:17:32,584
[laughs]
239
00:17:34,352 --> 00:17:36,987
I don't supposed you'd
be offended if I asked
to see the body.
240
00:17:37,054 --> 00:17:40,091
First, you make me
someone to love.
241
00:17:40,158 --> 00:17:43,894
OK, OK, OK, OK, OK.
242
00:17:43,961 --> 00:17:46,831
It's not hard to see
what's on your mind.
243
00:17:54,939 --> 00:17:58,376
I guess this is show time.
244
00:17:58,443 --> 00:18:03,248
Darla, hon,
can we see you for a sec?
245
00:18:26,137 --> 00:18:28,672
Lex, sweetie,
246
00:18:28,739 --> 00:18:30,942
this isn't gonna
hurt or anything, is it?
247
00:18:31,009 --> 00:18:35,746
Relax, babe.
You'll be fine.
248
00:18:35,813 --> 00:18:38,149
- [ machine beeps]
- I hope.
249
00:19:02,674 --> 00:19:06,110
It's OK, Lex. I'm OK.
250
00:19:06,177 --> 00:19:08,780
[laughs]
251
00:19:12,851 --> 00:19:16,154
Am she the one?
252
00:19:16,220 --> 00:19:19,089
Yes, Bizarro, she am.
253
00:19:19,156 --> 00:19:21,158
Allow me to introduce you
254
00:19:21,225 --> 00:19:25,997
to your blushing bride.
255
00:19:27,598 --> 00:19:31,869
[screams]
256
00:19:31,936 --> 00:19:35,440
No, no, no, my dear.
Let's not be shy.
257
00:19:35,506 --> 00:19:38,443
You'll make a charming
couple I'm sure.
258
00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:41,545
She hate me.
She loves you.
259
00:19:41,612 --> 00:19:43,748
No, no,
260
00:19:43,814 --> 00:19:47,519
she's just awestruck
by your rugged good looks.
261
00:19:47,585 --> 00:19:51,322
You lied, Bizarro.
You mock me.
262
00:19:51,388 --> 00:19:55,393
Mock? You?
263
00:19:55,459 --> 00:19:59,130
Bizarro, babe,
this chick is hot for you.
264
00:20:05,536 --> 00:20:07,538
I can't believe it.
She fell for you.
265
00:20:07,605 --> 00:20:11,041
We gotta get out
of here before...
266
00:20:11,108 --> 00:20:13,911
Oh, no, no, no.
No, don't, please.
267
00:20:13,978 --> 00:20:17,348
Wait. We can try again.
She was unstable.
268
00:20:17,415 --> 00:20:20,884
Hey, I can fix that, Bizarro,
babe, for old time's sake.
269
00:20:20,951 --> 00:20:22,453
Darla, he's gonna kill me.
270
00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:25,056
Lex, what do you want me
to do?
271
00:20:25,122 --> 00:20:27,625
[screams]
272
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:37,902
[screams]
273
00:20:52,650 --> 00:20:54,819
[music playing]
274
00:20:57,819 --> 00:21:01,819
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