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1
00:00:11,924 --> 00:00:13,796
It won't be long now.
2
00:00:13,839 --> 00:00:16,233
At least she's comfortable.
3
00:00:16,277 --> 00:00:19,062
There's definitely
worse ways to go.
Mm, amen.
4
00:00:20,803 --> 00:00:22,196
Dysentery was no party.
5
00:00:22,239 --> 00:00:24,372
Shh, I think
it is happening.
6
00:00:24,415 --> 00:00:26,722
Ah. I should sing something
to ease her transition.
7
00:00:26,765 --> 00:00:28,550
Or perhaps don't make
this all about you.
8
00:00:28,593 --> 00:00:32,641
♪ Amazing grace
9
00:00:32,684 --> 00:00:36,601
♪ How sweet the sound.
10
00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:42,738
Who are you?
11
00:00:42,781 --> 00:00:46,394
I am the ghost of
your great-great-grandmother,
12
00:00:46,437 --> 00:00:47,830
Hetty Woodstone.
13
00:00:47,873 --> 00:00:49,266
Hi, I'm Flower.
14
00:00:49,310 --> 00:00:50,920
I wandered over
to your property
15
00:00:50,963 --> 00:00:52,791
from a music festival
in the '60s,
16
00:00:52,835 --> 00:00:55,055
and then I tried
to befriend a bear.
17
00:00:55,098 --> 00:00:56,578
Drugs were involved.
18
00:00:56,621 --> 00:01:00,103
I am Thorfinn. Uh...
19
00:01:00,147 --> 00:01:01,800
I like herring...
20
00:01:01,844 --> 00:01:03,759
She doesn't need
the whole roster.
21
00:01:03,802 --> 00:01:05,543
We are ghosts.
22
00:01:05,587 --> 00:01:08,242
While most spirits
pass on to the afterlife,
23
00:01:08,285 --> 00:01:12,115
we are the unfortunate few
cursed to spend eternity...
24
00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:13,899
Oh, and she's gone.
25
00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:15,814
- Oh, good for her.
- So unfair.
26
00:01:15,858 --> 00:01:17,947
She goes up, we stay here.
27
00:01:17,990 --> 00:01:20,036
In Odin's name, why?
28
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:21,429
Yeah, it's a real drag.
29
00:01:21,472 --> 00:01:22,952
Now what's going
to happen to the house?
30
00:01:22,995 --> 00:01:25,128
This house was
my pride and joy.
31
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:26,999
Now it could get sold
to God knows who.
32
00:01:27,043 --> 00:01:28,958
Murderers. Perverts.
33
00:01:29,001 --> 00:01:30,655
Irishmen.
34
00:01:30,699 --> 00:01:32,962
Well, there's no use
milling about up here.
35
00:01:33,005 --> 00:01:34,398
Shall we go
mill about downstairs?
36
00:01:34,442 --> 00:01:35,965
- May as well.
- Yeah, sure.
37
00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:38,489
I just hope someone interesting
moves in, ya know?
38
00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:40,665
Like a ballplayer,
or an astronaut.
39
00:01:40,709 --> 00:01:42,972
Whose life are you guys
hoping to watch next?
40
00:01:43,015 --> 00:01:45,105
Oy. Oh, be quiet.
41
00:01:45,148 --> 00:01:46,541
Oh, my God, this is the house?
42
00:01:46,584 --> 00:01:48,238
Whoa, so-- so we just
43
00:01:48,282 --> 00:01:49,979
- own this now? What's the catch?
- No, no.
44
00:01:50,022 --> 00:01:52,329
There's no catch. As I explained
to your wife on the phone,
45
00:01:52,373 --> 00:01:54,375
her relative passed away
and left her this estate.
46
00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:56,246
Great-Aunt Sophie. I think
I met her when I was a kid,
47
00:01:56,290 --> 00:01:58,553
but I-I thought
she died years ago.
48
00:01:58,596 --> 00:02:00,294
No, no, she just passed.
But the good news is,
49
00:02:00,337 --> 00:02:01,556
you're her next of kin.
50
00:02:01,599 --> 00:02:03,035
Didn't she have a son?
51
00:02:03,079 --> 00:02:05,168
Well, more good news,
he actually did die years ago.
52
00:02:05,212 --> 00:02:07,649
- Oh, okay.
- Oh, yeah, that's not, um...
53
00:02:07,692 --> 00:02:09,738
How much do you think
we could sell this place for?
54
00:02:09,781 --> 00:02:11,218
Assuming we want to sell.
55
00:02:11,261 --> 00:02:13,829
Uh, yeah, we're not moving
into a 300-year-old house
56
00:02:13,872 --> 00:02:17,049
in the middle of nowhere,
because that would be--
57
00:02:17,093 --> 00:02:18,660
Right, Sam?
58
00:02:18,703 --> 00:02:20,662
Well, it's just
we don't know the facts yet.
59
00:02:20,705 --> 00:02:23,708
Obviously, yes, we're
- probably going to sell.
- Yeah.
60
00:02:23,752 --> 00:02:26,624
He thinks I'm a little
impulsive.
Ah, just a smidge.
61
00:02:26,668 --> 00:02:28,017
Well, there are
a limited number of buyers
62
00:02:28,060 --> 00:02:29,497
for a property this size, right?
63
00:02:29,540 --> 00:02:31,325
So, you have your bed
and breakfast operators...
64
00:02:32,761 --> 00:02:34,850
- Here we go.
- Aren't you sick of the city?
65
00:02:34,893 --> 00:02:37,331
No.
We work insane hours
to live in a shoebox
66
00:02:37,374 --> 00:02:38,506
that we can barely afford,
67
00:02:38,549 --> 00:02:40,334
and somebody's offering us
a mansion.
68
00:02:40,377 --> 00:02:42,901
Sam, we don't know the first
thing about running a B and B.
69
00:02:42,945 --> 00:02:44,729
You're a chef. That's, like,
half of the Bs right there.
70
00:02:44,773 --> 00:02:46,818
Plus, I can write freelance
articles from anywhere,
71
00:02:46,862 --> 00:02:48,777
so we have income while
we're getting up and running.
72
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:51,214
That is an annoyingly strong
argument, you have to admit it.
73
00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:53,869
Okay, let's do this.
74
00:02:53,912 --> 00:02:55,131
We haven't seen the place,
75
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,524
so we'll go up there
for the weekend,
76
00:02:56,567 --> 00:02:58,395
- and then we'll talk about it.
- Yes! Thank you.
77
00:02:58,439 --> 00:03:00,223
- It is a really nice place.
- It is.
78
00:03:00,267 --> 00:03:02,312
And it's ours, for free.
79
00:03:02,356 --> 00:03:04,401
There's gotta be something
wrong with it.
80
00:03:04,445 --> 00:03:06,229
Babe, it's so charming.
81
00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:09,667
What could possibly
be wrong with it?
82
00:03:16,935 --> 00:03:19,764
Okay, so,
it's the summer of '98.
83
00:03:19,808 --> 00:03:21,592
my Lehman Brothers boys and I,
we scooped a copter
84
00:03:21,636 --> 00:03:23,507
to beat the traffic
out to the Hamptons,
85
00:03:23,551 --> 00:03:24,769
'cause that's how we roll.
86
00:03:24,813 --> 00:03:26,597
Anyway, we're on a list
87
00:03:26,641 --> 00:03:28,338
for this very
exclusive shindig
88
00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:29,992
at Surf Lodge in Montauk.
89
00:03:30,035 --> 00:03:31,254
Tara Reid's birthday.
90
00:03:31,298 --> 00:03:33,343
'Nuff said. So... Yeah, but,
91
00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:34,605
who is Tara Reid?
92
00:03:34,649 --> 00:03:36,172
Seriously?
She was a movie star.
93
00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:37,391
Oh. Silent or talkies,
sweetheart?
94
00:03:37,434 --> 00:03:38,957
Uh, what is a movie again?
95
00:03:39,001 --> 00:03:41,438
It's the-- It's the play
that they project on a screen.
96
00:03:41,482 --> 00:03:42,787
We've been through this.
97
00:03:42,831 --> 00:03:44,789
When you say "project"...
98
00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:46,008
What is "play?"?
99
00:03:46,051 --> 00:03:48,140
God, I hate being
the most recently dead.
100
00:03:48,184 --> 00:03:50,882
Anyway, yada yada yada,
it was a great night. The end.
101
00:03:50,926 --> 00:03:52,362
Okay.
102
00:03:53,668 --> 00:03:54,843
Okay, well,
thank you, Trevor,
103
00:03:54,886 --> 00:03:57,193
for that talk of the day
on partying.
104
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:58,455
No, it was very
high-level partying.
105
00:03:58,499 --> 00:04:00,457
You don't get it,
so, you know, whatever.
106
00:04:00,501 --> 00:04:02,807
All right, well, tomorrow,
of course, is food club,
107
00:04:02,851 --> 00:04:05,984
when Thor will be explaining
the subtle differences
108
00:04:06,028 --> 00:04:07,334
between types of cod.
109
00:04:07,377 --> 00:04:08,639
It will be similar
to salmon lecture,
110
00:04:08,683 --> 00:04:12,034
- but more cod focused.
- Ooh.
111
00:04:12,077 --> 00:04:13,514
Oh! Oh!
It's one of those--
112
00:04:13,557 --> 00:04:15,298
how you say--
it's a ship on land.
113
00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:18,170
Landship! Landship!
114
00:04:18,214 --> 00:04:19,955
It's not a landship,
you nincompoop.
115
00:04:19,998 --> 00:04:21,261
That's a horseless carriage.
116
00:04:21,304 --> 00:04:23,001
Bro, check out that body.
117
00:04:23,045 --> 00:04:25,482
Slammin'.
118
00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:28,616
Indeed. He'd have made
a fine militiaman.
119
00:04:29,965 --> 00:04:31,314
Holy crap.
120
00:04:31,358 --> 00:04:34,056
Beats the hell out of our
fifth-floor walkup, huh?
121
00:04:34,099 --> 00:04:35,492
Okay, yeah,
it's impressive,
122
00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:37,189
but can you reach
the fridge from your bed?
123
00:04:37,233 --> 00:04:39,670
- I think not.
- This air is so clean.
124
00:04:39,714 --> 00:04:41,324
And that guy at the gas station
in town...
125
00:04:41,368 --> 00:04:42,499
- What was his name, Carl?
- Yeah.
126
00:04:42,543 --> 00:04:43,935
Yeah. He was folksy, right?
127
00:04:43,979 --> 00:04:45,676
I mean, he did call me
a woman for wearing
128
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:47,591
a video game shirt,
which doesn't make any sense,
129
00:04:47,635 --> 00:04:49,767
but, yeah, Carl had
a certain charm.
130
00:04:49,811 --> 00:04:51,291
They're coming in.
131
00:04:51,334 --> 00:04:53,510
- Let's go.
- Whoa!
132
00:04:53,554 --> 00:04:57,035
Ah, geez, not again.
133
00:04:57,079 --> 00:04:58,036
Wait!
134
00:04:58,080 --> 00:05:01,213
Wow.
135
00:05:01,257 --> 00:05:03,041
Okay, this is huge.
136
00:05:03,085 --> 00:05:05,609
And it's all ours.
137
00:05:05,653 --> 00:05:08,090
I got to admit, it would be nice
138
00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:09,570
to have a little bit of space.
139
00:05:09,613 --> 00:05:12,529
Exactly. New York is
full of people.
140
00:05:12,573 --> 00:05:16,141
We're never alone.
141
00:05:16,185 --> 00:05:17,534
This must be them.
142
00:05:17,578 --> 00:05:19,536
The new folks
that own the house.
143
00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:21,538
Can you believe this place
has been in my family
144
00:05:21,582 --> 00:05:23,105
for six generations?
145
00:05:23,148 --> 00:05:24,541
She's a relative
of yours, Hetty.
146
00:05:24,585 --> 00:05:26,891
Well, I should hope not,
with her exposed knees
147
00:05:26,935 --> 00:05:28,632
and that saucy hairdo.
148
00:05:28,676 --> 00:05:29,938
Wow.
At least it's
just the two of them.
149
00:05:29,981 --> 00:05:31,766
There's still plenty
of room for us.
150
00:05:31,809 --> 00:05:33,768
Yes. Yes.
Two people is manageable.
151
00:05:33,811 --> 00:05:35,291
Limited commotion.
152
00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:38,076
No old lady bedridden
while disease eats away at her,
153
00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:41,123
but we knew those good times
couldn't last forever.
154
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:43,517
You know, a young couple
could be really fun to watch.
155
00:05:43,560 --> 00:05:45,823
- Oh, hell yeah, they would.
- Okay, Trevor.
156
00:05:45,867 --> 00:05:49,261
Before I forget...
157
00:05:49,305 --> 00:05:50,480
What is that?
Whoa, whoa.
158
00:05:50,524 --> 00:05:51,873
- What are you doing?
- This is sage.
159
00:05:51,916 --> 00:05:54,092
- I'm cleansing the space.
Oh, come on.
160
00:05:54,136 --> 00:05:56,704
Babe, this is Old House 101.
161
00:05:56,747 --> 00:05:59,097
You light this stuff,
and it wards off evil spirits.
162
00:05:59,141 --> 00:06:00,142
What did she say?
163
00:06:00,185 --> 00:06:01,230
Does that work?
164
00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:03,232
Do you really
believe in that?
165
00:06:03,275 --> 00:06:04,755
Better safe than sorry.
166
00:06:04,799 --> 00:06:06,844
- It's actually delightful.
- Oh.
167
00:06:06,888 --> 00:06:08,759
- Yeah, it's divine.
- Oh, lemme hit that.
168
00:06:08,803 --> 00:06:10,544
I would enjoy a... Is that sage or is that her?
169
00:06:10,587 --> 00:06:12,807
- Reminds me of torched village.
- Okay, people, people.
170
00:06:12,850 --> 00:06:15,418
There is enough
spirit repellant for all of us.
171
00:06:15,462 --> 00:06:17,464
Jay, we have a library.
172
00:06:17,507 --> 00:06:20,336
This place is, like,
173
00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,425
- old school rich.
- I know.
174
00:06:22,469 --> 00:06:24,340
I did a little research.
175
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:26,037
Apparently, my ancestors
who lived here
176
00:06:26,081 --> 00:06:27,691
were actual robber barons.
177
00:06:27,735 --> 00:06:30,651
Like, cartoon evil,
slept-on-a-bed-of-gold types.
178
00:06:30,694 --> 00:06:33,436
I mean, we did that once.
179
00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,960
Okay, they actually
seem really nice.
180
00:06:36,004 --> 00:06:38,136
They remind me of
this couple I was married to
181
00:06:38,180 --> 00:06:39,442
when I was on the commune.
182
00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:41,139
And a little of this couple
I was married to
183
00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:42,445
when I was in the cult.
184
00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:45,056
Honestly, it's, like,
way more beat up
185
00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:46,144
than in any of the pictures.
186
00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:47,494
Excuse me?
187
00:06:47,537 --> 00:06:49,321
It could use a little TLC,
but we can fix it up.
188
00:06:49,365 --> 00:06:51,628
Boy, she is really "can do."
189
00:06:51,672 --> 00:06:53,456
I am rooting
for these kids.
190
00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:55,197
I cannot help it.
191
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:56,590
I'm telling you, babe,
192
00:06:56,633 --> 00:06:59,462
this place is going to make
an amazing hotel.
193
00:07:00,855 --> 00:07:02,160
What is "hotel"?
194
00:07:02,204 --> 00:07:03,858
I'll tell you what a hotel is.
195
00:07:03,901 --> 00:07:06,121
A hotel is
our worst nightmare.
196
00:07:06,164 --> 00:07:08,993
Every room in this house
filled with people
197
00:07:09,037 --> 00:07:11,648
coming and going.
198
00:07:11,692 --> 00:07:13,998
Sleeping in our beds...
199
00:07:14,042 --> 00:07:15,652
Libertines!
200
00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:18,089
And you don't even want
to know about the clutter,
201
00:07:18,133 --> 00:07:20,570
Thorfinn, my fastidious
Viking friend. Ooh!
202
00:07:23,530 --> 00:07:25,662
Why?! Why?!
203
00:07:25,706 --> 00:07:28,883
Trash can right there.
204
00:07:30,841 --> 00:07:32,016
No!
205
00:07:32,060 --> 00:07:34,192
I hate
getting walked through.
206
00:07:34,236 --> 00:07:36,107
It's probably the worst pain
I can think of.
207
00:07:36,151 --> 00:07:38,893
No, wait, arrow through
the neck. That beats it.
208
00:07:38,936 --> 00:07:41,243
Okay,
209
00:07:41,286 --> 00:07:42,505
kill them!
210
00:07:42,549 --> 00:07:43,941
Uh, we can't kill them.
211
00:07:43,985 --> 00:07:45,203
- Yeah, that's not nice.
No, I mean
212
00:07:45,247 --> 00:07:46,770
we don't have the ability.
213
00:07:46,814 --> 00:07:48,946
Can't pick up a gun,
can't put their feet in cement
214
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:51,688
and drop them off
a country bridge.
215
00:07:51,732 --> 00:07:54,909
I went with a bootlegger
for a spell. You hear things.
216
00:07:54,952 --> 00:07:56,650
Plus, even if we could
physically grapple them,
217
00:07:56,693 --> 00:07:58,913
that husband fellow
would overpower us.
218
00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,523
I mean,
have you seen his shoulders
219
00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:02,133
and that V-shaped back?
220
00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:08,575
In summary,
we must do something.
221
00:08:08,618 --> 00:08:11,403
Wait, what--
Why don't we just try...
222
00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:12,883
haunting?
223
00:08:12,927 --> 00:08:15,190
We scare them away.
We're ghosts!
224
00:08:15,233 --> 00:08:16,713
Ooh.
Whoa!
225
00:08:16,757 --> 00:08:18,149
Yeah!
It's a good plan, right?
226
00:08:18,193 --> 00:08:21,370
Oh, no, sorry, I was just
seeing some major trails.
227
00:08:21,413 --> 00:08:22,763
What are we talking about?
228
00:08:22,806 --> 00:08:24,895
This plan of Trevor's
fills me with discomfort.
229
00:08:24,939 --> 00:08:26,767
The line between
the living and ourselves
230
00:08:26,810 --> 00:08:28,246
is one we should respect.
231
00:08:28,290 --> 00:08:31,423
Who are we to--
232
00:08:31,467 --> 00:08:33,208
Found my jacket!
233
00:08:38,779 --> 00:08:41,825
All right, let's haunt
these bastards out of here.
234
00:08:49,398 --> 00:08:50,791
Hey, Boo-Boo.
235
00:08:50,834 --> 00:08:53,445
The water from
the tap was disgusting.
Oh.
236
00:08:53,489 --> 00:08:56,187
So, I went to the gas station
and I got us some coffee.
237
00:08:56,231 --> 00:08:58,233
- Aw, thank you.
- Yeah. Carl says hi,
238
00:08:58,276 --> 00:09:00,627
and he called me a snowflake
for wearing flip-flops.
239
00:09:00,670 --> 00:09:02,324
- Classic Carl.
- Yeah.
240
00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:06,197
Okay,
Canary Yellow or Lavender Mist?
241
00:09:06,241 --> 00:09:08,548
Oh, okay, we're
putting up paint. Nice.
242
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:11,420
Haven't decided if we're staying
but we're putting up paint.
243
00:09:11,463 --> 00:09:13,030
You know what?
I-I think we should just
244
00:09:13,074 --> 00:09:14,684
knock the whole wall down
while we're at it.
245
00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:16,468
Do you think it's load-bearing?
246
00:09:16,512 --> 00:09:18,993
What? What is this?
What are you doing?
247
00:09:19,036 --> 00:09:20,908
Do you even know what sound
you're listening for?
248
00:09:20,951 --> 00:09:23,388
Not sure, but it makes me feel
like Joanna Gaines,
249
00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:24,607
and I'm not mad at that.
250
00:09:24,651 --> 00:09:27,001
- Ooh.
- Wanna come be my Chip, big boy?
251
00:09:27,044 --> 00:09:28,655
Um, yes please.
252
00:09:28,698 --> 00:09:32,180
Wait a minute, why do we only
role-play couples from HGTV?
253
00:09:32,223 --> 00:09:35,183
Please don't kink shame me.
254
00:09:35,226 --> 00:09:37,489
Oh, it's adorable.
There's a bird in our room,
255
00:09:37,533 --> 00:09:39,187
because of course there is.
256
00:09:39,230 --> 00:09:42,059
Okay, you're right, this place
needs a little bit of work.
257
00:09:42,103 --> 00:09:44,714
- Here he comes!
- Hit the deck!
258
00:09:48,239 --> 00:09:51,286
Now, let's take inventory
of the skills at our disposal.
259
00:09:51,329 --> 00:09:53,505
Thor, as we all know,
is able to do that thing
260
00:09:53,549 --> 00:09:56,465
with the electrics because
he was struck by lightning.
261
00:10:02,689 --> 00:10:04,212
I am powerful.
262
00:10:04,255 --> 00:10:06,214
Oh, Isaac,
- what about your thing?
- Yes, yes, yes.
263
00:10:06,257 --> 00:10:08,477
Oh, yes, no, I don't know to
what it is you refer. Okay...
264
00:10:08,520 --> 00:10:10,087
You died of dysentery.
265
00:10:10,131 --> 00:10:11,959
Yeah, it smells like a fart when
the living walk through you.
266
00:10:12,002 --> 00:10:13,438
It's nasty.
267
00:10:13,482 --> 00:10:14,744
- You stink, you stink.
- It's not pleasant.
268
00:10:14,788 --> 00:10:16,703
Okay.
269
00:10:16,746 --> 00:10:18,661
I get it. We all get it.
270
00:10:18,705 --> 00:10:19,749
And trust me, you
don't need to be
271
00:10:19,793 --> 00:10:21,229
so harsh in your
condemnations.
272
00:10:21,272 --> 00:10:23,666
It is far worse for me
than it is for thee.
273
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:24,885
Okay, moving on. What else?
274
00:10:24,928 --> 00:10:26,451
Well, I was thinking
since Alberta
275
00:10:26,495 --> 00:10:29,585
was a singer in life
and can project her humming
276
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:30,717
into the world of the living,
277
00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,023
what if we had her hum the song
278
00:10:33,067 --> 00:10:34,895
from the movie Ghost
to scare them?
279
00:10:34,938 --> 00:10:36,505
Huh? Kinda
thematic, right?
280
00:10:36,548 --> 00:10:38,072
You know we don't
know what that is, Pete.
281
00:10:38,115 --> 00:10:39,726
Oh, right,
the movie thing.
282
00:10:39,769 --> 00:10:41,118
Welcome to my hell.
283
00:10:41,162 --> 00:10:42,293
You guys would
actually love it.
284
00:10:42,337 --> 00:10:43,904
There was this
amazing scene
285
00:10:43,947 --> 00:10:45,166
where the main girl
was making pottery...
286
00:10:45,209 --> 00:10:46,602
We don't have time for this.
287
00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:48,735
And then this hunky,
shirtless guy comes in...
288
00:10:48,778 --> 00:10:49,997
Well, we do have some time.
289
00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:51,346
The haunting isn't imminent.
Go on.
290
00:10:51,389 --> 00:10:53,609
It's fine. I get it.
I'll hum something scary.
291
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:56,743
Oh, Trevor has to
do his amazing thing.
292
00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:58,092
That must be
the topper.
293
00:10:58,135 --> 00:10:59,789
Yeah. Do it!
294
00:10:59,833 --> 00:11:02,009
You're very kind.
295
00:11:02,052 --> 00:11:04,141
Come on, Trev.
296
00:11:09,625 --> 00:11:11,801
Oh, sorry, hold on, it's just... You got it, you got it.
297
00:11:11,845 --> 00:11:13,324
Focus.
- Focus, focus.
- You got it.
298
00:11:25,162 --> 00:11:26,990
Yo, T-money did it!
Scary!
299
00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:29,253
Oh, it's good!
300
00:11:29,297 --> 00:11:31,299
Troops, I believe we are ready.
301
00:11:31,342 --> 00:11:34,781
Tonight, get your sleep,
for tomorrow we strike!
302
00:11:34,824 --> 00:11:36,304
Yes!
303
00:11:43,659 --> 00:11:45,313
The hot water's not working!
304
00:11:45,356 --> 00:11:47,489
Okay, people, he's coming out.
Man your posts.
305
00:11:47,532 --> 00:11:51,101
Good luck, everybody.
And have fun!
306
00:11:52,929 --> 00:11:54,801
The hot water's out again.
307
00:11:54,844 --> 00:11:56,019
One second!
308
00:11:56,063 --> 00:11:58,021
And... go, Thor!
309
00:11:59,544 --> 00:12:01,155
What the...
310
00:12:01,198 --> 00:12:02,722
Come on.
311
00:12:06,595 --> 00:12:07,727
Ah.
312
00:12:07,770 --> 00:12:09,163
Man down!
Alberta, you're up.
313
00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:10,686
Trevor, you're on deck.
314
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:12,470
You know, it kinda feels
like I'm opening for Trevor.
315
00:12:12,514 --> 00:12:14,864
Now, I don't need to headline
this haunting, but...
316
00:12:14,908 --> 00:12:17,606
- Not now!
- Ugh, okay. Fine.
317
00:12:21,784 --> 00:12:23,655
I got the stereo working.
318
00:12:23,699 --> 00:12:25,005
- Cool.
- Go on.
319
00:12:28,835 --> 00:12:31,620
Ugh, babe.
320
00:12:31,663 --> 00:12:33,013
Nice try, that was you.
321
00:12:33,056 --> 00:12:34,449
Are you on a juice cleanse?
322
00:12:34,492 --> 00:12:36,538
Close it out, Trevor.
You're our only hope.
323
00:12:36,581 --> 00:12:38,061
Okay, you can't blame
the other person
324
00:12:38,105 --> 00:12:39,671
when there's only
one other person.
325
00:12:39,715 --> 00:12:40,803
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
326
00:12:42,326 --> 00:12:44,241
You know I couldn't
produce that if I tried.
327
00:12:44,285 --> 00:12:45,677
Come on, man!
328
00:12:45,721 --> 00:12:46,853
Bring the fortitude.
329
00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:47,854
That is disgusting.
330
00:12:47,897 --> 00:12:49,943
Oh, come on, you gaslighter.
331
00:12:49,986 --> 00:12:52,815
You got a cute butt,
but it's got a foul mouth.
332
00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:58,168
Huh. Haunting is hard.
333
00:12:58,212 --> 00:12:59,561
Ooh, that is rank.
334
00:12:59,604 --> 00:13:01,389
Shut up.
All right.
335
00:13:03,086 --> 00:13:04,784
Babe? What are you doing?
336
00:13:04,827 --> 00:13:06,220
I'm gonna fix the water heater.
337
00:13:06,263 --> 00:13:08,178
It's probably
just the gas, right?
338
00:13:08,222 --> 00:13:10,224
This has got to be simple,
just turn the pilot on?
339
00:13:10,267 --> 00:13:12,356
This place is so creepy.
340
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,142
Much better.
341
00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:16,839
- Who are these guys?
- I don't know.
342
00:13:16,883 --> 00:13:18,754
Jay, that looks kinda ancient.
343
00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,800
Maybe we should
just call a professional.
344
00:13:20,843 --> 00:13:22,366
No, no.
we're not dumping
345
00:13:22,410 --> 00:13:24,151
a bunch of money
into this house.
346
00:13:24,194 --> 00:13:26,109
Plus, I want to
take a shower now.
347
00:13:26,153 --> 00:13:27,807
Counterclockwise.
348
00:13:27,850 --> 00:13:29,852
Okay, it's just I don't think
you know what you're doing.
349
00:13:30,897 --> 00:13:32,115
- Uh-oh.
- That's not good.
350
00:13:32,159 --> 00:13:33,508
- That should do it.
- That won't do it.
351
00:13:33,551 --> 00:13:35,162
- Think I got it.
- He didn't.
352
00:13:37,033 --> 00:13:38,687
At least they left the light on.
353
00:13:38,730 --> 00:13:40,994
Oh.
354
00:13:41,037 --> 00:13:41,995
Damn it.
355
00:13:43,997 --> 00:13:45,520
Trevor?
God.
356
00:13:45,563 --> 00:13:47,261
What-what are you doing?
The livings aren't even here.
357
00:13:47,304 --> 00:13:49,437
No, I know, I know.
This isn't for them.
358
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:51,700
This is between
T-Money and the vahse.
359
00:13:51,743 --> 00:13:53,354
It's personal.
360
00:13:53,397 --> 00:13:54,703
I've always said vayse.
361
00:13:54,746 --> 00:13:57,488
Can you please... Sorry.
362
00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:59,490
Aw!
363
00:14:01,971 --> 00:14:03,320
Still freezing.
364
00:14:03,364 --> 00:14:04,887
Okay, well, the good news is
365
00:14:04,931 --> 00:14:06,715
we're going back to New York
this afternoon anyway,
366
00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:08,412
so we can just fix it
when we come back.
367
00:14:08,456 --> 00:14:10,284
You mean if we come back.
368
00:14:10,327 --> 00:14:13,504
Okay, we're having
this conversation.
369
00:14:13,548 --> 00:14:16,246
Sam, um...
370
00:14:16,290 --> 00:14:18,161
I'm just gonna come out
and say it, okay?
371
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:22,644
Pardon?
372
00:14:22,687 --> 00:14:25,516
- I didn't hear you.
- I don't want to move here.
373
00:14:26,474 --> 00:14:27,997
Well, this just got interesting.
374
00:14:28,041 --> 00:14:29,433
Very interesting.
375
00:14:29,477 --> 00:14:32,828
Like finding new type
of cod interesting.
376
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,308
Come on.
377
00:14:34,351 --> 00:14:36,745
- Okay, a little too close.
- Sure. Okay.
378
00:14:39,791 --> 00:14:41,315
Oh, that was--
I was-- That was gonna be it.
379
00:14:41,358 --> 00:14:42,969
- That was gonna be it. Really.
- I know. I felt that.
380
00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:44,274
That was so
close.
381
00:14:44,318 --> 00:14:46,146
I came up here with
an open mind, for sure,
382
00:14:46,189 --> 00:14:48,061
but this whole bed
and breakfast idea...
383
00:14:48,104 --> 00:14:49,932
I mean, come on.
384
00:14:49,976 --> 00:14:51,499
Do we really want
to leave New York?
385
00:14:51,542 --> 00:14:53,283
Jay, I love you,
but you know that you
386
00:14:53,327 --> 00:14:54,676
- get a bit scared of change.
- Mm.
387
00:14:54,719 --> 00:14:57,635
But it's okay
to try something different.
388
00:14:57,679 --> 00:15:00,029
Yes, I agree and I'm willing to
try something different... Yes.
389
00:15:00,073 --> 00:15:01,465
below 14th Street.
390
00:15:01,509 --> 00:15:03,990
He's cute-- Funny!
391
00:15:04,033 --> 00:15:07,907
I don't know what it is but I-I
feel a connection to this place.
392
00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:10,344
I could see a future here,
us raising a family.
393
00:15:10,387 --> 00:15:11,649
I want all that, babe,
394
00:15:11,693 --> 00:15:14,174
but-but, we're in
way over our heads.
395
00:15:14,217 --> 00:15:15,697
This place is falling apart.
396
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:17,003
It is kind of a dump.
397
00:15:17,046 --> 00:15:18,047
Oh, shut up.
398
00:15:23,748 --> 00:15:25,011
We did it!
399
00:15:26,577 --> 00:15:29,015
So, that's it?
We just do what you want?
400
00:15:29,058 --> 00:15:31,582
If we're both gonna be making
some big crazy move... Mm-hmm.
401
00:15:31,626 --> 00:15:34,803
...then-then we should at least
- both be able to agree on it.
- Fine!
402
00:15:34,846 --> 00:15:36,109
But you know what, Jay?
403
00:15:36,152 --> 00:15:37,893
Sometimes you
gotta just do something
404
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:38,894
a little bold, ya know?
405
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:40,374
Put some Canary Yellow up
406
00:15:40,417 --> 00:15:42,550
and get out of your
neutral-palette mindset.
407
00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:44,073
What? What are you--
What was that?
408
00:15:44,117 --> 00:15:45,727
Neutrals go with everything.
409
00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:47,468
Haven't you learned anything
from Love It or List It?
410
00:15:47,511 --> 00:15:49,383
Well, I don't know what
any of those words mean,
411
00:15:49,426 --> 00:15:51,472
but I know that he won't
be laying with her
412
00:15:51,515 --> 00:15:54,344
for several moons!
413
00:15:54,388 --> 00:15:56,520
That was amazing.
You're incredible.
414
00:15:58,131 --> 00:16:00,220
Whoa, whoa, watch out!
415
00:16:09,229 --> 00:16:10,665
- Bro, that's not good.
Sam?
416
00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:12,884
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, Sam, hey!
417
00:16:12,928 --> 00:16:16,714
Sam. Sam! Oh, my God. Sam!
418
00:16:27,856 --> 00:16:28,813
Murderer.
419
00:16:28,857 --> 00:16:30,076
Okay, again,
420
00:16:30,119 --> 00:16:32,643
I didn't mean for her
to trip and fall.
421
00:16:32,687 --> 00:16:34,732
You have to believe me,
I would never intentionally
422
00:16:34,776 --> 00:16:36,038
hurt anyone that hot.
423
00:16:36,082 --> 00:16:39,824
Aw, husband guy looks so sad.
424
00:16:39,868 --> 00:16:43,611
I remember when I died.
Ira looked so scared.
425
00:16:43,654 --> 00:16:45,917
Because he didn't want
to lose me.
426
00:16:45,961 --> 00:16:48,746
And also because he was trying
to get away from the bear.
427
00:16:48,790 --> 00:16:50,705
Could you imagine
if she doesn't make it?
428
00:16:50,748 --> 00:16:53,403
What a terrible
last memory for him.
429
00:16:53,447 --> 00:16:55,275
Ending things in an argument.
430
00:16:55,318 --> 00:16:58,495
Carol and I argued
the last time we spoke.
431
00:16:58,539 --> 00:17:00,323
It's funny,
it felt like such a big deal
432
00:17:00,367 --> 00:17:02,499
at the time, and now I...
can't even tell you
433
00:17:02,543 --> 00:17:04,414
what it was
we were arguing about.
434
00:17:06,938 --> 00:17:08,810
You never think, when
you close that door behind you,
435
00:17:08,853 --> 00:17:11,247
that that'll be the last time
you walk through that door.
436
00:17:13,815 --> 00:17:16,557
But then I had my accident,
and I realized
437
00:17:16,600 --> 00:17:18,776
I'm never gonna
see my wife again.
438
00:17:23,129 --> 00:17:26,828
I'm never gonna get to
speak to her, to hold her,
439
00:17:26,871 --> 00:17:30,484
to tell her how much I love her.
440
00:17:30,527 --> 00:17:34,444
Oh, wait! I remember
what we were fighting about.
441
00:17:34,488 --> 00:17:36,316
She ate all the donut holes,
442
00:17:36,359 --> 00:17:37,882
and she doesn't even
like donut holes.
443
00:17:37,926 --> 00:17:40,407
It was just to spite me.
Which was just like her,
444
00:17:40,450 --> 00:17:42,235
that selfish so-and-so.
445
00:17:47,153 --> 00:17:49,242
Uh, the point is...
446
00:17:49,285 --> 00:17:52,245
life is precious.
447
00:17:52,288 --> 00:17:54,203
What is donut hole?
448
00:17:54,247 --> 00:17:56,684
It's just a round donut--
449
00:17:56,727 --> 00:17:58,773
It's what's miss--
It doesn't matter.
450
00:18:03,865 --> 00:18:06,781
It's a tough loss.
451
00:18:09,392 --> 00:18:10,872
What's wrong?
452
00:18:10,915 --> 00:18:13,527
The Knicks blew a ten-point
lead to the Nuggets. Damn it.
453
00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:15,006
Well, I hope you were
at least this upset
454
00:18:15,050 --> 00:18:17,008
when I was technically dead
for three minutes.
455
00:18:17,052 --> 00:18:18,923
Let's get you home.
456
00:18:18,967 --> 00:18:21,143
- Go slow.
- Okay.
457
00:18:21,187 --> 00:18:24,103
♪ Home awaiting
458
00:18:24,146 --> 00:18:25,669
♪ In the sky
459
00:18:25,713 --> 00:18:30,979
♪ Oh, in the sky.
460
00:18:31,022 --> 00:18:32,502
Thank you, Alberta.
461
00:18:32,546 --> 00:18:34,113
I don't know how many times
we've heard that song.
462
00:18:34,156 --> 00:18:37,116
- 487.
- But it gets better
every time.
463
00:18:37,159 --> 00:18:38,813
Landship! Landship!
464
00:18:38,856 --> 00:18:40,597
- The livings, man!
They're back.
465
00:18:40,641 --> 00:18:44,558
Oh, she's alive.
466
00:18:44,601 --> 00:18:46,168
Oh, thank God.
467
00:18:46,212 --> 00:18:48,431
Wait, is there any scarring?
How's the punim?
468
00:18:50,825 --> 00:18:52,957
I thought we were going home.
469
00:18:53,001 --> 00:18:54,698
Yeah, I just wanted to swing
by the house real quick
470
00:18:54,742 --> 00:18:56,091
and show you something.
471
00:18:56,135 --> 00:18:58,006
So, while you were sleeping
for two weeks...
472
00:18:58,049 --> 00:19:00,748
- Coma.
- Coma. I had a
contractor come in
473
00:19:00,791 --> 00:19:02,619
just to give us an estimate
on what needs to be done.
474
00:19:02,663 --> 00:19:04,273
And guess what.
It's way more
475
00:19:04,317 --> 00:19:05,753
than I could have
ever imagined.
476
00:19:05,796 --> 00:19:07,624
It's like a new foundation,
it's new floors...
477
00:19:07,668 --> 00:19:09,017
Jay, it's fine.
You know, I'm okay with
478
00:19:09,060 --> 00:19:10,323
selling the place.
479
00:19:10,366 --> 00:19:12,586
I had some time to think,
and you were right.
480
00:19:12,629 --> 00:19:14,457
I think the whole
bed and breakfast idea
481
00:19:14,501 --> 00:19:16,981
- was probably crazy.
- Well, then, call me crazy,
482
00:19:17,025 --> 00:19:18,069
'cause we're doing it.
483
00:19:20,028 --> 00:19:21,899
Hey, Mikey, how you doing?
484
00:19:21,943 --> 00:19:23,988
What's going on?
485
00:19:24,032 --> 00:19:25,076
That's the contractor.
486
00:19:25,120 --> 00:19:26,252
If we're gonna make
a go of this,
487
00:19:26,295 --> 00:19:27,731
we're gonna need some help.
488
00:19:27,775 --> 00:19:28,863
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
489
00:19:28,906 --> 00:19:30,125
We're staying?!
490
00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:32,083
We're doubling down, baby!
491
00:19:32,127 --> 00:19:34,825
I maxed out the credit cards,
I cashed in the IRA,
492
00:19:34,869 --> 00:19:36,914
despite the very vocal
objections of my father.
493
00:19:36,958 --> 00:19:38,655
we're deeply in debt.
494
00:19:38,699 --> 00:19:40,831
If this bed and breakfast fails,
we're really screwed.
495
00:19:40,875 --> 00:19:42,833
I don't understand.
What happened?
496
00:19:42,877 --> 00:19:45,662
Almost losing you made me
realize that I don't care
497
00:19:45,706 --> 00:19:49,231
where we live, because as
long as I'm with you,
498
00:19:49,275 --> 00:19:50,754
I'm home.
499
00:19:50,798 --> 00:19:54,018
Was it corny?
Did it sound corny?
500
00:19:54,062 --> 00:19:55,237
I'm not gonna lie,
I practiced it.
501
00:19:55,281 --> 00:19:57,283
It was so corny.
502
00:19:58,719 --> 00:19:59,981
Show me the house!
503
00:20:00,024 --> 00:20:01,330
Aw, they made up.
504
00:20:01,374 --> 00:20:03,898
I'm very glad Samantha is okay.
505
00:20:03,941 --> 00:20:05,508
Me, too. Wait.
506
00:20:05,552 --> 00:20:08,207
Who are these other people?
507
00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:10,948
It looks like
a construction crew.
508
00:20:12,254 --> 00:20:13,777
O'Malley.
509
00:20:13,821 --> 00:20:15,301
Electricians,
check the main panel.
510
00:20:15,344 --> 00:20:16,606
- Look out for loose wirings.
Got it.
511
00:20:16,650 --> 00:20:17,912
Roofers, be careful up there.
512
00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:19,261
Harness required,
and make sure you know
513
00:20:19,305 --> 00:20:21,132
where you're dropping the tiles.
514
00:20:21,176 --> 00:20:22,308
- On it!
515
00:20:22,351 --> 00:20:24,484
Oh, you're dressed
kind of nice
516
00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:26,050
for a construction worker.
517
00:20:26,094 --> 00:20:27,748
Hey. Hey, babe.
518
00:20:27,791 --> 00:20:29,489
Come with me,
there's one more thing
519
00:20:29,532 --> 00:20:30,881
- I want to show you.
Oh.
520
00:20:30,925 --> 00:20:32,231
Got a surprise.
521
00:20:32,274 --> 00:20:33,884
Come on. Hey, hey, easy.
522
00:20:33,928 --> 00:20:35,582
So that's it, then.
523
00:20:35,625 --> 00:20:38,280
They're going through with
this hotel situation.
524
00:20:38,324 --> 00:20:40,978
- We'll be overrun.
- The clutter!
525
00:20:41,022 --> 00:20:43,372
Okay, yes, the hotel
will be a nightmare,
526
00:20:43,416 --> 00:20:46,157
but gosh darn it,
I did miss those crazy kids.
527
00:20:46,201 --> 00:20:49,117
She talked to me! She
talked to me! She talked to me.
528
00:20:49,160 --> 00:20:51,206
And I think she kinda hit on me,
I'm not entirely sure,
529
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:52,294
but there was definitely
a spark.
530
00:20:52,338 --> 00:20:53,861
But she talked to me!
531
00:20:53,904 --> 00:20:55,297
Good God.
532
00:20:55,341 --> 00:20:57,734
Please, lower your hands.
533
00:20:57,778 --> 00:21:00,563
And... baa-dow.
534
00:21:00,607 --> 00:21:02,478
Uh-uh, what is that?
535
00:21:02,522 --> 00:21:04,480
That is the Canary Yellow
you wanted.
536
00:21:04,524 --> 00:21:06,917
- You painted the room.
- I know, I know.
537
00:21:06,961 --> 00:21:08,354
You know, I wasn't sure
about it at first,
538
00:21:08,397 --> 00:21:10,312
but it's growing on me.
539
00:21:11,008 --> 00:21:12,836
- What the hell?
- Yeah, yeah, you're right.
540
00:21:12,880 --> 00:21:14,925
It's a lot of yellow.
Oh, you know what we could do?
541
00:21:14,969 --> 00:21:17,319
We could put up
a muted accent wall.
542
00:21:17,363 --> 00:21:19,103
This can't be real.
543
00:21:19,147 --> 00:21:20,888
Okay, you're not loving it.
544
00:21:20,931 --> 00:21:22,368
It's no big deal.
It's just paint.
545
00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,065
Oh, my God.
546
00:21:24,108 --> 00:21:25,588
What are you looking at?
547
00:21:25,632 --> 00:21:28,374
I think you're right.
She can see us.
Uh-huh.
548
00:21:28,417 --> 00:21:29,636
Who are you?
549
00:21:29,679 --> 00:21:31,290
Uh, hi,
I'm Jay, I'm your husband.
550
00:21:31,333 --> 00:21:33,640
- Do you need to lie down?
- I can explain.
551
00:21:33,683 --> 00:21:36,207
We are ghosts,
those poor spirits
552
00:21:36,251 --> 00:21:38,819
who dwell on, compelled
for reasons unknown to...
553
00:21:46,043 --> 00:21:48,045
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