All language subtitles for Kaamelott.First.Installment.2021.1080p.BluRay.x264.AAC5.1-[YTS.MX]

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew Download
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian Download
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian Download
so Somali
es Spanish Download
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish Download
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese Download
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:00:32,334 --> 00:00:33,792 The kingdom of logres, 4 00:00:34,001 --> 00:00:36,417 stretching from caledonia to aquitaine, 5 00:00:36,626 --> 00:00:40,334 is ruled by the tyrannical Lancelot of the lake. 6 00:00:45,001 --> 00:00:48,084 For years, Lancelot has used Saxon mercenaries 7 00:00:48,292 --> 00:00:50,001 to hunt his sworn enemy, 8 00:00:50,209 --> 00:00:53,042 Arthur pendragon. 9 00:01:05,084 --> 00:01:07,501 They're surrendering! 10 00:01:12,626 --> 00:01:15,876 Get up! Prepare to board! 11 00:01:36,709 --> 00:01:39,959 The red sea, 484 12 00:01:45,376 --> 00:01:46,501 Thank you. 13 00:01:47,001 --> 00:01:48,334 Are you the captain? 14 00:01:52,126 --> 00:01:53,126 There. 15 00:01:53,292 --> 00:01:55,001 I know. 16 00:01:55,376 --> 00:01:58,251 It's harsh. Yes, it's really harsh. 17 00:01:58,459 --> 00:02:01,167 It's a pretty strong message, no denying it, 18 00:02:01,376 --> 00:02:05,876 but it reveals fierce determination, on the one hand, 19 00:02:06,084 --> 00:02:08,626 and, on the other, utter inflexibility. 20 00:02:08,834 --> 00:02:10,209 What's in the hold? 21 00:02:10,709 --> 00:02:11,709 Dates. 22 00:02:13,251 --> 00:02:15,042 I'll be honest with you. 23 00:02:15,251 --> 00:02:18,167 I'm not at all keen on maritime journeys. 24 00:02:18,376 --> 00:02:22,667 The mere idea that I've wasted eleven days at sea pursuing you 25 00:02:22,876 --> 00:02:23,876 for dates... 26 00:02:26,167 --> 00:02:27,751 Reload, please. 27 00:02:27,959 --> 00:02:30,834 Sad to say, I fear we must use it again. 28 00:02:31,042 --> 00:02:33,292 Go and see. Only dates. 29 00:02:37,917 --> 00:02:40,251 Dates, no doubt about it. 30 00:02:41,751 --> 00:02:43,917 I was told, "the plonkers..." 31 00:02:44,126 --> 00:02:46,001 That's what they called you. 32 00:02:46,459 --> 00:02:50,876 "The plonkers have put all their money in a magnificent necklace 33 00:02:51,084 --> 00:02:55,042 made by one of the finest jewellers in tapharon." 34 00:02:56,542 --> 00:02:57,709 Any bells ringing? 35 00:02:57,917 --> 00:03:00,084 A magnificent necklace? Tapharon? 36 00:03:05,542 --> 00:03:08,501 Mind you, I'd never hide a magnificent necklace 37 00:03:09,042 --> 00:03:10,834 in a barrel of dates. 38 00:03:17,751 --> 00:03:19,001 There. 39 00:03:20,834 --> 00:03:21,917 We're leaving. 40 00:03:26,501 --> 00:03:29,751 Kaame/ott, isle of britain 41 00:03:31,959 --> 00:03:33,542 headquarters 42 00:03:38,001 --> 00:03:39,834 that's all damn Greek to us! 43 00:03:40,042 --> 00:03:42,709 We've been telling you for ten years now, 44 00:03:42,917 --> 00:03:45,126 we don't speak Saxon. 45 00:03:45,334 --> 00:03:48,334 If we for kaamelott fight, 46 00:03:48,542 --> 00:03:50,459 we need money! 47 00:03:50,667 --> 00:03:53,084 No fighting, ninny! 48 00:03:53,292 --> 00:03:54,834 We're stony broke! 49 00:03:55,042 --> 00:03:56,959 Can't we pay an interpreter? 50 00:03:57,167 --> 00:03:58,292 Don't you start! 51 00:03:58,501 --> 00:04:02,042 Do I have to spell it out? We can't pay for anything at all! 52 00:04:03,001 --> 00:04:04,167 Shit! 53 00:04:14,001 --> 00:04:15,167 Horsa! 54 00:04:33,126 --> 00:04:36,959 Why serve kaamelott if we get nothing out of it? 55 00:04:37,417 --> 00:04:40,584 You serve the quest for the grail, my hearties. 56 00:04:40,792 --> 00:04:42,251 You'll gain prestige. 57 00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:44,667 Prestige? 58 00:04:47,459 --> 00:04:48,876 And they laugh! 59 00:04:49,084 --> 00:04:51,501 Prestige puts them in stitches. 60 00:04:51,709 --> 00:04:53,251 We don't seek the grail. 61 00:04:53,459 --> 00:04:55,709 We do dirty work. Taxes. Raids. 62 00:04:55,917 --> 00:04:56,917 Arrests. 63 00:04:56,959 --> 00:04:58,792 And this endless hunt 64 00:04:59,001 --> 00:05:00,876 for the knights of the round table. 65 00:05:01,084 --> 00:05:04,584 The hunt goes on until you find them all. 66 00:05:04,792 --> 00:05:06,584 So pay dough! 67 00:05:07,167 --> 00:05:10,834 You know, we saxons can be very accommodating. 68 00:05:11,501 --> 00:05:13,501 If there is no dough left, 69 00:05:13,917 --> 00:05:16,251 we'll gladly settle for... 70 00:05:18,334 --> 00:05:19,334 This! 71 00:05:22,417 --> 00:05:24,709 - What is it? - The isle of thanet? 72 00:05:25,376 --> 00:05:26,834 Thanet is yours. 73 00:05:27,042 --> 00:05:28,334 - Really? - What? 74 00:05:28,542 --> 00:05:29,542 I have to check. 75 00:05:29,667 --> 00:05:31,459 Check what? It's yours. 76 00:05:31,667 --> 00:05:33,459 You don't know you own it? 77 00:05:33,834 --> 00:05:35,417 Never heard of it. 78 00:05:35,626 --> 00:05:38,084 You can cede it then. You won't miss it. 79 00:05:38,292 --> 00:05:40,001 - No. - Cede it? Madness! 80 00:05:40,209 --> 00:05:41,959 Cede logres land to saxons? 81 00:05:42,167 --> 00:05:43,584 Your previous ruler 82 00:05:43,792 --> 00:05:45,792 would never have agreed. 83 00:05:46,834 --> 00:05:47,626 Yes, 84 00:05:47,834 --> 00:05:50,792 it would be simpler if we had the right to say 85 00:05:51,001 --> 00:05:52,417 king Arthur. 86 00:05:54,459 --> 00:05:57,334 My lord Lancelot! You were there? 87 00:06:05,042 --> 00:06:08,834 Don't rise to the bait. He's just provoking you. 88 00:06:12,709 --> 00:06:14,292 What are you doing? 89 00:06:14,501 --> 00:06:16,251 Don't carve up logres. 90 00:06:16,459 --> 00:06:17,917 It'll insult the gods. 91 00:06:18,334 --> 00:06:20,292 Sire, you can't do it. 92 00:06:21,834 --> 00:06:22,834 I can. 93 00:07:08,501 --> 00:07:09,917 Hey, alzagar. 94 00:07:10,334 --> 00:07:11,584 How's tricks? 95 00:07:11,792 --> 00:07:12,959 Venec. 96 00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:15,126 Venec the fennec! 97 00:07:16,709 --> 00:07:20,042 Working in merchant shipping now? 98 00:07:20,709 --> 00:07:23,792 I simply paid these dicks for my crossing. 99 00:07:24,001 --> 00:07:26,292 Barrel class must come cheap. 100 00:07:26,501 --> 00:07:28,292 He hid when he saw you! 101 00:07:28,501 --> 00:07:29,792 Thought I'd fight? 102 00:07:30,001 --> 00:07:31,959 - Screw you! - He hid 103 00:07:32,459 --> 00:07:34,084 as he has a price on his head. 104 00:07:34,542 --> 00:07:36,292 How much? 110? 120? 105 00:07:36,501 --> 00:07:38,209 Alive, 140. 106 00:07:39,376 --> 00:07:41,584 140 solidi! 107 00:07:42,959 --> 00:07:44,417 You buffoons! 108 00:07:44,626 --> 00:07:47,542 You look smart now with this junk worth 30! 109 00:07:48,959 --> 00:07:50,584 140 solidi 110 00:07:50,792 --> 00:07:54,459 for a schemer who runs dog fights at three coins a round? 111 00:07:55,334 --> 00:07:57,501 Because up north, in kaamelott, 112 00:07:57,709 --> 00:07:59,001 they have questions for him. 113 00:07:59,209 --> 00:08:01,251 Well, one question. 114 00:08:02,417 --> 00:08:03,417 Where is... 115 00:08:03,959 --> 00:08:06,542 Arthur pendragon? 116 00:08:12,042 --> 00:08:14,584 Leuke k ome, smugglers ' port 117 00:08:18,751 --> 00:08:20,251 isn't he wanted? 118 00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:23,376 Not now I've found him. Well? 119 00:08:24,376 --> 00:08:25,376 Well what? 120 00:08:25,417 --> 00:08:27,001 Do you remember or not? 121 00:08:28,584 --> 00:08:30,084 I sell 30 slaves a week. 122 00:08:30,667 --> 00:08:32,334 You expect me to remember one 123 00:08:32,542 --> 00:08:34,167 from how long ago? 124 00:08:34,376 --> 00:08:36,084 Eight or nine years now. 125 00:08:39,251 --> 00:08:41,834 I sold him to you and that's rare. 126 00:08:42,042 --> 00:08:44,751 He'd fled Rome. You said you'd sell him here. 127 00:08:44,959 --> 00:08:46,667 Short, pale as a buttock, 128 00:08:47,042 --> 00:08:48,376 with scarred wrists 129 00:08:48,584 --> 00:08:50,251 and a beard to his arse. 130 00:08:50,667 --> 00:08:52,626 - No? - I don't recall him. 131 00:08:54,501 --> 00:08:55,501 Who is he? 132 00:08:55,584 --> 00:08:58,001 - Nobody. A tramp. - Sure. 133 00:08:58,209 --> 00:09:01,042 You sail 17 days without rest for a tramp? You? 134 00:09:04,876 --> 00:09:05,876 City. 135 00:09:06,167 --> 00:09:08,167 Impetuous chequering... 136 00:09:08,376 --> 00:09:09,959 Where dost thou live 137 00:09:10,167 --> 00:09:11,167 daring architect? 138 00:09:11,251 --> 00:09:13,792 Where is he or do I slit your throat? 139 00:09:17,542 --> 00:09:19,876 If I don't recall, I don't recall. 140 00:09:20,084 --> 00:09:23,542 If I did recall, I'd tell you to piss off anyway. 141 00:09:24,001 --> 00:09:27,084 So now, take your clowns and set sail. 142 00:09:29,792 --> 00:09:32,584 Need a beating to get you started? 143 00:09:42,792 --> 00:09:44,417 Ok, bambinos! 144 00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:48,167 If I understood right, we can hit the jackpot. 145 00:09:49,251 --> 00:09:51,626 Pray to Mercury and bring clean briefs! 146 00:09:53,626 --> 00:09:54,917 We're moving out! 147 00:09:55,126 --> 00:09:56,834 - Moving out? - Where to? 148 00:09:57,042 --> 00:09:58,417 A seven-day walk. 149 00:09:58,792 --> 00:10:00,917 - How long? - A seven-day walk. 150 00:10:01,126 --> 00:10:02,126 Seven? 151 00:10:02,251 --> 00:10:04,376 What are we looking for seven days away? 152 00:10:07,376 --> 00:10:09,917 Not what, but who. 153 00:10:53,584 --> 00:10:55,292 Reeking curs, my feet are dead. 154 00:10:55,792 --> 00:10:58,292 I'm glad, my sandals held up well. 155 00:10:59,209 --> 00:11:00,792 Are they new sandals? 156 00:11:01,001 --> 00:11:02,876 No, my old ones, but I added... 157 00:11:03,084 --> 00:11:06,792 Sorry, lads, can we dial down the bullshit here? 158 00:11:07,709 --> 00:11:09,584 We talk cos you don't. 159 00:11:09,792 --> 00:11:11,417 Or only in riddles. 160 00:11:12,126 --> 00:11:13,751 Such as this, say. 161 00:11:14,292 --> 00:11:15,667 Isn't it a coin from logres? 162 00:11:16,417 --> 00:11:17,417 It is. 163 00:11:17,709 --> 00:11:20,251 So that is king Lancelot. 164 00:11:22,167 --> 00:11:24,584 That's the old king on the coin. 165 00:11:25,417 --> 00:11:26,417 The old one? 166 00:11:27,376 --> 00:11:30,667 A great king. A truly great king. 167 00:11:31,042 --> 00:11:32,334 As great as ataquf? 168 00:11:34,584 --> 00:11:38,334 What's that to do with us slogging along like donkeys? 169 00:11:39,584 --> 00:11:40,834 You want to know? 170 00:11:44,792 --> 00:11:45,917 Screw you. 171 00:12:02,001 --> 00:12:03,126 Damian! 172 00:12:06,042 --> 00:12:07,042 Damian! 173 00:12:07,626 --> 00:12:09,251 - Quarto? - Hi, guys. 174 00:12:09,959 --> 00:12:11,709 Ave, Damian. 175 00:12:11,917 --> 00:12:13,626 Still into nanny goats? 176 00:12:13,834 --> 00:12:15,459 I hear business is booming. 177 00:12:16,001 --> 00:12:17,209 If you're dealing, 178 00:12:17,626 --> 00:12:19,084 my crews are full. 179 00:12:19,292 --> 00:12:20,542 I don't need slaves. 180 00:12:20,751 --> 00:12:22,501 No, today is different. 181 00:12:23,001 --> 00:12:25,459 I'm not selling, I'm buying. 182 00:12:26,376 --> 00:12:27,459 Buying? 183 00:12:28,042 --> 00:12:31,459 Nine years ago, I sold you a scabby wretch. 184 00:12:34,251 --> 00:12:36,959 Scarred wrists, beard down to his bollocks. 185 00:12:40,334 --> 00:12:42,042 - A sort of tramp. - What? 186 00:12:42,251 --> 00:12:43,459 He was worth a bomb! 187 00:12:44,001 --> 00:12:45,001 Shut up, you. 188 00:12:49,001 --> 00:12:50,459 Why did we bother? 189 00:12:50,667 --> 00:12:52,334 Shut the hell up too! 190 00:12:52,709 --> 00:12:53,959 Dumb visigoths. 191 00:12:54,167 --> 00:12:55,667 No wonder we joke about you. 192 00:12:58,792 --> 00:13:00,959 I don't know who you mean. 193 00:13:01,167 --> 00:13:02,917 Take a minute to think. 194 00:13:03,417 --> 00:13:06,376 If you still have him, I'll take him. 195 00:13:06,792 --> 00:13:08,709 Amicably, for cash. 196 00:13:09,542 --> 00:13:12,584 Or less amicably, with your shit on fire. 197 00:13:21,876 --> 00:13:23,084 Get it off! 198 00:13:23,709 --> 00:13:24,709 Stop him! 199 00:13:24,792 --> 00:13:25,834 - Catch him! - Wait. 200 00:13:26,042 --> 00:13:27,042 Get it off me! 201 00:13:27,251 --> 00:13:30,042 I'll free him if I want. 202 00:13:30,251 --> 00:13:32,001 You don't know who he is! 203 00:13:33,126 --> 00:13:35,126 Dive in after him, idiot! 204 00:13:41,084 --> 00:13:43,626 - Can't he swim? - He's swimming. 205 00:13:45,417 --> 00:13:47,834 Follow the bank. Move yourself! 206 00:13:49,834 --> 00:13:51,167 Catch him on the... 207 00:13:51,792 --> 00:13:52,834 Got him? 208 00:14:01,042 --> 00:14:02,959 I cut my foot on the rocks. 209 00:14:03,167 --> 00:14:05,626 Look at this! It pierced my sandal! 210 00:14:57,417 --> 00:14:59,001 Good evening, sire. 211 00:15:04,334 --> 00:15:09,334 Fortress of came/iard, isle of britain 212 00:15:10,417 --> 00:15:12,542 talk about a surprise! 213 00:15:13,126 --> 00:15:15,042 It's been donkey's ages. 214 00:15:15,251 --> 00:15:16,501 Since last time, 215 00:15:16,709 --> 00:15:18,126 the place has changed. 216 00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:20,167 Not really. What's different? 217 00:15:20,376 --> 00:15:22,251 There wasn't a castle before. 218 00:15:24,876 --> 00:15:26,501 Yes, maybe. 219 00:15:28,209 --> 00:15:29,209 I'm just saying 220 00:15:29,417 --> 00:15:30,834 your visits are rare. 221 00:15:31,334 --> 00:15:33,209 But we're not complaining. 222 00:15:33,417 --> 00:15:36,959 Visits here must be spaced out like strawberry plants. 223 00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:38,751 Enough chit-chat. 224 00:15:38,959 --> 00:15:41,126 Let's not get maudlin. 225 00:15:41,334 --> 00:15:42,959 What brings you here? 226 00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:46,834 Please fetch me water and summon everyone. 227 00:15:47,042 --> 00:15:49,251 I have something to show you. 228 00:15:55,251 --> 00:15:57,376 - Got a minute? - No way. 229 00:15:57,584 --> 00:15:58,667 Slugs to squash 230 00:15:58,876 --> 00:16:00,834 and bindweed to hoe! 231 00:16:01,042 --> 00:16:02,834 You hoe bindweed now? Good. 232 00:16:03,042 --> 00:16:07,501 - I usually do it alone. - So I'm not the only hoer. 233 00:16:07,709 --> 00:16:08,709 The only hoer? 234 00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:10,334 You hoe at night? Unseen? 235 00:16:10,542 --> 00:16:12,251 Forget the bloody Greens 236 00:16:12,459 --> 00:16:13,459 and come in! 237 00:16:13,542 --> 00:16:15,667 - Your sister's here! - My sister? 238 00:16:16,251 --> 00:16:17,584 You have a sister? 239 00:16:19,209 --> 00:16:20,584 I told you. 240 00:16:21,042 --> 00:16:23,751 You bore people. So they keep quiet. 241 00:16:24,292 --> 00:16:25,292 I have a sister. 242 00:16:25,376 --> 00:16:28,376 Like other stuff I see no need to tell you. 243 00:16:28,584 --> 00:16:30,292 Stop being surprised. 244 00:16:30,501 --> 00:16:32,542 Get in here! 245 00:16:34,251 --> 00:16:35,251 Your hubby... 246 00:16:35,709 --> 00:16:38,042 - Does he miss war? - No chance. 247 00:16:38,584 --> 00:16:40,042 He's no Hannibal. 248 00:16:40,501 --> 00:16:43,209 He's what they call a "moderate". 249 00:16:43,417 --> 00:16:44,626 Demilitarization 250 00:16:44,834 --> 00:16:48,209 was almost what he needed to realize himself. 251 00:16:48,417 --> 00:16:51,084 What he needs to realize himself are tits. 252 00:16:52,251 --> 00:16:53,251 He hates war. 253 00:16:53,292 --> 00:16:54,292 That's what I said. 254 00:16:54,334 --> 00:16:56,334 Do you goons like war? 255 00:16:56,709 --> 00:16:59,209 Are you rabid killers with your celery bed 256 00:16:59,417 --> 00:17:00,876 and peasant garb? 257 00:17:02,042 --> 00:17:03,459 What peasant garb? 258 00:17:03,667 --> 00:17:05,042 Heard of resistance? 259 00:17:05,501 --> 00:17:07,209 Before weeding, 260 00:17:07,417 --> 00:17:08,417 you considered it. 261 00:17:08,626 --> 00:17:10,959 Resist that maniac Lancelot... 262 00:17:11,167 --> 00:17:12,459 Even without a coup, 263 00:17:13,001 --> 00:17:16,167 we could do less weeding and more scheming. 264 00:17:19,084 --> 00:17:20,084 What's that? 265 00:17:20,209 --> 00:17:23,334 A basin my father-in-law uses for foot baths. 266 00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:25,334 Nothing else works. 267 00:17:26,209 --> 00:17:28,042 Nothing else works for what? 268 00:17:28,251 --> 00:17:29,251 Hydromancy. 269 00:17:29,667 --> 00:17:30,459 Hydro what? 270 00:17:30,667 --> 00:17:32,709 Mancy. Divination by water. 271 00:17:39,001 --> 00:17:40,042 There. 272 00:17:47,792 --> 00:17:48,792 What is it? 273 00:17:49,292 --> 00:17:51,417 - Something's there. - Shit? 274 00:17:51,959 --> 00:17:54,292 - Marks. - Marks of shit. 275 00:17:54,501 --> 00:17:56,167 Tell us what you see. 276 00:17:57,209 --> 00:18:00,292 Pendragon's son on his way to britain. 277 00:18:00,709 --> 00:18:01,709 That's what. 278 00:18:04,584 --> 00:18:06,167 Coming from the south. 279 00:18:09,417 --> 00:18:12,084 Frankly, seeing pendragon's son coming 280 00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,292 from the south 281 00:18:13,417 --> 00:18:15,001 needs sharp eyes! 282 00:18:17,292 --> 00:18:18,501 Believe what you will. 283 00:18:18,709 --> 00:18:19,501 You bet. 284 00:18:19,709 --> 00:18:21,834 His return is announced three times a year. 285 00:18:22,042 --> 00:18:24,167 - Like hail. - Ten years since he left. 286 00:18:24,376 --> 00:18:25,959 The guy's snuffed it. 287 00:18:26,167 --> 00:18:28,626 Even if he came back, what then? 288 00:18:29,001 --> 00:18:30,667 He'd organize the resistance. 289 00:18:30,876 --> 00:18:33,542 So logistics is our problem? 290 00:18:34,084 --> 00:18:35,084 We've no weapons! 291 00:18:35,417 --> 00:18:36,709 Not even a spud-peeler! 292 00:18:36,917 --> 00:18:39,876 Mangonels, trebuchets, scorpions, onagers... 293 00:18:40,084 --> 00:18:41,876 Tuned by byzantine engineers 294 00:18:42,084 --> 00:18:43,667 from thessaloniki. 295 00:18:43,876 --> 00:18:45,667 My arsenal whisked off 296 00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:47,251 to kaamelott! 297 00:18:47,459 --> 00:18:49,584 Not one slingshot left. 298 00:18:49,792 --> 00:18:51,334 Pendragon's son is back? 299 00:18:51,751 --> 00:18:52,959 Let him come. 300 00:18:53,376 --> 00:18:56,001 He can hoe to make the trip worth it. 301 00:18:58,792 --> 00:19:00,042 You can clear off 302 00:19:00,251 --> 00:19:02,167 if dad-in-law wants a foot bath 303 00:19:02,376 --> 00:19:03,626 and needs his basin. 304 00:19:20,001 --> 00:19:23,167 Hispano-a quitaine border 305 00:19:23,959 --> 00:19:26,084 you really won't utter a word? 306 00:19:26,292 --> 00:19:28,042 I've pushed you for weeks. 307 00:19:28,876 --> 00:19:30,042 No reaction. 308 00:19:30,251 --> 00:19:31,459 No interaction. 309 00:19:31,667 --> 00:19:33,334 Except at the pass. 310 00:19:33,542 --> 00:19:36,042 I said it was cold, you threw your soup at me. 311 00:19:36,251 --> 00:19:37,751 Venec, shut up. 312 00:19:37,959 --> 00:19:39,459 I'm not being loud. 313 00:19:39,667 --> 00:19:40,667 Just be quiet. 314 00:19:49,376 --> 00:19:51,626 - Halt. - Hola, guard! 315 00:19:51,834 --> 00:19:55,001 - What's in there? - Prisoners I'm taking to vannes. 316 00:19:55,376 --> 00:19:56,792 - We're in order. - No! 317 00:19:57,001 --> 00:19:58,001 Not at all. 318 00:19:58,167 --> 00:20:00,251 He's taking slaves to logres. 319 00:20:00,459 --> 00:20:02,001 We're stolen goods. 320 00:20:02,209 --> 00:20:03,376 Ignore him. 321 00:20:03,584 --> 00:20:05,126 Noisy, but not mean. 322 00:20:05,334 --> 00:20:06,334 Who said that? 323 00:20:06,376 --> 00:20:08,709 I belong to master Damian sasnian. 324 00:20:08,917 --> 00:20:10,584 I was kidnapped! 325 00:20:10,792 --> 00:20:12,501 Don't let smuggled goods in. 326 00:20:12,709 --> 00:20:14,542 Aquitaine breaking laws? 327 00:20:14,751 --> 00:20:15,542 That's new! 328 00:20:15,751 --> 00:20:16,959 Arrest us, guard! 329 00:20:17,167 --> 00:20:18,959 Arrest us! Arrest us! 330 00:20:23,667 --> 00:20:25,542 Sorry for all this racket. 331 00:20:25,751 --> 00:20:28,417 Trust me and let us through. 332 00:20:29,042 --> 00:20:31,001 I'll take my prisoners 333 00:20:31,209 --> 00:20:32,876 to the fortress in vannes 334 00:20:33,084 --> 00:20:36,126 and you'll never hear another peep from us! 335 00:20:36,334 --> 00:20:37,774 The duchess of aquitaine is a whore! 336 00:20:40,834 --> 00:20:42,626 That'll get us arrested. 337 00:20:42,834 --> 00:20:43,834 Whore 338 00:20:44,126 --> 00:20:45,834 in the nicest way. 339 00:20:46,376 --> 00:20:47,792 Arrest these morons. 340 00:20:48,001 --> 00:20:51,042 They just want to provoke you. 341 00:20:51,251 --> 00:20:53,917 Ok, but I'm a sucker for provocation. 342 00:20:54,126 --> 00:20:55,376 Uncage the slave 343 00:20:55,584 --> 00:20:57,251 and line up. 344 00:20:57,459 --> 00:20:59,459 Take them to the Duke of aquitaine. 345 00:21:00,042 --> 00:21:00,834 Not bad. 346 00:21:01,042 --> 00:21:02,959 After insulting the duchess, 347 00:21:03,542 --> 00:21:05,376 they'll get a fine welcome. 348 00:21:05,584 --> 00:21:06,834 Hi, guys! 349 00:21:07,042 --> 00:21:08,167 Hi, guys? 350 00:21:08,709 --> 00:21:09,501 I was insulted. 351 00:21:09,709 --> 00:21:10,709 It's ok. 352 00:21:11,209 --> 00:21:13,209 What did you call her? A minx? 353 00:21:13,417 --> 00:21:14,209 A whore. 354 00:21:14,417 --> 00:21:15,626 Yes, well... 355 00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:17,334 I know you! 356 00:21:17,542 --> 00:21:18,542 Incredible. 357 00:21:18,584 --> 00:21:21,417 - I sold you Indians for a party. - Kashmir dream. 358 00:21:22,751 --> 00:21:24,209 A big hit. 359 00:21:24,417 --> 00:21:25,417 And you... 360 00:21:25,501 --> 00:21:29,292 Duke, I know that this person is your former sovereign 361 00:21:29,501 --> 00:21:30,959 but, if! May, 362 00:21:31,167 --> 00:21:33,542 he's my prisoner now. 363 00:21:33,751 --> 00:21:35,417 Yes, so I heard. 364 00:21:36,126 --> 00:21:38,126 - Your price? - What? 365 00:21:38,334 --> 00:21:39,792 As a bounty hunter, 366 00:21:40,001 --> 00:21:41,792 you expect money. 367 00:21:42,001 --> 00:21:44,084 Well, if this wastrel 368 00:21:44,292 --> 00:21:47,334 is worth 140 solidi, 369 00:21:47,542 --> 00:21:50,084 for this one, quite frankly, 370 00:21:50,292 --> 00:21:53,584 kaamelott won't pay less than... 371 00:21:54,501 --> 00:21:55,751 A thousand. 372 00:22:00,542 --> 00:22:01,542 In that case... 373 00:22:02,167 --> 00:22:03,167 I'll pay... 374 00:22:03,542 --> 00:22:04,542 Twice that. 375 00:22:04,584 --> 00:22:05,917 Twice that? 376 00:22:06,542 --> 00:22:07,542 You're mad. 377 00:22:07,751 --> 00:22:08,751 Don't worry. 378 00:22:08,876 --> 00:22:10,542 Half our fortune, moron! 379 00:22:10,751 --> 00:22:12,417 Pay this clown 2,000? 380 00:22:12,834 --> 00:22:14,209 In memory of the old days. 381 00:22:14,792 --> 00:22:15,834 At that price... 382 00:22:16,042 --> 00:22:17,334 There, it's a deal! 383 00:22:17,542 --> 00:22:18,751 Excellent. 384 00:22:18,959 --> 00:22:22,292 He'll pay 2,000 for the most wanted guy 385 00:22:22,501 --> 00:22:23,501 in the realm? 386 00:22:23,626 --> 00:22:25,667 Most wanted guys aren't cheap! 387 00:22:25,876 --> 00:22:26,876 There. 388 00:22:27,334 --> 00:22:30,167 How will Lancelot react to you nabbing Arthur? 389 00:22:30,376 --> 00:22:32,334 Lancelot... he's far away. 390 00:22:32,542 --> 00:22:33,542 He's the king. 391 00:22:34,001 --> 00:22:35,001 He isn't. 392 00:22:35,084 --> 00:22:38,417 Not until he pulls the sword from the stone. 393 00:22:38,626 --> 00:22:39,792 And that... 394 00:22:40,001 --> 00:22:42,084 That's not likely to happen. 395 00:22:42,834 --> 00:22:44,251 It'll take a while. 396 00:22:47,584 --> 00:22:50,251 Sorry, it's our beauty and well-being day, 397 00:22:50,459 --> 00:22:51,709 with a fruit detox. 398 00:22:51,917 --> 00:22:53,584 We weren't expecting you. 399 00:22:53,792 --> 00:22:55,876 We thought you were dead. 400 00:22:56,084 --> 00:22:57,459 Yes, well... 401 00:22:57,667 --> 00:22:59,417 That really upset me. 402 00:22:59,626 --> 00:23:02,001 The missus is less... 403 00:23:02,209 --> 00:23:03,209 Watch it. 404 00:23:03,334 --> 00:23:04,334 What? 405 00:23:04,501 --> 00:23:05,792 Watch what you say. 406 00:23:06,292 --> 00:23:07,292 You're back 407 00:23:07,501 --> 00:23:09,042 and that's good news, 408 00:23:09,251 --> 00:23:11,126 especially for the britons 409 00:23:11,334 --> 00:23:12,334 who are gasping. 410 00:23:13,959 --> 00:23:14,959 Meaning? 411 00:23:15,126 --> 00:23:16,584 It's an image. 412 00:23:17,126 --> 00:23:18,126 They aren't 413 00:23:18,209 --> 00:23:19,584 literally gasping. 414 00:23:22,167 --> 00:23:23,292 They're drained. 415 00:23:25,209 --> 00:23:26,292 Same thing... 416 00:23:26,501 --> 00:23:27,542 A vampire 417 00:23:28,542 --> 00:23:30,459 didn't drain them 418 00:23:30,667 --> 00:23:32,417 of their blood... 419 00:23:32,626 --> 00:23:35,501 What do you mean exactly by "you're back"? 420 00:23:36,126 --> 00:23:37,834 You could be king again. 421 00:23:38,792 --> 00:23:39,792 What? 422 00:23:41,542 --> 00:23:43,417 Sorry, it crossed all our minds. 423 00:23:44,334 --> 00:23:45,334 No kidding. 424 00:23:45,376 --> 00:23:47,292 You suddenly pop up again 425 00:23:47,501 --> 00:23:50,751 with logres oppressed by a tyrannical maniac. 426 00:23:50,959 --> 00:23:53,042 So, yes, it's a good idea. 427 00:23:53,251 --> 00:23:55,042 It's up to you. 428 00:23:55,626 --> 00:23:57,584 No one will force you. 429 00:23:58,209 --> 00:23:59,209 A good job too. 430 00:23:59,417 --> 00:24:04,042 I'd go to Egypt in that jerk's cage rather than return to britain. 431 00:24:04,251 --> 00:24:05,251 I'm the jerk? 432 00:24:05,292 --> 00:24:07,334 I have to push the jerk's cage. 433 00:24:07,542 --> 00:24:08,626 You can rest in it now. 434 00:24:08,834 --> 00:24:10,792 So I have to push it? 435 00:24:11,001 --> 00:24:13,042 If you're not back, then what? 436 00:24:13,251 --> 00:24:14,626 You'll stay here? 437 00:24:17,126 --> 00:24:18,959 Please find me clean gear. 438 00:24:24,292 --> 00:24:25,376 Then again, 439 00:24:25,584 --> 00:24:26,917 if I get my 2,000... 440 00:24:28,709 --> 00:24:31,542 I can offer these as clean clothes. 441 00:24:32,126 --> 00:24:34,209 Elegant, sophisticated, comfy. 442 00:24:35,126 --> 00:24:39,376 I have this one in Doe-belly beige and wear it all the time. 443 00:24:39,584 --> 00:24:42,751 Duke, every bounty hunter around is on my back. 444 00:24:42,959 --> 00:24:44,251 That's a bit showy. 445 00:24:44,459 --> 00:24:45,792 Everything I have 446 00:24:46,001 --> 00:24:47,626 is a bit like this. 447 00:24:47,834 --> 00:24:49,876 - And that? - That? Go. 448 00:24:50,084 --> 00:24:51,834 No, that's decoration. 449 00:24:52,042 --> 00:24:53,834 They say it was your father's. 450 00:24:54,042 --> 00:24:55,667 So I added a bear. 451 00:24:55,876 --> 00:24:57,042 An installation. 452 00:24:57,584 --> 00:24:59,167 - Artistic. - My father's? 453 00:24:59,376 --> 00:25:01,626 I contact the resistance fighters? 454 00:25:01,834 --> 00:25:03,042 What fighters? 455 00:25:03,251 --> 00:25:04,417 For his tea party. 456 00:25:04,626 --> 00:25:07,209 I thought it might be interesting 457 00:25:07,417 --> 00:25:09,751 to meet fellows with the resistance. 458 00:25:09,959 --> 00:25:11,542 Something informal. 459 00:25:11,751 --> 00:25:12,751 Unbelievable! 460 00:25:12,876 --> 00:25:15,167 I don't give a damn. Got that? 461 00:25:15,376 --> 00:25:17,667 Screw the resistance. 462 00:25:26,792 --> 00:25:28,459 Screw the resistance, 463 00:25:28,667 --> 00:25:30,001 logres and Lancelot. 464 00:25:30,209 --> 00:25:31,376 Screw the lot. 465 00:25:31,584 --> 00:25:32,667 I'm splitting. 466 00:25:43,334 --> 00:25:45,167 I spent 2,000 solidi 467 00:25:45,376 --> 00:25:47,376 to save you from execution in kaamelott. 468 00:25:47,584 --> 00:25:50,167 Be more gracious when I suggest tea. 469 00:25:50,376 --> 00:25:52,084 I'll pay you back. 470 00:25:52,292 --> 00:25:54,292 But tea is out. 471 00:25:54,501 --> 00:25:57,667 Moreover, my wife was called a minx. 472 00:25:57,876 --> 00:25:58,876 A whore. 473 00:25:58,959 --> 00:26:01,167 I leave at dawn for the east. 474 00:26:01,376 --> 00:26:02,626 Find me a guide. 475 00:26:02,834 --> 00:26:04,042 So I cancel? 476 00:26:04,251 --> 00:26:06,834 The cooks ask if they should buy raisins. 477 00:26:10,167 --> 00:26:11,751 Where are you going? 478 00:26:13,376 --> 00:26:14,584 Wherever I like. 479 00:26:14,792 --> 00:26:17,917 On waking, sir Lancelot, the bed was empty. 480 00:26:18,126 --> 00:26:21,209 Every minute I spend in that stupid bed is wasted. 481 00:26:21,417 --> 00:26:22,959 You can say that again. 482 00:26:27,001 --> 00:26:29,417 Your scorn of ridicule is reckless. 483 00:26:29,626 --> 00:26:33,001 I'm not pregnant, the people talk, you pay no heed. 484 00:26:33,209 --> 00:26:36,584 Remember when your predecessor couldn't give an heir to... 485 00:26:36,792 --> 00:26:38,167 Don't say that name! 486 00:26:38,542 --> 00:26:39,584 Guinevere. 487 00:26:41,667 --> 00:26:43,626 That's why you won't touch me. 488 00:26:43,834 --> 00:26:45,876 Her memory haunts you. 489 00:26:49,417 --> 00:26:54,001 No memory haunts me, you ludicrous curly-haired schemer. 490 00:26:54,542 --> 00:26:56,501 The one you mention has vanished. 491 00:26:56,709 --> 00:26:58,584 No one knows where she is. 492 00:26:59,667 --> 00:27:01,501 And no one will ever know. 493 00:27:16,084 --> 00:27:21,751 Ruined inn, isle of britain 494 00:28:34,459 --> 00:28:35,792 No, no, no. 495 00:28:36,709 --> 00:28:38,084 No, enough! 496 00:28:38,292 --> 00:28:40,126 Calm down. It happens. 497 00:28:40,334 --> 00:28:42,251 No, it doesn't happen! 498 00:28:42,459 --> 00:28:43,501 We took a wrong turn. 499 00:28:43,709 --> 00:28:44,959 That's all we do! 500 00:28:45,167 --> 00:28:47,042 Two weeks digging like dicks! 501 00:28:47,251 --> 00:28:48,042 Three. 502 00:28:48,251 --> 00:28:49,834 To return to the main tunnel! 503 00:28:51,709 --> 00:28:53,459 I'm sick of it. 504 00:28:53,667 --> 00:28:55,084 We're totally lost. 505 00:28:55,876 --> 00:28:56,917 I'm tired. 506 00:29:20,251 --> 00:29:21,042 Yeah... 507 00:29:21,251 --> 00:29:22,542 - Smell that? - Yeah. 508 00:29:22,751 --> 00:29:23,751 I'm not mad? 509 00:29:23,792 --> 00:29:26,251 I smell pillocks! 510 00:29:26,459 --> 00:29:27,459 I agree. 511 00:29:27,501 --> 00:29:28,792 Let's stay calm. 512 00:29:29,001 --> 00:29:30,542 Patience takes time. 513 00:29:30,751 --> 00:29:32,001 Some have questions. 514 00:29:32,209 --> 00:29:33,001 Not you! 515 00:29:33,209 --> 00:29:35,626 If your brother's dumb, why name him colonel? 516 00:29:35,834 --> 00:29:38,501 Colonel by aroma only, I told you. 517 00:29:38,709 --> 00:29:39,709 To encourage him. 518 00:29:39,751 --> 00:29:40,751 For being dumb? 519 00:29:40,834 --> 00:29:42,542 I can hold 37 plums in my bum! 520 00:29:42,751 --> 00:29:43,751 Enough! 521 00:29:43,917 --> 00:29:45,084 A question. 522 00:29:45,292 --> 00:29:46,292 Don't be shy. 523 00:29:46,501 --> 00:29:48,751 - All questions count. - We'll answer calmly. 524 00:29:48,959 --> 00:29:50,792 Patience requires no sauce. 525 00:29:56,042 --> 00:29:57,167 Why do we do 526 00:29:57,376 --> 00:29:58,667 everything 527 00:29:59,626 --> 00:30:00,626 underground? 528 00:30:00,667 --> 00:30:01,959 I don't believe it! 529 00:30:02,167 --> 00:30:04,209 Who are these pillocks? 530 00:30:04,417 --> 00:30:05,417 Incredible! 531 00:30:05,584 --> 00:30:08,001 Be quiet! There's a curfew up above. 532 00:30:08,209 --> 00:30:09,292 The pillocks! 533 00:30:09,501 --> 00:30:10,917 The pillocks! 534 00:30:11,126 --> 00:30:12,209 Unbelievable! 535 00:30:12,417 --> 00:30:14,167 Unbelievable! 536 00:30:14,376 --> 00:30:16,584 If the kaamelott patrol passes, 537 00:30:16,792 --> 00:30:18,167 we've had it. 538 00:30:19,167 --> 00:30:20,167 Kaamelott patrols 539 00:30:20,292 --> 00:30:21,751 are all pillocks! 540 00:30:21,959 --> 00:30:23,709 You'll get us butchered! 541 00:30:23,917 --> 00:30:24,959 Pillocks! 542 00:30:27,667 --> 00:30:30,126 Know what's going on up there? 543 00:30:30,334 --> 00:30:32,834 Do you want to resist above ground? 544 00:30:33,042 --> 00:30:34,042 Very funny! 545 00:30:34,251 --> 00:30:36,417 - I'm splitting my sides. - Sidestep. 546 00:30:36,626 --> 00:30:38,209 Go on, let's bust a gut. 547 00:30:38,417 --> 00:30:39,417 Gut rot! 548 00:30:39,626 --> 00:30:41,917 Restrictions on light, on travel, 549 00:30:42,126 --> 00:30:45,626 on weapons, on the number of people in a room. 550 00:30:45,834 --> 00:30:46,834 On string! 551 00:30:47,001 --> 00:30:48,209 - No. - On food. 552 00:30:48,417 --> 00:30:51,084 No, let's avoid that. I can't... 553 00:30:51,834 --> 00:30:53,959 I don't have the right figures. 554 00:30:56,084 --> 00:30:59,167 After all the tunnel collapses we've had, 555 00:30:59,376 --> 00:31:01,001 the lack of air 556 00:31:01,209 --> 00:31:02,876 and nearly suffocating... 557 00:31:03,084 --> 00:31:04,292 After all the soil, 558 00:31:04,501 --> 00:31:06,792 you ask why we're underground? 559 00:31:07,209 --> 00:31:08,584 We're underground... 560 00:31:09,209 --> 00:31:11,126 Because it's classy. 561 00:31:11,501 --> 00:31:14,792 Where are the crunchies? On the isle of britain? 562 00:31:15,001 --> 00:31:16,084 No, my ducklings. 563 00:31:16,292 --> 00:31:17,376 They're... 564 00:31:17,584 --> 00:31:18,792 Under britain! 565 00:31:19,959 --> 00:31:21,209 Take your picks 566 00:31:21,417 --> 00:31:23,917 and dig like real heroes! 567 00:31:24,126 --> 00:31:26,626 Show us your balls, you old women! 568 00:31:26,834 --> 00:31:28,084 Yeah! 569 00:31:41,459 --> 00:31:44,292 Excuse me, rather than encourage morons 570 00:31:44,501 --> 00:31:48,376 and dig Willy-nilly, you could perhaps map the tunnels. 571 00:31:49,959 --> 00:31:53,459 When we said, "let's have Merlin as our magician," 572 00:31:53,876 --> 00:31:55,959 wasn't he supposed to do magic? 573 00:31:56,167 --> 00:31:59,126 But he never does. He just nags about maps. 574 00:31:59,334 --> 00:32:02,209 Calm down or we'll have you executed. 575 00:32:23,626 --> 00:32:24,626 Hello, my friend. 576 00:32:24,792 --> 00:32:26,001 Don't "hello'" me! 577 00:32:26,209 --> 00:32:27,626 You got a letter, Guinevere. 578 00:32:27,834 --> 00:32:29,459 My spies are categorical. 579 00:32:29,667 --> 00:32:30,667 A real letter, 580 00:32:30,876 --> 00:32:32,917 with words and all? 581 00:32:33,667 --> 00:32:35,376 By what miracle? 582 00:32:35,584 --> 00:32:37,584 Madam cannot receive mail. 583 00:32:37,792 --> 00:32:40,167 I know, nincompoop, on my order. 584 00:32:40,376 --> 00:32:41,626 And so, no mail. 585 00:32:41,834 --> 00:32:43,209 Hidden in a cake. 586 00:32:43,417 --> 00:32:45,626 Slyly brought here as a treat. 587 00:32:45,834 --> 00:32:48,626 Betrayal! I'll have the baker's boys hung. 588 00:32:48,834 --> 00:32:50,042 And the fool 589 00:32:50,251 --> 00:32:52,084 courting you so perfidiously 590 00:32:52,292 --> 00:32:54,042 will be punished accordingly. 591 00:32:54,251 --> 00:32:56,417 But I got no letter. 592 00:32:56,626 --> 00:32:58,209 In a cake? 593 00:32:58,667 --> 00:32:59,667 A cake, yes. 594 00:32:59,834 --> 00:33:02,459 Will you both dare to contradict me? 595 00:33:02,667 --> 00:33:05,251 Was it an oblong cake? 596 00:33:05,667 --> 00:33:07,792 - Oblong? - It wasn't unusual? 597 00:33:08,001 --> 00:33:09,001 A letter in it. 598 00:33:09,042 --> 00:33:10,417 If it was oblong... 599 00:33:10,626 --> 00:33:12,959 I'm not here about the cake's shape! 600 00:33:13,167 --> 00:33:15,667 - I want that letter! - There isn't one! 601 00:33:15,876 --> 00:33:17,251 Search if you want. 602 00:33:17,459 --> 00:33:20,042 It won't take you long, given the size 603 00:33:20,251 --> 00:33:22,959 of the splendid closet you keep me in. 604 00:33:23,167 --> 00:33:24,167 My dear... 605 00:33:24,292 --> 00:33:25,334 I know. 606 00:33:25,876 --> 00:33:27,126 It lacks appeal, 607 00:33:27,584 --> 00:33:30,209 but it has a number of virtues. 608 00:33:30,876 --> 00:33:32,001 Virtues? 609 00:33:33,376 --> 00:33:34,667 It's discreet, 610 00:33:34,876 --> 00:33:37,126 almost impossible to find 611 00:33:37,334 --> 00:33:38,959 and isolated to discourage flight. 612 00:33:39,167 --> 00:33:40,709 Oh, those virtues. 613 00:33:40,917 --> 00:33:42,376 Shall I summon the decorators again? 614 00:33:42,584 --> 00:33:47,084 No, thank you. We've already tried red, green, orange... 615 00:33:47,292 --> 00:33:48,334 It stays ugly. 616 00:33:48,542 --> 00:33:50,251 It's a ruined castle. 617 00:33:51,209 --> 00:33:53,459 The old fortress of king ban. 618 00:33:54,334 --> 00:33:56,334 - My father... - Yes, ruined. 619 00:33:56,542 --> 00:33:57,917 Ruined and haunted! 620 00:33:58,126 --> 00:33:59,126 Come on... 621 00:33:59,167 --> 00:34:00,876 We're both scared to death! 622 00:34:01,084 --> 00:34:05,334 Yes, we see hazy forms at night. 623 00:34:05,542 --> 00:34:07,584 I'm very sorry indeed. 624 00:34:09,792 --> 00:34:11,042 Ask anything of me. 625 00:34:11,417 --> 00:34:12,417 Let me leave. 626 00:34:16,376 --> 00:34:20,751 All right, summon the decorators. It'll be someone to talk to. 627 00:34:20,959 --> 00:34:22,792 They're not allowed... 628 00:34:35,501 --> 00:34:38,292 Drat, drat, drat... 629 00:34:38,501 --> 00:34:39,501 What? 630 00:34:39,667 --> 00:34:42,959 I wanted to pass farms, but many of them have gone. 631 00:34:43,167 --> 00:34:44,959 Pass farms? 632 00:34:45,167 --> 00:34:48,626 Yes, I'd have loved to see the peasants' faces 633 00:34:48,834 --> 00:34:51,417 full of hope you're back to save them. 634 00:34:51,626 --> 00:34:53,751 Get off my back about that. 635 00:34:53,959 --> 00:34:56,501 The farms have all gone anyway. 636 00:34:56,709 --> 00:34:59,792 Taxes and the saxons wiped them out one by one. 637 00:35:00,001 --> 00:35:02,376 Duke, I don't give a fig! 638 00:35:02,584 --> 00:35:04,876 Yes, I understand perfectly. 639 00:35:06,209 --> 00:35:07,876 I'm such a dummy. 640 00:35:08,084 --> 00:35:13,209 I nag you about saving logres when there's nothing left to save. 641 00:35:15,459 --> 00:35:19,251 Did you know Lancelot sentenced children to death? 642 00:35:19,459 --> 00:35:21,001 You didn't know that? 643 00:35:22,792 --> 00:35:24,001 Here in aquitaine, 644 00:35:24,209 --> 00:35:25,542 things are peaceful. 645 00:35:25,751 --> 00:35:27,667 Kaamelott is far away. 646 00:35:27,876 --> 00:35:29,417 Except for taxes. 647 00:35:29,959 --> 00:35:31,292 Not my concern. 648 00:35:31,501 --> 00:35:33,876 They've increased tenfold. 649 00:35:34,084 --> 00:35:36,084 To pay Saxon mercenaries. 650 00:35:36,292 --> 00:35:37,292 Not my concern. 651 00:35:37,501 --> 00:35:39,626 It's partly your concern 652 00:35:39,834 --> 00:35:42,417 as the saxons are looking for you. 653 00:35:42,626 --> 00:35:45,709 Even so, it's not my concern. 654 00:35:47,792 --> 00:35:49,501 Know what the legend says? 655 00:35:50,251 --> 00:35:52,084 I sense it's not my concern. 656 00:35:55,251 --> 00:35:58,667 That Lancelot didn't seize power by force, 657 00:35:58,876 --> 00:36:01,376 but that you gave it to him. 658 00:36:14,167 --> 00:36:16,834 A good fire's comforting. 659 00:36:17,542 --> 00:36:20,001 Could you have got the direction wrong? 660 00:36:20,209 --> 00:36:21,584 You wanted to go east? 661 00:36:21,792 --> 00:36:25,376 Yes, but that's the pole star. And we came that way. 662 00:36:25,584 --> 00:36:27,792 No, that way, heading east. 663 00:36:28,001 --> 00:36:29,917 No, we're heading north. 664 00:36:31,167 --> 00:36:32,209 Where did you learn 665 00:36:32,417 --> 00:36:35,042 about navigation and the stars? 666 00:36:35,917 --> 00:36:37,001 - Rome. - Right. 667 00:36:37,209 --> 00:36:39,001 Was the legion awesome? 668 00:36:40,001 --> 00:36:41,167 No, not really. 669 00:36:41,376 --> 00:36:43,084 Are you taking me north? 670 00:36:43,292 --> 00:36:44,501 We're near gaunes. 671 00:36:44,709 --> 00:36:46,292 No, east. Sleep now. 672 00:37:08,167 --> 00:37:09,167 First position! 673 00:37:10,459 --> 00:37:11,751 First! 674 00:37:13,167 --> 00:37:14,167 Second! 675 00:37:15,334 --> 00:37:17,084 Third! 676 00:37:17,959 --> 00:37:20,209 In rhythm! No two are in Harmony. 677 00:37:20,417 --> 00:37:21,834 Fouflh! 678 00:37:22,251 --> 00:37:23,751 Come on, you cuties! 679 00:37:23,959 --> 00:37:25,334 War is music! 680 00:37:25,542 --> 00:37:28,709 Hear that? War is music! Fifth! 681 00:37:28,917 --> 00:37:29,917 Fifth! 682 00:37:30,542 --> 00:37:31,917 Sixth! 683 00:37:32,417 --> 00:37:35,167 No food or sleep until you're synchronized! 684 00:37:35,376 --> 00:37:37,334 Seventh! 685 00:37:38,251 --> 00:37:40,376 Papinius, move it! 686 00:37:40,584 --> 00:37:42,167 Eighth! 687 00:37:42,917 --> 00:37:44,917 Spin those Spears! 688 00:37:45,126 --> 00:37:46,126 And end! 689 00:37:46,709 --> 00:37:48,792 Stop! Dump the training Spears! 690 00:37:49,001 --> 00:37:51,001 Head over to the gates. 691 00:37:51,209 --> 00:37:52,751 There's luggage to carry! 692 00:37:52,959 --> 00:37:55,417 Caesarean Mauritania 693 00:37:56,501 --> 00:37:58,417 30 years earlier 694 00:38:29,251 --> 00:38:31,959 - Come on, papinius. - I can't go on. 695 00:38:32,167 --> 00:38:33,917 I can't keep watching your arse. 696 00:38:36,501 --> 00:38:37,876 Papinius! 697 00:38:38,417 --> 00:38:40,417 Arturus can't keep watching your arse! 698 00:38:46,501 --> 00:38:49,834 I think she wants to throw a tea party for the lads. 699 00:38:50,042 --> 00:38:52,334 That's kind, furadja, but no need. 700 00:38:53,876 --> 00:38:55,417 They're starving. 701 00:38:56,001 --> 00:38:58,501 That's kind of you, furadja. 702 00:38:58,709 --> 00:39:01,417 Come on, you clowns! Get over here. 703 00:39:07,792 --> 00:39:08,959 See what I see? 704 00:39:09,167 --> 00:39:10,167 Dates, cakes... 705 00:39:10,292 --> 00:39:11,751 Don't pig out! 706 00:39:11,959 --> 00:39:13,126 No crumbs, ok! 707 00:39:13,334 --> 00:39:14,334 Thank furadja! 708 00:39:14,542 --> 00:39:16,126 Thank you, furadja. 709 00:39:16,334 --> 00:39:17,584 Thanks, bitch. 710 00:39:18,542 --> 00:39:19,542 She's fishy. 711 00:39:38,834 --> 00:39:40,084 Arturus... 712 00:39:40,584 --> 00:39:41,667 Wake up. 713 00:39:42,292 --> 00:39:44,001 Did lightning strike you? 714 00:39:44,501 --> 00:39:46,292 Arturus, your cock's showing. 715 00:40:10,709 --> 00:40:11,917 Duke? 716 00:40:23,001 --> 00:40:24,959 Is this all you bring in tax? 717 00:40:25,167 --> 00:40:27,417 Can we fill the coffers with two beets 718 00:40:27,626 --> 00:40:29,251 and a Clay jug? 719 00:40:29,459 --> 00:40:32,917 I fear we'll have to triple taxes next time. 720 00:40:33,126 --> 00:40:34,626 Multiply by three? 721 00:40:34,834 --> 00:40:35,834 I'll need refreshments. 722 00:40:36,042 --> 00:40:38,209 Write. Don't do it mentally. 723 00:40:38,667 --> 00:40:40,626 Writing is fast, but I trip up. 724 00:40:40,834 --> 00:40:42,251 Refusal to pay. 725 00:40:42,459 --> 00:40:43,459 Mutiny. 726 00:40:43,501 --> 00:40:44,709 Resistance! 727 00:40:44,917 --> 00:40:47,626 You can't deal with unarmed Hicks? 728 00:40:47,834 --> 00:40:48,834 A new tax? 729 00:40:49,001 --> 00:40:51,292 Half-dead, we keep paying? 730 00:40:51,501 --> 00:40:53,834 And kaamelott pays you to beat us up! 731 00:40:54,042 --> 00:40:56,751 I saved months for this beet! It's mine! 732 00:40:58,751 --> 00:40:59,876 Murderers! 733 00:41:00,751 --> 00:41:01,751 - Are you ok? - No. 734 00:41:01,959 --> 00:41:02,959 Here's my tax. 735 00:41:05,667 --> 00:41:07,292 What this is? 736 00:41:07,501 --> 00:41:08,501 His wife's ashes! 737 00:41:08,626 --> 00:41:09,834 The ashes of his wife 738 00:41:10,042 --> 00:41:12,501 who didn't deserve to die in chicken shit! 739 00:41:12,709 --> 00:41:13,917 Or to die 740 00:41:14,126 --> 00:41:16,417 murdered by Lancelot of the lake! 741 00:41:17,709 --> 00:41:19,542 Who deserved to die in peace, 742 00:41:19,751 --> 00:41:21,376 lying on her fertile land 743 00:41:21,751 --> 00:41:22,917 with a June breeze 744 00:41:23,334 --> 00:41:25,834 bringing her the comforting caress 745 00:41:26,042 --> 00:41:27,709 of sweet summer pollen. 746 00:41:27,917 --> 00:41:30,334 You can steal our money, 747 00:41:30,709 --> 00:41:32,084 but our feelings 748 00:41:32,626 --> 00:41:34,001 you can never take. 749 00:41:34,209 --> 00:41:35,209 That's fine. 750 00:41:35,751 --> 00:41:38,417 We don't give a damn about feelings. 751 00:41:38,626 --> 00:41:40,626 Absque argento... 752 00:41:41,126 --> 00:41:41,917 I forget. 753 00:41:42,126 --> 00:41:43,126 That's a pity. 754 00:41:43,334 --> 00:41:45,126 Latin impresses folk. 755 00:41:45,334 --> 00:41:47,584 They think you know your stuff. 756 00:41:47,792 --> 00:41:48,834 Kaamelott 757 00:41:49,042 --> 00:41:50,042 and Saxon people 758 00:41:50,292 --> 00:41:53,209 send their condolences to you 759 00:41:53,417 --> 00:41:54,417 and your daughter. 760 00:41:54,542 --> 00:41:56,751 Not my daughter, my wife. 761 00:41:57,167 --> 00:41:59,417 She's new. My new wife, like. 762 00:41:59,626 --> 00:42:01,334 - You see. - What? 763 00:42:01,876 --> 00:42:03,292 You married too soon. 764 00:42:03,501 --> 00:42:05,251 Who says he married too soon? 765 00:42:05,459 --> 00:42:06,667 We look like clowns. 766 00:42:06,876 --> 00:42:08,709 Farming's too tough alone. 767 00:42:08,917 --> 00:42:11,334 When you want to do a good job. 768 00:42:11,542 --> 00:42:13,917 If you scratch your nuts all day, 769 00:42:14,126 --> 00:42:15,459 single life is easier. 770 00:42:15,667 --> 00:42:18,709 However much we scratch, we sleep honestly! 771 00:42:24,834 --> 00:42:26,417 We pay you well enough 772 00:42:26,626 --> 00:42:28,251 to handle cranky yokels. 773 00:42:44,876 --> 00:42:46,709 We sounded the horn right away. 774 00:42:46,917 --> 00:42:49,251 30 war machines at 200 Poles! 775 00:42:49,667 --> 00:42:51,626 And now you play the tune? 776 00:42:51,834 --> 00:42:53,917 No one's left to alert us. 777 00:42:54,126 --> 00:42:55,751 Lancelot emptied the lookouts. 778 00:42:55,959 --> 00:42:58,292 What? Emptied the lookouts? Absurd! 779 00:42:58,501 --> 00:42:59,876 Why on earth would I? 780 00:43:00,084 --> 00:43:01,376 Five weeks ago, you took 781 00:43:01,584 --> 00:43:04,126 fifty more men to hunt Arthur and his knights. 782 00:43:04,501 --> 00:43:07,834 Did I say they had to be taken from the lookout posts? 783 00:43:08,042 --> 00:43:10,501 Fifty saxons have to come from somewhere. 784 00:43:10,709 --> 00:43:12,459 And not the hen run! 785 00:43:13,084 --> 00:43:14,084 Artour! 786 00:43:15,001 --> 00:43:16,459 Artour! 787 00:43:19,501 --> 00:43:22,834 Artour! What's the meaning of this? 788 00:43:24,417 --> 00:43:25,834 It's the burgundians. 789 00:43:26,042 --> 00:43:27,667 Sorry, it's the burgundians! 790 00:43:27,876 --> 00:43:30,167 The burgundians! No need to worry. 791 00:43:30,376 --> 00:43:31,792 Did I hear wrong 792 00:43:32,001 --> 00:43:33,709 or did that idiot call me Arthur? 793 00:43:33,917 --> 00:43:35,167 He doesn't know our tongue. 794 00:43:35,376 --> 00:43:36,917 Maybe Arthur is this castle. 795 00:43:37,126 --> 00:43:39,084 Or simply means "chief". 796 00:43:41,042 --> 00:43:42,042 Artour! 797 00:43:42,167 --> 00:43:43,542 I'll crush that joker! 798 00:43:43,751 --> 00:43:47,709 Calm down. You know by now the fellow's a maniac! 799 00:43:47,917 --> 00:43:48,709 Artour! 800 00:43:48,917 --> 00:43:50,042 What, 801 00:43:50,251 --> 00:43:51,834 you degenerate bugger? 802 00:43:52,042 --> 00:43:53,084 Artour! 803 00:43:53,876 --> 00:43:55,126 War 804 00:43:55,584 --> 00:43:57,167 is an illusion! 805 00:43:57,376 --> 00:43:59,167 He speaks our tongue! 806 00:43:59,376 --> 00:44:00,417 That's odd. 807 00:44:00,626 --> 00:44:02,417 He learnt since last time? 808 00:44:02,751 --> 00:44:04,042 War 809 00:44:04,251 --> 00:44:06,251 is a salsify! 810 00:44:06,459 --> 00:44:07,584 There, you see? 811 00:44:07,792 --> 00:44:08,917 I think we must 812 00:44:09,126 --> 00:44:11,292 discipline ourselves and ignore... 813 00:44:11,501 --> 00:44:12,501 I'm off. 814 00:44:12,667 --> 00:44:13,917 See to this clown. 815 00:44:14,126 --> 00:44:15,126 Go and rest. 816 00:44:15,334 --> 00:44:16,876 Do we send a couple of lancers? 817 00:44:17,084 --> 00:44:19,417 Lancers? For burgundians? 818 00:44:19,626 --> 00:44:20,709 For piece of mine. 819 00:44:20,917 --> 00:44:21,917 Don't bother. 820 00:44:22,042 --> 00:44:23,209 Are you sure? 821 00:44:23,417 --> 00:44:25,667 Don't move, we said! Follow orders! 822 00:44:25,876 --> 00:44:27,751 "Ignore burgundians." 823 00:44:27,959 --> 00:44:30,084 An order from king Arthur's day. 824 00:44:30,292 --> 00:44:33,209 Just a little anecdote from the archivist. 825 00:45:06,542 --> 00:45:07,334 My god... 826 00:45:07,542 --> 00:45:08,626 By all the saints. 827 00:45:08,834 --> 00:45:11,251 Stand, you wretches, for king Arthur! 828 00:45:12,126 --> 00:45:13,501 Don't start. 829 00:45:13,709 --> 00:45:15,709 I'm not a king. No need to stand. 830 00:45:16,209 --> 00:45:17,501 What... 831 00:45:20,042 --> 00:45:22,042 What exactly are you up to? 832 00:45:22,251 --> 00:45:23,876 Here we are, my hearties. 833 00:45:24,084 --> 00:45:27,542 A little snack to start the day nicely. 834 00:45:35,751 --> 00:45:39,876 Forest of gaunes, continental logres 835 00:45:40,084 --> 00:45:42,126 war! War! 836 00:45:43,459 --> 00:45:44,501 Salsify! 837 00:45:53,834 --> 00:45:55,042 Classic. 838 00:45:55,251 --> 00:45:56,501 Getting that tangled up 839 00:45:56,709 --> 00:45:58,334 shows talent. 840 00:45:58,542 --> 00:45:59,626 Like in Arthur's day. 841 00:45:59,834 --> 00:46:01,751 No machine is in place. 842 00:46:01,959 --> 00:46:05,501 The confusion with the machines is a mere detail 843 00:46:05,709 --> 00:46:08,251 as they are too close to the fortress. 844 00:46:08,459 --> 00:46:10,792 Even facing the right way, 845 00:46:11,001 --> 00:46:13,209 their shots would pass over our heads 846 00:46:13,417 --> 00:46:16,167 and land in the field of the old bugger out back. 847 00:46:38,459 --> 00:46:40,667 You know right away how it'll end. 848 00:46:40,876 --> 00:46:41,876 Why even watch? 849 00:46:42,084 --> 00:46:43,667 Libido sciendi. 850 00:46:43,876 --> 00:46:45,584 The desire to know. 851 00:46:45,792 --> 00:46:46,792 Yes, 852 00:46:47,001 --> 00:46:49,001 a tad unlikely in this context... 853 00:46:49,209 --> 00:46:52,167 Does the desire to know need context? 854 00:46:52,376 --> 00:46:53,376 You see. 855 00:46:56,792 --> 00:46:57,959 Sire, please... 856 00:46:58,167 --> 00:46:59,209 Don't call me that. 857 00:46:59,417 --> 00:47:00,417 Surely... 858 00:47:00,459 --> 00:47:02,584 Read my lips. I'm splitting. 859 00:47:02,792 --> 00:47:03,792 Right now. 860 00:47:03,876 --> 00:47:05,084 You insisted 861 00:47:05,292 --> 00:47:08,417 I met your boys with their eyes full of courage... 862 00:47:08,834 --> 00:47:10,542 When I say boys... 863 00:47:10,751 --> 00:47:11,917 How old is he? 864 00:47:12,667 --> 00:47:14,542 Sire, we couldn't be choosy. 865 00:47:14,751 --> 00:47:16,542 We had places to fill. 866 00:47:16,751 --> 00:47:18,042 He's my kid brother. 867 00:47:18,251 --> 00:47:20,251 I keep asking for a cushion 868 00:47:20,459 --> 00:47:21,459 to be higher. 869 00:47:21,501 --> 00:47:24,042 - I'm sick of it! - Sire, say something. 870 00:47:24,709 --> 00:47:26,167 What can I say? 871 00:47:26,376 --> 00:47:28,542 What are you playing at here? 872 00:47:28,751 --> 00:47:30,917 Are you safe on the continent? 873 00:47:31,126 --> 00:47:33,542 You realize this is resistance? 874 00:47:36,292 --> 00:47:37,292 We're a joke. 875 00:47:37,459 --> 00:47:39,126 We thought we did right 876 00:47:39,334 --> 00:47:41,084 to intervene at our level. 877 00:47:41,292 --> 00:47:42,292 It's too low. 878 00:47:42,417 --> 00:47:45,001 We come here, sit, have our snack... 879 00:47:45,209 --> 00:47:46,834 Look at our round table. 880 00:47:47,042 --> 00:47:48,417 It's pathetic. 881 00:47:58,501 --> 00:47:59,626 Not at all. 882 00:48:00,209 --> 00:48:03,959 Everything's pretty pathetic here, but not that. 883 00:48:04,167 --> 00:48:06,251 Sire, you don't have to mock. 884 00:48:08,084 --> 00:48:10,042 Modest, humble... 885 00:48:10,251 --> 00:48:12,501 Made without showy skill, 886 00:48:12,709 --> 00:48:14,417 with salvaged material... 887 00:48:15,209 --> 00:48:16,584 Just round enough 888 00:48:16,792 --> 00:48:18,667 for no one to be at a corner 889 00:48:18,876 --> 00:48:20,376 or far from another. 890 00:48:27,584 --> 00:48:28,751 Move! 891 00:48:38,917 --> 00:48:39,917 Go on. 892 00:48:40,417 --> 00:48:41,417 Who are you? 893 00:48:41,917 --> 00:48:44,001 - I introduce myself? - Yes! 894 00:48:45,334 --> 00:48:46,126 Girflet. 895 00:48:46,334 --> 00:48:47,376 Sir girflet. 896 00:48:47,584 --> 00:48:48,584 Sir? 897 00:48:48,626 --> 00:48:50,834 At pendragon's table everyone's a lord, 898 00:48:51,042 --> 00:48:52,792 whatever his origin. 899 00:48:53,001 --> 00:48:54,001 Even without land? 900 00:48:54,084 --> 00:48:55,209 Even without land. 901 00:48:55,584 --> 00:48:56,792 Sir girflet, 902 00:48:57,001 --> 00:48:58,626 my neighbour's cousin. 903 00:48:58,834 --> 00:49:01,126 I mean my neighbour here. 904 00:49:01,501 --> 00:49:03,751 This neighbour and his brother. 905 00:49:07,459 --> 00:49:08,584 I say "sir" too? 906 00:49:08,792 --> 00:49:09,834 Like the others. 907 00:49:10,042 --> 00:49:12,126 Sir lucan, knight of the squid. 908 00:49:12,334 --> 00:49:13,959 I'm brother to bedever... 909 00:49:14,167 --> 00:49:15,167 Sir. 910 00:49:15,209 --> 00:49:16,209 Sir bedever. 911 00:49:16,417 --> 00:49:18,292 - And cousin to girflet. - Sir. 912 00:49:18,501 --> 00:49:19,834 Sir girflet. 913 00:49:23,084 --> 00:49:24,084 Knight? 914 00:49:24,126 --> 00:49:25,334 Not really. 915 00:49:25,542 --> 00:49:26,751 A knight... 916 00:49:26,959 --> 00:49:28,626 He's not a knight yet. 917 00:49:28,834 --> 00:49:31,084 All right, but knight of what? 918 00:49:31,292 --> 00:49:32,459 The squid. 919 00:49:33,876 --> 00:49:35,084 Not great, huh? 920 00:49:36,126 --> 00:49:36,917 Squid? 921 00:49:37,126 --> 00:49:38,459 Not as in squidgy. 922 00:49:38,667 --> 00:49:40,834 No, squid the animal. 923 00:49:43,334 --> 00:49:44,126 Calamari? 924 00:49:44,334 --> 00:49:45,334 Exactly. 925 00:49:45,376 --> 00:49:46,792 Not the finest totem. 926 00:49:47,334 --> 00:49:48,501 I do as I want. 927 00:49:49,792 --> 00:49:50,792 Carry on. 928 00:49:51,834 --> 00:49:55,001 Sir bedever, brother to sir lucan, 929 00:49:55,209 --> 00:49:56,376 knight of the squid, 930 00:49:56,584 --> 00:49:57,751 and cousin to sir girflet. 931 00:49:58,292 --> 00:50:00,501 Bam! Not one mistake. 932 00:50:00,709 --> 00:50:01,876 You can tell 933 00:50:02,084 --> 00:50:03,417 where the brains are. 934 00:50:03,626 --> 00:50:04,751 Sir rostan. 935 00:50:04,959 --> 00:50:07,542 I'd have liked knight of provence 936 00:50:07,751 --> 00:50:09,917 but it was taken on the old table. 937 00:50:10,126 --> 00:50:13,209 - Knight of provence? - Wasn't there a provencal? 938 00:50:13,417 --> 00:50:15,626 Damn it, we already explained! 939 00:50:15,834 --> 00:50:17,292 That was a mistake. 940 00:50:17,501 --> 00:50:19,417 Sir percival, who comes from wales. 941 00:50:19,626 --> 00:50:21,667 Knight of provence. 942 00:50:22,126 --> 00:50:23,667 Or sir provencal. 943 00:50:23,876 --> 00:50:25,167 Sounds like a recipe. 944 00:50:25,709 --> 00:50:27,126 Or rostan of provence, 945 00:50:27,334 --> 00:50:28,501 more like a village. 946 00:50:28,709 --> 00:50:29,917 Sir gawain. 947 00:50:30,126 --> 00:50:33,334 I'm already a knight, but I'm not proud of it. 948 00:50:33,542 --> 00:50:35,042 Nephew to Arthur pendragon, 949 00:50:35,626 --> 00:50:36,667 do I need to say? 950 00:50:37,084 --> 00:50:38,292 Son of king loth of orkney, 951 00:50:38,501 --> 00:50:40,376 a foul traitor. Thank you. 952 00:50:45,917 --> 00:50:46,917 Finally! 953 00:50:47,792 --> 00:50:48,584 What time is this? 954 00:50:48,792 --> 00:50:50,667 Baddies were chasing me. 955 00:50:51,167 --> 00:50:52,917 Baddies were chasing you? 956 00:51:10,709 --> 00:51:12,417 Blackguards! 957 00:51:19,167 --> 00:51:20,584 Father! 958 00:51:25,459 --> 00:51:27,417 Young adventurers above. Come quick! 959 00:51:27,626 --> 00:51:29,292 - Adventurers? - Above? 960 00:51:29,501 --> 00:51:30,501 How'd they find us? 961 00:51:30,709 --> 00:51:32,459 - Who cares? - Are they spies? 962 00:51:32,667 --> 00:51:33,834 They saw the tunnel? 963 00:51:35,209 --> 00:51:36,959 Say we're fully staffed. 964 00:51:37,167 --> 00:51:38,334 They don't want work. 965 00:51:38,542 --> 00:51:40,751 They walked days to get here! 966 00:51:40,959 --> 00:51:42,751 They can walk days to leave. 967 00:51:42,959 --> 00:51:43,751 Screw it! 968 00:51:43,959 --> 00:51:44,959 Screw-d river. 969 00:51:46,542 --> 00:51:48,501 Father, uncle percival... 970 00:51:48,709 --> 00:51:49,917 You're heroes for them. 971 00:52:01,417 --> 00:52:02,417 Sir percival. 972 00:52:03,751 --> 00:52:05,792 Sir caradoc. I'm honoured... 973 00:52:07,042 --> 00:52:08,167 Move, pillocks! 974 00:52:08,376 --> 00:52:09,376 Keep it short. 975 00:52:10,042 --> 00:52:12,459 What do you want? Fighting techniques? 976 00:52:13,084 --> 00:52:16,626 I'm petrok, son of roparzh, breeder and landowner. 977 00:52:17,251 --> 00:52:19,292 With my squires, gareth and iagu... 978 00:52:19,501 --> 00:52:21,376 What? We're your squires now? 979 00:52:21,584 --> 00:52:22,876 Squires, you yokel? 980 00:52:23,084 --> 00:52:24,324 - Where's your horse? - At home. 981 00:52:24,501 --> 00:52:26,501 I request your daughter's hand. 982 00:52:26,709 --> 00:52:27,501 What? 983 00:52:27,709 --> 00:52:29,042 Father, calm down. 984 00:52:29,251 --> 00:52:30,459 You? 985 00:52:32,417 --> 00:52:34,334 - Where did you meet? - At market. 986 00:52:34,542 --> 00:52:36,626 - At market? - Let's discuss 987 00:52:36,834 --> 00:52:38,709 land and movable property. 988 00:52:38,917 --> 00:52:40,709 Try to show style for once. 989 00:52:41,167 --> 00:52:43,584 - I'll move fast. - And clear off! 990 00:52:43,792 --> 00:52:45,626 I can express noble feelings. 991 00:52:45,834 --> 00:52:46,834 I planned to. 992 00:52:47,042 --> 00:52:48,126 Enough bullshit. 993 00:52:48,334 --> 00:52:50,376 Can we take two minutes... 994 00:52:50,584 --> 00:52:53,209 Father, they're active in the resistance. 995 00:52:56,417 --> 00:52:59,417 Above ground, like real lemons! 996 00:53:03,709 --> 00:53:06,709 Ok, pin-dicks, run to granny before it rains. 997 00:53:06,917 --> 00:53:09,042 Lemons and pin-dicks who live with granny... 998 00:53:09,251 --> 00:53:10,251 Fight back! 999 00:53:10,376 --> 00:53:11,584 Relate your deeds. 1000 00:53:11,792 --> 00:53:14,292 Yes. Whenever we meet saxons, 1001 00:53:14,501 --> 00:53:16,126 we insult them! 1002 00:53:16,334 --> 00:53:17,667 - Under your breath. - Of course. 1003 00:53:17,876 --> 00:53:19,084 What if they heard? 1004 00:53:19,292 --> 00:53:21,334 I threw blueberries at them once! 1005 00:53:21,542 --> 00:53:22,334 All I found. 1006 00:53:22,542 --> 00:53:23,751 They soon scrammed. 1007 00:53:23,959 --> 00:53:26,584 They're a bit useless, but brave. 1008 00:53:26,792 --> 00:53:28,584 They need training by real knights. 1009 00:53:28,792 --> 00:53:29,792 We hate Lancelot! 1010 00:53:29,834 --> 00:53:31,751 We want the round table back! 1011 00:53:31,959 --> 00:53:33,792 We fight for Arthur pendragon. 1012 00:53:34,001 --> 00:53:35,001 Coming here, 1013 00:53:35,209 --> 00:53:37,042 we weren't afraid to say 1014 00:53:37,251 --> 00:53:40,126 that we were off to meet caradoc and percival. 1015 00:53:40,334 --> 00:53:41,876 Even if you're wanted 1016 00:53:42,084 --> 00:53:45,417 and meeting you is a crime, we proudly stated 1017 00:53:45,626 --> 00:53:47,459 our goal all along the way! 1018 00:53:55,834 --> 00:53:56,834 Is that the alarm? 1019 00:53:57,792 --> 00:53:59,251 No idea anymore. 1020 00:53:59,459 --> 00:54:00,584 We're besieged! 1021 00:54:01,126 --> 00:54:02,251 Besieged? 1022 00:54:02,459 --> 00:54:04,542 Besieged without an army? 1023 00:54:04,751 --> 00:54:05,917 It's bad news! 1024 00:54:21,959 --> 00:54:22,959 Relax! 1025 00:54:23,042 --> 00:54:24,251 It's the burgundians. 1026 00:54:24,459 --> 00:54:25,709 What a panic! 1027 00:54:25,917 --> 00:54:28,126 They hadn't harried us for a while. 1028 00:54:28,334 --> 00:54:29,334 Don't panic! 1029 00:54:29,542 --> 00:54:32,001 You could've checked before alarming us! 1030 00:54:32,209 --> 00:54:33,209 I feared 1031 00:54:33,292 --> 00:54:34,959 they'd hurl boulders. 1032 00:54:35,167 --> 00:54:37,542 They came to attack us last year. 1033 00:54:37,751 --> 00:54:39,501 During the fig season. 1034 00:54:39,709 --> 00:54:41,209 It kept us amused. 1035 00:54:47,584 --> 00:54:48,667 Is that léodagan? 1036 00:54:48,876 --> 00:54:50,959 - Where? - There on the right. 1037 00:54:51,167 --> 00:54:53,167 Is he attacking them? 1038 00:54:53,376 --> 00:54:55,417 Unarmed, alone against 150 men? 1039 00:54:55,626 --> 00:54:57,584 Attention, it'll soon be over. 1040 00:55:02,042 --> 00:55:03,376 Where are you going? 1041 00:55:03,584 --> 00:55:05,542 Don't provoke them! 1042 00:55:05,751 --> 00:55:07,626 You'll get bolts in the bum! 1043 00:55:09,292 --> 00:55:10,667 What's wrong? 1044 00:55:10,876 --> 00:55:14,501 Gardening has ended up addling his brain. 1045 00:55:14,709 --> 00:55:15,709 That's what. 1046 00:55:15,834 --> 00:55:18,292 - Do we step in? - With what? 1047 00:55:18,667 --> 00:55:20,709 Haven't you got a spare spell? 1048 00:55:20,917 --> 00:55:23,167 A spell to calm your husband, no! 1049 00:55:41,501 --> 00:55:43,042 What means all this? 1050 00:55:53,292 --> 00:55:54,292 Maybe. 1051 00:56:34,834 --> 00:56:36,501 Look out, here they come. 1052 00:56:36,959 --> 00:56:37,959 Shit. 1053 00:56:38,001 --> 00:56:39,001 The fat slag... 1054 00:56:39,334 --> 00:56:41,376 No, the one in blue. 1055 00:56:43,417 --> 00:56:45,751 If they see we're missing... 1056 00:56:45,959 --> 00:56:46,959 We brought arturus. 1057 00:56:47,126 --> 00:56:48,376 They'll waste us. 1058 00:56:48,584 --> 00:56:50,042 Has he seen her? Can we go? 1059 00:56:50,251 --> 00:56:51,501 Let's go back. 1060 00:56:51,709 --> 00:56:53,834 Did you come to piss me off? 1061 00:56:54,042 --> 00:56:55,042 No, to be nice. 1062 00:56:55,209 --> 00:56:56,459 So be nice and belt up! 1063 00:57:02,334 --> 00:57:03,542 A ve. 1064 00:57:07,001 --> 00:57:08,834 He's arturus. 1065 00:57:10,376 --> 00:57:12,001 Arturus. 1066 00:57:13,126 --> 00:57:14,251 I can say my name! 1067 00:57:14,459 --> 00:57:16,084 - You can't. - You're a jerk. 1068 00:57:16,292 --> 00:57:18,001 Arturus. 1069 00:57:21,834 --> 00:57:22,917 And you? 1070 00:57:23,959 --> 00:57:25,334 Shedda. 1071 00:57:26,167 --> 00:57:27,209 Shedda. 1072 00:57:28,417 --> 00:57:30,751 Shit, that's beautiful. 1073 00:57:30,959 --> 00:57:32,084 Shedda! 1074 00:58:08,501 --> 00:58:11,084 "I walk through the valley of death, 1075 00:58:12,042 --> 00:58:14,209 yet I fear no evil, 1076 00:58:14,959 --> 00:58:16,542 for he is with me." 1077 00:58:29,417 --> 00:58:31,209 Starvation gives me visions. 1078 00:58:32,084 --> 00:58:33,959 - Who is it? - King Arthur, lads. 1079 00:58:34,167 --> 00:58:35,542 Alive, apparently. 1080 00:58:35,751 --> 00:58:38,542 I've said that for ten years, you salsify! 1081 00:58:39,709 --> 00:58:41,001 He rings no bells. 1082 00:58:41,209 --> 00:58:42,334 Come on... 1083 00:58:42,542 --> 00:58:44,042 Like kaamelott, where we lived... 1084 00:58:44,251 --> 00:58:46,001 We weren't on his floor. 1085 00:58:46,209 --> 00:58:50,167 Look at this, king Arthur locked in the jails 1086 00:58:50,376 --> 00:58:51,584 of his own fortress. 1087 00:58:51,792 --> 00:58:52,792 Yep... 1088 00:58:57,792 --> 00:58:59,084 Sad irony... 1089 00:58:59,626 --> 00:59:00,959 Why's he here? 1090 00:59:01,167 --> 00:59:02,167 You're on the isle? 1091 00:59:02,251 --> 00:59:03,792 They said you'd managed 1092 00:59:04,001 --> 00:59:06,042 - to hide on the continent. - Not hide. 1093 00:59:06,251 --> 00:59:07,501 Braving danger, 1094 00:59:07,709 --> 00:59:10,876 I honoured the memory of our dear Arthur 1095 00:59:11,084 --> 00:59:14,292 by uniting the best resistance fighters in gaunes! 1096 00:59:14,501 --> 00:59:15,751 Hand in hand... 1097 00:59:41,001 --> 00:59:42,001 Boom! 1098 00:59:42,334 --> 00:59:43,501 Bull's-eye! 1099 00:59:48,292 --> 00:59:50,042 So, what do you say? 1100 00:59:50,251 --> 00:59:51,959 You have Arthur at last! 1101 00:59:52,167 --> 00:59:53,167 The others too. 1102 00:59:53,292 --> 00:59:54,876 Yes, the others, but... 1103 00:59:55,084 --> 00:59:56,084 Arthur! 1104 00:59:56,251 --> 00:59:57,459 How about a drink? 1105 00:59:57,667 --> 00:59:59,917 After all, it's worth celebrating. 1106 01:00:00,126 --> 01:00:01,167 Another thing. 1107 01:00:01,376 --> 01:00:03,709 No more money wasted on hunting him. 1108 01:00:03,917 --> 01:00:05,376 How about that, mate? 1109 01:00:05,584 --> 01:00:08,917 With an isle and half our wealth, call it quits. 1110 01:00:09,126 --> 01:00:10,459 Give us a smile. 1111 01:00:10,667 --> 01:00:12,167 Arthur's in the cellar. 1112 01:00:12,376 --> 01:00:14,792 After looking under every floorboard... 1113 01:00:15,001 --> 01:00:16,167 And not finding him. 1114 01:00:16,376 --> 01:00:17,917 What do we do now? 1115 01:00:18,126 --> 01:00:19,167 Execute him? 1116 01:00:19,376 --> 01:00:21,334 The jails are chock-a-block. 1117 01:00:21,542 --> 01:00:22,542 Meals alone 1118 01:00:22,626 --> 01:00:25,167 cost a fortune in veggie peelings. 1119 01:00:25,917 --> 01:00:27,459 You must kill Arthur. 1120 01:00:27,667 --> 01:00:31,251 If the people learn he is alive and at kaamelott, 1121 01:00:31,792 --> 01:00:33,667 you risk an uprising. 1122 01:00:36,834 --> 01:00:38,417 I'm sorry. 1123 01:00:38,626 --> 01:00:40,876 You're much less popular than him. 1124 01:00:44,917 --> 01:00:46,334 Don't we get a drink? 1125 01:00:46,792 --> 01:00:48,292 You're not a nice guy. 1126 01:00:48,501 --> 01:00:51,334 There are no nice guys in this room. 1127 01:00:54,626 --> 01:00:56,792 - Merlin, where does this lead? - Up my arse! 1128 01:00:57,001 --> 01:00:58,584 Wherever we want. 1129 01:00:58,792 --> 01:01:01,876 With me in charge, things tick over better! 1130 01:01:02,251 --> 01:01:03,834 We tried to reach kaamelott. 1131 01:01:04,042 --> 01:01:05,376 You were close, morons. 1132 01:01:05,834 --> 01:01:07,167 I used your absence 1133 01:01:07,376 --> 01:01:08,834 to map the network. 1134 01:01:09,042 --> 01:01:10,209 Like I told you to! 1135 01:01:10,626 --> 01:01:12,459 But the great percival and caradoc 1136 01:01:12,667 --> 01:01:14,667 prefer to tell me 1137 01:01:14,876 --> 01:01:16,959 my magic's no use underground. 1138 01:01:25,667 --> 01:01:27,376 - That's... - In person. 1139 01:01:27,584 --> 01:01:29,001 And in a sorry state. 1140 01:01:29,459 --> 01:01:30,584 How can we save him? 1141 01:01:30,792 --> 01:01:31,834 Smash the lock. 1142 01:01:32,042 --> 01:01:33,042 But what with? 1143 01:01:33,209 --> 01:01:35,334 They took my cheese knife! 1144 01:01:35,876 --> 01:01:37,542 My shirt's way too soft. 1145 01:01:37,751 --> 01:01:40,459 We can't escape from here without Arthur. 1146 01:01:40,667 --> 01:01:41,667 Hello! 1147 01:01:43,834 --> 01:01:45,459 Careful! 1148 01:01:57,876 --> 01:01:59,751 Hiya! It's mummy! 1149 01:02:00,167 --> 01:02:01,209 Why's this cow here? 1150 01:02:01,417 --> 01:02:02,459 Keep back, scum! 1151 01:02:02,667 --> 01:02:04,626 I'm freeing my daughters. 1152 01:02:04,834 --> 01:02:08,001 Is your little resistance group booming? 1153 01:02:08,209 --> 01:02:09,251 Yes. 1154 01:02:09,459 --> 01:02:11,001 My wife's with Lancelot. 1155 01:02:11,209 --> 01:02:12,376 I feared you'd yell. 1156 01:02:12,584 --> 01:02:13,584 Lancelot? 1157 01:02:14,001 --> 01:02:15,376 Miss ugly's with Lancelot? 1158 01:02:15,584 --> 01:02:18,834 Girls, bring your comrades to the kitchens. 1159 01:02:19,042 --> 01:02:20,376 - You'll eat. - No, mother! 1160 01:02:20,834 --> 01:02:23,251 In the name of justice, we stay here! 1161 01:02:23,709 --> 01:02:25,501 We'd be more use outside. 1162 01:02:25,709 --> 01:02:27,459 Screw that! We stay here! 1163 01:02:27,876 --> 01:02:30,167 By the way, I'm marrying this guy 1164 01:02:30,376 --> 01:02:32,667 and his family isn't very good! 1165 01:02:32,876 --> 01:02:36,001 Lady myfanwy. A pity about the circumstances... 1166 01:02:36,209 --> 01:02:38,084 - She's a bitch. - Even so. 1167 01:02:38,292 --> 01:02:39,584 I obtained a pardon 1168 01:02:39,792 --> 01:02:40,792 for the youngest, 1169 01:02:40,959 --> 01:02:43,417 but I couldn't help the rest of you. 1170 01:02:43,792 --> 01:02:46,751 I'd choke to death before creepy granny frees me. 1171 01:02:54,876 --> 01:02:58,876 How dare you look at him, woman of such low morals? 1172 01:02:59,084 --> 01:03:00,084 Stand back! 1173 01:03:01,417 --> 01:03:02,417 He has changed. 1174 01:03:04,376 --> 01:03:06,917 Unlike you. As ugly as ever. 1175 01:03:08,334 --> 01:03:11,542 Stop this witch from putting a curse on our king. 1176 01:03:11,751 --> 01:03:13,667 You'll stop nothing, scum! 1177 01:03:13,876 --> 01:03:15,292 Your king's bleeding. 1178 01:03:15,709 --> 01:03:16,876 And he's feverish. 1179 01:03:17,876 --> 01:03:19,167 Shall I open the cage? 1180 01:03:19,376 --> 01:03:20,459 No, leave it. 1181 01:03:21,126 --> 01:03:22,792 Let him die in it. 1182 01:03:24,626 --> 01:03:25,959 At his own pace. 1183 01:03:27,876 --> 01:03:31,584 How can you be so heartless towards someone you loved? 1184 01:03:32,167 --> 01:03:33,167 It's easy. 1185 01:03:33,709 --> 01:03:36,709 How come no one ever iced this bitch? 1186 01:03:36,917 --> 01:03:39,292 No regrets, girls? Backing the losers? 1187 01:03:39,667 --> 01:03:42,001 - Screw you! - Madam, it was a pleasure. 1188 01:03:46,542 --> 01:03:49,167 Ugly cow! 1189 01:03:50,709 --> 01:03:51,834 Well then? 1190 01:03:52,042 --> 01:03:53,751 If they find the hole, we're screwed. 1191 01:03:53,959 --> 01:03:55,501 Got a spell for the lock? 1192 01:03:55,709 --> 01:03:57,501 I don't do spells underground! 1193 01:03:58,042 --> 01:03:59,542 Nor out in the open! 1194 01:03:59,751 --> 01:04:01,167 What about this? 1195 01:04:03,417 --> 01:04:04,417 Where's that from? 1196 01:04:04,584 --> 01:04:07,084 I filched it from that dumb guard. 1197 01:04:09,334 --> 01:04:10,876 See that, chums? 1198 01:04:11,084 --> 01:04:13,292 Who's the gang's cretin now? 1199 01:04:13,501 --> 01:04:14,584 I have a talent! 1200 01:04:14,792 --> 01:04:16,292 I'm ok, my dad has money. 1201 01:04:16,501 --> 01:04:17,542 I can cast a spell. 1202 01:04:17,751 --> 01:04:18,751 You never cast it! 1203 01:04:18,959 --> 01:04:20,501 Damn lock! 1204 01:04:20,709 --> 01:04:21,709 Hurry it up! 1205 01:04:21,876 --> 01:04:23,417 The guard will miss his key. 1206 01:04:23,626 --> 01:04:26,834 I refuse to use a spell from my traitor of a father! 1207 01:04:27,042 --> 01:04:28,417 A traitor who lives here. 1208 01:04:28,626 --> 01:04:30,084 Petrok, quiet! 1209 01:04:30,292 --> 01:04:32,042 - Who's his father? - Lot of orkney! 1210 01:04:32,251 --> 01:04:34,251 - Iagu! - Yes, he's a traitor. 1211 01:04:34,459 --> 01:04:35,501 A lousy brigand! 1212 01:04:36,751 --> 01:04:37,751 Let's split! 1213 01:04:37,834 --> 01:04:38,834 Move it! 1214 01:04:39,042 --> 01:04:40,042 Gently! 1215 01:04:40,084 --> 01:04:41,251 We'll free everyone, 1216 01:04:41,459 --> 01:04:43,376 but kings first, then yokels. 1217 01:04:46,542 --> 01:04:48,584 Hurry, the guards will be back! 1218 01:04:49,542 --> 01:04:50,626 What's going on? 1219 01:04:50,834 --> 01:04:51,834 Can we let go? 1220 01:04:51,959 --> 01:04:53,792 Let go of what? Are you nuts? 1221 01:04:54,001 --> 01:04:56,376 - He's heavy! - Haul him up, idiots! 1222 01:04:56,584 --> 01:04:57,626 We haul him up? 1223 01:04:57,834 --> 01:04:58,834 What a pain... 1224 01:04:59,042 --> 01:05:00,042 Back in the cage? 1225 01:05:00,167 --> 01:05:02,167 By his feet, cretins! 1226 01:05:02,376 --> 01:05:04,501 Isn't by the hole better? 1227 01:05:04,709 --> 01:05:05,709 Haul him up! 1228 01:05:11,417 --> 01:05:12,626 The cells are all empty! 1229 01:05:12,834 --> 01:05:15,126 - We collapse it? - Collapse what? 1230 01:05:15,334 --> 01:05:17,501 If we don't, they'll find our hq. 1231 01:05:17,917 --> 01:05:19,584 What a gang of pillocks! 1232 01:05:19,792 --> 01:05:21,917 The tunnel from hq to kaamelott 1233 01:05:22,126 --> 01:05:24,001 may not lead back to hq. 1234 01:05:24,209 --> 01:05:25,376 Collapse it! 1235 01:05:25,584 --> 01:05:26,584 Let's go! 1236 01:05:34,667 --> 01:05:36,334 Find him! 1237 01:05:38,584 --> 01:05:41,501 Or I'll hang you by your privates. 1238 01:05:41,709 --> 01:05:43,876 Bravo! Very constructive. 1239 01:05:44,084 --> 01:05:45,084 Why are you here? 1240 01:05:45,209 --> 01:05:46,959 You dally while he flees! 1241 01:05:47,167 --> 01:05:48,376 We have to find him? 1242 01:05:48,584 --> 01:05:50,209 They collapsed their tunnel. 1243 01:05:50,417 --> 01:05:52,084 We're not hands-on. 1244 01:05:52,501 --> 01:05:54,876 Nor brainy, not that I said so... 1245 01:05:55,084 --> 01:05:58,792 The prospect of being hung by the nuts 1246 01:05:59,001 --> 01:06:01,334 is an incentive to move our arses. 1247 01:06:01,542 --> 01:06:04,001 Argumentum bacu/inum. Might is right. 1248 01:06:04,209 --> 01:06:07,959 Drat, it's both correct and apt. 1249 01:06:08,167 --> 01:06:10,084 Instead, we'll opt for 1250 01:06:10,292 --> 01:06:12,042 de/enda carthago. 1251 01:06:12,584 --> 01:06:15,792 "Carthage must be destroyed", which is just dumb. 1252 01:06:16,001 --> 01:06:18,001 Should we go hunting again? 1253 01:06:18,209 --> 01:06:22,001 Horsa! If we hunt, we need money or land. 1254 01:06:22,209 --> 01:06:23,751 Enough of it! 1255 01:06:23,959 --> 01:06:26,001 You won't get half the realm 1256 01:06:26,209 --> 01:06:29,584 for searching three bushes and finding nothing! 1257 01:06:29,792 --> 01:06:31,542 I'll give you all you want, 1258 01:06:31,751 --> 01:06:33,167 but you leave now. 1259 01:06:33,376 --> 01:06:34,376 Right now! 1260 01:06:34,584 --> 01:06:36,042 What? Whatever they want? 1261 01:06:36,251 --> 01:06:38,292 That's a hasty reaction 1262 01:06:38,501 --> 01:06:39,834 and that's never good. 1263 01:06:40,042 --> 01:06:42,251 Don't act like you're bonkers! 1264 01:06:42,459 --> 01:06:44,084 - Give guarantees. - Wulfstan! 1265 01:06:45,917 --> 01:06:48,376 First, find Arthur. 1266 01:06:50,292 --> 01:06:51,917 For the money... 1267 01:06:52,126 --> 01:06:54,459 We'll work it out later. 1268 01:07:02,084 --> 01:07:03,084 Stop! 1269 01:07:04,167 --> 01:07:05,334 I can't go on. 1270 01:07:05,542 --> 01:07:06,542 My poor back. 1271 01:07:06,626 --> 01:07:07,834 That way. 1272 01:07:08,042 --> 01:07:09,126 Then straight on. 1273 01:07:12,709 --> 01:07:15,167 I think some of them got lost in the tunnels. 1274 01:07:15,376 --> 01:07:17,501 You were hiding here? 1275 01:07:17,709 --> 01:07:18,917 Affirmative. 1276 01:07:19,126 --> 01:07:20,376 Surprised, ducky? 1277 01:07:20,584 --> 01:07:22,251 I'm quite speechless. 1278 01:07:22,667 --> 01:07:24,417 - Do you have weapons? - No. 1279 01:07:24,626 --> 01:07:26,001 No need, a new technique. 1280 01:07:26,209 --> 01:07:28,876 We wear bright clothes to look venomous. 1281 01:07:29,084 --> 01:07:31,334 If you want weapons, I know a spot 1282 01:07:31,542 --> 01:07:32,917 with a weapon in a stone. 1283 01:07:33,417 --> 01:07:34,417 Hervé de rinel? 1284 01:07:37,834 --> 01:07:39,001 Where did you come from? 1285 01:07:39,209 --> 01:07:40,209 The jails. 1286 01:07:42,709 --> 01:07:44,959 I followed people through a hole. 1287 01:07:45,167 --> 01:07:46,167 Should I go back? 1288 01:07:48,459 --> 01:07:50,376 Why not show yourself earlier? 1289 01:07:50,834 --> 01:07:52,126 I'm not the showy type. 1290 01:07:53,001 --> 01:07:54,292 Stop! 1291 01:07:55,709 --> 01:07:57,167 What the hell? 1292 01:08:00,417 --> 01:08:02,459 Who the hell is he? 1293 01:08:02,876 --> 01:08:03,876 For my quest. 1294 01:08:03,959 --> 01:08:05,876 - What quest? - To be a knight. 1295 01:08:06,084 --> 01:08:07,542 So you kill king Arthur? 1296 01:08:07,751 --> 01:08:09,376 The man who can make you a knight? 1297 01:08:09,584 --> 01:08:11,334 - It's the law. - Killing the king? 1298 01:08:11,542 --> 01:08:13,751 - Are we pea-brains? Your name! - Kolaig! 1299 01:08:13,959 --> 01:08:15,167 Not your trade! 1300 01:08:15,376 --> 01:08:16,167 My name's kolaig! 1301 01:08:16,376 --> 01:08:19,417 "He who desires a knight's wife must kill that knight." 1302 01:08:20,042 --> 01:08:22,126 You desire a knight's wife? 1303 01:08:22,334 --> 01:08:23,584 King Arthur's. 1304 01:08:27,209 --> 01:08:30,542 I'm not a king, nor a knight and I have no wife. 1305 01:08:31,209 --> 01:08:32,251 Guinevere isn't your wife? 1306 01:08:32,459 --> 01:08:34,126 It's not that simple. 1307 01:08:34,334 --> 01:08:36,459 I mustn't kill you then. 1308 01:08:36,667 --> 01:08:38,792 - Sorry. - We are too, young patriot. 1309 01:08:39,001 --> 01:08:41,001 Do 16,500 push-ups, 8,000 lunges, 1310 01:08:41,209 --> 01:08:42,501 a fruit juice break, 1311 01:08:42,709 --> 01:08:44,917 - then 16,500 more push-ups. - Wait. 1312 01:08:46,959 --> 01:08:49,959 Do you know where Guinevere is? 1313 01:08:50,167 --> 01:08:50,959 Of course. 1314 01:08:51,167 --> 01:08:53,501 I ended up in jail because I know. 1315 01:08:54,042 --> 01:08:58,042 Lancelot keeps her in an old, uncharted and ruined tower. 1316 01:08:58,251 --> 01:08:59,709 I send letters in cakes 1317 01:08:59,917 --> 01:09:02,834 cos the kaamelott pastry chef fancies my sister. 1318 01:09:03,042 --> 01:09:05,001 - This is great, sire! - Shut up. 1319 01:09:05,209 --> 01:09:08,751 - Sire, it's classy. - Enough! And don't call me sire. 1320 01:09:08,959 --> 01:09:10,042 We have a mission. 1321 01:09:10,251 --> 01:09:12,209 - Like in round table days. - You missed it. 1322 01:09:17,084 --> 01:09:17,876 Sorry, sire. 1323 01:09:18,084 --> 01:09:20,167 Shut up! The guards will spot us. 1324 01:09:20,376 --> 01:09:22,459 There are three today for once. 1325 01:09:22,667 --> 01:09:24,417 There are five of us. Who cares? 1326 01:09:26,334 --> 01:09:28,876 Six, counting you. Yeah, ok. 1327 01:09:29,667 --> 01:09:31,167 - What? - I see four. 1328 01:09:31,376 --> 01:09:33,459 It all depends on how you count. 1329 01:09:33,667 --> 01:09:35,501 How long has she been held? 1330 01:09:35,709 --> 01:09:38,334 The pastry chef has sent cakes for several years. 1331 01:09:38,959 --> 01:09:40,084 Several years? 1332 01:09:40,501 --> 01:09:41,542 What do we do? 1333 01:09:41,751 --> 01:09:44,376 Start with the three prats, maybe? 1334 01:09:45,042 --> 01:09:46,042 You mean us? 1335 01:09:47,292 --> 01:09:48,292 Them, moron! 1336 01:09:48,376 --> 01:09:49,792 We'll pulverize them! 1337 01:09:50,001 --> 01:09:51,917 Don't lay into them like mad. 1338 01:09:52,126 --> 01:09:53,292 Just keep them here. 1339 01:09:53,501 --> 01:09:56,251 We have a new technique, without weapons. 1340 01:09:56,459 --> 01:09:58,626 We talk them into submission. 1341 01:09:59,917 --> 01:10:01,292 How do you alert her? 1342 01:10:01,501 --> 01:10:03,376 When the guard changes, I throw gravel. 1343 01:10:04,001 --> 01:10:05,042 I'll go. 1344 01:10:05,584 --> 01:10:07,626 No! What's he doing? No! 1345 01:10:36,209 --> 01:10:38,126 Happy? They'll sound the alert. 1346 01:10:38,334 --> 01:10:39,334 I warned you! 1347 01:10:40,626 --> 01:10:41,959 We leave? 1348 01:10:42,167 --> 01:10:44,209 Maybe not now. But we move it. 1349 01:10:46,292 --> 01:10:47,917 You're using the door? 1350 01:10:48,334 --> 01:10:49,459 What else? 1351 01:10:49,959 --> 01:10:52,667 I have to climb up using the creeper. 1352 01:10:52,876 --> 01:10:54,876 - Why? - It's my first time. 1353 01:10:55,084 --> 01:10:56,376 My quest for my love. 1354 01:10:56,584 --> 01:10:57,626 There's a creeper. 1355 01:10:57,834 --> 01:11:00,042 I won't use the stairs like a loser. 1356 01:11:05,126 --> 01:11:07,292 - Is it you, my friend? - Yes, my love! 1357 01:11:07,501 --> 01:11:08,542 What a thrill! 1358 01:11:08,751 --> 01:11:09,959 I'm here to free you. 1359 01:11:10,667 --> 01:11:11,667 Free me? 1360 01:11:11,709 --> 01:11:13,042 Heavens, can that be? 1361 01:11:15,959 --> 01:11:18,126 Did you hear that? Free me! 1362 01:11:18,334 --> 01:11:19,334 We leave at last! 1363 01:11:19,751 --> 01:11:21,751 I haven't packed madam's bags. 1364 01:11:22,126 --> 01:11:23,126 I don't care. 1365 01:11:23,292 --> 01:11:25,751 Just take my suitor's messages. 1366 01:11:26,167 --> 01:11:27,501 My saviour! 1367 01:11:27,709 --> 01:11:28,709 Nearly there! 1368 01:11:34,751 --> 01:11:37,459 Sorry to spoil things, but it's taking too long. 1369 01:11:37,667 --> 01:11:39,292 They'll be back with others. 1370 01:11:39,501 --> 01:11:40,292 I'll hurry. 1371 01:11:40,501 --> 01:11:41,792 Shit, this is tough. 1372 01:11:42,001 --> 01:11:43,751 - Take the stairs. - No! 1373 01:11:45,126 --> 01:11:47,126 There's a door to break down. 1374 01:11:47,334 --> 01:11:49,792 You can't bring Guinevere down this way. 1375 01:11:50,167 --> 01:11:52,709 Can you take the stairs and pick the lock? 1376 01:11:52,917 --> 01:11:54,751 It'll save time. 1377 01:11:56,584 --> 01:11:57,376 What a thrill! 1378 01:11:57,584 --> 01:12:00,042 Madam realizes I can't give her privacy? 1379 01:12:00,251 --> 01:12:02,209 I'm locked in here too. 1380 01:12:09,792 --> 01:12:11,334 My love? 1381 01:12:11,542 --> 01:12:14,667 No. Stand back. We're breaking the door down. 1382 01:12:14,876 --> 01:12:17,876 My god! Am I dreaming? 1383 01:12:18,084 --> 01:12:19,084 That voice... 1384 01:12:19,209 --> 01:12:21,959 Yes, it's me. Is anyone behind the door? 1385 01:12:24,292 --> 01:12:25,501 - Go on then. - Me? 1386 01:12:25,709 --> 01:12:27,876 Please. My good shoulder is shot. 1387 01:12:28,251 --> 01:12:29,459 Go on. 1388 01:12:46,167 --> 01:12:48,334 - Ok, stand aside. - But, sire... 1389 01:12:54,251 --> 01:12:56,584 You're alive! I knew it. 1390 01:12:56,792 --> 01:12:58,209 I just knew it. 1391 01:12:58,417 --> 01:13:01,667 Madam, your suitor has moved a foot or two. 1392 01:13:01,876 --> 01:13:02,667 Downwards. 1393 01:13:02,876 --> 01:13:03,667 Oh, yes. 1394 01:13:03,876 --> 01:13:06,959 Forgive me, I realize this may be awkward, 1395 01:13:07,167 --> 01:13:09,876 but I happen to be awaiting... 1396 01:13:10,084 --> 01:13:10,876 That's ok. 1397 01:13:11,084 --> 01:13:13,126 I did the door in case the guards return. 1398 01:13:13,334 --> 01:13:15,959 If you have to leave fast, take the stairs. 1399 01:13:16,167 --> 01:13:17,751 Thank you. Sorry. 1400 01:13:17,959 --> 01:13:19,376 It's all right. 1401 01:13:19,834 --> 01:13:23,667 I'll take this opportunity to go down too. 1402 01:13:24,209 --> 01:13:25,959 If ever madam... 1403 01:13:30,292 --> 01:13:31,334 Right. 1404 01:13:32,001 --> 01:13:35,251 Stand 200 steps along the path in case anyone comes. 1405 01:13:35,584 --> 01:13:36,834 On the path? 1406 01:13:38,209 --> 01:13:39,792 Go 200 steps along it 1407 01:13:40,001 --> 01:13:42,001 - and stand guard. - If no one comes, we come back. 1408 01:13:43,876 --> 01:13:46,792 No. Stand guard in case anyone comes. 1409 01:13:47,001 --> 01:13:48,209 If no one does? 1410 01:13:48,417 --> 01:13:50,834 If no one comes, good. Stand guard. 1411 01:13:51,042 --> 01:13:52,334 That changes nothing. 1412 01:13:52,542 --> 01:13:53,834 Can't we stand guard here? 1413 01:13:55,251 --> 01:13:56,709 Go 200 steps first. 1414 01:13:56,917 --> 01:13:59,084 Wasn't it in case anyone comes? 1415 01:13:59,292 --> 01:14:01,084 What if one stays here? 1416 01:14:01,292 --> 01:14:04,042 No one stays here. Go 200 steps along the path. 1417 01:14:04,251 --> 01:14:05,417 Oh, right! 1418 01:14:06,001 --> 01:14:07,001 And stand guard. 1419 01:14:07,126 --> 01:14:09,751 - In case anyone comes. - In case... yes. 1420 01:14:09,959 --> 01:14:12,334 But stand guard anyway. 1421 01:14:12,542 --> 01:14:13,709 Even if no one comes. 1422 01:14:13,917 --> 01:14:15,667 - Don't come back. - Ok. 1423 01:14:18,417 --> 01:14:19,417 Go on. 1424 01:14:21,209 --> 01:14:22,209 Well? 1425 01:14:22,417 --> 01:14:25,126 You prefer me to start? That's fine by me. 1426 01:14:25,542 --> 01:14:27,751 - Go 200 steps. - Together? 1427 01:14:27,959 --> 01:14:28,959 That's it. 1428 01:14:29,042 --> 01:14:30,501 - After that... - There! 1429 01:14:30,709 --> 01:14:31,501 We come back. 1430 01:14:31,709 --> 01:14:33,709 - No, stand guard. - Ah, ok! 1431 01:14:33,917 --> 01:14:37,042 If no one comes, we do 200 more, all the way to the sea. 1432 01:14:41,834 --> 01:14:44,626 - Can you manage, my friend? - Coming, my love. 1433 01:14:45,251 --> 01:14:46,667 This is too tough. 1434 01:14:46,876 --> 01:14:48,334 It's full of thorns! 1435 01:14:48,542 --> 01:14:49,542 Hurry up now. 1436 01:14:49,667 --> 01:14:52,001 We can't hang about. We iced a Saxon. 1437 01:14:52,209 --> 01:14:53,209 I give up. 1438 01:14:53,292 --> 01:14:54,917 I'm on the wrong quest. 1439 01:14:55,501 --> 01:14:56,959 What's that? Give up? 1440 01:14:57,167 --> 01:14:58,876 I'll become a knight another way. 1441 01:14:59,084 --> 01:15:00,292 Aren't you in love? 1442 01:15:00,959 --> 01:15:02,042 Well... 1443 01:15:02,251 --> 01:15:03,251 Why not, 1444 01:15:03,376 --> 01:15:06,292 but I think I got a bit carried away. 1445 01:15:06,501 --> 01:15:08,959 For me, a good quest would be more... 1446 01:15:14,417 --> 01:15:17,417 Tell her no one's climbing up and to come down. 1447 01:15:17,626 --> 01:15:18,751 We're splitting. 1448 01:15:18,959 --> 01:15:20,001 No more lover? 1449 01:15:20,834 --> 01:15:23,376 No more lover... I don't know. Maybe. 1450 01:15:23,584 --> 01:15:26,084 We'll see. In any case, he'll be less... 1451 01:15:26,292 --> 01:15:27,292 Move! 1452 01:16:14,251 --> 01:16:15,709 Who are these idlers? 1453 01:16:15,917 --> 01:16:17,251 What are they up to? 1454 01:16:17,876 --> 01:16:19,751 Excalibur! 1455 01:16:20,292 --> 01:16:21,501 Forged on site! 1456 01:16:21,709 --> 01:16:24,792 The sword of kings forged near the stone of gods. 1457 01:16:25,001 --> 01:16:26,126 Just handfuls left. 1458 01:16:30,542 --> 01:16:34,084 The great Merlin will command the wind and lightning. 1459 01:16:34,292 --> 01:16:36,459 Hey, lads! Wooden figurines? 1460 01:16:36,667 --> 01:16:39,709 I have Arthur, Lancelot, Merlin, Guinevere... 1461 01:16:39,917 --> 01:16:42,542 Excalibur, the herb tea of the gods. 1462 01:16:42,751 --> 01:16:45,751 A miracle cure for gas and ingrown nails. 1463 01:16:45,959 --> 01:16:49,126 As well as for dental pain and flat feet. 1464 01:16:52,042 --> 01:16:54,709 Keep away from the stone. They'll chase you off. 1465 01:16:57,709 --> 01:16:58,876 You can't go any further. 1466 01:16:59,084 --> 01:17:00,292 The sky will turn dark 1467 01:17:00,501 --> 01:17:03,042 and a divine wind will strike kaamelott 1468 01:17:03,251 --> 01:17:05,042 down to the distant sea. 1469 01:17:05,251 --> 01:17:08,334 Arthur pendragon sits at the round table and says, 1470 01:17:08,542 --> 01:17:11,459 "friends, this table is like some cheeses. 1471 01:17:11,959 --> 01:17:15,834 We can divide it equally, but it will be hard to grate." 1472 01:17:16,459 --> 01:17:18,001 It's him! 1473 01:17:18,209 --> 01:17:20,209 It's him, it's him! 1474 01:17:21,876 --> 01:17:22,959 Who's she? 1475 01:17:23,167 --> 01:17:24,959 The lady of the lake. 1476 01:17:25,167 --> 01:17:26,876 Isn't she invisible? 1477 01:17:27,084 --> 01:17:29,792 I've been banished, you dicks! Banished! 1478 01:17:30,001 --> 01:17:32,709 Because this guy refused the mission 1479 01:17:32,917 --> 01:17:34,459 entrusted by the gods. 1480 01:17:34,667 --> 01:17:36,876 It's why you're here, isn't it? 1481 01:17:37,751 --> 01:17:38,876 It is, actually. 1482 01:17:39,084 --> 01:17:40,584 I thought I could try... 1483 01:17:40,792 --> 01:17:42,959 Yes, you're going to try! 1484 01:17:43,167 --> 01:17:45,209 And don't chicken out, ok? 1485 01:17:45,417 --> 01:17:46,751 Only... 1486 01:17:47,459 --> 01:17:49,334 What's going on here? 1487 01:17:49,542 --> 01:17:52,126 What's all this about? 1488 01:17:57,417 --> 01:17:58,667 What's he doing here? 1489 01:18:01,667 --> 01:18:03,626 Halt, ill-advised peasants! 1490 01:18:03,834 --> 01:18:06,876 Turn back now or you'll be shaken. 1491 01:18:07,084 --> 01:18:08,084 Not stirred. 1492 01:18:08,251 --> 01:18:09,376 Don't you recognize me? 1493 01:18:09,917 --> 01:18:11,001 Make an effort. 1494 01:18:13,292 --> 01:18:16,292 I cross my fingers and many people's paths. 1495 01:18:16,501 --> 01:18:18,417 The stone of gods is off limits. 1496 01:18:18,626 --> 01:18:19,751 Turn back or else. 1497 01:18:19,959 --> 01:18:22,417 Why are you here, you swine? 1498 01:18:23,001 --> 01:18:24,667 - You? - Let us by, dickhead. 1499 01:18:24,876 --> 01:18:26,001 No time for wimps. 1500 01:18:26,209 --> 01:18:27,376 You know each other? 1501 01:18:27,584 --> 01:18:28,584 By sight. 1502 01:18:28,626 --> 01:18:30,959 Sir percival is my brother. 1503 01:18:31,501 --> 01:18:32,584 Your brother? 1504 01:18:32,792 --> 01:18:34,834 What? He's my brother, lamorak! 1505 01:18:35,042 --> 01:18:37,376 How come we never saw him before? 1506 01:18:37,584 --> 01:18:39,459 He's no brother, he's a moron. 1507 01:18:39,667 --> 01:18:41,626 My brother is too, but you know him. 1508 01:18:41,834 --> 01:18:43,376 Yours is enough. 1509 01:18:43,584 --> 01:18:44,584 Sire, do we waste him? 1510 01:18:44,751 --> 01:18:45,751 Who do you call sire? 1511 01:18:45,834 --> 01:18:48,709 The only sire here is he who removes Excalibur. 1512 01:18:48,917 --> 01:18:50,292 That's why we came, 1513 01:18:50,501 --> 01:18:52,376 but you block the path with your wimps. 1514 01:18:52,584 --> 01:18:56,292 Only the chosen one can remove Excalibur. 1515 01:18:56,501 --> 01:18:57,501 So why 1516 01:18:57,542 --> 01:18:59,126 stop people from trying? 1517 01:18:59,334 --> 01:19:00,709 In case an unchosen one 1518 01:19:00,917 --> 01:19:02,251 forces it out. 1519 01:19:02,459 --> 01:19:03,626 Lamorak! 1520 01:19:04,167 --> 01:19:05,459 Know what, you dick? 1521 01:19:05,667 --> 01:19:07,042 One pitch, two teams. 1522 01:19:07,251 --> 01:19:08,917 Best of three at robobrole. 1523 01:19:10,084 --> 01:19:12,042 - You can't be serious. - At what? 1524 01:19:12,251 --> 01:19:14,376 Robobrole! It's a Welsh game. 1525 01:19:14,792 --> 01:19:16,334 My brother sucks at it. 1526 01:19:16,542 --> 01:19:18,042 I don't suck at robobrole. 1527 01:19:18,709 --> 01:19:19,959 Even granny said so. 1528 01:19:22,209 --> 01:19:24,792 You want your king Arthur to approach the stone? 1529 01:19:25,001 --> 01:19:26,542 Three rounds. 1530 01:19:26,751 --> 01:19:28,959 If you win, you can try. If you lose, 1531 01:19:29,376 --> 01:19:31,792 you go to the farm to tell dad and mum 1532 01:19:32,001 --> 01:19:33,001 I wiped you out. 1533 01:19:33,167 --> 01:19:34,792 All right. That's good. 1534 01:19:35,001 --> 01:19:36,042 Here's my idea. 1535 01:19:36,251 --> 01:19:38,459 Let me go to the stone and then 1536 01:19:38,667 --> 01:19:40,542 play all the Welsh games you want. 1537 01:19:40,959 --> 01:19:42,376 Stay away from it. 1538 01:19:47,167 --> 01:19:48,584 Unless you win. 1539 01:19:59,667 --> 01:20:01,626 Robobrole in three rounds! 1540 01:20:01,834 --> 01:20:04,084 Not one, not two, three! 1541 01:20:04,292 --> 01:20:05,292 Nine shells. 1542 01:20:05,501 --> 01:20:09,376 We can multiply the brobin by 1, 4, 6, 21 and 3. 1543 01:20:09,584 --> 01:20:11,959 The brobons too, except 4, 6 and 4. 1544 01:20:12,167 --> 01:20:14,292 The brobinle is set at 24 points. 1545 01:20:14,501 --> 01:20:18,417 Three turn-robobrins, winning pass, ratou-robole 1546 01:20:18,626 --> 01:20:22,042 and, for those who are real men, robobrole! 1547 01:20:23,709 --> 01:20:25,501 If anyone scores robobrole... 1548 01:20:25,709 --> 01:20:27,417 Don't count on it, guys. 1549 01:20:27,626 --> 01:20:28,626 Question? 1550 01:20:28,876 --> 01:20:29,876 What isn't clear? 1551 01:20:30,042 --> 01:20:32,834 - Go on? - Is there a ball or anything? 1552 01:20:33,334 --> 01:20:34,667 - Usually, no. - Want one? 1553 01:20:34,876 --> 01:20:36,334 No, count me out. 1554 01:20:36,542 --> 01:20:37,834 A ball changes nothing. 1555 01:20:38,042 --> 01:20:40,209 - The points are what matter. - Bring a ball. 1556 01:20:40,417 --> 01:20:42,376 All right, lads! Here we go! 1557 01:20:47,667 --> 01:20:49,542 Don't let them impress you! 1558 01:20:49,751 --> 01:20:51,751 Fall back to the 21 line. 1559 01:20:56,292 --> 01:20:57,292 There! 1560 01:20:57,667 --> 01:20:59,459 Sire, take 31 players 1561 01:20:59,667 --> 01:21:01,876 and stay 15 feet behind the robourle. 1562 01:21:02,084 --> 01:21:03,542 Stop calling him sire! 1563 01:21:03,751 --> 01:21:04,751 Everyone else, attack! 1564 01:21:04,959 --> 01:21:06,876 Boubin, broube, roubou to six. 1565 01:21:07,084 --> 01:21:08,501 Go on, get stuck in! 1566 01:21:10,084 --> 01:21:12,334 You said 31 players? There are five of us. 1567 01:21:12,542 --> 01:21:15,084 Don't quibble. It's not the round table. 1568 01:21:15,292 --> 01:21:16,584 Play! 1569 01:21:33,334 --> 01:21:34,542 Drop the ball for a brobinle. 1570 01:21:34,751 --> 01:21:35,792 24 points in one go. 1571 01:21:44,792 --> 01:21:46,667 Some people think too much. 1572 01:21:57,084 --> 01:21:59,459 Sire, forget the ball. It's not important. 1573 01:21:59,667 --> 01:22:00,667 So what do I do? 1574 01:22:00,876 --> 01:22:02,001 You win points! 1575 01:22:02,417 --> 01:22:03,501 Play for points! 1576 01:22:04,084 --> 01:22:05,876 16! Aline of 16. 1577 01:22:06,084 --> 01:22:08,417 Where? You're four shells down. 1578 01:22:10,917 --> 01:22:11,917 Seven. 1579 01:22:14,251 --> 01:22:15,251 Three. 1580 01:22:17,001 --> 01:22:18,876 Robourle! Sound the horn. 1581 01:22:19,084 --> 01:22:20,334 Robourle or roubourle? 1582 01:22:20,542 --> 01:22:22,209 Robourle, not roubourle. 1583 01:22:22,417 --> 01:22:24,126 No robourle. 1584 01:22:26,751 --> 01:22:28,417 That's no robourle. 1585 01:22:30,084 --> 01:22:31,126 That'll teach you. 1586 01:22:34,542 --> 01:22:37,334 Make the most of the bobrol-roubrelo-crobrocres! 1587 01:22:37,542 --> 01:22:39,501 We won't get another chance like it! 1588 01:22:58,834 --> 01:23:00,001 What a pain! 1589 01:23:04,376 --> 01:23:07,042 What? Does that count as a foul? 1590 01:23:07,251 --> 01:23:08,251 Robobrole! 1591 01:23:08,459 --> 01:23:09,459 Unbelievable! 1592 01:23:09,667 --> 01:23:10,667 What now? 1593 01:23:10,709 --> 01:23:12,501 Robobrole! We win! 1594 01:23:12,709 --> 01:23:13,792 You've played before. 1595 01:23:14,001 --> 01:23:15,042 I haven't. 1596 01:23:15,251 --> 01:23:18,667 If I'd kneed one in the nuts, we'd have won right away? 1597 01:23:18,876 --> 01:23:21,042 No, sire. Robobrole is more than kneeing. 1598 01:23:21,251 --> 01:23:23,459 Can he pull the sword out now? 1599 01:23:24,001 --> 01:23:25,292 He can try anyhow. 1600 01:25:58,376 --> 01:25:59,417 I raise my horn, 1601 01:25:59,626 --> 01:26:02,792 a horn full of disgustingly bad plonk. 1602 01:26:03,001 --> 01:26:04,501 Even worse than usual. 1603 01:26:04,709 --> 01:26:07,376 Lancelot bans imported wines. It's local. 1604 01:26:07,584 --> 01:26:09,501 Just saying it's bad. 1605 01:26:09,709 --> 01:26:11,959 I drink to my daughter's return 1606 01:26:12,167 --> 01:26:14,126 and the accursed nitwit thought dead 1607 01:26:14,334 --> 01:26:15,334 who freed her. 1608 01:26:20,876 --> 01:26:23,292 What about our resurrected champions? 1609 01:26:23,501 --> 01:26:25,917 We'd got used to you being dead. 1610 01:26:26,126 --> 01:26:28,667 Not me, but I have no idea who you are. 1611 01:26:28,876 --> 01:26:31,751 You can say we founded what people call 1612 01:26:31,959 --> 01:26:32,959 the arthurian age. 1613 01:26:33,084 --> 01:26:33,876 We did it all. 1614 01:26:34,084 --> 01:26:35,459 We set up britain. 1615 01:26:35,667 --> 01:26:38,001 The Navy. The metal industry. The spice trade. 1616 01:26:38,209 --> 01:26:39,209 Before, with a cut, 1617 01:26:39,417 --> 01:26:40,417 you'd rot away. 1618 01:26:40,501 --> 01:26:41,876 With Arthur, you got care. 1619 01:26:42,084 --> 01:26:43,667 750,000 health centres. 1620 01:26:43,876 --> 01:26:45,501 - Who did that? - Artour! 1621 01:26:46,042 --> 01:26:46,834 What? 1622 01:26:47,042 --> 01:26:48,959 The chicken is spectacular! 1623 01:26:50,542 --> 01:26:52,001 Why is he here exactly? 1624 01:26:52,209 --> 01:26:53,376 It's touchy. 1625 01:26:53,876 --> 01:26:55,376 Is my guest a problem? 1626 01:26:55,834 --> 01:26:56,876 Guests can be dismissed. 1627 01:26:57,084 --> 01:26:59,126 By order of arrival, he won't be dismissed first. 1628 01:26:59,626 --> 01:27:01,376 Fine, but why is he here? 1629 01:27:01,584 --> 01:27:02,667 Your father's whim. 1630 01:27:02,876 --> 01:27:03,876 A sort of fancy. 1631 01:27:03,917 --> 01:27:06,001 That lump arrived with his weirdos... 1632 01:27:06,209 --> 01:27:07,209 To besiege us. 1633 01:27:07,251 --> 01:27:08,542 Who's telling this? 1634 01:27:08,751 --> 01:27:12,542 We're feeding a guy who came to put arrows in our derrieres! 1635 01:27:12,751 --> 01:27:15,834 The siege failed and your father, bam! 1636 01:27:16,042 --> 01:27:18,501 For some reason, he set them up on our land 1637 01:27:18,709 --> 01:27:21,459 with war machines, tents and the works. 1638 01:27:21,667 --> 01:27:23,042 I don't regret it. 1639 01:27:23,251 --> 01:27:25,876 What if the saxons raid and find their arsenal? 1640 01:27:26,292 --> 01:27:28,334 Do you think they'll show understanding? 1641 01:27:28,542 --> 01:27:32,292 If the saxons raid, we're all dead. 1642 01:27:32,501 --> 01:27:33,501 They're not our towers. 1643 01:27:33,667 --> 01:27:36,417 Towers are banned, yours or others'. 1644 01:27:36,626 --> 01:27:37,959 They'll seize them. 1645 01:27:38,167 --> 01:27:41,417 Before they do that, can't we try something? 1646 01:27:41,626 --> 01:27:44,501 You imagine you gave me the idea, perhaps? 1647 01:27:44,709 --> 01:27:47,001 We don't have one crossbowman left! 1648 01:27:47,209 --> 01:27:49,251 And theirs can't be trained. 1649 01:27:49,459 --> 01:27:50,667 Anyone can be trained. 1650 01:27:50,876 --> 01:27:51,917 No, not them. 1651 01:27:52,126 --> 01:27:54,251 Can't you do that? 1652 01:27:54,792 --> 01:27:56,167 What can't I do? 1653 01:27:56,376 --> 01:27:59,792 Train troops, do sieges, all that. 1654 01:28:00,001 --> 01:28:01,042 Didn't you do it once? 1655 01:28:01,251 --> 01:28:03,084 Yes, but I didn't train morons. 1656 01:28:03,292 --> 01:28:05,792 Well, I did, but not this moronic. 1657 01:28:15,417 --> 01:28:16,667 Along with... 1658 01:28:19,501 --> 01:28:21,709 Their machines get piled up. 1659 01:28:21,917 --> 01:28:24,834 It takes three days to untangle everything. 1660 01:28:25,042 --> 01:28:26,542 I spent two weeks 1661 01:28:26,751 --> 01:28:28,376 yelling my lungs out 1662 01:28:28,584 --> 01:28:31,126 and never got two to march side by side. 1663 01:28:31,334 --> 01:28:32,709 They can't be trained. 1664 01:28:46,001 --> 01:28:47,542 What are you up to? 1665 01:28:47,751 --> 01:28:49,376 You gave me a fright. 1666 01:28:49,584 --> 01:28:50,917 You're taking off? 1667 01:28:51,417 --> 01:28:55,084 If I'm wearing a cape, that means I'm taking off? 1668 01:28:55,292 --> 01:28:56,876 You're not taking off? 1669 01:28:57,751 --> 01:29:02,001 I am. But if I say where, you'll only yell. 1670 01:29:02,751 --> 01:29:04,959 I'm likely not to give a damn, 1671 01:29:05,167 --> 01:29:07,084 but tell me and we'll see. 1672 01:29:08,084 --> 01:29:10,751 I forgot something at the tower. 1673 01:29:11,501 --> 01:29:13,751 The tower? The ban ruins? 1674 01:29:13,959 --> 01:29:17,917 Yes. In the rush, when things always have to go fast, 1675 01:29:18,126 --> 01:29:20,542 I thought I got everything, but I didn't. 1676 01:29:20,751 --> 01:29:24,751 You're going to the ban ruins now? A four-hour walk? 1677 01:29:25,376 --> 01:29:27,417 Four? I thought it was three. 1678 01:29:27,959 --> 01:29:29,751 By day. It's four at night. 1679 01:29:29,959 --> 01:29:33,876 Hold on, you can't leave for ban now. Be serious. 1680 01:29:34,084 --> 01:29:37,626 I forgot my crown of flowers, so I'm fetching it. 1681 01:29:37,834 --> 01:29:39,126 Your crown of flowers? 1682 01:29:39,334 --> 01:29:41,042 Who cares about that? 1683 01:29:41,251 --> 01:29:44,459 We save you and you go back? Are you crazy? 1684 01:29:44,667 --> 01:29:48,876 If you freed me to stop me from moving freely, why bother? 1685 01:29:49,084 --> 01:29:50,501 I'm not stopping you. 1686 01:29:50,709 --> 01:29:53,876 I'm going to get my crown of flowers. 1687 01:29:54,084 --> 01:29:57,001 It's not my crown of flowers, it's yours. 1688 01:29:57,209 --> 01:29:59,917 My crown of flowers? No, I don't have one. 1689 01:30:00,626 --> 01:30:03,834 The one you wore on our wedding day. 1690 01:30:04,042 --> 01:30:07,334 It's not as important for you since you never care 1691 01:30:07,542 --> 01:30:10,584 as for me who gets soppy about symbols. 1692 01:30:10,792 --> 01:30:13,167 I'll add that it's a lucky charm 1693 01:30:13,376 --> 01:30:15,501 that, I've been told, 1694 01:30:15,709 --> 01:30:18,334 provided you with security and Serenity 1695 01:30:18,542 --> 01:30:20,501 as long as I had it with me. 1696 01:30:20,709 --> 01:30:23,251 It ensured me security and Serenity? 1697 01:30:23,459 --> 01:30:24,834 It works really well! 1698 01:30:25,042 --> 01:30:29,084 Worth a night hike, risking patrols or famished wolves. 1699 01:30:29,292 --> 01:30:30,542 Come on, let's go! 1700 01:30:30,751 --> 01:30:33,584 I'm going to fetch my crown of flowers. 1701 01:30:37,459 --> 01:30:40,084 Let me change shoes and put on a woolly. 1702 01:30:40,292 --> 01:30:43,251 I'm not asking you anything, my dear. 1703 01:30:43,459 --> 01:30:45,417 You've done so much for me. 1704 01:30:45,626 --> 01:30:47,209 You don't want me to come? 1705 01:30:47,876 --> 01:30:50,876 I do. Yes, I do, please. 1706 01:30:51,834 --> 01:30:53,084 But... 1707 01:30:53,709 --> 01:30:56,834 Don't grumble all the way. 1708 01:31:15,251 --> 01:31:16,251 I love it. 1709 01:31:19,084 --> 01:31:20,292 I just love it! 1710 01:31:21,751 --> 01:31:23,959 I don't get it. 1711 01:31:24,167 --> 01:31:26,959 You can't get them coordinated on a battlefield, 1712 01:31:27,167 --> 01:31:28,542 but this they can do. 1713 01:31:56,667 --> 01:31:58,417 They're dumb, ok, 1714 01:31:58,626 --> 01:32:00,751 but they're good musicians. 1715 01:32:15,626 --> 01:32:17,917 Ok, let's hurry now. 1716 01:32:18,126 --> 01:32:20,459 You're not coming up with me? 1717 01:32:20,834 --> 01:32:22,376 No, I stand guard here. Go on. 1718 01:32:23,917 --> 01:32:24,917 All alone? 1719 01:32:25,042 --> 01:32:26,292 Go on, damn it! 1720 01:32:26,501 --> 01:32:28,917 We can't let a patrol trap us up there. 1721 01:32:29,126 --> 01:32:30,792 I stand guard while you go. 1722 01:32:31,251 --> 01:32:34,001 And don't take a week, ok? Go on. 1723 01:32:44,167 --> 01:32:46,709 - I hear noises! - Hurry it up! 1724 01:37:02,376 --> 01:37:03,376 We send no one? 1725 01:37:03,792 --> 01:37:04,584 Stop asking. 1726 01:37:04,792 --> 01:37:07,126 Sorry, I ask each time. 1727 01:37:07,334 --> 01:37:10,376 You know, we think these are attacks, but maybe 1728 01:37:10,584 --> 01:37:12,834 it's just a tradition for them. 1729 01:37:13,042 --> 01:37:14,084 A show then? 1730 01:37:14,292 --> 01:37:15,876 Should we toss them coins? 1731 01:37:34,334 --> 01:37:35,751 Hear anything? 1732 01:37:35,959 --> 01:37:36,959 Yeah, just now. 1733 01:37:37,084 --> 01:37:40,042 A moronic voice asking, "hear anything?" 1734 01:37:58,959 --> 01:38:00,834 - Drum. - Sure? 1735 01:38:01,042 --> 01:38:03,626 Of course I'm sure. Don't start. Drum! 1736 01:38:04,209 --> 01:38:06,292 - Drum. - Yeah, I got that. 1737 01:38:07,501 --> 01:38:08,917 Drum! 1738 01:38:29,501 --> 01:38:32,001 That's new, they're doing it to music. 1739 01:38:38,709 --> 01:38:40,876 Remember, this self-styled civilization 1740 01:38:41,084 --> 01:38:43,959 has known centuries of in-breeding. 1741 01:38:44,167 --> 01:38:45,917 They're retards. 1742 01:39:53,459 --> 01:39:55,501 What now? Do something fast! 1743 01:39:55,709 --> 01:39:58,959 - We send the lancers? - Too late! They're in place. 1744 01:39:59,167 --> 01:40:01,417 - I don't know. - Then shut up! 1745 01:40:01,626 --> 01:40:03,334 - It's now! - Of course! 1746 01:40:03,542 --> 01:40:04,542 I say no. 1747 01:40:04,709 --> 01:40:05,917 Stop being a wimp. 1748 01:40:06,126 --> 01:40:07,209 You'll ruin it! 1749 01:40:07,417 --> 01:40:08,501 React, damn it! 1750 01:40:08,709 --> 01:40:10,584 Give an order right now! 1751 01:40:10,792 --> 01:40:13,167 An order, you mouldy lizard! 1752 01:40:13,376 --> 01:40:14,792 What's going on down below? 1753 01:40:15,001 --> 01:40:16,417 Lancelot will react. 1754 01:40:16,626 --> 01:40:17,417 I bet it's my dad. 1755 01:40:17,626 --> 01:40:21,417 No, I won't collapse our work for a vague notion. 1756 01:40:21,626 --> 01:40:24,084 - For god's sake! - Want a slap in the face? 1757 01:40:24,292 --> 01:40:25,417 We'll wreck it all! 1758 01:40:25,626 --> 01:40:28,001 It'll hurt, but Arthur ordered it. 1759 01:40:28,209 --> 01:40:31,292 Sure, after ten years, he turns up and says, 1760 01:40:31,501 --> 01:40:32,959 "collapse it all." 1761 01:40:33,167 --> 01:40:34,334 No way! 1762 01:40:35,251 --> 01:40:37,376 Who leaves ropes lying around? 1763 01:41:57,167 --> 01:41:58,334 Get us out, 1764 01:41:58,542 --> 01:42:00,876 instead of just standing there, you maniac! 1765 01:42:01,084 --> 01:42:02,876 A secret passage 1766 01:42:03,084 --> 01:42:05,292 leads from this room. Everyone knows that! 1767 01:42:05,501 --> 01:42:07,626 Only Arthur knew the entrance. 1768 01:42:08,167 --> 01:42:10,584 We're not going to stay stuck in here, 1769 01:42:10,792 --> 01:42:12,501 waiting to die like rats! 1770 01:42:12,709 --> 01:42:15,792 Do you know where that passage is or not? 1771 01:42:27,834 --> 01:42:28,959 You mean this? 1772 01:42:53,334 --> 01:42:54,584 Since we last met, 1773 01:42:54,792 --> 01:42:56,917 you can't have changed much. 1774 01:43:01,167 --> 01:43:03,626 Changed? In relation to what? 1775 01:43:05,001 --> 01:43:06,209 Bravery, honour, dignity. 1776 01:43:06,417 --> 01:43:07,834 Of course not. 1777 01:43:08,459 --> 01:43:10,292 Be gone. Far from here. 1778 01:43:10,959 --> 01:43:13,084 Return to logres and you'll be hanged. 1779 01:43:15,501 --> 01:43:16,501 Sire. 1780 01:43:21,917 --> 01:43:22,917 Hanged? 1781 01:43:24,834 --> 01:43:27,042 You'll hang people? 1782 01:43:32,584 --> 01:43:35,667 You're not very credible as a merciless avenger. 1783 01:43:39,459 --> 01:43:42,126 Explain your plan to your burgundy friends. 1784 01:43:42,334 --> 01:43:45,584 The idiots are destroying your fortress. 1785 01:43:53,042 --> 01:43:55,292 I gave the order to open fire. 1786 01:43:59,334 --> 01:44:00,751 You have Excalibur? 1787 01:44:01,792 --> 01:44:03,626 I hear it's lost its powers, 1788 01:44:03,834 --> 01:44:06,792 that the gods no longer back Arthur pendragon. 1789 01:46:06,542 --> 01:46:08,501 - Let's go. - Everyone in the boats! 1790 01:46:08,709 --> 01:46:12,001 I said we'd reach the trireme by dark, so we will! 1791 01:46:12,209 --> 01:46:13,542 Back to Rome! 1792 01:46:13,751 --> 01:46:15,084 Back to Rome! 1793 01:46:16,376 --> 01:46:17,376 Back to Rome! 1794 01:46:17,542 --> 01:46:19,334 Three years in this dump. 1795 01:46:19,542 --> 01:46:20,893 No more of that maniac yelling at us! 1796 01:46:20,917 --> 01:46:22,376 It won't change. 1797 01:46:28,709 --> 01:46:29,834 Where are you going? 1798 01:46:30,251 --> 01:46:31,251 Arturus! 1799 01:46:32,001 --> 01:46:33,292 What's going on? 1800 01:48:29,292 --> 01:48:30,917 Look. 1801 01:48:31,334 --> 01:48:34,042 By Minerva, what were you doing? 1802 01:48:34,251 --> 01:48:35,626 We nearly left you! 1803 01:48:35,834 --> 01:48:36,834 The tide's turning! 1804 01:48:37,042 --> 01:48:38,376 Climb in now! 1805 01:48:38,584 --> 01:48:39,584 In Rome, 1806 01:48:39,667 --> 01:48:42,126 you'll get three months' latrine duty! 1807 01:48:42,334 --> 01:48:44,084 Come on, row! 1808 01:48:44,292 --> 01:48:45,834 Row! 1809 01:49:19,459 --> 01:49:21,042 You're an incompetent. 1810 01:49:45,126 --> 01:49:46,626 You're an incompetent! 1811 01:51:04,209 --> 01:51:05,459 Sire! 1812 01:51:06,251 --> 01:51:08,042 Why the hell are you here? 1813 01:51:12,917 --> 01:51:14,667 - Sire, are you injured? - Get him out! 1814 01:51:14,876 --> 01:51:16,542 No, I'm fine. 1815 01:51:16,751 --> 01:51:18,542 Couldn't you stay put? 1816 01:51:18,751 --> 01:51:19,792 You'd vanished. 1817 01:51:20,001 --> 01:51:22,209 We ended up finding the tunnel. 1818 01:51:22,417 --> 01:51:24,251 If you're ok, why lie down? 1819 01:51:24,709 --> 01:51:26,251 No reason. Let's get going. 1820 01:51:26,459 --> 01:51:27,459 No reason? 1821 01:51:32,917 --> 01:51:35,251 Let's go before it all collapses on us! 1822 01:52:21,251 --> 01:52:25,834 Isle of thanet, Saxon territory 1823 01:52:44,501 --> 01:52:47,334 - Sire, may I ask something? - Here we go... 1824 01:52:47,876 --> 01:52:49,834 Is thanet theirs or ours now? 1825 01:52:50,042 --> 01:52:50,834 Ours. 1826 01:52:51,042 --> 01:52:52,042 Like wales 1827 01:52:52,251 --> 01:52:55,251 where we demand independence from logres? 1828 01:52:55,459 --> 01:52:58,876 Precisely. I confess I'd like to know. 1829 01:52:59,584 --> 01:53:01,751 - Not independent. - No. 1830 01:53:02,501 --> 01:53:03,667 Not independent? 1831 01:53:04,084 --> 01:53:06,084 You stay under kaamelott's jurisdiction? 1832 01:53:06,292 --> 01:53:07,292 Yes. 1833 01:53:07,376 --> 01:53:08,667 Of course. 1834 01:53:10,126 --> 01:53:12,584 So, thanet is still attached to logres? 1835 01:53:12,792 --> 01:53:14,042 - Yes. - Obviously. 1836 01:53:14,251 --> 01:53:15,917 Everything's fine then. 1837 01:53:17,626 --> 01:53:20,667 I don't understand it all, but it doesn't look so bad. 1838 01:53:20,876 --> 01:53:23,001 On one tiny condition. 1839 01:53:23,209 --> 01:53:24,542 Oh, right. 1840 01:53:25,209 --> 01:53:26,792 If you want money, forget it. 1841 01:53:27,001 --> 01:53:27,792 We're broke. 1842 01:53:28,001 --> 01:53:30,417 We can give you a loan. 1843 01:53:33,917 --> 01:53:36,042 Sire, I deduce 1844 01:53:36,251 --> 01:53:40,417 that you plan to re-establish your famous round table. 1845 01:53:42,626 --> 01:53:43,626 Possibly. 1846 01:53:43,917 --> 01:53:47,876 A round table much bigger than the first, right? 1847 01:53:50,209 --> 01:53:51,209 Possibly. 1848 01:53:52,167 --> 01:53:55,334 Sire, I won't beat about the bush. 1849 01:53:55,542 --> 01:53:58,292 I own an island in the kingdom of logres. 1850 01:53:58,667 --> 01:54:00,459 And I've served kaamelott 1851 01:54:00,667 --> 01:54:04,334 in a loyal manner for many long years... 1852 01:54:10,334 --> 01:54:12,876 I request a permanent seat 1853 01:54:13,084 --> 01:54:15,459 at your new round table. 1854 01:54:18,292 --> 01:54:19,334 Is he serious? 1855 01:54:20,334 --> 01:54:22,751 You can't let this nutter join. 1856 01:54:22,959 --> 01:54:24,917 He can keep his isle. We never went there. 1857 01:54:25,126 --> 01:54:27,792 Logres is sacred and can't be carved up. 1858 01:54:29,251 --> 01:54:30,584 That's true. 1859 01:54:32,876 --> 01:54:34,667 The quest for the grail. 1860 01:54:36,084 --> 01:54:38,459 When do we start? 1861 01:56:38,042 --> 01:56:41,417 Chapter one 1862 01:59:57,292 --> 02:00:00,251 Subtitles: Ian burley 1863 02:00:00,459 --> 02:00:02,459 subtitling: Eclair v&a 112995

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.