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1
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All right.
2
00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:39,199
Thanks for comin' in today
3
00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:41,879
to discuss your daughter's
behavior, m'kay.
4
00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:44,879
Exactly what kind of trouble is
Shelley in, Mr. Mackey?
5
00:00:44,880 --> 00:00:46,879
Well, unfortunately,
we found out
6
00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:49,519
our playground monitor
has been accepting favors
7
00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:52,399
to look the other way at recess
and, uh...
8
00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:55,519
your daughter sent him
an inappropriate picture.
9
00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:57,339
Of her butthole, m'kay.
10
00:00:57,340 --> 00:01:00,339
Her butthole?
Shelley!
11
00:01:00,340 --> 00:01:01,417
Why would the recess monitor
12
00:01:02,340 --> 00:01:03,339
want a picture
of my daughter's butthole?!
13
00:01:03,340 --> 00:01:06,339
We've been having
a lot of issues at the school
14
00:01:06,340 --> 00:01:08,339
with kids vaping lately,
15
00:01:08,340 --> 00:01:10,339
and they bribe
the recess monitor
16
00:01:10,340 --> 00:01:11,339
however they can.
17
00:01:11,340 --> 00:01:12,339
Jesus Christ!
18
00:01:12,340 --> 00:01:15,339
How much worse can things
get around here?!
19
00:01:15,340 --> 00:01:18,339
M'kay, but... but there
is good news, m'kay.
20
00:01:18,340 --> 00:01:21,339
We had the picture analyzed,
and it turns out it was
21
00:01:21,340 --> 00:01:23,339
actually just a picture
of a dog's butthole,
22
00:01:23,340 --> 00:01:26,339
m'kay, that your daughter
claimed was hers.
23
00:01:26,340 --> 00:01:28,340
M'kay, there it is...
A little fur right there.
24
00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,339
Seriously?
Dog's butthole?
25
00:01:32,340 --> 00:01:34,339
That's what we're
doing now, huh?
26
00:01:34,340 --> 00:01:36,339
There's not enough bad things
in the world?
27
00:01:36,340 --> 00:01:40,159
We get called into school,
here's a dog's butthole for ya.
28
00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:44,159
That's what it's all
come to, Shelley!?
29
00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:48,159
I'm over it, Sharon.
I am seriously over it.
30
00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:52,159
Don't you wanna just start over?
Go back to simpler times?
31
00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:53,159
What do you mean?
32
00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:56,159
I've had it... school shootings,
33
00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:58,159
pieces of shit
taking Ambien and tweeting,
34
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,159
priests raping kids,
and somehow...
35
00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:02,159
I'm not laughing anymore.
36
00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:05,159
Let's do it, Sharon,
what I've always talked about.
37
00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:06,159
Let's get outta here.
38
00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:09,159
Go buy a farm
and live off the land.
39
00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:11,159
Are you being serious?
40
00:02:11,160 --> 00:02:12,276
I've never been more serious.
41
00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:15,159
Hey, the lights green!
42
00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:16,369
Shut up, Nelson!
43
00:02:16,370 --> 00:02:18,159
Let's move out to the country.
44
00:02:18,160 --> 00:02:20,159
Go back to simple living
when things mattered,
45
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:22,159
like hard work and tegridy.
46
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,159
How will we make a living?
47
00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:25,159
By growing things
48
00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:28,159
and selling what we make
with our hands.
49
00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:30,159
We can do this, Sharon.
50
00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:32,489
It's time.
51
00:02:32,490 --> 00:02:37,489
♪ This ol' world is
gettin' to me ♪
52
00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:42,489
♪ There's just no trust,
no tegridy ♪
53
00:02:42,490 --> 00:02:48,489
♪ So, I loaded up the kids,
took my wife by the arm ♪
54
00:02:48,490 --> 00:02:51,489
♪ And I moved on out
to a Colorado farm ♪
55
00:02:55,490 --> 00:02:57,489
♪ Now it's early to bed,
early to rise ♪
56
00:02:57,490 --> 00:03:00,489
♪ The crops are plowed,
and it's no surprise ♪
57
00:03:00,490 --> 00:03:02,489
♪ City folks are fightin',
and I don't give a darn ♪
58
00:03:02,490 --> 00:03:04,489
♪ Darn
59
00:03:04,490 --> 00:03:10,489
♪ Cause I make my livin'
on a Colorado farm ♪
60
00:03:10,490 --> 00:03:13,489
♪ I gotta drive the tractor,
gotta cut the grass ♪
61
00:03:13,490 --> 00:03:16,489
♪ Chut-chut goes the baler
like it's never gonna last ♪
62
00:03:16,490 --> 00:03:18,489
♪ There's food in the kitchen,
and there's bud in the barn ♪
63
00:03:18,490 --> 00:03:20,489
♪ Barn
64
00:03:20,490 --> 00:03:23,489
♪ That's life
livin' on a Colorado farm ♪
65
00:03:26,490 --> 00:03:29,489
♪ Ice cold beer, pickup truck
66
00:03:29,490 --> 00:03:31,489
♪ Country music,
listin' shit ♪
67
00:03:31,490 --> 00:03:36,489
♪ We've got tegridy
to keep us warm ♪
68
00:03:36,490 --> 00:03:40,489
♪ That's what you get
on a Colorado Farm ♪
69
00:03:40,490 --> 00:03:42,489
♪ And I'm gonna stay
on a Colorado Farm ♪
70
00:03:42,490 --> 00:03:45,489
Shit...
71
00:03:49,490 --> 00:03:50,489
So, just like that?
72
00:03:50,490 --> 00:03:52,489
Your parents sold your house
and everything?
73
00:03:52,490 --> 00:03:53,489
Yeah, it takes me like an hour
to get to school now.
74
00:03:53,490 --> 00:03:54,489
It sucks.
75
00:03:54,490 --> 00:03:56,489
All because Shelley bribed
the playground monitor
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00:03:56,490 --> 00:03:58,489
to let her vape during recess.
77
00:03:58,490 --> 00:03:59,489
Why would your sister want
78
00:03:59,490 --> 00:04:01,489
to get addicted to those things?
79
00:04:01,490 --> 00:04:04,489
Well your little brother
does it too, Kyle.
80
00:04:04,490 --> 00:04:05,489
What are you talking about?
81
00:04:05,490 --> 00:04:06,489
You didn't know?
82
00:04:06,490 --> 00:04:07,489
The kindergartners are, like,
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00:04:07,490 --> 00:04:10,489
the biggest vapers
at this school.
84
00:04:10,490 --> 00:04:12,369
Vroom, vroom.
85
00:04:12,370 --> 00:04:13,489
I am a truck!
86
00:04:13,490 --> 00:04:16,489
Watch out for the monster!
87
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,489
Ike!
88
00:04:18,490 --> 00:04:20,490
Ike, do you have a vaping pen?!
89
00:04:21,490 --> 00:04:23,489
Nope.
90
00:04:23,490 --> 00:04:24,489
Dude! Gimme that!
91
00:04:24,490 --> 00:04:27,489
Hey!
Gimme back my vaporizer!
92
00:04:27,490 --> 00:04:28,489
What is this?
93
00:04:28,490 --> 00:04:30,489
Cherry-flavored nicotine?!
Are you joking?
94
00:04:30,490 --> 00:04:34,489
Aw, come on!
All the kids are doing it.
95
00:04:34,490 --> 00:04:36,489
Yeah!
I like lemon flavor!
96
00:04:36,490 --> 00:04:38,489
I like raspberry!
97
00:04:38,490 --> 00:04:40,489
Why do you want nicotine?!
98
00:04:40,490 --> 00:04:43,489
Do you know how hard it is
being a kindergartner?
99
00:04:43,490 --> 00:04:46,489
We need a break sometimes!
100
00:04:46,490 --> 00:04:48,489
These things are bad for you,
do you understand?!
101
00:04:48,490 --> 00:04:49,489
Bad kindergartners!
102
00:04:49,490 --> 00:04:52,489
Relax, bitch.
103
00:04:52,490 --> 00:04:55,490
Try some gummy bear surprise.
104
00:04:56,490 --> 00:04:59,490
All right.
Where'd you guys get these?
105
00:05:10,490 --> 00:05:13,489
Mornin', Joe.
How's the farmin'?
106
00:05:13,490 --> 00:05:15,489
Doing good, neighbor.
107
00:05:15,490 --> 00:05:18,489
Just planted some
Purple Skunky Kush.
108
00:05:18,490 --> 00:05:20,489
Harvested the Super Hindu Haze
last week.
109
00:05:20,490 --> 00:05:22,489
Well that's fine,
Joe, just fine.
110
00:05:22,490 --> 00:05:25,489
I'm growin' some
Green Willy Stranger myself.
111
00:05:25,490 --> 00:05:28,490
And the Catatonic Tegridy Bud
is takin' well.
112
00:05:30,490 --> 00:05:32,489
Well, see ya 'round, neighbor!
113
00:05:32,490 --> 00:05:34,490
So long, Joe!
114
00:05:36,490 --> 00:05:38,489
Kindergartners said
it's some big kid
115
00:05:38,490 --> 00:05:40,489
in a trench coat.
116
00:05:40,490 --> 00:05:41,489
Hey, look!
117
00:05:41,490 --> 00:05:42,489
That's gotta be him.
118
00:05:42,490 --> 00:05:44,489
What are you gonna do?
119
00:05:44,490 --> 00:05:45,489
I'm gonna tell him
if he sells a vape pen
120
00:05:45,490 --> 00:05:48,489
to my brother again,
I'm gonna kick his ass!
121
00:05:48,490 --> 00:05:49,489
Hey, you!
122
00:05:49,490 --> 00:05:51,489
Oh! Hey, fellas!
123
00:05:51,490 --> 00:05:52,489
Butters?!
124
00:05:52,490 --> 00:05:54,489
What are you guys doin?
125
00:05:54,490 --> 00:05:56,489
Butters, are you selling vapes?
126
00:05:56,490 --> 00:05:57,489
Well, sure!
Whatcha lookin' for?!
127
00:05:57,490 --> 00:06:01,489
I've got strawberry, vanilla,
tropical passion...
128
00:06:01,490 --> 00:06:03,489
- What?!
- Tropical passion.
129
00:06:03,490 --> 00:06:04,489
It's like mango and kiwi.
130
00:06:04,490 --> 00:06:05,489
Butters, you understand
this stuff is
131
00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,489
an epidemic at our school?!
132
00:06:07,490 --> 00:06:09,489
Yeah, and at five bucks a pop,
we're gonna be rich!
133
00:06:09,490 --> 00:06:12,489
Butters, this is for Kyle.
134
00:06:12,490 --> 00:06:14,490
Oof!
135
00:06:15,490 --> 00:06:17,489
Randy, I think we need
to have a talk.
136
00:06:17,490 --> 00:06:18,489
No time to talk.
137
00:06:18,490 --> 00:06:21,489
The agricultural inspector's
about to drop by.
138
00:06:21,490 --> 00:06:23,489
Once we get certified from him,
139
00:06:23,490 --> 00:06:25,489
we can start selling
like a real farm.
140
00:06:25,490 --> 00:06:27,489
Have patience, wife.
141
00:06:27,490 --> 00:06:28,644
Soon our fortunes will change.
142
00:06:30,490 --> 00:06:31,490
Ooh, that must be him now!
143
00:06:34,490 --> 00:06:36,489
Yes, I'm with
the State testing board.
144
00:06:36,490 --> 00:06:39,489
Is this...
Tegridy Farms?
145
00:06:39,490 --> 00:06:43,490
Name's right there on the sign.
Come on back!
146
00:06:44,490 --> 00:06:46,489
So, with this Vestin device,
147
00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:49,489
I can check not only
the THC levels in your product,
148
00:06:49,490 --> 00:06:53,489
but also detect any impurities
and give you a final score
149
00:06:53,490 --> 00:06:57,490
based on overall
chemical makeup.
150
00:07:00,490 --> 00:07:01,489
Yep.
151
00:07:01,490 --> 00:07:03,489
That's good shit.
152
00:07:03,490 --> 00:07:08,490
Now let me test the levels
in your organic house blend.
153
00:07:11,490 --> 00:07:14,489
Yep.
That's good shit.
154
00:07:14,490 --> 00:07:16,489
Now what about
the Tegridy Jungle Bud?
155
00:07:16,490 --> 00:07:18,490
Let's test it out.
156
00:07:24,490 --> 00:07:25,489
Whoa.
157
00:07:25,490 --> 00:07:26,489
Yeah?
158
00:07:26,490 --> 00:07:28,489
Whoa.
Yeeeah?!
159
00:07:28,490 --> 00:07:30,489
I don't know what tegridy is,
160
00:07:30,490 --> 00:07:33,489
but that is some good shit!
161
00:07:33,490 --> 00:07:34,489
All right!
162
00:07:34,490 --> 00:07:37,489
♪ Five, five dollar
163
00:07:37,490 --> 00:07:39,490
♪ Five-dollar footlooong
164
00:07:43,490 --> 00:07:44,489
Butters?!
165
00:07:44,490 --> 00:07:45,489
Why'd you punch me, Eric?!
166
00:07:45,490 --> 00:07:46,489
I had to!
167
00:07:46,490 --> 00:07:48,489
I thought we were partners!
168
00:07:48,490 --> 00:07:49,489
Butters, next time
when Kyle walks up to you
169
00:07:49,490 --> 00:07:51,489
and says "Are you
selling vape stuff,"
170
00:07:51,490 --> 00:07:53,489
You say,
"No, I am not, Kyle."
171
00:07:53,490 --> 00:07:54,489
You punched me in the face!
172
00:07:54,490 --> 00:07:56,489
Butters, we have to be
extra cautious right now
173
00:07:56,490 --> 00:07:58,490
or else we're...
Hang on, hang on...
174
00:08:00,490 --> 00:08:02,489
Hang on.
175
00:08:02,490 --> 00:08:04,490
Hang on.
176
00:08:05,490 --> 00:08:07,489
Okay, we have to be
extra cautious, Butters.
177
00:08:07,490 --> 00:08:09,489
The whole operation is
in a period of transition.
178
00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:11,489
What's that supposed to mean?!
179
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:13,489
In case you haven't noticed,
we're falling behind.
180
00:08:13,490 --> 00:08:15,489
We haven't sold enough product
to pay off our overhead.
181
00:08:15,490 --> 00:08:16,952
The people I bought from
are on my ass!
182
00:08:17,490 --> 00:08:18,489
Everything costs money, Butters.
183
00:08:18,490 --> 00:08:20,489
The pens, the juice,
even that jacket I got you.
184
00:08:20,490 --> 00:08:21,489
We can't start
getting sloppy now.
185
00:08:21,490 --> 00:08:22,489
Do you understand?
186
00:08:22,490 --> 00:08:23,489
Well, I don't know
how this means
187
00:08:23,490 --> 00:08:24,489
you can go and punch me
in the face...
188
00:08:24,490 --> 00:08:26,489
Everything will make sense,
Butters, I told you.
189
00:08:26,490 --> 00:08:28,490
Just stick with the plan, okay?
190
00:08:32,490 --> 00:08:33,489
Did you know that vaping
is way healthier
191
00:08:33,490 --> 00:08:37,489
than smoking cigarettes?
192
00:08:39,490 --> 00:08:40,489
All right, everyone!
193
00:08:40,490 --> 00:08:43,489
Who's ready for some
farm-to-table supper?!
194
00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:45,489
We've got some hemp milk here...
195
00:08:45,490 --> 00:08:47,489
hemp-oil and vinegar
bruschetta...
196
00:08:47,490 --> 00:08:49,489
some hemp seed tabouli.
197
00:08:49,490 --> 00:08:51,490
And guess what the napkins
are made from?
198
00:08:52,490 --> 00:08:55,490
Oh, wonder who that could be.
199
00:09:00,490 --> 00:09:03,489
Howdy.
What can I do ya for?
200
00:09:03,490 --> 00:09:05,489
Is this Tegridy Farms?
201
00:09:05,490 --> 00:09:08,489
Yeah, name's right there
on the sign.
202
00:09:08,490 --> 00:09:10,489
Our company is interested
in your product.
203
00:09:10,490 --> 00:09:11,489
We'd like to do some business
with you.
204
00:09:11,490 --> 00:09:13,489
Really?!
Hey, that'd be great!
205
00:09:13,490 --> 00:09:14,490
What kind of company...
206
00:09:17,490 --> 00:09:18,489
We're one of the top
vape companies
207
00:09:18,490 --> 00:09:19,489
in the state.
208
00:09:19,490 --> 00:09:21,489
We'd like to add your product
to our line.
209
00:09:21,490 --> 00:09:24,489
Oh, no. Sorry.
210
00:09:24,490 --> 00:09:27,489
I don't want my Tegridy Bud
put in those pussy sticks.
211
00:09:27,490 --> 00:09:28,699
Pussy sticks?
212
00:09:28,700 --> 00:09:30,489
Yeah, you know...
213
00:09:30,490 --> 00:09:31,489
Penis pen, wussy vape,
lady joints.
214
00:09:31,490 --> 00:09:34,489
Not on my farm, no sirree.
215
00:09:34,490 --> 00:09:35,489
You got a problem with vaping?!
216
00:09:35,490 --> 00:09:38,489
It's cleaner and healthier
than traditional smoking!
217
00:09:38,490 --> 00:09:39,489
That's nice.
218
00:09:39,490 --> 00:09:41,489
Now, hows about
you take that pussy stick
219
00:09:41,490 --> 00:09:43,489
and get off my farm
before I shove it up your ass
220
00:09:43,490 --> 00:09:44,489
and you're blowing mist
out your butthole.
221
00:09:44,490 --> 00:09:47,489
All right.
222
00:09:47,490 --> 00:09:48,489
You can be a part of progress
223
00:09:48,490 --> 00:09:50,489
or you can get run over by it.
224
00:09:50,490 --> 00:09:51,489
Yeah, whatever.
225
00:09:51,490 --> 00:09:53,489
All you're doin' is
blowin' smoke...
226
00:09:53,490 --> 00:09:55,489
Sorry, "fruity steam."
Pussy.
227
00:09:55,490 --> 00:09:57,489
What happened to your accent?
228
00:09:57,490 --> 00:10:00,489
Go vape some more, ya puss.
229
00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:03,490
You'll be sorry!
230
00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:12,709
I need to speak
with the principal.
231
00:10:12,710 --> 00:10:14,709
Okay.
What is it regarding?
232
00:10:14,710 --> 00:10:16,709
I'd rather just talk to him.
233
00:10:16,710 --> 00:10:20,709
Right through there,
you're second in line.
234
00:10:20,710 --> 00:10:22,709
- Oh, hey, Kyle.
- Hi, Kyle!
235
00:10:22,710 --> 00:10:23,709
What are you up to?
236
00:10:23,710 --> 00:10:25,709
You know what I'm up to.
237
00:10:25,710 --> 00:10:26,709
Okay, cool.
But come check this out.
238
00:10:26,710 --> 00:10:27,709
This is really cool...
Don't touch me.
239
00:10:27,710 --> 00:10:29,634
Just come... No, just come see.
D-D-Don't touch me.
240
00:10:29,710 --> 00:10:30,710
This is really cool
241
00:10:32,710 --> 00:10:35,709
You know, Kyle,
people all need a way to relax.
242
00:10:35,710 --> 00:10:37,709
And there's no proof
that vaping is that bad for you.
243
00:10:37,710 --> 00:10:39,709
You're selling it
to kindergartners!
244
00:10:39,710 --> 00:10:40,709
Kindergartners need a break,
too, Kyle!
245
00:10:40,710 --> 00:10:42,709
You know they
took away their nap time.
246
00:10:42,710 --> 00:10:45,709
You're such penises.
Would you rather
247
00:10:45,710 --> 00:10:46,709
the kindergartners
smoke cigarettes?
248
00:10:46,710 --> 00:10:48,709
Would you rather they drank?!
That's not good!
249
00:10:48,710 --> 00:10:49,709
Kyle! Kyle, Kyle!
Okay, okay!
250
00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:50,709
Just please listen, all right?
251
00:10:50,710 --> 00:10:53,709
The truth is...
we want out.
252
00:10:53,710 --> 00:10:54,709
Butters and I thought we
could just make some easy money.
253
00:10:54,710 --> 00:10:56,709
But you gotta pay off
the sixth graders,
254
00:10:56,710 --> 00:10:57,709
then you gotta pay off
the recess monitor
255
00:10:57,710 --> 00:10:58,709
to look the other way.
256
00:10:58,710 --> 00:10:59,709
We're in deep, Kyle.
257
00:10:59,710 --> 00:11:01,709
Just let us sell enough
to get out of debt,
258
00:11:01,710 --> 00:11:03,709
And we will stop, I swear it.
259
00:11:03,710 --> 00:11:04,709
You're so full of shit.
260
00:11:04,710 --> 00:11:06,709
Come on, Kyle.
We all make mistakes.
261
00:11:06,710 --> 00:11:08,709
Did you already forget
last week?
262
00:11:08,710 --> 00:11:10,709
You know...
263
00:11:10,710 --> 00:11:12,709
Ronan Farrow was here
asking about you.
264
00:11:12,710 --> 00:11:14,709
Ronan Farrow?
No, he wasn't.
265
00:11:14,710 --> 00:11:16,709
Yes, Kyle.
He was right over there!
266
00:11:16,710 --> 00:11:18,709
Just, please, give us two days
267
00:11:18,710 --> 00:11:20,709
to make back the money we need
to get out from under this,
268
00:11:20,710 --> 00:11:21,709
and we will stop.
269
00:11:21,710 --> 00:11:22,709
You have my word.
270
00:11:22,710 --> 00:11:25,359
Fine. But no more pushing it
on little kids, you got that?
271
00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:28,359
Okay. I'll focus my marketing
another direction.
272
00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:30,360
Thank you, Kyle.
273
00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:50,619
What ya doin', Joe?
274
00:11:50,620 --> 00:11:53,359
Oh, hey, Randy!
We, uh, we sold the farm.
275
00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:55,359
Just like that, huh?
276
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,359
You gonna let those people
with pussy sticks
277
00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:58,949
take over everything?
278
00:11:58,950 --> 00:12:00,359
Yeah.
They paid us great!
279
00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:02,359
My wife and I are gonna move
to Maui!
280
00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:03,359
Oh.
281
00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:06,359
Well, I hope you didn't
pack your tegridy.
282
00:12:06,360 --> 00:12:11,360
'Cause clearly...
your tegridy ain't goin'.
283
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,359
Are you still here?
284
00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:23,359
I-I didn't know
chickens wore suspenders.
285
00:12:23,360 --> 00:12:25,359
Agh.
286
00:12:29,360 --> 00:12:32,359
Man, am I feeling tired!
287
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:34,359
All this hard work at school?
288
00:12:34,360 --> 00:12:37,359
Yeah! I wish I had
a little pick-me-up!
289
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:39,359
Something fresh and fruity
to go with my lunch!
290
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:42,359
Just stop. It's so obvious
what you guys are doing.
291
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:44,359
It sounds so great right now!
292
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:47,360
Can anyone help with some
fun, fruity flavors?
293
00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:53,360
Oh, yeah!
294
00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:56,359
Hey, guys, it's the Vaping Man!
295
00:12:56,360 --> 00:12:59,359
What are you doing here,
Vaping Man?
296
00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:01,359
I'm here to offer
my fun, fruity flavors
297
00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:03,359
in a refreshing mist.
298
00:13:03,360 --> 00:13:06,359
Vaping?
Hey, that's bad for you.
299
00:13:06,360 --> 00:13:08,360
Vaping's only for cool kids.
300
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:11,359
Can I talk to you for a second?
301
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:12,359
Sure, Kyle.
What is this about?
302
00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:14,359
Can I talk to you over here?
303
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:15,360
Well, of course.
304
00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:18,359
What did I say about pushing it
on little kids?
305
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:20,359
How is this pushing it
on little kids, Kyle?
306
00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:22,359
Fun, fruity Vaping Man?!
307
00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:23,359
It's marketing!
308
00:13:23,360 --> 00:13:25,359
Kyle, we have to make the money
to pay off our dealer.
309
00:13:25,360 --> 00:13:26,359
How else are we supposed
to do it?
310
00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:29,359
All right, how much
do you owe the dealer?
311
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:31,360
Why?
How much?
312
00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:37,909
Isn't this great, Stan?
313
00:13:37,910 --> 00:13:39,359
Living off the land.
314
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:41,359
No, it sucks.
I hate this.
315
00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:42,359
I wanna go back home.
316
00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:44,359
Well, you see that?
We're talkin' now.
317
00:13:44,360 --> 00:13:47,359
When was the last time
we really talked like this?
318
00:13:47,360 --> 00:13:49,359
I hate you so much.
319
00:13:49,360 --> 00:13:52,359
I think we're having
a breakthrough moment.
320
00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:54,359
I want to give
you something, son.
321
00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:57,359
Something I made
that I want you to have.
322
00:13:57,360 --> 00:13:59,359
It's a hemp hat.
No.
323
00:13:59,360 --> 00:14:01,359
Come on.
Let's just see how it fits.
324
00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:02,359
Please, no.
325
00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:04,359
Here just... just look.
Just try it.
326
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:07,360
♪ One, two princes kneel
before you ♪
327
00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:10,359
♪ One, two
Whoa.
328
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:11,360
♪ Princes kneel before you
329
00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:15,359
♪ That's what I said, now
330
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:16,360
♪ Princes
331
00:14:18,360 --> 00:14:20,279
There you go,
332
00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:22,360
and thanks for shopping
at Big Vape.
333
00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:27,359
That's him.
334
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:28,359
That's my guy.
335
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,360
There you are.
You got my money?
336
00:14:31,360 --> 00:14:32,360
Kyle.
337
00:14:33,360 --> 00:14:34,359
Look, my friend is very stupid
338
00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:36,569
and should have never gone
into business with you.
339
00:14:36,570 --> 00:14:38,359
Who are you?
340
00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:39,359
I'm just seeing if I can
help settle things.
341
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:41,359
You probably don't realize it,
342
00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:43,359
but vaping is a really big
problem at our school.
343
00:14:43,360 --> 00:14:44,359
Look, I'm just filling a job
344
00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:46,359
that somebody else
would fill, all right?
345
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:48,359
Okay, look,
this is the money I've saved up
346
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:49,359
from my past three birthdays.
347
00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:51,359
Can we call this even
and end it?
348
00:14:51,360 --> 00:14:52,359
Aw, come on, man.
349
00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:54,359
I don't want to take
your birthday money.
350
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:55,359
Whoa.
Hey, dude.
351
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:57,359
Why is there
a dead hooker next to you?
352
00:14:57,360 --> 00:14:58,359
What?
What?
353
00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:00,359
Dude, that is a dead hooker.
What are you doing with it?
354
00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:01,359
I'm calling the cops!
355
00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:02,359
You just put
that dead hooker there.
356
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,359
Cartman, what are you doing?
357
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:05,359
There's a dead hooker
at the vape store!
358
00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:06,359
There!
359
00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:07,359
Ow!
Oh, shit!
360
00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:09,359
Get the vaporizers and the cash!
361
00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:10,359
Get the cash, Kyle!
362
00:15:10,360 --> 00:15:11,359
W-What... What are you doing?
363
00:15:11,360 --> 00:15:13,359
Just get the... Oh, shit!
Ronan Farrow! What?!
364
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,359
Cartman get the stuff
and the cash!
365
00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:17,360
Ronan Farrow, Kyle!
We got to get out of here!
366
00:15:19,360 --> 00:15:21,359
Bless us, Lord,
and our little cannabis farm.
367
00:15:21,360 --> 00:15:24,359
And may we always keep
our tegridy.
368
00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:26,359
Amen.
369
00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,359
So, how was everyone's day?
370
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:30,359
Uh, well, not great.
371
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,360
Uh, Stan got caught
with a vaping pen.
372
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:35,359
With a what?!
373
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:36,359
You know, those little
374
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:38,359
pen and cartridge things
with the mist?
375
00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:39,359
Stan had a vape pen?
376
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:42,360
You had a vaping...
Get up to your room right now!
377
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,360
Way to underreact, Sharon!
378
00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:49,359
Where did you get this?
379
00:15:49,360 --> 00:15:52,359
It's not mine.
I took it from a kindergartner.
380
00:15:52,360 --> 00:15:53,359
Yeah, right.
381
00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:56,359
My own son using a pussy stick.
382
00:15:56,360 --> 00:15:59,359
Don't you know what these things
are doing to our way of life?
383
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:00,359
I've had enough!
384
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:01,360
What are you gonna do?
385
00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:03,359
You think I'm just gonna
stand around
386
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,359
while they destroy my family?
387
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:07,359
We've worked
this farm and this land
388
00:16:07,360 --> 00:16:09,359
for over four days.
389
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,359
I'm not about to let
some vape queens
390
00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:13,360
take it all away from us.
391
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:22,679
Oh, hello, Kyle!
392
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:24,159
Mr. Mackey, I need
to talk to you
393
00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:25,799
about some things
going on at school.
394
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,799
M'kay.
Like what?
395
00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:28,799
Oh, hi, Kyle!
396
00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:30,430
Hey, Kyle!
397
00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:32,799
We were just talking
to the counselor
398
00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:33,799
about some college
opportunities.
399
00:16:33,800 --> 00:16:34,799
What are you doing here?
400
00:16:34,800 --> 00:16:36,799
You know what I'm doing here!
401
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,799
Okay, well, we really should
talk first, Kyle. No.
402
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:40,799
Mr. Mackey, there's a big
operation going on at the school.
403
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:41,799
Kyle, things have changed.
You need to listen.
404
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:43,799
Things are getting out of control... Kyle,
Kyle, just one minute. You want to hear this.
405
00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:44,799
...and you need to know what's going on!
You need to hear this!
406
00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:46,799
What?! We'll be right
back, Mr. Mackey.
407
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:47,800
M'kay!
408
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:49,799
Let go of me!
409
00:16:49,800 --> 00:16:50,799
Kyle, listen.
It's bad.
410
00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:51,799
What's bad?
411
00:16:51,800 --> 00:16:53,799
The guy we tried to frame
at the vape shop.
412
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:55,799
He was the one who the sixth
graders got their shit from.
413
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:57,799
The sixth graders
are pissed at us, Kyle.
414
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,799
We have to break
into the vape shop
415
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:00,799
and steal enough stuff to make
the sixth graders happy.
416
00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:02,799
You guys decided
to beat up the dealer.
417
00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:05,799
Yeah, but the sixth graders
know you were there! How?
418
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:06,799
'Cause Eric told them!
419
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:08,799
We are all in this
together, Kyle!
420
00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,719
We got to rob the vape shop,
421
00:17:10,720 --> 00:17:11,799
and then we can put this
all behind us.
422
00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,800
Please, Kyle, we still got
to pay people off.
423
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:18,799
Oh, yeah!
424
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:21,799
- Hey, bitches!
- Where's my mother money?
425
00:17:21,800 --> 00:17:24,800
Run!
Aah!
426
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:36,799
♪ We're not indestructible
427
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:40,559
♪ Baby,
better get that straight ♪
428
00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:43,799
♪ I think it's unbelievable
429
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,799
♪ How you give in
to the hands of fate ♪
430
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:50,799
♪ One, two, princes
kneel before you ♪
431
00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:51,800
♪ That's what I said
432
00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:55,849
Randy, where are you going?
433
00:17:55,850 --> 00:17:58,800
Gonna go fight
for my children's future.
434
00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:19,800
All right, you bunch
of vape-smoking pussies.
435
00:18:21,492 --> 00:18:23,491
You try and take my way of life?
436
00:18:23,492 --> 00:18:25,491
Time to show you some tegridy.
437
00:18:25,492 --> 00:18:28,491
Tegridy?
What's tegridy?
438
00:18:28,492 --> 00:18:30,491
Yeah!
439
00:18:30,492 --> 00:18:31,491
Ow!
440
00:18:31,492 --> 00:18:33,491
Ouch! Hey!
441
00:18:33,492 --> 00:18:36,491
Hyah!
Hyah!
442
00:18:36,492 --> 00:18:38,491
Owie!
443
00:18:38,492 --> 00:18:43,491
Get your stupid mist
out of my face!
444
00:18:43,492 --> 00:18:45,491
Hey!
I like to vape.
445
00:18:45,492 --> 00:18:47,491
You think I'm a pussy?
446
00:18:47,492 --> 00:18:48,491
Yup.
447
00:18:48,492 --> 00:18:50,492
Ow!
448
00:18:52,492 --> 00:18:55,491
Wow. You're so smart to think
of a siphon, Kyle!
449
00:18:55,492 --> 00:18:57,491
Just shut up and keep pumping.
450
00:18:57,492 --> 00:18:59,492
What are you kids doing?
451
00:19:00,492 --> 00:19:02,491
Aw, shit!
452
00:19:02,492 --> 00:19:05,491
You little hoodlums
break in through the window?
453
00:19:05,492 --> 00:19:07,491
I ought to break
your little legs!
454
00:19:07,492 --> 00:19:09,491
I don't think so.
455
00:19:09,492 --> 00:19:11,911
Mr. Marsh.
456
00:19:11,912 --> 00:19:14,491
Just what the Sam hell
you boys doing here?
457
00:19:14,492 --> 00:19:16,491
All right, listen.
458
00:19:16,492 --> 00:19:18,491
I should have talked
to an adult from the beginning.
459
00:19:18,492 --> 00:19:19,491
Kyle, what are you doing?
460
00:19:19,492 --> 00:19:21,491
There are these three big vaping
syndicates at our school,
461
00:19:21,492 --> 00:19:23,491
and these guys are one of them.
Kyle, no, no, no, no.
462
00:19:23,492 --> 00:19:25,491
They had someone buying stuff
from here for them,
463
00:19:25,492 --> 00:19:26,491
and then they sold it to kids.
464
00:19:26,492 --> 00:19:27,491
Okay, Kyle,
I'm calling Ronan Farrow.
465
00:19:27,492 --> 00:19:29,491
The sixth graders, these guys,
and Becky Thompson
466
00:19:29,492 --> 00:19:31,491
are all at each other
for control of the playground.
467
00:19:31,492 --> 00:19:33,491
Hello, Ronan?
Eric Cartman. Yeah, hey.
468
00:19:33,492 --> 00:19:36,491
I was going to tell an adult,
but these guys said they'd stop.
469
00:19:36,492 --> 00:19:38,491
So, you know Kyle? Yeah, well,
you're right about him.
470
00:19:38,492 --> 00:19:41,491
It's good you came clean, son.
471
00:19:41,492 --> 00:19:42,531
It shows that you've got...
472
00:19:46,492 --> 00:19:48,491
Didn't your mommy teach you
473
00:19:48,492 --> 00:19:50,491
it doesn't pay
to mess with progress?
474
00:19:50,492 --> 00:19:53,491
Yeah. She taught me
somethin' else, too.
475
00:19:53,492 --> 00:19:56,491
If you're gonna fight
for your tegridy,
476
00:19:56,492 --> 00:19:59,491
don't forget to bring a towel.
477
00:19:59,492 --> 00:20:01,492
Vape on this, bitch!
478
00:20:04,492 --> 00:20:06,491
Yeah!
479
00:20:06,492 --> 00:20:09,492
Take that, stupid vaping!
480
00:20:19,492 --> 00:20:22,492
Move it, boys!
Come on! Go, go, go!
481
00:20:53,492 --> 00:20:56,492
Does this mean we're out
of the vaping business, fellas?
482
00:20:59,492 --> 00:21:02,491
♪ It's in you
483
00:21:02,492 --> 00:21:04,491
♪ It's in me
484
00:21:04,492 --> 00:21:08,492
♪ A little somethin'
called Tegridy ♪
485
00:21:09,492 --> 00:21:11,491
Well, shit.
486
00:21:11,492 --> 00:21:15,491
Looks like we made it
to another sunrise.
487
00:21:15,492 --> 00:21:17,491
Oh, God. This is just gonna
get worse, isn't it?
488
00:21:17,492 --> 00:21:20,491
Yup, son. I think the fight's
just startin'.
489
00:21:20,492 --> 00:21:23,491
Farmers like us
are under attack.
490
00:21:23,492 --> 00:21:26,491
Yupper.
We gots a lot of work to do.
491
00:21:26,492 --> 00:21:29,491
We can't let 'em take
what makes us special.
492
00:21:29,492 --> 00:21:33,491
Tegridy Weed from Tegridy Farms.
493
00:21:33,492 --> 00:21:37,491
Made with a little
Colorado tegridy.
494
00:21:37,492 --> 00:21:40,492
Comin' soon
to a dispensary near you.
495
00:21:49,492 --> 00:21:50,491
Whoa.
496
00:21:50,492 --> 00:21:51,661
Yeah?
497
00:21:51,662 --> 00:21:54,491
Whoa.
Yeeeah?!
498
00:21:54,492 --> 00:21:56,491
I don't know what tegridy is,
499
00:21:56,492 --> 00:21:58,491
but that is some good shit!
500
00:21:58,492 --> 00:21:59,492
All right!
35813
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