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These are the legends.
2
00:00:20,431 --> 00:00:22,332
You've heard about them for years.
3
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The pretty housewife...
you know the one.
4
00:00:25,436 --> 00:00:28,338
The friends burst in at the surprise party,
find her spread eagle...
5
00:00:28,439 --> 00:00:32,209
with the family dog licking peanut butter
from between her legs.
6
00:00:32,310 --> 00:00:33,643
Well, she's real.
7
00:00:33,778 --> 00:00:36,747
Remember the cheerleader?
She gets her stomach pumped.
8
00:00:36,848 --> 00:00:39,010
- They find a quart of sperm.
Her name's Luann.
9
00:00:39,036 --> 00:00:39,931
Hey.
10
00:00:40,151 --> 00:00:44,154
They may not look like much to you,
but they were all-stars on the circuit.
11
00:00:44,255 --> 00:00:46,590
The hooker reunites
with the john here...
12
00:00:46,691 --> 00:00:48,958
the molester with the molested.
13
00:00:49,794 --> 00:00:51,919
The guy hanging naked
from the shower curtain rod...
14
00:00:51,963 --> 00:00:54,763
half dead from autoerotic asphyxiation?
15
00:00:55,933 --> 00:00:58,835
- Hi. My name's Lonnie, and I'm a sex addict.
- He's Lonnie. And he's a sex addict.
16
00:00:58,936 --> 00:01:00,136
Hi, Lonnie.
17
00:01:01,372 --> 00:01:04,374
These people are the reason
emergency rooms have special tools...
18
00:01:04,475 --> 00:01:08,345
to remove the champagne bottle,
the fluorescent bulb, the hamster.
19
00:01:08,446 --> 00:01:11,228
- Did you ever experience-
- For the freaks in here, sex is a compulsion...
20
00:01:11,249 --> 00:01:14,518
- like gambling, or drugs, or shoplifting.
- Hi. My name is Agnes.
21
00:01:14,619 --> 00:01:16,953
At least this one looks like love...
22
00:01:17,054 --> 00:01:18,254
if you squint.
23
00:01:19,023 --> 00:01:20,924
That's my best friend, Denny.
24
00:01:21,025 --> 00:01:23,527
Denny showed up here
after he got booted from art school...
25
00:01:23,628 --> 00:01:26,463
for waxing his weasel
during life drawing class.
26
00:01:26,564 --> 00:01:28,498
Not like the model was even fine.
27
00:01:28,599 --> 00:01:31,301
Just some old hippie
with overgrown nature bush.
28
00:01:31,402 --> 00:01:33,734
But Denny didn't care.
By then he was masturbating
29
00:01:33,835 --> 00:01:36,302
15 times a day just to break even.
30
00:01:36,908 --> 00:01:39,209
Got so he could barely
make a fist anymore.
31
00:01:39,310 --> 00:01:43,847
Nico gets released from the halfway house
twice a week for therapy...
32
00:01:43,948 --> 00:01:45,548
just like Cinderella.
33
00:01:45,950 --> 00:01:49,083
Only at midnight
she turns into a fugitive.
34
00:01:50,087 --> 00:01:52,322
Don't get me wrong.
I'm no different.
35
00:01:52,423 --> 00:01:54,391
We're all here for the same reason:
36
00:01:54,492 --> 00:01:58,795
to dig through our personal valise
of perverse, heartbreaking memories...
37
00:01:58,896 --> 00:02:02,999
until we find one that helps us
to break the cycle, to get sober.
38
00:02:03,100 --> 00:02:07,103
For me, that means no more constant
meaningless sex with strangers...
39
00:02:07,204 --> 00:02:08,404
all the time.
40
00:02:09,407 --> 00:02:11,908
I come to meetings.
I work the steps.
41
00:02:12,009 --> 00:02:13,676
I even try to abstain.
42
00:02:14,078 --> 00:02:16,345
So far, it's not going so well.
43
00:02:20,384 --> 00:02:23,119
- Not that it's any picnic to quit.
- Sign this.
44
00:02:23,220 --> 00:02:26,756
Sex addicts become literally dependent
on the rush of constant sex.
45
00:02:26,857 --> 00:02:28,992
Around the world, Nico.
Around the world, baby.
46
00:02:29,093 --> 00:02:32,262
Orgasms release endorphins.
Endorphins kill pain.
47
00:02:32,363 --> 00:02:33,963
And I'm all for that.
48
00:02:34,365 --> 00:02:35,932
- You got something to write with?
- In my pocket.
49
00:02:36,033 --> 00:02:40,170
Hold on a second. I'm Nico's sponsor,
and I take that very seriously.
50
00:02:40,271 --> 00:02:41,671
Here you go, babe.
51
00:02:43,140 --> 00:02:45,675
I mean, please,
even the worst blowjob is better...
52
00:02:45,776 --> 00:02:50,647
than, say, sniffing the greatest rose
or watching the greatest sunset.
53
00:02:50,748 --> 00:02:52,716
But I'm not thinking about that now...
54
00:02:52,817 --> 00:02:55,819
because at any moment
I won't have a problem in the world.
55
00:02:55,920 --> 00:02:58,787
No bills, no stupid job,
no crazy mother.
56
00:02:58,990 --> 00:03:02,723
All I'm going to feel is perfect,
beautiful nothing.
57
00:03:02,893 --> 00:03:04,293
Fuck you! Not yet.
58
00:03:11,502 --> 00:03:13,235
Here it comes. Perfect.
59
00:03:13,971 --> 00:03:15,571
- Beautiful.
- Fu...
60
00:03:20,511 --> 00:03:21,844
Keep coming back.
61
00:03:22,513 --> 00:03:25,348
It works if you work it,
so work it, you're worth it.
62
00:03:25,449 --> 00:03:26,649
Yeah.
63
00:03:34,258 --> 00:03:36,325
What'd you say you do again?
64
00:03:36,627 --> 00:03:39,427
I am the backbone
of colonial America.
65
00:03:40,498 --> 00:03:44,365
- Welcome to the Village of Dunsboro.
- Come on, kids.
66
00:03:44,535 --> 00:03:46,222
Here, life in an
18th-century settlement
67
00:03:46,323 --> 00:03:50,056
- is re-created in vivid detail.
- Here. Take it.
68
00:03:50,307 --> 00:03:52,576
For some, it's more vivid than others.
69
00:03:52,677 --> 00:03:54,578
Not that you can blame 'em.
70
00:03:54,679 --> 00:03:57,881
We're all marooned here
like castaways on some TV show...
71
00:03:57,982 --> 00:04:00,249
who never age and never escape.
72
00:04:00,351 --> 00:04:02,819
Think Gilligan meets Groundhog Day...
73
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:04,120
in hell.
74
00:04:05,222 --> 00:04:06,889
Hmm. Can I get a turn?
75
00:04:08,459 --> 00:04:10,259
- Sure you can.
- When?
76
00:04:11,195 --> 00:04:14,030
When the Mayflower sails
out of my ass.
77
00:04:14,131 --> 00:04:15,731
- Hey, kids.
- Nice.
78
00:04:16,133 --> 00:04:19,200
- Ooh.
- Hi. All right. Watch this. Ready?
79
00:04:20,304 --> 00:04:22,104
Whoa, you've got skills.
80
00:04:22,373 --> 00:04:24,640
How do you know how to do that?
81
00:04:34,318 --> 00:04:37,318
- Get off me. Aah.!
- Hey, man. What the-
82
00:04:40,091 --> 00:04:42,058
Hey, get out of here, you little shits!
83
00:04:42,159 --> 00:04:43,492
Easy, easy, easy.
84
00:04:44,395 --> 00:04:45,728
It's me. It's me.
85
00:04:47,164 --> 00:04:49,366
- Sorry, dude.
- You all right?
86
00:04:49,467 --> 00:04:52,669
Yeah, these kids kept putting
this ferret thing down my pants.
87
00:04:52,770 --> 00:04:53,970
Am I bleeding?
88
00:04:54,839 --> 00:04:57,106
- Oh, God.
- What? What is it?
89
00:04:57,241 --> 00:04:58,441
Ursula, man.
90
00:05:00,010 --> 00:05:03,010
- She's a milkmaid.
- You got that right.
91
00:05:03,914 --> 00:05:05,114
No.
92
00:05:05,616 --> 00:05:06,816
No.
93
00:05:07,218 --> 00:05:08,418
Yeah.
94
00:05:09,053 --> 00:05:10,987
She's milking those cows all day...
95
00:05:11,088 --> 00:05:15,158
working those fingers up and down
and up and down and up and down.
96
00:05:15,259 --> 00:05:17,592
- Hey! Hey, hey, man!
- Thanks.
97
00:05:18,295 --> 00:05:21,464
- Yeah, you may not want to do that.
- Ursula?
98
00:05:21,565 --> 00:05:22,765
Hi.
99
00:05:24,168 --> 00:05:25,501
Look at this guy.
100
00:05:26,904 --> 00:05:28,505
Man's a glutton for punishment.
101
00:05:28,606 --> 00:05:29,806
She laughed.
102
00:05:31,142 --> 00:05:33,643
- Did you see that?
- "At," dude, not "with."
103
00:05:33,744 --> 00:05:34,944
Right.
104
00:05:41,585 --> 00:05:43,185
Oh, shit. Let's roll.
105
00:05:44,989 --> 00:05:47,189
Wait, wait. Where is it? Fuck.
106
00:05:47,324 --> 00:05:50,193
- What the fuck are you doing?
- I need my wig. Where's my wig?
107
00:05:50,294 --> 00:05:54,361
- Leave the goddamn wig, will you?
- Dude, he'll dock me.
108
00:05:54,765 --> 00:05:57,467
- Who hast released thee from thy bonds?
- My bonds?
109
00:05:57,568 --> 00:05:59,301
Thou knowest the rules.
110
00:05:59,937 --> 00:06:02,572
Miscreants may be freed only by a duly
appointed member of the constabulary.
111
00:06:02,673 --> 00:06:04,574
Give it a rest with the olden spiel,
Charlie.
112
00:06:04,675 --> 00:06:06,576
You heard the bells. We're off.
113
00:06:06,677 --> 00:06:09,379
- And what of his uncovered pate?
- My what?
114
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:11,080
Your pate! Your pate.
115
00:06:12,550 --> 00:06:16,586
Discarding period attire whilst within colony
walls is a clear violation of character.
116
00:06:16,687 --> 00:06:18,354
Fine. Okay? You happy?
117
00:06:19,456 --> 00:06:21,982
Thy purse shall suffer
for thy transgressions.
118
00:06:22,008 --> 00:06:23,351
Hey, hey, hey, look.
119
00:06:23,427 --> 00:06:27,430
I don't mind if you wanna play method Mussolini
to this bunch of failed drama school rejects...
120
00:06:27,531 --> 00:06:30,734
- but you dock my check one more time-
- Victor.
121
00:06:30,835 --> 00:06:33,336
thou wilt feel the wrath
of a fuckin' beat-down.
122
00:06:33,437 --> 00:06:36,706
- Bring it then, varlet, if thou be a man.
- Victor! Victor!
123
00:06:36,807 --> 00:06:38,775
- What wilt thou do?
- What am I gonna do? What? What?
124
00:06:38,876 --> 00:06:41,809
- What sayest thou?
- It's the last bus.
125
00:06:42,746 --> 00:06:44,714
- What wilt thou do?
- Oh!
126
00:06:44,815 --> 00:06:46,716
- Come on.
- All right. Let's go. Come on.
127
00:06:46,817 --> 00:06:49,284
- Where dost thou go?
- Let's go.
128
00:06:50,187 --> 00:06:51,387
Fuckin' knave.
129
00:07:03,100 --> 00:07:05,335
Dude, where is this place?
130
00:07:05,436 --> 00:07:07,804
It's coming up.
131
00:07:07,905 --> 00:07:09,939
Here.
132
00:07:13,410 --> 00:07:16,677
Thank you.
133
00:07:25,489 --> 00:07:29,559
Can't we just this once enjoy
a nice meal like normal people?
134
00:07:29,660 --> 00:07:30,860
No.
135
00:07:32,296 --> 00:07:36,096
- You can't fool people into loving you.
- Wanna bet?
136
00:07:44,541 --> 00:07:46,442
Somebody saves your life...
137
00:07:46,543 --> 00:07:48,410
they'll love you forever.
138
00:07:49,446 --> 00:07:51,846
It's like the old Chinese custom.
139
00:07:52,349 --> 00:07:54,016
They feel responsible.
140
00:07:55,052 --> 00:07:58,185
They'll write.
They'll send birthday cards.
141
00:07:58,589 --> 00:08:00,456
Play it right, even cash.
142
00:08:02,726 --> 00:08:08,193
Unless you let yourself get rescued by
some busboy who brings down 350 a week.
143
00:08:09,199 --> 00:08:10,532
Hey! That's mine.
144
00:08:11,735 --> 00:08:13,935
So, who's it gonna be tonight?
145
00:08:14,471 --> 00:08:17,471
How 'bout you, honey?
You feeling heroic?
146
00:08:17,708 --> 00:08:18,908
Uh-oh. Swatch.
147
00:08:19,810 --> 00:08:21,010
Okay. Come on.!
148
00:08:21,979 --> 00:08:26,246
There he is. You and me,
we're about to be friends for life.
149
00:08:26,784 --> 00:08:28,544
- Come on. Come on, come on.
- Who knows? This...
150
00:08:28,645 --> 00:08:30,320
might be the greatest
day of their lives.
151
00:08:30,421 --> 00:08:34,421
- One heroic deed that justifies
their entire existence.
152
00:08:37,094 --> 00:08:39,094
They grab you and hold you.
153
00:08:40,731 --> 00:08:43,264
They rock you softly in their arms.
154
00:08:43,534 --> 00:08:46,067
All right. It's gonna be all right.
155
00:08:47,237 --> 00:08:50,370
And before you know it,
you're their child.
156
00:08:50,474 --> 00:08:52,408
- You're okay.
- You belong to them.
157
00:08:52,509 --> 00:08:53,709
Yeah.
158
00:08:56,547 --> 00:09:00,080
- Okay.
- You see this? This is my favorite part.
159
00:09:06,123 --> 00:09:08,024
- Hey, Kim.
- Hi, Victor.
160
00:09:08,125 --> 00:09:10,458
- How art thou?
- That's funny.
161
00:09:10,961 --> 00:09:13,294
- That's very funny.
- Proceed.
162
00:09:19,336 --> 00:09:21,336
Mrs. Novak is an undresser.
163
00:09:21,939 --> 00:09:24,872
That's why she gets the special pantsuit.
164
00:09:26,276 --> 00:09:29,512
Other patients express themselves
through art...
165
00:09:29,613 --> 00:09:31,746
which can also be disturbing.
166
00:09:32,683 --> 00:09:35,350
Eva here is what you call a squirrel.
167
00:09:36,453 --> 00:09:38,653
Colin? Oh, Colin, is that you?
168
00:09:38,989 --> 00:09:40,890
What do we have tonight, Eva?
169
00:09:40,991 --> 00:09:42,258
Hmm. Roast beef.
170
00:09:42,860 --> 00:09:45,128
That's not doing you any good
in there, now, is it?
171
00:09:45,229 --> 00:09:47,964
You hurt me, Colin.
You hurt me, and I'm telling Mother.
172
00:09:48,065 --> 00:09:50,967
- That might prove challenging.
- You touched my woo-woo.
173
00:09:51,068 --> 00:09:54,001
I definitely did not touch
your woo-woo.
174
00:09:54,338 --> 00:09:55,815
If it wasn't
for that chip in her
175
00:09:55,916 --> 00:09:57,573
bracelet, she'd follow
me around all night...
176
00:09:57,674 --> 00:09:59,876
squawking about her poor woo-woo.
177
00:09:59,977 --> 00:10:03,977
St. Anthony's is what you call
a constant care facility.
178
00:10:04,548 --> 00:10:07,015
It's for loony broads of all ages.
179
00:10:07,217 --> 00:10:10,350
But mostly,
it's where grannies get dumped.
180
00:10:12,556 --> 00:10:14,958
You see that look she just gave me?
181
00:10:15,059 --> 00:10:17,293
That's 'cause that really happened.
182
00:10:17,394 --> 00:10:20,129
Guess you could say
I'm kinda tight with the staff.
183
00:10:20,230 --> 00:10:21,697
Hello. Who are you?
184
00:10:22,966 --> 00:10:26,366
Oh, that's right.
You're gonna ruin everything.
185
00:10:26,770 --> 00:10:29,437
But of course, I don't know that yet.
186
00:10:30,774 --> 00:10:32,441
Well, it's about time.
187
00:10:32,776 --> 00:10:36,012
She's been asking for you all day.
Wouldn't take a bite until you got here.
188
00:10:36,113 --> 00:10:38,348
- Who am I today?
- Some guy named Fred.
189
00:10:38,449 --> 00:10:40,984
- Sounds like another one of the lawyers.
- He was.
190
00:10:41,085 --> 00:10:43,853
- "Was"?
- Fred's dead. Aortic aneurysm.
191
00:10:43,954 --> 00:10:46,923
- Fall of'97.
- You forgetting something?
192
00:10:47,024 --> 00:10:48,224
Oh.
193
00:10:49,126 --> 00:10:50,926
- So, you good?
- Yeah.
194
00:10:52,362 --> 00:10:54,764
Well, my lady,
I'll see you later. Okay?
195
00:10:54,865 --> 00:10:56,065
Okay.
196
00:11:04,074 --> 00:11:06,741
That's nice.
Hey, where's Constance?
197
00:11:07,211 --> 00:11:09,679
Upstairs.
They took her this morning.
198
00:11:09,780 --> 00:11:11,647
Oh. Well, she'll be back.
199
00:11:13,150 --> 00:11:14,950
Oh, no, she won't, Fred.
200
00:11:15,252 --> 00:11:18,621
They take you up to the second floor,
you don't come back.
201
00:11:18,722 --> 00:11:21,891
But they take you up to the third floor,
you'd just better hope your plot's paid up.
202
00:11:21,992 --> 00:11:23,525
I got... cannelloni!
203
00:11:24,795 --> 00:11:27,862
- Huh?
- Will you get that out of my face?
204
00:11:28,031 --> 00:11:32,935
You're just like my son, Victor, always trying
to shove some inedible mosh down my throat.
205
00:11:33,036 --> 00:11:35,103
I thought you liked Italian.
206
00:11:35,305 --> 00:11:37,105
You gotta eat, you know.
207
00:11:38,442 --> 00:11:39,642
You gotta-
208
00:11:42,813 --> 00:11:44,013
Oh, it's you!
209
00:11:49,486 --> 00:11:51,019
What happened, Fred?
210
00:11:54,091 --> 00:11:56,559
You used to cut quite the dashing figure.
Now look at you.
211
00:11:56,660 --> 00:12:00,096
You look like my son, Victor,
the minimum wage tour guide.
212
00:12:00,197 --> 00:12:01,430
He's not a tour guide.
213
00:12:01,456 --> 00:12:04,425
Well, something menial
or irrelevant like that.
214
00:12:04,501 --> 00:12:08,004
You know what he did?
He dropped out of medical school.
215
00:12:08,105 --> 00:12:09,839
- Did you know that?
- I heard.
216
00:12:09,940 --> 00:12:12,909
Now he's so busy ruining his life,
he doesn't have time to visit his mother.
217
00:12:13,010 --> 00:12:14,477
That's disgraceful.
218
00:12:15,145 --> 00:12:18,815
When I think what I went through to give
that boy some vision, to open his eyes.
219
00:12:18,916 --> 00:12:21,517
And do you know how he repays me?
You know what he did?
220
00:12:21,618 --> 00:12:24,053
- He had me committed-
- Isn't Victor supporting you?
221
00:12:24,154 --> 00:12:25,554
Who told you that?
222
00:12:26,190 --> 00:12:28,091
I heard he dropped out
of medical school...
223
00:12:28,192 --> 00:12:30,359
just so you could move into
an expensive private hospital.
224
00:12:30,460 --> 00:12:33,260
Didn't I hear something like that? Huh?
225
00:12:33,864 --> 00:12:35,531
Look, there's my show.
226
00:12:35,866 --> 00:12:37,991
And I got a feelin'
Victor might visit more often...
227
00:12:38,035 --> 00:12:41,704
if you didn't spend all your time
talking to a bunch of dead lawyers.
228
00:12:41,805 --> 00:12:44,672
- Huh?
- Oh, you'll never change, Fred.
229
00:12:45,742 --> 00:12:48,211
You're always defending
the hopelessly guilty.
230
00:12:48,312 --> 00:12:50,579
That's not how you drown a cat.
231
00:12:58,722 --> 00:13:02,725
You're in a hospital.
Dr. Blue is called on the intercom.
232
00:13:02,826 --> 00:13:05,361
- Uh, that means somebody stopped breathing.
- Good.
233
00:13:05,462 --> 00:13:08,831
- Pamela Cosgrove paged in an airport.
- Oh, I know this one.
234
00:13:08,932 --> 00:13:11,434
- Quick, quick, quick.
- I know this one. Terrorist with a gun.
235
00:13:11,535 --> 00:13:15,071
Terrilynn Mayfield,
please pick up a courtesy phone.
236
00:13:15,172 --> 00:13:16,372
Uh, nerve gas?
237
00:13:17,441 --> 00:13:21,641
- Think cows and horses.
- Oh, anthrax. Why am I so stupid?
238
00:13:21,979 --> 00:13:24,947
That's all right. Learn half these names,
you'll live longer than most.
239
00:13:25,048 --> 00:13:27,283
Forget what
some foster family teaches you.
240
00:13:27,384 --> 00:13:30,117
These fake people are all that matter.
241
00:13:31,054 --> 00:13:33,587
- What is it?
- It's a playground.
242
00:13:34,091 --> 00:13:38,224
- Could we go over there?
- Why on earth would we do that?
243
00:13:38,929 --> 00:13:42,462
Mmm, just to swing and stuff,
like normal people.
244
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:45,101
We have to keep moving, honey.
245
00:13:45,202 --> 00:13:50,072
If we stopped at every playground we came
across, we'd never get anything done.
246
00:13:50,173 --> 00:13:51,440
Eat your supper.
247
00:14:12,095 --> 00:14:14,162
What are you supposed to be?
248
00:14:16,133 --> 00:14:18,868
Oh, I'm the backbone of colonial America.
249
00:14:18,969 --> 00:14:22,036
- Which is?
- An Irish indentured servant.
250
00:14:22,472 --> 00:14:25,405
- Where's Dr. Fielding?
- Gone. Retired.
251
00:14:25,909 --> 00:14:28,377
- Are you in charge of my mother?
- Name?
252
00:14:28,478 --> 00:14:29,878
- Victor.
- Hers?
253
00:14:30,747 --> 00:14:32,280
Oh. Um, Ida Mancini.
254
00:14:34,117 --> 00:14:36,050
- You're the son.
- Yeah.
255
00:14:36,153 --> 00:14:39,121
- The tour guide.
- I'm not a tour guide.
256
00:14:39,222 --> 00:14:41,190
I'm a historical interpreter.
257
00:14:41,291 --> 00:14:42,491
Okay.
258
00:14:43,894 --> 00:14:45,761
How come you never visit?
259
00:14:45,962 --> 00:14:48,030
I visit all the time, just not as myself.
260
00:14:48,131 --> 00:14:51,398
Kind of defeats the purpose,
don't you think?
261
00:14:52,102 --> 00:14:54,070
She's an amazing woman, your mother.
262
00:14:54,171 --> 00:14:57,707
- Yeah. Listen, Dr. -
- Marshall. Dr. Paige Marshall.
263
00:14:57,808 --> 00:14:59,608
Hi. She's getting worse.
264
00:14:59,876 --> 00:15:02,511
She-She never knows who I am anymore
and now she won't eat.
265
00:15:02,612 --> 00:15:05,681
- Even when the lawyer comes to visit?
- There's no lawyer.
266
00:15:05,782 --> 00:15:08,818
I'm the lawyer. Today she spat out
cannelloni from Cicero's.
267
00:15:08,919 --> 00:15:10,886
That's like her death row favorite meal.
268
00:15:10,987 --> 00:15:13,321
I've seen her sprint 10 blocks in heels
just to steal it.
269
00:15:13,390 --> 00:15:16,259
We're reaching the point
where decisions have to be made.
270
00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:18,561
Decisions?
What do you mean, decisions?
271
00:15:18,662 --> 00:15:19,862
Dr. Marshall.!
272
00:15:22,466 --> 00:15:25,067
- You'll have to excuse me now.
- Hey, hey.
273
00:15:25,168 --> 00:15:28,537
Could we go somewhere and talk,
you know, about my mother and stuff?
274
00:15:28,638 --> 00:15:30,105
- Now?
- Or later.
275
00:15:31,074 --> 00:15:34,110
We could meet for a drink
or, uh-you know.
276
00:15:34,211 --> 00:15:35,878
Are you asking me out?
277
00:15:36,413 --> 00:15:38,746
Well, no. Sort of. I mean, yeah.
278
00:15:41,151 --> 00:15:44,120
I have to finish my rounds now,
Mr. Mancini.
279
00:15:44,221 --> 00:15:46,522
We'll talk again on your next visit.
280
00:15:46,623 --> 00:15:47,823
But-
281
00:15:49,426 --> 00:15:52,795
- These are your grandparents, right?
- Um, I guess so, yeah.
282
00:15:52,896 --> 00:15:55,898
- I never met them.
- Why do they look like that?
283
00:15:55,999 --> 00:15:58,799
- They're Italian.
- Like, from Italy?
284
00:15:59,369 --> 00:16:00,569
Yeah.
285
00:16:01,772 --> 00:16:04,674
Uh, Mom came for boarding school
and never went back.
286
00:16:04,775 --> 00:16:06,375
Ah. Look at her here.
287
00:16:10,113 --> 00:16:13,313
Wow. She was really,
really, really, really-
288
00:16:13,683 --> 00:16:15,483
Hey, hey! What the fuck!
289
00:16:16,553 --> 00:16:19,455
- Dude.! That's my mom.
- I'm sorry, dude.
290
00:16:19,556 --> 00:16:21,889
- It's just, she was hot.
- No.
291
00:16:22,125 --> 00:16:24,125
Here. Make yourself useful.
292
00:16:26,296 --> 00:16:27,496
Man.
293
00:16:27,898 --> 00:16:29,098
"Dear Victor...
294
00:16:30,333 --> 00:16:32,600
"sorry to hear about your gums.
295
00:16:32,736 --> 00:16:34,336
"Hope this will help.
296
00:16:34,704 --> 00:16:36,171
Your pal, Bennett."
297
00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:40,042
- Who's Bennett?
- You met him. Sizzler on Western.
298
00:16:40,143 --> 00:16:42,943
Oh, yeah. Big guy?
Nearly broke a rib?
299
00:16:43,113 --> 00:16:44,713
That's him. How much?
300
00:16:45,615 --> 00:16:46,815
Uh, 32.
301
00:16:49,786 --> 00:16:51,853
Dollars? Thirty-two dollars?
302
00:16:52,656 --> 00:16:55,458
You know what $32 gets you
at a periodontist these days?
303
00:16:55,559 --> 00:16:57,960
- Why? What's wrong with your gums?
- Nothin'
304
00:16:58,061 --> 00:17:01,197
- I'm just saying, if there was.
- You're healthy.
305
00:17:01,298 --> 00:17:03,499
Let me explain something to you.
I provide a service.
306
00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:06,235
They send some cash.
It renews their savior experience.
307
00:17:06,336 --> 00:17:10,072
It's like when you adopt an overseas orphan,
only I'm right here.
308
00:17:10,173 --> 00:17:13,476
Besides, if I don't come up
with my monthly three grand...
309
00:17:13,577 --> 00:17:16,245
those vipers at St. Anthony's
won't let me in to feed her.
310
00:17:16,346 --> 00:17:17,613
- Fuck!
- What?
311
00:17:18,181 --> 00:17:19,381
I'm light.
312
00:17:19,749 --> 00:17:21,216
Again, Mr. Mancini?
313
00:17:22,486 --> 00:17:23,953
You're light again.
314
00:17:25,255 --> 00:17:26,455
Not to worry.
315
00:17:27,491 --> 00:17:31,624
I'm sure there's room
at the new state facility in Clancy.
316
00:17:32,963 --> 00:17:35,363
I hear they do a lovely porridge.
317
00:17:35,999 --> 00:17:37,732
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
318
00:17:39,870 --> 00:17:41,070
You got a pen?
319
00:17:48,044 --> 00:17:50,044
God bless you, Mr. Mancini.
320
00:17:58,255 --> 00:18:01,388
Come on.
It's eggplant parm from Gallini's.
321
00:18:01,491 --> 00:18:03,958
You love their eggplant. One bite.
322
00:18:04,227 --> 00:18:05,427
I'm not hungry.
323
00:18:07,097 --> 00:18:10,800
So, what are you doing? What's -
What's going on? Why are you-
324
00:18:10,901 --> 00:18:12,101
You're crying.
325
00:18:14,170 --> 00:18:16,903
What do you expect, Artie?
I'm dying.
326
00:18:17,307 --> 00:18:19,642
You're not dying. You're not dying.
327
00:18:19,743 --> 00:18:21,710
For Pete's sake, look at me.
328
00:18:21,811 --> 00:18:26,011
Half the time I don't even know
who I'm talking to anymore.
329
00:18:26,883 --> 00:18:28,083
Fine. Whatever.
330
00:18:29,753 --> 00:18:32,820
I've had enough
of this ridiculous planet.
331
00:18:35,425 --> 00:18:36,625
It's Victor.
332
00:18:39,195 --> 00:18:40,462
I can't bear it.
333
00:18:42,832 --> 00:18:45,099
- He has to know.
- Know what?
334
00:18:46,603 --> 00:18:48,003
Who he comes from.
335
00:18:48,705 --> 00:18:51,974
You said his father was a traveling salesman
from Norway with Tourette's.
336
00:18:52,075 --> 00:18:55,678
- I had to tell him something.
- You mean-You mean he's not?
337
00:18:55,779 --> 00:18:57,246
Of course he's not.
338
00:18:59,783 --> 00:19:00,983
You, uh...
339
00:19:02,919 --> 00:19:05,221
You have to tell him the truth, Ida.
340
00:19:05,322 --> 00:19:07,189
He's got a right to know.
341
00:19:07,390 --> 00:19:09,857
I've been trying for months now...
342
00:19:10,026 --> 00:19:14,930
but he so rarely comes to visit, and when
he does, I can't bring myself to say it.
343
00:19:15,031 --> 00:19:16,698
Listen to me now, Ida.
344
00:19:17,567 --> 00:19:20,669
It's very important that Victor
knows who he comes from...
345
00:19:20,770 --> 00:19:22,837
other than just, you know...
346
00:19:23,306 --> 00:19:24,506
you.
347
00:19:25,308 --> 00:19:27,376
- You really think so?
- Absolutely.
348
00:19:27,477 --> 00:19:30,446
Let me call him. I bet you
I could get him here lickety-split.
349
00:19:30,547 --> 00:19:33,182
Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no.
I couldn't face that. No.
350
00:19:33,283 --> 00:19:36,816
Well... You can tell me then.
I won't say a word.
351
00:19:37,087 --> 00:19:39,288
Attorney - client privilege and all.
352
00:19:39,389 --> 00:19:41,922
But, Artie, I really can't do that.
353
00:19:42,125 --> 00:19:43,325
Why not?
354
00:19:46,029 --> 00:19:49,162
'Cause I'm not even sure who you really are.
355
00:19:52,202 --> 00:19:54,802
Oh, I'm sorry, Artie.
I have to go.
356
00:19:56,906 --> 00:19:58,373
- Hey.
- Hi, Tito.
357
00:20:04,347 --> 00:20:07,082
Do you think she'll take you back?
She won't, you know.
358
00:20:07,183 --> 00:20:10,516
Pretty women
are narcissistic and unforgiving.
359
00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:11,920
You're pretty.
360
00:20:14,324 --> 00:20:17,526
I might have known.
You're too weak. You're too ordinary.
361
00:20:17,627 --> 00:20:20,429
This work requires vision.
It requires fortitude.
362
00:20:20,530 --> 00:20:22,698
What work?
You don't do any work.
363
00:20:22,799 --> 00:20:24,932
All you do is get in trouble.
364
00:20:25,602 --> 00:20:27,869
Don't you see? You are my work.
365
00:20:27,971 --> 00:20:30,439
All the political acts,
all the subversive happenings-
366
00:20:30,540 --> 00:20:32,608
They're all designed to...
to open your eyes.
367
00:20:32,709 --> 00:20:36,412
- Where's my father?
- Well, he's probably back in Oslo by now...
368
00:20:36,513 --> 00:20:40,049
offending his poor customers
with those unfortunate outbursts.
369
00:20:40,150 --> 00:20:41,550
I want to see him.
370
00:20:42,485 --> 00:20:46,352
He doesn't want you, Victor.
Why do you think he left?
371
00:20:49,125 --> 00:20:50,392
We need to talk.
372
00:20:51,394 --> 00:20:54,763
I think it's time we consider
a move to the second floor.
373
00:20:54,864 --> 00:20:57,597
The second floor?
No. Absolutely not.
374
00:20:58,168 --> 00:21:00,803
Mr. Mancini, your mother suffers
from a form of dementia...
375
00:21:00,904 --> 00:21:03,706
that's been exacerbated
by years of substance abuse.
376
00:21:03,807 --> 00:21:05,474
Dr. Fielding said it was Alzheimer's.
377
00:21:05,575 --> 00:21:09,278
There's a reason Dr. Fielding's
playing mini golf in Boca right now.
378
00:21:09,379 --> 00:21:10,579
Can we walk?
379
00:21:13,316 --> 00:21:15,317
Hey, did you try Aricept or Cognex?
380
00:21:15,418 --> 00:21:17,620
How would you know
about those drugs, Mr. Mancini?
381
00:21:17,721 --> 00:21:20,022
What about a glutamine blocker
like Memantine?
382
00:21:20,123 --> 00:21:23,926
We've tried everything. Once they've stopped
eating, the course is fairly predictable.
383
00:21:24,027 --> 00:21:26,795
Couldn't you force-feed her?
I'd be happy to help.
384
00:21:26,896 --> 00:21:28,829
I understand how you feel.
385
00:21:29,032 --> 00:21:32,901
Facing the possibility of a loved one's
demise can be very traumatic.
386
00:21:33,002 --> 00:21:36,905
Oh, no. I want her to die, just not
until I find out who my family is.
387
00:21:37,006 --> 00:21:39,975
Perhaps we should talk later
when you're not so upset.
388
00:21:40,076 --> 00:21:41,434
- You're absolutely right.
What time do
389
00:21:41,535 --> 00:21:43,078
you get off?
- You don't have to do that.
390
00:21:43,179 --> 00:21:45,014
- What?
- Try to have sex with me.
391
00:21:45,115 --> 00:21:46,382
Oh, I really do.
392
00:21:47,050 --> 00:21:49,952
Well, I suppose that's flattering,
but I think we'd better not.
393
00:21:50,053 --> 00:21:53,653
- Why?
- Because you're just sad and lonely maybe.
394
00:21:54,758 --> 00:21:56,992
And you're realizing for the first time
that your mother...
395
00:21:57,093 --> 00:21:59,493
probably won't be getting better.
396
00:22:00,330 --> 00:22:04,366
And sleeping with me isn't gonna
change any of that, now, is it?
397
00:22:04,467 --> 00:22:06,334
Only one way to find out.
398
00:22:06,436 --> 00:22:08,236
Good night, Mr. Mancini.
399
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:11,440
Hey.
400
00:22:12,809 --> 00:22:15,844
There's a little piece missing
from your ear.
401
00:22:15,945 --> 00:22:17,878
- I was clawed.
- Clawed?
402
00:22:18,081 --> 00:22:19,548
- By what?
- A lynx.
403
00:22:19,649 --> 00:22:21,150
- A lynx?
- It's like a bobcat.
404
00:22:21,251 --> 00:22:23,518
- I know what a lynx is.
- Oh.
405
00:22:25,755 --> 00:22:27,222
You lie a lot, huh?
406
00:22:27,824 --> 00:22:29,024
I guess.
407
00:22:38,768 --> 00:22:41,336
- You hurt me, Colin.
- Eva. I'm really not up to this.
408
00:22:41,437 --> 00:22:43,405
You touched me in my private place.
409
00:22:43,506 --> 00:22:45,274
Would you stop saying that?
410
00:22:45,375 --> 00:22:48,343
You said that it was just
a little game, a secret game...
411
00:22:48,444 --> 00:22:51,513
and then you put
your big man thing inside me!
412
00:22:51,614 --> 00:22:52,814
Okay, listen.
413
00:22:59,722 --> 00:23:01,722
Fine. You got me. I did it.
414
00:23:04,127 --> 00:23:06,327
- You admit it?
- Absolutely.
415
00:23:06,663 --> 00:23:10,263
I boned you silly.
Stuck it in every chance I got.
416
00:23:10,733 --> 00:23:13,933
After all these years,
you finally admit it!
417
00:23:14,737 --> 00:23:17,873
That's right. Now if you'll excuse me,
you got some pimento loaf in there.
418
00:23:17,974 --> 00:23:21,210
- It's not doing you any favors.
- And you're not sorry?
419
00:23:21,311 --> 00:23:23,912
Eva, baby, little sis,
of course I'm sorry.
420
00:23:24,013 --> 00:23:26,248
I was a wretched, disgusting horn dog.
421
00:23:26,349 --> 00:23:29,718
But you were such a hot tamale,
I couldn't control myself.
422
00:23:29,819 --> 00:23:31,552
Oh, look. Okay. Don't -
423
00:23:32,388 --> 00:23:34,857
Look, for Christ's sakes, don't do that.
Look, I'm sorry.
424
00:23:34,958 --> 00:23:38,393
I hurt your woo-woo,
but it was, like, 80 years ago.
425
00:23:38,494 --> 00:23:40,161
Can we please move on?
426
00:23:43,233 --> 00:23:44,433
Oh, Colin.
427
00:23:45,235 --> 00:23:47,102
Oh, Colin, I forgive you.
428
00:23:47,737 --> 00:23:49,337
I forgive you, Colin.
429
00:23:52,542 --> 00:23:55,477
- You can't nail your mom's doctor.
- Why not?
430
00:23:55,578 --> 00:23:58,313
'Cause later, when she hates you,
she might give her the wrong pills.
431
00:23:58,414 --> 00:24:01,583
Nah, she wouldn't do that. She took an oath.
Besides, now I have to fuck her.
432
00:24:01,684 --> 00:24:02,884
Why?
433
00:24:03,419 --> 00:24:05,988
Because she pinned me to the cork
like some stupid horny beetle specimen...
434
00:24:06,089 --> 00:24:07,990
without even breaking a sweat.
435
00:24:08,091 --> 00:24:10,292
And so now you want to
sleep with her for revenge?
436
00:24:10,393 --> 00:24:11,593
Yeah.
437
00:24:12,395 --> 00:24:16,165
I need her to keep my mom alive long enough
for me to get the truth out of her.
438
00:24:16,266 --> 00:24:18,901
Why? What do you think
you're gonna find out?
439
00:24:19,002 --> 00:24:21,837
That I come from somebody else too.
Somebody real. Somebody normal.
440
00:24:21,938 --> 00:24:26,241
After all the psychotic shit she put me
through, it's the least she can do, right?
441
00:24:26,342 --> 00:24:28,243
I'm supposed to lock him in, Victor.
442
00:24:28,344 --> 00:24:30,179
He was very specific about that.
443
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,481
You touch these stocks,
you're goin' in, Norm...
444
00:24:32,582 --> 00:24:35,751
and you won't be wearin'
that nifty sentry getup either.
445
00:24:35,852 --> 00:24:37,052
Dick.
446
00:24:38,121 --> 00:24:40,022
You shouldn't have done that.
447
00:24:40,123 --> 00:24:43,592
Now Charlie's gonna lobby
the town council to banish us again.
448
00:24:43,693 --> 00:24:47,760
- So, what'd you do this time?
- Forgot to wash this off.
449
00:24:47,897 --> 00:24:52,301
You ever think you might be fuckin' up
on purpose just to keep yourself in here?
450
00:24:52,402 --> 00:24:56,638
Maybe. All this time in the stocks,
I got myself almost a week sober.
451
00:24:56,739 --> 00:24:58,941
I wouldn't get too carried away
with this whole sobriety thing.
452
00:24:59,042 --> 00:25:01,977
Given to what your body's used to,
you're liable to explode.
453
00:25:02,078 --> 00:25:04,980
How 'bout you?
You start your fourth step yet?
454
00:25:05,081 --> 00:25:06,281
That's the, um-
455
00:25:07,150 --> 00:25:10,018
That's the searching, fearless inventory
of everything you did...
456
00:25:10,119 --> 00:25:13,822
and was done to you
in your sordid sex addict history.
457
00:25:13,923 --> 00:25:17,459
If you need some help, I'd be happy
to remind you of heinous shit you did.
458
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:18,893
Thanks. I'm good.
459
00:25:19,562 --> 00:25:21,029
Hey, wait a minute.
460
00:25:21,564 --> 00:25:23,697
If your mom already thinks...
461
00:25:24,300 --> 00:25:27,300
that you're Artie, or Fred,
or whoever...
462
00:25:27,870 --> 00:25:30,239
how are you gonna convince her
that you're really you?
463
00:25:30,340 --> 00:25:31,540
I'm not.
464
00:25:34,644 --> 00:25:35,827
Hi. I'm Victor.
465
00:25:35,853 --> 00:25:39,402
Dude, don't -don't -
Don't gild the lily, okay?
466
00:25:41,651 --> 00:25:43,318
- That's her?
- Yeah.
467
00:25:43,953 --> 00:25:46,020
She's young, for this place.
468
00:25:46,789 --> 00:25:49,322
- I know.
- And still kind of hot.
469
00:25:49,492 --> 00:25:50,692
Jesus!
470
00:25:51,761 --> 00:25:54,161
And she won't notice I'm not you?
471
00:25:54,297 --> 00:25:56,097
We're about to find out.
472
00:26:01,671 --> 00:26:05,338
Mrs. Mancini, I brought your son.
I brought Victor.
473
00:26:05,708 --> 00:26:06,908
No.
474
00:26:08,644 --> 00:26:11,044
- No. It's not.
- Yeah. Hi, Mom.
475
00:26:13,249 --> 00:26:14,516
It's Victor. Hi.
476
00:26:20,923 --> 00:26:22,123
Victor!
477
00:26:26,095 --> 00:26:28,228
- Is that really you?
- Yep.
478
00:26:28,364 --> 00:26:29,564
It really is.
479
00:26:33,336 --> 00:26:34,536
Oh, Victor.
480
00:26:36,706 --> 00:26:38,839
Mom, your hands are freezing.
481
00:26:40,576 --> 00:26:41,776
Dude?
482
00:26:43,479 --> 00:26:44,679
Oh, Victor.
483
00:26:46,315 --> 00:26:48,450
Hey, you know, in my experience...
484
00:26:48,551 --> 00:26:51,553
I have found
that these puzzles work best...
485
00:26:51,654 --> 00:26:54,387
if you find all the edge pieces first.
486
00:26:54,490 --> 00:26:55,957
Oh! Found a corner.
487
00:26:56,993 --> 00:27:00,726
Hey, wasn't there
something you were gonna tell him?
488
00:27:00,863 --> 00:27:02,596
- Huh?
- Wasn't there?
489
00:27:02,865 --> 00:27:04,065
Oh, yeah.
490
00:27:05,334 --> 00:27:07,734
I'm so happy you've come, Victor.
491
00:27:09,572 --> 00:27:13,439
I have so much to tell you.
I have so much to explain.
492
00:27:17,747 --> 00:27:18,947
Murray.
493
00:27:20,216 --> 00:27:22,349
This is between my son and I.
494
00:27:22,718 --> 00:27:25,687
- I think maybe I should stay here because-
- Go!
495
00:27:25,788 --> 00:27:29,255
- But you know, I don't think-
- Murray, please.
496
00:27:35,531 --> 00:27:37,398
My boy. My beautiful boy.
497
00:27:38,367 --> 00:27:40,300
- Are you Victor?
- Yeah.
498
00:27:41,304 --> 00:27:44,171
What'd I...
What... What'd I do to you?
499
00:27:44,774 --> 00:27:45,974
Nothing.
500
00:27:49,879 --> 00:27:51,079
I'm so scared.
501
00:28:04,260 --> 00:28:07,460
That ceiling
was once covered with angels...
502
00:28:08,898 --> 00:28:10,866
but they painted over them.
503
00:28:10,967 --> 00:28:13,500
- Some papal decree.
- Vatican II.
504
00:28:16,072 --> 00:28:19,072
- Are you Catholic?
- My mom, she's from-
505
00:28:19,275 --> 00:28:20,475
Italy. I know.
506
00:28:26,015 --> 00:28:28,682
I think I've found a way to save her.
507
00:28:29,819 --> 00:28:33,086
But it's going to require
your participation.
508
00:28:33,422 --> 00:28:36,689
It's an experimental procedure.
It's illegal.
509
00:28:37,293 --> 00:28:39,428
I can't even guarantee it will work.
510
00:28:39,529 --> 00:28:41,797
In order to attempt this procedure...
511
00:28:41,898 --> 00:28:44,166
I'm going to need some embryonic tissue.
512
00:28:44,267 --> 00:28:46,200
Okay. Ho-Hold on a second.
513
00:28:47,203 --> 00:28:50,906
It's difficult for me to be so direct,
but time is a factor.
514
00:28:51,007 --> 00:28:54,276
My mucosa's so thick,
you could stand a spoon in it.
515
00:28:54,377 --> 00:28:56,177
Are you fucking with me?
516
00:28:56,512 --> 00:28:59,181
Given the options available to us,
this is her only hope.
517
00:28:59,282 --> 00:29:02,349
The good news is
she's an ideal candidate.
518
00:29:02,685 --> 00:29:06,388
All she needs is a healthy,
genetically compatible donor.
519
00:29:06,489 --> 00:29:08,523
And-And you know what to do?
520
00:29:08,624 --> 00:29:11,708
I put myself through med school
working nights in a stem cell research lab.
521
00:29:11,794 --> 00:29:16,531
That's hot. But why-why would you
put yourself out like this for her?
522
00:29:16,632 --> 00:29:19,434
Your mother
has been an inspiration to me.
523
00:29:19,535 --> 00:29:21,068
She changed my life.
524
00:29:21,704 --> 00:29:26,108
I'd never be able to forgive myself
if I didn't do everything I could to save her.
525
00:29:26,209 --> 00:29:28,710
Are we talking about the same person?
526
00:29:28,811 --> 00:29:31,646
Let's just do this before I lose my nerve.
527
00:29:31,747 --> 00:29:32,947
H... Here?
528
00:29:34,317 --> 00:29:36,418
I can never see you outside of this place.
529
00:29:36,519 --> 00:29:39,052
This has nothing to do with love...
530
00:29:39,922 --> 00:29:42,655
or commitment,
or anything like that.
531
00:29:44,126 --> 00:29:45,926
I simply need your seed.
532
00:29:46,662 --> 00:29:49,164
You should know,
I might be a sex addict.
533
00:29:49,265 --> 00:29:51,798
Well, just do what comes naturally.
534
00:29:52,668 --> 00:29:55,170
But I've got almost three days
of sobriety here.
535
00:29:55,271 --> 00:29:56,471
All right, two.
536
00:29:58,007 --> 00:29:59,207
Don't worry.
537
00:30:00,009 --> 00:30:05,409
With a little luck, your mother will soon
be just the same as she always was.
538
00:30:12,054 --> 00:30:13,787
You couldn't get it up?
539
00:30:14,890 --> 00:30:17,993
- That's nice. A little louder.
- Didn't think that thing ever went down.
540
00:30:18,094 --> 00:30:22,097
I'd like to see you cop a chubby
with the holy savior staring down your crack.
541
00:30:22,198 --> 00:30:23,931
Wow, man. This is huge.
542
00:30:25,234 --> 00:30:28,236
- What are you talking about?
- Look, who knows?
543
00:30:28,337 --> 00:30:31,706
Maybe you're really into her,
maybe you're just bottoming out...
544
00:30:31,807 --> 00:30:34,376
but the fact
that some part of you resisted...
545
00:30:34,477 --> 00:30:37,077
turning this into the usual nothing?
546
00:30:38,447 --> 00:30:40,815
Well, I'm calling that a really big step.
547
00:30:40,916 --> 00:30:46,321
You know, I think I liked you better
when you were just jerkin' off all the time.
548
00:30:46,422 --> 00:30:48,955
Hey, did you find out who I am yet?
549
00:30:49,292 --> 00:30:51,693
I'm trying, but, uh,
all she wants to do is hang out.
550
00:30:51,794 --> 00:30:53,194
- Really?
- Yeah.
551
00:30:54,297 --> 00:30:55,497
Check this out.
552
00:30:57,466 --> 00:30:59,878
You putz, put that away.
Put that away, man.
553
00:30:59,904 --> 00:31:00,802
Just check out-
554
00:31:00,803 --> 00:31:03,403
No, check out... check out that one.
555
00:31:04,774 --> 00:31:06,107
- Yeah.
- Where?
556
00:31:07,343 --> 00:31:10,645
- Isn't that your number?
- My parents are renting out my room.
557
00:31:10,746 --> 00:31:13,915
- But you still live there.
- I think that's sort of the point.
558
00:31:14,016 --> 00:31:17,986
Unless the date on that is 1763,
you guys are so fucked.
559
00:31:18,087 --> 00:31:19,554
- Promise?
- Yeah.
560
00:31:21,123 --> 00:31:23,656
Wasn't there anything in her diary?
561
00:31:25,761 --> 00:31:28,028
- Huh? What?
- No, she didn't.
562
00:31:32,468 --> 00:31:34,535
- God! Come on.
- Oh, shit.
563
00:31:34,870 --> 00:31:36,270
Thank you so much.
564
00:31:38,874 --> 00:31:41,607
- Take it.
- No, no, no. You take it.
565
00:31:43,713 --> 00:31:46,780
- Afternoon, Your Loftiness.
- 'Sup, lord?
566
00:31:47,850 --> 00:31:51,052
Spare me your dissembling
and relinquish the forbidden gazette.
567
00:31:51,153 --> 00:31:53,255
Okay! You're doin'
an accent thing now, aren't you?
568
00:31:53,356 --> 00:31:57,025
- He is, right?
- Yeah, I thought we were supposed to be Americans.
569
00:31:57,126 --> 00:31:59,094
I was reared in Yorkshire
by the good friars...
570
00:31:59,195 --> 00:32:01,963
and only recently made the voyage
to the New World.
571
00:32:02,064 --> 00:32:04,432
Come on, Charlie. You went to
Country Day with my cousin Todd.
572
00:32:04,533 --> 00:32:06,801
Shh, shh. Dude, dude. He's trying to-
573
00:32:06,902 --> 00:32:09,871
You know something? You two are
this close to getting banished.
574
00:32:09,972 --> 00:32:12,140
- You hear me? This close.
- What sayest thou?
575
00:32:12,241 --> 00:32:14,943
- Give me the goddamn newspaper!
- What's a newspaper?
576
00:32:15,044 --> 00:32:18,880
Yeah, Charlie. I don't think they
get invented for, like, another 80 years.
577
00:32:18,981 --> 00:32:20,914
That's good. You're funny.
578
00:32:21,751 --> 00:32:24,185
You both-
You think you're so funny.
579
00:32:24,286 --> 00:32:28,086
Always making fun of anything
that means anything to-
580
00:32:35,731 --> 00:32:37,098
Oh, shit.
581
00:32:38,567 --> 00:32:39,767
Jesus.
582
00:32:40,636 --> 00:32:41,714
Take him to the stocks.
583
00:32:41,740 --> 00:32:44,364
This shall be evidence
in your banishment proceedings.
584
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:45,640
No! Fuck.
585
00:32:49,478 --> 00:32:53,048
Hey, Denny! Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. What diary?
586
00:32:53,449 --> 00:32:55,784
You said,
"Wasn't there anything in her diary?"
587
00:32:55,885 --> 00:33:00,121
Oh, shit, dude, yeah. Your mom has
a total diary. She wants you to read it.
588
00:33:00,222 --> 00:33:03,458
- I don't know, dude. That's her diary.
- Hey, will you shut up?
589
00:33:03,559 --> 00:33:07,226
- Where is it?
- I think she sent it to your place.
590
00:33:26,348 --> 00:33:27,548
Oh. Oh, fuck!
591
00:33:30,319 --> 00:33:31,519
Fuck!
592
00:33:32,388 --> 00:33:36,191
I'd have thought a purely physical encounter
would be right up your alley.
593
00:33:36,292 --> 00:33:38,493
- It usually is.
- Then what's the problem?
594
00:33:38,594 --> 00:33:39,794
I don't know!
595
00:33:40,596 --> 00:33:44,466
Well, you'd better figure it out soon.
I can't ovulate forever.
596
00:33:44,567 --> 00:33:46,768
Hey, maybe-maybe I'm happy
with things the way they are.
597
00:33:46,869 --> 00:33:50,071
Maybe I like knowing she's not gonna
pop up at any moment and ruin my life.
598
00:33:50,172 --> 00:33:53,174
Maybe I don't want her back
the way she was.
599
00:33:53,275 --> 00:33:56,578
You don't want her to live.
You don't want her to die.
600
00:33:56,679 --> 00:33:59,647
- You don't know what you want.
- Sure I do. Sure I do.
601
00:33:59,748 --> 00:34:02,281
I want somebody who speaks Italian.
602
00:34:03,385 --> 00:34:05,452
Well, why didn't you say so?
603
00:34:07,189 --> 00:34:09,722
You might not think the best way...
604
00:34:10,192 --> 00:34:12,859
to spend your first day of freedom...
605
00:34:12,995 --> 00:34:15,328
after a lengthy incarceration...
606
00:34:15,731 --> 00:34:18,533
would be to immediately
resume stalking...
607
00:34:18,634 --> 00:34:20,167
the tranny hooker...
608
00:34:20,769 --> 00:34:22,737
who knocked out six teeth...
609
00:34:22,838 --> 00:34:25,206
and had you put away to begin with.
610
00:34:28,307 --> 00:34:29,707
That's how I roll.
611
00:34:29,879 --> 00:34:32,279
When I woke up in the hospital...
612
00:34:32,381 --> 00:34:34,448
an orderly named Terrence...
613
00:34:35,718 --> 00:34:38,118
wheeled me into my first meeting.
614
00:34:39,388 --> 00:34:42,588
All I can say is,
thank God for these rooms.
615
00:34:43,993 --> 00:34:45,960
The rooms have saved my life.
616
00:34:46,061 --> 00:34:47,661
The rooms are sacred.
617
00:34:52,635 --> 00:34:54,968
Come on. Give it to me. Perfect.
618
00:34:55,738 --> 00:34:58,138
- Here... we... go!
- Beautiful.
619
00:35:01,510 --> 00:35:02,710
What the fuck?
620
00:35:04,680 --> 00:35:05,947
Excuse me, miss?
621
00:35:06,682 --> 00:35:09,282
Excuse me?
That mole on your thigh.
622
00:35:09,585 --> 00:35:12,654
- Yeah?
- You might want to get that looked at.
623
00:35:12,755 --> 00:35:15,190
Melanoma's the most common
cancer for women...
624
00:35:15,291 --> 00:35:17,892
between 19 and 34, especially blondes.
625
00:35:17,993 --> 00:35:20,193
Couldn't get it up again, huh?
626
00:35:21,564 --> 00:35:24,831
- What makes you say that?
- Call it a hunch.
627
00:35:25,568 --> 00:35:28,768
Don't forget to draw
her ingrown hairs, man.
628
00:35:30,005 --> 00:35:32,740
Break out some cash
and bring her back here so I can finish.
629
00:35:32,841 --> 00:35:34,708
Let me see this, Picasso.
630
00:35:35,177 --> 00:35:37,844
Dude, you made her look too pretty...
631
00:35:38,314 --> 00:35:40,448
and her ass is way bigger than that.
632
00:35:40,549 --> 00:35:42,216
Here, let me see that.
633
00:35:56,599 --> 00:35:59,167
He's right.
My ass is bigger than that.
634
00:35:59,268 --> 00:36:00,468
No. It's not.
635
00:36:03,606 --> 00:36:06,006
- What's your name?
- I'm Denny.
636
00:36:06,575 --> 00:36:08,108
I'm Cherry Daiquiri.
637
00:36:10,646 --> 00:36:12,313
It's not my real name.
638
00:36:29,765 --> 00:36:32,298
Dude, if this shit gets you laid...
639
00:36:33,369 --> 00:36:34,569
I'm gonna-
640
00:36:35,371 --> 00:36:38,606
You know, dude, before you
harsh out the whole planet...
641
00:36:38,707 --> 00:36:41,342
maybe you ought to go ahead
and start your fourth step.
642
00:36:41,443 --> 00:36:45,310
I will. Absolutely.
As soon as I get something to eat.
643
00:36:48,951 --> 00:36:50,951
You wanna come with? Denny?
644
00:36:52,621 --> 00:36:55,288
Come on, man.
Let's get out of here.
645
00:37:35,030 --> 00:37:36,230
Oh, fuck.
646
00:38:06,161 --> 00:38:07,828
Quentin Fairweather...
647
00:38:08,230 --> 00:38:10,498
please meet your wife
at the cosmetics counter.
648
00:38:10,599 --> 00:38:12,399
Mr. Quentin Fairweather.
649
00:38:16,538 --> 00:38:19,071
You remembered Quentin Fairweather.
650
00:38:19,208 --> 00:38:20,408
Good boy.
651
00:38:21,910 --> 00:38:23,177
You look skinny.
652
00:38:25,981 --> 00:38:27,181
Come here.
653
00:38:28,917 --> 00:38:31,717
She's young, this one.
And pretty too.
654
00:38:31,887 --> 00:38:33,087
You like her?
655
00:38:34,556 --> 00:38:37,825
Don't tell me you don't,
'cause I saw you holding her hand.
656
00:38:37,926 --> 00:38:40,126
She's just another foster mom.
657
00:38:43,732 --> 00:38:44,999
Do you love her?
658
00:38:45,734 --> 00:38:46,934
No.
659
00:38:49,571 --> 00:38:50,838
Do you hate her?
660
00:38:51,573 --> 00:38:52,773
Um, yeah?
661
00:38:55,878 --> 00:38:58,046
That's right.
And how much do you hate her?
662
00:38:58,147 --> 00:38:59,347
Lots and lots.
663
00:39:15,030 --> 00:39:17,230
I think our work here is done.
664
00:39:17,332 --> 00:39:19,065
But... this one's nice.
665
00:39:19,968 --> 00:39:21,635
- What?
- She's nice.
666
00:39:23,438 --> 00:39:24,971
You're mine. Say it.
667
00:39:25,774 --> 00:39:27,107
Yours. I'm yours.
668
00:39:27,776 --> 00:39:29,576
- For?
- Ever and ever.
669
00:39:30,179 --> 00:39:31,379
That's right.
670
00:39:32,748 --> 00:39:34,281
Don't you forget it.
671
00:39:37,286 --> 00:39:41,589
- The little boy is approximately 10 years old.
- Where could he have gone?
672
00:39:41,690 --> 00:39:43,490
Where are you presently?
673
00:39:48,463 --> 00:39:50,730
Jesus! God! What have you done?
674
00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:54,635
Relax. I had to do this
to sneak it on to the bus.
675
00:39:54,736 --> 00:39:57,739
People see a big guy like me with a rock,
they get a little nervous.
676
00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:00,174
Think I could stay with you for a while?
677
00:40:00,275 --> 00:40:03,808
- Just till I find a place?
- No. Absolutely not.
678
00:40:04,012 --> 00:40:06,812
No way. Hey, what are you-What are you-
679
00:40:09,451 --> 00:40:10,651
Hey, hey!
680
00:40:11,620 --> 00:40:12,820
Shit, man.
681
00:40:17,059 --> 00:40:19,360
So you gonna let me in
on this rock thing?
682
00:40:19,461 --> 00:40:22,328
I collect one for every day of sobriety.
683
00:40:23,031 --> 00:40:25,211
Keeps the hands busy,
if you know what I mean.
684
00:40:25,237 --> 00:40:26,037
That's good.
685
00:40:26,101 --> 00:40:28,269
I was afraid
it might be something stupid.
686
00:40:28,370 --> 00:40:32,073
- So how'd you make out with Cherry Daiquiri?
- Oh! Her name is Beth.
687
00:40:32,174 --> 00:40:34,275
Oh, right. Did you fuck Beth?
688
00:40:34,376 --> 00:40:37,176
Where's the diary? Can I see the diary?
689
00:40:37,980 --> 00:40:40,580
It's in Italian.
Paige is translating it for me.
690
00:40:40,606 --> 00:40:41,507
Who's Paige?
691
00:40:41,583 --> 00:40:45,050
- Dr. Marshall.
- Oh, so she's "Paige" now. Hmm.
692
00:40:45,187 --> 00:40:48,222
And she speaks Italian too.
What is she, perfect?
693
00:40:48,323 --> 00:40:50,558
You know something?
I think maybe she is.
694
00:40:50,659 --> 00:40:52,526
Hey! Where are you going?
695
00:40:52,761 --> 00:40:56,428
I'm gonna find out who my father is.
See you later.
696
00:40:59,902 --> 00:41:02,937
That's him. He came to my potluck,
didn't bring a dish.
697
00:41:03,038 --> 00:41:06,571
- He beat my sister almost to death.
- That's me.
698
00:41:09,778 --> 00:41:11,378
I think that's sweet-
699
00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:14,115
you giving them closure like that.
700
00:41:14,216 --> 00:41:15,683
So did you read it?
701
00:41:16,218 --> 00:41:17,418
Yes.
702
00:41:18,220 --> 00:41:21,222
And I'm afraid what I have to tell you
may be disappointing.
703
00:41:21,323 --> 00:41:24,158
It seems she was delusional
much earlier than you thought.
704
00:41:24,259 --> 00:41:25,859
What about my father?
705
00:41:26,261 --> 00:41:30,331
According to this, she got pregnant with you
when she was in her late 30s.
706
00:41:30,432 --> 00:41:33,701
She'd been living here for some time,
but went back for fertility treatments...
707
00:41:33,802 --> 00:41:36,037
at an experimental clinic in the Alps.
708
00:41:36,138 --> 00:41:38,339
So, what? He's some Italian doctor?
709
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:42,373
No. And this is where it
kind of goes off the deep end.
710
00:41:42,844 --> 00:41:44,779
According to your mother's journal...
711
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:47,481
this was about a year
after a collection...
712
00:41:47,582 --> 00:41:50,184
of religious relics
had gone missing in Rome.
713
00:41:50,285 --> 00:41:54,455
Six childless women were offered
genetic tissue from one of these relics.
714
00:41:54,556 --> 00:41:58,556
Five were a no-go
and the sixth became, apparently, you.
715
00:42:01,997 --> 00:42:03,464
What kind of relic?
716
00:42:03,999 --> 00:42:07,134
The relic, according to the journal,
was a sacred foreskin.
717
00:42:07,235 --> 00:42:09,136
Mummified, I would imagine.
718
00:42:09,237 --> 00:42:11,138
A foreskin? Whose foreskin?
719
00:42:11,239 --> 00:42:13,572
- The holy foreskin.
- Come on!
720
00:42:14,009 --> 00:42:15,342
It's all in here.
721
00:42:16,445 --> 00:42:18,412
So that would make me the son of-
722
00:42:18,513 --> 00:42:20,046
Jesus, more or less.
723
00:42:20,649 --> 00:42:23,116
But really more like a half clone.
724
00:42:23,285 --> 00:42:25,218
It's kind of sweet really.
725
00:42:26,455 --> 00:42:29,922
In her mind, you're literally
the Second Coming.
726
00:42:30,492 --> 00:42:32,625
- Dr. Marshall?
- Excuse me.
727
00:42:34,429 --> 00:42:36,362
Beatrice? Where you going?
728
00:42:37,766 --> 00:42:38,966
I know you.
729
00:42:40,869 --> 00:42:45,606
Yeah. Of course you do. What, did I give you
a wedgie or steal your cupcake or something?
730
00:42:45,707 --> 00:42:47,307
No. My son saved you.
731
00:42:48,510 --> 00:42:51,913
You were choking in a restaurant,
and he saved you.
732
00:42:52,014 --> 00:42:56,481
Secretly, I think Paul always
thought of himself as a coward...
733
00:42:56,585 --> 00:42:57,918
until that night.
734
00:42:58,620 --> 00:43:01,289
His wife was on the verge
of divorcing him.
735
00:43:01,390 --> 00:43:05,123
But when she saw what he did,
she fell back in love.
736
00:43:05,227 --> 00:43:06,560
It was a miracle.
737
00:43:07,229 --> 00:43:10,562
You have an enormous capacity
for love in you.
738
00:43:12,300 --> 00:43:14,300
I have a capacity for shit.
739
00:43:15,871 --> 00:43:19,738
It was a scam, lady.
I'm an evil, scheming douche bag.
740
00:43:20,008 --> 00:43:21,408
I know what I saw.
741
00:43:22,077 --> 00:43:25,313
- Uh-Come here! Let's go. Come on.
- Where are we going?
742
00:43:25,414 --> 00:43:27,415
Hey, let me ask you something.
743
00:43:27,516 --> 00:43:30,318
You don't think I'm
a good-hearted person, do you?
744
00:43:30,419 --> 00:43:32,553
No way, dude. You're an asshole.
745
00:43:32,654 --> 00:43:35,256
Thanks, man. Thanks.
Hey, what about this one?
746
00:43:35,357 --> 00:43:36,557
Eh-eh.
747
00:43:38,226 --> 00:43:40,594
This is how they drink beer in Europe.
748
00:43:40,695 --> 00:43:43,428
- From a slug trap?
- No, dude. Warm.
749
00:43:48,270 --> 00:43:50,603
- So what happened?
- Oh, yeah.
750
00:43:51,073 --> 00:43:53,541
So, you know,
I'm dragging her off to the chapel.
751
00:43:53,642 --> 00:43:57,144
My unit's enraged.
I'm thinking, "Here we go. Finally!"
752
00:43:57,245 --> 00:44:02,483
I'm so hot, I'm flashing dead kittens and
Mother Teresa just to keep from triggering.
753
00:44:02,584 --> 00:44:03,784
Hey.
754
00:44:05,387 --> 00:44:06,587
Hey.
755
00:44:07,456 --> 00:44:08,656
Over here.
756
00:44:13,128 --> 00:44:14,795
I want you to hear me.
757
00:44:18,033 --> 00:44:21,500
I want you moving
in perfect sync with my heart.
758
00:44:28,944 --> 00:44:30,144
There.
759
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:33,680
Isn't that better?
760
00:44:50,796 --> 00:44:51,996
Fuck.
761
00:44:54,269 --> 00:44:56,670
If you don't want to do this,
you could just say so.
762
00:44:56,771 --> 00:44:58,171
I want to do this.
763
00:44:58,773 --> 00:45:01,275
Believe me,
I'm dyin' I'm dyin' to do this.
764
00:45:01,376 --> 00:45:03,443
Well, then help me out here.
765
00:45:03,812 --> 00:45:07,848
Because apparently, you're capable of
having sex with everyone on the staff but me.
766
00:45:07,949 --> 00:45:11,786
Hey, look, I'm trying to ignore
the pressure and the old ladies...
767
00:45:11,887 --> 00:45:15,556
and the fact that I'm trying to fuck you
in a church to save my mom's brain.
768
00:45:15,657 --> 00:45:17,558
But so far it's not workin'
769
00:45:17,659 --> 00:45:20,992
- Why?
- Because, um, I think I-I think maybe-
770
00:45:23,465 --> 00:45:27,332
I can't fuck you 'cause
I want to like you... instead.
771
00:45:29,704 --> 00:45:33,037
Has it occurred to you
that perhaps the two...
772
00:45:33,175 --> 00:45:35,108
aren't mutually exclusive?
773
00:45:36,945 --> 00:45:38,145
You said that?
774
00:45:38,947 --> 00:45:39,843
Yeah.
775
00:45:40,569 --> 00:45:41,239
Wow!
776
00:45:41,383 --> 00:45:43,184
Maybe you're not so bad after all.
777
00:45:43,285 --> 00:45:45,119
No, dude. I am. I really am.
778
00:45:45,220 --> 00:45:49,087
I mean, the cloning thing?
That could totally be real.
779
00:45:49,558 --> 00:45:51,325
I saw this thing on Discovery.
780
00:45:51,426 --> 00:45:53,527
They've been tryin' it since the '60s.
781
00:45:53,628 --> 00:45:54,758
Do like this.
782
00:45:54,984 --> 00:45:56,786
Dude, stop doing that.
783
00:45:57,298 --> 00:45:59,033
Stop looking at me like that.
784
00:45:59,034 --> 00:46:00,701
You're creepin' me ou-
785
00:46:02,571 --> 00:46:03,771
Hi.
786
00:46:06,241 --> 00:46:07,441
Nice azaleas.
787
00:46:10,045 --> 00:46:11,578
Hey! Where you goin'
788
00:46:15,450 --> 00:46:18,250
What are you-
What are you lookin' at?
789
00:46:19,154 --> 00:46:21,021
Belonged to my Uncle Don.
790
00:46:21,289 --> 00:46:24,825
That is, until he got hammered last month
and drove his car through a tree.
791
00:46:24,926 --> 00:46:29,363
Those Mothers Against Drunk Driving
probably had a party or somethin'
792
00:46:29,464 --> 00:46:30,731
Who owns it now?
793
00:46:32,334 --> 00:46:33,667
Apparently, I do.
794
00:46:41,443 --> 00:46:42,643
Now?
795
00:46:43,445 --> 00:46:44,645
Not yet.
796
00:46:45,614 --> 00:46:47,347
Okay. You can open 'em.
797
00:46:49,517 --> 00:46:52,887
- The zoo? We're goin' to the zoo?
- That's right, kiddo.
798
00:46:52,988 --> 00:46:54,388
Give me your foot.
799
00:46:56,057 --> 00:46:57,324
What do you see?
800
00:46:58,460 --> 00:46:59,660
Animals.
801
00:47:00,528 --> 00:47:03,795
Prisoners, held captive
like us in a world...
802
00:47:05,233 --> 00:47:07,900
without risk, or struggle, or danger.
803
00:47:08,737 --> 00:47:11,572
The only difference
is that they can see the bars...
804
00:47:11,673 --> 00:47:14,140
that deny them all hope of escape.
805
00:47:16,244 --> 00:47:17,444
Until now.
806
00:47:22,083 --> 00:47:23,283
Mom?
807
00:47:31,092 --> 00:47:32,292
Mom!
808
00:48:11,666 --> 00:48:14,868
You go to bed, for Christ's sakes.
You're old. Get out.
809
00:48:14,969 --> 00:48:17,169
- Go to bed.
- So thoughtful.
810
00:48:29,718 --> 00:48:30,918
Mom? Mom.
811
00:48:33,855 --> 00:48:37,055
You scared me.
I didn't know where you were.
812
00:48:37,926 --> 00:48:39,126
Fuck!
813
00:48:39,994 --> 00:48:41,661
It wasn't my decision.
814
00:48:43,965 --> 00:48:46,498
I want her moved back downstairs...
815
00:48:47,302 --> 00:48:48,502
right now!
816
00:48:49,304 --> 00:48:53,607
Keep your voice down.
You're not even supposed to be here now.
817
00:48:53,708 --> 00:48:56,577
- Okay. Fine. I'll do this myself.
- Victor.
818
00:48:56,678 --> 00:48:57,878
Victor, please!
819
00:48:58,980 --> 00:49:00,847
She's better off up here.
820
00:49:01,249 --> 00:49:03,916
You said you were gonna do something.
821
00:49:04,119 --> 00:49:06,119
I couldn't do it by myself.
822
00:49:09,591 --> 00:49:12,591
Okay. Fine. Come here.
Let's go. Come on.
823
00:49:15,697 --> 00:49:17,897
What about here? Is this okay?
824
00:49:18,133 --> 00:49:20,000
- Come on.
- Oh, Victor!
825
00:49:20,201 --> 00:49:22,534
It's too late. My time's passed.
826
00:49:22,704 --> 00:49:25,105
All right. Okay.
Then let's try a stomach tube.
827
00:49:25,206 --> 00:49:27,873
I mean, that'll buy some time, right?
828
00:49:28,910 --> 00:49:32,813
- What? What's the matter?
- I don't know how to tell you this.
829
00:49:32,914 --> 00:49:35,047
- What?
- I made some calls.
830
00:49:37,252 --> 00:49:38,652
It all checks out-
831
00:49:40,288 --> 00:49:43,488
the clinic,
the specialists, even the relic.
832
00:49:43,591 --> 00:49:48,258
- What are you talking about?
- The theft was a huge deal in Rome.
833
00:49:48,563 --> 00:49:51,265
It was in the Vatican newspapers
and everything.
834
00:49:51,366 --> 00:49:54,168
Come on! Come on!
Stop with that shit! Stop!
835
00:49:54,269 --> 00:49:56,669
Here. You can check for yourself.
836
00:49:57,939 --> 00:50:01,542
In fact, I suggest you do,
just for your own peace of mind.
837
00:50:01,643 --> 00:50:04,545
You're not seriously telling me
you believe this shit?
838
00:50:04,646 --> 00:50:06,779
I don't know what to believe.
839
00:50:09,050 --> 00:50:13,220
I think it's better if we don't
see each other for a while.
840
00:50:13,321 --> 00:50:14,521
What? Why?
841
00:50:16,658 --> 00:50:19,560
It's not that
I don't have feelings for you.
842
00:50:19,661 --> 00:50:20,861
I do.
843
00:50:21,729 --> 00:50:24,365
It's just, I've seen the way
the patients look at you and-
844
00:50:24,466 --> 00:50:27,568
'Cause my crazy mother's journal
says I'm the holy clone...
845
00:50:27,669 --> 00:50:30,069
- Half clone.
- Of Jesus Christ?
846
00:50:30,839 --> 00:50:33,039
Paige, please-please, say I...
847
00:50:34,075 --> 00:50:36,808
Say it's 'cause I'm a...
a pervert...
848
00:50:37,312 --> 00:50:40,714
or... or a failure, or...
or just a really, really bad lay.
849
00:50:40,815 --> 00:50:42,748
But please, not over this.
850
00:50:43,451 --> 00:50:44,651
What the fuck?
851
00:50:45,987 --> 00:50:48,654
What are you doing?
Get out of here.
852
00:50:49,457 --> 00:50:53,761
I'm not who you think I am, okay?
So would you all please fuck off?
853
00:50:53,862 --> 00:50:55,729
Get the fuck out of here!
854
00:50:57,131 --> 00:50:59,933
- And he's so humble.
- I am not humble.
855
00:51:00,034 --> 00:51:02,603
I'm not even good.
Would a good person do this?
856
00:51:05,306 --> 00:51:06,573
What about this?
857
00:51:09,677 --> 00:51:10,877
- Hey!
- Hey!
858
00:51:12,580 --> 00:51:14,247
Okay, what about this?
859
00:51:38,506 --> 00:51:41,906
And faster than you can say,
"Jesus H. Clone"...
860
00:51:42,510 --> 00:51:44,110
I was alone... again.
861
00:51:54,889 --> 00:51:59,822
To reclaim my personal booth at the
cafรฉ of diminished expectations...
862
00:52:01,229 --> 00:52:04,629
all I had to do was answer
one simple question:
863
00:52:06,501 --> 00:52:08,301
What would Jesus not do?
864
00:52:11,439 --> 00:52:13,407
Don't kiss me on the mouth.
865
00:52:13,508 --> 00:52:15,409
Don't ask if you're hurting me.
866
00:52:15,510 --> 00:52:18,312
And if you hear the safe word,
stop what you're doing immediately.
867
00:52:18,413 --> 00:52:20,146
Do you have panty hose?
868
00:52:20,448 --> 00:52:22,316
You want me to rip you in drag?
869
00:52:22,417 --> 00:52:24,150
For your head.
870
00:52:25,587 --> 00:52:28,254
I need you to be a faceless attacker.
871
00:52:29,324 --> 00:52:31,057
Here, you'll need this.
872
00:52:31,392 --> 00:52:32,592
Whoa! Jesus.
873
00:52:33,895 --> 00:52:36,830
Um, couldn't I just, you know,
rough you up a little?
874
00:52:36,931 --> 00:52:40,901
No, absolutely not. The knife is
very important to my total experience.
875
00:52:41,002 --> 00:52:44,805
I mean, be careful with it, 'cause if you
so much as scratch me with that thing...
876
00:52:44,906 --> 00:52:47,508
I will have you in prison
before you can put your pants on.
877
00:52:47,609 --> 00:52:51,276
- Anything else?
- Yes. And this is very important.
878
00:52:51,579 --> 00:52:54,348
Whatever you do,
do not rape me on the bed.
879
00:52:54,449 --> 00:52:56,850
The bedspread is silk. It will spot.
880
00:52:56,951 --> 00:53:00,220
So rape me on the floor,
but not on the floor itself.
881
00:53:00,321 --> 00:53:03,323
On a towel on the floor,
but on the wood part, not the rug.
882
00:53:03,424 --> 00:53:04,957
- Got it?
- Got it.
883
00:53:08,429 --> 00:53:10,029
What's the safe word?
884
00:53:10,498 --> 00:53:11,698
Poodle.
885
00:53:24,412 --> 00:53:26,145
- Oh, God! No!
- Yeah.
886
00:53:26,414 --> 00:53:28,549
No, help me, please!
Not the bed! Not the bed!
887
00:53:28,650 --> 00:53:31,317
Or the rug! Or the...
Try the towel.
888
00:53:31,452 --> 00:53:33,453
- Remember? The towel?
- Oh, yeah.
889
00:53:33,554 --> 00:53:37,021
- Oh, ow! Ow, ow, ow, ow! Stop! Please!
- Right.
890
00:53:37,191 --> 00:53:39,524
Please, you're hurting me. Stop!
891
00:53:40,695 --> 00:53:41,895
Please!
892
00:53:42,930 --> 00:53:45,130
- Okay.
- Did I say "poodle"?
893
00:53:45,500 --> 00:53:46,434
No.
894
00:53:46,460 --> 00:53:49,261
No, then I'm not really
hurt, you fucking moron!
895
00:53:49,337 --> 00:53:53,137
- Wait a minute. Wait! Are those my hose?
- Uh, yeah.
896
00:53:53,341 --> 00:53:57,010
For Christ's sake, what kind of rapist
doesn't bring his own panty hose?
897
00:53:57,111 --> 00:54:00,447
- Look, I'm sorry, but the drugstore...
- No, don't apologize!
898
00:54:00,548 --> 00:54:02,783
Just demean me, you stupid shit!
899
00:54:02,884 --> 00:54:05,551
Oh. Okay.
That's better. Now hit me.
900
00:54:07,722 --> 00:54:10,824
- Do you want me to use the knife, or-
- No. Not with the...
901
00:54:10,925 --> 00:54:14,194
When you hit someone with a knife,
that's stabbing. Hit me!
902
00:54:14,295 --> 00:54:16,997
Ow! But not in the head,
you dumb ass!
903
00:54:17,098 --> 00:54:20,565
You're gonna give me a concussion.
Lower! Lower!
904
00:54:20,835 --> 00:54:24,237
How 'bout you shut the fuck up
and let me rape you my way?
905
00:54:24,338 --> 00:54:26,073
- How 'bout that?
- Well, you know?
906
00:54:26,174 --> 00:54:28,475
Well, if that's how you feel about it...
907
00:54:28,576 --> 00:54:31,645
you might want to take your little
friend there and run along home.
908
00:54:31,746 --> 00:54:34,114
Or your way's good.
We can do it your way.
909
00:54:34,215 --> 00:54:35,415
Come on!
910
00:54:37,351 --> 00:54:38,551
Okay. Okay. Okay.
911
00:54:39,353 --> 00:54:42,389
Hey, wait a minute.
Wait a second. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
912
00:54:42,490 --> 00:54:44,557
What about me? How 'bout me?
913
00:54:44,992 --> 00:54:50,692
Well, you can take care of yourself. Just put
your stuff on the towel when you're done.
914
00:54:54,068 --> 00:54:55,535
I've got to switch.
915
00:55:19,127 --> 00:55:20,594
Hey, wait a minute.
916
00:55:22,130 --> 00:55:23,997
Where did you put your...
917
00:55:24,732 --> 00:55:25,932
Hey!
918
00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:27,600
Poodle.
919
00:55:50,424 --> 00:55:53,624
As the body doth regurgitate
spoilt meats...
920
00:55:53,961 --> 00:55:58,294
so shalt the ungodly be cast
from the bosom of fair Dunsboro.
921
00:55:59,934 --> 00:56:02,903
We therefore commit this body
to the earth...
922
00:56:03,004 --> 00:56:05,871
to be turned once more
into corruption.
923
00:56:19,720 --> 00:56:20,920
Victor, I...
924
00:56:26,494 --> 00:56:29,227
Feel like I'm not a very good sponsor.
925
00:56:35,436 --> 00:56:36,636
Fuck! Oh, fuck!
926
00:56:37,572 --> 00:56:39,172
I'm not a lawn mower.
927
00:56:39,574 --> 00:56:40,774
Jesus.
928
00:56:43,444 --> 00:56:45,577
- Oops.
- What's the matter?
929
00:56:46,881 --> 00:56:48,081
Man overboard.
930
00:56:49,016 --> 00:56:51,816
What are you saying?
Are you saying...
931
00:56:52,153 --> 00:56:54,553
Oh. Well, it'll work its way out.
932
00:56:55,356 --> 00:56:56,556
Yeah?
933
00:56:57,792 --> 00:56:58,684
Yeah.
934
00:56:58,786 --> 00:57:00,460
Good luck with that.
935
00:57:06,067 --> 00:57:08,067
Hey! You changed your hair.
936
00:57:09,503 --> 00:57:12,639
Yeah, 'cause of what you said
about blondes getting skin cancer.
937
00:57:12,740 --> 00:57:16,140
- Good thinkin'
- You can never be too careful.
938
00:57:20,014 --> 00:57:22,481
Can I get some nuts, please? Nuts?
939
00:57:23,017 --> 00:57:24,217
How is she?
940
00:57:25,019 --> 00:57:29,122
- Who cares? I wasn't that into her anyway.
- No, I meant your mom.
941
00:57:29,223 --> 00:57:32,726
Oh. Yeah. Tell you the truth,
I wish she'd just die already.
942
00:57:32,827 --> 00:57:37,164
You need to go see her, dude. And go to
a meeting. You've barely been home in days.
943
00:57:37,265 --> 00:57:40,567
You're stalking a stripper,
and you're concerned about my sobriety?
944
00:57:40,668 --> 00:57:44,535
No, I'm not stalking her.
It's a healthy relationship.
945
00:57:45,573 --> 00:57:46,773
I love her.
946
00:57:47,575 --> 00:57:48,775
You what?
947
00:57:49,577 --> 00:57:50,777
I love her.
948
00:57:51,545 --> 00:57:52,745
And...
949
00:57:54,015 --> 00:57:55,882
we're moving in together.
950
00:57:56,017 --> 00:57:57,217
That's nice.
951
00:58:05,293 --> 00:58:08,693
You know,
she's not as attractive as you think.
952
00:58:21,575 --> 00:58:22,775
What?
953
00:58:27,214 --> 00:58:30,147
You're my best friend in the whole world.
954
00:58:30,685 --> 00:58:31,952
But this girl...
955
00:58:33,187 --> 00:58:36,923
she's, like, the only nice thing
that's ever happened to me.
956
00:58:37,024 --> 00:58:41,862
So you think you could resist the impulse
to piss all over it just this once?
957
00:58:41,963 --> 00:58:43,163
Sure.
958
00:58:43,898 --> 00:58:45,098
Thanks.
959
00:58:47,668 --> 00:58:52,606
I just hope you're cool paying a kid's
tuition with a bunch of wrinkly ones.
960
00:58:52,707 --> 00:58:54,374
Go see your mom, dude.
961
00:58:56,644 --> 00:58:59,512
And start your fourth step already.
Don't you think you've suffered enough?
962
00:58:59,613 --> 00:59:00,813
No.
963
00:59:07,955 --> 00:59:09,155
Ira.
964
00:59:12,226 --> 00:59:13,959
Ira and Tammy Hastings.
965
00:59:16,730 --> 00:59:18,130
Do you love him...
966
00:59:19,032 --> 00:59:20,232
Ira here?
967
00:59:21,702 --> 00:59:22,902
I do.
968
00:59:23,904 --> 00:59:25,171
Do you love her?
969
00:59:26,573 --> 00:59:27,773
- No.
- Ira!
970
00:59:30,111 --> 00:59:31,844
Okay. Yeah, I love her.
971
00:59:32,513 --> 00:59:34,713
Do you know how lucky you are?
972
00:59:37,051 --> 00:59:40,318
Poor Victor isn't very good
at loving people.
973
00:59:40,754 --> 00:59:43,087
I'm afraid that when I'm gone...
974
00:59:43,457 --> 00:59:48,190
there won't be anyone left in
the whole world who will love Victor.
975
01:00:04,812 --> 01:00:06,012
Hey.
976
01:00:06,814 --> 01:00:08,715
- Uh, yeah, thanks, but-
- For what?
977
01:00:08,816 --> 01:00:10,749
For, uh, lying back there.
978
01:00:10,918 --> 01:00:13,518
Look, I know I overreacted before...
979
01:00:14,522 --> 01:00:17,424
but the information
was a little startling at first.
980
01:00:17,525 --> 01:00:21,061
Now the prospect of dating
a clone deity seems kind of neat?
981
01:00:21,162 --> 01:00:23,495
If I could take it back I would.
982
01:00:25,966 --> 01:00:28,966
But the thing is, I wasn't lying in there.
983
01:00:29,203 --> 01:00:31,136
So if you feel anything...
984
01:00:31,605 --> 01:00:32,805
you know...
985
01:00:33,607 --> 01:00:35,442
remotely similar for me...
986
01:00:35,543 --> 01:00:38,943
then now would be
a really good time to say so.
987
01:00:53,928 --> 01:00:55,128
Pathetic.
988
01:00:55,930 --> 01:00:58,131
What the f-
What are you doing up?
989
01:00:58,232 --> 01:01:00,767
- You should be ashamed.
- What are you talking about?
990
01:01:00,868 --> 01:01:02,769
Go back to bed, for God's sake.
991
01:01:02,870 --> 01:01:05,772
That woman just placed her heart
in the palm of your hand...
992
01:01:05,873 --> 01:01:07,774
and you toss it aside
like some old shoe...
993
01:01:07,875 --> 01:01:10,542
because you can't muster the guts
to admit you feel the same way.
994
01:01:10,578 --> 01:01:12,711
Who says I feel the same way?
995
01:01:12,947 --> 01:01:15,315
Oh, please.
It's written all over you.
996
01:01:15,416 --> 01:01:20,120
You'd sooner let the woman you love walk out
the door than stand up and declare yourself.
997
01:01:20,221 --> 01:01:22,956
- Okay, whatever-
- What's that, Fred? Speak up!
998
01:01:23,057 --> 01:01:24,724
I'm not Fred! It's me!
999
01:01:25,559 --> 01:01:26,759
It's Victor.
1000
01:01:27,561 --> 01:01:29,961
And you're right... I'm pathetic.
1001
01:01:30,564 --> 01:01:32,198
I have sex with strangers...
1002
01:01:32,299 --> 01:01:35,969
because I'm incapable of doing it
with someone I actually like.
1003
01:01:36,070 --> 01:01:38,738
I can't even ask anyone out on a date...
1004
01:01:38,839 --> 01:01:41,808
'cause if it doesn't end up
in a high-speed chase, I get bored.
1005
01:01:41,909 --> 01:01:44,310
That's not what I'm talking about.
1006
01:01:44,411 --> 01:01:46,312
I've kept myself numb for so long...
1007
01:01:46,413 --> 01:01:49,816
that now I want to actually
feel something and I can't...
1008
01:01:49,917 --> 01:01:52,419
because no matter where I go,
no matter what I do...
1009
01:01:52,520 --> 01:01:55,053
I always end up back here with you.
1010
01:01:55,256 --> 01:01:58,189
Well, you say that like it's a bad thing.
1011
01:01:58,926 --> 01:02:00,659
I need to break up, Ma.
1012
01:02:01,929 --> 01:02:03,129
Now.
1013
01:02:03,931 --> 01:02:05,531
Before it's too late.
1014
01:02:06,667 --> 01:02:08,935
You were always so good at walking-
1015
01:02:09,036 --> 01:02:10,236
walking away.
1016
01:02:11,505 --> 01:02:12,705
Show me how.
1017
01:02:15,843 --> 01:02:17,043
All right.
1018
01:02:23,784 --> 01:02:25,117
Of course I will.
1019
01:02:27,988 --> 01:02:31,455
All I've ever wanted to do
is to make you happy.
1020
01:02:31,625 --> 01:02:33,158
You know that, Fred.
1021
01:02:37,198 --> 01:02:38,398
I'm hungry now.
1022
01:02:45,639 --> 01:02:47,607
Victor, don't play with your food.
1023
01:02:47,708 --> 01:02:49,641
Come on. Eat your hot dog.
1024
01:02:51,912 --> 01:02:53,112
Victor, no.
1025
01:02:54,181 --> 01:02:59,048
We cannot go to that park. It's late.
We have to make the state line.
1026
01:03:14,535 --> 01:03:15,735
Okay.
1027
01:03:16,537 --> 01:03:19,404
We got bus boys to clear the table, hon.
1028
01:03:20,074 --> 01:03:21,274
Charlene.
1029
01:03:22,610 --> 01:03:26,010
Come on, honey, toss it in.
We'll eat it later.
1030
01:03:28,249 --> 01:03:29,449
Victor.
1031
01:03:31,819 --> 01:03:33,819
Victor, what are you doing?
1032
01:03:34,355 --> 01:03:35,555
Victor.
1033
01:03:41,629 --> 01:03:42,829
Victor!
1034
01:03:43,797 --> 01:03:44,997
Victor. Victor.
1035
01:03:49,136 --> 01:03:50,336
Oh! He's okay.
1036
01:03:53,941 --> 01:03:55,141
Oh, boy.
1037
01:03:57,945 --> 01:03:59,145
Check this out.
1038
01:04:03,917 --> 01:04:05,117
I'm sorry.
1039
01:04:08,822 --> 01:04:10,022
Oh, my God.
1040
01:04:36,650 --> 01:04:37,850
No, no, no, no.
1041
01:04:43,424 --> 01:04:44,757
So, what is this?
1042
01:04:45,893 --> 01:04:47,226
I don't know yet.
1043
01:04:47,895 --> 01:04:50,797
You don't know what you're building, huh?
1044
01:04:50,898 --> 01:04:53,765
This isn't about getting something done.
1045
01:04:54,034 --> 01:04:57,434
It's about process.
I want to do something good.
1046
01:04:59,273 --> 01:05:02,709
Instead of just trying not
to do bad stuff all the time.
1047
01:05:02,810 --> 01:05:06,143
This is pretty ridiculous, dude,
even for you.
1048
01:05:10,951 --> 01:05:12,418
You need some help?
1049
01:05:13,354 --> 01:05:17,421
You can help if you want to,
but we don't need your help.
1050
01:05:18,525 --> 01:05:22,762
By "we," you mean that you and Cherry Daiquiri
have the project pretty much under control?
1051
01:05:22,863 --> 01:05:24,130
Her name's Beth.
1052
01:05:25,866 --> 01:05:29,769
And I'm sorry if our relationship
is triggering your abandonment issues.
1053
01:05:29,870 --> 01:05:31,203
Blah, blah, blah.
1054
01:05:43,016 --> 01:05:46,483
You have to forgive me, Victor.
I feel terrible.
1055
01:05:47,287 --> 01:05:48,487
Please.
1056
01:05:51,291 --> 01:05:52,624
I'll do anything.
1057
01:06:07,408 --> 01:06:10,310
If this was a churn
we'd have butter an hour ago.
1058
01:06:10,411 --> 01:06:11,611
It's not you.
1059
01:06:12,413 --> 01:06:14,146
Yes. I'm aware of that.
1060
01:06:16,417 --> 01:06:19,819
You sure you're all right? There's some
weird noises coming from your stomach.
1061
01:06:19,920 --> 01:06:22,822
Are you kidding me?
I'm having a wonderful time.
1062
01:06:22,923 --> 01:06:25,825
Did you go out
with Lord High Charlie yet?
1063
01:06:25,926 --> 01:06:27,126
No.
1064
01:06:27,928 --> 01:06:30,997
He asks me all the time,
but I always say no.
1065
01:06:31,098 --> 01:06:33,098
- Which is typical.
- Why?
1066
01:06:34,101 --> 01:06:35,968
Because he's sweet and...
1067
01:06:37,037 --> 01:06:38,504
I kind of like him.
1068
01:06:39,273 --> 01:06:41,940
But me,
I always go for the asshole.
1069
01:06:44,445 --> 01:06:45,645
No offense.
1070
01:06:46,447 --> 01:06:47,647
None taken.
1071
01:06:50,717 --> 01:06:52,250
Hey. We got company.
1072
01:06:55,055 --> 01:06:56,255
Hey.
1073
01:06:57,057 --> 01:06:59,959
Let me just rest
while I do it for a second.
1074
01:07:00,060 --> 01:07:01,260
See this goat?
1075
01:07:04,398 --> 01:07:05,731
Hey, little goat.
1076
01:07:06,400 --> 01:07:07,600
Hey.
1077
01:07:08,769 --> 01:07:10,236
You want some food?
1078
01:07:20,647 --> 01:07:22,114
Oh, no. No. No, no.
1079
01:07:24,351 --> 01:07:26,018
Not you. Not with you.
1080
01:07:26,420 --> 01:07:29,188
- Charlie-
- How could she do this to me?
1081
01:07:29,289 --> 01:07:33,292
- Shh, shh, shh.
- I was so completely into her. Now it's ruined!
1082
01:07:33,393 --> 01:07:35,795
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God!
- Shh, shh. Oh- Charlie-
1083
01:07:35,896 --> 01:07:37,763
- Oh, my God!
- Charlie.
1084
01:07:38,131 --> 01:07:40,664
Charlie? Don't do... Don't do that.
1085
01:07:41,134 --> 01:07:45,371
What is wrong with me? Why do I fall
for the wrong people every fucking time?
1086
01:07:45,472 --> 01:07:49,575
- It's not what you're thinking.
- Isn't that your penis in her hand?
1087
01:07:49,676 --> 01:07:50,943
Well, yeah, but-
1088
01:07:51,778 --> 01:07:55,181
You don't care about her.
You don't care about anything.
1089
01:07:55,282 --> 01:07:58,415
How could she possibly
find that appealing?
1090
01:07:58,886 --> 01:08:00,553
Human nature, I guess.
1091
01:08:01,188 --> 01:08:04,457
I thought she was so special.
And now look at her.
1092
01:08:04,558 --> 01:08:08,628
Charlie, don't say that. She's a...
She's a - She's a good girl, you know.
1093
01:08:08,729 --> 01:08:11,631
She was just saying
how much she liked you.
1094
01:08:11,732 --> 01:08:14,399
When?
While she was jerking you off?
1095
01:08:14,568 --> 01:08:16,901
Well, yeah. But this is nothing.
1096
01:08:17,838 --> 01:08:20,740
Believe me. I'm just
her little trip to the dark side.
1097
01:08:20,841 --> 01:08:24,308
You, you've got the guts
to hang it out there...
1098
01:08:24,978 --> 01:08:26,911
let her know how you feel.
1099
01:08:27,180 --> 01:08:30,082
That's -
That's more than I've ever done.
1100
01:08:30,183 --> 01:08:32,450
She sees that. She respects it.
1101
01:08:32,686 --> 01:08:35,286
- Clearly.
- Listen to me, Charlie.
1102
01:08:35,689 --> 01:08:39,892
The way I see it, you got one chance
to turn this thing around...
1103
01:08:39,993 --> 01:08:45,031
and that's to back on out of this barn
and forget you ever walked in here.
1104
01:08:45,132 --> 01:08:47,399
She deserves that. You both do.
1105
01:08:50,337 --> 01:08:51,870
- Really?
- Really.
1106
01:08:56,043 --> 01:08:57,243
Thank you.
1107
01:09:04,351 --> 01:09:08,351
Hello, everybody.
My name is Phil, and I'm a sex addict.
1108
01:09:08,455 --> 01:09:09,722
Hello. Hi, Phil.
1109
01:09:11,592 --> 01:09:12,792
Hold this.
1110
01:09:13,594 --> 01:09:15,995
Tonight's meeting is a step meeting.
1111
01:09:16,096 --> 01:09:19,763
Whether you just started
the step, or you're stuck.
1112
01:09:22,502 --> 01:09:24,502
What's the matter with you?
1113
01:09:24,638 --> 01:09:27,371
Anybody here working on a fourth step?
1114
01:09:28,709 --> 01:09:29,909
Anybody?
1115
01:09:32,512 --> 01:09:34,603
Swear to God,
you go in there with those losers,
1116
01:09:34,629 --> 01:09:36,229
and I will never get with you again.
1117
01:09:36,283 --> 01:09:40,016
Once you get started,
it actually feels good to get better...
1118
01:09:40,320 --> 01:09:43,653
because you can begin
to think about movin' on.
1119
01:09:47,227 --> 01:09:48,827
Hi. My name's Victor.
1120
01:09:50,864 --> 01:09:52,197
I'm a sex addict.
1121
01:09:53,066 --> 01:09:54,266
Hi, Victor.
1122
01:09:54,735 --> 01:09:55,935
This is Nico.
1123
01:09:58,372 --> 01:10:00,039
Yeah. My name is Nico.
1124
01:10:01,608 --> 01:10:04,075
And you people can all get fucked!
1125
01:10:19,292 --> 01:10:23,663
I've been trying to start my fourth step
for a really long time now.
1126
01:10:23,764 --> 01:10:26,766
You know, Victor,
sometimes the best place to start...
1127
01:10:26,867 --> 01:10:28,400
is at the beginning.
1128
01:10:29,069 --> 01:10:32,669
Try thinking back
to when you first lost your way.
1129
01:10:46,486 --> 01:10:47,686
Sorry.
1130
01:10:48,488 --> 01:10:53,221
If you're trying to make me feel bad,
you're doing a wonderful job.
1131
01:10:53,927 --> 01:10:56,594
Are you ta...
Are you talking to me?
1132
01:10:56,830 --> 01:10:58,830
You see anyone else around?
1133
01:11:13,814 --> 01:11:15,014
Hi.
1134
01:11:15,816 --> 01:11:17,016
- Hi.
- Hey.
1135
01:11:17,818 --> 01:11:19,485
Where you coming from?
1136
01:11:19,820 --> 01:11:22,087
Um, Thanksgiving with my mom...
1137
01:11:22,189 --> 01:11:24,090
at the state mental hospital.
1138
01:11:24,191 --> 01:11:25,791
Oh. And how was that?
1139
01:11:27,194 --> 01:11:28,394
Um-
1140
01:11:29,196 --> 01:11:30,996
Aww. That's okay, honey.
1141
01:11:31,198 --> 01:11:34,100
- It was kinda-
- That's what the circuit's here for.
1142
01:11:34,201 --> 01:11:35,401
Shit.
1143
01:11:37,003 --> 01:11:37,896
Maybe we...
1144
01:11:37,922 --> 01:11:40,598
That's the one drawback
of the bathroom pick-up.
1145
01:11:40,674 --> 01:11:42,607
Have you done this before?
1146
01:11:43,176 --> 01:11:46,579
Haven't you ever opened a door
on a train or a plane...
1147
01:11:46,680 --> 01:11:48,914
seen someone standing there
and thought...
1148
01:11:49,015 --> 01:11:51,615
"Why don't they just lock the door?"
1149
01:11:51,785 --> 01:11:54,687
I thought that was, like, an accident or-
1150
01:11:54,788 --> 01:11:58,055
There are no accidents
on the circuit, honey.
1151
01:11:58,291 --> 01:11:59,491
Circuit?
1152
01:12:01,995 --> 01:12:03,195
So...
1153
01:12:08,034 --> 01:12:10,936
- Late bloomer, huh?
- Sorry. Yeah, kind of.
1154
01:12:11,037 --> 01:12:12,704
Here, let me help you.
1155
01:12:22,415 --> 01:12:23,615
See?
1156
01:12:24,417 --> 01:12:26,750
All you needed was a jump start.
1157
01:12:38,832 --> 01:12:40,032
Feeling better?
1158
01:12:41,835 --> 01:12:43,035
Yeah.
1159
01:12:43,837 --> 01:12:45,037
Good.
1160
01:12:45,839 --> 01:12:48,741
But please don't think
this was anything special.
1161
01:12:48,842 --> 01:12:51,309
And don't forget to lock the door.
1162
01:12:53,814 --> 01:12:56,681
That is,
if you want it locked anymore.
1163
01:13:02,589 --> 01:13:04,457
Thank you for that, Richard.
1164
01:13:04,558 --> 01:13:06,959
We're here on scene
with Victor Mancini...
1165
01:13:07,060 --> 01:13:08,639
one of the builders
of this mystery rock structure.
1166
01:13:08,740 --> 01:13:10,463
...sitting there, naked and alone.
1167
01:13:10,564 --> 01:13:12,465
Hey, Victor! You're on TV.
1168
01:13:12,566 --> 01:13:14,297
All the people around
are wanting to know,
1169
01:13:14,323 --> 01:13:16,069
what exactly is this
structure going to be?
1170
01:13:16,070 --> 01:13:18,624
We don't know what it's gonna be.
It's about process.
1171
01:13:18,650 --> 01:13:19,864
What's it going to become?
1172
01:13:19,940 --> 01:13:24,540
Structure... the structure will continue
to evolve until the last rock is set.
1173
01:13:24,578 --> 01:13:26,399
People should bring one by.
1174
01:13:26,425 --> 01:13:28,973
They can alter the nature
of what it becomes.
1175
01:13:29,049 --> 01:13:32,818
So, there you have it.
Bring a rock and come on down, folks.
1176
01:13:32,919 --> 01:13:37,256
- This is Roger Fessenden, Action 2 News.
- In other news, people...-
1177
01:13:37,357 --> 01:13:40,090
Hey, that rock thing was a nice touch.
1178
01:13:40,660 --> 01:13:41,860
Thanks.
1179
01:13:48,668 --> 01:13:52,868
Hey, you think Jesus was
automatically good from the start?
1180
01:13:53,673 --> 01:13:55,975
I mean, you don't hear
much about the teen years.
1181
01:13:56,076 --> 01:13:59,378
Maybe Jesus was kind of a dick
for a while.
1182
01:13:59,479 --> 01:14:01,780
Then he started helping old ladies
cross the street...
1183
01:14:01,781 --> 01:14:03,983
and turning off people's headlights
and stuff...
1184
01:14:04,084 --> 01:14:07,319
and he just kinda grew
into the whole messiah thing.
1185
01:14:07,420 --> 01:14:09,555
I mean, that's not impossible, right?
1186
01:14:09,656 --> 01:14:11,523
- This is Jesus?
- Yeah.
1187
01:14:13,393 --> 01:14:14,593
I don't know.
1188
01:14:15,061 --> 01:14:16,994
Yeah. Of course you don't.
1189
01:14:17,564 --> 01:14:20,364
But if you read the New Testament...
1190
01:14:20,934 --> 01:14:24,236
especially some
of the Paul stuff in Galatians...
1191
01:14:24,337 --> 01:14:28,537
Jesus was all about the idea
that people are transformed...
1192
01:14:28,708 --> 01:14:31,677
not by being loved,
but by the act of loving somebody...
1193
01:14:31,778 --> 01:14:33,978
no matter how difficult it is.
1194
01:14:35,048 --> 01:14:37,683
So it only stands to reason
he could've developed this theory...
1195
01:14:37,784 --> 01:14:41,251
on his whole, you know,
personal savior journey.
1196
01:14:54,601 --> 01:14:55,801
Hello.
1197
01:14:57,837 --> 01:14:59,770
Yeah. Okay. I'll tell him.
1198
01:15:02,876 --> 01:15:05,809
Um, it's about your mom.
They moved her.
1199
01:15:08,715 --> 01:15:12,318
I brought you some pudding.
It's chocolate. It's your favorite.
1200
01:15:12,419 --> 01:15:14,752
Oh, that's very sweet, Victor...
1201
01:15:15,155 --> 01:15:16,955
but I'm not very hungry.
1202
01:15:17,624 --> 01:15:19,224
Well, you have to tr-
1203
01:15:19,926 --> 01:15:22,126
What did-What did you call me?
1204
01:15:22,895 --> 01:15:25,895
Victor.
That's still your name, isn't it?
1205
01:15:26,433 --> 01:15:28,166
Yeah. Yes, it is.
1206
01:15:32,605 --> 01:15:34,340
We have to talk, sweetie.
1207
01:15:34,441 --> 01:15:37,376
Forget about that now.
Just try and get some of this down.
1208
01:15:37,477 --> 01:15:40,679
There's something I've been meaning
to tell you for a long time.
1209
01:15:40,780 --> 01:15:44,583
Don't worry. I already know
what you had to do to get me.
1210
01:15:44,684 --> 01:15:45,884
You do?
1211
01:15:46,920 --> 01:15:51,320
I know you came from Italy
impregnated by the sacred foreskin.
1212
01:15:51,491 --> 01:15:52,691
The what?
1213
01:15:53,526 --> 01:15:56,993
You wrote it in Italian
so I wouldn't read it...
1214
01:15:57,230 --> 01:15:59,632
but Dr. Marshall told me the truth.
1215
01:15:59,733 --> 01:16:02,866
I know who I am,
and I know I can save you.
1216
01:16:04,504 --> 01:16:07,104
What the hell are you talking about?
1217
01:16:08,375 --> 01:16:11,708
I stole you from a stroller
in Waterloo, Iowa.
1218
01:16:12,912 --> 01:16:16,148
Mom, you don't have to-
you don't have to lie anymore.
1219
01:16:16,249 --> 01:16:17,449
Who's lying?
1220
01:16:18,251 --> 01:16:22,184
You were at the Cadillac Bowling Alley
on LaPorte Road.
1221
01:16:23,056 --> 01:16:24,256
Wh...
1222
01:16:26,425 --> 01:16:28,425
You're saying that you, uh-
1223
01:16:28,962 --> 01:16:32,629
You're saying you're not-
that you're not my, uh...
1224
01:16:34,501 --> 01:16:36,034
What are you saying?
1225
01:16:37,437 --> 01:16:39,504
You're saying you're not my-
1226
01:16:41,841 --> 01:16:43,308
That you're not my-
1227
01:16:49,282 --> 01:16:50,482
Mom.
1228
01:16:51,351 --> 01:16:52,551
Hey.
1229
01:16:53,353 --> 01:16:54,553
Mom.
1230
01:16:55,221 --> 01:16:56,421
Mom. Mom!
1231
01:16:57,557 --> 01:16:58,757
Mom!
1232
01:16:59,559 --> 01:17:00,892
Help! Help! Help!
1233
01:17:03,263 --> 01:17:04,463
Ida?
1234
01:17:05,932 --> 01:17:07,132
Ida?
1235
01:17:07,934 --> 01:17:10,001
She's choking. I choked her.
1236
01:17:11,204 --> 01:17:13,105
She denied my...
my birth origins.
1237
01:17:13,206 --> 01:17:15,274
She made up some story about Iowa.
1238
01:17:15,375 --> 01:17:16,842
Your birth origins?
1239
01:17:19,512 --> 01:17:20,557
Live!
1240
01:17:20,783 --> 01:17:21,637
Live!
1241
01:17:23,016 --> 01:17:25,283
I command you to live! Live!
1242
01:17:25,785 --> 01:17:27,786
I'm afraid
there's been a misunderstanding.
1243
01:17:27,887 --> 01:17:29,587
Live. Live.
1244
01:17:40,366 --> 01:17:41,699
You're a patient?
1245
01:17:42,134 --> 01:17:43,084
Yeah.
1246
01:17:43,410 --> 01:17:45,059
What the fuck, man?
1247
01:17:48,108 --> 01:17:49,775
Is she okay? Is she...
1248
01:17:51,511 --> 01:17:52,711
Oh, God.
1249
01:17:55,248 --> 01:17:56,448
Is she-
1250
01:17:59,051 --> 01:18:01,451
What have I...
What have I done?
1251
01:18:13,233 --> 01:18:14,700
We don't need this.
1252
01:18:15,568 --> 01:18:16,768
But we're lost.
1253
01:18:17,570 --> 01:18:19,970
We're not lost, we're pioneers...
1254
01:18:20,073 --> 01:18:22,975
blazing a trail through the new frontier.
1255
01:18:23,076 --> 01:18:25,244
And if you look very closely...
1256
01:18:25,345 --> 01:18:28,580
you'll see an opportunity
to overcome your fear.
1257
01:18:28,681 --> 01:18:32,014
- How do we know which way to go?
- Come here.
1258
01:18:32,352 --> 01:18:33,552
Come on.
1259
01:18:35,455 --> 01:18:37,055
Okay. Take the wheel.
1260
01:18:37,490 --> 01:18:38,690
Good.
1261
01:18:39,492 --> 01:18:41,292
And listen very closely.
1262
01:18:41,928 --> 01:18:45,330
'Cause nothing worth having
comes without a risk.
1263
01:18:45,431 --> 01:18:48,233
'Cause I won't always
be around to nag you.
1264
01:18:48,334 --> 01:18:52,401
'Cause sometimes it's not important
which way you jump...
1265
01:18:52,639 --> 01:18:54,006
just that you jump.
1266
01:18:54,031 --> 01:18:54,840
Make a turn.
1267
01:18:54,841 --> 01:18:57,308
Victor, I know it was an accident.
1268
01:18:57,644 --> 01:19:00,946
Let's be on the safe side.
How 'bout we get you out of here?
1269
01:19:01,047 --> 01:19:04,047
Victor. Come on.
We don't have much time.
1270
01:19:04,684 --> 01:19:07,586
- You're not even really a doctor, are you?
- Technically, no.
1271
01:19:07,687 --> 01:19:11,123
- All that crap about stem cells and curing my mother?
- Experimental, yes.
1272
01:19:11,224 --> 01:19:14,226
- But it might have worked.
- What about the diary?
1273
01:19:14,327 --> 01:19:15,927
Okay, that I made up.
1274
01:19:16,329 --> 01:19:17,529
You mean you-
1275
01:19:18,331 --> 01:19:21,767
Well, once I got to know you, I realized
you could never reciprocate my feelings...
1276
01:19:21,868 --> 01:19:25,270
unless I helped you connect
to your own inner goodness.
1277
01:19:25,371 --> 01:19:26,704
What does it say?
1278
01:19:27,373 --> 01:19:30,040
You don't even speak Italian, do you?
1279
01:19:30,843 --> 01:19:33,710
I mean, I...
I can order dinner, but...
1280
01:19:34,347 --> 01:19:35,947
My God, you're crazy!
1281
01:19:36,349 --> 01:19:37,549
No.
1282
01:19:38,351 --> 01:19:40,818
I'm just working a few things out.
1283
01:19:45,058 --> 01:19:48,991
Go ahead. I can't go any closer,
or the door will lock.
1284
01:19:55,001 --> 01:19:56,201
Who are you?
1285
01:19:57,604 --> 01:20:00,004
Just a med school dropout with...
1286
01:20:00,607 --> 01:20:02,274
you know, some issues.
1287
01:20:02,742 --> 01:20:03,942
Is that true?
1288
01:20:04,744 --> 01:20:07,279
Can you just say one thing that's true?
1289
01:20:07,380 --> 01:20:08,580
Okay.
1290
01:20:13,253 --> 01:20:14,453
I did...
1291
01:20:15,255 --> 01:20:16,722
20 perfect years...
1292
01:20:17,257 --> 01:20:20,159
in the most difficult schools
in the country.
1293
01:20:20,260 --> 01:20:22,927
Then in my last week of med school...
1294
01:20:23,263 --> 01:20:24,796
I got a "B"...minus.
1295
01:20:27,967 --> 01:20:32,504
I guess when they found me
I'd been in the shower for three days.
1296
01:20:32,605 --> 01:20:34,538
My parents were mortified.
1297
01:20:36,242 --> 01:20:38,043
The next thing I remember...
1298
01:20:38,144 --> 01:20:39,477
is your mother...
1299
01:20:40,213 --> 01:20:42,514
sitting in my room telling me stories...
1300
01:20:42,615 --> 01:20:43,815
about this...
1301
01:20:44,617 --> 01:20:46,350
brilliant, loyal boy...
1302
01:20:47,487 --> 01:20:50,554
who stuck by her
through thick and thin...
1303
01:20:51,257 --> 01:20:54,657
despite the many, many ways
she had failed him.
1304
01:20:56,929 --> 01:20:58,396
And then one day...
1305
01:20:58,931 --> 01:21:00,131
there you were.
1306
01:21:01,968 --> 01:21:03,901
And I introduced myself...
1307
01:21:05,371 --> 01:21:06,571
sort of.
1308
01:21:10,409 --> 01:21:11,709
I lied to you.
1309
01:21:13,680 --> 01:21:14,880
A lot.
1310
01:21:16,149 --> 01:21:18,682
But I never lied about my feelings.
1311
01:21:21,054 --> 01:21:22,721
I gotta... I gotta go.
1312
01:21:31,331 --> 01:21:34,998
Dr. Blue, please report to
Room 328, stat. Dr. Blue
1313
01:21:35,335 --> 01:21:36,535
Dr. Blue.
1314
01:21:44,811 --> 01:21:45,612
Victor Mancini?
1315
01:21:45,713 --> 01:21:48,365
You're under arrest
for suspicion of rape.
1316
01:21:48,466 --> 01:21:50,716
Rape? What are you...
I didn't ra... Oh, no. No.
1317
01:21:50,817 --> 01:21:53,181
She asked me to rape her.
It turns her on.
1318
01:21:53,283 --> 01:21:54,786
She even gave me the knife.
1319
01:21:54,887 --> 01:21:56,487
- At 90?
- Who's 90?
1320
01:21:56,889 --> 01:22:00,359
Eva Mueller, a resident of
St. Anthony's Constant Care Facility.
1321
01:22:00,460 --> 01:22:03,462
Her daughter said you held her down
and touched her woo-woo.
1322
01:22:03,563 --> 01:22:05,663
- Said it was your secret game.
- Oh, her. I
1323
01:22:05,764 --> 01:22:08,133
thought you were talking
about this other rape.
1324
01:22:08,234 --> 01:22:10,602
You realize we're the police, right?
1325
01:22:10,703 --> 01:22:14,078
I think we better go downtown
and straighten this out.
1326
01:22:14,180 --> 01:22:15,237
Yeah.
1327
01:22:16,409 --> 01:22:18,809
Hey. Good going, Charlie!
1328
01:22:20,713 --> 01:22:22,246
Check this shit out.
1329
01:22:22,749 --> 01:22:25,417
You gonna tell me you nailed
all these broads? You?
1330
01:22:25,518 --> 01:22:28,520
We're interested in talking with a
patient by the name of Paige Marshall...
1331
01:22:28,621 --> 01:22:30,822
in connection with
your mother's death.
1332
01:22:30,923 --> 01:22:32,557
Problem is, we can't find her.
1333
01:22:32,658 --> 01:22:35,327
Apparently she'd been operating
under the delusion she was a doctor.
1334
01:22:35,428 --> 01:22:37,028
Checked in catatonic.
1335
01:22:37,497 --> 01:22:40,565
Hadn't spoken for over a year until
one day your ma gave her a lab coat.
1336
01:22:40,666 --> 01:22:42,567
Staff let her wear it after that.
1337
01:22:43,868 --> 01:22:45,335
Nobody said a word.
1338
01:22:45,405 --> 01:22:48,573
Sounds like you made a few enemies
on the staff over there, lover boy.
1339
01:22:48,674 --> 01:22:52,141
And you can't find her?
In a mental hospital?
1340
01:22:53,045 --> 01:22:54,980
- Did you try her room?
- That's funny.
1341
01:22:55,081 --> 01:22:58,186
We can't find her because
she checked herself out,
1342
01:22:58,212 --> 01:22:59,976
you skeevy colonial dickwad.
1343
01:23:00,052 --> 01:23:01,326
Checked herself out?
1344
01:23:01,428 --> 01:23:04,623
Turns out she was voluntary.
Imagine that.
1345
01:23:04,724 --> 01:23:06,692
You wanna tell us about the diary?
1346
01:23:06,793 --> 01:23:08,794
It's my mom's. It's in Italian.
1347
01:23:08,895 --> 01:23:10,562
What the hell is this?
1348
01:23:10,863 --> 01:23:12,996
That was me when I was a kid.
1349
01:23:15,268 --> 01:23:17,669
A long time ago, in ancient Greece...
1350
01:23:17,770 --> 01:23:22,474
there was a young girl who fell in love
with a young boy from another country.
1351
01:23:22,575 --> 01:23:25,477
One day word came that the young boy
would have to go home.
1352
01:23:25,578 --> 01:23:27,540
So on their last night together
1353
01:23:27,566 --> 01:23:30,507
she traced the outline
of her lover's shadow...
1354
01:23:30,583 --> 01:23:33,485
so that she could always remember
how he looked...
1355
01:23:33,586 --> 01:23:37,519
on the very last moments
they were ever to be together.
1356
01:23:42,861 --> 01:23:44,061
Oh! No!
1357
01:23:44,397 --> 01:23:46,398
Come here! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
1358
01:23:46,499 --> 01:23:47,699
No!
1359
01:23:53,973 --> 01:23:55,173
No! No! No! No!
1360
01:23:56,809 --> 01:23:59,076
Victor! No! No! Victor! Victor!
1361
01:24:00,880 --> 01:24:02,347
Eat something, kid.
1362
01:24:02,982 --> 01:24:04,382
You look like ass.
1363
01:24:29,709 --> 01:24:32,709
He talks about that in here.
He's faking.
1364
01:24:37,883 --> 01:24:39,483
Looks pretty real.
1365
01:24:43,522 --> 01:24:44,722
Shit.
1366
01:24:51,461 --> 01:24:52,661
Oh, man!
1367
01:24:53,632 --> 01:24:57,432
You did not just shit
all over my interrogation room.
1368
01:25:01,040 --> 01:25:04,442
Sometimes you have to lose everything
before the penny finally drops.
1369
01:25:04,943 --> 01:25:06,143
You lose this?
1370
01:25:08,314 --> 01:25:09,514
Or whatever.
1371
01:25:11,684 --> 01:25:13,817
So here's what I figured out.
1372
01:25:14,687 --> 01:25:18,354
We're not evil sinners
or perfect knockoffs of God.
1373
01:25:19,125 --> 01:25:22,894
We let the world tell us
whether we're saints or sex addicts...
1374
01:25:22,995 --> 01:25:25,037
sane or insane,
1375
01:25:25,063 --> 01:25:27,920
heroes or victims...
1376
01:25:28,167 --> 01:25:30,808
whether we're good mothers
1377
01:25:30,834 --> 01:25:32,559
or loving sons.
1378
01:25:35,241 --> 01:25:37,574
But we can decide for ourselves.
1379
01:25:39,579 --> 01:25:42,080
As a certain wise fugitive
once told me...
1380
01:25:42,181 --> 01:25:46,751
sometimes it's not important
which way you jump, just that you jump.
1381
01:25:46,852 --> 01:25:51,022
I wish I could say I'd left the circuit
completely behind me...
1382
01:25:51,123 --> 01:25:53,656
but that wouldn't be entirely true.
1383
01:25:58,064 --> 01:26:00,064
I still wonder about Paige-
1384
01:26:00,933 --> 01:26:04,000
another beautiful psycho
like my mother...
1385
01:26:05,071 --> 01:26:08,340
or a twisted soul mate
sent to bring me back to life?
1386
01:26:14,914 --> 01:26:17,281
Only one way to find out.
107706
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