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1
00:00:05,130 --> 00:00:06,924
-Hey. Group: Hey.
2
00:00:07,174 --> 00:00:08,175
So how was Joan?
3
00:00:08,342 --> 00:00:09,343
Broke up with her.
4
00:00:09,843 --> 00:00:10,886
Group oh, why?
5
00:00:11,136 --> 00:00:13,889
Don't tell me.
Because of the big nostril thing?
6
00:00:15,015 --> 00:00:16,808
They were huge.
7
00:00:17,684 --> 00:00:20,062
When she sneezed,
bats flew out of them.
8
00:00:21,021 --> 00:00:22,856
Come on, they were not that huge.
9
00:00:23,106 --> 00:00:26,360
I'm telling you, she leaned back,
I could see her brain.
10
00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,072
How many women will you reject...
11
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:32,574
Over the most superficial,
insignificant things?
12
00:00:32,824 --> 00:00:35,494
Hold it. Hold it. I gotta side
with Chandler on this one.
13
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:38,330
When I first moved to the city,
I went out with this girl.
14
00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:40,958
Really hot. Great kisser...
15
00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:44,336
But she had the biggest
Adam's apple.
16
00:00:45,462 --> 00:00:46,588
Drove me nuts.
17
00:00:48,173 --> 00:00:50,801
- You or me?
- I got it.
18
00:00:51,009 --> 00:00:53,595
Joey, women don't have Adam's apples.
19
00:01:00,519 --> 00:01:03,522
Heh, heh.
You guys are messing with me, right?
20
00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,276
Grour yeah. We are.
21
00:01:08,402 --> 00:01:12,072
That's a good one.
For a second there, I was like, whoa!
22
00:01:59,995 --> 00:02:05,250
So you name one woman that you broke up
with for an actual real reason.
23
00:02:06,335 --> 00:02:07,419
Maureen rasillo.
24
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:10,339
Because she doesn't hate yanni
is not a real reason.
25
00:02:10,505 --> 00:02:12,549
[Knocking on door]
26
00:02:15,802 --> 00:02:17,387
Hello, Mr. Heckles.
27
00:02:18,513 --> 00:02:19,598
You're doing it again.
28
00:02:20,182 --> 00:02:21,308
We're not doing anything.
29
00:02:21,558 --> 00:02:24,436
You're stomping.
It's disturbing my birds.
30
00:02:26,313 --> 00:02:28,857
You don't have birds.
31
00:02:29,441 --> 00:02:31,318
I could have birds.
32
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:34,196
Okay, we'll try to keep it down.
33
00:02:34,446 --> 00:02:35,739
Thank you.
34
00:02:35,947 --> 00:02:38,450
I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
35
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:41,161
Rachel: All right, bye-bye.
36
00:02:42,704 --> 00:02:43,705
Chandler: Okay, Janice.
37
00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:46,833
You gotta give me Janice.
That wasn't about being picky.
38
00:02:47,042 --> 00:02:48,210
Ross: We'll give you Janice.
39
00:02:48,460 --> 00:02:50,337
I miss Janice, though.
40
00:02:50,629 --> 00:02:52,673
[Mimics Janice]
Hello, Chandler bing!
41
00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:54,675
[Monica laughs]
42
00:02:54,925 --> 00:02:58,595
[Mimics Janice] Oh, my god!
43
00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:00,430
Joey [mimics Janice]:
Oh, Chandler!
44
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:02,724
Now! Now!
45
00:03:05,143 --> 00:03:06,186
That's it.
46
00:03:07,104 --> 00:03:08,730
There! Faster!
47
00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:09,940
[Laughs]
48
00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:16,196
[Thumping from below]
49
00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:20,367
Ugh. Stop with the broom!
We're not making noise!
50
00:03:20,951 --> 00:03:22,077
[Thumping from below]
51
00:03:25,163 --> 00:03:26,665
[Thumping from below]
52
00:03:30,419 --> 00:03:31,586
Rachel: We won.
53
00:03:31,795 --> 00:03:33,880
- We won! Whoo!
- Whoo!
54
00:03:34,089 --> 00:03:36,049
[All groan]
55
00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:44,808
- How did this happen?
- He was sweeping.
56
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,269
They found a broom in his hand.
57
00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,397
Group: Oh. Rachel: Oh, dear god.
58
00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:52,065
- That's terrible.
- I know.
59
00:03:52,524 --> 00:03:54,484
I was sweeping yesterday.
60
00:03:54,735 --> 00:03:57,237
- It could've been me.
- Rachel: Yeah.
61
00:03:58,113 --> 00:04:00,198
- Joey: Sure.
- Sweeping. You never know.
62
00:04:00,407 --> 00:04:01,575
Never know.
63
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:10,000
Okay, it's very faint, but I can
still sense him in the building.
64
00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:13,545
Go into the light, Mr. Heckles!
65
00:04:16,965 --> 00:04:18,341
Chandler: Okay, Phoebe.
66
00:04:19,134 --> 00:04:21,303
I'm sorry,
but sometimes they need help.
67
00:04:23,013 --> 00:04:24,598
- Joey: Yeah.
- Here we go.
68
00:04:24,848 --> 00:04:27,309
That's fine, go ahead and scoff.
69
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:30,020
There are a lot of things
I don't believe in...
70
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:32,355
But that doesn't mean
they're not true.
71
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:38,653
Like crop circles or
the Bermuda triangle or evolution.
72
00:04:38,862 --> 00:04:40,614
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
73
00:04:40,906 --> 00:04:42,407
[Chuckles]
74
00:04:42,574 --> 00:04:44,826
What, you don't believe in evolution?
75
00:04:45,076 --> 00:04:46,286
No. Not really.
76
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:50,457
You don't believe in evolution?
77
00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:53,084
I don't know.
It's just, you know...
78
00:04:53,335 --> 00:04:58,089
Monkeys, dannin, it's a nice story.
I just think it's a little too easy.
79
00:05:01,510 --> 00:05:04,304
"Too easy"? Too...
80
00:05:04,513 --> 00:05:07,933
The process of every living thing
on this planet evolving...
81
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:12,437
Over millions of years from
single-celled organisms is "too easy"?
82
00:05:13,271 --> 00:05:15,273
Yeah, I just don't buy it.
83
00:05:16,191 --> 00:05:20,403
Excuse me. Evolution is not
for you to buy, Phoebe.
84
00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:24,449
Evolution is scientific fact,
like the air we breathe...
85
00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:26,243
Like gravity.
86
00:05:26,451 --> 00:05:28,745
Okay, don't get me started on gravity.
87
00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:35,752
You, uh... you don't believe in gravity?
88
00:05:37,128 --> 00:05:41,174
Well, it's not so much that,
you know, I don't believe in it.
89
00:05:41,424 --> 00:05:43,301
Lately I get the feeling that...
90
00:05:43,510 --> 00:05:46,721
I'm not so much being pulled down
as I am being pushed.
91
00:05:49,099 --> 00:05:50,141
[Knock on door]
92
00:05:50,392 --> 00:05:52,727
Uh-oh. It's Isaac Newton
and he's pissed.
93
00:05:55,939 --> 00:05:59,109
There she is. And over there,
that's the other one.
94
00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:01,611
This is Mr. Buddy boyle,
heckles' attorney.
95
00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:02,863
He'd like to talk to you.
96
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:04,489
What can we do for you?
97
00:06:04,739 --> 00:06:06,783
All right, kids, here's the deal.
98
00:06:07,033 --> 00:06:09,077
According my client's will...
99
00:06:09,286 --> 00:06:13,790
He wants to leave
all his earthly possessions...
100
00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:17,836
To "the noisy girls
in the apartment above mine."
101
00:06:19,296 --> 00:06:20,505
What about his family?
102
00:06:20,755 --> 00:06:23,174
-He didn't have any. Joey: Whoa.
103
00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:26,386
Okay, so let's talk money.
104
00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:29,556
All right, there was none.
105
00:06:29,806 --> 00:06:31,433
Now, let's talk signing.
106
00:06:31,683 --> 00:06:34,853
You be noisy girl number one.
You be noisy girl number two.
107
00:06:36,479 --> 00:06:39,566
I can't believe that this whole time
we thought he hated us.
108
00:06:39,816 --> 00:06:43,320
Isn't it amazing how much
you can touch someone's life...
109
00:06:43,570 --> 00:06:45,530
Without even knowing it?
110
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:47,240
Would you look at this dump?
111
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:49,784
He hated us!
This was his final revenge!
112
00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:52,287
Ever seen so much crap!
113
00:06:52,537 --> 00:06:56,124
Actually, I think this apartment
sullies the good name of crap.
114
00:06:57,125 --> 00:06:58,710
Check this out.
115
00:07:00,712 --> 00:07:02,255
Can I have this?
116
00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:06,426
How can you not believe in evolution?
117
00:07:07,427 --> 00:07:10,388
I don't know, just don't.
Look at this funky shirt!
118
00:07:11,181 --> 00:07:14,059
Pheebs, I've studied evolution
my entire adult life.
119
00:07:14,309 --> 00:07:17,646
And I can tell you, we've collected fossils
from all over the world...
120
00:07:17,938 --> 00:07:21,358
That actually show the evolution
of different species.
121
00:07:21,608 --> 00:07:24,361
I mean, you can literally see them...
122
00:07:24,569 --> 00:07:28,114
Evolving through time.
123
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:31,284
Really? You can actually see it?
124
00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:36,122
You bet! In the us,
China, Africa, all over!
125
00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:38,750
See, I didn't know that.
126
00:07:39,334 --> 00:07:41,461
Well, there you go.
127
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,088
Phoebe: Huh.
128
00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:48,176
So now the real question is,
who put those fossils there and why?
129
00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:55,642
Hey. Look at this.
My big book of grievances.
130
00:07:58,311 --> 00:07:59,813
Hey, there's me.
131
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:03,358
"April 17th, excessive noise...
132
00:08:03,608 --> 00:08:07,028
Italian guy comes home with a date."
Yeah.
133
00:08:07,195 --> 00:08:08,613
Chandler, you're in here too.
134
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:11,533
"April 18th, excessive noise...
135
00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:15,453
Italian guy's gay roommate
brings home dry cleaning."
136
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:24,212
Well, that's excellent.
137
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:26,881
Monica, look at this lamp.
138
00:08:27,090 --> 00:08:29,467
Is this tacky or what?
We have to have this.
139
00:08:30,677 --> 00:08:32,887
I think we have enough regular lamps.
140
00:08:33,138 --> 00:08:35,265
What? Come on, it's not like...
141
00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:38,184
I'm asking for this
girlie clock or anything.
142
00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:41,312
Which, by the way,
I also think is really cool.
143
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:44,566
Look, it doesn't go
with any of my stuff.
144
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:47,485
Well, what about my stuff?
145
00:08:48,445 --> 00:08:49,779
You don't have any stuff.
146
00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:53,867
You still think of it
as your apartment, don't you?
147
00:08:54,034 --> 00:08:55,618
Mmm... no.
148
00:08:55,869 --> 00:08:56,953
Yes, you do.
149
00:08:57,203 --> 00:09:00,498
You think of it as your apartment
and I just rent a room.
150
00:09:03,418 --> 00:09:07,464
Okay, while you "mmm" on that,
I'll go find a place for my new lamp.
151
00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:14,387
Okay, pheebs. See how I'm making
these little toys move?
152
00:09:17,557 --> 00:09:18,600
Opposable thumbs!
153
00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:25,106
Without evolution, how do you
explain opposable thumbs?
154
00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:29,944
Maybe the overlords needed them
to steer their spacecrafts.
155
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:32,363
Tell me you're joking.
156
00:09:32,906 --> 00:09:36,826
Look, can't we just say that you believe
in something and I don't?
157
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:39,788
- No. No, pheebs, we can't.
- Why not?
158
00:09:40,038 --> 00:09:43,416
What is this obsessive need you have
to make everybody agree with you?
159
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:46,711
No, what's that all about?
You know what I think?
160
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:52,217
I think maybe it's time
you put Ross under the microscope.
161
00:09:56,554 --> 00:09:58,640
Is there blood coming out of my ears?
162
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:03,895
Check it out.
Heckles' high-school yearbook.
163
00:10:05,396 --> 00:10:06,731
Wow. He looks so normal.
164
00:10:06,981 --> 00:10:08,983
He's even kind of cute.
165
00:10:09,192 --> 00:10:11,486
"Heckles, you crack me up
in science class.
166
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,738
You're the funniest kid in school."
167
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:16,282
- Funniest? Heckles?
- That's what it says.
168
00:10:17,534 --> 00:10:20,787
Wow. Heckles was voted class clown,
and so was I.
169
00:10:21,037 --> 00:10:22,455
[Thumping from above]
170
00:10:22,705 --> 00:10:24,958
He was right.
Would you listen to that?
171
00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:27,460
I'd call that excessive.
172
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,254
- Whoa.
- What?
173
00:10:29,504 --> 00:10:32,423
Heckles played clarinet in band,
and I played clarinet.
174
00:10:33,091 --> 00:10:36,219
And he was in the scale
modeler's club and I was...
175
00:10:36,427 --> 00:10:39,556
Well, there was no club,
but I sure thought they were cool.
176
00:10:39,931 --> 00:10:42,267
So? You were both dorks.
177
00:10:42,684 --> 00:10:43,726
Big deal.
178
00:10:44,227 --> 00:10:46,312
I just think it's weird, you know?
Heckles and me...
179
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:47,897
[Thumping from above]
180
00:10:48,064 --> 00:10:49,482
Heckles and me. Me...
181
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:51,025
Me and heckles.
182
00:10:51,526 --> 00:10:53,736
Hey, would you knock it off!
183
00:10:57,949 --> 00:10:59,117
Ah!
184
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:13,423
Have you been here all night?
185
00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:18,011
Pictures of all the women
heckles went out with.
186
00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:21,931
Look what he wrote on them.
"Vivian, too tall."
187
00:11:22,182 --> 00:11:23,808
"Madge, big gums."
188
00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:26,060
"Too loud."
189
00:11:26,311 --> 00:11:28,396
"Too smart."
"Makes noise when she eats."
190
00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:30,273
This is me.
191
00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:36,487
I'm gonna end up alone,
just like he did.
192
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:38,364
Chandler, heckles was a nut case.
193
00:11:38,615 --> 00:11:40,533
Our trains are on the same track.
194
00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:44,287
I'm coming up 30 years behind him,
but the stops are all the same.
195
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,122
Bitter town...
196
00:11:46,539 --> 00:11:49,083
Alone-ville, hermit junction!
197
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:53,046
You know what we gotta do?
Get you out of here.
198
00:11:53,296 --> 00:11:54,964
Come on, I'll buy you breakfast.
199
00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:58,051
What if I never find somebody?
Or worse, what if I found her...
200
00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:02,180
But I dumped her because
she pronounces it "supposably"?
201
00:12:02,889 --> 00:12:05,850
Chandler, come on,
you're gonna find somebody.
202
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,061
How do you know that? How?
203
00:12:08,269 --> 00:12:10,939
I don't know. I'm just
trying to help you out.
204
00:12:12,023 --> 00:12:13,900
You guys will all get married...
205
00:12:14,150 --> 00:12:15,526
And I'll end up alone.
206
00:12:16,361 --> 00:12:18,029
Will you promise me something?
207
00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:21,574
When you're married, will you
invite me over for holidays?
208
00:12:22,075 --> 00:12:23,701
I don't know what we'll be doing.
209
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:29,916
I mean, what if we're over
at her folks' place?
210
00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:34,295
Yeah, I understand.
211
00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:39,926
You can come over
and watch the super bowl.
212
00:12:40,134 --> 00:12:42,053
Every year, all right?
213
00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:46,599
You know what?
I'm not gonna end up like this.
214
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:48,685
I'll see you, man.
215
00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,232
Jeez.
216
00:12:58,361 --> 00:12:59,737
"Supposably."
217
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:03,908
Supposably.
218
00:13:06,494 --> 00:13:08,788
Did they go to the zoo?
219
00:13:08,997 --> 00:13:11,207
Supposably.
220
00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:21,217
[Line ringing]
221
00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:26,097
Hi. It's me.
222
00:13:26,556 --> 00:13:30,601
Oh, my god!
223
00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:34,147
Janice? You called Janice?
224
00:13:35,857 --> 00:13:36,983
Yes. Janice.
225
00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:39,152
Why is that difficult to comprehend?
226
00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:41,612
You remember Janice, right?
227
00:13:42,780 --> 00:13:47,327
Yes. She was smart, she was pretty
and she honestly cared about me.
228
00:13:47,577 --> 00:13:50,246
Janice is my last chance
to have somebody.
229
00:13:56,461 --> 00:13:59,380
Oh, my god!
230
00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,176
Jeez, look how fat she got.
231
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:08,890
- Hey, it's everybody.
- Group: Hi, Janice.
232
00:14:09,140 --> 00:14:10,308
Janice, you're...
233
00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:12,560
Yes, I am.
234
00:14:13,311 --> 00:14:15,188
- Is it...?
- Is it yours? Ha!
235
00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:17,440
You wish, Chandler bing.
236
00:14:18,191 --> 00:14:22,111
You are looking at a married lady now.
237
00:14:22,403 --> 00:14:23,488
Grour oh.
238
00:14:23,654 --> 00:14:25,114
Phoebe: Yeah.
239
00:14:26,741 --> 00:14:28,576
Congratulations.
240
00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:31,120
Aw, sweetie, I'm sorry.
241
00:14:31,371 --> 00:14:33,247
You couldn't tell me on the phone?
242
00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:36,459
And what? Miss the expression
on your face? Oh, no.
243
00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,420
Janice likes to have her fun.
244
00:14:39,629 --> 00:14:41,422
[Laughing]
245
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:53,851
You know what we haven't
played in a while?
246
00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:56,521
- What?
- Hide the lamp.
247
00:14:58,481 --> 00:15:00,233
Monica, let it go.
248
00:15:01,609 --> 00:15:03,403
Did you know
I'm allergic to shellfish?
249
00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:06,739
Then you'll just have
to eat the other lamps.
250
00:15:09,867 --> 00:15:12,495
Uh-oh. It's scary scientist man.
251
00:15:15,164 --> 00:15:16,874
Okay, Phoebe, this is it.
252
00:15:17,125 --> 00:15:20,837
In this briefcase I carry
actual scientific facts.
253
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:23,798
A briefcase of facts, if you will.
254
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:31,013
Some of these fossils are
over 200 million years old.
255
00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:34,475
Okay, look, before you even start,
I'm not denying evolution.
256
00:15:34,725 --> 00:15:36,769
It's just one of the possibilities.
257
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:38,980
It's the only possibility.
258
00:15:39,230 --> 00:15:44,110
Ross, could you just open
your mind, like, this much? Okay?
259
00:15:44,402 --> 00:15:48,573
Wasn't there a time when the brightest minds
in the world believe the earth was flat?
260
00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:54,078
And up till 50 years ago, you all thought
the atom was the smallest thing...
261
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:58,040
Until you split it open
and this whole mess of crap came out.
262
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:04,547
Now, are you telling me that you are
so unbelievably arrogant...
263
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:08,593
That you can't admit that
there's a teeny, tiny possibility...
264
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,845
That you could be wrong about this?
265
00:16:17,643 --> 00:16:19,520
There might be...
266
00:16:20,855 --> 00:16:22,648
A teeny...
267
00:16:24,108 --> 00:16:25,193
Tiny...
268
00:16:26,861 --> 00:16:28,488
Possibility.
269
00:16:30,239 --> 00:16:32,450
I can't believe you caved.
270
00:16:34,076 --> 00:16:35,119
What?
271
00:16:35,369 --> 00:16:38,706
You just abandoned
your whole belief system!
272
00:16:40,041 --> 00:16:43,336
Before, I didn't agree with you,
but at least I respected you.
273
00:16:45,463 --> 00:16:47,715
How are you gonna go
into work tomorrow?
274
00:16:47,924 --> 00:16:50,676
How are you going to face
the other science guys?
275
00:16:50,885 --> 00:16:53,721
How are you going to face yourself?
Oh...
276
00:17:10,279 --> 00:17:12,323
That was fun. So who's hungry?
277
00:17:12,573 --> 00:17:13,658
Monica: I am.
278
00:17:13,824 --> 00:17:15,826
Rachel: Me too.
Let me just get my coat.
279
00:17:18,788 --> 00:17:20,081
[Lamp shatters]
280
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:25,586
What happened?
281
00:17:25,753 --> 00:17:28,673
Okay.
All right, it was an accident, I swear.
282
00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:32,843
I was putting on my jacket and
the thing and the lamp and it broke.
283
00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:36,472
Oh, please, Monica!
You've always hated my lamp!
284
00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:40,935
And now all of a sudden,
it's just magically, it's just broken?
285
00:17:41,185 --> 00:17:42,395
Phoebe, tell her?
286
00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:45,940
I didn't see it, because
I was putting on my jacket.
287
00:17:46,148 --> 00:17:47,483
But I want to believe you.
288
00:17:51,946 --> 00:17:55,866
Hey, Chandler. Monica just
broke my seashell lamp.
289
00:17:57,785 --> 00:17:59,620
I'm gonna die alone!
290
00:18:02,123 --> 00:18:04,166
Okay, you win.
291
00:18:05,042 --> 00:18:07,336
Chandler, you are not
gonna die alone.
292
00:18:07,962 --> 00:18:09,839
Janice was my safety net, okay?
293
00:18:10,089 --> 00:18:11,716
And now I have to get a snake.
294
00:18:13,467 --> 00:18:14,885
Uh—huh. Why is that?
295
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:18,514
If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man,
I'm gonna need a thing.
296
00:18:18,764 --> 00:18:20,349
You know, a hook.
297
00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:23,603
Like that guy on the subway
who eats his own face.
298
00:18:24,312 --> 00:18:26,355
So I figure I'll be
"crazy man with a snake."
299
00:18:26,606 --> 00:18:27,857
Crazy snake man.
300
00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:30,109
Then I'll get more snakes,
call them my babies.
301
00:18:30,359 --> 00:18:32,486
Kids won't walk past my place,
they will run!
302
00:18:32,737 --> 00:18:35,906
"Run away from crazy snake man,"
they'll shout!
303
00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:41,954
You've got to get over this. Okay?
304
00:18:42,371 --> 00:18:43,789
You won't end up alone.
305
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:45,583
Of course I am.
306
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:49,545
I reject anyone who's crazy enough
to actually go out with me...
307
00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:53,424
And then I bitch that there
aren't any great women out there.
308
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,428
Chandler, you have just described...
309
00:18:57,637 --> 00:19:01,265
Virtually every man
that we've ever gone out with.
310
00:19:03,184 --> 00:19:05,394
You are not a freak.
You're a guy.
311
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,230
Rachel: She's right.
312
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,149
You're no different than the rest.
313
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:12,610
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Yes, he is.
314
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,612
You are totally different.
315
00:19:14,862 --> 00:19:15,863
In a bad way?
316
00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,865
No, honey, in a wonderful way.
317
00:19:18,115 --> 00:19:19,825
You know what you want now.
318
00:19:20,076 --> 00:19:21,619
Most guys don't even have a clue.
319
00:19:21,869 --> 00:19:25,665
You're ready to take risks, be
vulnerable and intimate with someone.
320
00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:27,458
You're not gonna end up alone.
321
00:19:28,709 --> 00:19:33,839
You called Janice. That's how much
you wanted to be with someone!
322
00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:37,468
- You've made it.
- You're there.
323
00:19:37,718 --> 00:19:40,137
You are ready to make a commitment!
324
00:19:40,388 --> 00:19:42,640
Whoa! Don't know about that.
325
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:51,065
Wow. What you got there?
326
00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:54,485
Something else that's not yours
that you can break?
327
00:19:57,405 --> 00:20:00,366
I know you like this
and I want you to have it.
328
00:20:00,574 --> 00:20:02,576
It'll look good in our apartment.
329
00:20:03,786 --> 00:20:05,579
Thank you.
330
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:08,958
[Clock whistles]
331
00:20:11,711 --> 00:20:13,337
That's fine.
332
00:20:14,588 --> 00:20:15,589
-Hey. Group: Hey.
333
00:20:15,798 --> 00:20:19,593
You'll all be pleased to know
that I have a date tomorrow night.
334
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:21,971
This woman Allison from work.
She is great.
335
00:20:22,221 --> 00:20:25,391
She's pretty, she's smart.
And I've been...
336
00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:28,936
Holding off asking her out
in the past, because she has a...
337
00:20:30,020 --> 00:20:31,522
Unusually large head.
338
00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:35,401
But I'm not going to let
that stuff hang me up anymore.
339
00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:36,652
All right.
340
00:20:36,819 --> 00:20:38,237
Look at me. I'm growing.
341
00:20:40,030 --> 00:20:42,700
Hey, you can't recycle yearbooks,
can you?
342
00:20:43,534 --> 00:20:44,702
I'll take that.
343
00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:46,078
You want his yearbook?
344
00:20:46,287 --> 00:20:50,666
Yeah. Yeah. Some people said nice things
about him. Somebody should have it.
345
00:20:50,916 --> 00:20:53,335
Gosh, this is so weird.
346
00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:56,881
His whole life was in
this apartment and now it's gone.
347
00:20:58,174 --> 00:21:02,511
I think it would be nice if we just
took a few moments for Mr. Heckles.
348
00:21:03,637 --> 00:21:07,475
I mean, he was kind of a pain.
He was, but he was a person.
349
00:21:07,683 --> 00:21:09,143
[All laughing]
350
00:21:09,310 --> 00:21:11,103
Monica: What?
351
00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:15,941
You're all going to hell.
352
00:21:16,192 --> 00:21:18,360
Rachel:
It's really not that big.
353
00:21:21,530 --> 00:21:23,783
- Taking that with you, huh?
- Oh, yeah.
354
00:21:29,872 --> 00:21:31,582
Hey, you coming?
355
00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:33,292
Yeah, in a second.
356
00:21:49,517 --> 00:21:51,519
Goodbye, Mr. Heckles.
357
00:21:54,814 --> 00:21:56,941
We'll try to keep it down.
358
00:22:07,952 --> 00:22:09,495
Allison: My major was useless.
359
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:13,833
How often do you look in the classifieds
and see "philosopher wanted"?
360
00:22:14,041 --> 00:22:15,501
Heh, heh. Sure.
361
00:22:15,709 --> 00:22:18,003
Chandler:
My god, that's a big head!
362
00:22:19,880 --> 00:22:23,717
It didn't look this big in the office.
Maybe it's the lighting.
363
00:22:23,926 --> 00:22:27,179
My head must look
like a golf ball at work.
364
00:22:28,222 --> 00:22:32,017
Don't get hung up on it. Quick, quick.
List five things you like about her.
365
00:22:32,268 --> 00:22:34,228
Nice smile, good dresser.
366
00:22:34,436 --> 00:22:36,981
Big head, big head, big head!
367
00:22:44,405 --> 00:22:46,407
[English - us - sdh]
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