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1
00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:27,280
-Mr President!
-Hello.
2
00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:29,480
-One question!
-I have no time, ask as we go.
3
00:00:29,560 --> 00:00:31,920
Besides roads, what else
will money be used for?
4
00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:34,760
I don't know.
We have little money and many problems.
5
00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:35,640
So, we'll see.
6
00:00:36,120 --> 00:00:37,920
Will the state pay more attention
7
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:39,760
to homeless animals?
8
00:00:39,840 --> 00:00:42,160
I promise,
after we help homeless people,
9
00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:43,440
we'll help the animals.
10
00:00:43,520 --> 00:00:45,280
And the agricultural industry?
11
00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:47,160
Perhaps. No time, sorry.
12
00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:48,840
Why so few press conferences?
13
00:00:48,920 --> 00:00:50,680
Yanukovich gave more interviews.
14
00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:52,040
The comparison is...
15
00:00:52,120 --> 00:00:55,040
Thanks. It's pedestrian.
I promise to speak more.
16
00:00:55,120 --> 00:00:57,720
It's just because of time, or lack of it.
17
00:00:57,800 --> 00:00:59,280
I promise, I'll find a window.
18
00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:01,520
I will speak
to all members of the mass media,
19
00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:03,520
and the public, and answer questions.
20
00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:04,760
-Last question.
-Yes.
21
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:06,600
Where is your strange car from?
22
00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:07,840
Ask Tolya, not me.
23
00:01:08,240 --> 00:01:10,960
-Anatoliy, is this your car?
-Could you tell us...
24
00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:13,600
-Why do you need this car?
-What's in the big trunk?
25
00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:17,640
-Why is it red and not black?
-Is it a fire fighter's automobile?
26
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:21,360
PRESIDENTIAL ADMINISTRATION OF UKRAINE
27
00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:40,560
Well, Sergei Pavlovich.
28
00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:42,720
We reviewed it all.
29
00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:44,080
To repair Kiev's roads,
30
00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:46,080
you will have one year and one billion.
31
00:02:46,640 --> 00:02:47,520
Are you kidding?
32
00:02:47,600 --> 00:02:48,960
Do I look like a comedian?
33
00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:50,400
Yes.
34
00:02:51,160 --> 00:02:51,960
That is, no.
35
00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:53,440
I wanted to say...
36
00:02:53,520 --> 00:02:54,320
Did I mishear?
37
00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:56,320
-You said one billion?
-Exactly.
38
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,600
-Not two, but one?
-Exactly, one.
39
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:00,880
Why?
40
00:03:00,960 --> 00:03:01,760
Shall I explain?
41
00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:03,000
With pleasure.
42
00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:04,680
Here, pay attention.
43
00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:05,560
This...
44
00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:08,520
This is the famous French Millau Viaduct.
45
00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:11,160
A beautiful bridge
on a global scale. You like?
46
00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:12,960
-Yes.
-Yes?
47
00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:15,320
A building and engineering masterpiece.
48
00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:16,200
Here...
49
00:03:17,080 --> 00:03:18,560
is a more familiar image.
50
00:03:19,880 --> 00:03:20,680
Exquisite.
51
00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:22,360
The Darnytsia Bridge.
52
00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:25,560
It took twice as long
to build as the French one.
53
00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:27,200
Hence it cost twice as much.
54
00:03:27,760 --> 00:03:28,800
Do you catch my drift?
55
00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:30,640
Sure.
56
00:03:30,720 --> 00:03:31,600
That is, no. I...
57
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:33,000
How can we repair
58
00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:35,040
the roads for one billion?
59
00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:36,560
Quickly and properly.
60
00:03:37,240 --> 00:03:38,360
Any more questions?
61
00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:39,320
Yes.
62
00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:41,040
How can we for 500 million--
63
00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:44,160
Quickly, properly and reliably.
What don't you understand?
64
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:46,440
It's not clear!
How can I for 100 million--
65
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:49,920
Quickly, properly, reliably
and without a word!
66
00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:51,160
I don't plan to be quiet.
67
00:03:51,240 --> 00:03:53,640
How on earth can I, for 10 million--
68
00:03:53,720 --> 00:03:55,880
If you don't like something, go to...
69
00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:57,560
the president!
70
00:03:57,640 --> 00:04:00,000
I'll go to the president, Nikolaevich,
71
00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:02,160
and you, as usual, can f***k off.
72
00:04:02,240 --> 00:04:04,960
That broken record again! What can I do?
73
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:06,160
They gave the order.
74
00:04:07,120 --> 00:04:08,920
No money or salaries.
75
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:10,480
But, kindly do the roads.
76
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:12,200
F***k you and not the roads!
77
00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:14,440
That's it, I call a strike!
78
00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:15,840
F***k all this s**t!
79
00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,519
Good morning, Sergei Viktorovich.
80
00:04:21,959 --> 00:04:24,080
-Morning. What is it this time?
-Meaning?
81
00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:26,320
Every "morning, Sergei Viktorovich"
82
00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:28,480
carries confusion, panic and shock.
83
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,240
So, what is it this time?
84
00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:31,600
A roundtable with Arabs,
85
00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:34,160
a Korean delegation,
or dinner with Italians?
86
00:04:35,040 --> 00:04:35,840
After you.
87
00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:39,640
Worse. You have
a vocational proficiency test.
88
00:04:39,720 --> 00:04:40,840
We have an invitation.
89
00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:42,800
A meeting with the cultural attaché
90
00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:44,120
of the Indian embassy.
91
00:04:45,080 --> 00:04:45,960
Nothing to it.
92
00:04:46,040 --> 00:04:48,320
A classic black suit,
tactful conversation
93
00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:49,560
and no jokes, right?
94
00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:51,120
How can I put this?
95
00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:53,520
Not quite.
96
00:04:54,480 --> 00:04:55,560
Jeez!
97
00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:59,640
Indian culture is unique and versatile.
98
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,080
You need to prepare very well
99
00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:04,440
in order to impress
the Indian attaché.
100
00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:06,000
Does the attaché have a name?
101
00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:07,920
-Minakshi Shukkhavat.
-What?
102
00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:10,880
Minakshi Shukkhavat.
Simpler is Miss Shukkhavat.
103
00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:13,520
I wouldn't say
that is simpler, but...
104
00:05:14,560 --> 00:05:16,600
Hold up, why Miss? Is she a woman?
105
00:05:16,680 --> 00:05:18,000
She's not just a woman.
106
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:21,480
Her uncle is the Indian billionaire
Mukhammad Shukkhavat.
107
00:05:21,560 --> 00:05:24,920
Charm her and Ukraine gets
a lucrative machine building contract.
108
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:27,200
-How lucrative?
-Twenty billion.
109
00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:28,960
I'm listening carefully.
110
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:32,640
Boris Petrovich, I appreciate
you taking the time to see me!
111
00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:34,000
I know how... No, thanks.
112
00:05:34,080 --> 00:05:35,320
...busy you are.
113
00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:38,000
So, let's skip
the pomp and formalities
114
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:39,560
and get right to the point.
115
00:05:40,400 --> 00:05:42,360
It was nice chatting with you.
116
00:05:42,440 --> 00:05:43,960
Sorry you're leaving.
117
00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:44,840
Goodbye.
118
00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:47,320
-Goodbye.
-Goodbye.
119
00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:48,680
-Goodbye.
-Goodbye.
120
00:05:51,080 --> 00:05:52,240
What are you doing here?
121
00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:54,280
Oh, Vasya! Hi!
122
00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:55,800
How are things? How are you?
123
00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:57,520
Don't avoid my question.
124
00:05:57,600 --> 00:05:59,280
-I'm not avoiding.
-So?
125
00:05:59,360 --> 00:06:00,200
See, I just came.
126
00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:01,560
For a cup of coffee.
127
00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:03,800
-Do you want it?
-No, you drink it.
128
00:06:03,880 --> 00:06:05,200
-Okay.
-What is this?
129
00:06:05,280 --> 00:06:06,400
That's not mine.
130
00:06:06,480 --> 00:06:08,080
He must have forgotten...
131
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:10,520
-What is it?
-Vasya.
132
00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:13,000
It's personal.
It has nothing to do with you.
133
00:06:13,480 --> 00:06:14,320
Sveta, lately,
134
00:06:14,400 --> 00:06:16,760
I seem to have
a lot to do with your stuff
135
00:06:16,840 --> 00:06:18,960
that later
may bite our nation in the ass.
136
00:06:20,320 --> 00:06:22,320
Okay. I decided to start a business.
137
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:23,880
-What?
-Business?
138
00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:24,760
-Yes.
-You?
139
00:06:24,840 --> 00:06:26,200
Am I not allowed?
140
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:29,320
I needed to, perhaps,
hand over something to someone...
141
00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:31,440
Don't fool around. What business?
142
00:06:31,520 --> 00:06:33,840
Relax, it's nothing illegal. I will...
143
00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:36,320
sew.
144
00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:38,560
You?
145
00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:40,160
The only time I saw
146
00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:41,520
a needle in your hand,
147
00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:43,040
you were on a drip.
148
00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:46,000
-I won't be sewing!
-No?
149
00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:47,400
-Of course not.
-Who will?
150
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:50,280
-For starters, maybe two or three...
-Seamstresses?
151
00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:51,800
Factories.
152
00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:53,920
Sveta, a factory?
153
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:55,800
-Garment factory.
-I know, Sveta.
154
00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,560
Do you know this is a major enterprise?
155
00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:00,960
Staffing, wages, taxes. Tons of problems.
156
00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:02,720
Where is the start-up capital?
157
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:04,680
No problem, it's firmly legal.
158
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:05,960
I'm getting a bank loan.
159
00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:07,440
I've spoken to Olya.
160
00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:09,840
It's dead in the water there, she said.
161
00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:11,600
I have to go to a different bank.
162
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:15,160
Sveta, even if a bank
gives you a loan...
163
00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:16,840
You realize why?
164
00:07:17,640 --> 00:07:18,920
Because you're my sister.
165
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,240
Namaste is a traditional Indian greeting.
166
00:07:21,320 --> 00:07:22,920
Hands are level with the chest
167
00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:24,440
and a light bow of the head.
168
00:07:24,920 --> 00:07:27,600
Don't bow so deeply
like you're reaching for the floor.
169
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:29,520
Palms together level with the chest
170
00:07:29,600 --> 00:07:30,760
and light bow...
171
00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:33,440
If you bow like that,
you show a lack of respect.
172
00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:35,080
Palms together at...
173
00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,000
No pre-school clapping.
174
00:07:37,080 --> 00:07:38,840
Palms level with the chest
175
00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:40,360
and light bow of the head.
176
00:07:40,440 --> 00:07:42,920
And a light, sincere smile...
177
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,760
Don't smile like that.
178
00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:47,000
Work on the namaste at home.
179
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,120
Following the greeting,
180
00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:52,080
they will place a flower garland
on you as a welcoming sign.
181
00:07:52,160 --> 00:07:53,400
What's with the head?
182
00:07:53,480 --> 00:07:54,360
Namaste is first.
183
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,040
The scent is quite unanticipated.
184
00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:02,320
Just don't show it.
185
00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:05,040
For 20 billion, I'm ready to suffer.
186
00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:06,120
Most importantly,
187
00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:09,120
for no reason should you touch
Miss Shukkhavat,
188
00:08:09,200 --> 00:08:10,760
nor the rest of the delegation.
189
00:08:10,840 --> 00:08:11,800
Historically,
190
00:08:11,880 --> 00:08:13,320
Indian society is divided
191
00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,360
into numerous castes.
192
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,320
So, if you shake
the hand of one caste member
193
00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:21,520
after shaking the hand
of a different caste member,
194
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:22,960
you might insult both.
195
00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:24,600
Understood. No touching.
196
00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:25,920
Very good.
197
00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:27,880
Now, let's go over the tea party.
198
00:08:30,120 --> 00:08:31,600
What if I'm off to a good start?
199
00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:34,320
I have a business plan
and many orders already.
200
00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:35,360
-Orders?
-Yes.
201
00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:36,240
What kind?
202
00:08:36,320 --> 00:08:37,200
We're sewing.
203
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:39,400
-Sewing what?
-Uniforms.
204
00:08:39,480 --> 00:08:40,520
-Uniforms?
-Yes.
205
00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:41,760
-For whom?
-Everyone.
206
00:08:42,240 --> 00:08:43,360
-The army!
-The army?
207
00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:45,680
For the police. For railwaymen.
208
00:08:45,760 --> 00:08:47,560
-Who else? Firemen.
-Firemen?
209
00:08:47,640 --> 00:08:48,680
-Athleisure.
-For?
210
00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:50,040
For athletes!
211
00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:51,880
Stop fooling around.
212
00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:54,800
You do know that to make uniforms
213
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:57,960
for state bodies,
you have to win a tender?
214
00:08:58,520 --> 00:09:00,480
Who said that you'll win a tender?
215
00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:02,160
I will.
216
00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:03,320
I'm your sister.
217
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:04,520
That's what I thought.
218
00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:05,840
Again these family ties.
219
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,080
I warned you, no cronyism whatsoever.
220
00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:09,440
-None.
-So it begins...
221
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:11,400
-I'm not starting anything.
-Vasya!
222
00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:13,360
I just got the wheels to start turning.
223
00:09:13,800 --> 00:09:15,080
-Turning?
-My business!
224
00:09:15,160 --> 00:09:17,080
-Turning?
-You have to wreck...
225
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:19,080
Look, I won't get in your way.
226
00:09:19,160 --> 00:09:21,520
-You've killed my business side.
-I have not.
227
00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:22,680
Listen to me, please!
228
00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:23,720
I am warning you.
229
00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:25,520
If I find that even one person
230
00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:28,160
from this office
does business with you,
231
00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:29,200
I'll fire them!
232
00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:39,520
Sveta...
233
00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:41,000
Why did the people leave?
234
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:42,360
Maybe it's closing.
235
00:09:42,440 --> 00:09:44,720
Will you pay for the coffee?
236
00:09:49,760 --> 00:09:52,080
So, Sergei Viktorovich, remember.
237
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:55,840
What are the features
of the Indian tea-drinking ritual?
238
00:09:55,920 --> 00:09:58,720
Don't take or give anything
with the left hand.
239
00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:00,440
It's considered to be unclean.
240
00:10:00,920 --> 00:10:01,920
What if I'm a leftie?
241
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:04,440
-There's 20 billion riding on this.
-Fine...
242
00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:06,760
Always use the right hand.
243
00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:08,960
Second: masala tea.
244
00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,720
It is an acquired taste.
245
00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:14,040
You'd better not drink it,
just look like you've sipped it.
246
00:10:14,120 --> 00:10:14,920
Oksana...
247
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:17,360
have you been
to the Actor's House cafe?
248
00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:18,320
I've never had to.
249
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:20,000
Well, I drank stuff there
250
00:10:20,080 --> 00:10:22,360
that makes this masala tea
a walk in the park.
251
00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,440
I still advise you to fake sip the tea.
252
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,600
What do you want to show us?
253
00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:36,640
-What is this?
-The president visits a strip club.
254
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:37,720
He arrives,
255
00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:38,600
so what?
256
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,800
This isn't an ordinary strip club.
257
00:10:40,880 --> 00:10:42,480
It has a wide range of services.
258
00:10:42,560 --> 00:10:44,600
It all depends on the client's desires
259
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:46,360
and how deep their wallet is.
260
00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,640
Well, let's view your live broadcast.
261
00:11:08,120 --> 00:11:10,920
So I see a bachelor entering.
262
00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:13,440
He looks at a broad dancing, and...?
263
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:17,280
And the broad isn't anything special.
264
00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:32,120
What is this nonsense?
265
00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:34,000
Nowadays, wives order strippers
266
00:11:34,080 --> 00:11:36,160
for their husbands' birthdays.
267
00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:45,160
Hi, Marina.
268
00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:46,880
Vasyl Petrovych!
269
00:11:49,760 --> 00:11:51,240
Why did you come again?
270
00:11:52,000 --> 00:11:53,400
You know very well
271
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,080
why I came again.
272
00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,000
I don't want to.
273
00:11:57,080 --> 00:11:59,120
But I want to.
274
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:01,040
-You can't see, I don't need it!
-Okay.
275
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:02,400
I'm not interested!
276
00:12:02,480 --> 00:12:03,360
You're not alone.
277
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:05,000
-Interesting.
-I don't want to.
278
00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:06,000
I want to!
279
00:12:06,480 --> 00:12:07,960
Lord, find someone else!
280
00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:09,800
-I won't!-A younger and dumber one.
281
00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:11,840
I don't want a younger and dumber one!
282
00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:13,800
-Not for me.
-Right, Vasyl Petrovych.
283
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:15,040
Who would have thought?
284
00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:17,120
Look, why is he sitting?
285
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,160
I don't want to look for another.
286
00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,640
I don't need this, understand?
287
00:12:24,720 --> 00:12:27,080
You don't understand
how much you need this.
288
00:12:27,160 --> 00:12:28,920
-I don't want to.-Earlier you did.
289
00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:30,440
In eighth class.
290
00:12:30,520 --> 00:12:33,240
Do you rememberhow you wanted to? Did I force you?
291
00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:34,560
Did I run after you?
292
00:12:34,640 --> 00:12:35,880
Did I ask you?
293
00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:38,120
You willingly decided on your own
294
00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:39,360
and stayed after class.
295
00:12:39,920 --> 00:12:41,080
Marina, honey...
296
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:42,280
-Are you normal?-I am.
297
00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:44,240
Come on, consent.
298
00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:45,280
No, Marina.
299
00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:46,720
Do not consent.
300
00:12:46,800 --> 00:12:49,680
Don't. They give more for rape.
301
00:12:49,760 --> 00:12:52,720
If she is underage, you'll get a bonus.
302
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:53,920
Vasya will get...
303
00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:55,840
between 10 and 15 years.
304
00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:58,040
All the pupils left, but you stood out.
305
00:12:58,600 --> 00:12:59,960
Everyone left, not you.
306
00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:02,680
You begged me. I couldn't tear you away.
307
00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:04,760
You wanted so much
308
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:06,320
to study.
309
00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:09,200
Why did you quit history?For what? For all this?
310
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,920
You could get an honors degree.
311
00:13:11,000 --> 00:13:12,320
What would I do with it?
312
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:14,000
History class?
313
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:15,960
I don't get it.
314
00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:18,040
What is this?
315
00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:19,120
I think, we need...
316
00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:20,160
Sorry, gentleman.
317
00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:21,640
Who knew...
318
00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:23,520
You realize,
319
00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:26,720
Krivitsky, there won't be a bonus.
320
00:13:27,680 --> 00:13:28,720
I am Savitsky.
321
00:13:29,160 --> 00:13:31,640
You are stupid, Savitsky.
322
00:13:31,720 --> 00:13:32,640
Go and work.
323
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:35,600
Or you'll end up like Krivitsky.
324
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:40,200
We need solid dirt.
325
00:14:10,520 --> 00:14:12,320
STOP
326
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:25,560
What the hell is this?
327
00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:26,680
What is this called?
328
00:14:26,760 --> 00:14:29,240
Asphalt doesn't like to rush.
329
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:32,000
We're working on it.
Estimates, bids, etc.
330
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:34,320
Look, Mister Etc.
What are you saying?
331
00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,600
-When will work begin?
-The work has started.
332
00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:37,960
Preparatory work.
333
00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:39,560
We bought new machinery,
334
00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:42,120
a clinker, bitumen and Portland cement.
335
00:14:42,200 --> 00:14:44,680
Yes, he did buy many things.
336
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:46,000
A new Vaybach.
337
00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:47,400
Maybach.
338
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,280
A new Royal Martin yacht.
339
00:14:49,840 --> 00:14:50,680
Royal Marine.
340
00:14:50,760 --> 00:14:52,320
And a new Harley Davidson.
341
00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:54,080
I am sure that you,
342
00:14:54,160 --> 00:14:56,920
as the new infrastructure minister,
343
00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,400
won't repeat the mistakes
of your predecessor.
344
00:14:59,480 --> 00:15:01,640
Of course not. Don't worry.
345
00:15:01,720 --> 00:15:03,400
I'll take them into account.
346
00:15:04,520 --> 00:15:05,600
How much?
347
00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:08,000
"How much"?
348
00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:08,880
Well...
349
00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:10,680
Your share.
350
00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:14,120
I think that you,
351
00:15:14,200 --> 00:15:16,520
as the new infrastructure minister,
352
00:15:17,320 --> 00:15:18,440
won't let me down.
353
00:15:18,520 --> 00:15:21,320
Vasyl Petrovych, I'll do all that I can.
354
00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:23,000
In summary, the new minister
355
00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:24,680
bought a London penthouse,
356
00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:26,840
a sizable villa in Spain...
357
00:15:28,040 --> 00:15:30,160
and a small castile in Scotland.
358
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:31,120
Castle.
359
00:15:31,200 --> 00:15:32,360
How did I say it?
360
00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:36,320
You said it in the way
that I have to explain to journalists.
361
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:38,440
-Explain what?
-Your words!
362
00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:40,200
Go back to work.
363
00:15:40,280 --> 00:15:41,200
On my way.
364
00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:44,440
I hope that you,
as the new infrastructure minister,
365
00:15:45,200 --> 00:15:46,560
will take seriously
366
00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:48,720
the responsibilities entrusted to you.
367
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:50,480
Certainly, Vasyl Petrovych.
368
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:51,960
I can't wait to start.
369
00:15:52,040 --> 00:15:53,320
He started well.
370
00:15:53,400 --> 00:15:54,720
A posh suburban house,
371
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:56,200
a flat in downtown Kiev,
372
00:15:56,800 --> 00:15:58,520
a Maserati GranTurismo
373
00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:00,000
and a Monterey speed boat.
374
00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:01,640
Did I say everything correctly?
375
00:16:01,720 --> 00:16:03,000
This time, yes.
376
00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:06,320
Katya, I no longer hope,
377
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:08,960
I simply pray to God that you,
378
00:16:09,040 --> 00:16:11,480
as the new infrastructure minister--
379
00:16:11,560 --> 00:16:14,160
-Vasyl Petrovych, I'll f--
-Katya, don't.
380
00:16:14,840 --> 00:16:15,800
Mr President.
381
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:18,360
Don't worry. You know me.
382
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:21,400
I won't let you down.
I'll pave the roads for you!
383
00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,680
Better than in America!
384
00:16:22,760 --> 00:16:23,920
In America?
385
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:26,280
Yes, and a house in Hawaii.
386
00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:27,680
A flat in London.
387
00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:28,880
Two Mercedes.
388
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:30,840
Five bars of gold.
389
00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,360
Ten Hermes purses.
390
00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:36,760
An exclusive Fendi jumpsuit
391
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:38,200
that is worth $10,000.
392
00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,920
Katya broke all the records for greed.
393
00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:42,640
Why does she need it all?
394
00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,920
It's not hers, it's her daughter's.
395
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,600
Katya has a separate list.
396
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:50,400
Lord...
397
00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:51,960
There won't be roads.
398
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:26,000
Namaste.
399
00:17:27,079 --> 00:17:28,119
Namaste.
400
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:35,400
Accept the flowers
401
00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:37,040
as a symbol of deep respect.
402
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:48,000
You have nice dancing in India.
403
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:49,840
Beautiful moves.
404
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:52,360
In Ukraine, we also have similar dancing.
405
00:17:57,120 --> 00:17:58,600
-Please have a seat.
-Yes.
406
00:18:02,560 --> 00:18:03,360
Thank you.
407
00:18:15,120 --> 00:18:16,000
Right hand.
408
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:21,480
-Well--
-The hosts speak first.
409
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:31,680
I hope that
during the course of today's meeting,
410
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:35,120
Ukraine and India
will reach a new level of relations.
411
00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:36,840
Here's to you!
412
00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:55,440
Namaste.
413
00:18:59,680 --> 00:19:00,760
Firstly, hello.
414
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:03,000
Please, young man.
415
00:19:04,040 --> 00:19:06,320
My name is Nikolai Griniuk
of Kiev Otradniy.
416
00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:07,200
Nice to meet you.
417
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:08,240
I want to ask
418
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:10,680
about the razing of dilapidated buildings.
419
00:19:10,760 --> 00:19:12,200
Raze the Otradniy district?
420
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:14,280
Not exactly.
421
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,560
How will resettlement be solved...
422
00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:18,760
So?
423
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:20,640
To national love!
424
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:22,120
...in homes needing repair?
425
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:23,920
We'll provide
426
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:24,920
new housing.
427
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,640
A new promise, Vasyl Petrovych!
428
00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:27,840
And the roads?
429
00:19:27,920 --> 00:19:30,440
Your sarcasm, Yana, is appreciated.
430
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:32,160
As you know,
431
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:34,200
this is a 25 year problem.
432
00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:35,240
I'm not the first,
433
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:38,080
to try to address the roads with his team.
434
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:41,360
This problem was
those who managed this process.
435
00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:43,960
Are you trying to avoid responsibility?
436
00:19:44,040 --> 00:19:46,160
I'm not avoiding responsibility.
437
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:47,720
I'm giving an explanation.
438
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:49,920
Why don't you show us and not tell us?
439
00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:51,520
The government always tells,
440
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:52,880
but has no roads to show.
441
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:55,640
It's as if you get
an injection after the election.
442
00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:57,960
Any decent Ukrainian, once elected,
443
00:19:58,040 --> 00:19:59,600
becomes a shrewd, weasel-like,
444
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:01,280
thievish... yokel.
445
00:20:03,160 --> 00:20:03,960
You think
446
00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:06,600
he became a shrewd,
weasel-like, thievish yokel?
447
00:20:06,680 --> 00:20:08,400
Or was he a yokel to begin with?
448
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,040
Are people born yokels?
449
00:20:10,120 --> 00:20:12,360
I don't think
Ukrainians are born yokels.
450
00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:15,040
I think we are all born Ukrainians.
451
00:20:15,120 --> 00:20:17,600
So, once we are born,it means we deserved it.
452
00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:20,120
We, our parents,or ancestors. No difference.
453
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:23,080
This person
was also born a Ukrainian.
454
00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:24,160
A small, plump,
455
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:27,160
pink-cheeked Ukrainian
at 3.5 kilograms.
456
00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:28,560
The question is,
457
00:20:29,120 --> 00:20:31,520
how do these three kilograms
458
00:20:32,080 --> 00:20:35,560
turn into a 100 kilogram yokel?
459
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:37,800
How does this happen?
460
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,040
I'll explain.
461
00:20:39,120 --> 00:20:39,960
We are to blame.
462
00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:41,640
People like you, Yana, like me.
463
00:20:41,720 --> 00:20:43,120
All of us. We are to blame.
464
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:44,720
It starts at birth.
465
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:46,680
With a bribe at the maternity ward.
466
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:48,200
It's a must.
467
00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:50,360
Pay the doctor. No bribe, go back inside.
468
00:20:50,440 --> 00:20:52,440
Then we bring the baby home,
469
00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:54,360
where it's still a Ukrainian.
470
00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:56,560
Once it starts to think,
it becomes a yokel.
471
00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:58,080
He first sees his dad.
472
00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:01,200
Dad is sitting watching TV,of course, and says:
473
00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:04,160
"These assholesare to blame for everything,
474
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,840
these bastards,these damn politicians!"
475
00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:09,400
While saying this,
he counts the 200 hryvnias
476
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:11,600
he got at a rent-a-rally yesterday
477
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:15,320
protesting against these assholes
and putrid lawmakers.
478
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:17,800
If dad doesn't,someone will in his place.
479
00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:20,200
Why should someone else take
480
00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:21,480
the stolen money?
481
00:21:21,560 --> 00:21:23,280
"Why not me?", dad reasons.
482
00:21:23,360 --> 00:21:24,800
The baby takes mental note.
483
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:26,520
So, our Ukrainian gradually...
484
00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,680
becomes like his dad.
485
00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:30,960
He turns into a yokel. Gradually.
486
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:32,680
Not all is lost? Right?
487
00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:34,480
All is lost! There's an uncle.
488
00:21:34,560 --> 00:21:36,880
The uncle and aunt work at state agencies.
489
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:38,520
Where do they enroll the boy?
490
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:39,520
Where? In school!
491
00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:41,600
They enroll him in a fancy school. No.
492
00:21:41,680 --> 00:21:42,520
A ritzy,
493
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:44,800
a particularly ritzy school.
494
00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:46,720
So the boy graduates with honors.
495
00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:49,160
They all picnic on the Dnepr River.
496
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:51,280
His report card shows straight A's.
497
00:21:51,360 --> 00:21:53,800
Indeed. Why not? Shish kabobs and cognac.
498
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:55,760
And the rubbish? Yokels will clean up.
499
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:59,160
In this elated moodwe enroll in a university.
500
00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:01,040
Everyone pitches in to enroll him.
501
00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:02,640
Where do we go upon graduation?
502
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:04,640
To the river. Why so much trash?
503
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:06,600
Why is there garbage everywhere?
504
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:09,280
A sign reads: "Do not litter!"
505
00:22:09,360 --> 00:22:10,520
So who littered here?
506
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:13,800
Why won't these yokels
pick up after themselves?
507
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:16,280
In a good mood,
508
00:22:16,360 --> 00:22:20,040
in his new Honda,that was a graduation gift,
509
00:22:20,120 --> 00:22:23,000
our half-yokel,half-Ukrainian goes cruising
510
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:25,080
in the Kiev night,
511
00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:26,640
where there are no roads.
512
00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:28,840
He couldn't give a shit, pardon me,
513
00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:30,920
about the people sleeping at this time
514
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:31,800
after working.
515
00:22:31,880 --> 00:22:33,840
Or the mother who works two jobs
516
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:35,320
to feed her child,
517
00:22:35,400 --> 00:22:37,000
who she just rocked to sleep.
518
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:39,160
He whirls to the future! It isn't far.
519
00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:41,080
At 20 or 25, he becomes a lawmaker.
520
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,240
And our Ukrainian completely transforms
521
00:22:44,320 --> 00:22:47,080
into a full-fledged yokel.
522
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:49,200
He will be fine.
523
00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:50,240
However...
524
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:53,360
his children will study in Switzerland.
525
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:55,320
Not here, away from the yokels.
526
00:22:55,720 --> 00:22:57,400
He'll eschew the Dnepr River.
527
00:22:57,480 --> 00:22:58,600
He shat there already.
528
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:01,360
He'll go to the Maldives
to avoid the yokels.
529
00:23:02,080 --> 00:23:03,680
He'll buy a flat in London,
530
00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:05,040
to avoid the yokels.
531
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:06,920
Removed from all this.
532
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:08,640
This isn't mine.
533
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,120
Herein lies our enigmatic...
534
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:15,240
yokel soul.
535
00:23:18,480 --> 00:23:19,280
Are there...
536
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:21,440
any more questions...
537
00:23:22,640 --> 00:23:24,040
my fellow Ukrainians?
538
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:26,720
Translated by Mark P. Raczkiewycz
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