All language subtitles for Girl Stroke Boy 1971 BluRay.eng
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1
00:03:17,703 --> 00:03:21,082
Pamela, what are you
going to wear tonight?
2
00:03:22,250 --> 00:03:24,168
My black velvet.
3
00:03:24,293 --> 00:03:27,171
Black is lovely,
but I think velvet
4
00:03:27,255 --> 00:03:29,215
might be a little warm for winter.
5
00:03:29,298 --> 00:03:31,008
Warm? For this winter?
6
00:03:31,300 --> 00:03:33,553
No, the central
heating unit has gone mad.
7
00:03:33,678 --> 00:03:35,263
George hit it.
8
00:03:35,346 --> 00:03:37,431
It's like a heat wave here.
9
00:03:37,598 --> 00:03:39,934
I think you'd be
happier in cotton.
10
00:03:40,184 --> 00:03:42,353
PAMELA:
But what about my new kaftan?
11
00:03:42,436 --> 00:03:45,481
Oh, nothing new.
It's not that sort of dinner party.
12
00:03:45,982 --> 00:03:47,400
Well, what about...
13
00:03:47,483 --> 00:03:49,819
Wait a minute, darling.
14
00:03:50,486 --> 00:03:53,239
What about my
orange and lemon kaftan?
15
00:03:53,447 --> 00:03:57,034
Oh, not yellow and orange!
It's so torrid here.
16
00:03:57,952 --> 00:04:02,039
What about my kaftan
with the purple pattern?
17
00:04:02,331 --> 00:04:04,584
Pamela, you know perfectly well
18
00:04:04,667 --> 00:04:06,544
that it won't look good
against my chairs.
19
00:04:06,627 --> 00:04:08,629
You must look good,
for your godson.
20
00:04:09,213 --> 00:04:12,216
Well, what about my kaftan
with the green motif?
21
00:04:12,675 --> 00:04:15,678
Splendid. Laurie loves green.
22
00:04:16,095 --> 00:04:18,764
You must be awfully excited, darling.
23
00:04:18,848 --> 00:04:21,267
He's only bringing
the girl home for the weekend.
24
00:04:21,350 --> 00:04:23,510
Yes, well, it's the first time
it's happened, isn't it?
25
00:04:23,561 --> 00:04:26,272
And she sounds such
an exotic girlfriend.
26
00:04:26,814 --> 00:04:30,943
Pamela, you know that on the
colour question, I am a pioneer.
27
00:04:31,152 --> 00:04:34,739
I'm making the heroine of
my next book an octoroon.
28
00:04:34,822 --> 00:04:36,866
I've had this marvellous idea.
29
00:04:37,033 --> 00:04:38,618
Her mother is dead,
30
00:04:38,701 --> 00:04:42,371
and her poor, black father
marries again, most unfortunately.
31
00:04:42,455 --> 00:04:45,583
He doesn't only bring
home a stepmother,
32
00:04:45,666 --> 00:04:49,629
he brings home two
hideously ugly stepsisters, too.
33
00:04:50,379 --> 00:04:53,299
Doesn't it, er...
sound rather familiar, darling?
34
00:04:53,382 --> 00:04:54,717
Well, all the best stories are.
35
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:57,595
The writer simply has to bring
an adult attitude toward them.
36
00:04:57,678 --> 00:04:59,472
That's what counts.
37
00:05:00,973 --> 00:05:03,226
Which story does it
remind you of?
38
00:05:03,434 --> 00:05:04,769
Oh, never mind.
39
00:05:05,311 --> 00:05:07,271
Of course, Laurie will
appreciate the warmth
40
00:05:07,396 --> 00:05:09,732
after that awful clinic,
poor boy.
41
00:05:09,899 --> 00:05:11,734
Now, don't exaggerate.
42
00:05:11,901 --> 00:05:13,402
My son is perfectly well.
43
00:05:13,486 --> 00:05:15,279
He's never really been ill.
44
00:05:15,488 --> 00:05:17,448
He just likes to make a fuss.
45
00:05:17,531 --> 00:05:19,575
George! In here.
46
00:05:19,951 --> 00:05:22,828
Oh, what a relief,
Lettice, dear.
47
00:05:22,912 --> 00:05:26,832
I've been thinking about you
so much during the last few days.
48
00:05:27,375 --> 00:05:29,919
Do you think I ought to
get out Peter's bermudas?
49
00:05:30,002 --> 00:05:32,672
I think he might feel
a little self-conscious.
50
00:05:32,755 --> 00:05:35,258
Oh, and don't forget,
eight-thirty.
51
00:05:35,341 --> 00:05:37,176
Mmm.
52
00:05:37,802 --> 00:05:40,221
God damn the little bastards!
53
00:05:40,304 --> 00:05:43,349
God rot their
secondary modern guts.
54
00:05:44,016 --> 00:05:46,894
If there was any justice
in this world, he would.
55
00:05:47,561 --> 00:05:51,107
Nowadays, he daren't lift a finger
because of the education authority.
56
00:05:51,190 --> 00:05:54,235
George, I've
some wonderful news.
57
00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:56,779
Fire in the gym,
a sit-in in the bogs.
58
00:05:56,862 --> 00:05:58,822
It's absolutely infamous.
I wash my hands of them.
59
00:05:58,906 --> 00:06:00,908
Be careful.
The water's very hot.
60
00:06:03,327 --> 00:06:05,162
You're damn right.
61
00:06:07,248 --> 00:06:10,751
George, I've just written
the first words of my new book.
62
00:06:10,876 --> 00:06:14,797
I'm calling it
He Came, He Saw, She Conquered.
63
00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:17,091
And I'm having a coloured heroine.
64
00:06:17,174 --> 00:06:19,927
Lettice, what in heaven's name
have you done to this chair?
65
00:06:20,011 --> 00:06:22,388
Has it been connected
to the mains?
66
00:06:23,097 --> 00:06:25,057
The room is hot.
67
00:06:25,182 --> 00:06:27,601
And if you glower at me like that,
68
00:06:27,685 --> 00:06:30,563
I'll tell you why it's hot,
and whose fault it is.
69
00:06:30,688 --> 00:06:33,232
And the window
seems to have stuck.
70
00:06:33,316 --> 00:06:37,653
These damn new window locks.
"So burglar-proof," you said.
71
00:06:37,737 --> 00:06:39,488
And then you lost the key.
72
00:06:39,655 --> 00:06:43,451
Do what I do, and use
your imagination to stay fresh.
73
00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,620
What do you think of Mandy May?
74
00:06:46,704 --> 00:06:48,331
She the one in the Lower Fourth?
75
00:06:48,414 --> 00:06:53,919
No! She's the heroine of
He Came, He Saw, She Conquered.
76
00:06:54,003 --> 00:06:55,981
It will sell at thirty shillings
and, with a good press
77
00:06:56,005 --> 00:06:58,883
and a bit of luck, it'll do
three editions in the first year,
78
00:06:58,966 --> 00:07:03,179
and be a tremendous help
in understanding the colour problem,
79
00:07:03,262 --> 00:07:05,598
which I do think is so important.
80
00:07:05,681 --> 00:07:08,768
I can see it's spring again.
The artistic sap is rising, is it?
81
00:07:08,851 --> 00:07:11,062
I knew you'd be thrilled.
82
00:07:11,645 --> 00:07:13,856
Lettice, I want to talk to you.
83
00:07:13,939 --> 00:07:15,858
Sandwich lost his
faith this afternoon,
84
00:07:15,941 --> 00:07:18,694
halfway through the Synoptic Gospels
with the Lower Sixth.
85
00:07:18,778 --> 00:07:20,154
"Faith" or "face"?
86
00:07:20,237 --> 00:07:21,864
Faith.
87
00:07:21,947 --> 00:07:23,282
He can't teach anymore.
88
00:07:23,366 --> 00:07:26,494
He rent his gown from top to bottom,
and bit through the hem.
89
00:07:26,577 --> 00:07:29,663
He's a fine teacher too.
A fine teacher.
90
00:07:29,747 --> 00:07:32,666
Do you know what young Titmarsh
had the gall to say to him?
91
00:07:32,750 --> 00:07:35,169
"God who?" Titmarsh said.
Just that.
92
00:07:35,252 --> 00:07:37,963
"Do you believe in God, Titmarsh?"
93
00:07:38,047 --> 00:07:39,840
"God who?"
94
00:07:39,924 --> 00:07:41,258
Sandwich was finished.
95
00:07:41,342 --> 00:07:42,885
Did you dry these?
96
00:07:42,968 --> 00:07:45,304
A whole lifetime of religious
instruction obliterated.
97
00:07:45,388 --> 00:07:47,306
It will have to be done again.
98
00:07:47,515 --> 00:07:49,016
We're not having guests.
99
00:07:49,100 --> 00:07:50,393
Only a handful.
100
00:07:50,476 --> 00:07:53,521
Pamela and Peter Havendon,
and Liz, of course.
101
00:07:53,646 --> 00:07:57,900
Liz adores Laurie,
poor, sad virgin.
102
00:07:58,609 --> 00:07:59,735
Izzy?
103
00:07:59,819 --> 00:08:03,989
Liz, idiot. If she will do that
Mona Lisa smile all the time
104
00:08:04,073 --> 00:08:05,658
what can she expect?
105
00:08:05,741 --> 00:08:08,786
You want more from a woman
than a fixed grin.
106
00:08:08,869 --> 00:08:10,663
First time I've ever
heard you admit that.
107
00:08:14,750 --> 00:08:16,836
Why is that bird
stopped in mid-suck?
108
00:08:16,961 --> 00:08:18,421
God knows.
109
00:08:19,004 --> 00:08:21,006
"God who?"
110
00:08:21,507 --> 00:08:24,301
Can you see this bowl
if I put it here?
111
00:08:24,385 --> 00:08:25,761
No.
112
00:08:26,554 --> 00:08:27,930
But what the hell?
113
00:08:28,055 --> 00:08:30,516
Language.
114
00:08:30,641 --> 00:08:32,810
I wish I knew what
you were doing, Lettice.
115
00:08:32,935 --> 00:08:34,562
I've had a terrible day.
116
00:08:34,645 --> 00:08:37,189
The water will cool the air.
117
00:08:37,690 --> 00:08:40,776
I left this house this morning
a pleasant 60 degrees.
118
00:08:40,860 --> 00:08:42,528
You could see out of the windows,
119
00:08:42,611 --> 00:08:44,989
you could sit comfortably
in the chairs.
120
00:08:45,114 --> 00:08:47,825
When the windows would open,
the clocks worked.
121
00:08:47,908 --> 00:08:50,286
It all seems a long time ago.
122
00:08:50,619 --> 00:08:52,830
And now only the greenfly
seem happy.
123
00:08:52,913 --> 00:08:55,791
Well, why don't you turn down
the bloody central heating?
124
00:08:55,875 --> 00:08:58,878
I can't regulate the bloody
central heating anymore.
125
00:08:58,961 --> 00:09:01,881
You left the switch
hanging off the wall.
126
00:09:01,964 --> 00:09:03,841
I never touched the switch.
127
00:09:04,341 --> 00:09:06,093
Don't look at me
like that, dear.
128
00:09:06,177 --> 00:09:08,762
I've lived with your shortcomings
for over thirty years,
129
00:09:08,846 --> 00:09:10,806
and I'm not likely to
walk out on you now,
130
00:09:10,890 --> 00:09:13,392
although the idea does have
something to recommend it.
131
00:09:13,476 --> 00:09:14,602
You hit it.
132
00:09:14,685 --> 00:09:16,979
- You hit it.
- I merely tapped it.
133
00:09:17,062 --> 00:09:19,940
And then to smash the tap,
turning the oil off.
134
00:09:20,024 --> 00:09:21,609
Well, the instructions
clearly say
135
00:09:21,692 --> 00:09:23,819
that you can adjust
all adjustable parts.
136
00:09:23,903 --> 00:09:25,070
With a hammer?
137
00:09:25,154 --> 00:09:27,656
That must be in the small
print that I can't read.
138
00:09:27,740 --> 00:09:32,703
These are three inches taller already.
I find that awe-inspiring.
139
00:09:32,786 --> 00:09:35,289
Do you realise
it's only our climate
140
00:09:35,414 --> 00:09:37,791
that keeps the jungle at bay?
141
00:09:37,875 --> 00:09:41,420
I must be careful what I say
about the jungle this weekend.
142
00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:45,925
God, this
diabolical thing says 85 now!
143
00:09:46,050 --> 00:09:47,384
Have you called the engineers?
144
00:09:47,468 --> 00:09:50,179
Five times,
with increasing acrimony.
145
00:09:50,262 --> 00:09:51,990
- When are they coming to fix it?
- On Monday.
146
00:09:52,014 --> 00:09:54,058
A whole weekend?
We'll be cooked by then.
147
00:09:54,141 --> 00:09:56,185
Monday afternoon
at the earliest.
148
00:09:56,268 --> 00:09:57,978
They're beyond reason.
149
00:09:58,062 --> 00:09:59,897
They don't work at weekends.
150
00:09:59,980 --> 00:10:01,982
Like all emergency services,
151
00:10:02,066 --> 00:10:04,235
they exist to
create emergencies,
152
00:10:04,318 --> 00:10:06,111
not to relieve them.
153
00:10:06,195 --> 00:10:08,447
Are you determined
to have people in?
154
00:10:08,531 --> 00:10:10,241
I've told the women,
summer frocks.
155
00:10:10,324 --> 00:10:11,909
The men'll just have to suffer.
156
00:10:11,992 --> 00:10:13,786
Suffer?!
157
00:10:13,869 --> 00:10:16,038
- Relax, darling.
- Bah!
158
00:10:16,163 --> 00:10:19,625
You must learn to get
excited more calmly.
159
00:10:19,708 --> 00:10:22,836
George!
Jo will love it.
160
00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:26,507
And just think, Laurie
will be home soon.
161
00:10:26,590 --> 00:10:28,259
He's going to think it very odd,
162
00:10:28,342 --> 00:10:31,178
you filling the house with
boring people and exotic undergrowth
163
00:10:31,262 --> 00:10:33,389
the first weekend
he turns up with a girlfriend.
164
00:10:33,472 --> 00:10:34,723
A what?
165
00:10:34,807 --> 00:10:36,684
A girlfriend.
166
00:10:39,687 --> 00:10:42,147
A West Indian girlfriend.
167
00:10:43,899 --> 00:10:45,901
Of course, he can't be serious.
168
00:10:45,985 --> 00:10:49,029
But we can't afford to
be narrow minded, George.
169
00:10:49,113 --> 00:10:51,574
The message of my work is love.
170
00:10:51,657 --> 00:10:54,034
The message of my life is love.
171
00:10:54,118 --> 00:10:57,162
I can love the
beautiful black daughter
172
00:10:57,246 --> 00:11:00,124
of a, thank God,
West Indian High Commissioner
173
00:11:00,207 --> 00:11:02,793
just as well as
I can love a shop girl.
174
00:11:02,876 --> 00:11:04,128
More, probably,
175
00:11:04,211 --> 00:11:07,006
because the relationship
is less likely to be permanent.
176
00:11:07,089 --> 00:11:08,799
Thank you, darling.
177
00:11:10,050 --> 00:11:12,428
What's wrong with
calling her a girlfriend?
178
00:11:12,678 --> 00:11:15,347
I hope you haven't been
going round saying that
179
00:11:15,472 --> 00:11:17,433
Laurie has a fiancée.
180
00:11:17,516 --> 00:11:19,685
It's not as if it was
a storm warning.
181
00:11:19,810 --> 00:11:23,022
Laurie's having a
West Indian girl home.
182
00:11:23,105 --> 00:11:24,481
We shall welcome her,
183
00:11:24,565 --> 00:11:26,525
we shall take her in our stride.
184
00:11:26,609 --> 00:11:30,529
But we shall never forget that
he's only known her a few weeks.
185
00:11:30,613 --> 00:11:33,032
Laurie never does
anything impetuously.
186
00:11:33,157 --> 00:11:35,534
It takes him an hour to shave.
187
00:11:35,659 --> 00:11:37,137
At least he'll find
the water hot enough.
188
00:11:37,161 --> 00:11:40,706
I don't suppose they're
even on first-name terms yet.
189
00:11:41,081 --> 00:11:43,709
And there you go,
marrying them off.
190
00:11:43,792 --> 00:11:46,229
Well, let me call the Havendons
and tell them what's happened.
191
00:11:46,253 --> 00:11:48,505
After all, the boy's only
just come out of hospital.
192
00:11:48,631 --> 00:11:50,758
Laurie is perfectly well.
193
00:11:50,841 --> 00:11:52,968
Oh, come on, now.
He's bonkers.
194
00:11:53,260 --> 00:11:55,012
Six months ago, he
didn't even know me.
195
00:11:55,137 --> 00:11:58,682
Well, he just forgot a
few things, and people.
196
00:11:58,766 --> 00:12:00,517
He never forgot me, though,
197
00:12:00,601 --> 00:12:03,145
which I thought was
particularly courteous of him.
198
00:12:10,027 --> 00:12:12,112
If you despise
your closest friends,
199
00:12:12,196 --> 00:12:13,447
why invite them to dinner?
200
00:12:13,530 --> 00:12:16,367
I don't despise
my closest friends.
201
00:12:16,450 --> 00:12:18,744
I'm just indifferent to them.
202
00:12:28,879 --> 00:12:30,756
Well, I'm not opening
one of my best bottles.
203
00:12:30,881 --> 00:12:33,592
I already have. Two.
204
00:12:47,981 --> 00:12:51,235
Oh, God, can't we for one night
simply be ourselves?
205
00:12:51,318 --> 00:12:55,364
The whole point of being
middle class is that you can't.
206
00:13:06,625 --> 00:13:10,838
- George, you haven't shaved yet.
- Oh.
207
00:13:11,296 --> 00:13:14,383
It's a hundred in the shade.
208
00:13:15,551 --> 00:13:17,636
If you're made of asbestos,
I'm not.
209
00:13:27,354 --> 00:13:29,106
I've put out your best black.
210
00:13:29,189 --> 00:13:31,316
You look so distinguished in it.
211
00:13:34,820 --> 00:13:37,573
It feels like the
end of the world.
212
00:13:37,698 --> 00:13:39,366
All the more reason
to put on a suit.
213
00:13:39,491 --> 00:13:40,534
All right.
214
00:13:40,617 --> 00:13:43,036
Only if I die of a coronary,
it'll be your funeral.
215
00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:44,621
You'll have to wear black then,
216
00:13:44,705 --> 00:13:47,374
so now's a good time
to get used to it.
217
00:13:47,916 --> 00:13:51,920
Not my favourite day.
218
00:13:52,004 --> 00:13:54,923
Sandwich gives up the Holy Ghost.
219
00:13:55,007 --> 00:13:57,885
Oh, I forgot. The head girl
exposed herself to me again.
220
00:13:58,010 --> 00:14:00,429
If only it would
lead to pneumonia.
221
00:14:01,638 --> 00:14:03,432
Weren't you
just a little surprised
222
00:14:03,515 --> 00:14:05,726
when Laurie asked
if he could bring her home?
223
00:14:05,809 --> 00:14:07,895
They couldn't
send a man round,
224
00:14:07,978 --> 00:14:10,022
but they could sell me a fan.
225
00:14:12,065 --> 00:14:16,361
Aren't you just a little surprised
that Laurie had a girlfriend at all?
226
00:14:16,445 --> 00:14:18,489
It seemed perfectly natural to me,
227
00:14:18,572 --> 00:14:21,533
insofar as anything
does seem natural these days.
228
00:14:21,658 --> 00:14:23,744
He never seemed to me
to be very fond of girls.
229
00:14:23,869 --> 00:14:26,914
He never once
forgot Mother's Day.
230
00:14:26,997 --> 00:14:29,142
Do you know, I don't remember
him bringing a single girl home
231
00:14:29,166 --> 00:14:30,876
all the time I've known him.
232
00:14:30,959 --> 00:14:33,629
What an odd way to
talk about your own son.
233
00:14:33,712 --> 00:14:37,049
Girls were always ringing
him up to ask him to parties.
234
00:14:37,132 --> 00:14:37,925
There was...
235
00:14:38,008 --> 00:14:41,261
Oh, whatshername, with the
hairpins that kept on coming off.
236
00:14:41,345 --> 00:14:42,596
Alison someone.
237
00:14:42,679 --> 00:14:44,640
She would have given
her right breast for him.
238
00:14:44,723 --> 00:14:49,019
Not that he demands sacrifice
of women, or has a morbid nature.
239
00:14:49,186 --> 00:14:51,164
Not that she had a right breast,
from what I can remember.
240
00:14:51,188 --> 00:14:52,940
Yes, that's the one.
241
00:14:53,482 --> 00:14:55,818
Mallinson...
You know, woodwork and biology.
242
00:14:55,901 --> 00:14:58,195
Said that Laurie was
the only boy in the class
243
00:14:58,278 --> 00:15:00,113
who never giggled
during sex instruction.
244
00:15:00,197 --> 00:15:02,783
With Mallinson, I'd doubt
it was a laughing matter.
245
00:15:02,866 --> 00:15:05,702
Oh, it's...
It's just that I'm surprised.
246
00:15:05,786 --> 00:15:07,496
Oh, pleased.
247
00:15:07,955 --> 00:15:10,332
Yes, and rather relieved
248
00:15:10,415 --> 00:15:12,751
to think that Laurie's
got involved with a young girl.
249
00:15:12,876 --> 00:15:14,336
We don't know if she is young,
250
00:15:14,419 --> 00:15:16,630
and I can't quite see where
the relief comes in.
251
00:15:16,755 --> 00:15:18,674
Oh, come on now.
He was going to be a bachelor.
252
00:15:18,757 --> 00:15:20,133
A celibate.
253
00:15:20,342 --> 00:15:22,344
I think you'd better
put your shirt on
254
00:15:22,427 --> 00:15:24,930
before you take back
that vile insinuation.
255
00:15:25,055 --> 00:15:26,348
It's so hot!
256
00:15:26,431 --> 00:15:28,350
Thank God I don't understand
257
00:15:28,433 --> 00:15:30,853
a word of your
disgusting innuendos.
258
00:15:31,019 --> 00:15:33,730
Simply because he hasn't
whored his way to manhood
259
00:15:33,814 --> 00:15:35,858
like the rest of his
half-baked generation.
260
00:15:35,983 --> 00:15:37,192
Celibate!
261
00:15:37,276 --> 00:15:40,529
I daresay your talks to
the sixth form are equally lewd.
262
00:15:41,238 --> 00:15:42,781
Celibate.
263
00:15:42,906 --> 00:15:46,159
Don't you dare use that word
of our... of my child,
264
00:15:46,243 --> 00:15:48,954
in his... in our...
in my hearing ever again.
265
00:15:49,037 --> 00:15:50,455
Is that clear?
266
00:15:51,498 --> 00:15:53,166
Celibate?
267
00:15:53,709 --> 00:15:55,544
Oh, is that what you said?
268
00:15:55,627 --> 00:15:58,088
- Well, if you thought that...
- I did not.
269
00:15:59,715 --> 00:16:00,966
No, it can't be!
270
00:16:01,508 --> 00:16:03,927
Well, what time do you make it?
271
00:16:04,011 --> 00:16:06,388
This says five o'clock.
The damn thing stopped.
272
00:16:06,471 --> 00:16:07,764
It's six by this.
273
00:16:07,931 --> 00:16:09,433
They've both stopped.
274
00:16:09,516 --> 00:16:12,060
I'm not ready.
I have a hundred things to do.
275
00:16:12,811 --> 00:16:15,147
Now the handle's hot.
Oh, God.
276
00:16:15,230 --> 00:16:18,025
Look at me, absolutely ruined.
277
00:16:18,108 --> 00:16:19,484
Now the damn door's stuck.
278
00:16:19,610 --> 00:16:21,904
We're trapped, Lettice.
It won't open.
279
00:16:21,987 --> 00:16:24,948
If you're going to panic,
I'm not not going to be able to go.
280
00:16:25,032 --> 00:16:26,491
Ow!
281
00:16:29,620 --> 00:16:31,330
My God, it's them!
282
00:16:31,413 --> 00:16:34,041
Laurie, darling!
283
00:16:34,082 --> 00:16:36,376
I didn't expect you for ages yet.
284
00:16:36,501 --> 00:16:37,920
Mother.
285
00:16:38,045 --> 00:16:41,089
No, don't pull away.
I won't make a fuss.
286
00:16:41,214 --> 00:16:45,135
People really do do this sort
of thing after a long absence.
287
00:16:45,218 --> 00:16:46,803
Let me look at you.
288
00:16:46,929 --> 00:16:48,907
- Well, I can look.
- Glad to have you back.
289
00:16:48,931 --> 00:16:50,724
- How are you?
- Fine, fine.
290
00:16:50,849 --> 00:16:53,185
Older, but finer,
er... wiser.
291
00:16:53,268 --> 00:16:55,896
I've... I've lost weight, darling.
Don't you think I have?
292
00:16:55,979 --> 00:16:57,859
You look as beautiful as ever.
You never change.
293
00:16:57,898 --> 00:17:01,777
Outrageous, with just enough truth
not to make it flattery.
294
00:17:01,902 --> 00:17:04,404
George, why don't you tell him
how well he looks?
295
00:17:04,529 --> 00:17:06,990
Please, let's just get
one thing straight.
296
00:17:07,074 --> 00:17:09,159
A weekend of being told
I'm through the worst
297
00:17:09,242 --> 00:17:10,922
is, like, gonna put me
on my back for life.
298
00:17:10,994 --> 00:17:14,748
I'm perfectly all right,
so let's just leave it there.
299
00:17:15,540 --> 00:17:17,626
Why is it so bloody hot in here?
300
00:17:17,793 --> 00:17:19,920
Er... That's a long story.
301
00:17:20,087 --> 00:17:23,423
Your father, he hit
the central heating.
302
00:17:23,966 --> 00:17:25,425
Why don't you open a window?
303
00:17:25,676 --> 00:17:28,971
I have made the house burglar-proof,
with beautiful new locks,
304
00:17:29,054 --> 00:17:31,932
and your father's
lost the master key.
305
00:17:32,474 --> 00:17:35,143
Where's, um... Jo?
306
00:17:35,268 --> 00:17:36,812
Couldn't she come?
307
00:17:36,895 --> 00:17:39,773
I'd so looked forward
to meeting her.
308
00:17:43,944 --> 00:17:45,570
I tripped over
the central heating.
309
00:17:45,654 --> 00:17:47,030
I'm always falling
over something.
310
00:17:47,114 --> 00:17:48,865
I hope I haven't wrecked it.
311
00:17:51,618 --> 00:17:53,036
Oh, no.
312
00:17:53,161 --> 00:17:56,123
Jo, this is my mother.
313
00:17:56,248 --> 00:17:57,916
Oh, Mrs Mason,
this is so exciting.
314
00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,126
I'm so happy to meet you.
315
00:17:59,209 --> 00:18:01,628
Laurie's told me
so much about you.
316
00:18:01,712 --> 00:18:03,672
None of which she believes.
317
00:18:03,755 --> 00:18:05,215
May I?
318
00:18:05,340 --> 00:18:07,300
Heavens, you are warm.
319
00:18:07,592 --> 00:18:08,927
This is my father.
320
00:18:09,011 --> 00:18:10,345
Thank you for letting me come.
321
00:18:10,429 --> 00:18:13,098
It's wonderful to be able to get
out of London and meet people.
322
00:18:13,181 --> 00:18:15,434
The charm may wear off.
323
00:18:15,517 --> 00:18:18,687
Any friend of Laurie's is a...
324
00:18:18,729 --> 00:18:20,647
Surprise to me.
325
00:18:21,023 --> 00:18:22,566
May I?
326
00:18:22,649 --> 00:18:25,027
You wear the same
aftershave as Laurie.
327
00:18:25,152 --> 00:18:26,737
Oh, look, your book covers.
328
00:18:26,820 --> 00:18:30,490
I've read them all, Mrs Mason.
My favourite is...
329
00:18:30,615 --> 00:18:33,493
Mother really wanted
a romantic hero for a son.
330
00:18:33,618 --> 00:18:36,163
I must have been a
terrible disappointment.
331
00:18:39,082 --> 00:18:41,376
This is a lovely room, Mrs Mason.
332
00:18:41,460 --> 00:18:43,837
Did you heat it up
on purpose for me?
333
00:18:43,962 --> 00:18:45,690
Mother, how long
has it been like this?
334
00:18:45,714 --> 00:18:47,174
Only since this afternoon.
335
00:18:47,299 --> 00:18:48,925
When the Japanese did it,
336
00:18:49,009 --> 00:18:52,012
it was an infringement
of the Geneva Convention.
337
00:18:56,266 --> 00:18:58,518
You'll have me swinging
from the potted plant soon.
338
00:18:58,602 --> 00:19:00,562
Oh! Me Tarzan!
339
00:19:00,687 --> 00:19:03,106
No, Jo, you Jane.
Me, Tarzan.
340
00:19:03,190 --> 00:19:05,567
- Cologne, Mrs Mason?
- Thank you, no.
341
00:19:05,692 --> 00:19:08,195
Oh, well, I've sloshed
on enough for both of us.
342
00:19:08,278 --> 00:19:10,238
Dad broke the central heating.
343
00:19:10,322 --> 00:19:14,409
No, I merely tapped it,
and it fell to pieces in my hands.
344
00:19:14,534 --> 00:19:15,994
I'm with you, Mr Mason.
345
00:19:16,078 --> 00:19:18,872
I guess it's the mud hut
I grew up in.
346
00:19:19,081 --> 00:19:21,958
I just get in a
panic seeing a screw.
347
00:19:22,084 --> 00:19:24,628
You're just as I imagined,
Mrs Mason.
348
00:19:24,711 --> 00:19:26,880
I hope I'm not too
much of a shock.
349
00:19:27,172 --> 00:19:30,008
You never used to be
so short-sighted, Mother.
350
00:19:30,509 --> 00:19:31,802
What's wrong?
351
00:19:31,927 --> 00:19:36,389
Laurie, this is the beautiful
Miss Delaney you wrote about?
352
00:19:37,349 --> 00:19:40,143
The Miss Delaney you were
so anxious for us to meet?
353
00:19:40,227 --> 00:19:41,269
Yes.
354
00:19:41,353 --> 00:19:44,523
- The air hostess?
- Yes, Mother.
355
00:19:44,606 --> 00:19:48,110
- The High Commissioner's daughter?
- That's her.
356
00:19:49,027 --> 00:19:53,073
There are one or two things
that your father wishes to ask you.
357
00:19:53,156 --> 00:19:54,491
No. No.
358
00:19:54,658 --> 00:19:55,951
I'll get the luggage.
359
00:19:56,034 --> 00:19:58,662
No, wait, Miss Delaney.
There's no hurry.
360
00:20:00,956 --> 00:20:02,415
George.
361
00:20:02,499 --> 00:20:06,378
Jo, are you...
362
00:20:06,461 --> 00:20:09,506
Frightfully tired after the journey?
363
00:20:09,589 --> 00:20:10,966
Of course she isn't, George.
364
00:20:11,091 --> 00:20:13,635
Look at her. Closely.
365
00:20:13,718 --> 00:20:15,720
I see the table
is laid for seven.
366
00:20:15,804 --> 00:20:18,056
You've got people coming round.
How nice.
367
00:20:18,181 --> 00:20:20,517
Since I met Jo,
I have this incredible desire
368
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:23,311
to put her on show.
Who's coming?
369
00:20:23,562 --> 00:20:26,898
Ah, I think that's what your
mother wants me to explain.
370
00:20:27,065 --> 00:20:30,485
No-one is coming.
Not a soul.
371
00:20:30,569 --> 00:20:32,612
- What an idea!
- But, Lettice...
372
00:20:32,696 --> 00:20:35,365
On your first evening home
in a hundred years,
373
00:20:35,448 --> 00:20:37,409
do you think I'd ask people round?
374
00:20:37,534 --> 00:20:42,205
I knew you'd be quiet,
and want a tired, family evening.
375
00:20:42,289 --> 00:20:45,250
- That doesn't sound quite...
- I'm not mad to be put on display.
376
00:20:45,375 --> 00:20:47,061
But, of course, I'd love
to meet your friends.
377
00:20:47,085 --> 00:20:47,919
Thank you.
378
00:20:48,044 --> 00:20:50,547
- Have you forgotten...
- No, George.
379
00:20:50,630 --> 00:20:53,842
No-one is coming to
this house tonight.
380
00:21:04,603 --> 00:21:06,646
So why is the table
laid for seven?
381
00:21:06,771 --> 00:21:08,523
It's laid for eight-thirty.
382
00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:15,322
Yes, I know,
but there are seven plates.
383
00:21:16,323 --> 00:21:19,576
- Your father...
- Don't involve me in this.
384
00:21:19,951 --> 00:21:22,412
That was last night.
385
00:21:22,662 --> 00:21:24,122
My publisher was
coming to dinner
386
00:21:24,206 --> 00:21:26,666
with his wife and daughter,
wasn't he, George?
387
00:21:26,750 --> 00:21:29,628
Well, he came up the M1,
388
00:21:29,711 --> 00:21:32,255
and then drove
straight into a snow drift.
389
00:21:32,339 --> 00:21:34,758
I cooked and cooked all day,
but they never made it.
390
00:21:34,841 --> 00:21:35,842
Did they, George?
391
00:21:35,926 --> 00:21:38,720
They were picked up by the AA,
and given hot baths,
392
00:21:38,803 --> 00:21:41,097
and warm underclothes,
and hot toddies,
393
00:21:41,181 --> 00:21:44,017
and taken to a hotel.
Weren't they, George?
394
00:21:44,142 --> 00:21:46,311
That's where they
telephoned us from.
395
00:21:46,436 --> 00:21:50,690
And they gave them hot curry
and mulligatawny soup,
396
00:21:50,815 --> 00:21:55,654
and got them back to London
in a centrally-heated train.
397
00:21:56,112 --> 00:21:58,657
And no-one is coming
to dinner tonight.
398
00:22:04,579 --> 00:22:06,581
Mother, you're up to something.
399
00:22:06,665 --> 00:22:09,167
I know that Lady Macbeth look.
400
00:22:09,292 --> 00:22:11,336
George, where are you going?
401
00:22:11,419 --> 00:22:13,088
- To change.
- Whatever for?
402
00:22:13,171 --> 00:22:14,798
- I'm wet.
- No, stay here.
403
00:22:14,881 --> 00:22:17,968
George! Stay where you are.
I need you here.
404
00:22:18,093 --> 00:22:19,719
Maybe I could
see over the house.
405
00:22:19,803 --> 00:22:21,304
I'd really like to.
406
00:22:21,388 --> 00:22:23,014
Er... Have you lived here
all your life?
407
00:22:23,098 --> 00:22:25,100
Certainly not.
I had to earn it.
408
00:22:25,225 --> 00:22:26,851
Well, it's beautiful.
409
00:22:26,935 --> 00:22:29,497
It's the kind of house my mother
would give her eye teeth to have.
410
00:22:29,521 --> 00:22:31,564
A very peculiar form of barter.
411
00:22:31,731 --> 00:22:34,359
I always thought it was
done with beads and shells.
412
00:22:34,484 --> 00:22:37,070
- I, er...
- Now where, George?
413
00:22:37,195 --> 00:22:40,156
Oh, I was just...
shifting my weight.
414
00:22:40,282 --> 00:22:43,118
I... I thought I might try to open
some of the upstairs windows.
415
00:22:43,201 --> 00:22:46,204
You know, to draw
the hot air up and out.
416
00:22:46,288 --> 00:22:48,999
They're locked, too.
But the walls will crack soon,
417
00:22:49,082 --> 00:22:51,418
so there will be a
slight ventilation.
418
00:22:51,501 --> 00:22:53,586
Darling, I'm beginning
to stick to my clothes.
419
00:22:53,670 --> 00:22:55,672
Do you think we could go
to my room and change?
420
00:22:55,755 --> 00:22:58,466
Well, let's see if
we can get this open.
421
00:22:58,925 --> 00:23:00,343
Oh, damn.
422
00:23:00,427 --> 00:23:02,637
- I'll try from the other side.
- Good.
423
00:23:02,721 --> 00:23:04,681
Oh, look, can I help?
424
00:23:05,432 --> 00:23:07,726
That's the... girl.
425
00:23:10,979 --> 00:23:12,731
Yes!
426
00:23:12,814 --> 00:23:16,276
Oh, there we go.
I'll just get the cases.
427
00:23:17,819 --> 00:23:20,113
I didn't expect
things to be easy.
428
00:23:20,238 --> 00:23:21,865
Help us, Mr Mason.
429
00:23:21,990 --> 00:23:23,867
It looks as though
we're going to need it.
430
00:23:23,950 --> 00:23:25,870
- My dear, I'd be only too...
- We're so in love.
431
00:23:26,036 --> 00:23:29,539
I'd be only too pleased.
It's been a full day, though.
432
00:23:29,622 --> 00:23:31,541
- I'm counting on you.
- Oh.
433
00:23:31,666 --> 00:23:32,876
Here we are.
434
00:23:32,959 --> 00:23:34,961
I'll hump these upstairs.
435
00:23:35,086 --> 00:23:37,505
Tote that bag.
Lift that bale.
436
00:23:39,841 --> 00:23:41,634
Supper still at eight-thirty?
437
00:23:41,718 --> 00:23:44,078
Er... On the evidence of
the last thirty years, I expect so,
438
00:23:44,137 --> 00:23:47,349
but this evening is beginning
to be a bit untypical.
439
00:23:48,475 --> 00:23:50,977
You didn't think
I'd make it, did you?
440
00:23:51,061 --> 00:23:52,479
- Er...
- Say nothing.
441
00:23:52,562 --> 00:23:54,397
It's a relief to me as well.
442
00:24:00,570 --> 00:24:02,072
Potatoes, dear.
443
00:24:02,655 --> 00:24:04,407
Why the hell did you tell 'em
444
00:24:04,491 --> 00:24:06,284
that we were not
having people to supper?
445
00:24:06,368 --> 00:24:07,786
Well, we're not.
446
00:24:07,911 --> 00:24:09,746
No-one's getting through
that door tonight.
447
00:24:09,829 --> 00:24:13,541
No-one's coming into my house
to witness this spectacle.
448
00:24:13,625 --> 00:24:16,294
- Where are they?
- Upstairs, changing.
449
00:24:16,378 --> 00:24:20,006
It is understood that no-one
comes through that door tonight.
450
00:24:20,090 --> 00:24:22,258
Is it too late to ring them?
451
00:24:22,384 --> 00:24:25,053
Why did you make it
get this far?
452
00:24:25,136 --> 00:24:28,098
Why didn't you ask them?
Why didn't you speak out?
453
00:24:28,181 --> 00:24:31,518
I know it's not your life,
but something has to be done.
454
00:24:31,684 --> 00:24:33,186
I'm not sure that I follow.
455
00:24:33,353 --> 00:24:34,813
Is that all you have to say
456
00:24:34,896 --> 00:24:37,399
in the face of complete social ruin?
457
00:24:37,565 --> 00:24:38,983
It all seemed to
go very well to me.
458
00:24:39,109 --> 00:24:40,110
Very well?
459
00:24:40,193 --> 00:24:41,861
What went off very well?
460
00:24:41,945 --> 00:24:45,073
My broadmindedness is a by-word.
461
00:24:45,198 --> 00:24:47,075
Black is beautiful.
462
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:49,994
I was even prepared to have a
woman-to-woman talk with her,
463
00:24:50,078 --> 00:24:53,415
but if you can show me to
what sort of which I was talking.
464
00:24:53,498 --> 00:24:55,291
And you said it went off well.
465
00:24:55,375 --> 00:24:57,335
Well, Laurie looks well,
that's all I'm saying.
466
00:24:57,419 --> 00:24:58,628
He does not.
467
00:24:58,711 --> 00:25:01,631
He looks fine,
and he sounds warped,
468
00:25:01,756 --> 00:25:05,718
and he acts with hostility
to me, his only mother.
469
00:25:05,802 --> 00:25:07,137
He was always a bit sardonic.
470
00:25:07,387 --> 00:25:09,347
No, never to me.
471
00:25:09,931 --> 00:25:11,891
He always made an
exception with me.
472
00:25:11,975 --> 00:25:13,351
He's been mentally disturbed,
473
00:25:13,435 --> 00:25:16,479
and I don't think
for a minute he's been cured.
474
00:25:16,563 --> 00:25:18,773
- You said just now...
- I don't care what I said.
475
00:25:18,898 --> 00:25:20,233
It's what I've seen.
476
00:25:20,358 --> 00:25:23,945
To me, Jo seems a very nice...
477
00:25:24,195 --> 00:25:26,573
A very nice what?
That's what I want to know.
478
00:25:26,656 --> 00:25:27,866
Young person.
479
00:25:28,032 --> 00:25:30,743
Don't try the staffroom
prevarication on me.
480
00:25:30,827 --> 00:25:34,789
To me, she appears a
very pleasant young girl.
481
00:25:35,748 --> 00:25:37,459
Didn't she...
482
00:25:37,542 --> 00:25:39,043
Doesn't she...
483
00:25:39,127 --> 00:25:43,256
Surely you're not denying
that Miss Delaney is a trifle,
484
00:25:43,339 --> 00:25:47,635
Oh, the merest
soupçon,
unfeminine?
485
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:51,306
George Mason, look me in the
eye when I'm shouting at you.
486
00:25:51,431 --> 00:25:55,560
Lettice, I've had a bitter day,
and I need...
487
00:25:56,978 --> 00:25:58,813
piano this weekend.
488
00:25:58,897 --> 00:26:00,106
Piano!
Do you hear me?
489
00:26:00,190 --> 00:26:01,750
If anybody bitches,
or raises their voice,
490
00:26:01,774 --> 00:26:03,693
or bares his or her breast,
491
00:26:03,818 --> 00:26:05,820
or tears their hair,
or anybody else's, I...
492
00:26:05,904 --> 00:26:08,198
I walk straight out
of this house, and...
493
00:26:08,698 --> 00:26:10,533
spend the night with my brother.
494
00:26:10,617 --> 00:26:12,744
I want peace.
I need peace in this house.
495
00:26:12,827 --> 00:26:14,496
I like Jo a great deal.
496
00:26:16,164 --> 00:26:18,500
I think she's a good person,
and she is good to Laurie.
497
00:26:18,583 --> 00:26:20,335
My God, I hope not.
498
00:26:20,460 --> 00:26:22,045
And that is all I
am prepared to say.
499
00:26:22,128 --> 00:26:23,880
- Now, let me say...
- Don't interrupt!
500
00:26:23,922 --> 00:26:25,298
I like her.
501
00:26:25,632 --> 00:26:27,026
And you'll be doing
us all a service
502
00:26:27,050 --> 00:26:28,760
if you will try and
do the same thing.
503
00:26:28,843 --> 00:26:30,261
Is that understood?
504
00:26:31,262 --> 00:26:33,348
Laurie is our son,
and he has a perfect right
505
00:26:33,389 --> 00:26:34,992
to live the life he wants
with the girl...
506
00:26:35,016 --> 00:26:36,726
the young person that he wants.
507
00:26:36,809 --> 00:26:39,729
And the sooner that you
accept that, the better.
508
00:26:40,313 --> 00:26:42,398
I shall never forgive you.
509
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:46,694
That's sanctimonious, two-faced,
gutless escapism.
510
00:26:46,778 --> 00:26:49,656
My God, the Havendons!
511
00:26:49,781 --> 00:26:51,074
Tell her I'm ill.
512
00:26:51,199 --> 00:26:53,326
Tell her I'm ditzy.
We're all dead.
513
00:26:53,368 --> 00:26:54,744
You know how she loves scandal.
514
00:26:54,869 --> 00:26:56,788
But now that she's here,
why not...
515
00:26:56,913 --> 00:26:59,707
Get the door before Laurie
or worse opens the door.
516
00:27:01,417 --> 00:27:03,002
It's stuck again.
517
00:27:04,170 --> 00:27:06,548
Is that Laurie on the stairs?
He'll let them in.
518
00:27:06,589 --> 00:27:09,717
- Well, why not?
- Ssh! They'll hear you.
519
00:27:10,635 --> 00:27:12,515
Do you think they're
having trouble with Laurie?
520
00:27:12,554 --> 00:27:14,430
I'm having trouble
with my circulation.
521
00:27:15,515 --> 00:27:18,226
Tell her we have
some curious infection.
522
00:27:18,309 --> 00:27:20,311
That at least is true.
523
00:27:20,645 --> 00:27:22,146
Perhaps he's turned violent.
524
00:27:22,230 --> 00:27:24,607
We have
some curious infection!
525
00:27:24,649 --> 00:27:26,442
- George!
- It's freezing!
526
00:27:28,653 --> 00:27:31,197
Ssh! Go away!
527
00:27:31,823 --> 00:27:33,366
Do you think we
ought to hang about?
528
00:27:43,918 --> 00:27:45,271
That was the worst
moment of my life.
529
00:27:45,295 --> 00:27:46,629
They'll never speak to me again.
530
00:27:46,671 --> 00:27:49,173
She will, if it's only
to speak my epitaph.
531
00:27:49,299 --> 00:27:51,718
It... It was
the Havendons, wasn't it?
532
00:27:51,801 --> 00:27:53,303
Yes.
533
00:27:56,180 --> 00:27:58,391
We shouldn't have come.
534
00:27:58,600 --> 00:28:00,727
Would she ever like
me, do you think?
535
00:28:00,810 --> 00:28:01,954
Well, there's
a million to one chance
536
00:28:01,978 --> 00:28:05,064
that she could open her arms
and say "Laurie, I love Jo."
537
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:07,275
If she had, I would have choked.
538
00:28:07,317 --> 00:28:09,235
Well, thank God I warned you.
539
00:28:09,569 --> 00:28:11,029
Your father's all right.
540
00:28:11,070 --> 00:28:12,113
I like him.
541
00:28:12,155 --> 00:28:13,948
Well, the bits of him
that she's left.
542
00:28:18,661 --> 00:28:21,581
George, is it going to blow up?
543
00:28:21,706 --> 00:28:23,666
Yes, my dear.
I rather think it is.
544
00:28:23,791 --> 00:28:25,668
Happily, I'm ready to die.
545
00:28:25,710 --> 00:28:29,047
My God, they've come back!
546
00:28:29,339 --> 00:28:31,549
Now, leave this to me.
547
00:28:31,674 --> 00:28:33,485
And now
for the weather forecast.
548
00:28:33,509 --> 00:28:35,470
Sleet and snow
are likely to spread south
549
00:28:35,553 --> 00:28:38,431
by the late evening, reaching
the homosexual counties by dawn...
550
00:28:49,400 --> 00:28:52,236
Actually, it was Liz, but, er...
551
00:28:52,487 --> 00:28:53,821
it seemed to work.
552
00:28:53,946 --> 00:28:56,616
Oh, er... she dropped
some flowers on the path.
553
00:28:56,741 --> 00:28:58,785
- Do you want them?
- Lord, no!
554
00:28:58,910 --> 00:29:01,788
It looks like Kew Gardens already.
555
00:29:02,246 --> 00:29:04,791
You know,
I'm quite enjoying this.
556
00:29:04,916 --> 00:29:06,376
Well, that's good news.
557
00:29:20,473 --> 00:29:24,018
I hope the soup is spiced
enough for you, Miss Delaney.
558
00:29:24,227 --> 00:29:26,896
I'm afraid tinned tomato
isn't very exotic.
559
00:29:27,021 --> 00:29:29,982
But it's been Laurie's
favourite since he was five.
560
00:29:30,108 --> 00:29:32,902
It's unbelievable.
I never tasted anything like it.
561
00:29:32,944 --> 00:29:34,320
Red pepper.
562
00:29:34,445 --> 00:29:36,364
Yes, it's always been tomato.
563
00:29:36,489 --> 00:29:38,616
And we're having roast
chicken, of course.
564
00:29:38,700 --> 00:29:41,494
Yes, it was always roast
chicken for birthdays.
565
00:29:41,619 --> 00:29:44,455
I'll have a bet with you
it'll be jelly to follow.
566
00:29:44,997 --> 00:29:46,749
It's custard.
567
00:29:46,874 --> 00:29:48,835
But with fruit salad.
568
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:50,962
Mmm, now I know I'm home.
569
00:29:51,462 --> 00:29:53,589
- Was it a good journey?
- Oh, marvellous.
570
00:29:53,673 --> 00:29:56,384
- Awful.
- Oh, come on, it wasn't that bad.
571
00:29:56,426 --> 00:29:59,679
We got talking to
this young man.
572
00:30:00,221 --> 00:30:01,514
Well, he was young, anyway.
573
00:30:01,556 --> 00:30:03,307
Yes, I thought he
was a young man, too.
574
00:30:03,349 --> 00:30:05,601
Suddenly, he said,
"I'm going to have a baby."
575
00:30:05,643 --> 00:30:07,478
We'd just left the station.
576
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,605
The awful thing was,
we congratulated him.
577
00:30:09,647 --> 00:30:11,023
We thought he'd meant his wife,
578
00:30:11,065 --> 00:30:12,734
the long-haired girl next to him.
579
00:30:12,775 --> 00:30:14,944
Oh, yes, we thought that
she was his wife.
580
00:30:14,986 --> 00:30:17,447
The next minute, he was
on the floor in labour.
581
00:30:18,865 --> 00:30:20,491
How appalling.
582
00:30:20,658 --> 00:30:22,243
A man?
583
00:30:22,660 --> 00:30:24,579
- English?
- Oh, yes.
584
00:30:24,620 --> 00:30:27,165
Which class were you travelling?
585
00:30:27,749 --> 00:30:29,000
Well, it wasn't really a man.
586
00:30:29,041 --> 00:30:31,335
I mean, he was just
dressed like one.
587
00:30:31,836 --> 00:30:34,088
But the girl, you see,
that we thought was the wife,
588
00:30:34,172 --> 00:30:38,050
turned out to be the husband
dressed in a sort of, um... er...
589
00:30:38,176 --> 00:30:40,052
you know,
with beads and things, and...
590
00:30:40,470 --> 00:30:42,180
Well, he held her hand,
and told her...
591
00:30:42,221 --> 00:30:44,098
told her stories of unlikely births,
592
00:30:44,182 --> 00:30:46,225
while Jo delivered the baby.
593
00:30:46,517 --> 00:30:48,311
Jo was marvellous.
594
00:30:59,322 --> 00:31:02,825
I've always seen your books
as a kind of escape, Mrs Mason.
595
00:31:02,867 --> 00:31:05,787
I've always seen them
as a higher standard of living.
596
00:31:05,828 --> 00:31:08,206
I reread some while
I was in hospital.
597
00:31:08,790 --> 00:31:10,208
The psychiatrist couldn't believe
598
00:31:10,249 --> 00:31:13,002
that they were written
by a happily married woman.
599
00:31:14,462 --> 00:31:17,548
Miss Delaney, how long
have you been an air steward?
600
00:31:17,673 --> 00:31:19,175
...ess.
601
00:31:19,509 --> 00:31:23,221
I'm longing to introduce Jo to
everyone I went to school with.
602
00:31:23,304 --> 00:31:25,184
I think Arthur's going to be
knocked out by her.
603
00:31:25,264 --> 00:31:28,684
Oh, Arthur's much too languid
for anything so strenuous.
604
00:31:28,768 --> 00:31:31,187
Really?
I handle that type rather well.
605
00:31:31,687 --> 00:31:33,356
I'm sure.
606
00:31:33,564 --> 00:31:35,564
- George?
- Yeah, I'm going to get some cold water.
607
00:31:35,608 --> 00:31:37,443
I think that's what I need.
608
00:31:37,735 --> 00:31:41,364
Laurie, how long have
you known Miss Delaney?
609
00:31:41,405 --> 00:31:42,782
Er, three weeks.
610
00:31:42,865 --> 00:31:44,283
Is that including weekends?
611
00:31:44,367 --> 00:31:46,828
Yes, and feast days,
and bank holidays,
612
00:31:46,911 --> 00:31:49,914
and quarter days, the lot.
Three weeks.
613
00:31:50,039 --> 00:31:53,417
- The best time of my life.
- Darling!
614
00:31:54,335 --> 00:31:56,671
There's not a drop of cold water
615
00:31:56,712 --> 00:31:58,172
anywhere in the house.
616
00:31:58,256 --> 00:32:02,051
George, I wish you'd stop
torturing me with these newsflashes.
617
00:32:02,134 --> 00:32:03,845
Before you carve seconds,
618
00:32:03,886 --> 00:32:06,764
I think you'd better
say your few words.
619
00:32:06,848 --> 00:32:08,975
Oh, I do wish you'd
stop telling me that.
620
00:32:09,058 --> 00:32:11,269
Is that few enough, Mother?
621
00:32:11,853 --> 00:32:16,148
I have nothing to say beyond,
"Welcome home to both of you."
622
00:32:17,316 --> 00:32:19,402
That really is nice, Mr Mason.
Thank you.
623
00:32:19,485 --> 00:32:21,904
I needed to hear
that from someone.
624
00:32:23,739 --> 00:32:28,870
Miss Delaney, you wear your hair
quite short for flying.
625
00:32:28,995 --> 00:32:31,289
This?
Oh, it's only a midi-Afro.
626
00:32:31,414 --> 00:32:33,207
Don't you like it?
627
00:32:33,374 --> 00:32:35,084
I think it's stunning.
628
00:32:35,877 --> 00:32:40,298
Jo, Miss Delaney, is rather
an odd name for a gir...
629
00:32:40,381 --> 00:32:43,009
for a young person of your sex.
630
00:32:43,885 --> 00:32:45,803
I think I'd better
water the plants again.
631
00:32:45,928 --> 00:32:48,931
I have to do it every few
minutes to keep them upright.
632
00:32:53,185 --> 00:32:57,732
You wear uniquely masculine
clothes, Miss Delaney.
633
00:32:57,857 --> 00:33:00,192
Oh, these? We're giving them
to Oxfam next week.
634
00:33:00,234 --> 00:33:03,779
But it's fun in the dark.
Everyone mistakes me for Laurie.
635
00:33:03,821 --> 00:33:06,091
But that's where it's at these days,
so maybe I shouldn't worry.
636
00:33:06,115 --> 00:33:08,284
Just enjoy being a man.
637
00:33:09,994 --> 00:33:12,204
Where did you two meet?
638
00:33:12,246 --> 00:33:15,124
- In a cinema queue.
- Not very romantic.
639
00:33:15,958 --> 00:33:20,046
George, perhaps now you'll say
640
00:33:20,087 --> 00:33:23,049
what you've been wanting to say.
641
00:33:23,841 --> 00:33:25,968
Was it a very big queue?
642
00:33:27,887 --> 00:33:30,556
Miss Delaney, when did
you last wear a skirt?
643
00:33:35,061 --> 00:33:37,438
Tell us what's on
your mind, George.
644
00:33:37,772 --> 00:33:40,650
The lavatories were covered
in graffiti again today.
645
00:33:41,108 --> 00:33:42,586
If the walls were
anything to judge by,
646
00:33:42,610 --> 00:33:44,946
the entire intellectual
effort of the school
647
00:33:45,029 --> 00:33:46,656
goes into masturbation.
648
00:33:46,906 --> 00:33:49,700
Don't try to sidetrack
the issue by being vulgar.
649
00:33:49,784 --> 00:33:51,953
Mother, are you
and Father all right?
650
00:33:52,036 --> 00:33:54,956
I mean, you've hardly spoken
a sane word since we arrived here.
651
00:33:55,456 --> 00:33:56,582
Fair average.
652
00:33:57,041 --> 00:33:59,251
- George!
- Are you...
653
00:33:59,293 --> 00:34:01,462
Look, if you're going to
ask me any more information
654
00:34:01,545 --> 00:34:03,172
about the sizes
of cinema queues,
655
00:34:03,214 --> 00:34:05,925
I may get a second
opinion on the pair of you.
656
00:37:52,318 --> 00:37:55,154
Oh, listen, you don't
usually work this late.
657
00:37:56,697 --> 00:37:58,449
Do you still love me?
658
00:37:58,616 --> 00:38:00,616
Darling, how many more
times do I have to tell you?
659
00:38:00,659 --> 00:38:02,286
I'm committed.
660
00:38:03,746 --> 00:38:04,872
Have you slept?
661
00:38:04,997 --> 00:38:07,374
Oh, I couldn't get near the bed
662
00:38:07,416 --> 00:38:09,627
for the warm glow
from the springs.
663
00:38:10,127 --> 00:38:11,462
I tried lying on the floor.
664
00:38:11,503 --> 00:38:13,714
Even the bloody
dust is scorching.
665
00:38:13,756 --> 00:38:15,925
Hey, what's so funny?
666
00:38:16,050 --> 00:38:18,510
Well, it's snowing outside,
it's a foot deep already,
667
00:38:18,594 --> 00:38:20,095
and here we are like a fish fry.
668
00:38:20,387 --> 00:38:21,722
- Hey, move over.
- Oh, no.
669
00:38:21,847 --> 00:38:24,934
- Come on.
- It's hot. It's hot enough.
670
00:38:26,977 --> 00:38:28,771
"Hey...
'Hmm?
671
00:38:30,564 --> 00:38:32,483
Oh, we shouldn't
have come, you know.
672
00:38:32,566 --> 00:38:34,276
Oh, don't apologise.
673
00:38:35,277 --> 00:38:38,280
Do you think I could make it?
Here, in this house?
674
00:38:38,364 --> 00:38:41,867
Well, you're not doing badly,
and the conditions aren't ideal.
675
00:38:43,285 --> 00:38:45,996
I thought she would at
least have been polite.
676
00:38:46,121 --> 00:38:49,041
Uptight, yeah, you know,
but polite.
677
00:38:49,500 --> 00:38:52,628
At her age, the curlier the hair,
the curlier the lip.
678
00:38:53,212 --> 00:38:56,090
Now, I can get mine
straightened out at the barber's...
679
00:38:56,257 --> 00:38:57,758
with a struggle.
680
00:38:58,217 --> 00:38:59,635
Let's make love.
681
00:38:59,718 --> 00:39:01,804
Now he asks me.
682
00:39:01,845 --> 00:39:03,055
Please?
683
00:39:03,097 --> 00:39:04,223
No.
684
00:39:04,265 --> 00:39:06,517
That is,
"I'm sorry, no."
685
00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:08,018
Why not?
686
00:39:08,102 --> 00:39:10,145
Well, it's like having it off
in the British Museum.
687
00:39:10,187 --> 00:39:13,023
I do some of my best work
in the British Museum.
688
00:39:13,482 --> 00:39:15,859
- Whose bed?
- Well, here, of course.
689
00:39:15,985 --> 00:39:17,945
I thought we were
going to do this for pleasure.
690
00:39:18,028 --> 00:39:19,822
Well, there are other places.
691
00:39:19,905 --> 00:39:21,407
The wardrobe? The drawers?
692
00:39:21,907 --> 00:39:24,076
Look, there'll be other nights.
693
00:39:25,244 --> 00:39:27,454
Not tonight, there won't.
694
00:39:27,830 --> 00:39:29,581
Your room's boiling.
695
00:39:29,623 --> 00:39:32,293
That only leaves George's bed
and the garage.
696
00:39:32,334 --> 00:39:34,420
Well, it's ridiculous!
697
00:39:36,547 --> 00:39:37,965
Come on. Come with me.
698
00:39:38,007 --> 00:39:39,883
Where are we going?
699
00:39:40,009 --> 00:39:41,260
Ssh!
700
00:39:46,849 --> 00:39:48,809
What the hell are you doing?
701
00:39:48,892 --> 00:39:52,146
- Monitoring.
- Oh, leave them alone.
702
00:39:53,188 --> 00:39:55,357
At this time of night,
it's unthinkable.
703
00:39:55,441 --> 00:39:58,027
- Get back to bed.
- But they'll be gone tomorrow.
704
00:39:58,152 --> 00:40:00,696
And it's not for me to
speak ill behind anyone's back
705
00:40:00,738 --> 00:40:03,866
when I can be saying it to their face.
706
00:40:09,830 --> 00:40:11,415
What are you suggesting?
707
00:40:11,457 --> 00:40:13,876
Definitely not a cup of Horlick's.
708
00:40:15,878 --> 00:40:17,588
It will be like
air conditioning here.
709
00:40:18,297 --> 00:40:19,465
Do you mean it?
710
00:40:19,506 --> 00:40:21,508
Here, on the floor.
711
00:40:21,967 --> 00:40:24,053
Let's stop discussing it
and get on with it.
712
00:40:30,100 --> 00:40:32,644
- Darling?
- What?
713
00:40:32,728 --> 00:40:33,979
Nothing.
714
00:40:35,814 --> 00:40:37,066
Kiss me.
715
00:40:37,316 --> 00:40:38,650
Mmm.
716
00:40:39,610 --> 00:40:41,528
What's wrong?
717
00:40:41,653 --> 00:40:43,572
Cramp! It's a cramp.
718
00:40:43,697 --> 00:40:45,866
Cramp.
Er... how are you doing?
719
00:40:45,991 --> 00:40:47,326
I thought I was doing my best.
720
00:40:47,451 --> 00:40:49,036
I didn't lay the bloody floor.
721
00:40:49,161 --> 00:40:51,538
- You're not going to lay me either.
- Yet.
722
00:40:51,663 --> 00:40:53,957
Would the top of the dining
table be any easier for you?
723
00:40:53,999 --> 00:40:55,435
You're beginning to
sound like my mother.
724
00:40:55,459 --> 00:40:56,686
Well, that that might excite you.
725
00:40:56,710 --> 00:40:59,463
That's a bloody
personal remark to make!
726
00:40:59,505 --> 00:41:01,465
You're not putting this onto me.
727
00:41:01,590 --> 00:41:03,217
I told you I liked the idea.
728
00:41:03,342 --> 00:41:05,177
How the hell could I
waft hot and cold
729
00:41:05,219 --> 00:41:07,513
in this bloody temperature?
730
00:41:09,390 --> 00:41:11,100
Look what we have here.
731
00:41:12,226 --> 00:41:15,562
Look, I'm going to make love
whether you want me or not.
732
00:41:15,646 --> 00:41:17,731
Whether you can or not.
733
00:41:18,065 --> 00:41:21,151
- You bitch.
- I didn't mean that. I didn't.
734
00:41:21,235 --> 00:41:23,570
I know exactly what you meant.
735
00:41:23,695 --> 00:41:26,824
Look, I can't make love and
apologise at the same time.
736
00:41:29,618 --> 00:41:31,787
We never had this
difficulty in London.
737
00:41:32,454 --> 00:41:34,873
Not even with the landlady
on the stairs.
738
00:41:36,083 --> 00:41:37,709
Undress me.
739
00:41:38,252 --> 00:41:40,754
- What?
- Undress me.
740
00:41:42,381 --> 00:41:44,341
Well, don't you
think it's rather cold?
741
00:41:44,425 --> 00:41:46,844
Coming, as I do,
from a hot country?
742
00:41:47,761 --> 00:41:49,847
It's no good here.
743
00:41:49,972 --> 00:41:51,890
Oh, look...
744
00:41:52,558 --> 00:41:54,309
We've got to a stage now,
we toss a coin,
745
00:41:54,476 --> 00:41:56,603
"Do we or don't we?"
746
00:41:57,604 --> 00:41:59,148
- Do we?
- Well, don't we?!
747
00:41:59,231 --> 00:42:00,858
No, not so loud.
748
00:42:01,358 --> 00:42:03,193
Look, I can't put a
notice on the door.
749
00:42:03,235 --> 00:42:04,987
Coitus don't-interruptus.
750
00:42:10,033 --> 00:42:13,495
I'm not interrupting
anything, I hope?
751
00:42:13,787 --> 00:42:16,707
Can't I even kiss Jo
without you breaking in on us?
752
00:42:16,790 --> 00:42:18,876
If you're hot,
why don't you stand
753
00:42:19,001 --> 00:42:21,587
in front of
the refrigerator, darling?
754
00:42:22,629 --> 00:42:25,007
I poured myself a glass
of water in the bathroom,
755
00:42:25,048 --> 00:42:26,925
and it cracked the glass.
756
00:42:27,009 --> 00:42:29,553
I came down to see if
we had a plastic cup.
757
00:42:29,678 --> 00:42:32,473
I'm a little embarrassed
to find we have.
758
00:42:48,655 --> 00:42:50,491
Did we disturb you, Mrs Mason?
759
00:42:50,574 --> 00:42:51,825
When you are my age,
760
00:42:51,950 --> 00:42:54,953
you will learn to take
all natural and unnatural...
761
00:42:55,162 --> 00:42:58,415
catastrophe in your ample stride.
762
00:42:58,540 --> 00:43:03,086
Laurie, you're wearing the
same pyjamas as your friend.
763
00:43:03,837 --> 00:43:06,632
Well, think yourself lucky
we're not both dressed like you.
764
00:43:06,715 --> 00:43:08,967
I do most profoundly.
765
00:43:09,009 --> 00:43:11,929
Not that I consider decency
to be a question of luck.
766
00:43:12,012 --> 00:43:15,349
It's something you commit yourself to
at a very early age.
767
00:43:15,390 --> 00:43:16,517
Or not.
768
00:43:16,558 --> 00:43:18,560
What a pretty nightdress,
Mrs Mason.
769
00:43:18,602 --> 00:43:20,729
It's pretty appropriate, yes.
770
00:43:20,854 --> 00:43:22,481
Or should I call it a négligée?
771
00:43:22,523 --> 00:43:23,941
If you don't know by now,
772
00:43:24,024 --> 00:43:26,360
there's little point
in my telling you.
773
00:43:27,778 --> 00:43:29,488
One of the stairs creaks.
774
00:43:29,571 --> 00:43:31,031
She must've been stalking us.
775
00:43:31,073 --> 00:43:32,800
But what if she'd come
down five minutes later?
776
00:43:32,824 --> 00:43:35,220
- Oh, for God's sake, don't.
- I would have died on the spot.
777
00:43:35,244 --> 00:43:37,621
So would she, and I expect
I would have followed.
778
00:43:37,704 --> 00:43:39,384
With three dead bodies
littering the floor,
779
00:43:39,456 --> 00:43:41,500
that only leaves Dad to
die of shock and grief.
780
00:43:41,583 --> 00:43:44,378
Well, I'm going to bed.
I simply can't face her.
781
00:43:45,087 --> 00:43:48,215
Do you both plan to spend
the entire night down here,
782
00:43:48,298 --> 00:43:49,633
one way or another?
783
00:43:49,675 --> 00:43:52,135
Mother, we're not
planning anything.
784
00:43:52,678 --> 00:43:56,139
Even if we're not happy,
can't we all smile at the same time?
785
00:43:56,181 --> 00:43:59,226
What
is the time?
I haven't the slightest idea.
786
00:43:59,351 --> 00:44:01,770
The heat seems to have
stopped the church clock,
787
00:44:01,853 --> 00:44:04,147
and that's a
quarter of a mile away.
788
00:44:06,233 --> 00:44:08,193
I wondered where
you'd all go to.
789
00:44:08,235 --> 00:44:10,112
What a waste of intelligence.
790
00:44:10,195 --> 00:44:13,073
How far could anyone
go in this heat?
791
00:44:13,156 --> 00:44:16,785
I had to stop twice
just coming downstairs.
792
00:44:16,910 --> 00:44:18,870
For a breath, or to hear better?
793
00:44:18,954 --> 00:44:21,582
I never listen to other
people's conversations,
794
00:44:21,665 --> 00:44:23,709
except when it's
my duty to overhear.
795
00:44:23,750 --> 00:44:25,460
True, true.
796
00:44:26,003 --> 00:44:27,754
So you can't sleep either,
Mr Mason?
797
00:44:27,879 --> 00:44:30,173
There is some difference
between my husband's
798
00:44:30,257 --> 00:44:32,050
waking and sleeping state.
799
00:44:32,134 --> 00:44:34,511
Sorry, if you just tell me
what the right thing to say is.
800
00:44:34,553 --> 00:44:37,931
Oh, take no notice of me
until I absolutely insist.
801
00:44:38,056 --> 00:44:40,976
Those pyjamas suit you perfectly.
802
00:44:41,018 --> 00:44:42,769
How well they fit.
803
00:44:42,811 --> 00:44:44,563
What the devil
is the time, anyway?
804
00:44:44,646 --> 00:44:46,648
Oh, I think it's somewhere
between three and four.
805
00:44:46,690 --> 00:44:48,817
Oh, it sounds worse when
you put it into words.
806
00:44:48,942 --> 00:44:50,902
Can I borrow one of your
sleeping pills, dear?
807
00:44:50,986 --> 00:44:52,904
How does one repay a sleeping pill?
808
00:44:52,946 --> 00:44:54,906
Oh, help yourself.
Take them all.
809
00:44:54,990 --> 00:44:56,908
Oh, let's get back to bed.
810
00:44:57,326 --> 00:44:59,453
After you, Miss Delaney.
811
00:44:59,578 --> 00:45:01,830
How much more of term
is left, Mr Mason?
812
00:45:01,955 --> 00:45:03,206
A week.
813
00:45:03,332 --> 00:45:05,876
You'll last that long.
You'll look good for years yet.
814
00:45:06,001 --> 00:45:09,463
Have you any idea, Jo,
how many, many, many days
815
00:45:09,546 --> 00:45:11,423
there are in one school week?
816
00:45:11,715 --> 00:45:14,676
You're always setting us
some sort of problem, George.
817
00:45:14,801 --> 00:45:16,928
Why don't you set us an example?
818
00:45:17,012 --> 00:45:19,014
So much more useful.
819
00:45:19,222 --> 00:45:21,683
I know, why don't we all go
for a walk in the snow?
820
00:45:22,976 --> 00:45:26,021
Well, at least freezing out there
must be better than frying in here.
821
00:45:26,104 --> 00:45:27,731
I'll come.
I love the snow.
822
00:45:27,856 --> 00:45:29,775
Such enthusiasm.
823
00:45:29,816 --> 00:45:32,444
You come, Mr Mason.
It'll be good fun.
824
00:45:32,486 --> 00:45:34,363
Besides, it's dangerous
to lose too much salt.
825
00:45:34,404 --> 00:45:37,407
- Come and cool down.
- No, the colonial spirit left me years ago.
826
00:45:37,491 --> 00:45:39,076
You go, Lettice.
827
00:45:39,159 --> 00:45:42,287
Don't be ridiculous.
The shock'd kill me.
828
00:45:42,371 --> 00:45:46,083
What do you think I am? A Finn?
829
00:45:46,166 --> 00:45:48,043
Are you serious?
830
00:45:48,168 --> 00:45:50,212
I never know with you, Laurie.
831
00:45:50,295 --> 00:45:52,172
I think it's a mad idea.
832
00:45:52,631 --> 00:45:55,467
I know, but it looks
so beautifully cold.
833
00:45:55,676 --> 00:45:57,636
Oh, it's stuck.
834
00:45:57,678 --> 00:45:59,554
That's a relief.
835
00:45:59,596 --> 00:46:02,891
I know, I'll meet you on
the landing under the loft.
836
00:46:03,016 --> 00:46:04,768
We can get through
the attic window,
837
00:46:04,851 --> 00:46:06,603
and then slide down the roof.
838
00:46:06,687 --> 00:46:10,190
So put on your thickest
trousers and two sweaters.
839
00:46:11,400 --> 00:46:12,776
Don't wait for us.
840
00:46:12,901 --> 00:46:14,152
See you!
841
00:46:14,820 --> 00:46:16,446
Catch their death.
842
00:46:16,738 --> 00:46:19,199
- George?
- Mmm.
843
00:46:19,241 --> 00:46:22,619
If you feel as terrible as you look,
don't go to bed.
844
00:46:22,661 --> 00:46:24,788
You'll never get up.
845
00:46:24,913 --> 00:46:26,415
No, wait, darling.
846
00:46:26,456 --> 00:46:29,459
You didn't...
You obviously didn't notice
847
00:46:29,501 --> 00:46:31,628
they were wearing
the same pyjamas.
848
00:46:31,712 --> 00:46:33,797
At the same time?
How extraordinary.
849
00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:36,717
It's when I'm talking to myself
that I'm grateful for
850
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:39,553
the glimmer of intelligence
the conversation shows.
851
00:46:39,678 --> 00:46:41,263
No, wait.
852
00:46:41,930 --> 00:46:45,559
I'm deeply sorry to
have to tell you this, but...
853
00:46:46,143 --> 00:46:48,353
she has hairy wrists.
854
00:46:48,645 --> 00:46:50,939
- Who?
- Jo Delaney.
855
00:46:51,022 --> 00:46:53,483
You were probably
looking at Laurie.
856
00:46:53,608 --> 00:46:57,279
If I have to notice everything
in this house for one more minute,
857
00:46:57,320 --> 00:46:59,531
I shall expect
dispensation from the church.
858
00:46:59,656 --> 00:47:01,199
From all the churches.
859
00:47:01,283 --> 00:47:03,994
Lettice, it is some time
on a hot winter's morning.
860
00:47:04,035 --> 00:47:05,662
My eyes are full of sand,
861
00:47:05,704 --> 00:47:07,581
every now and then
you seem to open your mouth
862
00:47:07,664 --> 00:47:10,417
and say something, which
may or may not make sense.
863
00:47:10,625 --> 00:47:14,337
If you are driving at anything
that I ought to say, or do, or feel,
864
00:47:14,379 --> 00:47:18,049
at least wait until I have
faculties enough to understand you.
865
00:47:23,472 --> 00:47:25,766
What are we going
to do with these?
866
00:47:27,100 --> 00:47:29,811
Come on, darling.
Come on, trust me.
867
00:47:29,895 --> 00:47:31,605
Now watch the steps.
868
00:47:40,030 --> 00:47:42,282
They've gone.
They were serious.
869
00:47:42,365 --> 00:47:44,576
Unfortunately, they'll be back.
870
00:47:44,868 --> 00:47:47,537
But I shall be
in a sleep so sweet that...
871
00:47:48,205 --> 00:47:51,374
even the angels
will bend the knee.
872
00:47:52,125 --> 00:47:55,086
You're quite clear what has to
be done tomorrow?
873
00:47:55,170 --> 00:47:56,213
Today.
874
00:47:56,254 --> 00:47:58,548
I am not, and I
don't want to be.
875
00:47:58,673 --> 00:48:00,884
I've reached my journey's end.
876
00:48:01,009 --> 00:48:03,053
Please give me some indication
877
00:48:03,094 --> 00:48:05,222
that you know
what I'm talking about.
878
00:48:10,060 --> 00:48:12,646
You must tell him
about his friend.
879
00:48:12,729 --> 00:48:14,105
Tell him what?
880
00:48:14,189 --> 00:48:16,525
Tell him that she's not
what he or she or any of us
881
00:48:16,566 --> 00:48:18,652
would love to think she was.
882
00:48:18,735 --> 00:48:20,821
No. Sleep on it.
883
00:48:21,446 --> 00:48:23,865
See if she still looks
the same tomorrow.
884
00:48:23,990 --> 00:48:27,369
George, I've just had
the most awful thought.
885
00:48:27,494 --> 00:48:33,708
What if someone in the village
sees her... him... them... it?
886
00:48:33,792 --> 00:48:37,087
Three o'clock in the morning?
Don't be absurd.
887
00:48:44,553 --> 00:48:47,556
I will be beside you.
888
00:48:47,722 --> 00:48:49,850
You don't have to make
the point all at once.
889
00:48:49,891 --> 00:48:52,936
But you do have to make
it once and for all.
890
00:48:53,603 --> 00:48:56,147
- Is that clear?
- Mmm. Mm-mm-mmm.
891
00:48:56,314 --> 00:49:00,318
George, if you were
half the man Jo is,
892
00:49:00,402 --> 00:49:02,904
we wouldn't have this problem!
893
00:49:03,029 --> 00:49:04,948
George!
894
00:51:28,758 --> 00:51:30,969
Down! Down, boy!
895
00:51:31,094 --> 00:51:32,595
Oh.
896
00:51:32,637 --> 00:51:33,990
What, what?
Sleeping on the job?
897
00:51:34,014 --> 00:51:35,324
Wait till Mother hears about this.
898
00:51:35,348 --> 00:51:36,474
Only forty winks.
899
00:51:36,516 --> 00:51:38,226
Not as many as that, actually.
900
00:51:38,268 --> 00:51:40,020
Didn't you get any
sleep last night?
901
00:51:40,061 --> 00:51:43,189
Oh, I think the sleeping pill's
only just beginning to work now.
902
00:51:43,273 --> 00:51:46,901
Oh, I can't keep my eyes open.
Not that I want to.
903
00:51:47,027 --> 00:51:48,570
You do look a bit
rough round the eyes.
904
00:51:48,611 --> 00:51:49,696
Mmm.
905
00:51:50,447 --> 00:51:55,493
Laurie, has your mother been
saying anything to you?
906
00:51:55,535 --> 00:51:58,038
Anything that you might
feel unable or...
907
00:51:59,664 --> 00:52:02,167
disinclined to discuss, you know?
908
00:52:03,001 --> 00:52:04,669
Dad, are you in
any kind of trouble?
909
00:52:04,711 --> 00:52:07,505
- Because I do wish you'd say...
- No, no, no, no, of course not.
910
00:52:07,547 --> 00:52:08,691
I thought you
might have developed
911
00:52:08,715 --> 00:52:10,216
a taste for boys, or something.
912
00:52:10,258 --> 00:52:13,011
No, only really exceptional
teachers manage that.
913
00:52:13,470 --> 00:52:15,597
The gear suits you, Mr Mason.
914
00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:16,765
Gear...
915
00:52:16,806 --> 00:52:18,058
on!
916
00:52:18,099 --> 00:52:20,327
Yes, a little preposterous for
mid-December, don't you think?
917
00:52:20,351 --> 00:52:23,480
I last wore these in Positano.
918
00:52:25,065 --> 00:52:29,819
George, that particular plant
only blooms once in a lifetime.
919
00:52:29,861 --> 00:52:32,048
I think we've rather forced
the choice of today upon it,
920
00:52:32,072 --> 00:52:34,074
but did you have to
kill it so young?
921
00:52:35,366 --> 00:52:37,535
- I'll go.
- No, stay where you are.
922
00:52:37,577 --> 00:52:39,329
Go where, dear?
923
00:52:39,370 --> 00:52:41,331
Wasn't that the front doorbell?
924
00:52:41,372 --> 00:52:42,957
I didn't hear anything.
925
00:52:42,999 --> 00:52:44,584
I hope you haven't
been overworking
926
00:52:44,626 --> 00:52:46,377
your poor brain again.
927
00:52:46,419 --> 00:52:48,797
You didn't hear anything,
did you, George?
928
00:52:48,922 --> 00:52:50,590
I don't remember.
929
00:52:50,632 --> 00:52:52,217
I'm sure it was the doorbell.
930
00:52:52,258 --> 00:52:54,177
There.
931
00:52:54,219 --> 00:52:55,929
Sit down.
932
00:52:55,970 --> 00:52:58,932
I wish you'd remember
you're on holiday.
933
00:52:58,973 --> 00:53:01,309
It was only the bell
on the cooker.
934
00:53:01,351 --> 00:53:03,728
Turn down the meat,
will you, dear?
935
00:53:03,853 --> 00:53:06,856
- Can't we have a cold lunch?
- Well, I don't see how.
936
00:53:08,942 --> 00:53:11,528
Mother, it
is
the front doorbell.
937
00:53:11,569 --> 00:53:14,364
You know, I do
believe you're right.
938
00:53:14,405 --> 00:53:16,908
Isn't that the
most amazing thing?
939
00:53:16,950 --> 00:53:20,411
The heat is bending
the sound waves.
940
00:53:20,537 --> 00:53:21,996
You go, dear.
941
00:53:22,038 --> 00:53:25,500
No, it might be...
I mean, what if it's the...
942
00:53:25,542 --> 00:53:26,793
I went last night.
943
00:53:26,835 --> 00:53:28,461
I'm sure it's only the milkman.
944
00:53:28,503 --> 00:53:30,922
At this time of day?
He's very, very, very late.
945
00:53:30,964 --> 00:53:33,341
Well, I'm sure he's
welcome whenever he calls.
946
00:53:33,424 --> 00:53:36,344
- Shall I go?
- I'll get rid of her, er... him.
947
00:53:36,636 --> 00:53:39,389
I'll get you an
extra pint, dear.
948
00:53:39,430 --> 00:53:42,016
Dad, what's the matter with her?
949
00:53:42,058 --> 00:53:44,644
She seems perfectly
normal to me.
950
00:53:44,686 --> 00:53:46,747
If she goes on like this,
the only thing that'll keep her
951
00:53:46,771 --> 00:53:48,398
out of a psychiatrist's hands
952
00:53:48,523 --> 00:53:50,275
is sudden death.
953
00:53:50,608 --> 00:53:53,069
That remark defies analysis.
954
00:53:53,820 --> 00:53:57,240
Is there a logical
explanation for all this?
955
00:53:57,282 --> 00:54:00,535
- Ah, well...
- No, I thought not. Thank you.
956
00:54:00,577 --> 00:54:02,495
Ah! Has she, er... he gone?
957
00:54:02,537 --> 00:54:04,372
- Completely.
- Was it the milkman?
958
00:54:04,455 --> 00:54:06,040
In a way.
959
00:54:06,082 --> 00:54:07,625
But I thought I heard
a woman's voice.
960
00:54:07,667 --> 00:54:10,503
Mine, dear.
I've never cut our milkman.
961
00:54:10,545 --> 00:54:12,255
I mean, as well as yours.
962
00:54:12,297 --> 00:54:17,010
Oh, er... you know how uncertain
of themselves some milkmen are.
963
00:54:17,051 --> 00:54:19,095
Mother, if you've taken to
to apologising for me,
964
00:54:19,137 --> 00:54:21,639
even to the Milk Marketing Board...
My God.
965
00:54:21,681 --> 00:54:25,685
Darling, when have you ever
heard me apologise to anyone?
966
00:54:26,561 --> 00:54:29,480
Mmm, before I forget, I'm asking
Arthur Potter round for lunch.
967
00:54:29,522 --> 00:54:31,399
Nyah-ah-ah! More guests!
968
00:54:31,441 --> 00:54:33,276
Oh, sweetheart, be reasonable.
969
00:54:33,359 --> 00:54:35,862
There's hardly enough
oxygen to go around.
970
00:54:35,945 --> 00:54:38,823
I don't mean to be frightful, but
the temperature's still rising.
971
00:54:38,865 --> 00:54:40,617
All right, all right.
For drinks, then.
972
00:54:40,658 --> 00:54:42,535
How about hot Vermouth?
973
00:54:42,577 --> 00:54:43,828
Look at us.
974
00:54:43,870 --> 00:54:46,915
None of us is at their
loveliest in this heat,
975
00:54:46,956 --> 00:54:49,292
and I think Jo has to be
seen at her best.
976
00:54:49,334 --> 00:54:52,295
Any little improvement
helps her. Any of us.
977
00:54:52,378 --> 00:54:54,172
Oops!
978
00:54:57,550 --> 00:54:59,761
Good Lord, there's
a crack over there.
979
00:54:59,886 --> 00:55:01,262
- Where?
- There.
980
00:55:01,304 --> 00:55:02,430
I can't see anything.
981
00:55:02,472 --> 00:55:04,307
Oh, it's only a small crack.
982
00:55:04,349 --> 00:55:08,603
But I'd better tackle it right away.
I'll get my crackle, er, tackle.
983
00:55:09,520 --> 00:55:11,105
Am I calling Arthur, or not?
984
00:55:11,147 --> 00:55:12,907
Darling,
I don't mean to be selfish,
985
00:55:12,941 --> 00:55:15,235
but I can't have that
person in my house.
986
00:55:15,360 --> 00:55:17,570
Mother, he is not that person.
987
00:55:17,612 --> 00:55:18,613
I thought you liked him.
988
00:55:18,655 --> 00:55:21,658
Well, wouldn't it be a
trifle hurtful for him?
989
00:55:21,699 --> 00:55:22,825
Why should it be?
990
00:55:22,867 --> 00:55:24,494
Why should it be hurtful?
991
00:55:24,535 --> 00:55:26,955
Well, he was very...
Oh, he embarrasses me.
992
00:55:27,038 --> 00:55:28,164
Why?
993
00:55:29,082 --> 00:55:30,959
Well, he's so arch.
994
00:55:31,042 --> 00:55:32,961
Mother, he happens
to be my best friend.
995
00:55:33,002 --> 00:55:34,587
But his clothes.
996
00:55:34,629 --> 00:55:36,732
Oh, for God's sake.
What's wrong with his clothes?
997
00:55:36,756 --> 00:55:38,609
Well, during the time
you were inseparable,
998
00:55:38,633 --> 00:55:40,218
they were quite extraordinary.
999
00:55:40,468 --> 00:55:42,053
Do you mean "way out"?
1000
00:55:42,178 --> 00:55:44,555
They were
extraordinarily bright.
1001
00:55:44,597 --> 00:55:46,474
They hurt my eyes.
1002
00:55:46,516 --> 00:55:48,393
I go for bright clothes.
1003
00:55:48,476 --> 00:55:50,895
They were masculine.
1004
00:55:50,937 --> 00:55:53,648
I... I mean, er...
unmasculine.
1005
00:55:53,690 --> 00:55:55,066
I adore gorgeous men.
1006
00:55:55,191 --> 00:55:56,484
The taller the better.
1007
00:55:56,526 --> 00:55:58,569
You can spare me the enthusiasm.
1008
00:55:58,611 --> 00:56:01,406
It must be difficult for a...
a person of your generation
1009
00:56:01,447 --> 00:56:03,116
to sympathise, Mrs Mason.
1010
00:56:03,157 --> 00:56:06,202
My darling child,
I suspect you know very little
1011
00:56:06,327 --> 00:56:08,288
about women of my generation,
1012
00:56:08,329 --> 00:56:09,998
and our difficulties.
1013
00:56:10,039 --> 00:56:13,459
When it comes to sex,
you can't discuss terms with people.
1014
00:56:13,501 --> 00:56:15,837
I never discuss
terms with anyone.
1015
00:56:15,878 --> 00:56:17,672
You never discuss
sex with anyone.
1016
00:56:18,506 --> 00:56:20,300
Can't find me tackle.
1017
00:56:20,675 --> 00:56:22,635
Sex isn't what you wear.
1018
00:56:22,677 --> 00:56:25,513
It's not being face up
or face down in bed.
1019
00:56:25,555 --> 00:56:27,807
Nowadays, it's simply
a matter of personality.
1020
00:56:27,849 --> 00:56:30,268
Mr Mason, you must see
it all the time in school.
1021
00:56:30,310 --> 00:56:32,812
Sex?
It's not part of the curriculum.
1022
00:56:32,854 --> 00:56:35,356
Look, who gives a hell
whether it's a girl or a boy?
1023
00:56:35,398 --> 00:56:37,859
We're all a bit of both,
aren't we, Mrs Mason?
1024
00:56:38,735 --> 00:56:41,487
I bet you don't get many
absolute heteros in your school.
1025
00:56:41,529 --> 00:56:44,699
They're mainly West Indian.
1026
00:56:44,741 --> 00:56:46,885
Sometimes, it's only when
they get their insurance cards
1027
00:56:46,909 --> 00:56:49,120
that you do discover
what sex they are.
1028
00:56:49,162 --> 00:56:52,290
Doesn't it shock you that
the sexes are coming closer together?
1029
00:56:52,332 --> 00:56:54,172
Young people will go on
experimenting, my dear,
1030
00:56:54,208 --> 00:56:56,085
whether my eyebrows
go up or down.
1031
00:56:56,127 --> 00:56:58,463
In my day, the
excitement was in guessing
1032
00:56:58,546 --> 00:57:00,465
which man would
ask you to dance,
1033
00:57:00,506 --> 00:57:02,675
not in guessing
which were the men.
1034
00:57:02,717 --> 00:57:04,802
Nowadays, I guess
it's very chic to boast
1035
00:57:04,844 --> 00:57:06,971
that some of one's
best men friends are women.
1036
00:57:07,221 --> 00:57:10,308
I find it extremely decadent.
1037
00:57:10,600 --> 00:57:13,102
Let me remind you,
it was my generation
1038
00:57:13,144 --> 00:57:15,938
that produced Jacqueline Kennedy,
Terence Rattigan,
1039
00:57:16,064 --> 00:57:18,316
and Agatha Christie.
1040
00:57:18,399 --> 00:57:20,985
I'm sorry if I said anything
to upset you, Mrs Mason.
1041
00:57:21,027 --> 00:57:23,571
Words! When have I ever
been afraid of words?
1042
00:57:23,613 --> 00:57:25,990
I'm sure that everything
you've said is right.
1043
00:57:26,032 --> 00:57:28,785
It's just me that
doesn't think so.
1044
00:57:29,202 --> 00:57:31,329
Jo, get your coat.
We'll take Arthur to the pub.
1045
00:57:31,371 --> 00:57:32,872
I'm sure Mother will excuse us.
1046
00:57:32,914 --> 00:57:34,665
Darling boy,
I hope you'll always do
1047
00:57:34,707 --> 00:57:36,667
exactly what you think is right,
1048
00:57:36,751 --> 00:57:38,920
after first having
talked it over with me.
1049
00:57:39,379 --> 00:57:41,047
Listen, I must get
my face together.
1050
00:57:41,130 --> 00:57:44,050
No, leave it. It's perfect.
Isn't it, Mother?
1051
00:57:44,300 --> 00:57:48,513
Miss Delaney's looks
are her problem, not mine.
1052
00:57:48,596 --> 00:57:51,015
George, we'll get the lunch.
1053
00:57:51,057 --> 00:57:53,393
- Lunch?
- May I help?
1054
00:57:53,434 --> 00:57:55,353
Thank you.
The kitchen's so small...
1055
00:57:55,478 --> 00:57:56,813
We're going to meet Arthur.
1056
00:57:56,854 --> 00:57:58,694
Now, do you want us back
here for lunch or not?
1057
00:57:58,731 --> 00:58:01,234
Just as you wish, dear,
although it's six months
1058
00:58:01,317 --> 00:58:02,360
since we've glimpsed you.
1059
00:58:02,485 --> 00:58:04,529
Then we'll be back here
at one o'clock. All right?
1060
00:58:04,612 --> 00:58:05,822
Bye.
1061
00:58:09,200 --> 00:58:11,786
- She seems...
- Well?
1062
00:58:11,953 --> 00:58:14,038
She has plenty of ideas.
1063
00:58:14,122 --> 00:58:16,457
You might as well say a
shopping list has ideas.
1064
00:58:16,541 --> 00:58:19,210
If that's an example of
what your schools are turning out,
1065
00:58:19,252 --> 00:58:21,170
I'd like to see you in another job.
1066
00:58:21,212 --> 00:58:23,548
Well, you can't expect
everyone to agree with us.
1067
00:58:23,673 --> 00:58:25,967
Least of all when they're
half our age.
1068
00:58:26,008 --> 00:58:27,218
My age.
1069
00:58:27,301 --> 00:58:29,303
Why not? It's a democracy.
1070
00:58:29,470 --> 00:58:31,889
They ought to toe the line.
1071
00:58:32,014 --> 00:58:33,599
Shall I make the beds?
1072
00:58:33,683 --> 00:58:35,059
When did you ever make the beds?
1073
00:58:35,101 --> 00:58:36,310
Mmm?
1074
00:58:36,477 --> 00:58:38,479
They've been done for
at least an hour.
1075
00:58:38,521 --> 00:58:41,649
- Oh, well, I thought it might just...
- These plants are taking over.
1076
00:58:41,691 --> 00:58:44,318
I think it's going to be
either them or us.
1077
00:58:44,444 --> 00:58:46,320
How keen do you think he is?
1078
00:58:46,446 --> 00:58:49,782
I don't think he knows
what he's saying or doing.
1079
00:58:49,907 --> 00:58:51,033
Well, you've got to remember
1080
00:58:51,075 --> 00:58:54,036
that we're 2,000 miles
further south this weekend.
1081
00:58:54,162 --> 00:58:56,914
It must seem just like
home to Miss Delaney.
1082
00:58:56,956 --> 00:58:58,332
Oh...
1083
00:58:58,666 --> 00:59:00,334
Why don't you call her Jo?
1084
00:59:00,501 --> 00:59:02,753
I hate the name. It's...
1085
00:59:02,795 --> 00:59:04,172
so short.
1086
00:59:04,297 --> 00:59:05,465
Don't you think it odd
1087
00:59:05,506 --> 00:59:08,009
that when you couldn't
keep a dry stitch on your back,
1088
00:59:08,134 --> 00:59:09,760
she had nothing to wash?
1089
00:59:09,802 --> 00:59:11,637
Or is that peculiar
to hot countries?
1090
00:59:11,679 --> 00:59:12,972
What do you make of that?
1091
00:59:13,014 --> 00:59:15,641
At the risk of failing you completely,
I make nothing of it.
1092
00:59:15,683 --> 00:59:17,560
Don't be so coy.
1093
00:59:17,602 --> 00:59:20,229
I don't think she wears
any female clothing at all,
1094
00:59:20,354 --> 00:59:21,898
and for excellent reasons.
1095
00:59:22,023 --> 00:59:25,276
Lettice, this is a conversation
best left to another time.
1096
00:59:25,443 --> 00:59:28,779
George, this is the worst thing I've
ever had to say about a coloured lady,
1097
00:59:28,863 --> 00:59:31,991
but I think she may
not be a female.
1098
00:59:32,200 --> 00:59:34,535
Lettice, I've never
heard you so uncharitable.
1099
00:59:34,619 --> 00:59:37,181
- What did you do with the butter?
- Oh, bugger the butter.
1100
00:59:37,205 --> 00:59:40,124
Laurie says she's a woman,
she says she's a woman.
1101
00:59:40,166 --> 00:59:43,628
With such evidence, I am prepared
to take her femininity on trust.
1102
00:59:43,711 --> 00:59:45,421
Laurie's still sick.
1103
00:59:45,546 --> 00:59:47,149
The only thing
he's sick with is love.
1104
00:59:47,173 --> 00:59:49,093
Well, all the more reason
to find out what she is
1105
00:59:49,133 --> 00:59:51,511
before it gets out of hand.
1106
00:59:51,636 --> 00:59:52,845
Do something!
1107
00:59:52,929 --> 00:59:54,764
What, debag her?
1108
00:59:55,348 --> 00:59:56,724
Telephone her parents.
1109
00:59:56,849 --> 00:59:58,601
What on earth for?
1110
00:59:58,684 --> 01:00:00,436
We don't know them.
1111
01:00:01,103 --> 01:00:03,523
Well, they must know if
they have a daughter or not.
1112
01:00:03,564 --> 01:00:05,316
It's not just something
a mother feels.
1113
01:00:05,441 --> 01:00:06,817
No, no, never.
I won't do it.
1114
01:00:06,943 --> 01:00:08,545
It's obscene.
Come away from that telephone.
1115
01:00:08,569 --> 01:00:10,780
He is your only son.
1116
01:00:10,905 --> 01:00:12,907
Listen, they're only just
across the road.
1117
01:00:13,032 --> 01:00:16,160
How do you ask someone if
their daughter is a girl? Hmm?
1118
01:00:17,119 --> 01:00:19,413
And a complete stranger at that.
1119
01:00:19,580 --> 01:00:21,499
We don't know where
the parents live.
1120
01:00:21,624 --> 01:00:23,209
There's a label
on her luggage.
1121
01:00:23,334 --> 01:00:24,752
My God, how does
your brain work?
1122
01:00:24,877 --> 01:00:26,003
Quite efficiently.
1123
01:00:26,087 --> 01:00:28,464
13A Belgrave Square, SW1.
1124
01:00:28,548 --> 01:00:30,341
You'll get the number from Enquiries.
1125
01:00:30,383 --> 01:00:32,343
No. I won't. I'd choke.
1126
01:00:32,385 --> 01:00:35,054
Do you want your son
to end up a...
1127
01:00:35,096 --> 01:00:36,639
I'm not sure that
I know the word.
1128
01:00:36,681 --> 01:00:39,267
Yes, if it's going to bring
a little peace into this house.
1129
01:00:39,392 --> 01:00:42,478
George, you are impossible.
1130
01:00:43,145 --> 01:00:45,565
The Delaneys will be
too busy with state affairs,
1131
01:00:45,606 --> 01:00:48,901
You know, passports,
legal immigration, that sort of thing.
1132
01:00:49,026 --> 01:00:51,004
Sooner or later, you have to
take somebody at their word.
1133
01:00:51,028 --> 01:00:52,863
And I think she's a girl.
There.
1134
01:00:52,989 --> 01:00:55,491
She's flatter-chested than you.
1135
01:00:55,700 --> 01:00:58,786
Well, won't make any difference.
We neither of us want to be Miss World.
1136
01:00:58,828 --> 01:01:01,414
At least get the
number from Enquiries.
1137
01:01:01,497 --> 01:01:05,585
Now, it doesn't hurt to
telephone Enquiries, does it?
1138
01:01:06,085 --> 01:01:08,504
What moral right have
we got to be doing this?
1139
01:01:08,629 --> 01:01:11,966
It's not a sin to
call the operator.
1140
01:01:12,133 --> 01:01:15,052
Lettice, if Laurie has any
passionate feelings at all,
1141
01:01:15,177 --> 01:01:17,722
he'll know the form by now.
1142
01:01:17,847 --> 01:01:20,433
My son is a virgin.
1143
01:01:22,935 --> 01:01:25,521
What does one
dial for Enquiries?
1144
01:01:26,564 --> 01:01:30,693
At least if I'm wrong, we
get to know the parents sooner.
1145
01:01:31,068 --> 01:01:33,112
I'm sure anyone living
in Belgravia
1146
01:01:33,237 --> 01:01:36,073
is prepared to give
a straight answer.
1147
01:01:36,198 --> 01:01:39,076
I'll spend the rest of
my life regretting this.
1148
01:01:39,952 --> 01:01:42,413
Oh, hello. Er...
It's the operator.
1149
01:01:43,998 --> 01:01:46,751
I... Oh, good morning.
1150
01:01:46,792 --> 01:01:50,504
- What's it like your end? Nice?
- Stop waffling, George.
1151
01:01:51,172 --> 01:01:52,882
I want a number.
1152
01:01:52,923 --> 01:01:55,676
Oh, a little West End number.
1153
01:01:55,760 --> 01:01:57,928
No, a telephone number.
1154
01:01:58,638 --> 01:02:00,181
Name? Mason.
1155
01:02:00,264 --> 01:02:02,808
Not our name! Delaney.
1156
01:02:03,184 --> 01:02:05,227
He wants Delaney.
1157
01:02:05,311 --> 01:02:07,730
I can't do it. It goes against
everything I believe.
1158
01:02:07,813 --> 01:02:11,233
Pacifist!
No, no, not you, Operator.
1159
01:02:11,359 --> 01:02:13,527
Thank you. Delaney.
1160
01:02:13,653 --> 01:02:16,781
No, I don't know the initial.
We're not that close.
1161
01:02:16,906 --> 01:02:20,743
Delaney, 13A...
1162
01:02:21,118 --> 01:02:23,329
Belgrave Square, SW1.
1163
01:02:23,371 --> 01:02:26,123
And please be quick, because
they could be back any minute.
1164
01:02:26,248 --> 01:02:29,210
I would never have thought
anyone mentioned in dispatches
1165
01:02:29,335 --> 01:02:31,462
could be such a coward.
1166
01:02:31,587 --> 01:02:32,880
- Oh, my God.
- Hmm?
1167
01:02:32,922 --> 01:02:35,466
Get...
Get me a pencil with a point.
1168
01:02:35,591 --> 01:02:39,261
There's one in the hall.
On... On the table.
1169
01:02:39,387 --> 01:02:42,973
Op... Operator!
Oh, that was very quick.
1170
01:02:43,224 --> 01:02:44,725
On the table!
1171
01:02:44,767 --> 01:02:46,852
I'm afraid you'll have
to hang on a minute.
1172
01:02:46,894 --> 01:02:50,856
The pencil with the point is...
is in the hall, on the table.
1173
01:02:51,273 --> 01:02:52,733
Really?
1174
01:02:52,775 --> 01:02:56,320
0-1-2-3-5-double 9-8-3.
1175
01:02:56,445 --> 01:02:58,781
Surely you can hang
on for a minute?
1176
01:02:59,365 --> 01:03:01,158
It's what you're paid for.
1177
01:03:01,283 --> 01:03:03,512
- Nothing here!
- Well, then, on the desk.
1178
01:03:03,536 --> 01:03:06,580
No, stop misunderstanding me,
you silly man.
1179
01:03:06,706 --> 01:03:08,541
Damn it!
1180
01:03:09,500 --> 01:03:12,670
0-1-2... 2...
1181
01:03:12,795 --> 01:03:15,256
2-3-5-double 9-8-3.
1182
01:03:15,381 --> 01:03:18,050
2-3-5-double 9-8-3.
1183
01:03:18,134 --> 01:03:19,719
At least try that.
1184
01:03:19,844 --> 01:03:22,888
Someone in Belgravia
might know what sex she is.
1185
01:03:29,019 --> 01:03:30,229
No, I...
1186
01:03:30,271 --> 01:03:32,481
I think this would
come better from you, love.
1187
01:03:32,606 --> 01:03:34,233
Be a man.
1188
01:03:37,695 --> 01:03:39,697
I... no, I...
1189
01:03:40,364 --> 01:03:42,783
Very well, George Mason.
1190
01:03:43,284 --> 01:03:45,745
Where are you going?
I don't trust that "inspired" look.
1191
01:03:45,870 --> 01:03:47,246
I'm going to search her luggage
1192
01:03:47,288 --> 01:03:49,790
to find out what her
underclothing is like.
1193
01:03:49,915 --> 01:03:52,042
You can't rifle
a guest's belongings!
1194
01:03:52,126 --> 01:03:53,919
You always underestimated me.
1195
01:03:54,044 --> 01:03:56,714
All right, all right, all right.
I'm dialling.
1196
01:03:57,798 --> 01:04:01,260
But let it be understood that
you don't touch a thing of hers.
1197
01:04:03,596 --> 01:04:05,389
Oh, my God, it's ringing.
1198
01:04:05,890 --> 01:04:09,727
Well, don't watch me.
Can't you go and find anything to do?
1199
01:04:10,186 --> 01:04:12,021
Oh, hello. Mr Delaney?
1200
01:04:12,229 --> 01:04:13,272
Yes, it is.
1201
01:04:13,397 --> 01:04:15,399
It's the right number.
1202
01:04:15,524 --> 01:04:17,902
- Why did you ring off?
- Well, it's such a shock.
1203
01:04:17,943 --> 01:04:20,112
He's a High Commissioner.
1204
01:04:20,237 --> 01:04:22,907
He's one of our
coloured brothers.
1205
01:04:23,491 --> 01:04:26,494
You'd be hopeless in a nuclear war.
1206
01:04:26,577 --> 01:04:29,413
You'd sit and watch
the Russians rape me,
1207
01:04:29,455 --> 01:04:34,460
and then make us all
a nice cup of tea with sugar in it.
1208
01:04:35,044 --> 01:04:37,254
- Ah, would you like a cup?
- No.
1209
01:04:37,379 --> 01:04:40,966
Oh, Mr Delaney, that is you?
1210
01:04:41,133 --> 01:04:42,133
Yes, it is.
1211
01:04:42,218 --> 01:04:45,387
That was my husband
who telephoned a few minutes ago.
1212
01:04:45,429 --> 01:04:47,681
I'm so sorry you were cut off.
1213
01:04:47,848 --> 01:04:51,435
Can you spare a moment?
He'd like to talk to you.
1214
01:04:51,477 --> 01:04:52,978
Ask him.
1215
01:04:53,604 --> 01:04:55,105
Take it!
1216
01:04:55,606 --> 01:04:57,399
Darling, we have the right
1217
01:04:57,441 --> 01:04:59,944
to know what's going on
under our own rooves
1218
01:05:00,027 --> 01:05:02,822
on account of
the mortgage repayments alone.
1219
01:05:03,072 --> 01:05:05,199
S-s-say something.
1220
01:05:05,407 --> 01:05:06,575
I think he's gone.
1221
01:05:06,617 --> 01:05:08,285
- Hello?
- No!
1222
01:05:08,327 --> 01:05:11,705
Oh, Mr Delaney, um...
can I help you?
1223
01:05:12,081 --> 01:05:14,333
Tell him who you are first.
1224
01:05:14,959 --> 01:05:16,836
I don't know anymore.
1225
01:05:17,336 --> 01:05:20,756
Do you, by any chance, live at
13A Belgrave Square, London SW1?
1226
01:05:21,006 --> 01:05:23,300
- Yes, I do.
- Oh, you do?
1227
01:05:23,425 --> 01:05:24,718
He does.
1228
01:05:24,844 --> 01:05:28,973
It's me again.
Mr and Mrs Mason calling,
1229
01:05:29,098 --> 01:05:30,599
Mr and Mrs Lettice Mason.
1230
01:05:30,766 --> 01:05:32,977
I see you probably don't know...
1231
01:05:33,102 --> 01:05:35,563
What? You do know?
1232
01:05:35,688 --> 01:05:38,566
I'm not that widely
read in the West Indies.
1233
01:05:38,691 --> 01:05:41,277
Well, that makes it
much more friendly.
1234
01:05:41,402 --> 01:05:43,046
I told you it'd be all right.
Now, ring off.
1235
01:05:43,070 --> 01:05:47,575
I thought perhaps you might
not have heard of us from Jo.
1236
01:05:48,075 --> 01:05:50,703
There, ask him.
1237
01:05:51,704 --> 01:05:54,290
Mr Delaney, um...
is your wife there?
1238
01:05:54,415 --> 01:05:55,332
Yes, hold on.
1239
01:05:55,416 --> 01:05:57,018
No, no, no.
I don't much want to talk to her.
1240
01:05:57,042 --> 01:05:59,461
I just hoped that she
might be out shopping.
1241
01:05:59,920 --> 01:06:02,023
Oh, she's just going?
Oh, well, I don't want to keep you.
1242
01:06:02,047 --> 01:06:03,650
I know what it's like
on Saturdays. Goodbye.
1243
01:06:03,674 --> 01:06:05,384
Ask if he has a daughter.
1244
01:06:05,551 --> 01:06:08,387
Get away! She'll hear you!
1245
01:06:11,140 --> 01:06:12,725
How is Jo?
1246
01:06:14,602 --> 01:06:16,937
Staying with us,
as a matter of fact.
1247
01:06:17,062 --> 01:06:20,316
Say "she", and see
what he says to that.
1248
01:06:20,441 --> 01:06:22,067
Jo's very well.
1249
01:06:22,234 --> 01:06:23,694
We're very pleased
to have met Jo.
1250
01:06:23,736 --> 01:06:27,406
She! Her! I mean...
Ooh, you are impossible.
1251
01:06:28,032 --> 01:06:30,409
No, sir, my wife.
You know how women hover.
1252
01:06:30,451 --> 01:06:32,661
No, no, no,
don't put Mrs Delaney on.
1253
01:06:32,828 --> 01:06:34,747
No, not if she's waiting
to go out shopping.
1254
01:06:34,997 --> 01:06:38,626
But all you have to say is,
"Jo is a very nice girl."
1255
01:06:38,751 --> 01:06:41,295
I thought anyone
could have said that.
1256
01:06:41,462 --> 01:06:45,049
Mrs Delaney, is it
snowing this morning?
1257
01:06:45,090 --> 01:06:46,467
Oh? That's very rough on you,
1258
01:06:46,592 --> 01:06:48,844
but I daresay you're
getting acclimatised.
1259
01:06:48,969 --> 01:06:49,969
Yes.
1260
01:06:50,012 --> 01:06:53,265
Yes, we like Jo
very much indeed.
1261
01:06:53,390 --> 01:06:55,030
And it's probably
going to snow here, too.
1262
01:06:55,142 --> 01:06:58,938
Ask her!
I'm tearing my hair out!
1263
01:06:59,313 --> 01:07:02,900
Mrs Delaney, just before
you go out into the cold,
1264
01:07:03,025 --> 01:07:05,277
do you... have...
1265
01:07:05,361 --> 01:07:07,780
Do you know if you
have a daughter?
1266
01:07:08,906 --> 01:07:10,699
It's him.
It's him again, now.
1267
01:07:13,243 --> 01:07:15,871
Your wife sounded really nice.
1268
01:07:16,956 --> 01:07:19,833
No, no, old chap, no.
Don't worry about the expense.
1269
01:07:19,917 --> 01:07:22,878
This sort of thing
doesn't happen every day.
1270
01:07:23,003 --> 01:07:24,505
Yes. Yes.
1271
01:07:24,672 --> 01:07:28,717
We like the young people, yes.
Very much. And...
1272
01:07:29,885 --> 01:07:33,222
And we want you to know,
from the bottom of our hearts,
1273
01:07:33,347 --> 01:07:35,224
that we like your...
1274
01:07:35,599 --> 01:07:37,142
daughter...
1275
01:07:37,267 --> 01:07:38,811
immensely.
1276
01:07:42,231 --> 01:07:44,525
- W hat?
- W hat?
1277
01:07:47,361 --> 01:07:50,948
He's looking forward, very much,
to meeting our daughter, Laurie.
1278
01:07:51,657 --> 01:07:52,825
George...
1279
01:08:07,840 --> 01:08:09,591
George!
1280
01:08:09,675 --> 01:08:11,176
George!
1281
01:08:13,721 --> 01:08:15,639
Come here!
1282
01:08:20,644 --> 01:08:22,271
Lettice, I do not approve.
1283
01:08:22,312 --> 01:08:25,190
- A guest is a guest.
- Is a guest. Open this case.
1284
01:08:25,482 --> 01:08:28,777
There are certain
feminine traits in every man.
1285
01:08:28,819 --> 01:08:30,571
I have beautiful feet,
1286
01:08:30,612 --> 01:08:32,173
but that doesn't give
every perfect stranger
1287
01:08:32,197 --> 01:08:34,074
a right to rifle my belongings.
1288
01:08:34,116 --> 01:08:36,702
Well, if this happened in school,
you wouldn't keep quiet.
1289
01:08:36,785 --> 01:08:38,345
Schools aren't the places
to keep quiet,
1290
01:08:38,370 --> 01:08:40,706
but I'd rather hoped my home was.
1291
01:08:41,081 --> 01:08:43,560
Lettice, there are certain things
that can't be said between gentlemen,
1292
01:08:43,584 --> 01:08:45,919
and telling Laurie that he's...
1293
01:08:45,961 --> 01:08:48,922
mistaken about the sex
of his girlfriend is one of them.
1294
01:08:49,006 --> 01:08:51,383
Open the case.
1295
01:08:51,967 --> 01:08:55,137
You... You can't be content
to have your career ruined
1296
01:08:55,179 --> 01:08:57,139
by letting him continue
in a relationship
1297
01:08:57,181 --> 01:09:00,017
that is as godless
as it is fashionable.
1298
01:09:00,059 --> 01:09:02,478
Jo is, I believe,
a young woman.
1299
01:09:02,519 --> 01:09:06,148
Charming, attractive,
of advanced ideas,
1300
01:09:06,190 --> 01:09:09,276
which, I fancy,
for better or worse,
1301
01:09:09,318 --> 01:09:10,903
she puts into effect.
1302
01:09:10,944 --> 01:09:12,863
If she's your criterion
of womanhood,
1303
01:09:12,905 --> 01:09:14,823
by God, I've failed you.
1304
01:09:15,491 --> 01:09:17,367
Laurie's gone barking mad.
1305
01:09:17,409 --> 01:09:19,995
I mean, he's...
He's lost touch with reality.
1306
01:09:20,412 --> 01:09:21,622
The case!
1307
01:09:21,663 --> 01:09:23,749
My dear, if you
respect me as a man...
1308
01:09:23,791 --> 01:09:25,918
Open the case.
If you won't, I will.
1309
01:09:26,001 --> 01:09:27,878
- You can't!
- Can't I?
1310
01:09:30,089 --> 01:09:32,091
Oh...
1311
01:09:42,601 --> 01:09:44,728
- Read that.
- Mmm?
1312
01:09:46,563 --> 01:09:48,565
All of it? It's a Bible.
1313
01:09:50,109 --> 01:09:52,945
"To Joseph, my beloved son."
1314
01:09:52,986 --> 01:09:55,072
In black and white.
1315
01:09:55,280 --> 01:09:57,074
Wait till he gets home.
1316
01:09:58,700 --> 01:10:02,204
Lettice, I'm a...
1317
01:10:02,246 --> 01:10:04,164
a liberal coward,
1318
01:10:04,206 --> 01:10:06,333
but everyone has a right
to live his own life,
1319
01:10:06,375 --> 01:10:08,001
make his own decisions.
1320
01:10:08,043 --> 01:10:09,878
It's a right that I will
defend for my son,
1321
01:10:09,920 --> 01:10:13,507
even against my wife. You...
You can't live his life for him.
1322
01:10:13,674 --> 01:10:16,051
I don't want to.
I'm far too busy.
1323
01:10:16,468 --> 01:10:19,388
If he is nightly
in the arms of a young man,
1324
01:10:20,347 --> 01:10:22,933
which, pray God, he isn't,
1325
01:10:23,267 --> 01:10:24,518
does it matter?
1326
01:10:24,977 --> 01:10:28,522
You'd have to resign
from the golf club, for a start.
1327
01:10:28,564 --> 01:10:31,108
Lettice, he's out of
the nursery. He's a man.
1328
01:10:31,233 --> 01:10:34,987
Whatever my son's taste in sex,
I'm not ashamed of him.
1329
01:10:35,445 --> 01:10:37,906
If Jo is a man...
1330
01:10:39,616 --> 01:10:42,202
I don't think I'm disgusted.
1331
01:10:42,661 --> 01:10:45,622
If they have a...
a taste for one another,
1332
01:10:46,248 --> 01:10:48,959
it adds to their life, then...
1333
01:10:49,376 --> 01:10:52,129
as far as I'm concerned,
they can be as loving as they like.
1334
01:10:52,171 --> 01:10:54,214
We're none of us so normal,
so self-dependent,
1335
01:10:54,256 --> 01:10:57,176
that we can turn down all the
good sex that comes our way,
1336
01:10:57,551 --> 01:11:00,888
or the chance of having someone
to love us. Don't you agree?
1337
01:11:00,971 --> 01:11:02,431
I don't give a damn
if she's a man.
1338
01:11:02,472 --> 01:11:04,474
If she is, she's
a jolly good chap.
1339
01:11:05,184 --> 01:11:06,226
Going to lunch?
1340
01:11:06,268 --> 01:11:08,770
At the nearest hotel
that will have me.
1341
01:11:08,854 --> 01:11:11,440
But you're not leaving me now.
You can't possibly leave me now.
1342
01:11:11,481 --> 01:11:13,984
Say I'll be back
when they've gone.
1343
01:11:15,319 --> 01:11:17,505
- Pretend we're making the bed.
- But it's made.
1344
01:11:17,529 --> 01:11:19,531
Well, then, unmake it.
1345
01:11:21,200 --> 01:11:23,785
- Just making the bed.
- Again.
1346
01:11:23,869 --> 01:11:25,329
Dad, what on earth
are you doing?
1347
01:11:25,370 --> 01:11:26,997
You never made
a bed in your life.
1348
01:11:27,039 --> 01:11:28,123
Yeah, well, I...
1349
01:11:28,165 --> 01:11:31,335
Your father is fighting
for decency and sanity.
1350
01:11:31,376 --> 01:11:33,879
What future is there in that?
1351
01:11:33,921 --> 01:11:36,840
Your father would like
a quiet word with you.
1352
01:11:36,882 --> 01:11:38,300
- Oh.
- But if you're busy,
1353
01:11:38,342 --> 01:11:40,093
it'll keep till after lunch.
1354
01:11:40,135 --> 01:11:43,680
Jo, be an angel, will you,
and get me my spectacles?
1355
01:11:43,722 --> 01:11:46,558
They're by the telephone.
I can see them quite clearly.
1356
01:11:46,600 --> 01:11:47,809
But you're wearing them.
1357
01:11:47,851 --> 01:11:49,519
Oh! How quick.
1358
01:11:49,561 --> 01:11:52,397
I can hardly see a thing
because of the steam.
1359
01:11:52,439 --> 01:11:53,899
Could you get me my case?
1360
01:11:53,941 --> 01:11:56,443
They're next door, in my bedroom.
1361
01:11:56,485 --> 01:11:58,111
That's it, isn't it?
1362
01:11:58,153 --> 01:12:01,031
I mean, look,
it's got your name on it. See?
1363
01:12:03,367 --> 01:12:04,910
Shall I bring you your bag?
1364
01:12:04,952 --> 01:12:06,203
You can put the whole lot in.
1365
01:12:06,245 --> 01:12:07,746
Now, I think that is downstairs.
1366
01:12:07,788 --> 01:12:08,956
Thank you.
1367
01:12:08,997 --> 01:12:10,540
Or shall I do some washing?
1368
01:12:10,582 --> 01:12:12,167
It'll take about
half an hour or so.
1369
01:12:12,209 --> 01:12:14,044
Or perhaps I could take longer?
1370
01:12:14,086 --> 01:12:15,545
Jo, I want you with me.
1371
01:12:15,587 --> 01:12:17,941
Oh, no, no. Listen, I don't want to
get involved with all this now.
1372
01:12:17,965 --> 01:12:19,108
- Please.
- Anything that I've got to say
1373
01:12:19,132 --> 01:12:22,719
can be said in front of Jo.
Er... now...
1374
01:12:22,928 --> 01:12:26,598
Sex is a...
a very wonderful thing.
1375
01:12:27,015 --> 01:12:30,686
Um... What did you say?
1376
01:12:30,769 --> 01:12:33,897
I'm sorry. That's awful of me.
1377
01:12:33,939 --> 01:12:35,333
Do you know that is
the second time that word
1378
01:12:35,357 --> 01:12:37,567
has been used in this house?
1379
01:12:37,609 --> 01:12:41,029
Your father said
that sex was wonderful.
1380
01:12:42,114 --> 01:12:45,117
Well, I...
in its way, it is wonderful.
1381
01:12:45,158 --> 01:12:49,121
Not always necessary,
but always wonderful.
1382
01:12:49,830 --> 01:12:52,040
Sex?
1383
01:12:52,624 --> 01:12:54,167
Mr Mason, why now?
1384
01:12:54,876 --> 01:12:57,546
Well, you must just take
my word for it. Wonderful and...
1385
01:12:58,213 --> 01:12:59,673
and mysterious.
1386
01:13:00,340 --> 01:13:02,134
I don't think it's in
anyone's interest
1387
01:13:02,175 --> 01:13:03,385
to stress "mysterious".
1388
01:13:03,552 --> 01:13:05,196
You mean one doesn't
know where to find it,
1389
01:13:05,220 --> 01:13:06,930
or how to get enough?
1390
01:13:06,972 --> 01:13:08,682
If you're going
to be flippant, I'll...
1391
01:13:08,724 --> 01:13:10,618
insist on turning the whole
thing over to your mother.
1392
01:13:10,642 --> 01:13:13,103
Dad, is this what is called
"a man-to-man talk"?
1393
01:13:13,395 --> 01:13:15,522
- Almost entirely.
- No, no, no, no.
1394
01:13:15,564 --> 01:13:17,441
It's not a talk, Laurie.
It's just a...
1395
01:13:17,983 --> 01:13:19,234
chat
1396
01:13:20,360 --> 01:13:22,529
Mr Mason, is this
something to do with me?
1397
01:13:22,571 --> 01:13:25,991
Oh, no, please don't be embarrassed.
I've heard it all before.
1398
01:13:26,825 --> 01:13:28,618
No, no, no. You...
1399
01:13:28,660 --> 01:13:30,329
You couldn't be
farther from the point.
1400
01:13:30,370 --> 01:13:33,123
No, to be strictly accurate...
1401
01:13:34,041 --> 01:13:36,209
George means
it does concern you, my dear.
1402
01:13:36,251 --> 01:13:38,170
Actually, we love you very much,
1403
01:13:38,211 --> 01:13:40,047
but we don't want to
see you hurt.
1404
01:13:40,172 --> 01:13:42,424
Not on your first visit.
1405
01:13:42,466 --> 01:13:44,843
- I see.
- Well, I don't.
1406
01:13:44,885 --> 01:13:47,429
But with "sex" and "mystery"
so far established,
1407
01:13:47,471 --> 01:13:48,597
my interest is held.
1408
01:13:48,764 --> 01:13:50,074
Well, it's something
that your mother thinks
1409
01:13:50,098 --> 01:13:51,492
that I think you...
you ought to know,
1410
01:13:51,516 --> 01:13:55,437
and she thinks now is the time
that you ought to know it now. Er...
1411
01:13:55,771 --> 01:13:57,356
Mother, how have
you got him going?
1412
01:13:57,397 --> 01:13:59,024
He never talked so
lucidly in his life.
1413
01:13:59,316 --> 01:14:01,610
Your father says what he feels.
1414
01:14:02,152 --> 01:14:03,528
Must you, Mr Mason?
1415
01:14:04,780 --> 01:14:07,949
I think I've said
all I need to say on...
1416
01:14:07,991 --> 01:14:09,451
Don't be preposterous!
1417
01:14:09,493 --> 01:14:10,994
I haven't understood a word.
1418
01:14:11,036 --> 01:14:13,622
I want this ended before lunch.
1419
01:14:13,830 --> 01:14:16,917
Your father, if I can guess
what he wants to say,
1420
01:14:16,958 --> 01:14:20,003
means that sex is only marvellous
1421
01:14:20,045 --> 01:14:22,005
with the right people.
1422
01:14:22,089 --> 01:14:25,300
I realise this is a
very big idea, darling,
1423
01:14:25,342 --> 01:14:28,762
but will you promise me
to think about it?
1424
01:14:28,804 --> 01:14:30,806
I think of nothing else, Mother.
1425
01:14:30,847 --> 01:14:33,683
Who are the right people,
Mrs Mason? Do you have a list?
1426
01:14:33,767 --> 01:14:36,937
It's... It's a question of
what's, er... appropriate.
1427
01:14:36,978 --> 01:14:39,773
To finding the piece that fits.
1428
01:14:41,274 --> 01:14:43,527
You don't have to
take our word for it.
1429
01:14:43,568 --> 01:14:47,072
God has expressed himself on the
subject in no uncertain terms.
1430
01:14:47,155 --> 01:14:48,448
Now, where was I?
1431
01:14:48,490 --> 01:14:50,367
Having sex with the right people.
1432
01:14:50,409 --> 01:14:53,537
You know, I used to wonder
how you spent your lunch hour.
1433
01:14:53,578 --> 01:14:55,288
If you think for
one minute I'm going to
1434
01:14:55,330 --> 01:14:57,707
marry some rich
Pre-Raphaelite, like Liz,
1435
01:14:57,749 --> 01:14:59,251
than you can forget it.
1436
01:14:59,292 --> 01:15:01,837
Liz would have died for him.
1437
01:15:01,878 --> 01:15:03,981
- You didn't tell me about her.
- There's nothing to tell.
1438
01:15:04,005 --> 01:15:06,425
She's a very nice girl, but
because she's unusually plain,
1439
01:15:06,508 --> 01:15:08,135
she'll probably stay one.
1440
01:15:08,218 --> 01:15:09,928
Your father wishes me to say
1441
01:15:09,970 --> 01:15:14,015
that he's troubled by certain things
that you don't seem to be aware of.
1442
01:15:14,057 --> 01:15:16,977
Then if he could just draw, mime,
suggest, act any of them,
1443
01:15:17,018 --> 01:15:18,270
we could all have lunch.
1444
01:15:18,311 --> 01:15:20,939
When it comes to a
question of the utmost tact,
1445
01:15:20,981 --> 01:15:22,732
your father is inhibited.
1446
01:15:22,816 --> 01:15:25,235
Fortunately, being an artist
and not an academic,
1447
01:15:25,277 --> 01:15:26,987
I'm spared these scruples.
1448
01:15:27,028 --> 01:15:29,489
Your father wishes
me to make it clear,
1449
01:15:29,531 --> 01:15:31,199
as all my books made clear,
1450
01:15:31,241 --> 01:15:34,953
that life is best
with a person of...
1451
01:15:35,120 --> 01:15:36,746
the opposite sex.
1452
01:15:37,330 --> 01:15:39,541
- Who?
- Opposite sex.
1453
01:15:41,585 --> 01:15:43,837
Is this what you
wanted to tell me?
1454
01:15:43,879 --> 01:15:45,672
More or less to the word, yes.
1455
01:15:46,089 --> 01:15:49,050
Well, there's at least six couples
in my block of flats that don't agree.
1456
01:15:49,092 --> 01:15:51,178
Oh, for Christ's sake,
why tell me this?
1457
01:15:51,219 --> 01:15:53,513
Is it some kind of confession?
1458
01:15:53,555 --> 01:15:56,725
Have you been feeling up the
first year behind the gym?
1459
01:15:59,102 --> 01:16:03,148
My boy, the best,
the fullest relationship
1460
01:16:03,190 --> 01:16:05,567
is that in which one discovers
not a reflection of oneself,
1461
01:16:05,609 --> 01:16:12,949
but the soul, the psychology
to complement one's own.
1462
01:16:13,533 --> 01:16:15,160
Thank you, dear.
1463
01:16:15,243 --> 01:16:17,829
No-one denies that other...
1464
01:16:17,871 --> 01:16:21,416
varieties of sex
1465
01:16:22,334 --> 01:16:26,004
are exciting, or distracting, but...
1466
01:16:26,379 --> 01:16:28,340
But... But the only relationship which...
1467
01:16:28,381 --> 01:16:32,761
which... which yields the...
the real, the fullest lasting pleasure,
1468
01:16:32,802 --> 01:16:35,514
is the... what we call
the homosexual relationship.
1469
01:16:35,555 --> 01:16:36,723
What?!
1470
01:16:36,848 --> 01:16:38,642
Ah, heterosexual. Er...
1471
01:16:41,811 --> 01:16:43,730
We can pause for a moment
1472
01:16:43,772 --> 01:16:46,566
for you to grasp
the implications of that.
1473
01:16:46,650 --> 01:16:47,817
Only a moment, please,
1474
01:16:47,859 --> 01:16:50,278
because I'd love to get
into something dry for lunch.
1475
01:16:50,320 --> 01:16:52,697
We want to know what
you mean to do about it.
1476
01:16:52,864 --> 01:16:54,449
What can I do about what?
1477
01:16:54,658 --> 01:16:57,577
We feel as if you need help, or...
1478
01:16:57,619 --> 01:16:59,120
That's where we come in.
1479
01:16:59,162 --> 01:17:01,790
Mother, one of us needs help.
1480
01:17:02,082 --> 01:17:04,334
May I point out
that it is not me.
1481
01:17:04,543 --> 01:17:06,211
Frankly, no.
1482
01:17:07,504 --> 01:17:08,880
I am in love.
1483
01:17:08,922 --> 01:17:10,173
We're in love, Mrs Mason.
1484
01:17:10,382 --> 01:17:12,217
The quality of the emotion
1485
01:17:12,259 --> 01:17:14,010
doesn't make it any less unusual.
1486
01:17:14,094 --> 01:17:16,429
Mrs Mason, I'll make
one thing clear now.
1487
01:17:16,471 --> 01:17:18,974
I did not come hereto
be patronised by you.
1488
01:17:24,479 --> 01:17:26,439
Then how do you explain this?
1489
01:17:26,481 --> 01:17:28,149
What's that doing here?
1490
01:17:28,191 --> 01:17:30,193
Is that all you have to say?
1491
01:17:30,235 --> 01:17:32,237
Well, what interest is
my brother's Bible to you?
1492
01:17:32,279 --> 01:17:33,613
Brother!
1493
01:17:33,655 --> 01:17:35,365
Thank God for that!
1494
01:17:35,407 --> 01:17:36,717
I packed the
damned thing by mistake.
1495
01:17:36,741 --> 01:17:38,118
I thought it was War and
Peace.
1496
01:17:38,159 --> 01:17:41,705
- Your father wishes to say...
- Mother, I am thirty years of age,
1497
01:17:41,746 --> 01:17:44,416
and you're acting as if
I'm still not off the tit!
1498
01:17:44,457 --> 01:17:46,459
I love her!
1499
01:17:46,585 --> 01:17:47,752
I'll go.
1500
01:17:47,794 --> 01:17:50,046
I don't have tits!
1501
01:17:52,007 --> 01:17:53,967
And age has nothing to do with
1502
01:17:54,009 --> 01:17:56,845
being able to look someone
in the face and tell their sex.
1503
01:17:56,886 --> 01:18:00,765
You don't seem to have grasped,
even at your age,
1504
01:18:00,807 --> 01:18:04,936
what most people can tell
by the time they're three months.
1505
01:18:04,978 --> 01:18:08,607
- Jo is not...
- Who the hell is Fred Delaney?
1506
01:18:09,482 --> 01:18:11,362
Oh, my God, it's Fred Delaney.
Jo, it's for you.
1507
01:18:11,401 --> 01:18:13,111
- Daddy?
- He sounds furious.
1508
01:18:13,153 --> 01:18:14,696
I mean, why is he phoning here?
1509
01:18:14,738 --> 01:18:16,823
- He's screaming something at you.
- Well, shall I?
1510
01:18:16,865 --> 01:18:19,218
I mean, I hadn't told him I was
going to be here this weekend.
1511
01:18:19,242 --> 01:18:20,886
Well, that shows
a remarkable lack of...
1512
01:18:20,910 --> 01:18:22,750
- How did he find out?
- I don't know. Take it.
1513
01:18:23,455 --> 01:18:25,707
Hello, Daddy?
It's not really you?
1514
01:18:25,790 --> 01:18:28,084
- Are you all right?
- Yes. Good Lord, yes. I'm fine.
1515
01:18:28,168 --> 01:18:30,128
I'm perfectly all right.
Why shouldn't I be?
1516
01:18:30,253 --> 01:18:32,005
I'm too old for this.
If Laurie finds out...
1517
01:18:32,047 --> 01:18:33,798
- Look, I can't hear you.
- Come home.
1518
01:18:33,840 --> 01:18:34,841
At once.
1519
01:18:34,883 --> 01:18:36,885
I can't. I'm with
Laurie and the parents.
1520
01:18:36,968 --> 01:18:38,219
They're very nice people.
1521
01:18:38,303 --> 01:18:39,971
Mr Mason's particularly nice.
1522
01:18:40,847 --> 01:18:42,807
Ask them why they telephoned us.
1523
01:18:43,224 --> 01:18:44,934
Did you telephone my parents?
1524
01:18:45,018 --> 01:18:46,579
- Not an intentional...
- Of course we didn't.
1525
01:18:46,603 --> 01:18:48,205
- Oh, we didn't. Did we?
- Now you know damn well we did.
1526
01:18:48,229 --> 01:18:50,565
- Let's get one thing straight.
- Oh! Oh, yes.
1527
01:18:50,607 --> 01:18:54,152
It's coming back to me.
The Dela... Oh,
those Delaneys!
1528
01:18:54,194 --> 01:18:56,154
Yes, I think we did.
1529
01:18:56,196 --> 01:18:58,490
- Why? Did they say we did?
- Yes.
1530
01:18:58,531 --> 01:19:00,283
What the hell did
you call them for?
1531
01:19:00,367 --> 01:19:01,868
Ask them what's happening.
1532
01:19:01,951 --> 01:19:04,245
Well, they seem to say "yes".
Yes, they did.
1533
01:19:04,329 --> 01:19:06,539
- Why did you phone them?
- Laurie, be quiet!
1534
01:19:06,581 --> 01:19:08,434
Would you just keep from
meddling in my affairs?
1535
01:19:08,458 --> 01:19:09,709
Are they mad?
1536
01:19:09,834 --> 01:19:11,336
Mummy, you too?
1537
01:19:11,378 --> 01:19:12,796
What a full house.
1538
01:19:12,879 --> 01:19:14,255
Yes, I am perfectly all right.
1539
01:19:14,297 --> 01:19:16,424
Oh, it's so hot here.
It's a hundred in the shade.
1540
01:19:16,466 --> 01:19:18,593
If you're a prisoner,
I'm calling the police.
1541
01:19:19,010 --> 01:19:20,404
No, no, no, no.
Don't call the police.
1542
01:19:20,428 --> 01:19:21,781
I knew we hadn't impressed them.
1543
01:19:21,805 --> 01:19:24,057
Well, the call didn't
go quite as we planned.
1544
01:19:24,182 --> 01:19:25,910
I don't know what she
thinks is happening to me.
1545
01:19:25,934 --> 01:19:27,852
Mother, we're
practically under arrest.
1546
01:19:27,936 --> 01:19:29,979
Is that girl, Laurie, a boy?
1547
01:19:30,146 --> 01:19:31,648
Yes, Laurie is a boy.
1548
01:19:31,690 --> 01:19:33,692
Good God, not that it's
any of your business.
1549
01:19:33,817 --> 01:19:36,152
But Laurie is a girl's name.
1550
01:19:36,194 --> 01:19:38,446
Jo, when are you
going to settle down?
1551
01:19:38,488 --> 01:19:39,965
I don't know when
I'm going to settle down.
1552
01:19:39,989 --> 01:19:41,384
When you die
and leave me some money.
1553
01:19:41,408 --> 01:19:43,344
Now will you drop that
"more married than thou" act
1554
01:19:43,368 --> 01:19:44,953
and get off the line!
1555
01:19:45,203 --> 01:19:47,247
No, I don't love you!
Or Mummy!
1556
01:19:48,164 --> 01:19:50,291
Oh, they seem to think I'm
in some kind of asylum.
1557
01:19:50,333 --> 01:19:51,960
Not some kind, the worst.
1558
01:19:52,460 --> 01:19:55,255
You will be grateful
to me, Laurie,
1559
01:19:55,296 --> 01:19:57,507
when you hear
what Daddy has to say.
1560
01:19:57,882 --> 01:19:59,843
Oh, no, not even you
can't believe that!
1561
01:19:59,884 --> 01:20:01,302
I have nothing more to say.
1562
01:20:01,344 --> 01:20:03,722
Mother, dear, doesn't it
ever occur to you
1563
01:20:03,763 --> 01:20:07,183
that I might know everything
that she is and isn't by now?
1564
01:20:07,225 --> 01:20:09,203
I know that she's never going
to beat you at Scrabble.
1565
01:20:09,227 --> 01:20:12,439
I know that she's never going to be
Home Counties Badminton Champion,
1566
01:20:12,480 --> 01:20:14,107
or President of your
Needlewomen's Guild,
1567
01:20:14,149 --> 01:20:16,359
or good at church
flower decoration.
1568
01:20:16,609 --> 01:20:20,155
We can discuss her very serious
personality disorders later.
1569
01:20:20,196 --> 01:20:21,531
I'm going upstairs.
1570
01:20:21,573 --> 01:20:24,325
Nobody moves
until I've finished.
1571
01:20:24,367 --> 01:20:29,038
I have spared myself the luxury
of speaking my mind for three decades,
1572
01:20:29,080 --> 01:20:32,125
and now I am
marvellously prepared.
1573
01:20:32,375 --> 01:20:35,336
Jo is not, I believe,
1574
01:20:35,378 --> 01:20:37,964
although I will be happy
to be found wrong...
1575
01:20:38,006 --> 01:20:39,591
Good enough?
1576
01:20:39,674 --> 01:20:41,760
Isn't that what you
were going to say?
1577
01:20:42,302 --> 01:20:44,471
How does a person become that?
1578
01:20:45,680 --> 01:20:47,390
We care for each other.
1579
01:20:47,432 --> 01:20:49,058
We show others we care.
1580
01:20:49,100 --> 01:20:51,060
Isn't that how it's done?
1581
01:20:51,227 --> 01:20:53,813
I want his happiness
as much as you.
1582
01:20:54,022 --> 01:20:57,192
Doesn't it mean anything
to you that we're in love?
1583
01:20:57,734 --> 01:20:59,027
Love!
1584
01:21:01,613 --> 01:21:03,198
Love.
1585
01:21:03,281 --> 01:21:04,908
Oh, Laurie.
1586
01:21:04,949 --> 01:21:09,329
Mother, Jo and I are engaged.
1587
01:21:09,370 --> 01:21:10,955
What did you say?
1588
01:21:10,997 --> 01:21:12,957
Engaged in what?
1589
01:21:13,166 --> 01:21:15,418
Er... Engaged in being married.
1590
01:21:15,960 --> 01:21:17,545
Jo and I are married.
1591
01:21:17,837 --> 01:21:19,255
Yes.
1592
01:21:19,297 --> 01:21:20,882
Yes!
1593
01:21:20,924 --> 01:21:22,467
Did you hear what we said?
1594
01:21:22,509 --> 01:21:24,385
- We're married.
- Engaged and married?
1595
01:21:24,511 --> 01:21:25,678
Yes, in that order.
1596
01:21:25,762 --> 01:21:27,514
Good Lord. Thank God.
1597
01:21:27,555 --> 01:21:29,724
In what sense?
On what possible level?
1598
01:21:29,766 --> 01:21:31,351
- By which law?
- Was this in church?
1599
01:21:31,476 --> 01:21:33,728
Oh, yes. It was a lovely idea.
We couldn't resist.
1600
01:21:33,937 --> 01:21:34,979
Which church?
1601
01:21:35,271 --> 01:21:38,358
- Er, Saint...
- St Mark's, NW6.
1602
01:21:38,608 --> 01:21:41,194
And when did this happy event...
1603
01:21:41,486 --> 01:21:44,280
- Oh, why, yesterday.
- The day before yesterday, yes.
1604
01:21:44,364 --> 01:21:46,991
Well, as there seems to be
some confusion about the dates,
1605
01:21:47,033 --> 01:21:50,161
I suppose you claim to
be married to each other, you...
1606
01:21:50,870 --> 01:21:52,163
Thursday, darling.
1607
01:21:52,205 --> 01:21:53,891
You remember, we were
on the train yesterday?
1608
01:21:53,915 --> 01:21:56,835
Oh, yes! Heavens, we're an
old married couple. Hasn't time flown?
1609
01:21:56,918 --> 01:21:59,230
Is there a marriage certificate?
I'm not asking to see it, of course.
1610
01:21:59,254 --> 01:22:01,172
How can you possibly be married?
1611
01:22:01,548 --> 01:22:03,788
I should have known it.
I knew it at once when I saw you.
1612
01:22:03,842 --> 01:22:06,261
I knew you were in love.
There was this...
1613
01:22:06,302 --> 01:22:09,013
- glow.
- That was the central heating.
1614
01:22:09,055 --> 01:22:11,891
- Congratulations!
- Thank you.
1615
01:22:11,933 --> 01:22:14,269
This is better
news than you know.
1616
01:22:14,310 --> 01:22:16,563
I feel ten years younger.
1617
01:22:17,021 --> 01:22:18,690
Good Lord! Look!
1618
01:22:18,857 --> 01:22:20,400
The thermometer!
1619
01:22:20,525 --> 01:22:22,277
The temperature's falling.
1620
01:22:22,318 --> 01:22:23,903
The oil!
1621
01:22:24,529 --> 01:22:26,614
There's no more oil
to feed the monster.
1622
01:22:26,656 --> 01:22:28,241
Lettice, we've survived!
1623
01:22:28,575 --> 01:22:31,244
Ah, I can breathe again!
1624
01:22:31,286 --> 01:22:33,496
We've come through.
We ought to be celebrating.
1625
01:22:33,580 --> 01:22:36,666
Ah, now for the supreme test.
1626
01:22:37,166 --> 01:22:40,920
Look! There!
Alone, I did it!
1627
01:22:41,045 --> 01:22:43,840
"Or like stout Cortez
when with eagle eyes
1628
01:22:43,882 --> 01:22:45,842
"He stared at the Pacific-
And all his men
1629
01:22:45,884 --> 01:22:48,094
"Look'd at each other
with a wild surmise...
1630
01:22:48,136 --> 01:22:51,097
- "Silent, upon a peak in Darien."
- Hey!
1631
01:22:51,139 --> 01:22:53,308
It's so cool!
Isn't it perfect?
1632
01:22:53,349 --> 01:22:58,521
Beautiful!
Oh, brave new world! Serene!
1633
01:22:59,981 --> 01:23:02,775
My dear, can't you feel
the crisp, brittle air?
1634
01:23:02,817 --> 01:23:04,110
Only too well.
1635
01:23:06,279 --> 01:23:08,406
Oh, let's get away from here!
1636
01:23:08,531 --> 01:23:11,534
We can't stay here now there's
no more oil. We'll freeze!
1637
01:23:11,618 --> 01:23:13,036
We'll spend the
night at the George.
1638
01:23:13,077 --> 01:23:15,330
I hope we don't bump
into anyone we know.
1639
01:23:15,413 --> 01:23:18,166
- May we go as we are?
- No, no, no! I must change!
1640
01:23:18,249 --> 01:23:22,462
Why don't you put on a frock?
Any old thing you might have brought.
1641
01:23:22,629 --> 01:23:25,173
She'll keep us
waiting all afternoon!
1642
01:23:25,590 --> 01:23:28,426
Five minutes to get into
my yellow and a few beads.
1643
01:23:28,468 --> 01:23:31,179
Beads?
1644
01:23:34,515 --> 01:23:35,767
Hello?
1645
01:23:35,808 --> 01:23:37,393
Lettice, darling!
1646
01:23:37,435 --> 01:23:40,355
Thank God it's you.
It's Pamela here.
1647
01:23:40,396 --> 01:23:42,231
It's Pamela.
1648
01:23:43,066 --> 01:23:46,027
I'm so sorry
you hastened away last night.
1649
01:23:47,278 --> 01:23:49,489
PAMELA:
Darling, I do understand.
1650
01:23:49,572 --> 01:23:51,616
'Course, I didn't until lunchtime.
1651
01:23:52,408 --> 01:23:53,408
Lunchtime?
1652
01:23:53,618 --> 01:23:56,120
Yes, Peter took me to
the George for a drink.
1653
01:23:56,162 --> 01:23:57,622
Lord, we needed one.
1654
01:23:57,664 --> 01:24:00,708
Actually, we needed two after
we'd seen Laurie and his friend.
1655
01:24:01,042 --> 01:24:03,586
You mean Josephine.
1656
01:24:05,380 --> 01:24:07,757
Well, he may call himself
Josephine, darling,
1657
01:24:07,799 --> 01:24:09,300
but way down upon
the Swanee River,
1658
01:24:09,342 --> 01:24:10,927
I think they'd settle for Jo.
1659
01:24:11,177 --> 01:24:14,472
They were married
in church two days ago.
1660
01:24:15,807 --> 01:24:16,975
Are you...
1661
01:24:17,016 --> 01:24:18,851
Are you sure?
1662
01:24:19,435 --> 01:24:22,105
I mean, she looked so...
dominant.
1663
01:24:22,188 --> 01:24:24,732
You must
move with the times, Pamela.
1664
01:24:24,774 --> 01:24:28,361
Young people tend not to think
about sex differences these days.
1665
01:24:28,403 --> 01:24:30,613
It's love that matters.
1666
01:24:30,655 --> 01:24:32,365
See you soon.
1667
01:24:33,616 --> 01:24:35,743
That settled her.
1668
01:24:37,787 --> 01:24:39,539
I must go and wash.
1669
01:24:39,580 --> 01:24:41,624
Will the water be hot enough?
I'll need to shave.
1670
01:24:41,666 --> 01:24:43,126
Me, too.
1671
01:24:43,584 --> 01:24:46,087
I... I mean, I need hot water.
1672
01:24:46,754 --> 01:24:51,300
Oh, yes, well, I should think there'll
be plenty of hot water still for...
1673
01:24:51,759 --> 01:24:53,219
Are you going to
change, Mrs Mason?
1674
01:24:53,469 --> 01:24:56,014
I shall simply add
a thick black veil.
1675
01:24:56,681 --> 01:24:58,224
Now, Mother, what's the matter?
1676
01:24:58,349 --> 01:25:00,268
Do you know what I want to do?
1677
01:25:00,309 --> 01:25:01,853
Not another confession!
1678
01:25:02,186 --> 01:25:03,855
I want to call you "Mother".
1679
01:25:04,564 --> 01:25:08,568
You must ask your father.
1680
01:25:10,695 --> 01:25:12,113
Well, why not?
1681
01:25:12,155 --> 01:25:15,074
After all, we're not losing
a daughter, we're gaining a...
1682
01:25:48,399 --> 01:25:55,740
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