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1
00:00:01,100 --> 00:00:03,680
- OK, I'm gonna
make this perfectly clear.
2
00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:06,960
And I'm glad this happened. It's
a good reminder for the whole team.
3
00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:11,640
If a pigeon or a flock of pigeons are
near or in the middle of a drug bust,
4
00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:13,960
the pigeons are not culpable.
5
00:00:14,200 --> 00:00:16,000
- I didn't say they were
culpable, Sarge.
6
00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,840
I said they impeded my investigation
by im-poo-ding on me.
7
00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:22,320
- OK, Parker. Well, just so you know,
8
00:00:22,520 --> 00:00:24,320
we are removing the file
on the pigeon.
9
00:00:24,520 --> 00:00:26,080
- I still maintain
that they were trained.
10
00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:28,720
- All right. (CLEARS THROAT)
Moving right along -- new business.
11
00:00:28,920 --> 00:00:29,900
A missing girl,
12
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,540
Sophie Wilks -- 13 years old,
13
00:00:32,920 --> 00:00:35,320
last seen two days ago
on Sales Island.
14
00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:38,540
The last known communication
was this Chap-Snat.
15
00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:41,330
Chap... Chat! Chat-Snap.
16
00:00:42,560 --> 00:00:43,550
Lights, please.
17
00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:46,600
- SOPHIE ON VIDEO:
It's so important to unplug
18
00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:48,240
and be one with nature.
19
00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:50,450
(FOREBODING MUSIC)
20
00:00:52,560 --> 00:00:53,490
(SOPHIE GASPS)
21
00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:55,720
Oh my gosh. No. No!
22
00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:56,670
No! No!
23
00:00:57,360 --> 00:00:59,470
(CREATURE CACKLES, SOPHIE SCREAMS)
24
00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:02,730
('WELLINGTON PARANORMAL' THEME MUSIC)
25
00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:24,900
Captions by Able.
26
00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:28,800
Captions were made with
the support of NZ On Air.
27
00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:31,400
www.able.co.nz
Copyright Able 2022
28
00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:35,570
- Sophie Wilks apparently visited
Sales Island but never returned.
29
00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:38,560
The captain says
she was not on the ferry,
30
00:01:38,760 --> 00:01:41,920
and the residents say she's not on
the island. Who's telling the truth?
31
00:01:42,120 --> 00:01:45,200
- Well, I mean, you are...
telling the truth. That's one.
32
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:47,310
- I'm gonna say... the captain.
33
00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:49,520
- Well, then I'll guess
the residents. Yep.
34
00:01:49,720 --> 00:01:51,520
- Mm, who's right?
- Then we've got both, yeah.
35
00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:54,600
- This is Sophie last month
on her 13th birthday.
36
00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:57,870
- Whoa. Girls develop
so much faster than boys, eh?
37
00:01:58,400 --> 00:01:59,800
- She's very mature for her age.
38
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:03,080
- I want to get officers on the
island tonight, but it's complicated.
39
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,890
See, the inhabitants
are a religious sect.
40
00:02:06,680 --> 00:02:09,560
They've been there for generations,
cut off from the rest of the world,
41
00:02:09,760 --> 00:02:12,710
and their ways are arcane.
- What does that mean?
42
00:02:13,000 --> 00:02:14,800
- It's, uh, very, like, old.
- Old-fashioned-y.
43
00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:15,880
- Old-fashioned.
- Old-fashioned-y.
44
00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:19,600
- According to this, I, uh, have a
letter sent to me by one of the, um--
45
00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:21,670
The religious leaders. Thus...
46
00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:26,130
READS: 'Only those who virgin be
shalt set foot on our sacred land.
47
00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:28,950
'Any impure soul
shalt an intruder be.'
48
00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:30,540
-Hmm.
- Uh.
49
00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:34,180
Now, I realise that this is
a deeply personal question
50
00:02:34,760 --> 00:02:36,310
for me to ask. But, uh...
51
00:02:36,880 --> 00:02:37,580
(CRASHING)
52
00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:39,370
(PARKER GIGGLES)
53
00:02:40,920 --> 00:02:43,840
- Go and-- Go and deal with Parker,
please, Minogue.
54
00:02:44,040 --> 00:02:44,850
- Ow! (GASPS)
55
00:02:47,640 --> 00:02:50,300
- Look, I mean,
how do they define 'virgin'?
56
00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:54,480
- Well, they say, 'Those who hath
not lain with the opposite sex.'
57
00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:57,560
- Well, mechanically speaking...
- By that definition, then...
58
00:02:57,760 --> 00:02:59,190
- I'm a 'virgin'.
-Mm.
59
00:02:59,960 --> 00:03:02,440
- I'm a virgin too.
- Wow. Really, Minogue?
60
00:03:02,640 --> 00:03:05,080
- Really?
- Yeah. I didn't know you were.
61
00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:07,920
- You're a-- Wow. Very...
- SOFTLY: I'm... I'm not.
62
00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:09,040
- ...good.
- Yeah, that's...
63
00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:10,520
- It's easy.
- Yeah. Good on you.
64
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:12,750
- Yeah, I read that roughly 12%...
65
00:03:14,080 --> 00:03:15,760
Of people my age -- virgins.
66
00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:17,480
-Wow.
- 12%?
67
00:03:17,680 --> 00:03:19,240
- Roughly.
- Right, well, the two of you
68
00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:21,880
better get going, then.
(CLEARS THROAT)
69
00:03:22,840 --> 00:03:23,890
(HAUNTING MUSIC)
70
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:25,920
- So, we're being ferried over
to the island
71
00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:29,000
by our old friend Captain Quinn,
who's helped us out before.
72
00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:30,920
- Oh, I'm sorry to see
your eye still hasn't healed.
73
00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:33,250
- It did heal. This is my other eye.
74
00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:35,360
- That's quite bad luck.
75
00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:37,800
- The story of how my eye
ended up like this
76
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:40,160
is not for the faint of heart,
my friends.
77
00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:41,910
- What is it?
- Fly spray.
78
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:43,800
ยป Hy spray?
79
00:03:44,040 --> 00:03:46,580
- I had the nozzle
pointing the wrong way.
80
00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:51,380
(DRAMATIC MUSIC BUILDS)
81
00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:54,600
You watch yourselves out there.
82
00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:58,510
I'm not going on that island
if I don't have to.
83
00:03:59,780 --> 00:04:01,720
There's something about
the Hornvale Community
84
00:04:01,920 --> 00:04:03,710
that's just not quite right.
85
00:04:04,040 --> 00:04:04,850
The rituals,
86
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:06,670
the religion.
87
00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:09,050
The orgies.
- Orgies?
88
00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:11,440
- How did you find out
about these goings-on?
89
00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:13,370
- Wouldn't you like to know?
90
00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:15,870
- Yes. I would.
- I would.
91
00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:18,190
- I read it online.
92
00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:21,090
(FOREBODING MUSIC)
93
00:04:23,720 --> 00:04:25,160
- Hey, O'Leary.
- Yeah?
94
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:29,880
- Are you experiencing, like, a...
an ominous sense of foreboding?
95
00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:31,420
- No.
96
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,160
- Yeah, me neither.
97
00:04:35,720 --> 00:04:38,160
- Esteemed officers of the law!
Welcome!
98
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:42,720
- Thanks. Um, I'm Officer O'Leary.
- And I'm Officer Minogue.
99
00:04:42,920 --> 00:04:45,680
- My name is Avalon,
but you can call me Mama.
100
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,830
- Thanks.
- 'Thanks, Mama.'
101
00:04:51,680 --> 00:04:53,230
Say it.
- OTHERS: Say it.
102
00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:56,250
- Thanks, Mama.
103
00:04:57,120 --> 00:04:58,040
- Thanks, Mama.
104
00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:00,800
- I'm surprised such
gorgeous individuals
105
00:05:01,120 --> 00:05:03,340
could meet our special requirements.
106
00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:05,880
- She doesn't look surprised.
107
00:05:06,080 --> 00:05:07,600
- I don't think gorgeous
has anything to do with it.
108
00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,170
- This is Thomath.
- Praise to the Horn.
109
00:05:10,840 --> 00:05:11,960
- Cut it out.
- What did he say?
110
00:05:12,160 --> 00:05:12,910
- And Lilda.
111
00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:15,900
Come back up.
112
00:05:17,160 --> 00:05:21,100
They will be your personal escorts
on the island at every moment.
113
00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:23,160
- Is that still legal?
114
00:05:23,360 --> 00:05:26,200
- They will take great pleasure
in serving you.
115
00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:29,280
- Looking forward to hanging out,
Thomath and Lilda.
116
00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:30,920
- I feel like we're digressing, OK?
117
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:35,160
Because what I would like to know is
actually if any of you have seen...
118
00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:36,930
Sophie Wilks.
- (GIGGLES)
119
00:05:37,280 --> 00:05:39,350
Let's not go into that right now.
120
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:41,760
We should away to Hornvale.
121
00:05:42,560 --> 00:05:44,200
- Sorry, where are we going?
122
00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:45,100
- Hornvale.
123
00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:46,840
- Are you saying...
124
00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:49,200
Are you saying
Hornvale or Hornville?
125
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:50,100
- Hornvale.
126
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:52,090
Follow me.
127
00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:55,010
(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)
128
00:05:56,640 --> 00:05:58,250
- O'Leary.
- What's that?
129
00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:01,760
- It's freaky, eh?
130
00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:02,770
- Come along.
131
00:06:09,000 --> 00:06:11,200
- Avalon.
- Wait for us please, Mama.
132
00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:15,820
(RENAISSANCE MUSIC PLAYS)
133
00:06:18,480 --> 00:06:19,640
(PEOPLE CHAT-FER)
134
00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:27,930
- Gidday, mate.
135
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:30,230
(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)
136
00:06:31,880 --> 00:06:33,100
- Bless your purity.
137
00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:36,880
Your presence here is what we have
prayed to the great Horned One for.
138
00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:38,410
- Ah! Ah, ah, Elspeth.
139
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:41,230
Tend to your needlework.
140
00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,340
Let us lead you to your lodgings.
141
00:06:49,280 --> 00:06:50,380
- She seemed nice.
142
00:06:51,840 --> 00:06:52,710
(DOOR CREAKS)
143
00:06:54,920 --> 00:06:57,410
- I hope you find
your quarters suitable.
144
00:06:57,840 --> 00:06:59,960
- Do you have anything, um...
- Nicer?
145
00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:01,800
- Well, this is my childhood bedroom,
146
00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:04,600
so I'd appreciate you
not criticising it.
147
00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:06,930
Please take a seat.
148
00:07:07,720 --> 00:07:10,290
(RENAISSANCE MUSIC CONTINUES
IN DISTANCE)
149
00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:13,410
We know so much about you.
150
00:07:14,640 --> 00:07:16,020
It's only fair you...
151
00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:17,850
get to know us.
152
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:21,190
(CHUCKLES)
- How do you know about us?
153
00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:23,530
- QUIETLY: Start the tape.
154
00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:25,710
(BRIGHT FLUTE MUSIC PLAYS)
155
00:07:27,840 --> 00:07:29,620
- Oh. I didn't see you there.
156
00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:31,020
- That's you.
157
00:07:31,560 --> 00:07:34,430
- No, no. This is an old video.
That's my mama.
158
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:36,720
The Mama mama.
159
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:40,120
- Don't you think
that looks just like her?
160
00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:43,840
- Mm, yeah. Well, they're related.
- ...community of free spirits
161
00:07:44,040 --> 00:07:46,410
who trust in the prosperity
of nature,
162
00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:50,840
just as we trust in
the prosperity of the soul.
163
00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:52,290
(DOOR SHUTS)
164
00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:55,060
You will love it here.
165
00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:57,410
Your time with us
166
00:07:58,120 --> 00:07:59,160
will be blessed.
167
00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:01,080
(HAUNTING MUSIC)
168
00:08:01,280 --> 00:08:02,660
You will love it here.
169
00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:06,150
Your time with us...
170
00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:08,840
will be blessed.
171
00:08:09,440 --> 00:08:10,550
(DEMONIC WAILING)
172
00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:12,590
ECHOES: You will do...
173
00:08:13,640 --> 00:08:14,260
as I say.
174
00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:19,200
- (SNORES)
175
00:08:21,360 --> 00:08:22,630
- Hey, what was that?
176
00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:24,870
(INTENSE MUSIC)
177
00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,150
That-- That's Sophie.
178
00:08:33,440 --> 00:08:35,240
Minogue, are you seeing this?
179
00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:36,880
- (SNORES)
180
00:08:39,680 --> 00:08:40,250
- Up, up!
181
00:08:41,180 --> 00:08:43,120
Yep, now, OK. Stand--
Listen to me. Stand up.
182
00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:44,240
- (MOANS)
- up-
183
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,290
(STRAINS) Come on, outside.
184
00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:48,090
- What happened?
- (PANTS)
185
00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:50,040
You were hypnotised.
186
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:52,960
Sarge, Sarge! Do you read me?
- I don't think I can be hypnotised.
187
00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:55,360
You've gotta be open to suggestion,
and I'm not.
188
00:08:55,560 --> 00:08:57,320
- Yes, you are.
- Oh, maybe I am.
189
00:08:57,520 --> 00:08:58,040
' Sarge!
190
00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:01,760
- Come in, O'Leary.
(STATIC CRACKLES)
191
00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:03,770
O'Leary, please respond.
192
00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:05,160
(EXHALES)
193
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:07,800
Parker.
194
00:09:09,600 --> 00:09:11,320
I know you're there, Parker.
195
00:09:11,520 --> 00:09:12,090
Come in.
196
00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:16,200
- PARKER: Into the office?
- Yes, Parker.
197
00:09:17,480 --> 00:09:18,980
Yep. Quickly.
- Come in?
198
00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:20,200
I was just walking past,
199
00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:23,520
and I heard you call my name, just...
- Sure. Take a seat.
200
00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:26,070
Parker, can I speak to you
man to man?
201
00:09:26,920 --> 00:09:28,870
- Yes, of course, cos I am a man.
202
00:09:29,120 --> 00:09:30,980
- I am feeling somewhat guilty.
203
00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:35,120
- Of always locking me out,
and now using me as a sounding board
204
00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:38,920
cos I'm the only one left?
- Uh, no. What if I was to tell you
205
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:42,360
that I'm starting to put two and two
together about Sales Island?
206
00:09:42,560 --> 00:09:45,860
- Oh. If you said that,
I would be like, 'Oh, whoa, Sarge.
207
00:09:46,060 --> 00:09:48,320
'That sounds really interesting.
Have you learnt anything?'
208
00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:50,960
- Mm-hm. And I would reply,
'Check this out.'
209
00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:53,300
Have a look at these clippings, OK?
210
00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:57,600
Now, people have been going missing
on the island at regular intervals,
211
00:09:57,800 --> 00:09:59,640
uh, for the last 90-odd years.
212
00:09:59,840 --> 00:10:03,400
And every time, they've requested
that, uh, the investigating officers
213
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:05,710
meet very specific qualifications.
214
00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:07,690
They're all virgins.
215
00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:10,520
- Whoa, even him?
- Yeah, yeah. Apparently.
216
00:10:11,560 --> 00:10:13,080
- That's a waste.
- None of those
217
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:16,120
investigating officers
have ever returned from the island.
218
00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:16,890
- Oh, OK.
219
00:10:17,820 --> 00:10:19,760
- God, they must love it
over there, do you reckon?
220
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:22,360
- Maybe. But the more
I think about it, the...
221
00:10:22,560 --> 00:10:24,560
the more I fear that the sect
are deliberately trying to
222
00:10:24,760 --> 00:10:27,080
lure virginal officers
to the island.
223
00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:30,840
- Why would they do that, Sarge?
I mean, what good is virginity,
224
00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:32,400
except for when it
comes to olive oil?
225
00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:33,770
- Human sacrifices.
226
00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:35,200
(INTENSE MUSIC)
227
00:10:35,400 --> 00:10:35,740
-Ah.
228
00:10:36,720 --> 00:10:38,720
- We should go.
- What, me with you?
229
00:10:38,920 --> 00:10:40,280
- Yes, Parker.
- (GASPS)
230
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:42,520
- Just one more thing, though.
-Yeah? (EXHALES)
231
00:10:42,720 --> 00:10:44,680
- What kind of gift
do you think would say best,
232
00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:48,070
'I'm sorry for questioning you
about your virginity
233
00:10:48,680 --> 00:10:51,940
'and potentially leading you
to a ritualistic death?'
234
00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:54,810
- Yeah. Probably choccies.
- Yeah. Perfect.
235
00:10:56,640 --> 00:10:57,690
(STIRRING MUSIC)
236
00:10:57,960 --> 00:11:00,760
- Just wondering if you guys
have seen this girl?
237
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:01,930
- No.
- No? You?
238
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:05,710
Apparently, she's 13.
239
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:07,800
How old are you?
- 14.
240
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:09,900
- 14.50 you're older than her.
241
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:13,340
Which I'm finding hard to believe.
242
00:11:13,700 --> 00:11:16,960
Have you guys got the, um--
the Wi-Fi password around here?
243
00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,240
Because I need to check my emails.
244
00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:21,720
- What's Wi-Fi password?
245
00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:25,800
- Captain Quinn, do you copy?
(STATIC CRACKLES)
246
00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:28,150
Nothing.
- No cell coverage either.
247
00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:30,650
- Pray to the Horn!
- (GASPS)
248
00:11:31,120 --> 00:11:32,750
Hey, Mama. Thomath, Lilda.
249
00:11:33,640 --> 00:11:36,640
- I trust the video refreshed you?
- I do not feel refreshed.
250
00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:39,210
- Yeah. I feel a bit
rubbish, actually.
251
00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:41,510
- Pray to the Horn.
252
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:44,200
- You know, I've got
a lot of questions about that
253
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:47,000
'instructional' video.
First of all, when did you film it?
254
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:49,380
I... I told you. I wasn't born yet.
255
00:11:51,040 --> 00:11:53,000
- OK, that's impossible.
Sophie Wilks was in that video.
256
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:55,160
- Look, Mama, we don't want to get
off on the wrong foot, all right?
257
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:56,600
We really enjoyed that video,
258
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,360
and we're really
enjoying these massages.
259
00:11:58,560 --> 00:12:00,320
But the fact of the matter is,
we're here on police business,
260
00:12:00,520 --> 00:12:02,440
and a young girl has gone missing.
261
00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:03,690
- Lilda, Thomath,
262
00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:07,480
why don't we draw
the officers a hot bath?
263
00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:08,080
- Ooh.
264
00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:10,840
- No.
- No. No hot bath, OK?
265
00:12:11,040 --> 00:12:12,760
We need to interview the residents.
- Mm.
266
00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:13,940
- Slow is smooth
267
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:16,170
and smooth is fast.
268
00:12:17,520 --> 00:12:18,500
Obey the voice!
269
00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:23,340
You must remain...
- I must remain...
270
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,460
- No, no, no. OK, no.
271
00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:28,760
We need to continue
our investigation, OK?
272
00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:29,540
Minogue!
273
00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:31,280
Let's go. Come on.
274
00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:34,290
- Copy that.
Continuing investigation. (PANTS)
275
00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,120
- Esteemed officers!
Esteemed officers!
276
00:12:38,360 --> 00:12:41,840
- As you can see, we have managed
to lose Thomath, Lilda and Mama,
277
00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:44,880
who, while lovely,
were hindering the investigation.
278
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:47,600
Uh, the police service is funded
through the generosity
279
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,760
of the New Zealand taxpayer,
and we honour,
280
00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:52,360
uh, that generosity
through time efficiency,
281
00:12:52,560 --> 00:12:55,520
although it did take a few hours
to lose them on this occasion.
282
00:12:55,720 --> 00:12:58,280
- Yeah, we've encountered some
traditions here on Sales Island
283
00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:01,720
which, at best, could be described
as Nordic -- at worst, demonic.
284
00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:04,480
Um, we in the police service,
we've got our own traditions too.
285
00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:07,000
And those traditions are called
process and procedure.
286
00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:09,520
So we're now gonna continue
with the investigation.
287
00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:11,520
Hello. Just wondering
if you'd help me. Um,
288
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,440
wondering if perhaps
you've seen this girl.
289
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,930
(RENAISSANCE FLUTE MUSIC PLAYS)
290
00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:18,720
You haven't seen her? OK.
291
00:13:18,920 --> 00:13:20,360
Um, have you got any information
292
00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:23,050
that could potentially
help me find her?
293
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:25,400
- WHISPERS: You could
speak to the elders.
294
00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:26,410
- The elders.
295
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:31,750
Is that the, uh,
the naked gentlemen over there?
296
00:13:32,400 --> 00:13:33,760
Is there perhaps
someone else I could talk to
297
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:37,240
that might be able to help me?
- Just speak to the elders.
298
00:13:37,440 --> 00:13:38,190
- Thank you.
299
00:13:39,980 --> 00:13:41,020
Minogue!
-- Yep,
300
00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:45,060
- Do you wanna speak to these guys?
- Mm.
301
00:13:45,480 --> 00:13:46,710
Evening, gentlemen.
302
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:49,400
I'm Officer Minogue. This is
my colleague, Officer O'Leary.
303
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,560
- Hello there.
I'm not loving this, to be fair.
304
00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:53,800
OK, I'm not quite sure what
the rules are on this island,
305
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,800
but I will be checking them
as soon as we're done here,
306
00:13:56,000 --> 00:13:57,600
and you can consider yourselves
lucky just to get away
307
00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,320
with a warning this time.
- This girl...
308
00:13:59,520 --> 00:13:59,920
- Nah.
309
00:14:00,720 --> 00:14:02,440
-What?
- Well, it is a girl.
310
00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:04,720
- Mm.
- Look. Do you recognise her?
311
00:14:05,140 --> 00:14:06,760
- No.
- Felt like you had that answer
312
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,320
in your head before
I even showed it to you.
313
00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:08,920
-Hmm.
314
00:14:10,080 --> 00:14:12,380
- Is that a dismissive 'hmm'?
- BOTH: Mm.
315
00:14:12,580 --> 00:14:13,920
- But you have not seen this girl?
- This one?
316
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,240
- BOTH: Mm-mm.
- What about this one?
317
00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:18,400
- Same girl.
- Yeah, have you seen her?
318
00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:19,280
- No.
-Mm.
319
00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:21,840
- She's wearing this
very distinctive outfit,
320
00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:24,520
that lovely orange coat.
- The dressmaker.
321
00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:27,160
- Sorry?
- You need to see the dressmaker.
322
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:29,080
- Where would I find
this dressmaker?
323
00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:30,330
- (CLEARS THROAT)
324
00:14:31,040 --> 00:14:32,240
Dave-o!
- Dave-o?
325
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:36,720
I do quite like those
matching hairdos.
326
00:14:36,920 --> 00:14:37,960
Good evening, sir.
327
00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:39,080
Also no pants.
328
00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:41,840
Um, just wondering if you could
help me. Do you remember selling
329
00:14:42,040 --> 00:14:43,020
to this person?
330
00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:45,100
- Yes.
- OK.
331
00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:48,200
Um, in relation to what
you were selling to her,
332
00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:50,830
was it potentially an orange coat?
- No.
333
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:56,240
- So you didn't sell her this orange
coat here in this photograph?
334
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:56,780
- No.
335
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:01,070
It was a terracotta cape.
- BOY: Psst.
336
00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:06,960
- OK, look. I'll be back to talk
to you. Maybe make some pants.
337
00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:08,720
Hello. Can I help you?
338
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:12,110
- Sophie. She...
She's preparing for the Horned One.
339
00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:15,140
- The what, sorry?
- WHISPERS: Horned One.
340
00:15:15,760 --> 00:15:17,240
- The Horned One, OK.
So where is she?
341
00:15:17,440 --> 00:15:19,720
- The sacrifice.
- The what, sorry? Sorry, what?
342
00:15:19,920 --> 00:15:21,780
The sac-- The sacrifice? Wait.
343
00:15:23,940 --> 00:15:25,880
OK, so, what I, uh--
what I suspect is happening is
344
00:15:26,080 --> 00:15:27,380
they intend to sacrifice Sophie,
345
00:15:27,580 --> 00:15:30,000
which is not an ideal situation
in anyone's books.
346
00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:32,160
Minogue!
(RENAISSANCE FLUTE MUSIC PLAYS)
347
00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:32,940
Minogue?
348
00:15:34,120 --> 00:15:34,700
Minogue?
349
00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:38,180
Minogue, snap out of it!
350
00:15:38,380 --> 00:15:40,980
- (GROANS) Oh, hey, guys.
What's going on?
351
00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:44,730
- Minogue, stop getting hypnotised.
- When was this?
352
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:46,390
- Esteemed officers!
353
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,190
(INTENSE PERCUSSION MUSIC PLAYS)
354
00:15:52,520 --> 00:15:56,220
- OK, can you guys stop that, OK?
I'm already quite stressed.
355
00:15:56,600 --> 00:15:57,920
Through some old-fashioned
interviewing,
356
00:15:58,120 --> 00:16:00,120
I have obtained some intel
on Sophie Wilks' whereabouts.
357
00:16:00,320 --> 00:16:01,280
- Because time is of the essence,
358
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:03,600
I'd like to make the executive
decision that we do not include Mama
359
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:07,740
and the twins in our next movements.
- I agree with that decision.
360
00:16:08,800 --> 00:16:10,250
Sophie!
- Sophie Wilks!
361
00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:11,000
Sophie!
362
00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:12,800
- That's her!
(GIRL LAUGHS)
363
00:16:13,000 --> 00:16:14,040
- Come back here!
364
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:17,390
(INTENSE MUSIC)
365
00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:20,840
(GIRL CACKLES)
- BOTH: There she is!
366
00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:22,840
- Sophie!
- Come back, Sophie!
367
00:16:23,640 --> 00:16:24,480
Is that her there?
368
00:16:24,680 --> 00:16:26,640
- No. i-I think
that's another person.
369
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:28,010
(DISTANT CACKLING)
370
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:29,520
Sophie!
371
00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:32,460
Aah!
372
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:37,320
- Thomath? What are you doing
out this late? Thomath!
373
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:39,080
- Not Sophie.
- I'm very disappointed in you,
374
00:16:39,280 --> 00:16:40,440
Thomath.
- Sophie!
375
00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:42,060
Minogue, turn around.
376
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:44,010
(SPOOKY MUSIC)
377
00:16:44,720 --> 00:16:46,680
- Who are they supposed to be?
- I think they're supposed to be us.
378
00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:48,840
- I don't look like that.
That's a good one of you, though.
379
00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:50,600
-Why are they here?
- I think it's in case something
380
00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:53,360
'happens to us', they can send
these ones back in our place,
381
00:16:53,560 --> 00:16:55,640
and nobody would be any the wiser.
382
00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:57,230
(GIRL LAUGHS)
383
00:16:58,200 --> 00:17:00,700
- O'Leary. Regained visual!
- In pursuit!
384
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:03,710
Sophie!
(GIRL LAUGHS)
385
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:06,420
(TENSE, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)
386
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,370
- Perfect timing, esteemed officers.
387
00:17:12,560 --> 00:17:14,470
We could not begin without you.
388
00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:18,020
Well, done, Sophie.
You did beautifully.
389
00:17:18,400 --> 00:17:19,500
- Thank you, Mama.
390
00:17:20,600 --> 00:17:22,500
- You led the lambs right to us.
391
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,480
- Surprise twist --
it would appear that we're, um,
392
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:27,680
actually the ones being sacrificed.
- I reckon I saw that coming,
393
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:28,980
actually.
-What?
394
00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:30,870
(INTENSE MUSIC)
395
00:17:33,760 --> 00:17:34,960
- Didn't wanna go anyway.
396
00:17:35,160 --> 00:17:35,215
- Didn't wanna go anyway.
397
00:17:35,375 --> 00:17:36,065
(ALL BRAY)
398
00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:41,400
- The Horned One!
399
00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:43,130
The time is nigh!
400
00:17:45,240 --> 00:17:47,910
We repay you for these
tremendous blessings
401
00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:53,080
by sacrificing these esteemed
officers of the law to you,
402
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:56,840
oh great and generous lord.
Here they are.
403
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:59,630
Look at them,
our lovely human offerings.
404
00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:02,920
How does that align
with your thinking?
405
00:18:03,120 --> 00:18:04,560
- Well, it doesn't align
with our thinking at all.
406
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:06,790
- Look, I understand this is hard.
407
00:18:07,840 --> 00:18:10,830
Well, it wouldn't be a sacrifice
if it was easy.
408
00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:13,760
(ALL LAUGH)
(GIGGLES MANIACALLY)
409
00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:17,250
(ALL BRAY)
410
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:20,300
- Captain Quinn, do you read?
411
00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:21,560
- QUINN, ON RADIO:
Yes, I can read you.
412
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:23,160
- Look, we need you
to call for help.
413
00:18:23,360 --> 00:18:23,820
" Help!
414
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:27,570
- No, this is serious.
We're in a lot of danger.
415
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:29,840
(INTENSE MUSIC BUILDS)
416
00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:32,610
- Yes. You are in a lot of danger.
417
00:18:34,120 --> 00:18:36,200
- Captain Quinn.
What are you doing here?
418
00:18:36,400 --> 00:18:39,650
- Yeah, quite a funny story
behind that one, actually.
419
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:42,610
- Which is?
420
00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:47,080
- They showed me a hypnotic video,
and it hypnotised me.
421
00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:50,860
Now I'm all hypnotised.
422
00:18:51,320 --> 00:18:53,280
- He always picks up
all our little police officers
423
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:55,040
in his little police boat,
don't you?
424
00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:58,120
- FIRMLY: Yes, I do.
- This is not acceptable, you guys.
425
00:18:58,320 --> 00:19:02,430
- CULTISTS: You will like it here.
Your time with us will be blessed.
426
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:05,080
- I-I don't like it here.
- (GROANS, SNORES)
427
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:06,450
- Minogue! Minogue!
428
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:09,210
- ALL: You will love it here!
429
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:12,280
Your time with us will be blessed!
430
00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:16,990
(GENTLE DRUMMING)
431
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:20,680
- So, it seems as though
the cult are gonna go ahead
432
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:23,080
with the, uh, human sacrifice
with only one offering,
433
00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:24,760
that being Officer Minogue.
434
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:26,520
Um, they're probably
a little bit disappointed.
435
00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:28,680
Um, now, obviously, we don't like
to see any police officer
436
00:19:28,880 --> 00:19:32,000
killed for ceremonial purposes,
or for any purpose, really.
437
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:34,000
So I'm gonna try and get in there
and, um, shut that event down
438
00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:37,920
as safely as possible. Um, this not
my first rodeo in crowd control.
439
00:19:38,120 --> 00:19:39,960
Um, so once they've exited
the building,
440
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,680
I'm gonna go in there and
see if I can find a disguise.
441
00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:43,930
Fingers crossed.
442
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:46,720
(TENSE MUSIC BUILDS)
443
00:19:53,120 --> 00:19:55,360
READS: Sacrificial robe.
Cold wash only.
444
00:19:55,560 --> 00:19:57,240
Not a very good dressmaker.
445
00:19:57,720 --> 00:19:58,630
OK, let's go.
446
00:19:59,720 --> 00:20:01,060
(BRAYING IN DISTANCE)
447
00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:04,760
I think it's safe to assume that
Minogue is now being held captive
448
00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:06,880
in that somewhat derelict barn.
449
00:20:07,360 --> 00:20:09,470
It's my job to go and get him out.
450
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,060
(ALL BRAY LOUDLY)
451
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:14,680
- AVALON: Esteemed colleagues...
- Excuse me.
452
00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,880
- ...welcome to the 46th...
- Coming through. Thank you.
453
00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:19,930
- ...biennial sacrifice.
ALL: Pray to the Horn!
454
00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:24,740
- We pray for his continued
blessing of our chosen ones
455
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:26,640
for eternal youth.
456
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:32,530
We give thanks for Sophie,
who hasn't aged a day over 13.
457
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:34,680
- Might want your money back there.
458
00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:37,580
- Uh, myself,
who hasn't aged a day over 21.
459
00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:38,800
- (SCOFFS)
460
00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:42,820
- And Thomath and Lilda,
who have not aged a day past 7.
461
00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:45,380
- (CHUCKLES)
- Let us commence!
462
00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:47,040
(ALL BRAY LOUDLY)
463
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:50,710
ALL: Pray to the Horned One!
Grace us with your presence!
464
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:55,500
Pray to the Horned One!
Grace us with your presence!
465
00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:57,830
(BRAYING CONTINUES)
466
00:20:58,360 --> 00:20:59,800
- Hey, guys.
(ALL GASP)
467
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:02,770
- Pray to the Horn!
ALL: Pray to the Horn!
468
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,310
- All hail, Master. (GIGGLES)
469
00:21:07,760 --> 00:21:10,440
- Looks like the, uh,
oldest virgin I've ever had.
470
00:21:10,640 --> 00:21:11,390
(ALL LAUGH)
471
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:13,290
- Zip, zip!
472
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:17,440
- You're a... Are you full virgin,
or, like, half? Half-virgin?
473
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:18,880
- Well, I am on the cusp of Leo.
474
00:21:19,080 --> 00:21:21,040
- What? What do you mean,
on the cusp of Leo?
475
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,200
- Is that a half-virgin?
Sorry, I thought a virgin was
476
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:25,360
somebody that was
born in August. ls...?
477
00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:27,170
- Wait! He's not a virgin;
478
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:29,440
he's a Virgo.
(ALL MURMUR)
479
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:29,920
Sh!
480
00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:32,520
How dumb are you? Is this true?
481
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:34,740
- What do you call a virgin, then?
482
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,920
Oh, yeah, no. I've done that.
(ALL GROAN)
483
00:21:39,120 --> 00:21:41,090
Yeah, heaps. Heaps.
- What? Ohh!
484
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:43,200
-MAAKA, ON MEGAPHONE:
Stop! Wellington Police!
485
00:21:43,400 --> 00:21:45,720
We have you surrounded!
- PARKER: That's right!
486
00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:46,730
- Cops. Uh...
487
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,190
- No, my Lord.
- Release the adult virgins!
488
00:21:52,120 --> 00:21:52,640
(PANTS)
489
00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:54,970
Oh, Minogue?
490
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,360
- I thought it meant
something else, Sarge.
491
00:21:57,560 --> 00:22:00,600
- OK, guys. Party's over. Let's go.
(ALL GASP, MURMUR)
492
00:22:00,800 --> 00:22:04,840
- Come on. Come on, little lady.
You're going away for a long time.
493
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:08,400
- O'LEARY: So, Avalon and the elders
have been taken into custody.
494
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:10,240
- We've since
found out that Sgt Maaka
495
00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:11,840
was fully aware of the situation.
496
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:14,640
He'd actually been surveilling
the area for the last few hours.
497
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:16,480
- Yeah, so we were safer than
we thought. Unfortunately,
498
00:22:16,680 --> 00:22:19,000
what we thought was that we were
gonna die horrific deaths.
499
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:22,520
Um, so, that was another
uncomfortable work situation.
500
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:25,880
Thanks, Sarge. Job well done.
- What are you guys doing
501
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:28,240
with those?
- Uh, found them in the forest.
502
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:30,440
- We thought they were you,
so we started talking to them.
503
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:32,160
- It was pretty dark, to be honest.
504
00:22:32,360 --> 00:22:34,080
- And then we thought
if anything happened to you guys,
505
00:22:34,280 --> 00:22:35,880
these guys would be
a good substitute.
506
00:22:36,080 --> 00:22:37,350
- Yeah.
- Same vibes.
507
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:40,680
- Yeah, this O'Leary one looks
a lot like her, don't you think?
508
00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:42,850
- It's actually a bit insulting.
509
00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:46,080
- These chocolates
are a cold comfort.
38713
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