All language subtitles for Pants On Fire (2014)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:18,184 --> 00:00:19,385 TRUST ME, BOYS. 2 00:00:19,419 --> 00:00:22,588 NO ONE ELSE WILL THINK TO MEET DANNY KOSTAS BEFORE SCHOOL. 3 00:00:25,524 --> 00:00:27,193 WHOA. 4 00:00:29,394 --> 00:00:31,230 NO ONE? HALF THE TOWN IS HERE. 5 00:00:31,263 --> 00:00:32,664 YES! BUT... 6 00:00:32,698 --> 00:00:34,167 HALF THE TOWN ISN'T. 7 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:37,070 JACK OUTSMARTED HALF THE TOWN. 8 00:00:37,103 --> 00:00:38,338 MM-HMM. 9 00:00:40,805 --> 00:00:43,175 I PROMISED YOU GUYS AUTOGRAPHS, 10 00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:45,812 AND WE ARE GONNA GET AUTOGRAPHS. 11 00:00:45,844 --> 00:00:47,814 I HAVE A PLAN. 12 00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:55,421 OH! HEY. 13 00:00:55,454 --> 00:00:57,457 NO ONE'S ALLOWED BACK HERE. 14 00:00:57,490 --> 00:00:59,225 OH, THANK GOODNESS! A SECURITY GUARD. 15 00:00:59,258 --> 00:01:00,426 MOM ALWAYS SAID, 16 00:01:00,459 --> 00:01:02,428 "IF YOU NEED HELP, FIND A SECURITY GUARD." 17 00:01:02,460 --> 00:01:06,566 WELL, YOUR MOM SOUNDS LIKE A VERY WISE LADY. 18 00:01:06,599 --> 00:01:07,867 WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE TROUBLE? 19 00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:09,635 YEAH, WHAT SEEMS TO BE THE TROUBLE? 20 00:01:09,668 --> 00:01:11,337 IT'S BEARS. 21 00:01:11,370 --> 00:01:12,838 - BEARS? - BEARS! 22 00:01:12,871 --> 00:01:14,272 NOT BEARS. I'M TERRIFIED OF BEARS. 23 00:01:14,305 --> 00:01:16,475 BEARS ARE THE WORST. 24 00:01:17,742 --> 00:01:19,878 WHY WOULD THERE BE BEARS AT A CONVENTION CENTER? 25 00:01:19,912 --> 00:01:21,347 IT'S THE DROUGHT. 26 00:01:21,379 --> 00:01:22,814 THEY'RE COMING DOWN FROM THE MOUNTAINS. 27 00:01:22,847 --> 00:01:24,082 THEY'RE FORAGING FOR FOOD. 28 00:01:24,115 --> 00:01:26,319 - MM-HMM. I-I-IN THE DUMPSTER. - ON TOP OF THE PARKING GARAGE. 29 00:01:26,352 --> 00:01:28,353 FURTHER DOWN THE ALLEY. 30 00:01:28,387 --> 00:01:31,189 WHEN YOU IRONED ON THAT SECURITY BADGE, 31 00:01:31,222 --> 00:01:32,358 YOU SWORE AN OATH 32 00:01:32,391 --> 00:01:34,627 TO PROTECT THIS CONVENTION CENTER. 33 00:01:34,659 --> 00:01:36,361 WELL, TODAY... 34 00:01:36,394 --> 00:01:38,230 YOUR CONVENTION CENTER NEEDS YOU. 35 00:01:38,263 --> 00:01:39,231 WE NEED A HERO! 36 00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:40,400 WE NEED... 37 00:01:41,599 --> 00:01:43,536 OTIS. 38 00:01:44,503 --> 00:01:46,171 ARE YOU SURE IT WAS BEARS? 39 00:01:46,204 --> 00:01:47,906 OH, OTIS... 40 00:01:47,939 --> 00:01:49,308 OTIS! 41 00:01:52,477 --> 00:01:54,881 WOULD I LIE TO YOU? 42 00:01:56,182 --> 00:01:57,584 YOU KIDS STAY HERE. 43 00:02:06,959 --> 00:02:09,295 IT'S BEAR SEASON. 44 00:02:18,637 --> 00:02:20,272 NOW WE JUST HAVE TO SIT BACK, RELAX, 45 00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:22,342 AND WAIT FOR DANNY KOSTAS TO ROLL IN. 46 00:02:23,908 --> 00:02:25,243 HEH. 47 00:02:25,276 --> 00:02:26,778 OKAY. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING. 48 00:02:26,812 --> 00:02:29,814 "I CAN'T BELIEVE OTIS JUST FELL FOR THAT," RIGHT? 49 00:02:29,848 --> 00:02:31,517 WELL, NOW, DON'T BLAME HIM, 50 00:02:31,550 --> 00:02:33,953 BECAUSE HE NEVER REALLY HAD A CHANCE. 51 00:02:33,985 --> 00:02:36,822 SEE, EVERYBODY HAS A SPECIAL TALENT. 52 00:02:36,854 --> 00:02:39,358 SOME PEOPLE ARE... ATHLETES. 53 00:02:40,459 --> 00:02:41,627 AND SOME PEOPLE CAN 54 00:02:41,659 --> 00:02:43,862 PUT THEIR ENTIRE FIST IN THEIR MOUTH. 55 00:02:45,563 --> 00:02:46,665 SORT OF. 56 00:02:46,699 --> 00:02:47,967 BUT ME? 57 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:49,634 MY SPECIAL TALENT? 58 00:02:49,668 --> 00:02:51,437 I CAN LIE. 59 00:02:51,469 --> 00:02:52,837 NOW, EVER SINCE I WAS A LITTLE KID, 60 00:02:52,871 --> 00:02:55,707 I WAS JUST ALWAYS REALLY GOOD AT MAKING STUFF UP. 61 00:02:55,741 --> 00:02:59,445 I FIGURED, REGULAR LIFE IS BORING ENOUGH ON ITS OWN. 62 00:02:59,478 --> 00:03:01,581 WHY NOT SPICE IT UP A LITTLE, HUH? 63 00:03:08,287 --> 00:03:10,456 LIKE THE TIME I BUSTED MY ARM 64 00:03:10,489 --> 00:03:13,558 WHEN I BLEW THE LANDING ON THE SICKEST FLIP OF MY LIFE. 65 00:03:13,592 --> 00:03:14,594 GAH! 66 00:03:15,762 --> 00:03:18,931 NOW, I COULDN'T TELL MY MOM HOW IT REALLY HAPPENED. 67 00:03:18,963 --> 00:03:20,466 SHE SAID ONE MORE ACCIDENT 68 00:03:20,498 --> 00:03:22,734 AND MY BIKE WOULD BE HISTORY. 69 00:03:22,768 --> 00:03:24,402 SO MAYBE... 70 00:03:24,436 --> 00:03:26,605 SO MAYBE MY ARM GOT BROKEN 71 00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:29,542 PROTECTING THE HABITAT OF AN ENDANGERED OWL 72 00:03:29,574 --> 00:03:30,976 FROM TWO TREE-HUNGRY LUMBERJACKS. 73 00:03:34,346 --> 00:03:36,915 GET 'IM! 74 00:03:41,052 --> 00:03:42,687 OH! 75 00:03:42,721 --> 00:03:43,855 YOU! 76 00:03:43,889 --> 00:03:44,957 OH! 77 00:03:44,990 --> 00:03:47,393 AHH! 78 00:03:52,364 --> 00:03:54,533 JACK PARKER, THAT'S WHO. 79 00:03:57,368 --> 00:03:58,670 AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW? 80 00:03:58,704 --> 00:04:02,408 I GOT TO KEEP MY BIKE AND I MADE MY PARENTS PROUD. 81 00:04:02,441 --> 00:04:03,876 NOW, MAYBE I DIDN'T HAVE THE NERVE 82 00:04:03,908 --> 00:04:06,679 TO ASK JENNIFER TO THE WINTER FORMAL. 83 00:04:07,812 --> 00:04:08,913 HI, JACK. 84 00:04:08,947 --> 00:04:11,884 OR ASK HER ANYTHING AT ALL. 85 00:04:12,985 --> 00:04:16,521 OR MAYBE I HAD A SMOKIN'-HOT GIRLFRIEND FROM ARIZONA 86 00:04:16,555 --> 00:04:18,958 WHO DIDN'T WANT ME GOING OUT WITH ANYONE ELSE. 87 00:04:24,997 --> 00:04:28,067 SHE'S SUPER-POSSESSIVE. 88 00:04:28,100 --> 00:04:29,735 MAYBE I WENT OVERBOARD ON THAT LIE. 89 00:04:29,767 --> 00:04:31,336 BUT... 90 00:04:31,370 --> 00:04:32,405 MY BEST LIE, 91 00:04:32,437 --> 00:04:35,675 MY GREATEST FABRICATION OF ALL, 92 00:04:35,708 --> 00:04:37,475 WAS MIKEY. 93 00:04:37,509 --> 00:04:39,912 SEE, MY BELOVED RED SOX WERE IN TOWN, 94 00:04:39,944 --> 00:04:41,413 AND RYAN, ERIC, AND I 95 00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:44,583 HAD SCORED AWESOME SEATS RIGHT BEHIND HOME PLATE. 96 00:04:44,615 --> 00:04:46,818 THE ONLY PROBLEM WAS, 97 00:04:46,851 --> 00:04:49,755 I HADN'T CLEANED MY ROOM IN EIGHT MONTHS. 98 00:04:51,824 --> 00:04:52,959 YOUNG MAN, 99 00:04:52,992 --> 00:04:55,728 YOU ARE NOT GOING ANYWHERE UNTIL THIS ROOM IS SPOTLESS. 100 00:04:55,761 --> 00:04:56,962 BUT... MOM! 101 00:04:58,129 --> 00:05:00,832 I... HAVE TO... 102 00:05:00,865 --> 00:05:03,101 HELP... THAT KID. 103 00:05:03,134 --> 00:05:05,103 - WHAT KID? - THAT KID THAT... 104 00:05:05,137 --> 00:05:06,971 I TUTOR? 105 00:05:07,004 --> 00:05:09,908 MOM, I SWEAR, YOU DON'T LISTEN TO A THING I SAY. 106 00:05:09,942 --> 00:05:10,942 YOU TUTOR SOMEONE? 107 00:05:10,975 --> 00:05:12,745 YEAH, IT'S QUITE WONDERFUL. 108 00:05:12,778 --> 00:05:15,348 I, YOU KNOW, I TRY NOT TO MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF IT. 109 00:05:15,380 --> 00:05:17,549 YOU KNOW, JUST DOING MY PART. 110 00:05:17,583 --> 00:05:18,984 HELPING A KID-- 111 00:05:19,016 --> 00:05:20,052 WHAT'S THIS KID'S NAME? 112 00:05:20,084 --> 00:05:21,553 UH, MIKE. 113 00:05:21,586 --> 00:05:24,122 BUT I CALL HIM MIKEY, YOU KNOW? 114 00:05:24,156 --> 00:05:25,990 WE'RE KINDA TIGHT LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW? 115 00:05:26,024 --> 00:05:28,060 I'M KIND OF HIS ONLY FRIEND. 116 00:05:28,093 --> 00:05:30,730 I AM SO... 117 00:05:33,564 --> 00:05:34,800 PROUD OF YOU! 118 00:05:36,435 --> 00:05:37,903 YOU JUST GO. 119 00:05:37,935 --> 00:05:40,639 HELP THAT MIKEY, OKAY? 120 00:05:46,911 --> 00:05:48,813 SEE WHAT I MEAN? 121 00:05:48,846 --> 00:05:52,016 COUPLE OF HARMLESS FABRICATIONS AND... 122 00:05:52,050 --> 00:05:55,922 JUST LIKE THAT, THINGS JUST GET INTERESTING. 123 00:05:57,021 --> 00:05:58,891 ERIC? 124 00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:00,024 WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 125 00:06:00,057 --> 00:06:01,493 SHH! 126 00:06:01,526 --> 00:06:04,462 THE BEST DEFENSE AGAINST BEARS IS TO PLAY DEAD. 127 00:06:04,495 --> 00:06:06,031 GET UP. COME ON. 128 00:06:06,064 --> 00:06:07,433 THERE WE GO. 129 00:06:07,466 --> 00:06:09,701 OKAY. 130 00:06:31,689 --> 00:06:33,692 DANNY! DANNY! WE LOVE YOU, MAN. 131 00:06:33,725 --> 00:06:35,561 MY BOY, RYAN, DOES A PERFECT IMPRESSION 132 00:06:35,593 --> 00:06:37,062 OF YOUR BATTING RITUAL. : SHOW HIM! 133 00:06:37,095 --> 00:06:38,131 OKAY. 134 00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:50,810 CAN WE GET SOME AUTOGRAPHS? 135 00:07:00,218 --> 00:07:02,555 AWESOME! 136 00:07:02,588 --> 00:07:04,590 SO COOL! 137 00:07:06,725 --> 00:07:08,227 MM! TASTES MINTY. 138 00:07:08,259 --> 00:07:09,928 AW, WE GOTTA GO! 139 00:07:09,961 --> 00:07:12,764 MS. TAYLOR IS GOING TO KILL YOU. 140 00:07:12,798 --> 00:07:14,199 OKAY, AND ONE MORE THING. 141 00:07:14,233 --> 00:07:16,134 YES. LYING IS WRONG. 142 00:07:16,168 --> 00:07:18,637 EXCEPT... MAYBE IT ISN'T. 143 00:07:18,670 --> 00:07:19,605 NOW HEAR ME OUT. 144 00:07:19,637 --> 00:07:20,605 RIGHT NOW, 145 00:07:20,639 --> 00:07:22,775 OTIS THE SECURITY GUARD THINKS HE'S A HERO. 146 00:07:22,807 --> 00:07:25,510 AND... WE GOT OUR AUTOGRAPHS. 147 00:07:25,543 --> 00:07:26,945 EVERYBODY WINS. 148 00:07:26,978 --> 00:07:28,680 NO HARM, NO FOUL. 149 00:07:28,713 --> 00:07:31,584 FAKE GIRLFRIEND? LUMBERJACKS? CHECK. 150 00:07:31,617 --> 00:07:32,785 BUT THE "MIKEY" STORY, 151 00:07:32,817 --> 00:07:34,620 THAT WAS A MASTERPIECE, 152 00:07:34,653 --> 00:07:36,889 AND IT TOTALLY CHANGED MY LIFE. 153 00:07:38,089 --> 00:07:41,593 MIKEY BECAME MY GO-TO EXCUSE FOR EVERY SITUATION. 154 00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:44,062 YOU KNOW-- GETTING OUT OF CHORES, 155 00:07:44,096 --> 00:07:45,598 BREAKING CURFEW, 156 00:07:45,630 --> 00:07:47,131 BEING LATE FOR CLASS. 157 00:07:47,165 --> 00:07:49,835 PEOPLE WERE HAPPY LETTING ME GET AWAY WITH THINGS, 158 00:07:49,867 --> 00:07:51,603 BECAUSE THEY WERE HELPING MIKEY. 159 00:07:51,637 --> 00:07:53,172 IT MADE THEM FEEL GOOD, 160 00:07:53,204 --> 00:07:57,141 AND MAKING PEOPLE FEEL GOOD CAN'T BE BAD, RIGHT? 161 00:08:02,213 --> 00:08:05,250 JACK PARKER, YOU'RE LATE. 162 00:08:05,283 --> 00:08:06,885 IT'S THE THIRD TIME THIS WEEK. 163 00:08:06,918 --> 00:08:08,920 I'M GONNA HAVE TO GIVE YOU DETENTION. 164 00:08:08,954 --> 00:08:11,189 I UNDERSTAND. 165 00:08:15,259 --> 00:08:16,795 IS EVERYTHING OKAY? 166 00:08:16,827 --> 00:08:19,531 IT'S JUST... 167 00:08:19,564 --> 00:08:22,767 I WAS UP ALL NIGHT HELPING MIKEY. 168 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:25,271 WITH MATH, HE'S JUST REALLY STRUGGLING, 169 00:08:25,303 --> 00:08:26,804 AND HE WANTS TO GET INTO COLLEGE, 170 00:08:26,838 --> 00:08:30,643 SO HE CAN MAKE HIS MOM AND HIS FOUR BROTHERS PROUD. 171 00:08:30,675 --> 00:08:32,278 I THOUGHT YOU SAID HE HAD FIVE BROTHERS. 172 00:08:34,613 --> 00:08:36,315 IT'S FOUR. 173 00:08:36,347 --> 00:08:37,649 IT'S FOUR NOW. 174 00:08:37,682 --> 00:08:39,851 OHH... 175 00:08:41,119 --> 00:08:44,990 HOW ABOUT WE JUST FORGET ABOUT DETENTION FOR TODAY? HMM? 176 00:08:46,091 --> 00:08:48,159 THANK YOU. 177 00:08:48,192 --> 00:08:50,795 IT'S LIKE I ALWAYS TOLD MIKEY, MS. TAYLOR-- 178 00:08:50,828 --> 00:08:54,299 YOU ARE THE TYPE OF TEACHER THAT THEY MAKE MOVIES ABOUT. 179 00:09:06,611 --> 00:09:08,747 HEY! 180 00:09:10,282 --> 00:09:12,718 SEE? I GET OUT OF DETENTION, 181 00:09:12,750 --> 00:09:14,886 AND MS. TAYLOR FEELS GREAT ABOUT HERSELF! 182 00:09:14,919 --> 00:09:17,088 MY LIES ARE MAKING OUR SCHOOL-- 183 00:09:17,121 --> 00:09:19,324 NO, OUR WORLD-- 184 00:09:19,357 --> 00:09:21,125 A BETTER PLACE. 185 00:09:22,159 --> 00:09:23,695 COME ON! 186 00:09:23,729 --> 00:09:25,163 - GIVE THEM BACK! - NO! 187 00:09:29,801 --> 00:09:31,903 OH, HEY, LANCE. 188 00:09:31,937 --> 00:09:33,339 ACTS OF INJUSTICE LIKE THAT 189 00:09:33,371 --> 00:09:35,974 REALLY MAKE THE OLD ARM ACHE. 190 00:09:36,008 --> 00:09:38,777 YOU KNOW... WHEN I BROKE IT? 191 00:09:38,809 --> 00:09:40,712 SINGLE-HANDEDLY TAKING DOWN THOSE LUMBERJACKS? 192 00:09:40,745 --> 00:09:42,347 YOU'VE HEARD THE STORY. 193 00:09:42,380 --> 00:09:43,948 YOU SNAPPED THEM LIKE TWIGS. 194 00:09:43,981 --> 00:09:44,783 TWIGS. 195 00:09:44,816 --> 00:09:46,250 OH! OH... UH-- 196 00:09:47,719 --> 00:09:49,021 THERE... 197 00:09:49,053 --> 00:09:50,755 THERE YOU GO. 198 00:09:50,788 --> 00:09:52,758 NICE AND CLEAN, HUH? 199 00:09:57,395 --> 00:09:58,796 THANKS, JACK. 200 00:09:58,830 --> 00:10:00,699 YOU'RE ALWAYS STANDING UP FOR THE LITTLE GUYS. 201 00:10:00,731 --> 00:10:03,201 SPEAKING OF WHICH, GIVE MY BEST TO MIKEY. 202 00:10:03,235 --> 00:10:05,171 I SURE WILL. 203 00:10:06,238 --> 00:10:07,773 WHAT CAN I SAY? 204 00:10:07,806 --> 00:10:10,908 I'M LIKE A... SUPERHERO OR SOMETHING. 205 00:10:10,942 --> 00:10:12,411 JACK PARKER. 206 00:10:12,443 --> 00:10:14,112 THIS IS PRINCIPAL KAR. 207 00:10:14,145 --> 00:10:16,982 REPORT TO MY OFFICE IMMEDIATELY. 208 00:10:21,419 --> 00:10:23,688 MR. PARKER... 209 00:10:23,721 --> 00:10:26,424 I THINK WE NEED TO DISCUSS THIS "MIKEY." 210 00:10:26,457 --> 00:10:28,259 UH... HEH. 211 00:10:28,293 --> 00:10:30,796 UM... WHAT ABOUT MIKEY? 212 00:10:30,828 --> 00:10:32,864 THE TEACHERS' LOUNGE HAS BEEN BUZZING 213 00:10:32,898 --> 00:10:35,834 WITH TALES ABOUT YOU TUTORING A MYSTERIOUS BOY 214 00:10:35,866 --> 00:10:37,201 FROM ANOTHER SCHOOL. 215 00:10:37,235 --> 00:10:38,336 AND I HAVE TO SAY... 216 00:10:40,004 --> 00:10:41,206 I AM 217 00:10:41,239 --> 00:10:43,442 VERY, VERY IMPRESSED. 218 00:10:43,475 --> 00:10:46,979 TAKING TIME OUT OF YOUR BUSY SCHEDULE 219 00:10:47,011 --> 00:10:49,881 TO HELP OTHERS, IT'S... 220 00:10:49,914 --> 00:10:51,949 OH, IT'S MADE US ALL VERY PROUD. 221 00:10:51,982 --> 00:10:55,153 YOU MAY BE WONDERING WHERE THIS IS GOING. 222 00:10:55,187 --> 00:10:57,355 I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE THIS IS GOING. 223 00:10:57,389 --> 00:11:00,359 HE'S GONNA NOMINATE ME FOR "STUDENT OF THE YEAR." 224 00:11:01,493 --> 00:11:03,929 I AM GOING TO NOMINATE YOU-- 225 00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:07,700 YOU! ...FOR "STUDENT OF THE YEAR." 226 00:11:07,732 --> 00:11:09,267 WHAT? 227 00:11:09,301 --> 00:11:11,203 "STUDENT OF THE YEAR!" 228 00:11:11,235 --> 00:11:14,173 I-I-I WAS REALLY NOT EXPECTING THIS. 229 00:11:14,206 --> 00:11:18,110 I MEAN, HELPING MIKEY IS ITS OWN REWARD. 230 00:11:18,143 --> 00:11:20,479 THE WINNER GETS HIS OR HER CHOICE 231 00:11:20,511 --> 00:11:22,947 OF ANY SUMMER INTERNSHIP. 232 00:11:22,980 --> 00:11:26,784 YOU MEAN LIKE THE BAT BOY FOR THE BOSTON RED SOX? 233 00:11:26,817 --> 00:11:28,886 THAT KIND OF INTERNSHIP? 234 00:11:28,919 --> 00:11:30,923 YOU DA MAN! 235 00:11:30,956 --> 00:11:32,457 AND NOW... 236 00:11:32,490 --> 00:11:34,492 FULFILLING HIS LIFE-LONG DREAM, 237 00:11:34,525 --> 00:11:35,927 PUT YOUR HANDS TOGETHER 238 00:11:35,961 --> 00:11:37,962 FOR YOUR HOMETOWN HERO 239 00:11:37,995 --> 00:11:41,466 AND FUTURE ALL-STAR RED SOX BAT BOY... 240 00:11:41,500 --> 00:11:43,969 JACK PARKER-R-R-R! 241 00:11:49,441 --> 00:11:51,210 UH, JACK? 242 00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:53,512 OH! UH... 243 00:11:53,544 --> 00:11:55,346 I MEAN, IF I WERE TO WIN, 244 00:11:55,379 --> 00:11:57,515 THEN THAT'S WHAT I WOULD CHOOSE, YOU KNOW. 245 00:11:57,548 --> 00:11:58,983 BUT-- 246 00:11:59,017 --> 00:12:01,520 IT'S JUST AN HONOR TO BE NOMINATED. 247 00:12:01,552 --> 00:12:05,189 OH, JACK! I AM SO PROUD OF YOU! 248 00:12:05,222 --> 00:12:06,491 OH... 249 00:12:06,524 --> 00:12:09,794 MOM, I LIVE TO MAKE YOU PROUD. 250 00:12:11,196 --> 00:12:13,966 SO, UH, WHY ARE YOU PROUD OF ME? 251 00:12:13,999 --> 00:12:15,399 YOUR PRINCIPAL CALLED. 252 00:12:15,432 --> 00:12:20,304 YOU'RE ONE OF THE FIVE FINALISTS FOR "STUDENT OF THE YEAR"! 253 00:12:20,337 --> 00:12:22,006 OH... THAT. 254 00:12:22,039 --> 00:12:24,909 NEVER WOULD HAVE GUESSED. NEVER. 255 00:12:24,942 --> 00:12:26,511 LIKE, EVER. 256 00:12:26,544 --> 00:12:28,079 NEVER EVER. EVER. 257 00:12:28,113 --> 00:12:29,281 NEVER? 258 00:12:29,313 --> 00:12:30,147 EVER. 259 00:12:30,182 --> 00:12:31,884 YOU HAVE GIVEN SO MUCH TO THAT MIKEY. 260 00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,153 YOU DESERVE THIS AWARD. 261 00:12:34,186 --> 00:12:36,922 AND I KNOW WHERE WE'RE GONNA PUT IT! 262 00:12:38,222 --> 00:12:40,892 RIGHT HERE, SO EVERYONE CAN SEE IT. 263 00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:42,094 YOU KNOW WHAT? 264 00:12:42,126 --> 00:12:43,995 MAYBE I DO DESERVE IT. 265 00:12:44,028 --> 00:12:46,030 SPEAKING OF DOING SOMETHING GOOD-- 266 00:12:46,063 --> 00:12:47,331 I NEED ONE OF YOU 267 00:12:47,365 --> 00:12:49,567 TO HELP ME CLEAN OUT THE GARAGE TODAY. 268 00:12:49,600 --> 00:12:51,470 I THINK A POSSUM DIED IN THERE. 269 00:12:51,503 --> 00:12:53,105 PLACE IS GETTING PRETTY RIPE. 270 00:12:53,138 --> 00:12:54,239 WELL, I CAN'T DO IT. NICK'S TAKING ME TO DINNER 271 00:12:54,273 --> 00:12:57,942 AT THE WIENER PALACE FOR OUR THREE-WEEK ANNIVERSARY. 272 00:12:57,975 --> 00:12:59,043 HOW 'BOUT IT, SPORT? 273 00:12:59,076 --> 00:13:01,312 OH, DAD, YOU KNOW THAT I WOULD LOVE 274 00:13:01,346 --> 00:13:03,215 TO SPEND SOME QUALITY BONDING TIME 275 00:13:03,248 --> 00:13:06,985 SEARCHING FOR A ROTTING MARSUPIAL CORPSE WITH YOU. 276 00:13:07,018 --> 00:13:08,220 YOU KNOW I WOULD! 277 00:13:08,253 --> 00:13:10,254 BUT MIKEY HAS A CHEM TEST, 278 00:13:10,288 --> 00:13:12,291 AND I PROMISED HIM THAT WE'D STUDY. 279 00:13:12,323 --> 00:13:15,026 YOU HELP THAT MIKEY. HE NEEDS YOU. 280 00:13:15,059 --> 00:13:16,261 HANNAH CAN HELP YOUR FATHER. 281 00:13:17,461 --> 00:13:19,063 BUT MY ANNIVERSARY-- 282 00:13:19,096 --> 00:13:21,866 SWEETIE, THREE WEEKS IS NOT AN ANNIVERSARY. 283 00:13:21,899 --> 00:13:23,999 BUT-- 284 00:13:23,033 --> 00:13:26,270 HANNAH, YOU ARE THE BEST. 285 00:13:26,303 --> 00:13:28,240 PEOPLE LIKE YOU ARE THE REASON 286 00:13:28,273 --> 00:13:31,210 THAT PEOPLE LIKE ME GET NOMINATED FOR AWARDS. 287 00:13:31,243 --> 00:13:33,445 THANK YOU. 288 00:13:45,023 --> 00:13:46,959 AH. OKAY. 289 00:13:46,991 --> 00:13:50,428 RIGHT! LOOKING GOOD, SIS. 290 00:13:51,663 --> 00:13:53,398 BROTHERS. 291 00:13:53,431 --> 00:13:54,633 HAPPY HUNTING. 292 00:13:54,666 --> 00:13:56,301 ALRIGHT, SWEETHEART. 293 00:13:56,333 --> 00:13:59,103 IF YOU FIND THE POSSUM AND IT ISN'T MOVING, 294 00:13:59,136 --> 00:14:01,239 IT COULD JUST BE PLAYING POSSUM. 295 00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:02,507 OR IT'S DEAD FROM RABIES. 296 00:14:02,539 --> 00:14:03,641 GROSS. 297 00:14:03,674 --> 00:14:04,642 EITHER WAY, 298 00:14:04,676 --> 00:14:05,978 DON'T TOUCH IT. 299 00:14:06,010 --> 00:14:08,213 USE THIS POSSUM CLUB. 300 00:14:16,553 --> 00:14:17,990 EW, I THINK I FOUND IT! 301 00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:18,990 GET THE TRASH BAG! 302 00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:20,591 OH, IT'S ALIVE! 303 00:14:20,625 --> 00:14:22,660 IT'S ALIVE AND I THINK IT HATES ME! 304 00:14:22,693 --> 00:14:24,929 USE THE CLUB! USE THE POSSUM CLUB! 305 00:14:24,962 --> 00:14:27,265 IT'S A BROOM, DAD! 306 00:14:33,404 --> 00:14:34,273 LOOK, YOUR SHOW 307 00:14:34,306 --> 00:14:36,375 IS THE NUMBER-ONE WEEKLY ANNOUNCEMENT SHOW 308 00:14:36,408 --> 00:14:37,209 IN THIS SCHOOL-- 309 00:14:37,241 --> 00:14:38,976 IT'S THE ONLY WEEKLY ANNOUNCEMENT SHOW 310 00:14:39,009 --> 00:14:40,011 IN THIS SCHOOL. 311 00:14:40,044 --> 00:14:41,479 IT'S STILL NUMBER ONE! 312 00:14:41,513 --> 00:14:42,980 OKAY? POINT IS-- 313 00:14:43,014 --> 00:14:46,384 I TELL ONE MORE KILLER MIKEY STORY ON AIR, 314 00:14:46,418 --> 00:14:49,187 AND I HAVE THAT "STUDENT OF THE YEAR" AWARD LOCKED. 315 00:14:49,220 --> 00:14:51,223 YEAH, BUT TELLING EVERYONE YOU HELD A BOTTLE DRIVE 316 00:14:51,255 --> 00:14:53,091 TO RAISE MONEY TO BUY A BIONIC TAIL 317 00:14:53,124 --> 00:14:55,293 TO SAVE MIKEY'S SICK DOG? 318 00:14:55,326 --> 00:14:56,662 I MEAN, MAYBE YOU'RE GOING TOO BIG. 319 00:14:56,695 --> 00:14:58,697 NO, THIS IS THE TIME TO GO BIG. 320 00:14:58,730 --> 00:15:01,700 IT'S THE BOTTOM OF THE NINTH. I GOTTA SWING FOR THE FENCES. 321 00:15:01,732 --> 00:15:03,167 MAYBE I SHOULD GO BIGGER. 322 00:15:03,201 --> 00:15:05,170 WHAT IF... 323 00:15:05,202 --> 00:15:07,172 ITS TAIL SHOOTS LASERS? 324 00:15:07,205 --> 00:15:09,174 THAT'D BE AWESOME. 325 00:15:10,140 --> 00:15:11,142 A LITTLE TOO BIG, BUDDY. 326 00:15:11,176 --> 00:15:13,378 BUT I LIKE WHERE YOUR HEAD'S AT. 327 00:15:13,410 --> 00:15:15,313 I'M STICKING WITH THE REGULAR BIONIC TAIL. 328 00:15:15,346 --> 00:15:17,081 I'M INSPIRED JUST THINKING OF IT. 329 00:15:20,485 --> 00:15:21,486 HEY, JACK. 330 00:15:23,488 --> 00:15:25,557 OH, HI! UH-- 331 00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:27,024 JEN... 332 00:15:27,057 --> 00:15:28,592 ...NIFER. 333 00:15:28,625 --> 00:15:30,028 HOW'S, EH...? 334 00:15:30,061 --> 00:15:32,064 HI. 335 00:15:32,096 --> 00:15:34,031 YOU CAN'T TALK TO HER. 336 00:15:34,065 --> 00:15:35,233 OH. NO, REALLY? 337 00:15:35,265 --> 00:15:37,201 THANKS FOR RUBBING IT IN. I'M DYING HERE! 338 00:15:37,235 --> 00:15:39,604 NO, I MEAN, YOU CAN'T TALK TO HER. 339 00:15:39,636 --> 00:15:40,972 LISA WILL FREAK OUT! 340 00:15:41,005 --> 00:15:42,274 LISA? 341 00:15:42,307 --> 00:15:45,711 YOUR SUPER-POSSESSIVE GIRLFRIEND FROM ARIZONA? 342 00:15:45,744 --> 00:15:48,113 OH. OH, RIGHT. 343 00:15:48,145 --> 00:15:50,115 OKAY, I'LL GET RID OF HER, 344 00:15:50,148 --> 00:15:51,615 AND THEN I'LL MEET YOU IN THE STUDIO. 345 00:15:51,649 --> 00:15:53,085 OKAY. 346 00:15:53,118 --> 00:15:56,455 HEY, LISTEN, I JUST WANTED TO CONGRATULATE YOU 347 00:15:56,488 --> 00:15:58,490 ON THE WHOLE STUDENT OF THE YEAR NOMINATION. 348 00:15:58,523 --> 00:16:00,558 IT'S SO COOL WHAT YOU'VE BEEN DOING FOR MIKEY. 349 00:16:00,591 --> 00:16:02,760 THANKS. HEH. YOU. 350 00:16:02,793 --> 00:16:05,062 NO, THANK-- THANK YOU 351 00:16:05,096 --> 00:16:07,099 IS WHAT I MEANT TO SAY. 352 00:16:07,131 --> 00:16:08,766 OH, BOY. UH... LISTEN, I'M SORRY. 353 00:16:08,799 --> 00:16:10,201 I'M REALLY NERVOUS. 354 00:16:10,235 --> 00:16:11,536 I DON'T LIKE ALL THIS ATTENTION. 355 00:16:11,568 --> 00:16:12,603 YEAH. 356 00:16:12,636 --> 00:16:14,138 I'M THAT WAY, TOO. 357 00:16:16,173 --> 00:16:19,010 UM, SO CAITLIN IS HAVING A POOL PARTY THIS WEEKEND, 358 00:16:19,043 --> 00:16:21,145 AND I WAS THINKING... 359 00:16:21,178 --> 00:16:24,048 MAYBE YOU, RYAN AND ERIC MIGHT WANT TO COME TO IT? 360 00:16:24,081 --> 00:16:25,417 S-SERIOUSLY? 361 00:16:26,750 --> 00:16:29,254 I MEAN, UH, SERIOUSLY? 362 00:16:29,287 --> 00:16:32,691 CAITLIN HAS A-- HAS A POOL IN THIS CLIMATE? 363 00:16:32,724 --> 00:16:34,225 THAT'S AN AWFUL LOT OF WORK. 364 00:16:34,259 --> 00:16:36,461 YOU GOTTA GOTTA DRAIN IT IN THE WINTER. 365 00:16:37,695 --> 00:16:41,767 BUT YEAH, NO, NO THAT'D BE FUN. WE COULD TOTALLY POOL PARTY. 366 00:16:43,201 --> 00:16:44,635 COOL. WELL, UH... 367 00:16:44,668 --> 00:16:46,337 GOOD LUCK IN THERE. 368 00:16:46,370 --> 00:16:47,773 THANKS. 369 00:16:47,806 --> 00:16:49,307 HEY! 370 00:16:49,340 --> 00:16:50,609 YOU SHOULD BRING MIKEY. 371 00:16:50,642 --> 00:16:52,210 YOU KNOW, I'D LOVE TO FINALLY MEET HIM. 372 00:16:52,243 --> 00:16:53,778 TOTALLY! YEAH! 373 00:16:53,812 --> 00:16:55,580 OH... 374 00:16:55,613 --> 00:16:58,683 HE'S TAKING HIS DOG IN FOR A SOFTWARE UPDATE THAT DAY. 375 00:16:58,716 --> 00:17:00,552 SOFTWARE UPDATE? 376 00:17:00,585 --> 00:17:01,586 YOU'LL SEE. 377 00:17:01,619 --> 00:17:03,721 BYE. 378 00:17:07,325 --> 00:17:09,126 SO, IN CONCLUSION, 379 00:17:09,160 --> 00:17:12,096 BASED ON MY EXEMPLARY ACADEMIC PERFORMANCE, 380 00:17:12,130 --> 00:17:13,698 PERFECT ATTENDANCE, 381 00:17:13,730 --> 00:17:15,500 AND MY POSITION 382 00:17:15,532 --> 00:17:18,803 AS ASSISTANT MANAGER OF THE JUNIOR VARSITY SWIM TEAM, 383 00:17:18,836 --> 00:17:22,173 I BELIEVE I SHOULD BE YOUR STUDENT OF THE YEAR. 384 00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:23,842 THANK YOU. 385 00:17:27,311 --> 00:17:28,712 THANK YOU, STEPHANIE. 386 00:17:28,746 --> 00:17:31,650 THAT WAS A LONG LIST OF THINGS YOU JUST READ. 387 00:17:35,619 --> 00:17:36,787 AND NOW... 388 00:17:36,820 --> 00:17:41,125 IT GIVES ME GREAT PLEASURE TO CALL UP OUR FINAL NOMINEE-- 389 00:17:44,194 --> 00:17:46,397 JACK PARKER! 390 00:17:46,431 --> 00:17:48,366 HEY! 391 00:17:49,299 --> 00:17:51,336 OH! HEY-- 392 00:17:53,671 --> 00:17:55,574 PRINCIPAL KAR. 393 00:17:55,606 --> 00:17:58,376 ESTEEMED TEACHERS, FELLOW STUDENTS... 394 00:17:59,376 --> 00:18:00,846 DO I DESERVE STUDENT OF THE YEAR? 395 00:18:02,180 --> 00:18:03,315 THAT'S NOT FOR ME TO DECIDE. 396 00:18:03,347 --> 00:18:04,415 WHAT I DO KNOW IS, 397 00:18:04,449 --> 00:18:06,151 STUDENT OF THE YEAR 398 00:18:06,183 --> 00:18:08,220 WAS THE FURTHEST THING FROM MY MIND 399 00:18:08,252 --> 00:18:10,387 THE DAY I FINALLY RAISED ENOUGH MONEY 400 00:18:10,421 --> 00:18:13,525 TO BUY MIKEY'S POOR, SICK DOG A ROBOT TAIL. 401 00:18:15,692 --> 00:18:17,162 YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN THE LITTLE GUY... 402 00:18:17,194 --> 00:18:18,195 WAGGING THAT THING. 403 00:18:18,229 --> 00:18:19,364 I MEAN, HE ALMOST TOOK OFF. 404 00:18:19,396 --> 00:18:21,566 THIS MAN IS AN ARTIST. 405 00:18:21,598 --> 00:18:22,533 I MAY NOT HAVE 406 00:18:22,567 --> 00:18:24,702 THE BEST GRADES OR THE PERFECT ATTENDANCE, 407 00:18:24,736 --> 00:18:27,639 BUT I'M THE TYPE OF GUY THAT'LL RAISE MONEY 408 00:18:27,672 --> 00:18:31,543 TO BRING A POOR, SICK DOG'S BUTT INTO THE 21ST CENTURY. 409 00:18:33,243 --> 00:18:35,312 I JUST WISH... 410 00:18:35,346 --> 00:18:38,750 I WISH MIKEY COULD BE HERE RIGHT NOW. 411 00:18:38,782 --> 00:18:43,187 IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH FOR ME TO SHARE THIS MOMENT WITH HIM. 412 00:18:44,556 --> 00:18:47,325 IF HE WERE HERE RIGHT NOW, I WOULD TELL HIM-- 413 00:18:47,357 --> 00:18:49,494 : TELL ME WHAT, JACK? 414 00:18:52,829 --> 00:18:54,798 WHO SAID THAT? 415 00:18:54,832 --> 00:18:56,802 : IT'S ME! 416 00:18:59,304 --> 00:19:00,705 MIKEY! 417 00:19:04,842 --> 00:19:05,810 MIKEY? 418 00:19:05,843 --> 00:19:06,845 NO! 419 00:19:07,945 --> 00:19:09,413 MIKEY! 420 00:19:09,446 --> 00:19:11,782 HEY, EVERYBODY, IT'S MIKEY! 421 00:19:12,849 --> 00:19:15,653 UH-H-H-H... 422 00:19:15,686 --> 00:19:17,688 W-- YOU'RE HERE. 423 00:19:17,721 --> 00:19:18,889 'COURSE I'M HERE! 424 00:19:18,923 --> 00:19:21,792 I'M NOT GONNA MISS MY GOOD FRIEND'S SPECIAL DAY. NO WAY! 425 00:19:21,826 --> 00:19:22,861 HOW ABOUT 426 00:19:22,894 --> 00:19:23,894 THIS GUY? 427 00:19:23,928 --> 00:19:25,263 ISN'T HE THE GREATEST? 428 00:19:40,244 --> 00:19:41,346 OKAY! 429 00:19:42,346 --> 00:19:43,981 WHO ARE YOU? 430 00:19:44,015 --> 00:19:45,250 I'M MIKEY! 431 00:19:45,282 --> 00:19:48,285 NO. NO, NO, NO. NO, NO. NO. NO. 432 00:19:48,318 --> 00:19:50,622 YES. YES, YES, YES. YES, YES. YES, YES. 433 00:19:50,654 --> 00:19:51,489 YES. 434 00:19:51,521 --> 00:19:52,790 THA-- THAT CAN'T BE. 435 00:19:52,824 --> 00:19:55,759 I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU BEFORE IN MY LIFE. 436 00:19:55,792 --> 00:19:57,328 OF COURSE YOU HAVE. 437 00:19:57,362 --> 00:19:59,498 JUST CHECK US OUT ON "FACES AND FRIENDS." 438 00:20:01,332 --> 00:20:02,501 WHA-- 439 00:20:04,035 --> 00:20:05,003 NO. OKAY, IT CAN'T BE. 440 00:20:05,036 --> 00:20:06,837 IT SURE CAN. 441 00:20:06,871 --> 00:20:07,973 DUDE! 442 00:20:08,006 --> 00:20:09,608 OH... DUDE. 443 00:20:09,641 --> 00:20:12,444 I'M SURE I HAVE YOU TO THANK FOR THIS LITTLE PRANK. 444 00:20:12,477 --> 00:20:13,979 ME? NO. I DON'T HAVE THE LEVEL OF COMMITMENT 445 00:20:14,011 --> 00:20:15,579 TO TAKE ON SOMETHING LIKE THIS. 446 00:20:15,613 --> 00:20:16,815 AND I THINK IT'S A STEP ABOVE 447 00:20:16,847 --> 00:20:19,317 ERIC'S CAPACITY FOR PLANNING AND EXECUTION. 448 00:20:19,349 --> 00:20:21,752 IS HE REAL? 449 00:20:21,786 --> 00:20:23,020 AM I REAL? 450 00:20:23,054 --> 00:20:24,456 IS ANYTHING REAL? 451 00:20:24,489 --> 00:20:26,357 YOU MUST BE RYAN. 452 00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:28,493 JACK'S TRIED-AND-TRUE BEST FRIEND. 453 00:20:28,526 --> 00:20:29,494 THE KIND OF GUY THAT'D GIVE YOU 454 00:20:29,527 --> 00:20:30,694 THE UNDERWEAR OFF HIS BUTT 455 00:20:30,728 --> 00:20:31,528 IF YOU NEEDED 'EM. 456 00:20:31,561 --> 00:20:32,963 AW, DUDE! YOU TOLD HIM ABOUT THAT? 457 00:20:32,997 --> 00:20:34,032 THAT WAS A SECRET. 458 00:20:34,065 --> 00:20:35,267 IT IS A SECRET! 459 00:20:35,299 --> 00:20:37,501 WELL, OBVIOUSLY, IT ISN'T! 460 00:20:38,536 --> 00:20:40,372 I THOUGHT YOU MADE MIKEY UP! 461 00:20:40,404 --> 00:20:41,538 I DID MAKE HIM UP. 462 00:20:41,571 --> 00:20:43,674 WELL, THEN WHO'S TALKING TO ERIC OVER THERE? 463 00:20:44,842 --> 00:20:46,711 A QUARTER? 464 00:20:46,743 --> 00:20:49,547 CHECK THE OTHER EAR. CHECK THE OTHER EAR! 465 00:20:49,579 --> 00:20:51,750 LOVIN' ME SOME ERIC. 466 00:20:51,782 --> 00:20:54,418 I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET JEN AND ALL YOUR OTHER FRIENDS! 467 00:20:54,451 --> 00:20:55,753 MAN. 468 00:20:55,787 --> 00:20:57,389 IF HE STARTS TALKING TO EVERYONE, 469 00:20:57,422 --> 00:20:58,957 I WON'T WIN STUDENT OF THE YEAR. 470 00:20:58,990 --> 00:21:00,525 I WON'T GET TO GO TO FENWAY, 471 00:21:00,557 --> 00:21:03,560 AND FORGET ABOUT HANGING WITH DANNY KOSTAS. 472 00:21:03,594 --> 00:21:04,929 MAN, WE'VE GOT TO GET RID OF-- 473 00:21:04,961 --> 00:21:06,064 OH! 474 00:21:06,096 --> 00:21:07,331 JACKIE! 475 00:21:07,365 --> 00:21:09,534 OH! 476 00:21:09,567 --> 00:21:11,970 I MISSED YOU SO MUCH, JACKIE, BOO-BOO BEAR! 477 00:21:13,837 --> 00:21:15,572 WHO ARE YOU? 478 00:21:15,605 --> 00:21:17,509 I'M LISA, YOU SILLY GOOSE. 479 00:21:17,541 --> 00:21:19,443 OH! THIS IS LISA! 480 00:21:19,477 --> 00:21:20,612 YOUR GIRLFRIEND! 481 00:21:20,644 --> 00:21:22,780 - FROM ARIZONA. - COOL. 482 00:21:22,814 --> 00:21:23,515 NO! NOT COOL. 483 00:21:23,548 --> 00:21:25,517 IT'S NOT REAL. I MADE IT UP. 484 00:21:25,549 --> 00:21:26,550 THERE'S NO ARIZONA? 485 00:21:26,585 --> 00:21:29,354 I KNEW THE GRAND CANYON WAS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE! 486 00:21:29,386 --> 00:21:32,790 WAIT! YOU MADE UP A FAKE GIRLFRIEND? 487 00:21:32,824 --> 00:21:34,058 YOU LIED TO US? 488 00:21:34,092 --> 00:21:37,329 I AM NOT FAKE! 489 00:21:37,362 --> 00:21:40,465 SEE WHAT I MADE FOR YOU, SNOOKUMS? 490 00:21:50,007 --> 00:21:51,743 DUDE? 491 00:21:51,776 --> 00:21:54,012 ON IT. 492 00:21:55,880 --> 00:21:57,849 HEY... JEN. 493 00:21:57,882 --> 00:22:01,553 UH... I'VE BEEN MEANING TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING. 494 00:22:01,586 --> 00:22:02,620 OKAY, OKAY. 495 00:22:02,653 --> 00:22:04,489 UH, WHY ARE YOU HERE? 496 00:22:04,521 --> 00:22:06,124 WHY WOULDN'T I WANT TO SEE MY BOYFRIEND? 497 00:22:06,156 --> 00:22:08,125 WHAT? 498 00:22:08,159 --> 00:22:09,461 I'M NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND! 499 00:22:09,493 --> 00:22:12,062 ARE YOU BREAKING UP WITH ME? 500 00:22:12,997 --> 00:22:16,901 AFTER I DROVE ALL THE WAY FROM ARIZONA? 501 00:22:16,933 --> 00:22:19,503 ON A LEARNER'S PERMIT? 502 00:22:20,505 --> 00:22:21,873 WOW, JACK, I'M SURPRISED! 503 00:22:21,905 --> 00:22:24,908 YOU AND LISA ALWAYS SEEMED SO SOLID. 504 00:22:24,942 --> 00:22:25,942 HMM... 505 00:22:25,977 --> 00:22:29,047 I HAVE NO IDEA IF YOU SHOULD TAKE JAZZ OR TAP. 506 00:22:29,079 --> 00:22:30,881 AND I HAVE NO IDEA 507 00:22:30,914 --> 00:22:32,951 WHY YOU'VE BEEN MEANING TO ASK ME THAT. 508 00:22:32,983 --> 00:22:34,818 OKAY. JUST, UH... 509 00:22:34,852 --> 00:22:37,656 TELL ME WHICH YOU LIKE BETTER. 510 00:22:40,958 --> 00:22:42,460 THIS ISN'T EVEN REAL! 511 00:22:42,492 --> 00:22:44,395 WHAT WE HAVE ISN'T REAL? 512 00:22:44,429 --> 00:22:46,765 I SEE HOW IT IS. 513 00:22:46,798 --> 00:22:49,067 : YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST THROW ME AWAY, 514 00:22:49,099 --> 00:22:50,567 LIKE A STALE ENCHILADA? 515 00:22:50,601 --> 00:22:54,506 WELL, GIRLFRIENDS ARE NOT ENCHILADAS, JACK! 516 00:22:54,538 --> 00:22:56,039 MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE BREAKING UP 517 00:22:56,073 --> 00:22:57,409 IN PUBLIC LIKE THIS. 518 00:22:57,442 --> 00:22:58,643 WE AREN'T BREAKING UP. 519 00:22:58,675 --> 00:23:00,043 WE COULDN'T POSSIBLY BE BREAKING UP 520 00:23:00,076 --> 00:23:01,880 BECAUSE WE WERE NEVER DATING! 521 00:23:01,913 --> 00:23:05,482 WAH-AH-AH! 522 00:23:05,516 --> 00:23:06,951 NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. 523 00:23:06,983 --> 00:23:08,185 HOW ABOUT THIS? 524 00:23:11,756 --> 00:23:14,625 LET'S GO OVER HERE WHERE NO ONE CAN SEE YOU CRYING. 525 00:23:18,895 --> 00:23:19,663 TA-DAH! 526 00:23:19,696 --> 00:23:22,900 AS IMPRESSIVE AS THIS IS... NOT, 527 00:23:22,933 --> 00:23:25,702 JUST TELL JACK THAT I CAME OUT HERE TO SEE MIKEY, 528 00:23:25,736 --> 00:23:28,039 BUT YOU WEIRDED ME OUT, SO I LEFT. 529 00:23:28,071 --> 00:23:30,808 OKAY. 530 00:23:34,144 --> 00:23:35,747 I THINK JAZZ, BUT... 531 00:23:35,779 --> 00:23:37,816 LET ME SEE THE TAP AGAIN. 532 00:23:37,848 --> 00:23:39,149 CALM DOWN. I DON'T KNOW WHAT GOT INTO ME. 533 00:23:39,182 --> 00:23:40,184 I'M REALLY EXCITED TO SEE YOU. 534 00:23:40,218 --> 00:23:42,554 I KNEW IT! I KNEW YOU WERE THE ONE. 535 00:23:42,586 --> 00:23:44,588 LET'S GET A FAMILY CELL PLAN. 536 00:23:44,622 --> 00:23:46,724 THAT WAY, OUR LOVE WILL BE FOREVER. 537 00:23:46,757 --> 00:23:48,960 YEAH... LET'S DO THAT. 538 00:23:48,992 --> 00:23:52,763 UH... OH! BUT I GOT SCHOOL, SO HOW ABOUT I MEET YOU AFTER? 539 00:23:52,797 --> 00:23:54,531 AFTER SCHOOL IT IS. EE! 540 00:23:54,565 --> 00:23:56,234 OKAY. 541 00:23:56,267 --> 00:23:58,836 OH! YOU KNOW WHAT, MIKEY? 542 00:23:58,869 --> 00:24:01,171 WHY DON'T YOU GO WITH HER, SO SHE DOESN'T GET LOST? 543 00:24:01,204 --> 00:24:02,941 OH, BUT I WANTED TO MEET-- 544 00:24:02,973 --> 00:24:04,075 THANKS, MAN. YOU'RE JUST THE BEST. 545 00:24:04,107 --> 00:24:06,911 DON'T KEEP ME WAITING TOO LONG, POOKIE. 546 00:24:06,943 --> 00:24:09,980 YOU KNOW I DON'T LIKE TO BE DISAPPOINTED. 547 00:24:13,584 --> 00:24:15,753 DUDE! WHAT IS HAPPENING? 548 00:24:15,786 --> 00:24:18,222 WORST-CASE SCENARIO? 549 00:24:18,256 --> 00:24:19,791 WORST-CASE SCENARIO! 550 00:24:19,824 --> 00:24:21,159 ALL OF MY LIES ARE ALL COMING TRUE. 551 00:24:21,192 --> 00:24:23,595 SOMEHOW, THE THINGS THAT I MADE UP ARE REAL NOW. 552 00:24:23,627 --> 00:24:25,797 WHAT? HOW? WHAT? 553 00:24:25,829 --> 00:24:26,630 EXACTLY. 554 00:24:26,663 --> 00:24:27,531 SO, WAIT-- 555 00:24:27,565 --> 00:24:30,869 IF I LIE ABOUT SOMETHING, IT'LL COME TRUE? 556 00:24:32,068 --> 00:24:34,138 I... HAVE A JET-PACK! 557 00:24:35,839 --> 00:24:37,074 I MEAN, I'M NOT GOING CRAZY, AM I? 558 00:24:37,107 --> 00:24:38,142 AM I GOING CRAZY? 559 00:24:39,242 --> 00:24:41,879 GUYS, IT DIDN'T WORK FOR ME. 560 00:24:41,913 --> 00:24:45,149 MAYBE I SHOULD TO TRY IT FROM HIGHER. 561 00:24:45,182 --> 00:24:47,184 WE CAN'T BOTH BE GOING CRAZY. 562 00:24:47,218 --> 00:24:49,254 I'M SURE THERE'S A PERFECTLY REASONABLE EXPLANATION 563 00:24:49,287 --> 00:24:50,855 FOR ALL THIS. 564 00:24:50,887 --> 00:24:52,656 HAVE YOU ANGERED A GENIE? 565 00:24:52,690 --> 00:24:55,192 OR, UH, STOLEN GOLD FROM A LEPRECHAUN? 566 00:24:55,226 --> 00:24:56,694 NOT THAT I'M AWARE OF. 567 00:24:56,727 --> 00:24:57,561 WELL, WE NEED TO FIGURE OUT 568 00:24:57,595 --> 00:24:59,663 HOW TO STOP THIS BEFORE IT GETS WORSE. 569 00:24:59,696 --> 00:25:01,064 "WORSE"? 570 00:25:01,097 --> 00:25:04,201 HOW COULD THIS POSSIBLY GET ANY WORSE? 571 00:25:06,170 --> 00:25:08,006 OH! WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT? 572 00:25:08,038 --> 00:25:10,141 YOU NEVER SAY THAT! ROOKIE MOVE, MAN! 573 00:25:10,173 --> 00:25:11,643 SO YOU THINK YOU CAN COME INTO OUR FOREST, 574 00:25:11,675 --> 00:25:14,078 PICK A FIGHT... AND JUST FORGET ABOUT IT? 575 00:25:16,047 --> 00:25:16,881 WE DIDN'T FORGET. 576 00:25:16,914 --> 00:25:19,683 LUMBERJACKS HAVE MEMORIES LIKE MOOSE. 577 00:25:19,717 --> 00:25:21,786 MOOSE HAVE EXCELLENT MEMORIES. 578 00:25:21,818 --> 00:25:23,221 DON'T TELL ME. THE LUMBERJACKS? 579 00:25:23,253 --> 00:25:25,756 FROM WHEN YOU DIDN'T BREAK YOUR ARM AT THE BIKE PARK? 580 00:25:25,789 --> 00:25:26,891 OH, OKAY. GUYS... 581 00:25:26,924 --> 00:25:29,159 THERE'S NO NEED TO GET PHYSICAL. WE CAN WORK THIS OUT! 582 00:25:29,192 --> 00:25:31,663 I CAME HERE TO WEAR FLANNEL AND KICK BUTT. 583 00:25:31,695 --> 00:25:33,932 AND I ALREADY GOT MY FLANNELS ON! 584 00:25:33,964 --> 00:25:35,966 FLANNEL IS THE FABRIC OF CHOICE FOR LUMBERJACKIN' 585 00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:40,003 BECAUSE IT CONTINUES TO INSULATE EVEN WHEN IT'S WET. 586 00:25:40,037 --> 00:25:42,207 THAT WAS SURPRISINGLY INFORMATIVE. 587 00:25:43,673 --> 00:25:46,577 WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO FIGHT THEM. YOU GUYS TAKE THE BIG ONE. 588 00:25:46,611 --> 00:25:47,645 THEY'RE BOTH THE BIG ONE! 589 00:25:53,651 --> 00:25:55,019 STURDY. HEH. 590 00:25:55,051 --> 00:25:57,254 GOOD LUCK. 591 00:25:57,288 --> 00:26:00,091 OKAY. I CAN BUY YOU THREE SECONDS. 592 00:26:01,258 --> 00:26:02,826 HEY, GUYS! 593 00:26:02,859 --> 00:26:05,996 CAN I GET YOUR OPINION ON SOMETHING? 594 00:26:11,402 --> 00:26:14,139 NO-NO-NO-- NO, OKAY. OKAY. 595 00:26:16,007 --> 00:26:18,977 : OOH! I DON'T THINK THAT'S SUPPOSED TO STRETCH! 596 00:26:19,009 --> 00:26:20,944 AHH-- 597 00:26:20,978 --> 00:26:23,381 OOH! AH! 598 00:26:23,413 --> 00:26:26,183 SO MAYBE THE JAZZ, THEN? 599 00:26:40,030 --> 00:26:42,866 - PULL HARDER! - IT'S SUCK! 600 00:26:42,900 --> 00:26:45,003 YOU'D BETTER BE COWERING IN THERE! 601 00:26:46,037 --> 00:26:48,840 : COME ON, CHIP! PUT SOME MUSCLE INTO IT. 602 00:27:00,217 --> 00:27:03,153 JACK? 603 00:27:03,186 --> 00:27:04,254 AHH. HI, JENNIFER. 604 00:27:04,288 --> 00:27:05,423 WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? 605 00:27:05,455 --> 00:27:08,125 OH. UM, LUMBERJACKS. 606 00:27:08,159 --> 00:27:11,028 I'M GOING TO PRETEND THAT'S NOT A WEIRD ANSWER. 607 00:27:11,061 --> 00:27:12,429 SO, UH, WHATCHA-- WHATCHA DOIN'? 608 00:27:12,462 --> 00:27:13,998 OH, JUST TALKING TO MIKEY. 609 00:27:14,030 --> 00:27:14,865 WHAT? 610 00:27:14,898 --> 00:27:16,299 HEY, BUDDY. 611 00:27:16,333 --> 00:27:17,802 NICE SHIRT! 612 00:27:17,835 --> 00:27:19,737 A LOT OF PEOPLE CAN'T PULL OFF THE SHREDDED LOOK, 613 00:27:19,769 --> 00:27:20,971 BUT YOU ARE NAILIN' IT. 614 00:27:22,039 --> 00:27:25,009 -: IT'S TIMBER-R-R-R-- - TIMBER-R-R-- 615 00:27:25,041 --> 00:27:26,711 ...TIME. 616 00:27:26,743 --> 00:27:28,779 OKAY, UH, LET'S GO STAND SOMEWHERE ELSE. 617 00:27:28,813 --> 00:27:29,747 HERE THEY ARE! 618 00:27:29,779 --> 00:27:31,982 OKAY. 619 00:27:32,016 --> 00:27:35,053 COLUMBIAN MAPLE? 620 00:27:35,086 --> 00:27:37,954 IT'S LIKE THE GUY'S NEVER BARRICADED A DOOR BEFORE. 621 00:27:41,726 --> 00:27:43,294 I TOLD YOU TO STAY WITH LISA. 622 00:27:43,326 --> 00:27:45,063 OH, SHE GOT TIRED OF WAITING AROUND AND TOOK OFF. 623 00:27:45,096 --> 00:27:46,463 SOMETHING ABOUT STAKING OUT YOUR HOUSE? 624 00:27:46,497 --> 00:27:48,365 WAIT. WHO'S LISA? 625 00:27:48,398 --> 00:27:50,467 OH, UH, JUST A... 626 00:27:50,500 --> 00:27:52,403 OLD FRIEND FROM COLLEGE. 627 00:27:52,435 --> 00:27:53,937 YOU'RE STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL. 628 00:27:53,971 --> 00:27:54,905 IT WAS A SUMMER PROGRAM. 629 00:27:54,939 --> 00:27:57,341 WELL, I'M GLAD I GOT TO FINALLY MEET MIKEY. 630 00:27:57,374 --> 00:27:59,143 HE'S FANTASTIC. 631 00:27:59,175 --> 00:28:00,877 WHAT ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW? 632 00:28:00,911 --> 00:28:02,947 YOU HAVE TO COME OVER TO MY HOUSE. 633 00:28:02,980 --> 00:28:04,347 WE HAVE THE CUTEST KITTY. 634 00:28:04,381 --> 00:28:06,417 AW! 635 00:28:06,450 --> 00:28:07,951 YOU THROW IN SOME LEMONADE, 636 00:28:07,984 --> 00:28:11,254 AND YOU JUST DESCRIBED MY PERFECT AFTERNOON. 637 00:28:11,288 --> 00:28:12,355 WE'VE GOT A HUGGER! 638 00:28:12,388 --> 00:28:13,990 OH, OKAY. 639 00:28:14,023 --> 00:28:15,992 WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO HER? YOU CAN'T TALK TO HER. 640 00:28:16,026 --> 00:28:18,229 - WHY CAN'T I TALK TO HER? - YEAH, WHY CAN'T HE TALK TO ME? 641 00:28:18,261 --> 00:28:19,129 IT'S JUST, YOU KNOW, 642 00:28:19,163 --> 00:28:21,231 YOU GUYS ARE JUST BOTH COMPLETE STRANGERS. 643 00:28:21,265 --> 00:28:21,999 WE ARE NOT STRANGERS. 644 00:28:22,032 --> 00:28:23,900 YOU'VE TOLD ME SO MUCH ABOUT JENNY, 645 00:28:23,933 --> 00:28:25,737 - I FEEL LIKE I ALREADY KNOW HER. "JENNY"? 646 00:28:25,769 --> 00:28:26,503 YOU TALK ABOUT ME? 647 00:28:26,537 --> 00:28:27,872 PFFT. NO! 648 00:28:27,904 --> 00:28:29,139 SURE HE DOES. 649 00:28:29,173 --> 00:28:31,509 AND YOU ARE JUST AS BEAUTIFUL AS JACK IS ALWAYS SAYING YOU ARE. 650 00:28:31,541 --> 00:28:32,943 I NEVER TOLD SAID THAT TO YOU! 651 00:28:32,977 --> 00:28:34,078 YOU DON'T THINK SHE'S BEAUTIFUL? 652 00:28:34,111 --> 00:28:35,847 OH, WHAT? 653 00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:38,182 NO, I-- 654 00:28:38,214 --> 00:28:41,885 WILL YOU EXCUSE US FOR A SECOND? THANK YOU. 655 00:28:45,088 --> 00:28:46,124 I CAN SEE WHY YOU LIKE HER SO MUCH. 656 00:28:46,156 --> 00:28:47,391 DUDE, I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU! 657 00:28:47,424 --> 00:28:50,994 WILL YOU PLEASE JUST STAY AWAY FROM HER? AND ALL MY FRIENDS! 658 00:28:51,028 --> 00:28:52,230 I HAVE BIG THINGS GOING ON THIS WEEK, 659 00:28:52,262 --> 00:28:54,264 AND I CAN'T HAVE YOU MESSING THEM UP! 660 00:28:55,332 --> 00:28:57,401 : HEY, LOOK! ISN'T THAT MIKEY? 661 00:28:57,433 --> 00:28:58,403 HEY! 662 00:29:07,310 --> 00:29:09,946 THEY WEDGIED ME SO HARD, I CAN TASTE MY UNDERWEAR. 663 00:29:09,980 --> 00:29:11,883 I THINK I NEED PLIERS TO DIG THEM OUT. 664 00:29:13,183 --> 00:29:14,951 THIS GUY'S GOTTA BE A FAKE. 665 00:29:14,984 --> 00:29:17,521 IF ONLY WE COULD PROVE IT. 666 00:29:17,555 --> 00:29:19,190 MAYBE WE CAN. 667 00:29:19,222 --> 00:29:22,493 WE HAVE TO DEFEAT HIM IN THE ARENA OF THE MIND. 668 00:29:25,596 --> 00:29:27,365 OKAY. 669 00:29:29,032 --> 00:29:31,935 OH... HEY, MIKEY. 670 00:29:33,369 --> 00:29:35,438 SO, YOU'VE KNOWN JACK A WHILE NOW, HUH? 671 00:29:35,471 --> 00:29:38,175 YEAH, TWO YEARS. A TRUE FRIEND. 672 00:29:38,209 --> 00:29:39,576 AREN'T FRIENDS THE GREATEST? 673 00:29:39,609 --> 00:29:40,510 YEAH. 674 00:29:40,545 --> 00:29:43,147 I STILL REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME I MET JACK. 675 00:29:43,180 --> 00:29:45,583 THIRD GRADE! SCIENCE CLASS. 676 00:29:45,615 --> 00:29:48,286 OH! YEAH, YEAH. 677 00:29:48,318 --> 00:29:51,923 I WAS TOTALLY BUMMED BECAUSE, UH, 678 00:29:51,955 --> 00:29:52,889 MY PET GOLDFISH HAD JUST DIED. 679 00:29:52,923 --> 00:29:54,057 UH, "LADYBUG." 680 00:29:54,090 --> 00:29:56,426 AND RYAN HELPED ME FLUSH HIM. 681 00:29:57,627 --> 00:29:59,163 THAT'S JUST WHAT FRIENDS DO. 682 00:29:59,195 --> 00:30:01,365 YOU GUYS NEVER TOLD ME THAT STORY. 683 00:30:01,397 --> 00:30:03,233 THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL. 684 00:30:03,267 --> 00:30:06,103 HMM, WELL, I MUST HAVE THINGS WRONG, 685 00:30:06,135 --> 00:30:08,271 BECAUSE, IF I RECALL, 686 00:30:08,305 --> 00:30:09,539 YOU MET IN THE FIFTH GRADE. 687 00:30:09,573 --> 00:30:10,574 YOUR PET DIDN'T DIE, IT ESCAPED, 688 00:30:10,607 --> 00:30:12,576 WHICH MAKES MORE SENSE, BECAUSE IT WAS A TURTLE, 689 00:30:12,609 --> 00:30:13,677 NOT A GOLDFISH, 690 00:30:13,711 --> 00:30:14,846 AND YOU DIDN'T FLUSH IT, RYAN HELPED YOU PAINT A ROCK 691 00:30:14,878 --> 00:30:17,347 UNDER THE BIG OAK TREE IN YOUR BACKYARD AS A MEMORIAL. 692 00:30:17,381 --> 00:30:18,349 AND SOMETIMES... 693 00:30:18,382 --> 00:30:21,419 YOU STILL HEAR THE PITTER-PATTER OF TINY FLIPPERS 694 00:30:21,451 --> 00:30:23,253 WHEN YOU SIT IN ITS SHADE. 695 00:30:26,123 --> 00:30:28,259 AT LEAST THAT'S HOW I REMEMBER IT. 696 00:30:30,059 --> 00:30:31,995 THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING. 697 00:30:32,028 --> 00:30:34,397 WHY IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING? 698 00:30:38,001 --> 00:30:40,504 LET'S GO, PIT-STAINS. 699 00:30:42,138 --> 00:30:43,206 OKAY, LET'S FIGURE THIS OUT. 700 00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:44,442 HOW MANY LIES HAVE YOU TOLD? 701 00:30:44,474 --> 00:30:46,443 I STARTED A LIST. 702 00:30:46,477 --> 00:30:49,146 ONE TIME, I TRIED TO IMPRESS PEOPLE AT SUMMER CAMP 703 00:30:49,179 --> 00:30:51,382 BY TELLING THEM MY UNCLE WAS A PRO WRESTLER 704 00:30:51,414 --> 00:30:53,951 OH, I WAS LATE MEETING ERIC AT THE MOVIES 705 00:30:53,983 --> 00:30:55,653 SO I SAID I WAS ALMOST ABDUCTED BY ALIENS. 706 00:30:55,685 --> 00:30:58,021 YOU ARE LUCKY TO BE ALIVE. 707 00:30:58,055 --> 00:31:00,423 I SAID I WAS ADOPTED BY ASIAN PARENTS 708 00:31:00,457 --> 00:31:02,226 SO I COULD CUT CLASS ON CHINESE NEW YEAR-- 709 00:31:02,259 --> 00:31:03,461 HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? MAYBE IT'S EASIER 710 00:31:03,493 --> 00:31:05,395 IF YOU LIST THE THINGS YOU DIDN'T LIE ABOUT. 711 00:31:05,429 --> 00:31:07,064 HANNAH? 712 00:31:07,096 --> 00:31:09,634 WHEN YOU GOT BRACES, I WAS EMBARRASSED. 713 00:31:09,666 --> 00:31:11,001 I TOLD PEOPLE I DIDN'T HAVE A SISTER. 714 00:31:11,035 --> 00:31:12,136 BUT YOU'RE STILL HERE. YOU'RE STILL HERE! 715 00:31:12,169 --> 00:31:14,572 THAT MEANS THERE'S STILL HOPE! 716 00:31:18,174 --> 00:31:21,177 OKAY. I'LL HOP ON THE CRAZY TRAIN. 717 00:31:21,211 --> 00:31:23,181 WHAT ARE YOU BABBLING ABOUT? 718 00:31:26,317 --> 00:31:27,484 HEY. LOOK! 719 00:31:27,518 --> 00:31:29,319 IT'S JENNIFER AND MIKEY! 720 00:31:29,353 --> 00:31:30,587 OVER HERE, GUYS! 721 00:31:35,726 --> 00:31:37,061 WE HAVE TO FOLLOW THEM. 722 00:31:37,094 --> 00:31:40,498 WE HAVE TO FIND OUT WHAT HE'S SAYING TO HER. 723 00:31:40,530 --> 00:31:42,332 I DON'T KNOW-- 724 00:31:47,471 --> 00:31:49,574 I'M JUST TWO BLOCKS UP ON THE LEFT. 725 00:31:59,115 --> 00:32:01,085 OKAY, LET'S GO. 726 00:32:01,117 --> 00:32:03,520 BUT WHATEVER YOU DO, ACT NATURAL. 727 00:32:09,993 --> 00:32:11,528 DUDE, WOULD YOU STOP THAT? 728 00:32:11,561 --> 00:32:13,530 THE NEIGHBORS ARE GONNA THINK WE'RE UP TO SOMETHING. 729 00:32:13,564 --> 00:32:15,466 WE ARE UP TO SOMETHING! 730 00:32:26,309 --> 00:32:27,211 OH... 731 00:32:27,244 --> 00:32:30,046 DUDE, HAS JENNIFER EVER INVITED YOU OVER? 732 00:32:30,079 --> 00:32:31,381 SILENCE! 733 00:32:35,719 --> 00:32:37,054 YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. 734 00:32:37,086 --> 00:32:39,490 I KNOW. I'M GOING IN. 735 00:32:39,522 --> 00:32:41,192 WHAT? 736 00:32:41,224 --> 00:32:42,492 I LIED THIS GUY INTO EXISTENCE. 737 00:32:42,526 --> 00:32:43,326 I NEED TO MAKE SURE 738 00:32:43,359 --> 00:32:45,228 HE DOESN'T DO ANYTHING TO HURT ANYONE, 739 00:32:45,261 --> 00:32:48,398 OR WORSE-- MESS UP MY CHANCES WITH THE SOX. 740 00:32:48,432 --> 00:32:49,567 THAT'S WORSE? 741 00:32:49,599 --> 00:32:51,634 FINE, "EQUALLY TRAGIC." 742 00:32:57,207 --> 00:32:58,743 - DUDE. - ON IT. 743 00:33:06,784 --> 00:33:08,219 HI. CAN I HELP YOU? 744 00:33:08,251 --> 00:33:09,653 YEAH, UM, HI. 745 00:33:09,685 --> 00:33:11,422 - HI! - HI. 746 00:33:11,454 --> 00:33:13,790 I'M SELLING BUMBLEBEE GIRLS COOKIES. 747 00:33:13,824 --> 00:33:17,128 AND YOU'RE A BUMBLEBEE... GIRL? 748 00:33:17,161 --> 00:33:19,697 NOT YET. JUST GOT TO SELL SOME MORE COOKIES. 749 00:33:19,730 --> 00:33:21,231 OH... 750 00:33:21,265 --> 00:33:23,401 YOU ARE... 751 00:33:24,835 --> 00:33:26,703 SO... 752 00:33:26,737 --> 00:33:27,705 I'M JUST GONNA GRAB MY PURSE. 753 00:33:27,738 --> 00:33:28,939 NO, NO. NO, NO. 754 00:33:28,972 --> 00:33:33,543 UM, FIRST, I NEED TO RECITE THE BUMBLEBEE GIRL CODE FOR YOU. 755 00:33:33,576 --> 00:33:35,145 GREAT. 756 00:33:35,179 --> 00:33:38,349 "A BUMBLEBEE GIRL IS HONEST AND TRUE. 757 00:33:38,382 --> 00:33:43,387 "A BUMBLEBEE GIRL IS BLACK AND--" 758 00:33:43,420 --> 00:33:44,255 YELLOW? 759 00:33:44,288 --> 00:33:45,423 YELLOW! 760 00:33:45,455 --> 00:33:49,125 UH, "A BUMBLEBEE GIRL NEVER STINGS UNLESS SHE HAS TO." 761 00:33:53,196 --> 00:33:55,532 AND THIS IS BUTTONS. 762 00:33:55,566 --> 00:33:57,601 : OH, MY GOSH, BUTTONS IS SO CUTE. 763 00:33:57,634 --> 00:33:58,836 : I KNOW! 764 00:33:58,868 --> 00:34:00,236 : BUTTONS IS CUTE AS A BUTTON 765 00:34:00,269 --> 00:34:01,305 INSIDE A BUTTON. 766 00:34:01,337 --> 00:34:04,674 THAT'S BUTTON WITHIN ANOTHER BUTTON. 767 00:34:06,710 --> 00:34:07,678 : YOU ARE CRAZY. 768 00:34:07,711 --> 00:34:08,711 : HE'S SO CUTE! 769 00:34:08,744 --> 00:34:10,181 I WANT TO SNUGGLE WITH HIM! 770 00:34:10,213 --> 00:34:11,416 KITTENS. 771 00:34:31,534 --> 00:34:33,703 OH, YEAH. 772 00:34:34,838 --> 00:34:36,574 PEW! 773 00:34:39,809 --> 00:34:41,679 OOH. 774 00:34:48,418 --> 00:34:51,389 MM! HELLO. 775 00:35:05,402 --> 00:35:07,505 : HONEY! 776 00:35:07,538 --> 00:35:10,173 DO YOU WANT SOME BUMBLEBEE GIRL COOKIES? 777 00:35:10,206 --> 00:35:12,643 OOH! GET ME THE "LEMONY ZESTS." 778 00:35:12,675 --> 00:35:15,913 BUT NO "PEPPERMINT FATTIES!" THEY'RE WAY OVERRATED! 779 00:35:15,945 --> 00:35:17,714 HANG ON. 780 00:35:17,748 --> 00:35:20,384 I'D BETTER HANDLE THIS. 781 00:36:12,835 --> 00:36:13,971 WHAT... 782 00:36:14,003 --> 00:36:15,605 JUST... 783 00:36:15,639 --> 00:36:16,941 HAPPENED? 784 00:36:30,454 --> 00:36:31,956 I SAID I DON'T WANT ANY "PEPPERMINT FATTIES." 785 00:36:31,989 --> 00:36:32,990 I TOLD HIM, HAL. 786 00:36:33,023 --> 00:36:33,990 I TOLD HIM, I SAID, 787 00:36:34,023 --> 00:36:35,792 "MY HUSBAND DOESN'T LIKE THE PEPPERMINT FATTIES." 788 00:36:37,027 --> 00:36:39,862 : SO... BEST OF LUCK BECOMING A BUMBLE BEE GIRL. 789 00:36:39,896 --> 00:36:41,332 WAIT. 790 00:36:41,364 --> 00:36:43,299 FIRST, I NEED TO GET YOUR OPINION ON SOMETHING. 791 00:36:46,436 --> 00:36:47,671 WHOO! 792 00:36:47,704 --> 00:36:49,273 OKAY. OR... OR-- 793 00:36:49,306 --> 00:36:52,610 YEAH, IT JUST SEEMS LIKE 794 00:36:52,643 --> 00:36:54,711 JACK IS ALWAYS PLAYING GAMES, YOU KNOW? 795 00:36:54,744 --> 00:36:56,746 : I'VE FOUND THAT PEOPLE TEND TO PLAY GAMES 796 00:36:56,780 --> 00:36:58,749 WHEN THEY'RE AFRAID TO SHOW YOU WHO THEY REALLY ARE. 797 00:36:58,782 --> 00:37:01,619 I'M WITH OLD BEN FRANKLIN ON THIS ONE-- 798 00:37:01,652 --> 00:37:03,820 HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY. 799 00:37:04,755 --> 00:37:05,990 WHAT DOES THAT GUY KNOW ABOUT HONESTY? 800 00:37:06,023 --> 00:37:07,825 HE'S A TOTAL LIE! 801 00:37:07,858 --> 00:37:09,493 YOU KNOW, I FEEL LIKE I CAN TELL YOU ANYTHING, MIKEY. 802 00:37:09,525 --> 00:37:10,627 WELL, YOU CAN DEFINITELY TELL ME 803 00:37:10,661 --> 00:37:12,596 WHERE I CAN GET SOME MORE 804 00:37:12,628 --> 00:37:14,797 OF THESE DELICIOUS MUFFINS. 805 00:37:14,831 --> 00:37:16,066 THEY'RE DELICIOUS. 806 00:37:16,099 --> 00:37:19,503 : OH, YOU KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF THOSE MUFFINS. 807 00:37:20,570 --> 00:37:22,807 DID YOU HEAR SOMETHING? 808 00:37:23,773 --> 00:37:24,507 MUST'VE BEEN YOUR FOLKS... 809 00:37:24,541 --> 00:37:25,742 HOW MANY EMOTICONS CAN YOU USE? 810 00:37:25,775 --> 00:37:26,909 ...WHO ARE AWESOME, BY THE WAY! 811 00:37:27,943 --> 00:37:30,748 ♪ DOO-DAH! ♪ 812 00:37:30,780 --> 00:37:32,849 - YEAH... - YEAH? 813 00:37:32,882 --> 00:37:34,984 WELL, "YES" TO THE TAP, 814 00:37:35,018 --> 00:37:39,023 BUT I'M STICKING STRONG ON "NO" TO THE PEPPERMINT FATTIES. 815 00:37:40,757 --> 00:37:42,626 AW, COME ON. 816 00:37:42,659 --> 00:37:43,527 NO. WAIT! 817 00:37:43,559 --> 00:37:44,527 BUMBLEBEES NEVER GIVE UP! 818 00:37:44,561 --> 00:37:48,298 HAL, HONEY, CAN YOU EMPTY THE KITTY LITTER? 819 00:37:48,331 --> 00:37:50,534 BUT MY BUBBLE BATH IS GONNA GET COLD. 820 00:37:50,567 --> 00:37:52,536 IT'S BEEN A WEEK. 821 00:37:52,568 --> 00:37:54,904 - FINE. - LOVE YOU! 822 00:37:57,773 --> 00:37:59,844 UGH. KITTENS. 823 00:38:23,800 --> 00:38:26,903 OHH! OHH, OHH... 824 00:38:30,005 --> 00:38:32,576 OHH... UGH. 825 00:38:40,016 --> 00:38:42,385 GROSS. 826 00:38:42,418 --> 00:38:43,721 SO GROSS. 827 00:38:45,121 --> 00:38:47,023 OH! 828 00:39:04,907 --> 00:39:07,411 SHH, SHH, SHH... 829 00:39:07,443 --> 00:39:08,512 : HONEY? 830 00:39:08,545 --> 00:39:11,115 THE GARBAGE ISN'T A TOY. OKAY? 831 00:39:11,148 --> 00:39:12,750 ENJOY YOUR TEA. 832 00:39:16,519 --> 00:39:17,954 PLEASE, PLEASE! SHH, SHH, SHH! 833 00:39:39,842 --> 00:39:44,514 SON, WHAT IN THE WORLD DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING? 834 00:39:44,547 --> 00:39:46,682 NEIGHBORS CALLED ABOUT A TRESPASSER. 835 00:39:46,715 --> 00:39:47,918 DON'T YOU WORK AT THE CONVENTION CENTER? 836 00:39:47,951 --> 00:39:48,818 I DID. 837 00:39:48,851 --> 00:39:51,422 UNTIL I WAS FIRED FOR LEAVING MY POST 838 00:39:51,454 --> 00:39:52,489 TO CHASE PRETEND BEARS. 839 00:39:52,521 --> 00:39:53,724 IF I EVER CATCH 840 00:39:53,757 --> 00:39:55,192 THAT LITTLE PUNK THAT LIED TO ME, 841 00:39:55,224 --> 00:39:56,860 I'M GONNA WRITE SUCH A-- 842 00:39:56,893 --> 00:39:58,661 JACK? 843 00:39:59,628 --> 00:40:01,197 OH... HEY. 844 00:40:01,231 --> 00:40:03,867 JENNIFER. 845 00:40:03,900 --> 00:40:05,469 MIKEY. 846 00:40:05,501 --> 00:40:07,070 YOU OKAY, PARDNER? 847 00:40:07,103 --> 00:40:08,171 WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? 848 00:40:08,204 --> 00:40:12,977 YOU KNOW, I'D RATHER NOT SAY, SO I'M JUST GONNA-- 849 00:40:15,211 --> 00:40:16,213 HEY! 850 00:40:16,246 --> 00:40:20,550 THAT WAS COMPLETELY UNCALLED FOR! 851 00:40:20,583 --> 00:40:23,086 HAD MY HOUSE KEYS ON IT! 852 00:40:26,489 --> 00:40:29,792 : I WOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT IT, DUDE. 853 00:40:29,826 --> 00:40:31,461 I MEAN, IT COULD'VE BEEN WORSE. 854 00:40:37,233 --> 00:40:39,603 DUDE, I HAD TO SHOWER THREE TIMES 855 00:40:39,635 --> 00:40:42,472 JUST TO GET THE KITTY LITTER OUTTA MY EARS. 856 00:40:42,505 --> 00:40:44,841 YOU KNOW, I'M SURE JENNIFER'S FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT IT. 857 00:40:45,876 --> 00:40:47,611 YEAH, SHE'S NEVER GONNA FORGET ABOUT IT. 858 00:40:47,643 --> 00:40:48,978 THIS AFTERNOON, 859 00:40:49,012 --> 00:40:49,947 I HAD IT ALL, 860 00:40:49,980 --> 00:40:52,715 NOW IT'S ALL FALLING APART BECAUSE OF MIKEY. 861 00:40:52,748 --> 00:40:54,183 WELL, TECHNICALLY, YOU MADE HIM, 862 00:40:54,217 --> 00:40:56,119 SO, REALLY, IT'S ON YOU. 863 00:40:57,521 --> 00:40:58,822 WELL, WE HAVE TO THINK TACTICALLY. 864 00:40:58,855 --> 00:41:00,990 WE HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHO MIKEY IS 865 00:41:01,023 --> 00:41:03,527 AND SEND HIM BACK TO WHATEVER DIMENSION HE CAME FROM. 866 00:41:05,061 --> 00:41:06,730 DUDE. DROP THE BAT. 867 00:41:06,762 --> 00:41:08,197 HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PRACTICE BAT-BOYING 868 00:41:08,231 --> 00:41:09,566 IF YOU DON'T DROP THE BAT? 869 00:41:09,599 --> 00:41:10,901 YEAH. RIGHT. SORRY. 870 00:41:10,934 --> 00:41:13,202 - THANK YOU. - NAILED IT. 871 00:41:13,235 --> 00:41:14,771 THANKS. 872 00:41:25,981 --> 00:41:27,851 YOU DON'T THINK THEY'RE LAUGHING ABOUT 873 00:41:27,884 --> 00:41:29,853 WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY, DO YOU? 874 00:41:29,885 --> 00:41:32,822 NAH. I'M SURE IT'S SOMETHING ELSE. 875 00:41:32,856 --> 00:41:34,791 DUDE! I JUST HEARD THE FUNNIEST THING 876 00:41:34,824 --> 00:41:37,628 ABOUT YOU WEARING MAKEUP OUTSIDE JENNIFER'S HOUSE. 877 00:41:37,661 --> 00:41:39,563 EVERYBODY'S LAUGHING ABOUT IT. 878 00:41:39,596 --> 00:41:42,199 I MEAN, EVERYBODY. YOU'RE FAMOUS! 879 00:41:44,701 --> 00:41:46,670 OKAY, MAYBE THEY WERE LAUGHING 880 00:41:46,702 --> 00:41:47,670 ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY. 881 00:41:47,704 --> 00:41:50,039 I'M A JOKE. 882 00:41:50,072 --> 00:41:52,308 HEY! STAY FOCUSED. 883 00:41:52,342 --> 00:41:54,211 TODAY IS ALL ABOUT MIKEY. 884 00:41:54,244 --> 00:41:55,646 - WHAT'S ALL ABOUT ME? - GAH! 885 00:41:55,679 --> 00:41:57,280 WHERE DID YOU COME FROM? 886 00:41:57,313 --> 00:42:00,716 WELL, MY MOM SAYS FROM HEAVEN, BUT MY BIOLOGY TEACHER SAYS-- 887 00:42:00,750 --> 00:42:01,952 FORGET IT! 888 00:42:01,985 --> 00:42:03,320 I DON'T CARE. 889 00:42:03,353 --> 00:42:06,188 JACK, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE MAD AT ME. 890 00:42:06,222 --> 00:42:08,959 YOU'RE NOT MAD AT ME, ARE YOU? 891 00:42:08,992 --> 00:42:10,193 M-MAD? 892 00:42:10,226 --> 00:42:11,260 : MAD? 893 00:42:11,293 --> 00:42:12,596 HEY, JACK. 894 00:42:12,628 --> 00:42:14,831 EASY. 895 00:42:16,599 --> 00:42:19,735 OH, WHAT? WHY WOULD I BE MAD? 896 00:42:19,768 --> 00:42:21,971 WE'RE GOOD FRIENDS, RIGHT? 897 00:42:23,306 --> 00:42:25,108 I SURE AM GLAD TO HEAR YOU SAY THAT, 898 00:42:25,141 --> 00:42:27,344 BECAUSE I HAD SO MUCH FUN HERE YESTERDAY, 899 00:42:27,376 --> 00:42:29,645 I DECIDED TO COME BACK TODAY. 900 00:42:29,679 --> 00:42:31,914 IN FACT, I THINK I'M GONNA TRANSFER HERE. 901 00:42:31,947 --> 00:42:33,884 I WANNA SEE YOU WIN "STUDENT OF THE YEAR." 902 00:42:34,918 --> 00:42:37,788 GREAT NEWS. GREAT NEWS! 903 00:42:37,820 --> 00:42:40,690 I KNEW YOU'D BE EXCITED. 904 00:42:40,724 --> 00:42:41,792 OH, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, 905 00:42:41,824 --> 00:42:42,858 JENNIFER INVITED ME 906 00:42:42,891 --> 00:42:44,794 TO TAG ALONG TO HER CLASSES TODAY. 907 00:42:44,827 --> 00:42:46,630 ISN'T SHE NICE? 908 00:42:46,663 --> 00:42:48,130 OH-- 909 00:42:48,164 --> 00:42:49,199 UH-- 910 00:42:49,231 --> 00:42:50,666 - HI! - OH, UH, OKAY-- 911 00:42:50,699 --> 00:42:52,368 GREAT-- GREAT TALKING TO YOU, MIKEY. 912 00:42:52,402 --> 00:42:54,371 YOU HAVE A FANTASTIC DAY! 913 00:42:54,403 --> 00:42:56,873 I ALWAYS DO! 914 00:43:01,644 --> 00:43:02,980 WHY ARE YOU BEING SO NICE TO HIM? 915 00:43:03,012 --> 00:43:05,081 ARE YOU HAVING SOME SORT OF BREAKDOWN RIGHT NOW? 916 00:43:05,114 --> 00:43:06,382 CHECK IT OUT. 917 00:43:06,416 --> 00:43:07,818 YOU STOLE HIS WALLET? 918 00:43:07,851 --> 00:43:09,086 I'M GONNA GIVE IT BACK! 919 00:43:09,119 --> 00:43:10,153 AFTER I FIND OUT WHERE HE LIVES. 920 00:43:10,186 --> 00:43:13,856 OH, PERFECT, WELL, THAT MAKES IT ALL BETTER THEN. 921 00:43:13,889 --> 00:43:15,125 IF WE'RE GOING TO SEND HIM BACK TO WHERE HE CAME FROM, 922 00:43:15,157 --> 00:43:16,393 WE HAVE TO FIND OUT WHERE THAT IS. 923 00:43:16,425 --> 00:43:19,328 MIKEY, MIKEY, MIKEY... 924 00:43:19,362 --> 00:43:20,998 THESE ALL SAY MIKEY! 925 00:43:22,297 --> 00:43:24,999 JACKPOT. HA! 926 00:43:24,034 --> 00:43:25,402 OH, WE KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE, MIKEY. 927 00:43:25,434 --> 00:43:27,403 YOU ARE GOING DOWNTOWN! 928 00:43:27,436 --> 00:43:29,405 ACTUALLY, I THINK THAT'S UPTOWN. 929 00:43:29,438 --> 00:43:30,773 AND TO THE WEST. 930 00:43:31,775 --> 00:43:34,110 OH! OH, YEAH, NO, HE'S GOING DOWNTOWN. 931 00:43:34,143 --> 00:43:37,780 EVEN THOUGH THAT'S THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF THIS ADDRESS. 932 00:43:39,048 --> 00:43:40,817 ALRIGHT, WELL, THIS IS IT. 933 00:43:40,849 --> 00:43:43,052 THIS CAN'T BE RIGHT. 934 00:43:46,956 --> 00:43:48,191 THIS GUY IS TOO GOOD. 935 00:43:48,224 --> 00:43:50,327 HE'S BEEN MESSING WITH US THE WHOLE TIME. 936 00:43:50,360 --> 00:43:51,662 WHAT DO YOU MEAN? 937 00:43:51,695 --> 00:43:53,063 I USED TO TELL MY PARENTS 938 00:43:53,096 --> 00:43:54,764 I WOULD TAKE MIKEY HERE AS A REWARD 939 00:43:54,797 --> 00:43:56,298 WHEN HE DID WELL ON TESTS. 940 00:43:56,331 --> 00:43:57,733 COME ON. 941 00:44:02,072 --> 00:44:04,307 OKAY, OKAY, SO NOW WE JUST HAVE TO FIND SOMEONE 942 00:44:04,340 --> 00:44:06,309 WHO KNOWS WHO MIKEY IS. 943 00:44:09,846 --> 00:44:11,447 AND HOW ARE WE GONNA DO THAT? 944 00:44:11,481 --> 00:44:12,883 I DON'T KNOW. 945 00:44:12,916 --> 00:44:16,253 OH, JACK. WHAT'S UP? 946 00:44:16,286 --> 00:44:18,422 OH, HEY! GUY. 947 00:44:20,889 --> 00:44:21,958 DO YOU KNOW THAT KID? 948 00:44:21,990 --> 00:44:23,092 NO. 949 00:44:25,260 --> 00:44:27,163 HEY, EXCUSE ME? 950 00:44:27,197 --> 00:44:28,265 UH, HI! 951 00:44:28,297 --> 00:44:29,699 SO, UH... 952 00:44:29,733 --> 00:44:30,801 HOW DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? 953 00:44:30,833 --> 00:44:33,335 HOW DO I KNOW WHO YOU ARE? DUDE, YOU'RE HILARIOUS. 954 00:44:33,369 --> 00:44:34,471 WHERE'S MIKEY? 955 00:44:34,503 --> 00:44:36,072 AW, YOU KNOW MIKEY? 956 00:44:36,106 --> 00:44:37,841 'COURSE I KNOW MIKEY. YOU GUYS ARE BOTH HILARIOUS. 957 00:44:37,873 --> 00:44:39,442 YOU AND MIKEY ARE HERE ALL THE TIME. 958 00:44:39,476 --> 00:44:41,978 DUDE, ARE YOU SURE MIKEY ISN'T REAL? 959 00:44:42,010 --> 00:44:44,380 RIGHT NOW, I'M NOT EVEN SURE I'M REAL. 960 00:44:44,414 --> 00:44:45,515 UH, OKAY, SO, UM, 961 00:44:45,548 --> 00:44:48,784 YOU DON'T HAPPEN TO KNOW WHERE MIKEY IS NOW, DO YOU? 962 00:44:48,818 --> 00:44:51,955 OR WHERE HE LIVES? OR WHO HIS PARENTS ARE? 963 00:44:51,987 --> 00:44:53,956 OR WHAT SCHOOL HE GOES TO? OR WHERE HE HANGS OUT? 964 00:44:53,989 --> 00:44:56,125 SMOOTH... NOT STALKERY AT ALL. 965 00:44:56,159 --> 00:44:57,827 I KNOW WHERE HE HANGS. HE HANGS HERE. 966 00:44:57,860 --> 00:44:59,195 WITH YOU. 967 00:45:00,262 --> 00:45:02,231 THAT WAS WEIRD 968 00:45:02,264 --> 00:45:03,500 AND UNINFORMATIVE. 969 00:45:03,532 --> 00:45:06,135 WE GOT A PLAN "B"? 970 00:45:08,538 --> 00:45:10,873 THE HIPPO. 971 00:45:10,907 --> 00:45:12,976 WHAT ABOUT IT? 972 00:45:15,010 --> 00:45:16,512 MIKEY HAD HIM ON HIS BACKPACK. 973 00:45:16,545 --> 00:45:17,947 MAYBE THE HIPPO KNOWS SOMETHING. 974 00:45:17,981 --> 00:45:20,183 AW, YEAH. I MEAN, WHY NOT? 975 00:45:20,215 --> 00:45:21,083 WOULDN'T BE THE STRANGEST THING 976 00:45:21,117 --> 00:45:22,385 THAT'S HAPPENED IN THE PAST TWO DAYS. 977 00:45:22,418 --> 00:45:24,954 MM-MM. HEY! HEY, HIPPO! 978 00:45:27,456 --> 00:45:29,259 HE'S RUNNING. WE GOT A RUNNER! WE GOT A RUNNER! 979 00:45:38,333 --> 00:45:39,335 LOOK AT HIM. 980 00:45:39,369 --> 00:45:41,438 HE'S LIKE A FURRY, PURPLE NINJA IN THAT THING! 981 00:45:41,471 --> 00:45:43,907 LET'S GO! OH... 982 00:45:43,940 --> 00:45:45,876 - HE'S GETTING AWAY! - I SEE THAT. 983 00:45:51,815 --> 00:45:52,883 THIS IS THE WORST! 984 00:45:52,916 --> 00:45:55,452 NOPE! NO. THIS IS. UGH... 985 00:46:04,927 --> 00:46:06,496 - WAIT A SECOND. - YEAH? 986 00:46:06,528 --> 00:46:08,431 WHY ARE WE CHASING THE HIPPO AGAIN? 987 00:46:08,463 --> 00:46:09,331 BECAUSE HE RAN! 988 00:46:09,364 --> 00:46:11,033 MAYBE HE RAN BECAUSE WE'RE CHASING HIM. 989 00:46:11,067 --> 00:46:14,003 DON'T START THINKING ON ME NOW, MAN. LET'S GO! 990 00:46:14,036 --> 00:46:15,004 - ALRIGHT. OKAY. - YOU GOOD? 991 00:46:15,038 --> 00:46:16,206 YEAH. I'M OKAY. 992 00:46:25,914 --> 00:46:27,150 HEY! 993 00:46:27,182 --> 00:46:29,351 THIS IS THE BUMPER CARS, NOT A TRACK MEET. 994 00:46:29,385 --> 00:46:32,256 WANNA CROSS THE FLOOR? YOU GOTTA BUMP. 995 00:46:39,061 --> 00:46:40,429 - GO GET 'IM. - I'M TRYING! 996 00:46:44,099 --> 00:46:45,601 DUDE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 997 00:46:45,635 --> 00:46:47,571 IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. 998 00:46:47,603 --> 00:46:50,372 OH, OKAY. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 999 00:46:50,405 --> 00:46:51,407 IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. 1000 00:46:51,440 --> 00:46:52,474 MINE WAS AN ACCIDENT. 1001 00:46:52,507 --> 00:46:53,509 SO WAS MINE. 1002 00:46:53,543 --> 00:46:54,443 - SERIOUSLY? - SERIOUSLY! 1003 00:46:57,547 --> 00:46:59,416 HE'S GETTING AWAY. AGAIN! 1004 00:46:59,449 --> 00:47:01,985 - WHY IS HE ALWAYS RUNNING? - I DON'T KNOW. 1005 00:47:09,592 --> 00:47:12,996 SHORTCUT. POOL TIME. 1006 00:47:21,637 --> 00:47:23,405 OOF. 1007 00:47:23,438 --> 00:47:24,974 - THAT WAS-- - AWESOME. 1008 00:47:25,007 --> 00:47:26,542 - YES! - AHH! 1009 00:47:36,552 --> 00:47:38,422 NICE! 1010 00:47:39,655 --> 00:47:42,659 WELL, WELL, WELL! 1011 00:47:42,692 --> 00:47:44,394 WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE? 1012 00:47:44,427 --> 00:47:45,362 SERIOUSLY? 1013 00:47:45,394 --> 00:47:47,998 DOES THIS TOWN HAVE ANOTHER SECURITY GUARD? 1014 00:47:48,030 --> 00:47:49,331 SINCE WHEN DID YOU START WORKING AT FUNLAND? 1015 00:47:49,364 --> 00:47:51,500 SINCE I GOT FIRED FROM MY LAST JOB. 1016 00:47:51,534 --> 00:47:55,005 SOME SUDSY CLOWN THREW MY KEYS INTO A BUSH. 1017 00:47:55,038 --> 00:47:56,539 WHY WOULD-- WHY WOULD HE DO THAT? 1018 00:47:56,572 --> 00:47:57,974 I DON'T KNOW. 1019 00:47:58,007 --> 00:47:59,242 MAN. 1020 00:47:59,275 --> 00:48:01,077 BUT, PLEASE, WE HAVE TO TALK TO THAT-- 1021 00:48:02,311 --> 00:48:04,346 ...HIPPO. 1022 00:48:04,380 --> 00:48:06,983 HIPPO? OKAY. 1023 00:48:07,016 --> 00:48:09,385 YOU'RE COMING WITH ME, FELLAS. 1024 00:48:09,418 --> 00:48:11,520 PLEASE, THE HIPPO IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING! 1025 00:48:17,527 --> 00:48:20,297 OH, YOU'RE HOME LATE. HOW WAS YOUR DAY? 1026 00:48:20,329 --> 00:48:22,565 YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT IF I TOLD YOU. 1027 00:48:22,597 --> 00:48:23,565 HEY, BUDDY! 1028 00:48:23,599 --> 00:48:25,035 WHAT IS HE DOING HERE? 1029 00:48:25,068 --> 00:48:26,469 WE'RE JUST PUZZLING. 1030 00:48:26,501 --> 00:48:27,704 FINISHED! 1031 00:48:29,137 --> 00:48:30,239 LOVELY! LOOK, JACK. 1032 00:48:30,273 --> 00:48:32,643 MIKEY FINALLY FINISHED OUR PUZZLE. 1033 00:48:35,344 --> 00:48:37,012 WHY HAVEN'T YOU BROUGHT MIKEY AROUND HERE BEFORE? 1034 00:48:37,045 --> 00:48:38,681 HE IS A DOLL! 1035 00:48:38,715 --> 00:48:40,250 NO. 1036 00:48:40,282 --> 00:48:41,583 YOU ARE. 1037 00:48:41,617 --> 00:48:43,586 OH, HO, HO, HO! 1038 00:48:45,188 --> 00:48:47,456 I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR GAME IS-- 1039 00:48:47,489 --> 00:48:49,425 THIS ISN'T A GAME. IT'S A PUZZLE. 1040 00:48:49,458 --> 00:48:51,961 YEAH, I KNOW IT IS. 1041 00:48:51,994 --> 00:48:53,596 AND I'M GONNA FIGURE IT OUT. 1042 00:48:53,628 --> 00:48:55,397 I'M GONNA FIGURE IT ALL OUT. 1043 00:48:55,431 --> 00:48:57,233 HEY, SPORT, ARE YOU FEELING OKAY? 1044 00:48:57,266 --> 00:48:58,568 PULL UP A CHAIR, AMIGO. 1045 00:48:58,601 --> 00:49:00,170 WE SURE COULD USE YOUR HELP... 1046 00:49:00,202 --> 00:49:02,271 FOR THE NEXT ONE! 1047 00:49:03,472 --> 00:49:07,344 HOW DOES 5,000 PIECES OF SAND AND SKY SOUND? 1048 00:49:07,376 --> 00:49:10,045 SOUNDS LIKE I'M SLEEPIN' OVER. 1049 00:49:21,356 --> 00:49:23,092 UH, JACK? 1050 00:49:23,126 --> 00:49:25,195 CAN I HAVE A WORD WITH YOU? 1051 00:49:26,561 --> 00:49:28,531 SURE. WHY NOT? 1052 00:49:29,632 --> 00:49:32,302 LOOK, JACK, I PROBABLY SHOULDN'T SAY THIS, 1053 00:49:32,335 --> 00:49:34,170 BUT I'M REALLY ROOTING FOR YOU 1054 00:49:34,202 --> 00:49:36,306 TO WIN "STUDENT OF THE YEAR." 1055 00:49:36,338 --> 00:49:38,307 THANKS, PRINCIPAL KAR. 1056 00:49:38,340 --> 00:49:41,677 I MEAN, YOU WERE NEVER THAT IMPRESSIVE ON PAPER. 1057 00:49:41,710 --> 00:49:43,212 OR IN PERSON. 1058 00:49:43,246 --> 00:49:46,048 BUT SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE, 1059 00:49:46,081 --> 00:49:47,449 THE VALUES THAT I'VE TRIED TO INSTILL 1060 00:49:47,483 --> 00:49:49,019 AS THIS SCHOOL'S ADMINISTRATOR, 1061 00:49:49,052 --> 00:49:50,253 THEY GOT THROUGH TO YOU. 1062 00:49:50,286 --> 00:49:53,255 AND IF YOU WERE TO WIN THE AWARD, WELL... 1063 00:49:53,289 --> 00:49:56,159 IT WOULD BE SUCH AN INSPIRATION 1064 00:49:56,192 --> 00:49:59,329 TO ALL THE OTHER BELOW-AVERAGE JOES OUT THERE. 1065 00:49:59,362 --> 00:50:01,564 THANKS, PRINCIPAL KAR. 1066 00:50:01,597 --> 00:50:02,532 THAT SAID, 1067 00:50:02,565 --> 00:50:05,769 I'VE RECENTLY HEARD SOME DISTURBING RUMORS 1068 00:50:05,802 --> 00:50:06,870 ABOUT YOUR BEHAVIOR OUTSIDE OF SCHOOL. 1069 00:50:06,902 --> 00:50:10,439 IF THERE TURNS OUT TO BE ANY TRUTH TO THESE "RUMORS," 1070 00:50:10,472 --> 00:50:14,244 I'M AFRAID I'LL HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO DISQUALIFY YOU. 1071 00:50:14,277 --> 00:50:15,412 YEAH, YEAH. NO, NO PROBLEM. 1072 00:50:15,445 --> 00:50:17,080 I MEAN, I'M SURE THEY'RE JUST A-- 1073 00:50:17,112 --> 00:50:18,647 JUST A HARMLESS MISUNDERSTANDING. 1074 00:50:18,681 --> 00:50:20,317 I CERTAINLY HOPE SO. 1075 00:50:28,757 --> 00:50:31,493 THE HIPPO IS THE KEY TO EVERYTHING. 1076 00:50:31,527 --> 00:50:32,695 IF ONLY WE COULD JUST FIND HIM, 1077 00:50:32,728 --> 00:50:33,829 WE'D FINALLY HAVE SOME ANSWERS. 1078 00:50:33,862 --> 00:50:35,431 WE SHOULD GO TO THE ZOO. 1079 00:50:35,465 --> 00:50:37,500 THAT'S WHERE THE HIPPOS LIVE. 1080 00:50:38,501 --> 00:50:40,303 BAD NEWS, BUDDY. YOU'RE OUT. 1081 00:50:40,335 --> 00:50:42,571 HEY, IF ANYBODY HAD TO GET ME OUT, 1082 00:50:42,605 --> 00:50:43,740 I'M GLAD IT WAS YOU. 1083 00:50:43,773 --> 00:50:46,376 MIKEY'S THE BEST. 1084 00:50:46,409 --> 00:50:48,111 NO. MIKEY IS THE WORST. 1085 00:50:48,143 --> 00:50:50,846 RIGHT! BUT HE'S ALSO PRETTY GREAT. 1086 00:50:50,880 --> 00:50:52,182 LATER, MIKEY. 1087 00:50:52,215 --> 00:50:54,451 RED'S YOUR COLOR, BUDDY! 1088 00:50:55,518 --> 00:50:58,354 -: SORRY, YOU'RE OUT. - GOOD SHOT, MIKEY! 1089 00:51:02,657 --> 00:51:04,360 I HEARD PRINCIPAL KAR TALKED TO YOU TODAY. 1090 00:51:04,393 --> 00:51:05,695 IS EVERYTHING OKAY? 1091 00:51:07,163 --> 00:51:08,630 I AM GOING TO WIN STUDENT OF THE YEAR, 1092 00:51:08,664 --> 00:51:10,533 AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME. 1093 00:51:10,565 --> 00:51:13,369 WHY WOULD I WANT TO STOP YOU, FRIEND? 1094 00:51:43,798 --> 00:51:45,634 NO! 1095 00:51:45,668 --> 00:51:47,771 NO, NO, NO. 1096 00:51:50,206 --> 00:51:51,541 HE DOESN'T EVEN GO TO THIS SCHOOL! 1097 00:52:15,831 --> 00:52:16,865 PSST, JENNIFER-- 1098 00:52:16,898 --> 00:52:17,833 OH! SORRY. 1099 00:52:17,867 --> 00:52:19,235 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1100 00:52:19,268 --> 00:52:21,771 I JUST WANTED TO SAY SORRY... 1101 00:52:21,804 --> 00:52:23,806 YOU KNOW, GYM CLASS... 1102 00:52:23,838 --> 00:52:25,340 WHEN I HIT YOU IN THE GUTS 1103 00:52:25,373 --> 00:52:26,742 WITH THAT BALL-- 1104 00:52:26,775 --> 00:52:28,243 THAT WASN'T COOL. 1105 00:52:28,277 --> 00:52:29,110 OH... 1106 00:52:29,144 --> 00:52:30,679 SEE, I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT BE APOLOGIZING 1107 00:52:30,713 --> 00:52:34,684 FOR SNEAKING INTO MY HOUSE AND TRASHING OUR BATHROOM. 1108 00:52:34,717 --> 00:52:36,552 YEAH... RIGHT. 1109 00:52:36,585 --> 00:52:38,353 THAT. 1110 00:52:38,387 --> 00:52:42,358 UH, I'M ALSO VERY SORRY ABOUT THAT. 1111 00:52:42,391 --> 00:52:45,195 ALTHOUGH, YOUR SISTER GIVES ONE HECK OF A MAKEOVER. 1112 00:52:45,228 --> 00:52:46,963 JACK, WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU? 1113 00:52:46,996 --> 00:52:48,463 YOU KNOW, I WAS JUST STARTING 1114 00:52:48,496 --> 00:52:50,933 TO KIND OF MAYBE THINK YOU WERE CUTE, 1115 00:52:50,967 --> 00:52:52,367 AND THEN YOU WENT CRAZY. 1116 00:52:52,400 --> 00:52:53,702 YOU THOUGHT I WAS CUTE? 1117 00:52:53,735 --> 00:52:54,971 AND THEN YOU WENT 1118 00:52:55,003 --> 00:52:57,339 CRAZY. 1119 00:52:59,007 --> 00:53:00,409 IT'S JUST-- IT'S MIKEY. 1120 00:53:00,443 --> 00:53:01,744 HE'S GOT ME ALL MESSED UP. 1121 00:53:01,777 --> 00:53:03,746 WELL, I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WERE FRIENDS. 1122 00:53:03,778 --> 00:53:05,949 YOU'VE BEEN TUTORING HIM AND HANGING OUT WITH HIM, 1123 00:53:05,981 --> 00:53:08,750 AND YOU SAVED HIS DOG BY BUYING HIM A ROBOT TAIL! 1124 00:53:08,784 --> 00:53:09,818 RIGHT? 1125 00:53:09,851 --> 00:53:12,554 YEAH. YEAH, THAT'S ALL TRUE. 1126 00:53:12,588 --> 00:53:14,524 WELL, THEN WHY ARE YOU ACTING SO WEIRD? 1127 00:53:14,556 --> 00:53:17,226 CAN WE CHALK IT UP TO HORMONES? 1128 00:53:18,793 --> 00:53:19,895 HEY, I'M TALKING TO YOU. 1129 00:53:19,929 --> 00:53:20,997 YOU JUST REALIZED THAT? 1130 00:53:21,030 --> 00:53:22,999 NO, NO, I'M ACTUALLY TALKING TO YOU. 1131 00:53:23,032 --> 00:53:24,467 SEE, LIKE, USUALLY, ALL I CAN DO 1132 00:53:24,500 --> 00:53:27,237 IS, LIKE, BABBLE AND MAKE WEIRD NOISES. 1133 00:53:27,269 --> 00:53:28,704 HUH. 1134 00:53:28,737 --> 00:53:31,774 YOU'RE RIGHT. IT'S KINDA NICE. 1135 00:53:33,976 --> 00:53:36,479 SEEMS LIKE WE'RE HAVING A MOMENT... 1136 00:53:36,512 --> 00:53:38,481 AND I DON'T WANT TO RUIN IT, 1137 00:53:38,514 --> 00:53:39,749 SO I'M GONNA LEAVE. 1138 00:53:40,849 --> 00:53:42,251 GUESS I'LL SEE YOU 1139 00:53:42,284 --> 00:53:43,652 AT CAITLIN'S POOL PARTY THIS WEEKEND? 1140 00:53:43,686 --> 00:53:44,887 ACTUALLY, I WON'T BE THERE. 1141 00:53:44,920 --> 00:53:47,389 I'M VOLUNTEERING AT THE ANIMAL SHELTER ALL DAY WITH MIKEY. 1142 00:53:48,690 --> 00:53:50,426 MIKEY! 1143 00:53:52,961 --> 00:53:55,532 AND WE'RE BACK TO WEIRD. 1144 00:53:58,300 --> 00:53:59,969 HANNAH! DRIVE US TO FUNLAND. 1145 00:54:00,001 --> 00:54:01,670 "PLEASE?" 1146 00:54:02,672 --> 00:54:06,675 HANNAH, DRIVE US TO FUNLAND, PLEASE. 1147 00:54:06,708 --> 00:54:07,442 NO. 1148 00:54:07,476 --> 00:54:08,911 - COME ON! - WE CAN'T GO BACK THERE. 1149 00:54:08,943 --> 00:54:10,712 OTIS BANNED US FOR LIFE. 1150 00:54:10,746 --> 00:54:11,780 WE HAVE NO CHOICE. 1151 00:54:11,813 --> 00:54:13,649 IF WE WANT TO GET RID OF MIKEY ONCE AND FOR ALL, 1152 00:54:13,682 --> 00:54:14,784 WE HAVE TO FIND THAT PURPLE HIPPO. 1153 00:54:14,817 --> 00:54:16,452 ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT HURLEY? 1154 00:54:16,485 --> 00:54:18,521 WHAT? NO. WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A GIANT PURPLE HIPPO 1155 00:54:18,554 --> 00:54:20,356 WHO HANDS OUT BALLOONS AT FUNLAND. 1156 00:54:20,389 --> 00:54:21,524 YEAH. HIS NAME'S HURLEY. 1157 00:54:21,556 --> 00:54:23,025 AND HE DOESN'T HAND OUT BALLOONS. 1158 00:54:23,059 --> 00:54:25,028 UNLESS "BART THE BALLOON BABOON" 1159 00:54:25,061 --> 00:54:26,062 WAS SICK THAT DAY. 1160 00:54:26,094 --> 00:54:28,497 HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL THIS? 1161 00:54:28,530 --> 00:54:30,400 JACK, I WORKED THERE FOR TWO YEARS. 1162 00:54:30,432 --> 00:54:31,434 SERIOUSLY? 1163 00:54:31,467 --> 00:54:32,934 WHERE DID YOU THINK I WAS GOING FOR FOUR HOURS 1164 00:54:32,967 --> 00:54:34,336 EVERY DAY AFTER SCHOOL? 1165 00:54:34,369 --> 00:54:35,237 WELL, I DON'T KNOW, 1166 00:54:35,271 --> 00:54:36,706 I WAS JUST HAPPY YOU WERE OUT OF THE HOUSE. 1167 00:54:38,574 --> 00:54:41,478 HANNAH! HANNAH, PLEASE! 1168 00:54:44,447 --> 00:54:47,550 ALL I KNOW IS HURLEY'S MAIN HABITAT 1169 00:54:47,583 --> 00:54:49,385 IS THE JUNGLE MINI-GOLF COURSE. 1170 00:54:49,418 --> 00:54:51,387 THANK YOU. YOU ARE AMAZING. 1171 00:54:51,420 --> 00:54:52,521 I KNOW. 1172 00:54:53,489 --> 00:54:54,691 TO FUNLAND! 1173 00:54:54,724 --> 00:54:56,760 I TOLD YOU, I'M NOT TAKING YOU THERE. 1174 00:54:58,860 --> 00:55:00,696 TO THE BUS STOP! 1175 00:55:08,471 --> 00:55:09,771 I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS, JACK. 1176 00:55:09,804 --> 00:55:11,674 OTIS SAID NEVER TO COME BACK. 1177 00:55:12,907 --> 00:55:15,711 REALLY? YOU'RE GONNA LISTEN TO THAT GUY? 1178 00:55:20,148 --> 00:55:22,051 SWALLOW IT! SWALLOW IT. 1179 00:55:23,985 --> 00:55:25,521 GOOD BOY. 1180 00:55:26,889 --> 00:55:28,024 OKAY, LET'S GO. 1181 00:55:50,079 --> 00:55:52,048 REALLY? REALLY? OKAY. 1182 00:55:52,081 --> 00:55:55,785 - OKAY. YEAH. - OKAY. PLEASE KEEP IT TOGETHER. 1183 00:56:03,893 --> 00:56:06,496 IT'S, UH, HEH, SO TRANQUIL DOWN HERE. 1184 00:56:06,528 --> 00:56:09,532 TOTALLY NOT-- NOT CREEPY, AT ALL. 1185 00:56:11,065 --> 00:56:12,734 OKAY, OKAY, WOULD YOU RELAX? 1186 00:56:12,768 --> 00:56:15,771 THIS ISN'T GONNA TAKE LONG, OKAY? 1187 00:56:15,804 --> 00:56:19,541 IT'S NOT LIKE THAT HIPPO HAS MUCH ROOM TO... 1188 00:56:20,476 --> 00:56:21,577 ...HIDE. 1189 00:56:24,746 --> 00:56:27,048 QUIET! HE'LL HEAR US. 1190 00:56:27,081 --> 00:56:28,717 I WOULD JUST LIKE TO POINT OUT 1191 00:56:28,751 --> 00:56:30,086 THERE'S A NORTH AMERICAN GRIZZLY 1192 00:56:30,119 --> 00:56:32,755 HANGING OUT WITH A ZEBRA IN A SUBTERRANEAN JUNGLE. 1193 00:56:32,788 --> 00:56:35,056 WHAT KIND OF MADMAN DESIGNED THIS PLACE? 1194 00:56:35,090 --> 00:56:37,193 LET'S GO. 1195 00:56:37,226 --> 00:56:38,928 WALKING, WALKING... 1196 00:56:42,898 --> 00:56:44,634 HELLO, JACK. 1197 00:56:46,469 --> 00:56:47,836 YOU! 1198 00:56:47,869 --> 00:56:50,139 WHY HAVE YOU BEEN LOOKING FOR ME? 1199 00:56:51,574 --> 00:56:53,209 SHOW US YOUR FACE. 1200 00:56:53,242 --> 00:56:55,845 SILENCE! 1201 00:56:55,878 --> 00:56:58,748 I HAVE MANY FACES... AND MANY NAMES. 1202 00:56:58,780 --> 00:57:00,048 I DON'T LIKE THIS, JACK! 1203 00:57:00,081 --> 00:57:01,550 I DON'T LIKE THIS AT ALL. 1204 00:57:01,583 --> 00:57:03,118 DID YOU MAKE ALL OF MY LIES COME TRUE? 1205 00:57:03,152 --> 00:57:05,054 YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE! 1206 00:57:05,086 --> 00:57:08,523 YOUR LIES ARE COMING TRUE BECAUSE YOU TOLD THEM SO OFTEN, 1207 00:57:08,556 --> 00:57:10,992 THEY STOPPED BEING LIES. 1208 00:57:11,025 --> 00:57:12,527 HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP? 1209 00:57:12,561 --> 00:57:14,630 GOOD QUESTION. THAT'S A GOOD QUESTION. 1210 00:57:14,663 --> 00:57:16,632 WHY, THAT'S THE EASIEST PART OF ALL, JACK. 1211 00:57:16,664 --> 00:57:19,235 YOU MUST SIMPLY CONFESS. 1212 00:57:19,268 --> 00:57:21,570 CONFESS? CONFESS WHAT? 1213 00:57:21,603 --> 00:57:22,871 EVERYTHING! 1214 00:57:23,905 --> 00:57:26,942 THE ONLY WAY TO FIGHT LIES IS WITH THE TRUTH. 1215 00:57:26,976 --> 00:57:29,679 YOU MUST CONFESS TO EVERYONE THAT YOU'VE HURT. 1216 00:57:29,711 --> 00:57:31,614 EVERYONE YOU'VE MISLED. 1217 00:57:31,646 --> 00:57:35,550 EVERYONE YOU'VE EVER DECEIVED WITH YOUR LIES. 1218 00:57:35,583 --> 00:57:36,985 YEAH, I CAN'T DO THAT. 1219 00:57:37,018 --> 00:57:38,153 JACK! 1220 00:57:38,186 --> 00:57:39,621 WHAT? WHAT, RYAN? 1221 00:57:39,655 --> 00:57:41,958 OKAY, YOU WANT ME TO THROW EVERYTHING AWAY? 1222 00:57:41,990 --> 00:57:44,527 STUDENT OF THE YEAR? THE RED SOX? 1223 00:57:44,559 --> 00:57:46,962 BECAUSE SOME PURPLE HIPPO TOLD ME TO? 1224 00:57:46,996 --> 00:57:48,965 YES! THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT YOU SHOULD DO. 1225 00:57:48,998 --> 00:57:49,999 BE WARNED-- 1226 00:57:50,032 --> 00:57:52,268 THE LONGER YOU REFUSE TO CONFESS, 1227 00:57:52,300 --> 00:57:54,737 THE WORSE THINGS WILL GET. 1228 00:57:54,769 --> 00:57:56,771 HOW COULD THIS POSSIBLY GET WORSE? 1229 00:57:56,804 --> 00:58:00,576 : YOU'LL SEE. 1230 00:58:00,608 --> 00:58:03,246 "CONFESS"? REALLY? 1231 00:58:03,278 --> 00:58:05,748 THAT'S THE BIG SOLUTION? 1232 00:58:05,780 --> 00:58:08,817 HOW GULLIBLE DOES THIS HIPPO THINK I... AM? 1233 00:58:10,885 --> 00:58:13,154 - HEY, RYAN? - YEAH? 1234 00:58:13,188 --> 00:58:14,123 YOU REMEMBER ON MY LIST? 1235 00:58:14,155 --> 00:58:16,192 THERE WAS THAT TIME I WAS LATE MEETING ERIC, 1236 00:58:16,224 --> 00:58:18,060 AND I BLAMED IT ON ALIENS? 1237 00:58:22,063 --> 00:58:24,132 NO. HEH. NOPE! I-I DON'T REMEMBER. 1238 00:58:24,166 --> 00:58:26,102 I-I REFUSE TO REMEMBER. 1239 00:58:26,135 --> 00:58:27,870 WELL, TOO LATE. 1240 00:58:27,902 --> 00:58:29,204 I THINK WE'RE ABOUT TO BE ABDUCTED. 1241 00:58:29,237 --> 00:58:31,740 NO! SEE, THERE'S-- THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS ALIENS, 1242 00:58:31,773 --> 00:58:34,277 THOSE ARE JUST TWO GUYS, YOU KNOW, WEARING WEIRD SUITS, 1243 00:58:34,309 --> 00:58:36,711 STANDING ON TOP OF A ROOF. 1244 00:58:36,744 --> 00:58:38,280 AND RUNNING DOWN IT! 1245 00:58:47,889 --> 00:58:49,826 RUN! 1246 00:58:56,364 --> 00:58:58,233 OH! IN HERE! 1247 00:59:28,163 --> 00:59:30,099 OKAY. THEY'RE GONE. 1248 00:59:30,132 --> 00:59:32,735 YEAH. UGH... 1249 00:59:33,869 --> 00:59:35,271 OHH... OKAY. 1250 00:59:35,304 --> 00:59:37,173 I JUST NEED, LIKE, TWO MINUTES 1251 00:59:37,206 --> 00:59:39,943 WITHOUT COMING FACE-TO-FACE WITH ONE OF MY LIES. 1252 00:59:42,110 --> 00:59:43,712 DID YOU THINK YOU COULD GET AWAY FROM US THAT EASY? 1253 00:59:43,746 --> 00:59:45,381 WHAT PART OF THIS SEEMS EASY? 1254 00:59:45,414 --> 00:59:47,984 TIME TO FINISH THIS. 1255 00:59:48,016 --> 00:59:50,085 SHOULDN'T YOU GUYS BE OUT RIDING MOOSE OR SOMETHING? 1256 00:59:50,119 --> 00:59:52,254 MOOSE-RIDING SEASON ISN'T TILL OCTOBER. 1257 00:59:52,286 --> 00:59:53,755 THIS IS OAK SEASON... 1258 00:59:53,789 --> 00:59:55,291 POPLAR SEASON, 1259 00:59:55,324 --> 00:59:56,992 AND BUTT-KICKIN' SEASON. 1260 00:59:57,025 --> 00:59:59,228 OH, AND ALSO NORWAY SPRUCE. 1261 00:59:59,260 --> 01:00:00,362 AND ALSO NORWAY SPRUCE. 1262 01:00:01,697 --> 01:00:03,365 HOW ABOUT, THIS TIME, YOU DISTRACT THEM 1263 01:00:03,398 --> 01:00:04,733 AND I RUN? 1264 01:00:04,766 --> 01:00:06,067 HOW ABOUT WE BOTH RUN? 1265 01:00:06,101 --> 01:00:07,303 - DEAL! - OKAY! 1266 01:00:11,005 --> 01:00:13,942 HEY! THIS PARKING STRUCTURE IS FOR PAYING CUSTOMERS ONLY! 1267 01:00:13,976 --> 01:00:16,012 YOU TWO ARE TRESPASSING. 1268 01:00:16,045 --> 01:00:17,780 YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. ELEVATOR! GO! 1269 01:00:17,813 --> 01:00:20,817 I HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO CALL THE AUTHORITIES! 1270 01:00:22,717 --> 01:00:24,186 COME ON. COME ON. 1271 01:00:26,054 --> 01:00:27,389 OW! GEEZ. 1272 01:00:27,422 --> 01:00:28,690 NOT AGAIN. 1273 01:00:28,724 --> 01:00:29,826 COME ON! 1274 01:00:37,166 --> 01:00:39,301 WE'RE GOING UP. WHY ARE WE GOING UP? 1275 01:00:39,333 --> 01:00:40,201 I DON'T KNOW. 1276 01:00:40,235 --> 01:00:41,403 I JUST PUSHED THE FIRST BUTTON I SAW! 1277 01:00:41,436 --> 01:00:43,672 WE'LL BE TRAPPED ON THE ROOF. 1278 01:00:43,706 --> 01:00:46,307 WHO BUILDS PARKING GARAGES 1279 01:00:46,340 --> 01:00:47,108 OUT OF CEMENT? 1280 01:00:47,141 --> 01:00:48,844 THESE BOOTS AREN'T MADE FOR RUNNING! 1281 01:00:48,876 --> 01:00:51,447 : THE LUMBERJACKS! 1282 01:00:51,480 --> 01:00:53,282 GET THAT KID! 1283 01:00:58,353 --> 01:01:00,856 I CAN'T BUST THROUGH! 1284 01:01:00,889 --> 01:01:04,059 THIS KID IS SERIOUSLY STEPPING UP HIS BARRICADIN'. 1285 01:01:04,092 --> 01:01:05,094 YEAH, HE IS. 1286 01:01:05,126 --> 01:01:07,996 WHERE TO NOW? 1287 01:01:08,030 --> 01:01:09,098 OH! THE FIRE ESCAPE. GO! 1288 01:01:09,130 --> 01:01:11,466 PLEASE LET THERE BE A FIRE ESCAPE. 1289 01:01:11,500 --> 01:01:14,070 - I'LL GET YOU. - LET'S GO. THIS WAY! 1290 01:01:17,139 --> 01:01:19,041 NOPE! 1291 01:01:20,976 --> 01:01:22,744 NO PLACE TO RUN NOW! 1292 01:01:22,777 --> 01:01:24,312 I GOT YOU. 1293 01:01:24,346 --> 01:01:25,947 OH, MAN. 1294 01:01:25,981 --> 01:01:28,150 NOT TILL WE POUND HIM INTO SAWDUST! 1295 01:01:28,182 --> 01:01:29,284 QUICK! 1296 01:01:29,318 --> 01:01:30,953 LIE ABOUT A HELICOPTER. 1297 01:01:30,985 --> 01:01:32,087 I DON'T THINK IT WORKS THAT WAY. 1298 01:01:32,121 --> 01:01:33,189 WELL, THEN, HOW DOES IT WORK, JACK? 1299 01:01:33,222 --> 01:01:34,490 COME ON, TELL ME. 1300 01:01:34,523 --> 01:01:37,259 I'M SURE THE GREAT JACK PARKER CAN THINK OF A WAY OUT OF THIS. 1301 01:01:42,764 --> 01:01:44,432 GET IN! 1302 01:01:44,465 --> 01:01:45,400 THANKS! 1303 01:01:48,003 --> 01:01:50,139 THANKS, LISA. YOU'RE THE BEST! 1304 01:01:51,172 --> 01:01:52,140 NOT YOU! 1305 01:01:52,173 --> 01:01:53,208 WHAT? 1306 01:01:53,242 --> 01:01:54,810 YOU BROKE MY HEART, JACKIE BEAR. 1307 01:01:54,842 --> 01:01:56,010 LISA, PLEASE! 1308 01:01:56,043 --> 01:01:58,213 WHATEVER YOU WANT, I'LL MAKE IT UP TO YOU. 1309 01:02:02,016 --> 01:02:03,918 YOU'RE JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE YOU'RE SELFISH 1310 01:02:03,952 --> 01:02:04,920 AND YOU DON'T WANT 1311 01:02:04,952 --> 01:02:06,989 YOUR BRAINS SUCKED OUT OF YOUR SKULL BY ALIENS. 1312 01:02:07,021 --> 01:02:08,257 OKAY, WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY? 1313 01:02:08,289 --> 01:02:09,525 THE TRUTH. 1314 01:02:09,557 --> 01:02:11,193 WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE WITH ME? 1315 01:02:19,333 --> 01:02:24,005 I-- I MADE YOU UP SO MY FRIENDS WOULDN'T MAKE FUN OF ME. 1316 01:02:25,507 --> 01:02:27,175 GET IN. 1317 01:02:27,208 --> 01:02:28,844 THANK YOU! 1318 01:02:28,876 --> 01:02:30,346 OKAY, GO. GO! 1319 01:02:42,224 --> 01:02:44,193 DAGNABBIT! 1320 01:03:03,211 --> 01:03:04,380 THANK YOU 1321 01:03:04,413 --> 01:03:05,514 FOR SAVING US. 1322 01:03:05,547 --> 01:03:08,116 WE'D PROBABLY BE GETTING PROBED BY ALIENS RIGHT NOW 1323 01:03:08,150 --> 01:03:09,050 IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU. 1324 01:03:09,085 --> 01:03:12,054 I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU LOVE TROUBLE, JACKIE. 1325 01:03:12,086 --> 01:03:13,588 SOMEONE'S GOT TO WATCH OUT FOR YOU. 1326 01:03:13,621 --> 01:03:16,925 LISTEN, I'M SORRY I LIED TO YOU. 1327 01:03:16,958 --> 01:03:18,993 I NEVER, EVER MEANT TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS. 1328 01:03:19,027 --> 01:03:20,929 IT'S JUST... 1329 01:03:20,963 --> 01:03:23,231 I'M KIND OF INTO SOMEONE ELSE. 1330 01:03:23,264 --> 01:03:25,934 IF YOU LIKE THIS SOMEONE ELSE SO MUCH, JACKIE BEAR, 1331 01:03:25,967 --> 01:03:27,402 JUST TRY BEING HONEST WITH HER. 1332 01:03:27,436 --> 01:03:30,506 NO ONE WANTS A RELATIONSHIP BUILT ON LIES. 1333 01:03:41,083 --> 01:03:43,619 WELL, IT'S TIME FOR ME TO GO. 1334 01:03:43,652 --> 01:03:46,255 TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. 1335 01:03:53,929 --> 01:03:55,097 THAT WAS NUTS. 1336 01:03:55,130 --> 01:03:57,066 I KNOW, BUT IT WORKED. 1337 01:03:57,099 --> 01:03:58,367 I MEAN, YOU WERE HONEST WITH LISA, 1338 01:03:58,400 --> 01:03:59,101 AND SHE LEFT. 1339 01:03:59,134 --> 01:04:01,637 THE HIPPO SPEAKS THE TRUTH. 1340 01:04:01,670 --> 01:04:03,038 NOW YOU JUST NEED TO DO THE SAME THING 1341 01:04:03,070 --> 01:04:05,141 AND WE CAN END ALL THIS. 1342 01:04:06,942 --> 01:04:08,510 JACK... 1343 01:04:08,543 --> 01:04:09,577 AW, JACK! 1344 01:04:09,610 --> 01:04:12,114 I'M JUST SO CLOSE, RYAN. 1345 01:04:12,146 --> 01:04:14,949 STUDENT OF THE YEAR GETS ANNOUNCED TOMORROW. 1346 01:04:14,983 --> 01:04:16,051 ARE YOU CRAZY? 1347 01:04:16,083 --> 01:04:17,518 AFTER EVERYTHING WE'VE BEEN THROUGH? 1348 01:04:17,552 --> 01:04:19,488 THE HIPPO SAID I HAD TO CONFESS TO EVERYONE. 1349 01:04:19,521 --> 01:04:20,589 HE DIDN'T SAY WHEN. 1350 01:04:20,621 --> 01:04:23,192 I'LL JUST DO IT AFTER I WIN "STUDENT OF THE YEAR." 1351 01:04:23,224 --> 01:04:24,993 NO, YOU'LL DO IT TOMORROW. 1352 01:04:25,027 --> 01:04:26,095 AT THE ASSEMBLY! 1353 01:04:26,128 --> 01:04:27,596 YOU CAN TELL EVERYONE AT ONCE AND BE DONE WITH IT. 1354 01:04:27,628 --> 01:04:28,596 OKAY, WHAT ABOUT THE SOX? 1355 01:04:28,630 --> 01:04:30,266 THERE'S MORE IMPORTANT THINGS THAN THE SOX! 1356 01:04:30,298 --> 01:04:31,166 NOT TO ME. 1357 01:04:31,199 --> 01:04:33,501 IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT YOU! 1358 01:04:33,534 --> 01:04:36,404 I THOUGHT YOU HAD MY BACK. 1359 01:04:36,438 --> 01:04:37,673 ARE YOU FOR REAL? 1360 01:04:37,706 --> 01:04:40,442 I GOT HUMILIATED FOR YOU. 1361 01:04:40,474 --> 01:04:41,576 I GOT WEDGIED FOR YOU! 1362 01:04:41,610 --> 01:04:44,546 I VIOLATED EVERY RULE IN THE FUNLAND CODE OF CONDUCT 1363 01:04:44,579 --> 01:04:45,581 FOR YOU! 1364 01:04:45,614 --> 01:04:48,250 I ALWAYS HAVE YOUR BACK! 1365 01:04:48,282 --> 01:04:50,451 I'M STARTING TO WONDER IF YOU HAVE MINE. 1366 01:04:50,485 --> 01:04:52,221 COME ON, RYAN. 1367 01:04:52,253 --> 01:04:54,289 AND THERE'S ALIENS NOW, DUDE. 1368 01:04:54,322 --> 01:04:55,456 ALIENS! 1369 01:04:55,489 --> 01:04:58,026 IF I COME CLEAN, 1370 01:04:58,059 --> 01:05:01,396 I WILL LOSE EVERYTHING. 1371 01:05:02,530 --> 01:05:04,432 MAYBE YOU ALREADY HAVE. 1372 01:05:06,969 --> 01:05:09,171 RYAN. 1373 01:05:23,284 --> 01:05:25,353 MOM? 1374 01:05:25,387 --> 01:05:27,456 DAD? 1375 01:05:27,489 --> 01:05:29,590 HANNAH? 1376 01:05:29,623 --> 01:05:32,060 IS ANYBODY HOME? 1377 01:05:32,094 --> 01:05:34,195 : HEY, SWEETIE! HOW WAS YOUR DAY? 1378 01:05:34,228 --> 01:05:37,465 A COMPLETE DISASTER. 1379 01:05:37,498 --> 01:05:40,735 I REALLY JUST DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. 1380 01:05:40,768 --> 01:05:42,403 WHAT'S UP, SPORT? 1381 01:05:42,436 --> 01:05:44,605 TAN, HE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. 1382 01:05:44,639 --> 01:05:46,208 "TAN"? 1383 01:05:50,144 --> 01:05:52,181 H-- HI. 1384 01:05:52,213 --> 01:05:53,382 WHERE ARE MY PARENTS? 1385 01:05:53,414 --> 01:05:56,085 HONEY, WE ARE YOUR PARENTS. 1386 01:05:56,117 --> 01:05:59,121 UH, YOU ARE NOT MY PARENTS. 1387 01:05:59,153 --> 01:06:01,356 JACK, WE MAY NOT BE YOUR BIRTH PARENTS, 1388 01:06:01,389 --> 01:06:05,293 BUT WE LOVE YOU JUST AS MUCH AS THEY EVER COULD. 1389 01:06:10,364 --> 01:06:12,600 THE CHINESE NEW YEAR LIE. 1390 01:06:13,668 --> 01:06:15,137 IT CAME TRUE. 1391 01:06:15,170 --> 01:06:17,740 I'VE BEEN ADOPTED BY ASIAN PARENTS. 1392 01:06:17,773 --> 01:06:19,408 THAT MEANS-- 1393 01:06:19,440 --> 01:06:21,276 MOM! DAD! 1394 01:06:24,112 --> 01:06:25,715 NO. 1395 01:06:29,284 --> 01:06:31,153 WHERE'S HANNAH? 1396 01:06:32,820 --> 01:06:34,155 HANNAH? 1397 01:07:00,581 --> 01:07:03,219 : LITTLE LATE FOR BATTING PRACTICE, ISN'T IT, KID? 1398 01:07:07,621 --> 01:07:09,759 HEY, YOU OKAY? 1399 01:07:10,858 --> 01:07:13,094 NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT. 1400 01:07:13,128 --> 01:07:15,831 I RUINED EVERYTHING. 1401 01:07:15,864 --> 01:07:17,699 I HURT EVERYONE I LOVE. 1402 01:07:17,731 --> 01:07:20,469 AND... FOR WHAT? 1403 01:07:21,469 --> 01:07:25,106 SO PEOPLE WOULD THINK I WAS COOL? 1404 01:07:25,139 --> 01:07:27,509 SO... SO PEOPLE WOULD LIKE ME? 1405 01:07:27,541 --> 01:07:30,612 SO I COULD BE THE BAT BOY FOR THE RED SOX? 1406 01:07:32,347 --> 01:07:36,351 NONE OF THAT MEANS ANYTHING ANYMORE. 1407 01:07:36,384 --> 01:07:37,853 THAT RED SOX THING SOUNDS PRETTY GOOD. 1408 01:07:37,885 --> 01:07:40,255 IT SOUNDS GREAT. 1409 01:07:40,288 --> 01:07:43,592 BUT IS IT WORTH LOSING YOUR FRIENDS AND YOUR FAMILY 1410 01:07:43,625 --> 01:07:46,195 AND THE... 1411 01:07:46,228 --> 01:07:48,597 THE GIRL YOU'VE BEEN CRUSHING ON 1412 01:07:48,630 --> 01:07:50,365 SINCE GRADE SCHOOL? 1413 01:07:51,766 --> 01:07:53,202 WHEN YOU PUT IT THAT WAY... 1414 01:07:53,235 --> 01:07:55,604 I WOULD DO... 1415 01:07:55,637 --> 01:07:58,707 ANYTHING TO FIX IT. 1416 01:08:16,291 --> 01:08:19,228 DANNY KOSTAS? 1417 01:08:19,261 --> 01:08:21,463 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1418 01:08:21,496 --> 01:08:22,898 SAME THING YOU'RE DOING HERE. 1419 01:08:22,930 --> 01:08:24,465 WORKING THROUGH A SLUMP. 1420 01:08:24,498 --> 01:08:26,300 WHAT BETTER PLACE TO DO IT 1421 01:08:26,333 --> 01:08:27,802 THAN THE PARK WHERE I LEARNED TO PLAY BALL? 1422 01:08:32,673 --> 01:08:34,609 I JUST... 1423 01:08:34,643 --> 01:08:37,313 I DON'T KNOW HOW TO GET OUT OF THIS ONE. 1424 01:08:38,445 --> 01:08:41,916 THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO GET OUT OF A SLUMP, KID. 1425 01:08:41,949 --> 01:08:43,417 KEEP SWINGING. 1426 01:08:43,451 --> 01:08:45,887 YOU STOP SWINGING... YOU'LL NEVER WIN. 1427 01:08:48,856 --> 01:08:50,792 YOU'RE RIGHT. 1428 01:08:50,824 --> 01:08:52,594 DANNY KOSTAS, YOU'RE RIGHT. 1429 01:08:52,627 --> 01:08:54,163 IT'S LIKE-- IT'S LIKE THE HIPPO SAID. 1430 01:08:54,195 --> 01:08:55,463 - HIPPO? - LONG STORY. 1431 01:08:55,497 --> 01:08:57,798 I'M GONNA DO IT. I'M GONNA SWING FOR THE FENCES. 1432 01:08:57,832 --> 01:08:59,535 THANK YOU, DANNY KOSTAS! 1433 01:08:59,568 --> 01:09:01,904 CAN I CALL YOU "DANNY"? I'M GONNA CALL YOU "DANNY." 1434 01:09:03,805 --> 01:09:06,240 BY THE WAY, UH, "DANNY"-- 1435 01:09:06,274 --> 01:09:08,177 YOU'RE STEPPING IN THE BUCKET. 1436 01:09:08,210 --> 01:09:09,578 THAT'S WHY YOU'RE PULLING TO THE LEFT. 1437 01:09:26,728 --> 01:09:28,363 WELL, I'LL BE. 1438 01:09:28,395 --> 01:09:30,599 I WAS STEPPING IN THE BUCKET. 1439 01:09:49,516 --> 01:09:51,452 DUDE, WHERE'S JACK? 1440 01:09:51,485 --> 01:09:52,753 HE'S GONNA MISS HIS OWN VICTORY SPEECH. 1441 01:09:52,787 --> 01:09:55,724 WELL, I GUESS WE SHOULD GET STARTED. 1442 01:09:55,756 --> 01:09:56,857 AHEM. 1443 01:09:56,890 --> 01:09:58,693 "STUDENT OF THE YEAR" 1444 01:09:58,726 --> 01:10:01,662 IS OUR SCHOOL'S MOST PRESTIGIOUS HONOR. 1445 01:10:01,695 --> 01:10:05,000 IT IS DECIDED BY A PANEL OF TEACHERS, 1446 01:10:05,033 --> 01:10:06,368 THE STUDENT COUNCIL, 1447 01:10:06,400 --> 01:10:07,568 AND, OF COURSE, YOURS TRULY. 1448 01:10:09,970 --> 01:10:11,906 HMM. 1449 01:10:11,939 --> 01:10:15,743 EVERYONE UP HERE IS A WINNER. 1450 01:10:15,777 --> 01:10:19,881 IT'S JUST THAT SOME WINNERS WIN MORE THAN OTHERS. 1451 01:10:19,913 --> 01:10:21,315 AND NOW, 1452 01:10:21,349 --> 01:10:23,953 THE MOMENT WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR... 1453 01:10:26,320 --> 01:10:30,391 THIS YEAR'S STUDENT OF THE YEAR IS... 1454 01:10:31,893 --> 01:10:34,930 JACK PARKER-R-R-R-! 1455 01:11:41,829 --> 01:11:43,899 I'D LIKE TO THANK YOU ALL FOR THIS HONOR. 1456 01:11:43,931 --> 01:11:46,734 I KNOW MIKEY WOULD LIKE TO THANK YOU, TOO. 1457 01:11:49,938 --> 01:11:52,708 IF... HE WAS REAL. 1458 01:11:58,613 --> 01:12:00,981 BUT, UH... HE ISN'T. 1459 01:12:03,585 --> 01:12:05,520 WHAT IS HE DOING? 1460 01:12:05,552 --> 01:12:08,390 TELLING THE TRUTH. 1461 01:12:08,422 --> 01:12:10,858 MIKEY NEVER REALLY EXISTED. 1462 01:12:10,891 --> 01:12:13,394 I... I MADE HIM UP, 1463 01:12:13,427 --> 01:12:15,596 ALONG WITH A BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF-- 1464 01:12:15,630 --> 01:12:19,768 THE LUMBERJACKS, MY HOT ARIZONA GIRLFRIEND, 1465 01:12:19,801 --> 01:12:22,504 ALIENS, MIKEY'S BIONIC DOG, 1466 01:12:22,537 --> 01:12:26,007 MY WRESTLER UNCLE, MY ASIAN PARENTS, 1467 01:12:26,039 --> 01:12:27,609 BEARS... 1468 01:12:27,641 --> 01:12:30,444 WELL, I DIDN'T REALLY MAKE UP BEARS. 1469 01:12:30,478 --> 01:12:31,712 THERE'S BEARS. 1470 01:12:31,746 --> 01:12:34,548 JUST NOT AT THE CONVENTION CENTER. 1471 01:12:36,551 --> 01:12:38,453 AS ALONG AS I'M BEING HONEST, 1472 01:12:38,485 --> 01:12:41,856 I HAVEN'T BEEN VERY HONEST. 1473 01:12:41,890 --> 01:12:45,160 I, UH, I THOUGHT I WAS MAKING PEOPLE HAPPY 1474 01:12:45,193 --> 01:12:48,497 AND GETTING WHAT I WANT. 1475 01:12:48,529 --> 01:12:52,099 I DIDN'T REALIZE I WAS... 1476 01:12:52,132 --> 01:12:55,069 HURTING THE PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT. 1477 01:12:57,439 --> 01:12:59,541 I JUST WANT TO SAY... 1478 01:13:02,911 --> 01:13:04,880 I'M SORRY. 1479 01:13:04,912 --> 01:13:08,716 I DIDN'T DESERVE TO BE NOMINATED FOR THIS AWARD, 1480 01:13:08,750 --> 01:13:10,452 AND I... 1481 01:13:10,484 --> 01:13:13,654 DEFINITELY DON'T DESERVE TO WIN IT. 1482 01:13:23,163 --> 01:13:25,099 I KNOW I'M IN TROUBLE. 1483 01:13:25,132 --> 01:13:26,867 GIVE ME DETENTION. 1484 01:13:26,900 --> 01:13:28,869 SUSPEND ME. WHATEVER YOU NEED TO DO. 1485 01:13:28,903 --> 01:13:32,975 THIS IS A DARK DAY FOR THE BELOW-AVERAGE JOE. 1486 01:13:38,046 --> 01:13:39,481 WELL... 1487 01:13:39,514 --> 01:13:41,949 I GUESS 1488 01:13:41,983 --> 01:13:45,186 THIS YEAR'S AWARD NOW GOES TO OUR RUNNER-UP... 1489 01:13:46,253 --> 01:13:48,457 STEPHANIE MILLER. 1490 01:13:48,489 --> 01:13:50,724 YES! YES! 1491 01:13:50,757 --> 01:13:52,993 OH! I DID IT. I WON! 1492 01:13:53,027 --> 01:13:54,663 IN YOUR FACE, PARKER! 1493 01:13:54,695 --> 01:13:57,966 PUBLIC LIBRARY, HERE I COME! 1494 01:13:57,998 --> 01:14:01,168 YES! I WON! 1495 01:14:01,202 --> 01:14:03,038 I'D LIKE TO THANK ALL MY FRIENDS 1496 01:14:03,070 --> 01:14:04,706 FOR NOT DISTRACTING ME DURING MY STUDY TIME 1497 01:14:04,738 --> 01:14:05,807 AND MY MOM. 1498 01:14:19,153 --> 01:14:20,956 HEY. 1499 01:14:20,988 --> 01:14:22,957 HEY. 1500 01:14:24,591 --> 01:14:26,862 SO... 1501 01:14:28,162 --> 01:14:29,998 YEAH. 1502 01:14:30,030 --> 01:14:31,899 ME TOO. 1503 01:14:34,969 --> 01:14:37,773 YOU DID IT, MAN. IT'S ALL OVER. 1504 01:14:38,805 --> 01:14:40,641 YEP. 1505 01:14:40,675 --> 01:14:43,177 IT'S ALL OVER. 1506 01:14:43,211 --> 01:14:45,881 EXCEPT WHAT'S HE STILL DOING HERE? 1507 01:14:45,913 --> 01:14:47,148 HEY, BUDDY. WHERE YOU BEEN? 1508 01:14:49,783 --> 01:14:51,685 NO. I DID IT. I DID WHAT THE HIPPO SAID! 1509 01:14:51,719 --> 01:14:52,921 YOU SHOULDN'T BE HERE! YOU SHOULD BE GONE. 1510 01:14:52,953 --> 01:14:54,788 OH, I CAN'T LEAVE YET, JACK. 1511 01:14:54,822 --> 01:14:57,292 THERE'S STILL ONE MORE THING WE NEED TO DO. 1512 01:14:57,324 --> 01:15:00,194 THERE THEY ARE! 1513 01:15:00,228 --> 01:15:02,564 BUT I TOLD THE TRUTH! 1514 01:15:02,596 --> 01:15:04,099 WELL, OBVIOUSLY, THEY DIDN'T HEAR IT. 1515 01:15:06,167 --> 01:15:07,803 - DUDE? YEP. - ON IT! 1516 01:15:19,680 --> 01:15:20,848 - OTHER WAY. - OTHER WAY! 1517 01:15:29,056 --> 01:15:31,592 PLEASE, SON, COME BACK TO US. 1518 01:15:31,626 --> 01:15:32,561 JACKIE-BEAR! 1519 01:15:32,594 --> 01:15:35,963 I CHANGED MY MIND. I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU. 1520 01:15:36,997 --> 01:15:38,032 YO, JACK. 1521 01:16:01,722 --> 01:16:03,926 HELLO, JACK! 1522 01:16:05,359 --> 01:16:06,827 NO. 1523 01:16:06,860 --> 01:16:08,729 NO! WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME? 1524 01:16:08,762 --> 01:16:10,832 YOU SAID IF I TOLD THE TRUTH, 1525 01:16:10,864 --> 01:16:12,099 ALL OF MY LIES WOULD GO AWAY! 1526 01:16:12,132 --> 01:16:13,134 BUT YOU LIED! 1527 01:16:13,167 --> 01:16:14,769 YOU'RE THE LIAR! 1528 01:16:14,801 --> 01:16:17,137 NOW WE'RE ABOUT TO BE KILLED BY ALIEN LUMBERJACKS! 1529 01:16:17,171 --> 01:16:17,972 SILENCE! 1530 01:16:18,005 --> 01:16:19,975 HERE'S HOW THE TRUTH SETS YOU FREE. 1531 01:16:23,110 --> 01:16:24,746 CALM DOWN. 1532 01:16:26,146 --> 01:16:27,181 HANNAH? 1533 01:16:29,850 --> 01:16:31,286 I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONE FOREVER! 1534 01:16:31,319 --> 01:16:32,721 OKAY, WE HAVE TO GET OUTTA HERE. 1535 01:16:32,753 --> 01:16:35,157 THERE ARE ALIENS AND LUMBERJACKS OUT THERE! 1536 01:16:36,423 --> 01:16:37,859 NO. NO-NO-NO-NO-NO! 1537 01:16:37,891 --> 01:16:40,095 - PLEASE DON'T OPEN THE-- - NO! 1538 01:16:43,296 --> 01:16:44,832 JACK. 1539 01:16:44,865 --> 01:16:46,301 JACK, WHAT IS HAPPENING? 1540 01:16:46,333 --> 01:16:47,735 DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING? 1541 01:16:47,769 --> 01:16:49,003 I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING! 1542 01:16:49,037 --> 01:16:50,672 YOUR LIES WEREN'T REALLY COMING TRUE. 1543 01:16:50,704 --> 01:16:52,140 WHAT? 1544 01:16:55,409 --> 01:16:57,144 HOW? 1545 01:16:59,313 --> 01:17:01,016 YOU DIDN'T THINK 1546 01:17:01,048 --> 01:17:03,083 YOU WERE THE ONLY ONE THAT COULD TELL A LIE, 1547 01:17:03,117 --> 01:17:04,185 DID YOU? 1548 01:17:04,217 --> 01:17:05,753 YOU DID THIS? 1549 01:17:05,787 --> 01:17:07,789 ALL OF THIS? 1550 01:17:07,822 --> 01:17:08,823 - NO! - NO... 1551 01:17:08,855 --> 01:17:10,891 - YEP. - WHY? 1552 01:17:10,925 --> 01:17:13,094 I WAS SO SICK OF YOU LYING 1553 01:17:13,127 --> 01:17:16,164 AND ALWAYS GETTING AWAY WITH IT, 1554 01:17:16,197 --> 01:17:18,967 SO I RECRUITED A FEW FRIENDS FROM MY ACTING CLASS, 1555 01:17:19,000 --> 01:17:20,769 AND MY PLAN CAME TOGETHER. 1556 01:17:20,801 --> 01:17:21,902 I EXPLAINED TO THEM 1557 01:17:21,936 --> 01:17:24,372 HOW OUT OF CONTROL YOUR LYING HAD GOTTEN, 1558 01:17:24,404 --> 01:17:26,206 AND HOW YOU HAD TO BE STOPPED-- 1559 01:17:26,239 --> 01:17:29,043 FOR THE GOOD OF HUMANITY! 1560 01:17:29,077 --> 01:17:31,046 EVERYONE WAS GIVEN THEIR ASSIGNMENTS... 1561 01:17:31,078 --> 01:17:32,113 - OH, YEAH! - THERE YOU GO! 1562 01:17:32,146 --> 01:17:34,082 ...STARTED GETTING INTO CHARACTER... 1563 01:17:34,114 --> 01:17:37,818 DO YOU KNOW HOW TO USE THIS THING? 1564 01:17:39,854 --> 01:17:43,992 AND THEN, ONE BY ONE, I MADE YOUR LIES COME TRUE. 1565 01:17:44,024 --> 01:17:47,362 : PLACES, EVERYONE! WE GO LIVE IN FIVE MINUTES! 1566 01:17:47,395 --> 01:17:50,231 : I PLANTED A FEW CLUES ALONG THE WAY, 1567 01:17:50,264 --> 01:17:52,333 AND WHEN I THOUGHT YOU WERE GETTING STUCK, 1568 01:17:52,365 --> 01:17:54,034 I'D GIVE YOU A LITTLE PUSH. 1569 01:17:54,068 --> 01:17:57,405 LOOK. ALL I KNOW IS THAT HURLEY'S MAIN HABITAT 1570 01:17:57,438 --> 01:17:59,373 IS THE JUNGLE MINI-GOLF COURSE. 1571 01:18:00,507 --> 01:18:01,809 TO THE BUS STOP! 1572 01:18:01,842 --> 01:18:04,144 : WHEN MOM AND DAD WENT OUT FOR BOWLING NIGHT, 1573 01:18:04,177 --> 01:18:07,148 I ASKED MIN AND TAN COME OVER AND HELP DRIVE IT HOME. 1574 01:18:07,180 --> 01:18:10,384 MOM AND DAD NEVER EVEN KNEW. 1575 01:18:12,854 --> 01:18:14,856 WAIT. WHO ARE THEY? 1576 01:18:14,889 --> 01:18:15,989 THEY'RE MY MANDARIN TUTORS! 1577 01:18:16,023 --> 01:18:17,225 YOU SPEAK CHINESE? 1578 01:18:25,867 --> 01:18:27,836 OKAY, BUT WHAT ABOUT THE ALIENS? 1579 01:18:27,868 --> 01:18:29,403 OH, BRAD AND TODD ARE REAL STUNT GUYS, 1580 01:18:29,436 --> 01:18:32,806 SO THEY DID US A SOLID AND RIGGED IT ALL UP. 1581 01:18:32,840 --> 01:18:35,110 HURRY UP AND PUT THOSE IN! 1582 01:18:35,143 --> 01:18:36,911 IF I COULD SEE WHAT I WAS DOING, 1583 01:18:36,944 --> 01:18:40,282 I WOULDN'T NEED CONTACTS IN THE FIRST PLACE. 1584 01:18:42,884 --> 01:18:43,851 YOU HAD ME SCRAMBLING 1585 01:18:43,885 --> 01:18:45,052 WITH A COUPLE LAST-MINUTE LIES, 1586 01:18:45,086 --> 01:18:48,222 BUT, LUCKILY, TRISH IS MAJORING IN ROBOTICS. 1587 01:18:51,359 --> 01:18:55,063 OF COURSE, I HAD TO GET IN ON THAT ACTION MYSELF. 1588 01:18:55,095 --> 01:18:57,965 OKAY, BUT WHAT ABOUT ALL THE PICTURES OF ME AND MIKEY, 1589 01:18:57,998 --> 01:18:59,533 OR MY ADOPTED PARENTS? 1590 01:18:59,567 --> 01:19:00,801 PHOTOSHOP. 1591 01:19:00,835 --> 01:19:02,069 THAT IS-- 1592 01:19:03,136 --> 01:19:04,538 INGENIOUS? 1593 01:19:07,507 --> 01:19:09,510 UH, LYLE? 1594 01:19:09,543 --> 01:19:10,511 NOT RIGHT NOW. 1595 01:19:10,545 --> 01:19:12,913 SORRY. 1596 01:19:13,914 --> 01:19:15,216 I WAS GONNA SAY DIABOLICAL. 1597 01:19:15,248 --> 01:19:16,217 YEAH. 1598 01:19:17,518 --> 01:19:19,887 SOMEONE HAD TO STOP YOU, JACK. 1599 01:19:19,921 --> 01:19:21,155 I KNOW YOU'RE A GOOD KID, 1600 01:19:21,189 --> 01:19:23,992 BUT IF YOU KEEP LYING TO EVERYONE YOU MEET, 1601 01:19:24,024 --> 01:19:25,025 SOON, IT WON'T MATTER. 1602 01:19:25,060 --> 01:19:28,063 LIFE IS PRETTY LONELY WHEN NO ONE TRUSTS YOU. 1603 01:19:32,466 --> 01:19:33,902 YOU'RE RIGHT. 1604 01:19:33,935 --> 01:19:35,236 IT IS. 1605 01:19:35,269 --> 01:19:38,006 WAIT. YOU TRIED TO TEACH JACK 1606 01:19:38,038 --> 01:19:39,206 THAT LYING IS BAD 1607 01:19:39,239 --> 01:19:40,340 BY LYING TO HIM? 1608 01:19:41,175 --> 01:19:43,344 MAN, YOU TWO ARE DEFINITELY RELATED. 1609 01:19:45,412 --> 01:19:47,915 SO? HOW'D I DO? 1610 01:19:47,948 --> 01:19:50,918 A FLAWLESS PERFORMANCE, MIKEY. 1611 01:19:50,952 --> 01:19:53,121 MIKEY? YOUR NAME'S ACTUALLY MIKEY? 1612 01:19:53,154 --> 01:19:54,923 YEAH. WHAT ARE THE ODDS? 1613 01:19:56,023 --> 01:19:58,260 COME ON, GUYS. 1614 01:19:59,327 --> 01:20:00,161 READY TO GO? 1615 01:20:00,194 --> 01:20:03,163 YEAH. JUST... JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE. 1616 01:20:03,197 --> 01:20:04,231 ALRIGHT. 1617 01:20:19,881 --> 01:20:21,282 UGH! 1618 01:20:21,314 --> 01:20:23,884 OH, THIS THING SMELLS LIKE HANNAH BREATH. 1619 01:20:23,917 --> 01:20:25,420 AHEM! 1620 01:20:25,453 --> 01:20:27,389 YOU LIED ABOUT MIKEY? 1621 01:20:28,622 --> 01:20:30,924 MOM! DAD. WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING HERE? 1622 01:20:30,957 --> 01:20:32,460 PRINCIPAL KAR CALLED. 1623 01:20:32,493 --> 01:20:33,494 TOLD US TO GET DOWN HERE. 1624 01:20:33,527 --> 01:20:34,596 WE THOUGHT YOU WON! 1625 01:20:34,628 --> 01:20:36,029 YOU DIDN'T! 1626 01:20:36,063 --> 01:20:38,099 YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE, YOUNG MAN. 1627 01:20:38,131 --> 01:20:40,300 ME? IT WAS ALL HANNAH. SHE'S THE ONE-- 1628 01:20:40,333 --> 01:20:41,235 JACK. 1629 01:20:41,269 --> 01:20:43,271 YEAH, I'M GROUNDED. I KNOW. 1630 01:20:51,412 --> 01:20:53,314 UGH! 1631 01:20:53,346 --> 01:20:55,216 I THOUGHT THEY FOUND THE POSSUM. 1632 01:20:57,184 --> 01:20:58,987 HOW'S THE PUNISHMENT GOING? 1633 01:20:59,020 --> 01:21:00,955 IS IT BEDTIME YET? 1634 01:21:00,988 --> 01:21:02,257 IT'S NOT EVEN NOON. 1635 01:21:02,289 --> 01:21:04,024 MM. 1636 01:21:04,057 --> 01:21:05,525 WELL, I'M OFF TO THE WIENER PALACE. 1637 01:21:05,559 --> 01:21:06,561 OH, BY THE WAY-- 1638 01:21:06,594 --> 01:21:07,996 YOU MISSED A SPOT. 1639 01:21:08,029 --> 01:21:10,198 - OH, YEAH. - YEAH! 1640 01:21:14,668 --> 01:21:17,671 HEY, MAN. WHAT'S UP? 1641 01:21:17,704 --> 01:21:21,341 OH, YOU KNOW. JUST LIVING THE DREAM. 1642 01:21:21,375 --> 01:21:25,345 IF THE DREAM IS SUCKING GARAGE DUST. 1643 01:21:25,378 --> 01:21:27,314 : JACK, YOU'RE NOT SITTING DOWN, ARE YOU? 1644 01:21:27,347 --> 01:21:28,983 NO-- 1645 01:21:31,284 --> 01:21:32,452 YES. 1646 01:21:32,485 --> 01:21:35,189 RYAN JUST CAME TO VISIT. 1647 01:21:35,221 --> 01:21:37,557 THE TRUTH. NICELY DONE. 1648 01:21:37,591 --> 01:21:39,027 HOW LONG YOU GROUNDED? 1649 01:21:39,060 --> 01:21:41,162 WELL, I'M NOT ALLOWED OUT OF THE HOUSE 1650 01:21:41,194 --> 01:21:43,530 UNTIL THE GARAGE IS CLEAN. 1651 01:21:43,564 --> 01:21:46,334 WELL, IF WE WORK TOGETHER, 1652 01:21:46,367 --> 01:21:49,103 WE SHOULD HAVE YOU OUT OF HERE IN ABOUT A WEEK. 1653 01:21:58,712 --> 01:22:00,280 JACK? 1654 01:22:00,314 --> 01:22:02,182 WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO BREAK MY DOOR DOWN? 1655 01:22:02,216 --> 01:22:04,152 OH! SORRY, SORRY. 1656 01:22:04,185 --> 01:22:05,687 YEAH, FIRST TIME I'VE BEEN ALLOWED OUT OF THE HOUSE 1657 01:22:05,720 --> 01:22:06,721 IN OVER A WEEK. 1658 01:22:06,753 --> 01:22:08,488 GOT A LITTLE EXCITED. 1659 01:22:08,521 --> 01:22:10,057 WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? 1660 01:22:10,091 --> 01:22:11,726 LISTEN, JENNIFER, I KNOW I MESSED UP, 1661 01:22:11,759 --> 01:22:12,726 BUT FROM NOW ON, 1662 01:22:12,760 --> 01:22:14,494 I'M GOING TO BE COMPLETELY HONEST WITH YOU. 1663 01:22:14,528 --> 01:22:16,364 OKAY. 1664 01:22:16,396 --> 01:22:18,466 OKAY. UM... 1665 01:22:18,498 --> 01:22:20,568 I LIKE YOU. 1666 01:22:20,600 --> 01:22:22,202 A LOT. 1667 01:22:22,235 --> 01:22:24,305 LIKE, HEH... "A LOT" A LOT, AND, UH, 1668 01:22:24,337 --> 01:22:25,605 I WANT TO GET TO KNOW YOU, 1669 01:22:25,639 --> 01:22:28,076 AND I WANT YOU TO GET TO KNOW ME, THE REAL ME. 1670 01:22:28,109 --> 01:22:30,378 ALL THE GOOD AND THE BAD. 1671 01:22:30,411 --> 01:22:31,712 LIKE, UH... 1672 01:22:31,746 --> 01:22:33,347 I TALK IN MY SLEEP. 1673 01:22:33,381 --> 01:22:35,283 MY FAVORITE FLAVOR IS GRAVY. 1674 01:22:35,315 --> 01:22:36,550 I BITE MY TOENAILS. 1675 01:22:36,583 --> 01:22:38,152 OH, STOP. 1676 01:22:38,185 --> 01:22:39,754 TOO MUCH HONESTY. 1677 01:22:39,787 --> 01:22:40,755 RIGHT. SORRY. 1678 01:22:40,787 --> 01:22:43,090 STILL TRYING TO GET USED TO TELLING THE TRUTH. 1679 01:22:43,123 --> 01:22:45,225 WILL YOU AT LEAST 1680 01:22:45,259 --> 01:22:47,462 CONSIDER GIVING ME A SECOND CHANCE? 1681 01:22:50,131 --> 01:22:52,033 COME ON... 1682 01:22:52,065 --> 01:22:53,600 LET ME MAKE IT UP TO YOU. 1683 01:22:56,670 --> 01:22:58,105 FINE. 1684 01:22:58,139 --> 01:22:59,640 YOU CAN MAKE IT UP TO ME. 1685 01:22:59,672 --> 01:23:01,175 YES! OKAY. 1686 01:23:01,207 --> 01:23:03,110 WHAT ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW? 1687 01:23:03,144 --> 01:23:04,179 - RIGHT NOW? - RIGHT NOW! 1688 01:23:04,212 --> 01:23:08,383 DANNY KOSTAS OF THE RED SOX IS KIND OF MY BUDDY. 1689 01:23:08,416 --> 01:23:10,618 I GAVE HIM SOME HITTING ADVICE. YOU KNOW, NOTHING BIG. 1690 01:23:10,650 --> 01:23:12,720 BUT HE SENT HIS LIMO 1691 01:23:12,752 --> 01:23:14,421 TO TAKE ME AND ANYBODY I WANT 1692 01:23:14,454 --> 01:23:15,789 TO THE RED SOX GAME TODAY, 1693 01:23:15,823 --> 01:23:17,492 AND I WANT TO TAKE YOU. 1694 01:23:17,524 --> 01:23:19,426 YOU JUST SAID, 1695 01:23:19,460 --> 01:23:22,363 "FROM NOW ON, I'M GONNA BE COMPLETELY HONEST WITH YOU." 1696 01:23:22,395 --> 01:23:23,797 I AM. 1697 01:23:23,831 --> 01:23:26,434 SEE YOU AT SCHOOL, JACK. 1698 01:23:26,466 --> 01:23:27,402 BUT JENNIFER-- 1699 01:23:54,862 --> 01:23:57,131 SO? WHAT'D SHE SAY? 1700 01:23:57,163 --> 01:23:58,565 SHE DIDN'T BELIEVE ME. 1701 01:23:58,599 --> 01:23:59,833 OH. 1702 01:23:59,867 --> 01:24:01,369 WELL, TAKE ME TO FENWAY. 1703 01:24:02,735 --> 01:24:05,305 YOU HAVE A LIMO? 1704 01:24:09,510 --> 01:24:10,645 JENNIFER... 1705 01:24:10,677 --> 01:24:12,613 WOULD I LIE TO YOU? 1706 01:24:15,483 --> 01:24:18,219 ♪ WHY DON'T WE GO TO THE CITY NOW? ♪ 1707 01:24:18,252 --> 01:24:20,588 ♪ WE CAN SEE ALL THE NITTY GRITTY NOW ♪ 1708 01:24:20,621 --> 01:24:24,324 ♪ CATCH A FLY BALL AT THE STADIUM ♪ 1709 01:24:24,358 --> 01:24:27,261 ♪ MAYBE FREEFALL INTO OBLIVION ♪ 1710 01:24:27,293 --> 01:24:29,296 ♪ THESE DAYS, THESE DAYS ♪ 1711 01:24:29,329 --> 01:24:31,698 ♪ EVERY TIME THAT I GO DOWNTOWN ♪ 1712 01:24:31,731 --> 01:24:33,201 ♪ I CAN'T BELIEVE ♪ 1713 01:24:33,234 --> 01:24:34,469 ♪ THERE'S SO MUCH THERE'S SO MUCH ♪ 1714 01:24:34,502 --> 01:24:36,204 ♪ OF EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING ♪ 1715 01:24:36,237 --> 01:24:39,273 ♪ THERE'S SO MUCH OF EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING ♪ 1716 01:24:39,305 --> 01:24:41,475 ♪ MOVE WITH THE TIMES OR THEY'LL LEAVE YOU BEHIND ♪ 1717 01:24:41,509 --> 01:24:45,212 ♪ YOU ARE YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY ♪ 1718 01:24:45,246 --> 01:24:47,481 ♪ MOVE WITH THE TIMES OR GO OUT OF YOUR MIND ♪ 1719 01:24:47,515 --> 01:24:51,619 ♪ YOU ARE YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY ♪ 1720 01:25:09,270 --> 01:25:10,638 ♪ IF YOU CAN HEAR THIS ♪ 1721 01:25:10,671 --> 01:25:13,807 ♪ THEN IT MEANS THAT THERE'S NO APOCALYPSE ♪ 1722 01:25:13,841 --> 01:25:17,411 ♪ STILL, I DON'T KNOW WHY I EVEN GO DOWNTOWN ANYMORE ♪ 1723 01:25:17,444 --> 01:25:19,347 ♪ THERE'S TOO MUCH THERE'S TOO MUCH ♪ 1724 01:25:19,380 --> 01:25:21,315 ♪ OF EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING ♪ 1725 01:25:21,347 --> 01:25:24,252 ♪ OUT ON THE STREET SHOULDER TO SHOULDER ♪ 1726 01:25:24,284 --> 01:25:26,887 ♪ THE HUMAN HEAT IS BOILING OVER ♪ 108212

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