Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02:000 --> 00:00:03:360 Can't we just go home? 2 00:00:03:640 --> 00:00:06:280 If I gotta drag you to the doctor at 8 in the morning... 3 00:00:06:440 --> 00:00:08:520 ...you can cool your jets while I get coffee. 4 00:00:08:680 --> 00:00:10:120 I must look like an idiot. 5 00:00:10:360 --> 00:00:11:920 Wish I could tell you different. 6 00:00:12:160 --> 00:00:15:240 You're the reason we went to the eye doctor in the first place. 7 00:00:15:520 --> 00:00:17:400 You said, "Throw me a piece of toast." 8 00:00:19:480 --> 00:00:21:080 I threw you a piece of toast. 9 00:00:22:040 --> 00:00:23:760 Two cups of regular coffee, please. 10 00:00:24:440 --> 00:00:27:080 - My treat. - Oh, that makes up for everything. 11 00:00:27:280 --> 00:00:30:560 Pigeons can feed out of my eye socket, but I get a free cup of coffee. 12 00:00:32:400 --> 00:00:35:120 Just the coffee. Keep the change. 13 00:00:35:680 --> 00:00:38:200 I'm gonna need your help until I get this patch off. 14 00:00:38:440 --> 00:00:40:920 I am absolutely there for you. 15 00:00:43:000 --> 00:00:44:800 Great. 16 00:00:49:120 --> 00:00:50:360 Great. So... 17 00:00:50:560 --> 00:00:53:480 So you'll drive me to work, pick me up, get Jake at school... 18 00:00:53:720 --> 00:00:56:480 ...do the grocery shopping... - Okay, I may have misspoken. 19 00:00:56:680 --> 00:01:00:160 Charlie, you have to. You know I can't drive. 20 00:01:04:800 --> 00:01:07:040 I don't see why not. 21 00:01:09:280 --> 00:01:11:440 - Oh, look who's here. - Who? 22 00:01:11:880 --> 00:01:14:280 A girl I used to go out with. Over there. 23 00:01:15:320 --> 00:01:16:720 Hey, Sherri. 24 00:01:16:920 --> 00:01:20:000 - Hey, Charlie, long time. - Yeah. Good to see you. 25 00:01:20:160 --> 00:01:21:840 - This is my brother, Alan. - Hi. 26 00:01:22:040 --> 00:01:23:720 - Hi. - What happened to your eye? 27 00:01:24:240 --> 00:01:26:640 Well, I wanted a piece of toast, and... 28 00:01:26:840 --> 00:01:28:480 Bar fight. 29 00:01:29:800 --> 00:01:31:960 - Nice to meet you. - Well, nice meeting you too. 30 00:01:32:200 --> 00:01:34:920 - Good to see you, Charlie. - Good to see you too. 31 00:01:36:920 --> 00:01:39:200 - Wow, you went out with her? - Yep. 32 00:01:39:400 --> 00:01:41:480 Why would you stop? 33 00:01:41:840 --> 00:01:44:040 I don't remember. I probably got bored. 34 00:01:44:280 --> 00:01:46:040 Bored? How do you get bored with that? 35 00:01:46:280 --> 00:01:49:280 For every beautiful woman, there's at least one guy out there... 36 00:01:49:480 --> 00:01:53:200 ...who's tired of pretending to listen to her in exchange for sex. 37 00:01:53:560 --> 00:01:56:720 Well, let me go on record as saying, I am not that guy. 38 00:01:56:960 --> 00:01:59:880 If I ever had a woman like that, I would cherish her. 39 00:02:00:080 --> 00:02:01:520 I would worship her. I would... 40 00:02:01:720 --> 00:02:05:480 ...start a small country and put her face on a stamp so I could lick her head. 41 00:02:06:920 --> 00:02:08:960 - Why don't you go talk to her. - Yeah, right. 42 00:02:09:200 --> 00:02:12:360 Gorgeous women like that are not interested in pasty guys like me... 43 00:02:12:560 --> 00:02:14:720 ...unless we're in line for the British throne. 44 00:02:15:400 --> 00:02:18:840 - So you give up without even trying? - Yep. That's my motto. 45 00:02:19:040 --> 00:02:22:600 Why waste time on 10s when you're already getting rejected by sixes? 46 00:02:23:160 --> 00:02:27:280 Alan, listen to me. You are a smart, sensitive, good-Iooking man... 47 00:02:27:480 --> 00:02:29:920 ...with some milky discharge coming out of one eye... 48 00:02:30:120 --> 00:02:31:840 ...but who amongst us is perfect? 49 00:02:32:080 --> 00:02:34:280 That's the other thing. Look at me. I'm a mess. 50 00:02:34:520 --> 00:02:38:000 So? Women like Sherri have big, hunky guys hitting on them all day long. 51 00:02:38:200 --> 00:02:41:520 A guy like you walks up, makes a move, you know what that says to her? 52 00:02:42:160 --> 00:02:43:560 Trick or treat? 53 00:02:45:280 --> 00:02:48:480 It says, "I'm confident in who I am." 54 00:02:48:680 --> 00:02:50:760 - You think? - I know. 55 00:02:50:960 --> 00:02:54:240 So, what if she's not interested. What's the worst that could happen? 56 00:02:54:440 --> 00:02:57:840 Actually, the worst that could happen is she points at me... 57 00:02:58:040 --> 00:03:01:440 ...and laughs, causing every seventh grader in the cafeteria to turn... 58 00:03:01:640 --> 00:03:03:800 ...and watch me slink back to the geek table... 59 00:03:04:000 --> 00:03:06:440 ...with a growing wet spot on the front of my chinos. 60 00:03:07:000 --> 00:03:08:600 We ninth graders enjoyed it also. 61 00:03:10:200 --> 00:03:13:320 But you're not in junior high anymore, and you're not a... 62 00:03:14:120 --> 00:03:16:320 You're not in junior high anymore. 63 00:03:16:520 --> 00:03:18:960 - It's time to let go of those fears. - I don't know. 64 00:03:19:200 --> 00:03:20:440 Oh, come on, Alan. 65 00:03:20:680 --> 00:03:24:280 For once in your life, don't settle. Go for what you really want. 66 00:03:27:880 --> 00:03:30:960 You know what? You're right. I'm gonna go talk to her. 67 00:03:31:480 --> 00:03:32:920 Hold on. 68 00:03:33:120 --> 00:03:34:840 Let's clean some of that discharge. 69 00:03:35:720 --> 00:03:38:360 You wanna say "I'm confident," not "I'm infectious." 70 00:03:40:400 --> 00:03:41:720 There. Go get her. 71 00:03:46:320 --> 00:03:50:520 Hey, you see that guy over there? Twenty bucks says he wets himself. 72 00:04:10:680 --> 00:04:12:960 - Hello. - Hi. 73 00:04:13:160 --> 00:04:15:240 - Alan? - I remember. 74 00:04:16:000 --> 00:04:18:640 Look, I needed to come clean about something. 75 00:04:19:800 --> 00:04:22:960 I wasn't actually in a bar fight. 76 00:04:23:280 --> 00:04:26:200 I took a piece of whole-wheat toast to the eye. 77 00:04:26:840 --> 00:04:29:480 I mean, it was cut diagonally and toasted well... 78 00:04:29:640 --> 00:04:31:520 ...so it was essentially shrapnel. 79 00:04:34:200 --> 00:04:35:800 Did some real damage. 80 00:04:36:040 --> 00:04:39:680 I see. And why do you feel the need to tell me all this? 81 00:04:39:920 --> 00:04:43:200 Well, I guess I didn't want our relationship to start on a lie. 82 00:04:43:440 --> 00:04:45:120 Our relationship? 83 00:04:45:920 --> 00:04:47:800 - I'll go now. - No, no, wait. 84 00:04:48:040 --> 00:04:49:400 Sit down. Join me. 85 00:04:51:240 --> 00:04:52:520 Okay. 86 00:05:25:080 --> 00:05:27:560 - That's it. I'm out. - Oh, come on. 87 00:05:28:320 --> 00:05:29:600 No, no, no. No more. 88 00:05:29:840 --> 00:05:31:440 You got a date. Leave it alone. 89 00:05:31:640 --> 00:05:33:760 Not just a date. A date with... 90 00:05:38:440 --> 00:05:40:120 Enough. 91 00:05:40:320 --> 00:05:42:960 - I'd think you'd be happy for me. - I am happy for you. 92 00:05:43:120 --> 00:05:44:720 You had the courage to walk over... 93 00:05:44:960 --> 00:05:47:600 ...with your pus-filled eye and fall on your ass... 94 00:05:47:760 --> 00:05:52:040 ...and still got a date with one of the most beautiful women I've ever met. 95 00:05:52:240 --> 00:05:54:720 - I'm not only happy for you, I'm proud. - Thank you. 96 00:05:54:960 --> 00:05:57:600 Now, I have to re-evaluate everything I thought I knew... 97 00:05:57:800 --> 00:06:01:200 ...about men, women, relationships, God and the universe. 98 00:06:02:360 --> 00:06:04:360 But that's not your problem. 99 00:06:04:560 --> 00:06:07:640 Charlie, I am as surprised as you that she said yes. 100 00:06:08:400 --> 00:06:09:880 I don't think so. 101 00:06:10:560 --> 00:06:14:760 I was really intimidated, but as it turns out, she's just like a regular person... 102 00:06:14:960 --> 00:06:18:640 ...except for, you know, being from the planet: 103 00:06:20:480 --> 00:06:23:120 Alan, never do that around me again. 104 00:06:24:000 --> 00:06:27:360 You know, actually, we have a lot in common. 105 00:06:27:680 --> 00:06:29:560 Okay. I'll bite. 106 00:06:29:840 --> 00:06:31:840 Well, we both went through tough divorces. 107 00:06:32:080 --> 00:06:34:240 - Sherri was married? - You didn't know that? 108 00:06:34:440 --> 00:06:37:040 - It never came up. - What did come up? 109 00:06:37:240 --> 00:06:38:680 Never mind. Scratch that. 110 00:06:39:440 --> 00:06:40:960 Where should I take her to dinner? 111 00:06:41:200 --> 00:06:43:640 Where did you go so I can take her somewhere else? 112 00:06:43:880 --> 00:06:46:960 Last thing you want is for her to start comparing you to me. 113 00:06:47:200 --> 00:06:49:160 Exactly. 114 00:06:49:360 --> 00:06:51:360 Wait. 115 00:06:51:560 --> 00:06:52:840 What do you mean? 116 00:06:53:640 --> 00:06:55:760 You want your relationship to stand on its own. 117 00:06:56:040 --> 00:06:58:440 - Right. - Well, that's what I meant. 118 00:06:58:680 --> 00:07:03:040 Okay. I thought you were trying to rub my nose in the fact that you dated her. 119 00:07:03:680 --> 00:07:05:680 Alan, I would never do that. 120 00:07:05:920 --> 00:07:07:440 Well, thank you. 121 00:07:08:360 --> 00:07:10:440 I don't have to. 122 00:07:14:200 --> 00:07:16:640 You think you could kill a guy with a piece of toast? 123 00:07:16:840 --> 00:07:18:080 No. 124 00:07:18:320 --> 00:07:20:520 Because if you did, you could eat the toast. 125 00:07:20:720 --> 00:07:23:680 The police would never find the weapon. It's the perfect crime. 126 00:07:23:920 --> 00:07:26:920 And part of a nutritious breakfast. 127 00:07:27:160 --> 00:07:30:200 Okay, guys, I guess I'll see you later. 128 00:07:30:440 --> 00:07:31:960 Where you going? 129 00:07:32:160 --> 00:07:33:600 - Out for dinner. - With who? 130 00:07:36:520 --> 00:07:39:200 Jake, look, I think... 131 00:07:39:400 --> 00:07:42:480 I think you're old enough to know that your dad's not just a dad. 132 00:07:42:720 --> 00:07:45:200 He's also a man and that... 133 00:07:45:440 --> 00:07:47:560 ...even though I'm not married to your mom... 134 00:07:47:800 --> 00:07:50:680 ...I still enjoy the company of women... 135 00:07:50:880 --> 00:07:54:360 ...which means that I will occasionally go out with one. 136 00:07:54:600 --> 00:07:57:440 But the important thing for you to understand... 137 00:07:57:720 --> 00:08:00:520 ...is that I am not trying to replace your mother. 138 00:08:00:720 --> 00:08:03:360 In fact, no one can replace your mother. 139 00:08:05:040 --> 00:08:08:400 I bet you could kill a guy with a piece of bacon. 140 00:08:10:760 --> 00:08:12:960 All right, then. I'm glad we had this talk. 141 00:08:13:600 --> 00:08:16:640 I'm gonna go post my plan on the Internet. 142 00:08:18:720 --> 00:08:20:600 You know, there's moments around here... 143 00:08:20:800 --> 00:08:23:440 ...that make me wish I had a son of my own. 144 00:08:23:680 --> 00:08:25:160 That wasn't one of them. 145 00:08:26:320 --> 00:08:29:800 Yeah, well. Anyway, I really appreciate you watching him tonight. 146 00:08:30:000 --> 00:08:31:240 No problem. 147 00:08:33:560 --> 00:08:36:320 - How you getting to the restaurant? - Sherri's picking me up. 148 00:08:37:240 --> 00:08:38:920 - Very convenient. - Why? 149 00:08:39:160 --> 00:08:41:520 Because she's been here before? Been here with you? 150 00:08:41:720 --> 00:08:44:840 Because you've had sex with her in every room in the house? 151 00:08:45:080 --> 00:08:46:560 No, because you can't drive. 152 00:08:48:040 --> 00:08:50:360 But it's interesting to see how your mind works. 153 00:08:53:640 --> 00:08:56:840 Alan, let me give you some advice. 154 00:08:57:800 --> 00:09:02:080 Alcohol impairs your ability to make good decisions. 155 00:09:02:280 --> 00:09:05:400 We don't want you to lose that ability. We want her to. 156 00:09:07:120 --> 00:09:09:560 Of course. Very good. 157 00:09:09:760 --> 00:09:11:080 What else? 158 00:09:11:280 --> 00:09:14:680 Well, women like Sherri already know they're beautiful and desirable. 159 00:09:14:840 --> 00:09:17:720 - You won't score points by telling her. - Okay. 160 00:09:17:920 --> 00:09:19:720 Don't be in a hurry to spill your guts. 161 00:09:19:960 --> 00:09:21:560 She doesn't need your life story... 162 00:09:21:800 --> 00:09:23:600 ...before you get the salad. - Got it. 163 00:09:23:840 --> 00:09:27:120 As someone who knows your life story, I'd say she doesn't need to hear it at all. 164 00:09:28:240 --> 00:09:31:480 Right, right. I'll be cool, aloof, distant. 165 00:09:32:320 --> 00:09:34:960 She's here, she's here, she's here! 166 00:09:38:520 --> 00:09:40:720 What about the... What... What... 167 00:09:42:440 --> 00:09:43:840 What about the kiss goodnight? 168 00:09:44:040 --> 00:09:46:200 - Should I ask or just go for it? - Go for it. 169 00:09:46:400 --> 00:09:48:960 Don't wait until the last minute. It creates pressure. 170 00:09:49:160 --> 00:09:51:040 - Get it out of the way early. - How early? 171 00:09:51:320 --> 00:09:53:240 After dinner, when you walk to the car... 172 00:09:53:440 --> 00:09:55:880 ...open her door, wait for her to say thank you... 173 00:09:56:120 --> 00:09:58:400 ...smile, lean in, and kiss her. 174 00:09:58:760 --> 00:10:00:680 Oh, nice. 175 00:10:07:800 --> 00:10:09:600 Hi, Alan. You ready? 176 00:10:10:000 --> 00:10:13:640 You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and I don't deserve you. 177 00:10:16:160 --> 00:10:18:560 That's another way to go. 178 00:10:22:800 --> 00:10:25:000 - Madam. - Thank you. 179 00:10:27:840 --> 00:10:30:440 - Sir. - Oh, thank you. 180 00:10:34:680 --> 00:10:36:320 - Would you like the wine list? - No. 181 00:10:36:480 --> 00:10:39:440 I'll have the Woodbridge Pinot Noir. Or should we get a bottle? 182 00:10:40:160 --> 00:10:42:000 Oh, definitely get a bottle. 183 00:10:42:560 --> 00:10:44:480 Coffee for me. 184 00:10:48:160 --> 00:10:51:440 You know, Sherri, I'd really like to see more of you. 185 00:10:51:640 --> 00:10:53:920 Maybe we should wait and see how tonight goes. 186 00:10:54:200 --> 00:10:57:280 No, I mean, I've only got one good eye. Could we change places? 187 00:10:58:200 --> 00:10:59:920 Oh, sure. 188 00:11:11:120 --> 00:11:13:960 - Are you okay? - Oh, yes, yes. Fine. 189 00:11:14:240 --> 00:11:16:040 - This is a nice place. - Yeah. 190 00:11:16:280 --> 00:11:17:520 It's my favorite. 191 00:11:18:320 --> 00:11:20:040 You ever come here with Charlie? 192 00:11:21:000 --> 00:11:22:560 I don't know. Probably. 193 00:11:24:040 --> 00:11:25:560 He's a big steak-eater. 194 00:11:26:960 --> 00:11:31:360 I'm more of a fish guy. You know, I'm surf, he's turf. 195 00:11:33:120 --> 00:11:35:240 And we're cops. 196 00:11:37:040 --> 00:11:39:600 - You're very cute. - You too. 197 00:11:41:200 --> 00:11:43:440 All right. So tell me about yourself. 198 00:11:44:080 --> 00:11:46:880 Well, there's not a lot to tell. 199 00:11:47:080 --> 00:11:49:520 I was San Fernando Valley Chiropractor of the Year... 200 00:11:49:720 --> 00:11:51:400 ...if you follow that kind of thing. 201 00:11:51:640 --> 00:11:53:040 Recently divorced. 202 00:11:53:320 --> 00:11:57:440 But not too recently. I've already had my rebound, transitional relationships. 203 00:11:57:640 --> 00:11:59:680 - So no worries there. - Good to know. 204 00:11:59:920 --> 00:12:02:120 Actually, it wasn't so much a relationship... 205 00:12:02:320 --> 00:12:06:800 ...as a case of mistaken identity, but I think it still counts. 206 00:12:07:360 --> 00:12:09:160 - Okay. - And... 207 00:12:09:400 --> 00:12:12:560 ...as you know, I live with Charlie... 208 00:12:12:760 --> 00:12:14:560 ...whom you've already... 209 00:12:15:520 --> 00:12:17:640 - Met? - Yeah, let's go with met. 210 00:12:18:960 --> 00:12:21:800 Alan, is my having dated Charlie gonna be a problem for you? 211 00:12:22:040 --> 00:12:26:640 No, no, no. A little. 212 00:12:27:400 --> 00:12:30:080 Okay, look. Charlie and l... 213 00:12:30:280 --> 00:12:33:480 We had a very brief, superficial relationship. 214 00:12:33:720 --> 00:12:36:000 Okay? And to be honest, it was mostly about sex. 215 00:12:36:840 --> 00:12:38:200 Great. 216 00:12:39:160 --> 00:12:42:960 My point is, yeah, I'm tired of those, those shallow relationships... 217 00:12:43:200 --> 00:12:45:200 ...I was having with guys like Charlie. 218 00:12:45:400 --> 00:12:49:120 I wanna be with a man who can be sensitive and caring, nurturing. 219 00:12:49:320 --> 00:12:52:960 You know, somebody who can make me laugh, make me think. 220 00:12:54:760 --> 00:12:57:040 You do realize I'm straight, right? 221 00:12:58:640 --> 00:13:01:720 - See, you really are adorable. - Thank you. 222 00:13:01:920 --> 00:13:04:360 I tend to bring out the mothering instinct in women. 223 00:13:04:640 --> 00:13:07:280 - Oh, really? - Ironically, not my mother. 224 00:13:34:280 --> 00:13:35:560 What the hell are you doing? 225 00:13:35:800 --> 00:13:38:600 Check it out. Ninja death toast. 226 00:13:40:880 --> 00:13:42:560 Okay, stop it, stop it. 227 00:13:42:800 --> 00:13:45:080 You're in no position to give orders, Mr. Harper. 228 00:13:49:040 --> 00:13:51:520 - Morning. - Morning. 229 00:13:51:720 --> 00:13:55:600 - Death toast? - Oh, thank you. 230 00:13:57:240 --> 00:14:00:880 - So how did it go last night? - Fine. 231 00:14:01:120 --> 00:14:02:400 That's it? Fine? 232 00:14:02:680 --> 00:14:06:280 Charlie, we're not in high school anymore. I'm not gonna go into detail. 233 00:14:06:520 --> 00:14:09:920 - Okay, don't tell me. - Jake, go watch TV. 234 00:14:11:760 --> 00:14:14:560 - I'm still hungry. - There's bread all over the living room. 235 00:14:15:160 --> 00:14:16:440 All right. 236 00:14:17:640 --> 00:14:18:960 - Well? - It went great. 237 00:14:19:200 --> 00:14:22:440 She said I'm adorable. She thinks I'm nurturing, caring and sensitive. 238 00:14:22:680 --> 00:14:26:360 - I'm exactly what she's looking for. - She's looking for a half-blind sheepdog? 239 00:14:27:240 --> 00:14:29:800 She invited me to her house for dinner tonight. 240 00:14:30:000 --> 00:14:33:200 - I think she wants to have sex. - With who? 241 00:14:33:480 --> 00:14:36:000 - With me. - With you. 242 00:14:36:200 --> 00:14:37:320 Hang on a second. 243 00:14:41:480 --> 00:14:44:160 Nope. No snowballs reported in hell. 244 00:14:45:880 --> 00:14:48:120 No sightings of flying pigs. 245 00:14:48:640 --> 00:14:50:840 - What am I gonna do? - You don't know? 246 00:14:51:080 --> 00:14:53:120 Come on, Alan, you were married for 12 years. 247 00:14:53:360 --> 00:14:55:720 What does marriage have to do with sex? 248 00:14:55:960 --> 00:14:58:600 Point taken. Okay, you want some tips? 249 00:14:58:840 --> 00:15:01:400 No, no, nothing like that. 250 00:15:02:240 --> 00:15:04:400 I need step-by-step instructions. 251 00:15:04:920 --> 00:15:08:000 All right. Since this is your first bout in this weight class... 252 00:15:08:200 --> 00:15:09:920 ...I'd say stick with the basics. 253 00:15:10:200 --> 00:15:13:760 Better to do the simple stuff well than the fancy stuff badly. 254 00:15:13:960 --> 00:15:16:400 Got it. And the simple stuff would be... 255 00:15:17:240 --> 00:15:20:200 Well, you know how women like you to go slow? 256 00:15:20:440 --> 00:15:24:160 Really? My ex-wife put a premium on brevity. 257 00:15:24:560 --> 00:15:27:680 Her motto was, " Less is more, and none is perfect." 258 00:15:28:240 --> 00:15:31:240 Well, Sherri's not like that. You're gonna wanna take your time. 259 00:15:31:520 --> 00:15:34:280 - I can do that. - But don't loiter either. 260 00:15:34:520 --> 00:15:37:880 You don't want her to get bored and play solitaire on your head. 261 00:15:38:800 --> 00:15:40:840 No loitering. Got it. 262 00:15:43:880 --> 00:15:46:320 - Something else? - Okay. 263 00:15:46:520 --> 00:15:49:800 When you're with a woman like Sherri, who's so gosh-darn beautiful... 264 00:15:50:000 --> 00:15:52:520 ...that you get excited just thinking about her... 265 00:15:53:000 --> 00:15:57:720 ...how do you keep the sprinklers from going off while you're still mowing? 266 00:16:00:240 --> 00:16:02:640 Let me make sure I understand. 267 00:16:03:120 --> 00:16:07:840 You wanna keep your toothpaste in the tube until you're done brushing. 268 00:16:09:200 --> 00:16:10:880 What are you talking about? 269 00:16:11:480 --> 00:16:15:680 - What are you talking about? - Okay, okay. Let me try again. 270 00:16:16:200 --> 00:16:21:160 I don't wanna frost the cake while I'm still mixing the batter. 271 00:16:21:920 --> 00:16:24:280 I don't get it. She must have lost a bet. 272 00:16:24:520 --> 00:16:26:800 - Excuse me? - Nothing. 273 00:16:27:040 --> 00:16:30:320 All right. Here's what you do. 274 00:16:34:000 --> 00:16:37:600 When you feel like the train is leaving the station... 275 00:16:37:880 --> 00:16:40:000 You mean, going in the tunnel? 276 00:16:40:280 --> 00:16:42:360 No, no, I mean leaving the station. 277 00:16:42:640 --> 00:16:45:440 But you have to leave the station to get to the tunnel. 278 00:16:46:680 --> 00:16:48:800 Okay, okay. 279 00:16:49:000 --> 00:16:50:320 Let's start from the top. 280 00:16:50:520 --> 00:16:53:000 And work our way down, right? 281 00:16:56:400 --> 00:16:59:720 You know what? Just shut up and listen. 282 00:17:00:520 --> 00:17:03:840 When you're making love, the way to slow yourself down is... 283 00:17:04:040 --> 00:17:06:360 ...to think of something completely non-sexual. 284 00:17:06:600 --> 00:17:09:840 - Well, what do you think of? - You. 285 00:17:27:200 --> 00:17:29:880 That was a really great dinner. 286 00:17:30:880 --> 00:17:33:760 I'm glad you enjoyed it. You ready for dessert? 287 00:17:34:000 --> 00:17:35:960 I've been ready since I was 14. 288 00:17:38:720 --> 00:17:41:000 I'll be back. Why don't you put some music on. 289 00:17:41:200 --> 00:17:42:800 Okay. 290 00:18:03:720 --> 00:18:06:120 Hey, how about Diana Krall? 291 00:18:06:360 --> 00:18:10:200 Oh, actually, that's your brother's CD. Do you mind bringing it back to him? 292 00:18:10:600 --> 00:18:11:600 Not at all. 293 00:18:12:400 --> 00:18:15:760 I think I have one of his T-shirts. You might as well take that too. 294 00:18:15:960 --> 00:18:18:000 No problem. 295 00:18:18:200 --> 00:18:20:280 Hey, this is a cool, little CD player. 296 00:18:20:520 --> 00:18:23:800 Oh, thanks. It was a gift from your... It was a gift. 297 00:18:25:000 --> 00:18:26:280 Perfect. 298 00:18:26:480 --> 00:18:29:520 Is there anything else Charlie left behind? 299 00:18:31:920 --> 00:18:33:440 Just me. 300 00:18:38:000 --> 00:18:39:400 My brother's a fool. 301 00:18:39:640 --> 00:18:41:760 No argument here. 302 00:18:44:320 --> 00:18:48:680 - That is a very effective neglig�e. - Thank you. 303 00:18:48:880 --> 00:18:50:920 - Was it a gift? - No. 304 00:18:51:120 --> 00:18:54:320 - As a matter of fact, I bought it myself. - Oh, good. 305 00:18:56:400 --> 00:18:58:600 - How long ago? - What? 306 00:18:58:840 --> 00:19:01:120 Well, I was just wondering if Charlie saw it. 307 00:19:02:040 --> 00:19:03:800 Alan, don't go there. 308 00:19:04:440 --> 00:19:07:320 Oh, I wasn't going anywhere. It's just that... 309 00:19:08:560 --> 00:19:11:880 - Nothing. More kissing. - Okay, okay. 310 00:19:12:360 --> 00:19:15:440 What exactly is bothering you? 311 00:19:16:040 --> 00:19:19:000 Well, it's kind of hard to explain. 312 00:19:19:520 --> 00:19:23:080 For example, once, when Charlie and I were at camp... 313 00:19:23:280 --> 00:19:26:880 ...I lost my swim trunks, and I had to wear an old pair of Charlie's, and... 314 00:19:27:080 --> 00:19:29:600 ...I just couldn't enjoy the pool at all. 315 00:19:31:560 --> 00:19:34:680 So, what are you saying? I'm a pair of used swim trunks? 316 00:19:34:920 --> 00:19:38:800 No, no. In this case, I think you would be the pool. 317 00:19:40:240 --> 00:19:41:640 Maybe this was a bad idea. 318 00:19:41:840 --> 00:19:44:120 No, no, it's a great idea. It's right up there... 319 00:19:44:320 --> 00:19:47:760 ...with the wheel, fire and refrigerators that give ice through the door. 320 00:19:48:000 --> 00:19:50:520 - Sorry. I don't wanna do this anymore. - What? Why? 321 00:19:50:760 --> 00:19:54:720 You can't be with me without it being some competition with your brother. 322 00:19:54:960 --> 00:19:56:680 It's not a competition. 323 00:19:56:920 --> 00:20:00:600 And even it was, shouldn't we do it first before you decide who wins? 324 00:20:01:360 --> 00:20:02:640 You are unbelievable. 325 00:20:02:880 --> 00:20:06:040 - That could be taken a couple of ways. - Get out. 326 00:20:06:280 --> 00:20:09:080 Well, no ambiguity there. 327 00:20:10:000 --> 00:20:12:040 Don't forget your brother's CD. 328 00:20:12:560 --> 00:20:14:440 My eye! 329 00:20:20:960 --> 00:20:23:160 Man, I love sunsets. 330 00:20:23:320 --> 00:20:27:600 The way the sky is streaked with color. It's amazing. 331 00:20:32:760 --> 00:20:36:040 It's the pollution that makes those pretty colors, you know. 332 00:20:36:280 --> 00:20:41:480 What you're enjoying is the effect of light passing through airborne poison. 333 00:20:44:160 --> 00:20:48:400 No, that's not what I'm really enjoying. 334 00:20:52:560 --> 00:20:54:320 Boy, I hope that's guacamole. 335 00:21:17:880 --> 00:21:19:920 Subtitles by SDI Media Group 336 00:21:20:120 --> 00:21:22:160 [ENGLISH] 9999 00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00 www.tvsubtitles.net 27122