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1
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- Commander Alvin takes cover.
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00:00:07,459 --> 00:00:10,666
Stranded on the alien planet
with no hope of rescue,
3
00:00:10,667 --> 00:00:13,998
he clutches his handy
space blaster and prepares
4
00:00:13,999 --> 00:00:16,583
to fight this alien head on.
5
00:00:16,584 --> 00:00:18,291
Wah! Oh!
6
00:00:18,292 --> 00:00:22,124
You are so [unintelligible].
Kevin!
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- What?
- Oh, okay, okay.
8
00:00:23,999 --> 00:00:25,458
What is going on with you?
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00:00:25,459 --> 00:00:26,833
Oh, if I didn't know better, I'd
10
00:00:26,834 --> 00:00:28,333
say you had a crush on someone.
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- What? No, that's ridiculous.
You're crazy.
12
00:00:31,834 --> 00:00:33,998
- Ha! You denied it four times.
13
00:00:33,999 --> 00:00:35,666
That means you're lying.
14
00:00:35,667 --> 00:00:36,998
- All right, all right.
15
00:00:36,999 --> 00:00:37,918
Maybe I am.
16
00:00:37,919 --> 00:00:39,124
- Kevin, spit it out.
17
00:00:39,125 --> 00:00:39,918
Who is it?
18
00:00:39,919 --> 00:00:41,666
- Oh, I don't want to tell you.
19
00:00:41,667 --> 00:00:42,999
You'll, you'll make fun of me.
20
00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:44,998
- Oh, yeah, I probably will.
21
00:00:44,999 --> 00:00:45,876
So if you'd just give me
a hint...
22
00:00:45,877 --> 00:00:48,958
- [sighs] Where to begin?
She's more beautiful
23
00:00:48,959 --> 00:00:50,374
than a shooting star.
24
00:00:50,375 --> 00:00:52,541
She's got the biggest,
most gigantic heart
25
00:00:52,542 --> 00:00:53,625
in the whole world.
26
00:00:53,626 --> 00:00:55,999
And she's funnier
than my Uncle Bruce.
27
00:00:56,000 --> 00:00:58,082
I mean, she's the full package.
28
00:00:58,083 --> 00:01:00,333
Every time I try to talk to her,
29
00:01:00,334 --> 00:01:02,833
I get all, uh...
30
00:01:02,834 --> 00:01:04,998
- Stop doing that.
Now, now, look.
31
00:01:04,999 --> 00:01:05,959
This isn't difficult.
32
00:01:05,960 --> 00:01:08,625
You write her a note.
And, lucky for you,
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00:01:08,626 --> 00:01:10,998
I happen to be an expert
at love notes.
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00:01:10,999 --> 00:01:15,249
Here we go, a little smoochie
thing. Okay.
35
00:01:15,250 --> 00:01:17,750
Bam, cupid perfection. Ready?
36
00:01:17,751 --> 00:01:19,666
I wish that I could talk to you,
37
00:01:19,667 --> 00:01:21,166
'cause you're pretty as a pearl.
38
00:01:21,167 --> 00:01:22,625
But when I get around you,
39
00:01:22,626 --> 00:01:25,166
I think I'm gonna hurl.
How 'bout that?
40
00:01:25,167 --> 00:01:27,875
- Yeah, nothing more romantic
than throwing up.
41
00:01:27,876 --> 00:01:29,750
Um, here, Kevin, give her this.
42
00:01:29,751 --> 00:01:31,708
It's an equation that,
when solved,
43
00:01:31,709 --> 00:01:33,998
translates to
"You complete me."
44
00:01:33,999 --> 00:01:35,583
- Mm-hmm, yeah.
Yeah, that oughta...
45
00:01:35,584 --> 00:01:37,208
That oughta keep you single,
Kevin.
46
00:01:37,209 --> 00:01:38,291
- Uh, fine, Alvin.
47
00:01:38,292 --> 00:01:39,541
Try your puke poem.
48
00:01:39,542 --> 00:01:41,500
- Uh, just... just draw a heart
49
00:01:41,501 --> 00:01:43,082
on a piece of paper.
50
00:01:43,083 --> 00:01:46,041
That always works for me.
51
00:01:46,042 --> 00:01:47,998
Just saying.
52
00:01:47,999 --> 00:01:49,166
- Why can't you just
hand it to her?
53
00:01:49,167 --> 00:01:51,998
- Because I'd have to be next to
her. [hyperventilates]
54
00:01:51,999 --> 00:01:55,124
- Okay. Get it together, man!
55
00:01:55,125 --> 00:01:56,998
Come on, now. Deep breaths.
56
00:01:56,999 --> 00:01:58,166
Deep breaths, that's it.
57
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Okay, everything's
gonna be fine.
58
00:02:00,918 --> 00:02:01,998
- She's, she's coming.
59
00:02:01,999 --> 00:02:06,542
- Launch love note in three,
two, one.
60
00:02:07,167 --> 00:02:09,042
- Oh, I can't look.
61
00:02:12,417 --> 00:02:14,958
- You've got to be kidding me.
62
00:02:14,959 --> 00:02:16,917
- [gasps] What's this?
63
00:02:16,918 --> 00:02:18,998
- Aw, it's a love note.
64
00:02:18,999 --> 00:02:20,999
- Yeah, but for which one of us?
65
00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:22,917
- Hm, and who sent it?
66
00:02:22,918 --> 00:02:26,541
- Oh, ah, ah, right.
67
00:02:26,542 --> 00:02:29,459
- [chuckles] That answers
one question.
68
00:02:29,999 --> 00:02:32,625
I'm pretty sure this note was
for me.
69
00:02:32,626 --> 00:02:33,250
- Or me.
- Or me.
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00:02:33,251 --> 00:02:36,958
- Whatever. Look, no matter who
it was for,
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00:02:36,959 --> 00:02:38,416
none of us is ready for a
boyfriend.
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00:02:38,417 --> 00:02:42,583
- But we, we have to let him
down gently.
73
00:02:42,584 --> 00:02:44,625
It's just that I, I think of you
74
00:02:44,626 --> 00:02:45,998
as a... as a friend.
75
00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,583
- Oh, yeah, I get it.
76
00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:51,124
You think I'm a weirdo.
77
00:02:51,125 --> 00:02:52,833
[sobs] - No, not at all.
78
00:02:52,834 --> 00:02:55,583
I'm a weirdo too!
79
00:02:55,584 --> 00:02:56,375
- Kevin, please.
80
00:02:56,376 --> 00:02:57,958
I know what you think of me.
81
00:02:57,959 --> 00:02:59,374
I'm beautiful. I'm funny.
82
00:02:59,375 --> 00:03:01,998
[laughs] I'm incredibly
brilliant.
83
00:03:01,999 --> 00:03:04,333
But I, I just can't be your...
84
00:03:04,334 --> 00:03:05,334
- No!
85
00:03:05,334 --> 00:03:05,999
- No, Kevin. Stop.
86
00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:07,998
Don't do this to yourself.
It's humiliating.
87
00:03:07,999 --> 00:03:10,750
- [sobs] I can't live
without you.
88
00:03:10,751 --> 00:03:13,999
No, no, no!
89
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,208
- Get, get off me, Kevin.
90
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Get, get off.
91
00:03:17,792 --> 00:03:18,375
- So, listen, Kev.
92
00:03:18,376 --> 00:03:21,458
I mean, between saving the
elephants and soccer practice,
93
00:03:21,459 --> 00:03:25,458
I'd only get to see you, like,
three, maybe four minutes a day,
94
00:03:25,459 --> 00:03:26,417
and you deserve better.
95
00:03:26,418 --> 00:03:30,416
- KEVIN: I can't take this!
I can't take it.
96
00:03:30,417 --> 00:03:33,374
You're everything to me.
97
00:03:33,375 --> 00:03:33,999
- Poor Kevin.
98
00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:38,998
- Oh, breaking hearts is so
heartbreaking [sniffles]
99
00:03:38,999 --> 00:03:43,583
If only Kevin didn't find me
so... I mean, us... so fabulous.
100
00:03:43,584 --> 00:03:44,998
- [gasps] You guys, that's it.
101
00:03:44,999 --> 00:03:48,666
What if we made sure he didn't
find any of us appealing?
102
00:03:48,667 --> 00:03:51,082
- [gasps] Oh, Ellie, that,
that could work.
103
00:03:51,083 --> 00:03:53,124
And, and nobody gets hurt.
104
00:03:53,125 --> 00:03:54,959
- [bell rings]
105
00:03:55,542 --> 00:03:56,998
- Well, congratulations, Alvin.
106
00:03:56,999 --> 00:03:58,875
You almost look like you're
thinking.
107
00:03:58,876 --> 00:04:00,625
- Well, I am, and it's serious.
108
00:04:00,626 --> 00:04:03,333
- Kevin's crush is one of the
Chipettes.
109
00:04:03,334 --> 00:04:05,998
- What? Which one?
- He won't say.
110
00:04:05,999 --> 00:04:08,998
But I've narrowed it down to
three possibilities.
111
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:11,166
- All right, so you haven't been
thinking long.
112
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But what do you know?
113
00:04:12,126 --> 00:04:14,124
- Well, he said something about
her being as pretty
114
00:04:14,125 --> 00:04:17,374
as his Uncle Bruce, having the
heart of a shooting star,
115
00:04:17,375 --> 00:04:19,791
and as funny as a bunch
of wrenches.
116
00:04:19,792 --> 00:04:21,998
That's not much to go on,
I realize.
117
00:04:21,999 --> 00:04:22,999
It could be any one of them.
- Ooh, well, I,
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00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:25,208
I don't know what his Uncle
Bruce looks like.
119
00:04:25,209 --> 00:04:28,291
But they're all pretty,
especially Jeanette.
120
00:04:28,292 --> 00:04:31,625
- Well, pretty probably falls
under Brittany.
121
00:04:31,626 --> 00:04:34,124
- Ooh, sounds like someone
cares.
122
00:04:34,125 --> 00:04:35,958
- Ah, please!
Don't make me laugh.
123
00:04:35,959 --> 00:04:38,249
I couldn't care less.
But I mean, come on.
124
00:04:38,250 --> 00:04:40,416
Kevin doesn't have a chance
with Brittany.
125
00:04:40,417 --> 00:04:41,125
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
126
00:04:41,126 --> 00:04:43,998
Are you implying he has a chance
with Jeanette?
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- Sounds like someone cares.
128
00:04:45,709 --> 00:04:47,249
- Come on, I couldn't care less.
129
00:04:47,250 --> 00:04:49,374
- Uh oh. What are you guys
fighting about?
130
00:04:49,375 --> 00:04:51,791
- Kevin has a crush on one of
the Chipettes.
131
00:04:51,792 --> 00:04:54,833
- Oh, I, I hope he doesn't like
Eleanor.
132
00:04:54,834 --> 00:04:59,249
I mean... I mean, not, not like I
care, 'cause I don't.
133
00:04:59,250 --> 00:05:01,583
- I know. None of us cares.
134
00:05:01,584 --> 00:05:04,541
- But let's just follow him
tomorrow anyway.
135
00:05:04,542 --> 00:05:07,208
You know, for, uh, for fun.
136
00:05:07,209 --> 00:05:09,667
- [in unison] Yeah, for fun.
137
00:05:10,792 --> 00:05:12,208
- BRITTANY: Kevin? Kevin?
138
00:05:12,209 --> 00:05:14,249
Come here.
Come here and sit down.
139
00:05:14,250 --> 00:05:16,374
- Oh, hey Brittany. Whazzup?
140
00:05:16,375 --> 00:05:19,875
- I just thought if you're going
to be my boyfriend,
141
00:05:19,876 --> 00:05:21,249
we should work on your look.
142
00:05:21,250 --> 00:05:21,999
- Wha... What?
143
00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:23,998
- I've always wanted to cut
your hair.
144
00:05:23,999 --> 00:05:25,998
- No, no! My mom cuts my hair.
145
00:05:25,999 --> 00:05:27,374
- Yeah, not anymore.
146
00:05:27,375 --> 00:05:29,998
- Looks like Brittany likes
Kevin.
147
00:05:29,999 --> 00:05:31,082
- Why would you say that?
148
00:05:31,083 --> 00:05:32,625
- Because she's grooming him.
149
00:05:32,626 --> 00:05:33,292
- JEANETTE: Hi, Kevin!
150
00:05:33,293 --> 00:05:35,666
- Wait. Wha... what's
Jeanette doing?
151
00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:38,250
- Let's go. Come with me.
152
00:05:40,125 --> 00:05:42,833
Drink this juice and count
to three.
153
00:05:42,834 --> 00:05:47,750
Then I'll throw sparkles out
to thee. [chants]
154
00:05:47,751 --> 00:05:49,958
- Um, wait. Stop.
155
00:05:49,959 --> 00:05:52,998
- Wha... wha... what?
Is she out of her mind?
156
00:05:52,999 --> 00:05:55,998
- Oh, it's a love chant.
Is it working?
157
00:05:55,999 --> 00:06:00,208
- [chants] [giggles]
Are you in love with me yet?
158
00:06:00,209 --> 00:06:03,959
- No!
- Kevin! Wait!
159
00:06:07,083 --> 00:06:07,876
- Hello!
- Aah!
160
00:06:07,877 --> 00:06:09,998
- Do you want to go to the dance
with me? Huh?
161
00:06:09,999 --> 00:06:11,917
- No.
- Come over after school.
162
00:06:11,918 --> 00:06:15,666
We'll practice our moves.
Yeah, what's up?
163
00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:17,291
- I, I really should be going.
164
00:06:17,292 --> 00:06:20,166
- I'll come with you. See? See?
165
00:06:20,167 --> 00:06:22,416
It's, it's fun to do things
together.
166
00:06:22,417 --> 00:06:25,666
- Uh, get off!
167
00:06:25,667 --> 00:06:27,959
- Did you miss me?
- No!
168
00:06:28,792 --> 00:06:30,208
- Uh!
- Hi.
169
00:06:30,209 --> 00:06:32,998
- THE CHIPETTES [singing]
♪ Hey, would you notice ♪
170
00:06:32,999 --> 00:06:34,958
♪ If I called your name ♪
171
00:06:34,959 --> 00:06:36,291
♪ Or every day would you ♪
172
00:06:36,292 --> 00:06:38,166
♪ Know me just the same ♪
173
00:06:38,167 --> 00:06:39,666
♪ You never notice how ♪
174
00:06:39,667 --> 00:06:41,541
♪ I look at you ♪
175
00:06:41,542 --> 00:06:42,459
♪ So going crazy ♪
176
00:06:42,460 --> 00:06:44,833
♪ Is the only thing to do ♪
177
00:06:44,834 --> 00:06:45,998
♪ But things are going so well ♪
178
00:06:45,999 --> 00:06:50,583
♪ So I can't tell you
how I feel ♪
179
00:06:50,584 --> 00:06:52,458
♪ Hey ♪
♪ I got a crush ♪
180
00:06:52,459 --> 00:06:54,374
♪ That's what it's gotta be ♪
181
00:06:54,375 --> 00:06:55,416
♪ I've had enough ♪
182
00:06:55,417 --> 00:06:57,166
♪ When will you notice me ♪
183
00:06:57,167 --> 00:07:00,708
♪ [unintelligible] it's what I
want you to see ♪
184
00:07:00,709 --> 00:07:03,124
♪ Don't know what to say ♪
♪ So I'll walk away ♪
185
00:07:03,125 --> 00:07:04,625
♪ But I got a crush ♪
186
00:07:04,626 --> 00:07:05,417
♪ I got a crush ♪
187
00:07:05,418 --> 00:07:07,416
♪ That's what it's gotta be ♪
188
00:07:07,417 --> 00:07:08,209
♪ I've had enough ♪
189
00:07:08,210 --> 00:07:13,042
♪ When will you notice me ♪
- [screams]
190
00:07:13,834 --> 00:07:15,999
- Uh, nothing makes sense
anymore.
191
00:07:16,000 --> 00:07:18,998
- I can't figure out what they
see in him.
192
00:07:18,999 --> 00:07:20,998
- Oh, my stomach hurts.
193
00:07:20,999 --> 00:07:22,374
- What's he got that we don't?
194
00:07:22,375 --> 00:07:26,124
- Guys, I gotta hide!
They're after me.
195
00:07:26,125 --> 00:07:29,458
- Kevin, did you really think
you could hide from me?
196
00:07:29,459 --> 00:07:31,708
You silly goose.
- He's mine.
197
00:07:31,709 --> 00:07:33,166
- No, he's mine!
198
00:07:33,167 --> 00:07:34,083
- Stop it!
199
00:07:34,084 --> 00:07:35,291
- Kevin? Kevin? You know what?
200
00:07:35,292 --> 00:07:38,208
No more beating around the bush.
Which one is it?
201
00:07:38,209 --> 00:07:41,998
- Well, it, uh... It, it wasn't
for any of you.
202
00:07:41,999 --> 00:07:45,416
- See? I told you it was me.
Wait, what?
203
00:07:45,417 --> 00:07:47,500
- Oh. Okay, okay.
Uh, back up, buddy.
204
00:07:47,501 --> 00:07:50,208
I was there, remember?
You threw the paper plane.
205
00:07:50,209 --> 00:07:53,958
It landed at their feet.
These eyes don't lie.
206
00:07:53,959 --> 00:07:56,083
- No, no. If you remember...
207
00:07:57,501 --> 00:07:59,998
it was supposed to be for
Pamela.
208
00:07:59,999 --> 00:08:01,082
- ALVIN: Pamela G?
209
00:08:01,083 --> 00:08:02,917
- KEVIN: No, Pamela D.
210
00:08:02,918 --> 00:08:04,958
She was... she was right behind
the girls.
211
00:08:04,959 --> 00:08:08,500
I, I tried to tell you all, but,
but when I saw Pamela, I,
212
00:08:08,501 --> 00:08:10,166
I panicked and I ran.
213
00:08:10,167 --> 00:08:11,625
- [in unison] Oh.
214
00:08:11,626 --> 00:08:13,958
- [giggles] Oh, that's such
a relief.
215
00:08:13,959 --> 00:08:15,500
I, I mean, no offense.
216
00:08:15,501 --> 00:08:17,625
It's just, you're not our type.
217
00:08:17,626 --> 00:08:19,998
- But I bet you're Pamela's.
218
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:22,125
- Yeah, doubt it.
219
00:08:22,792 --> 00:08:25,082
- So, you guys don't like Kevin?
220
00:08:25,083 --> 00:08:26,042
- Uh, no.
221
00:08:26,043 --> 00:08:29,500
We were just acting crazy so he
would stop liking us.
222
00:08:29,501 --> 00:08:33,291
- Yeah, which apparently he
didn't. So awkward.
223
00:08:33,292 --> 00:08:35,583
- Why? Do you guys care?
- No.
224
00:08:35,584 --> 00:08:37,208
- No.
- Not me.
225
00:08:37,209 --> 00:08:37,999
- Not me. Not at all.
226
00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,958
- [laughs] We just wanted to
help our friend.
227
00:08:40,959 --> 00:08:43,082
- [gasps] Maybe we still can.
228
00:08:43,083 --> 00:08:46,458
- I, I, I hope you don't mind
229
00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:47,998
my asking, but, um, wh... wh...
Where exactly are we going?
230
00:08:47,999 --> 00:08:51,082
- Oh, you know, just for a nice
little stroll.
231
00:08:51,083 --> 00:08:52,042
- Exactly. Just, you know,
232
00:08:52,043 --> 00:08:55,416
four girlfriends hanging out.
Nothing else planned.
233
00:08:55,417 --> 00:08:59,501
- A walk in the park will cheer
you up.
234
00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:03,208
- Meow.
235
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:04,998
- Yeah, not really helping.
236
00:09:04,999 --> 00:09:07,500
- [laughs] What a, a
coincidence.
237
00:09:07,501 --> 00:09:10,124
I think that's Pamela over
there.
238
00:09:10,125 --> 00:09:13,998
- [gasps] What?!
239
00:09:13,999 --> 00:09:16,998
[hyperventilates]
240
00:09:16,999 --> 00:09:19,998
- Why, look. Isn't that Kevin
over there?
241
00:09:19,999 --> 00:09:21,999
- Yeah, the guy with his head in
the bag?
242
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:23,333
- Oh, let's say hi.
243
00:09:23,334 --> 00:09:24,750
- No. No, I, I can't.
244
00:09:24,751 --> 00:09:26,082
Really, guys, I get really
nervous.
245
00:09:26,083 --> 00:09:27,998
And, and then I end up talking
gibberish.
246
00:09:27,999 --> 00:09:30,998
I'm, I'm really awkward. I,
I can't even say hi.
247
00:09:30,999 --> 00:09:32,876
- Don't worry. We'll help you.
248
00:09:35,167 --> 00:09:36,834
- Table for two?
249
00:09:38,417 --> 00:09:41,750
- Oh.
- Uh. Uh.
250
00:09:41,751 --> 00:09:43,875
- Uh.
251
00:09:43,876 --> 00:09:44,626
- [speaks gibberish]
252
00:09:44,627 --> 00:09:48,708
- Kevin, Pamela says hi.
So good to see you.
253
00:09:48,709 --> 00:09:51,416
- [speaks gibberish]
254
00:09:51,417 --> 00:09:54,541
- Kevin says thank you and hopes
you enjoy the meal.
255
00:09:54,542 --> 00:09:56,626
- Dinner is served.
256
00:09:57,999 --> 00:10:00,791
- [speaks gibberish]
257
00:10:00,792 --> 00:10:04,666
- [laughs] He, he's saying help
yourself, Pamela.
258
00:10:04,667 --> 00:10:07,708
- Oh, whoops. I'm sorry.
259
00:10:07,709 --> 00:10:09,416
- Pamela says thank you.
260
00:10:09,417 --> 00:10:12,291
- KEVIN: Oh, my mom makes a
really good pasta.
261
00:10:12,292 --> 00:10:12,876
- Oh.
262
00:10:12,877 --> 00:10:15,708
- And, and a pretty good
sandwich, too.
263
00:10:15,709 --> 00:10:18,998
- You know, I really thought he
liked one of us.
264
00:10:18,999 --> 00:10:20,082
- Yeah, we did too.
265
00:10:20,083 --> 00:10:22,625
- [stutters] You know, not like
we cares.
266
00:10:22,626 --> 00:10:24,875
Right, Simon?
- [laughs] No, no, no.
267
00:10:24,876 --> 00:10:26,998
We didn't care. Right, Theodore?
268
00:10:26,999 --> 00:10:28,082
- Oh, right, right.
269
00:10:28,083 --> 00:10:29,208
No, we didn't care.
270
00:10:29,209 --> 00:10:31,082
Well, I mean, why,
why should we?
271
00:10:31,083 --> 00:10:32,708
- Yeah, why would we?
272
00:10:32,709 --> 00:10:35,125
- Yeah, I mean, we wouldn't.
19496
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