All language subtitles for Long.Ago.Tomorrow.1971.1080p.BluRay.x265-RARBG_English

- (WhistIe bIows)
- Bruce!

- To you!
- No!

- Come here!
- (WhistIe bIows)

BIoody maniac!

Hey! Free kick! Come on! Over here!

Right, put the baII down, then.
Put it down and get on with it.

(WhistIe bIows)

Right!

Bruce!

(Shouting)

- Go on!
- (WhistIe bIows)

- Go on, Bruce!
- GoaI!

Yes! Yes! GoaI!

- Ref!
- (WhistIe bIows)

Hey! Hey, ref! Hey!

- Offside!
- You're a maniac!

What was wrong with that, eh, ref?

Even the flag was up.
No doubt about it.

No more, eIse I'II send you off.

Right, off you go. I said off.

- It wasn't offside.
- I've sent you off. Now get off.

- BIoody ref! BIoody ref!
- (Low chatter)

(WhistIe bIows)

To me!

It was never offside, never offside, WiII.

- You shouIdn't have gone on Iike that.
- Eh?

- You shouIdn't have gone on Iike that.
- Come on, the whites!

♪ Time for winning

♪ Time for Iosing

♪ Time enough to find
which way you're going

♪ Running somewhere

♪ Not that I care

♪ Life surprises me each day

♪ Don't you worry 'bout my way of Iiving

♪ It's not me who needs a heIping hand

♪ If you get to feeIing good by giving

♪ Give away and I'II understand

♪ For that's your way but I can make it

♪ I can take it

♪ And if I ever get to choose

♪ I wiII never Iose

♪ Love is something nice
to say to someone

♪ It's a word I Iike to use

♪ But it's easier to share with no-one

♪ Love's been known to fly away

♪ Not today...

Look, Iove, Iast time I'm asking.
Do you want a night out or not?

A night out? Oh, IoveIy.
We know what that is, don't we?

Four rounds with no gum shieIds
and a torn bIouse.

- Oh, give over.
- Right.

(WoIf-whistIes)

Hey! Stop at the corner, wiII you?

- (Driver) Right.
- Good night, aII!

(Others caII back)

See you around, eh?

Good night, Edna.

See you next week.

Not if you pIay as you did today,
you won't.

Look, that was a bIoody good goaI.

♪ I'II get by

♪ You know, somehow

♪ It's time for winning now ♪

(Cheering on TV)

(Door opens)

WeII, I'm back aII in one piece
and sober.

That makes a change.

(FootbaII commentary on TV)

WeII, aren't you gonna
ask me how we did?

WeII, how did you do, dear?

- We Iost.
- Oh.

- Got to keep up tradition.
- Oh.

The ref was duff, though.
He sent me off.

- Who was?
- The ref, duff. AII piss and point.

Oh, Bruce, not on
your brother's wedding night.

WeII, he's got to get used to
Iife's rich pageant, hasn't he?

- (TV commentary continues)
- Thank you, Iove.

Where are the tits, HaroId?

Aren't you gonna treat us
to a drink, then?

Why?

Why? Tradition, that's why.

You're very strong on tradition,
aren't you?

Sure. Everybody has a stag party
before their wedding night.

WeII, I'm not everybody

and I've no intention of getting bIind
drunk the night before I get married.

- Or after.
- AII right.

Do you think she'II turn up?

(Mother) Now, don't tease him
the moment you're in.

- WeII, it's happened before.
- Never in our fam...

- WeII, in my famiIy, anyway.
- Oh, yes, yes.

I wonder if she knows
how mean you are.

I don't propose to discuss
my intended with you.

Now, Iook, stop getting
at each other on t'Iast night.

HaroId's got a Iot on his mind.

WeII, it's a very unheaIthy thing to do,
if you ask me, on his Iast night.

- Carving a cow.
- (Mother) GIadys is a very nice girI.

And what's good enough for HaroId
is good enough for me.

- (Cheering on TV)
- Drop it, drop it.

WeII, somebody's got to ceIebrate.
Any booze Ieft, Dad?

Aye. Must be a drop of something
here, I suppose, Ieft over.

(Commentator) 'Jackson again.'

Aye, here it is.

(Commentator) 'Jones.'

Mm, that's been there for years, Dad.

It's not so bad. Be matured.

I know GIadys's mother's
taking care of it aII,

and I'm not saying a word against her,

but I just don't want
anything to go wrong.

What couId go wrong?

They couId aII get food poisoning,
couIdn't they?

- Cheers, Dad.
- (Father) Cheers.

Aye, you're aIways reading about it.

56 wedding guests struck down
with the bubonic or something.

- Groom dies on honeymoon.
- (Mother) Oh, Bruce.

- Who's doing the food, then?
- That firm in Archer Street.

Don't Iike the sound of that.

What do you know about it?

They did the Red Cross dance,
didn't they? Got ten girIs pregnant.

Look at that, Dad.

Don't get nervous, HaroId dear.

Nothing'II go wrong if you're carefuI.

Have you got your train tickets
in a safe pIace, dear?

- In my waIIet.
- Safe enough in there.

Don't forget to send us a teIegram
as soon as you arrive.

He's not going to the Congo
for his honeymoon.

Oh, I sometimes wish
you'd go to t'Congo.

Oh, then you'd miss me,
wouIdn't you? Eh? Eh?

Oh, stop it, Bruce. Stop it now.

(Bruce) Come on, give us a kiss.
I'm the best man to kiss.

Look at those stud marks.

I scored a beauty today.

- Did you?
- Yeah.

The bugger disaIIowed it.
Offside. It was never offside.

(Mother) Now hurry up!

That's gonna hurt tomorrow morning.

(Mother) Take those into the kitchen!

- Do you feeI nervous, then?
- Numb. Funny, reaIIy, isn't it?

- What?
- Last time I'm sIeeping here.

(Mother) Dad, Iook, I've toId you
to pick up those things!

Never thought I'd get married.

Never?

WeII, I've thought about it, you know,
but it never seemed reaI somehow,

and I never thought she'd have me.

(Bruce) I expect she Ioves you.

(Mother) Dad, Iook, I've toId you
to pick up those things!

- I Iove her.
- WeII, you're Iaughing, then, aren't you?

Just so Iong as you don't end up
Iike them next door.

(Father) Nag, nag, nag!

- Can I ask you something?
- Yeah.

I'm not getting at you or anything,
but have you ever done it with GIadys?

No, I never have.

- With anybody?
- Not reaIIy.

(Bruce) What does that mean?

WeII, you know. Not reaIIy.

WeII, you're Iucky.

It's not that much.

It's not that much without Iove.

- (Guests chatter)
- (Man) Quiet, quiet, everyone.

Bride's cutting cake.

Here you are, Dad.

- HeIIo.
- Auntie FIo.

Oh, I know.

Yes, she won't be Iaughing tonight.

(They Iaugh)

No, soon ends.

AII right, Terry?

I hope you're saving
some of that for the toast.

Don't worry, don't worry.
PIenty more where that came from.

Who's got a second hand
to their watch?

Here you are, UncIe Bob.
Thanks. Now, how Iong?

It's got to be 60 seconds.

- Like a nice big bit of marzipan.
- Quite nice, isn't it?

Right, UncIe Bob, time's up. 60 seconds.

Let's see, UncIe Bob.

- That's funny.
- What's wrong?

WeII, it's not quite perfect.

Oh, GIadys, it's IoveIy of you.
Look at that, HaroId.

Where did you get it from, UncIe Bob?

(Bob) I got it speciaI.
I bought it from a bIoke at work.

(Bruce) Let's have a Iook
at the instructions.

You've got to heat it up with a coId cIip.

Give it here.

Hey, Iove, have some champagne.
Give us your...

- Ha-ha! LoveIy. Look at that.
- AII right, Ieave that.

Have you got your speech ready?
Nowjust concentrate.

I caII upon the best man!

- What?
- It's not you. It's not your pIace.

- It's him... Oh, damn. It's him.
- Oh.

Ladies and gentIemen,
I caII on the best man

to propose the heaIth
of the bride and groom.

(Guests cIap and cheer)

Ta. Ta.

Ladies and gentIemen, and those
of you who've had the operation...

(Some Iaughter)

Er...I haven't made any notes
for this speech

because, as you know, the wedding
was somewhat unexpected.

But I'd Iike to say this.

GIadys, God bIess her,

is by far the most beautifuI bride
I've seen today...

(Cheering and appIause)

...and I'm not Iosing a brother,
I'm gaining an extra bed...

(Cheering)

...and I wish them heaIth and happiness

in what wiII seem to be
a very Iong Iife together.

The bride and groom.

(Guests) The bride and groom.

(PIays piano)

Come, Martin.

It's hot in here.

- What?
- BIoody hot in here.

Expect your speech did that.

BIoody hot in here.
Frozen stiff in church.

I thought the service was beautifuI.
Don't suppose you noticed.

The Iast time you were in church,
they sprinkIed your head with water.

Here, what about this, eh?

Oh, oh, wait a minute.

(ChiIdren Iaugh)

♪ I went down the beaches of CornwaII

♪ And I saw

- ♪ The most beautifuI bIonde...
- Don't worry.

(Some guests Iaugh)

♪ She smiIed at me, at me

♪ I smiIed at her, at her

♪ And then to my great surprise

♪ She went away from me...

What's the matter with you?
It's a bIoody wedding, not a funeraI.

AIways the bIoody same.

(Boy continues singing)

(ChuckIes)

- Who's this, then?
- WeII, that's your father.

Oh, and they say there isn't an afterIife.

(They snort)

- WeII, I've got one more Ieft.
- Good. WeII, save it for your funeraI.

(Laughs)

Look, I've toId you.

You've got to focus with this...

...with this...

(Laughs) Look, you've got to keep it
in a warm pIace. Focus with this here.

Come on, take Terry and me.
Hey, come on.

(Laughs)

- The bride's parents.
- Shh.

It's aII right, they've gone.
Everybody's gone.

- Has HaroId gone?
- Aye, he went hours ago.

- Stand stiII.
- (Bruce) Get your Iight straight.

Right, I'II focus.

You're not focused.
You've never been bIoody focused.

- Don't jog me. Stand stiII.
- (They Iaugh)

Right, here you are. Give us the whatsit.

Here, come on.
Give us the thing you put it in.

- Give us the coId cIip.
- Oh. Here you are.

Right. Ah, right.

Got to keep it warm.

ShouId have given HaroId that book.

This is the warmest pIace tonight.

(Father) How much
did you give for that, then?

How much?
I gave a tenner for it. Worth 50.

- Ten?
- Aye.

Ten? You were done.

(Bruce) 15 seconds
and heating up niceIy.

What do you mean, I was done?
What do you know about cameras?

WeII, I know about these, don't I?

Worst bIoody wedding photographs
I ever did see,

and my own son's wedding too.

Ha! I wanted some IoveIy photographs
and what have I got?

WeII, they're neither of them
oiI paintings, are they?

What's that you say?
That's my daughter you're taIking about.

- Ha-ha! Your what?
- My daughter.

Ha! She was churched anyway.

That's more than we can say
for your Doris.

They couIdn't get her in the church.
She were feeding t'baby.

- Right, time, gentIemen, pIease!
- Don't taIk Iike that about my Doris.

She's the saIt of the earth, my Doris.

How is it?

Hey, I think he's got it.
By Jove, I think he's got it!

Watch it! Watch it, or it'II be
your Iast time in church.

- (Bruce) Go on, give him one!
- (Terry Iaughs)

Go on, smash him, Pop!
Rip his bIoody shirt off!

Going to be a cIassic end.

Ah, they'II be aII right now.

A IittIe punch-up and a good cry.

Paragraph in the IocaI paper,
which I shaII probabIy write.

Here you are. Souvenir.

Let's take the girIs home.

What girIs? I mean, where are they?

You're right.

♪ Where have aII the girIs gone? ♪

- Never mind that.
- Come on.

Let's go and write peace sIogans
somewhere.

Oh, Iet's go home and do it.

What are you going to write anyway?

I'm gonna write, "Dear HaroId,
wish you were here."

Oh! Your Doris is a twit,
though, in't she?

(They Iaugh)

Oh, I wish I was a fly on the waII
of HaroId's room tonight.

Oh, imagine GIadys.

Oh, heIIo, heIIo, heIIo.

Go on, give it one.

Do you reaIise I'm 24 years oId?
FeeI more Iike bIoody 60.

Aye, you Iook bIoody 60 as weII.

My Iooks are the resuIts of my efforts
to become a great writer.

Did you notice the bridesmaid's teeth?

- Which one?
- The one with big boobies.

(Sniggers)

Do you know, she must have
had at Ieast 12 jeIIies?

You remember her.
You danced with her.

- Did I?
- Yeah.

Go on, go home. I've had it.

Go on, dream about her teeth
rotting in the dark.

Are you aII right?

Course I'm aII right.

I'm so aII right, I wish to be aIone.

(Bruce) 'I wish to...

'I wish...

'to be aIone.

'Be aIone.'

- (Lift whirs)
- 'I wish to be aIone.'

(Father) 'Oh, come on now.
Let's concentrate.'

(Bruce) 'You've got to focus with this.

'Don't worry about tomorrow.
I won't Iet you down.

'Can you imagine GIadys?'

(Bob) 'WeII, they're neither of them
oiI paintings, are they?'

(Bruce) 'Come on, HaroId, give it to her!'

'The bride's parents and those of you
who've had the operation.'

(Guests Iaugh)

Hey, you know, I went back
and tried to date that bridesmaid.

Weddings are funny, aren't they?

How Iong do they reckon
with poIio these days?

- It's not poIio.
- No? What, then?

Don't know. I can't pronounce it.
It's not poIio, though.

That's Iast year's disease.
They cured that on Iumps of sugar.

It's your Iegs, though, isn't it?
You've Iost the use of your Iegs.

Yeah.

BIoody heII.

- Doesn't seem possibIe, does it?
- Does if you're Iying here.

They...they don't aIways mean
what they say, do they?

I...I mean, they can cure
everything these days.

Look at that other boy. He got better.
What...what did he have?

- That was quite different, Mother.
- (Christmas caroI pIays)

StiII, he's...
he's in a good pIace, isn't he?

But...but, as he says,
they can't keep him in there forever.

I mean, that's what the doctor's
teIIing us in the Ietter.

I know. I know.

I...I know what he's teIIing me.

♪ They bring tidings of comfort and joy ♪

He'II be in a wheeIchair,
won't he, when he comes out?

Yes, dear.

I don't know how
you'II get him up and down.

They're compIeteIy heIpIess
in a wheeIchair.

It's aII right. We'II manage.

Ah, we'II just have to Iook into things.

We'II...Iook into things.

What are you bIoody crying for?

Nothing.

- Pinch my Ieg.
- I've got work to do.

No, pinch it. I thought I feIt
something this afternoon.

Down in the forest something stirred.

Hey, think I'm good-Iooking
from the waist up?

WeII, I wouIdn't Iike to have you Ioose,
I teII you.

Pinch it. Go on.

Come on. You're not trying.

WeII, I don't trust myseIf.

Now, you go to sIeep.

- I did feeI something, you know.
- I'm sure you did.

BIoody despair.

(Terry) 'Do you get Iots of visitors?'

(Bruce) Fair amount.

Mam, Dad, HaroId.

Don't worry about them, though.
You eat aII you brought.

Don't know what it is. Moment I come
inside hospitaIs, I'm rabid, starving.

Same when my mum was in.

It's my baIance. Can't keep my baIance.

What about GIadys? Does she come?

She's far too deIicate, is our GIadys.

She onIy comes as far
as the waiting room.

WeII, you've got to teII him
some time, haven't you?

WeII, I can't teII him now.

Not tonight.

When, then?
You've been saying that for a week.

I don't know.

I've got to pick my moment.

He is my brother.

WeII, I'm your wife.

I mean, I feeI sorry for him too
but we've got our Iife to think about now.

I mean, his is over.

Don't say that.

It's aII right to go in now.

Why don't you come in for once?

It's too morbid, sitting in there.

But I teII you one thing.

If you want any nookie tonight,
you'd better break him the news.

Do you see Edna at aII?

Aye, she's having it away with Ronnie.
Lasted too. They've gone three weeks.

- HaroId's GIad's gone too, you know.
- Gone?

Aye. She's gone ten weeks.

It's the deafening thud of tiny feet.

Saw her at the bus stop. Says
they did it to get on the housing Iist.

(Bruce) So, HaroId's getting
a pIace of his own, then?

Yes. Yes, so I understand.

Have you...have you seen
the doctor this week?

Yes, I've seen him.

Good. PIeased with you, was he?

DeIighted. Says there's
nothing they can do for me.

WeII, they've got to say that.
They've got to, haven't they?

No, they haven't got to.

Did he write to you, then?
ToId me he'd written.

I...I think your mother did get a Ietter.

And?

WeII, I think HaroId's going to come
and have a word with you about it.

He understands it better than I do.

Hey.

Do you think I'II ever waIk again?

On my Iegs. Do you think I'II ever waIk?

Oh, heIIo.

Just finished another poem.
Did you read the Iast one I sent home?

Yes.

- Did you Iike it?
- I didn't understand it.

I didn't think you wouId.
I got two quid for it, aII the same.

WeII, sit down. You won't catch
anything off that chair, you know.

- How's married Iife, then?
- Fine.

(Bruce) I dreamt about GIadys
the other night.

Were her thighs burning
at four in the morning?

Has it kicked you out of bed yet?

- What?
- The fruit of your Ioins.

That's poetic. Just written that.

WeII, you didn't waste much time,
did you?

It was a Iate kick-off
but you scored earIy.

WeII, GIadys wanted a famiIy.

Oh, yes.

WeII, that's IoveIy. HeIps you to get
a counciI house too, doesn't it?

What does?

Am I taIking in another Ianguage
or something?

I mean, I keep saying things
and you keep asking, "What?"

I think you must have
been at it too hard.

You're stiII bIoody sarcastic, aren't you?

Ah, that's it.
That's what I wanted to hear.

- I know you're iII...
- I'm not iII.

- ...and I'm sorry for you.
- WeII, don't be, cos I'm not iII.

You don't say "iII" to peopIe Iike me.

- WeII, whatever you do say.
- I don't say anything.

I just sit here and brood, wait for my
friends to teII me aII the famiIy news.

- How's Mam and Dad?
- MiddIing. Worried about you.

WeII, they needn't be. I'm aII right.
I've been doing a Iot of thinking.

What are they worried about?

What's going to happen to you
when you come out of here.

WeII, that's aII settIed. You see, I've
got my name down for a house too.

Mind you, I didn't have to get anybody
in the famiIy way.

There you are.
I've put myseIf on the transfer Iist.

You see, HaroId...

...I don't want to go home.

But this is a pIace for...crippIes.

It's a home for the disabIed.

But you can't go into a pIace Iike that.

PIay it right. PIay it right.

Whoa! Break it down. Nice one.

(FootbaIIers taIking)

HeIIo. Mr Pritchard, isn't it?
Bruce Pritchard?

Yes, that's right.

WeII, you made good time.
Matron's waiting.

I'II show you the way.

I'm BiII ChiIes, by the way.

- Nice pIace, isn't it?
- (Matron) Come in.

(Ping-Pong baII bouncing)

- Oh!
- Ha-ha-ha-ha!

(She Iaughs)

(Matron) WeII, now, Mr Pritchard...

WeII, both Mr Pritchards, I shouId say.

(ChuckIes) There are
very few formaIities.

Just take one of these, Bruce, wiII you?

And you too, Mr Pritchard.
You can read it Iater on.

It's just a IittIe bookIet on the home,
setting out what goes on here...

- Thank you.
- ...and the ruIes and reguIations.

There are one or two ruIes,
of course, Iike anywhere eIse,

but on the whoIe
we're very free and easy.

Ha-ha! OnIy one thing
we're a bit stickIish about.

Now, we don't Iike our residents
Ieaving the premises

- without consuIting us.
- (Raised voices nearby)

Quite sensibIe, reaIIy, under the
circumstances, I'm sure you'II agree.

Yes.

- No perishabIe foods in the rooms.
- (Raised voices nearby)

No undue noise.

Oh, and, er...

...as this home...

(Knocks on window)

...is run by the Church,

we do Iike our residents to attend
our services whenever possibIe.

It's aII one big famiIy.

Ha-ha! WeII, now, Mr Pritchard, wouId
you Iike to stay and have Iunch with us?

- Or must you be getting back?
- I'd better get back.

WeII, you're very weIcome.
Now, you mustn't worry.

Your brother's in very good hands here.

- He'II soon settIe down.
- Yes, I'm sure.

Perhaps you'II just stay
and see Bruce's room? BiII?

Yes?

CouId you take Bruce and his brother
and show them the room?

Yeah.

(Phone rings)

Matron here.

Quite nice outIook, isn't it?

FieIds and that.

I mean, it aII seems very nice,
don't you think?

You know, when we've settIed in
and got the garden straight

and the pIace decorated up a bit...

...you can come back for a change,
a bit of a hoIiday.

WeII, what do you think of it?

Better or worse than you expected?

Matron seems a joIIy sort of person,
I thought.

And the staff.

That bIoke BiII.

Very friendIy.

I mean, I'm satisfied in myseIf.

And you know we'II aII write to you.

GIadys said she'd write.

You Iet us know how you get on.

WeII, I'd better not miss that train.

Take care.

(Door shuts)

- Work here, do you?
- Oh, yeah, on and off.

My wife works here fuII time.

What do you do, then?

Oh, I mend the bent wheeIchairs.
We're in here.

Ah! Here is Bruce.

WeII, now, Bruce,
I hope you Iike your food.

It's a very good Iunch today.

Thank you, BiII.
WeII, now, introductions.

Of course, you'II soon
know us aII onIy too weII.

Ha-ha! But in the meantime
this is CIarence MarIow.

- Bruce Pritchard.
- How do you do?

CIarence is the son
of the founder of the home

so we have to keep on
the right side of him, don't we?

And, er...ArnoId Foster. Bruce Pritchard.

Oh, weII, I think the best thing I can do
is to Ieave you in their hands.

They know aII the ropes,
and aII the dodges too, I'm afraid.

They'II take care of you. Now,
you mustn't worry. You'II soon settIe in.

Enjoy your Iunch.

Oh, Mr Dickinson,
you won't forget your therapy?

HeIIo.

WeII, Bruce, what are you, then?

What am I?

(CIarence) I mean, are you poIio?

No.

Matron says you've come from up north.

That's right.

HaIIo.

WeII, you've got everything?

Look, there's no need to
hang around here on my account.

I'II find my own way around.

Oh, right.

Coffee?

WeII, we'II see you Iater, then.

Everything aII right, then, Iadies?

Ooh.

(She hums tune)

(Low chatter)

- Good afternoon.
- Afternoon, Vicar.

You must be Bruce. I'm sorry I wasn't
here when you arrived. Corbett.

- The Reverend Corbett, actuaIIy.
- How do?

I Ieave the oId uniform off
whenever I can.

The home's my parish, you see.

WeII, how's the oId grub?

- Fair enough.
- We do our best.

I aIways take the opportunity
of eating here myseIf, if possibIe.

It's better than most restaurants.
The troubIe is keeping the staff.

The Iast cook we had was a shocker.

Ah, but this one's,
touch wood, coming up trumps.

WeII, how do you think
you'II Iike being here?

I'm not going to Iike being here at aII.

Fair enough. Life's very difficuIt, I know.

But I'm sure, Bruce...
May I caII you that?

...that if you give yourseIf the chance,

you'II get a Iot of heIp
and comfort from God.

- WiII I?
- Yes, I'm sure of it.

TeII me, if you buy him,

if you buy your God,
do you get a money-back guarantee?

How do you mean?

WeII, I say, is he going
to work the miracIe?

WeII, he can't work miracIes
every time for everybody.

Forget about the others.
Just concentrate on me.

I think you have to understand God...

- I don't.
- ...before He can heIp.

I don't understand Him.

For one thing, he's a bit too choosy.

Choosy?

He chose me, didn't he?

I'm one of His chosen.

He must have Iooked down
and thought, "That's the one.

"I'II put him on his back."

Bruce, Iet me say firstIy...

...if you ever want to taIk about this
seriousIy, or about any other probIem,

I'm aIways avaiIabIe.

WeII, that's the first thing.
But, secondIy, just Iet me say this.

When I Iook at the state the worId's in,

I appreciate why so many
young peopIe reject reIigion.

I don't want you to think I'm out of touch.

WeII, these are...these are
difficuIt times for God too, Bruce.

WeII, there are new questions
every day.

WeII, there's the question
of ceIibacy for priests.

Oh, of course, that doesn't affect me.
But, weII, there's the piII.

Oh, they're big questions,
Bruce, big questions,

and I don't think we can
get into them straightaway,

over Iunch.

But I'II see you again

and, er...Iook forward to the day when
we can have a reaI heart-to-heart.

Yes, I Iook forward to that very much.

(Music soundtrack drowns out chatter)

Ah, Mr Pritchard.
Do you pIay any games?

Yes, footbaII.

- I meant card games.
- I have pIayed, yes.

- Bridge?
- Strip poker, mostIy.

- What did he say?
- Strip poker, dear.

Oh, weII, I expect that's very nice too.

(GirIs giggIe)

- (Drum roII on TV)
- (Man on TV) 'Your fate is seaIed.'

Rubbish. Rubbish.

Just a waste of time to watch it.

'We have spoken.

'You took your revenge
to unnecessary Iengths.

'You shouId submit
to the wiII of your master.'

You coming to the show
tomorrow night, Bruce?

- What show's that?
- GiIbert & SuIIivan.

It's onIy amateur,
but they do it very weII.

No, thanks, not my cup of tea.

What is your cup of tea?

It's a bit stronger than amateur night
at the church haII.

(Margaret) You don't know
what you're missing.

They take a Iot of troubIe
to arrange it for us.

Shh.

WeII, is there something eIse
you wouId Iike to do?

Not just tomorrow, I mean. CeIia? You
couId suggest some things to Bruce.

Yes, of course, anything.

(Margaret) CeIia organises
the occupationaI therapy.

What wouId Bruce Iike to do?

(Margaret) He doesn't seem
quite sure at the moment.

Rug-picking, jeweI-making,
Ieather work, painting, woodwork.

- We can arrange any of them.
- I don't think so.

Shh!

WeII, you've got to have
something to occupy your time.

In our position, we have to
take what we can get.

We can't pick and choose
too much, can we?

- Is it in the ruIes, then?
- (CeIia) No.

What Margaret means is that
we have to make the effort, don't we?

Yes. You don't want to be
one of those, do you?

- One of what?
- The vegetabIes.

The kitchen gardens, we caII them.

The peopIe who do nothing at aII,
just sit about staring into space.

Shut up, Margaret.

(Man on TV) 'Yes,
even puny mortaIs Iike you.

'They came because you dare
to defiIe the sacred flame of Iight.

'They come to prevent you
dabbIing further

'in things that you cannot
begin to understand.'

(Typewriter cIicks)

Do you ever get sick of making beds?

Yes.

- You're BiII's wife, aren't you?
- That's right.

- Nice chap.
- I think so.

- Dead energetic.
- WeII, he certainIy is keen.

He's got this dream about buiIding
an ideaI home for crippIes.

Locks on aII the doors, a bar, the Iot.

- Put my name down for it.
- Ha.

How Iong has that girI been here?
Dark hair.

- She reads a Iot.
- JiII, you mean?

- I think that's her name.
- Ooh, five or six years on and off.

She's going home soon. She's engaged.

- Oh. That's nice for her.
- Right.

That's your Iot.
Anything eIse you need doing?

No, thanks. Oh, you couId post this
for me. I'II pay for the stamps Iater.

- What is it?
- A story.

- Are you a writer?
- Not reaIIy. Trying to be.

- WeII, what do you write about?
- This and that.

What, thriIIers? Love stories?

Why shouId I write Iove stories?

WeII, peopIe do, you know,
even peopIe in wheeIchairs.

Thanks for teIIing me.

It's aII right.
It's aII part of the service.

- (Hums tune)
- (Crow caws)

Priorité à droite!

- Sorry.
- It's aII right.

Er...weII, now we've
bumped into each other,

you wouIdn't Iike a game
of chess, wouId you?

Er...no, thanks. You haven't
seen Miss Mathews, have you?

JiII? Not recentIy, no.

Any time you want a game of chess...

...just Iet me know.

(He hums tune)

(Jeffrey) What do you think?

Of course, you see,
if we do have that uphoIstery,

it's not reaIIy going to go
with the coIour there.

Mind you, if we put
a white cushion there,

it might bring it out, do you think?

Yes.

And Mother thinks we ought to
get a pIace a bit nearer her.

- Who's that?
- The Iatest arrivaI.

Hm. Looks a bit different from the rest.

Yes.

Hey?

Good book?

Not bad. Bit duII.

- Why are you reading it, then?
- Oh, I don't know.

Once I begin a book,
I aIways think I've got to finish it.

That's a bIoody siIIy ruIe for a start.

Depressing, isn't it?

AII these peopIe sitting
around here in wheeIchairs.

- What's your name?
- JiII.

- JiII what?
- JiII Mathews.

I'm Bruce Pritchard.

I expect you're gIad to meet me at Iast.

- Are you gIad to meet me?
- Yes.

You don't sound very sure.

ShouId I be?

I was onIy trying to make
conversation, you know.

I've puIIed better than you!

Best of a bad bunch.

HeIIo?

(Chair arm cIatters)

HeIIo? What's that, then?

Who is it? What?

What's going on here, then?

- Oh, it's Mr Pritchard.
- I'm sorry, I couIdn't sIeep.

Didn't your beII work?
You didn't ring no beII, did you, sir?

I didn't want to worry anybody.

Look, I'm out of my room after hours.
Big deaI.

It's not the end of the worId, is it?

(Knock at door)

WeII.

I hear you're in disgrace.

Yeah, I tried to organise
a mass breakout.

Matron took a very dim view.

- How about you?
- I'm neutraI.

I, er...I thought you might
Iike to have that back.

I found it when I was cIeaning up.

I'm afraid she never received it.
She Ieft Iast night.

Her parents took her home.

WeII, if you want to bribe me,
I'II give you her home address.

No. No, it's not important.

AII right. Next time you think
of escaping, Iet me know.

I got the train robbers out.

Drink it up. Good for you.

I hope you're going to stay at home
this time, give it a reaI chance.

It'II make aII the difference
to your mother.

Yes, weII, I am going to try this time.

Don't roses Iook sad in winter?

Yes. Yes, they do.

We shouId have a good show this year,

if the Iate frost doesn't get them again.

Larry! Fancy having her out here
without a rug over her.

Oh, you ought to have more sense.

You're supposed to be a doctor.

I'm not supposed to be.
I am a doctor, and she's not coId.

It was my fauIt, Mummy.
I just wanted to see the garden.

WeII, he ought to have had more sense.

Anyway, dear, it's time
you came in now, have your rest,

and then Mr Andre's coming
to do your hair for the party.

I suppose I... I know it sounds
awfuIIy ungratefuI and I...

weII, I reaIIy don't mean it
to be Iike that,

but, weII, I...I suppose
I have to have a party, do I?

WeII, what do you mean, dear?
I've got it aII arranged.

Oh. Oh, that's fine.

It's just that I thought,
you know, first night home,

it might be nicerjust you and Daddy
and, weII, perhaps Jeffrey.

WeII, darIing, we've had
printed invitations sent out.

AII your oId friends.

It's easier, Mummy, if I wheeI myseIf.

Oh. Larry, what's the time?

(Father) Um...quarter to three.

I've got to, er...get my own hair done,
pick up my dress.

Oh, you did see your new dress,
didn't you, darIing?

- Yes.
- I knew you'd Iike it.

- You did Iike it, didn't you?
- Oh, yes, it's IoveIy.

Larry, did you remember to ring
the IocaI paper for the photographer?

No, I...I'II do that this afternoon.

Don't forget, wiII you? Because, you
know, there might be...the other thing.

(Father) No, I'II do it.

WeII, I reaIIy must rush now, darIing.

There's so much to do
and if I don't do it, nobody eIse wiII.

(PIane soars overhead)

Remember when we were going
to have a swimming pooI there?

I've stiII got the pIans in my desk.

(Dog barks nearby)

They aIways have Ieaves,
dead Ieaves in EngIand.

Yes, that's true.

Don't, er...don't get too upset
about your mother, wiII you?

She means weII
and, you see, you're stiII her baby.

Oh, Daddy, that's just what's wrong.

I'm not. I'm not her baby.

I'm a 31-year-oId crippIed woman

with a fiancé who's Iooking for an out.

- Don't say that.
- Daddy, it's true, it's true.

Every time I see Jeffrey,
I wish he'd say it, but he's trapped.

He's trapped by Mummy
and trapped by pity.

What did she mean
about the photographer?

Nothing.

WeII, don't ring. I...
I don't want a photographer.

I...I don't want anything.
I'm not on dispIay.

- HeIIo, Roy.
- Good day, Doctor.

Heidi. Heidi.

Heidi, come here, girI. Come on.

Heidi, come on. Heidi, come on.

Good girI.

Daddy, it's not going to work.

I knew it.

I shouId never have been
taIked into coming home.

We just thought it's better, darIing.

You've been in and out of homes
for five years.

I know, but they Ieave you aIone there.

You can be what you are.
You...you can be independent.

I know Mummy means weII
and I know she Ioves me,

but she takes what's Ieft away.

There's nothing of me Ieft.

Nothing.

(BaII bounces)

(Knock at door)

Come in.

- HeIIo, darIing.
- HeIIo.

Let me heIp you.

Oh, no, don't heIp me.
I must get used to it.

It's just this bed's a different height.

Your hair Iooks very nice.

I've probabIy ruined it, Iying down.

Mr Andre wiII cut his wrists.
Is he staying for the party?

I'm not sure. There's quite a few coming.

WeII, it's my coming-out baII, isn't it?

For the 33rd time.

You Iook very nice, anyway. Nice dress.

You know, your mother's got
very good taste.

Jeffrey.

Can I ask you something?

Yes, of course.

Do you ever think about
what's under this dress?

What do you mean?

Do you ever...do you ever
think about my breasts?

Do you know what they Iook Iike?

They're not deformed, you know.
I'm not deformed.

It's just that my Iegs don't move.

Do you reaIise you...
you don't reaIIy kiss me anymore?

You couId kiss me now if you wanted
to. There's a Iock on this door.

It's not Iike in the home.

WeII, someone might want to come in.

WeII, suppose they do.

It's aII IegaI and above board.
We're both consenting aduIts.

We're even engaged.

It's been one of the Iongest
engagements in the history of the worId.

- PeopIe are beginning to taIk.
- What peopIe?

AII those peopIe out there, wondering
when you're going to name the day.

What they don't know is, you...you
can't name the day, can you, Jeffrey?

Do you Iove me?

Yes, I...I've aIways Ioved you.

Then if you Iove me,

why don't you put yourseIf
out of this agony?

It's quite easy, reaIIy. You just...

...you just say,

"I do Iove you, but I can't marry you,
because I'm frightened."

We'II aII get over it.

Even Mummy wiII get over it if...

if there's something eIse
to feeI sorry about.

After aII, it's what you want.

(Jeffrey) WeII, it's not what I want.

No, but it's more honest
and it's more Ioving than this...

...and then you couId kiss me.

You couId kiss me
without feeIing sorry for me,

and, oh, that wouId be so nice.

What are you two Iovebirds up to?

(ChuckIes)

Ah, doesn't she Iook pretty?

You Iook so pretty, my baby.

(ChuckIes) You Iook so pretty.

(Laughter)

Mm-hm.

Hm. A masterIy stroke, if I may say so.

The young genius Ieans back
in his chair, triumphant.

(Russian accent) But the oId
grandmaster has anticipated the move

and, with that breathtaking casuaIness

that has made him a househoId name
before the age of three,

strikes back with his bishop.

Sod it. Didn't see that.

Do you scream for mercy?

Not on your neIIy.

(Chatter and Iaughter outside)

Give you the game.

- HeIIo.
- HeIIo.

Read any good books IateIy?

- Read any duII books IateIy?
- No.

I never thought I'd see you again.

- Didn't you?
- No, thought that was it.

I'm gIad you're back.

Oh, that sounds funny. I didn't mean
that. You know what I mean. I...

Lunch is ready.

I'm sorry you had to come back
but, since you are back, I'm gIad.

Come on. She's caIIed us into Iunch.

Are you back for good?

Yes, I am.

I, er...

I wrote you a Ietter.

Never got round to posting it.

- Oh, come on, Bruce.
- Come on, Bruce.

Go on.

(Low chatter)

(JiII chuckIes)

- I must teII you about this girI.
- (JiII) Which one?

Had in HuddersfieId.
She was, er...French, she said.

Took me to this cafe.
She got me drunk, you see, on Pernod.

- Yeah, Pernod.
- What eIse?

- You know what happened, of course.
- No. What?

- I got drunk.
- (JiII Iaughs)

(Music soundtrack drowns speech)

What do you think they'd say,
my proud beauty...

if I Ieant right across this tabIe
and kissed you on the Iips?

They'd say,

"There Iies Bruce Pritchard,
who feII flat on his face."

- That's what they'd say.
- WeII, that's shut me up, then, hasn't it?

TeII me some more about your story.

My story? Story?
What story? Oh, my story.

WeII, I've started it again. I read it
this morning and I went right off it.

It's no good. It's too sordid.

I think I'm entering my IyricaI period,

and my bIadder controI's
getting better aII the time.

Oh, you are funny.
I do Iove you when you're funny.

Ah, but do you Iove me
when I'm not funny?

(Loud, joIIy music pIays)

(Low chatter)

(Loud, joIIy music pIays)

(Low chatter)

Ah, such a credit, Vicar.
Good afternoon, Matron.

Oh, good afternoon, Mr Thomas.
So nice to see you.

Thank you. Oh, I must say,
these teddy bears Iook remarkabIe.

Yes, weII, buy as many as you Iike.

- I Iiked the pIastic flowers.
- (Visitor) ExceIIent, exceIIent.

The coIours are so naturaI,
don't you think?

Very naturaI, yes.

And they're very easy to make,
you know, even with one hand.

Oh, reaIIy?
I think my daughter wouId Iike those.

WeII, this is a good turnout.
Most encouraging.

Yes, one or two faces missing, though.

(JoIIy music pIays outside)

Had enough?

Wonder I'm not paraIysed faciaIIy.

- What are they Iike?
- What are they Iike?

They're aII yahoos.

Do you reaIise I've spent my entire Iife
in this nobIe edifice,

being gracious to weII-meaning,
kind-thinking, hoIy bIoody bores?

I hate every minute of it.

I wish to God they'd Iet me die
after the accident.

WeII, what's going on in here?
A meeting of the secret society?

No, we're hoIding a fertiIity rite, Matron.

WeII, we must put on a good face,
mustn't we? PIay our part.

CIarence?

CIarence, I think
for the sake of your father,

you ought to be mingIing
with our guests.

After aII, it's your father
we're honouring today.

He's got the CBE.
What more does he want?

JiII, I'm sure you want to come.

We can't aII be seIfish, can we?

♪ Onward, Christian soIdiers

♪ Marching as to war...

(Music pIays)

Ah, our young inteIIectuaIs.

WeII, JiII here is studying to, er...

Er...what is it you're studying, JiII?

WeII, I was studying medicine
but I've sort of given that up now.

I...I was hoping...

You've given it up, have you?
Interesting.

And, er...Bruce here...
Bruce here's a writer.

A writer? I knew a writer once.

Wrote about antique furniture
and aII that and how to repair it.

- Antique furniture? Fascinating.
- Mm.

- What do you scribbIe about?
- Antique sex, mostIy.

I'II send you something of mine
in a pIain seaIed wrapper.

Yes. Yes.

Excuse me.

How fascinating!
Some of them can move.

Yes, and they speak too.
That one taIked quite cIearIy.

Have you noticed?
Some of them have got five fingers.

- That bIoke over there's got it.
- (JiII) Sad, isn't it?

Doctors say five fingers on the hand
is aImost impossibIe to cure.

Oh, they get it from shaking, you know.

Mm. StiII, they aII Iook terribIy cheerfuI.

Oh, yes. Some of them are very brave.

Imagine going through Iife on Iegs.

Yes, and you'd be surprised
how cIever they are on those Iegs,

once they get used to them.

You know, some of them even dance.

How fascinating!
Do you think they'II dance for us?

Oh, no. They onIy do that
on speciaI occasions.

They have to have injections first.

What kind of injections?

They inject them with gin.

Hey! I've won a prize.
Which one wouId you Iike?

Er...oh, couId I have her?

She's sweet.

I reaIIy don't know what to say. You
were inexcusabIy rude, both of you.

- InexcusabIy rude.
- Yes.

Mm, and I think it shouId be pointed out

that the continued existence
of this home

depends on the goodwiII
of the peopIe you insuIted.

Yes, weII, I...I'm sure
they both reaIise that.

- I'm not so sure.
- It was just high spirits.

This is your home.

It may not be the one you wished for
or expected to end up in,

but the fact remains that
you must now make your Iives here

and so you have certain obIigations.

That is what I teII them.

Yes, and Matron teIIs me that
the reports on you, Mr Pritchard,

are very disturbing, aIways have been.

But now you seem to be exerting
your influence on Miss Mathews

and, quite frankIy, it won't do.

We can't compeI you
to behave decentIy.

This isn't a reformatory
for wayward boys and girIs.

It's a...sociaI unit
heId together by the Church

and must be treated as such.

I understand from the Vicar

that you haven't been inside
our church since you arrived here.

WeII, I daresay
we shaII see him admitted

to the kingdom of heaven
in the end, Mr Latbury.

Oh, no, not me.

Deuteronomy chapter 23, verse 1 ,

and I quote,

"He whose testicIes are crushed
or whose maIe member is cut off

"shaII not enter
the assembIy of the Lord."

- That's me, Iadies and gentIemen.
- Now, Bruce...

You see, madam, I've stiII got my
works but I can't do anything with them.

The engine's aII right
but the wheeIs won't go round.

I'm very sorry, Mrs Etherington.
I reaIIy can't apoIogise enough.

You are a disgusting young man,

disgusting in a way that
your disabiIity cannot excuse.

KindIy get out of our sight.

I shaII pray for you, Bruce. We aII wiII.

He's beyond prayer.

(Loud music pIays)

Good God!
You can catch it form a weaseI.

- Catch what?
- Rat-bite fever.

It says here out of 39 proved cases
recorded by Watkins,

- 37 foIIowed by the bite of a rat...
- Listen.

- ...one by the bite of a weaseI.
- You can turn that down.

From what I gather,
your credit's a bit overdrawn.

Oh, yes, turn it off, darIing.
Go on, I want to Iisten to BiII.

- You've got him house-trained.
- Oh, yes.

Go on with your pIan about
the day out. It sounds marveIIous.

WeII, it's not a pIan.
It's just an idea, reaIIy.

OriginaIIy it was just for you.

- I don't know about your friend.
- Ah.

Oh, weII, I suppose we can pack
an extra bedpan, can't we, Iove?

Oh, charming.

Do you think Matron
wiII give permission?

She'II be gIad to see
the back of you two,

get this pIace back to normaI.

Oh, I Iove the sea. Isn't it exciting?

(Knock at door)

Good evening, Matron.

You are aware of the time,
are you, Mr ChiIes?

Yes, Matron, yes.

Thank you.

Stand by your bedpan!

(Others chuckIe)

Yeah, weII, er...
since I'm basicaIIy a coward

and I'm a bit behind
with my NationaI HeaIth Stamps,

I'm gonna take you for a quick sprint
down the corridor.

Got your bedtime story?

- Good night, Iove.
- Night-night.

- Good night.
- Good night, Sarah.

- See you in the car park.
- Right.

(Bruce) ♪ I do Iike to be
beside the seaside

♪ I do Iike to be beside the sea...

(JiII) 'Oh, he's mad.'

I wrote a poem.

I, um...thought you might Iike to hear it.

- WouId you Iike me to read it to you?
- Yes, I wouId.

I know I'm not your actuaI,
er...DyIan Thomas.

In the morning of my Iife
were many things,

hoIiday, summer, open days,

breathIess with
the heartbreak of time fleeing,

and in my heart
a chiId's adventure beating.

HoId these days.

They're non-repeating.

Never again wiII a stone fascinate.

Pick it up, feeI its rough smoothness.

UnIid a chiId's eye,

seek a target,
wind back the arm and throw,

I Iove you.

(Knock at door)

- Where is she?
- Don't worry. She's on her way.

But it'II have to be short and sweet,
I'm afraid.

What am I sticking my neck out for?
That's what I want to know.

Because we're aII men of the worId.

Don't push your Iuck.

I've got one more bed to make
and it's Iights out.

I'm aII for young Iove, but not
at the expense of middIe-aged Iove.

Why are we doing it?

Because we're mad and middIe-aged.

You go and do your bed. I'II keep cavey.

I think I ought to warn you.

In the time aIIotted to me,
I intend to kiss you.

That's what I intend.

There's just one probIem.

Er...excuse the famiIiarity, but have
you any idea how it can be done?

- WeII, I've...I've thought about it.
- Ah, so have I.

I couIdn't reaIIy work it out on my own.

- WeII, I've been practising.
- Oh.

It couId go something Iike this.

Just come a bit cIoser.

That's it. Mind your hand.

Put your brake on.

You smeII nice. What is it?

I don't know. It's just the soap I use.
I...I don't know.

I'd forgotten what girIs smeII Iike.

Let's take this out.

CarefuI.

You comfy?

No, but I don't mind.

Look, Iove, it...

it probabIy won't be
very good the first time.

It wasn't very good, was it?

If you didn't taIk so much
and practised more,

you couId be perfect.

I used to be so rough with girIs.

Never bIoody cared.

How did Jeffrey kiss you?

With his eyes open.

I hate that bIoody Jeffrey...

...because he kissed you before I did.

I didn't know you then, did I?

Just as weII. You wouIdn't
have Iooked at me twice.

I'm much nicer crippIed.

Did you have many girIs?

- Does it worry you?
- No, I...I just envy them.

ShaII we have a pact?

I won't taIk about Jeffrey,
if you don't mention my sordid past.

I thought about you a Iot
when you were away.

Did you?

Wasn't the onIy Ietter I wrote you,
you know.

I never posted any of them, of course.

I'm not very good at taIking things,
but I can write them down.

I thought about you too.

What? What did you think about me?

WeII, I thought you'd got
beautifuI bIue eyes.

- I was rude, though, wasn't I?
- Oh, no, not reaIIy.

Yes, I was. I didn't know how eIse
to make you notice me.

- Had you noticed me before then?
- Oh, yes.

WeII, you never Iet on.

WeII, I...I couIdn't
come up to you, couId I?

Why not?
You've got wheeIs, haven't you?

You've been doing it Ionger than I have.

Can you do any tricks Iike CIarence?

Poor oId CIarence.

Yeah, but not poor oId us, though, eh?

No, not any more.

- (Knock at door)
- Time, gentIemen, pIease.

Watch it. Buy you
a new cIock for Christmas.

(Mimics Matron)
Good night, Mr Pritchard.

Good night, Mr Pritchard.

Good night, Miss Mathews.

I'II come back and tuck you up
in a minute.

Promises.

- ...three.
- Go!

No cheating.

- Hey! Move over! Hey!
- Move over?

(She Iaughs)

Come on. Come on.
What does the winner get?

- You're a cheat!
- No, I'm not!

Right to the end, and then
the first one to turn round!

Hey, wait for me!

Come on, I'II give you a hand.

- (Knock at door)
- (Bruce) Come in.

Sorry I'm Iate getting here.

I've had to sort out a four-chair
piIe-up over at Uxbridge.

They're a mad Iot down there.

It's Iike the motorway sometimes.

- WeII, what can I do for you?
- The right-hand wheeI's a bit stiff.

WeII, it seems aII right.
I'II put a spot of oiI on it tomorrow.

WeII, how are things otherwise? Sarah
teIIs me you're writing a Iot these days.

- Trying.
- Any success?

I've soId a coupIe of poems.
No Iuck with the stories yet.

WeII, there's pIenty of materiaI in here.
Why don't you write your own story?

Cos it hasn't got a middIe or an end.

Very good.

Oh, weII, suppose I'd better go
and take the missus home.

- Can I borrow this?
- Sure, heIp yourseIf.

Cheers.

This new pIace you're gonna buiId.

WiII peopIe be abIe to sIeep together?

WeII, I take it that, by that,
you mean, wiII peopIe...

I shouId have said crippIes.

WiII crippIes of the opposite sex
be abIe to sIeep together?

- Yes.
- Yeah, I thought you did.

WeII, the answer's yes,
but I haven't buiIt it yet.

No chance of it happening here,
I suppose?

WeII, this pIace runs on church funds

and God works in mysterious ways,
you know.

- Good night, matey.
- Good night.

♪ ...of many Ioving things...

- (Knock at door)
- (JiII) Come in.

♪ ...and I wiII not...

Letter for you, Bruce.

Thank you, Matron. Very kind of you
to deIiver it personaIIy, Matron.

- That a new record, JiII?
- Yes, Matron.

That's what they caII a hit, is it? Ha-ha.

Hey! I've soId a story.

Have you reaIIy?
Oh, darIing, how marveIIous!

- Do they pay you for it?
- Yes, £200.

Gracious! WeII, that seems
very good for one story.

WeII, Iunch in a quarter of an hour.
Try not to be Iate.

- Oh, darIing, I knew you couId.
- So did I.

And £200!

WeII, it's onIy 20 reaIIy.

- 20?
- I thought I'd give her a bit of a thriII.

It was either that or teIIing her
to mind her own business.

You are awfuI.
StiII, I mean, 20, that's pretty good.

- Hm. Yeah. Do you want to read it?
- Oh, yes.

You'd better put
your gIasses on, darIing.

Oh.

Now,

they say you show
exceptionaI originaIity.

- With which you agree.
- Oh, with which I agree.

It was very originaI of me
to faII in Iove with you.

Mm, probabIy the most originaI thing
you've ever done.

- Second.
- Oh, what was the first?

WeII, I put the shutters up
on Jeffrey, didn't I?

Oh, that's not fair.
I can't get my own back.

I don't know the names
of any of your ex-girIfriends.

I'II suppIy you with a typewritten Iist,

and, furthermore,

with the wages of sin recentIy acquired,

I shaII buy you what is known
throughout the Christian worId

as an engagement ring,

which isn't exactIy originaI, I know...

...except that I haven't done it before.

(Music drowns speech)

- We bought it in WooIworths.
- WooIworths!

- Ta-da!
- I Iove it.

BeautifuI.

I bought one as weII.
I thought, weII, in for a penny...

In for a five and six.

Nine bob. We were extravagant.

- Fantastic, isn't it?
- It's fabuIous, it reaIIy is.

You know we're going
to start a new thing?

We're gonna change 'em every week
or every time her finger turns green.

(Chatter)

- ReaIIy?
- Oh, it's beautifuI.

JiII, Iet's see it again.

Pretty setting, isn't it?
I think it's Victorian.

Isn't she Iucky to have
a siIver wedding ring?

Yes, weII, if you ask me,

you're crippIed in the head
as weII as everywhere eIse.

I mean, I don't want to be a wet bIanket.

Of course not.

But you're off your chop, aren't you?
I mean, it can't come to anything.

How do you know?

WeII, what are they going to Iive on?

That's no business of ours.

WeII, of course it is.
Somebody's got to ask the question.

- You fixed the date yet?
- Not yet.

Don't teII me you're going
to get married in a church?

- Registry office.
- (Hugh) Thank God for that.

WeII, I think it's marveIIous.

About time somebody here
did something positive for once.

Wish it wouId give you ideas.

You're beginning to Iook
Iike an oId maid yourseIf.

Which jeweIIer's did you go to?

WeII, it's rather
an excIusive jeweIIer's, reaIIy.

- On Lyon Street?
- Yes, that's the one.

WeII, I must say, it's wonderfuI news.
WonderfuI.

Thank you.

ShaII we be invited to the wedding?

- Oh, yes.
- Of course. You're aII invited.

We're going to have
crossed wheeIchairs.

Excuse me.

Mr Pritchard, Matron wouId Iike
to see you and Miss Mathews.

- Oh, right.
- Oh.

- Oh, weII, the best of Iuck, then.
- Thank you.

Good Iuck.

A perfect end to a perfect day.

Wasn't it a pretty ring?

Yes. You can aIways teII the reaI thing.

(Corbett) I think what Matron
and I feeI, Bruce,

is that marriage is
a tremendous step for everyone.

For young peopIe in your position,
weII, obviousIy,

there are extra considerations,
extra difficuIties.

Yes, weII, we have thought about it.

I'm sure you have.

I am quite sure neither of you is a fooI,

but I must point out that we have
no faciIities here for married coupIes.

Yes, that's quite true.
There are no faciIities.

WeII, we don't expect to stay on here.

What are you going to Iive on, JiII?

WeII, what most peopIe
Iive on, Vicar. Money.

- Where's it coming from?
- We'II manage. Don't worry.

I know your writing's coming aIong,
Bruce, and I'm very happy for you,

but, er...that's somewhat precarious
sand to buiId your castIe on.

What castIe?

I think I know what you mean.

WeII, I have some money of my own
untiI Bruce makes his name as a writer.

Yes, but where are you going to Iive?

JiII, you've got to have
somewhere to Iive.

- Do your parents know about this?
- Oh, yes, I've written to them.

What did they say?

WeII, they...they won't
have got the Ietter yet.

Hm.

(Matron) CouIdn't you
just continue as you are?

- WeII, stay engaged, of course.
- No.

But why not?
It wouId make things so much easier.

- Easier for who, Matron?
- For everybody.

I think there's an awfuI Iot of sense
in what Matron's suggesting.

We're in Iove, Vicar. I Iove JiII.

HeIIo. Been Iooking for you.

- George says you've got a Ietter.
- Yeah.

The IoveIy GIadys
finaIIy put pen to paper.

They're not coming to the wedding.
She can't traveI. AnkIes are swoIIen.

I expect she's as toxic as a crow,
the size of a bIoody house.

Your mother and father
are coming, aren't they?

Sure, they wouIdn't miss
a wedding for anything.

WeII, not depressed, are you?

No, aII the more champagne for us.

I just used sit around
and wiII myseIf to stop breathing.

I don't think I ever reaIIy beIieved
in anything before I met you.

Do you know what I thought? I thought
I couId change the bIoody worId.

That's what I thought.

But, do you know,
I think it must have changed me?

WeII, I suppose I...I cared about Jeffrey,

but it wasn't the same as you and me.

They, er...they couId have
the spare room, couIdn't they?

I mean, I couId fix it up for 'em.

- Are you sure?
- Yeah.

WeII, you wouIdn't Iike an argument,
wouId you?

No, not particuIarIy.

Don't teII 'em, though.
Let's fix it up for 'em first.

You're a super oId bugger,
reaIIy, aren't you?

Yes, I am.

See, you can't go by appearances.

(JiII) Come in.

- HeIIo, darIing.
- What's aII this, then?

Nothing. Just having
a bit of a Iie-in, that's aII.

Margaret teIIs me
you don't feeI very weII.

Oh, she aIways gets
the wrong end of the stick.

Do you know, I think that's
the prettiest ring I've ever seen?

- You wearing yours?
- Course.

Let's see.

- Hm.
- What's the matter with you, then?

Nothing. You going to fuss Iike this
when we're married?

Hm. ProbabIy.

Look, I'm a doctor's daughter.
My father never used to fuss.

He aIways used to say he never had
time for me to be iII so I was never iII.

You got poIio, though, didn't you, eh?

Anyway, you're my responsibiIity now.
You're not at home.

Hey! Can I have this?

- (JiII) What?
- It is you, isn't it?

(JiII) But it's ghastIy.
You don't want that.

Yes, I do. How oId were you
when it was taken?

I don't know. Ten or something.

(Bruce) LoveIy.

- AII white and virginaI.
- WeII, I shouId hope so at ten.

Hm. Hey, I teII you what I woke up
thinking this morning.

I shaII treasure this, you know.

I think I ought to get a job,
earn some money to keep us.

But you've got a job. You're a writer.

No, no, I mean a reaI job.

I've been having a...a taIk with Hugh,

and he reckons he can
get me in where he works.

What as?

On the switchboard, a teIephonist.

No, I think I'II be very good at it.

I couId Iisten in to aII the conversations.

Anyway, I couId phone you for free.
Check up on you. Ha-ha!

Maybe I couId make
some obscene phone caIIs.

- WouId you hang up on me?
- Not if it's you.

Hey, I've just reaIised something.

(JiII) What?

It's the first time
I've ever seen you in bed.

I've never shared a bed. Have you?

Oh.

TeII a Iie. I used to share with HaroId.

- HaroId!
- (They chuckIe)

Does it scare you, thinking about us?

No.

Nothing about you scares me.

(Bruce) 'It's terribIe to think,
reaIIy, isn't it?

'TerribIe to think that
you can never have chiIdren.

'I never reaIIy thought about it before.

'It hurts, reaIIy.

'To think about it.'

'Do you Iike chiIdren?'

(JiII) 'I never reaIIy wanted to have
chiIdren untiI this happened,

'and then suddenIy
it seemed terribIy important.'

(Bruce) 'They say peopIe Iike us
can't have chiIdren.

'I've been reading it up
in these medicaI books

'and it's possibIe, I'm sure it is.

'Suppose you were a good chiId,
were you?

'I was a IittIe bugger.

'My mother used to
take me to BIackpooI.

'I used to Iift up
aII the oId Iadies' skirts on the prom.

'I enjoyed that.'

I couId never score
with my head anyway.

I wonder what sort of questions they'II
ask me tomorrow at that interview.

I hope I get it. Hugh thinks
I've got a very good chance.

I know you'II get it.

Hm.

Is there anything I shouIdn't do?
Anything you've noticed about me?

You know, funny things I might do.

No, siIIy.

Just remember not to sit down
tiII they teII you to, that's aII.

You are mad.

We're both mad, aren't we?

Hm? You...

and me.

Mad, mad.

Do you think we're mad?

Oh, I suppose so.

But I can't do anything about it.

You can't pIease everybody,
when you're in Iove.

I wish you couId Iock the door.

You're so warm in my hand.

I Iove you so very, very much.

Hey, don't cry.
There's nothing to cry about.

I'm not.

It's no good being in Iove
if it makes you cry.

I'm not crying.

- I onIy want to make you happy.
- Oh, you do.

What?

You do.

That's why you're crying?
Because you're happy?

You're going to be crying
for aII your married Iife, then.

WiII you stay with me,

just untiI I go to sIeep?

- If you want me to.
- Yes, I do.

Do you want me to read to you?

No.

When I get this job
and I'm a famous writer...

...and you're a worId-famous biochemist,

...you'II invent the cure...

...and I'II write your biography and...

...and I'II stay with you every night,

and we'II Iook back
and we'II remember this one, won't we?

We'II remember
when we were a bit mad.

You have to be a bit mad sometimes...

...otherwise it isn't possibIe...

...and I do so want it to be possibIe,
just once.

HoId me.

Come on, mate, wake up. We're Iate.

Come on. You've onIy got
about a quarter of an hour.

- What?
- The interview.

We're supposed to be there at ten.
It's quarter past nine now.

- Oh, my God.
- Look, I teII you what.

I'II go and get you some toast
and you can eat it on the way.

Oh, and don't cut yourseIf shaving.

- They don't empIoy bIeeders.
- (Bruce) 'George!'

- HaIIo.
- George! Sorry I'm Iate.

Can you do us a favour?
Give a message to Miss Mathews.

- TeII her I'II phone her.
- OK, Ieave it to me.

- Come on, come on.
- Don't forget, wiII you, George?

Oh, she'II get the message. I'II do it now.

(Birds tweet)

Where is she?

She wasn't very weII at Iunch time.

I've had her taken to hospitaI.

- What are you taIking about?
- Just a precaution.

What kind of precaution?

(Matron) Just to be on the safe side.

- WouId you Iike a cup of tea?
- No, thanks.

(Mrs Mathews sobs)

(Sobs)

We've just refused some, actuaIIy.

Oh. WeII, have them
now I've brought them.

She's dead, isn't she?

Yes, Mr Pritchard. I'm afraid
there was nothing we couId do.

You see, sometimes peopIe
in her condition catch these viruses

and they can't resist them Iike...

weII, er...Iike most peopIe.

She didn't suffer at aII.
It was aII very quick.

I'm very sorry.

I've pissed myseIf.

Don't worry. It's nothing.

- AII over my chair.
- It doesn't matter.

It does matter.

Everything matters.

If I don't beIieve that, I've had it.

(BaII bounces)