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1
00:00:13,501 --> 00:00:14,621
All right?
2
00:00:15,421 --> 00:00:17,261
Yeah. You?
3
00:00:17,341 --> 00:00:18,181
Yeah.
4
00:00:19,581 --> 00:00:21,061
Do you want some toa-- Oh.
5
00:00:21,861 --> 00:00:23,061
-So?
-[Tony] What?
6
00:00:23,981 --> 00:00:25,461
Ask me about the date!
7
00:00:25,541 --> 00:00:27,301
Oh, right. Good?
8
00:00:28,261 --> 00:00:31,981
-Yeah. He's, uh... He's funny, isn't he?
-Definitely.
9
00:00:33,221 --> 00:00:34,901
Sort of... rough and...
10
00:00:35,661 --> 00:00:36,501
rugged?
11
00:00:36,821 --> 00:00:38,741
[sighs] Like he lives under a bridge.
12
00:00:39,301 --> 00:00:40,501
[doorbell rings]
13
00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:47,981
-All right?
-[Tony] Yeah.
14
00:00:48,061 --> 00:00:49,181
Is Roxy in there?
15
00:00:49,661 --> 00:00:52,461
-Yeah, why?
-Well, I've just popped round to see her.
16
00:00:52,861 --> 00:00:55,061
Surely you've popped round
to deliver my mail?
17
00:00:55,501 --> 00:00:57,341
You haven't got any mail.
Can I come in, then?
18
00:00:57,421 --> 00:00:58,421
It's like a zombie movie.
19
00:00:58,501 --> 00:01:00,701
You're always just outside the house
trying to get in.
20
00:01:00,781 --> 00:01:02,141
[Pat] Don't be antisocial.
21
00:01:11,701 --> 00:01:14,101
-Can I have that last bit of toast?
-Yeah.
22
00:01:14,301 --> 00:01:15,581
Ah. Cheers, babe.
23
00:01:15,661 --> 00:01:17,781
-Do you want something on it?
-No, you're all right.
24
00:01:17,861 --> 00:01:19,741
-Got any peanut butter?
-No.
25
00:01:19,821 --> 00:01:22,461
-Don't worry about it, honestly.
-Sure? I'll pop out and...
26
00:01:22,981 --> 00:01:24,581
-Honestly, don't worry.
-All right, good.
27
00:01:24,661 --> 00:01:25,661
[doorbell rings]
28
00:01:26,581 --> 00:01:30,181
Oh! I didn't tell you, did I?
Sue Fyers at work got fired.
29
00:01:30,261 --> 00:01:31,261
[Roxy] What for?
30
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:32,341
Flashing.
31
00:01:33,221 --> 00:01:34,461
-Front or back?
-[door closes]
32
00:01:34,541 --> 00:01:36,661
Dunno, but the union's involved.
I'm staying out of it.
33
00:01:36,741 --> 00:01:40,061
-Right, I've got to go.
-All right. See you later, mate.
34
00:01:40,141 --> 00:01:41,301
Get out!
35
00:01:41,861 --> 00:01:43,861
-Eh?
-[Tony] What is it?
36
00:01:43,941 --> 00:01:46,421
A woman suing a doctor
for a botched surgery.
37
00:01:46,501 --> 00:01:49,021
-[Tony] Right.
-Someone blows hot and cold, don't they?
38
00:01:49,501 --> 00:01:51,861
Could've done with an egg,
but forget about it.
39
00:01:52,581 --> 00:01:54,661
What happened to you last night?
You bailed early.
40
00:01:54,741 --> 00:01:56,501
Yeah, sorry. Um...
41
00:01:56,821 --> 00:01:58,101
What time did you get home?
42
00:01:58,661 --> 00:02:00,021
Uh... About ten.
43
00:02:00,101 --> 00:02:01,101
I got in at four.
44
00:02:01,701 --> 00:02:03,021
Completely smashed.
45
00:02:03,581 --> 00:02:05,501
Covered in kebab and fanny juice.
46
00:02:06,261 --> 00:02:07,221
Don't ask me how.
47
00:02:07,781 --> 00:02:08,741
I wasn't gonna.
48
00:02:08,821 --> 00:02:11,581
Did too much chang,
so I was lying in bed doing the luge...
49
00:02:11,661 --> 00:02:15,021
till the alarm went off,
then, boom, shower! Coffee.
50
00:02:15,101 --> 00:02:17,901
Suit straight down the dry cleaners. Work.
51
00:02:20,461 --> 00:02:22,221
I got home and I cried a little bit.
52
00:02:22,621 --> 00:02:24,981
Dry cleaners are used to it.
I've shat myself twice.
53
00:02:26,301 --> 00:02:28,141
[clicks tongue] Right. Um...
54
00:02:28,861 --> 00:02:31,501
-Just, sorry, to go back to... me.
-[therapist sighs]
55
00:02:32,341 --> 00:02:33,341
I, um...
56
00:02:33,981 --> 00:02:37,221
I think that I was crying
because I don't want to give up on her,
57
00:02:37,301 --> 00:02:41,901
you know, I don't want to give up on us.
And... all I want to do is
58
00:02:41,981 --> 00:02:44,341
just... talk to her and beg her
59
00:02:44,421 --> 00:02:46,341
to let us go back to how it was.
60
00:02:46,421 --> 00:02:48,901
-Matt--
-But I don't want to stifle her. I don't--
61
00:02:48,981 --> 00:02:50,781
-Women don't want this.
-Yeah.
62
00:02:50,861 --> 00:02:52,621
OK? It's pathetic.
63
00:02:53,581 --> 00:02:54,461
Begging.
64
00:02:55,061 --> 00:02:57,421
[scoffs] How is that good for a family?
65
00:02:59,581 --> 00:03:03,221
Females choose mates
based on their strength.
66
00:03:03,781 --> 00:03:05,501
OK? On their power.
67
00:03:06,701 --> 00:03:08,421
Their capabilities to provide...
68
00:03:09,221 --> 00:03:10,381
and keep them safe.
69
00:03:12,261 --> 00:03:14,701
We're descended
from fucking cavemen, Matt.
70
00:03:16,061 --> 00:03:18,181
We go out,
we kill a saber-toothed tiger,
71
00:03:18,261 --> 00:03:19,621
we bring it back, we share it out,
72
00:03:19,701 --> 00:03:22,221
and then we give the fittest bird
a good fucking seeing to.
73
00:03:23,221 --> 00:03:24,501
That's where we're from.
74
00:03:26,261 --> 00:03:29,141
Yeah, I just don't think
that's really... me.
75
00:03:29,221 --> 00:03:30,261
No, it's not.
76
00:03:32,101 --> 00:03:33,181
Being you
77
00:03:33,261 --> 00:03:36,141
will not win her back.
It's as simple as that.
78
00:03:36,221 --> 00:03:38,221
-You've tried that, didn't work.
-Yeah. No.
79
00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:39,661
She thinks you're a loser.
80
00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:40,581
Solution?
81
00:03:42,421 --> 00:03:44,541
Be something fucking better!
82
00:03:44,621 --> 00:03:46,301
Be something fucking stronger.
83
00:03:46,701 --> 00:03:47,661
-Yeah?
-Mm.
84
00:03:47,741 --> 00:03:48,661
Lie.
85
00:03:49,221 --> 00:03:50,061
Cheat.
86
00:03:50,861 --> 00:03:51,941
Just be a man.
87
00:03:54,461 --> 00:03:55,461
But not you.
88
00:03:56,381 --> 00:03:58,861
When did you start...
having all this done?
89
00:03:59,741 --> 00:04:01,221
[woman] 'Bout five years ago.
90
00:04:01,861 --> 00:04:04,381
Started on, like, botox...
91
00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:07,381
and, like, filler for wrinkles an' that.
92
00:04:08,621 --> 00:04:09,861
[Tony] How old were you?
93
00:04:10,261 --> 00:04:11,501
Early 20s.
94
00:04:12,701 --> 00:04:14,141
What wrinkles did you have?
95
00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:15,221
[woman groans]
96
00:04:15,301 --> 00:04:17,861
Dunno, like, frown lines an' that.
97
00:04:19,821 --> 00:04:22,061
-Right.
-[woman] Yeah, then I proper got into it.
98
00:04:22,141 --> 00:04:23,541
I just couldn't get enough.
99
00:04:24,021 --> 00:04:25,621
And then I got my lips done,
100
00:04:25,701 --> 00:04:27,581
and I had a bit of a reaction.
101
00:04:27,661 --> 00:04:29,661
But that settled down in the end.
102
00:04:29,741 --> 00:04:32,381
And then I wanted to go bigger,
then this happened.
103
00:04:33,221 --> 00:04:36,501
My whole face was paralyzed.
It's only just gone back to normal.
104
00:04:37,141 --> 00:04:38,901
-Has it?
-Yeah.
105
00:04:38,981 --> 00:04:40,101
My boobs leak.
106
00:04:41,501 --> 00:04:42,741
They're fake an' all.
107
00:04:43,181 --> 00:04:44,501
-Are they?
-[woman] Yeah.
108
00:04:44,581 --> 00:04:46,261
-I mean, rock hard.
-[dull tapping]
109
00:04:46,701 --> 00:04:48,341
-Right.
-[woman sighs]
110
00:04:48,821 --> 00:04:49,661
Yeah.
111
00:04:50,101 --> 00:04:53,781
Sorry, and that was the same guy...
that did your face?
112
00:04:53,861 --> 00:04:56,021
Yeah. I was furious.
113
00:04:56,101 --> 00:04:58,061
-Still am.
-[Tony] Are you?
114
00:04:58,901 --> 00:04:59,901
It's hard to tell.
115
00:04:59,981 --> 00:05:02,261
[woman] If you think
he botched my face and chest,
116
00:05:02,341 --> 00:05:03,701
you should see my minge.
117
00:05:04,861 --> 00:05:06,341
It's like a butcher's bin.
118
00:05:08,661 --> 00:05:09,581
Sorry,
119
00:05:10,021 --> 00:05:12,061
you went back to him to have your...
120
00:05:12,501 --> 00:05:14,541
-Minge.
-Yeah, I know. I didn't want to say the...
121
00:05:14,621 --> 00:05:18,101
Yeah, he did it for half price, though.
'Cause of how he'd ruined my face.
122
00:05:18,181 --> 00:05:19,021
[Tony] Right.
123
00:05:20,581 --> 00:05:22,501
Why would you want to have that done?
124
00:05:26,501 --> 00:05:27,861
I think I've got a problem.
125
00:05:29,381 --> 00:05:30,261
Yeah.
126
00:05:30,781 --> 00:05:31,901
I mean, it might be...
127
00:05:32,821 --> 00:05:34,021
like an addiction.
128
00:05:35,021 --> 00:05:38,581
-What, do you mean, like, I can't help it?
-[Tony] Well, I guess so,
129
00:05:38,661 --> 00:05:42,181
but... I mean, if you acknowledge it,
there's a chance you can...
130
00:05:42,821 --> 00:05:44,501
get... you know, get help.
131
00:05:44,581 --> 00:05:46,781
-Do you think I'm mental?
-Well... [sighs]
132
00:05:47,101 --> 00:05:48,421
No more than the rest of us.
133
00:05:49,741 --> 00:05:52,821
As I say, we're all screwed up
in one way or another.
134
00:05:52,901 --> 00:05:54,381
It sort of makes you normal.
135
00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:56,021
[strangled wail]
136
00:05:56,101 --> 00:05:57,261
[chuckles wryly]
137
00:05:57,341 --> 00:05:58,741
-Are you laughing?
-No.
138
00:05:58,821 --> 00:05:59,741
[Tony] Crying?
139
00:06:00,141 --> 00:06:01,021
-Oh.
-[Tony] Oh...
140
00:06:01,101 --> 00:06:01,941
Um...
141
00:06:02,501 --> 00:06:04,301
No, they've fucked my tear ducts.
142
00:06:06,421 --> 00:06:08,501
-[sighs] Take a picture.
-Yeah.
143
00:06:08,901 --> 00:06:10,101
[woman sniffs, clears throat]
144
00:06:11,461 --> 00:06:12,421
[camera clicks]
145
00:06:12,501 --> 00:06:14,421
-[woman] Got it?
-[Lenny] Yeah. Great.
146
00:06:19,261 --> 00:06:20,501
-Hiya.
-[Matt] Hey.
147
00:06:22,621 --> 00:06:24,901
Are you going
to that am-dram cabaret thing?
148
00:06:26,221 --> 00:06:27,461
I dunno. Why?
149
00:06:28,021 --> 00:06:30,421
Well... wondered if you'd like
to come with me?
150
00:06:31,541 --> 00:06:33,941
-What do you mean? You mean you're going?
-[Kath] Yeah.
151
00:06:34,021 --> 00:06:36,821
Thought we could have a drink before
and sit together.
152
00:06:38,781 --> 00:06:40,501
Right. I'm not sure if I'm going.
153
00:06:40,861 --> 00:06:43,181
Right. Well, would you like to go...
154
00:06:44,101 --> 00:06:45,061
with me?
155
00:06:46,261 --> 00:06:48,981
Well, with everyone, really.
Everyone's going. We'd all be there.
156
00:06:49,061 --> 00:06:51,301
Yeah, but I'm saying
would you like to sit with me?
157
00:06:52,301 --> 00:06:54,221
But I don't know if I'm going.
And we don't know
158
00:06:54,301 --> 00:06:55,981
-what seats will be free.
-If you don't want
159
00:06:56,061 --> 00:06:57,781
-to go with me, just say.
-No, it's not that.
160
00:06:57,861 --> 00:07:00,541
-I haven't even checked my diary.
-Well, go on, then.
161
00:07:00,621 --> 00:07:02,661
-What?
-Well, check it. It's right there.
162
00:07:03,941 --> 00:07:06,501
Oh, no.
It's hardly on the right page, is it?
163
00:07:11,701 --> 00:07:16,061
-There's nothing in there at the moment.
-Yeah. Right. Well, I'll, uh...
164
00:07:17,301 --> 00:07:18,661
pencil that in, then.
165
00:07:19,941 --> 00:07:22,381
Um, I will have to check my master diary
as well.
166
00:07:22,461 --> 00:07:24,501
-You've got a master diary?
-Yeah.
167
00:07:24,581 --> 00:07:27,181
I've got work here,
and then personal at home,
168
00:07:27,261 --> 00:07:30,821
so I tend to mix and match,
actually, so... Tony?
169
00:07:30,901 --> 00:07:33,021
Can I just... Sorry, Kath, I've got...
170
00:07:33,101 --> 00:07:34,581
Tony, we've got our, um...
171
00:07:36,061 --> 00:07:36,941
meeting.
172
00:07:39,581 --> 00:07:41,061
Um... Shut the door.
173
00:07:46,181 --> 00:07:48,461
Kath just asked me to sit next to her
at the cabaret thing.
174
00:07:48,541 --> 00:07:49,541
Great.
175
00:07:49,621 --> 00:07:51,341
-I need to get out of it.
-Why?
176
00:07:51,421 --> 00:07:53,941
-Please help me get out of it. Please.
-How?
177
00:07:54,501 --> 00:07:56,301
Say you're thinking
of killing yourself again.
178
00:07:57,421 --> 00:07:59,981
Say I'm thinking
of killing myself next Thursday?
179
00:08:00,061 --> 00:08:01,421
Well, I'll tell her, then.
180
00:08:01,501 --> 00:08:05,261
You'll tell her you can't go with her
'cause I'm thinking of killing myself?
181
00:08:06,021 --> 00:08:07,741
I'm not saying
I'm thinking of killing myself
182
00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:10,421
'cause you're too chicken to say
you don't want to go on a date.
183
00:08:10,501 --> 00:08:12,421
[sighs] For fuck's sake,
it's just a favor.
184
00:08:12,501 --> 00:08:14,581
And do you know the fable,
The Boy Who Cried Wolf?
185
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,221
-Yeah.
-Yeah. Right.
186
00:08:16,301 --> 00:08:18,861
So, what happens when
I really am thinking of killing myself,
187
00:08:18,941 --> 00:08:22,381
and everyone goes, "Nah, he's just trying
to get his cowardly brother-in-law
188
00:08:22,461 --> 00:08:23,501
out of a date"?
189
00:08:24,221 --> 00:08:27,181
Well, no, that's different in that case,
isn't it?
190
00:08:27,261 --> 00:08:29,661
'Cause he admitted it.
He was like, "Nah, only joking."
191
00:08:29,741 --> 00:08:31,101
So they all knew he was lying.
192
00:08:31,181 --> 00:08:33,141
And he kept doing it, so it was obvious.
193
00:08:33,221 --> 00:08:35,501
We'll only use this lie once,
and we'll never admit to it.
194
00:08:35,581 --> 00:08:40,181
So, the moral of that fable is:
"Never admit you were lying,
195
00:08:40,261 --> 00:08:41,341
-ever..."
-Yeah.
196
00:08:41,421 --> 00:08:44,941
"...and always use different lies
each time"?
197
00:08:45,541 --> 00:08:46,461
Yeah.
198
00:08:46,541 --> 00:08:47,781
Nice message.
199
00:08:47,861 --> 00:08:48,821
-No.
-Come on.
200
00:08:48,901 --> 00:08:49,741
No.
201
00:08:50,061 --> 00:08:51,741
-Fuck's sake.
-You're on your own.
202
00:08:52,941 --> 00:08:53,981
[door closes]
203
00:08:54,061 --> 00:08:56,061
[sentimental music plays]
204
00:09:03,301 --> 00:09:05,101
[birds chirping]
205
00:09:28,781 --> 00:09:30,061
[Tony] There we go, Dad.
206
00:09:33,221 --> 00:09:34,101
Good.
207
00:09:34,181 --> 00:09:35,421
There. You're all right.
208
00:09:36,381 --> 00:09:38,221
-Hi.
-Hiya.
209
00:09:38,301 --> 00:09:40,141
[Tony's dad breathes out heavily]
210
00:09:42,221 --> 00:09:45,061
Tony, I'm not going to sit around
and wait for you to make a move,
211
00:09:45,141 --> 00:09:46,421
I have to get on with my life.
212
00:09:47,701 --> 00:09:50,101
-Why are you acting weird?
-I'm acting weird?
213
00:09:50,181 --> 00:09:51,581
For fuck's sake, Tony!
214
00:09:51,661 --> 00:09:53,421
I'm just a bit fed up, all right?
215
00:09:53,501 --> 00:09:56,061
-My wife died. My dad--
-Yes, I know.
216
00:09:56,141 --> 00:09:57,621
Oh, sorry if that bores you.
217
00:09:57,701 --> 00:09:59,941
Seriously? Fucking hell.
218
00:10:01,141 --> 00:10:02,221
Was it just a drink?
219
00:10:03,101 --> 00:10:03,941
Fuck's sake.
220
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:06,061
It's just a question. Was it just a drink?
221
00:10:06,141 --> 00:10:08,381
[exasperated] Yes, it was just a drink!
222
00:10:09,061 --> 00:10:10,701
OK. Good.
223
00:10:12,021 --> 00:10:13,221
[plumps pillow]
224
00:10:13,301 --> 00:10:15,661
But it might not always be
just a drink, though.
225
00:10:23,861 --> 00:10:25,581
Dad, say, "Simon is a cunt."
226
00:10:27,221 --> 00:10:28,061
What?
227
00:10:29,501 --> 00:10:30,741
"Simon is a cunt."
228
00:10:32,661 --> 00:10:33,501
Say it.
229
00:10:35,141 --> 00:10:37,101
-Yeah.
-"Simon is a cunt."
230
00:10:38,741 --> 00:10:39,741
Remember that.
231
00:10:42,021 --> 00:10:42,941
Right.
232
00:10:43,381 --> 00:10:45,381
[wistful instrumental music plays]
233
00:10:46,101 --> 00:10:47,061
[nurse] All right?
234
00:10:47,941 --> 00:10:50,381
-Is it OK? Not too hot?
-[woman] No, it's good.
235
00:10:50,461 --> 00:10:52,301
[nurse] Yeah. Manage another one?
236
00:10:53,541 --> 00:10:56,261
You'll feel so much better
if you eat this. That's it.
237
00:10:58,501 --> 00:11:00,741
-[indistinct chatter]
-[spoon clinking]
238
00:11:01,941 --> 00:11:03,661
That's better, eh? OK?
239
00:11:03,741 --> 00:11:04,901
-Yeah.
-Yeah?
240
00:11:07,981 --> 00:11:08,861
Hi.
241
00:11:09,381 --> 00:11:11,501
-Hi.
-I've brought you a few jumpers.
242
00:11:11,581 --> 00:11:14,701
-It's getting a bit chillier outside.
-Great. Thanks.
243
00:11:14,781 --> 00:11:18,181
[chuckles lightly] I mean, yeah,
can never have too many jumpers.
244
00:11:18,261 --> 00:11:20,581
Um... I was gonna call you, actually.
245
00:11:20,661 --> 00:11:22,181
Um, you know the cabaret thing
246
00:11:22,261 --> 00:11:23,621
-that they're doing?
-Yeah.
247
00:11:24,581 --> 00:11:26,101
I wondered if you wanted to come.
248
00:11:26,621 --> 00:11:28,661
I'd have to sort a babysitter.
249
00:11:28,741 --> 00:11:30,621
No, you can bring George.
It's for everyone.
250
00:11:31,221 --> 00:11:32,901
Oh... I'm not sure.
251
00:11:33,541 --> 00:11:36,341
Yeah. Um...
You'd be doing me a favor, actually.
252
00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:39,021
-Kath's asked me to go with her.
-Why?
253
00:11:40,301 --> 00:11:41,981
I think she's got a thing for me.
254
00:11:42,061 --> 00:11:43,381
Well, tell her you can't
255
00:11:43,461 --> 00:11:45,421
'cause you're going
with your wife and child.
256
00:11:46,421 --> 00:11:47,621
Right. Yeah.
257
00:11:49,181 --> 00:11:51,661
-Uh...
-I mean, it's nice of her, though, really,
258
00:11:51,741 --> 00:11:53,861
'cause she probably thought
you were lonely.
259
00:11:53,941 --> 00:11:55,261
-Probably.
-Yeah.
260
00:11:55,341 --> 00:11:56,861
I was thinking of coming,
261
00:11:56,941 --> 00:11:59,101
I just didn't know
whether George would be allowed.
262
00:11:59,181 --> 00:12:01,141
-He is, yeah.
-That's good, yeah.
263
00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,221
-OK, well... I'd better go.
-Yeah.
264
00:12:04,301 --> 00:12:06,981
-Thanks for the...
-Um, but I'll see you later.
265
00:12:08,381 --> 00:12:10,101
[gentle instrumental music plays]
266
00:12:12,581 --> 00:12:14,741
-Hi. You all right? Yeah, good.
-[Jill] You all right?
267
00:12:18,301 --> 00:12:19,301
[Tony] All right?
268
00:12:24,021 --> 00:12:28,101
-Um... Kath, about the, um, cabaret thing.
-Yeah?
269
00:12:29,141 --> 00:12:30,941
I'm gonna go with Jill and George.
270
00:12:32,341 --> 00:12:34,501
Yeah, fine. Brilliant.
271
00:12:35,701 --> 00:12:36,541
[Kath] Great.
272
00:12:39,661 --> 00:12:42,701
-I'm killing myself that night!
-Don't... [sighs heavily]
273
00:12:44,861 --> 00:12:45,701
What?
274
00:12:46,781 --> 00:12:48,821
Oh. Nothing, it was a...
275
00:12:48,901 --> 00:12:49,741
Weird!
276
00:12:52,181 --> 00:12:54,301
[wistful instrumental music plays]
277
00:12:57,341 --> 00:12:58,421
Do you want a coffee?
278
00:13:00,541 --> 00:13:01,381
Why?
279
00:13:01,901 --> 00:13:02,781
Why?
280
00:13:04,101 --> 00:13:05,821
Dunno, 'cause it tastes nice?
281
00:13:08,141 --> 00:13:10,261
Come on,
let's go for a nice coffee, and...
282
00:13:10,341 --> 00:13:13,341
talk about really interesting things
like... advertising.
283
00:13:13,901 --> 00:13:15,461
-Yeah?
-Yeah, all right.
284
00:13:18,661 --> 00:13:19,941
[footsteps recede]
285
00:13:28,941 --> 00:13:30,381
-There you go.
-Thanks.
286
00:13:31,821 --> 00:13:33,261
[Tony sighs tiredly]
287
00:13:35,141 --> 00:13:37,301
Did I embarrass myself with Matt, then?
288
00:13:37,381 --> 00:13:38,381
Definitely not.
289
00:13:38,941 --> 00:13:41,301
Why would you be embarrassed
about being honest
290
00:13:41,381 --> 00:13:43,421
and saying something nice?
He should be flattered.
291
00:13:43,501 --> 00:13:44,741
I think he was scared!
292
00:13:45,501 --> 00:13:47,781
[chuckles sadly]
I'm obviously not his type.
293
00:13:48,741 --> 00:13:50,341
Someone just got there first.
294
00:13:50,421 --> 00:13:52,981
But, um... you didn't do anything wrong.
295
00:13:53,061 --> 00:13:54,381
You showed your feelings.
296
00:13:55,061 --> 00:13:56,061
That's good.
297
00:13:56,901 --> 00:13:58,621
I wish I'd shown my feelings more.
298
00:13:59,381 --> 00:14:01,021
With Lisa. Um...
299
00:14:01,661 --> 00:14:02,501
I...
300
00:14:03,741 --> 00:14:06,701
Sometimes, I'd be embarrassed
to hold hands in public.
301
00:14:07,621 --> 00:14:10,501
Or if we were on the phone
and there was people around,
302
00:14:10,901 --> 00:14:13,181
she'd always say, "Bye. Love you."
303
00:14:13,261 --> 00:14:15,221
And I would go, "Me too."
304
00:14:15,301 --> 00:14:17,221
And she'd laugh, 'cause she'd know.
305
00:14:18,061 --> 00:14:18,901
Yeah.
306
00:14:19,461 --> 00:14:21,141
Sometimes, I was out, working late.
307
00:14:21,221 --> 00:14:23,621
The phone would go, and I'd think,
"Oh, God, what's happened?"
308
00:14:23,701 --> 00:14:26,541
And I'd go, "Hello?"
I'd go, "What's wrong?" And, um...
309
00:14:27,821 --> 00:14:30,181
she'd say,
"Nothing's wrong, I just love you."
310
00:14:30,261 --> 00:14:31,501
[chokes back sobs]
311
00:14:35,621 --> 00:14:38,581
So... And one day,
you'll meet someone, and it'll be...
312
00:14:39,261 --> 00:14:40,501
Life will be brilliant.
313
00:14:41,181 --> 00:14:42,021
So, uh...
314
00:14:43,461 --> 00:14:46,461
Nothing to feel sad about. Not yet.
[strangled giggle]
315
00:14:48,941 --> 00:14:50,941
[mournful instrumental music plays]
316
00:14:56,981 --> 00:14:58,981
I'm going to... walk for...
317
00:14:59,821 --> 00:15:00,821
OK.
318
00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,581
-Thanks for the coffee.
-Sure.
319
00:15:02,661 --> 00:15:06,301
Oh, and thanks for telling me that thing
about your wife calling you.
320
00:15:06,381 --> 00:15:07,381
It was lovely.
321
00:15:08,381 --> 00:15:09,981
-See you later.
-See you later.
322
00:15:49,061 --> 00:15:50,461
[Tony] Bad day, I'm afraid.
323
00:15:54,861 --> 00:15:57,261
The last thing you should do
is drink alone.
324
00:16:01,261 --> 00:16:02,301
[Tony chuckles]
325
00:16:04,021 --> 00:16:04,861
Mm...
326
00:16:06,221 --> 00:16:07,061
Nice.
327
00:16:08,221 --> 00:16:10,221
[Tony] Lisa was my greatest achievement.
328
00:16:11,381 --> 00:16:14,861
I've never done anything else, really.
Not of worth.
329
00:16:16,661 --> 00:16:18,181
Nothing else to be proud of.
330
00:16:20,061 --> 00:16:21,061
Just that.
331
00:16:22,661 --> 00:16:23,701
I won at life.
332
00:16:25,941 --> 00:16:26,941
You did.
333
00:16:30,221 --> 00:16:33,301
I'm not as good as her,
and I'm proud of that. [chuckles]
334
00:16:33,901 --> 00:16:35,061
You're just different.
335
00:16:36,741 --> 00:16:39,381
I'm angry. I'm petty. I'm sad.
336
00:16:39,461 --> 00:16:42,341
I'm jealous of anyone
who's still got someone.
337
00:16:45,581 --> 00:16:47,941
How did you get Lisa if you were so bad?
338
00:16:49,741 --> 00:16:50,741
I'm not sure.
339
00:16:52,861 --> 00:16:54,461
I was just nice to her, I think.
340
00:16:54,941 --> 00:16:56,461
You should try that again.
341
00:16:56,541 --> 00:16:57,741
[both chuckle]
342
00:17:00,501 --> 00:17:01,661
I miss her so much.
343
00:17:02,941 --> 00:17:04,421
I feel sad all the time.
344
00:17:06,101 --> 00:17:07,421
I'm not the person I was.
345
00:17:08,541 --> 00:17:10,261
Lisa dying, I just... It's like...
346
00:17:11,581 --> 00:17:14,701
I lost most of me, and all the good stuff,
all the happiness...
347
00:17:15,301 --> 00:17:16,501
any joy in anything...
348
00:17:19,781 --> 00:17:21,621
I feel like I'm nothing, you know?
349
00:17:21,701 --> 00:17:22,981
That's not true.
350
00:17:23,061 --> 00:17:25,661
People think that I'm sort of OK,
you know,
351
00:17:25,741 --> 00:17:27,781
like I'm getting on with it,
I'm snarky now and again,
352
00:17:27,861 --> 00:17:30,141
and that this is a lapse,
but it's not.
353
00:17:30,821 --> 00:17:32,261
This is me all the time now.
354
00:17:34,221 --> 00:17:36,381
Everything else is the front, you know?
355
00:17:37,181 --> 00:17:38,541
I'm not well, but I remember
356
00:17:38,621 --> 00:17:41,061
what it was like to be normal,
so I do an impression of that.
357
00:17:42,941 --> 00:17:44,981
But this is what I really am.
358
00:17:45,061 --> 00:17:47,181
And I want to be normal again...
[sniffles]
359
00:17:47,261 --> 00:17:48,781
...but I'm weak, you know?
360
00:17:50,701 --> 00:17:53,421
When Lisa was dying,
I tried to be brave and put a...
361
00:17:54,101 --> 00:17:56,101
you know, a face on, to be positive,
362
00:17:56,701 --> 00:18:00,181
and even then, I'd break down sometimes,
and she'd... [voice cracks]
363
00:18:01,621 --> 00:18:02,861
...have to comfort me.
364
00:18:04,261 --> 00:18:07,901
I couldn't even give her that.
When she was dying, she was still on duty.
365
00:18:08,461 --> 00:18:09,581
Looking after me.
366
00:18:11,741 --> 00:18:12,901
She'd have loved that.
367
00:18:12,981 --> 00:18:13,821
[sniffles]
368
00:18:16,181 --> 00:18:17,341
[sobbing] I don't know.
369
00:18:17,821 --> 00:18:18,781
I do.
370
00:18:21,381 --> 00:18:22,781
'Cause I'm a woman too.
371
00:18:24,261 --> 00:18:26,461
-[Tony sniffles]
-And it's better to be needed.
372
00:18:27,661 --> 00:18:29,101
[sobs, sighs]
373
00:18:34,821 --> 00:18:35,981
[Tony sobs gently]
374
00:18:39,341 --> 00:18:40,421
[Lisa] Be strong.
375
00:18:41,341 --> 00:18:43,901
Everybody's struggling.It's not always their fault.
376
00:18:45,661 --> 00:18:48,221
There's a porter herewith a bit of a BO problem.
377
00:18:49,221 --> 00:18:52,741
I'm quite glad you haven't bumpedinto him, to be honest. He stinks.
378
00:18:52,821 --> 00:18:53,821
[inhales deeply]
379
00:18:53,901 --> 00:18:55,021
And do you know why?
380
00:18:56,061 --> 00:18:58,621
'Cause he's working twice as hardas everyone else.
381
00:18:58,701 --> 00:19:01,461
He's always running around doing stufffor other people.
382
00:19:01,541 --> 00:19:02,701
He's got no idea.
383
00:19:03,901 --> 00:19:07,141
And I was going to say something,but do you know what came out?
384
00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,661
"Thank you for working so hard."
385
00:19:10,581 --> 00:19:11,821
And he nearly cried.
386
00:19:13,421 --> 00:19:16,581
[sighs] Just tell peopleyou appreciate 'em now and then, yeah?
387
00:19:33,101 --> 00:19:35,781
-[Tony] Hi, sorry. Um...
-Oh, hello.
388
00:19:35,861 --> 00:19:37,261
-Can I...? Um...
-Yeah.
389
00:19:37,661 --> 00:19:40,581
-Is it Tony?
-Yeah. Hi. Um...
390
00:19:42,101 --> 00:19:43,381
Has anyone asked you...
391
00:19:43,861 --> 00:19:46,621
not to close the paper
and sell the building?
392
00:19:48,021 --> 00:19:48,861
No.
393
00:19:49,661 --> 00:19:51,141
Right. Um...
394
00:19:52,141 --> 00:19:53,141
Please don't.
395
00:19:54,181 --> 00:19:56,141
A lot of people rely on it. And, um...
396
00:19:57,061 --> 00:19:59,781
I mean, how much will you make
from selling it?
397
00:20:00,901 --> 00:20:01,901
Half a million.
398
00:20:04,061 --> 00:20:05,621
Right... Yeah.
399
00:20:07,461 --> 00:20:08,461
That's a lot.
400
00:20:08,781 --> 00:20:09,621
Mm.
401
00:20:11,101 --> 00:20:12,581
What will you do with that?
402
00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:15,821
New car, maybe.
403
00:20:17,741 --> 00:20:19,701
Ah... I dunno, um...
404
00:20:20,941 --> 00:20:22,021
Potter around a bit.
405
00:20:23,341 --> 00:20:25,461
No, it's just that, you know, if, um...
406
00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:29,061
if I don't cash in my chips soon,
you know, none of my...
407
00:20:29,581 --> 00:20:31,461
I might kick the bucket,
then it'd be too late.
408
00:20:32,581 --> 00:20:35,661
I mean, it's not as if I need anything
as such, it's, uh...
409
00:20:36,261 --> 00:20:37,621
Although... [chuckles lightly]
410
00:20:38,981 --> 00:20:42,181
...I wouldn't say no
to the company of a nice lady.
411
00:20:42,261 --> 00:20:43,261
[chuckles]
412
00:20:45,661 --> 00:20:46,941
That's all that matters.
413
00:20:48,661 --> 00:20:51,021
I had the best marriage imaginable.
414
00:20:52,021 --> 00:20:52,861
Magical.
415
00:20:53,501 --> 00:20:54,381
Uh...
416
00:20:54,901 --> 00:20:58,061
So, when, um, Lisa, my wife,
417
00:20:58,141 --> 00:20:59,501
when she died,
418
00:20:59,581 --> 00:21:02,101
I was suicidal, and depressed.
419
00:21:02,181 --> 00:21:05,141
And everyone was so nice,
everyone tried to help me and...
420
00:21:05,221 --> 00:21:09,421
they sort of saved me, so...
I wanted to do something nice back.
421
00:21:10,021 --> 00:21:13,861
But, um, anyway, you're a nice guy,
and I just want you to know,
422
00:21:14,821 --> 00:21:16,781
you know, the whole story, and, uh...
423
00:21:17,741 --> 00:21:20,021
I mean, if you weren't to sell it, um,
424
00:21:20,101 --> 00:21:22,901
we could... you know, give it another go.
425
00:21:23,301 --> 00:21:25,741
If it didn't work out,
you could sell it next year.
426
00:21:26,181 --> 00:21:27,421
It might work, and...
427
00:21:28,021 --> 00:21:31,581
we could do with someone...
who cared about... success,
428
00:21:31,661 --> 00:21:34,141
'cause we are the biggest bunch
of losers you will ever meet.
429
00:21:34,221 --> 00:21:35,541
[laughs]
430
00:21:36,221 --> 00:21:37,061
[Tony] But...
431
00:21:37,141 --> 00:21:39,221
it's a... it's a good bunch.
432
00:21:41,981 --> 00:21:44,101
It might be nice
to have a challenge again.
433
00:21:45,141 --> 00:21:46,021
Cheers.
434
00:21:50,341 --> 00:21:51,181
[James] OK.
435
00:21:51,261 --> 00:21:53,181
♪ Isn't it rich? ♪
436
00:21:53,821 --> 00:21:56,061
♪ Aren't we a pair? ♪
437
00:21:56,141 --> 00:21:58,061
You're not doing the lyrics right.
Start it again.
438
00:21:58,141 --> 00:22:00,021
-Come on.
-[sighs] OK. All right.
439
00:22:00,101 --> 00:22:03,581
Don't think about it, do it.
Sing it like it means something.
440
00:22:03,661 --> 00:22:04,861
♪ Isn't it rich? ♪
441
00:22:04,941 --> 00:22:06,901
[Ken] Start again so I can hear it!
442
00:22:06,981 --> 00:22:09,261
-♪ Isn't it rich? ♪-♪ Isn't it... rich! ♪
443
00:22:09,341 --> 00:22:12,101
-♪ Are... ♪-♪ Aren't we a pair? ♪
444
00:22:12,181 --> 00:22:15,141
-[Ken] No, again. "Isn't it rich?"
-Ken, I can't do it, all right?
445
00:22:15,221 --> 00:22:18,101
Who's gonna be a superstar in a year
if he listens to his director?
446
00:22:18,181 --> 00:22:19,941
-But I can't breathe, Ken.
-You. Do it again.
447
00:22:20,021 --> 00:22:21,461
-I could just dance.
-Sing and dance.
448
00:22:21,541 --> 00:22:23,901
-What are you trying to say?
-Can I do the dance on its own?
449
00:22:23,981 --> 00:22:27,141
-If I did it with just the dance.
-He doesn't work well under pressure.
450
00:22:27,221 --> 00:22:28,301
Ken, stop shouting at him!
451
00:22:28,381 --> 00:22:30,061
-I'm so sorry you had to see that.
-It's OK.
452
00:22:30,141 --> 00:22:32,341
I don't normally lose it like that.
I just...
453
00:22:32,701 --> 00:22:35,301
I'm trying to create the best scenario.
454
00:22:35,381 --> 00:22:36,981
You can do it without the words.
455
00:22:37,061 --> 00:22:38,301
-Thanks, Ken.
-Just the dance.
456
00:22:38,381 --> 00:22:39,861
-Is that what you want to do?
-Yeah.
457
00:22:39,941 --> 00:22:42,901
If that makes you happy,
even if it's shit, and it will be,
458
00:22:42,981 --> 00:22:44,701
I want you to be happy, all right?
459
00:22:44,781 --> 00:22:46,821
-Thanks, Ken.
-This is why we do it. It's all right.
460
00:22:46,901 --> 00:22:49,061
Hey, have I told you
about my sister's anus yet?
461
00:22:49,461 --> 00:22:51,621
-Uh... I don't think so.
-Right, listen up.
462
00:22:52,141 --> 00:22:54,101
Silly cow is only having it bleached.
463
00:22:54,541 --> 00:22:58,021
Bleached! That's a thing now,
bleaching your anus.
464
00:22:58,101 --> 00:23:00,141
-[Sandy] Right.
-[Ken] I said, "For the love of God,
465
00:23:00,221 --> 00:23:02,261
why are you doing that?"
She said, "So it looks nice."
466
00:23:02,341 --> 00:23:04,341
I said, "Fuck me, who's gonna see that?"
467
00:23:04,421 --> 00:23:07,341
More people are going to see mine,
and mine's like a fucking compost heap.
468
00:23:07,421 --> 00:23:09,581
I think we should probably just watch.
469
00:23:09,661 --> 00:23:12,541
-What were you talking about?
-I was telling her about my sister's anus.
470
00:23:12,861 --> 00:23:16,021
I'm fascinated with the anus.
Always have been, always will be.
471
00:23:16,861 --> 00:23:19,381
The man who is tired of the anus
is tired of life.
472
00:23:21,181 --> 00:23:24,261
-You can quote me on that. [chuckles]
-OK, thanks.
473
00:23:25,421 --> 00:23:27,261
How's your material going?
474
00:23:27,341 --> 00:23:28,381
Gonna keep it loose.
475
00:23:28,861 --> 00:23:31,261
I'm sort of
like a performance artist, so...
476
00:23:31,341 --> 00:23:33,221
I can't be constrained in the normal way.
477
00:23:33,301 --> 00:23:35,701
Well, you've got ten minutes,
so you better keep it that tight.
478
00:23:35,781 --> 00:23:38,381
Ten minutes?
I can't do everything in ten minutes.
479
00:23:38,461 --> 00:23:41,381
Oh, fuck this! Sort it out between you.
I'm off for a vape.
480
00:23:41,461 --> 00:23:44,101
[stomping feet]
If you want me, I'll be in the disableds.
481
00:23:44,181 --> 00:23:45,901
[door opens, closes]
482
00:23:51,181 --> 00:23:52,181
You all right?
483
00:23:52,861 --> 00:23:54,101
-Yeah.
-How's it going?
484
00:23:54,661 --> 00:23:57,261
Just got a great scoop
on Ken Otley's sister's anus.
485
00:23:57,341 --> 00:23:59,021
-[sniggers]
-It's bleached.
486
00:23:59,541 --> 00:24:00,861
Good. Well...
487
00:24:01,581 --> 00:24:05,141
you might have to cover these sort
of stories for a little while longer,
488
00:24:05,621 --> 00:24:08,141
'cause Paul's agreed
not to close the paper.
489
00:24:08,821 --> 00:24:09,901
-Really?
-Yeah.
490
00:24:11,301 --> 00:24:12,421
Oh, thank you!
491
00:24:12,501 --> 00:24:13,621
-Don't cry.
-[giggles]
492
00:24:14,021 --> 00:24:15,181
You work so hard.
493
00:24:18,101 --> 00:24:19,101
You're great.
494
00:24:19,741 --> 00:24:21,901
-Thanks.
-All right.
495
00:24:26,301 --> 00:24:27,581
[breathes out shakily]
496
00:24:27,821 --> 00:24:29,181
[upbeat music plays]
497
00:24:33,301 --> 00:24:36,501
[Lisa] Aww! Look at her!Brandy! What's this?
498
00:24:36,581 --> 00:24:39,061
-[Tony] She looks like a... cartoon mouse.-What is this?
499
00:24:39,141 --> 00:24:41,381
-[Tony] I don't...
-[Lisa and Tony cackle]
500
00:24:42,781 --> 00:24:45,141
Get your dildo, Brand.Get your dildo!
501
00:24:45,221 --> 00:24:47,421
[both laugh raucously]
502
00:24:48,061 --> 00:24:49,621
[Lisa] Good girl!
503
00:24:51,061 --> 00:24:54,061
Brandy, say, "Sausages!"
504
00:24:54,901 --> 00:24:58,261
-[Tony laughs]
-♪ Once we were lovers ♪
505
00:25:02,021 --> 00:25:04,901
♪ Can they understand? ♪
506
00:25:08,781 --> 00:25:12,421
♪ Closer than others, I was your ♪
507
00:25:15,341 --> 00:25:17,741
♪ I was your man ♪
508
00:25:22,021 --> 00:25:24,501
♪ Don't talk of heartaches ♪
509
00:25:25,701 --> 00:25:30,341
♪ Oh, I remember them all ♪
510
00:25:34,621 --> 00:25:38,741
♪ When I'm checking you outOne day... ♪
35557
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