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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:29,550 --> 00:00:30,910 Fuck. 2 00:00:32,910 --> 00:00:34,030 Shit! 3 00:00:37,190 --> 00:00:39,489 - Hello? - Hi, Adam. It's Shruti, 4 00:00:39,490 --> 00:00:42,749 one of the SHOs. Sorry to disturb you. 5 00:00:42,750 --> 00:00:45,549 Erm, you're on the rota for labour ward today, 6 00:00:45,550 --> 00:00:48,149 - and Mr Lockhart... - Er, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 7 00:00:48,150 --> 00:00:50,869 Erm, tell him I'm really sorry. 8 00:00:50,870 --> 00:00:53,590 I think there's been an accident. I've been sat here for an hour... 9 00:00:57,430 --> 00:00:58,990 And I'll be there in a minute. 10 00:01:00,710 --> 00:01:02,669 Well, I'm not dead, am I? 11 00:01:02,670 --> 00:01:05,189 Please tell me you haven't ordered a coffin. 12 00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:08,349 Of course I'm not having an affair. I wouldn't have the time. 13 00:01:08,350 --> 00:01:11,869 I just fell asleep last night when I went to the car. 14 00:01:11,870 --> 00:01:14,709 Who did you phone? Please tell me you haven't phoned the police. 15 00:01:14,710 --> 00:01:16,509 Well, who did you phone, then? 16 00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:18,069 Oh, sorry. 17 00:01:18,070 --> 00:01:19,310 Who did you phone, then? 18 00:01:20,510 --> 00:01:22,150 My mum?! 19 00:01:23,590 --> 00:01:26,029 Shit. Are you deranged? 20 00:01:26,030 --> 00:01:28,029 And what did she... ? 21 00:01:30,230 --> 00:01:32,909 Don't go anywhere. I'm going to call you right back. 22 00:01:32,910 --> 00:01:35,069 Is coming out! 23 00:01:35,070 --> 00:01:36,589 Is coming out! 24 00:01:36,590 --> 00:01:39,029 Well, a stroke of luck, you've come to the right place. 25 00:01:39,030 --> 00:01:40,709 Let's get you up to labour ward, shall we? 26 00:01:40,710 --> 00:01:42,509 It's, erm, a bit of a walk, I'm afraid. 27 00:01:43,910 --> 00:01:46,189 Do you mind if I have a quick check? 28 00:01:46,190 --> 00:01:47,989 I'm a doctor. Probably should have said. 29 00:01:47,990 --> 00:01:49,429 I'm Adam. And you are... ? 30 00:01:49,430 --> 00:01:51,269 - Andrea. - Andrea. 31 00:01:54,310 --> 00:01:59,869 OK. OK, Andrea, so, erm, baby's arm 32 00:01:59,870 --> 00:02:02,390 - has come out. - That is normal? 33 00:02:03,510 --> 00:02:06,349 Take a wild guess. Baby is lying sideways. 34 00:02:06,350 --> 00:02:08,949 Do you understand that? Sideways? 35 00:02:08,950 --> 00:02:11,629 - So you need a Caesarean section. - Oh, Caesarean. 36 00:02:11,630 --> 00:02:14,229 I've got a scalpel in my back pocket. You'll be fine. 37 00:02:14,230 --> 00:02:15,589 Shall we go? 38 00:02:15,590 --> 00:02:17,830 - Yeah. - Yeah? That's it. 39 00:02:19,510 --> 00:02:21,589 That's it. You OK? 40 00:02:21,590 --> 00:02:25,029 Erm, Andrea, I know a short cut. Let's go this way. 41 00:02:25,030 --> 00:02:26,749 I don't want to hurry you, Andrea, 42 00:02:26,750 --> 00:02:29,229 but we've got to get going. You're doing brilliantly. 43 00:02:29,230 --> 00:02:31,469 - It's OK. Deep breaths. - Mind yourselves! 44 00:02:31,470 --> 00:02:33,549 Come on, then, quickly. Hurry up. 45 00:02:33,550 --> 00:02:36,229 That's it, we're nearly there. 46 00:02:36,230 --> 00:02:38,189 We're going to go up in the staff lift. 47 00:02:38,190 --> 00:02:39,430 Nearly there, nearly there. 48 00:02:40,750 --> 00:02:43,250 - Come on. - This is lift? 49 00:02:43,251 --> 00:02:44,269 It's safe. Come on. 50 00:02:44,270 --> 00:02:45,715 - Really? - Yeah. You can do it. 51 00:02:45,716 --> 00:02:47,149 - I can't! - Yeah, yeah. 52 00:02:47,150 --> 00:02:48,749 No, wait. Wait, wait. 53 00:02:48,750 --> 00:02:51,269 Wait for it. No, no, no. OK, are you ready? 54 00:02:51,270 --> 00:02:54,069 Three, two, one. 55 00:02:54,070 --> 00:02:56,589 Keep breathing. Nice deep breaths. 56 00:02:56,590 --> 00:02:58,829 When I say so, we're going to jump out of the lift. 57 00:02:58,830 --> 00:03:00,229 Are you a real doctor? 58 00:03:00,230 --> 00:03:01,869 Fair question... 59 00:03:01,870 --> 00:03:04,029 ... though, strangely, one you've asked me 60 00:03:04,030 --> 00:03:05,749 after you showed me your vagina. 61 00:03:05,750 --> 00:03:08,589 Right, there you go. Yes? 62 00:03:08,590 --> 00:03:10,749 OK, so, let's get ready. 63 00:03:10,750 --> 00:03:12,789 Get ready. 64 00:03:12,790 --> 00:03:15,469 And jump! Don't worry, don't worry. 65 00:03:15,470 --> 00:03:18,190 The lift will go round and we'll have another go. 66 00:03:19,430 --> 00:03:22,029 - You're doing really well. - What's happening? 67 00:03:22,030 --> 00:03:23,669 It's just going through the... 68 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,469 ... through the roof bit before it goes down. 69 00:03:26,510 --> 00:03:28,429 All right? It'll be light again soon. 70 00:03:28,430 --> 00:03:30,590 - Something's wrong! Look! - OK. 71 00:03:32,030 --> 00:03:34,269 Jesus Christ. We call this a cord prolapse. 72 00:03:34,270 --> 00:03:36,949 Ideally, it would happen on labour ward, not in a mad lift. 73 00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:39,549 OK, Andrea, everything's going to be fine. 74 00:03:39,550 --> 00:03:41,069 I mean, it might be fine. 75 00:03:41,070 --> 00:03:43,589 If the cord gets cold, then baby stops getting blood. 76 00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:45,549 No more blood, no more baby. 77 00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:48,429 Right, hold it inside. You understand? Inside. 78 00:03:48,430 --> 00:03:50,109 - Yeah. - Come on, come on, come on. 79 00:03:50,110 --> 00:03:52,469 Are you the SHO? Staff lifts now. 80 00:03:52,470 --> 00:03:54,349 Bring a hospital bed and a box of gloves. 81 00:03:54,350 --> 00:03:56,589 Literally now. Cord prolapse. 82 00:03:56,590 --> 00:03:58,909 Right, come on, Andrea, 83 00:03:58,910 --> 00:04:00,389 we need to get off. Get ready. 84 00:04:00,390 --> 00:04:01,520 - And jump! Jump! Jump! - Can't! 85 00:04:01,521 --> 00:04:02,521 Fuck it. 86 00:04:03,110 --> 00:04:04,629 Come on. OK? 87 00:04:07,630 --> 00:04:09,190 Andrea, stay there. 88 00:04:10,430 --> 00:04:12,829 Get her up on the bed. Knee-elbow position, 89 00:04:12,830 --> 00:04:14,629 replace the cord, get her round to theatre. 90 00:04:14,630 --> 00:04:16,829 I'm going to change into some scrubs. You consent her. 91 00:04:16,830 --> 00:04:19,469 - Consent her for... ? - A deep-tissue massage. 92 00:04:19,470 --> 00:04:21,309 It's a cord prolapse! 93 00:04:21,310 --> 00:04:23,549 - Caesarean! - Oh, well, when you say, 94 00:04:23,550 --> 00:04:26,109 "knee-elbow position"... 95 00:04:26,110 --> 00:04:27,469 My mistake, sorry. 96 00:04:27,470 --> 00:04:29,549 Your outfit looks a lot like what the doctors wear. 97 00:04:30,910 --> 00:04:32,189 I'll do this. You push the bed. 98 00:04:32,190 --> 00:04:33,550 Get up on here. That's it. 99 00:04:36,870 --> 00:04:38,349 A bit less Alton Towers. 100 00:04:38,350 --> 00:04:39,989 I'm so sorry. 101 00:04:39,990 --> 00:04:41,589 Why don't I drive? 102 00:04:41,590 --> 00:04:43,069 You go and find the anaesthetist. 103 00:04:43,070 --> 00:04:45,109 That's the doctor that makes you go sleep-sleep. 104 00:04:46,790 --> 00:04:48,109 I've found the husband. 105 00:04:48,110 --> 00:04:49,629 He's just coming up from reception. 106 00:04:49,630 --> 00:04:51,340 OK, Andrea, this is going to be fine. 107 00:04:51,341 --> 00:04:52,470 You'll have a baby in five minutes. 108 00:04:52,570 --> 00:04:55,469 - And is free? - Yep, free. Completely free. 109 00:04:55,470 --> 00:04:57,149 We're not even allowed to accept tips. 110 00:04:58,670 --> 00:05:00,869 Dr Adam, you should see me next. It's really urgent. 111 00:05:00,870 --> 00:05:03,309 - Really? - Erika, darling, can you just take a seat for me, please? 112 00:05:03,310 --> 00:05:06,869 Tracy! How was Majorca? Did Mick like the hotel? 113 00:05:06,870 --> 00:05:08,549 Erika, just go back to triage. 114 00:05:10,070 --> 00:05:11,789 I did explain that the doctor would be 115 00:05:11,790 --> 00:05:13,949 holding the cord inside. 116 00:05:13,950 --> 00:05:16,429 Probably didn't tell him I'd be wearing her like Kermit the Frog. 117 00:05:16,430 --> 00:05:17,829 I don't understand. 118 00:05:17,830 --> 00:05:22,149 That's baby's heartbeat. Welcome to the NHS. 119 00:05:31,430 --> 00:05:32,990 This is obs and gynae. 120 00:05:33,990 --> 00:05:35,510 Also known as brats and twats. 121 00:05:37,430 --> 00:05:39,670 You're generally sailing the ship alone... 122 00:05:40,710 --> 00:05:43,389 ... a ship that's massive and on fire and no-one's had 123 00:05:43,390 --> 00:05:45,030 the time to teach you how to sail. 124 00:05:46,390 --> 00:05:48,709 It's literally life or death here. 125 00:05:48,710 --> 00:05:51,909 And you're constantly being splashed by bodily fluids. 126 00:05:51,910 --> 00:05:53,750 Not even the fun kind. 127 00:05:57,110 --> 00:05:59,873 But what other doctors can say they end up with twice 128 00:05:59,874 --> 00:06:02,389 the number of patients they started with? 129 00:06:02,390 --> 00:06:04,350 Beat that, geriatrics. 130 00:06:06,830 --> 00:06:08,709 Clothes bill means I'm... 131 00:06:08,710 --> 00:06:10,950 ... probably running my job at a loss, though. 132 00:06:23,870 --> 00:06:26,829 Ah, Mr Lockhart. Having fun there? 133 00:06:26,830 --> 00:06:30,229 - I was just... - Yeah, I'm not entirely convinced I want to know. 134 00:06:30,230 --> 00:06:32,309 I don't know if you heard, there was a massive 135 00:06:32,310 --> 00:06:33,909 cord prolapse before. 136 00:06:33,910 --> 00:06:36,669 Erm, crash section. Got the baby out in 90 seconds. 137 00:06:36,670 --> 00:06:39,269 I heard that you rocked up ten minutes late, 138 00:06:39,270 --> 00:06:41,829 nearly killed a patient in the maintenance lift, 139 00:06:41,830 --> 00:06:44,949 then did a Caesarean section in casualwear. 140 00:06:44,950 --> 00:06:46,829 It was more that I took a short cut. 141 00:06:46,830 --> 00:06:49,309 Doctors aren't meant to take short cuts, Adam. 142 00:06:49,310 --> 00:06:51,429 Remember when I asked you to be an acting registrar? 143 00:06:51,430 --> 00:06:54,669 Can you try acting like a bloody registrar? 144 00:06:54,670 --> 00:06:57,229 I'll be in my office if you need me, 145 00:06:57,230 --> 00:06:59,310 which I strongly suggest you won't. 146 00:07:01,670 --> 00:07:02,870 You've missed a bit. 147 00:07:12,950 --> 00:07:14,950 Mind out, please, mind out. 148 00:07:24,870 --> 00:07:28,269 - It's really urgent! - I know, petal, but I promise you 149 00:07:28,270 --> 00:07:29,989 - the doctor won't be long. - Pinkie promise? 150 00:07:29,990 --> 00:07:32,189 Pinkie promise with a little cherry on top. 151 00:07:32,190 --> 00:07:33,989 Oh! 152 00:07:33,990 --> 00:07:36,550 Why don't you head back to where you were sitting? 153 00:07:39,350 --> 00:07:40,479 Moany old trout. 154 00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:42,080 - Morning, Ria. - Morning, Dr Kay. 155 00:07:42,150 --> 00:07:44,269 - Oh, there he is! - Ward round, Trace? 156 00:07:44,270 --> 00:07:46,229 Can I ask you something personal, darling? 157 00:07:46,230 --> 00:07:48,069 Is it, "Why do you look like shit this morning?" 158 00:07:48,070 --> 00:07:49,429 I wasn't going to ask it like that. 159 00:07:49,430 --> 00:07:50,829 I slept in my car last night. 160 00:07:50,830 --> 00:07:54,589 Well, it must be hard maintaining a relationship, 161 00:07:54,590 --> 00:07:56,389 what, with your job... 162 00:07:56,390 --> 00:07:58,909 ... and your personality. 163 00:07:58,910 --> 00:08:01,469 Tracy's the head midwife on today. 164 00:08:01,470 --> 00:08:03,630 I'd let her sew up my sister's perineum... 165 00:08:04,750 --> 00:08:06,509 ... which sounds weird, now that I've said it, 166 00:08:06,510 --> 00:08:08,309 but it's actually the highest compliment I can give. 167 00:08:08,310 --> 00:08:10,789 Oh, remember to remove the thick, shiny layer on the outside. 168 00:08:10,790 --> 00:08:14,029 Ignore him. His girlfriend's come to her senses and dumped him. 169 00:08:14,030 --> 00:08:16,829 - No-one's dumped anyone. - But if you do want to smack him, 170 00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:18,629 I will turn a blind eye. 171 00:08:18,630 --> 00:08:20,789 Do you mind if we nip to Room 8 first? 172 00:08:20,790 --> 00:08:23,269 She's making pretty slow progress. 173 00:08:23,270 --> 00:08:26,309 Pop downstairs and review Mrs Buckstar quickly. 174 00:08:26,310 --> 00:08:28,749 Doctors speak a lot of code, so it's "epididymo-orchitis" 175 00:08:28,750 --> 00:08:30,949 rather than "gammy cock and balls". 176 00:08:30,950 --> 00:08:32,829 "Review Mrs Buckstar," "Go to Starbucks." 177 00:08:32,830 --> 00:08:34,269 Which ward is Mrs Buckstar in? 178 00:08:34,270 --> 00:08:36,749 He wants you to get him a fancy coffee without me knowing. 179 00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:39,310 Milk and one sugar for me, please. 180 00:08:46,670 --> 00:08:49,669 I'm in labour, Mother, not quadriplegic. 181 00:08:49,670 --> 00:08:52,509 Hi. I'm Adam, one of the doctors. 182 00:08:52,510 --> 00:08:55,069 I'm afraid I've got some bad news. 183 00:08:55,070 --> 00:08:56,710 You've spelt 'pavilion' wrong. 184 00:09:00,350 --> 00:09:01,909 Would you like a sweetie, dear? 185 00:09:01,910 --> 00:09:04,109 The doctor's not going to give me better care 186 00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:07,550 - because you offer him a Murray Mint. - In fairness, I might, actually. 187 00:09:11,310 --> 00:09:12,990 All right? 188 00:09:16,150 --> 00:09:18,309 You've got a little bit stuck at six centimetres, 189 00:09:18,310 --> 00:09:19,909 so I suggest we wang the dose up 190 00:09:19,910 --> 00:09:22,870 - on the drip that's helping your contractions... - Is "wang" a medical term? 191 00:09:22,871 --> 00:09:25,950 Sure is. And if that doesn't work, we'll, erm... 192 00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:31,829 Anna, let's put the Synto onto 84 and re-examine in four hours. 193 00:09:31,830 --> 00:09:33,749 It won't be me, actually. I'll be home by then. 194 00:09:33,750 --> 00:09:35,709 - Really? - Well, I've been here 15 hours. 195 00:09:35,710 --> 00:09:38,829 If I stay any longer, they'll start charging me council tax. 196 00:09:38,830 --> 00:09:40,989 - Right. - Don't worry, darling, 197 00:09:40,990 --> 00:09:43,989 I'll do it, so at least it'll be a familiar face. 198 00:09:43,990 --> 00:09:45,989 Could you do the examination instead, Doctor? 199 00:09:45,990 --> 00:09:49,229 It does make more sense for Tracy to do it. 200 00:09:49,230 --> 00:09:51,749 - Where did you train? - Would you like me to pop home 201 00:09:51,750 --> 00:09:53,269 and get my degree certificates? 202 00:09:53,270 --> 00:09:55,589 There's no way you could stay, is there? 203 00:09:55,590 --> 00:09:58,589 Erm, I'm not sure I like where this is going. 204 00:09:58,590 --> 00:10:00,189 You're not saying I can't choose who 205 00:10:00,190 --> 00:10:02,149 does intimate examinations on me, are you? 206 00:10:02,150 --> 00:10:04,709 I'm saying you won't be choosing based on the colour of their skin. 207 00:10:04,710 --> 00:10:06,270 - Adam! - What? 208 00:10:06,271 --> 00:10:08,909 When did anyone say anything about skin colour? 209 00:10:08,910 --> 00:10:10,429 It's called patient choice. 210 00:10:10,430 --> 00:10:12,869 It's important to have choice, like tonight I might... 211 00:10:12,870 --> 00:10:16,149 ... choose to order a pizza rather than firebomb a mosque. 212 00:10:16,150 --> 00:10:17,829 I think what Dr Kay meant to say... 213 00:10:17,830 --> 00:10:20,589 What I'm saying is, I know it's stressful being on labour ward, 214 00:10:20,590 --> 00:10:22,869 but anything more like this, and I will have to have you 215 00:10:22,870 --> 00:10:24,709 removed from the building. Is that understood? 216 00:10:24,710 --> 00:10:28,429 OK. OK, let's crack on, shall we? 217 00:10:28,430 --> 00:10:30,509 Wanker. 218 00:10:30,510 --> 00:10:32,269 That had better be a crossword answer. 219 00:10:32,270 --> 00:10:34,630 No, dear, she called you a wanker. 220 00:10:39,630 --> 00:10:41,789 What the hell was all that about? 221 00:10:41,790 --> 00:10:44,469 I guess white supremacists have babies, too. 222 00:10:44,470 --> 00:10:46,229 Not her. You. 223 00:10:46,230 --> 00:10:49,709 - Me? - I don't need a white knight to defend my honour. 224 00:10:49,710 --> 00:10:51,229 Hang on. I'm the registrar. 225 00:10:51,230 --> 00:10:52,829 Acting registrar. 226 00:10:52,830 --> 00:10:55,709 - I'm the most senior doctor here. - Until somebody more senior turns up. 227 00:10:55,710 --> 00:10:58,500 Well, I'm running this ward now, and it's up to me... 228 00:10:58,501 --> 00:11:02,149 No, I'm running this ward, young man, and I'm more than capable 229 00:11:02,150 --> 00:11:04,269 of handling myself, and the moment that I can't, 230 00:11:04,270 --> 00:11:05,909 I'll let somebody know, 231 00:11:05,910 --> 00:11:09,429 and I don't want to spoil the surprise: it won't be you. 232 00:11:09,430 --> 00:11:12,069 And don't tell the patients that you're kicking them out. 233 00:11:12,070 --> 00:11:14,349 This is the NHS, not your golf club. 234 00:11:14,350 --> 00:11:15,989 Which room are we kicking out? 235 00:11:15,990 --> 00:11:18,009 No, we're not kicking anybody out, Benilda. 236 00:11:18,010 --> 00:11:19,449 - _ - They're all in labour, so 237 00:11:19,450 --> 00:11:21,749 we thought we might wait until they had their babies. 238 00:11:21,750 --> 00:11:23,349 - _ - Well, get a move on. 239 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:25,309 The hospital's on red alert for beds. 240 00:11:25,310 --> 00:11:27,469 We're actually more than halfway to black alert. 241 00:11:27,470 --> 00:11:30,030 So, like, dusky-merlot alert. 242 00:11:32,070 --> 00:11:34,309 Can you, er, go to gynae? 243 00:11:34,310 --> 00:11:36,029 The lady in bed 17's fit for home. 244 00:11:36,030 --> 00:11:38,629 I'm actually in the middle of a ward round. 245 00:11:38,630 --> 00:11:41,029 But, yeah, I mean, I'll find a moment. 246 00:11:41,030 --> 00:11:42,894 Before you do that, you'll need to fill out an incident form 247 00:11:42,895 --> 00:11:44,547 - for Room 8. - Hang on, I didn't have to do one 248 00:11:44,548 --> 00:11:46,210 for the cord prolapse. 249 00:11:57,750 --> 00:11:59,949 - Erika? - Third attendance this week 250 00:11:59,950 --> 00:12:02,469 with non-specific symptoms. 251 00:12:02,470 --> 00:12:05,469 OK, everybody, back to your jobs. We don't need the Polyphonic Spree. 252 00:12:05,470 --> 00:12:08,110 - Shoo, shoo. - Oh. Come on. 253 00:12:09,670 --> 00:12:11,949 Not you! 254 00:12:11,950 --> 00:12:14,070 Oh! Oh, God, I'm so sorry. 255 00:12:15,190 --> 00:12:18,309 Right, surprise me. What's the management? 256 00:12:18,310 --> 00:12:20,229 Right. Er... 257 00:12:20,230 --> 00:12:22,789 OK, well, I would, erm... 258 00:12:22,790 --> 00:12:24,589 ... check for a patent airway, 259 00:12:24,590 --> 00:12:26,229 er, then I would put her 260 00:12:26,230 --> 00:12:29,429 in the left lateral position, run high oxygen flow 261 00:12:29,430 --> 00:12:32,149 through a non-rebreather mask, erm, check for 262 00:12:32,150 --> 00:12:33,429 a pulse... 263 00:12:33,430 --> 00:12:35,670 So near and yet so shit. 264 00:12:37,270 --> 00:12:39,470 So, when people are really unconscious... 265 00:12:41,910 --> 00:12:43,950 ... their hands smash into their faces. 266 00:12:50,231 --> 00:12:52,420 _ 267 00:12:52,421 --> 00:12:54,909 - _ - Adam? 268 00:12:54,910 --> 00:12:56,030 Adam! 269 00:12:57,510 --> 00:12:58,829 Adam? 270 00:12:58,830 --> 00:13:00,749 Do you think I'm rubbish? 271 00:13:00,750 --> 00:13:03,029 Look, I wasn't great on my first week, either. 272 00:13:03,030 --> 00:13:04,990 I've been here two months! 273 00:13:08,150 --> 00:13:10,309 - Two months? - Well, I just haven't had a chance 274 00:13:10,310 --> 00:13:12,469 to do much hands-on stuff yet. 275 00:13:12,470 --> 00:13:14,109 How many babies have you delivered? 276 00:13:14,110 --> 00:13:15,629 Erm... 277 00:13:15,630 --> 00:13:17,589 No babies have needed delivery in two months? 278 00:13:17,590 --> 00:13:19,589 Everyone's always too busy to teach me. 279 00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:21,149 You just need to be less of a wallflower. 280 00:13:21,150 --> 00:13:22,910 It's dog eat dog in this place. 281 00:13:23,990 --> 00:13:25,230 And... 282 00:13:26,230 --> 00:13:27,630 ... the dogs eat wallflowers. 283 00:13:29,670 --> 00:13:32,269 Sorry, sorry, sorry. I've been elbow-deep in a patient, 284 00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:35,669 I've had an ethnostate in Room 8 and someone else playing dead. 285 00:13:35,670 --> 00:13:37,829 Oh, and I've got blood matted into my pubes. 286 00:13:37,830 --> 00:13:39,469 I love it when you talk dirty. 287 00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:41,069 Right, so, who did you say you were? 288 00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:42,749 My name's Harry. 289 00:13:42,750 --> 00:13:44,629 When you called my mother. 290 00:13:44,630 --> 00:13:46,430 I said I was your fuck buddy. 291 00:13:48,630 --> 00:13:49,989 I said I was your flatmate. 292 00:13:49,990 --> 00:13:51,869 But she knows we've only got one bedroom. 293 00:13:51,870 --> 00:13:54,309 Wild idea, but you know you could just... tell her about us? 294 00:13:54,310 --> 00:13:56,589 You don't know her. She'll turn you into stone, or something. 295 00:13:56,590 --> 00:13:59,389 Nah. Mums love me. It's like my superpower. 296 00:13:59,390 --> 00:14:01,229 How are we going to fake our own deaths, 297 00:14:01,230 --> 00:14:02,629 then, before Greg's stag do? 298 00:14:02,630 --> 00:14:04,509 I'm thinking avalanche, helicopter crash... 299 00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:07,109 - Ah, it'll be a laugh. - Carbon-monoxide poisoning? 300 00:14:07,110 --> 00:14:09,109 Shouldn't you pop along, 301 00:14:09,110 --> 00:14:11,509 - seeing as you're the best man? - Crap. I was meant to go to gynae. 302 00:14:11,510 --> 00:14:13,389 - Sorry, call you later. - Don't apologise. 303 00:14:13,390 --> 00:14:15,029 That's the longest call we've had in months. 304 00:14:15,030 --> 00:14:16,670 I was starting to get bored. 305 00:14:33,510 --> 00:14:34,909 Erm, good news, Mrs W. 306 00:14:34,910 --> 00:14:37,110 You are finally free to go home. 307 00:14:39,590 --> 00:14:41,630 Are you stupid? 308 00:14:42,950 --> 00:14:45,549 I was told you were good to go, but, yeah, you don't look great. 309 00:14:45,550 --> 00:14:47,109 Speak for yourself. 310 00:14:48,510 --> 00:14:50,989 Erm, must have been a bit of a mix-up. 311 00:14:50,990 --> 00:14:53,629 I'll come back later. I need to see someone else now. 312 00:14:53,630 --> 00:14:55,230 Hopefully a hairdresser. 313 00:15:07,950 --> 00:15:09,509 Dr Kay, you're needed in Room 4. 314 00:15:09,510 --> 00:15:10,910 Yes, I know... 315 00:15:27,950 --> 00:15:31,029 Never actually let the patient see the forceps. 316 00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,789 The only people happy with two-foot-long metal salad tongs 317 00:15:33,790 --> 00:15:35,989 inserted in their vaginas are people who aren't aware 318 00:15:35,990 --> 00:15:38,069 that there are two-foot-long metal salad tongs 319 00:15:38,070 --> 00:15:39,309 inserted in their vaginas. 320 00:15:39,310 --> 00:15:43,069 - It's only a few more minutes. - Shut up, Graham! 321 00:15:43,070 --> 00:15:45,189 - And put your shirt back on. - Just breathe. 322 00:15:45,190 --> 00:15:47,189 That's what's important. 323 00:15:47,190 --> 00:15:49,269 You're doing so good. 324 00:15:49,270 --> 00:15:51,589 You're doing so well. 325 00:15:51,590 --> 00:15:53,829 You're doing so well, my little soldier! 326 00:15:53,830 --> 00:15:56,750 - Shut up, Graham. - I'm going to play the song now. 327 00:15:58,070 --> 00:15:59,875 Seen one before? 328 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:02,989 - Yes... - See one, do one, teach one. 329 00:16:02,990 --> 00:16:04,549 I don't like this song. 330 00:16:04,550 --> 00:16:05,950 Change the song, change the song. 331 00:16:07,870 --> 00:16:09,869 Wait for a contraction. 332 00:16:09,870 --> 00:16:11,149 And pull. 333 00:16:11,150 --> 00:16:12,749 You got to keep breathing. 334 00:16:14,070 --> 00:16:16,309 Just find your centre, baby. 335 00:16:16,310 --> 00:16:17,669 - No stress. - Graham... 336 00:16:20,070 --> 00:16:22,289 - Dr Kay speaking. - It's Greg. You've not answered 337 00:16:22,290 --> 00:16:24,829 any emails in four days. No-one even knows where we're meeting. 338 00:16:24,830 --> 00:16:28,229 - Push, push, push, push, push! - Pull as hard as you can! Now! 339 00:16:28,230 --> 00:16:29,949 Oh, God, tell me you're not having sex. 340 00:16:29,950 --> 00:16:32,349 - Just on labour ward right now. - I know it's traditional 341 00:16:32,350 --> 00:16:34,669 for the best man to humiliate the groom on his stag do, 342 00:16:34,670 --> 00:16:37,629 and traditionally that involves handcuffs and a sex worker... 343 00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,189 Just put some oomph into it. 344 00:16:39,190 --> 00:16:41,469 Welly's threatening to take over and drag us all to a strip club. 345 00:16:41,470 --> 00:16:43,349 No, no, no, we won't be going to... breast clinic. 346 00:16:43,350 --> 00:16:45,309 If this doesn't work, will we have to do a Caesarean? 347 00:16:45,310 --> 00:16:48,909 It will work. Erm, look, it's all going to be civilised, don't worry. 348 00:16:48,910 --> 00:16:51,389 You say, "Don't worry," but you'll understand why I am still worried. 349 00:16:51,390 --> 00:16:53,909 Tell everyone 8 o'clock upstairs at the Crown. 350 00:16:53,910 --> 00:16:56,269 I'll see you later. I really need to get back to this vagina. 351 00:16:56,270 --> 00:16:58,589 Yeah, well, you're definitely not having sex, then. 352 00:16:58,590 --> 00:17:00,389 You got to stay breathing, OK? 353 00:17:00,390 --> 00:17:02,269 That's it, that's it. You're doing brilliantly. 354 00:17:02,270 --> 00:17:03,989 - Thanks. - I was talking to the patient. 355 00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:06,949 Nice and slowly, nice and slowly. Don't let her tear. 356 00:17:06,950 --> 00:17:09,749 - You're so beautiful! - Graham, just stop. 357 00:17:09,750 --> 00:17:11,109 Nice and slowly, nice and... 358 00:17:11,110 --> 00:17:14,509 Dad, do you want to come down and see baby being born? 359 00:17:14,510 --> 00:17:17,630 - Oh, my God, where's its face?! - What's the matter with his face?! 360 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:21,909 His face is fine. 361 00:17:21,910 --> 00:17:23,869 Just on the front of his head, not the back. 362 00:17:23,870 --> 00:17:26,150 Remember I said, "Don't let her tear"? 363 00:17:40,350 --> 00:17:43,270 Adam's a good name. 364 00:17:46,830 --> 00:17:48,749 You've got a bit of a tear going into the back passage. 365 00:17:48,750 --> 00:17:50,629 We'll get you round to theatre, 366 00:17:50,630 --> 00:17:53,389 and have that repaired nicely for you. 367 00:17:53,390 --> 00:17:55,390 Won't take more than an hour or so. 368 00:18:35,630 --> 00:18:38,269 Adam, I'm so sorry. I wish I could've sewn it up myself. 369 00:18:38,270 --> 00:18:40,349 - I've just never actually done it... - It's fine. 370 00:18:40,350 --> 00:18:42,389 Besides, my genitals were wondering why 371 00:18:42,390 --> 00:18:44,430 they hadn't been covered in blood for a few hours. 372 00:18:50,470 --> 00:18:52,229 Better do an incident form. 373 00:18:52,230 --> 00:18:54,109 How are we doing here, then? 374 00:18:54,110 --> 00:18:55,629 All under control, Mr Lockhart. 375 00:18:55,630 --> 00:18:57,389 - Miracles never cease. - Could you just have... 376 00:18:57,390 --> 00:18:59,549 I thought I told you to discharge that gynae patient. 377 00:18:59,550 --> 00:19:00,949 I see the miracles have ceased. 378 00:19:00,950 --> 00:19:02,309 No. But she's not even... 379 00:19:02,310 --> 00:19:04,949 Are my team causing you trouble, Ms Mendoza? 380 00:19:04,950 --> 00:19:06,429 We're full on labour ward. 381 00:19:06,430 --> 00:19:08,709 Post-nates, ante-nates, gynae. I don't know how we're supposed 382 00:19:08,710 --> 00:19:10,829 to admit anyone from A&E. 383 00:19:10,830 --> 00:19:13,669 We've been on red alert all day, and we're practically at black alert. 384 00:19:13,670 --> 00:19:16,789 Burgundy alert, then. 385 00:19:16,790 --> 00:19:18,989 I'm sure we can do something about that for you. 386 00:19:18,990 --> 00:19:21,309 - Can't we, Dr Kay? - Yeah, we could pull out 387 00:19:21,310 --> 00:19:23,549 the patient's drips, and chuck her out the window. 388 00:19:23,550 --> 00:19:25,109 I knew you'd think of something. 389 00:19:25,110 --> 00:19:27,549 - Leave it with us. - Can I help at all? 390 00:19:27,550 --> 00:19:29,549 You could pop down to the coffee shop. 391 00:19:29,550 --> 00:19:31,309 There's a vacancy for a barista. 392 00:19:31,310 --> 00:19:34,709 Shruti did her first forcep delivery earlier. 393 00:19:34,710 --> 00:19:36,109 Er, yeah, yeah. 394 00:19:36,110 --> 00:19:38,429 She had been in second stage for over an hour, and we... 395 00:19:38,430 --> 00:19:40,630 Very good. Walk with me, Adam. 396 00:19:42,950 --> 00:19:44,509 Quick story for you. 397 00:19:44,510 --> 00:19:46,629 So, there's this acting obstetric registrar, 398 00:19:46,630 --> 00:19:51,429 and he walks into a room and he calls his patient a Nazi. 399 00:19:51,430 --> 00:19:53,589 Oh, you're making it so much worse than it was. 400 00:19:53,590 --> 00:19:55,909 - She was being racist to Tracy... - Every mother and baby 401 00:19:55,910 --> 00:19:58,429 on this ward is relying on your good decisions, 402 00:19:58,430 --> 00:20:01,349 and your good judgment. Apologise to Tracy, 403 00:20:01,350 --> 00:20:03,109 apologise to the patient, 404 00:20:03,110 --> 00:20:04,830 and send some people home. 405 00:20:06,710 --> 00:20:08,029 Oh, and, Adam? 406 00:20:08,030 --> 00:20:09,909 Stop being shit. 407 00:20:24,550 --> 00:20:26,269 Rachel Glover? 408 00:20:26,270 --> 00:20:27,670 Kerry Salisbury? 409 00:20:29,310 --> 00:20:30,910 Caroline Morobeto? 410 00:21:02,590 --> 00:21:06,349 So, you've recovered from earlier. 411 00:21:06,350 --> 00:21:08,629 Oh, yes. Oh, God, sorry, Dr Adam. 412 00:21:08,630 --> 00:21:09,989 I don't know what came over me. 413 00:21:09,990 --> 00:21:11,909 So, remind me, how many weeks are you? 414 00:21:11,910 --> 00:21:14,229 Oh, God, I hate maths. 415 00:21:14,230 --> 00:21:17,629 I couldn't even tell you in months. Er... 416 00:21:17,630 --> 00:21:19,389 Erm, OK, let's think. 417 00:21:19,390 --> 00:21:22,349 So... Birthday's in June. 418 00:21:22,350 --> 00:21:23,470 I'll be 27... 419 00:21:25,470 --> 00:21:28,110 Well, it's got to be, like, 2,000 weeks? 420 00:21:29,470 --> 00:21:31,150 You're 25 weeks. 421 00:21:32,510 --> 00:21:34,349 Oh! 422 00:21:34,350 --> 00:21:35,749 You mean the baby. 423 00:21:38,270 --> 00:21:42,029 So, erm, what's the... problem? 424 00:21:42,030 --> 00:21:46,269 Well, I woke up this morning with a headache, 425 00:21:46,270 --> 00:21:50,309 and my tongue is just, like, totally covered in spots. 426 00:21:50,310 --> 00:21:52,110 Right. Let's have a look. 427 00:21:56,430 --> 00:21:58,150 OK. 428 00:22:00,790 --> 00:22:04,589 I'm afraid that what you have is known as... 429 00:22:04,590 --> 00:22:06,390 ... taste buds. 430 00:22:08,830 --> 00:22:11,350 Oh. 431 00:22:14,310 --> 00:22:16,549 So, is there someone at home we can call 432 00:22:16,550 --> 00:22:18,309 to come and collect you, 433 00:22:18,310 --> 00:22:20,389 or do you live here now? 434 00:22:20,390 --> 00:22:22,870 Oh, God, no, who'd want to live with me? 435 00:22:26,910 --> 00:22:28,430 Right. 436 00:22:33,430 --> 00:22:36,389 Adam, that lady you just saw, her blood pressure's a bit high. 437 00:22:36,390 --> 00:22:39,029 - Do you want me to send her for some bloods? - Just send her home. 438 00:22:39,030 --> 00:22:42,230 No, wait. Erm, yes, do the bloods. 439 00:22:43,630 --> 00:22:45,190 Yep? 440 00:22:46,550 --> 00:22:48,230 What's the trace like? 441 00:22:50,710 --> 00:22:52,950 Isn't the evening registrar here yet? 442 00:22:55,510 --> 00:22:57,669 OK. Fine. 443 00:22:57,670 --> 00:22:59,909 Right, we're doing a Caesarean for Room 8. 444 00:22:59,910 --> 00:23:02,749 Dr Adam? Dr Adam, sorry, sorry, I meant to say. 445 00:23:02,750 --> 00:23:05,069 My teeth have become a bit itchy. 446 00:23:05,070 --> 00:23:06,550 Send her home. 447 00:23:07,630 --> 00:23:09,709 Don't ask to do it. I'm tired. 448 00:23:09,710 --> 00:23:11,309 I need to be gone ten minutes ago. 449 00:23:11,310 --> 00:23:12,949 Erm, so, we're all good to go. 450 00:23:12,950 --> 00:23:14,509 We'll have baby out in five minutes, 451 00:23:14,510 --> 00:23:18,029 and may I just say, I misspoke before 452 00:23:18,030 --> 00:23:21,229 - and I'm very sorry. - All water under the bridge. 453 00:23:21,230 --> 00:23:23,229 But just checking it will be you doing this operation 454 00:23:23,230 --> 00:23:25,070 and nobody else. 455 00:23:26,990 --> 00:23:28,709 Yes. 456 00:23:28,710 --> 00:23:30,350 Yes, it will. Yeah. 457 00:23:36,030 --> 00:23:39,389 Actually, fuck it. You've got to learn some time. You're up. 458 00:23:39,390 --> 00:23:41,269 - Come on, you've seen one. - Y... yeah... 459 00:23:41,270 --> 00:23:44,069 So you know the routine. See one, fuck one up, teach one. 460 00:23:44,070 --> 00:23:46,869 Really? Thank you. 461 00:23:46,870 --> 00:23:49,470 - Are you sure? - Not especially. Come on. 462 00:23:57,790 --> 00:23:59,310 Are you happy? 463 00:24:01,670 --> 00:24:03,230 Right, come on. 464 00:24:05,430 --> 00:24:07,469 - This it? - Yeah. Hurry up, please, 465 00:24:07,470 --> 00:24:09,910 I think the anaesthetist's retiring next week. 466 00:24:14,750 --> 00:24:16,549 - Adam? - Mm? 467 00:24:16,550 --> 00:24:19,029 Stretch it. Come on. Harder than that. 468 00:24:19,030 --> 00:24:20,910 Right, through the peritoneum, then. 469 00:24:22,950 --> 00:24:25,549 Pop your finger in. You're not going to damage anything. 470 00:24:25,550 --> 00:24:27,709 OK. 471 00:24:27,710 --> 00:24:29,150 Oh! 472 00:24:32,670 --> 00:24:35,109 Adam? Adam? 473 00:24:35,110 --> 00:24:37,789 Er, yeah, OK, good. Great. So, you're going to make 474 00:24:37,790 --> 00:24:40,349 a U-shape in the lower segment of the uterus, 475 00:24:40,350 --> 00:24:42,349 and then you're going to extend it with your fingers. 476 00:24:42,350 --> 00:24:43,949 What if there isn't a lower segment? 477 00:24:43,950 --> 00:24:46,189 You know, like if it's before 32 weeks. 478 00:24:46,190 --> 00:24:48,389 Yeah, we usually save the Q&A session for afterwards. 479 00:24:48,390 --> 00:24:51,069 It would just be a horrible, bloody mess. Come on, get on with it. 480 00:24:51,070 --> 00:24:52,949 - Is that... ? - Good. 481 00:24:52,950 --> 00:24:54,469 Now what? 482 00:24:54,470 --> 00:24:56,669 I think even you can guess what happens next. Come on. 483 00:24:56,670 --> 00:24:58,349 That's it. 484 00:24:58,350 --> 00:25:00,390 Just guide the head out. It's coming. 485 00:25:01,910 --> 00:25:03,390 OK. 486 00:25:04,950 --> 00:25:06,350 That's it. 487 00:25:08,070 --> 00:25:10,789 One baby coming up... 488 00:25:15,830 --> 00:25:18,069 No, get her off me. I'm not having a Paki 489 00:25:18,070 --> 00:25:20,149 delivering my baby! Get her off me! 490 00:25:20,150 --> 00:25:23,629 Stop touching it! You promised that you would do it! 491 00:25:23,630 --> 00:25:26,269 Excuse me, get me out of this! Take this! 492 00:25:26,270 --> 00:25:27,989 What is this? Get this off me! 493 00:25:27,990 --> 00:25:30,310 - Adolf's a good name. - Mum, will you do something?! 494 00:25:32,630 --> 00:25:34,070 You did really well. 495 00:25:35,350 --> 00:25:37,670 One Caesarean down, 8,000 to go. 496 00:25:38,870 --> 00:25:41,469 To be fair, they don't normally end like that. 497 00:25:41,470 --> 00:25:44,790 Erm, write up the notes and mention that I closed the skin. 498 00:25:48,270 --> 00:25:50,830 Oh, gosh, isn't he wonderful? 499 00:26:04,190 --> 00:26:05,830 Oh, for... 500 00:26:11,790 --> 00:26:13,269 Cancellations hotline. 501 00:26:13,270 --> 00:26:15,869 Press 1 for you need to stay at work, leaving me to make 502 00:26:15,870 --> 00:26:20,029 small talk with 20 public-school dickheads I barely know. 503 00:26:20,030 --> 00:26:23,149 That's unfair. There's only 15 of them. 504 00:26:23,150 --> 00:26:24,589 And I'm just leaving now. 505 00:26:24,590 --> 00:26:27,869 - No way! - Can you bring a change of clothes, please? 506 00:26:27,870 --> 00:26:30,309 Yeah. Anything in particular? 507 00:26:30,310 --> 00:26:31,509 Erm, something smart-casual 508 00:26:31,510 --> 00:26:34,309 and not totally encrusted with a stranger's blood? 509 00:26:34,310 --> 00:26:36,309 Hula skirt and feather boa it is, then. 510 00:26:36,310 --> 00:26:38,190 See you in a bit. 511 00:26:42,150 --> 00:26:44,029 You can't help being ill, darling. 512 00:26:44,030 --> 00:26:46,389 I'll just get somebody else to pick her up. 513 00:26:46,390 --> 00:26:49,469 Right. Bye-bye. 514 00:26:49,470 --> 00:26:51,309 Er, Adam? 515 00:26:51,310 --> 00:26:53,269 I saw what you did to that dolphin. 516 00:26:53,270 --> 00:26:55,349 A gentleman never discusses a lady's blowhole. 517 00:26:55,350 --> 00:26:57,669 - Do you want my advice, Adam? - Erm, not really. 518 00:26:57,670 --> 00:26:59,309 That is exactly your problem. 519 00:26:59,310 --> 00:27:01,270 It was pretty funny, though, right? 520 00:28:03,070 --> 00:28:04,789 It's my second-favourite doctor! 521 00:28:04,790 --> 00:28:06,029 Who's number one? 522 00:28:06,030 --> 00:28:07,550 David Tennant. First series. 523 00:28:11,150 --> 00:28:13,709 - How was work? - Fine, thanks. Who are they? 524 00:28:13,710 --> 00:28:16,069 No idea, but they're better craic than your mates upstairs. 525 00:28:16,070 --> 00:28:17,389 Oh, come on. 526 00:28:17,390 --> 00:28:19,549 I'm sure you'll find something in common with them. 527 00:28:19,550 --> 00:28:22,229 There you go. See? Wearing the same T-shirt. 528 00:28:22,230 --> 00:28:24,629 Some guy called... Welly brought them. 529 00:28:24,630 --> 00:28:27,230 Well, they're not too terrible, considering. 530 00:28:30,790 --> 00:28:32,910 Shall we just do this? Come on. 531 00:28:39,950 --> 00:28:42,669 Ah! 7:58. There you go. 532 00:28:42,670 --> 00:28:45,909 I knew you wouldn't let me down. 533 00:28:45,910 --> 00:28:49,629 - No, you didn't. - Yeah, fine. May have lost a small bet. 534 00:28:49,630 --> 00:28:52,029 Nightmare! This place doesn't do Jagerbombs! 535 00:28:52,030 --> 00:28:53,389 Whatever will we do? 536 00:28:53,390 --> 00:28:56,630 - Adster! - Welly. Don't do that. 537 00:28:58,070 --> 00:29:01,749 - Where's your T-shirt? - Yeah, Adster, where's your T-shirt? 538 00:29:01,750 --> 00:29:03,390 Put it on. 539 00:29:05,190 --> 00:29:06,909 Put it on. 540 00:29:06,910 --> 00:29:12,910 Put it on, put it on, put it on, put it on! 541 00:29:13,670 --> 00:29:16,189 Yes! And as for you... 542 00:29:16,190 --> 00:29:18,549 ... one pint of gin. 543 00:29:18,550 --> 00:29:19,949 No, I'm not going to drink that. 544 00:29:19,950 --> 00:29:21,554 Well, you will be, because it's tradi-ti-on. 545 00:29:21,555 --> 00:29:23,909 How can it be a tradition? I've never got married before. 546 00:29:23,910 --> 00:29:26,549 Right, I need a drink. Is this my stuff? 547 00:29:26,550 --> 00:29:28,989 - So, did your mum call? - She left a voicemail. 548 00:29:28,990 --> 00:29:30,989 Ah. And you didn't listen. 549 00:29:30,990 --> 00:29:33,990 No. I'm changing my number and moving to Venezuela. 550 00:29:35,670 --> 00:29:37,029 You done there? 551 00:29:38,550 --> 00:29:40,389 Right, come on, what do you want? 552 00:29:40,390 --> 00:29:44,109 I think 12 litres of vodka Red Bull should probably do it. 553 00:29:44,110 --> 00:29:46,669 Er, can I get a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc and... 554 00:29:48,310 --> 00:29:51,029 - ... a rum and Coke, please? - This'll be Jakesy. 555 00:29:51,030 --> 00:29:53,029 He's probably gone to Poland by mistake. Hello? 556 00:29:53,030 --> 00:29:55,869 - Kay. - Mr Lockhart! I'm just in a... 557 00:29:55,870 --> 00:29:57,509 Pint of gin, pint of gin! 558 00:29:57,510 --> 00:29:59,229 ... supermarket. 559 00:29:59,230 --> 00:30:01,509 Sorry, Mr Lockhart, how can I help? 560 00:30:01,510 --> 00:30:04,349 Er, listen, the locum registrar 561 00:30:04,350 --> 00:30:06,830 hasn't turned up for the night shift. 562 00:30:07,910 --> 00:30:10,189 Erm... Who's the senior reg? 563 00:30:10,190 --> 00:30:13,150 Er, I don't think he'd get here from Sydney in time. 564 00:30:14,270 --> 00:30:17,029 Well, do say if you've got something more important on. 565 00:30:17,030 --> 00:30:19,669 Erm, no. No, no, no. Erm... 566 00:30:19,670 --> 00:30:21,229 No, I can do it. 567 00:30:21,230 --> 00:30:22,990 Will the missus understand? 568 00:30:27,150 --> 00:30:29,669 - She'll be fine with it. - Good man. Bye! 569 00:30:36,670 --> 00:30:39,149 How long are you going to be? A couple of hours? 570 00:30:39,150 --> 00:30:41,950 - 12. I'm so sorry. - And there's no-one else who could... ? 571 00:30:44,510 --> 00:30:47,030 I'm sorry. It's really crap for you. 572 00:30:50,510 --> 00:30:54,269 - You don't have to stay here, obviously. - I'll be grand. 573 00:30:54,270 --> 00:30:56,230 I've never had a... pint of gin before. 574 00:30:58,390 --> 00:31:00,829 Just a couple more years, then I'll be a consultant, 575 00:31:00,830 --> 00:31:03,229 and it'll just be me, you and an Aston Martin. 576 00:31:03,230 --> 00:31:06,389 It would be nice to live somewhere a bit more spacious. 577 00:31:06,390 --> 00:31:08,428 - We can shower in the glove compartment. - Right, go on. 578 00:31:08,429 --> 00:31:10,270 You've got some babies to deliver. 579 00:31:13,110 --> 00:31:15,709 You should have gone along with my avalanche idea. 580 00:31:15,710 --> 00:31:18,469 OK, your first best-manly duty is to rescue my dad. 581 00:31:18,470 --> 00:31:21,389 Welly's trying to get him to drink a shoe full of sambuca. 582 00:31:21,390 --> 00:31:23,350 Shoe-ca! Shoe-ca! 583 00:31:25,430 --> 00:31:28,109 You're going to hate me. 584 00:31:28,110 --> 00:31:30,789 There's a... staffing emergency at the hospital. 585 00:31:30,790 --> 00:31:32,469 There's no doctors on labour ward. 586 00:31:32,470 --> 00:31:33,795 - No. - So I have to go back in. 587 00:31:33,796 --> 00:31:36,130 Drink this. Then you can't go in. 588 00:31:38,150 --> 00:31:41,109 - I can't. - OK, give me one good reason. 589 00:31:41,110 --> 00:31:42,549 Er... 590 00:31:42,550 --> 00:31:45,590 - Er, because I, erm... - Because you'd rather be at work. 591 00:31:46,750 --> 00:31:48,470 Yeah, have a good night, mate. 592 00:31:56,470 --> 00:31:58,150 Fuck's sake! 593 00:32:42,550 --> 00:32:45,029 Do you want the good news or the bad news? 594 00:32:45,030 --> 00:32:47,469 - Erm, the good. - Oh, I was worried you'd say that. 595 00:32:47,470 --> 00:32:49,269 It's all bad, I'm afraid. 596 00:32:49,270 --> 00:32:51,029 The wards are stuffed to the gills, 597 00:32:51,030 --> 00:32:54,669 there's no SHO, and the midwife in charge is Tracy. 598 00:32:54,670 --> 00:32:56,829 - Well, she was working during the day. - The other one. 599 00:32:56,830 --> 00:33:00,029 "Non-Reassuring Trace." 600 00:33:00,030 --> 00:33:01,829 Right, I'm off home. But call me whenever. 601 00:33:01,830 --> 00:33:03,710 - I won't. - Good man. 602 00:33:05,590 --> 00:33:08,229 You're very intent on showing me your penis today. 603 00:33:08,230 --> 00:33:11,378 They need to increase the credits on the scrub machine. 604 00:33:11,379 --> 00:33:13,211 You can practically tell who did your circumcision. 605 00:33:13,212 --> 00:33:15,070 Made a right meal of it. 606 00:33:19,550 --> 00:33:21,310 Keep going. 607 00:33:27,470 --> 00:33:30,349 - Hi, Trace. How can I help? - Oh, Doctor, thank God you're here. 608 00:33:30,350 --> 00:33:32,349 Can you see Room 11 for me? 609 00:33:32,350 --> 00:33:34,829 I'm desperately worried about her. 610 00:33:34,830 --> 00:33:37,229 Quick as you can. 611 00:34:00,630 --> 00:34:02,590 Yeah. Yeah, it was amazing. 612 00:34:03,910 --> 00:34:07,229 No, I didn't take a photo! It's someone else's baby! 613 00:34:07,230 --> 00:34:09,909 Yeah, I know, Mum said the exact same thing. 614 00:34:09,910 --> 00:34:12,229 Actually, I'm not going to make it home this weekend, 615 00:34:12,230 --> 00:34:14,989 but, erm... 616 00:34:14,990 --> 00:34:18,629 Mm-hm. Yeah, erm, I love you, too. OK. Bye. 617 00:34:18,630 --> 00:34:19,989 Bye. 618 00:34:19,990 --> 00:34:21,949 What the hell are you still doing here? 619 00:34:21,950 --> 00:34:24,549 Don't you have a depressing flat to go back to? 620 00:34:24,550 --> 00:34:26,829 The incident forms are longer than you think. 621 00:34:26,830 --> 00:34:28,469 Just go home. 622 00:34:28,470 --> 00:34:30,989 I'll do yours when I do mine. 623 00:34:30,990 --> 00:34:33,109 - This is yours. - Oh, no way! 624 00:34:34,630 --> 00:34:37,389 I wouldn't break a sweat. Non-Reassuring-Tracey's on. 625 00:34:37,390 --> 00:34:39,229 The patient's probably farted. 626 00:34:45,590 --> 00:34:47,389 25 weeks. First baby. 627 00:34:47,390 --> 00:34:50,229 Blood pressure's through the roof. 628 00:34:50,230 --> 00:34:53,109 Grade one Caesarean section. 629 00:34:53,110 --> 00:34:54,949 Get anaesthetics round to theatres now. 630 00:34:54,950 --> 00:34:57,709 Tell paeds it's a 25-weeker with placental abruption. 631 00:34:57,710 --> 00:34:59,549 Severe pre-eclampsia. 632 00:34:59,550 --> 00:35:01,589 Turns out I probably shouldn't have sent her home. 633 00:35:01,590 --> 00:35:04,629 Erika, listen. I'm very worried about your baby. 634 00:35:04,630 --> 00:35:06,949 Placenta's coming away. I need to deliver you immediately 635 00:35:06,950 --> 00:35:08,749 to save baby's life. 636 00:35:08,750 --> 00:35:11,669 - It's too early! - I'm going to perform a Caesarean section. 637 00:35:11,670 --> 00:35:14,030 Do you understand? 638 00:35:16,990 --> 00:35:18,589 Do you want your consultant in? 639 00:35:18,590 --> 00:35:20,350 I've got this, thanks, Tracy. 640 00:35:21,430 --> 00:35:24,389 - Is my sister here? - We've called her, and she'll be here in time 641 00:35:24,390 --> 00:35:26,909 - to say hello to your baby. - Or goodbye. 642 00:35:26,910 --> 00:35:30,709 Why don't you count down from 20 for me? 643 00:35:30,710 --> 00:35:33,229 20, 19... 18... 644 00:35:33,230 --> 00:35:34,830 Come on. 645 00:35:36,470 --> 00:35:38,749 - Are you happy? - Ready when you are. 646 00:35:38,750 --> 00:35:41,629 - Adam, have you done a 25-week Caesarean before? - No. 647 00:35:41,630 --> 00:35:43,190 I've seen one. 648 00:35:55,430 --> 00:35:57,990 Pull. Quick. And retractor in. 649 00:36:45,430 --> 00:36:46,629 Adam? 650 00:36:46,630 --> 00:36:49,429 - Yeah, chest movement. - Adam? 651 00:36:49,430 --> 00:36:52,509 - Adam! - Er, sorry. Swabs, please. 652 00:36:52,510 --> 00:36:54,350 Let's start the suction. 653 00:37:01,430 --> 00:37:03,310 Oh, my God. 654 00:37:05,390 --> 00:37:07,389 Come on. Shit. 655 00:37:07,390 --> 00:37:10,189 Pressures aren't great here. What's the blood loss like? 656 00:37:10,190 --> 00:37:12,029 Er, it's a litre, a litre-and-a-half. 657 00:37:12,030 --> 00:37:14,149 Can you bleep the on-call haematologist? 658 00:37:14,150 --> 00:37:16,949 I'm going to need some more blood products. 659 00:37:16,950 --> 00:37:19,670 Find out who's the anaesthetic consultant. 660 00:37:20,870 --> 00:37:22,630 More swabs. 661 00:37:27,510 --> 00:37:29,909 I-I can't see anything. It's too thick to stitch. 662 00:37:29,910 --> 00:37:32,589 So much blood. Shit, I can't... 663 00:37:32,590 --> 00:37:34,429 I... I can't get it under... 664 00:37:34,430 --> 00:37:35,869 Fuck! 665 00:37:35,870 --> 00:37:39,029 This is insane. I can't... I can't see anything. Shit! 666 00:37:39,030 --> 00:37:40,629 - Fuck! - Adam... 667 00:37:40,630 --> 00:37:42,309 ... you can do this. 668 00:37:42,310 --> 00:37:43,870 I can't. I can't do this. 669 00:37:44,950 --> 00:37:47,509 This woman's going to die, and it's my fault. 670 00:37:47,510 --> 00:37:49,390 Shall we get Mr Lockhart in? 671 00:37:53,670 --> 00:37:56,629 - Yeah. Yeah, please. - Tracy, will you call Mr Lockhart 672 00:37:56,630 --> 00:37:58,149 and ask him to come in, please? 673 00:37:58,150 --> 00:38:00,120 I called him before you started. 674 00:38:00,121 --> 00:38:01,230 Why did you do that? I... 675 00:38:02,750 --> 00:38:04,230 Thank you. 676 00:38:53,950 --> 00:38:55,550 I'm really sorry. 677 00:39:02,150 --> 00:39:04,149 It was really busy, 678 00:39:04,150 --> 00:39:06,789 and I genuinely thought that she was crying wolf. 679 00:39:06,790 --> 00:39:09,869 She was crying severe early-onset pre-eclampsia, 680 00:39:09,870 --> 00:39:13,589 which you'd have known if you'd done so much as a blood test. 681 00:39:13,590 --> 00:39:16,189 And then, for some reason, you attempted an operation 682 00:39:16,190 --> 00:39:18,230 any consultant would struggle with. 683 00:39:19,710 --> 00:39:22,189 Oh, you can buy Tracy a box of chocolates, by the way, 684 00:39:22,190 --> 00:39:23,830 for calling me in. 685 00:39:27,030 --> 00:39:29,430 - Can I just say... ? - No! 686 00:39:31,990 --> 00:39:37,270 Amend your entry from when you first saw this patient this afternoon. 687 00:39:39,110 --> 00:39:41,389 Write that you discussed with me over the phone, 688 00:39:41,390 --> 00:39:44,469 and that I advised you to send her home. 689 00:39:44,470 --> 00:39:46,389 What? 690 00:39:46,390 --> 00:39:48,549 No, you don't have to do that. 691 00:39:48,550 --> 00:39:50,630 Well, you didn't have to come in tonight. 692 00:39:53,350 --> 00:39:54,870 - I did. - Yeah, you did. 693 00:40:08,310 --> 00:40:10,789 Hi. Um... 694 00:40:10,790 --> 00:40:12,670 ... something to keep you going. 695 00:41:03,471 --> 00:41:06,932 _ 696 00:41:44,510 --> 00:41:48,350 Hi. I'm one of the obstetric, erm, registrars. 697 00:41:49,310 --> 00:41:51,629 Are you lost? 698 00:41:51,630 --> 00:41:53,669 Erm, I'm looking for... 699 00:41:53,670 --> 00:41:55,709 ... baby Van Hegan. The 25-weeker. 700 00:41:55,710 --> 00:41:58,590 Ah! Are you the one who, er... ? 701 00:42:02,230 --> 00:42:05,270 Well, you're not going to knock over the incubator, are you? 702 00:42:06,590 --> 00:42:07,950 Bed 5. 703 00:42:36,550 --> 00:42:38,189 I'm really sorry. 704 00:42:38,190 --> 00:42:42,110 I was... really tired, and I just wanted to get home. 705 00:42:43,910 --> 00:42:46,550 And... this place is insane. 706 00:42:47,910 --> 00:42:49,709 And... 707 00:42:49,710 --> 00:42:51,229 ... I fucked up. 708 00:42:51,230 --> 00:42:53,429 I mucked up. 709 00:42:53,430 --> 00:42:55,709 Sorry. 710 00:42:55,710 --> 00:42:57,470 I tried my best. 711 00:43:01,150 --> 00:43:04,070 Just promise me you'll have a normal head scan. 712 00:43:22,910 --> 00:43:25,030 Enjoy your last night of pussy. 713 00:45:50,000 --> 00:45:55,000 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 54296

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