All language subtitles for Dollface.S02E05.720p.HULU.WEBRip.x264-GalaxyTV

‐ I mean, I'd marry me.
Look at this. She's eligible.

Smile!

"Tinis for the girls"? What girls?

‐ If you think that's bad,

you don't wanna see what else I dug up.

‐ What the hell?

Madison said she had a work thing tonight.

But, what girls? Stella's with Liv,
and Izzy is with Liam,

hence my pasta for one.

‐ Jules, Jules, Jules.

I got the dirt...
and it's filthy.

Posted 24 minutes ago.

‐ Another martini?

‐ Ruby's Instagram story!

I'm sorry to tell you this,

but they're together.

No!

‐ Yes.

Same blue cheese olives,

same toothpick.

You do the math. ‐ Well,

Madison said it was a work thing,

so they're probably
meeting a potential client.

‐ That look like business casual to you?

‐ That's not one of her work tops!

That's a going out top!

‐ I got a whole dossier on those two!

Venmo transactions

with just a wine emoji.

Overheard inside jokes.

Face it, doll, your BFF
is stepping out on you.

She's having

a friend affair!

‐ No!

‐ You gonna eat that?

‐ Are you working or can
I complain to you about something?

‐ Did you know Rami Malek has
a twin brother named Sami Malek?

Unhinged.

‐ I'll take that as a "no" on the working.

‐ Okay, who are we shit‐talking?
‐ No one.

Well, uh,
Madison's new friend Ruby.

Sort of, but I don't wanna
say anything bad about anyone.

‐ Then I'm gonna lose
interest in this pretty quickly.

It's just she and Madison
are always together.

They went from 0 to 1,000...
percent annoying.

‐ Isn't Madison the one you're lying
to about fucking the veterinarian?

‐ Oh. I forgot I told you that.

But, it's actually really complicated.

‐ Okay, bitch, bullet points.
‐ Okay.

He's telling his ex this weekend
that she needs to move out.

‐ Wow, boundaries! Love to see it.
‐ I know.

He's driving her to her parents' house
in Arizona for the 4th.

‐ So, he's just gonna, like,
leave her in Arizona?

‐ That's the plan! And once he does that,

I can come clean to Madison about
all the, you know, lying to her.

‐ Aw. I'm so happy for you.
That's beautiful.

Why'd you stop my scroll for this?

‐ Because I need some non‐Ruby time
with Madison to have this conversation.

‐ Okay, so just make plans with Madison
that Ruby's not invited to.

Millennials make things so complicated.

Your baby doesn't need a gender reveal,
and your problems are not that hard.

‐ Well, I am not great
at excluding people.

‐ Really? It's like my top skill.

For example, I'm having
a huge party this weekend,

and I did not invite
one person from the office.

‐ Right... Wait, what?

Literally not one.

Bye! Have a good day!

‐ I know what we're doing this weekend!

‐ Helping out with a water birth?
‐ Oh my god!

Our kiddie pool!
‐ No fucking way!

‐ Wait, what, this object means
something to you guys?

Okay, immediately feeling left out.

‐ It's our kiddie pool
from Codependence Day.

‐ Sorry, I'm still behind.
What is Codependence Day?

It sounds not‐not perfect for
my general attachment style.

‐ It is a holiday we invented in college.

‐ Summer after freshman year,
we all had horrible Fourth of Julys.

‐ We had to split up
and go to separate parties

with the guys we were dating at the time.

I got food poisoning,
Madison almost lost an eye,

and Jules got, like,
a medically bad sunburn.

‐ You should be able to sue a man

for giving you shampoo
and telling you it's sunscreen.

‐ But, the next day was July 5th,
which we spent together,

and we decided to create our own holiday,

not of our forefathers,
but our foremothers.

I can't believe it's been almost a decade

since our first Codependence Day.

I mean, I also can't believe
you still have the kiddie pool

that we stole from that fraternity.

Well, they more than deserved it.

Fraternities are basically hate crime
festivals featuring beer pong.

‐ I was so good at beer pong.

‐ Jules, it's not like you to take
initiative and bring back our traditions.

Is one of us dying? ‐ No!

I just miss you guys.
We've all been so busy.

‐ I really think she might be dying.

‐ You remind me of me right now.
I like it.

I'm in. Yeah, and we can do it
on the rooftop of my building.

There's a grill,
a place to fill up the kiddie pool.

It's perfect. ‐ Perfect.

‐ Sorry, I just‐‐ I haven't,
like, clearly heard my invite...

‐ Izzy, you're obviously invited!

Tradition‐wise,
you've been grandfathered in.

‐ Uh, grandmothered.

‐ Thank you.
‐ You know, you wake up,

you think it'll be a normal day,
and then... everything changes.

Yes!
‐ Can I, um, can I bring Liv to this?

I mean, you just
haven't been able to spend

that much time with her,
so maybe it could be a good thing?

‐ Codependence Day did have
a pretty strict no boyfriends rule.

I mean,
wouldn't that also mean no girlfriends?

‐ Liv is not my girlfriend.
We're also not in a relationship.

Is that something I'm considering?

Maybe.

Is that something she's considering?

Well, no idea.
She never wants to fucking talk about it.

‐ Blurry relationship status aside,
I say we allow it.

‐ Liv‐invite granted.
‐ Now that I think about it,

I did tell Ruby that we could do something
this weekend. One more addition?

Um... I don't think so.

Unfortunately, the founding principles
of Codependence Day

imply that more than two additions

could start to erode
the integrity of the holiday.

‐ Erode the integrity?

‐ What do you want me to say?
I didn't make the rules.

‐ Well, you actually do because
this is a fake thing that we invented.

Is it okay if this weekend
is just us? I miss you.

‐ Okay, maybe she is dying.
‐ Mm‐hmm.

‐ Aright. Are you ready?
‐ Yes. Hurry up, woman.

‐ On this day, she said,

"Let there be light!"

‐ Basking. I am basking in the glow.

‐ I don't even like Instagram,

but I feel the urge to be basic
and take a picture.

‐ Yeah, that means it's working.
‐ It makes me wanna use the word

"vibey?" I think I'm scared.
‐ No, don't fight it.

That's what these signs are for.

So, I'm hanging out
with the girls this weekend,

and I would love for you to come.

‐ Whoa. Got lost in the sign for a second.
I'm back. Sorry, what?

‐ I think it'd be fun if you came.
It's this holiday

we came up with when we were in college
on the fifth of July.

It's called Codependence Day.

‐ What, you celebrate being
codependent with each other?

‐ No. I mean, yes,

but in a tone less stupid
than the one you just said it in.

‐ I can't bring Bruno
to a sorority party. He's 7.

Although, I do sense he already has,
like, mad game.

‐ Yeah. It's not a big deal.
I just, you know, want us

to do more stuff together, and with Bruno.

Just want us to be like girl‐‐
‐ Stel.

‐ Yeah.
‐ We talked about not talking about this.

‐ Yeah. No, of course.

Not gonna be codependent
about Codependence Day.

‐ Wanna see what this one does?
‐ Yeah.

Huh.

‐ Hopefully, this one doesn't break.

Do you get it? ‐ Mm.

‐ Hi.

You're about to leave?
Well, I look forward

to being alone with you in your apartment

when your ex‐girlfriend
doesn't live there.

I'm excited, too.

‐ Jules. ‐ God. Celeste, sorry.

I didn't hear you.
You're like a Prius in heels.

‐ More like a Tesla in heels.
I have good news.

You can stay in my house
in Malibu for the weekend.

I'm going to Nantucket. You're welcome.

‐ Uh, actually,
I have plans with my friends‐‐

‐ That wasn't an invitation.

I need you to stay there. Last year,
a bunch of beach bums hopped the fence,

and I had to drain the whole pool.

‐ Celeste, I really can't. I‐‐
‐ Jules,

I don't ask you for much. ‐ Um,

I mean, I'm literally at your beck
and call. You ask me for a ton.

You poor thing.

Been trapped into staying
in a luxury beach house

with a salt water pool.
I'm such a monster.

This is the part where you thank me,
and I smile gracefully.

‐ Right.

Thank you, Celeste.

Ooh, that was graceful.

‐ I know.

‐ Hi, it's me! ‐ Oh, hi!

We cleared out Costco. ‐ We?

Oh yeah. Ruby and I
were having lunch, and she offered to be

an extra set of hands on my supply run.

I mean, the way I shop in bulk,
we honestly could've used a sherpa.

‐ Plus, I've never been there,
and I've always wondered what it was like.

‐ You've never been to a Costco?
I think I was conceived in one.

‐ Nope. It was kind of
like a warehouse party,

but with no DJ and a lot of ugly jeans.

‐ Mm‐hmm. So, what's up?
Getting excited for this weekend?

Oh, it's fine!
Ruby knows it's an old tradition.

Plus, she has plans this weekend.
‐ Yeah, I'm going to a barbecue

at the less hot Chainsmokers' house.

He does have
the better personality though.

‐ Naturally. Um,
I actually came over to talk to you

about this weekend. What if I told you

that instead of the roof
of your building, I found

a beautiful Malibu beach house
to celebrate Codependence Day?

‐ Uh, that sounds amazing.
How did you pull that off?

‐ Let's just say I know a person.

‐ Are you kidding me? Celeste?

‐ Wait, Celeste, like Colin's ex?

‐ Look at Ruby knowing all the names.
‐ Wait, Jules, you're kidding me, right?

‐ She's making house‐sit,
and I can't get out of it.

And I know it sounds bad,
but she's not gonna be there,

so there's technically
nothing to worry about!

‐ Wait, nothing to worry about?

That house is fucking haunted for me.

I mean,
you really want me to go back to the place

where I had sex with Colin in every room?

‐ I know,
but it is virtually unrecognizable.

Celeste completely renovated
after they separated.

‐ You can't renovate adultery, Jules!
‐ No, it's true.

My father bulldozed a townhouse
in Manhattan trying.

It was my childhood home.

Honestly,
if it's gonna be at that house,

then... look,
just celebrate without me, I guess.

‐ What?! No way!
It's not Codependence Day without you!

I'm too codependent for that!

‐ Well, I can't go there. Literally.

So, I'm sorry, but...

‐ I'm out. ‐ I'm sorry.

‐ Do you think this
Costco place will take back

50 partially defrosted hot dogs?

You know, whoever said

money can't buy happiness has never been

to a waterfront property in Malibu.
‐ Agree.

Ocean views are like nature's Xanax.

Jules,

can you not enjoy
yourself just a little bit?

‐ It just feels wrong
without Madison here.

I said we could chill,
but I just wanna make it very clear

that we are not having fun,

and we are not celebrating
Codependence Day without her.

‐ Exactly. We are just
three independent women

enjoying some quality time by themselves.

- Next to each other.
- I'm used to

not celebrating Codependence Day,
so I'm good.

‐ So have you talked to hot guitar guy?
What's going on with that?

‐ Hot guitar guy remains hot, and, uh...

I actually ended up
telling Wes I hung out with him.

‐ Oh my god! You're like the Bachelorette.

‐ Well, I think it was
a much‐needed wake‐up call for him.

It inspired some big moves.
That's all I'll say.

‐ Since we're not celebrating
Codependence Day,

Liv might not be as
opposed to coming over.

You wanna invite your girlfriend then?
‐ She is not my girlfr‐‐

‐ She's a girl that's a friend.
‐ She's a girl that's a friend.

‐ And... she's gone.

‐ Hey. What's up?
‐ Hey. So, I am at

this stupid gorgeous beach house,

and I really think that you
and Bruno should come.

‐ Babe, we discussed this.

‐ No, it's not Codependence Day.
I promise. It's just a hang.

And there's a pool.
‐ Wait, a pool?

Yeah, text me the address.
‐ Okay.

Well, my not ‐girlfriend Liv

and Bruno are coming over.

‐ That's great! I'm really good with kids.

Mostly because they think
I'm the same age as them.

Oh! That was quick.

You tell people you have a pool,
they do not fuck around.

‐ Codependence Day is back on!

‐ Holy shit! You're here! Really?

‐ Apparently, Costco's return policy
is very strict when it comes to meat.

‐ Ruby.
‐ I'm sorry I got weird about coming here.

Ruby and I talked about it,
and she told me I'll never get over Colin

if I avoided coming over here.

‐ Wow. Isn't that nice of her, huh?

‐ I'm very good at overcoming
emotional trauma.

- It's basically my superpower.
- My superpower

is knowing every single
celebrity baby name. Hi! I'm Izzy.

‐ Hi. I'm Ruby. I brought hot dogs

and $200 Champagne!

‐ Well, Liv is gonna be mad at me,

but I need a drink. Pop that shit!

‐ Okay, this is my first Codependence Day.

Very huge for me. Where do we start?

‐ Well, an early tradition would be

shotgunning five beers in five minutes

to honor the 5th of July.

But, that's not gonna be happening today.

‐ What? I need a taste of that

college‐Stella vintage wildness.

‐ No, I promised Liv it was
gonna be more of a low‐key,

child‐friendly pool hang.

‐ 'Kay, but she's not here yet,
so what if you shotgun

one beer in one minute
to honor the one and only addition

of your new best friend, who is me.

‐ Let me get a beer. ‐ Yes!

‐ I'm glad I came today.
I've missed you, too.

‐ Really? ‐ Of course!

Yeah, I've just been so busy
trying to meet new clients.

And you! I don't even
know where you've been.

‐ That's actually something I...

wanted to talk to you about today. Um...

I wanted to tell you‐‐

with a proper glass of
Codependence Day punch in our hands.

I think we're missing a few ingredients.

‐ Oh yeah. This thing had,
like, 15 types of liquor in it.

‐ I will go grab them. Be right back.

Hey, uh, are you back already?

‐ No, I'm still here.
‐ I thought you were gonna talk

on the drive, and then leave
after you dropped her off.

‐ I know. I was having the conversation
with Lucy in the car,

but we pulled up to her house,

her mom came out crying.
‐ Her mom?

‐ She found out that Lucy's dad
has another family in Portland

right before we got there,

and now he's leaving them, and I'm here
consoling a 70‐year‐old woman.

You're kidding.

This is a really unfunny bit you're doing.

‐ I literally don't know what to say.
I'm starting to feel like

the universe is conspiring
against us or something.

Is that sobbing?

Yeah, it's her mom. She's been crying.

She and Lucy keep talking about
watching a Nancy Meyers marathon.

I'm not gonna lie, Jules, it's bad.

Unclear on how to extricate
myself from the marathon.

‐ This was supposed to be
the end of this, Wes.

I just don't know how
we can keep doing this.

- I'm gonna go.
- Okay.

I was looking for some mustard.

‐ You heard all that, I assume.
‐ Yeah.

I've heard about that whole Wes situation,

his girlfriend...
‐ Ex‐girlfriend.

‐ Right. Of course. Sorry.

Madison talked to me about it.
‐ She did?

Well, uh, if you could
just not say anything.

‐ So, keep it between us?

‐ No, uh, not a secret in the shady sense.

I'm going to talk to her. I just want it

to come from me in the right way,
so she'll understand.

‐ Totally. All good.

So, uh...

mustard?

‐ Hey, girl.

Codependence Day cocktail.

Thank you. Smells amazing.

‐ Oh, it's amazing. ‐ Cheers.

Cheers.

Bruno!

Bruno! ‐ Hey, guys.

You must be here for the... pool.

‐ Sorry. He doesn't get
out of the city much.

I should probably go after him.
He's not a great swimmer.

He's had, like, three lessons,
and they were over Zoom.

‐ Woo! Chug!

Chug! Chug chug chug! Chug!

Hey!

Wow, you guys came fast! Wow!
‐ We'll just stay for a bit.

‐ Hi. ‐ Hey!

‐ Don't wanna mess up Codependence Day,
which I was told was not happening.

‐ I wanna go in the pool.
‐ Yes! Yes,

let's go in the pool. Here, uh,

here's a little floaty for you. Perfect!

Alright! Yes! This is fun, hey?

‐ There's beer on your chin.

‐ Hey, lady. ‐ Me?

‐ Don't you think I can eat
more popsicles than her?

‐ That's impossible. I'd bury you
in a popsicle eating contest.

‐ I bet she can't. ‐ It's on.

Should we stop this?

‐ My money's on the kid.

‐ Ready? Go.

‐ Are you kidding me?!
‐ I know, I know.

‐ I knew it.
‐ I knew she was gonna tell you!

Yes, fine! I'm hooking up with Wes!

‐ You're sleeping with Wes?

‐ Oh boy.
‐ Of course you told her.

I was an idiot to think that you wouldn't.
‐ You knew about this?

‐ I just found out.
She made me promise not to tell you.

‐ You made Ruby lie to me, too?

‐ Was she not, uh, telling you just now?

‐ She was telling me how she dropped her
contact in Diplo's yacht and got pinkeye.

‐ Oh god. Look,

I was going to tell you today
after Wes and Lucy had their talk

- to clean all this up.
- You've been lying to me.

This whole time. ‐ I...

Because I knew you didn't approve,
and it was just going to upset you!

‐ You're right! It does! I mean,

how can it not after what
happened to me with Colin?

‐ This is a completely different
situation, okay?

It is just not the same.

‐ If his girlfriend is still
in the picture, Jules,

it's more similar than you think.

Do you understand the guilt I carry
around feeling like the other woman.

I wouldn't wish that upon anyone,
especially you.

I didn't know that he lied,
that I was hurting someone.

I mean, this house
is filled with my shame.

Celeste?!

‐ What the hell is going on?

Ew!

‐ Whoa...

‐ I win! I win.

‐ Told you.

‐ That is why I had to have
the pool drained last year.

You didn't tell me you
were having friends over.

‐ Jules, you told me she wouldn't be here.

‐ I trusted you, Jules,
and you betrayed me!

‐ She didn't betray. I betrayed you.
She betrayed me.

‐ I know you betrayed me,
but she betrayed me

by having a pool party with my betrayer.

‐ I understand you're hot, okay?
You're super fucking pissed.

We're all real emotional,

but nobody betrayed anyone!

‐ You invited her here without telling me.
That's betrayal!

‐ I canceled the party,
and I showed up uninvited.

I broke up your marriage!
I am the betrayer!

She lied to me about sleeping with Wes,

so she's a betrayer, too,
but she didn't betray you, okay?

‐ What? Who's Wes?

‐ We said "betray" too many times!
I'm lost!

Enough!

‐ That's enough!

That's enough.

Jules, I'm sorry.

I should've texted you to let you know
I was coming home earlier.

‐ You're apologizing to me?

‐ I want to apologize
to you, too, Madison.

Can we talk?

I stopped being mad at you a year ago.

You know, Colin played both of us.

You're not "the other woman."

You're another woman
who's just as heartbroken

and lied to as I was.

You shouldn't beat yourself up
about it or feel guilty.

‐ Wow. I mean, thank you.

That really means a lot to me, Celeste.

‐ Besides, you're nowhere near as
annoying as that wannabe influencer

who he's engaged to.

‐ She has two Instagram accounts
for her dogs.

Her captions are so dumb!

‐ And the post about her eating pizza
on a beach? I mean, like, really?

‐ Well, I do that.

‐ I do, too. I‐I love pizza on the beach.
‐ Yeah.

It's delicious.

He's gonna be okay.

Izzy is, too.

‐ Hey, you were great with him.

Thanks for all the help. ‐ Yeah.

Some major Mama Bear
energy just came outta me.

‐ Listen, the only relationship I've had
in the last few years has been with Bruno.

It's just always been such
a big risk letting anyone in.

I don't want him to get attached
to someone if they...

don't plan to stick around.

‐ Him or you?

‐ Both. ‐ Well,

I hate to break it to you,
but you're kinda stuck with me.

Remember that bar
we're opening up together?

‐ Hm. ‐ Yeah.

‐ Wanna be my girlfriend?

‐ Do you wanna be mine?

- I was pretty good today.
- You were okay.

‐ Well, you and Celeste really
seemed to hit it off back there.

Well, we both have
the same exact taste in men. Bad.

‐ I'm so sorry I lied to you
about Wes. I was just...

waiting for the situation to become

unmessy before I told you about it.

‐ You can't make it unmessy?
‐ No.

I mean, we've obviously
always been into each other,

but the timing just
hasn't been right for us.

I'm starting to think
it's more than just timing.

This thing with Lucy?
That is major codependence.

I just think it's finally time to move on.
It's not good for me.

‐ I'm proud of you.

‐ And, god,
I'm sorry I blew up at Ruby.

I guess I am codependent with you.

‐ Oh god! Am I worse than Wes?
‐ No!

But we may have to let Codependence Day
go the way of Columbus Day.

‐ I know. That never should've
been a holiday to begin with.

‐ Uh, ladies! Toast!

‐ Oh. I don't understand
this little cesspool,

but why not?

‐ To the new couple, Stella and Liv.

‐ To our foremothers.

‐ To our last Codependence Day!